#incorrect yandere quotes

[kiame-sama]

Fem!Reader: Fuck it.

Yan!Lilia: I thought the term was "fuck you"

Fem!Reader: Fuck me yourself, you coward. *Saunters away*

Sebek: How dare-?!

Yan!Lilia: *loosens his tie* boys, I expect you all to honor and respect your new mother figure. *Chases after reader*

Silver/Sebek/Malleus: eh??

[yandereloveraw]

My yandere shapeshifter self insert: I made sure that I can be whatever you want me to be. I can change anything about myself that you don't like, okay? Just let me know, and I can do that for you. ♡

[yandereunsolved]

Yandere Bruce Wayne: "Mine." holds darling close to his chest.

Clark Kent: "A human being is not an—" looks at darling.

Yandere Clark Kent: "Mine, not yours."

[acid-ixx]

"hostage situation"

series masterlist

nightwing, to his siblings: okay, so we have to be real careful because the joker and harley quinn are holding our baby sibling hostage and we can't put them in anymore danger.

nightwing, looks at red robin: i'm sure they have some traps laid around the lair so you'll be disarming it.

red robin, nods:

robin: then me and todd will be handling any spare targets, no?

nightwing: of course. cass, steph and duke will be guarding the entrance. babs?

oracle, speaking in the intercoms: this is the closest point of entry where (name) is being kept hostage.

red robin: security cams suggest there's more than just harley and the joker in the lair. a bunch of their goons are heavily guarding both the entrance and the exit. we should thread carefully.

oracle: there's no camera's where (name) is exactly at, but there's a specific room where it's shown that the two are often visiting.

batman, who had been lurking behind them: this is a priority mission. we can't afford to make mistakes.

robin, eyebrows raised: though, is it necessary to bring the entire family? me and my father could handle this entirely by ourselves.

jason, sighs: don't pretend like you weren't the first to suggest the entire justice league to come searching for them, kid.

batman: enough arguing, (name) needs all the support they could get after this. so on my count, we are to bust open the door.

dick: alright, everybody, prepare.

*meanwhile, inside the lair, in a makeshift "house"*

(name), sitting on a comfy chair whilst holding a cup of hot chocolate and a book in the other, sneezes: oh— did anyone mention my name?

harley quinn, already on her way to wipe their nose: oh my baby! is our baby sick?!

(name): no, i just suddenly sneezed?

the joker, in another room: i spy with my little eye, a child way past their bedtime~ c'mon babyboo, let's get you to bed!

(name): awe, but it's like, 10pm. i wanna read some more.

harley, about to pick (name) up: then let momma read the book for you in bed, cutesy pie—

*the door to the kitchen slams open*

dick, with his escrima sticks on-hand: surrender (name) to us now or—!

dick, absolutely befuddled: wait, what?!

damian, with bruce in tow: what's the hold up, nightwing?!

damian, about to jump right in front of dick before he was stopped by bruce's hand on his shoulder: what is... this?

bruce: ... explain the meaning of this, harley.

harley, holds (name) closer to her chest as she's equally confused: what do ya mean, bats? ain't it obvious i'm taking care of my child?

(name): uhm...

damian, visibly offended: what do you mean, your child? (name) over there is ours.

the joker, walks over to the room in a hurry: what's with all the commotion over here?! (name) is supposed to be in bed, harle— batman?!

bruce, with squinted eyes: don't act stupid, what is this all about?

nightwing, surveying the room: wait, why is (name) in pajamas?

(name), trying their best to shrug in harley's tight hug: i'm... supposed to go to bed...?

the joker, about to walk over to (name) before he's stopped by a batarang almost hitting the side of his head: hey! what's that for? i'm clearly not trying to attack my own child!

bruce: (name) is my child, not yours.

the joker, glaring at batman: well, it's not my fault they choose me over you!

(name) wayne, interrupting the two: uhm... i did technically disown myself from the family so—

damian: disown yourself?

(name): i have every reason to—

dick: look, baby bird, you don't know what's right for you, these guys are dangerous—

(name): i literally got nearly killed by some nobody criminals if not for harley saving me but okay, nightwing.

bruce, whose attention is now on (name): you almost got what now?

(name), rolling their eyes: i almost died, batman. now if you excuse me, i think i deserve a good night sleep tonight.

(name), looks at harley who still hasn't released them from the protective hug: can we?

harley quinn, facepalming in her mind as she stares back at (name): oh, i should've bought you to pam and selina instead.

[nosyrobin]

Y/N: My ex is crazy, y'all. I've had him blocked on everything for weeks and yet he still manages to find ways to contact me.

Y/N: *turns camera to microwave* Bro this what i'm talking about look. He’s calling me on my microwave how was that even…. I didn't know microwaves could do- How is he doing that?

Y/N: That actually impressive you go girl.

[ironicallyyn]

Mc: hey Lucifer.. wanna see something funny?

