#im a teenager thats all yall need to know

[conjectureand-gloom]

‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧ welcome! ‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧

important information ⬎

alex

they/he/xe/it

non binary 💛🤍💜🖤

lesbian ❤️🧡🤍���💜

youreverydaydemikid -> conjectureand-gloom (15/01/24)

minor (february 8th)

multifandom

fanfiction writer

GMT +10:30

INFP-T

2w1

lyn lapid fan blog @tlit21c

i stand with palestine 🇵🇸

my new main account is @holesofmy-sweater

links ⬎

my ao3

my spotify

my pinterest

my instagram (that i’m barely active on)

hamilton fanfic recommendations

2023 reflection post

fandom list, fanfiction request masterlist, written works, wips, asks, tags and mutuals under the cut

‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧ fandom list ‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧

hamilton (feel free to request for any hamilton ship, i love them all so much, alexander is the absolute DREAM for a multishipper. alexander is my main target for angst! this is my main fandom)

jesus christ superstar (jesus/judas or jesus/judas/mary mainly for jcs, but feel free to ask for any other ships and i’ll consider it!! and no, i am not religious. i have been raised christian, but just ended up with religious trauma)

a good girls guide to murder (pipravi fluff and angst :) but i’ll so gladly write fics about sal and andie, or becca. ravi is my comfort character, and i just torture pip relentlessly)

nevermoor (personally i’m more of a cadence/morrigan girly, but fics for nevermoor will mainly be gen! i love found family, so jupiter & mog fluff or angst is my favourite)

in the heights (canon ships mainly, but feel free to ask for other ships! i’m not in the ITH fandom much, so these are going to be much more inaccurate)

newsies (again, more gen fics, but i do ship dave/jack. also i love angsty crutchie fics. this is one of my smaller fandoms, so these will be super inaccurate)

keeper of the lost cities (preferably marella/linh or tam/keefe! but again, feel free to ask for any ship!!)

hunger games (gen, preferably. but i’m team peeta in case anyone was wondering. fuck gale.)

maze runner (okay i haven’t read or seen TMR in ages but newt/thomas)

divergent (canon ships only. and no, christina/tobias is not canon.)

six (gen all the way. found family. also i love katherine howard angst over any other queen)

the song of achilles (achilles/patroclus? literally what other ship is there????? this is my favourite book)

wednesday (wednesday/enid. i feel like this requires no explanation. also. angst fics. i almost exclusively write angsty wednesday fics, rather than enid. i love the whole of the addams family, and i love familial hurt/comfort)

marauders (i’m not in the marauders fandom much at all, like i really only know the actual hp canon marauders. so.)

‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧ fanfic request rules ‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧

i’ll write for any fandom listed above, i love them all! however i am much more active in hamilton, agggtm, jcs, nevermoor and kotlc, so those fics will be much better than the other fandoms’ would be

i’ll write any genre other than smut, and angst/whump is my absolute favourite. any AUs you could think of, literally anything, i’m not picky!

i won’t write romanticised abuse, non/con, or anything like that. that’s not to say that my fics can’t have dark aspects, but i won’t romanticise any of that.

on that, i’m not going to write any non/con, romanticised or not

also, i won’t write omegaverse, nor will i write y/n or self insert fics. nothing wrong with those genres, i just don’t write them!

‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧ written works ‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧

It’s Only A Matter Of Time - A Hamilton Watches Hamilton Fic

i wish i could say that was the last time

call me son one more time

when they surround our troops

then a hurricane came

take a break

and his right hand man…

she was holding me

the great war

we got traffic on the west side

steal into my affections

the fact that you’re alive is a miracle

fools who run their mouths off wind up dead

my father wasn’t around

philip, you would like it uptown

i may not live to see our glory…

an outrageous demand

stay alive

my dear, angelica

to convince you that i love you

but this situation’s helpless

like mother, like daughter (agggtm)

“but now this room is spinning…”

“i’ll call out your name but you won’t call back”

“like crying out in empty rooms, with no one there except the moon”

me in your sweater, you said it looked better on me than it did you (gifted to @holes-in-my-false-confidence)

baby it’s cold outside

the entire exposé (inspired entirely off of @jittyjames’ fanfiction series ‘the price of his war’)

my world is burning (yet another fic based off of jami’s series ‘the price of his war’)

i’m sorry if any of these links are incorrect, i spent over an hour on just this section

‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧ wips ‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧

achilles, come down (last two works in series still need to be written)

je m’appelle… lafayette? (one chapter to go)

lams (taylor’s version) (a few chapters to go, unsure if it will be finished)

you’re the one who disappears (agggtm, unsure if it will be finished, or when)

judas’ death (jcs angst fanfiction)

untitled (hamil-gang liminal spaces au longfic thing idk)

febuwhump drabbles (possibly)

be my valentine challenge

so big/so small (so big/so small from deh but hamilton and his ma)

bloom like rose thorns (a longfic that may or may not ever be finished)

rewrite of ‘i wish i could say that was the last time’ and ‘call me son one more time’

baby don’t cut (lams angst based off of a song with the same name)

‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧ collaborations ‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧

fem!hamilton au with @jittyjames and @firebalda

if anybody is interested in collabing at all, please hit me up!! i love writing with other people!!!!

‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧ asks ‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧

please send me any asks at all!!! and also please put fic requests in my ask box, i did say that i would have your request out in 6 months, but i have had one sitting in there for over a year (sorry jami.) but um. i promise im trying to get better at that

also, feel free to ask for fic recommendations!!!! i’ve linked a post earlier in this post with a huge list, but it’s not fully updated with some more recent fics :)

‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧ tags ‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧

asks- all the asks ive answered, these are also tagged with the url of the blog, or with anon dearest if it was an anon ask

akeyla ml- posts about/with my incredible incredible partner @holes-in-my-false-confidence who i love so much ❤❤❤❤❤❤

tag games- self explanatory, tag games :)

sleep is overrated- me trying to fix my sleep schedule in 2024

personal- personal vent posts. please block this tag, i have had someone unfollow me before because of these posts :)

₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧ mooties ‎‧₊˚✩ 🪐✩˚₊‧

@jittyjames

@like-the-stars-i-shine (irl friend for 5 years now)

@holes-in-my-false-confidence (my partner, irl <33333)

@felizusnavidad

@weeping-in-the-willows

@swiftieannah

@the1laff

@anixknowsnothin

@purpleblobfrompluto

@starduckys

@now-thats-his-bride

@kwilooo

@evilteapot (irl friend)

@my-dear-gal

@idontwanttobeabuzzkill

@mynightsoutofsight

@cc-horan28

i have more mutuals, but this is everybody who i interact with more often and i actually consider to be my friend. if anybody wants to ever message me or actually become friends with me, please do!!!! i love talking to you guys, please message me, i promise im not scary <333

[theanonymousninja247]

FOLKS OF TUMBLR!

PRESENTING FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER ON ACTUAL PAPER AND NOT JUST A FIGMENT OF MY IMAGINATION, THE ONE AND ONLY…..

