#Like I get why they wanted to have them be good rep so that young people could know what a good family is supposed to look like

[bunnieswithknives]

I feel bad for neglecting Hazel so much, I do have many thoughts about her.. and also a mermaid au that im probably not going to do anything with

[astrologydayz]

ASTROLOGY FUCKING NOTES

WHY do people say that if someone's planets falls into your 7th house, then YOU'RE THEIR IDEAL LOVER??? Bitch bye. If someone's planets falls into YOUR 7th house, then U DIG THEM OR HATE EM, AS IT'S YOUR 7TH HOUSE! Let's say that your crush planets falls into your 1st and 7th house, then obviously u like their looks (1st house) and the way they show themselves off 2 other people, (how they treat other people/people u know (7th house! Don't project.

Pluto conjunct Ascendant in synastry, is a stalker aspect🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️. It kinda reminds me of Hailey running around after Justin at his interviews, when they were young and he had no idea🤨🫣😭🤣 . SO FUCKING CREEPY. Pluto is obsessed, and way 2 "fixated" on the asc person. It can get dangerous, cuz ASC person has no idea about how deeply the obsession runs with Pluto, fr💀. The worst part is that they usually know that the Pluto person can be kinda "creepy", but not about how deep it actually runs. U won't ever really know with Pluto, cuz they won't even give out 20% of their secrets - they can't help it. Unless they literally have no aspects from Pluto 2inner planets in their own natal chart.

Your Bella asteroid - 695 conjunct/trine/quintile someone’s ASC means that the ASC person finds u really beautiful, (physical attraction) 🍒🫦. With the opposition it's on & off, like sometimes yeah and other times no - It switches. With the square/quincunx - takes time, but grows into a really strong attraction, the longer you're 2gether/know each other.

Why the fuck do people think that 8th house energy is only about sex and intense connections? If a person has planets in your 8th house = that person does not like u 9/10 times. They'll talk shit about u when u ain't present/gaslight u/do things behind your back. They're usually jealous of u. Trying 2 cross your personal boundaries all the fucking time. WHO GOT TIME4THAT?? NOT ME LOVE⚠⚠.

Why do Cap inner placements/points always get a "boring", or a "cold" rep? We just don't like u? Trust me. We'll show u a good time, if we think you're worth it.

Jupiter is not only good. It enlarges EVERYTHING. So if someone has Sado asteroid (118230) conjunct Jupiter in their natal chart = a very smart/knowledgeable Sadist. They want to know everything! Hours&hours of research. They can't get enough with Jupiter! They're into some sick shit, and can use some really AGGRESSIVE ways 2 create that "pain and suffering". "shhh, I'm here baby, it's okay"🤨. 9/10 times = addiction 2 being that Sado "teacher" with Jupiter here🔞🔞. They can even brag about it!

Nessus asteroid - 7066 in synastry can definitely cause sexual attraction. But the Nessus person will always take advantage of the other person, no matter what. It may not be as "in your face"/prominent, like it is with the conjunction/square/opposition, but it will take place. Some can like Nessus contacts in synastry, if they have Nessus aspecting their own planets - especially inner planets, or points. And they can also handle Nessus energy way more, than someone who doesn't really have any Nessus contact, as they're already used to it. It doesn't make it good tho.

WOMEN with Black Moon Lilith conjunct/square/opposite Mars can hate being touched by men. Can also have trouble regarding intimacy with men in general/bc of their experiences with them🪚🪚. I have this, and if a man touches me out of nowhere = I'll punch him back 2 the year he should have stayed in a fucking condom 🦄.

Lilith asteroid - 1181) in 3rd house synastry can mean that the house persons siblings doesn't like Lilith if it's "poorly" aspected😮‍💨😮‍💨. Or that house persons siblings doesn't even want 2 try 2 create a relationship, because they already heard so much "shit" about Lilith🫠🫠.

💜 Pluto conjunct asteroid Valentine - 447) in a natal chart loves so fucking hard. They'll literally take a bullet 4 the person they love. They don't “create” a connection with anyone easy either. They're so intense when it comes 2 love, and with how they connect 2 another being. They transform/find themselves - Pluto, through those few people they do end up loving. Most people can't handle their intense ways of showing love🖤🔫.

Inner planets in Gemini degrees 3/15/27° in a natal chart are the real champions, when it comes to overthinking - but knowing everything beforehand. They already thought about ALL the different outcomes, 2 every fucking situation!🫰🫠😍🤭. They already know what time it is, before u tryna tell em.

Look at your Vertex persona chart 2 c what kind of fated things you're supposed2 go through in this life ✍👀. Make a synastry chart and c if your Vertex chart makes any significant aspects 2 your natal! It can show important life events/secret fated "events" that won't be seen in just natal or Vertex pc alone👽.

Lol, I'VE SEEN A LOT OF PEOPLE SAY THAT ARIES RISING WILL HAVE RED HAIR, OR COLOR THEIR HAIR RED AT SOME POINT? I'm an Aries rising, and I would rather get shot in the face. I'm naturally blonde, and honestly? I haven't met a single Aries rising who has red hair, or would color their hair red.

Anti - Vertex persona chart shows what YOU choose2 let into your life, and what u choose 2 do without fate intervening. It also shows u how u choose 2 act, in moments where u find no "meaning", and that's where your Vertex pc comes in right after - Fate intervening 🔮🔮.

Pluto opposite ASC/conjunct DSC in synastry can show the Pluto person deciding/or trying to at least, who the house person talks 2/surrounds themselves with. They can think a person is "bad company" 4 the house person. They can be in DSC persons business, a lot! House person is alarmed/or not, depending on how Pluto is aspected in their own chart. If Pluto is afflicted = they kinda like it.

ANYONE who has benefitted/benefits from me = a planet/point/NN/Vertex/asteroid conjunct my POF. Your POF is all the things (material/or spiritual wealth/growth), u have "picked up" on/will pick up on throughout your life. U "help" others with that planet/point or asteroid in synastry💰🦉💳.

Star asteroids - Starr - 4150), Kallisto - 204), Fama - 408), Europe - 52), actor - 12238), Lumiere - 775 - acting, Apollo - 1862), Talent - 33154), Klio - 84), Fan - 151590), Records - 30718), Varuna - 20000) Webb - 3041).

✨✨✨✨🎭🎬🎨

Music, writing&poetry asteroids - Polyhymnia - 33), Euterpe - 27), Apollo - 1862), Terpsichore - 81 - song and dance) Luscinia - 713 - Singing), Melpomene - 18, Harmonia - 40), Erato - 62), Kalliope - 22), Singer - 10698), Cantor - 16246 - singing), Poesia - 946), Parthenope - 11 - singing), Tone - 1266), Echo - 60), Mnemosyne - 57). 

🎤🎧🎼

"Lucky asteroids" - Fortuna (19), Opportunities - 39382), Paradise - 2791), Winner - 15606), Abundantia - 151), Angel - 11911), Bless - 92891), Bonus - 10028), Tyche - 258), Midas - 1981), Magion - 2696), Spirit - 37452), Nike - 307).

🍀🍀🍀

Please look at these asteroids in synastry. Prey - 6157), Sado - 118230), Devience - 21419), Nessus - 7066), Pain - 5188), Lie - 26955), Blink - 4425), Nemesis - 128), Swindle - 8690), Lilith - 1181), Hades - h41), wild - 1941), Fanatica - 1589), Medea - 212), Savage - 29837), Not - 2857), Pervert - 18624), Hard - 28077). 

🔞

THANKS4READING BABE!!

Appreciate u, always❤️

[bluespiritshonour]

Water Siblings and Fire Siblings as Foils

Katara and Sokka are peak sibling rep: they bicker, they hurt each other, they take turns being the voice of reason while the other goes batshit crazy—and they'd die for each other.

And very clearly Sokka's daddy's boy and Katara's momma's girl: and for most parts, they seem to be content with that dynamic.

Look, parents have favourites, let's establish that first: don't come at me for it.

But in a healthy environment, where all of the kids’ emotional needs are met irrespective of which kid gets along with which parent, they're less likely to tear themselves apart yearning for parental affection.

Sokka and Katara's family was a normal one, a healthy one—as healthy as one can be in a war ravaged world—and Sokka and Katara are normal siblings. Even after their mother died Katara doesn't seem to care much that Sokka gets more time with their father. And everytime she brings up their mother Sokka gets this weird look on his face, which, I think is later explained by the fact that he feels guilty that he doesn't even remember what their mother looked like. And it's not because Katara seems to know more about their mother despite being younger.

Neither of them grudge the other for having been close to one of the parents—let's call it ‘being close to’ instead of ‘dad/mum loved you/me more’ because that's what would come up with Azula and Zuko.

One can say that Azula's daddy's girl and Zuko's momma's boy... Except it isn't like that.

Azula wasn't loved by her father; neither was she close to him. If anything she had the illusion that she's close to him. But children can sense when they aren't loved, which can explain why she took her mother being close to Zuko so hard. Because she didn't get that from her father and isn't she supposed to be daddy's girl? But dad's good to her; mum... isn't. Dad lets her do what she wants... As long as she obeys him or she'd end up like Zuko.

For Ozai, both his children are pawns. He uses Azula to abuse Zuko, which in turn is to get at Ursa. And honestly, Ursa was a bad mum and an abuse victim and not the villain are takes that can co-exist.

A lot of mums in primarily patriarchal cultures end up abusing their own kids while trying to protect them in an environment where they themselves hold little power.

Ursa and Hakoda can be compared in this.

Katara haters can look away: she isn't whiny. And even if she is, well, she takes responsibility when no one else does so I guess she deserves to complain if that's what it takes. Katara is extremely mature. When she was mad at Hakoda, she still had the critical thinking skills to point out that yes, she understands why he left. He had to! She doesn't blame him for that, it wasn't his fault that there was war going on—but it still hurt!

And what does Hakoda do? He hugs her and apologises. He doesn't defend himself, because he doesn't need to. She understands! She said she does and he doesn't insult her by making excuses. He acknowledges and validates her pain.

Unlike Katara, who grew up in a healthy family with parents and grandparents and a whole community—Azula was isolated and under the influence of Ozai. And she was so young! If you remember being that young, you'd remember thinking that parents are always right. You don't realise that parents make mistakes too—and while her emotional needs weren't being met by Ozai, she turned to Ursa—but Ursa was at her wits end trying to undo the damage of Ozai's abuse on Zuko.

If she had given attention to Azula, Zuko, who thought that Azula was perfect and already had father's approval would have gone off rails—and since she didn't... Azula went off the rails.

Which was exactly how Ozai would want it. I don't like the comics much but it made sense that Ozai would hold both the children as bargaining chips against Ursa. Ursa made her choice, or rather, the illusion of her choice and Azula had to pay for it: the real reason Zuko could turn over a new page while Azula couldn't was because from the very beginning, Zuko had his mum and uncle.

Azula had no one!

Like Hakoda had to go to war and leave his children behind, Ursa had to choose between Azula or Zuko; Ozai orchestrated it as such.

But while there were people to pick up Hakoda's slack, there was no one to guide Azula. Sokka and Katara raised each other and they had Gran Gran.

Zuko and Azula were constantly pitted against each other by a war-mongering father.

I don't like this unrealistic expectations that fandom has of a family where both the siblings not only love each other equally, they also process emotions similarly (see: the Sokka vs Katara debate on how they both react to trauma) and parents who love all the kids equally.

Katara and Sokka are normal and realistic in the way that they are both different people: they process grief differently. Katara takes up responsibly and grows up too fast, it takes a toll on her and she's vocally expressive. She turns her grief into anger. Meanwhile Sokka internalises it in a survivor's guilt kind of way.

There's also gender involved in the way both pair of siblings interact. It's more subtle for the fire siblings than the water sibling. Plus, Suki makes Sokka drink his respect women juice, please y'all don't call Sokka sexist. That was character development for him which was addressed. I could make another post for gender and A:TLA.

And they both love each other dearly and they're okay with the fact that one is daddy's boy and the other is momma's girl. It's okay.

In contrast Zuko yearns for his father's affection and Azula yearns for her mother's. And while Zuko feels inadequate, for Azula it's “behave or you'll end up like your brother.”

She also learns to derive a sick sort of pleasure from watching Zuko suffer—which is entirely her father's doing. Because in rare moments when she doesn't have anything to gain by getting Zuko into trouble...she actually kind of looks out for him. It's extremely rare and sprinkled here and there to show us the Azula that could have been.

