#im having the time of my life ngl
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march 7th and dan heng are just babysitting me
except they're mostly just watching me as i dig around in trash cans and steal mail and stand in the way of public transport
im their baby brother who gained consciousness a few hours ago and they're my older siblings who just put up with my bullshit
#im having the time of my life ngl#honkai star rail#ilysm#were family bc i said so#the vibes are strong oooooughhh#i got a whole ass profile pic for digging around in the trash#amazing stuff#does anyone wanna be friends in hsr or 👉👈🥺#fuck no no more brainrot i cant handle this fuckfuckfuf😭😭😭🫣
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Shen Qingqiu is blowing up the System with his mind rn
[ID: A Scum Villain Comic. First image depicts Shen Qingqiu within the Water Prison, kneeling on the ground with his arms and wrists tied with immortal binding cables. He wears a nervous expression while the System screen next to him with a cheering kaomoji goes "Checking In." to which SQQ reponds "i'm bad". The next image depicts SQQ with now ripped robes holding his tied hands in front of him while Luo Binghe stands facing away from him in the foreground. LBH is holding his hands up to his face with a flustered expression whilst SQQ is looking at his back with a very confused expression and "???" next to him. A caption above them states "One Wife Plot Experience Later..." The final image is in a chibi style. SQQ glares at the system as it says with a smug look "Checking In" to which SQQ responds "i'm doing bad" End ID]
#svsss#scum villain#shen qingqiu#the system#svsss system#luo binghe#bingqiu#mxtx#myart#this is how the whole water prison arc felt to me#sqq was ready to choke the system out for all the shit it was pulling lmao#also feats my fave oblivious sqq moment “why am i experiencing all these wife plots im the villain”#yeah sure sir whatever helps you sleep at night <3#lbh was fighting for his Life when the robes ripped (and he was already having a hard time seeing sqq tied up ngl)#also sqq wearing light colored robes during his widow arc is one of my fave headcanons mostly cause i think he did it untentionally
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new tortured soul dropped
#im back in my gothic horror and 19th ct novel era and its terminal#anyway i made a new guy... hes a murdered musician but he came back ✌️ (wrong)#and now hes out to end an entire bloodline#sketch#original character#artists on tumblr#illustration#frankenstein#body horror#my art#ghouldraws#long time no poast.... sorry for my absence i havent really felt like doing much digital art lol#ngl though i have been thinking of opening a comm slot since its been a really long time afdhdjfk#like 2 years#anyway i don't have a name for this freak but what good is a name without a life to live it with anyway <3 its over for him#makes a playlist for him and its all just musical adaptations of the novels that inspired him#im great at thissss#i like sketching in b/w :] maybe i will do more
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fallen
#KICKS OPEN THE DOOR. HIIIIIII IM BAAAAAACK. TWIRLS MY HAIR AND STARES UNBLINKINGLY AT U#okay so long story short i need to speedrun if i wanna draw ANY lore art this time#bc i go to NY w no computer for 2 weeks on thurs and i wont have nrainrot anymore after. so i need to draw FAST things#so yea. she um. she. died. sniffles. ngl i thought she was already dead from the prev update so this STUNG#the fuckign GRIEF the way lilia collapses down in mourning her loss. she falls to the humans. i am SICK it HURTS#silver was so devastated in 7.5 without even seeing the death firsthand and being like 'how could i ever be loved'#lilia looking at malleus. the future of the kingdom. the treasure of his two closest friends (loves?)#and is like 'how can i ever love him enough' and proceeds to spend A FIFTH OF HIS LIFE SEARCHING FOR A SOLUTION#dealing w prejudice from humans. kicked out of the army Disgraced. all while mourning. he keeps going out of LOVE#twst#twisted wonderland#lilia vanrouge#malleus draconia#hes an egg he counts#ch 7 spoilers#so yea blah blah blah im not as eloquent as u geniuses i will just draw a silly little dramatic art to capture my misery and move forward#suntails
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Beatriceeeee
#beatrice trudeau#ngl the first time I saw the name Beatrice in my life I thought it said “Beat Rice” teehee yeah#SCHOOL IS KILLING MEEE AGGHHH#so many funny things have happened at school this week it’s WILD#I should be sleeeeepinggg#bully canis canem edit#bully rockstar#bully game#bully cce#rockstar games#bully scholarship edition#digital art#digital fanart#procreate#illustration#Im
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GUESS WHO I'M DRAWING NOOOOWWWWW~!!!!