✨💙 VINCENT 💙✨

The GOODEST Boi to exist in the history of EVER. I have been working with his concept for 2 years now and this is my first attempt to actually capture him, so many thanks to the ever incredible @kittpunk144 for helping me get out of my comfort zone and inspiring me to get the boi out there🧡🙌🏼

More Fun Facts About the Boy Below ⬇️ 💙 ✨

Name: Vincent

(After the one and only Vincent Van Gogh)

Nickname: Go-Go (Only Mikey and Me)

Age: 24

Gender: Male

Species: Morrocy Tortoise

Height: 6’ 3”

Occupation: Todd’s Blacksmith Apprentice and Co-Todd-Scott Captain

✨ Fun Facts ✨

~ This man can not walk through airport security because he is packing SO many hidden weapons like it’s not even funny. When I say he’s armed, I mean he is ArMeD. He is CoNsTaNtLy working on some new blade as he’s learning to perfect his technique. Baby Boy is a Mary Poppins when it comes to weapons because there is no telling what he’s gonna pull out next.

~ He’s got a nervous tick! Most Morrocoy Tortises use head movements as a form of communication and Vincent is no exception. You can tell what his mood is depending on how he bops his head. ⚠️ WARNING: Man will headbutt you and ram into you to show affection ⚠️ (but don’t worry, he is a shy respectful boi and won’t do so unless express permission is given because he understands he big)

~Baby boy is so incredibly tender and shy like the ultimate gentle giant #strong silent type and unfortunately is incredibly socially awkward. Very innocent and somewhat gullible this man desperately needs social interaction (#he knows sign language to help cope) and enrichment so please come say hi!

How Vincent Interacts with the Boys 🧡💜♥️💙

🧡: First person to meet after Todd. Best buds like ever. Vincent sees the similarities between Mikey and Todd so he naturally gravitates to him as he sees him as a safe person. They get along swimmingly as Vincent thinks the world of Mikey, seeing him as incredibly socially apt and emotionally mature and lowkey the brother he never had. As such he’s like MEGA protective of Mikey in a very ninja kind of way because he KNOWS Mikey can take care of himself. Basically sees Mikey as the man and not the baby brother for once and I think Mikey finds that refreshing.

💜: Somewhat of a glorified Teacher/ Student relationship. Vincent loves to learn and Donnie knows a lot and is more than happy to have a captive audience to listen to his infodumps. They are both introvert buddies and love to weld together, unfortunately feeding into each others drives to build something crazy and dangerous

♥️: Vincent is a BIG BOY (he works in a forge and helps herd Todd’s puppies so you know he’s got those good hugs) and the only person he’s ever really hung around with is Todd (smol) so first interaction with Raph is ultimate intimidation. He’s not used to someone being bigger than he is, he’s never had a big brother, and Mikey adores Raph, so Vincent has NO idea how to interact. So poor baby resorts into the most painfully polite little gentleman you will ever meet. He’s so respectful and cautious it actually hurts.

💙: Ok. So sure, Leo wore blue first but Vincent wears it better. And by that I mean, once Vincent gets out of his shell (literally) he’s actually really naturally suave and sweet. So when it comes to Leo, Vincent thinks he has incredible potential and skill but gets frustrated when Leo tries to hide behind an air of flippancy. All Vincent knows is how to be genuine and doesn’t understand why Leo can’t be straightforward sometimes. It’s a small lowkey rivalry kind of thing between the two, so it makes interactions interesting.

Also shout out to @saspas-corner for being the first person to here the whole schpeel and help me really flush out his character 🙏🏼🧡

ROTTMNT OC TURTLE BASE!!! 🐢✏️

Was bored and decided to make a ROTTMNT base for people!

Please credit if you use it!!! Don’t be too scared to tag me I’d love to see what you guys come up with!

‼️‼️NO NSFW I DONT WANNA SEE THAT SHIT‼️‼️

[kaceythecrunch]

RANT. (sturntok.)

Yall. Im so mad. Sturntok pisses me the fuck off to the point it isn't even funny anymore. This might be messy, so bare with me.

Tara. Why the fuck is everyone pressed about Tara hanging out with the triplet, specifically matt and Chris. Yall are acting as if it was only two of them, like they're on a date. They were with fucking I don't know, 8 other people? Like why does Sturntok care who they hangout with? Did you not learn from elementary school to mind your bees wax, or business? You're probably 15. They're literally 5 years older than you. There is no way, in any universe they're gonna date you girl. ALSO TO SHIT ON TARA?? LIKE GIRL. FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO SHIT ON CUZ HOMEGIRL DONT CARE. SHE DONT CARE. SHE IS STRIVING AND LIVING LIFE LIKE YOU SHOULD GIRL. Live life and don't care. You'll probably have a positive outcome. No cuz y'all know how Chris owns the Saturn necklace thing? Its vivienne underwood. It's less than 20 bucks on Amazon. Also when was the last time y'all saw Chris wearing that necklace girl. Also there's a post from like months, or I think a year ago of Tara wearing the same necklace. These fucking tiktok girls are so annoying. Like we get it, everyone wants to be Tara. (she's my gf.)

Podcast. I saw a bunch of btiches shit on the podcast. Like cmon. THEY ARE PRODUCING AN HOUR LONG VIDEO FOR YALL EVERY WEEK. Mfs are burnt out, you're lucky that they even produce content for you ungreatful hoes. Like lwk, I'd rather have them remove Wednesday videos. I remember when they first started their podcast that they were really excited to start and stuff. I also remember, I believe it was their earlier vlogs. When they were still living in Boston and they haven't like went to LA yet, they were talking about turning their basement into a podcast room. Like cmon. This is something they've been wanting to do and you hoes just don't appreciate anything. Like have y'all's mama's not been pissed at y'all for not appreciating her food. Live life positive and not negative tf. But ofc, I respect their decision.

Intro. Yall just love to shit on everyone. Ruining the party. Sturntok reminds me of the kids-the class "clowns" who would be so shitty to the teacher for no reason and would ruin fun things for everyone. Like guys, I think we should all as a community bully Sturntok. It requires a bit more bullying, just to knock some sense into their heads. Anyways, back to what I was ranting about. I loved their new intro. its a new era. A new them. Change. Is. Fucking. hard. I understand that you love the teens from Boston running around making fools of themselves. Me too, I shall admit it. But in order to get sponsorships, to get the little paring things. (For example, them sponsoring Celsius, even becoming the youtooz thing.) Like they gotta act more professional.

Change. This tied in with the last few things. CHANGE IS HARD. CHANGE IS A DIFFICULT THING. But how the fuck are you gonna live life, and enjoy life when your stuck on one thing forever. Change is needed for growth, and for learning. Like guys, THEYRE 20. I think that's something y'all forget. They aren't teenagers anymore. Its kinda like how when everyone went into middle school and started to not like kiddy things when you still liked kiddy things. When I was in middle school I still like to play with Legos, draw, watch anime. Until I hit 7th grade, aka everyone's downfall. I still enjoy some of those things today but I changed because people in middle school stopped like those things and its embarrassing (well for me at least) to show up in school with anime shirts cuz I'm getting older. Thats what they're feeling I guess. Again, theyre 20 now.

Crazy ass mfs. Crazy, as in them soft mf's on sturntok. Also what pisses me off more is that they're coming here on tumblr. Like no, I know your soft ass belongs on Wattpad bffr. I have a long rant about this one, so bare with me again. They are so so so so so SOOOOO sensitive about the "spicy edits." Sometimes the fucking video frame isn't even about something "spicy" aka- them being shirtless, video frame near their crotch. It was when there was a song about sex. How soft can you be. Most songs these days are about sex. Some songs y'all probably didn't know about was about sex. (cake by the ocean for example.) LIKE LETS ME FOR REAL. MOST SONGS ARE ABOUT SEX. Also with the tiktok audios being removed like cmon. Not everything is about sunshine and rainbows. I remember I commented on a Chris edit and I was like.

