#immediate funeral

[averaillisa]

[welcometothedaddyissuescult]

quite honestly if bruce doesn’t want to kill the joker, the best way for him to deal with him and ensure he never hurts anyone ever again is to build an underground one room bunker that’s soundproof and made of lead in the middle of the sahara or the amazon, drop his ass inside with like 100ish years worth of supplies, weld the door shut, and then walk away. he never tells anyone what he’s done and he never writes it down anywhere. that information lives only in his head because he knows no one will ever be able to torture that information out of him. i think the only person he might have to give a vague heads up to is superman. because if clark sees a underground bunker made of lead he’s definitely checking it out. so, i think bruce would just be like

bruce: hey, clark, just so you know there is an underground bunker in the middle of the amazon and it’s made of lead and it contains the most dangerous thing on the planet. it must never be opened.

and because it’s clark, he would be like: do you know what exactly is inside it?

bruce: yes.

clark: and to keep the world safe, i just have to do nothing and ignore it?

bruce: yes.

clark: okay.

eventually everyone would forget about the joker and on his deathbed, he’d tell dick about the bunker and dick would tell jason. together dick and jason would go and pry it open and just see a very old joker laying in his bed still laughing and without blinking jason would just shoot him in the head, they would reseal the bunker, leave, and never discuss it again.

but that will never happen because of bruce’s dogmatic and immovable morality. he will always catch the joker, he will always give him a trial, and he will always send him back to arkham. but if i got control of dc comics i would make him do this.

[eightbitpale]

I just rewatched the rako hardeen arc and it once again hits me how incredibly fucked up that was. Like good lord what were they thinking

And I say this not in a Jedi critical way per se but more in a Jedi flabbergasted way??

Bc clearly at SOME POINT the council had a conversation about what to do about the whole chancellor-assassination-plot thing, and what i want to know is whose pitch was “hey Kenobi what if we hire a bounty hunter to shoot you off a roof in front of your padawan and grandpadawan, then we hold a fake funeral for you (to which we will invite your ex/our political rival, and also not Cody) and then we use the machine from the 1997 Action Thriller Face/Off starring Nick Cage and John Travolta to violently transmutate you into the aforementioned bounty hunter (whom we will have in the meantime arrested) then after a brief stay in Supermax Spaceprison you can infiltrate Count Dooku’s secret team-building saw trap cube (designed by famed criminal mastermind Stabbada Badguyman) in order to save the galaxy. Do you. Do you think you’d be up for that”

And obi-wan, fresh off Zyggeria and about halfway through the worst year of his life is just like

[manga-and-stuff]

Source: Fullmetal Alchemist Hagane no Renkinjutsushi 鋼の錬金術師

by Hiromu Arakawa

[yumedoca]

A bouquet of flowers.. 💐

[mrmeepsmadmind]

Metalhawk: bro stop calling my people NAILS

Starscream: if you tase me im gonna make u my dead wife istg

Wheeljack: why do your optics turn separate directions whenever i mention the word 'plan'.

Ratchet: yeah i have arthritis so idc if i die tbh :/

rodimus: im buying an rv and me and all these strangers (who like me more than u, not that it matters ) (im hot) are gonna * EXPLODES EVERYONE *

wheeljack, in the middle of discussing a very elaborate pain-staking plan:... ... something just exploded & i wasn't the cause 😢...

prowl: WHERE IS YOUR RAGE

needlenose: i sure love my big dumb evil husband. sure hope a disgruntled little popcorn kernel doesn't detonate a bomb in his head

Wheeljack: fuck my life

Starscream: i love lying, so, naturally-- im gonna become a politician.

ironhide: i saw the hat man

the intelligent Bumble (bee):

[3liza]

it's so nasty when they tan the natural redheads in Hollywood and their lips and gums and eyelids look sort of a sickly greyish lavender. you can tell it's unnatural and they're suffering

[sapphoismymuse]

don’t imagine the dwarves reprising misty mountains at thorin, kíli, and fíli’s funeral

don’t imagine how instead of thorin leading, bilbo does, recalling thorin’s voice all those nights ago from the other room

don’t imagine everyone’s voices cracking as they sing about the journey and all the things they went through together

don’t imagine how wrong it feels, missing three of their voices in the harmonies

[hanzajesthanza]

i feel like i just got so used to ciri and how natural ciri and geralt’s relationship left, via being introduced to the witcher via witcher 3, and then reading the middle of the saga before i finished the short stories…

that i never really innately picked up on the fact that ciri turning out to be geralt’s daughter and not his son was… uhm, part of the entire surprise, let’s put it that way :’)

geralt and ciri are just soooo natural as a father and daughter duo that i can’t imagine it any other way, if ciri had been a boy this would have been way less remarkable as a series, there would be no witcher series as we know it. so to me ciri being a girl was the normal and default, expected way things were supposed to go.

even when i read a question of price-sword of destiny-something more for the first times, i was like “ok” when ciri being a girl was a switch of expectations: geralt (and, supposedly, the reader) having expected pavetta to have a son. like… “alright, it’s a girl, so what.”