And I don't think Zuko really realised that Azula was abused too—not until he lets go of his father. Until the final Agni Kai. What I love about it is that despite portraying Azula as Zuko's tormentor for 3 seasons (and she was his tormentor) they did not frame the Agni Kai as some epic good vs evil shit.

Because from Zuko's point of view Azula was perfect. He's out here vying for his father's affection while she gets it freely. She's so lucky!—until he lets go of his father and realises what a monster he was... And he also realises that father never really loved Azula either...

They didn't say as much in words. But the final Agni Kai is proof enough. Zuko doesn't rejoice bringing Azula down (technically Katara did it). At this point, I guess, he realises that Azula's a kid too. Even younger than him—that their father couldn't care less about either of them.

Okay. I really do think that Zuko suddenly becoming invested in Azula's redemption would make sense after the Agni Kai. I also read this Twitter thread by Aaron Ehasz where he says he had plans for Azula's redemption and it was fantastic.

So yeah. Without being overt, the water siblings and fire siblings are contrasted by each other. Which is why I don't like the comics trying to do this brother-sister thing where they put Sokka and Katara and Zuko and Azula in back-to-back panels like... Even if I'm a huge supporter of Azula-deserves-redemption I didn't like those panels in the comics.

P.S. don't pit Sokka and Katara against each other. You aren't Ozai. They're different people who process trauma and loss differently and hence, react differently.

Adios.

[cristinacclearwater]

Robin Time Travel AU!!

A fic where Dick or Damian or Jason or all three time-traveled and stop Ethiopia from happening... Only they didn't anticipate the consequences.

With no Ethiopia happening, Jason never dies and neither does Bruce go off the rails... Thus never giving Tim a reason to join the Batfam...

Dick never saw nor tried to find out exactly how bad Bruce got after Jason... And was waiting for Tim to find him again... Even going to Harley's where they met... Keeping the entire schedule for the week very simple for Tiny Tim to easily follow... Only Tim never shows up...

Jason does not know the circumstances of Tim joining and is wondering when Bruce is bringing Timbo home...

While Damian convinced Talia that it is better for him to join his father in Gotham... By 'investigating' and 'arriving' at the 'conclusion' that his father is Batman... Thus he comes to Gotham early... Like months before Tim... Like he coincided with the week Jason would have died...

Again, he does not know the circumstances of Tim joining... Just knowing that this time when he has Robin, it will be on Tim's terms... He is looking forward to a good relationship with him because Dick said Tim always wanted a little brother and now Damian has the chance to be that little brother... No, he is not jealous of YJ or how close they are with Tim, or that bloody speedster... What are you saying!?!!!

Tim never comes.

Now, Tim on the other hand decided to explore Paris and gets caught in shenanigans... Meets Lady Shiva... Gets mentored by Lady Shiva... Unknowingly insults Snake... Gets challenged by Snake... Defeats Snake... Refuses Lady Shiva's offer... And comes back to Gotham... Only this trip was a year or 9-10 months long...

In Gotham, he takes up the cape... Works smaller crimes, nothing with rogues (like Spider-Man) and becomes beloved... Of course, Tim is still that little stalker at heart and keeps updating the Bat's info... he doesn't want to be burdensome to them, Thus, Tim makes sure Bats and him don't cross paths... After all, Batman might feel obligated to take him in as he did Batgirl, Spoiler, and Black Bat... They didn't have training. He does...

Meanwhile, Batfam is wondering where they went wrong and missed Tim... And slowly Dick starts remembering the context as to why Tim sought him out... Not to be Robin but to make him take Robin back up... And when Dick refused to... Then Tim took up the job of keeping Batman in line... Because Gotham needs Batman and Batman needs a Robin...

Dick tells Jason and Damian... They don't believe... Because of course, my info is not wrong... He was replacing me/was an interloper... It takes them that entire year to accept that Tim is not coming... Then scrambling to find him... Then they started hearing rumors... Of this little vigilante who helps with small crimes... And try to intercept him, maybe introduce themselves, to no avail... It was as if Gotham herself was against it, they always missed him...

Meanwhile, Tim's life continues pretty much same as in earlier comics... Batfam, out of the city, Metallo attacks Gotham... Tim calls Superboy... Thus, the first meeting of TimKon, same as comics. Only, instead of Tim, he travels as Alvin Draper, a child who was helped into his seat by his parents and will be picked up by his cousin Shanks at the airport... Actors he hires to help him... And "will you please watch him, we are so scared he will be traveling alone"... The story works for both going and then returning and Cousin Shanks helps Alvin back onto the plane when needed...

School trip for Bart and I do not believe much will change with Bart as he will know Tim's rep from the future, rather than the past, so Bart still believes Tim's awesome... And makes friends...

They still start Young Just Us... And still go on every mission they did in YJ98... Tim still develops a rapport with Batman... Only he is not his Robin or known as his prodigy... Compared to when Batman taught him everything and knew him well, lying to Batman was quite easy for Tim... Because Tim grew up in Gotham society and was his mother's son through and through...

Tim's parents are not bad in this either... Like can Janet put the fear of god in businessmen? YES... But when it came to family and especially Tim, she was soft... I see Tim's relationship with his parents same as Kudo Shinichi's from Detective Conan... Like they have wanderlust and Tim does not... But just because they are not in the same country or continent, does not mean they do not keep in contact... They know exactly what shenanigans Tim gets up to and know better than to stop him because otherwise, he will just hide them... They know all his friends, his interests, etc... Especially his mom, and hiding about Robin probably hurt their relationship a lot...

{I 100% believe the only reason Tim didn't tell Jack he was a vigilante was because he was Robin and thus was responsible for the entire Batfam identities... And that is why Jack believed Tim did not choose but rather was coerced into being Robin because otherwise they would already know...}

So, in this fic, Tim keeps his parents in the loop from the beginning and Janet makes sure a part of DI is dedicated to helping Tim, so he's never without help in Gotham... Also, they know life is dangerous so they get separate mobile/communicators for "just emergencies", like a "Need help! Will die if not given" button... So Tim knew the moment his parents were taken by Obama Man and rescued them with Young Just Us...

Because NO BATMAN RULES thus Tim was able to tell his parents and team his identity much earlier than in canon... He still makes contingencies for fellow heroes, especially Justice League, including the entire Batfam, including Alfred... Because Janet Drake's son is taught better by her mamma... And Tim does not know Wayne beyond being a fanboy and does not have an emotional connection to them...

Just a fic where Batfam lives happily and Tim is successful but they never have more than a coworker relationship... Like Tim is closer to Wally or Donna or Roy or Bisaro or Jon than Dick, Jason, and Damian because they have a familial connection to his team, while Batfam only has the connection of Gotham... Like Oracle has the most influence over Tim's actions in his vigilant life because she sometimes directs him to crime if no one else is available...

Tim is still friends with Stephanie but here Tim's self-respect and confidence are not broken again and again and again... So Stephanie does not get away with treating him like shit on or off the field and that's dangerous on the field, so they mutually decided to not team up unless with a mediator in between that could lead both...

Off-field they are good friends, friends who know their secret life so they can share any grievance, WITHOUT endangering any identities, etc... But they do not date... Tim dates Ariana, yes. And felt Stephanie might be a rebound and knew she deserved better than that. If Stephanie confesses, Tim makes it clear he is not in a position to date yet (don't know if the timeline is right, if not feel free to correct)...

{OK, one thing I make clear, No hate for the character of Stephanie Brown but I just hate how she treats Tim in Canon and everyone acts like it's OK because it's not. It's fucked up and a toxic relationship. Especially how Bruce used their relationship later and Stephanie agrees)...

Tim also seeks mental help for the school shooting and other civilian events, while Jack is looking for a trusted therapist for his son, Janet absolutely approves... When they have one, Tim gets a contract of confidentiality from John Constantine to sign for the therapist and drags his team, kicking and screaming with him...

With the team being introduced to the Drakes early, they spent a lot of time in Gotham, and adults (Janet) understand what is happening with Ross, Tana, etc. And helps Kon before telling him to stay with Tim, "because that boy absolutely cannot take care of himself, never mind he has done so for years, you stay with him, do you want to go to Gotham Academy or do you like your current one"... While Jack is ready to smack some sense into Flashes, with his golf stick... And becomes quite good friends with Max...

Just competent adults who understand they can't stop their wild child but can and will give him every tool to survive.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - The Heat is Rising

Sorry this late, blah blah real life actual job blah blah.

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

June 2024 Week 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

Wandee Goodday (Sat YT) ep 8 of 12 - Why is it so good?! It’s unfair. Cause I know pain must be incoming. Also... Yak moved to the "rao" pronoun for his confession! SO ADORABLE!!!!! Can you see me kicking my feet and squealing with joy on this side of the screen? Well I am. 

Sunset X Vibes (Sat iQIYI) ep 2 of 12 - I think I'm finding this show a lot funnier than the show is trying to be. The pose in the doorway. The sparkle pants. The creaking of the leather. It’s all hilarious. The foot massage. So silly. Simultaniously, full of thirst. Yay! I like thirst. Not entirely sure why he’s dicking him around and not dicking him out but hey the tension is fun. Also the shot staging is very good. Very yaoi. Lin going to have so much power in this relationship once he starts trying on seduction for size. All just to say, it’s good and I’m enjoying it.

My Stand-In (Fri iQIYI) ep 9 of 12 - you know I'm enjoying it a lot, so a surprise to see a Star Hunter beat it out? It's just MosBank are SERVING classic BL and I am a sucker for that kinda smut. Back to Stand-In...

It’s sad and a little complicated and interesting. And I’m still enjoying it very much. But this episode was mostly a rehash of information we already had been given, it was slow. Although since the acting is so good in this particular show, I didn’t mind it as much as I might have in a pulp piece, for example. 

My Love Mix-Up Th (Fri YT) ep 3 of 12 - I’m very much enjoying this. Not quite as much as I initially enjoyed the JBL version. But I’m liking a lot. There’s something particularly high school teen YA angst about this IP. Even more so than something like Make it Right or Love Sick. It’s just the cringe reactions and the constant embarrassments and the roller coaster of emotions that each character goes through in every scene. I forgot how exhausting it is to be a teen.

We Are Cute (Weds iQIYI) ep 12 of 16 - We Are Cute continues to be very cute indeed. Honestly Phum doesn’t need to flirt with Peem, Peem is already in love. The learning about each other is fun, but the fact that Phum still constantly communicates via kissing is great. I love that we have a couple whose love language is smooches. TanFang endgame is my favorite, I fucking LOVE them. But... NO SINGING. Worst fake band ever? Place docked in BL standing this week for that alone.

Love Sea (Sun iQIYI) ep 2 of 10 - It's fine I guess? Trash watch here.

Knock Knock Boys (Thurs Gaga) ep 5 of 12 - It’s ridiculous and they're very cute and I kind of don’t know what’s going on. But the young one getting his first dildo and skipping with excitement was utterly adorable. And it is the first rep we’ve got for such a thing in this genre. So good on you little pulp!

Only Boo! (Sun YT) ep 11 of 12 - Everything felt a little rushed and oddly paced in this episode. Not entirely sure why K came back to him. Anyway, I hope it’s all explained in the finale.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

At 25:00 in Akasaka AKA 25 Ji Akasaka de (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 10fin - I’ve made no secret about the fact that I haven’t been wild about this show.

Here’s a few things I enjoyed about the final episode: Uke initiated the sex scene!! Lots of tenderness. Long takes plus the absence of (and then very gentle introduction of) music. Unexpectedly high heat. Condom rep! The gayest bedroom layout ever. What I didn’t like: The absolute pinnacle of frustration for P'ABL on the other side of the screen wanting to grab the leads and shake them until their teeth rattled and scream "FOR THE LOVE, just TALK to each other!"  Oh but they are so cute and SO POLITE when the finally do reconcile! 

In conclusion:

A BL about the making of a BL where the famous one has a crush on the obscure one. It’s already been done.  Recently. By Japan. I would be tempted to say "better" but I didn’t like the first version either. At least this was less stalkery? Look, this show was fine. Just, in a word: cool, unengaging, and frustrating. OK that was 3 words. But they’re apt. A lackluster offering with a great ending. How to rate that? I despaired but ended up on 7/10 - do better Japan, I know you can.

