#im chronic i am so chronic
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wasn't really gonna post anything about it but its been cooking on the backburner for *checks* months now so now all of you will know about this
phighting x rhythm doctor au.. hgrgh-
#im chronic i am so chronic#please help#uhm#help#medkit phighting#subspace phighting#( not a ship do not tag as a ship.. just incase anyone reblogs )#phighting!#rhythm doctor#im sorry fellow rd fans you will now be exposed to this insanity#not that the custom levels are much better /playful
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Body swap movie where one of them has invisible disabilities and when the other one lands in their body they immediately collapse catatonic on the floor from the pain and fatigue and the first one is like 'oh damn guess I don't have to worry that I'm faking it anymore'
#i have this fantasy of one my able bodied friends and or coworkers occupying my body for like an hour#just to get a real sense of how much i am truly weathering hellfire every day of my life#sometimes i take stock and im like holy crap ive gotten so used to so much#im a frog in a pot and ive convinced myself the bubbling is just fun ambience#my thoughts#invisible disability#chronic illness#chronic pain
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i am unreasonably proud and excited about this
#disability#chronic pain#mobility aid#i am officially running a thing to make my university accessible#i am so ready to fight people over it and I've recruited a bunch of people#we may or may not end up in our local news too#im done with this shit#literally on Friday had to walk around the building bc the elevator broke again and i couldn't do stairs#should take 30 seconds instead took like 10 minutes
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finally colored that Eddie scribble <3 rough day p.2!
#am i happy with this? no! but im tired of messing with it so this is what we get#i mean its not Bad but. sigh#i gotta get better at coloring stuff its my Art Weakness#no matter how much i try i cannot understand color theory#my brain simply says No <3#i have perfect color vision and yet. and fucking yet. cant use it for shit! yeehaw!#scribble garnish#welcome home#welcome home puppet show#eddie dear#i hope he enjoys that ice cold soda - sold exclusively at howdys for a stellar deal only one hundred percen- *gunshot*#i would like everyone to know that i unironically initially wrong 'seld' instead of 'sold'#and genuinely didnt know why there was a little red squiggle friend underneath it for a solid minute#the brain is rotting <3 i go outside and the ravens start divebombing <3#i am living up to my url of 'carrion'#dead meat walkin babeyyyyyy#i think the chronic migraines are actually frying my neurons!!! yee! haw!
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something that genuinely annoys me as a chronically ill person is getting constantly asked only about my health. how are you? how are you dealing with it mentally? im the same as always. this is my normal. i don't want to be constantly asked about it. cant you be interested in something else about me. not my health. ask me about what I've been doing. what am i listening to. any fun dreams ive had. it gets really depressing very fast when every single interaction with others ends up starting with your chronic illnesses.
like i know it feels fucking different to you and you with your perfect health can't even imagine how someone is living like this. but this is my life. this is my normal. and id like to get treated like im more than just my illness
#rant#prompted by my grandma#i appreciate her caring but i do not like to feel negative every time im just telling her how my life is#why is it so hard for people to just accept that this is how i am right now and there is no guarantee im gonna be any better soon#the chronic in chronic illness is there for a reason#i hope this makes sense its 4am and im supposed to be asleep#chronic illness#chronically ill#disabled#disabilities#disability
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I cant post everything right now because my tumblr is slow but bro I gotta talk about how Vessel really went above and beyond today
His vocals are always insane but he really amped it up. The breakdowns, singing harmonies instead of the usual track and just generally giving it his all
It was fucking crazy also considering that performing without two of your bandmates and friends can be terrifying (for me anyway)
He kept bowing to us and doing little hand gestures it was the sweetest thing ever
#im gonna go home and cry#my chronically ill ass luckily took tomorrow off work#i am in agony but it was so worth it#i hope iv and iii feel better soon#sleep token#vessel#ii sleep token#eu 2024
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Hey You Reading This. Are you in Pain?
Go to this website. See of you can find the thing that's bothering you (pain patterns denoted in red/shaded areas).
