#we may or may not end up in our local news too

[an--artistic--autistic]

i am unreasonably proud and excited about this

[reasonsforhope]

No paywall version here.

"Two and a half years ago, when I was asked to help write the most authoritative report on climate change in the United States, I hesitated...

In the end, I said yes, but reluctantly. Frankly, I was sick of admonishing people about how bad things could get. Scientists have raised the alarm over and over again, and still the temperature rises. Extreme events like heat waves, floods and droughts are becoming more severe and frequent, exactly as we predicted they would. We were proved right. It didn’t seem to matter.

Our report, which was released on Tuesday, contains more dire warnings. There are plenty of new reasons for despair. Thanks to recent scientific advances, we can now link climate change to specific extreme weather disasters, and we have a better understanding of how the feedback loops in the climate system can make warming even worse. We can also now more confidently forecast catastrophic outcomes if global emissions continue on their current trajectory.

But to me, the most surprising new finding in the Fifth National Climate Assessment is this: There has been genuine progress, too.

I’m used to mind-boggling numbers, and there are many of them in this report. Human beings have put about 1.6 trillion tons of carbon in the atmosphere since the Industrial Revolution — more than the weight of every living thing on Earth combined. But as we wrote the report, I learned other, even more mind-boggling numbers. In the last decade, the cost of wind energy has declined by 70 percent and solar has declined 90 percent. Renewables now make up 80 percent of new electricity generation capacity. Our country’s greenhouse gas emissions are falling, even as our G.D.P. and population grow.

In the report, we were tasked with projecting future climate change. We showed what the United States would look like if the world warms by 2 degrees Celsius. It wasn’t a pretty picture: more heat waves, more uncomfortably hot nights, more downpours, more droughts. If greenhouse emissions continue to rise, we could reach that point in the next couple of decades. If they fall a little, maybe we can stave it off until the middle of the century. But our findings also offered a glimmer of hope: If emissions fall dramatically, as the report suggested they could, we may never reach 2 degrees Celsius at all.

For the first time in my career, I felt something strange: optimism.

And that simple realization was enough to convince me that releasing yet another climate report was worthwhile.

Something has changed in the United States, and not just the climate. State, local and tribal governments all around the country have begun to take action. Some politicians now actually campaign on climate change, instead of ignoring or lying about it. Congress passed federal climate legislation — something I’d long regarded as impossible — in 2022 as we turned in the first draft.

[Note: She's talking about the Inflation Reduction Act and the Infrastructure Act, which despite the names were the two biggest climate packages passed in US history. And their passage in mid 2022 was a big turning point: that's when, for the first time in decades, a lot of scientists started looking at the numbers - esp the ones that would come from the IRA's funding - and said "Wait, holy shit, we have an actual chance."]

And while the report stresses the urgency of limiting warming to prevent terrible risks, it has a new message, too: We can do this. We now know how to make the dramatic emissions cuts we’d need to limit warming, and it’s very possible to do this in a way that’s sustainable, healthy and fair.

The conversation has moved on, and the role of scientists has changed. We’re not just warning of danger anymore. We’re showing the way to safety.

I was wrong about those previous reports: They did matter, after all. While climate scientists were warning the world of disaster, a small army of scientists, engineers, policymakers and others were getting to work. These first responders have helped move us toward our climate goals. Our warnings did their job.

To limit global warming, we need many more people to get on board... We need to reach those who haven’t yet been moved by our warnings. I’m not talking about the fossil fuel industry here; nor do I particularly care about winning over the small but noisy group of committed climate deniers. But I believe we can reach the many people whose eyes glaze over when they hear yet another dire warning or see another report like the one we just published.

The reason is that now, we have a better story to tell. The evidence is clear: Responding to climate change will not only create a better world for our children and grandchildren, but it will also make the world better for us right now.

Eliminating the sources of greenhouse gas emissions will make our air and water cleaner, our economy stronger and our quality of life better. It could save hundreds of thousands or even millions of lives across the country through air quality benefits alone. Using land more wisely can both limit climate change and protect biodiversity. Climate change most strongly affects communities that get a raw deal in our society: people with low incomes, people of color, children and the elderly. And climate action can be an opportunity to redress legacies of racism, neglect and injustice.

I could still tell you scary stories about a future ravaged by climate change, and they’d be true, at least on the trajectory we’re currently on. But it’s also true that we have a once-in-human-history chance not only to prevent the worst effects but also to make the world better right now. It would be a shame to squander this opportunity. So I don’t just want to talk about the problems anymore. I want to talk about the solutions. Consider this your last warning from me."

-via New York Times. Opinion essay by leading climate scientist Kate Marvel. November 18, 2023.

[lordgrimoire]

So, an Idea, or AU I had regarding the good ol DPxDC.

I’m not sure what sort of disaster Amity’s ghost problem would be classified as, but think of what would happen if the local EMS (Emergency Services like Fire Departments, Law Enforcement, Emergency Medical, etc.) pretty much started jumping over the Mayor from the get-go? What if hard proof of these hijinx, for a brief time, were able to get out of Amity?

Well the Governor would probably have someone take a look, and once nonsense is confirmed (especially of its weird nonsense that looks a little to close to supers) they send in the National Guard, at first to keep an eye on the situation.

Then comes the Ghost Investigation Ward, and things go from moderately worrying to “WTF” real quick. And things start looking less Small Town USA and more Stalins Town USSR, at the height of Stalins Purges.

Admittedly it’s not immediate, and during the time between being put on “Indefinite Alert” and actually being relived this unit (I’m thinking a Battalion Sized force so about 1,200 soldiers/guardsmen total) ends up befriending the locals, and much to the Mayor, and GIWs, frustration, Phantom, as well as Red Huntress.

This leads to a standoff, the GIW can really only do what they want because of the Governments permission for them to do so, but engaging National Guard, who had not been federalized, may cause an issue or two. So they bring up the issue with someone who they think will back them up, their new boss Lex Luthor.

Now Lex isn’t a fool, but he figures out how the Justice League isn’t being called is due to a jammer the GIW set up and figures he can take a look around incognito like, or more accurately get trusted members of The Goonion, who he had Federally given approval to, to go take a look around.

When Alex gets the full story, and not just the GIWs original story but also updated info from the Doctors Fenton, who are now VERY worried, because they were wrong about Ghosts in more ways than they originally thought they may have been. Suffice to say, when Lex manages to get a copy of "The History of The Infinite Realms" and finds that Krypton's Afterlife is GONE, as in they did something similar to what the GIW is planning, he starts hitting the "Abort" Button with fury. Only to be told "Too late we're underway, we're going through a tunnel, what? What?" And now Lex decides Enough is Enough. Lex does two things, first he sends the GO order for the National Guard Battalion in Amity Park, then he starts trying to get a hold of the Justice League because "Listen I know you dislike me but I am willing to drop it all if you HELP WITH THIS BS THAT I JUST INHERITED!" Meanwhile back in Amity Things go from 0 to 100 faster than an Flash, that being the National Guard heard "GO" and immediatly started blasting. The Townfolks: Confused The Ghosts: Confused Team Phantom: Confused and Afraid The Ghost Hunters who are now studying Ghost Culture and the like: Very Confused and sorta getting Arrested. The GIW: Full of Bullet Holes, Screaming, and On Fire Meanwhile, The National Guard are waiting around two hours later with Phantom for any "Federal" News to come through: So the New President decided the Anti-Ecto Acts are BS, unfortunately they haven't been overturned yet so we're all most likely going to be marked as traitors. Mind if we hide out somewhere our bosses can't find us? Also the Justice League never actually knew any of the BS we've been going through, GIW Had some Jammer set up.

Phantom, Tired of all the damage and killing the GIW has caused in Amity Park: I'll try, but I'm not sure how much good it will do if the League shows up.

TLDR: Amity Park during it's entire run has a Battalion of US National Guard camped out in the outskirts/abandoned parts of town and they figure out most of the situation regarding Phantom not being the Villain Mayor Masters and the GIW Claim him to be. Following this logic they turned around and at the first opportunity attacked the GIW and pushed them out of Amity Park.

[reiderwriter]

You'd Be Like Heaven To Touch♣️

Pairing: Spencer Reid X Female Reader

Word count: 2.2k

Summary: After a whirlwind weekend, you're finally ready to go home and deal with the mess you created in Vegas. But you just cannot get your new Husband out of your head.

Warnings: Oral sex (F receiving), fingering, vaginal sex, no mention of birth control, and you're going to hate me by the end of this sex scene bye

A/N: They're officially out of Vegas! I'm so excited to share the next few parts with you guys, and we finally got our first taste of smut!! Also, the Reid in the gif is the exact one I'm picturing in this scene so yeah 🤡 smirk and all 😏

Here's the series masterlist, and my general masterlist!~

Prev. Chapter // Next Chapter

The race back to the hotel was easy compared to the ensuing rush to pack up an entire hotel room's worth of mess in the time between their arrival and their check-out time. Sure, they’d had to pack light as travelling FBI agents, but with the added mess you’d created in Spencer’s room, and the additional luggage of their marriage licence, the packing was needlessly more frantic than usual. 

When you finally did make it down to the lobby, you froze up a little, realising that you were the final one to exit your room. You watched as seven pairs of eyes shifted to you as soon as the elevator door opened, hauling your go-bag further up your arm from where it was slipping down. You thanked your past self for having the foresight to put some makeup into the bag, having used up a copious amount of your concealer to cover up any evidence of your night with Reid. You still kept a small distance from the others, just in case.

“Sorry, were you all waiting for me?” you smiled at them as you got closer, hoping that they’d not ask questions at what had taken you so long. Your eyes caught Reid’s and you could see that he was looking down at your neck. 

After an entire day morning and night in your company, you knew he’d seen the results of his handiwork. You wondered if the look that raked over you now was that of the dominant Reid from the night before, who you presumed marked you in such prominent places so people would know you were his, or that of the concerned team mate, who didn’t want to be caught and questioned by the others. You tried to shake both images from your head, not sure which would please you more. 

“It’s okay, you’re not late, the cars are being bought around now and the jet leaves in 30,” Hotch greeted you when you finally got close enough. 

“Late night, mama?” Morgan laughed at you as soon as he turned to you. “How did all that drinking last night go for you?” 

You were so wrapped up in Reid and what he may or may not be thinking that you had to pull yourself back to reality for a second to realise that Morgan had been talking to you. 

“What? Oh yeah, I guess. I don’t think I drank too much, but I did sleep like a baby, so who knows.” You laughed a little to punctuate the point, and then watched Morgan’s reaction closely. You were still looking for the two “agents” who had been witness to your marriage, after all. 

“Ooh, you didn’t sample the local goods last night then? I’ve heard that Downtown Las Vegas is the best place to meet single men, and you were just complaining that you hadn’t been out in a while,” Penelope said from beside the man. 

“No, no, the place Reid took me to was more library than bar, and as far from Downtown as you could get, so it was a nice and easy night for me.” 

“And if the local men are anything like our resident Las Vegan,” Emily jumped in, looking at Reid. “Then I’m sure they’re not really what Y/N is looking for.” She laughed and they all start making their way out of the lobby. 

You try to avoid meeting Reid’s eyes after that last comment, sure that you wouldn’t be able to stop the grimace of apology from coming to your lips. But you couldn’t help yourself, and you forced your eyes up into a small peak at his face, only to see his downturned eyes and the small smirk that was crossing his lips. 

You hung back for a second, needing to clue this out, and nudged him with your elbow. 

“What’s that look for?” you whisper at him in a harsh tone, hoping that no one was watching the two of you. 

“It’s nothing.” He says, but the smile stays on his lips. You give him another look, silently communicating that you’re not taking that first answer and he nods a little as he walks beside you. 

“If they could see the marks on your neck, they wouldn’t be thinking that I’m not what you’re looking for, right?” You could feel the heat in your cheeks, and you playfully whacked him in the arm a bit, before pushing through the doors of the hotel and feeling the sun on your cheeks once again. 

You watched him climb into the car you took earlier and stop yourself from following him. You were going to need some time to think about how you should take that last comment, and a half an hour drive outside of his presence would probably do you good. Climbing up into the other SUV, you take a deep breath, feeling all the restlessness of the night before creep up on you.

–X–

You don’t know where you are, but you know that you’re burning up under his touch. His lips are on your skin, working their way down from your neck to the valley between your breasts and all you can hear is the sound of your own lustful moans as his hands trail further still. 

You don’t know who it is on top of you, but you know that you’re dying for him to be there, to push his tongue into your mouth and make you submit to his will. His fingers wrap around the waistband of your panties and roughly pull them down, opening you up to him. You feel his lips ghost down further still, until he’s there between your legs. 

“Is this where you wanted me, baby? So desperate to have me, my little slut.” His words send another shiver down your spine as you roll your hips up into his face again. 

He lets out a small chuckle and gives you what you want, finally lowering his tongue again and letting it meet your desperate cunt. He sets his attention on your clit, and your eyes roll back in bliss, not caring who it is between your legs giving you this much pleasure, just desperate for them to keep going. 

“Don’t stop, please, don’t stop,” you beg, fisting a handful of your mystery man’s hair. It’s soft to the touch, a little curly at the ends and it feels familiar, but you’re unable to think about it for more than a second before he’s pushing a finger into you. 

“That’s it baby. Look at you, so fucking tight around my finger. You want me to push my cock into you, you’re going to have to relax for me baby, okay?” You still don’t know who it is, but you nod for him, knowing you want nothing except everything he’s telling you that you want. 

He’s thrusting his fingers into you at a relentless pace now, adding one digit every few thrusts, until he’s up to three. His face is still buried in your pussy, tongue still flicking against your clit, his other hand pushing you down by the hips as he forces you closer and closer to the edge. 

His hand drops down to your thigh, pushing your legs further apart, and it stays there feeling overly warm, almost burning you up from just that simple touch. 

“You’re so wet for me baby, going to take my cock now?” You whimper and nod your head as fervently as you can, begging him with your eyes to push into you. He finally pulls his head up to your own, and you’re finally face-to-face with your mystery man. 

“So wet for me, right baby? So wet for your husband?” Spencer questions you as he pushes into your wet, dripping hole, and you’re so surprised that all you can do in response is moan. 

With each thrust, he drops a moan into your ears, and you feel your climax building quickly. 

“Ah fuck yes, Y/N,” you claw at his back, desperate to pull him closer. 

“Spencer, don’t stop, fuck.” Your name begins dropping from his lips like a prayer as his thrusts get sloppier, wetter, deeper. 

“Y/N… Y/N……… Y/N….” 

–X– 

“Y/N, are you finally awake? We’ve been calling your name for a minute now.” Your eyes snap open and you come face to face with Emily and JJ from the seats opposite you on the jet. 

“We thought you might be having a nightmare. Want to talk about it?” JJ asks, her voice in a hushed tone as a look of sympathy crosses over her face. 

Whatever that was, it certainly was not a nightmare. But the scenario you were in now certainly was. 

“What? Oh, yeah. I don’t know, maybe it was a nightmare.” You desperately hope you sound convincing enough for them to drop the subject. The last time you’d mentioned a lack of sleep, half of the team had approached you with different home remedies and tips for getting your full 8 hours. The last thing you needed right now was the constant reminder that you’d just had a sex dream about Spencer Reid on the jet whilst surrounded by all your close friends and colleagues. 

Including the man himself, you realised, as you stretched your neck out from its awkward sleep position, and caught the sight of him there next to you. Your car had reached the jet first earlier that day, and it had taken all of two minutes after boarding before you’d been claimed by sleep, so you hadn’t realised he’d positioned himself next to you. 

A quick glance down had told you he’d done more than that. Wrapped around your legs, and so big that it stretched over his too, was a large blanket, the one that he usually used on your longer trips home. He was asleep in the seat next to you, you noticed after an embarrassing amount of time, head resting in one of his hands, lips slightly open, looking the image of tranquillity. 

His other hand was beneath the blanket, somewhere you couldn’t see, but as you shifted slightly in your chair trying to get comfortable again, you realised it was definitely somewhere you could feel. His hand had somehow fallen into your lap, and he had a firm but sleepy grip on your left thigh, the one closest to him. Now that you had moved, so did his hand, rubbing gentle strokes into your skin every few minutes. Slow enough that you were sure he was still asleep, but still enough to have am effect.

His hand was hot against your leg, and his touch burned. You remembered the sensation from your dream and immediately did your best to temper your facial expressions, not wanting to gather any more concern from the two women opposite you at the table than you already had. 

“Y/N? If you want to talk about it, we’re always here you know? This job can be overwhelming at the best of times, and we just worked a hard case. No one would blame you for needing to take some time for yourself.” Emily looked at you in concern now, and it was taking all of your will to keep your eyes on her, and nod at the appropriate time, your brain short-circuiting now that you realised Reid was so close. 

Where did this sudden infatuation with him come from? You’d always appreciated that he was a good looking guy, but you’d never thought about him so thoroughly before, and certainly not enough to lose yourself on the jet to inappropriate thoughts. 

It was the insanity of the weekend, you told yourself, it had to be. You’d learnt more about him and accidentally, possibly, maybe slept together, and now your body was just getting it out of your system. Either that or you’d just learnt too much about his preferences and your brain was just trying to come to terms with each revelation. 

You settled back into comfortable conversation with Emily and JJ, trying your best to convince yourself that your dream had meant nothing, blocking out any noise in your head that was suggesting otherwise. 

Especially the little thought at the back of your brain that was reminding you that you hadn’t removed his hand from your thigh, and that you really didn’t want to. 

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[giuliettagaltieri]

A Hundred Sleepless Nights

Pairing: Husband!Coriolanus Snow x Wife!Reader

Chapter Synopsis: The Beloved

Warning: perversion, explicit smut, unprotected sex, sexual euphoria

Word Count: 3988

5 of 7

Coriolanus thinks he might have made a mistake in choosing your honeymoon destination.

Mrs. Plinth apparently owns a private beach down in the south. She insisted that you spend your honeymoon there as it was more private.

Private.

A scowl made it to Coriolanus’ face the moment you arrived in the secluded beach town. He was still in his suit and you were still in your wedding dress.  Anybody with eyes can see that you were just married.  But the locals knew no shame.

The men, their skin bronze from being on the coast, fit from constantly moving, their faces sculpted manliness. And they seem to have taken a liking to you.

“May I help you with that, Miss?” A man asks you for the third time that night, referring to the handbag you carried. It has your personal effects, you would not trust anyone with it.

“That would not be necessary.” Coriolanus quips, his arm circling around your waist.  The man straightens up and looks Coriolanus up and down before he grins

“Her other baggage, then? You won’t be able to carry them all.”

