#im not spending as much time with my family as i used to
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Marinette Salt Prompts: Truth and Lies if they did it again.
Ok so I just saw Ilustrhater today and I ... well I feel that this prompt writes itself doesn't it?
After Alya left with Nino to go investigate the new wielder of the Butterfly Miraculous, Marinette was left alone with Adrien. Sure, Marinette was unsure about what to do, but it would be fine! All she had to do was talk to him ... right?
Well, that seemed to be impossible for Marinette. Unable to talk to her ACTUAL boyfriend, Marinette decided to run off, having used a nearby fire as an excuse to transform, leaving Adrien alone at the cinema for two WHOLE hours because transforming and running off was TOTALLY better idea than asking Adrien what he wanted out of their relationship.
Of course, she was REALLY sorry when she came back to find Adrien still standing there and the movie had already finished, so she tried to make it up to him by bringing him to a nearby cafe. Hopefully that would fix the rest of the day...
Only for that to fail when Marinette once again was unable to talk to her boyfriend. Having ordered some wierd cookies and having accidentally kicked Adrien under the table, she decided to run off again and transform to help Sabrina with a cat stuck in a tree.
It was coincidental that an akuma chose to appear sometime after and Ladybug was there to stop it, but by the time she had detransformed, the ENTIRE DAY had passed without a single bit of communication with Adrien.
Sometime later, Marinette invited Adrien out to another movie, but when he finally got there, Marinette was shocked to find that he had no interest in watching a movie. Instead, he was here to break up with her.
As Marinette and Adrien stood over a bridge, Marinette was starting to tear up as Adrien explained he had no interest in this relationship anymore. Between having lost his father and having been in a prior relationship with Kagami, Adrien told her that as much as he cared about Marinette, he was not willing to put himself in a relationship where his S.O. would run off on him like that, especially since he had already done that to Kagami unintentionally. He missed his father, sure, but he could not forget how his father practically avoided him for most of his life since his mother's death.
Of course, Marinette tried to talk him out of it. Saying that she cares for him, that she had a good reason for running off that day, that he was someone very important to her, but Adrien was having none of that.
Adrien: I still don't understand. Why would you run away? We were supposed to spend the day with each other and just have a good time.
Marinette: I just .... im sorry.... I have no idea how I'm supposed to act in a relationship.
Adrien: Well... admittedly I don't really know either, but I thought that we could have tried to figure this out together. That if I just spent the day with you, I could figure out how to be good enough for you.
Marinette: We still can Adrien. You are good enough, great enough even! Just please ... stay with me. Trust Me.
Adrien: I... I can't. When you left me alone that day... I felt like I lost my family again for the third time. First my mother, then my father, and now the person I love went out of my life. You're telling me to trust you, but how can I trust you when you run off like this? Can I trust that you will stay by my side when I feel the same way? I.... no. I'm sorry Marinette, but this is over. Between everything that happened and now this... I don't think I can be in love again. Not for a while.
Adrien left Marinette in the twilight of Paris, not looking back even as the Heroine of Paris wept and grieved.