"I need this man in my life. He's so hot."

"you're fucking gross. He's a human being and do you know how grossed out he would be if he saw that you said this? (bullshitbullshit,morebullshitandstupidness.)"

Yeah, keeping fucking running your mouth. THIS TIKTOK HAS LIKE 4K VIEWS. DO YOU WANNA KNOW HOW MUCH FUCKING FOLLOWERS THE TRIPLETS HAVE? YEAH. THAT'S NOT EVEN A QUARTER OF WHAT THEY HAVE. THIS VIDEO HAS 1K COMMENTS. ARE THEY FUCKING HUNTING ME DOWN?? MY COMMENT HAS 3 LIKES. WHY WOULD THEY CARE TO FUCKING CHECK GIRL. ITS ALSO TELLING THE FUCKING PERSON WHO EDITED THIS THAT THIS EDIT WAS FIRE AND THAT THEY MADE THE EDIT HELLA GOOD. UR FUCKING LUCKY I KEPT MY ANGER TO MYSELF CUZ OH GIRL. I WOULD SUCKER PUNCH YOU. You know whats also funny? They're the same people who will be pissed with when they see matt or Chris with a female. Like girl. You're calling me fucking gross? Do you think how much more worse that is than my comment? You ruin friendships. OG sturniolo fans know that they've been friends with girls. If you genuinely care, yall would know that nick made most of matt and chris' friends. Meaning most of them were females. SO OBVIOUSLY THEYRE GONNA HAVE GIRL FRIENDS. I remember watching the Zach sang pod when nick was on and he explained that matt usually doesn't make the friends. Theres a joke where matt says "I'm gonna make a friend that wasn't originally nick's friends." smth like that. Anyways, off topic. Just because they are seen with a girl, doesn't mean they are fucking dating them. Like shut the fuck up. please. Respectfully shut the fuck because I'm a nice person. Also Chris gives off major virgin vibes lets bffr.

Madi. Yall hate so bad on Madi and its fucking grossing me out. Why do you have to ship her with matt and chris??? Literally to the point they can't even put her in photo dumps or videos. You just gotta ruin it for everyone, huh? shes fucking gorgeous, and she's so funny in videos. Plus, when she does talk shes hillarious. She literally reminds me of Matt. She doesn't fucking talk much because she is more of a listener.. Like guys bffr. How can you hate her when she barley spoke in videos. Like respectfully, shut the fuck up. Yall just jealous shes pretty.

Calling Nick fine. I also hate them mfs who are always running their mouth about girls calling Nick fine. Lets bffr. Y'all didn't think a gay guy is fine? I'm sure you've had a crush on one gay person before. And if you haven't trust me. You will. I had a crush on my gay friend in 8th grade. I feel like its a canon even in every girl's life. anyways, I hate when girls will be scared to call nick hot.

"Nick is so fine. But like as a cool guy friend way. Please don't attack me."

POOR GIRL BELIEVES SHE IS GONNA BE ATTACKED IF SHE CALLS A GAY MAN FINE. Sturntok leave her the fuck alone. He's hot as fucking and I will kill civilians if I'm not given more nick edits. He's so fine. Literally the hottest triplet.

If u made it here thanks. There was shit on my chest that I really needed to let out. What have we learned today?

Sturntok can suck my fucking dick.

Thanks goodbye.

Me to Sturntok :

[pepper-makes-art]

relavity falls stans, graunts, n friends

oK THEYRE HERE NOW AND NOT JUST FIDDLEFORD!!!

fiddleford can be found here!!!

i wish i could've done more sketches but im a bit busy atm </3 will def do some on the weekends though!!

on the au:

instead of taking place in 2014, it takes place in 2024 now! which doesnt rlly change much outside of appearances and slang lol.

bold is what their au name is

stanford (ford) <--> dipper

pretty self explanatory! i feel like stanford'd be an x-men fan, hence the x patch on his shoulder lol. also yes, dipper is a trans woman here. and she has glasses bc fuck dude i hate drawing regular eyes.. i thought the design looked a bit empty, so i decided to make that cool glove thing ford had dipper's robot hand thingy!

stanley (lee) <--> mabel (mason)

stanley now wears a hat. hoorah. nothing much to say here besides him also smuggling shanklin in (w/o the knife unfortunately). mabel's still impersonating her sibling (who, before the portal scene, doesn't know that she's a girl now) under the name of mason, but has ultimately shed her sibling's fashion tastes for her own. mabel wears a turtleneck UNDER the suit bc she doesnt feel heat apparently!

candy <--> wendy

candy's now a 15 yo asian kid who took up the cashier job under grauntie bc she needed more extracurriculars and the experience. totally cant relate to that haha. wendy's now a 12 yo mischievous lil lumberjack who's best friends w/ stanley (i thought it'd be interesting since theyre all now still associated w each other) and who has ALL the middle school tea (which is A LOT)

grenda <--> soos

as much as i want the ages to line up relatively (haha get it.), i think it'd be funny if mabel just hired a bunch of teenagers to run the shack (not sure what to call it). grenda's the 15 yo handy(wo)man who has the voice of an angel and the golden mentality of "smash with couch"! soos is now a friendly n equally naive 12 yo who's best friends w stanely (yada yada) and who somehow always solves problems

on dipper and mabel (will be using he/him for pre-transition dipp):

hoo boy. i see SO many ppl arguing abt their relationship, and i just gotta say, i can tell who has siblings and who doesn't! (joke. thats a joke. mostly) anyways, theyre good siblings!! up until high school, where after drifting apart somewhat, they have a big argument abt where theyre going in life - dipper wants to go to insert rlly good college name and become a scientist while mabel, well, she doesn't know where she wants to go. unbeknownst to them, while theyre fighting, their parents are also fighting. suddenly, their parents split, and mabel is forced to live with her mom and dipper with his dad, far apart from each other. dipper (wearily) accepts this while mabel silently resents dipper for his submission

dipper attends his dream school but is unhappy in his schooling years. afterwards, with his 12 phds or whatever the hell, he goes to a quaint town named relativity falls... mabel becomes an artist of sorts, taking commissions n such, but finds that this doesn't exactly lead to profit. she then becomes a sort of con(wo)man and psychic in attempts to capitalize the strange. she DEF doesn't get into as much srs trouble as stanley did back in his day, but she still lands herself in hot water from scamming and stealing across state lines...

im tired rn so lmk if yall wanna hear more lol.

