#im never actually going on the platform because its just not

[im-illegal]

sensory issues one million. im killing all swimsuit designers with a brick.

[dilf-phoenix-rights]

Tbh ppl here are so weird about tiktok users

[anxiously-going]

Not to be Sam Winchester on main, but do you every think about how growing up feeling like the black sheep of the family and or friend group warps you're sense of identity?

[gremlinhourz]

genuinely expecting to fail my first class in college!! and its like as much as i can get upset at myself for continuing the cycle of procrastination that ive been trying to break free from for years, i also feel like the reason im primarily upset is because i feel like im disappointing others and/or giving them a bad impression of me. like im not upset because i think i could have done more, im upset because i think other people will think i could have done more. when like honestly with school ive just developed an "it is what it is" attitude, like all i can do is try and try again, and if that means taking eng111, crashing and burning, but most importantly learning, then taking eng111 again, so fucking be it

[sorcerersandskillusers]

Card Meanings in the new, The Day I Picked Up Dazai art.

Ok so im currently still in shock that were getting new day I picked up dazai content so bare with me, but onece again Asagiri has included playing cards in his art so of course I have to break down what they mean.

Lets start with side A (the right side):

First we see a joker:

While Gogol is the obvious fit for the joker, the card also describes Dazai extremely well. He is almost always acting like the fool in any given situation, even in the mafia he loved to be as weird and funny as he could as well as tease and annoy the people around him, something jesters famously did.

In fact, his dynamic with Mori is very close to how a king and a jester used to work, where the jester was the only person who was allowed to openly mock the king and would usually heckle him. They also played a key part in psychological warfare, which we see Dazai specialises in.

I think the whole; wit, intelligence and unpredictability kind of speaks for itself.

Next card is the four of spades:

This one is also really fitting, it shows how after the day I picked up Dazai side A, Dazai settles into his little routine of going to bar lupin with Oda as well as how he finally has someone who he can trust and be comfortable around. Finally, it is a clear message of optimism, something Dazai never shows before he meets Oda.

Next the two of hearts:

This one is pretty obvious, it's Dazai and Oda spending time at bar lupin. It actually fits so well, there's not much I can say about it other then how it shows the love and care Dazai and Oda had for each other (platonically)

Now for Side B (prepare to cry)

The first card is the three of spades:

Whyyyyyyyyyy... why Asagiri. This one is also fairly obvious but it has multiple meanings. It most clearly represents Dazai suffering in side B as he has to run the mafia without odasaku and live in utter loneliness while destroying all the connections he never got to have for the sake of a friend he never got to meet.

“It was hard,” muttered the young man. “It was really hard fighting Mimic without you in the organization. I had no choice but to take over for Mori and make enemies of everyone around me to expand the business. Everything I did was for this world’s—”

It also represents the moment on the platform where he nearly tells Odasaku the truth and goes with him to bar lupin, the horrible decision to abandon everything for Odas future

The next card is... the ace of spades:

The ace of spade has many meanings, most of which involve change or transition, but by far its most famous meaning it death. I really don't think I have to explain this one, Beast Dazai having the card of death has a pretty clear meaning.

But the ace of spade does have a secondary meaning, and this one is a little more hopeful, as it shows Dazai passing the safety of this world onto Atsushi and Auktagawa.

Finally, (it's a bit hard to see) we have the ten of diamonds:

I want to focus mostly on the highlighted part because it's what really applies to BEAST Dazai, he lived his whole life to create a world where what matters most to him, that Oda gets to be happy and write his books, becomes real. This card doesn't apply to Dazai directly, more to the fact that he made succeeding in his mission his only priority and discarded everything else.

Bonus round Odasku card; the king of clubs

the only card thats seen on Oda's section and one that clearly represents Odasaku as a character.

"King of clubs represents a dark man, who is loyal and kind. He is a good businessman, shrewd with money and investments, but isn’t selfish. In fact, the King of clubs is a very devoted father, husband and citizen. In a broader sense, the King of clubs encompasses idealized qualities of a fatherly figure. This card is universally considered as a very good omen."

I feel like this sums Odasaku up very well, the devoted father and loyal friend parts are just him to a t.

(this is also the card I think best represents Fukuzawa)

Right, I think I got everything, if you disagree with this or find something I missed, please reblog or comment with whatever you want to add, or send me an ask. I love discussing, and hearing other people's views as long as they're respectful.

If you add something, please add it in the post not the tags, so I can reply to it (or in the tags if that makes you more comfortable)

[runaeveena]

Your dashboard if you were in a d&d fantasy world still involved in fictional erotica discourse part 2

⛰️ berenicesblade Follow

now that the new Mountain Angel volume has come out can we please tag spoilers, some of us are still waiting for our pigeon mail

🦚 faeynadaughter Follow

you can access the volume in full on TomePlane!

🎭 bardcampistrash Follow

until TomePlane acknowledges that its interplanar storage is made possible by binding aboleths to the plane and killing them then we are going to continue not using that platform, thanks

🦚 faeynadaughter Follow

aboleths killed my cousin who was a royal cleric. ill never understand why theres a whole movement to protect abyssal creatures when theyve caused so much damage to our kingdoms. and disliking a pocket dimension which provides thousands of people access to books? your attitude reeks of anti literaturism and mal-aligned virtue signaling and im not sure which is worse

🫒 tenthday237 Follow

Aliizya gets pregnant on page 62

⛰️ berenicesblade Follow

banished

620 Notes

🏰 finchtruther Follow

okay but the way that faelor finch writes every song that perfectly fits pennbiel liiike its giving closet fangirl

🧭 waywardwarlock

seriouslyy!! like what else is "give me your unmarked hand / in the shadowfell we won't be a secret" supposed to be about if not pennipher and corabiel

16 Notes

🌫️ cloudgiant-snailboy Follow

yall please dont fill up the unseen servant tag with your super fucking weird smut posts im just looking for tips on how to find my unseen servant

🪡 scç-writer

the search function on tomeblr does need to be updated but we dont have to kinkshame :)

🌫️ cloudgiant-snailboy Follow

the site is being overrun by virgin degenerates

🍯 treebarkhookhandwagondoor

sounds like you need Wilam the Wizard with Wandering Hands to help you summon the unseen stick in your ass

290 Notes

🗝️ crypt-princess Follow

so whose going to be the first to commission a painting of that scene with Aliizya and the beholder 👀

🍎 bloodmaledickening Follow

i already asked my local artisan he said he's gotten two other commissions for the same scene lmao

🐁 softbarbarian

girl i commissioned a tapestry

45 Notes

🕯️ andersfirelight Follow

friendly reminder that devil deals are a real thing that a lot of people fall victim too and that demons are malicious and do destroy peoples lives if theyre not careful so please be careful when consuming works like Hellionfinity which romanticizes devil deals and fiendish soul contracts

🌾entangled-farmer Follow

imo any work of fiction that involves a romance between any type of fiend is not just problematic but harmful

🕯️ andersfirelight Follow

i used to be indifferent to books that had devil romance interests because like thats their whole thing theyre seducing people to get their souls and the mc overcomes it, but reading through the replies i see that Hellionfinity actually ends with the devil character as the main romantic lead which is super problematic in terms of power imbalance and the fact that he has a redemption arc is so out of touch especially since our military is finally recovering from the azgurian assault

🧚🏻‍♂️arms-of-faelor

helliofinity also has a scene where the main character uses a soul coin that an imprisoned mortal gave him and he uses it to bring the devil out of avernus so he doesnt fully die and no one in the book mentions it or talks about how messed up it is to use soul coins and we never see the now bound to hell prisoner ever again

🕯️ andersfirelight Follow

hellionfinity officially cancelled on my end!

