#is there a problem with my emotions
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I've been thinking of changing my name again but I'm not sure. I don't want to keep confusing people even if people said it's fine and that I can use my past names, chosen names not deadname, as nicknames but... I'm not sure.
I'm also unsure because I don't know how to feel about my possible new name, my current name is fine and it only feels a tiny bit empty inside when someone calls me it but it also feels fine. My possible new name is also fine and feels a bit good to hear people call me it but it also just feels fine.
I'm not sure what to do. I don't know what I'm most happy with.
All I do know is that I really do like my possible new name, so if I don't use it then I may give it to Deonie. Though, people suggested that I both name myself and Deonie the name if I can't decide but I'm not sure. I'm so confused.
#i dont know#i don't know what i'm doing#i don't know what to do#i can't decide#irl stuff#unsure#character stuff#name ideas#finding identity#confused#I don't know how to feel#is there something wrong with me#is there a problem with my emotions
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mentor
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#gojo satoru#megumi fushiguro#jjk art#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#pulled another allnighter fr Angst's sake cries i havent slept.......but i couldnt help myself i was out all DAY i hadnt drawn all DAY#do u know what that does to a mf i felt all antsy and Wrong#so i cracked an energy drink i think i may have a problem honestly but hey at least u get ur daily dose of megumi angst#remember how i said i considered including gojo in the yuuji/tsumiki/megu squared train piece#well this is me making up fr Not including him there#i ws right his and megumi's relationship deserves its own homage smile :)#anyway @ anon who wanted a gojo/megumi hug.....ik it's not exactly a hug but you can forgive me im sure <3#dare i say it's better than hugs jeremy.....#honestly fr all my gripes w gojo i Did get kind of emo abt this?? but i feel like. the majority of my emotions r on megumi's behalf#also might have been the mukashi mukashi no kyou no boku on repeat that'll also do it#seriously debated putting translated lyrics as the caption but it feels like a copout doing 2 lyric-captions in a row#also i do have some shame. miku lyrics r a bit.#anyway art notes uhhhhh finally got gojo's hair to not look Yuuji#who knew the trick was to make it longer smh maybe sleep deprivation n 10 hours of staring at a screen Does make simple problems hard#oh file name 'proud of you' btw
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I feel like there are a lot of people out there who needs to hear this:
If you dropped out of school because of diagnosed (or undiagnosed) ADHD, Autism, ADD, OCD, Dyslexia, Anxiety, Depression, Bipolar disorder, psychotic disorders, schizophrenia etc… You did not fail. The education system failed you.
#neurodiverse stuff#i cannot say this enough#neurodivergent#actually adhd#adhd problems#autism#just autistic things#actually autistic#actually bpd#actually mentally ill#actually disabled#depressing shit#this gave me more emotional damage than my dad#i am going to rant#i am going insane#dropping out#school problems#send help#you can do this#you cannot convince me otherwise#you can't change my mind#you can do it#i believe in you#i believe in their healing powers#i believe in myself#academic assignments#assignmentwriting#assignment help#in this essay i will
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queen of diamonds, upright + reversed 💎
I've redone this like eighty times, I have to just be done with it now and stop staring at all my mistakes oh no 🫠
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 8 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 8 spoilers#coming in well after the fact but that's what happens when the art doesn't cooperate#and i just HAD to draw something for vil's ob (re-ob?) because i loved it so much#legit put my hand over my mouth and went “oh!” when i realized what was happening#i thought it was just going to be an idia thing because. y'know. closing out his character arc from episode 6 and all#so this was like. oh! oh we're going to get ALL the inky boys!!!!!#i wonder if this is why we got a malleus flashback so early...#not to mention everyone's dreams?!#i am braced for 90% of the dreams to be kind of jokey/inconsequential because we have SO many characters to get through#and most of the time will probably be spent on our lads (literally) dropkicking their emotional problems#but i am excited to see everyone regardless!#and also kind of terrified! what on EARTH will floyd be dreaming about. do i want to know.#i do but do i want to.#man. they're probably not going to get back to it but i do wonder what silver's dream was#what was he doing when he was like 'wait a minute' and noped right out of there#lilia: here silver i made dinner :)#silver: oh boy this looks great! ...YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD#ouuuagh i'm still deep in the blotsauce guys and i'm loving it#come make snowangels in the ink with me it's great
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Sometimes I forget that I have no real friends and go on my phone expecting something; I don’t even know what, maybe them texting me first for once? Someone actually caring? Someone being interested in me or my life at least a little?