Blue Boys (Korea YouTube) - it got its part 2, thank the BL gods, rounding this one into an 8 ep series. Still short (those eps barely scrape 10 min at most) but a solid little offering.

Charming reunion romance full of class + coming out struggles and great chemistry all of which was let down by a curtailed length. Had it just been given some legs, it could have grown wings and taken flight, but in the end it is simply too short. Still enjoyable and certainly worth your time. Cause ya don't need much of it. 8/10 RECOMMENDED

It's airing but...

The Last Time (Thai Fri YT?) - Convoluted story of loss and possible reincarnation or something. Can't find it.

OMG Vampire (Thai Sun ???) 10 eps - I've put the search on hold for a bit and y'all can let me know if it's worth tracking down.

In case you missed it

I mean you were under a rock on Tues Jan 18th Thailand's senate passed the Marriage Equality Bill. As of typing this, the King still has to sign it into law, but he's unlikely to veto. So it's a matter of time before everything is official. Thailand follows Nepal (2024) and Taiwan (2019). Both of those were judicial, Thailand's is legislative.

Let's Eat Together Aki and Haru 2 AKA Aki wa Haru to Gohan wo Tabetai 2 Haime! (Japan movie) - Continued the (frankly) lackadaisical story from part 1 and was meant to drop yesterday. We thought maybe Gaga, but nothing so far.

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer released to Korean theaters 5/25. HoTae & DongHee, side couple from Unintentional Love Story are back! Same actors, same character names. I love them. Devastated this hasn't had international distribution.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Last of the June Releases

6/26 The Rebound (Thai Weds Gaga) - MeenPing are back in their 3rd BL together, a basketball based romance (Meen was a national basketball player, so yay for that). I like this pair better than most (I still do miss Meen with Est but Est has a fantastic looking new BL coming from GMMTV so yeah...) Anyway I'm up for a sports romance starring a man who, yah know, actually played that sport so... I'm game (pun intended).

6/26 I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) 10 eps - A new series adaptation of beloved yaoi I Hear the Sunspot (first adaptation was feature film Silhouette of Your Voice 2017).

6/30 The Trainee (Thailand Sun YouTube) 12 eps- office romance between a boss/employee featuring OffGun. Taking over Boo's spot for GMMTV.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Lip touch! So sexy. So rare from Korea. Blue Boys.

I do love a meta call out moment.

Tiny idiots (affectionate)

Love their kisses. Such a great side couple.

All Wandee.

(Last week)

QUICK NOTE: I'm flying international back next weekend and the damn thing is gonna take like 72 hours or whatever insanity. Needless to say, I may not get to this round-up for ages. So don't panic, I'm not dead just sleeping.

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in it's infinite wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

There's these tricks, remember.

[sadesluvr]

Guilty - William Afton x Reader

To be a lawyer is to adhere to a strict code of ethics.

A/N: Slight AU, but not really. This is kind of tame compared to other William fics I have planned, but I thought it’d be fun to make Reader more dominant and less innocent than usual! This has a bit of build up, but it pays off ofc ;) You can imagine William to be in his 40s/50s like he is in the movie, or 30s as he would’ve been during his killing spree.

Word count: 2.6K

Tags: SMUT / Age gaps (Reader is in her 20s) / Sexual tension / Hybristophilia / Power play (Kinda) / Fearplay (If you squint) / Clothed sex / Unprotected sex / Mutual consent / Dirty talk / Discussion of murder / Mentions of cheating

Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza was in a mess. A bunch of children had just gone missing - presumed dead - and there were even rumblings of a lawsuit from the victims’ families. It certainly wasn’t the case an up-and-coming lawyer usually received, but had the potential to be the one that cemented your career.

“I must say, I’m rather surprised you chose me to help you out,” you said to the man who was sitting at the table as you closed the door behind you. Your office was by no means large, but it was sizable enough to make you feel important.

“Why’s that?” He asked, cocking his head, his brows raising above the rims of his glasses. You’d done your pre reading; the man’s name was William Afton, a humble businessman who’d started the pizzeria and had come to you for help. He seemed well meaning enough.

“Well,” you began, adjusting your skirt as you sat down, “I’m not the typical face you’d imagine when picturing a bloodthirsty lawyer. Especially someone like you…”You said carefully. It was no secret that men either overlooked you, or went out of their way to hire you for your ‘assets’. “I find they’re usually set in their ways about having a woman deal with their issues,”

The man shrugged, a small smirk creeping to the side of his face. 

“Doesn’t bother me. I have a daughter of my own,”

“Oh,” you smiled, pushing your chair in as you fixed the paperwork around you. “Is she…?”

“She’s a little younger than you,” he said simply. “I make it a mission to practise what I preach at home,”

You smiled, and he smiled back, his skin wrinkling ever so slightly around his eyes and sides of his mouth. He was put together and certainly likeable; only driving you to want to help him out even more. you were quite comfortable, which was good as it was likely that the rest of the office, bar the receptionist and the interns, would file out over time, leaving you alone with him in your assigned wing.

“I suppose we should get started. First — Would you like a cup of coffee?”

/

“…In conclusion, I suggest you speak to this PR rep, he’s excellent,” you said, sliding a card across the table. “For now, our plan is to go ahead with the statement, and hold off on any retaliation,” you continued, making a few notes as you did. “Cooperate with the police, and let me handle things — But, if there’s anything I should know, it’s best you tell me…” you finished, looking up at him from across the table, your eyes meeting his own blue ones.

William smirked. His focus on the task had dwindled in and out over the past hour and a half, having watched the way you explained things with striking confidence, yet bit your pen childishly before writing things down. He couldn’t help but admire a woman with confidence, and it certainly helped that it wasn’t misplaced. You were good at your job. Perhaps too good.

He wondered how you’d ended up here. Young, attractive, yet closed off in a building with stuffy businessmen on a Friday night. You should’ve been at the club; dressed in your sluttiest attire, making out with random guys whilst you split Margaritas on yourself, eventually taking them back home and fucking their brains off. He wondered if you were the dominant or submissive type; if you liked to take charge and ride in cowgirl position, or into the classic missionary, arms above your head as you moan and whimper for more. You might’ve been good at your job, but it was impossible that you hadn’t fucked any of the seniors in the office during your time. 

More importantly, he wondered if you’d ever slept with your clients. After all, it wasn’t as if they were in his calibre; likely some shady businessmen who’d moved a few pots of money around, or middle-aged men moaning about real estate - none notable enough to ruin your reputation.

This was much different. Far different.

You didn’t know it, but you were face to face with a killer.

“Such as?” he hummed. Of course he knew what you meant, but he just wanted to hear you say it.

“…Anything that could damage your validity should there be a trial,” you said, sitting back in your seat. “Forged bank documents, hoarding evidence, an admission of guilt…”

“You think I had something to do with it?”

You paused, somewhat taken aback by how abrupt he was. Usually people reacted dramatically to accusations (especially ones as callous as this), and yet he was eerily calm, barely even flinching at the mention. It intrigued you, but more disturbingly it made you horny.

“I never said that,” you shrugged, trying to compose yourself. “But, if you did, it could change this situation entirely. Your wife, your daughter - the public - will look at you very differently,”

William chuckled, his leg beginning to bounce in excitement. The mention of his family was quite the mood killer, and yet you acknowledging them turned him on. They weren’t really any more than tools to look like a convincing family-friendly businessman, and yet you seemingly bought into it. In terms of the public, well, he had a big ego for sure, but his libido was bigger. Throbbing, even.

“And what about you?” He said, leaning in and placing his hands under his chin, grinning at the way you shifted under his gaze. It was time to turn the tables.

“Excuse me?” you choked, an uncomfortable feeling beginning to churn in your stomach. There was something in the way that he smiled at you, like he was getting some kind of satisfaction from making you squirm. Perhaps you’d been wrong about him. Perhaps there was something deeper. 

“Will you look at me any differently?” he insisted. You paused for a moment before shaking your head. 

“Absolutely not, Mr Afton. It’s my duty to be impartial,”

So prim and proper. It was time to blur the boundaries.

“Tch,” he scoffed before bursting into laughter. “Come on! That’s what they all say. It’s human nature to judge,”

You rolled your eyes, tossing your leg over the other as you began to drum your fingertips on your desk impatiently. This was usually the part where whoever you were talking to stopped to talk down to you. William could tell you were agitated, and he loved the way your brows were beginning to furrow and lips scrunch into a pout. He wondered how they tasted. Much more how they felt.

“It’s also human nature to feel discomfort when running over time,” you snapped, closing your files with haste. “This session is over, Mr Afton,”

So feisty. Repression had clearly done a number on you.

It was a blatant sign for him to move on, and yet he remained firmly in his seat, watching as you got up to put your files away, skirt slightly crumpled around your legs from how long you’d been sitting. You noticed this and pulled it down, turning to face the man yet again and leaning over the table, palms flat as you rested your hands on either side. 

You were rather close to him, and if anyone walked in it would seem sketchy. It didn’t help that he was quite handsome; with rugged yet refined features, a slowly greying goatee and bright eyes that were somewhat hidden by his large glasses. The longer that you stared at him, the more you felt weakened under his gaze.

“Can I help you, Mr Afton?”

“You can,” he said, and you raised a brow for him to continue. He felt his cock begin to harden and heart beat as he worked his way up to the moment. Yes, you were a lawyer, but the circumstances meant that you were game to react rather abruptly.

A killer and a lawyer in an empty wing, just after hours - doors shut with no one to hear a scream? It was the perfect scenario for a crime.

“I have something to declare…” he began, and he could barely contain his smile as you raised your brows, mouth slowly falling agape and body subtly recoiling. As if in a trance, you lowered your head further, the eye contact so intense that you could feel a tingle throughout each others’ bodies. You were 90% certain he could hear your heart pounding in your chest.

“…Go on,”

“I think you know what it is,” 

With a slow blink, as you tried to ground yourself. You could’ve vomited. In your eyes, murder was a grey area in the realm of self defence, but children were always off limits. 

He didn’t even seem to care. He seemed amused, actually. 

“O-Okay,” you whispered, swallowing a lump in your throat. “Thank you for telling me. I’ll have to revisit this with fresh eyes in the morning —“

You were so painfully uncomfortable, and yet part of you was aroused. Perhaps it was because you’d never encountered an actual killer, or it was because you were incredibly aware of the blatant fantasy being played out from both sides. He was a wolf; a hunter, bigger and stronger than you and waiting to ravish you like prey. 

You were dedicated to holding up the law, fighting for what was fair like a good girl, but sometimes good girls needed to be ravished.

“— What do you think, Miss L/N?” he teased, standing up to match you. “Am I a dead man?”

“No…” you whispered. “I’m going to do what I can…”

“Good,” he smiled, backing away from the desk, the outline of his bulge illuminated from the dimming lights. “That’s why I chose you,”

You gave an awkward nod, haphazardly rushing to hold the door open for him to leave. You held your head down as he passed, and squeezed your eyes shut as you realised he’d stopped in front of you. 

Your bodies were painfully close in the tiny doorway. William grinned, and he knew he had you from the moment you looked up at him through your lashes.

“…Are you going to kill me?”

“Not unless you want me to,”

Your lips were on each other in a heartbeat, your hands immediately finding the door and slamming it shut before focusing your attention on the killer at your feet. He wasted no time in effortlessly hoisting you up around his waist, his large hands firm on your hips and thighs as he held you steady, stumbling to find your desk. You returned the favour by holding onto his neck and beginning to grind yourself against his cock, your skirt riding up in the process.

“I bet you’re real happy I walked through those doors, aren’t you?” He teased. “How long have you been waiting for a fucked up guy like me, hmm?” he said, crudely sticking his fingers inside your panties as he placed you on the desk. He grunted at the sensation of your wet heat, hungry as he stuck a third finger inside without warning or hesitation. They were lithe and calloused, and seemed to hit your core immediately upon penetration, causing you to let out a moan. 

“I never –” you began, barely unable to form a sentence. “This is nothing —” you insisted, lips leaving his own as you began to fumble with his belt, cupping him through his pants. He was painfully hard. And big. Bigger than most guys your age. “— Just a formality,”

William scoffed, unable to hide his lascivious smile as he began pumping in and out of you, your lips swallowing him to just below his knuckles. Against the creaking of the desk and desperate pants you could hear the wet sound of your juices coating his fingers, sticky and copious as his motions continued; rough yet controlled. 

