#isolation tank
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misseviehyde · 1 year ago
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TANKED UP
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Part of Molly knew this was wrong - but it felt far too good to stop now.
She'd found the isolation tank in the basement of the house her family had moved into.
It was a single occupancy tank and full of a rich liquid with enough specific gravity that one could float unaided within it. Sensory deprivation would ensue, leaving you isolated from every other influence.
Molly was scared of the tank - yet fascinated by it. She was an overweight college student with self esteem issues. Anxiety had left her almost crippled, yet somehow the tank seemed to offer the promise of something greater.
She couldn't explain why she had begun using the tank. She couldn't really put her finger on why she began to immerse herself more and more often - but she did.
It made her feel numb.
It made her feel soooo deliciously numb.
Floating in the darkness, alone with only her own thoughts, she felt the same delicious numbing action on her body.
It felt good to go numb. Numb to suffering, numb to kindness, numb to sympathy.
Her emotions became colder, crueler, more selfish. When she came out of the tank she felt stronger, fitter and more dominant.
At first she thought the effects were just psychological - but she soon realised her use of the tank was changing her physically too.
Her body was getting slimmer, fitter, sexier. It felt so fucking good.
She could feel the tank making her evil. As she floated in the darkness, the darkness looked back into her. It spoke to her.
Be a bitch. Be bad. Be mean. Be cruel.
Her friends were nothing. Her family were an annoyance. She was all that matters.
The more isolated she became from others, the more complete she felt. Other people were just toys to manipulate and get pleasure from.
Molly loved how the tank made her feel. She didn't need anyone else anymore. She was all that mattered.
Her tits got bigger, her nails longer. She became impossibly beautiful and flawless. Her intelliegence increased.
The tank was making her into everything she always wanted to be.
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"Yessssss... fucking take it all away," she moaned as she floated in the tank and plotted how she would destroy her friends, ruin her family and have all the things she wanted.
She didn't need much. Just money, sex and power. Everything else was just numb emptiness to her now.
The tank had isolated her from every shred of empathy. She was now a pyschotic, flawless, evil bitch. It felt so good
Molly was fully tanked up and she was here to stay.
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spaceintruderdetector · 10 months ago
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The Deep Self - John Lilly : John Cunningham Lilly MD : Free Download, Borrow, and Streaming : Internet Archive
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ylespar · 1 year ago
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The first sensory deprivation tank, designed by neuropsychiatrist John C. Lilly in 1954 at the NIMH Lab for the study of consciousness.
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carefulfears · 2 years ago
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JUST NOTICED THE FISH TANK IN IWTB. EVERYBODY FREEZE.
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transmechanicus · 1 month ago
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Living alone and so far from my family and closest friends is really really rEALLY hard
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lanada · 7 months ago
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Altered States | Ken Russell 1980
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John C. Lilly, M.D. - The Deep Self: Profound Relaxation and the Tank Isolation Technique - Simon & Schuster - 1977
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steliafidelis · 4 months ago
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while we're talking about the terrible aquatic husbandry of one P. Sherman, DDS, of 42 Wallaby Way (Sydney, Australia), the villain of Finding Nemo, the number one rule of adding a new fish to your tank is that you isolate it first
this is true if you got your fish from a pet store/breeder, but doubley true if you pulled your fish just out of the ocean! what are you doing! you could have wiped out your entire established tank!
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satanfemme · 1 year ago
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if ur ever wondering what I've been up to lately, just know 90% of my thoughts have been like. "wow I'm so puppyboy. I'm so puppy pilled." on a loop, it's honestly become something of a hyperfixation for me I think. but that's ok because being a bit of a puppy is also a big source of comfort keeping me grounded while I struggle to survive life bullshit. a little bit of a puppy grindset getting me thru the 8hr day, u know how it is. I brought home a new squeaky toy today which was a VERY good find (brown standard sized lamb chop, no obvious wear, all five squeakers still in tact). anyway. I'm on like, day five sobriety I think.
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chronal-anomaly · 1 year ago
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Today I'm ruminating on Lena's oh so important relationship with the Blackwatch boys. Cole and Genji being the closest to her in age, aside from Angela maybe, Lena being the last of the child soldiers that Overwatch recruited for the strike teams. Them watching the cycle repeat one more time with the plucky pilot that's been flying since she was 12, and a soldier since 16, recruited on for one hopeless mission. How she looked up to them so much to guide her in the right direction, how she latched onto them as confidantes and family moreso than other members of the team. Overwatch thrust her into the spotlight, with her name and picture slapped across every picture until Tracer became the persona that everyone looked to, but with Cole and Genji she could just be Lena. She missed being Lena.