#the angle is SO. WEIRD for the clothes lmao#it's actually fucking me up lol#i love this silly little guy#he's full of whimsy and murderous intent! /silly#i love how he IMMEDIATELY went to brag about his INSANE grinding for the enchanting skill to tubbo???? great. 10/10 no notes#you can HEAR he was having THE TIME of HIS LIFE with tub tub's reactions lmfaooo#also the fact he's planning to make everyone compete on like. saw type shit /silly to get RIDICULOUSLY OP gear is SO him...#i automatically thought “oh so he REALLY liked the idea of The Peace Trials huh?” lmaoo#currently laying down bc my back hurts/is bothering me like a 5 year old asking if u have games on ur phone :((((#(I've been sitting on my pc drawing for most of the day lol)#anyway#demon shares wips™#clownpierce#the realm smp#the realm fanart#clownpierce fanart#trsmp#trsmp fanart#i have SUCH ideas for the other ppl btw....#idk if I'll make them like. permanent designs???? (besides clown ofc) but i WILL try them out bc it'll be fun!#they're my barbie dolls and I'm dressing them up for my tea party aight?#ALL of the trsmp design I'll make WILL be based off wadanohara and the great blue sea btw#bc i can#and it's fun#im thinking#foolish as mikotsuhime. pangi as regular wadda. bad as either totsusahime or chlomaki. hannah as tatsumiya. tubbo as uomihime#phil as laurentia. sneeg as adauchi. whoever tf else was in their initial trio as ver million#MMmMmMmMmmMmmMMmMmMmnMMmMMMm idk where i can fit roscumber as clown's apprentice. might shuffle things around for that.......#hm.#honestly i can make tommy as chlomaki and charlie as lobco ngl. that could work.......
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Sebastian had a few days leave from duty so he visited Eloise😇😇
#im literally OBSESSED with Eloise😩#and this AU😇🙏#they are maybe late 20s/early 30s here I wanted to experiment a bit#anyways I was reading A Little Life at the beach today#and ngl I was tearing up literally ALL the time!!! 😤😤😤#it’s just so beautifully written & I find myself relating so heavily and I get gut punches every few pages where I need to stop reading#and just process it#idk maybe I am sentimental today LOL#It’s just…it’s making me think about the fact that I’ve never really Belonged in any one place and neither have the characters#my mom is the product of Bulgarian/swedish immigrants to the US and my dad is a Spanish pueblo man 😂#and their experiences/culture/languages etc etc have shaped my life soooooooo much🙏#but like at the same time. too reserved to truly fit in with the Spanish but too open/blunt for the midwest#idk it is weird to explain#anyways I just keep moving forward & make my own way🙏🙏🙏#thank you for coming to my free Therapy Session in the hashtags (bc nobody reads these😂😂😂😂)#also if you did & you also read a little life please🙏 or if you want to talk about books in general🙏🙏#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanart#hphl#sebastian sallow#hogwarts legacy mc#hogwarts legacy oc#eloise#oh also this is a recreation of a Porco Rosso scene😇😇🙏🙏#but I changed the colors a LOT & also a bit more when I sketched it up
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don't ask me why, but me and my friend were talking about how carlos is going to be free from fraudrrari in less than 20 days and we ended up comparing him to the virgin mary (i swear it will make sense and we both grew up in christian italian families as atheists) and... how her given festivities actually add up with some of his important dates ??? buckle up!
‧˚
⭒ "Festa dell'Assunzione di Maria" — august 15 she was raised to eternal life without bodily death, and very close to it carlos announced he signed with williams.
⭒ "La Natività della Beata Vergine Maria" — she was born on september 8th, he was born on september 1st (BOTH VIRGOS)!
⭒ "L'Immacolata Concezione" — december 8th, "from the first moment of her conception, the Blessed Virgin Mary was, by the singular grace and privilege of Almighty God, and in view of the merits of Jesus Christ, Savior of Mankind, kept free from all stain of original sin."... and what happens on december 8th? his last race in fraudrrari, exactly.
she was the lightly brushed by melancholy blue print after all!