To think, they were the same hands that had murdered all those kids…

You’d taken out his cock now and was massaging the organ in your hands, causing him to hollow out his cheeks, sighing at the contact. It was over five inches, and considerably thick, with a long blue vein running along its underside. As you stroked him, a healthy secretion of precum coated your fingers, indirectly lubing him up further. His thrusts were lazy but needy as he fucked your hand, and with every movement you worked together to guide his cock to your entrance, his bulging tip teasing your folds.

“Fuck,” he whispered, throwing his head back. “You’re ready for me, aren’t you? Naughty girl, you know this goes against your ‘ethics’...” he teased again, and you could barely formulate an answer as his body was now almost completely on top of yours, your back arching as you stabilised yourself with your free hand on the desk.

He chuckled, reaching down to grip the base of his cock as he lined himself at your entrance. For a moment your hands touched, and the excessive hairs and slight wrinkles reminded you of just how much older he was.

“Fuck ethics,” you moaned, and his grin deepened, to the point he was baring teeth. You couldn’t take it anymore, and you were beginning to lose your grip on your panties as you held them to the side.

Next time he should just rip them off.

“William…” you moaned. “Please…”

“Since you asked so nicely,” he laughed, and thrust himself into you, rutting into you like a rabbit. To him the sensation was euphoric, it had been a long time since he’d fucked a fresh pussy, and admittedly his wife was getting rather stale. You were so tight and melded perfectly around him, but most of all you were eager, even if your morals were blatantly backwards. 

William’s cock filled you completely, repeatedly hitting the untouched crevices of your cunt that you hadn’t even known existed. He was big, skilled and oh-so painfully perfect - Perfectly bad for you. You could get disbarred, your public reputation ruined, much like the narrative of the man inside you - but with every thrust that drew deeper into your pussy and lustful kiss to your neck and lips none of it seemed to matter. His large hands cupped your sides, moving between your breasts and thighs as he groped and massaged; most importantly making sure that you remained spread wide and available for him as his clothed thighs hit against yours repeatedly. You were high; so high that you barely acknowledged the wedding ring on his left finger, even if you could feel it through the thin material of your blouse.

“You feel so fucking good,” he grunted. “I haven’t fucked a pussy like this in ages. You and I are gonna make such a good team — Ugh — I knew there was a reason I chose you…”

“Fuck…” you groaned. “W-William…”

“Does it bother you that I hurt those kids?” he snarled, beginning to feel his stomach knot up. 

You were too lost in your ecstasy to answer. 

Did it?

“…Tut, tut. You said you wouldn’t judge me, sweetheart,” he chided. “We were getting along so well…”

“We are. I’m gonna help you,” you said determinedly, eyes unable to shift from his own. You were close.

“I know you are,” he hummed, letting out an intermittent groan as he shut his eyes. “You have no choice. You’re just as guilty as me,”

There was something about those words that immediately sent you over the edge, squeezing your eyes shut and letting out a pornographic moan as you came, your body twinging as the man held your thighs apart, making sure you felt every inch of your shared ecstasy. William had barely found it in him to pull out on time, his heavy load painting a mess on your panties and thighs, but leaving a small trail of cum along the outer lips of your pussy, a subtle but telling reminder of what had happened.

Fixing your crumpled shirt and skirt, you adjusted yourself before hopping off of the desk, hands clasped in front of you. 

“So,” you said, clearing your throat. You were surprised it wasn’t sore from your incessant moans. “I’d like to see you at the same time tomorrow. We’ve got a lot of ground to cover.”

@yellowbunnydreams @lonelyaxolotl13

[sunflowerandstrawberryspice]

CARMEN SANDIEGO? In 2024? It's more likely thank you think! Please excuse the shit quality for some reason I wasn't allowed to upload the normal pdf and I had to upload a fucking screenshot???

So my friend convinced me to watch Carmen Sandiego and since he's watching ALL of Ninjago for me I thought it was the least I could do to watch four season of a show with a pretty decent concept but uh... yeesh, don't get me wrong the show is really fun but lord have mercy does it have problems especially the last two seasons which were just so wildly disappointing to me. It went from a show with an interesting look on morals to pure pro-cop and mostly black and white thinking so quick (that not mentioning the breaking up a found family full of people with abandonment issues) it was honestly just so disappointing so me and the friend who introduced it to me decided to rewrite it! (I will not be animating nor do I plan on doing more than MAYBE a comic or art piece here and there because my chronic pain ridden ass can not handle that much lol)

The main goals are to:

1) Flesh out characters that aren't Carmen and actually give them reactions based on their lived experiences and how they might realistically react instead of what the show needed to move the plot along

2) Having characters other than Carmen be actually relevant to the plot the main one being Chase Devineaux who we're gonna kind of have as a parallel to Carmen (trust me yall) as kind of a "What if Carmen didn't have her friends/family to ground her and fall back on" but for all the Chase fans out there (gods I hope there's some other than me) he will be getting a happy ending but bro is getting put through the RINGER first

3) Have both A.C.M.E (now standing for Administration for Containing and Monitoring Evil) and V.I.L.E be the bad guys. Also just as an extra bit of fun we're making VILE a full blown cult, they were very cult like in the show so we're just gonna make it one. Both are going to be very morally questionable and while it'll take a bit longer for ACME to show it's true colors don't you worry they definitely will ;)

4) We're doing canonical lgbtq+ rep, I know the show teased a lot of relationships and really only gave yall background gays not to say thats bad but we can do better than just a brief shot of a damn taco truck. I mean like come on in a story about a young woman going against the government for the greater good why not put some rep into it ya know!

5) We're making it light sci-fi, not like SUPER high tech but definitely beyond what we've got currently, as shown with Carmen's prosthetic, and don't worry I'm doing my research as a disabled person I know how it feels to be misrepresented or ignored so I want to make sure I'm being realistic

6) PLAYER ISN'T GOING TO BE A CHILD! I don't know if this bothered anybody else but to me it was really weird that this 16 year old's only friends were in their 20s!

Alright I think that's what I'm gonna say for now, I'd love it if yall tuned in for updates if your curious since this is a passion project for me and my friend and we're having a blast writing it!

As always I am still working on stuff for Ninjago cause I could never abandon my one true love, currently there's a Pixal drawing in progress (it's giving me hell T-T) something for Cole and Geo, and something of Sora MAYBE even Euphrasia if I'm feeling up to it.

Having said that I hope yall have a great day/night and PEACE OUT!

[maxrowave]

GENDERBEND RAHHHHHH

i love drarry and i love women so put it together and you get this, i present to you: Harphine

Harry is consequently now named Harley; Draco is also now named Delphine (Full name Delphinus Lucius Malfoy, however asks to be referred to as Delphine because it's pretty). I decided to keep everyone else the same because the world centres around them. Delphine is the ultimate coquette girl, lana del rey wishes she could be as coquette as her. Mega popular girl and a trendsetter, one day she wears a headband to school, the next day, half the female students are as well. Extreme closet gay, internalised homophobia...

Harley on the other hand is a major tom-boy, as a toddler and young childhood she probably had a buzzcut or short hair because her hair was too much maintenance for the Dursley's. She also wore Dudley's old clothes so she was mistaken for a boy for most of her young life, she only began to grow it out when she started attending Hogwarts and got a major glow-up in third year. and now the multitude of headcanons: 1) Delphine resorts to flirting to get her way with male students, however it is only by accident does Harley discover Delphine is prudent when she flirts with her. Delphine immediately goes red, sputtering incoherently:

"MY FATHER WILL HEAR OF THIS!!!" "good, I'm glad he knows about me so it won’t be as awkward to meet him when I'm over for dinner"

Harley uses this to her advantage and begins to spread rumours about Delphine to finally get back at her for all these years 'Pure Blood Delphine Malfoy, sole heir, is a homosexual?!' It gets out of hand and Delphine's rep gets ruined or somethin

2) Harley is a bit of an artist, she likes drawing/doodling. One day she's sitting in potions class, not listening because fuck that, idly drawing on her parchment without much thought, only for her to realise that hey... this kind of looks like Delphine, and then realising she's just been drawing Delphine in various sitting poses for the past half an hour.

3) Even though Harley really hates Delphine, she has to admit, she's really fucking gorgeous, and in an odd way Harley kind of admires how put together she is. Harley does try to imitate her makeup one day because she wants to know how it feels to be pretty/put together, it turns out shite, Ron laughs at her, Harley beats him up; Delphine also laughs at her. But when they do become good friends, like fifth year or so, Delphine does do her makeup (imagine that one img of the girl on top of the other doing her eyeshadow, that's them).

3.5) Slight extension from the previous one, I mentioned this on my xwitter awhile back -- Harry purposely messes up his tie so Draco can fix it, because Draco's love language is to clean up people, i.e brushing lint off their shoulder, adjusting their collar, kind of like a cat. In this genderbent au, Harley messes up her lipstick everytime so Delphine can redo it.

4) Delphine is a massive closeted lesbian, and is pining for Harley in her own odd way. When they begin to get close, Delphine instictually reels back, because she's used to playing hard-to-get with other guys as a flirting method. She doesn't quite register that it doesn't work with girls, which leaves Harley wondering what she did wrong and why Delphine isn't as interested.

5) When they do finally get into a relationship, most likely like sixth/seventh year, it's very low-key and secretive because Delphine still has internalised homophobia/closeted. But Lucius ends up arranging her marriage because she's an only child and a female to the Malfoy name. What happens next is idk

6) Lucius either dotes on Delphine like a child who is in constant need of being helped and cannot be independent, or never speaks to her ever because he's disappointed he has a daughter.

OKAY THATS IT, I HAVE MORE HEADCANONS THAT I WILL POUR IF ENOUGH ASK FOR IT LOL... i wanna see if I can make Harphine their genderbend ship name, it's cute

also boobs bc im gay and so are they

[smallvictorianchildwhofoundwifi]

Long ass story, the post finally arrives! @the-copycat-hero

On the same road that a young boy takes on their way to his friend's house is a hospital. A hospital that is always busy with someone to help, so busy that the people occupying their rooms tend to blur together.

And even in the absence of the boy and the house that gave a roof to the wonderful family of the boy's friend, the hospital still stood on that road. The hospital with so many rooms, one couldn't count them without getting mixed up and turned around.

But in the mix of madness, hidden in the blur of the patients, was room 4307. The room that held a great tragedy and a great miracle of one person experienced and seen by no one before.

When passing by room 4307, the voices of several teenaged students could be heard.

A knock on the room door grabbed the attention of the three students, and the door opened to reveal a familiar scruffy man, with the most droopy red eye, constant annoyed expression, and long black hair to frame his face, perfectly signaling his "do not talk to me" vibe. Except now this man was a caring teacher, checking up on his after-mortem student.

"He should be free to leave in another week, if the doctors decide he's recovering well and it's safe for him to walk, train, study, the whole shebang." Aizawa-sensei answered the question the students hadn't known he'd heard.

"Now," he continued, not waiting for any of them to reply, "I understand you two are worried reps, but Monoma's got a few other visitors today."

Taking the hint, Shoda and Kendo said their goodbyes and exited the hospital room.

Monoma rested his chin on his hand and groaned to the teacher, "You sure know how to clear a room Teach, but they really couldn't have stuck around for a few doctors visits?" Monoma never needed to say just how much he loves his classmates and wants to be with them, but he always pushes sneaks it into a conversation anyways.

"Oh it's not just doctors."

Monoma was confused. The last he checked, none of his classmates were allowed to visit him because of his condition- Kendo and Shoda having special permission that Vlad-sensei fought for under the guise that they're his class reps.

A figure emerged into the doorway that Monoma hadn't realized was still open. A figure of long blonde hair and pale skin, who's dark green eyes were too faraway to be in the body of a caring mother, visiting her living son.

"Neito." She said loud enough so that he could hear with his very limited hearing. It wasn't unnatural to her to speak like that, she had to do the same thing growing up with her mother with the same hearing loss as her son.

But now she had to do it so her son would know she was there, not just what she was saying.

"Oh." is all he could find within him to say. Aizawa looked between the two before leaving with a quick note that he would check on Monoma later.

The woman stood in the doorway for a few moments, looking around the hospital room; the iv, the monitors, and every piece of furniture had more eye contact with her than Monoma did.