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spaceintruderdetector · 2 years ago
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https://archive.org/details/TheDeepSelfJohnC.Lilly
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alvisgate · 7 months ago
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The fattest origami crane Alvi has ever seen will fall in front of him. It’s made of a stack of papers as Artem sent a lengthy letter about their Recent Life events
At first, Alvi finds themself excited to receive such a detailed letter. This soon changes as he reads the contents. He is glad and guilty over the results staining his hands. They are concerned over the abandoned boy Artem and Bugboi are looking after, and, though they resist the feeling at first, end up lamenting over all these changes.
Alvi learns in this moment that one can be glad for a friend while also being jealous. It feels like a sickness that almost matches how he fell ill after his first murder. The crane carries the changing scent of Artem's home that they will soon leave behind, and he fears being left behind too. They have watched their friend open their home to a lover and children, and cannot help but wish that they had a place in it(or, at least, in some family's crowded, loving life).
His mind wanders to future Artem, how they cared for him but didn't seem to count him as family, and how they discussed moving his friends and the children to the future for safe keeping. He notes that he wasn't invited, and accepts that their lives are bigger than him. They remind himself that they expected something like this might happen when coming to grips with their aromantisicm anyway. It would have been easier to take if he didn't realize he wanted to be a part of their family the same moment they understood that he likely never would be.
Wiping a face wet from crying, Alvi composes themself enough to write a congratulatory note, thanking both their friend for the update and the stars that Artem's nose was too weak to pick up on the scent of both cinnamon and tears. He sents the message, grabbing Tank and placing him in bed with a book. As Alvi joins him, he pointedly ignores the letter he was going to send to Art and resolves to try to expand his heart in the morning.
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swagging-back-to · 8 months ago
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wait ok im actually blown away apparently it's a VERY big controversy among mouse owners bc new research is showing they like to be in bigger groups in smaller enclosures meanwhile the old recommendations are 20gal for a single mouse + 10 gal per additional mouse---which is mostly based off of hamster care and doesn't actually make sense when you think about it.
and people will FIGHT BALLS TO THE WALLS over it
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maranull · 9 months ago
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working at a pet store has proven to me that if I see a certain animal (or fish) for more than 3 consecutive days I am fully ready to die for it
and it hurts me knowing that the little turtles, fishies and stray cat that we have might be going into homes that either don't know or don't want to provide proper care for them
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nysocboy · 11 months ago
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Gemstones Episode 1.9 Review, Continued: Kelvin goes dark, Keefe goes down, and Captain America saves the day
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This is a continuation of Gemstone Episode 1.9 Review: Jesse is racist, Judy is a rapist, and Kelvin is the Devil
He's not my boyfriend:  Earlier in the episode, Kelvin reveals that "he's coming apart," certain that his lack of interest in women and recent forays into "darkness" signify that he is the Devil.  The siblings tried to comfort him, but apparently it didn't help: he shows up at the teen group wearing a Goth teddy boy outfit, mascara, pale lipstick, dark glasses, and shiny vinyl pants, and announces "I have transformed myself into something Dark."  He's not Jesus, but a vile creature of sin, he must leave them.  
But his replacement, Ronald Meyers (Josh Warren), is "pure": chubby, greasy-haired, an assistant manager at the GameStop.  One can't help but conclude that "pure" means "never had sex," a contrast with Kelvin, who obvioulsy has. 
Kelvin makes a dramatic exit.  Dot Nancy, whom he rescued from Club Sinister, scoffs, as if to say "What an idiot!", and follows. "Is this about your boyfriend?"  Notice that she is not being pejorative; she honestly believes that they are a gay couple.  
Kelvin corrects her:  "Ok, no, he's not my boyfriend. We're just a couple dudes who like to hang out. Why?"  He's being awfully nonchalant -- compare Season 3, where "rumors swirling around" drive him into a panic.  He's already the Dark Lord, a being infused by homoerotic desire, so why get upset over a simple mistake?
Fans who insist that "Kelvin is straight!" often point to this statement, but maybe they're not "boyfriends," partners in a caring, emotionally-fulfilling relationship.  Kelvin believes that Satan is all about sex, not love, so whatever he feels for Keefe -- whatever he does with Keefe -- must be driven solely by lust.   
That will all change in a moment, when Dot shows him Keefe's instagram page. He has returned to his old job as Baby Queef, a performance artist at Club Sinister: "The baby is back!"  and "Haven't I fallen far enough?"  
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Responses from fans: "I'm psyched!  I can't wait!"  "We're off to never-never land!" 
Yelling "No, no, no," Kelvin rushes off. Why is he fine with turning into the Dark Lord, but upset when Keefe becomes one of his followers?  Maybe because his transformation was all about wallowing in self-pity, while Keefe's is for real. He is about to be destroyed, spiritually, psychologically, and maybe even physically.
Gideon in Haiti: Before we can find out what happens next with Kelvin and Keefe, we cut to Gideon in Haiti: colorful "third world" shots of goats, a taverna, Gideon  meeting a group of kids, and so on.  The Water 2 Haiti ministry reflects the real Water for Life, which has been sponsoring well digging and irrigation since 1983. 