[wilsons-three-legged-siamese]

intro nontheless 🔥

before i get started, i do not post anything to do with political issues in the world.

i am not being hateful, i just simply do not know enough about it. im very uneducated on it and id rather not get into politics online. thank you. x

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name: wil / wiliam

pronouns: he/him

gender: trans masc

sexuality: gay

age: 1m a minor. but idc abt 'dni

adults', yall are chill

birthday: june 2nd

zodiac: gemini

MBTI: iNTP

fandoms: house md, dead poets society,

swing kids, arctic monkeys,

big bang theory

jeeves and wooster, rsl, hugh

laurie, hamilton (musical & hi-

story, history mainly)

extra info: i might dm you. randomly. i love

sending random asks mbbbb bros

warnings: i will make suggestive jokes as

i am a teenage boy in secondary

school, lol. also maybe sense-

tive subjects? ill always add

a tw. just yeah-

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my dear mutuals;

@example-of-a-romantic @asclexe @arrr-im-a-dead-poet @yourfavvgal @prettypinkbubbless @adozenforks @desire-mona @forrestpoet @ghostboyhood @sillyhyperfixator @jellifishiez @joonof1989 @kattt-5865 @lv3buzzz @zephsterrrrrrrrrr @crow-king-ash @xxcherryberriezxx @vivaalaviidaaa @boabel @birdyboyfly @neil-perrys-reincarnation @noctilucaa @neil-perrys-suicidal-tendencies @1mlostnow @anhonest-puck @pingunaa @this-vexes-me @richardcameronshusband @littlelqtte @more-mousebites @alightelixe @consumed-star @billi-ashli @literallydoctorhouse <3

(i think thats everyone, just please dm or ask if i missed you. or if you wouldn't like to be tagged <3)

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boundaries ‼️

i dont appreciate people being negative. like all the time. im extremely good at reading people, so if i feel like you are lying about your problems, i will block you. its happened too many times. my dms are open if you need to vent, but dont make it a regular thing. i have my own things to deal with, so i appreciate if you only vent a few times - make it occasional.

also please dont block me outta nowhere. i wanna know what i did, please.

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my side blog; @ask-head-of-cardio ! i dont use it as much as id like to but go check it out <3

ask wilson blog; @dr-well-adjusted

ask meeks blog; @mr-ill-try-anything-once

gore/medical blog; @w1l-g0r3y

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my kins;

steven meeks [dead poets society (1989)]

james wilson [house md (2004-2012)]

will mackenzie [the inbetweeners (2008-2010)]

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arvid ???? [swing kids (1993)]

adam kay [this is going to hurt (2022)]

links to significant posts & my socials;

oc info - sydney forrest

top post

tiktok

airbuds

spotify

stats

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background on my user!;

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special mentions;

@yourfavvgal - matching bios ‼️

@literallydoctorhouse - MY BOYFRIEND ❤

@joonof1989 - MATCHING PFPS TEDHDE

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bonus..;

MATCHING WITH MY DUSTI/COTTON SCRAPP 😚😚 @lefthandedspaghetti

[blckslutsforchrizz]

TW: depression, SH, SA, ED, shitty ppl, suicidal ideation?

Being depressed with a hypocritical ass family is so weird. I’ve been depressed since i was 12 and only recently got diagnosed, all those years it’s “ur being lazy” “ur rude and disrespectful” “ur wicked” “ur dramatic”, but all of sudden it’s “omg I always knew something was wrong” girl Ill bitch slap u all the way to fucking Africa dont play wit me. The amount of times yall degraded me and making me believe I’m the worst person to walk this earth is ridiculous if u ‘always knew something was going with me’, you don’t tell a 13 year old whose by the way going thru puberty and learning to deal with her emotions that she’s ‘a burden’ or ‘too much to handle’ thats so wrong. I remember the first time I self harmed, I was so overwhelmed and when I blew up yelling n fucking screaming u would want to tell me “your a child what the fuck do u have going on to be depressed or have anxiety” have u not been a teenager? When I told u what the fuck was going on ur response to me was “how was I supposed to know that if u never told me” BUT I DID THO WHEN I WOULD REFUSE TO INTERACT WITH THE PPL INVOLVED? WHEN I WOULD SHUT DPWN EVERYTIME I WAS AT THE PLACE. But it’s not only that YOU FUCKING LIVED WITH ME HOW TF DID U MISS THAT????? When I finally admitted I was sexually assaulted for the first time when I was 6 for 2 years YOU DID NOTHING. All u did was cry to make me feel like u cared but he never went to jail. He is walking free as we speak. He is still allowed to interact with me and other little girls. WHYYYYYYYYYYY. When I told you ur friends kids were threatening to rape me when I was 10 YOU DID NOTHING. When I told u my cousin was blackmailing me to have sex with him IM THE ONE WHO GOT PUNISHED WHYYYYYYYYYY? When I told u ur boyfriend is asking me to send him pics in ur lingerie at 15 fucking years old u never spoke to him? And I’m supposed to be grateful for him? Im supposed to do shit for him? Im supposed to hang out with him like nothing ever happened? Ur a fucking hypocritic. U would hit me when I ate more food than usual I WAS A GROWING CHILD ITS A NORMAL FUCKING THING instead u made me have an unhealthy relationship with food. At 10 years old I stared starving myself NO 10 YEAR OLD NEEDS TO EXPERIENCE THAT. I STARTIED CUTTING MY SELF AT 12 EXCUSES MEEEEEEE?And when u found out ur reaction is “why are u doing that? Stop it”, hell my first suicide attempt I was fucking 11 but u didn’t know right? And when all the sadness turned into rage ur fav thing to do was berate me for being “a miserable angsty teen” “ur being rude” maybe if u paid enough attention it would have to get to that point. All the signs were there but u all ignored them. And after all that n I go out of my way to get my diagnosis Yall wanna act all sympathetic in my face y’all are fucking hypocriticals and that’s why I don’t like going to see y’all. At the of the day I was the child you were the adult. U should’ve known better. Go fuck yourself.

Sorry

[shotorozu]

ooh, can i please request "pulling your partner onto your lap" for Izuku?? ty!!

OTHER WAY AROUND — MIDORIYA IZUKU

(send me a bnha character + a physical intimacy prompt and i’ll make something out of it!)

gender neutral reader, reader has an assertive personality, reader is STRONG but no mentions of a quirk, lower case intended 😭

note(s): hey yall 🧍‍♀️ i know im posting these slowly as i could possibly go but something real bad happened at school, so i just had to delay the uploads a little bit (but i am feeling a bit better so expect at least one post per day this week because of valentines day 😭)

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midoriya izuku if not rarely— never pouts.

he recognizes pouting as a part of sulking— which is a normal thing. (in fact, he does it a lot)

as much as no one really says it out loud, everyone has done it at least once in their life. a kid pouting because they couldn’t get their parents to buy them that toy they really wanted, a teenager that’s feeling particularly moody that hour, or an adult thats plans just didn’t work out.

he feels lots of things, especially after all he’s been through. at this point, what hasn’t he felt? positive, negative (sulking included) and the neutral. of course he has— it’s all a part of the process, but for some reason, he feels the need to suppress the negative a little (an understatement) more than regular.

midoriya izuku if not rarely— never pouts.

but he’s doing exactly that, and you know it. he’s sulking, pouting over something that doesn’t look worthy enough to be pouting over for the green haired teenager personally. and he knows that you know— so, he just hopes that means he doesn’t have to say it out loud. he isn’t sure if it’s something you’d usually ask or tell someone.

but he knows you— your unofficial ability to pull out any thought out of his mind, so he knows he’ll give in and end up fessing up what’s on his mind. he just knows.

you step in front of him, and he’s pulled out of his trance when you tap his chin and tilt his head upwards.