"I wasn't expecting you to visit."

The simple sentence struck her out of her stupor, looking at him almost offendedly.

"You've been in the hospital almost a week, after being dead for days. You just fought in a war and are expected to skip back over to school, and you didn't think I would visit?" Her voice raised a little as she continued talking and walked a little closer to his bed.

Monoma thought of 100 things to say to her, none of them nice, but instead he looked back at the doorway with all his might to see the blurry sliding door closed. No one else was expected to enter.

"I see dad isn't with you." Monoma tried to meet his mother's eyes, his words carrying another message: if he can't be bothered to visit, why should I expect you either?

His mother took a sharp inhale and squeezed her eyes shut. "Your father- he..." they both knew she had nothing good to say.

"He has nothing to do with me. I'm so happy you're okay." She said with such tenderness you could believe that it came from a caring mother.

Monoma wanted nothing more that to believe her- she had no reason to lie- but he couldn't stop his stupid mouth from talking. "Yeah I bet you no longer have to worry about fighting over who has to deal with the funeral services."

Monoma couldn't see it, but her face cringed for a moment, just a moment, where she looked guilty.

Despite his blindness, her silence spoke volumes and Monoma knew exactly what that meant.

"You didn't...”

"Neito I-"

YOU SERIOUSLY FOUGHT OVER THAT?! DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW CRAZY THAT IS??"

"I know, but I do care about you Neito- that was just-"

"Oh yes, the love and care I feel." Monoma usually had a better handle on his emotions, but at the moment he really didn't care how he was acting, he just wanted his mother gone.

"I DO-" the woman who was practically foreign to her son stopped as she realized she was shouting, and finally walked up to his bed to cup his face and spoke in a quieter voice.

"I do care about you. I love you so much, and I'm sorry that I haven't been able to make you believe that. And I promise, I will do what I can to make sure you're safe." The emphasis on safe made Monoma nervous.

"What do you mean safe?"

She let go of Monoma and backed up just a little bit, still making eye contact. "I'm taking you out of UA."

Monoma felt his blood run cold and his heart drop. "... what?"

"Neito, look around. Look at you!" She waved her hands around frantically before gesturing at her bedridden son. "Is this really the life you want for yourself? To be getting injured all the time? To die on a battlefield?" Her voice rose the more she spoke and this time she didn't try to lower it.

Monoma didn't know what to think, what to say. All words died in his mouth. When he was a kid, all he wanted was for his parents to pay attention to him, to care about him- and now he was getting that in the worst way possible.

"I am not leaving 1-B." Monoma said slowly

His mother looked aghast. "Those people got you killed and you want to go back?"

"What the hell did you expect when you convinced dad to let me be a hero? Did you think I was just going to sit on my ass-"

"Language, I am your mothe-"

"AND DO nothing!? My life is always going to be on the line. And YOU agreed to that when you let me be a hero."

His mother stared at him for several moments before speaking up again, much quieter than before to where Monoma could barely hear her, "Well I'm taking that back. I'm sorry Neito."

They stood in silence until they heard the door slide open again, a doctor and Aizawa on the other side.

"Pardon us," the doctor said, "Are we interrupting?"

Monoma's mother quickly broke eye contact with her son to address the doctor, "No, I was just about to head out. Pardon me if I stole important time from you doctor.”

"Oh you can stay if you’d like, it's just a check up and typically parents stay with their kids during these." The doctor clearly didn't understand the situation.

"It's just a check up right? She doesn't need to stay." Monoma stared back at his mother with a look telling her to get out.

Before she left she announced, "I'll be back tomorrow." And left with a nod.

Aizawa eyed her until she was out of sight and snapped his attention to Monoma, but said nothing.

The next day, true to her promise, "Mrs." Monoma made her way into the hospital that her son had been staying at for the past week and a half.

Her heels clacked on the tile floor as she started to make her way up to his room before hearing a man's voice from behind her.

"Ah, Mrs. Monoma."

She turned around to find the owner of the voice was the scroungy man who was next to the doctor yesterday. A teacher, she remembered, but his name...

"Hello. You're one of Neito's teachers, yes?" She didn't bother with reaching out a hand to shake, she didn't want to formalize with a man who helped kill her son.

"Aizawa Shouta, Mrs. Monoma. We haven't properly met."

"Well, now we have. If you don't mind me, I'm going to visit my son- who is hospitalized." Monoma said shortly, a soupcon of resentment in her voice, as she turned around and started to walk away.

Aizawa didn't try to stop her but continued talking. "Your son is actually a topic I wanted to discuss with you. We've been informed that you plan to remove him from the hero course and UA entirely, whether he wants it or not."

Monoma stopped in her tracks and whipped around, "Yes well, sometimes people make decisions for others without asking their permission. It's how things get done." She slowly walked towards the audacious man, her voice etched with discontent. "It's what UA saw fit to do when they shipped off our children to war with little regard on if they'd come home to us."

The mother stood in front of Aizawa with a face of anger and her voice a threatening whisper, “Now you may see my actions as paranoid, or stringent, but I am doing what is best for him and one day he will understand that. It doesn’t have to be tomorrow or next week, but this is the decision I have made and he will just have to deal with it.”

Aizawa understood where she was coming from. The hero commission demanded that everyone with a hero license were to fight, and no parents were made aware of this in case there was an uproar in reaction. Illogical, in his opinion- and look how that decision landed.

But as much as Aizawa understood and agreed with this mother's anger, he came here for a reason. "I completely understand your decision. However, your son loves being at this school, and being with his classmates. His homeroom teacher has reported that he's been much happier as the school year went on and Neito finds a lot of comfort in his friends here. If you were to take him out-"

"YOU GET NO SAY IN WHAT IS GOOD FOR MY SON'S WELLBEING." Monoma suddenly shouted as she stuck an accusative finger in Aizawa's chest, "BECAUSE OF YOUR IDEA OF "SUPERVISION", NEITO IS STUCK IN A HOSPITAL BED FOR THREE WEEKS. HE HAS A DEATH CERTIFICATE. I WOULD RATHER NEITO HAVE A LIFE AWAY FROM UA THAN NO LIFE AT ALL." She took in a shaky breath and lowered her arm to her side, body tense and unmoving.

The air was thick as silence followed the mother's shouts. Then suddenly, Aizawa lowered his body in a bow and spoke in acquiesce.

"You're right. It was my job to keep your son safe and I failed. Because of my failure as a hero and a caretaker- you, your son, and all his classmates have gone through a terrible experience and I cannot offer enough condolences and apologies to erase your pain, as much as I wish I could." Aizawa paused for a moment, clearly pensive and radiating sorrow. He kept his bow low and respectful and took a deep breath before making his request, "But despite what has happened, Neito still wishes to be a hero. He wants to continue his educational journey here at UA, and he wants to continue his life alongside his friends in class 2-B."

"So please, do not take away Neito's dream because of our shortcomings."

Monoma looked at the pleading teacher as if she had been turned upside-down. Working her entire career in the modeling industry and then at her husbands company, an actual remorseful apology was rare, and was certainly not expected from the "heroes" entrusted with her son's life and had messed up horrendously. She felt ambivalent staring at this man with an eye patch and a metal leg, realizing that those are from trying. This man had truly tried to protect her son and might have even given his life to protect him.

But all she could think was her son having the same fate- missing limbs and appendages, failing to save people and feeling sorrow and despair. Her heart wouldn't be able to take that.

"I can't... I can't do that to myself, or my son." She spoke slowly and low, her voice thick. "Have a good day." A clear end to the conversation and Aizawa watched as the woman turned and walked away, making her way to her son's hospital room.

As Mrs Monoma started to open the hospital door, she stopped at the sound of two distressed teenage shouts coming from the room.

"WHAT?!"

Through the small opening she had made through the door, she watched a short, round faced boy with light blue hair and a taller muscular redhead girl converse with Neito.

"She's taking you out of UA?" The boy said.

"She can't do that- I mean, this has been your dream for years and-" the distressed girl spoke quickly but Neito managed to cut her off.

"I know..." He held his hand up to motion the girl to stop, "But I don't think there's anything I can do. She sounded pretty ready to take me out."

Seeing the dejected look on Neito's face made his mother so upset to see. She knew that he didn't like this decision but that's what is best for him... right?

The boy sat down on one of the chairs next to the hospital bed and sat in thought, his eyebrows knit together. "And you're sure there's no way of convincing her?"

Neito's voice broke as he spoke, "I... I don't know." He brought his legs towards his chest, something the doctors definitely wouldn't approve but Neito showed no pain.

The redhead girl gripped onto the end of the bed and was practically shaking in anger. "Why does she care?" She whispered.

Mrs Monoma felt offended by the outrageous question, but there was something tugging on the back of her mind, a blurry memory of someone with red hair.

The round faced boy looked at the girl like she was suddenly someone unfamiliar.

"Well, any worried parent might do this, we should've expected it. I mean," he let out a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood, "I'm surprised Midoriya's still enrolled."

"But it's not like she's ever cared before." The girl let out an aggravated breath, "Now she just- appears out of nowhere and-"

"Kendo." The boy interrupted, "there's no point in getting all mad over it, Monoma's the only one who gets a say in what to do."

At the mention of the girl's name, the memory snapped to the front of her mind, and Mrs Monoma remembered a little redhead girl at her door, along with an older boy who looked similar to the girl, saying she was Neito's friend. The boy introduced the two of them as the Kendo's who lived a few blocks away.

Neito, still curled in on himself, just shrugged and mumbled something.

This "Kendo" seemed to have heard him and suddenly reached out her hands and held his face- much more aggressively than Mrs Monoma recalled having done just the day before, but Neito looked less tense with her. No, not quite "less tense", he was just comfortable. Comfortable with her, and not his own mother.

"No-" Kendo started, "no it is not okay, and we are not going to let her take you out of UA."

"But what-" he started to argue.

"You love it here don't you?" The girl interrupted. Neito stared at her for a second, surprised by the question, before letting out a small 'yeah'. "Then we are not going to let her take you out."

The hidden mother sucked in a small breath at that. How could he love it there? Regardless of any happy memories, they had gotten him killed. They couldn't guarantee his safety anymor-

They already couldn't guarantee his safety for a while.

She remembered hearing about the USJ attack, and when they were attacked at camp. She'd thought about how dangerous it was, and glad that Neito was okay, but she'd never thought to take him out over it. She barely even thought to call. She didn't care when they insisted on housing him- and all the other students.

UA had been a danger for a long time- all the more reason to take him out now.

The girl was half on the bed after reaching out to Neito, but was too focused on his face to notice or move, "You have wanted to be a hero for YEARS, and I won't let anyone take that dream from you, you hear me?"

The other boy spoke up as well, "Yeah, we'll all be right there with you, just give us the word."

Neito looked between his two classmates and his eyes became glossy. Kendo noticed and crawled on the bed to hug him.

The moment was silent as the two sat on the bed in a tight hug before Neito whispered:

"I like being at UA."

"I know Monoma."

"I don't want to leave."

"I know, we won't let you."

"I don't want to change my life, I like it now."

Kendo said nothing but squeezed him tighter.

...

....

"I don't want to change" the words rung in her ears. The woman behind the door felt as if she couldn't breathe, breath became irrelevant, unimportant to the mind of this woman. "I don't want to change," how many times had those words echoed in her head in passing thought. How many hours had she stayed in bed, wishing she hadn't changed herself for a faux man, who spoke empty promises. How many years of her life was wasted away because she allowed others to decide her life.

Hiromi no longer felt that she was standing on a hospital floor, or that she was standing at all. Everything felt lost, that she was floating in everything her life was, floating in nothing.

Hiromi? When was she last called her name. She wasn't Hiromi anymore, she was a Monoma. That's who she had been for the last 17 years of her life. That's all she was.

Is this how Neito would feel when he was in his adult years? Had he already reached his adult years? He just fought in a war, did he really still feel like a child? Could he?

Mrs. Monoma found herself sitting on the floor, clutching onto the chair next to her, but she couldn't feel the grip, couldn't feel the cool tile floors. She couldn't feel anything. Everything was lost- her life was lost, the man she fell in love with was lost, her son was lost, her beautiful sister was lost, the wedding of her dreams was lost, the cozy home she dreamed of filled with laugher and love was lost, what else? What else was ripped away from her, what else had she chosen to throw away in exchange for a life she didn't want, hadn't desired. When had this happened.