#miraculous ladybug#miraculous ladybug salt#miraculous ladybug salt prompts#marinette salt#marinette salt prompts#marinette salt prompt#adrien sugar#submission
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plate of sambusa is the new fruit bowl
#a few days ago mama walked in with piping hot sambusa#this was like 10 in the am#and i dont eat when im stressed#(sometimes i stress eat but thats beside the point)#anyway i could have cried#it was so simple but my feels and the rest of me were already on the verge of collapse#im not spending as much time with my family as i used to#always in my room hunched over books only seeing them at mealtimes#family ocassions are express (which we dont mind actually lol)#and to think that it only gets worse from here just *hurts*#i wonder if one day ill look back and think i should have done more#prioritised my family and spent more quality time with them#will i regret this?#will i lie awake at night and go over my every waking second spent away from them thinking how i could have balanced things better?#will i take initiative to change my life for the better or mope around and wait for the worst to happen only to then#find some semblance of comfort knowing there was little i could do to change the outcome and that this was bound to happen?#im tired#mostly of myself#why am i so careless?#why isnt fear motivating me to do more anymore?#it feels like the word proactive has been permanently replaced with procrastinate in my lexicon. and i hate it#its going to be my end i just know it#why am i like this?#anyway im going to eat a donut now#see yall soon#:)
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bobby says to eddie one shift where buck is home sick with chris. going home to see your boys? eddie smiles and says. yeah. and your boys just Sticks in eddies brain and when he gets home he sees chris and buck curled up on the couch asleep and the sight makes him pause cuz. yeah. those are his boys
#dont get me wrong#im obsessed with buck referring to chris and eddie as his diaz boys but you know eddie would also love calling buck and chris his boys#so he just. calls them that all the time#at a 118 barbeque hes like. well i gotta go round up my boys its time for us to head out.#or buck and chris go to the zoo over the weekend and hes showing hen pics buck sent and shes like. looks like your boys had a good time#and hes like. yeah 😊😊 they did#hes on the phone with abuela and shes like. howre your boys doing??#and eddie is just 🥰🥰 theyre great#he gets home from a 48 he picked up to buck and chris about to sit down for dinner and eddie goes in for hugs (that chris dodges)#and hes just like. i missed my boys#he just loves his family so much. the thought of leaving his boys together makes him so happy because he loves chris and he loves buck#and he loves that they love each other and that they both love him. and so hes always just like. my boys are spending the day together 🥰🥰#hes the guy thats sooo in love with his family and everyone knows and its sooo sweet to the point that it makes people a little sick#a firefighter from b shift chats with him during a shift change and the guy walks away from the conversation being like. i know eddie has a#perfect little family that he loves so much but i didnt know it was like. That perfect and sweet. what a lucky guy. what a beautiful family#because the guy told him to thank buck for the cookies he baked and eddie was like yeah. my boys made a mess of the kitchen making those#and started talking bout chris and buck and how they team up against him and never let him taste the dough (but they eat spoonfuls)#ofc we know buck is prob always saying. gotta go see my diaz boys. or. im making lasagna for my diaz boys tonight#and eddies like. buck you know youre a diaz boy too#yeah. okay. but you and chris are MY diaz boys#me thinks
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gen loss dump part 2 :]
i have a gen loss playlist so the last two was me hitting randomize and drawing a pic based on the song before it finished. the second one technically isn’t that cause charlie’s inferno isn’t on apple music cause they hate me so it’s way more of the song out of spite because they wouldn’t give it to me.
#spotify is prolly better (definitely is for finding playlists i use spotify to find playlists still and then add those songs to my own lmao#but dad pays for a family apple music subscription and free music streaming is infinitely better then paying for my own spotify#also my wound reference i feel like i let him off easy from the seven foot tall wire security monster#but idk this was drawn a year ago idk what i was doing#like i agree w the vest just being REALLLL bad bruising and internal stuff but i feel like he had wayyyy more open area besides that to get#fucked up besides just his arms#but i guess since the wire monster also got turned off by the button since it didn’t immediately go at ranboo next then maybe that’s still#reasonable idk#generation loss#generation loss fanart#ranboo fanart#continuing my not spamming tags trend so even though i bc puls have tagged all three of them im not gonna#still posting this primarily for me and for everyone else second#OH THE OUTFITS ARE FROM MY PIN BOARDS#I MAKE OUTFIT BOARDS FOR EVERYTHING ITS SO FUN#LIKE EVERY FANDOM IVE POSTED HERE HAS ONE#ITS BAD#and then irl i wear sweats and t shirt lmao#i found mouse trap game board earrings#i spend too much time on those finding highly specific bullshit#the jrwi one is especially cringe cause i have a different section for all of the what ifs#and that shit lasted one (1) episode#also the full color drawing i’m so >:| about it#i need to practice coloring sooooo badly but i always get frustrated w it#i need to slow tf down idk#but thats also from nearly a year ago so
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Ouhhhh friendship I love friendship……..