“why the long face? hmm…” you question, humming thoughtfully to yourself afterwards. if izuku’s pouting— then that’s when you know that something’s really, really wrong.

he cracks an imbalanced smile, “does it bother you?”

“not really,” you bring your unoccupied hand to cup his cheek, “it’s just that my boyfriend’s pouting, y’know? so how could i not ask?”

he brings his hand up to rest against the hand cupping his cheek, “it’s almost as if you see right through me.” he intones, sounding less shocked and more— interested and genuine.

“i mean, you’re not exactly slick.” you bluntly remark, “an open book.”

he goes red at that— “i figured,” and he starts to wonder how many times he’s been obvious on something he was trying to conceal. oh the embarrassment is starting to flood through him—

“so go on, shoot.” but it goes out the window when you start scratching under his chin like he was a cat. a shiver urges to run through him.

but the less embarrassed he becomes, the more insecure he grows. the main reason why he was pouting in the first place starts to come back to him.

“so,” he begins, clearing his throat with a cough, “promise you won’t think it’s weird?”

“i promise,” to him, your eyes look like they twinkled with sincerity. “although, you’ve really gotten me curious. is it actually weird or are you just being subjective?”

an open book, he thinks to himself. you’re so right about him. it’s like you know him like the back of your hand.

“it could be both? depends.. maybe.. actually..? ” he mumbles, genuinely considering which reason was it. you blink— and you become dead silent, as a way to allow him to respond.

he understands, “okay so,” he squeezes your hand cupping his face, “why don’t you want to sit on my lap?”

you don’t respond, like you’re expecting more out of his question. but to find the green haired hero in training not say anything else, and blink back in similar fashion— translated into ‘oh, that was really it’ for you.

“..is there more you wanna say?” you speak after a few seconds of nobody saying anything pass by, “i find it hard to believe that there’s no context to this apparently weird question. because honestly, this isn’t strange. i’m wounded by your dishonesty.”

izuku lets out a chuckle, which was genuine, but ended up sounding nervous. he begins to fiddle with his hands,

“there is context,” he gulps, taking his gaze off of you— being unable to take the extensive amount of eye contact. “it’s just that, i’ve carried a lot of people, so far. because of heroics, y’know? and most of them also sat in my lap— although unintentional. i’ve asked you before, but whenever i do it’s like.. you don’t say no, but you act as if nothing happened?”

you hum, allowing him to carry on— and you continue to scratch under his chin while listening.

“and if you don’t want to, that’s totally fine! but if it’s because you’re worried about crushing me or what not, then i don’t think it’s a concern—”

“izuku,” you cut in, halting all movements to take your hands off of him. he misses the contact already, “don’t you think it’s because i want it to be the other way around?”

he gulps rather loudly.

“what does.. that mean?” he questions, feeling his face already starting to warm up rapidly.

laughing, you poke his cheek. “although i don’t mind your idea, i prefer the idea of you planted on my lap instead.”

he lets out a squeak, and your laughter rings in his ears again.

“oh!” he exclaims, he only wished your laughter would’ve provided physical comfort like how it usually does— but it only managed to make him flush red more. “i.. i see!”

“yep.” your lips make the ‘p’ pop with emphasis.

“that.. makes sense. i never thought of it that way!”

you give izuku a smile, patting your thighs with both hands as a signal. he knows what you’re trying to tell him— he’s done it as a signal to you before. for him, it was done so casually.

yet for some reason, with your assertiveness, it was anything but.

“you want me to…?”

you pat your lap again, “it’s right here.”

“okay, okay. alright,” your freckled boyfriend breathes in deeply. suddenly, he found himself standing up and putting his jittering hands on your shoulders lightly— heart making several steep drops in his chest.

and then, you’re lowering him on your lap, and he lets out yet another squeak as you maneuver him on your lap, sitting him on one leg and spreading his legs across yours in seconds.

you pat his thigh, just to feel what it’s like to have his legs on top of yours, and you shift your hand to rest it against the small of his back.

he wonders if his heart could hammer against his chest any harder. he could hear it in his ears, and he was acutely aware of it.

despite it, he’s clinging to you like he belongs (he does) and he wraps an arm around your shoulder. “i’m sorry if i’m—”

“shh, shh.” you hush him, bringing the hand that’s not resting against his back up to stroke the back of his head— petting his hair and threading through the green, voluminous locks with your fingers.

“hypocrite.” you whisper, but you don’t exactly mean anything malice of it. “telling me not to worry about me being heavy on you, but here you are, worrying about being heavy on me.”

“my bad—”

“no,” you’re almost amazed by the way he could find new ways to apologize, “just, enjoy this, will you? isn’t this nice? this is what it must feel for those people to be sitting on your lap. it’s comfy, right?”

you’re assertive, but izuku could also sense the tiniest speck of nervousness in your voice. he knows you just like how you know him— you’re minding the way you’re coming off right now, and his reaction to all of this, like you’re worried he wouldn’t like it

which is out of the ballpark, because—

“yeah, you’re right.” he whispers, “this is comfy.”

this might start to become his next favorite past time.

»»————-　♡　————-««

[couldtransitionsaveher]

GUREN ICHINOSE from OWARI NO SERAPH/SERAPH OF THE END

JUSTIFICATIONS:

"Ichinose Guren was born into a religious Sect which was created five hundred years ago in a political conflict in which two brothers from the main house fought over an Ichinose woman. She had chosen the younger of them and as punishment she and here lover were violeted and disowned. The outcasts created a new sect in their name. Guren is believed to be their saviour, the one destined to liberate the Clan from their oppression, paralleling her role. The main Clan, Mikado no Oni, view Guren and everyone of Gurens family as naturally weak and subservient in a way that clearly mimics patriarchal oppression. When Guren was five years old she met Mahiru Hiiragi, heir to Mikado no Oni. Guren was very obviously jealous of her and their meeting is used to symbolise Guren learning her place in the world. Continously throughout the Guren refuses to give up on Mahiru despite her quite frankly ruining Guren's life and being unable to catch up with her. Guren gives up her humanity to inject a demon all for purposes of protecting her friends and striving to liberate her clan, while also chasing after Mahiru and her power. This eventually leads Guren to cause the apocalypse in a first act of free will. (forced to choose between the strength she desires and her own emotinonal "weakness") Mahiru mends with Gurens weapon taking over as her demon, causing Guren to become a namanari (a half demon made from two separate personalities, Gurens and Mahirus in this case who's human personality slowly starts to adapt the demonic traits). In consequence of this Guren acts all the more feminine when striving to get what she wants (to ressurect all of humanity. I think thats also trans because its a sort of rebirth in metaphor for transition.) Transition could have saved her, as i believe her gender envy for Hiiragi Mahiru caused the apocalypse." - @cannibalfrodo

"im really shit at writing out media analysis i either do it solely in my head or via fic so yall are just gonna have to trust me for this one.

the writer really horribly sucks at writing female characters but it's clear from the start (in catastrophe at 16 most noticeably, but even in the manga too) that guren isn't written like any of the male characters (even the other male protag of the manga, yuu) and much more resembles the female characters. a lot of her personality and identity is heavily sculpted by the traumatizing and pressuring life she's lived so far (being brought up as the head of a scorned branch, beaten by adults for simply being born in the way she was, raised with a lot of crunching expectations, etc). most of her actions in ca16 come from a deep want to please who she's with, or to not cause trouble with herself (#same bestie)—she knows she needs to be a son for her father, for her clan, for their retribution. she knows she doesn't have time to think on her emotions or wants, which is very evident throughout all of ca16 until the final book as more and more shit piles up on her plate and she's forced by her romantic interest, mahiru, to finally confront her "human sin" (which is loving her friends. and also being trans).