She felt as if she turned around and everything was suddenly gone. But she knew it wasn't true, she could feel the pathway of her life crumbling as she walked for years. She's cried so many nights as she felt the unsteady cracks catch at her heels and make her trip, scratches and bruises appearing in every single place, later replaced by scars, scars replacing every single part of her, leaving her nothing of the same person she once was, the giddy and ebullient woman who loved the world despite it's battles. She was now cold and emotionless, broken by the world, by her world, and breaking everything else in the process.

And yet still she walked, on a cracking, breaking, spiraling road, because what else is she supposed to do? What other road is there to go? There's nothing left, every other road she had was destroyed with her own hands till nothing else was left, nothing to fix the road, nothing to know the road even existed, except maybe a shared name or a picture, but even those are cracked and freyed, erased and thrown out.

Over the years she worked and worked, trying to appease her in-laws, trying to wash out her emotions and everything she loved in order to be taken more seriously. And for what? To become "Mrs Monoma"? "Mrs" "Monoma". That's all she was, a Monoma wife. A wife to that slimy, stinking, rotten man that can't even stick up for his WIFE, the woman he CHOSE to love, chose to MARRY- instead it was left up to her to to go against those foul people, and look how good she was at that. Left with a son she didn't want, a house she didn't want, a job she didn't want, a husband she didn't want, a title she didn't want- a "Mrs. Monoma"

Mrs Monoma

"Mrs." "Mrs." "Mrs." Was all they ever called her.

What about Hiromi? When was the last time someone ever called her by her name? When was the last time she talked to someone who called her that?

"Mrs." Oh it was all she ever heard anymore, "Mrs" "Mrs" "Mrs-

"Miss?!" Hiromi felt someone gently grab her shoulders and lightly shake her, knocking her out of her stupor.

Suddenly she could feel the cool tile floor underneath her, the grip her hand had on the chair next to her. It felt as if all of her senses came back in an instant and immediately short circuited, the lights blinding her, the ringing sound in her ears making it hard to hear what the nurse next to her was saying.

Hiromi's eyes focused on the woman and let her ears slowly stop ringing to let the nurse's voice into her head.

"Ma'am are you alright?"

"Ah, yes yes I'm fine." Hiromi put a hand on her head as if suffering a headache. "Got lightheaded for a moment is all."

"We should get you some place to lay down and some water." The kind nurse helped her up but Hiromi stepped away from her.

"Oh no I'm quite fine now, I'm just visiting my son and I'll be leaving."

The nurse knit her brows together and cautiously reached for the woman's arm. "It's dangerous to shrug off dizzy spells, do you have them frequently?"

Hiromi could recall a few after a good many hours of staring at her computer screen, or working long hours of calls, meetings, reviewing products, writing papers, and other grueling tasks- but those were caused by overworking herself. This was fine, she was fine.

"No, I don't, I am completely fine. Thank you." She began to reach for the door next to her as the nurse continued to reach for her arm, when the door suddenly opened and two high school students were on the other end.

"Oh." Kendo stared Mrs. Monoma with no attempt to hide her surprise that the woman has visited.

Hiromi knew there were many things she should say to this girl, many apologies and many thanks. But at the moment, she didn't care to do any of it; she walked past the two children and walked right for Neito.

"Miss I really do think you should sit down-" the nurse shouted but Hiromi didn't care. She kept walking towards her son and reached her arms out surround him in a stuffing hug. Probably the fist hug she's given him since he got into UA.

Neito squeaked at suddenly getting pulled into a hug, especially since he had no idea what was happening, having little vision and little hearing. But he was a smart one, from what little he heard, what he could feel, and who had yet to visit him, Neito could reasonably deduce that it was his mother hugging him.

Reasonably.

But… why was she hugging him? Monoma tried to look over where his mother had stomped over from to gain some context.

He could see a blurry figure that looked unlike his classmates walk closer and speak loud enough that he could hear her worried tone, before she suddenly stopped as Monoma could feel his mother say something, although his head was swimming so much he couldn't discern what it was.

The arms around him squeezed him tighter for a moment and Monoma could hear his mother's voice.

"I'm sorry."

Monoma could barely understand his mother. He could hear her, but what she said made no sense. Why was she apologizing? What stirred her so much that she was apologizing?

His thoughts cut off when he heard a sniffle, and his mother moved a hand to hold his head.

"I'm sorry." She said again but in a much wobblier voice.

It felt like had time stopped, the two stuck there like statues- unmoving and unbound by time. The only movement was Monoma shifting a hand to complete the hug. He held his mother and he held on tight: an action he had wanted to do for so long.

Monoma felt like a child, holding onto his mom as she hugged him tight. It felt childish to admit that the whole time he had been cooped up in the hospital, a small piece of him wanted to hug his mother. It felt dumb too.

Neito was never close with either of his parents, his mom felt estranged to him. But in that moment everything felt...

Right. Like two pieces of a puzzle finally connected. Neito wanted nothing more than to just stay there with his mom. For a moment, for a year, for forever- it didn't matter- he just wanted to stay right there.

[inkyquince]

please inky, continue w your thought about ex-husbands and divorce.. pleaseee expand omfg your mind is so big i just wanna chomp on it 😞

ASJODDJAIJS

characters. Avery. Remy. Bailey. (Degrees of Lewdity)

yeah, so content warning, toxic behaviour, mention of sex after some wine so that's hinted to be dubcon as hell, angst, especially with mister Hay Bales. also bailey's section has a shit ton of coercion, and its implied reader is remarried.

okay, so camp "I signed, but I'm mad now" of divorced husband is very much Avery, Remy, Bailey vibes.

So, Avery didn't MEAN to sign the papers. He was just so fucking seething that he did it out of spite. Fucking throwing the papers at you and tells you to get the fuck out of his house. What I love about Avery, at any moment, he could be in either camp, ngl. Either he'd fight for his reputation, and would never even let you show him the papers, or you get him so riled up, he does it out of pure anger and wanting revenge.

Anyways, his rep does take a blow, but he doesn't care, mans is running off pure spite for the entirety of the divorce proceedings. The moment he realises he needs to pay alimony? Wishes that he could go over to you and throttle you.

But when that anger simmers down? When he's gotten his fill of booze, whore and spite?

Mans is fucking LONELY. He's still angry, but its just general anger at the situation. Look, if you were still an orphan, he'd just get a new sugar baby. Who give a shit. Yeah, it undoes the work he did on you and he doesn't look as forward to date nights as he did, but this is different. You were his spouse. His ex-spouse now, but his spouse. He bared his fucking soul to you. You two had a good fucking life. Just had a few issues he refused to look at. You two were the perfect couople in the town's eyes, how would they have reacted to you two going to counselling?

It's too late though. He swings widly between being a fucking monster of an ex, forcing you to go back to the house to "pick up some stuff" and telling the town that you cheated on him, that's why you two divorced, to sending you gifts on your anniversary and your birthday. Phones you at night, and his voice is so low and sweet, and murmuring that he misses you.

Worse than Avery? Remy.

Remy is the rich bitch town icon that Avery wishes he was. He has you sign a prenup, then you get to live his fucking wealthy ass life. He's a cold ass fucker, so when you want to work on the marriage, he snidely mentions if you don't like it, leave him. Then he's shocked-face when you do. Then to get back at you, he's the one who gets the divorce papers. To get back at him, you sign them. To get back at you, he signs them. To get back at him, you file them.

To get back at you, motherfucker makes sure you get nothing from him in the divorce.

After all the stupid ass shit he pulls, he's fucking annoyed now. You were his other half, the only person he'd ever kneel down for. So, he's a frigid little bitch of an ex husband. But he's also such a fucker.

Like, he's will be so aloof and cold with you, and then idly offer a glass of wine to share when you have to come over to sign for some stuff. Evening ends with him three fingers deep in you, stroking you the way you like it, sucking at your neck greedily.

The treatment he gives you, when its just the two of you, is like the shiny red apple he would hold up to your lips. This is what you could have. But his behaviour away from those times is the stick. This is what you get for leaving him. Trying to usher you back into the estate and spread your legs for him, and only him again.

Bailey? Bailey. Bailey gives the vibes that you two married very young. When there was a spark of hope, and with very few good things in his life, he made sure to put a ring on the one thing that did.

However, he changes over time, becoming the ruthless caretaker of the orphanage, a terrifying criminal, and a worse man. You weren't a soft spot, you were a vulnerable one. Bailey would have had to have some sort of gentleness to him if you were a soft spot. You were a weakness, an achilles heel had had to smother and keep hiddden.

And sadly, that is no way to live.

So seperation. Then divorce. Then he doesn't show up to the court appointment. He pays alimony. He doesn't blink at anything, just takes it in stride, sometimes sneering at you.

But he isn't explosive. He isn't cold. He's just Bailey.

You see him once a month, coming to deliver your half of the money each time. You doubt it's just to see you again, even when you move on with your life and he stays in the orphanage you two always used to hate, and plan to escape from. Maybe its because he enjoys the looks the bankers give you when you have to pull out a shit ton of ironed out bills, taken from his orphans' hands, and put directly into yours.

But, you're still his. Your life hasn't changed at all from when you two were together. The only difference is that he no longer spends two or three nights sleeping next to you anymore.

Because you can't say no to Bailey.

You could be wearing a wedding ring, you could be tired from staying up with your baby, you could be so far into a new, happier life, but it doesn't matter. He doesn't trust whores, paid or not, he hates clubbing, and even with the most tender of sore spots, all they need it a slow, gentle massage.

So you have to drop everything for him. He doesn't give a shit what you could be doing. Bailey has an ache that needs seeing to. Fuck it, he'd go to your house, or get a room, but wouldn't force you back to the orphanage, at least for a long time.

You let him into your body again and again, his rough thrusts no different than when you two still shared a wedding ring. He bites your shoulder, he presses your face into the pillows, and spanks your thighs with his belt.

You never dared to tell him that you won't be able to join him for this stress relievers he seems to rely on. God knows what he'd do. Not to you, you don't take a screw driver to your knee when your sore spot acts up, but everything around you? Your spouse, your job, your life?

So you let him in.

One day he does demand that you go to the orphanage again. You could fight it all you want, but you have to go. There, he fucks you in the attic, just like that time all those years ago, and you decided he was the one you wanted to give your virginity to.

It's the closest he gets to whispering that he wants you back.

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

This was the hardest monthly wrap up I ever had to do because I forgot about it until like two days ago and my brain is not at its best and I'm tired so I can't really write a lot. So anyway as usual, spoilers and opinions below, read at your own risk.

QL - Currently Watching

🇹🇼 Blue Canvas of Youthful Days [2/12] - I really like the look of this show and all the art. I'm not yet sold on the main couple as a possible item but I really like the characters individually. I adore the second couple. The scene with the hearing aid was beautiful and I like the fact that it's not about the couple. Perhaps in a bl from a different country this would be about them finally being able to communicate, but because Liu knows sign language, it's simply about helping Tan Yin. Don't know why but I really liked this.

🇰🇷🇹🇭 Eccentric Romance [8/12] - It's not the worst thing ever but at several points during the episodes I find myself asking, what am I watching?

🇹🇭 Every You, Every Me [4/8] - This show constantly surprises me. The different stories every week and the aspec rep was how they got me at first but now I'm invested in the meta and the absolutely adorable mains. And this show is just so gorgeous to watch.

🇹🇭 Fourever You [5/16] - Beautiful Pond. Cute Earth. I'm annoyed. Hopefully the next couple is better in terms of storyline.

🇹🇭 Jack & Joker [8/12] - Can they just get together first and then give me all the drama? I'm okay with that. I actually liked Love Mechanics, so give it to me. But Jack is all over the place with his behaviour, he says Joke is family and they seem to have a shared view of the future, and they sure behave as if they're a couple, but then he hides things from Joke, supposedly 'for his own good'. I feel for Joke, because he's being jerked around by Jack.

🇹🇭 Kidnap [8/12] - I love Ohm. And that is the one and only reason I'm still here.

🇰🇷 Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo [6/8] - I'm obsessed. I think about this show way too much. It's painful and beautiful, brilliant writing and visuals and I need it to be over but I don't want it to end. I think we're gonna have a second time skip since they are not in our present yet and I just want to see them happy.