#bpd#bpd feels#bpd problems#bpd thoughts#bpd stuff#bpd vent#bpd safe#borderline personality disorder#totheoneswhostayupallnight#emotion dysregulation#bpd blog#borderline things#borderline problems#kill my brain#i wanna kms#sillycide
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Some Batfam Headcanons because the brain never stops;
Jason hates being called "Bruce's Son". But he hates it more when hes called "One of Wayne's Orphans/Wayne's child" because fuck you I'm his son-! wait no--
With the exception of Damian, they rarely refer to Bruce as "Dad/Father". Either it didn't occur to them/didn't see the need to/thought it would be strange. But when Dick/Jason/Tim/Cass are tired or injured it might slip out. And Bruce might just crumble a bit at it
Doesn't mean they don't say it to their siblings when Bruce is out of Earshot.
"Dad said you couldn't." "What do you mean Dad said I couldn't use that mug? It's my mug!" "You snooze you lose Timmy Boy-" "Jason don't be an asshole-"
That being said Bruce says "son/daughter/child" at every available opportunity he can after he knows that they have acclimated enough that they wouldn't be uncomfortable/know they can tell Bruce that they don't want to be called that.
First time Bruce called Dick "son" in a way that meant "You are my kid" and not in a "This police officer just called me son with a brow furrow" way Dick grinned and carried on with the conversation. Later he wondered if his dad wouldn't like someone else calling him Son; but Dick thinks about the life he was given because of Bruce and thinks maybe his dad wouldn't mind.
Calling Jason "son" is a hit or miss situation, even before he died. The first time it happened he was confused, he didnt think that was the relationship they had and it made everything change for him. He got frustrated--not angry--with himself and Bruce at this sudden emotional turmoil. Wasn't he just the kid Bruce picked up in an alleyway? Wasn't he just some street rat in bright Robin clothing? (He lets himself believe that he can be Bruce's son. If for only a little while).
Tim cries after Bruce is out of earshot, it would've been a year or so after his parents died and he was adopted. He didn't think he could have been wanted like that again. Even if you think the Drake's had A+ Parenting or not, I don't think he would have gotten a lot of confirmation of being wanted otherwise.
Cass smiles, emotions carefully concealed under her expression. She's grateful she found Bruce and he doesn't mention it if she leans a bit closer in a request for closeness.
Damian doesn't expect anything less, he only appears satisfied. But also relieved that he has gotten the confirmation that yes, Bruce wants and accepts him.
EDIT 10/11; hiii, i have added Duke, Steph & a Bonus in a reblog you can find on the same blog under my 'batfamily headcanons' / 'sore rambles' tag. have fun :)
#these are just my thoughts#they dont have to align with your own!#i am also trying to find a healthy balance between being emotional and being Angry for jason--#he wasnt the angry robin dammit! maybe emotional and a bit more physical but cmon#points at Dick 'Eldest Daughter Syndrome' Grayson#when dick gets older i would imagine that he would resent being called anything in relation to bruce#if its just for his angst phase when he first becomes nightwing or if hes dealing with his own identity/or going through a fight w bruce#i also find the father / son dynamic with dick & damian interesting so i might ponder on that a bit more#also giving tim insecurity issues about where he fits in with the batfam is important to my soul (i have problems)#sore rambles#lotuspowder rambles#batfam#dcu#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#cassandra cain#damian wayne#batfam headcanons#dc headcanon#headcanon#batkids#batkids headcanon#HI IF YOURE LOOKI
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eyebrows >:^(
#it was becoming a problem- that his subordinates can almost never tell what he's feeling cuz of the mask#(and that his tone of voice is always Very Monotonous)#so he asked Soap to draw him some eyebrows to stick on his mask (he has different ones for every emotion + they vary in thickness)#ok that's all for this morning! im gonna zonk out now!!#my art#2024#call of duty#call of duty: modern warfare#call of duty: modern warfare ii#call of duty: modern warfare iii#cod#cod mw#cod mwii#cod mwiii#modern warfare#mw#mw2#mw3#simon riley#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#art#fanart#digital art#digital drawing#sketch#doodle#video games
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The thing is, it's not about the Therapy Speak. It's not that everyone who disliked DAV hates healthy communication as a dynamic in fiction. It's not even about only being allowed to be a good guy, really, because most of us did do that anyways (though the option not being there is a loss I grieve even if I never chose it myself, but that's another rant for another day).