Massage the X shown in the diagram. See if it helps.
If you want more information on treating muscle pain, download this book off the Internet Archive:
You deserve to not be in pain. If nothing else has helped, this might.
#fatals physio corner#chronic pain#ehlers danlos syndrome#hypermobility#im still writing that essay but the sun sets at 5pm and I am in agony so this will supplement#if the link has stopped working let me know and i will try to find a working one#or i will figure out how to share the pdf that i have
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Transcript:
Gabriel : Yes, I do know. It seems like you could even KILL OUR BABY for your career.
*whipcrack.mp3*
Gabriel : AGH!
V1 : What the fuck. How could you?
*whipcrack.mp3*
Gabriel : D-AGH!
*whipcrack.mp3*
Gabriel : Mmm...
End Transcription
Audio Source
#gabriel ultrakill#ultrakill#hey you know how i said the next few posts would be normal. well. im not sure this one counts.#you guys know how it is around here. i dont have to explain#so this is what the whiplash is really for... i see.#the implication that v1 is the one who is pregnant. this is a lot.#how am i supposed to transcribe these sounds. i will never know#i trust that you are all chronically online enough to know what this is about#had to leave the music for this one. it adds to the experience#oops i forgot the main tags
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stacy is sooo interesting because she's in love with house but knows that they will never ever be able to have a healthy, stable, sane relationship because they're too similar so. she finds house-lite instead and marries him and. essentially moves on with her life! and is successful in this because she's a moderately well-adjusted person!
wilson, in contrast, never manages to escape the inevitable, in spite of his best efforts to find a house-lite of his very own, because he's an absolute fucking freak and ends up glued to house to the bitter. bitter end
#yeah im too sleepy to revise this. UNFILTERED posting wooahh#some may b shocked but i do actually read thru most of my posts several times to make sure i didnt accidentally write mein kampfe 2#recently ive come to the realization that i am in fact not an incredibly chill person#and that the constant paranoia and fear in which i live my life is actually PROBABLY a symptom of severe anxiety#like damn. ive always known that im pretty prone to depression but ive preetty much always been aware of that#my mom is a chronic depressive so i know the symptoms i know the signs i have a pretty good arsenal of healthy coping mechanisms#UNFORTUNATELY mommy's mental health problems did not help her not abuse me as a child#so i ended up being a terribly anxious kid who was constantly being screamed at and told i was overreacting (because i was. because i had#a severe anxiety problem that was making me react irrationally.) to everything all the time#which is you know. it is VERY difficult to deal with a mental health problem when you arent aware you have a problem!#its incredible how much. better. my life has gotten since i figured this out and started actively trying to work out what triggers it#and being able to like. realize 'oookay. there is an Issue here and it needs to be overcome'#instead of just beating on myself constantly for not being able to do things without feeling sick or getting breathing problems!#anyways. trauma dumping in tags is over now!#house md#hilson#greg house#james wilson#stacy warner
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if phil said the december i mean october thing because he had a migraine and forgot his line i'm going to ceremonially kill myself as penance for talking about it so much. i'm so sick at the thought of him accidentally revealing personal information before he was ready. MANY SUCH CASES :(
#i think im pmsing because why am i taking this sooo seriously lmao#but also i was thinking about how migraines give me so much brain fog & aphasia#i cant imagine putting on a performance like this with chronic migraines#AND A BROKEN RIB#SOMEBODY HELP THIS MAN IM SERIOUS#not even trying to infantilize him like i think he's wayy more resilient and brave than i am#titspoilers#phan#*
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i had this in mind a few days ago while running on 2 hrs of sleep
decided to finally draw it lol
i have some more ideas in mind of them that i will hopefully get to get around drawing