Lucifer: ... Sure?

Mc: shout

Lucifer: (shouts... But nothing happens) ?

Mc: (shouts)

Mammon, Levi and Asmo barged into the room: I HEARD SHOUTING!! MC ARE YOU OKAY!!??

[talkbycolor]

Sol: I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response. MC: Wow. They sound stupid. Sol: But they’re not. They’re really smart actually. Just dense. MC: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!” Sol: I guess you’re right. Hey MC, I love you. MC: See! Just say that! Sol: Holy fucking shit. MC: If that flies over their head then, sorry Sol, but they're too dumb for you. Sol: MC.

[luxthestrange]

RoR Incorrect quotes#188 No thoughts head empty stare

Y/n*Sitting beside him giggles seeing your villager and his villager from Animal Crossing get married* Til death do us part, right, Puppy?

Anubis*Who thinks they're actually married now and grins at you* It's cute you think death can separate us~

[kiame-sama]

Darling: *immediately gives their name, says thank you, accepts all gifts, and happily eats the food given to them*

Yan!Malleus: *sweats in Fae*

[steor-ra]

Jason: you think you could make me fold just by being stupid and cooing disgusting spit bubbles?

Jason: well you're...!

Baby!Y/n babbling and cooing at bigbro jayjay while making grabby hands at him. Trying to reach his face and puckering her lips: hmmh

Jason: –So so right! AWE BABY! *smashes his cheek to theirs and proceeds to rub against it*

Meanwhile Tim is sipping coffee in his room as he watches from the camera the newfound blackmail for his jerk of a brother

[dontbesoweirdkira]

Platonic Yan! Batboys x Batsis darling

A/N: I want to talk about the concept of batsis having a s/o or a crush and how the family would react to that. I'm sure this concept might've been done but if i may speak-

Warnings: Obsession, relationship sabotage, overbearing family dynamics

Requests: always open.

Masterlist

Dick Grayson

I think he's kind of complex about this issue. I don't think !yan Dick would have a problem with you dating in itself. Like there is so many siblings and no way to keep all of these hormonal teen and young adults at bay. He's been there, he gets it.

But there's some conditions. You have to have a good relationship with dick, first. It you are close, that means you tell him...everything. He can easily monitor you and the progression of things. You'll be trusted to tell him is something goes wrong and he can step in. You won't mind Dick tagging along or being generally invasive. You won't forget about him or the family, he knows that you'll drop everything and come running. His grip is already secured firmly around you and your mind so theres no reason to worry. Have fun, be safe.

If you're anything like my previous posts where batsis is not close with dick in the slightest, he'd sabotage that relationship. He's not having it at all. Your dating is a threat to the family. You already have an apprehension of him, so anyone can swoop in and take his sis away. He doesn't want that. He doesn't trust your judgement or decision making skills enough. Dick knows that if someone hurt you or was dangerous, you'd hid it from him. You refuse to give Dick any sort of access to your life so therefore dating is a no. Sorry baby bat, it's for your own good!

But maybe i'm wrong. Maybe Dick doesn't want any of his siblings dating..especially his batsis. I've said before that Dick has given up his previous relationships among other things for the family. His siblings are his most important priority and he's willing to do whatever it takes to make sure they're properly provided for. What if he expects the same. He's jealous over the fact you all get to go out and date and he cannot because he's stuck playing dad? What if he's jealous that you're spending all your time with someone else? You don't have time for your older brother anymore

He's hurt when you embarrassingly hide your partner from him. You're critiquing everything he does and tells him not to call you by the nicknames he gave you. Yan! Dick hates being discarded. And maybe, none of this happened? Maybe you gladly show off your brother to your partner? Maybe just the thought of you one day getting married and leaving him fills his mind. He overthinks about being left here alone like Bruce was...he doesn't want that. He cannot have that. You cannot date for your own good...for his own good

Jason Todd

I don't think he'll ever vocalize his true feelings. and reluctantly allows it. Jason is rather against you dating, but because he doesn't trust anyone outside of the family. Plus he doesn't like that he gets to see you way less now.

Jason would be the brother that'd be cleaning his guns while you're introducing you partner to him. His tone is sharp and he doesn't embrace them once. He wants them to know there is someone in your life that'll kill for you if they hurt you.

I think if Jason sensed the person you were dating wasn't any good, he'd handle it privately. Your partner ghosts you for three days then sends a "i don't want to see you ever again." text. Weird. Everything was going great. Luckily your brother Jason just got back from his three day trip to comfort you.

If the partner is good but he doesn't really get any time with you, i think he's get a little out of character. Suddenly he's a lot more clingy to you when you're there. He's just following you around the entire house and wanting to spend every second with you. If it gets bad enough he will have to intervene with his other siblings. He misses you. This whole dating things sucks, who needs them when you have a perfect family. They're all you need.