88 Notes

☘️ celest-ial Follow

moment of silence for all the customers waiting on drink orders while the tavern wench gets her back blown out by a new guy every night ✊😔

🦁 king-killa Follow

the gods work hard but Girthy Gladys gets worked harder

57,022 Notes

🎲 beholdersbeholdingme

paladin and warlock romances are OUT! cleric and necromancer romances are IN!

🪭 royalcoinpurse Follow

the only thing a cleric should do to a necromancer is beat him to death so she can revive him and kill him again

🎲 beholdersbeholdingme

❇️ arch-dryad Follow

i think we need to analyze why we're so quick to place women in categories of devious seductress or healer in romance novels as if that hasnt been the pervasive trope that holds magic-touched women back in our actual society

🍯 treebarkhookhandwagondoor

why do you assume these fictional tropes are mf couples only? can a gay cleric not beat his gay necromancer boyfriend to death?

🎲 beholdersbeholdingme

and off! beat him off cmon guys

5,275 Notes

🧀 weremouse Follow

yall ever be talking or whatnot and feel like no one understands you

🪨 sebrenenogdon Follow

ᛄᚠ ᛡᚢ ᚳᚪᚾ ᚱᛁᛞ ᚦᛄᛋ ᛡᚢ ᚺᚪᚠ ᛏᚢ ᚱᛁᛒᛚᚪᚷ ᚦᛄᛋ

🧀 weremouse Follow

say that shit fr (<- looking around clueless)

🪨 sebrenenogdon Follow

ᛋᛁᚱᛁᚪᛋᛚᛁ

60 Notes

🌠 crownofstars

remember when that person made a call out post for the author of ilairepeler for using a ghost writer and it turned out the author was an actual ghost. writing. like a literal ghost writer. like.

🍄gnomestool Follow

arent you the dwarf that fucked a slaad

🌠 crownofstars

how would you like to become a ghost so you can write more witty comments like this for eternity

301 Notes

[drchucktingle]

favorite author i have never read

hey there buckaroos thank you for all the DEEP DISCUSSIONS we are having a great time here on tumblr. thought today i could make a post that is slightly more difficult its not all sunshine days ahead and requires a little introspection. LOOK AT US we have all arrived here together through trust and love and i think we can keep this going. chuck made this post on other platforms years ago and i think it was said very well then and led to some good discussion, so i am going to repost here. okay lets go deep bud here we go:

i would like to spend moment today talking about common joke i hear online (and even too my face at conventions). this is jokerman way i hear ALL the dang time: 'chuck tingle is my favorite author i have never read' or less jokerman way but of ‘i have never read his books but i love chuck tingle'.

first of all, THANK YOU buds. this is not way of call out post to make you feel bad, i appreciate your way and understand you are trying to support. this is not attack on your message and from bottom of chucks heart THANK YOU.

BUT i have to say something about this. please consider what you are saying when you post this. would you send this as message to STEPHEN KING or NEIL GAIMAN or NK JEMISIN? i doubt this. it would seem VERY RUDE to message other authors. just imagine trotting up to a writer and saying ‘i would NEVER read your books haha’ but it is sent to chuck all the dang time.

obvious reason buds say it to chuck is that i am queer author with a unique way. yes i write in realm of wild fantasy and erotic pairings, but by saying ‘i have never read chuck BUT' you are really saying 'i am posting my support of this but PLEASE DONT THINK I AM REALLY INTERESTED IN THIS PERSONALLY.' there are similar distasteful jokes that i will not repeat involving saying 'no bud on bud pounds' after a sentence that works in similar way.

is sexual art really that bad? is queer art really that embarrassing? is unusual outsider art really that funny?

it is one thing if your preferred pound is not one of chucks tinglers, that is TOTALLY FINE BUD, but if you are an adult i would say 'is it REALLY that scary to read a book about a way of sex that is not yours? is it that difficult to think that something that seems silly to you could actually MOVE YOU in an important way? do you HAVE to disconnect yourself from lgtbqia art with a 'but i don't read this myself?'

keep in mind, there are gay tinglers, there are asexual tinglers, there are trans tinglers, there are select your own timeline tinglers, there are horror tinglers. TINGLERS FOR EVERY TASTE. the thing that buds are often REALLY saying with ‘favorite author i have never read’ is ‘this is WEIRD and dont be confused because im NOT WEIRD IM COOL DONT THINK I ACTUALLY LIKE THIS’. funny enough even the proudly fun and wild and unique buckaroos will STILL say this line, maybe without taking time to think of what it means or how rude it is?

WHY would you never read a chuck book? because my way is queer? because it is neurodivergent? even if that is not there reason or even if YOUR ARE ALSO PERSONALLY QUEER AND NEURODIVERGENT TOO, think about what the joke is IMPLYING.

is sincerely enjoying something thats kind of unusual that difficult? do we really have to slather it in irony and ‘so bad its good?’ before reposting?

in closing as man name of chuck i will say you can still make this joke if you want buckaroos i know you are just having a good time proving love in your own way. i am not upset with you bud and i appreciate your support in any way you give it. there are some buckaroos who just CANT AFFORD tinglers and that is an important way i understand as well. obviously this conversation does not apply to those buds. but for the rest of us trotting along, MAYBE think about what you are really saying with this jokerman way first, and MAYBE try cracking open a tingler because you might be surprised. its not that scary bud. thank you for listening

being sincere is VERY COOL and VERY PUNK ROCK. i encourage all buckaroos out there to give it a try.

LOVE IS REAL

[disneyprincemuke]

our spot * ls2

a text from you is the last thing logan expects when he's back home for the holidays especially when it's your first text in almost two years

pairings: logan sargeant x fem!reader

warnings: mentions of infidelity

notes: YOOO how is it that i've been screaming about oscar and sebastian for weeks yet i write about logan first anyway? hope u enjoy this bc i OFC enjoyed breaking my own heart while writing this &lt;;/3

super long read btw, it's like 3.7k words

(f1 masterlist)

(part two)

logan isn't back home very often. he doesn't exactly have the chance to, given his circumstances. so when he is, it's typically a nice breath of fresh air. because that's where you are.

or at least, used to be.

he doesn’t hear from you often anymore. since he’d gotten busier with his promotion to f1, it’s been a lot harder to keep in touch with you.

admittedly, he does miss you. but what right does he have to tell you that outwardly?

the only way he knows what’s going on with you are whatever you let the public know of yourself. your instagram posts and stories don’t come often, so logan might as well consider you a stranger.

he only knows one thing, that his mother let slip over the phone during their call, that you’ve started seeing somebody recently. he doesn’t know if you’re still together — the man his mother speaks of doesn’t exist on any of your platforms.

perhaps it’s because it’s only hearsay? but you’ve always been sort of a private person yourself, so he’s not exactly surprised.

logan sighs to himself, rolling his chair over to the window that faces what used to be your bedroom. the window is shut with its curtains drawn.