#one piece#trafalgar law#monkey d. luffy#eustass kid#so the idea is like maybe they got to know each other as children cus they somehow lived in the same neighbourhood/got sent to the same#daycare right and the first day they met it seemed they already got like beef with each other#but its ok its their version of bonding :)#they definitely shit on eafch other with no hesitation#they still have their own respective groups (crews) but they just hang sometimes for no reason#like they get put in the same place at the same time. whoever is with them will be the unfortunate victim.#they still care for one another ofc just in their own roundabout way#i do still have some things i need to think about like do i still want to make law a sick boy#i mean i know i made him p pale in that drawing#cause im a sucker for whump ok#but then again waht am i making him sick with. is it gonna be chronic. is it just an unfortunate one time thing.#also if i make him to still be a sick boy theres gonna be a period in which luffys gonna be taller than him by the time theyre around#10-13 y.o. and then law just shot up like a beanstalk from 15-16. luffys gonna grieve. but its ok luffy you can be taller than him at 40#maybe#also the damn designs#law do you already have a beard by the time youre 16. it was not mentioned in the novel. i am conflicted.#also kids hair is fucking wild i almost cried drawing it#he doesnt wear lipstick in school. he does when hes hanging outside tho#luffys the most straightforward one i mean come on look at him#laws the one giving me headache cus fucker is canonically a 26 y.o man with facial hair#fanart#my art
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THEY EVEN TOOK HIS QUEEN
#i paused the ep and SCREAMED#i am losing my mind#live-blogging on main again I’m sorrreeeyyyy#rant about fma below if you care lol:#this is my first watch-thru of fma brotherhood and im rly enjoying it#i tried to read the manga a few years ago and had to stop early on (chimera arc iykyk) bc trauma but#the show is so good and theres some great storytelling / the depiction of the horrors of war/genoc!de rly hit hard#also roy mustang i am falling in love with you pleASE helP ME#i have a chronic addiction to this type of man i'd like to file a complaint with my pre-frontal cortex#royai#fma#blue rambles#roy mustang#riza hawkeye
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They're soulmates in every single universe and I miss them at the most random times.
#my characters#haha funny thing is that venus doesnt even exist in base plot she is ONLY for AUs#in base plot ego the ginger guy is a prince and serenity the navy haired guy is an energy alien#and serenity takes on the form of a human to be fake engaged to ego and its never meant to actually end up with them married#but serenity falls in love with the prince and feels immense guilt when they meet up#and then ego is like HAHA YEAH my life is the greatest cause i get to marry my best friend but technically youre best friend by default#since i have zero other friends because i cannot leave the castle which kinda sucks but whatever#and serenity can give his life force to others to keep them healthy and usually stops by to heal egos younger brother#so he looks tired a lot bc he is depleting his own life to help others#and and in au versions hes just chronically tired and very much in love with ego who is completely oblivious#and half the time they (bc theyre mine) are pining mutually thinking ahaha theres no WAY hed like me#or in egos case a lot of the time in the au its what if he only likes me cause i spoil him rotten bc im super wealthy and i love gifting#and serenity ! in base plot since he is an alien from like... space.... basically... another realm#he resides with another royal family in a different kingdom and the king there treats him like a son#which plays into the au versions where serenity is adopted and he just really loves his dad a lot#like really admires the man who adopted him and raised him as a single father who almost always has a connection to egos dad since#in base theyre just two kings being buddies and trying to get good relations between their kingdoms#but anyway ego is one of the few ocs i have that will actively say#I LOVE YOU SO MUCH : D very openly and i love that for him??#not a lot of my ocs will be that open about their feelings but ego is very good at communication and talking and stuff#compared to serenity who is an alien who doesnt even have to talk where he originated bc the aliens are just blue energy blobs#and they sense each other and communicate silently#so making him take a human form is like MMMM not sure how to interact like a normal human tbh#i owe art to one person then i am able to get back to indulgent stuff for me and reqs and stuff#this was just so i had something to post today since idk if the art i owe someone will be cool to post or not
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happy TWO YEAR anniversary to everyone who attended the destiel wedding!
and happy valentines day to the rest of you guys <3 click the image for a surprise!