#il vaticano hates to see us drop this hits ngl#i show my hatred for this religion by blasphemingly ruining their iconographies with these posts😋#you thought you saw everything with carlos being san sebastiano NOW GET READY FOR CARLOS BEING THE VIRGIN MARY!!!!#another hit post if i know my chickens well#no but fr#what were the fucking odds of the dates being actually so similiar???#carlos sainz jr and christian iconography? sign me tf up#virgin mary#frauddrari's worst nightmare bc they're always comparing the other one to the pope and carlos gets compare to LUCIFERO#SAN SEBASTIANO#LA VERGINE MARIA#c'è chi puo' e chi non puo' 😮💨#carlos is just so mystical and lovable you can't help but compare him and worship him like a god#(he's just a man and im a 23yr old teenager with mental issues and a lot of time to think)#this being said#he also gave birth a lot this year#and he's finally about to be free of sin🥴#is this considered web weaving?#leave it to him to be so poetic in just living that my brain automatically does this#lando being god's lamb and him the virgin mary GET A BETTER DUO#maybe its because maria was always a figure that stuck with me more than anyone in the bible and her sufferings and her not having really#much of a choice in her life and having to accept her faith... idk#but this makes sense in my head#carlos sainz jr web weaving#carlos sainz jr#carlitos#cs55#f1#formula 1#carlando
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happy TWO YEAR anniversary to everyone who attended the destiel wedding!
and happy valentines day to the rest of you guys <3 click the image for a surprise!
if you’ve ever seen that one post (i’ll link it in the replies) about the parallels between the rodeo scene in 12x11 and the movie “urban cowboy” and it entirely broke your brain, then this post is for you. and also i’m kissing you on the mouth
[ID. Digital art of Dean Winchester done in black and white. He’s is laid back on top of an electric bull. One hand rests on his hip while the other hovers in mid-air, fingers slightly curled, and he seems to be looking at it. When clicked, the transparency shows Castiel standing behind him. Castiel is holding Dean’s hand to his lips, while his other hand supports the back of Dean’s head. Castiel has a visible halo and wings that he has curled protectively around Dean. End ID.]
#destiel wedding anniversary#destiel#destiel fanart#spn#spn fanart#dean winchester#castiel#ficta et picta#a personal blogging experience#PLEASE NOTE THAT THE SURPRISE ONLY WORKS IN LIGHT MODE#if you clicked the picture and nothing changed then you're using the app/website in sth other than light mode and thatll just not work sry#anyway shoutout to tumblr users nottherealdean and sagegarnish ill hopefully remember to add their post in the replies in a minute#but thanks to them i have not and WILL never be normal about that scene.#nearly TWO YEARS this concept has been swimming in my head and now FINALLY i had the skills and idea to fully COMMIT#also im ngl this is one of those pieces that i only meant to quickly sketch out and then work on later#and instead it turned into a one-time five-hour sorta hyperfocus tunnel job#and i was so IMMEDIATELY pleased with the outcome and i still am. this has absolutely become one of my favourite destiel fanart pieces#that ive ever made. <3 these idiots are ruining my life and its chronic
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Blorbo's Eepiest Soldier
Thank you everyone for your kind words, I'm doing better and am back to it <3
#helloo!#thank you all for the well wishes#I have really appreciated every kind word#I'm doing better now and have gotten back to school work#i am so eepy though#eepiest soldier#im also being overworked on my capstone game team and the team lead even told me shes over working me so thats#fun#counting going to this capstone class and meetings and such im putting like 25+ hours in a week for it#and i do have 2 other classes#and a social life i enjoy having#haha#but im happy to do the work cause its good portfolio stuff#except when my producer comes up to me and says "yknow how ur in charge of all the 2d art and concepting and branding and ui and pr? yeah g#make a 3-4 page detailed comic for plot at the start of our game cause we dont wanna cut plot (even tho we dont have time for it) and we#dont wanna show plot through interactable objects and dialogue/text so more work for you even tho u legit dont have time for it#ngl tho i have genuinely been enjoying designing icons and doing model concepts#i made some fire designs recently#please hire me a game company tm#anyway enough of capstone talk#love you all!!!#im excited to graduate and finally be able to change my bio!!#hope you all have a very lovely rest of your day <33#furry#fursona#digital art#art#eepy
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It's hard being someone who does genuinely get infuriated with Ford's actions and acknowledges a lot of his flaws and the people he hurt, while also liking (and relating) to his character enough that I would like him to have nice things sometimes and don't believe he's satan