🇰🇷 Love in the Big City [4/8] - Obsessed in a total different way. This story is like an open tab in my brain at all times. I'm dreaming of edits and gifsets. I think of Young and my chest tightens. I'm having a hard time writing about the second part of the show because it's just so much, although it feels lighter than the novel. I'm dreading the next part.

🇯🇵 Love is a Poison [7/10] - I love it here. Everything about it. This being Shiba's first love sure explains a lot, and the onsen date was amazing. I think the actors are nailing this.

🇹🇭 Peaceful Property [10/12] - I've said enough about it. I'm here for TayNew and trying to just ignore everything else.

🇹🇭 Perfect 10 Liners [1/24] - And so it begins. Every gmmtv boy is here and they are all playing engineers. They got two Flukes and everything. I wish Force wasn't once again an asshole jock and Book the clueless fool but I guess that's too much to ask. This is the couple I'm least interested here so I want to see the rest.

🇹🇼 See Your Love [3/13] - Taiwan just doing giving all the rep with disabled characters and as usual a parade of bl actors. It's fine for now.

🇯🇵 Smells like Green Spirit [6/9] - I love Mishima. I think the scenes with him and Kirino are always great. I'm still not totally on board with the romance but I'm somewhat fascinated with Yumeno.

QL - Finished

🇹🇼 First Note of Love - I feel like I need to rewatch this as a binge because I think this format didn't help this particular show. Although I like the mains and I really liked the actors, their romance never truly clicked for me. I need more of the sides. The language banter was my favourite thing about this.

🇹🇭 I Saw You In My Dream - This is super cute. They are all adorable and they actually communicate. Ultimately I was a little underwhelmed about the concept.

🇹🇭 Monster Next Door - It's fine. I like Big and he was great here. But I've already forgotten everything about this.

🇭🇰 Our Golden Times - I watched it. It was okay.

🇹🇭 Reverse 4 You - Pretty show. Good concept. Not great execution all the way through.

Dropped / On Hold

Waiting to binge - 🇹🇭 The Loyal Pin | 🇹🇭 Apple | 🇻🇳 Teenager Judge

Rose Watches OJBL

Same Difference aka Docchi mo Docchi (2014) - I don't even know what to say. It's not good. That's it.

Others - Watched

🇯🇵Densetsu no Head Sho| 🇰🇷Black Out | 🇯🇵Double

Upcoming Shows - November

As usual my ask box is open. Have a wonderful weekend💜

[castlebyersafterdark]

I agree with you. The people who have problems with byler having sex are the younger fans. It has nothing to do with sexuality or gender. They are always calling people pedophiles for liking "their teen ship." It doesn't belong to them. I know many people have said this, but I think Will and Mike are meant to give a coming-of-age to people who never got one in the 80s. I think teens today have a hard time relating to it. Which may be part of the reason they are uncomfortable when people talk about it being groundbreaking. It's also noteworthy that no one gives a fuck when people were talking about mileven having sex at 14. A thing that was far more problematic for a lot of reasons. But byler having sex when they are older and emotionally mature is an issue for people. Adults tend to be more mature about sex. But this fandom in particular has been crazy to witness. The younger fans don't really get how to act in a fandom in general. They get upset if people have crack ships or do anything that isn't strictly canon. They get upset if someone has a theory that goes against what they like. They get upset if anyone actually has a background in a topic and knows more than them (i.e. there used to be a lot of people here who studied film and talked about that. At least up until a lot of younger people got upset they were proving their theories wrong. Then they got attacked for it.)

Being freaked out by sex falls in line with the rest of their behavior. Which is odd considering how many porn bots Tumblr has. You'd think they'd be more comfortable with it. But the people who are discussing spicy byler stuff are doing totally normal fandom things and I personally haven't witnessed anyone being creepy about this. So the outrage is (what a shock) out of proportion to the discussion that people are having about it. I think with this fandom in particular, there may have been more gay men in it at one point, but so many people have left now due to the hostility. I know Will means a lot to them so it's a shame if this is true. But I've seen a lot of homophobia coming from young people as well. Especially directed at Noah. It's possible they just left because they didn't want to listen to it anymore. I also thought it was funny and really odd that that one ask specifically mentioned lesbians being uncomfortable with byler having sex. WHY? No one is forcing them to have sex with a man if they watch it! It won't make them straight. People tend to like sex in general regardless of their own orientation. I'm sure there are lesbians around here who support the ship and the rep it brings and want it to be a good story too.

I don't have much more to add but this is a very good read on the current fandom culture in general!!

My hope moving forward is that well-adjusted and mature, level-headed fans just trying to have a good time exploring all a fandom/ship offers can find their people and seek out these little circles until the greater fandom changes as time moves forward, don't engage with contentious people who are probably teens ill-equipped to handle the world outside their own perspective yet, and keep speaking up against any hatred. Wish I'd done that in the past but, well. Here I am now. Continuously crossing my fingers for change on the horizon 🤞🤞🤞

[howlsofbloodhounds]

Delta anon here again and I've got another headcanon for you:

Delta and Beta are very touch starved (as are all of the Epic Sanses, honestly), and absolutely love physical affection/attention, but don't necessarily know how to ask for it, much less how to ask for it without being embarrassed by showing vulnerability and admitting they need things.

(Beta's also probably not used to being allowed to ask for affection, due to our headcanon of him maybe being abused before he had fallen into the underground, so he was probably taught from a very young age that initiating affection wasn't allowed or okay to do, or that affection might turn into hurt.)

And since the Epic Sanses have all been friends for probably years, they most likely began to be able to pick up on Delta/Beta's cues on when they need something but don't want to ask. Said cues might be lingering around a bit too long, sudden physical touch or affection, randomly bringing up something relating to their need so they can see how their friends would react before they attempt asking. Stuff like that, probably.

(They test the waters like this, mostly because they're too embarrassed to ask for the attention/affection they need, because vulnerability is not a concept they're good with yet. Sure, they're vulnerable with their friends in some ways, but they'd rather die than ask for affection/attention straightforwardly.)

Color and Epic would also just eventually get used to Delta/Beta becoming more and more comfortable with them physically over the years. It still takes Delta and Beta a bit of time to feel comfortable asking, so instead of asking like a normal person, they settle for initiating - subtle nudges, leaning against/on them, stuff like that. And eventually once they got comfortable enough, they'd probably be fine with just silently cuddling right up to Color or Epic if they need the attention and aren't getting it.

Lucky for them, Color and Epic are patient and are able to understand what they need after a while. If they see Delta or Beta getting fidgety or trying to subtly initiate affection, they'll gladly reciprocate and offer affection.

(In my mind, it's sort of like how a cat wants attention but would rather die than be normal about it and ask for pets. It also might be how cats pretend to show disinterest, but in reality, they do want the attention.)

Thoughts?

I think this is a wonderful but also kind sad headcanon, although the thought of them getting better at initiating physical affection eventually makes me very happy.

It actually kinda reminds me of how I picture Killer and his cat-like ways. I usually view him (at least while in Stage 2) to have been so used to either being denied what he wanted or needed, or having those things held over him and used to control him, that he just started detaching from ever needing or wanting anything—which was only encouraged and reinforced. Really helps to convince someone that they’re an emotionless being if they believe they no longer have needs or wants.

So I always pictured that once he realizes that he actually needs something (id imagine itd be a lot harder for him to recognize or care about a want, if he’s internalized that what he wants doesn’t matter), he’s basically gonna do just about anything to get what he thinks he needs and to keep it. Manipulation, intimidation, blackmail, mind games, people pleasing and fawning.

Which is why I often think it’d take a long time for him to do things like express affection or ask for it openly if there’s no reason for it—those things are often tools for him, and he rarely wants affection for affection’s sake.

But when he does, he engineers reasons and situations and excuses for why someone has to touch him or why he has to touch someone else (this last one is often easy, considering he relies on physical touch for grounding, he can either use his rep as a disrespectful asshole who doesn’t care for others’ physical space to hide his grounding technique, or he can use his grounding technique with closer people such as Color as a justification for why he’s touching.

Or he may even do things like let Color hold his hand, with the justification of “keep him happy, and he’ll stay,” even though Killer wanted to hold hands too lmao.)

(making someone so mad they hit him, “accidentally” getting hurt or cutting himself so someone has to touch him to treat his wounds and they have to do it gently and carefully unless they want to hurt him. (which in the case of someone like Color, who claims so often that he doesn’t enjoy or want to hurt Killer, this type of situation also doubles as a test, a sort of landmine that Color has to be careful with.

Because although Stage 2 does enjoy pain (he would very likely enjoy being hurt by Color lmao), if he’s hurt in a “vulnerable” position by someone like Color, then he will just take it as proof of his fucked up worldview—and it’s likely that it could potentially have a ripple effect on to Stage 1, who does not enjoy being hurt.

Which must be so exhausting for Color, having to navigate what is and isn’t a test for him—and sometimes im sure color just sees right through him and calls him out on it.)

This also allows him to comfort of less vulnerability and a lot more control of these interactions—someone is only touching him because he made this situation where they have to, and they do not need to know that he wanted them to touch him. Which suggests a want, suggest an attachment, which—in his mind—can then be used against him if that person realizes the “power” they have over him.

Silly fella and his fucked up little world views on relationships and power dynamics.)

Which all in all, I’m sure helping and understanding Delta and Beta’s problems with asking or starting affection is more like a breath of fresh air. I’m sure this is mainly because, compared to Killer’s innate distrust for others, his control issues, his little tests and naturally manipulative ways, and the conflicting desires of his Stages, this is much more straight forward.

Color would likely take notice of Delta and Beta’s tells, notice even small things like their lingering, and would at least be able to tell that they want something—and can either ask directly (perhaps instead just asking them if he can have a hug, rather then having them ask for it), or just wait for them to feel ready to.

[greghatecrimes]

I don't think you can say house md was not homophobic even with the so called "rep" it's definitely a product of its time but you don't gotta lie and say it was more progressive than it was, you can just like the show while acknowledging it's problems. Yes, there was a bisexual character, who had countless biphobic jokes made at their expense. There was a whole episode where house and wilson talk about how weird it is for one of the nurses to date a trans woman who they call a tranny. There's a whole episode about them discovering a teen girl is intersex and house misgendering her by calling her a man the whole episode and telling her that her anger is due to the cancer she has when she becomes upset about being told she is "not really a girl" I love the show too, but every person that says the show is homophobic and transphobic is right, it's a product of its time, it still more bigoted than "progressive", and liking it even like that is not a crime or makes you a bad person. Let's not lie about what it is just because we like the show, plenty of queer people do but that doesn't make it less bigoted.

Respectfully: I don't think I'm lying at all when I say it was progressive for its time.

You're right, though, anon! It ABSOLUTELY could be bigoted, too, especially in the early seasons (specifically I'm thinking of the moments you mentioned, the one with the nurse House and Wilson discuss, and the entire episode "Skin Deep", etc.) and I can acknowledge that. I agree, it doesn't make someone a bad person to enjoy something like this show that is indeed a product of its time. But even just beyond the "rep" of having Thirteen as a canon bisexual character, the show did so much that was progressive for its time IRT: lgbt+ presence in media.

Just one example of many I could give is "The Softer Side". The entire episode "Skin Deep" is something I like to skip over, but it's not a "forgive and forget" type of thing. I don't approve of the episode and I want to hold the writers who came up with that entire thing and everyone who let it slide accountable. But three seasons later, we got "The Softer Side", written by Liz Friedman. The Softer Side's patient is a child who was born intersex, but was given gender assignment surgery at birth, and whose parents don't want him to know he's intersex. The episode handles his case with such care that I don't think a show today could really even come close to achieving. The issue was never that this kid was intersex. He's not being treated for a condition that was caused by him being intersex. Him being intersex has nothing to do with the diagnosis he gets at the end of the episode! The only reason him being intersex came up during his case is because his parents didn't want him to know, and thus told the doctors at PPTH to lie to him about testosterone he was being given (it's implied his parents had been giving it to him for at least a year/a short while iirc). And the team at PPTH (specifically Thirteen) thought that he had the right to know, that it would be good for him to know and understand this part of himself! They're supportive! The episode doesn't wave away the fact that he was given gender assignment surgery! It pushes for an acceptance of both masculine and feminine and giving people the freedom to decide for themselves, even when they are children (and not saying a child the patient's age is too young to know what he/she wants, etc.)