Damien Wayne

He doesn't like change. At. All. This family is perfect as it is.

So don't mess it up by changing the natural order of things. This partner of yours is a nuisance. An incompetent, brain dead loser who is dragging you down with them. You don't need them. Damien is rather offended that you felt like you even needed something more outside of the family. What does this prick have that they don't?

He's weary of the fact that this person wanted to date you. Not that you're not enough but you're a Wayne now. People always wants something, if not money, its something else. You're foolish for this.

On a deeper level, Damien feels like he's loosing a parent. It's clear that your partner doesn't like your younger brother or even want him around. He misses you driving him around, reading together and sneaking out. You've never taken his often impolite banter to heart, you loved him as he was. He felt drawn to you. You were like a mother figure to him..don't do this. He;s sad and thinks you don't love him anymore.

Tim Drake

Maybe the least closest to you. You probably think he doesn't even like you but it's not true. He's just an observer more than a hands on type of person. He's just as yandere as the others, he cares. The second he got the name of your partner, he spends all day searching up dirt on them. He has a file of blackmail sitting pretty on his hard drive in case that person hurts you.

He's not confrontational like the rest. He's a bit too socially awkward for that but if he seriously felt you were in danger, he'd stop you. I think he'd mainly plot with the others to sabotage the relationship.

Like Damien, he doesn't understand why you need someone so badly. The family is more that fulfilling to him so why not for you? Time misses the little things like when you'd bring him food to his desk, or usher him to take a break from his computer. He misses your laughter and interactions with the rest of the family. He doesn't feel safe with you being out so much. The world is a dangerous place, it's safer here, where everyone can protect you. They all love you, and their love combined is far stronger than your partners.

[yandereunsolved]

Deity reader after seeing one of their lovesick Targaryens die in The Dance of the Dragons again—

Deity reader: "I have never understood you mortals insistent need to lose your lives over trivial things such as succession."

Yandere Daemon & Aemond: "He started it."

Deity reader: "I am omnipotent. I have seen the entire battle and the conclusion of the war beyond it. I have never indulged in your kind so much before. Consider your revivals gift for the reverence you pay to me."

They immediately get revived so Deity reader doesn't have to deal with them anymore.

Yandere Jacaerys pops up in their heavenly domain for the fifth time this week. (The time tells that it is only that of the third day within the seven.)

Deity reader: "Why do you keep sacrificing yourself to earn my approval? You already have my favor and my protection."

Yandere Jacaerys: "I only wish to please you and admire your divinity. I would stake myself a thousand times over if only to get a glimpse of you."

Yandere Aegon deciding to pray to Deity reader at that exact moment.

Yandere Aegon: "Mommy, Daddy, whatever you prefer, please keep my stupid brother, that worthless bastard, and my idiotic uncle dead. I will worship you between your thighs and with the body you have blessed me with for the rest of eternity if you do this. I'll do it anyway. I mean it. Please let me—"

Deity reader: "Oh, for my sake. I should never let that man into my heavenly domain."

[acid-ixx]

(name) wayne, gagged and tied to a chair:

the villain, untying their gag: hahaha! i have kidnapped you for ransom and your father only has 5 hours left to save you by paying me!!!

(name) wayne: damn bruh my father hasn't spoken to me in 13 and a half years i don't think he's coming for me at all, better if you shoot me instead lmao cause i don't think batman would save me either

villain: ...

yan! villain, untying your ropes: welp, kidnapping is basically illegal adoption, am i right?

(name) wayne: as long as i'm fed three times a day and you read me bed time stories before i sleep then i guess that counts?

yan! villain: sweetheart, you are getting more than that.

[my-names-angel-but-im-not-one]

Petty mc #4

*everyone playing the guessing game in HOL*

MC: alright guys guess who am I?

Everyone: okay!

MC: *starts to slouch* ""yeah Lilith died because of God , now I'll never forgive humans , even though they have nothing to do with it!!"" *Starts to fake strangle themselves*

Everyone:

MC: alright guess now that was a pretty good acting !

Belphie: *sweating* I don't like this game anymore.....

[ironicallyyn]

Obey me cast getting Outta character.... Pt..?

Dinner at HoL

Mc: the food looks so cute! I can't eat this (⁠づ⁠￣⁠ ⁠³⁠￣⁠)⁠づ

Mammon:

Satan:

Beel:

Belphie:

Asmo: you're cute too but I'd still eat y-

Lucifer: ONE DINNER

Levi: here we go again..

Lucifer: ONE NORMAL DINNER IS ALL I ASK FOR!

[queenie-the-court-jester]

oc incorrect quotes #5

y/n: cotton dear, I think you should-

Cotton: kick me out and I will k!ll myself.

Y/n: ...

1 hour later

*cotton sighs happily as he burried his face into y/n's chest, the latter staring off into the void with a deadpanned look*