#hes not my favorite guy#but i keep having to defend him because every time people talk about him its like “YEAH HES A SHITBAG WHO WANTS TO WATCH HIS BROTHER DIE”#“HED PROBABLY LAUGH IN HIS FACE WHILE HE GETS MAULED BY TIGERS”#when i was reading the fanfic O Brother I too thought he was being overly cruel to poor Stanley (in a way that made sense not an ooc way)#but then he like found out the deity that was his entire life was lying to him and that he hurt people#and that he no longer can SLEEP because hell hurt people again#and he has to figure out the impossible answer of what to do while everyone is upset and untrusting of him#and his best and only friend barely can LOOK at him#and all the comments are like “YEAH THIS IS WHAT HE DESERVES!!! FUCK YOU STANFORD”#meanwhile im over here like “oh my god thats so fucking awful!!! i feel so bad!!!”#like he genuinely has NO ONE right then thats fucking awful#its Jonathan Sims all over again except even the AUDIENCE hates him and like?????? please hes just misguided he does NOT deserve this#stanford pines#ford pines#gravity falls#again let me clarify HES NOT EVEN MY FAVORITE GUY#i obsess over him occasionally but im a Stanley defender through and through AND YET#i keep having to say “guys. hes not as bad as you guys think. and Stan isn't as GOOD as you guys think. GUYS. PLEASE.”#it truly is interesting how different focuses on characters influence the audiences perspective of them SO MUCH#because ngl remember how i mentioned J Sims?#i really feel like Jon and Ford are similar#meddled with deities they didn’t understand. had paranoid tendencies. isolated themselves often. had selfish tendencies.#often rude and abrasive but also had a heart#and again the audience LOVES Jon and hates characters for disliking him#but this audience (which probably is the same people too lol) hate Ford and feel vindicated when characters dislike him
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hi
i need hugs i cant stop crying today :(
#carrie posting#also hi sorry for the lack of update things just been rough ngl its just a rollercoaster#ups and downs constantly#and i realized if i want my life to just be one steady line i guess just being a lonef or teh time being is all i have.#...#but i wanan make friens i love talkign to ppl n such....idk#and lmao how my is my friendship life so fuckign down teh drain and i really out here thinking about dating like bro#im a mess im erally am a mess#anyways wahts up :)
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shoutout 2 this person in my class who i can tell wants 2 talk 2 me really bad but instead of doing that whenever she has the chance she'll talk 2 whoever else is around and ignore me entirely unless im mentioned by name
#bruh lmao#so awkward. say something you dingus lol#ik you wanna talk 2 me so bite the bullet already#gyatt#spacie spoinks#literally. she was having a conversation with my partner for the project im doing. and like#heres the thing#if im not invited into conversation i usually dont participate#im like a vampire like that#and so like. after they're done conversating she'll just kind of. stand there. this has happened twice now#like dude sdkfjshlkdfj#im not upset by this behavior i have very awful social patterns as well and have been thru this (i am autistic)#am i gonna hafta say something. lol#probably#''hey bro whats up with you. i dont mean like how are you doing. i mean like. whats wrong with you.''#cant say that its not funny when you say it irl only when the ppl you're talking with know you're not being mean 😭#also like. this person has been staring at me lol#which like. makes me flustered so whenever she's around i panic and my face fucking turns red its god awful#for awhile it made uhh. my paranoia get really bad im ngl!!#its already bad when it comes 2 being around strangers but this like made it REALLY bad for a few weeks#im more calm now tho. rational brain won over and im chillin#i gotta work up the courage 2 say something b4 the semester is over or this is gonna bother me for the rest of my life sfkjsdhflkjs#i dont wanna put her on the spot#the only time i see her is when im in class#and . doing that interaction in front of ppl. i dont wanna embarrass her ksjfskjd
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where’s that little horror piece about kits never growing up in Starclan? because I remember it so vividly but I can’t find it.
The one about Bright Stream?
Weird that it's so hard to find! It's probably because it's got such heavy tags lmao.
I really mean it though like, canon's permakitten system and the idea that Bright Stream is up there, forever taking care of fetus children who were filled by sudden knowledge and yet never grow past that point absolutely horrifies me. Jesus Christ. I don't know how anyone reads that final scene in Path of Stars and isn't filled with itching, white-hot existential dread, man.