you moved out the moment you turned 18. he once had your address when you gave it to him, and he kicks himself over the fact that he never got around to visiting you and seeing how you’ve come into your own.

he never got to see the apartment you would talk about growing up and all the decorations you planned on putting up.

he wonders, did you ever keep the framed picture with him when you went to disneyworld as kids? did you bring it with you?

logan huffs and pulls down his blinds. he turns to face his room, leaning back into his seat. it’s the holidays, but there’s nowhere to go and nothing to do with absolutely nobody.

his friends have all gone back to visit and spend time with family. he spent his first couple of days with his family, but even they’ve got better things to eventually.

all he can do is train for his next season.

he decides to finally get up to his feet, grabbing the gym bag that sits on the edge of his bed. he’s just about to drive to the gym when his phone lights up his dim bedroom.

a notification from you that makes his heart race and hands shake. a text from you is the last thing he expected out of his visit.

he hasn’t talked to you in nearly 2 years.

heard ur back home

he raises an eyebrow, tilting his head. he doesn’t write a reply immediately, so much hesitation and confusion mixing in his mind.

it’s taken him so off guard that he comes to a realisation that he doesn’t know how to talk to you anymore.

just for the holidays, im headed back to the uk after new year’s

your response is quick.

our spot

logan’s got no idea what you mean by that. until another text from you comes in.

10 minutes. see u

oh. you’re actually asking to see him.

suddenly he’s got no idea what to do. does he actually go?

he’s pacing around his room, frantically searching for the things he’d need to go and see you. which, wouldn’t actually be much. just his phone, his wallet, and

his gaze lands on the sad pile in the corner of his room, trinkets he’s collected from traveling the world in his first season. collected just for you, like you’d always talked about growing up.

now begs the question: does he bring it with him or does he just forget it ever existed?

doesn’t matter. he grabs his phone and wallet, heading out the door. his history with you is never spoken about.

maybe once, on a drunken night in australia with oscar. when he asked logan why he’s still visibly single, logan explained his situation.

how you kissed him the day he was leaving to stay in europe to fully commit to his junior career. how you’d called him every single night when you were teenagers, waiting around months at a time for him to come by for a short visit.

how you told him you loved him one evening when you were 19, in london when you were over for a visit. and how he had to put it on hold for his junior career, and never had the chance to get around to it because of his commitments to formula 1 now.

he had put it on hold, thinking you’d be around forever for him to come back to. he knows now that he’s never been more wrong in his life.

oscar never brought it up again after seeing the american choke on his words and laugh nervously as he retold the story.

when he found out you were seeing somebody, his heart broke. but he couldn't get himself to ask you about it. he knows it's his fault that you're in somebody else's arms now.

he quietly pads through his home, trying to pass his family members who have all resided in their individual bedrooms. even they've got no idea what's gone down between you two.

as far as they're concerned, you just simply drifted apart with time.

he parks his pickup truck right between the methodist building and what used to be the school you attended together growing up. he sits behind the wheel, eyes scanning the dark for any signs of you being here.

it's not a very far drive, only 5 minutes from his house and yours. just a playground that you used to hang at when you were growing up. when the world got too loud, this is where you'd come to regain composure.

he'd caught you one evening sitting here all alone when you were 8, and it's become your spot for late-night talks ever since. right on that green slide is where logan told you that he wanted to be an f1 driver when he was older.

it was on that blue swing that you admitted the crush you've had on him your entire life, and he reciprocated.

his heart races in his chest, unsure if you'd meant what you texted him. what if you bailed and this was all some sick twisted joke you're pulling on him?

and a random car pulls up in front of the methodist. he anticipates the moment you'd crawl out of the driver's seat, looking different from the last time he saw you - which was about 2 years ago when he last talked to you.

but after about a second, the backseat door opens, your leg poking out with your hair dishevelled in a ponytail. you close the door as you step onto the sidewalk, tugging down your dress that's hiked up your thighs as the car drives off.

logan finally turns off his engine, stepping out shortly after you. your eye roams the quiet street, locking into his as he watches you take a deep breath.

he nods, pointing towards the playground. you nod. he locks his truck and slowly makes his way to the brightly lit playground between the two establishments.

you make a beeline for the swing, dropping yourself down and bending forward to unstrap the heels that suffocate your feet. logan's not even going to ask where you'd come from all dolled up.

he occupies the empty swing next to you, clasping his hands together and placing them between his knees. it's a lot colder than he initially anticipated and his sweatpants are barely keeping him comfortable.

you sit in silence for the next couple of minutes. there's chatter from the methodist building next to you. you pick at your nails, trying to soften your breathing.

it's only then logan notices that your cheeks are flushed and the smell of alcohol in the air. which is obviously not coming from either place that surrounds both of you.

"are you drunk?" logan starts in a whisper, craning his neck down trying to get a look at you.

you look at him from the side of your eyes, lips pouted out in a frown. "tipsy," you correct him, "not drunk."

he nods to himself, rocking back and forth on the swing. he leans his head on the chain that holds his body up. he doesn't really know what to say.

in fact, he doesn't think there's much to say. you were the one who started ghosting him all those years ago. he's not upset or bitter about it, but he completely understands why you'd done it.

if he were in your position, he can almost guarantee that he would have taken the same measures.

"how long have you been back?" you ask, eyes tracing the design on the rubber playground floor. "why didn't you tell me?"

logan raises his eyebrows. "uh," he stutters, "i didn't know i had to. i'm sorry."

you shrug. "you didn't have to," you trail off, dropping your head low to avoid his gaze. "i just thought you would've told me when you'd come for a visit. we haven't seen each other in a while."

yeah, 2 years, he wanted to say.

"it's cause we haven't seen each other in a while that i didn't think to tell you i'm back home," logan admits solemnly, pressing his lips together. "i'm sorry, though. if i knew, you would've been the first person i told."

"i'm sorry i stopped picking up your calls," you suddenly say softly. "and answering your text messages. and telling my parents to tell you i'm away on vacation every time you came to visit."

he just nods. it hurt when you first started distancing yourself from him. but, what can he do?

he sort of caught on in the second week after you let him facetime call ring twice without an answer. that would’ve marked the fifth call you ignored, and the twentieth text you left him on delivered.

so he dropped it. he thought that maybe you would come around when he comes back to miami. apparently not, because you were ‘away’ on a trip with friends. which, now he knows, could possibly be just a lie.

logan smiles, mostly to himself as you’re looking straight ahead at the playground’s structure. “i get it. it’s alright.”

“no, really,” you adjust yourself to look at him with a sigh. “i feel horrible every single day about what i did. but i just didn’t know how to cope with the fact that you put me in the backseat when i was right there.”

“hey.” logan slumps his shoulders. suddenly he feels a tinge of guilt in his chest, and no amount of quick convincing makes it go away. “i understand why you did what you did. you deserve to be with someone who puts you first. i didn’t do that.”

you shake your head. a small smile creeps up on your face, looking up as your eyes start to glisten under the lights. “you don’t get it.”

“what do you mean?”

“i miss you,” you say in a sigh. “i thought you said you loved me too?”

“i did,” logan nods. then he corrects himself: “i do.”