Coriolanus scoffs and you politely smile at the man. You know Coriolanus is more than capable of lifting baggage but there is too much of it, it seems unreasonable to make your husband carry them all.

“Oh, we have more than enough help. Thank you.” You say sweetly and as if on cue, peacekeepers and porters appear to start putting your bags in the yacht.

The man frowns, his mind whirring before he comes to a realization.

“You’re those politicians who just got married.”

Coriolanus looks at him, his eyes now sharp.

“Does the Capitol news not reach this part of Panem?” He raises a brow.

The man chuckles as he rubs his stubble. “Nah, just don’t watch any of that bullshit.”

“You watch your words very carefully.” Coriolanus grins, the iciness in his tone not matching his charming face. “The Capitol is not very kind to those who call our affairs ‘bullshit’.”

You look at the man with much fascination. You have to commend how he stands his ground, now sizing Coriolanus up, but his lax posture was breaking apart on the surface. Ignorance really has a feeble power to it.

Despite the burliness of this person, you are not too worried about Coriolanus as he had his fair share of training. And the peacekeepers are just waiting for the man to cross that fine intangible line, their postures tight and ready to spring.

“Now, if you’ll excuse us. My wife and I have other places to be.”  Coriolanus leads you to the yacht where your luggage has been placed.

“The impudence of some people.”  Coriolanus spits.  “He does not even recognize the President.”

“I will talk to the mayor.” You attempt to soothe him but he clicks his tongue.

His jaw tightens before he takes a deep breath. “We agreed not to work while we are on our honeymoon.” He says but you can see how excruciating it was for him to say.

You grimace before breaking to a smile.

“If you say so, my love.”

You glance behind you and see the man still staring at you. You turn away when he sends you a boyish smile and a wink.

Coriolanus grunts when you cling to his arm tightly.

“Hurry, Corio.”

He straightens his back and slows his pace. “I see no purpose in rushing.” He’s not running away from anything.

It makes you roll your eyes but you match his pace anyways.  You enjoy the night stroll, the cool breeze refreshing your skin that is trapped in your wedding gown. You wanted to get out of it the moment the reception ended but Grandma’am almost dropped her turban when you mentioned a change of clothing.

Perhaps it was an old Panem tradition but she said only the groom must free you of your bridal gown.

Again with the superstitions but Coriolanus and you both decided you’d listen. A way to apologize after that stunt you pulled in the middle of the reception.  Coriolanus tightens his hold around your waist as you board the yacht.

“I’m hungry.” You tell him. 

He nods. “So am I.”

With the pressure of the ceremony and reception, you did not get to enjoy the food served despite them being of the finest qualities.

“I’d love to have that filet mignon again.”  You sigh as you sit on a sofa.  Coriolanus watches you with a smile.  Your face was full of disappointment and you looked adorable as your poofy gown swallowed you. “And posca.”

“Mhh, agreed.”  He sauntered over to the glass windows. Watching how the hydrofoil cuts the waters below.  The ruffling from your gown makes Corio turn to look at you once more.

You have occupied the entire sofa, now lying on your back as you stared into the tall ceiling. Your eyes have glazed over and he can see how your fingers picked at your gown.

“Tell me what you are thinking.”

Sighing, you close your eyes. He’s always so commanding.

“Nothing.”

He walks over to sit on the armrest. You look up to meet his glacial eyes with your own.

“There is definitely something in there, wife.”

Wife

You bite your bottom lip to contain your smile. Coriolanus raises a brow, his lips quirked up.

“Wife?”

You giggle as you reach up to pinch him but he easily swats your hand away.

“Are you regressing to your teenage self?” He pulls you up and slots himself under you so you are sitting on his lap.

“No.” You answer quickly. Too quickly.

You play with your ring as he watches you, still waiting for you to talk.

“I will hold you the entire night if you refuse to tell me.”

You shrug.  “I’m comfortable.”  His nimble fingers slip to your waist and your breath hitches.

“Yeah?”

You nod hastily.

“Tell me what is going on in that head of yours.”  He whispers against the shell of your ear, sending a shiver to crawl up your spine.

“Corio!”

“Yes?” He flashes you that charming smile again.

“Stop it.” You say, your cheeks are now bubbling.

He tilts his head to the side.  He is fooling nobody with this pretense.

You try to get off but he keeps you in place with a hand.  He is looking around the room now, acting nonchalant to your struggle.  He looks at you with his face passive and you eventually settle.

“Stop making me flustered.”  You raise a finger at him and he grins lazily at you.  The glint of those rather sharp looking canines had you retreating your finger back.

He sets a steady bounce of his leg, jostling you and you click your tongue at him.  “What are you doing?” You grab at his coat to steady yourself.

“Trying to calm your tantrum.”

“I am not a child.” 

His eyes return to the carpeted floor and now just leans back on the sofa.  “I can see that.” You ignore how his eyes roam to your bosom.

“If you must really know, I was thinking of having a new signature.”

A perfect blonde brow was raised. “Signature.”

“I want to keep my maiden name in it but I also wanted to add yours.”

“Ours.”

“Ours.” You echo as you smile at him meekly.

“You are a Snow now.” He reminds you sternly and your cheeks warm up as you nod.

“I know that, Corio.”  You shift in his lap and he rubs your waist.

The air shifts, making it difficult for you to keep still. 

A knock pulls your attention to the door.

“Mister and Missus Snow, we have arrived.”

Coriolanus looks at you and raises both brows briefly as if making a point.

You roll your eyes and get off, he lets you this time.

The private beach.  Well, more like a private island.  It was like how every beach shown in brochures is.

The staff is already waiting by the docks, standing tall and in uniformed clothing.

“Don’t worry, Missus Snow.  The staff will be here only until seven in the evening.”  The head butler tells you as he escorts you and your husband off the yacht.

“The security?”  Coriolanus looks around the island, taking in every face that was present.

The butler nods, a proud smile on his lips.

“Stationed just in this dock and on the ocean.”

You would love to have privacy but not if it meant compromising you and your husband’s safety.

“Peacekeepers are also stationed on the coast.”  The head butler reassures you.  “This island is also being covered by the most recent security offered by District 3.  We have sonars covering the waters.  There is no need to be uneasy.”

It was these kinds of over the top operations that reminds you that it is the President you have married.  His security can easily topple the peace that the retired President Ravinstill tried so hard to maintain.

“The staff will come to prepare your meals and leave after the dishes are cleaned up.  The day after tomorrow, the cleaning crew will take care of the linens and your laundry.”  The staff bows at you as you pass by them.  “Should you need something else.  We are a call away.  We are stationed in the ocean to respond right away to your every need.”

You share a look with Coriolanus.  It was a bit overkill, you both can agree.  But nothing less for the Presidential couple.

“Food is being prepared right at this moment.”  The head butler continues.

The villa is nice and airy.  Spacious and a perfect place to relax in.  And the smell of food, oh it is divine.

“The gods heard you.”  Coriolanus jests and you scan the table to see a glistening filet mignon.  Coriolanus pulls a chair for you and you thank him.  The head butler pours you a glass of posca and you smile gratefully.

Coriolanus and you eat your dinner quietly.  Giving compliments to the chefs who are standing in anticipation behind you.  You are generous in your praise, just to help in easing their anxiety.

You bid them goodbye as they all board a boat to take their leave.

When they are a considerable distance away, you and Coriolanus are able to drop the pretense. 

“Ugh.”  You groan as you grip your gown up to head inside the villa.  “I refuse to see anybody for twenty-four hours straight.”

Coriolanus follows after you, his hands clasped behind his back in a relaxed manner.  “Does that include me?”

You look at him briefly.  “What a stupid question.”  You link your arms to his and he glances at the clam expression on your face.

Now that he is standing so close, he notices just how much your childhood features remained in your face.  Your eyes and lips stayed the same.

“There was this one time I found you under the tables during a banquet held by our fathers.”  Coriolanus tells you and you don’t look up to him.  “I accidentally kicked you.”

You only hum to acknowledge him.

“I slipped under the tablecloth and joined you.”  He recalls.  “And you stole my first kiss.”

“Corio, stop talking.”  You groan.

“You told me you will be my wife.”

You purse your lips, not knowing how to respond.  

Sighing, you finally say,  “You were distraught.”  

“I was five.”

“In the Academy.  You hated me.”

“I envied you.”

Coriolanus opens the door and lets you pass first.  You continue to walk until you find the bedroom and he follows suit.

“Is that why you preferred Clemensia Dovecote’s company?”  You say sharply and Coriolanus looks at you as he leans on the vanity to undo his coat.

“She was pretty.  A nice accessory.”

You walk over to him, throwing your arms on his shoulders as you look deeply into his eyes.

“You think she’s pretty?”

He shakes his head.  “Not anymore.  She’s more of a snake than a dove now.”

“But you thought she was pretty.”

Coriolanus places a hand on your waist to steady you.

“That was because I did not want to admit my attraction to you.”

You pull away, doe eyes looking up at him meekly as your brows raise hopefully.  “You were attracted to me?”

“I am attracted to you.  How could I not be when everything about you tells the entire Capitol that you are mine?”

With utmost shyness, you focus your attention on his tie, not quite able to meet his eyes.  “You didn’t care.”

“The rosettes you used to wear in your hair were pretty.”  He smiles as he tucks your hair to the side.  “And so were the rosette patterns on the lace of your panties.”

Your movements have gone still.  Your eyes wide as you feel like a bucket of ice was dumped on your head.  Your eyes are frantic as you look up at him.  His face was passive, not betraying him.

“You think you were sneaky?”  He taunts as he starts to pull at your dress.  “You thought I would not know about your naughty little secrets?”

You gasp when he rips a stitch of your dress as he tugs it.

“Corio.”  You say breathlessly.  “How did you-”

“That initiation we had in our first year.”  He says gruffly as he pulls your gown once more until your breasts come spilling out.  “You were to exit the academy with just your skirts and blouse.”

Your face flushes.  “Y-you saw?”

“Everybody did.”  He tells you and you bury your face in his chest.  “It worked in my favor.  No boys came after you in the Academy.”

You cursed the wind that day.

Coriolanus pulls your gown and his fingers hook on the dainty fabric that cupped your innocence.

You place your hands on his shoulders as he tugs them down.  You cover your face as he gets the fabric off.

“Oh, will you look at that?”  He chuckles as he examines the lacy fabric.  “Still adorned with rosettes.”  He twists the fabric in his long fingers and you swallow as your throat has gone dried up at the sight.  You grab his arm when he brings it up his nose.  He looks at you sternly.  “Smells like roses too and feminine musk.”

You have had enough.  After securing your gown, you turn your back to him and head to the closet, muttering angrily but he chases after you and pulls you to the lounge instead.

“You are a…a sick man!”  You say angrily as you pull away.

“If I am sick, then so are you for liking it.”  He laughs as he finishes his work with your gown until your torso is bare but he never quite got it off you just yet.  “Come here, my love.”  He sits on a plush chair and beckons you by patting his thighs.

You attempt to sit sideways but he clicks his tongue and with much reluctance, you straddle him instead.

He keeps his eyes on you as he holds your hips, his fingers digging in the large poof of your gown.

“You look so bridal.”  He says.  “I’d want nothing else but to ruin you while you still have the dress on.”  Coriolanus noses your cheek. 

“You’d let me, won’t you?”  He asks in a deeper voice, making you nod your head with your eyes closed and lip caught between your teeth.

He chuckles at your startled gasp as he prodded at your petals.  His fingers spread to your lips, creating a wet noise that had you wrapping your arms around his neck once more as you hid away.

“She’s wet.” 

You buck your hips against his when his thumb presses flat on your pearl.

“You like it?”  He smiles against your hair and you hum.  “Words, darling.”

“I do, Corio.”  You murmur against his chest.  “More please.” 

He swallows thickly as he lets a finger slip between your folds and he winces lightly when you bite his shoulder.  His finger was met with resistance but he pushed it further, willing you to relax.

“There you go.”  He says as you start to grind against his hand.  You throw your head back as your hands grip his shoulders.

“Mmh!”  You mewl, your eyebrows pinched as hot puffs of air escape your lips that have bloated after being nibbled.  “F-feels sooo good!”

Coriolanus watches your face as you move above him, his fingers dripping with your sweet honey.

The thickness of his fingers nudged at your quivering walls, it had soft sighs spilling from your lips.  He curls his fingers upward and you melt as it massages the sweet spot inside you.

You suddenly gasp, bowing your head as your hands grasp at his hair.  “C-Corio…I’m-…Oh!”

Your body seizes up as you pull him close, your walls pulsating around his fingers as you cum.  Your honey stains your thighs and he revels at the look on your face.

Coriolanus carries you to your bed as he dips his head to kiss you.  You are mewling his name through the kiss as his fingers keep massaging your walls.  He gently slips his fingers out of you, the sensation most frustrating.

He slips out of his coat and you admire him for a while before trying to tug your gown off but he glares at you and your hands retreat from doing it.  The gown is soon tugged from you and you find yourself covering your feminine parts as his eyes roam around your body. 

Warm rough hands cup under your knee to part your legs further.  You whine in embarrassment and you make an attempt to pull your knees together.  Still so shy from him seeing your body.

“Don’t.”  He warns and your bones turn weak, you feel shameful with how much your body responds to him.

“I’m sorry.”  You say meekly.

Both of you are thrumming in anticipation as he unbuckles his pants and you wait with bated breath as he frees himself.

Coriolanus grunts as he grips his cock, pumping until you feel a warm dribble land on your stomach.

You watch his face contort with concentration as he guides his leaking tip on your entrance and you bite back a moan as the tip catches, the head slotting itself between your petals.

“If you hold back on your sounds, I would get upset.”  He says pointedly and you nod at him, your hand running on his arm to soothe him and to get him to hurry.

Coriolanus hooks your legs over his arms, he holds your waist as he slips himself inside you.

Your pained gasp had him gritting his teeth. 

“Just a bit more, darling.”

But that was a lie.  He was barely in.

Your nails are biting at his arms, forming red angry crescent moons.

“Almost there.”  He groans and you let out a choked sob, feeling the burn from the tight stretch.

Coriolanus inhales sharply as your tightness keeps him from filling you.  He places your legs back on the mattress and he clicks his tongue at how your walls reject his size.  He glances at your face before he tongues his cheek.

“I’m sorry, my love.” 

You don’t get to ask why when he crawls on top of you, his corded arms slipping under you so he can grip your shoulders.  He pulls back slightly and your juices, now painted pink with the mixture of your broken innocence, slips to coat your inner thighs.

Coriolanus murmurs apologies on your hair and makes shallow thrusts, your hands gripping his nape with the conflict of pleasure and pain, making you wetter and wetter.  And in one full thrust, he sheaths himself.

Your eyes shot open as you clawed on his back, feeling yourself tipping before you came crashing down.  Your flower clenches as it pulses around him, your slick overflowing with his tip kissing your cervix.

You are making noises that Coriolanus never thought you were capable of.  Your words were more of like babbles as wet sobs spilled from your lips.

The sight of you, so debauched, makes Coriolanus laugh.  “You come from just being stuffed full?”

Your glare up at him but your tongue is still unable to form words as pleasure makes tears leak from your eyes.

“Yeah, feels good, doesn’t it?”  He chuckles while he rocks his hips against yours.

He watches with amusement at how you throw your head back when he pounds on you.  He can see your pulse jumping and he wonders if you know how vulnerable you are right now.  He grazes his teeth on the thinness of your skin and to his surprise, you mewl wantonly, only tightening around him.

“Naughty girl.”  He chuckles but you look at him, offended.

“I’m not.”

He kisses your pouting lips.  “Hm?”

You shake your head.  “I’m not.”

“You’re not naughty?”  He snickers and you nod.  You are acting no different to a drunk.  “That’s right.  You’ve been a good girl, haven’t you?”

Coriolanus wonders if the look you are giving him are what they say heart eyes are.  

He realized that he feels most powerful when he is on top of you and making you feel good. 

Your feet absentmindedly slide to caress his leg and he smiles at your adorable display of affection.

Nobody would believe the sight of you right now.

So docile, so submissive.

The damp fabric under you was uncomfortable and it was too warm, but such tiny discomforts flew over your head when Coriolanus was making you feel too good.

Your big teary eyes look at him as your brows curl in pleasure, you were too adorable he had to kiss you.

You break the kiss with a whine, your heels digging on the mattress as your back arches off the bed.

Coriolanus understood and fucked into you rougher, trying to keep a steady pace but it was getting harder and harder for him to do when your soft wet walls rub against his sensitive cock.

“Corio, Corio please!”  You beg him as your hands cupped his face in desperation.

He seethes through gritted teeth, his hands leaving a red print on your shoulders as he crushed you with his weight.  You were sobbing, just needing him all to yourself.

And you cum once more.  You are lost as every coil in your body snaps.  You are unraveling beneath him and Coriolanus grunts, chasing his own high and he slots the tip of his manhood deep inside you and spills his seed.

You wince at the warm spurts of his spend and you pull him to share another kiss.

Coriolanus breathed heavily against your lips.  He felt invincible yet ready to go down on his knees for you.  No wonder why so many empires collapsed for women.  He would gladly die if you asked him to at this moment.

Your sob pulls him from his thoughts and looks at you with concern.

Coriolanus tucks your damp hair to the side as he kisses your cheek.  “What’s wrong, sweetheart?  Did I go too rough?”

You shake your head as you pull him closer, your legs crossing over his posterior, burying him deeper inside you, making him groan, the tendons on his arms popping in an attempt to control himself.

“I love you.  I love you, Corio.  It felt so good.”

He chuckles at your words and he nods, dipping low to kiss your lips once more.  “I love you too.”  He looks deep into your eyes and starts moving his hips once more, determined to make love to you again.

You give him a tired smile but you encourage him by tracing his nape sensually with your manicured nails.

You share a look of pure fondness, so in love and lost in pleasure.

It was then you realized that you need nothing else but each other and you would do everything to protect this love you found.

Quest for Happiness

[withahappyrefrain]

⭐ 60 Fun Meet Cutes ⭐

1) A and B’s coffee orders are identical. Confusion (and promised calls) occur.

2) A always steals B’s parking spot and normally they wouldn't say anything but not today asshole!

3) A and B are seated next to each other at the singles table for a wedding.

4) B owns a bookshop and A really needs this book because their book club meeting is in two days.

5) A is a doctor/nurse treating B for an injury, but B won't stop flirting.

6) A pretends to be B’s significant other because they can tell that creep is bothering B.