if you’ve ever seen that one post (i’ll link it in the replies) about the parallels between the rodeo scene in 12x11 and the movie “urban cowboy” and it entirely broke your brain, then this post is for you. and also i’m kissing you on the mouth
[ID. Digital art of Dean Winchester done in black and white. He’s is laid back on top of an electric bull. One hand rests on his hip while the other hovers in mid-air, fingers slightly curled, and he seems to be looking at it. When clicked, the transparency shows Castiel standing behind him. Castiel is holding Dean’s hand to his lips, while his other hand supports the back of Dean’s head. Castiel has a visible halo and wings that he has curled protectively around Dean. End ID.]
#destiel wedding anniversary#destiel#destiel fanart#spn#spn fanart#dean winchester#castiel#ficta et picta#a personal blogging experience#PLEASE NOTE THAT THE SURPRISE ONLY WORKS IN LIGHT MODE#if you clicked the picture and nothing changed then you're using the app/website in sth other than light mode and thatll just not work sry#anyway shoutout to tumblr users nottherealdean and sagegarnish ill hopefully remember to add their post in the replies in a minute#but thanks to them i have not and WILL never be normal about that scene.#nearly TWO YEARS this concept has been swimming in my head and now FINALLY i had the skills and idea to fully COMMIT#also im ngl this is one of those pieces that i only meant to quickly sketch out and then work on later#and instead it turned into a one-time five-hour sorta hyperfocus tunnel job#and i was so IMMEDIATELY pleased with the outcome and i still am. this has absolutely become one of my favourite destiel fanart pieces#that ive ever made. <3 these idiots are ruining my life and its chronic
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you know when you're going through a high stress situation that is prolonged and agonizing but you've put on a brave face and you think you've got this! 💪 and then a week into it you accidentally burn your quinoa and there's smoke and all of a sudden your skin is sloughing off and you feel like alice about to be swept away in a tide of her own tears? mmnnmm yeag.
#i cant fucking do this not at all actually im very scared and i have no idea what im gonna ddo for money and yeah i am. so scared#money isn't even scary if i can just find a job! but i need an apartment but i can't find an apartment unless i can pay for the rent#and i have to contact The Dude at some point but uh. hes mad. im scared.#augh delete later probably. im sitting on the stairs outside and smoking a cigarette which i really shouldn't do#did I tell you i was scared. i have these cruel nightmares of roaming the streets looking for nala and not finding her#and i wake up in a cold sweat in a panic not knowing where i am. everything is so unfamiliar !!!!#if things ever work out for me if i can find the money for deposit or get my investments back somehow i swear i will spend a month in compl#ete silence staring at the cieling just processing this#right now everything feels so GO GO GO and i am scared it might break me. i do not have the time for chronic ilness right now yk.#tummy ache. chewing on my cheek.#nothing to do than try to stay positive but man. this really fucking sucks and is really unfair#who knew being a people pleaser with 0 boundaries would come back to bite me in the ass.#/groan/
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I just don't understand people who don't do a COVID test when they get sick
#like yes of course for some people thats not affordable#but for the vast majority money isnt the issue#i picked up a sore throat and congestion over the weekend and figured it was allergies#i was pretty damn sure but i coughed last night and thats unusual#so i bit the bullet and at 7 fucking am this morning i went and found a covid test before work#good thing too because by the time i got to work the test was positive#because of that im within the window for paxlovid#and i havent really exposed that many people#my brother in christ this shit kills people#its not the common cold#the responsible thing to do is to test when youre fucking sick#and isolate if you know its covid#i have no idea on what criteria i qualified for paxlovid but im guessing it was asthma#heres hoping my mcas doesnt throw a tantrum about this#its entirely possible i caught this from my coworker#who did not test at all and stopped wearing a mask after a day or two#they know about my health issues and i cant help but feel hurt about how little they cared about the possible consequences to me#i should be fine btw im not even feeling particularly sick#salt baby talks#disability#chronic illness
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