“i still think of you,” you admit with a small smile. you laugh dryly to yourself before looking ahead at the playground. “sometimes i wonder how different our lives would be if i’d just never… stopped waiting.”

logan rests his head on the chain that holds the swing up. “sometimes i wonder how nice it’d be if i’d just,” he sighs, “chosen you.”

“same.”

he can see himself on the playground with you all those years ago. sitting in the structure, giggling with one another as you talk about your separate lives.

your lives seem to come together when you’re on that playground, though you walk separate paths that would prove to be more detrimental to your friendship.

you’d indulge one another in gossip the other had no idea about, but tried their hardest to relate and mirror frustrations. more often than not, a notebook is laid down on the ground between you while you try to draw out the situation of said gossips.

it always makes logan cringe thinking of how invested he’d gotten in your drama with your friends.

“i’m seeing somebody,” you whisper.

“i heard from mum.”

“yeah.”

logan takes a few breaths. “is he good to you?”

you nod. he just smiles then plants his feet into the ground. “that’s good. i’m so happy for you.”

“he’s not you, though, logan.”

he turns his head, looking at you in shock. “what?”

“i want you to tell me i’ve made a mistake,” you say flatly, turning your head to look at him with a frown. “tell me i shouldn’t be with him.”

“i can’t say that to you,” logan frowns, eyebrows furrowing at your sudden request. “i can’t decide that for you.”

you take a deep breath, shakily letting it out. “tell me you still want me, logan. and i’m all yours.” you sigh. “but i need you to say it to my face. cause i won’t wait for you if you don’t ask me to stay.”

logan searches your eyes for any sort of hesitation, or signs of backing off. but he doesn’t. you’ve got that same glimmer in your eye that he’s seen over and over again.

“i do,” he sighs, shaking his head. “i really do. but i can’t promise you anything. i’ll only break your heart. you know this. we lead two very different lives.”

you shrug, dropping your head again. “we could make it work. you’ll never really know.”

“please don’t do this. you’re with somebody else who gives you the world, i’m sure,” he tried to explain to you. “better than i can. you know at least that for a fact.”

you finally stand up, fists clenched by your side. “i can see it in your eyes, logan. you don’t want things to be this way — i’m giving you a chance to change the course of things.”

he looks up at you, lips parted and mind running with thoughts that all contradicted one another.

not talking to you took a while to get used to. especially when he moved up to formula 1, it was hard to find someone to talk to who would listen to him talk without judgement.

he needed your presence the most when he felt so out of place in his environment; like he was an imposter who didn’t deserve to be where he did.

your sudden departure from his life took a harder hit than he cares to admit. he thought about you every single day: the one person who can tell which smiles he fakes on the daily.

the ultimatum you’re giving him is too tough to make a decision on the spot. in hindsight, he’s not only breaking your heart, but also his.

logan sighs, standing up to tower over you. he hovers a hand over your shoulder. “let me drive you home.”

“no, come on, logan!” you shove his hand away from you and stumble a step back. “do something for once! risk something!”

“it’s not that easy.”

“but it is,” you say, matter-of-factly, giving him a stare of indifference. you hold your arms up by your side and raise your eyebrows. “i know my pain is such an imposition. but i’m tired of feeling like this when i know how you feel for me!

“when i know how to make this pain go away. work with me here, logan.”

“i can’t do that because there are more important things on the line for me right now!” logan spits at you, throwing his hands into the air. “i do, okay! i do love you! i think about you every single day, but i can’t throw away everything i’ve ever worked for just to be with you!”

“who says you’ve got to do that?” you shout back, shoving him slightly. “i’m asking you to choose me alongside everything you’ve got, not drop your entire career for me!”

“i’m a fucking laughing stock, do you not see what’s circulating the internet?” he asks exasperatedly with an eyeroll. “you don’t want that going for you. i’ve got bigger things to work on.”

he turns on his heel and walks towards his truck. when he doesn’t hear your footsteps following him, he stops halfway and turns to you. “get in the car, i’m driving you back.”

“so this is how it’s going to be?” you laugh dryly, gesturing at your surroundings with a finger point. “you’re just going to push me aside because you think you can’t give me what i need?”

“i don’t think it — i know so.”

“and what exactly is it that you think i need?”

“somebody to show up for you when it matters,” logan huffs, slowly making his way back over to you. “somebody who can love you even on his worst days; who can take you out on dates, love you on your bad days, and just be there for you.

“i can’t even do that for myself. what the hell makes you think i can do all of that for you?”

he stops right in front of you, chest heaving from frustration and eyebrows furrowed as he towers over you. “i won’t be the person who can give you what you need. not now, i’m still working to be better.”

“you don’t know that.”

“i’m done with this conversation, (y/n),” he sighs, taking a step back. the smell of your perfume increases his urge to just pull you into his arms, but he can’t do that to you, himself, or the guy you’re with. “get in the car, i’m driving you home.”

"fine, whatever," you snap, folding your arms over your chest and stomping towards him to reach the white pickup truck by the corner.

when he planned on coming home for the winter break, you reaching out was never one of his things to expect. he thought that you were absolutely done with him, given that you hadn't talked to him in nearly two years.

his brothers giving him flack for his formula 1 season, maybe, but you confessing your feelings for him all over again? he hadn't ever thought about it in a million years.

when he climbs into the driver's seat, you've already fastened your seatbelt. your legs are crossed, like your arms over your chest, and your body is tilted towards the window.

logan sighs. "(y/n). please understand it from my side. i don't want to hurt you any more than i already have. you don't deserve this."

you still don't meet his eyes. your eyes are trained on the dark scenery outside with a prominent frown on your face. "just take me back to my parents' house."

"what about your apartment?"

"i put it out on the market a month ago," you admit softly as logan turns on the engine. "i'm moving out of miami."

now, logan is typically a well-tempered person. growing up with brothers, it's definitely one way to train that aspect of yourself.

but the last time he had asked you to reconsider moving to the united kingdom with him after graduation, you had refused. because your life is here in miami: your family, your friends, and everything you've ever known.

all of a sudden, you're moving out of here?

he hadn't faulted you initially, but he might just start seeing a change of heart if it comes down to this.

logan shifts in his seat uncomfortably, lifting his foot from the gas pedal. suddenly he's curious to know more about what's going on in your life: moving out of the house is one thing for you, but moving to a completely different place is something else.

"where are you going?"

"new york for a couple months," you say, staring at the street ahead. "just for some training. after that, i'm off to germany. i got a job offer."

"what about your boyfriend?"

"i haven't told him about it yet," you shrug, "i've been thinking of you too much to consider what is to come of the relationship eventually."

"you shouldn't do that. i'm not your boyfriend."

a dry scoff passes your lips. "thanks, i actually know that."

he pulls up to the front yard of his home. pulling up the handbrake, he turns to you with a hand on the backrest of your seat. "i'm serious. don't sabotage whatever you've got going on for you. embrace it."

"really?" you scrunch your nose as you turn to face him. "life advice from someone who keeps sabotaging all of the lifelines i keep throwing out for him to save what we had going on for years?"

logan sighs. he raises his hands to surrender. "fine. do what you want. i only want the best for you and i know it's not me."