7) They meet at the dog park and their dogs won't stop playing with one another.

8) They meet at the dog park and B’s dog won't stop following A’s!

9) They're both at a party and notice the other is sitting alone on the couch so we join.

10) They get volun-told to do a karaoke duet by their respective friend groups.

12) A and B’s families have been trying to set them up for years. They meet by accident.

13) A runs a stand at the local farmers market that B loves (the owner being cute and sweet is a major plus too).

14) They grab the same book at the library.

15) “You have the wrong number, but stay on!”

16) A and B have been set up on a blind date together. Neither one of them expect it to go well, given their mutual friend's track record.

17) A and B both want the last pack of cigarettes. It's not even for themselves, but they'll certainly argue about it.

18) "Hi, I'm pretty sure I saw you on a dating app and while I swiped right, you did not and wow you're beautiful in person."

19) A’s a tour guide for B, who is currently supervising a field trip of twenty seven year olds.

20) A is B’s least favorite author but they don't realize until halfway through their rant.

21) "Hey, my friend is into your friend. But they're too scared to make a move, can you help me get them together?"

22) They're at the grocery store and A can't reach the item on the top shelf, so B helps them.

23) “Hey, so I helped your grandparent cross the street and they insisted that I meet you, their grandchild.”

24) It's our high school reunion and I'm like eighty percent sure we were lab partners and you have no idea what I'm talking about.

25) A’s friends insisted on going to a strip club for a bachelor/bachelorette party and A is really enjoying their time talking to B, the hostess.

26) An unexpected torrential downpour happens and they end up taking shelter at the same place.

27) “I'm your neighbor and I swear to God, if you don't turn that music down-

28) They’re both PhD students and their dissertations contradict each other's and boy, are they going to have some intense eye contact about it.

29) B is A’s child's new teacher and their kid won't stop mentioning that their parent is single.

30 “I'm so sorry, but my friends won't stop bothering me until I get someone's number tonight, it doesn't have to be your real one, I'm just so tired of their shenanigans.”

31) A is the hot firefighter who visits B’s classroom to talk about safety.

32) A and B are paired up for a roller coaster and one of them needs to hold the other's hand to get through the ride.

33) “Look, your date may not want to dance with you, but I certainly will!”

34) They're both celebrities and their fans ship them so A and B do an interview together for our respective press tours.

35) They're both on the bus and A is reading the book B’s been wanting so badly and they gotta know if it's good or not because the waitlist at the library is ridiculous.

36) They're at an art museum and have wildly different interpretations of the same portrait.

37) It's been arranged by their families for A and B to marry as a peace treaty. When they meet for the first time, they see why their families fought so much!

38) "Do you mind if I sit here? There are no other seats available."

39) A doesn’t know why their friend's girlfriend invited me to their coworker's nephew's bar mitzvah but they have a stain from the chocolate fountain and B is an angel with their Tide to go stick.

40) “If you don't fix your collar/tie/hat, I will do it myself!”

41) “The food in your grocery store cart looks so good, what are you making?x

42) A sees B at the Renaissance Fair and is determined to give B a rose.

43) They're both at the eye doctor and can't figure out which glasses to buy.

44) They end up sitting next to each other in a movie theater during a horror movie, and cling to each other for moral support

45) A owns a flower shop andBl B just needs the courage to go inside and say hello.

46) B’s dog somehow got out and A find it. Yes, it's late at night but from B’s voice over the phone, A knows they need to return this dog STAT.

47) A has always signed up to bring the dessert for their work's potluck. Who does B think they are taking their slot?

48) A’s friends signed them up for a dating app and set them up on a date with B without A’s knowledge.

49) B’s running an adoption event and A doesn’t even like animals but my God, is B so damn cute with them.

50) They're spies who have to pretend to be a couple for an assignment.

51) They’re professors who teach the same course but disagree over teaching methods.

52) A is B’s friend's asshole boss and B is just trying to drop off C’s lunch without strangling A.

53) A’s a witch who run a shop. B barges in, asking about the best curse to give someone (without killing them of course).

54) A is a hairdresser at a fancy salon and B shouldn't be spending $150 on a haircut but they need to talk to A.

55) A is a personal trainer and B is their my client and A knows they need to keep it professional but it's really hard!

56) A is the photographer and B’s the caterer for the worst wedding ever.

57) It's the county Fair and A has lost their niece/nephew, so they ask B for help.

58) A is having a horrendous case of writer’s block, B works at the cafe A has been staying at for the past few days and is very concerned.

59) Hades and Persephone AU bc why not

60) A is a tattoo artist and it's B's first time getting a tattoo.

[skzms]

🌊 ೃ‧₊◜ sea may rise, sky may fall epilogue

pairing: lee know x f!reader x han jisung

summary: felix tells us about his life, the crew, the year han yujun was vanquished, and the year after that. about the crew, the captain, minho and jisung, and his own life

word count: 11.6k

warnings: homophobia; religious themes and trauma; one mention of suicial ideation and drinking as coping; references to prostitution (good and bad) and attempted assault (nothing too graphic); violence and murder, as always; ace!felix 🖤🩶🤍💜

author's note: and here we are <3 the official end of sea may rise, sky may fall. thank you thank you thank you again for all your love on this series, every single comment, message, DM. they all mean the world to me. my biggest project ever, my soul project, it means everything to me. so thank you for following along <3 and a very, very special thank you to @xenteaart for providing me a necessary second perspective on felix's story! also for her beautiful thoughts on Minho's kitties that I consider canon now oh and it's too long again hahahah I'm just a humble fanfic writer, let me write about them happy. love you all!

this series is 🔞, so minors, please DNI

series masterlist // skzms masterlist

< interlude - THE END

Hi, my name’s Lee Felix, and I’m part of a crew of privateers. Their cook, actually.

That’s how I would greet people if I ever met new people any more, but I rarely do. And if I do, our captain is usually the one who steps up, all confidence and sharp eyes, and does the talking for us. I don’t mind it, I’ve met enough people I wish I hadn’t for a lifetime. I’m happy with my crew, my friends.

Some of those friends of mine call me Yongbok. I’m not sure why. I mean, that’s also my name, but it was a random tidbit I told them once that I thought they would forget about; that whoever my mother was wrote the name on a piece of paper and attached it to the basket she abandoned me at the church gates in.

It’s not like I hate it, not at all. I don’t hate much any more. I used to hate a lot.

Though for the first few years of my life I didn’t. I was a happy child, obsessed with the flower garden behind the church in Nassau where I grew up, spending days and days outside, playing with the local kids, enjoying the attention of everyone who came to the church to talk to the vicar, who they told what a beautiful child I was, what a blessing from God I was.

I was happy because I thought I was loved. But when I turned 14, I realised that I wasn’t. That all I was for the vicar was a project. A project, a challenge sent by God, to turn the little godless, hopeless, bastard boy who was dropped on his doorstep into a devout follower who never asked any questions. But I wasn’t. Looking back, I knew I could never have been what he thought I needed to be. But the thing that tipped the scales against me was when I fell in love with the baker’s son when I was 14 and the vicar found him on his knees in front of me behind the tool shed.

He made me feel every single thing I was not with every crack of his palm across my face. The violence, his words – they all made me realise that, all this time, everything I had thought was fatherly affection was actually a maniacal striving to please a God that didn’t exist. I almost ended my life that night. But stubbornness kept me alive. Then and for the next years, when it felt like my fate was sealed.

Because I grew up all angles, except where it mattered. Big eyes and full lips. Lithe little body that everyone wanted. Blonde hair that I let grow out in an act of defiance until the vicar dragged me into his study and chopped it all off with his rusty scissors. But I just let it grow out again.

He finally threw me out when he caught a visiting pastor make eyes at me. Told me I was sent to him by satan. A succubus, a temptress, a vile being. He didn’t even let me get my things, chased me out of his house in the middle of the night. I ran until I couldn’t any more. I slept in the woods that night, shivering and hungry, but by the time morning came, I knew I was going to do whatever I had to do to survive.

That’s how I ended up at the Crimson Pearl. And really, in the beginning it wasn’t so bad. I knew people wanted me, saw my body as something desirable, and sex never meant much to me, anyway.

The working conditions and the pay weren’t bad, and when I figured out which clients would tip well and which should be avoided, I settled into a fine life there. I even found some friends amongst the other prostitutes, as much as it was possible when every day was a fight for survival. But most importantly, I had independence, a roof over my head and a warm meal every day, and I was far, far away from my vicious adopted father. Though I saw him once. At the brothel, slipping into the room with one of the other boys. I drank myself to sleep that night.

But then the owner of the Crimson Pearl was murdered in his home one night, and his successor was a drunk monster. He would come in late, when the sun had already long set, half drunk, ignoring our complaints of dirty sheets and lack of soap. He would get progressively drunker throughout the night until all he did was sit and complain and ��sample the wares” to “ensure the quality of the merchandise” as he called it – as he slept with any of us that he wanted, as roughly and meanly as he wanted. Charging patrons for our services became less and less of a priority the later it got, especially when late at night, his friends came in, and he happily invited them to pick whichever one of us to have their way with, ruthlessly, mercilessly – and without paying, of course.

And mostly, we were able to stick together, get the worst patrons out, protect each other, but then the new owner realised what we were doing, and he became very angry. From then on, none of us were allowed to help each other any more. We were forced to sit there, to listen, and if any of us moved, he would hurt us. It was torture.

I somehow managed to avoid being picked by the worst of them for weeks, until I couldn’t, when one of his buddies locked eyes with me and the owner ordered me to take him to my room. I knew that this would be change everything - if I managed to survive. I was terrified, but God, did I put up a fight. But he was too strong. He hurt me and I panicked and I screamed, screamed for someone, anyone, even though I knew none of my friends would help, could help, and I prayed, prayed to the God I didn’t believe in any more to do something, anything–

And then the door flew open, and the captain rushed in like a vengeful angel, dragged the man off me as if he didn’t weigh a thing, shoved him into the wall so hard the whole house rattled. Someone dragged him out, took him away, but all I could see was the captain. She approached me carefully, dressed me quickly, but gently, wrapped me in her coat and led me outside.

Later, they told me it was Minho who had pinned the man to the wall before dragging him outside. Changbin, who held the owner at gunpoint while the others went through the other rooms. They gutted the Crimson Pearl, divided the scant takings between the other working boys and girls so they could run, put up somewhere for a while, while they found new jobs. They killed the owner and all of his friends who had been tormenting us for years in the alley behind the brothel, leaving them in the dirt to die. I felt sick with hatred and satisfaction and gratitude.

But I didn’t notice any of that at the time. I was dazed and in pain, shivering, the captain’s coat only helping so much in the cold breeze. And I remember the captain’s eyes, the kindest ones I’d ever seen, asking me all kinds of questions, like if I was okay, if I could walk, if I needed a doctor, if I had anywhere to go. I did my best to answer her through the shivers and the tears and the captain took one long look at me before she asked me the question that would change my life.

“Do you want to join us, Felix? Or at least stay with us for then night? We will keep you safe.”

And that’s all it took, then, for me to say yes. But to be honest, I would’ve said yes to anyone in that moment, if it meant escaping the hopelessness of my life.

To her credit, she asked me again the next night, when she called me to her quarters – after I slept, washed, got some food in me, was in a better condition to make life-changing decisions. She asked me again, told me there was space for me on her crew, but also let me know in no uncertain terms that I could leave whenever I wanted. But if life had taught me anything, it was that nothing in this life was free. So I asked her what I needed to do to earn my keep on the ship, she had just shrugged her shoulders.

“Whatever you want, whatever you can do.”

A searing sense of disappointment had rocketed down my spine, and she must’ve been able to see it on my face.

“Felix? What’s wrong?” she asked, confused, concerned, so, so kindly.

“I don’t want to sell my body any more,” I somehow managed to whisper before the tears overtook me and made me crumble into myself like a house of cards. I hadn’t noticed until just then how much I had hoped I could stay. Because the last 24 hours had been the first in a long time when nobody tried to touch me or talk to me or sell my body – when I felt somewhat safe.

She approached me carefully, asked me if she could touch me, a gesture so kind it made me cry harder, but I nodded, and she placed two strong, comforting hands on my shoulders, kneading my muscles, brushing her thumbs over my skin in regular circles until it grounded me a little.

“You don’t have to, Felix, never again. We would never ask that of you,” she murmured, lowly, calmly, and I had sobbed even harder. It’s a miracle now, looking back, how calm she stayed, faced with the broken shell of a boy in front of her. But she’s incredible like that. But back then, I didn’t even know how broken I was.

“But there’s nothing else I can do. I can’t fight, I never went to school. I’m useless to you if it’s not for my body.”

The captain had looked at me with so much pain in her eyes and shaken her head with determination.

“Don’t talk like that. I’m sure there’s something you can do. What do you do for fun?”

It was such an unexpected question at that moment, something nobody had ever bothered to ask me before, and it shook me out of my breakdown a little.

I said the only thing I could think of.

“I like to cook?”

And the captain had broken out into a huge smile.

“That’s perfect! We actually need someone to work in our kitchen. We’ve been doing a rotation and let me tell you, some weeks are definitely rougher than others.”

Her tone was so light, so hopeful, that I couldn’t help but latch on.

“Yeah? Why?”

She gave me a pained smile.

“Chan tried to make scrambled eggs the other week, and it ended up being just a dry brick. And the week after that Changbin put so much pepper in the stew it was inedible. He was nearly chased off the gangplank by 20 hungry pirates.”

I couldn’t help but giggle. The way she talked about them, like they weren’t just her crew, but like they were friends – it gave me so much hope.

“I …” I started, gathered all the courage that was left in my brittle body, “I make really nice scrambled eggs. The other … working boys and girls always said so. The … uh, never mind.”

But the captain just kept looking at me steadily and gave me an encouraging nod.

“No, please, tell me!”

I huffed out an awkward, broken little laugh. I felt stupid, but I felt like I had nothing more to lose.

“It’s … uh … the secret is to … add a little milk. Make them over low heat. Makes them all … silky. And if you have herbs, it really … it’s really nice.”

I’ll never forget the smile on the captain’s face when I finally raised my head. She clapped her hands happily.

“Oh, I’m so happy you’re here,” she exclaimed, jumped to her feet from where she was still crouching next to me. “I don’t know how much longer I would’ve survived Chan or Changbin’s weeks. You will make all of us very, very happy.”

She stretched out her hand to me, calmly waited for me to take it and helped me up. I swayed a little, but I managed to steady myself a little, scrub the tears off my cheeks.

“Why don’t you talk to Hyunjin later, let him know whatever you might need for, let’s say, two weeks at sea? And then he can get it before we set off.”

I nodded dumbly, and slowly turned to leave. But before I reached the door, I remembered something that had left me no peace.

“Captain?” I asked, and she hummed in response, all her attention back on me, “I … I saw … the cabin … I mean, it has two beds …”

She blinked at me, clearly not understanding, and I realised I needed to be brave one more time. She made me believe it would be okay.

“Will I have to share my cabin with someone?”

She gave me a long look, until her eyes widened in recognition. But the pity I feared would appear on her face never came. Instead, she smiled.

“Only if you want to.”

I took the deepest breath yet.

“I … if it’s possible at all, I … I really don’t want to.”

And she just nodded, gave me another smile before she turned back to her desk. “Then you won’t.”

From that day onwards, that cabin was my home. The next day, when I came back from my nervous, quick trip to the baths, I found a key, placed perfectly in the middle of my pillow. It was the key to the cabin door.

And I did lock the door for weeks, until I managed to leave it unlocked for one or two nights at a time without having a panic attack. Then three. Then four. Until one day I realised I had forgotten about the key entirely. I was safe.

And I never did have a roommate, for all the years I was on the ship. I was never asked to share, never even asked why I was the only one with no bunkmate, which was something I very quickly realised I was alone in.

Until the day Han Jisung arrived, and I saw the fear in his eyes when he saw the two bunks and I felt like I was looking in a cruel, warped mirror at my past, broken self. Hyunjin had whispered it to me, when he got back from the captain, that he was to get his own cabin as well, with a key, for the same reason I did, but something told me to do what I had never considered before – to offer him the second bunk in my room. Because Jisung seemed scared. Lost. Safe. And like he could really use a friend.

And I mean, he really did need a friend, that’s what we all learned. The day he set foot on our ship, a year and a half ago, started like any other. The sun rose on a cloudless sky, there was a stiff east wind. We intercepted one of Han Yujun’s ships only an hour after breakfast. It was way off course of its regular route and basically fell right into our lap. Everything seemed simple, like a routine.

But it quickly became very clear that this crew was different from his usual ones. The men were ruthless, angry, and overestimated themselves – but that was par of the course for the type of men Han Yujun hired. What was weird was how entirely aimless and uncoordinated they were. What was even weirder, was that their captain was nowhere to be seen.

And just when we thought that maybe he was hiding in the ship, or they just didn’t have one, a young man strutted into the middle of the fight.

It was clear from the first second that whoever he was, he was not like his crew. His boots were clean and expensive looking, his features were elegant, his skin soft and unmarred, and he was wearing an emerald green silk jacket that was entirely inappropriate for life on a ship.

That, and none of his crew paid him any mind. Worse, one of them laughed right into his face, and even tried to shove him into our swords, something that made the elegantly dressed captain draw his sword and raise it against his own crew member, something that was so entirely unheard of, it was almost laughable.

It was Minho who ordered Chan and Changbin to take that one hostage. There was a glint in his eye as he turned to the captain. They looked at each other, did their weird little telepathic communication thing, and the moment passed.

The man put up a good fight, a much better one than we thought he would be able to, based on his looks, but, like they usually did, in the end, he lost, and he was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the hold of our ship, while we dealt with the rest.

Nothing else was out of the ordinary about the clean-up, raiding of the other ship, where I ended up getting a less than impressive haul of their leftover provisions that were clearly of the cheapest kind – until Chan came running in while Hyunjin was helping me peel potatoes a day later exclaiming that the guy they had captured was none other than Han Yujun’s nephew. And that the captain had just offered him a spot on the crew.

It was an outrage. Hyunjin couldn’t believe it. He kept asking Chan if he was sure, asking him to repeat over and over again what he heard, but it always ended up the same. The man in the emerald silk jacket’s name was Han Jisung, nephew of Han Yujun, the man we had been holding Andros and the surrounding islands in a violent political and criminal chokehold, the man we had been working for years to take down. And the captain had offered him a place among us. Hyunjin was immediately against it, huffed and puffed, talked of going to the captain to talk her out of it, but Chan stopped him, somehow. He calmly talked to him until Hyunjin no longer looked he was about run out the door. But he was by no means done.