#I’m reading volumes 14-16 of the ouran manga OOUGHHH MY HEART#I love this weird little friend group so much its unreal#like u have this charming sweeps you off your feet prince but he’s actually a huge lovable idiot with a kind heart and his friends#who are all misfits that he reached out to and drew in because of his kindness and own weirdness like that shits TIGHT BRO#and the trauma part where he has some deep seated issues with love bc he thinks that itll break a family apart like with his mom#how his family isnt allowed to be together because his mom and dad fell in love and how he says he wants to build a big house#so that way one day everyone will get along as a family like. all he wants is not to lose everyone and the only way to do that is#by maintaining a certain order.. he both wants a complete family so bad and doesnt want anything to sour between anyone#so he assigns each of his friends a family role based on how he sees them and YEAH its mostly played for giggles and tamakis#already weird so its his way of showing theyre close to him but. god damn this boy has LAYERS#it also feels kinda meta towards how found family tends to get thrown around to assign characters as 'siblings' or family roles instead of#using it to describe characters who are close enough to be each others family. cuz tamakis doing that EXACT THING in a way tht#ties in with his character and i have to say its fascinating using that within the story itself and its completely plausible#theres a lot of things i can say about ouran that are good bad and questionable but. god i love it when characters are niceys to each other#i remember i really liked the mall episode bc kyoya and haruhi got to spend time together and their relationship isnt very close#but it was really nice to see their personalities bounce off each other. i think i also wouldve liked to see haruhi alone with kaoru#i also firmly believe all of the hosts are at least a little in love with haruhi and this can be anything like endearing romantic cuz like#who DOESNT love haruhi. kyoya i think would want to study her under a microscope like his fascination with her draws him in#but im fucking obsessed with whatever haruhi and tamaki have going on because YES hes obsessed with her YES he jumps at the chance to#put her in a cute costume but haruhi? she just fucking goes with it because she knows hes fun to be around even if hes a little wacky abt i#theyre all so. NNGGHHHH#ouran#ohshc#yapping
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Currently having a breakdancing session with myself<333
#im Turing 21 tomorrow#im gonna cry#I don’t want to spend time with my family#i don’t understand#they don’t even like me xjsjhjdhs#its sad that the moment I move away I’ll be low contact with all of them://#my life is going no where#I want to leave#but I’m disabled and not mentally stable enough dndjhdjxks#but they just think I’m lazy#like bro I have doctors appointments smsmjsks#I faint when I’m out in public#i hate my birthday#so much#im not in the closet but at this point I wish I was sjjsjdks#the only reason I’m still home and not kicked out is because my dad cared well he tires#my mother would have kicked me out#girlie gonna kicked me out for shaving my head#and getting a binder#both my parents are transphobic but they’re both different kinds of transphobe#dad is ignorant transphobia#mother fucking dislikes us teehee#she’d rather kick me out#can’t believe I let this women beat the shit out of me everyday for 13 years#whelp#im not ready to be 21#I wasn’t ready to be 20#I wasn’t ready to be 18#I suck at everything wtf dnmdnddm#man idk why I’m still kicking tbh
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[ㅁ]
#i'm updating the family birthday and anniversary calendar as a christmas gift for my grandparents and#it's kinda just driving home how very much i am in a different stage of life than the majority of my cousins :/#like.#oldest uncle's kids: married with kids; married with kid; single with chickens; living with SO; expecting a baby#other uncle's kids: married with kid; married; dating#one aunt's kids: married with 4 kids; married with kids; married with kid; married with newborn#another aunt's kids: married with kids; married with kid; married with foster kid; married with kids; single; in high school#and then my family is me (single) and blue (single)#and yes i know there is some degree of cultural difference (my aunts and their families are still in the huldeman church)#and some degree of age difference (blue and i are among the youngest cousins on this side)#but it's still kind of a. bittersweet? idk. a weird feeling. to know that they're all building their own families and i'm just. me.#don't get me wrong i'm not discontented with where i am in life#i just sometimes spend time with them and wish i could have that (husband who loves me and cooks&hosts with me and adorable kids) too#idk i'm just in my feelings a bit rn#also like. i don't actually know most of my cousins kids? heck i haven't seen some of my cousins in years#so there's also a bit of 'we used to be close but now you're off doing your own thing with your own little family'#'and im still here just being me'#about