"whatever, logan," you scoff, taking off your seatbelt. you throw it back into place and unlock the car door, pushing it open. "i won't be around forever: remember that."

you crawl out and slam the door behind you. all logan can do is sink in his seat and watch you cross the road, walk up to your front door and shut that behind you as well. you don't spare him another look, which is when it all washes over him like tsunami waves.

but as much as he wants you, he will have to stand true to his words. because he knows his truth: he isn't the person you deserve to be with.

[killerlookz]

Joost Klein x Goth!Gf Headcannons

content: SFW and NSFW headcannons below the cut, 18+ MDNI, this work contains rpf and has been tagged as such, do not continue if that makes you uncomfortable

SFW Headcannons

You're pretty much his personal makeup artist now, anytime he wants to do his fun little facepaint looks (like the mime or kiss makeup) you're the first one he's asking to help him out

He absolutely doesn't mind you kissing him with your lipstick on and is in no rush to wash off the dark-colored lipstick prints you leave on his cheeks after you do so, sometimes letting them sit there for hours while he goes about his day.

You can't tell me that this man doesn't absolutely love going to the goth clubs. It's definitely a different speed than he's usually used to, and some of the music may be a little slow for his taste but that man just absolutely loves dancing and the nightlife in general.

He definitely dresses up to "fit in" to go to the goth clubs too! Putting on whatever black items he can find in his closet, usually a pair of rugged black jeans adorned with a thick belt either studded or with a big buckle and some black shirt he spent far too much money on. He usually ends up looking more like he's about to join Opium or Drain Gang than he does goth, but your heart entirely melts at the fact that he's trying.

You absolutely inspire him to buy a pair of New Rocks (side note im actually surprised ive never seen him in new rocks they're very his style lol) and he just absolutely towers over you in them, which he finds very amusing (cue him teasing you about being "short" even though the platforms of those shoes are like 10 cm, making him like 198 cm/ 6'5)

If you are wearing big shoes and they start to hurt he will absolutely carry you back to wherever you need to go- The same goes for if you're breaking in new shoes- you're out and about together and all of a sudden you start treading behind him, walking awkwardly due to the blisters forming on your heels and the backs of your ankles- and he knows, you don't even have to say anything, he just stops dead in his tracks, and bends down for you to get on his back.

Thrifting/ DIYing dates!!! It becomes a tradition for the two of you to go out to thrift/consignment stores and pick out pieces for the two of you to style or DIY into something. He loves it especially when you DIY things for him, and always shows off the clothes/accessories you put together for him, "Oh you like my necklace? Yeah, my girlfriend made it for me."

He laces up your corsets for you! No longer do you need to struggle trying to reach behind your back to tie your corsets. He's always so delicate about it too, "You're sure I'm not squeezing you too tight?" Running his hands all along your sides and your hips after he finishes tying it shut.

He definitely just thinks you are so cool, despite having his own unique style himself, he is just in so much awe of you being yourself, and just genuinely finds you to be the coolest person on Earth, whether its the way you do your makeup, or dress, or the music you listen to, he's just obsessed.

He'll absolutely tease you a little bit though, cue him singing "Because toniiiight will be the noiiight that I will fall for yewwww over agaiiiin" at you because he knows it pisses you off *just a little* you'll chastise him for that being emo not goth, but he still finds it funny regardless, and he loves seeing that little smile you give him when you're trying to pretend to be mad at him, but really you're holding back a laugh

He loves when you wear his necklaces or his fancy belts to accessorize with

Getting tattoos together is a muuuust, he's not so into the idea of matching tattoos, but just spontaneously on a whim being like, "hey do you wanna get another tattoo today?"

NSFW Headcannons

You CANNOT count how many new fishnet tights you've had to buy from Joost being far too impatient to get you undressed, bending you over, lifting up your skirt and just ripping the flimsy fabric open, not even bothering to take them off of you.

However, when the sex is more romantic he absolutely loves taking his time with you, so delicately removing each of your layers (and us goth girlies know... we wear a looot of layers lmaoo) he just loves being all sensual about it, he also just for sure enjoys teasing you with how excruciatingly slow he is about it.

Loves seeing how much he can ruin your makeup, whether its smudged lipstick or eyeliner dripping down your face, the messier the better.

In addition to fucking up your makeup he loves when you go down on him while you're wearing lipstick, the way your lipstick smears as you take him in your mouth, god he finds it so hot.

Obsessed with when you wear leather or latex!! Oof the way the tight, shiny material hugs your body, he cannot get enough, and honestly is ready to take it off of you the second you slip it on.

He absolutely adores you in lace too (especially black lacey lingerie) when you wear lacey tops with nothing but a bra underneath... (same can be said for a fishnet top) oooooh girl he is absolutely feral, the way you're technically "covered" but still exposed in all the right spots... whew

If you have long/pointy nails he looves feeling you dig them into him as he fucks you,

Whenever the two of you go out to the goth clubs things definitely get very steamy, always ending up with his arms wrapped around your waist and your ass pressed against his crotch as your bodies move together to the dark, slow, synthy music.

He loves it when you bite him! Always calling you his little vampire as you suck on his neck, leaving pretty little lovebites and lipstick smudges on his skin. (vampire/blood kink goes brrrr wait what who said that hAHAHHAHHA)

Fucking to goth music is a MUST... not sorry about it, bands like Depeche Mode and She Wants Revenge are top tier sex music, him mumbling along to Tear You Apart, his lips pressing into your neck, sending vibrations down your spine as he slowly undresses you.

Also fucking while watching horror movies hehehehe, there's just something about the suspense and tension that gets your blood going, one second you're watching the TV anxiously, and the next second he's on top of you as you're begging for him to please fuck you.

[punkitt-is-here]

im a huge sucker for Real Time Combat but I will never get behind thinking its the natural evolution of Turn Based Combat. What!! these are different styles!!! i genuinely think the turn based influence is explicitly what MAKES FF7s real time combat INCREDIBLE for me. without it, it would be just a kind-of mid action game.

FF16 just has me thinking about that and it kind of reminds me of how we had a 2D platformer drought for a while because of 3D being seen as inherently better but we've ALREADY gone through the whole loop of realizing these are two different styles with pros and cons to those. The thought that goes into designing both styles vary greatly and they both accomplish different things.

like, being able to just mash X and kill a guy in real time is not inherently better than carefully strategizing and experimenting to kill a guy in a couple turns!! these are two unique stances in gameplay with strengths and weaknesses and its weird to see one treated as better. and i admit, im a fucking sucker for real time, i like at least some real time elements in most game's combat, but i think FF7R's combat is incredible BECAUSE it's not just purely real-time. You can swap around, go through menus, plan stuff!! its such a cool synthesis!! Real Time Combat can offer the thrill of really BEING in combat, dodging and weaving, getting gritty with your foe, but Turn Based allows you to strategize and plan and have MUCH easier access to a potentially HUGE arsenal of moves without having to fiddle with menus while you're scrambling to avoid getting hit. These styles are different and can bring a lot to the other, but acting like one is somehow better beyond just preference is very silly to me.