“Do you think he’ll accept the captain’s offer?” Hyunjin asked, his arms crossed over his chest, a petulant scowl on his face.

Chan shrugged.

“I think he might, but he’s stubborn. Kind of arrogant.”

Hyunjin narrowed his eyes further and Chan sighed.

“But come on, Hyune, imagine how much he knows. He could be the last piece of the puzzle, we could finally get Han Yujun …”

And as much as I hated it, he had a point. Though, Hyunjin didn’t seem to agree.

“Is that why the captain is asking him to join us? So he can be useful? I’m not harbouring the enemy’s family in my cabins on the off chance we get something out of him before he murders one of us!”

Chan lifted his hands defensively.

“Listen, I’m not saying to trust him, immediately, I will keep an eye on him, but the captain, she kind of seemed convinced and … well, she’s never been wrong.”

Hyunjin grumbled, gave Chan another glare.

“Well, there’s a first time for everything …”

But I could tell his resolve was starting to melt. After all, the captain really had never made a wrong call.

Before he left to go back to the cells, we made Chan promise to find out as much as possible about Jisung in the hours he was set to guard him, and to report anything suspicious back to us.

He came back the next day and, almost sheepishly, told us, that there was nothing suspicious whatsoever about the man. Carefully, he relayed everything Jisung had told him. That his parents were dead, probably killed by his uncle, though he had no proof, so there was nothing he could do. That he had no money to his name beyond what his uncle gave him, no home beyond his uncle’s house, where he was under constant surveillance from the staff. That he was meant to marry some other politician’s daughter, one he had made the mistake of sleeping with a few times, and who had consequently blackmailed him into agreeing to the marriage ploy her father and his uncle had hatched, by telling him she was pregnant, only for him to find out that she wasn’t.

Hyunjin was still a little wary, told Chan it was weird that he just told him all of this, but Chan looked almost sad. He kept insisting that something was different about Han Jisung, that he seemed … real. That he looked so sad when he spoke about his parents. That he called them Eomma and Appa, as well, just like Chan back in the day. That there had been tears in his eyes when he spoke of them. Hyunjin eventually came around, though not before he made Chan promise to keep a tight watch on him. I … didn’t know what I thought. I had seen Jisung, on the day he was captured, and I saw how his crew treated him, so what Chan told us did line up. But nonetheless – Han Yujun was his family. There was no knowing what he was like, what he thought, what he believed in. Hell, he may have no plans of dismantling his uncle’s empire. Maybe he just wanted to inherit it.

So I was pretty much dead set on keeping my distance, on being very careful and going to the captain if I thought anything at all was off – until Chan brought Jisung to lunch the day he accepted the captain’s offer and I walked out of the kitchen to find not a strange, rugged captain, not an unlikeable aristocrat asshole, not Han Yujun’s nephew, but just … a boy. My age. Deathly pale, looking one stiff breeze away from either vomiting or turning around and running away. So I made a split-second decision. After all, the captain only took one look at me and gave me a chance.

I gave him the most trustworthy, positive smile I could muster, and stretched out my hand.

“Ah, you’re Jisung! So you took the captain’s offer. Welcome. You won’t regret it.”

And I led him to my part of the table, where Hyunjin gave me an incredulous stare, one I returned by motioning to Jisung and furrowing my brows, wordlessly saying look at him! He’s shaking like a leaf.

And it’s really a testament to Jisung’s personality how fast and how entirely he melted Hyunjin within just a few minutes. So much so that, even when he mentioned the captain and Minho fighting, when Minho stormed in, a flavour of anger and self-loathing he only ever exuded when something happened between him and the captain, Hyunjin ended up reassuring Jisung.

And I couldn’t even blame him, because there was something so shockingly, absolutely unexpectedly sincere about the man. I suddenly understood why Chan believed every word he said because Han Jisung seemed to just do that. Tell the truth. His clumsy attempts at returning Changbin and Hyunjin’s banter. His panicked look around when Hyunjin asked him about his sexuality. His genuine, concern and confusion in his big sparkling eyes when Seungmin grilled him about the maps. Every single thing he felt was just right there, his expressive face so revealing, it was simply impossible for him to be lying.

It was also what gave him away a few weeks later, when I caught him staring at the captain across the deck as she talked to Seungmin. Jisung’s expression was nothing short of starstruck, big eyes, flushed cheeks. I didn’t think much of it then, because almost any of us on the crew, who were into women, were infatuated with her at some point. And Jisung, with his round cheeks and his almost puppy-like infatuation with her, didn’t feel threatening in the slightest. Cute, even.

But then we heard of the kiss. Of Chan rounding the corner to Minho, half naked, trapping Jisung’s equally half-dressed body against the wall, Jisung’s tongue in his mouth.

The guilt was radiating off Chan in waves that night, to the point where it drove us fucking crazy. But we couldn’t get it out of him, no matter how often we asked. We only found out what happened two weeks later, when I woke up, docked in Nassau, to Jisung’s bed unslept in, the hazy memory of him disappearing with the captain in my mind and badly contained hangover anxiety buzzing through my veins.

Chan, Hyunjin and Seungmin were already waiting in the kitchen when I walked in and Chan told us everything, spilled it all like he had been waiting for for a long time. What he saw. How he ran to the captain to tell her without a second thought. The look in her eyes. Then, Minho, half-wet and out of his mind, barking at him to leave before he locked himself in with the captain. And through it all, he kept saying that he didn’t know what to do. Kept asking us if it was wrong that he told the captain. But that it was the captain! And Minho … Minho was meant to be faithful. How could Minho betray her?! Minho’s love had always been obvious, it was the captain who clearly kept the distance between them. So it didn’t make any sense for him to do this. And she deserved, to know? Right?

And then there was Jisung. Chan was so disappointed when he told us about pulling Jisung aside after the kiss, how awkward it had been, confronting him. But how Chan had done it, for the captain. And how Jisung had said “I don’t want to break them up” and how angry it had made Chan because how was the outcome of him kissing Minho not going to be him and the captain breaking up?!

But while Chan raged, while Hyunjin bit his bottom lip to shreds, while Seungmin argued with Chan, saying that we shouldn’t meddle in their relationship, whatever it was; that whatever they were or weren’t, wasn’t for us to get involved in – I remembered the way Jisung looked at the captain and suddenly realised that maybe, just maybe, Jisung meant something very different when he said that he didn’t want to break them up.

But it was crazy, unheard of – something that was possible in fiction, or in your wildest dreams, but it didn’t just happen. And the captain and Minho, their relationship wasn’t exactly casual, something that Jisung would just be able to insert himself into. Their bond had been built over years, years of the two of them against the world, locked into the captain’s quarters, Minho’s entire existence dedicated to protecting and serving the captain – the captain’s gaze always returning to Minho, relying on him, needing him. Jisung had just joined. He had no history with either of them. It was madness.

Looking back at it now, I still think I was right. I still think that Jisung was crazy, delusional even, for falling for both of them the way he did. Because he did fall, head over heels, completely crazily and entirely, over such a short period of time. And I told him this, a few months ago, on one of the nights he spent in our cabin, something that had become increasingly rare, most of his nights, and his days, spent with the captain and Minho now (except for meal times. He still faithfully appears in the kitchen every single day, for breakfast, lunch, and dinner prep. Most of the days even on time, unless he stumbles in flushed and dazed, with love bites all over his neck and I have to tell him to go scrub his face and hands and arms, for good measure, before I will even consider letting him get close to something edible, but I digress).

When I told him I thought he was insane, Jisung, dear, sweet, Jisung, had only hidden his face in my pillow, squealed like a teenage girl, before looking at me with stars in his eyes, until I couldn’t remember how I could ever be mad about it.

“I know, Lix … isn’t it crazy? How did this happen?!”

I didn’t tell him this back then, but I truly believe that he was the only person who could’ve done what he did, become what he did, simply because he was Jisung. Jisung, with his heart on his sleeve, Jisung with his pretty face and his little waist and his frankly dangerous arrogance and his shocking ruthlessness and proficiency with a sword – and his inability to tell anything but the truth, without which none of this would’ve ever happened. Because a lesser person would’ve just … shut up. Counted their blessings, kept their feelings to themselves, either left the ship or moved on. But Jisung didn’t. Jisung pushed Minho until he cracked, Jisung kept looking at the captain like she hung the stars in the sky – and then loved Minho so openly and unashamedly that it took Minho months to stop blushing every time Jisung flirted with him in public. Adored the captain with everything he had, never tried to change her, instead met her where she was and with his own love, and his love of Minho and her love, made her soften and bloom in front of all of us.

Not in her treatment of our enemies, oh no, she’s a cold, as murderous, as merciless and violent as ever. But when it’s just us, the crew on the ship, sailing from one port to the next, on the simple cargo delivery jobs we’ve started taking every now and again, dipping our toes into legitimate business in the absence of the region’s most notorious criminal, she was glowing. She, always accompanied by Jisung and Minho, of course, spent more time of her mealtimes in the mess. Stuck around afterwards. Told us stories, countless stories, of her life before us, sometimes aided by Seungmin, when it was something that happened while they were sailing under their old captain. She told us stories of the Americas, of the open ocean, of the Arctic. Of the European shores that she saw but never got to set foot on. Of battles so gruesome, so bloody, the stories alone made us gasp and Minho pale.

It’s nice. We can hear the stories now, because life is peaceful. The seas are safer. We barely ever run into drug or human traffickers any more, and when we do, they’re usually small groups, splintered off what used to be Han Yujun subsidised organisations. They’re easy to eradicate, often relying on only a handful of ships, most of which we intercept, making the business one of astronomical losses that cannot even be offset by the few that escape Jeongin’s watchful eye.

Needless to say, it’s been a good year, since the day Han Yujun died. We sail. We deliver cargo. Patrol the few areas where traffickers and criminals still operate. We’ve even made a tentative peace with the new administration of Andros Island, Han Yujun’s successor, who has allowed us to walk and sail freely after the extent of the crimes Han Yujun had been committing had been revealed. That and I think he’s into the captain. Minho seems to think so, too, because he always finds a reason to go on land with the captain when we dock at Andros. If she’s noticed, I wouldn’t be able to tell. But she doesn’t stop him.

Sometimes we meet the captain’s former captain, mostly in Nassau, where have been going more often since the news of the captain’s victory over Han Yujun has made our crew somewhat of a guest of honour, always guaranteeing us a docking place at the quays, a good price on everything from provisions to fabric, which meant that Hyunjin could finally do the upgrade of all the textiles on the ship, that he’s been wanting for so long – sowing us all new sheets, new curtains, new, more lavish clothing, even buy us sturdier leather boots. For my last birthday, he gave me baby blue sheets, dotted all over with small, hand embroidered daisies. I cried so much it made Hyunjin cry, too, but I think it was happy tears. He blushes every time I walk right past him on laundry day to wash them with my own hands, because I don’t trust anyone else with them. They’re my most prized possession.

But our crew discount also made it impossible for Hyunjin to have a counterargument when Minho one day returned from one of his brooding walks with three kittens in his arms and tears in his eyes, talking about how he had found them behind a fish shop, where the fishmonger was trying to beat them away with a broom. How one of them had a broken leg and how the fishmonger had vowed to kill them if they ever came back, something Minho said we couldn’t let happen.

Not like Hyunjin could’ve resisted him, not when our usual, grumpy, scary Minho was softly cradling a little tabby to his chest, carefully holding his little broken paw in his palm, while two orange kittens were climbing over his shoulders.

Minho bathed them in one of the bathtubs, the water filled only an inch, scrubbing their little limbs and faces, talking to them quietly and not making a fuss when one of them inevitably scratched him.

So Hyunjin sighed, and planned in more provisions. And Minho called them Soonie, Doongie and Dori, and they slept every night in a corner of the captain’s quarters (and sometimes, if one of us was very lucky, in one of our beds), and they became a treasured part of our crew – and Minho’s pride and joy.

And he’s so soft for them, too, cooing and smiling at them, picking them up and carrying them around in his pockets. And I know I talked a lot about Jisung and the captain softening, opening up, but in neither of them has it been as obvious as in Minho. He seems so much happier, so much more at peace, and much less scary and volatile, like something very heavy has finally lifted off his chest. He still gets bitchy, of course he does, he’s our Minho after all, but these days he usually comes around soon enough, mumbles something close enough to an apology or just dumps one of the kitties on our arms as a way of asking for forgiveness.

But, of course, not everything is perfect. The captain still distances herself or locks herself away sometimes, Jisung still has his moments of arrogance, and Minho still broods and scowls and lashes out. It’s just the way it is. I don’t love them any less for it. It just means they’re human. They’re my family, I love them despite it all. And I want them to be well, when they don’t seem to be.

I usually keep an eye on Minho when we dock in Nassau. I don’t think he knows that I know that his mother is buried there. And to be honest, I only know it because I visited the old, dilapidated churchyard the other month, after I heard of my adoptive father, the vicar’s, passing. I went alone, walked the paths of my childhood, even made it into the chapel, down the cool, empty aisle, all the way to the door of the sacristy – though I couldn’t go further. It was like his ghost was still haunting the place, like I would open the door, and he would be there, staring me down. So I turned, pushed through the big, heavy door, out into the balmy autumn air and took a deep, shaky breath. As I was walking through the graveyard, trying to regulate my heartbeat, strolling aimlessly under the cool shade of the sparse pines, one particular grave suddenly caught my eye.

It had no headstone, nothing to mark it except a crooked, rotten wooden cross that barely hung on by a single nail. It stood out like a sore thumb amongst the other, thick, intricately carved headstones. The name was barely legible any more.

Lee Young-mi, 08/11/16–– to 16/10/16––

And sure, it could’ve been a coincidence, but the last name, the date, the year. The shoddily nailed together cross. That and, in retrospect, Minho’s irritability every time we set foot on Nassau. It all made a little too much sense.

And really, Minho’s apprehension had always been visible, I had just always assumed he hated Nassau for all the reasons we all sometimes hated it; because it smelled bad, and because its neutrality provided a safe harbour for us privateers, yes, but also by its very nature did the same for crime and depravity. But now, knowing that his mother was buried there – it was hard not to see how it affected him. How he got quiet, distracted. Often zoned out, scowling at some point in the middle distance.

And usually either Jisung or the captain would find him eventually, and he would soften, his eyes losing some of their darkness, but I still kept an eye on him. Just to be safe.

I do it because I care about him, and deep down, also because I sometimes still have a hard time feeling like I deserve being on the ship. Watching out for Minho, even in just such a small way, makes me feel a little bit more deserving of his fierce protection.

God, this sounds bad, doesn’t it? Like the only reason I care for them is because I feel guilty … But it’s so much more than that, I promise. I love them so deeply.

Like that one night, when I found the captain on the deck, during the two weeks we thought we lost Minho and Jisung, on our way to Andros to end it all – I meant it when I said she should let herself love them when we found them. I remember my own hopelessness, trying to shove it aside so I could help her push through, because I couldn’t stand the knowledge that she, who had done everything for us, was there in front of me, falling apart because she lost the one thing she always wanted but always denied herself.

Because our captain’s life had always been dedicated to us. To taking us in, giving us a home and a job and a purpose. Then to lead us towards a common goal. Working tirelessly, putting herself on the line time and time again, risking her life to keep us safe. The sacrifices she made for all of those years, to keep us safe and on track – they were never a secret. No, she never spoke about them, but it was obvious.

So when I told her to let herself love them, loudly and openly, what I really wanted to say was “you’ve sacrificed everything for us, so many times. Let yourself have this. We want you to have this.”

And thank God she did. When she threw herself into Jisung’s arms, in the middle of the battle of our lives, the smile on her face bright like she wasn’t covered in grime and blood and wasn’t bleeding from the cut on her arm – it was like the sun rose. Then, Minho, coming down those stairs with his bad eye covered by the eyepatch that has become a usual part of his getup now, his eye having never recovered, and slotting himself back into this place behind the captain – It was like they had never been gone in all senses except the tiredness in my bones, the pain of knowing what the captain and I went through, talked about during all those hours in Jisung’s cot.

I can look back on it now because we made it. It’s all good now. The three of them, they’re happy together. Jisung is a ball of sunshine. He still helps me in the kitchen, every single day, and often eats with us, but most of his days, and his nights, are spent in the captain’s quarters now. He usually occupies the spot behind the captain on the left side, the only person Minho trusts to take over his blind spot. Jisung is sweet. He’s usually touching one of them, and it would be wildly imrpoper on a pirate ship if it wasn’t us, and if it wasn’t him. His hand slithering into Minho’s back pocket, linking his pinky with the captain’s when he thinks nobody is looking. And while Jisung keeps his flirting to a minimum with the captain, no doubt her orders, because she is our captain after all, I’ve walked in on Minho and Jisung kissing more times than I can count – even in the baths once, doing … much more than kissing, an incident I have tried to scrub from my memory, to no avail.

Unlike Changbin, who was almost giddy with excitement, when he told a select group (Hyunjin, Chan, Jeongin and me) in great detail how, when he had to urgently wake the captain the other day, had made his bumbling, apologetic way into the captain’s bedroom, and had watched first, a fluffy, disoriented, shirtless Jisung, then a sleepy but murderous looking naked Minho, pop up, both of who protectively pushed down the captain between them when she tried to sit up, asking what was going on. I asked him once if he didn’t think he was a little too invested in their relationship, but he always just waves me off.

“I’ve watched Minho pine over the captain for years. I watched him get sad when she pushed him away, I let him take his anger out on me when he got frustrated – I deserve to be happy and a little nosey now.”

And it seems that the captain, loving, covertly, privately, yet openly, has made some others feel like they finally have permission to do the same.

Hyunjin and Chan became official in the late summer. It was an understated affair. One night, when everyone was gathered in the common area, just hanging out, drinking, reading, playing cards, a balmy, salty breeze blowing in through the portholes, Hyunjin skipped in, walked over to where Chan was lounging on a beanbag and planted himself right in his lap, just like he usually did.

Except this time he turned around, stared at a wide-eyed Chan with a petulant determination in his eyes, before he leaned in and kissed him square on the mouth. It was quite sweet, watching Chan melt into it, every one of his familiar touches speaking volumes about how much, and for how long, they’ve been doing this.

When Hyunjin pulled back he was blushing furiously, but he stared at everyone with a scowl, like he was challenging someone to say something negative. When nobody did, when everyone just slowly returned to whatever they were doing, Hyunjin deflated so visibly that Chan laughed, pressed a kiss to his temple and murmured a quiet “told you it would be fine” before kissing him again.