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im so annoyed with everything today, i think i need some tasty food and a million hours of sleep and then I'll be back to normal
#the teacher at the first class today was so dibsjdhdhdhdhsgs 😫#like she was teaching us things that are like unrelated to the class that shes teaching so idek why she was teaching it#but also its things that we have been learning since the 1st semester and we've done them in at least 10 classes and she was acting like#this was the 1st time we were hearing about it#like oh yeah we're on the 7th semester of studying nutrition but no one bothered to tell us how many calories are in a gram of fat#and she gave us homework 'to see if we know this' like#oh yes i can make a meal plan for a child with crohns or cystic fibrosis or celiac disease or everything else we've done this semester and#all the other semesters but i guess i cant tell you what micronutrients are in this one breakfast meal#like fuck off and stick to what you're supposed to be teaching#anyway i know im getting more annoyed than i should but she was just even more annoying than usual today#like she interrupted the lesson every 5 minutes to yell at someome to be quiet i wasnt even aware there were people talking until she yelled#anyway#also my new earphones aren't working well idk why ive definitely not been mistreating them that much for them to break in less than a month#like i had my old pair for at least 4 years until the broke and i dont think the wire got cut in them like the sound was coming out weird#but there was sound coming out. in the new ones you need to hold them in a very specific angle for sound to come out#and like im careful with how i put them away so what is up with them?#my theory is that they make wired earphones shitty on purpose so that you will spend a lot of money and buy wireless#also we had said from Tuesday that we would hang out with my friends today but i guess they forgot or idk and they made other plans#(to go home and sleep) and during the weekend the one friend wont be here and next week my family will be here so we probably wont hang out#again until next year and we have exams almost immediately so we wont be hanging out much then either#also my period is supposed to come soon and i hope that it will either come today or it will wait until after Christmas#ideally it will never come ever again but we cant always get what we want#anyway im gonna go eat the rest of my μεσογειακό and go take a nap#jo says stuff#personal ramblings
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i need the donkey quotient in my life to rise
#my friend wants us to half-move to her familys ranch on a mountain which is the most sacred place of my life and im thinking about#the donkeys that live there and how much i love spending time with them and how if we do spend longer times i want to learn donkey skills#i want to go gather firewood with them… a long walk in the woods with a donkey… youre kiddingggg
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its so embarassing likee. going to talk abt a feeling you have but you already know ppl will be like Oh that sounds like depression lol and its like. well yes . i know . trust me i am so aware i am depressed . but its still like a thing ive been thinking abt and wanting to talk abt but ik itll just be like Ok hun 👍. idk idk what response i would want tho ig FNFNFNF
#not anything serious i was just thinking how like. idk. this is gonna sound rly stupid#but for me personally like. sometimes. How do i phrase this without sounding rly evil#i think obv ppl can spend their money however they want but like. its kind of hard 4 me to grasp sometimes like. there r things that ppl#spend a lot of money on bc it makes them happy like umm. vacations or pets or hobbies or whathaveyou. and obviously thats fine but#i iust feel like its all so. temporary and like. idk. idt im ohrasing this right at all i just likee. the thought of working all year to#afford to take a vacation and then working again to afford another vacation just makes me feel like i want to die. like. idk... i like#vacations we dont need to go on them a lot but ig its just like. everything we do just feels like a waste of time. not in like a Ohh you#should be doing more work Obviously its just like. idk. maybe it is just me. but i feel like im just waiting until i die and can be done#with it i guess. and everything i do is just to fill time