When you play a game with turn-based combat that sucks, know that it's probably because the balancing/design itself is not fun, not the actual genre. Super Lesbian Animal RPG has no real-time elements at all in combat, but it's some of the most engaging and fun and well-balanced turn-based combat I've had the pleasure of experiencing. And it has a deep focus on teamwork and friendship, and I think that's genuinely very hard to instill in Real-Time games because the player is forced to control only one character at a time in linear, progressively flowing time. I love KHII, but it rarely feels like you're working together because aside from your Limit attacks, you can't really collaborate with your party members or strategize. It's still a FANTASTIC game that I love playing, but the element of teamwork is lacking in comparison to a turn-based game, like, say, Bug Fables, which has you control all three members of Team Snakemouth. It allows you to have a myriad of attacks and moves that all influence each other, and because you can control all members, it feels really good and rewarding! And you all feel like friends, not just in cutscenes, but explicitly in gameplay because teamwork is highly incentivized to make things work!

i guess if ur a dev or just someone who appreciates games remember that there's no objectively better style for gameplay; it's all about context!! what is the GOAL of combat? What choices does it have the player make? Would one style work over the other for achieving this goals? That's how you pick what style you want to use! That's how you can analyze why or why not a game's style is working for you! rghaGHHHH GAME DEVELOPMENT IS COOL ARRHGHGHGHHGFJG

[niftykin]

Your eyes trapped me in the first "Hi"

Starring: Mikey/Manjiro Sano

Sypnosis: Small headcanons of him

A/N: I read the little prince again and i cited some quotes because it is so beautiful and im gonna cry

request are open

dni || request rules || writing prompts

MIKEY - “And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.”

Mikey is a very hype teenager on the aspects that matter. If we are going to talk about him and his actions we must go into his whole personality aswell.

Manjiro is childish but that doesnt mean at all that he cant understand the whole meaning of the word 'love'

It is very hard for a little teenager that doesn't know almost anything about something so called about, it is so important to everyone and he knows the concept on words but not in action

Do you think that he could tell you the meaning of "Love" being something else than a feeling? but how does it feel actually?

Emma said that its like butterflies in the stomach, but Draken said that is a comforting feeling, that is something different than what Mikey would feel being with anyone

He really doesnt know, and doesnt want to know, he just wants to lay with you, he feels protected and by being the protector aswell

He feels comfortable with you, he feels the butterflies with you, he can be childish or mature, he can be everything that you need, can you see that? he hopes to be your knight in shinning armor.

“The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or touched, they are felt with the heart.”

He loves you, cares about you and trusts you. He cannot offer you much luxury you could await for someone to give you, he hopes that he is enough

By that i do not mean he would pamper you often, he will into his possibilities, taking care of you, buying you your favorite snack, going to dates with you and offering you the respect you deserve from him and everybody else

he is a good and caring boyfriend, but he is not perfect, he is a human after all, one that makes mistakes and has some things he could improve and some others that he simply cant

He is very stubborn and gets into fights often, is something you being his partner do not aprove due to the damage it would cause to him even being the leader of ToMan

They said love also brings pain but he thought it was physical damage, he could have stand it if it was

He doesnt mean to hurt you on any way, MINUS physically, he will NEVER raise a hand at you

But he might just walk away to clean his mind. he doesnt want to hurt you but he ends up doing so at the time of the fights

“It is such a mysterious place, the land of tears.”

You have cried for him, and he will never forget himself for that. He wants to be your man, he wants to be your knight and your everything, but how could he do so if he never had someone to teach him before?

He will change, and he has said that multiple times, he is really trying to improve his communication skills, but its not a change that can be done in a couple of days

could you give him time to cool down on a fight? he wants to talk, not to argue

Its not bad that you want to talk, what is, is if it becomes an argument, and he would never want to argue with you

He doesnt yell but his calm demeanor makes you lose your temper that times

He wants to understand but he cant if the situation is too heated

He doesnt want those tears rolling down your eyes, he just wants to be your boyfriend

© Niftykin - All rights reserved, do not copy/translate any of my works on ANY platform, im only on TUMBLR

[thurio-edau]

hey everyone! this is my birthday and i'm so happy to celebrate it. yep, june 12th. it was an average day but im still happy that my friends celebrated!

ok blake (half) face reveal

THIS PICTURE IS MONTHS OLD ISTG AND I LOOK 12 Y.O BUT I SWEAR IM 16 😭 BUT ITS THE ONLY ACTUAL PIC I HAVE OF MYSELF CUZ I NEVER TAKE PICS OF MYSELF OK AND I LOOK LIKE A FUCKBOY (idek if i look like a boy) BC I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO TAKE PICS SO MY FRIENDS SAID 'TAKE IT FROM THE MIRROR' AND I WORE A MASK CUZ IM SO FUCKING INSECURE

IM CLOSING THE REBLOGS FOR THIS CAUSE I MIGHT DELETE THE PIC IN THE FUTURE--

anyway.

the reason why this day is so important goes beyond just this. trigger warning for the things ahead, it's okay if you don't read it, i'm just really glad i could celebrate my birthday with such positivity! it's just that there are huge reasons why i'm really glad to be celebrating my birthday.

alright, serious story here.

the reason why it's so special is because i planned it three months ago. i planned my birthday. to end it all today. to end it before even reaching adulthood, i decided i couldn't go on and i was going to take my last breath. i couldn't take it. it was so heavy, it was a burden to live. and i decided my birthday would be such a fun day to end it all. before i graduate, before i become an age with irreversible responsibilities, before i have a chance to grow up. before i can have a life.

but i met life changing people. both on here and other platforms. it's like i have multiple found families :)

and with my friends on another place, we planned my future. yes, i will have a future. if i believe everyone deserves a chance to live, a chance to turn all this around, then that should apply to me too and i should also deserve a second chance. to LIVE. not SURVIVE. i have survived all my life and im so fucking tired of it. i only need to survive for two more years, then i can actually live. i haven't lived in my life. had a fucked up childhood, in a fucked up environment, in a fucked up country under fucked up conditions. and i have to change this if i want to live.

in two years i will immigrate. i will have a safe place, in a safe country, around safe people, and a safe university. i will have a safe family, a found family. i will have a safe future. i will see therapy for ptsd, bpd, sh and i will try to recover from ed. i will transition. i will be alive. i will come back to life as the actual person i am.

i just have to keep on for two more years. then i will take the international english exam to be able to immigrate and hopefully fly to my found family. my biological family will reject me, i know. but my found family won't. thank you so much for being here in my journey. i want to make it through and survive for two more years just so i can live. i have survived for sixteen years. i can survive for two more.

i have that strength.

i am strong.

i deserve to live.

i am worth going on.

i don't deserve to end it all.

no one deserves that. and i can survive.

i have that strength.

so thank you everyone <3 for helping me realize a lot of things. just by existing, just by leaving a single comment, just by sending a single message, you guys helped me save my life. you guys saved my life. and thanks to you, i am alive today. my three months of planning went to 'waste', but now i will have two years to plan a future. a life. a life worth living.

thank you <3

-ya boy, Blake.