And Seungmin and Jeongin … whatever is going on between them is almost imperceptible, and I think most of the crew haven’t noticed. Even Hyunjin refuses to say anything at all about them, though I know he knows more than he lets on. But I don’t push. If they need to figure this out by themselves, they should. But something has clearly changed between them, finally. They no longer stare at each other when they think the other isn’t looking. They often look at each other now, over the table, something special in their eyes. Where there used to be sadness, uncertainty, longing, there’s warmth, love, want now. It’s tentative, like a blooming in sprint, but it’s there.

Them. Chan and Hyunjin’s easy companionship. The captain and Minho and Jisung’s devotion. I wish it didn’t, but it has made me wish for what I never thought I could have. Love. Intimacy. Partnership. But … maybe … no, I don’t know.

It’s all very new, you know. Something that has only just … he …

God, this is harder when it’s about me.

A couple weeks ago, while I was cleaning up the last plates after dinner. Changbin had wandered in, his fists buried deep in his pockets, looking so pale and nervous that I thought at first that he was ill.

But when I asked him if he was, he only blushed deeply, flush climbing from his neck up to his hairline until he was entirely pink.

“No, uhm …” he stammered out, “I was just wondering … when we go to Andros … I heard there’s a really big market. With wares from all over the world. Apparently the new governor has been making some trades and … well, I thought maybe you would want to check it out? Find some new stuff to cook with? Or just look around, really …”

He’d said all of this almost in one breath, barely looking at me, only throwing me little glances here or there, and I didn’t understand why he was so nervous.

“Sure, Bin,” I had laughed, but I regretted it immediately when his face fell, “Hyunjin and I were going to go together, he wanted to find some perfumes or soaps or fabrics, but you’re welcome to come, too!”

Whatever I said was clearly the wrong thing because his face fell even more, his eyebrows drawing together, making him look almost angry.

“Ah, it’s alright. You go with Hyunjin,” he had just muttered. He gave me a pained little smile and rushed out of the kitchen before I could say anything else.

When I told Jisung about it the next day while we were making lunch, he almost dropped his knife. He rushed over to me, took both my hands into his and stared at me so intently it almost scared me.

“Lix …” he breathed, his eyes sparkling brightly, “Changbin was asking you out! He was asking you out on a date!”

First, I blushed. Then I started panicking, really hard. So hard that I’m pretty sure I stopped breathing for a second, because Jisung suddenly looked very worried and led me over to sit on a crate of potatoes.

“Lix, are you okay? Breathe for me, please,” he mumbled, and I somehow managed to gulp down a single breath of air that felt like it lodged itself into my chest sideways.

“He can’t want to date me,” I choked out. Jisung looked confused.

“But, why, Lix? You’re wonderful? Anyone should be lucky to date you.”

I shook my head vehemently.

“He might think he wants to, but he doesn’t. Not when I’m … the way I am.”

“What do you mean? Don’t you like him?”

And to be honest, I had never even asked myself if I did. Because it had never been an option. And Changbin had just always … been there. A calm, soothing presence. Probably the person I loved cooking for the most because of how wholeheartedly he seemed to enjoy it, and how he would compliment me every single day. The heart and soul of the crew, always there for words of advice but never scared to tell the truth, to put someone into place when they were out of line. Yes, of course, he was gorgeous in a way I knew not everyone appreciated. His body was big and solid and strong and when he hugged me, I never wanted to let go.

“I … I don’t know, I … maybe? Maybe I could? But Jisung … it doesn’t matter. Because he will want to have sex with whoever he’s dating and I … I don’t think I ever want to do that again.”

That was only half the truth because I knew I didn’t. But that felt too scary to just … say.

Finally, Jisung seemed to understand. He blinked at me for a good few seconds, before he got up, started pacing up and down in front of me, deep in thought. Then he stopped.

“How do you know that? Did he say something?”

He sounded indignant, almost. I just stared at him, shook my head.

“I mean, no … I don’t know … I’ve never ever seen him flirt with anyone, so I wouldn’t know, but … doesn’t everyone want that? Have sex?”

Jisung shrugged.

“I mean, I do, yeah, but I was thinking and … if the captain had told me she wouldn’t want to sleep with me – I think I would’ve been okay with that. I would still want her, of course, but that would be … a separate thing, you know? Because I would still love her.”

I scoffed.

“Not everyone has a special relationship like that, Jisung. Changbin probably just has a stupid crush on me. It’ll pass.”

Jisung came back to me, sat next to me on the crate, wrapped an arm around me.

“You don’t know that. Just … why don’t you give it a chance? See where it goes? Wouldn’t you want to know? If there’s a chance? … Don’t you want to be loved?”

The way he asked it, with his own love shimmering in his voice, painting beautiful images of tenderness, reminding me of Seungmin’s gaze on Jeongin when he laughed, on Chan’s hand on Hyunjin’s waist when he opened doors for him – I almost hated Jisung because he was right, and I couldn’t ignore the fact that I did, desperately, want to be loved.

But I was also terrified to get hurt. Terrified of opening myself up to everything Changbin and I could be, only to be disappointed. To fall and to not be caught, or worse, to fall and then betray myself for the rest of my life, only so I could keep being loved.

So as much as I would like to describe the first weeks of Changbin’s, for lack of a better word, courtship, as a time of sweetness and soft touches, it was anything but. It was me, fighting tooth and nail, every day, to let myself hope while also protecting myself.

But he was … perfect. A few days after he asked me out, he started sticking around long after everyone was done with dinner. He didn’t say anything, just stayed, helped me carry the plates into the kitchen. Asked me if I would like him to go get the water, so I wouldn’t have to lug the full bucket back and forth. Talked to me as if he never asked me out, about anything and everything.

And before I knew it, it became a sort of ritual. Jisung, who used to help me clean up, subtly, seemingly casually, started leaving dinner with everyone else when he realised Changbin started sticking around – obnoxiously winking at me, shooting me thumbs up, before no doubt slipped away to tell the captain and Minho all about it. But I couldn’t be mad, so preoccupied was I with not falling head over heels for Changbin’s gentle hands when he washed the dishes, the way his hair fell into his eyes where he was leaned over the tub, how softly he talked about his life and the way his cheeks dimpled when he smiled.

He asked me out again two weeks after the first time he tried. At least this time, I was prepared. But I also knew that I needed to say something now, to protect myself – and to be fair to him. So when he asked me if I wanted to go on a walk with him the next time we were on Abaco, because he’d had heard there was a beach, usually deserted, with sand as fine as stardust and lots of shells to collect, I forced myself to interrupt him.

“Changbin, is this … am I reading this wrong, or are you trying to ask me out?”

Changbin looked almost relieved. He ran a nervous hand through his hair, chuckled sheepishly.

“Uh, yeah … I hope it wasn’t too awkward,” he mumbled, and it was so sweet I had to swallow down the army of butterflies wreaking havoc on my insides. This was going to hurt.

“Binnie, I don’t think …” I started, petered out because I lost my courage, but Changbin froze instantly. His face fell, and he looked devastated, but mostly embarrassed.

“Oh,” he breathed out, before he unfroze, gaze glued to the floor, “Oh, I see. Don’t worry. It was just … I just … never mind. Ignore what I said.”

And God, if I had been stronger, I would’ve left it at that. Let him think that was what it was and licked my wounds, healed my broken heart now, while it was only sporting cracks. But something in me, maybe it was my desperation to be loved, maybe it was Jisung’s influence, maybe it was just … something that told me that Changbin was different – something in me forced me to step forward, into Changbin’s space, making him look up at me with wide eyes.

“No, Binnie, it’s not that … I would love to go on a date with you,” I managed to mumble, and the way Changbin’s face brightened, the way his ridiculously beautiful smile returned, it made my heart ache.

“But … can we sit?”

Changbin nodded, and I led him out to the mess hall. We sat down at one of the tables and I put everything on the line. I told him about how I grew up. How I had never cared for sex. How I tried it and didn’t see the appeal. How I sold my body and never felt a thing. And finally, my voice so shaky it was barely recognisable, that I never wanted to have sex again.

“It’s … it’s not you. Not at all. I just … I don’t like it, having sex, it never felt like something I did for me. And I don’t think I ever want to do it again. Not with anyone.”

I was avoiding looking at him at this point, because I felt so fragile that one mean look from him would have shattered like a vial of glass. I had never opened myself up to anyone so entirely, not even the captain, not even Jisung. It was terrifying, placing my glass heart into his hands. But it was Changbin, right? Changbin would never. I hoped.

“So, much as you think you might want to date me … I don’t know if you do. Because I’m not like other people you could be dating. I won’t be able to give you that.”

Changbin was quiet for a long moment. So long I couldn’t take the suspense any more and finally looked at him.

He looked thoughtful, but not disgusted, and that was enough for the moment. Enough to make tendrils of hope bloom in my chest.

“So … just so I know I understood this correctly. You … you would like to date me, you might even like me, but you just don’t like sex. Don’t want to have it. With anyone, ever again?”

I nodded. I swallowed the need to grovel, to beg, to tell him I would do anything to be with him but that. I swallowed, suffocated the worst thought – that I would maybe even do if that was really needed for him to want me.

And Changbin nodded as well, looked at me so gently that tears started pooling in my eyes.

But then he said, “okay. Can you give me a day to think about it?” and just like that, he shattered my heart into a million pieces.

But I smiled. I nodded. Ignored the tears pooling in my eyes. I held my breath, watched dumbly as he smiled gently, touched my hand, ran his thumb over my knuckles, got up and left. Then I started crying. I cried myself to sleep that night and barely managed to get up in time to make breakfast. I walked into the kitchen to Jisung already there. He dropped everything when he saw my swollen eyes, and pulled me into a hug that just made me cry harder.

He asked me what happened, and I told him, stammered it out through the sobs, and he hugged me tighter, led me to the same crate of potatoes he sat me down a few weeks prior, and told me to just sit there while he made breakfast. He did it all himself, quietly, only asking small, hesitant questions every now and again, and somehow even made me coffee, scrambled me some eggs, let me remain in the kitchen while he took care of the breakfast rush. He did what he could to keep an eye on me, to distract me, but it was pointless. The pain of it, the humiliation, the terror of what Changbin could do with the information I had given him – the knowledge that I would have to face him again. I wondered which side the captain would choose if I told her I needed to go. If she could make Changbin keep his mouth shut. If she would ask him to leave. I couldn’t live with that, the crew needed Changbin …

When the doors swung open, I opened my mouth to ask Jisung if he thought I should go see the captain right away, but instead of his, I instead met Changbin’s eyes.

When he spotted me, his eyes widened and softened, and they were filled with so much pity it made me nauseous. He approached me slowly.

“Yongbokkie …” he breathed out, carefully went to crouch down in front of where I was still sitting on that stupid potato crate, probably looking like a fool, crying over him. “Why are you crying? What happened?”

It was too much. The pity. Now this. My throat felt like it was lined with glass shards, and it was audible in my voice.

“What do you mean what happened? Was the rejection not enough? Did you come to gloat?”

The realisation visibly washed over him and he paled.

“Hey, hey …” he reached out a careful hand, soothed it over my arm. I didn’t have the strength to pull away. I started crying again. “I didn’t … I never meant to.”

He took a deep breath and got up, made me scoot over until he could squeeze onto the crate next to me. The change of position was welcome. At least now I wasn’t forced to look at him any more.

“I wanted to take a day to think about it because … Yongbok, that was a big, important thing you shared with me there. It was really personal, and I could see how difficult it was.”

He took a deep breath. I watched, out of the corner of my eye, how he nervously cracked his knuckles in his lap. His hands still looked so soft and gentle and gorgeous, and I still wanted to hold them so badly, and it hurt so, so much.

“And to be honest, I had never heard of something like it before. I just kinda assumed everyone wanted to … you know. But, I thought about it all night, and I also … I talked to the captain – without mentioning your name, of course! Just, I needed advice and …”

He turned to me, waited for a second for me to do the same, but I couldn’t. He didn’t push me.

“Well, I think it’s fine. It makes sense, even. Hell, sex is not that important to me either. And if you really feel like that, then who am I to tell you anything different. Especially with the job you used to do, I mean … that must’ve been tough.”

It felt like an out of body experience, listening to him. He sounded so sincere, so serious.

“So I, uhh …” Changbin started, but hesitated, “Yongbokkie, I would really love it if you could look at me when I say this.”

Blindly, like I was pulled by an invisible string, I straightened up, turned to him, met his eyes, his sweet, soft eyes, looking back at me with an expression I’d never seen in them before.

“Yongbok, I’d still love to … you know … go on a date with you. Take you to that beach. Fully clothed, of course! I mean, if you want. Just … for the shells. And to hang out with you. Because I would like to do that. Spend more time with you. Like that. If you want it.”

I don’t remember what was going on in my poor, muddled head at that moment. White noise. Too many thoughts and so much hope and so many stupid butterflies because he was there, right in front of me, looking so gorgeous it made me dizzy and …

“You would … even if we can’t ever have sex?”

Changbin blushed, shrugged softly.

“Like, I said, it’s not really the most important thing to me, anyway.”

“No, but, Bin …” I insisted, “I need you to be sure, because … it won’t change. If you change your mind, then … Bin, it will hurt.”

Changbin shook his head, reached out, gently cupped my face in his hands and let his thumb run over my cheek.

“I’m sure. I would never want you to do something you’re not comfortable with. And I would never force you to do anything.”

He dropped his hands again, and their absence felt like a physical ache.

“So, let me ask you again. Do you want to take a walk with me, when we get to Abaco? I heard there’s a really nice beach, super secluded, with sand as fine as stardust, and with the prettiest shells you’ve ever seen.”

And I nodded.

And we went. And we walked, side by side, talking about everything under the sun, until we reached the secluded beach. And it was the most beautiful place I’d ever seen. The water was clear and turquoise, the sand so fine it sparkled in the sun like a thousand diamonds. And the shells! There were so many, one more perfect, more stunning than the other. We spent hours collecting them, and then we went back, dumped them all into a pile on the floor in the corner of the common room, arranged them into the perfect combinations, and then I taught Changbin how to tie macramé knots, and we made hanging ornaments. One for each of us, and one for Hyunjin, who joined us at some point, cooed over the pretty shells so much that Changbin agreed to make him one, too.

We were the last ones to leave the common room that night and Changbin insisted on walking me back to my cabin, blushing and ignoring my giggles when I told him he kind of had to because his cabin was literally right next door.

But he dropped me off, smiled at me so softly it made my entire chest erupt into butterflies, told me he had the best day he’d had in a long time and just … left. And I loved him even more for it because it gave me hope that he really meant it, but a part of me couldn’t help but wish he had kissed me, wished he had stayed. Not to … fool around, but just to spend more time with him. Maybe pull him up into my cot. Pull his body close, sink into his strong arms.

He didn’t kiss me on our next date either. Nor on the next one. Until we were sat on the same beach again weeks later, this time just chatting, snacking on the picnic basket I had made for us. I looked over at him, and suddenly, I knew I didn’t want to spend another minute without knowing what his lips tasted like.

So I climbed into his lap, dropped the cube of cheese in his hands back into the bowl he had just plucked it from, wrapped my hands around his neck and pressed my lips to his. The sound he made, something between a squeak and a breathy little moan, will be stuck in my head forever.

When he didn’t kiss me back, I pulled away, and he looked completely out of his depth.

“Is this fine?” he asked, breathless and entirely uncertain, and I realised that he meant if this was something I wanted to do. That he didn’t want me to feel pressured, that he wasn’t sure if I was doing this for myself or for him. I didn’t know if I should cry or laugh, but instead I just leaned in, kissed him again, only pulled back enough to whisper a few words to him.

“Don’t worry, I want this. I’m not made of glass.”

And that’s all it took for him to kiss me back, and it was a little cheesy and sometimes our teeth clashed because we were smiling so much, but despite that, or maybe because of that, it was so mind-numbingly good. Tender. Addicting.

And we figured the rest out. When he got hard underneath me for the first time, he blushed, apologised, even though I told him not to, and manoeuvred me until our crotches weren’t touching any more. And when, a few days later, we were making out in my bed and I got hard, he didn’t panic, just pulled away and asked me to tell him if everything was alright. And I did. I told him that it was my body reacting to him, but that I still didn’t change my mind. I said the last part a lot less gracefully than I like to admit, with a lot more stammering and self-consciousness, but he understood. And then he told me that he needed me to know that, of course, he, or his body, wanted me like that, that he was attracted to me, but that had nothing to do with me. Or rather, that it didn’t mean that he wanted to do anything differently. That this was enough. He would deal with it later. And then I kissed him again, and he sighed into my lips and slipped his hand under my shirt, not touching me, just resting his warm palm and my back, and then I did cry a little bit because I couldn’t believe I got so lucky. He held me through that, too. And we fell asleep like that. And the next day, he got up with me and made breakfast with me and Jisung, who grinned at us like an idiot when we walked in together. And that was that.

So, yeah. That happened.

And I don’t know what the future holds. I really don’t. But these days, I’m no longer scared of it.

The captain is still as dedicated to this life, her ship, her crew, as ever. We still hunt the bad guys, stand up for those who need it. But the work feels less hopeless now, more like we’re making an actual difference. And because of what we went through, because our purpose remains the same, our crew has only become stronger, more tight-knit, more like a family since the day Han Yujun finally died.

So this, the crew, the ship, it feels like forever. I’d like for it to be. It would be my first.

I asked the captain once, if she thought she would one day put all of this behind her, settle down somewhere, maybe start a family, and she had scowled at me.

“And do what? Plant vegetables? Become a sedentary housewife, sit on the porch all day? No, thanks. I’d rather be out here, be free, be of use.”

I had nodded. It was understandable, after all. And really, I couldn’t picture her like that, either, at least not anytime soon.

“But what about a family? You could have that here, too?”

She had blinked at me for a solid second before she made a face, slapped my arm, shook her head like I had just suggested something outlandish.

But I can imagine it. A little captain running around the ship, growing up in conditions that normal people would frown at, but with more love than the little thing could ever wish for. Because we would all love on them. Maybe a little girl with Minho’s fierce eyes. A little Jisung with chubby cheeks and big, brown doe eyes that nobody can say no to. And even just seeing how Minho cares for Soonie, Doongie and Dori, how his voice softens when he talks to them, how he plays with them sometimes when he thinks nobody’s watching. They would make good parents. I dare say we all would.