until that happens. yk ? which is silly bc of my whole. Thing i cant talk abt#but ppl talk abt like. going out and partying or going on vacation or whatever and i like. I like those things its nice when they happen#but they dont rly make me longterm any happier i guess. everything just feels like another thing im doing. idk. this rly isnt coming out the#way it is in my head. and Again i know this is just depression shit or whatever im just like. its all exhausting. it just makes me feel so#tired. to think abt working and working and working so i can pay to be alive and i can save to do one fun thing every so often to keep me#sane enough to keep working and working and working and i probably wont ever be able to retire itll just be. work. and then ill die. yk.#but i feel like the vacations and stuff dont like. refresh me very much. maybe its just bc ive only been on one 'vacation' as an adult and#it was just like. coming home to see my family. and realizing id have to move back home yk..#+ like. my mom nd my gran taking me out for a weekend when i lived up there#nd those things were nice and all but once its over its like. it doesnt fuel me to keep going it doesnt make me feel any better abt having#to work for the rest of my life#ik im being ridiculous bc im literally unemployed and i cant even get up off my ass to get my stupid fucking ged so i can get a job and be#Useful to my family its just like. idk.... i try so hard to be like Oh nothing mayters and thats why everything matters type thing like. Yes#all things end and the point is to just try to be happy until it does#but i feel like it just doesnt happen for me. i feel like any happiness i feel is so insanely like. it happens and then its gone. and its#back to just. the knowledge that im still fucking stuck here. and i will be until it happens. yk. i play video games tomoass the time until#i go back to sleep then i wake up and i make a spreadsheet to pass the time until i go back to sleep#and everyday just feels like passing the time until i go back to sleep and itll just keep going until it happens. and its nice to have nice#days but whats like. the point. yk. everything just ends#IDK. this is all very whiny im sry. ive just been feeling it a lot lately . i hope this doesnt feel like me being like Ohhh you ppl r so#dumb participating in hobbies and going out and having fun dont you know yr gonna DIE? thats not what im trying to be like#its just like. i feel like it doesnt make me as happy as it does other ppl like. none of it refreshes me or makes me want to keep going
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the pros of going to my grandmothers funeral/celebration of life tomorrow: closure or whatever. i dont really know ive only been to two funerals in my whole life and i dont fully get what im suppsed to feel and do there
the cons: i dont talk to literally anyone on my moms side of the family. i could follow my brother around but he's gonna be mostly around my mom, who i do not talk to for a thousand reasons. and my ex-neighbors who are very openly transphobic to me will be around her. and no one on her side of the family really Gets that im trans either so like it just all sucks. i will surely get emotional because y'know, and that means that i will be emotional in front of my mom, which is bad for me. all my cousins are weird around me because we were close as kids but now no one knows how to approach me because ive only gotten more awkward and more unable to verbally speak
#i was being so brave about it but then i accidentally ran into my mom in the store#and i was forced to talk to her#and now i am filled with so much dread and i really dont want to see her again#and the whole neighbors thing is so stressful bc like. they speak about trans issues (slash deragotory) in front of me#they purposefully misgender and deadname me#they try to poke at me because i cant rise back to say anything to them and so i guess maybe theyre trying to “its just a phase” me#or something idk#and i know if my dad knew this he would be understanding of me not wanting to spend anymore time there then necessary#but its so. embarassing i guess. how do i tell my dad that these people hate me for who i am#how do i tell my dad theyve talked about how theyd disown their child if they were trans very cruelly in front of me#i guess its not that embarassing because it makes me angry but i would also probably cry explaining it all#and then THAT would be embarassing#and it makes me feel soooooooooo isolated whenever im around family that i used to be close to#like wow. damn. i really am just not like the other girls (and by girls i mean just everyone)#idk. idk#also let it be known i know the part of funerals is also sharing stories and everything but i cannot speak to people#and i especially cannot do it when its about something emotional#they dont know that speaking verbally is already overwhelming so my emotions just become uncontrolled#uuurgghhghghh. idk#the misery