she never fully opens up to anyone, this includes mahiru, but nonetheless their relationship IS different (guren is very much like "i love you, you're so much like me but braver, i wish i were you" @ mahiru). in their first meeting again as teenagers she compliments how beautiful and powerful mahiru has grown, and does so multiple times throughout the books, most of which are immediately after her inner monologue beats her down and she goes into great depth on why she's so weak and unworthy (especially compared to mahiru).

she's not allowed to be herself, as a man and definitely not as a woman, throughout all books and manga & i believe that if she came out to her friends (who love her so much and would support her through anything) everything bad she ever does in the future (which i didn't even begin to COVER the main series) could be prevented because she'd be much more happy with herself and spectre in her relationships.

also she experiences the end of the world. truly just a girl in the world" - @9ureshin

Reminder: Submissions are always open! Submit here!

Did you make your daily click today?

[pwnyta]

Now that im done with my GI dailies...

ROUND 2 of the BNHA award show starts!

The award for QUICKEST YET BADDEST ENTRANCE AND EXIT goes to...

Star!

Damn she was a bad bitch....

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Award for I DONT BELIEVE THAT MAN HAS EVER BEEN TO MEDICAL SCHOOL goes to....

ITS A TIE!!!

JEANIST AND WHATS-HIS-FACE!

Ok they can preform open heart surgery? Sure...

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Award for BIGGEST ASSPULL goes to...

ANOTHER TIE AND WELCOME BACK

BEST JEANIST & SERIOUSLY I CANT REMEMBER HIS NAME FOR THE LIFE OF ME

AND!!! ERI!!!

Damn this was dumb as hell....

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Award for MOST DISAPPOINTING COME BACK goes to...

MIRIO!

...off-screen.... girl... Mirio I love you so much theres no way you should be this lame...

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Award for SERIOUSLY WHY THE FUCK WAS THIS GUY ADDED? IT HAD LIKE NO SATISFYING PART IN THE STORY.... goes to....

KUROGIRI!

Kurogiri you were so intriguing before Hori made you a zombie of Aizawas friend he just randomly added...

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The award for MAKING ME THINK OF THE WEATHER EPISODE FROM UNHHHHH goes to....

...??? HER!!!!

HELLLOOOO WERE HAVING WEATHER~~~~

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Award for MOST WASTED STORY POTENTIAL IN MAYBE ALL OF MANGA HISTORY goes to....

Mutant bigotry!!!

Really Hori your bringing this up now? To try and make Spinners random character turn understandable? Weve had mutant characters the ENTIRE GOD DAMN TIME HORI!!! PRO HEROES! STUDENTS! RANDOM BG CHARACTERS! YOURE BRINGING THIS UP NOW!? TOKOYAMI ALMOST KILLED SOME OF HIS CLASSMATES!!!! YOU THINK BIGOTS WOULDNT HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT IT!? WHAT A TOOTHLESS TONE-DEAF RACISM ALLEGORY!! HOLY SHIT HORI IM SO PISSED ABOUT THIS YOU CANT EVEN IMAGINE.

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Award for MOST DRAWN OUT NOT-DEAD REVEAL goes to...

BAKUGO

I mean obviously.... You know letting him actually have some smooth character development woulda been too hard for Hori...

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Award for HOLY SHIT THE 'CEST SHIPPERS ARE GONNA LOVE THIS SHIT goes to....

ITS A TIE!!!! TWINSIES!!!

Endeavor/Dabi

AND!!!

THE SHIGARAKIS!

...Yall can get mad at me for this one... You know I aint wrong...

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Award for MOST UNHINGED YET SELFLESS ROMANTIC SACRIFICE goes to....

STAIN!!!!

Seriously Im in tears... how did this happen...

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Award for THE MOST POINTLESS FACE HEAL FACE TURN IN HISTORY goes to....

....HER!

??? Seriously you got pissed about killing villains so you started killing heroes even a teenage boy? Thats so fucking stupid girl....fuckin WHAT?

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Award for I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS YOURE AN UNDERRATED TOP TIER G AND YOU DESERVE AN AWARD goes to...

MT LADY!!!

DAMN SHES FUCKING COOL! NEVER DISAPPOINTS IN A FIGHT!

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Award for SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! SHUT UP!!! THIS ISNT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!! I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE Y- goes to...

ENDEAVOR!!

SHUT YOUR BITCH ASS UP ENDEAVOR!!!

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Award for THEY NEEDED TO TAKE YOU OUT EARLIER ON SO YOU COULDNT CLAP THE BADDIES CHEEKS AND ITS SO OBVIOUS WHY DID HORI MAKE YOU SO STRONG FOR NO REASON TOKOYAMI???? goes to....

TOKOYAMI!!!

HOLY SHIT TOKOYAMI!

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Award for I HATE THAT THEYRE MAKING ME DEFEND YOU... goes to...

HAWKS!!!

Hawks gave Twice plenty of chances to stop fucking killing people so he could be taken in alive! WHY DO I HAVE TO DEFEND THIS BLACKHOLE OF WASTED FUCKIN TIME HORI WTF....???

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Award for MOST WEIRDLY TOUCHING DEDICATION goes to...

All Mights CANT STOP TWINKLING attack!

The way I cried a little... my little tchotchke.... Him changing his attacks from states to his students was already so good but damn... :') Aoyama deserved this.

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Award for MOST TRAGICALLY SUBMISSIVE BABYGIRL goes to...

ALL MIGHT!!!

I mean we knew from the jump but.... DAMN Toshi.

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Award for MOST HATED GOOD SHIP goes to...

KIRISHIDO!!!

Seriously FUCK those KRBK fans! Im so glad you got bested by the BKDKs you rancid fucks.... This ship was always superior!!!

------

Award for LOVING SHOTO THE MOST goes to....

Certainly not his fucking family....

IIDA!!!!

So this is love... mmm mmm mmm mmm~ So this is... love?

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Award for SICKEST VILLAIN DESIGN goes to...

Kunieda(I guess?)

Seriously this guy is so fucking cool looking. Clears literally every single villain design. Its not even close.

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The award for MOST HORNGRY goes too....

AFO

Seriously AFO... if you werent so obsessed with Toshi you probably woulda won its literally so fucking funny.... Elevated the nosebleed trope to literally spurting blood from the forehead veins from how aggressively horknee you are. LMAO. AND YET somehow this is not the weirdest boner you have for another man.

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Award for THE MOST CONSISTENTLY GOOD CHARACTER IN BNHA goes to...

ALL MIGHT. Obviously.

IDK if Hori loves you or hates you by how he writes you Toshi but damn you wear this consistency so fuckin well not even Hori could fuck you up!

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Award for MOST REALISTICALLY AGED BY THE STRESS OF THIS BATTLE goes to...

Naomasa!!

.... LMAO... Damn. Stress so intense it made you turn into a distinctly designed character.. The magic of facial hair and eyebags...

