#incorrect yandere quotes

[kiame-sama]

Fem!Reader: Fuck it.

Yan!Lilia: I thought the term was "fuck you"

Fem!Reader: Fuck me yourself, you coward. *Saunters away*

Sebek: How dare-?!

Yan!Lilia: *loosens his tie* boys, I expect you all to honor and respect your new mother figure. *Chases after reader*

Silver/Sebek/Malleus: eh??

[yandereloveraw]

Sarah/YG: Hey, sweetheart.

Me: Huh?

Sarah/YG: Um...I..I can't live without you!

Me: Wh-

Sarah/YG: For your sake, I...can kill Peter.

[I gasp and take an unsteady step back]

Sarah/YG, creeping closer with a lovestruck expression: Hey, sweetheart. We can kill my annoying brother together. 🩷

Source: Oreimo

YG/Sarah belongs to @invertedmindinc and @y0urb0yfriend

[yandereunsolved]

Yandere Bruce Wayne: "Mine." holds darling close to his chest.

Clark Kent: "A human being is not an—" looks at darling.

Yandere Clark Kent: "Mine, not yours."

[acid-ixx]

"hostage situation"

series masterlist

nightwing, to his siblings: okay, so we have to be real careful because the joker and harley quinn are holding our baby sibling hostage and we can't put them in anymore danger.

nightwing, looks at red robin: i'm sure they have some traps laid around the lair so you'll be disarming it.

red robin, nods:

robin: then me and todd will be handling any spare targets, no?

nightwing: of course. cass, steph and duke will be guarding the entrance. babs?

oracle, speaking in the intercoms: this is the closest point of entry where (name) is being kept hostage.

red robin: security cams suggest there's more than just harley and the joker in the lair. a bunch of their goons are heavily guarding both the entrance and the exit. we should thread carefully.

oracle: there's no camera's where (name) is exactly at, but there's a specific room where it's shown that the two are often visiting.

batman, who had been lurking behind them: this is a priority mission. we can't afford to make mistakes.

robin, eyebrows raised: though, is it necessary to bring the entire family? me and my father could handle this entirely by ourselves.

jason, sighs: don't pretend like you weren't the first to suggest the entire justice league to come searching for them, kid.

batman: enough arguing, (name) needs all the support they could get after this. so on my count, we are to bust open the door.

dick: alright, everybody, prepare.

*meanwhile, inside the lair, in a makeshift "house"*

(name), sitting on a comfy chair whilst holding a cup of hot chocolate and a book in the other, sneezes: oh— did anyone mention my name?

harley quinn, already on her way to wipe their nose: oh my baby! is our baby sick?!

(name): no, i just suddenly sneezed?

the joker, in another room: i spy with my little eye, a child way past their bedtime~ c'mon babyboo, let's get you to bed!

(name): awe, but it's like, 10pm. i wanna read some more.

harley, about to pick (name) up: then let momma read the book for you in bed, cutesy pie—

*the door to the kitchen slams open*

dick, with his escrima sticks on-hand: surrender (name) to us now or—!

dick, absolutely befuddled: wait, what?!

damian, with bruce in tow: what's the hold up, nightwing?!

damian, about to jump right in front of dick before he was stopped by bruce's hand on his shoulder: what is... this?

bruce: ... explain the meaning of this, harley.

harley, holds (name) closer to her chest as she's equally confused: what do ya mean, bats? ain't it obvious i'm taking care of my child?

(name): uhm...

damian, visibly offended: what do you mean, your child? (name) over there is ours.

the joker, walks over to the room in a hurry: what's with all the commotion over here?! (name) is supposed to be in bed, harle— batman?!

bruce, with squinted eyes: don't act stupid, what is this all about?

nightwing, surveying the room: wait, why is (name) in pajamas?

(name), trying their best to shrug in harley's tight hug: i'm... supposed to go to bed...?

the joker, about to walk over to (name) before he's stopped by a batarang almost hitting the side of his head: hey! what's that for? i'm clearly not trying to attack my own child!

bruce: (name) is my child, not yours.

the joker, glaring at batman: well, it's not my fault they choose me over you!

(name) wayne, interrupting the two: uhm... i did technically disown myself from the family so—

damian: disown yourself?

(name): i have every reason to—

dick: look, baby bird, you don't know what's right for you, these guys are dangerous—

(name): i literally got nearly killed by some nobody criminals if not for harley saving me but okay, nightwing.

bruce, whose attention is now on (name): you almost got what now?

(name), rolling their eyes: i almost died, batman. now if you excuse me, i think i deserve a good night sleep tonight.