But whatever happens, I will be around until the end. I couldn’t imagine a better place to be. I have a roof over my head, a warm cabin where the sunlight streams in in the morning. Soft, baby blue sheets with hand embroidered daisies that one of my best friends made for me. A kitchen I can call my own and a crew to feed. Jisung to prep the food for me and Changbin to do the dishes with me, when we don’t get distracted kissing each other until our lips are numb.

A crew I call my family. A captain I would follow until the ends of the earth. The captain’s second-in-command, who protects us all like it’s his second nature. A best friend who loves me with more enthusiasm than I ever thought I deserved. A boyfriend who likes me, might love me, exactly for who I am.

A really beautiful life.

< interlude - THE END

series masterlist // skzms masterlist // kofi

🔖 taglist: follow and turn on notifications for my library account: @skzms-library 🔞 I monitor ages over there, just like I used to do with my taglist. I will block minors and ageless blogs, and you'll have to message me again to get unblocked. so just have your age in your bio before you follow!

[allfryam]

feeder for president 2: mike’s story

This isn’t a direct sequel to feeder for president, but it takes place in the same universe, about a year after the law was implemented. We follow our protagonist Mike as he has to bid farewell to his abs because he turns 18 soon.

Mike awoke groggily and smacked his ringing alarm clock that sat on his nightstand. He slowly pulled off the covers and sat up. Still in his underwear, he walked sleepily to the kitchen to get some breakfast. A glass of orange juice and 3 scrambled eggs ought to do the trick. He yawned and scratched his lower abs. He had been going to the gym consistently for about a year now and you could tell. His rock hard abs were complemented by his thick, muscular arms and lean frame. It wasn’t easy having this body though. Ever since the lard law was put into place, gyms had been banned and healthy food was a thing of the past. Mike was smart enough to keep some old weights and dumbbells hidden in his garage so he could still keep his nice figure. That was all going to change soon though. His birthday was in a couple months and the second he turned 18, he would have to throw this healthy lifestyle out the window.

Mike had a plan though. He was going to try to eat as healthy as possible and continue working out even after he turned 18. He figured he would just have to gain 25 pounds of muscle instead of fat. How hard could it be?

well, it was finally here. Mike awoke like any other day, but his throat was a little sore from the new implant they gave him last night. Instead of his usual small breakfast, Mike ate 6 eggs, sausage, and toast. He had downloaded a calorie tracker app to make sure he was eating enough. For breakfast, he ate about 1700 calories. Nice. He was on track to hit 5000 before the end of the day. He made himself a protein shake with about 500 calories and headed out to his garage. Still shirtless, he lifted weights and did various exercises for about an hour. His chilled frame was dripping with sweat by the time he was finished. It was the middle of July and the only air conditioning in his garage was a dinky box fan that hadn’t been turned off in years.

for lunch, Mike met up with his friend Hayden at a local diner. Hayden used to have a similar frame to Mike, but Hayden turned 18 back in April, and as you may expect, his abs were a thing of the past. “Nice gut, dude.” Mike teased. Hayden didn’t really seem to mind. Most people had come to terms with the new law, and being bigger was the new fashion standard. “I think I’m gonna shoot to gain 35 pounds instead of 25 this year. The extra thousand bucks would be sweet!” Hayden said, breaking the silence. “Those extra fat rolls will be pretty sweet too huh?” Mike said sarcastically. Hayden just rolled his eyes.

when lunch finally arrived, Mike was starving. He ordered the double cheeseburger and fries with a large sweet tea. 1200 calories. A bit less than lunch but he would be up to 3400 for the day after this meal. Hayden ordered a personal pizza, a basket of loaded tater tots, buffalo chicken dip, and a large chocolate milkshake. “Jeez dude. You’re really gonna eat all that?” Mike commented. “If I’m gonna get this extra cash, I need to start eating more. I’m only up 10 pounds since April.” Hayden replied. “This meal should actually already put me over the 5000 calorie minimum for the day. I had a pretty big breakfast.”

by the end of his first day being an adult, Mike had eaten 5300 calories. He could have eaten more but he didn’t want to overeat like Hayden. He was gonna turn himself into a fat slob eating like that. Mike was gonna stay perfectly fit. This stupid law wouldn’t affect him at all.

“Damnit.” Mike whispered to himself, looking in the mirror. It had been about a month since he turned 18, and he was struggling to keep up with his healthy lifestyle. Eating 5000 calories a day was slowly catching up to Mike. He pinched the small belly that was forming on him. If he flexed, his abs were still visible, and you could hardly tell he had gained any weight unless he took his shirt off, but Mike was devastated. He had abs almost his entire life, and just like that, they were gone. Mike didn’t have time to sulk in the bathroom though. He had to finish packing for college so he could move out tomorrow. He and Hayden were going to be roommates and Mike was excited.

the boys first week at school was rough. Well, for Mike. Hayden was having the time of his life. The unlimited food plan meant he could practically live in the dining hall. Hayden had gotten even fatter since Mike had last seen him and Hayden didn’t seem to care. “Look around dude. Everyone has at least a little bit of a belly. You’re like the only skinny one.” Hayden said between mouthfuls of pizza. Mike hated to admit it but Hayden was right. Looking around the dining hall, there was a guy in a Spider-Man shirt that looked like it was two sizes too small, a guy that had pulled his shirt up to rub his bloated gut, a tall guy that had unbuttoned his jeans to give his belly room to grow, and even a guy with no shirt at all. He had his round gut on full display and no one seemed to care. Was it really better to just let yourself go like that? Mike pondered as he ate his burrito.

Mike decided to listen to Hayden and try out this weight gain thing. It was already happening to him slowly, why not speed it up? He spent the whole day eating whatever he wanted, not caring about his body at all. And to his surprise, it felt incredible! Eating stress free was the best thing he’s ever done! Tallying his calories at the end of the day, Mike discovered he ate over 7000 calories! He didn’t care though. If he was gonna be forced to gain weight, why not have fun while doing it?

over the next few weeks, Mike and Hayden continued to grow. They would eat constantly. One day they decided to camp out in the dining hall and eat all day. They got there bright and early at 6 AM when they opened and ordered a huge breakfast. Waffles, pancakes, French toast, eggs, bacon, sausage, hash browns, and more. They scarfed it down and rubbed their bellies while talking to each other. “Looks like Mr. Perfect is starting to fall apart.” Hayden teased, poking the sliver of belly poking out from Mike’s shirt. Mike blushed and pulled his shirt back down. “Shut up.” Mike huffed. They continued to chitchat for a few more hours until they were both hungry enough for lunch. Burgers, fries, pizza, tacos, chips, cookies, chicken, and various other meals were brought back to the table and munched on as the boys continued to talk. Two 18 year olds stuffing their faces with fattening food would be considered odd or inappropriate a few years back, but with the new law, it was completely normal. Everyone in the dining hall was trying to eat loads of food. Everyone’s clothes were a bit to tight. Everyone’s belly was a bit bloated. It was great. People weren’t judged for their bodies anymore.

around 6 or seven, the boys decided they had finally recovered from their massive lunch, they decided to grab dinner. They went all out this time, getting crabs, fish, pasta, rice, subs, shrimp, quesadillas, and more. Mike’s belly was barely fitting under his shirt, and his pants were super tight. Hayden had completely taken his shirt off, opting to let his expanding belly breathe. By the end of dinner the boys were stuffed beyond belief. They leaned back in their chairs, rubbing their bloated bellies, trying to stifle their massive burps.

“Dude! It’s already 8:45!” Hayden said about an hour later. “Yeah. So what?” Mike asked. “The dining hall closes at nine! We need to get dessert before they close!” The bloated boys rushed back to the food area to find some desserts. To their surprise, most of the staff gave them extra so they wouldn’t have to throw it out at the end of the night. They arrived back at their table with an entire cheesecake, 3 slices of chocolate cake, a plate full of various cookies, lots of pastries, and a huge sundae they had created with the rest of the I e cream and toppings. They started with that so they could eat it before it melted. It was vanilla ice cream with whipped cream, cookie dough, hot fudge, Oreos, caramel, and a cherry on top. They tore through it quickly and moved on to the mountain of other dessert. By the time they were finished, the boys were exhausted. Hayden had eaten so much, his bloated belly was touching the table. They headed back to their dorm and passed out with their bloated bellies grumbling in pain.

let me know if you guys would like a part two to this story. I really enjoyed writing about these two, and they quickly became one of my favorite characters. I know posts have been slow lately but I’ve been focusing on myself and I have officially started gaining! I started about a month ago and I’m up 5 pounds. It’s been slow but I’m having a really great time. If anyone has any tips please leave them in the comments.

[kakiastro]

Lunar Return-Your month ahead

Solar return is talked about a lot but did you know that you have a Lunar return too?

What the difference?

Solar- when the Sun orbits back into the sign & date you were born in, Aka, your birthday. Solar returns happen every year. It shows the outlook of your year ahead until your next birthday comes.

Lunar - when the Moon orbits back into the sign you were born in. Instead of a yearly analysis like the solar, this will be a monthly analysis. Every 29ish days, you have a new lunar return chart.

How do I read my lunar return chart?

- The same you would any other chart but you have to read it from a moon point of a view.

-the Moon rules over our private and home life. It rules over our family and other loved ones. It rules over our emotional needs and wants. It’s our most intimate and safe space from the outside world.

*THIS DOES NOT CHANGE YOUR NATAL CHART! Your natal chart will always be the same forever. Return charts are to show the themes of our lives. I just wanted to make that clear.

The breakdown of the chart

For example: Scorpio rising

South/North Nodes- this is important because this shows you what you learned from the previous month and early on in this month (SN) to what you want to learn at the end of this month(NN). SN Taurus 7h /NN Scorpio 1h, this shows the you learned how to connect with people in a surface level and the material side of relationships. Now you you’re learning about how you emotionally connect with others but you’re looking deep within yourself first. “What do I need to feel intimacy on a deeper level”

Ascendant & Chart ruler - overall outlook for the month and what the theme is. Let’s say you have a Scorpio rising with ruler Pluto Capricorn in the 3h for this month. Themes of power, money topics such as loans and debts, sex, intellectual and emotional bonds, research, grandparents/elders, career, siblings, cars related topics, short travel and your local neighborhood will be the main topics

Moon- since this is a Lunar chart, the moon is the first planet after the chart ruler that we should be looking at. The moon sign will always be the same as your natal moon, hence “lunar return” the house the moon falls in is the most important. If you have a Libra moon, it would be in your 12h for this month. So you may feel like going into hermit mode, being more creative, traveling to a foreign unknown land or territory, if you’re interested in spirituality or holistic, traveling to the beach or being near water, going to the hospital, prison visit(hey, you never know)

Sun- this will be the not so private part of our lives out in the open. The Sun is the one that highlights everything in our life. It’s our life force. Let’s say the Sun is in Gemini 8h. This really enhanced the Scorpio energy so reread those themes that I wrote above now add the Gemini energy. This may be the month a lot of secrets or just deeply hidden emotions boil over to the surface. It’s giving death and rebirth season

Mercury-this will show your daily routine(s) throughout the month. It’s your health and possible health concerns, what you’ll be mostly thinking, talking about throughout this month. It also rules over your pets. If Mercury is in Gemini 8h along with the Sun then this could be time you really talk about your fears, worries, trauma, your healing growth journey, money problems or blessings, you may change something drastic about your routine, getting 2 new pets or giving one away, your hands such as breaking a nail or finger, getting new rings .

Venus- this will show you what your relationship(s), finances, your physical home and your personal possessions in it, food habits . Let’s say you have a Venus Virgo 11h. Posting a life update on social media, changing up your diet, you could be more vocal about your struggles or just struggles in general on social media, being of service and helping strangers more this month

Mars- this will show you where you’re putting your most energy in this month. Mars rules over our physical body and what get us up and moving. Mars is in Aries 6h for this month, yore putting a lot of your energy into yourself, your health, your job, your pets,it’s all about healing you this month, keep in mind too mars is also your chart ruler because it also rules Scorpio.

Jupiter- this will show you where you’re doing too much lol jk..sort of😅 this can show you where in will be expanded upon, your faith, what you’ll learn, your ideals, long distance travels, court case(if you have one), your good luck for this month. Jupiter Aries 6h with Mars, remember when I said you’ll be focused on you lol, oh with Jupiter, it’s even more intense and heightened

Saturn-this will show the sucky but rewarding parts of the month. Saturn is always trying to teach us some lessons which is never fun. However, if you applied what you know then this is growth which is the goal right? Saturn in Pisces 5h, getting serious about your creativity projects, expressing yourself in a more fluid but serious. You know you could express more of your subconscious thoughts to others

Uranus-the shocking and I didn’t see that coming moments for the month. Where you will want to progress. Uranus Taurus 7h, you may have a different outlook on relationships, meeting someone unexpectedly, unexpected money or buying something you didn’t think you would where.

Neptune- your subconscious thoughts for the month, only you will see this side of you. Neptune Pisces 5h, diving into unknown territory with dating, your dreams, new locations.

Pluto- transformations that we go through this month. Saturn is the hard but rewarding lessons while Pluto is the lessons that damn near breaks us and put us in a fetal position while crying with a blanket over our head, but he transforms us(up to us if it makes a good or bad one). Our fears and traumas live here so it’s not easy to go through. I don’t need to put an example here since it’s our chart ruler.

If you want to see how this plays out, keep a journal and just document the important parts that resonate with you that month. Then go back and look at your lunar chart and start connecting the dots. I would recommend to look at your lunar chart at the beginning of the month then relook at the end to see the storyline of that month in the chart. I’ll bet you 5$ you’ll be blown away!

I’m open for readings!

[rebeccathenaturalist]

Today I present to you not one but TWO examples of selfish people who keep treating wildlife like pets. The first shows the consequences of their actions; the second is a tragedy waiting to happen once that deer becomes aggressive and that poor kid ends up injured or worse, or the deer has to be euthanized.

The proliferation of "cute wildlife" pictures and videos showing people in very close contact with wildlife has led to the expectation on the part of many people that they, too, can get their Disney moment as a "wildlife whisperer". Unfortunately this leads to more people trying to force contact with wildlife on their own terms with no care for the impact on the animal or their own safety.

While habituated wild animals are generally more tolerant of human contact, they are absolutely NOT domesticated. Domestication is a long process that leads to significant physical and mental changes in a lineage of animals until they are a separate subspecies/species from their wild progenitors; a dog is not a wolf, a domesticated cat is not an African wildcat, a cow is not an aurochs, and so forth. A wild animal may be tamed to a certain extent, but it is still fundamentally wild and has wild instincts and behaviors.

They do not have a desire to be around humans bred into them the way domestic species do, and any habituation is at their own expense. Habituated animals often do not learn proper foraging or hunting skills, particularly if they were raised by habituated parents, they don't get to socialize with their own species and are less likely to successfully reproduce, which can affect the local population's gene pool, and they are more likely to be injured or killed when they come into conflict with humans due to their lack of fear of us.

The absolute selfishness that leads people to want to force wildlife to tolerate them for their own ego boost robs these animals of their autonomy and wild lives. And it is selfishness; we do this because WE want the animals to like us and entertain us, not because we care about their long-term well-being. Those who actually care about a wild animal's quality of life look at the negative impacts of feeding them improper food, habituating them to humans, and interrupting their life's progression in the name of our own agendas. This is why good, ethical wildlife rehabs are as hands-off with their patients as possible, so that they minimize the chances of habituation and maximize the animal's wild instincts and behaviors for a more successful return to the wild.

It's not enough to choose to not feed or pet wildlife; we also have to criticize "rehabs" and "zoos" that make their money on up-close-and-personal direct physical encounters with wild animals, rehabbers that take pictures and videos of them cuddling with animals in their care (or any other contact outside of immediate medical/feeding support), and influencers who get clicks, likes, and shares by getting footage of them too close to wildlife. We also need to call out those "Oh, how cute!" pictures, posts, and news articles showing how humans and wildlife can be "friends", and keep educating people on how habituation is dangerous both to the animals and humans alike.

[reality-detective]

It's going to be biblical 👇

The only conclusion here is: AMERICA....REPENT!

Think the coming eclipse is nothing? I did, too, until I discovered all these FACTS!

I don't claim to know what all of this means, exactly, but I believe it's important enough for all of us to be aware that this is happening and pray for wisdom.

On April 8th, 2024, there will be an eclipse. One eclipse is already amazing but this one is actually the last in a 3-part series that has SO much meaning behind it. It is important that we recognize that God said that He would use the sun, moon and stars to communicate with us:

Genesis 1:14- "Then God said, 'Let there be lights in the expanse of the heavens to separate the day from the night, and let them be for signs and for seasons and for days and years..."

Luke 21:25 - "There will be signs in the sun, moon and stars. On the earth, nations will be in anguish and perplexity at the roaring and tossing of the sea."

So now we know that God said that He would use the sun, moon and stars to communicate with us, so let's break down this 3-part eclipse series:

1) With the path of this last eclipse, combined with the first 2 eclipses (one in 2017 and the other in 2023), it will create the Hebrew letter over America that is "Aleph Tav" and in Greek it is the "Alpha and Omega" - both means "The beginning and the end." God said in Revelation 21:6 that He is the beginning and the end and this Aleph Tav is like His signature. Why would He use an eclipse to put His signature over America? Let's dig deeper:

2) God has used eclipses to warn nations of coming judgement so that the nation can repent of their sinful ways and come back to Him. This happened with the story of Ninevah. God told Jonah to go to the wicked nation of Ninevah and warn them about coming judgement. Jonah ran away from the assignment and while out at sea got swallowed up by a huge fish and was in its belly for 3 days. Jonah repented of running away so the whale spit him up. He then went to Ninevah and warned the people but there was something that also happened while he was warning the people...an eclipse came over the land.

In the 19th century, ancient tablets were discovered that described an eclipse called the Bur-Sagale eclipse where the totality of the eclipse landed right over Ninevah while Jonah was there preaching of the 40 day warning before the coming destruction. Because of this, the people realized that this was a sign from God that what Jonah was saying was true and they repented and God spared their nation.

It is amazing how much America mirrors Ninevah. (If you don't see it, you may be part of the problem.) To make this even more clear, this last eclipse on April 8th will be going over 7 cities here in America called - yep you guessed it - NINEVAH! I honestly didn't even know that we had any city here in the U.S. named that but here we are - with this eclipse going over these cities (and there will be an 8th one that it goes over also called Ninevah in Canada.)