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The award for REALLY BITCH!? YOU HAVE A PERFECT COUNTER FOR STAINS QUIRK BUT NOT ONE TO AGE YOURSELF TO COUNTER YOUR DEAGING?! THATS FUCKIN CONVENIENT HORIKOSHI goes to...

AFO!!! For BLOODLET!

The only blemish on the otherwise sickest side battle in this whole arc TBH..

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Thats the end of part 2 of BNHA AWARDS!!! Some serious upsets this round! Damn!

[honeyed-latte]

Fucked Up Pom Lore:

Totally up to yall if you read this, you have been warned, this WILL have emotional whump and it WILL handle very polarizing, kind of gross topics. Pom is an OC close to my heart now BECAUSE of the touchy subjects in her lore.

Its long as hell bc Im a yapper.

Due to how Tumblr works their blacklisting, I wont be censoring the words for the safety of those who have them blacklisted!

So, TW: Manipulation

TW: Religious Trauma

TW: Emotional Whump

TW: Accidental Incest (mentioned, no details)

TW: Suicidal Ideation

TW: Unreliable Narrator

TW: Emotional Cheating

Pom was aware of her family dynamic, Valka never hid that she had a very alive father and brother, but much like her mother Pom was of a mind that Berk was hostile toward dragons— unacceptable.

Thus, Stoick and Hiccup were unworthy of Poms consideration, let alone unworthy of meeting her at all. She is a dragon, they don't like dragons, it's simple math.

But thats not to say she didn't love them as fiercely as she was able, built by Valkas tales of her father and all the sweet stories of her brother. Her mother says the Gods have bigger plans for the women of their family.

—

Hiccup, during his year on Dragons Edge, prone to his love for cartography and adventure, finds himself on a unusually lush island to the north-east of Dragons Edge. It just barely skirts the Dragon Hunters typical stomping grounds and its a beauty.

He fully intends to map it, to scout it's dragon population and maybe make a few friends in the process. He's not fully aware he's being stalked by a human until he's a full day into his work and Toothless's prickly attitude tips him off.

The issue is he can't find them, he can't see anyone at all...

He decides to stay a few days, three maybe, just to get the full island and so far the presence isn't malicious, even Toothless's attitude mellows after the first day.

On the third and final day after waking earlier then usual, he finally manages to spot the person he theorized was stalking him. A young girl, around his age, bathing in the spring at the center of the island. The dragons milling around don't seem threatened or perturbed at all by her as she unobtrusively splashes her unruly, long hair and even with Toothless nudging him judgementally- Hiccup is a teenage boy, he is not immune to a pretty girl naked dripping in water.

He stares. Hard.

He does more then stare, fumbles out a journal and draws the seemingly feral girl. Splashing the water, grinning at the Wooly Howll that slapped her back with it's tail, and when she pulls herself out to dry on the rocks- spread out like a content dragon in the morning light.

She's braiding flowers into her red hair when he cracks a twig and she catches his eyes, a mirror of green. Hiccup runs, because he doesnt really know what else to do?

But he doesn't feel eyes on him for the rest of the day, he feels horribly guilty and creepy for looking and then drawing her, but she was strange and pretty and he's just a man???

He sleeps uneasy and wakes to a familiar flower tucked into his pauldron. Its more charming then alarming.

—

Poms never seen a man up close, Valka does any sort of battle needed with Hunters, and Queen Mala always meets them alone. So seeing the Howl Island suddenly have a stand alone man on it is....weird and exciting, his dragon is even more interesting- a Night Fury, probably the last one alive, what a find.

So she watches, and follows, and learns. His dragon, Toothless, welcomes her at their fire when his man sleeps, they talk. Toothless is a great conversationalist but she attributes that to his rider who also seems chatty.

It's less insulting or terrifying that he snuck up on her while she bathed, if he'd tried to hurt her SunBurn would have crisped him like a fish. But he didnt. So his fear seemed a bit of an overreaction....

So she tried to soothe any worry, putting a little Viking Pom in his armour as he slept, Toothless's wary eyes on her all the while.

—

Duties drag him home but he comes back swiftly, curious and perhaps a bit more.

He spends two weeks on that little island building tenuous trust with the feral girl, watching her free fall and fly with the Typhoomerang that had watched over her that morning, racing them, watching her bond with Toothless, he spends four days convinced she cant speak and doesnt understand him but he talks anyway.

She speaks, a rigid and proper way in fact with the most odd resonance, and tells him he's the only man she's ever seen. So he tells her stories, shows her maps, lets her put flower crowns around his head and stems tied to his fingers like rings.

Like they've known one another forever, he learns about her too. She learned her vocabulary from books, she lives with her mother, she isn't from this island and is only here to help the baby dragons, she was raised with dragons, the scar on her shoulder was from an injured Gronkle she saved.

It feels like a lifetime, just them. They just get one another effortlessly.

Other things take place as well, intimate things, often actually, and Hiccup only realizes they never exchanged names when he's hugging her goodbye for the final time. It feels right to not know, they'll never see eachother again after they part, if he knows he'll want to find her when the war is over- he can't do that. So they remain "Sunhair", what the dragons call her (apparently), and "Man".

Meeting her again two years later, as his mother (his mom!) drags him into a smaller rotunda of ice inside the Alpha's Sanctuary is not the meeting he had hoped for. Neither is he as elated by the acquisition of a sister as he was by his mother.

Valka doesnt ask, Pom doesn't tell, Hiccup ignores the disgust and dread in favour of battle and newfound family- then Stoick dies.

Its all a mess after that. He's Chief and his family was halved yet again, and the one person in the world who he felt was his truest equal is his sister because of course she is, that makes sense doesn't it?

The sudden fraternal feelings war with the memory of a girl he felt he could have loved under different circumstances, he figures Pom feels the same.

She's closer with Eret then him, and he tries not to be jealous about it, but he can't blame her when he can't even meet her eyes somedays.

Is it better if Eret is the brother she wishes for or the lover she can actually attain? Hiccup can't be either of those things.

—

Eret is Pom's bestfriend, only friend really, they're both outsiders watched warily by Berkians and especially Hiccup's friends.

He almost is like a brother, a proper one, one that doesn't stay from her like she's diseased or look pale when she hugs him.

Hiccup doesn't turn her away, he even welcomes her into his home as he did with Valka, but he doesn't seek her out unless he's truly troubled.

Astrid is another hurdle entirely, Pom doesn't like her. She's insubordinate, doesn't show the Queen of her nest respect even though she's to be his wife (thats something Pom avoids thinking about), she is meant to be a pillar of strength and confidence as Hiccup's mate where all can find comfort and instead she hurts them physically or insults them verbally.

Human rules are perturbing, Astrid is allowed all of this and even excused it because..."reasons". In a nest, a real one, Pom would have made her dislike known and they would battle until one perished or was exiled in their failure.

Humans aren't dragons.

So she has to pretend to like the girl to "keep peace" and swallow back all the manners she learned from her people for the sake of her brother.

Her brother.

The brother that won't look in her eyes and won't break fast with her most days, the one that doesn't touch her unless she closes the distance and jumps away as if they're filthy if someone so much as glances them touching hands.

Its all a big joke of Loki's most likely or the Gods are punishing them, its likely her fault. She should have asked his name two years ago.