It's that DAV does all that stuff at the expense of being believable. At the expense of characters being permitted to have personalities. At the expense of emotions behaving the way emotions actually work for people. At the expense of letting the plot build tension through the stakes we're forced to grapple with.
Half the fics out there take the conflicts between the characters in the previous games and resolve them. I do it myself ALL THE TIME because I like to find a path to resolution through just about any conflict, that's what fascinates me about telling these stories. But the higher the stakes, the harder a conflict is to resolve. You CAN resolve any conflict, you CAN communicate healthily through any emotion, but you can't skip the time it takes to process it all to even be able to communicate it. As someone whose got CPTSD and recovered from many Traumas, I can tell you that the TIME it takes to work through it is not something you can fast track, and the ups and downs of your emotions on that journey can't be skipped. It doesn't matter if you know exactly how to do it, exactly how it's going to feel, or exactly what the end state will be, you CAN'T speedrun it.
DAV has stakes that are astronomical, but nobody treats them that way. Nobody experiences denial - a common psychological reaction to being presented with information that shatters your worldview. Nobody expresses any distrust in the establishments handing out this information - something common among cultures that have at times been at war, even if those wars are "resolved" in the present. Nobody really ever breaks down - something that any person is capable of under extreme circumstances, especially when facing multiple crises of faith that challenge everything they thought they knew about themselves. Nobody blows their lid because they've been repressing the hell out of everything. Nobody grieves for southern Thedas, the entire thing dying off screen and giving you, the player, NO way to engage with it in any way.
Not to mention there are barely any inter-party conflicts, when there should be a lot more. Why is everyone (except Spite) fine with it if Emmrich sacrifices Manfred to become a lich? Why is everyone fine with Illario potentially being set free if he was working with the venatori and Elgar'nan, two sources that have actively attacked everyone in the party? Why doesn't Neve resent Lucanis if Treviso is picked? Why doesn't Harding get pissed off at Nevarra for having a secret society of liches that never helped during the Inquisition's war against the breach and corypheus? Why doesn't Harding feel ANYTHING about Ferelden and the rest of the south? Shouldn't Harding resent the fact that she's stuck in the north while her home dies?
All of these conflicts ARE resolvable, but not easily. And it's not believable that they're never brought up. It's not believable that these characters skip through everything that happens with like, barely a frowny face most of the time. In DAO, Alistair leaves if you don't treat his conflicts with respect. In DA2, your party members try to kill each other if you don't pay attention to their conflicts/emotional needs. In DAI, people can leave or betray you, Cassandra throws a chair at Varric and tries to body him out a window. ALL of these can be resolved but it takes effort, and the characters get to SHOW that they're bothered by them and struggling the way a person would when faced with those emotions.
The problem isn't the therapy speak, or that everyone is loyal and won't leave, or that they aren't mean to each other enough. It's that it's toxic positivity. It's toxic as fuck to imply that anger or grief should be smiled over or else you're giving up, and it's damaging to people to avoid engaging with their own negative emotional responses to extremely negative stimuli. It's pasting optimism over very real, very weighty issues, sweeping it all under the rug, and you keep waiting for the lid to blow off the pressure cooker that creates, but it never does. It never becomes anything that emulates real emotions, which is why the whole damn thing feels hollow. Everything's dying and nobody cares, not even about themselves, and that's NOT healthy communication.
It's bullshit, half-assed storytelling that didn't tell us the actual story, just the vague idea of what it could have been.
#zombolouge writes#dragon age#dragon age spoilers#DAV#DAV Spoilers#DAV critical#veilguard critical#been rolling this one around in my head for a while because I know it wasn't “healthy communication” that was pissing me off#I write healthy communication all the goddamn time and people seem to enjoy it#but I also treat the trauma and the problems with fucking respect#ignoring your negative emotions is a form of self-destruction#it's just not how psychology works#and this is indeed not even addressing all the lore conflicts that they want us to think got fixed in the last ten years off screen#or the erasure of the complicated parts of some of the factions *cough the Crows cough*#but like JUST as a baseline JUST the emotional handling of the narrative is wack as fuck
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On the other end
A small dcaXy/n idea I had
Premis: Y/N works part time in the daycare but doesn't really interact with the dca which doesn't mean the dca didn't notice them there.