Here are the cities: 👇

Nineveh, Texas

Nineveh, Missouri

Nineveh, Indiana (this will be the highest magnitude of eclipse Mag 1.023, the local time predicted for it to occur is at 3:07 PM)

Nineveh, Ohio

Nineveh, Pennsylvania

Nineveh, Virginia

Nineveh, New York

Nineveh, Nova Scotia (Not in the US)

Could this be that God is warning us just as He warned Ninevah? There have been many "Jonahs" in the past few years warning the nation that we need to repent and add in this sign above our heads - we can't turn away from the fact that it is not a coincidence. But if you need more proof, let's keep going...

The first part of this 3 part eclipse series was in 2017. The path of that eclipse went over 7 cities named Salem, which is short for Jerusalem (Ps. 76).

Salem, Oregon

Salem, Idaho

Salem, Wyoming

Salem, Nebraska

Salem, Missouri

Salem, Kentucky

Salem, South Carolina

The mathematical "chances" of there being 7 Salem's with the first eclipse and then 7 Ninevah's for the 3rd eclipse is unthinkable. But what about the 2nd part of the eclipse?

4) Perhaps the most striking piece of the 2nd eclipse is that the precise center-line of eclipse path exits the USA directly over Corpus Christi. Corpus Christi means the "Body of Christ" and is one of the only towns named that in the world!

But let's go back to this upcoming eclipse and dig even deeper...

4) Jonah was giving a 40 day warning to Ninevah during the eclipse. If you look at our April 8th eclipse and fast forward 40 days then you will get to May 18, 2024 - the day before Pentecost. The history of Pentecost is that is the last Spring Feast that the Lord has given us (there are 4 in the Spring and 3 in the Fall). This is the day that the Lord sent the Holy Spirit down to all those who have accepted Christ. We are told that the "Restrainer" (many believe this is the Holy Spirit) will be removed before the Tribulation could it be that this is a warning for that? I'm not sure as that is a worldwide event and this eclipse will be just over North America but it is something definitely to think and pray about for more clarity and wisdom. No matter what, there are too many things lining up for it to not be nothing and so my job is to get the information out to you all so that you can at least be aware of these signs that God is giving us so that you can pray about it.

But let's keep going...

5) From the start of this 3 part eclipse to the end, it will be 7 years. God uses numbers a lot to communicate with us, and 7 has a ton of meaning. A few examples are - He created the world in 7 days, there will be a 7 year tribulation, 7 is used for completion, etc.

) Going back to how this correlates with Jonah & Ninevah's story -at the time of this eclipse, there will be another sign in the sky...it will take place under the constellation, Cetus, which is the whale constellation! And not only will it pass through the 8 cities in North America named Ninevah, it will also pass through Jonah, Texas! Speaking of other towns that it will pass through, these are some of the other city names that it will go right over:

Rapture, Indiana

Williamston, Kentucky - this is where the Ark Encounter is located. The Ark Encounter is a full size replica of Noah's Ark.

Eagle Pass, Texas - where we are having so many border issues.

And the point where it crosses the 2017 eclipse to mark the center of the X is an area in southern Illinois called Little Egypt. What is even more fascinating about this is that Little Egypt is sandwiched in between 2 other cities called Alpha, Kentucky and Omega, Illinois - both having the 2017 eclipse come over their cities. Furthermore, the intersection of the 2017 and 2024 solar eclipses occurs directly over the New Madrid Fault Line, a major seismic zone. An earthquake along this fault line could potentially destroy the U.S., making it one of the most perilous fault lines in the country. I have no idea if this will happen or not, but there are too many things here that are all literally lining up to not share with everyone.

7) One more interesting fact is that there are 2,422 days in between the 2017 eclipse and the 2024 eclipse. If you look up 2422 in Strong's Concordance, an Bible concordance that has every word of the KJV, takes us to Exodus 1:19 which says,

"The midwives answered Pharaoh, "Hebrew women are not like Egyptian women; they are vigorous and give birth before the midwives arrive."

Why would this be of any significance? Well, to me, it reminds me of how Jesus said that His return would be like a woman in labor with the signs of His coming growing stronger and closer together. We are at a point in history where we are seeing all of the signs that He gave us happening before our eyes. In fact, we are even seeing things that will happen during the tribulation get setup now. If we are seeing those things being setup now, that must mean that we are super close to it actually happening. Going back to God saying that He uses the sun, moon and stars to show us signs - and then Jesus saying that the signs of His coming will be like a woman in labor, well this information leading us back to Exodus 1:19 explaining that the Hebrew women have labor fast is so interesting to me! Could we be on the brink of the rapture and tribulation!? I don't know exactly when it will happen but Jesus did tell us that we would know the season and I do believe that we have been in that season for the past few years and are pushing closer and closer to it!

It is no secret that this world has gone mad and everyone knows that there is something happening behind the scenes that feels really uncomfortable. If you have that feeling, you are right! There is a major push for things to happen that were predicted to happen over 2,000 years ago. Most people seek their understanding in the wrong place though. They look to the news and the world to guide them; however, these sources will only bring more questions, not answers. It causes people to live in fear, anxiety and depression. However, Jesus didn't want us to live that way. He gave us the information so that we would know what is happening when we see these things. The first piece of living in His knowledge is accepting that God sent His son, Jesus, to die for our sins and on the 3rd day, Jesus rose from the grave and conquered death. The second piece is to repent to God of your sins and turn away from your sins. Most churches only teach how God loves you but don't teach repentance anymore and that is a HUGE part of your faith. Jesus said that there will be many who come to Him and say, "Lord, Lord, I knew you." But because they didn't repent of their sins and seek Jesus' ways instead of their own, He will reply, "Get away from me, I never knew you." We cannot just live however we want without any consequences. Even little children understand this concept, but it has been lost on most adults. This is why Ninevah was going to see destruction - because they were a self- serving, sinful nation - just like America is today. You can't change the heart of this nation, but you can change your heart and lead your homes to do the same. Third, pray for wisdom in these areas.

I know this has been incredibly deep but just like Proverbs 25:2 says, "It is the glory of God to conceal a thing, but the honor of kings is to search out a matter." This sign in the sky will be right over your head in just a few weeks - will you have the eyes to see what it really means?"

You Decide 🤔

[an--artistic--autistic]

i am unreasonably proud and excited about this

[charminglyantiquated]

Nautilus update! I’ve written more in-depth about all of this on the gofundme page and our social media, so I won’t get into the nitty gritty detail here as well, but I wanted to share the news here, for anyone wondering how things are going! Under a cut because it’s long, but tl:dr is we're moving forward, and we'll be okay.

Good news first: The owner of another local sailing company had put one of their boats up for sale the same week as the accident, and after the surveyors told us to expect the worst, he got in touch. She’s now ours, and we’ll be sailing again next summer! We were lucky enough to work on her in the past, and her previous owner wanted has told us he’d initially meant to offer her to us at the end of this season. With a working boat, we can keep our company going, which in turn means we have a means of making money that still allows us the flexibility to work on repairs, and deal with matters in the shipyard as they arise. (The marina also had a multi-year wait for commercial boats, so we were worried about what would happen if we had to bow out for a few years!) We're extraordinarily lucky and so, so grateful - this literally would not have been possible without the fundraiser, and the safety net it gave us, and the way our whole community has supported us. Without exaggeration, it changed our lives. I will never be able to fully express how grateful I am.

Nautilus is written off as a loss, which we've been expecting. They offered us the chance to buy her as salvage, which we obviously accepted. So insurance wrote us a payout for what she’s insured for, plus reimbursement for getting her hauled and towed, less the value of her as salvage. Because she’s a loss, we have to pay off the loan that we took out this spring to buy her. After that's done, we'll have enough left over from the payout check to launch the new boat next spring (insurance/marina fees/haul and tow) which in turn leaves us free to use the proceeds of the fundraiser to make a start on repairs this winter! In the meantime our insurance is pursuing subrogation: essentially (as I understand it) after paying us out of their pocket, they are going after the other insurance for reimbursement. If we do see any lost income, it would be through this process, but we’ve been told several times it will take months - we don’t know if that means ‘december’ or ‘next august’, and don’t know how much, so we’re crossing our fingers but not making any plans around it. The crisis point was these last two months, and honestly the fundraiser got us through it - now we have our feet under us again, it would definitely be welcome but our stability and livelihood isn't hanging on it, so we can afford to wait.

Repairs - rough estimate from the survey is $83k, but half of that is labor costs. We can do much of the labor ourselves, which should lower it a bit. There are obviously areas where we'll need experts (welding!!), but we have the skills for a lot of what has to be done. Right now we’re getting the boats covered for cold weather, picking up some odd jobs around the shipyard, and clearing room in the woodshop to build a new main mast - that’s the project this winter! We are also going to start tearing up the teak deck to access the damaged fiberglass below, and figure out what, if anything, can be salvaged from the wreck of the mast/rigging (the jib furler sheared in half, but the sail itself made it out with only four small, easily patched punctures! Which is frankly a miracle, given how it was literally jammed through the mast). Anything that seems sound will be checked over by an expert, and a lot of it might still be too stressed to safely use, but after months of looking at the wreck of the thing, it’s honestly just a relief to be able to go through and start taking pieces apart.

Tl:dr is we’re going to be okay. Money is tight, we’re living with family and working 6 days a week, but we’ll be on the water sailing again in May, our company will survive, and we’re hoping to have Nautilus fixed in two or three years. Just wanted to share that with you all; I'm really glad to finally have some good news to offer. It's not easy but it's better, and we're going to get through it, pretty much 100% because of everyone who has been so kind to us both. Thank you all so, so much for every single kind word and share and donation. I am never going to be able to say how much it has meant to me, and what a difference it has made. I won’t be posting much more about it on here now that we're back on our feet, but if anyone wants to keep updated, detailed news about Nautilus repairs will go on the gofundme page, and our instagram will have lighter posts about both boats, repairs, and the 2025 season.

[odiesdayoff]

Kinktober: Tommy Shelby

Pair: Thomas Shelby x fem!reader

Summary: Your parents can no longer afford the protection of the Peaky Blinders. Tommy can't just let that slide.

Warnings: Boot worship?

this may be unfinished, but the whole point of my kinktober is to finish the wips I've had for so long. Enjoy and lmk if you want more.

Shelves of assorted pill bottles and prescriptions sat behind you. Across the counter, an older woman counted her coins for an extra canister of film and finally slid the sum over to you. Only a few other patrons wandered around the pharmacy. While it was your parent’s business, you found yourself running it more often than they did.

“Enjoy your day, ma’am.” You watched the old woman walk out of the store. A tall man held open the door for her to leave. He wore the all-too familiar cap of the Peaky Blinders, along with the winter coat style that many of them shared.

You tried to hide your indifference, and slight fear. You stayed out of the way of those men as much as you could, but anyone in Birmingham had at least one encounter a week with them. The man casually walked up to the counter and his eyes met yours. Arthur Shelby, not the worst person to see, but certainly not the best. 

“Mornin’ Darling. Are your parents here?” He wanted to be somewhat charming and intimidating, which definitely worked in his favor. Maybe if you weren’t aware of who he was and his reputation, you wouldn’t feel a familiar chill down your spine. 

You shook your head. “M’sorry, Sir. They went out to the next town over. Is everything okay?” A part of you knew that something was wrong. The Peaky Blinders only came around when it was time to collect their monthly protection fees from every local business. For all that you knew, your parents had never missed a payment. 

He leaned over the counter to get closer to you. “We haven’t received your payment. You do realize if you don’t pay, we can’t promise what’ll happen to this quaint little pharmacy.”

“My dad handles the payments. I didn’t know we were behind.” Business had been extremely slow lately. You could only assume that your parents were out of town to try and get the money they owed to the gang. “Could you give us until the end of the week? At least until they get back? I’m sure it’s just a misunderstanding, you know we’re good on our word.”

Arthur thought for a moment, hopefully considering your words. “Two days. That’s all I can give you.”

You smiled. “Thank you. You’ll get the money and with interest.”

He nodded towards you and put his hat back on his head. “I know you will. You’re a good girl, yeah?” He walked out of the store, leaving an invisible cloud of something menacing in his wake. 

You watched him leave. You’d never really had a direct encounter with one of them before. There was a sense of fear mixed with something you couldn’t really put your finger on. 

~~

You shouldn’t have made promises that you weren’t confident that you could keep. Your parents returned and you thoroughly explained the situation and deal you made with Arthur. They told you that they would take care of it. That you shouldn’t be speaking with any of those men. They made whores out of innocent girls like you. 

By the next Wednesday, you assumed that this whole issue was dealt with and over. You were unboxing new shipments behind the counter and organizing the shelves when your theory was proven extremely wrong. Your parents were fixing the display at the front of the door. They noticed the group of Peaky Blinders before you did.

The front door opened, the bell signaling a new customer. If their angry stances didn’t give who they were away, their hats did. Two of them grabbed your parents and made them face the one with the undercut and a cigarette hanging from his lips. You knew that this was Tommy Shelby, leader of the gang. 

“Y’know we can’t let one person off the hook for a missed payment. Then we won’t be taken seriously, will we?” It was a rhetorical question, everyone knew the answer to that. Your parents keep struggling under the grasp of the men who held them with no success or escape. 

 The customers in the shop quickly fled through the front doors, making sure that they were out of harm's way from the gang and whatever they had planned for your parents. You stayed low to the ground, clutching the box of behind-the-counter medications in front of you.

“Your rates went up. Business isn’t like it used to be. We can’t afford it anymore.” Your father pleaded.

“We’re decent men. We understand the financial burden. We can always take some collateral until business starts booming again.” A new voice, one you remembered to be Arthur's, spoke up. “What about that daughter of yours?”

You perked up at the mention of your existence. “No. She’s out of the question.”

None of the men replied. Suddenly, your father’s grunts of pain followed the sounds of someone hitting him. It kept going. You shut your eyes. Your mother screamed for them to stop.

Ignoring the protests from your own body and brain, you stood up. “Leave him alone!”

Their heads turned to you. It was then that you realized it might’ve been a mistake. “And who might you be, girl? Some kind of hero?” Tommy’s blue eyes pierced into you.

Arthur grinned at the sight of you. “That’s sweet, little Y/n. Their daughter.”

“Y/n, run!” Your father struggled against the men, screaming as loud as he possibly could.

Like a deer in headlights, you stood still. Your brain screamed for you to run, but your body locked into the position you were in. “Y/n, stay.” Tommy commanded you in a mocking way. He almost sauntered over to the counter and let himself through the small gate so that he was right next to you. “Look at that, she knows who she belongs to already.”

“Mr. Shelby, I have money saved up. I can cover the cost. Just please, don’t hurt my parents.” Your voice was slightly over the volume of a whisper. Begging and pleading in front of a man like him was something people near death only got to experience. You hoped it wasn’t at that point.

He clicked his tongue. “I don’t want your money anymore, darling. I need your parents to remember what happens when they cross the Peaky Blinders.” He leaned close to you, enough that you could feel his breath against your skin. It gave you goosebumps. “If you’re good, you might enjoy this a little too much for a punishment.”

His hand trailed to your lower back as he guided you into the storage room. Once he closed the door behind the both of you, the courage to talk returned. “What are you going to do with me?”

He laughed and lit a cigarette, blowing the smoke in your direction. “Nothing at all.”

You raised a brow. “Nothing?”

“Don’t sound disappointed, love. I may be a criminal, but I’m no monster.” Another puff of smoke. The stinging scent of tobacco invades your senses. He quirks a brow. “Unless that’s what you want.”

You shook your head, a little hesitant. “Of course not. But…why?”

He stifles a laugh at your apparent eagerness. "Fucking me is a privilege, not a punishment." He blows the smoke away yet again.

Taking a step closer to him, you cock your head to the side in curiosity. "And...I haven't earned that privilege?" You couldn't sound more desperate to jump his bones if you tried. If only your parents heard you. How ashamed they must be.

Maybe it was true about the Shelby men. They didn't even try and had women fawning at their feet for a chance to touch them. Or vice versa. You were no exception to this phenomenon. "No, not yet. If you want me so badly, you must prove yourself."

He dropped the cigarette, put it out with his boot, and it singed the floor. It was as if the idea popped in his head right then. "Grind on my boot. Make yourself come."

You looked down to see his boot, the reflection from a somewhat recent shining making you see your pathetic expression looking back at you.

This was necessary if there was any chance of him touching you at all. You fell to your knees and crawled to sit on his boot. "Eyes up here." He called, making you keep eye contact as you started to slowly grind against his shoe, the friction barely stimulating your clit at this point. You weren't sure if coming was even possible this way.

"That's it, wet by boot. Filthy slut." He carefully lifted the tip of his boot against you, pulling a quiet moan from your lips.

You must've looked silly, grinding your core over his boot while your parents were probably getting beaten just in another room. How could he have such an influence on you?

Still, you ground against him, chasing your high on his boot.

[p1nkshield]

Hi 👋 This is chapter four of the Estranged Uncle Au!

Just a warning there is mentions of cults and a scene that has Damian being Damian (AKA knife child) Please take care of yourselves! I hope you enjoy!

Clark was sweating buckets.

“I promise you I’m not in danger! This is all a big misunderstanding! Bruce isn’t even that creepy!”

Jazz rattled off several reasons.

“He has a cloyingly sweet public persona, his personal computer has extensive information on all of the local rogues in the area and all the adopted sons we’ve met look practically identical to both each other and you and Danny! Not to mention they all seem trained for combat! How is that not creepy?”

Okay from an impartial standpoint Clark could see how it looked like he was tied up in a cult.

“I swear if another fruitloop billionaire obsessed with one of my family members tries to adopt me I’m gonna wail!”

How specific!

“Wail?” Clark began to ask but was cut off.

“Are you tied up in a cult Clark? Because we can get you out if you are! I … uh know a guy who specializes in taking down cults.”

What?

“I promise you I’m not in a cult! The blue eyes and black hair is a coincidence and I am not in danger! Also what do you mean you know a guy who specializes in taking down cults!?!”

Danny squinted.

“Hold that thought. Everyone stop talking!”

Danny reached towards Clark’s shoulder and picked out a small device, no bigger than a grain of rice out of his cable knit sweater.

“No one who plants listening devices into sweaters isn’t creepy.”

He then promptly threw it to the ground and crushed it with his heel.

“That’s the end of the recording.” Tim said while cringing.

“Sleazy?!? Me? Sleazy? I did a back handspring on hardwood floors for them and they call me sleazy?!”

Dick thought that he could win them over. Was he too heavy handed?

“It’s probably because you fell asleep in the pico de gallo timber.” Jason joked as he inspected the weapons vault.

“What? Me?!? I was the only one who made any headway! I was just up late trying to track whoever was hacking us!” Tim defended.

