#totheoneswhostayupallnight

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Ah yes nothing like another day spent hating everything about me, my personality and my body

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Sometimes I forget that I have no real friends and go on my phone expecting something; I don’t even know what, maybe them texting me first for once? Someone actually caring? Someone being interested in me or my life at least a little?

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Feeling like everyone either hates or dislikes you is a different kind of pain..

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

I feel so out of place

and I don’t really know who I am

and half the time I don’t know how I feel until I feel like I might burst because of what I’m feeling

and I’m so tired

and I wish I never existed

and I wish I could start my life all over again

and I wish I could do everything I want to in this lifetime

and I wish I knew what I want for my future

but I also kinda wish I never existed to begin with.

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Hating myself is really easy so I won’t blame you for hating me too

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

I’m so ugly. Inside and outside.

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

I’m supposed to feel better so why am I not feeling any better at all?

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

But really I guess I’m just a sad pathetic existence on this planet

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Will you love me when I’m dead?

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Maybe the reason for why I’m so miserable is that I should’ve died a couple years ago..

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

I just know that when I wake up and feel really happy, someone or something will ruin this happiness within a couple seconds; my day will end horribly. There are no happy days for me. That’s just my life.

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Sometimes I wish the ground would open up and swallow me whole; I feel like that’d be a great way to go

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Funfunfun times..

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Whatever, man. What fvcking ever.

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

Can I borrow a gun? Cause I need to kill myself

[totheoneswhostayupallnight]

I miss the time when people around me saw me for me and not my illness