Start of the story
Y/N gets messages from an unknown number and decides to answer
They start messaging thinking that they don't know each other at all
They notice that the tone and wording in the messages switches completely throughout the day but get used to it way too fast
Y/N's life is a complete mess right now so Unknown is a pleasant distraction
They never tell each other their real names but use nicknames instead
Both share how they feel often and text about life and just anything that they think of
Someday y/n just calls their unknown friend to share some great news because they have no one else they want to share it with
They don't pick up but call back later
A male voice they have never heard answers. A pleasant one. They talk for hours.
But the voice tells them to only call at night bc he can't talk on the phone while working. But texting is fine
Y/N falls in love over late night phone calls and long text convos
They ask if they could meet up and hang out
He doesn't answer
The connection goes silent
The last thing he sent is "I'm so sorry. But I can't" written only a few minutes after their question (in the middle of the day)
Hours go by and they get no answer from him anymore
Hurt and worried Y/N is in a daze of crying and starring at nothing for the rest of the week
This is when Y/N misses their break bc they stayed in the daycare closet to cry
As they step out the daycare is dark sth that Y/N was never there to see
Then they hear it. The voice of the person they love singing from where the kids are sleeping.
Y/N stumbles through the dark until they reach the kids and lock eyes with the daycare attendant
Moon goes quiet and his eyes betray him and show his shock
Y/N is stunned
"It's you?"
Awkward
P2
#fnaf dca#fnaf moon#fnaf sun#dca au#dca sun#dca moon#dca x reader#dca x y/n#fnaf daycare attendant#fnaf dca au#my art#It would probably be fun to switch perspectives between the dca and yn and make the reader an accomplice in the catfishing >:3#There is still the problem of world building but one could just use the pizza plex as the hub for all of yn's problems#I just think seeing sun and moon brainstorm what to answer to yn's messages hilarious#sun losing it and writing near paragraphs of text and moon only using emotes or short form answers#but then turns around and asks the most personal and thought provoking questions ever#And sun having a panic attack when the call happens standing like an idiot in the middle of the daycare#contemplating if he should just pick and run to their room
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Trinity thesis
#this is what I think anyways#my art#dc#dc comics#clark kent#superman#bruce wayne#batman#wonder woman#diana of themiscyra#diana prince#dc trinity#you could honestly argue that any of these apply to all of them but#I think they most strongly apply to these pairings#like Bruce is also pretty lonely but Diana and Clark’s detachment from their homes specifically#is a consistent weakness for them#kryptonite literally being the shattered remains of Clark’s world and any threats or changes to themyscira being what always gets#an emotional reaction out of Diana in fights… they both have homes they’re unable to return to#and Diana is also pretty bad at opening up to people but only because she isn’t aware she has any problems to begin with#Bruce and Clark at least somewhat know when they have an issue. and then tell nobody anyways#Diana and Bruce ohh their parallels make me crazy#their incredible devotion to being a protector that they get so absorbed in they can’t see themselves as anything outside of it?? crazy#I think Clark and Diana also have a shared complicated relationship to their public idolization but I couldn’t#fit that into a concise sentence#I care for them so deeply. None of them are well#sorry for changing the text on this three times
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Eddie’s immediate response to finding out that the guy in their living room was Tommy was to say, “Let’s have sex.”
Steve: Right now? We have a guest!
Eddie: No, we have the guy that beat me up in high school in our living room and I am married to the guy that he had a massive crush on. Tell me that wouldn’t make you a little horny.
Steve: Tommy did not have a crush on me
Eddie: He did. He convinced you that it was totally heteo to make out with your male friends when you were alone
Steve: I mean, Carol was there sometimes
Eddie: That’s - fascinating, I did not know that and we’ll circle back to it but right now… let’s get naked.
Tommy, from the bottom of the stairs: You do know that you’re still live-streaming, right?