Jesse tracks Gideon down and asks him to come home. He refuses: he's doing missionary work to expiate his sins, so he can find peace.   Jesse will have to find anothe way to reconcile with Amber.
BJ is Shocked:  Back to the Gemstone Compound, night.  BJ wants to do a grand gesture to get Judy back (you dumped her, remember?), but Brock the Security Guard makes fun of his name and won't let him in (he lived there before the breakup -- wouldn't Brock know him and let him by default?).  
Rejected at the gate, BJ says "It's time to be a man" and finds an isolated place with a fence he can climb over.  We get a good view of the amusement park as he sneaks through, trying to abandon "childish things," as St. Paul suggested.   But the stealth plan doesn't work:  he is surrounded by security guards and tazed.
The Isolation Tank: Meanwhie, Kelvin is trying a grand gesture of his own (you dumped him, remember?). He arrives at Club Sinister with yet another party going on (or is there always a party in the Satanic realm?)  He pushes through the crowd (and, significantly, shrinks back with audible “Ewww!” at the sight of a naked lady), and finds Keefe's old friend Daedalus.  "Keefe is discovering some things about himself," he says. What does Keefe not know about himself?  Surely he knew that he was gay.  
Then: "I transformed him back into the earliest state of his being. He's sinking beneath his reality as we speak.  He's regressing to a transitive state."  I couldn't find an exact meaning for this phrase, but it probably means a state where you can be transformed into a different person.  
Kelvin threatens him: “Take me to him right now! I will beat your f*ng ass!”   
Daedalus immediately backs down and leads Kelvin to a private room.  Keefe is floating in a milky liquid like amniotic fluid, wearing a gimp outfit with his genitals exposed.  This is performance art: party guests are watching him descend past the womb into oblivion. Some are inhaling or drinking his life force.
Kelvin thinks that Satan offers strength and power; you become a Dark Lord.  But he is wrong.  You become nothing, absorbed and obliterated by the Sadness.
He pushes away the "hissinig demons,"  ignores Keefe's semi-erect penis, jumps in, and starts tearing off the tubes and wires. Um...dude, he gets oxygen from those.  The mask comes off: it is Satan, not God, who forces us to live in masks, hide who we are from the world.
Kelvin kisses Keefe's  forehead and presses their faces together, crying and yelling "Fuck the Sadness."  This is a call-back to Atreyu yelling "Fight the Sadness" in The Neverending Story earlier.   Finally Keefe returns, gasping and sputtering, to the world of the living.  He explains:  “I was so lost without you…then the Beast came for me, and I let it in.  Hold me.” Kelvin responds: “Shh.  I’m here now.”  
"I'm still really high.": a kicker to add some levity to a critical scene.Tony Cavalero states that he and Adam were going to play it for laughs.  Then director Jody Hill told them that this scene was an "affirmation of their love."  So they played it with real emotional intensity, and ended up in tears. This is not a spiritual leader saving his disciple, or a good buddy saving a friend; Keefe is the damsel in distress in a 1940s movie serial or superhero comic book, rescued from certain doom, whispering "if it weren't for you, I'd be...." before the fade out kiss. (Captain America saves Bucky below).
Why don't they kiss?  (Spoiler alert: there is no on-screen kiss until the penultimate episode of Season 3.   From the showrunners' point of view, there are lots of reasons: fear of offending conservative viewers, interest in sparking fan discussion; reluctance to commit to Kelvin being "really" gay.  But for analysis of a naturalistic program, we must pretend that we are looking through a window at real people, whose reactions are consistent what what came before: for Kelvin, kissing means love.  It means a  permanent, exclusive, emotionally intimate relationship. It means getting party invitations as a couple, sitting together at the family dinners, celebrating anniversaries, growing old together.  Kelvin isn't sure that what he feels for Keefe is love, or if romantic love between men is even possible.  He won't be sure until near the end of Season 2.
Or maybe he just doesn't want to kiss a guy who is sputtering a noxious, milky liquid. Would you?
Next: Gemstone Season 1 Finale: Kelvin and Judy begin to heal, Scotty joins the family
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madigoround · 1 year ago
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How many times do you think those dead people cryochambers have malfunctioned or the power has gone out and the generators never kicked on or something where the company just doesn’t acknowledge it because their clientele are all dead anyways
Alternatively; give me a horror story inside a cryogenics facility why are there so many horror stories about cemeteries and not about cryogenic centers that also hold dead bodies that very much feel they have unfinished business because they wanted to be brought back to life before they even died, give me cryogenic ghosts that appear to the employees as desperate tortured versions of themselves because there is no moving on for them as their bodies are suspended forever and the pain of complete isolation in death and a torture they chose and paid a hefty sum for is a fate worse than the irrelevance they originally feared from death
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