(name), looks at harley who still hasn't released them from the protective hug: can we?

harley quinn, facepalming in her mind as she stares back at (name): oh, i should've bought you to pam and selina instead.

[nosyrobin]

Y/N: My ex is crazy, y'all. I've had him blocked on everything for weeks and yet he still manages to find ways to contact me.

Y/N: *turns camera to microwave* Bro this what i'm talking about look. He’s calling me on my microwave how was that even…. I didn't know microwaves could do- How is he doing that?

Y/N: That actually impressive you go girl.

[superbat-love]

Diana: I think I might be attracted to this guy, you know? He just seems like a good family man.

Clark: There’s nothing more attractive than a man who is protective of his family.

Diana: [nudges him playfully] Is that what attracted you to Bruce?

Clark: Of course! One time, I walked into the cafeteria, and suddenly the whole room turned red. Out of nowhere, Bruce came charging in, bodyslammed me to the ground, and kept yelling, “Stay away from my son!”

Diana:

Clark: We rolled around on the floor for a bit until some people managed to pull him off me. Turns out he thought Dick and I were dating. Luckily, the misunderstanding was cleared up once Bruce was trapped in a Lantern ring construct, and I finally had a chance to explain everything to him. Good times.

Diana: …Wow.

Clark: That was the moment I realized just how protective Bruce is of his family. And honestly, it made me admire him even more.

Diana: Maybe we need to reevaluate our attraction to “protective family men.”

[ironicallyyn]

Mc: hey Lucifer.. wanna see something funny?

Lucifer: ... Sure?

Mc: shout

Lucifer: (shouts... But nothing happens) ?

Mc: (shouts)

Mammon, Levi and Asmo barged into the room: I HEARD SHOUTING!! MC ARE YOU OKAY!!??

[dontbesoweirdkira]

How would Platonic! Yan! Batfamily react to Reader with Narcolepsy?

A/N:Thank you for requesting. I hope I did okay with this, please respectfully correct me if I got anything wrong or unintentionally offensive with this as I do not suffer from narcolepsy.

Warnings: Toxic and abusive family dynamics, infantalization, medication tampering, worsening issues

Masterlist

Requests: always open

Oh my gosh that would be the worse thing to deal with in a Yan! family. Especially with one as affectionate as them.

Can you imagine trying to avoid Dick or Tim but just falling right asleep in their arms from the stress...then when you wake up moments later, they aren't allowing you to leave their grasp...oh how terrifying that'd be.

Anyways, they are rather attentive to your needs and observant. If one of the siblings notice that you are showing signs that you will abruptly collapse, they will rush over and quickly guide you to a safe area where you can rest.

The family is very strict on not giving you certain tasks that may be hard on your body. Especially if you deal with cataplexy. If you need help with moving something, or completing a task, just ask someone. They will be very upset if you get yourself hurt.

The down side of not having great muscle control or overall weakness is the constant babying. They treat you as if you were made out of glass. It can be quite annoying when you need to strengthen your muscles even if it's very difficult for you. They also might enjoy keeping you weak and vulnerable because you have less of a chance to escape and no real ability to fight back. You are far to precious to not be in their care.

Your family is strict about not allowing you to hang out with friends and staying only in the home. Occasionally they'll allow you to have a supervised visit. They even may force you to take up schooling at home and you're not allowed to work. It's all far too dangerous when they aren't near to assist you. You cannot trust anyone outside of them.

If you suffer with hallucinations, whether that may be audio or visual, they will be very understanding. You aren't the only one in the family to suffer with symptoms like such. Many days Jason and Bruce are struggling with those things. I can't imagine anyone would poke fun, they'd just redirect you.

But his can kind of suck given that sometimes you cannot tell if something that happened was real or not. Your family may say that you were just having a hallucination but you swear that you heard them talking about tampering with your meds.

Speaking of such, they most definitely do. The medicine that is supposed to help with your EDS seems to have the opposite effect on you. Some days it seems like you've been sleeping for weeks. You swore that you feel asleep in the living room...why are you now in an entirely different sect of the mansion..???

If you suffer with memory issues, that will be a huge problem because so many things they get away with or manipulate you about and because you have no recollection of any events..you are just forced to go with it, even if your gut says something is wrong.

Sometimes the family can get a bit worried if you are up all night..they worry you might wonder off or get hurt while they are either on patrol or sleeping so one designated person must be up with you at all times.

Even when you're sleeping. Someone is monitoring you and your health. Usually Alfred or one of the siblings if they are free.