Eddie, looking down at the phone in his hand like he’s seeing it for the first time: Yes
#Eddie being messy on the internet 2024#Tommy later that day is like: Hey man. sorry about high school. I didn’t know how to work through my emotions#and Eddie’s like: Yeah no problem. I’ve been inside your best friend#and then they start swapping Steve stories and Steve is like: oh no#eddie munson tiktok saga#steve harrington#eddie munson
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we may watch the same show but i watch it gayer
#i'm a hater i don't care#liking cobra kai is a red flag for Certain People#if i hear nerfed or the word prime again i'll lose my mind#this could turn into a whole rant about their Hawk Prime#aka eli when he's being manipulated and becomes violent and suppresses his emotions and is overall pretty shitty and hella insecure#or prime miguel when miguel turned into an alpha jerk and took johnnys teachings too far#like that's not his nature he's at his core A GOOD KID#don't get me started on their hate for FEMALE CHARACTERS FOR NO REASON#like my girl sam has her problems throughout the show but she GROWS and doesn't deserve the hate#OR DEMETRI#like ???? demetri was the third person to join miyagi do in s2#he's not naturally athletic but why is a wild concept that he could be good at karate???#i just can't#cobra kai#ck#binary boyfriends#hawkmetri#miguel diaz#tory nichols#sam larusso#demetri alexopoulos#robby keene#eli moskowitz#hawk cobra kai#samtory#keenry#lawrusso
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#dcmk#detco#sharing this bc i made it and now i think about it all the time#ft exclusively emotes from my discord server#ive made many silly things since rereading conan and i think i should put them in the world and make them everyone else's problem
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(almost) four years in, and I finally had time to draw something for the anniversary! woo! 🎉🎉🎉
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#because i need to talk for a minute about how the plot of the anniversary story so far is literally just#crowley jumpscares us in our living room to demand we make him lunch and yuu is just like 'i need to start locking the door'#oh twst you always know just how to get me#the qol updates though! CONVERTING SINGLE KEYS INTO 10-SETS YES THANK YOU OH MY GOD#SKIP LESSON TICKETS!!!!#3X BATTLE SPEED!!!!!!!!!!!!#SAVE TEAM BUILDS AND SUPPORT CARDS FINALLY AHHHHH#oh and some other stuff too but look i NEEDED these things#also master chef grim! he's so precious!#though he's not going to get a little sporty uniform after all?#grim canonically flies in the nude i guess#no it's okay chef grim is ADORABLE#if you zoom in on his card you can see little smoodges from his inexpert cake decoration ��#which on the one hand is cute but on the other hand i'd been convinced he'd just slapped some frosting and candles on an actual can of tuna#anyway happy (a few days until the) fourth anniversary everybody!#i've been here since the beginning (preregistered during the dorm reveals babyyyy) and it REALLY doesn't feel like it's been four years#you know what they say: time flies when you're watching anime characters have emotional problems
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Hating myself is really easy so I won’t blame you for hating me too
#bpd#bpd feels#bpd problems#bpd thoughts#bpd stuff#bpd vent#bpd safe#borderline personality disorder#totheoneswhostayupallnight#emotion dysregulation#borderline problems#bpd blog#kill my brain#borderline things
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I feel bad for neglecting Hazel so much, I do have many thoughts about her.. and also a mermaid au that im probably not going to do anything with
#fop#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#fairly oddparents a new wish#hazel wells#fop hazel#fop dev#dev dimmadome#art#digital art#doodles#I wish Hazels parents were more flawed tbh...#Like I get why they wanted to have them be good rep so that young people could know what a good family is supposed to look like#but it felt like every time there was an opportunity to have them do something genuinely flawed-#they would perfectly sidestep it before it even became a problem#I really enjoyed the first episode because it showed a hint of a very unique emotional issue Hazel had related to having a therapist mother#The idea that she has to be mature all the time#constantly living around therapy speak makes her feel like she isnt allowed room to breathe#Feeling unable to express her emotions without someone there giving advice that she isnt ready for yet#just small things!#She feels so pressured to be emotionally mature all the time BECAUSE she gets praised for it#maybe im projecting everyone always tell me I was so mature for my age...#But like I really really wanted to see that from her!!#And then after that episode it doesnt even come up again#The only other episode that features the moms job as a conflict is the one where she wants to spend more time with her#which is a fine conflict I guess but it still ends with her saying all the perfect things#I wanted Markus to be more of a genuine threat too. even if he didnt actually do anything having him be more looming would have been nice#I feel like they mostly forget hes a para scientist most of the time idk.#I just felt like his interactions could have been more unique#Maybe he will be in future seasons idk
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