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i love being drunk :)
#problems??? idk her!!!!#money??? sorry.... my mommys paying for me today#i get drunk and get lovey dovey so im gonna be lovey dovey on here#so SO fucking happy i deleted twitter because it sucked and provided no happiness in my life#so SO fucking happy im drinking with family & spending so much time with my family#i LOVE !!!! L O V E !!!! my family they are amazing i adore them so fucking much god bless them all#@ my grandma up in heaven.... i hope you are watching from above and seeing just how much we all adore and love each other so much#it is so nice to relax and get drink with people that love you#ALSO!!!!! ALSO!!!!! ALSO!!!!!! i just ADOREEEEEEE georgie ◇♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡#hes the love of my life.... the LOVE of MY life#i just adore him#i thank god that michael introduced us#even tho i have my qualms with him thank god he introduced us im so happy i have george in my life#i know im ungrateful and a brat and dont deserve a lot but the eay the fate aligned enough for us to meet.... i could start crying#i love him so much#ive never been so in love... i thought that wasnt possible#i love him#me.... in love w a man.... wow#and hes PERFECT!!!!!! I ADORE HIM!!!!!#i love the love we've cultivated...... god bless george may his soul feel light forever and always and more#i love u george#personal
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there’s a lot of things im not enjoying about my life right now but i think the worst one is that i don’t have anything to talk about other than how miserable and tired and unmotivated i am
#im exaggerating a bit. the only positive and changing thing in my life is my dog#but like. this really is just 8 weeks of constant suckage#[ context. im in school to be a cpa while working full time. i have quite literally 0 free time. this will continue until about sept 2025 ]#i keep spiralling into questioning myself on why im even doing this#like deep down. i dont think society as it stands is going to last into my 40s. so why am i wasting my 20s on The Grind#spending my life until i turn 26 hustlegrinding so i can get a solid job and then coast the rest of my professional life#is only a good idea if the world stays functional and i live until. idk. 50 or 60 i think would make it worth it#im just so jealous of people who dont have to financially support their family. i didnt pick this. i dont want this#nobody around me gets it either. nobody i know is in this situation#every time somebody tells me to slow down or take a break i want to kill them. like im an only child and my parents are aging#they do not have retirement savings. there is a very real ticking clock for me to hit an income level to keep the 3 of us going#part of me wishes i were irresponsible and could just. do what i want until it blows up in my face#but im too serious im too cautious im too risk averse im too pragmatic#so here i am. spending my 20s ignoring any and all personal enjoyment in favour of Building My Future#i dont think life ends at 30 or anything. if i knew the world was going to be okay i wouldnt worry so much#but i cant shake the belief that we’re headed for a societal collapse in my lifetime. likely when i’m middle aged.#i dont want to be a doomer but what the fuck is the point of it all. why am i doing this if not to set myself up for the next 60 years#freewheeling bitextual
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I’m soooo excited to finish writing toxic!megumi btw 🤤
#🧚🏽♀️ — luxe chit chat#the doc is low key gathering dust but it’s okay#idk if I mentioned Kay is here until Monday so we are just hanging out and having fun!#we’re rewatching spy x family atm!#just been watching a bunch of stuff and playing games together it’s been rly nice#idk how many of u here followed me from my old blog#I mentioned having a rly tough time with a friend and tbh the situation hasn’t improved in the least#my mental health is super bad bc I feel really trapped with no options#but spending this time w Kay has been so nice#I’ve just had a shower n we r gonna watch more sxf!!#ANYWAY my point is I just haven’t had a chance to write lately since he’s visiting!#he uses my laptop to play Pokémon and stuff bc I have a better gaming one hehe <3#but I am gonna finish toxic megumi sometime next week#im hoping I might be able to squeeze some time in to write in when Kay sleeps in!#i wanted to do it today but he woke up not too long after me!#he usually sleeps in super late he doesn’t sleep too good :(#omg I’m rambling so much I’m sorry I hope ur all having good days and nights and taking care of yourselves!!