Often Tim will take the shift since he is usually home and doing work anyways. Too many times have you randomly woken up in his dark room with him in the corner watching you.

Your constant fatigue is an excuse your siblings may use to just carry you around without your consent. Yes, you were struggling up the stairs. but no. you didn't really want Dick to just come and pick you up and carry you around the house like a pet. It's worse when it's Jason because he throws you over his shoulder...he's working on it.

Alfred has a specialty diet for you, which kind of sucks sometimes when the others are eating your favorites. But it's for the best he tells you. It's supposed to help with your symptoms but...every time you eat his cooking, you just feel sick then super drowsy..Alfred says it's the adjustment period to the new diet..but you can't shake the feeling that the food is worsening your conditions

[kiame-sama]

Darling: *immediately gives their name, says thank you, accepts all gifts, and happily eats the food given to them*

Yan!Malleus: *sweats in Fae*

[yandereloveraw]

My yandere shapeshifter self insert: I made sure that I can be whatever you want me to be. I can change anything about myself that you don't like, okay? Just let me know, and I can do that for you. ♡

[talkbycolor]

Sol: I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response. MC: Wow. They sound stupid. Sol: But they’re not. They’re really smart actually. Just dense. MC: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!��� Sol: I guess you’re right. Hey MC, I love you. MC: See! Just say that! Sol: Holy fucking shit. MC: If that flies over their head then, sorry Sol, but they're too dumb for you. Sol: MC.

[yandereunsolved]

Parental figure reader accidentally collecting all of the pathetic meow meow yandere nobles—

Yandere Aemond: "It is good to speak with you again. I-I... uhm... would you like to brush and braid my hair again? I-I only ask because you were so fond of doing it the first time." awkwardly holding a brush in his hand and looking at you like a child eagerly waiting for the approval of their guardian.

Yandere Aegon: "Apologies, brother. As the king, I request that they join me in the garden so that we may go over... plans." Just wants to cuddle them and needs a coverup.

Yandere Lucerys: "They promised to teach me how to tie different sailor knots! You even said that we could go explore the harbor, some beaches, and other stuff!"

Yandere Helaena: "Our bugs? You said you would help me catalog all of my new bugs in our special notebook. There is no possible way for the ink to meet the page and create words otherwise. You are the keeper of the parchment. The one who can hold a quill with far more skill than I."

Yandere Jacaerys sitting in the chair next to reader having been possessively by their side the entire day. "If it so pleases them, they should stay here with me. They have had such an exhausting week, and the morrow will be even busier for them."

Yandere Baela and Rhaena are allowed to cling onto reader because Jacaerys doesn't want to seem jealous of them in front of you.

[acid-ixx]

(name) wayne, gagged and tied to a chair:

the villain, untying their gag: hahaha! i have kidnapped you for ransom and your father only has 5 hours left to save you by paying me!!!

(name) wayne: damn bruh my father hasn't spoken to me in 13 and a half years i don't think he's coming for me at all, better if you shoot me instead lmao cause i don't think batman would save me either

villain: ...

yan! villain, untying your ropes: welp, kidnapping is basically illegal adoption, am i right?

(name) wayne: as long as i'm fed three times a day and you read me bed time stories before i sleep then i guess that counts?

yan! villain: sweetheart, you are getting more than that.

[luxthestrange]

RoR Incorrect quotes#188 No thoughts head empty stare

Y/n*Sitting beside him giggles seeing your villager and his villager from Animal Crossing get married* Til death do us part, right, Puppy?

Anubis*Who thinks they're actually married now and grins at you* It's cute you think death can separate us~

[steor-ra]

Jason: you think you could make me fold just by being stupid and cooing disgusting spit bubbles?

Jason: well you're...!

Baby!Y/n babbling and cooing at bigbro jayjay while making grabby hands at him. Trying to reach his face and puckering her lips: hmmh

Jason: –So so right! AWE BABY! *smashes his cheek to theirs and proceeds to rub against it*

Meanwhile Tim is sipping coffee in his room as he watches from the camera the newfound blackmail for his jerk of a brother

[my-names-angel-but-im-not-one]

Petty mc #4

*everyone playing the guessing game in HOL*

MC: alright guys guess who am I?

Everyone: okay!

MC: *starts to slouch* ""yeah Lilith died because of God , now I'll never forgive humans , even though they have nothing to do with it!!"" *Starts to fake strangle themselves*

Everyone:

MC: alright guess now that was a pretty good acting !

Belphie: *sweating* I don't like this game anymore.....