i had to be informed about how this was an intentional shock… not only because i’m not a parent, but i mean, well, ultrasounds get mixed up all the time, right… it’s not so uncommon to have a kid and be surprised by the gender…

and because of this, i was more inclined to eyeroll at blood of elves being preachy with going over ciri’s biological sex what seemed like ten million times in chapters two and three… what with the whole “daughter has her first period” subplot, ciri upset over her lack of potential strongmanship, and the witchers mostly relying on triss for guidance in raising a girl. the moral being both “just raise her like any other child” and “be sensitive to her needs that you’re blind to…”

although i still think these segments have visibly aged and date the series (not inherently a bad thing, just a quality of it)… they do make more sense when i try to empathize more with the perspective of a new father… who didn’t know he was receiving a girl… who thought she died… who only got her back through a miracle… and having to raise a girl… that’s not a young child anymore, not yet a teen, but is very shortly going to start going through puberty?! it’s like growing up in the desert, just learning what water is, and then getting thrown into the ocean.

because “having to raise a girl” still doesn’t seem that strange to me, but then i remember geralt didn’t see a woman and only had heard about them as a concept until he was an adult (because “warrior-monk” realness), he grew up with a hole in his heart that his absent mother bore, he lives in a highly gendered society, he experiences hostility from everybody of course but especially from women and girls, who take fright at him for… specific reasons explained by the old women in edge of the world…

no, geralt’s not helpless, but i forget, because he acts normal, but… (i mean, although he has issues, he could have really gone off his rocker with regards to women, a little sacrifice confirms this and vilgefortz embodies this) i forget that geralt’s inexperience with women… mostly manifesting in anxiety and both uncertain and impulsive behavior… like ghosting with a nosegay of flowers, the “dear friend” and all… would affect his view of the gender as a whole, including how he sees ciri. and it does.

in his situation, yes, having to raise a girl does intensify the element of “what the fuck am i doing”. especially as a single dad.

and although i do like it when the pov shifts from geralt in the saga but just to another person in the room, for how he becomes more of a distant and enigmatic figure, seeing him through others’ eyes always makes fills me with this uncertainty. buuuut, i would fucking adore blood of elves chapters two and three through geralt’s eyes just for how much of an emotional wreck he must have been… and trying not to show it to her :(

[vaguely-concerned]

can't wait for adaar to come back to cassandra after a decade of being best friends with dorian 'thedas' nr 1 mortaboo necrostan' pavus and then hanging out with a bunch of mourn watchers through all of veilguard and embracing her like 'I love and support you more than anyone in this world and whatever you needed from them that you didn't get I'll wrestle dragons and fight gods to give you now, my love, my lighthouse, my safest place to stand. but I must regretfully report that your folks fucking ROCK actually I think dorian was right about this one'

[heylittleriotact]

It takes a while, but one of the Lighthouse gang finally realizes that Emmrich and Amina offer different transactional greetings and farewells than most people.

Seriously, they almost never say “Good morning/afternoon/evening” to anyone. Instead a polite “Hello” or “Greetings” is offered.

They notably steer clear of “Goodbye,” and “Farewell,” and never encourage anyone to have a nice day. Instead they simply say, “Take care.”

It’s Neve who puts it together: bidding a person who’s just lost someone a good morning might come across as callous, even if it was meant with the best of intentions. Even the word ‘goodbye’ might be salt in the wound of a broken heart.

[choices-binglebonkus]

I still want to write a top ten list of the most inappropriate/socially unacceptable times the MC and LI in any story have had sex, but there’s so many options at this point that I don’t even know what to include anymore.

[averaillisa]

🤗

[good-beanswrites]

" @oboetemasuka , I've taken too much of a beating from you to stand idle any longer! It's time to bring out the big guns..." The big guns being a 200 word piece that made me cry in the middle of the night -_- This is a direct sequel to Myosotis (fic about the prisoners returning to their lives post-Milgram.) TW for referenced child death

“Ooh, I found Mahiru-san!” Yuno clicked through the woman’s social media page. She winced that most of them were couples’ photos. “It looks like she’s still at the flower shop – she posted earlier today! So, what do you think is the best way to…” she trailed off, seeing the horror on Fuuta’s face.

He was absorbed in his own phone, scrolling with a shaking hand. He’d gone entirely pale. He shook his head. His lips moved, unable to form any words. 

Yuno didn’t dare ask what he saw. She’d known right away. She reached across the table to touch his arm. 

When he finally slid the phone toward her, she only glanced at a few lines in the news article he’d clicked on – “Tragic Accident in Fukuoka,” “only days after the first loss,” “she was discovered early Thursday morning,” “officials name faulty electrical wiring,” “congregation holds private service” – before she had to turn away. 

Fuuta’s expression was numb, his eyes unfocused. 

“I told…” His voice hitched. “I told her she could come live with me. I told her we would –” 

“I know, Fuuta.”

He looked down at the screen, at the photo alongside the obituary. 

In it, she was smiling.

[twistedshipper]

♦ i've been waiting for this day, so i'll be wearing white at your funeral ♦

[sqrkyclean]

I probably won’t do much art today, sorry