[thisismeracing]

King of my heart | ms47 | part 02

Pairing: hamilton!reader (she/her) x mick schumacher

Warnings: curse words, twitter environment, mention of food, not proofread etc etc. Minors DNI!

summary: Y/n and Mick interactions are now being noticed by everyone and some people are ready to share all the details with the internet.

a/n: none of the pictures used are mine, they are all from Pinterest and other apps. everything else is made up by me and I do not give permission for it to be published on a different platform. I would appreciate it if those things could be taken into consideration 💛

part. 01 | series masterlist | part 03

theofficialyn

liked by mickschumacher, lewishamilton and others

theofficialyn We worked day and night to create the confiest and safest boots without losing its fashion sense. I am really proud to announce that we are launching one more colletion 🤎 I am still testing all the possibilities and designs to deliver only the best, but soon enought these babies and the rest of our collection will be at the stores ready to create good memories along with you guys 🤍 ynthebrand is really grateful for all the love! Check our website and account for more infos.

view all 5430 comments

sunshineyn OMG THESE ARE FANTASTIC, YN, YOU KEEP OUTDOING YOURSELF!!!!

lewishamilton I keep waiting for you to design man shoes, would most def wear them all the time

disneyf1mick I see a certain golden retriever pilot lurking around the likes 👄

user00 I just find really funny how she’s outed as Lewis sister and suddently theres a new collection being launched…

⤷ carloscars omg yall like to theorize everything, get a grip!

⤷ ynpoptart she’s been talking about this launch for months now, the date was already set, the Lewis incident have nothing to do with it. That’s why she did not want people to know he is her brother, because there are some shitty people like you that will try to dimish her hard work. Honestly, I feel sorry for your fan base, must be a toxic environment.

ynfantastic what about the heels she was wearing last pic? 😫

⤷ sunshine198 I think she’s launching it next, or maybe it was just a test?

⤷ theofficialyn they are on this collection, love! will launch it soon 🤍

⤷ ynfantastic OMG SHE ACTUALLY ANSWERED, HEY QUEEN ILYSM

user10 would never use them, they look kinda ugly and unsafe as well.

mickschumacher

liked by georgerussell63, mercedesamgf1 and others

mickschumacher Good that everyone got the “crossed arms” memo @mercedesamgf1

view all 928 comments

schumachereign He looks waaaay too handsome ugh

⤷ f1racing2 toto, mick or the other guy?

⤷ schumachereign honestly, all of them lol

theofficialyn the energy is immaculate

⤷ ynnyc mother???? what are you doing here?

⤷ charlessainz2 god forbid but I already pictured her and mick dating, where are my fic writes at ✍🏾✍🏾✍🏾

georgerussell63 you guys rock! 🖤

theofficialyn stories

theofficialyn

liked by zendaya, mercedesamgf1 and others

theofficialyn Going through a list of vegan places 💚😋

view all 3,230 comments

mickschumacher 🐟🐟🐟

⤷ theofficialyn HAHAHAHA I HATE YOU!

⤷ f1fantastic your honor, they're in love.

⤷ potteryn they have their inside jokes already. It's their world, we’re just living in it

fan2 You look stunning 😭😭😭

lewishamilton The only reason I forgive you for not going with me is because you’re bringing it home as well 🤨

⤷ theofficialyn You’re the one who told me you did not wanna come!!!

⤷ abcdyn I wonder who she could be going with 😗

charles_leclerc I am counting on a bag of vegan donuts at my desk again this weekend to give me luck…just saying 🚶🏻

⤷ pierregasly he’s actually begging, yn

ynautumn how does it feel to be this pretty?

estebanocon 😍😍

⤷ charleslechair OMG WHAT IS THAT?? *nicki minaj voices*

⤷ norrisfav I thought Pierre was into this steal-your-girl thing not you, Esteban

ynandf1 the whole grid loves her and it shows

swiftieyln Im so happy seeing yn after she was outed as lewis sister, she looks less afraid to be herself, and she’s been feeding us sm I can only say thank you to the holy trinity

sainzsaint charles, pierre and esteban are here too, now y'all gonna say they're dating her as well?

⤷ estiebestie98 yes.

********************

make sure you like and reblog <3 feel free to talk to me as well, my inbox is always open!

wanna be tagged on my stories? click here

[agirlwithglam]

how to develop self love and confidence

— a step by step guide by yours truly ♥

disclaimer!! for some people it can take a lot longer to love themselves than others, so don't be discouraged if it takes a bit longer. just remember that no matter what you think, you ARE WORTHY OF LOVE.

step 1: identifying the root cause

first you need to find WHY you dont love yourself. it usually comes down to these main reasons:

society

your looks

comparison

your abilities

childhood trauma

your current situations

it can be just one or more than one, and sometimes it may not be as simple as "my looks", sometimes you may have to dig deeper.

for me, it was because i thought i was "ugly"

step 2: once you know the WHY, research about the topic and try and solve it.

here ive broken down the 6 reasons to help you a bit: (but remember that this is just a small break down, if you want you can research more about the topic & try to battle it)

society: society has tricked us into believing that loving yourself is considered 'vain' or 'narcissistic'. let me tell you right now that THAT IS NOT TRUE. loving yourself is a basic necessity that everyone should have!!

your looks: this is something i struggled with for a loong time. remember that beauty is subjective!! bob could think that travis looks 'average' but Leo could think that travis looks absolutely gorgeous!! ☆ so how did i overcome this? i actually 'glowed up'. bc the main thing i didnt like was face- my teeth to be specific. so once i got braces, my teeth aligned and i started looking so much better. ☆ other struggles: ↴ for you if it may be acne, then you could start trying to take care of your skin better. or if its body image then if you reeeeally dont like it then literally just start working out. if you have the option to yet you still dont then dont complain. but remember that ALL BODIES ARE PERFECT. ★ another thing that helped me a lot was affirmations! i listened to a bunch of affirmations -> i used this video by thewizardliz and it did wonders! (you can also search up on yt self-love/ beauty affirmations)

comparison: for most people comparison comes from social media right? the simple solution to this would be unfollow accounts that dont serve you, or delete/ set a time limit on the social media platform "but what if i compare myself to people i meet in real life?" well we can't exactly unfollow or delete these people but what we can do is turn that jealousy (yes, jealousy) into inspiration! be inspired by the people with greater lives and use that to pull yourself forward! ☆ a quote that i read once (that may or may not help you) : "do not compare your chapter 1 to someone else's chapter 50." you never know what the other person has gone through or is going through that got them to this point!

your abilities: okay theres not much i can say here except that you can learn almost everything online nowadays. stop complaining and get off your lazy butt to prove to yourself just how much potential you have! (but don't beat yourself up for being a lazy butt, im one as well) here is a link to a TON of stuff you can learn online!

childhood trauma: this is a bit of a more delicate subject which i do not know a lot on, my best suggestion would be to just go to therapy (or use an online therapy app- betterhelp). - watching thewizardliz may help as well as she might know more about the topic.

your current situation: whether its trouble with friends, at school, at work, or with family i promise you that these things do not last forever. humans were not put on earth to be unhappy and miserable! (whats the point in that?) my advice is to learn more about the topic (for ex i was struggling with being left out w friends for a while and it did hurt a bit) and see what you can do to fix it or at least make the best out of it. + another reminder that you can use the law of assumption- in basic words the law states that whatever you desire, you have. all you need to do is accept that. heres a quote i read: "if you dont like where you are,, then move. you aint a tree." this is literally YOUR life. RESPECT yourself and dont let people treat you bad because that is disrespecting yourself!

step 3: focus on yourself!!

my favourite step!!

this is your sign to stop focussing on others' lives and start focussing on your own.

when you start to focus on yourself, up level yourself and try to become your best version of yourself, you actually end up falling in love with that version of yourself, and your current version!

ask yourself: is there even something to love?