The way House MD and Liz Friedman handled this absofuckingloutely blows other shows portrayal of intersex people at the time out of the water. Does it make up for Skin Deep, or the t-slur comment? No. But it set a precedent for how other TV shows should handle such subject matter going forward. This is why I don't think the show as a whole is homophobic, despite having homophobic/transphobic/bigoted moments.

It's also worth noting that Liz Friedman, who wrote The Softer Side, is a lesbian herself, was a writer on Xena: Warrior Princess (an earlier example of queercoding), and was one of two LGBT writers who were in charge of writing all of Thirteen's plotlines.

[bumblebyaf]

the pricefield breakup was good

just finished double exposure and while the game had many flaws i entirely disagree with one of the biggest complaints i’ve seen both before and after the games release: the pricefield breakup. in fact, the pricefield breakup is my favorite part of the game and one of the most fascinating character writing decisions that defined a lot max’s character for me…so here’s my essay on why max & chloe could never work long term, the breakup was incredibly natural, and how its the only way for both of them to move on. don’t bother reading of course if you don’t want to hear any of these opinions <3 

to start off the bat (and this will be the paragraph people hate the most): max & chloe are one of the weakest lis pairings (and again this is obviously all my opinion). they honestly never even had that much chemistry to me and i probably never would have shipped them had the game come out later but since the game came out when it did and it was the first gay game i’d ever played and they were like the only gay rep i knew it was brilliant & i think nostalgia for this clouds a lot of what people see when they think of pricefield but objectively they never make sense as a pairing to me and i find their scenes together quite awkward or boring. chloe is an asshole to max throughout the whole game (and i am a huge chloe supporter, i understand absolutely where all of her anger and issues were stemming from and it made sense!) and max is either a pushover who just lets her do it or like entirely indifferent to it/ignores it i guess depending on how you play; and max is shitty too i mean we know she ghosted chloe for years and then went back to blackwell for like a month or whatever without ever looking up chloe and who knows if she ever actually would have. which like max doesn’t have an obligation to do that but she clearly wanted to after she meets chloe again and then she spends so much of the game thinking about how chloe replaced her with rachel when max left first and trying to just slot herself back into the exact spot she left (also chloe did not replace her anyway they were entirely different relationships). (unrelated but this is why i hate when people have max add her name to the wall in the junkyard hide out lol) max spends the entire game watching chloe die in several different ways and trying desperately to keep her alive which has got to make a crazy trauma bond/attachment and honestly aside from one or two very obviously written “gay” scenes chloe barely registers as romantically interested in max to me (which…yeah chloe is spending the whole game going through a lot of stuff!) right up until the end where chloe realizes how hard max has been trying to keep her alive/max has been helping her with all the struggles she’s having this week/backing her up with her family drama etc during a time where chloe doesn’t really think anyone cares about her…which i don’t know again seems like a trauma bond to me! and then max sacrifices an entire town for her? of course they get together. you also have to remember that this game takes place during like the WORST week of these two young girls lives it’s just crazy to me how people define their entire relationship/personalities by this time period 

also like i know a lot of LIS fans don’t love BTS because its a different studio and the original LIS writers never wanted a prequel & that for some reason a lot of LIS fans think rachel is the devils fucking spawn BUT thats a different argument (bts being my second favorite game & rachel my third favorite character) but after watching chloe in bts (still with Issues and trauma but less heavy and more shared) and seeing her fall in love with rachel there i could never see her with max the same way

also to be clear i’m not saying at all that i think max & chloe don’t care for each other deeply; i do believe they love each other my argument is just that this relationship could never really last long term and mostly stemmed from the trauma they were going through which brings me to the main part:

max & chloe breaking up makes perfect sense for their characters, especially the reason given as well. chloe telling max that she wants to move forward and live in the future but max is always looking to the past- this single line sold me on the break up immediately i found it fascinating! max does live in the past! its her entire power! her entire game is about rewinding over and over to make the perfect moment etc. max’s character is constantly being brought into question when it comes to how she uses her powers even when she only ever tries to use them for good reason (in particularly i really like the subtle way the comics handled this too, BY CHLOE, but i know not everyone likes the comics either and they’re obviously not canon to the games since they contradict double exposure lore as well. but in the comics an alternate timeline chloe criticizes max on how reflexively she uses her powers to save/help people without considering how rewinding a moment affects everyone around them as well- and how sometimes things go wrong but can work out anyway. this is proven by us also following a second timeline without max there to rewind and we see how those characters navigate the issues max erased and in some instances they turn out even better and i like a happier healthier chloe having this perspective).  i feel like the chloe we meet in life is strange is so specific to that one game (she is going through so much active trauma and it is literally like the worst week of her life) but the pieces of her i’ve seen outside of that game show me how much her character can change when given space to breathe so i don’t think its fair to hold her to just that week. i can very easily see how chloe would want to put everything behind her and try to fully move on/away from everything that has happened and this being the only way she feels she can move forward- similarly how max could spend everyday stuck living with the choices she made and the effects its had on her, how much harder it is for her to separate and move on. 

i also think it makes perfect sense that chloe could grow some resentment towards max for her mothers death- i’m sure chloe wouldn’t act on this but i can see them both knowing it’s there and chloe not really being able to help feeling it. i mean chloe really is fully accepting of her death in life is strange and its max who makes the choice to keep her alive (and yes it’s shitty of chloe to make it seem like a choice at all but that’s also just like…the game having to give the player a choice too). chloe has to live with knowing her mother and everyone she knew died so she could live and max has to live with knowing she directly made that choice and both of them have to just…know and live and think about this everyday they’re with each other how can they move on? is that not suffocating? with some space they can at least maybe start to really separate from it 

i also think chloe’s implied insecurities around max rewinding parts of their relationship also make sense to be honest…max spends the entire game trying to fix every interaction to be the right one like i KNOW she would rewind mistakes because i DID that as her; and maybe you can say max would never use her powers again after the storm but to be honest i don’t think thats true…i think she would never redo grand scale things again (except i guess she does in double exposure) but i just don’t know if i believe she could resist the temptation to keep her and chloe’s interactions perfect- at least in the beginning. i’m not saying she DOES but i GET it- i understand chloe’s paranoia (if it is just paranoia and not fact) because i don’t think i could trust either because i also understand MAX. max who killed an entire town for chloe & their relationship- wouldn’t you feel like you had to keep doing everything in your power to make sure it works? to keep it good, to keep chloe happy?  it’s a really complicated feeling for both of them i’m sure

and i think chloe is right when she says max is always living in the past because we literally see her doing it during the game. she’s still journaling to chloe, she keeps chloe in her wallet & on her wall, we keep having flashbacks to arcadia, max keeps a box of arcadia with her (even though we know she’s also been traveling/on the road most of her adult life), she’s never discussed any part of her past with her friends, her photography focus is about the lonely and abandoned. the entirely of double exposure is about max learning how to really stop living in the past and the harm it could do (through what happened to maya and safi and how its still happening four years later because no one ever really dealt with it etc) and that’s why this undercurrent and the pricefield breakup is my absolute favorite part of this game and the best part of it

i also think it’s really worth pointing out what a lot of people seem to have missed (in the complaints i did see); max & chloe didn’t have some horrible explosive ending and they hate each other forever now and the two are forever ruined or whatever…chloe simply saw she could never truly move forward with max and maybe more importantly she saw max could never move forward with her (how could max move forward from the worst choice she’s ever had to make in her life when she’s also sharing a bed with it?) chloe still loves and cares for her, max still loves her, they could be on friendly terms very easily- in fact i think the only reason they don’t talk right now is because of max (which is for the best during this time i think anyway) and chloe would be absolutely open to their friendship whenever max is ready. chloe wants the best for both of them & chloe’s text at the end of the game proves she’s still thinking of max & open to talking again whenever max is. max also has feeling by the end of the game that’s ready to really start moving forward from arcadia now and one day she will be ready to confront chloe again and i think whenever that happens the two will be really good friends again- like they always were.

[bluecrocss]

Another Yap-sesh: PJO CASTING for Season 2 (Please read)

In light of the recent casting announcements, I just wanted to remind the greater PJO fandom (not that I should have to), THIS ADAPTATION IS NOT CONCERNED WITH "BOOK ACCURACY" WHEN IT COMES TO PHYSICAL APPEARANCE.

They are prioritizing personality and acting ability.

I shouldn't HAVE to spell this out, since none of the literal main characters have been book accurate, but I'm still seeing shit like, "Idc if annabeth is black, but Rachel BETTER have red hair", "Thalia HAS to have her blue eyes! It's so important in the book", yadda yadda yadda

If the main characters aren't book accurate, idk why y'all are acting like they're suddenly going to lock in with side characters based off features that y'all are pretending are more important than they are because in all honesty, you just don't like change (let's at least be honest).

Like... no, it doesn't matter that Rachel Dare's initials spell out R.E.D. The red hair, literally does not fundamentally affect her story arc in the original series (I know y'all are gonna come up with some dumb B.S. like "that's the first thing Percy noticed about her! Red hair is the ONLY thing that will make her stand out!" "We're losing redhead rep. Rachel is the only character that made me feel okay about having red hair!" blah blah blah lmao)

Listen, with the exception of characters like Nico, Bianca, Ethan Nakamura, etc. Where their ethnicity actually plays into the character or story arc, y'all need to let go of hair color, skin tone, eye color, etc.

The announcements that have been leaked for Thalia and Tyson are asking for actors of any ethnicity and have no mention of any particular physical features (just an age range, that Thalia will have a punk aesthetic and Tyson needs to look like a large teenager). So accept the following:

Thalia might not have dark hair or blue eyes

Either character may be non-white (that doesn't mean they'll be black, cuz I know some of y'all will automatically try to use this as an excuse to be anti-black [["Anti-woke" losers try not use black people as a scapegoat challenge, level: impossible]]. And also, they never actually described Tyson's racial identity lmao. Y'all just tend to default to white. I'm sure you won't be losing your minds about "book accuracy" when the actor doesn't have big, disjointed, yellow teeth either).

Anyway, I'm actually deviating from the point. I don't particularly have any aesthetic demands for the characters, believe it or not. I personally don't need either of them to be poc (but I will always stand by, that DEI is a good thing and white people can never lose "rep", since it's not something y'all were ever barred from), nor do I care about eye color or hair color. They could both be completely "book accurate" and I wouldn't have an issue with it (although, I kinda hope Rachel Dare won't be a redhead, so the last of the "book accuracy" as a shield for bigotry cry babies will finally drop this series once and for all, so the rest of us can enjoy it for what it is).

The point of the post is that there is a *chance* they might not be physically book accurate, and there is no reason for y'all to put another young actor through what you demons put 12 year old Leah through (feel free to read the pinned on my page, careful tho, I'm a yapper, to get a clearer idea of that whole mess).

Once y'all leave your little echo-chamber of false reality that is the internet, actors are working people who apply for jobs they are qualified for. If there are no physical or racial specifications for a role, these working actors, who are hoping for their big break have every right to audition (btw, it's not "race-swapping" if the auditions are open to everyone. Check my pinned). When they are given that role, that is the decision of Disney, the casting directors, and Mr. Rick Riordan himself. If you disagree, find the private emails of the people responsible and contact them yourselves. Harassing the actors for fairly earning the role, and complaining about their casting on public pages "(not based off their performance, solely on their looks), which will just incite more hate towards them for being a WORKING ACTOR and accepting a JOB, makes you a bigot. No two ways about it. It is just insane behavior.

What's that completely inaccurate adage about insanity, again? Something about doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results.

Y'all have seen the first season. The author, show-runners, writers AND producers have spoken ad nauseam about the direction of this adaptation. The books have not been burned. They still exist in all their glory for you to read. If you need 1:1 book accuracy, this adaptation is not for you. Plenty of people have enjoyed it for what it is. Why are you making yourself miserable? Why are you making the fandom miserable? Why are you desperately trying to make the actors (most of whom are minors) miserable?

Nobody is holding a gun to your head. Simply, don't. Watch. It.

Cuz if they announce the casting for season 2, and y'all starting acting shocked that they're not "book accurate" and sending hate mobs to young actors and inciting racism and bigotry in the Fandom AGAIN... I think it'll finally speak to the true nature of this fandom. It was never about "book accuracy" it was always about hate. Whatever superiority complex the PJO fandom has been carrying over a certain *wizarding* series... y'all can just chuck out the window.