“Well good news! You found ‘em! Let me know when they hack my library account seeing as the Big bad bat computer is being hacked by a couple teens.” Jason said dismissively as he took a flamethrower fuel canister.

Bruce was experiencing a new amalgamation of emotions. He was both incredibly embarrassed, incredibly amused and incredibly impressed.

How embarrassing that the bat computer was hacked! He put so much effort into the protection of his data!

But then again Clark must be beside himself trying to convince them he wasn’t in a cult and that was incredibly amusing. He even said all the things that people said when they were in denial about being in a cult!

This was absurd! The only way to describe this was absurd!

“Fools! All of you do not truly understand the gravitas of the situation! If they believe that we are indeed weapons dealers they may snoop further and compromise all of our secret identities!” Damian huffed his way into the view of his family.

“We’ll be alright Dami, Tim is reinforcing our defenses for the computer and we’re going to try and disengage for a while. If we keep on trying we might make it worse.” Dick ruffled through Damian’s hair despite many protests.

Damian tutted at this suggestion. They needed to approach the problem head on and quickly rectify the situation lest it spiral into a larger one. Perhaps if they suffered an accident.

“Damian! I know that face! That’s the face you make when you go off and try to rectify the situation by yourself!”

“That is not true Grayson! I was simply thinking about confiding in my companion about how tedious my science project is.”

“You promise you’re only going to engage in age appropriate activities like science homework and book reports?”

“I promise.”

"I'm choosing to believe you" Dick began to walk away before pulling another sour face. "...Sleazy?"

Damian checked his hidden blades one final time before encroaching upon this Daniel Fenton who had foolishly entered an alleyway. He deftly held a knife to the throat of his target.

"If you continue to snoop into my father's business I will not hesitate to cut you down!"

Damian was expecting to me met with fear and copious apologies. He was a fearsome and terrifying warrior after all.

"Are you trying to hold me at knifepoint on your tippy-toes?" The target said in the same tone that one would use with a kitten trying to jump a bit too high. They should be focused on the clear danger Damian was posing. Or at least the danger he was posing. Between the moment Damian looked at his feet and the moment he looked back up to find a very unperturbed Danny.

"Did your father put you up to this?" He asked.

"No! I acted of my own accord!"

"Well are there anymore ineffective threats you want to say?"

Damian was about to say something when his stomach audibly growled. Curses! He could not bring a meal in order to maintain secrecy from Alfred! Damian slowly looked up towards Danny's face. He has that look that Grayson gets before he does something annoying like ruffle his hair.

"Are you hungry?"

Damian did not dignify this question with an answer and began to storm off.

"I'm having some friends over, we can spare you a plate! My friend Sam chose the menu though so its vegan."

Damian stopped in his tracks.

"What is it that you are making?"

"Cauliflower gnocchi with cashew cream pesto."

"And this is taking place in Clark's home?"

"yep."

"Fine. But I will not be lenient with you because you've offered me a meal!"

Danny laughed and texted Sam

"Hey get another bundle of basil Im bringing a guest"

[threepandas]

Bad End: Heroic Collection

New Haven wasn't a major metropolis. Some big city like Delhi or Tokyo, Jakarta and the like. It was big for the area. A major hub for commerce and crime on a local scale. But Nationally? INTERNATIONALLY? Not even close. No matter WHAT the great ambitions that haunted the Mayor, late at night, may tell you.

So, really, there was NO fucking reason for any A Listers to be here.

NONE.

Our biggest exports were fancy fucking jams and that one fashion line I couldn't pronounce. We had honest to God Jam festivals in the fall. It was a circuit, Mayor gave out awards. There were pies. Firestrike always ate himself sick. Agent always laughed at him. I... Fuck, my head was ringing. I'd hit that last building HARD. Was pretty sure I tasted blood. Not... not sure if that was because I busted something in my mouth or...

Over my comms, I could hear my teammates fighting. Trying to hail the Alliance. If we could... could just hold on...

Long enough for the major players to GET here?

Then what? I had to wonder. Staring at a burning bus in front of me. It was half way lodged through Mrs. Brahimi's shop. Please, God, let her and the workers have got out all right. I'd been there just this morning. She made me those stuffed flatbread things. Said I was still too skinny. Should rest more.

I use the twist remains of a book return to lever myself to my feet. Book..? Oh. I'm by the library. Which..? Fuck. Main one. That's city hall.

Smoke rises around the city I've lived in all my life. Fires everywhere. I'm supposed... supposed to be a hero. But I can barely stand. Feel sick as the world sways. My body is one big bruise. Gotta... gotta keep fighting. Helping. Save people.

In the distance, I can hear screams.

I'm coming. I promise. I'm coming!

I make my screaming body move. Stumble. Catch myself. Then keep going. The hiss and spit in my ear tells me that my communicator is probably half broken. I don't try it, in case that breaks it the rest of the way. Wrench doors from half crushed cars to free trapped civilians. Lever wreckage, hold it with trembling limbs, so people can crawl to safety. Run. Please, god, RUN!

We aren't strong enough.

He's here, The Collective.

A hivemind super threat. Alien supposedly. So far above my team's pay grade we know basically nothing. The kind of thing we were expected to never realistically see. We're nobody's. Fuck it, we're HAPPY being nobody's. It meant we got to go home each night. Didn't face The Horrors. Like him.

He CONSUMES.

Hungry. Trying to fill some void that's never going to fill. Supposedly a planet eater. Gutting worlds for resources, materials, to continue his own expansion. Now fixated on Earth for it's continued refusal to die. For its defiance. Some A+ sort of monster, to our high C rank. At best.

Fuck... we dealt with HUMANS. Fought gimmicks and tech. Little fish in our little pond. Now this tsunami was bringing the ocean to US and it was all we could do, to swim and survive.

I leaned against a half smashed car. Braced myself against it, more then anything, then started pulling pot shots. I... I was gonna black out soon. With a concussion like this? Probably wasn't gonna be waking up. Especially if those THINGS found me before a friendly did.

All across the city I called home, The Collective had Drones tearing the place apart.

They'd almost be pretty. Tall, elegant, androgynous lookin, supermodel twinks in battle armor. Drones apparently covered their lower face. I'd know the "commander" by their uncovered face and "use of adornments". Useful! Except they could fucking SWITCH on command, so you have to take out ALL of them.

Because they weren't a collection of different soldiers.

THEY weren't a THEY. That? Was a fucking HE. Singular.

You don't consider each of your individual cell as people. Each follicle of hair. Why would HE? God damn it. It was like fighting a giant. Against Gods. They just kept coming. And my ammo? Was not endless.

Worse. The drones had stopped looking. I don't know WHAT they had been searching for. But now? They started to converge on me. On city hall. Fuck. I... I couldn't even really stand anymore. My vision was blurring. I knew for a FACT my shots were shit. But dense as they were crowding? It seemed enough. Kept them back.

Three cartridges left.

Two.

Only one more...

The Alliance was coming. Half my team had gone silent. I could hear tears in the voice of Tech, back in the office. They had our life signs. Built into our armor. I could only imagine what mine looked like. Prayed, like I hadn't since I was a kid, that the others were just unconscious. Safe somewhere.

Someplace this nightmare couldn't reach them.

I doubted I was that lucky.

Tech was begging me to hold on. Giving me ETAs. And... And I was out of bullets. The block half full of Drones. I had escrima sticks. A fucking tazer. It would have to do. Sticks came out, as I swayed to my feet. No longer letting the car behind me hold my weight. What's a little... let's say, hundred or so, on one? Eh?

Bring your friends. Let's make it a fair fight.

I'll go easy on you.

Bravado until the end. Remember, never know who's watching. You are a symbol. Before you are a man, you are their HERO. Don't you DARE let them down. Even if you die. Especially when you die. B.. Bravado until the end. Plaste on a smirk and say a one-liner, we got hope to shoulder.

I took down about three Drones... I think... before the rest swarm me.

Feel hands pinning my arms. My torso. Everything. A weak point between the panels is ripped open. High grade military fabrics doing jack shit against their impossible strength. The distinct pinch tug of a needle in my skin. Cold spreading. The sudden exhaustion of a powerful sedative. I... am gone.

Time... is blurry.

Now and Then running together in my senses. My brain. The concussion doesn't help. Or... or didn't? It feels... gone? Gone-ing? Oh... look, sky. Clouds. Pretty. Wasn't I standing? I am standing. No... no being dragged. Chair? Not chair. Stairs? Carried. Pretty window..... where am I? Fuzzy. Bluzzy fuzzy purple beans~ he he he~ oh! Those are the... watch'ma call it! Gucci chairs! That rich lady had! Neat. Plurble.

Ouch! Why'd you pi...?

My mouth is dry as sand. But suddenly? I am hyper aware. The floating drift of my mind VIOLENTLY gone, replaced by alerted and focus. Drones surround me in a vaguely familiar hallway. Shit. I think it's that rich designer's place. My helmet is off, but my mask is still in place, thank god. The Drones stand far to close for my liking. Their many eyes, amused.

So glad to entertain, you Fuck.

I am frog marched down the hall. Damn near dragged. They were too smart to restrain me with my own cuffs, unfortunately. So my hands are bound behind my back with something tight I can't get a good feel off. Bastard secured it to my belt, too. Great.

The Collective's "Face" is surrounded by what must be every jewel in the city. Piled high in some vague sorting pattern I refuse to even try and comprehend. He's trying on rings. One on every finger, to see what matches his skin tone. Looks good. Already, he has a pearl stud and some earrings he's decided he likes. He looks up as I'm dragged in, and I realize immediately what one of "a few other differences" between him and the Drones are...

It's the EYES,

They GLOWED.

Metallic almost. Nearly neon. They reflected the light in a way the Drones simply did not. It made their face... horrificly predatory. Made for WATCHING, somehow. Unnerving and haughty. Beautiful still, but uncomfortable to be near.

Sitting up on a table that basicly swallows the room, dead center like a show piece on display, with one long leg tossed over the other and no fucking shirt on? The Face looks almost carefully, artfully, staged. To maximize some "haughty yet coy, alien prince who maybe wants to fuck you" shtick.

Does... Does he not realize I'm NOT one of the usual opponents? I mean. Flattered at the "join me! The Darkside has sex and cookies!" set up. Always fun. Classic, really. But, like? I would be... at BEST... a solidly MID goon.

Also "NO".

Gonna preemptively throw that out there. Maybe some expletives for flavor. Suggest someplace sunless to shove it. SOLID "No". Good try, though.

Around me, the Drones are shaking with silent laughter. Staring down at me, their pale eyes dancing with amusement. It's creepy as hell. Unnerving to be the center of attention like this. For this many eyes, utterly in synch, to surround and watch my every twitch. Act fascinated and amused, like I'm some little animal performing tricks.

The Face hasn't dropped his Seduction to the Darkside routine. If anything, he seems delighted by the defiance. Which... yeah, that tracks. It's why he's harrasing out planet to begin with. That one's definitely on me. So, better question? Not that I'm not glad and all? Why the FUCK am I not dead.

"And lose my HERO? Perish the thought~" drawles The Collective, the posture light and lazy, even as something dangerous threaded itself through their tone. It sounded... possessive. But that couldn't be right. "I would NEVER do such a thing! In fact, we are going to have to be far more careful with that little processor of yours. Far too fragile. Just the one, too. Horrifying, really."

Thanks. Just what every guy loves to really make 'im feels special. Insults.

Fucker.

More laughter from all around me. I grit my teeth. Come oooon, Alliance. Where the hell ARE you guys!? Could REALLY use a rescue! The hands holding me still are drifting. Fucking handsy. Damn near stroking even as they hold me immobile. They're looking for the clasps and buckles on my armor. Have already found the obvious ones. Fingers oh so casually drifting over, to grip, flex, and tear them apart.

I do NOT like how loose my armor is starting to feel. Barely able to hold on. Protect me. Limited as that protection may be. I think I'm developing a horrifying empathy for clams. Crustaceans in general. Anything that gets slowly pried from the safety of it's shell, too certain doom.

The Face casually tosses the rings he was playing with aside. Tens of thousands of dollars bouncing off to God only knows where. He slides from the table to stand. Shit. He's huge.

The androgynous twink supermodel thing he has going on? Fucking LIES. Twists your perception of how, EXACTLY, strong the Face body IS. He clears seven feet easily, is muscled in that distinctly "never see me coming until it's too late" sort of way all the ninja types are.

The tattoos. It's the FUCKING tattoos! They give the illusion that he's slimmer then he actually is.

It HIDES MUSCLE MASS.

I can't tell if that's vanity or strategy and I hate it. Glare as he sashays towards me. Hips rolling in that elegant catwalk strut. I'm forced to my knees. Because of course I am. How ELSE will the bastard loom and gloat? Though really, weak as I currently feel, it's more that the Drones holding me up? Stop doing that. My knees more or less just give up on their own.

"Like what you see? You're staring so intently~" He mocks. If he were being genuine, I'd call it teasing. Flirtatious. But I know better. "It IS a pretty body, isn't it? I worked hard on it, you know. All sort of fun little details~ Might honestly be one of my favorites. If you're good for me, I'll let you explore it~"

THERE it is.

Darkside. Sex and cookies. Sign up today. Fuck you and not in the fun way. Keep your hands to yourself, Collective. You're not convincing me. You could tell me the sky was blue, and I'd make three presentations with a PowerPoint, on why you were a liar. No, still No, and a hefty fuck off No for spice.

Three steps away. Two steps. One.

A man that tall and dangerous? Frankly did NOT need heels. Figures he'd wear them anyway. Sharp enough to kill a man. Right infront of my folded knees. I refuse to look up. No more fucking games. Did have to wonder, though, if those pants... if they even WERE pants? Were painted on or not. Very tight. Looked vaguely metal yet leather.

Shit.

Fingers, splayed wide as they run themselves through my sweaty and probably bloodstained hair. Couldn't have been nice to touch. Wrong angle and just a touch too big to be a Drone. Light as a lover, sweet almost, soothing. Before it inevitably tightens, gripping the strands. Honestly not as hard as I expected, didn't even hurt.

Still, my head is forced back.

Back and back and back, forced to arch my spine, hang awkwardly at some forty-five degree angle. My thighs and abs already screaming. A Drone grabs the back of my armor and, with an almost casual yank, my chest plate is violently snapped free. Both tossed to the floor away from us.

"There we are~" the Face hums down at me, eyes nearly hypnotic in how the light moved from within, grin full of sharp and deadly teeth. "No more of that ugly thing in the way. I much prefer this~"

"Tell me, Little Hero, do you remember? Becoming mine."

No, I certainly do fucking not. What the HELL is he-!? From behind the Face a Drone steps. Dressed differently to the others. Casual clothes. Like... actual street clothes. If they weren't GREEN I never would been able too-...

In horror, I watch as the pigment of the Drones skin melts away to a middling average. So utterly nondescript a blend of ethnicities that it's genuinely hard to place, but won't stand out no matter where he goes in the city.

I... I had seen that face.

SAVED that man.

Thought he was CUTE! T..Thought WE were having some sort of MEET CUTE! Oh God. That was at the festival. I was out of costume. Saved him from getting crushed. Then my teammates handled everything before I could slip away. So I just... stayed. Showed the cute tourist the festivities.

We ate FANCY JAMS, YOU FUCK!

I pined our that cute tourist for WEEKS. Was UNBEARABLE. Tech threatened to shove me off a roof! Oh my god.

Laughter.

Dozens of mouths, laughing in perfect sync. The noise layered and bouncing strangely around the room. Deeper then it should be, higher as it swings. Like a radio or voice modulator that someone is messing with. A momentary loss of control. My anger fizzles out to fear. Oh... oh yeah...

I forgot I was fucked.

At.. at least I know why?

A step forward. Past too close and now basically in my lap. A foot on either side of my knees. I try not to think exactly where my face would be pressed if I wasn't dragged back, to hang near painfully arched, so he could lean down and I could be forced to make eye contact. That way lay madness.

He moved his other hand to my face, cupping it. Dragging his thumb possessively across my mouth. He hummed, pleased.

He pressed closer, sliding down my front to his knees, straddling my lap. REALLY hoped that WAS, in fact, a weapon in your pocket there, buddy. Because I am not liking the handsy direction this is going, nor have I come to terms with my meet cute being a monstrous planet killing warlord. Not feeling sexy, my guy.

....okay, a LITTLE sexy, but that is hormones and we ignore those.

Fuuuuuck, wandering haaaaands! Now would be a GOOD TIME for door kicking rescues! I do NOT want to learn anything new about myself today! I want to go HOME. Sleep forever, maybe! Have a burrito the size of my head! Oh god. Think unsexy thoughts. Math. Sad puppies! Sad puppies doing MATH!

The Collective had dragged me upright. Pressed my face right up against their Face's bare skin. All I could smell was expensive cologne and man. Warm skin. Oh god, I am so gay. This is hell and I am very, VERY gay. If evil, why sexy hot hot hot? Hormones are making very convincing arguments. Horny brain says let's make terrible life choices.

No! Nooooo. Stop it, Me! We are fucking better then this! God damn it, you trainwreck, you are a ROLE MODEL! Act like one! (But horny...) (NO!!!)

God I was never going to mock the fuckers who hesitates at the "sex n cookies" speech again. Persuasive mother FUCKER!

"Aah~" he sighed contentedly, far too close to a moan for my sanity's liking. Hands having finally found the hidden zippers of my undersuit. Slowly dragging it open. "You are FAR too cute~♡"

"I can't wait to get you off this worthless little rock. Back to ME. I'll have so many WAYS to take care of you~ Backups and rudimentary supports we can set up, at least until I get you something proper."

Horrifying. Deeply Horrifying. REALLY never wanted to know what terrified and horny felt like, but here we are. Distantly, I hear thunder. There's no clouds. A flash of red through the skies. Green followed by metallic purple. Oh thank fuck. Keep his attention. Just... just keep his attention.

"We'll use me as a base. Keep you in stasis. Away from all these ugly, dangerous things~! Just you and me. Perfect. BETTER. Infinite and beautiful. I'll make all sort of bodies just for you to play with. Even let you keep this one! If you want. It'll be a precious memory for us, of where you began. How we met."

A mouth on mine. I can't breathe. Can't escape the arms wrapped around me. My protests do little more then waste oxygen. I feel light headed. Come one, team Alliance! He's here! HE'S HERE!!!

"You're going to be MINE, little Hero. I finally figured it out. What I was missing. It was YOU~♡! My beloved, delicate, little thing~. I'm going to take SUCH good care of you."

"Forever~"