Sometimes you just gotta write horror about it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#partner and i were joking the other day about how like#they are the one known as The Horror Blogger and im the funny cat guy#because it's literally the opposite irl. you have NO idea#They are the one who is squeamish and I am the one that is like#only scared if there's 17 different kinds of existential horror#Which tbf is important in my line of work#But let me tell YOU. One thing that gets me every time? Fucked up afterlives#Probably from all the religious trauma but. Still.#''turns out your whole life is actually teetering on the precipice of a steep drop into the jaws of unknowable gods--#and their concept of omnibenevolent and omnimalevolent are self-defined''#''in death your life only has meaning to those still living and yet you're conscious to experience it''#''you will helplessly watch people you thought loved YOU reduce your memory into how you SERVED them''#''Powerless to stop it you will find that you were only valued as a tool in someone else's life''#''There is no peace in death just being tired and uncomfortable forever''#EURGH#It's why my most feared monsters are actually ghosts and vampires and certain zombies#Because it's not really about the monster it's more about what that monster implies for the afterlife#Certain zombies especially. ngl. Night of the livin dead 2 has the scariest ones ever#Intelligent. Violent. Able to FEEL themselves rotting and the only relief is to consume everything you ever loved#BRR#they did eat a bunch of cops tho so... at least they have that going for them#BONES MCRAMBLES IN THE TAGS#bone babble
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the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍
#struggling to tolerate this one ngl its fucking dire this weekend. i just cant do this man#thr things i would fucking do for attention please. just one person to notice and care in the slighest i feel like im losing my fucking#mind out here how does every single person who has ever mattered to me in my lifr see me in distress and choose to ignore it or maybe they#dont even recognise im ij distress in the first place i dont know whats worse i dont think i hide it well at all im just so done#listen like ultimately its fucking fine. i will get myself through it like ive gotten myself through everything else in my fuckijg life#i dont even feel bad that often these days im doing so so so much better and its so much more tolerable to only have to deal with this#once or twice a week instead of it being a struggle every single day like i dont think i could go back to feeling like that again ever i#dont know how i managed to get througyh it before jesus fucking christ. but i can deal with it i can deal with this#ik ill feel fine tomorrow. its just thr fact im so desperately fucking alone with it that makes it so much worse than it has to be#i fucking hate repression i hate being so incapable of expressing myself that its easier for me to injure myself than it is to talk about#how i feel to anyone i hate being trapped in this stupif fucking torture labyrinth and not knowing how to get out of it and never being#given a single avenue anything to hold onto i hate having to do it alone every single fucking time and when i do try i just freeze out#entirely i cant form a coherent thought my brain enters total fucking shutdown pure static white noise fuzz and i dont know why please#its so unfair i dont think its that much to want a little comfort. just once just for someone to stay with me while i cry it doesnt have#to be more than that i just dont want to be alone like this i just want to feel safe around someone just close to someone just once#and well ill survive without it bc i always have i guess. so far at least. and there are many things im grateful for and i do in general#feel pretty okay my life is pretty good at times even. i feel so pathetic and stupid and ashamed for even feeling like this#but do i have to go my entire life without ever experiencing any kind of real intimacy with another person emotionally that is#i mean physical is nice too and they go hand in hand in some ways but i just want to feel seen and safe over anything.im tired#i feel like i try.but not hard enough i know its all my fault really but i dont know how to try any harder but nothing will ever change if#i dont i cant expect anyone to do anything if i cant rven communicate in thr first place. oh i dont want to think about it anymore#i have a headache from crhing and its not even 8pm ugh. okay. well it is what it is.#ill breathe until i calm down and then tidy up whatever i left in the kitchen and get my work stuff ready for tmr#and polish my boots maybe. and read and go to bed at 9:30 i think. and ill feel fine in the morning#my fault for thinking about it earlier i know i shouldve nipped it earlier on its such an easy spiral to fall into i need to get better#it happens. okay anyway. no cause for concern im good guys. weakly thumbs up at the camera all covered in blood#my period is late actually thats probably all this is lmao. makes sense thinking abt it#cant wait for it to finally start and all earthly desire to leave my body so i never experience pain again amen#.vent#ignore this sorry for being mentally ill im not even that mentally ill anymore so no excuse rly ummmm. bit embarrassing innit.
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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