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...
#personal#so like ive been thinking about why i have this strange uncaring feeling about family during this vacation#i hate spending time with them i find them annoying and just not enjoyable to be around extended family is like having a customer talk to m#and bc of that i am the most insufferable person to be around. i dont have it in me to care about looking happy or being my best#i just exist i am here i am here with you and thats all it is to me. if i had a choice i would not be here.#they get mad with the way i am they dont like my indifference about everything we do but i am just LIKE that im honest about my feelings#it shows on my face and my voice. but i would never say anything bad outloud. so why does my body language matter anyways#i still think they should be happy im physically with them even if my heart is not so it should be enough...#i dont know when i stopped being happy around them#i think ive been this way for so long that i just have no room to really grow too much#and my friends and partners have a side of me that will never be shown to my family.#i feel two faced. but its not a bad thing#i wouldnt abandon them i respect what theyve done for me#but that doesnt erase the past.#... i understand it more. we have to live with our demons and the ghosts thay haunt us#but learning to not hold on to the hate and dread. not letting it kill you#thats. the hardest. part. because it comes back and it goes and its back and its gone#mmm#sometimes i do wish i could forget.#i would maybe be nicer.
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i worked onmy ermmm. little good habits reward sheet a lot .. im pretty excited :] i was gonna wait to start it until ive moved home bc a lot of the things r home specific (like spending time with loved ones etc) BUT i think im gonna go ahead n start it tmrw... i think itll be good to go ahead n get started on it b4 i move back that way its not such a big transition bc i think thats why my like. plans t get better when i moved up here. failed. so horrifically lol. bc i didnt give myseld any lead in i just made a huge change and then got upset when i didnt immediately adjust.
#i do eventually wanna move back to wa on my own bc i feel like. i didnt rly get to spend time here due to the everything. i just dont think#i was at all ready. and thats entirely on me i chose this i ignored literally everybody around me telling me it wasnt a good idea#i brought this all on myself. but i wanna try n improve#n im excitedd!! i think next year/whenever im Fr ready. im gonna try n move out to my old hometown#since my family moved away from it#which i think will be rly nice bc ill like. be independeny but in a familiar place and like. still close to home. ill still be able t have#the same insurance etc etc..#itll get rid of a Lot of stressors basically. and ill be able to visit family way easier !!#plus my hometown is way more walkable and since. idk if ill ever be able t drive just bc of like. my general nature#thats something im rly rly looking for...#i think my new goalsheet is rly well balanced as well. its likee#its based on thise little metallic walmart star stickers bc i miss those rly bad#thats the entire inspo. obv rn itll have to be digital bc i cant get my little star stickers#but. its like a points system#red is 5 points yellow is 3 points green is 2 points and blue is 1 point#(might move them around to make green 5 points bc green was my star color when i was little lol)#and each point is worth .50 cents. and so however many points i have at the end of the week thats how much money i get t have in my like#personal acct. and i get to use that however i want#and everything else will go to likee. savings and bills (i wont have bills for a while but yk)#and i even have likee. a streak system#i need to work on that sl its like balanced. bc idk if it is rn#my idea was t just have it be like. bc th way it is like#the tasks r split up by difficulty. more difficult tasks earn different colors#so my most difficult on there rn is to go for a walk#/ go to a public place / spend time outside#rly that goal is rly geared toward my hometown but im still gonna try n do it in my parents town... yk :] like i can ask my mom t take me#to th library and stuff. bc i wanna start going more#we went to th one here a couple times but it kinda got. shelved. yk. and i miss it#the one in ny hometown was rightt by our house and i never went#and im mad abt kt.
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