ask yourself: would you want to date or be friends with someone like you? think actually deep about this; if your answer is no, then that obviously means that there is some work to do.

if you're constantly negative and complaining and rude all the time, trust me, literally no ones gonna want to hang out with you. and then you'll adopt that 'victim mindset' of "nobody likes me and i suck". instead of doing that, why dont you try to just suck a bit less? there isn't any pressure on you to become amazing the next day, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try.

small things/habits to start:

gratitude

hydration

exercising

journalling

meditation

eating healthy

developing a skill

get enough sleep

take cold showers

taking care of your skin

invest in your appearance

focussing on school/ your grades

go outside! go for walks, be in nature!

changing what you consume (resources below)

some resources that helped me SO MUCH:

♡ thewizardliz

♡ tam kaur

♡ persephone's mind

and meditation! its so extremely underated but SO VALUABLE.

xoxo, vanilla

[lullabesstie]

As an Elucien shipper, have you ever come across any Elriels who understand that Elucien is endgame? I'm an Elriel myself. I enjoy the thought of light and dark or the cute girl who finds solace in the brooding male or the standoffish male whose weakness is the sweet girl. Its a theme that ill admit I'm a sucker for.

however, I have enough comprehension to understand that Elucien is endgame. I can see the hints and breadcrumbs that have been left for the readers. For a moment I was sad because I thought maybe it was a false flag, but there is too many pieces of evidence left behind for me to ignore. Plus after Azriel's BC, I knew it was over.

I can appreciate the thought of Elriel and the fantasy behind it, but I completely understand that Elucien just fits a little better. I tried to speak my mind on this in subredits and other forums but I was quickly harassed and told that I wasn't a true Elriel shipper because I was 'betraying my side'. Like, Im just here for the art and fanfiction fam, what do you mean the other side lmao. Ive been bullied on several platforms because I have said that I like elriel even though I know it isn't endgame. I'm just honestly confused why people who ship Elriel HAVE to believe they are endgame in order for you to be a 'true fan'.

I just wanted to know, are there more people like me out there? I have liked many Elucien blogs and posts because I like the art as well and have found the points of arguments compelling.

No, you might be the first Elriel i see that think Elucien is endgame lol

I think it’s very cool to find an Elriel who actually believe other ships can happen, every Elriel I’ve met always call me delusional for thinking Gwynriel might happen or calling me weird for shipping Elain and her mate.

Before ACOSF comes out I shipped Elriel for fun, but I’ve always known that she will go with Lucien, just like you I liked the vibe between them, the cute girl with the not very cute guy, light and dark. but it was painfully obvious they are not endgame, Elain does not bring the best out of Azriel and Azriel does not bring the best out of Elain.

But then when ACOSF got leaked, people said the leaks basically confirm Elriel, I was shocked to be fair because I thought it’s gonna be Elain and Lucien, but then when i read the book, i was like where is the confirmation? Elain and Azriel in the whole book did not even talk!

and from the plot view, from where the plot was going it was very obvious Elucien will happen. and then I noticed the interactions with Gwyn and Azriel, then I read the bonus chapter, there, Sarah clearly killed the ship. if you know Sarah, a spark in the chest is more romantic than wanting to go down on someone lol.

Same, I don’t like the fact that if you ship someone then this someone have to happen, I shipped Elriel but I knew they will never be endgame, shipping is for fun, you can continue to ship two people even if they didn’t end up together it’s fine!

So yes, before ACOSF I was like you I shipped Elriel knowing that they will not be endgame, but after ACOSF and the bonus chapter i couldn’t continue shipping them because it was painfully obvious

[simplespacedust]

hey so i'm gonna talk about pro-shippers because i feel like none of you have critical thinking skills.

please, if you are going to read this, read to the end because there are multiple parts to my argument.

SOMETHING IMPORTANT: i don't think it is okay to doxx, harass, or send death threats to people on the internet! if you send death threats to people, you are awful! if you go out of your way to harass people when they tell you to leave them alone, you are awful! if someone says something you don't like, talk with them like a normal fucking person jesus christ! if you repeatedly harass a pro-shipper, you are not helping them get any better!

firstly, in terms of "problematic" stuff in mainstream media, most component people can recognize when a piece of media is commenting on something with the use of a relationship/something problematic as a metaphor. just because something exists on-screen doesn't necessarily mean the message of the media endorses it. this is why you never (hopefully) see anyone getting upset about murder in movies. the piece of media is not saying murder is good. it is using it to make a commentary/characterize someone/etc.

now that we have set that precedent, we can move on to pro-shipping in fandom spaces. pro-shipping in fandom spaces if often fundamentally different between than the more general category of just "relationships in media." in fandom spaces, the tendency when creating art, writing fics, posting headcannons, etc. is for the purpose of personal/audience enjoyment. this is why pro-shipping is more often problematic within fandoms. if a person did want to create/add to problematic ships for a purpose other than getting off to it, that would be a different story! thats fine!

unfortunately, however, many pro-shippers do not proship for the literary merit/symbolism/characterization etc. many of them do it because they find the idea of parent-child or sibling-sibling relationships attractive. this is where the problem is. they symbol itself is not the problem, its the message/purpose of the work/art/headcannon itself.

i hear a lot of people talking about how pro-shipping is often a coping mechanism for dealing with trauma a person has experienced. my response to that? KEEP IT TO YOURSELF AND GO TO THERAPY!!!! if you are having to resort to jacking off to fictional incest to cope, then clearly you need the help of a professional to work through your issues! if you cannot for whatever reason, still keep it to yourself!

it is well understood that people are influenced by the opinions of people around them/what they see and interact with. putting out bullshit on the internet that portrays problematic relationships as desirable can one, create a pedophile safe space, and two, unintentionally (or maybe even intentionally!) expose children to these types of relationships and make it seem normal in their brains, which could cause them to not speak up about it if something bad does actually happen to them! even if a person shouldn't be in a space, they are! it doesn't harm you to not post the porn you wrote of that one kid and his dad from south park. and that only talks about adult only spaces, i have seen a shit ton of pro-shippers on tiktok, a platform marketed towards minors.

ANOTHER SIDE NOTE (i have a lot to say and am terrible at organizing my thoughts srry) is that a lot of times pro-shippers infiltrate general fandom hashtags. a child who is scrolling though a bluey hashtag on tiktok should not have any risk of running into someone on the internet describing how bluey's dad would r4p3 her!

you may think that because you are only talking about fictional characters and "its a coping mechanism" its okay, but it is most certainly not! not all coping mechanisms are healthy and what you post on the internet most CERTAINLY has a real effect on people. this is basic media literacy and critical thinking, guys. stop posting child/sibling smut headcannons on the internet! it is absolutely vile!

with all of that being said, (i said this at the beginning but i am going to say it again) i still dont think it is okay to doxx, harass, or send death threats to people on the internet! if you send death threats to people, you are awful! if you go out of your way to harass people when they tell you to leave them alone, you are awful! if someone says something you dont like, talk with them like a normal fucking person jesus christ! if you repeatedly harass a pro-shipper, you are not helping them get any better!

(im gonna put a bunch of proshipper hashtags at the bottom of this to reach the targeted demographic, i am NOT a proshipper, i am NOT an "anti anti" and i do NOT believe proshippers are valid, again, this is just for reach just to be clear)