She debates leaving often, only soothed by Valka's frustration and Erets fretting, she would see herself away from this Tribe thats not hers and a brother that isn't a brother any more then Stoick was her father, she would stay in the Sanctuary like she always did.

--Or perhaps drop into the sea, allow SunBurn to stay safe among a nest with the Alpha.

Pom dreams of death more then she does leaving, more then she dreams of Hiccups hands, more then she has nightmares of Stoicks body and Dragos army and the fury burning in Hiccups eyes.

If she were to die then Hiccup's conscience would be freed and cleared, he'd not worry of others learning the shame he has, Berk would lose nothing and neither would her Dragons. Valka would mourn, surely Eret as well, but they're safe and they're whole and thats what matters. Hiccup, as a Chief and Queen, would rule stronger if she weren't in his shadow.

—

Hiccup disagree's with Pom's feelings even if he doesn't know them.

In fact its an ongoing source of night terrors; Pom leaving, Pom taking the plasma blast that killed his dad (she had actually tried to, and that doesnt help the nightmares), never having found her at all.

He's conflicted before anything else, they both seem to agree not to mention it but he suspects Valka knows, somedays he thinks Eret and Astrid might as well.

Astrid doesn't know and she never will if he has any say, his and Pom's tryst predated their relationship and in a normal circumstance he still wouldn't have told her, it would just be undue pressure.

Its stressful all the time, only finding reprieve in ale and in the early hours of the morning. It was an accident, it hasn't occured since, now that they know who the other is it'll never happen again. That's good, no sacrilegious temptations, except that he feels just as discontent with the idea that they'll never have that connection back as he is with the knowledge that it happened at all.

Loving her and being in love with her both feel damning, but its there all the same.

What a horrific joke this all turned into.

[ma1dita]

if you had to rank pjo/hoo characters how would you rank them and why?

i have not fully ventured into hoo im gonna be real w you so lets do a semi analysis, and since im kinda type a and scared that i dont get directions ill do favorite and least favorite

i have big main character syndrome and i think its my fatal flaw (/j) but mcs always get me... so fucking emotional--- watching the show and in comparison to the books AFTER the fact, i think its crazy but ---percy would have to be first i would cradle that boy into my arms and fight the gods for him. he needs a BREAK. ALL OF THEM DO HONESTLY.

the whole dumbification of him as a character irks me sometimes because its so obvious that he has little to no self esteem but is an intelligent guy in his own right. imo viewers were critiquing that bit in the show a lil too hard, walker ate that shit up. percy is The Himbo though. also idk if this is unpopular but i also loved rachel as a character bc she is The Girlboss. i wish i was as cool and as smooth as her as a teenager

least favorite?? i didnt feel any specific hatred towards any of the kids maybe bc i read the series for the first time as an adult (if yall didnt know from my older works i grew up a potterhead) and i cant be mad at kids acting like kids, but i would say uncle rick found more of his rhythm as the series progressed if that makes sense??? but it felt like a lot of push and pull on some tropes and like for example i felt like chris and clarisse getting together were random... thats just my stronger opinion at this moment in time lol

but what can i say coming from a fandom where the author is a transphobe and cant worldbuild for shit? name reveal why do yall think i go by jo 😭😭😭 its bc its actually joanne and when we yell at jk rowling i feel like we're yelling at me too 😭😭😭 are my opinions even valid

that was a ramble and none of it makes sense hope that helps

[wish-i-were-heather]

idk if this counts as a vent but its kinda long i just need to rant

so i told my friends im asexual yesterday.

im still struggling to figure out with my sexuality where i lie within like who im attracted to, but i do know that im at least ace. i mean i didnt tell them exactly, i didnt use the term asexual, but i told them i dont ever want to have sex and i dont really feel that kind of attraction.

theyre my two closest friends, and the first people ive ever told. really just cuz its never come up, its not like im actively hiding the fact. we were playing this game of would you rather, but it was a card game someone got me for my birthday so like you played it a certain way to fit the game idk. and one of them (which confused me bc it was rated 14+??) asked would you rather "give up swearing forever or give up sex for "do it" for 2 minutes every day or have a 30 minute makeout session every day. and they were supposed to try to guess what i would choose, and i said the latter.

and they were really surprsied?? like no i dont really wanna do that thats weird, and they told me oh thats not weird some people do that and i was like do they?? idk i just dont like that. and they were like ok whatever and we moved on. and then later there was another (i really do wonder why this is only rated 14+ bc 14 year old me would not like these questions) that said would you rather give up swearing forever or give up sex for 12 years.

and i chose the second obviously. ik i do online but irl i dont swear that much so that wouldnt be hard, but also im asexual so like thats easy lol. and they were trying to guess what i would choose and they both got it wrong and they were shocked. and i was like yeah i mean i dont have sex now?? and they were like yeah but youre a teenager now what about when youre older??? and i was like no i dont really want to, i dont ever really plan to have sex

and they were shocked. they thought i was crazy they thought i was joking. and they were like youre gonna change your mind and i was like no im not i dont want to have sex????? i never have??? like ive told you i dont want to have kids thats part of why.

and they were like but what about when you get married? dont you want a boyfriend? it would lead to that!! and its just so baffling to me that some people think that way. its absolutely absurd to me that i had to explain the difference between a romantic and a sexual relationship. like i told them theres plutonic, romantic, and sexual relationships, everything in between, and not one is higher or more important than the other.

and they were like "but what about when you get married? what are you gonna do?" uhh im gonna love them?? im gonna love my partner romantically and be happy with them and not have sex??? marriage doesnt need to include sex. "what are you gonna do after the wedding?" uhh go home and take a nap?? idk we can cuddle but im not insane for not wanting someone inside me thats nasty. (no offense yall im just sex repulsed).

one of them literally said "but once your relationship reaches a certain point you almost have to" AND I WAS LIKE NO WHAT THE FUCK YOU DONT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING EVER?? and they were like "i gUeSs". i told them id rather die than have sex like thats just not for me and they thought i was insane. they said if someone came up and said do that or die, youd die?? and im like yeah because if i dont want to then thats sexual assault and yeah id rather die than be sexually assaulted??? "what if your partner wants to and you dont?" then uhh if sex is that important to them we'll break up, i can respect their opinion and hopefully they can respect mine?? its not that confusing??

i dont know i just think its so weird to have that perspective in life. i guess its technically "normal" but the idea that all romantic relationship leads to sexual is weird. and the idea that giving up sex for 12 years is harder than not saying a few words is even weirder.

i mean the only good thing that came out of that whole conversation is i got over that imposter syndrome of not being "queer enough" because they acted like i told them i was an illegal alien getting transgender operations in prison

[kaz-playz]

I just read my old illiyork content. And it is SO BAD AND SO OOC. I get that every teenager needs their time to be cringe and wrong online but i thought i was past mine 😭. I think ive only had like one good take...... and it was who fell first and who fell harder one. YALL I THOUGHT WE WERE COOL WHY WLD U LET ME POST THAT 💀.

Im still the CEO im just managing the company better from now on. Jfc in one of them i made IL go to portillos and get my own order bcs i hate italian beef 😭 thats how yall know you you should have stopped me.

I think the only reliable source of mine for their content now is my ao3 bcs i wasn't influenced by interactions.....

My god. Thank you all for liking my content but it'll be getting a MASSIVE overhaul from now on

[sangonomiya-kokofish]

do NOT interact with nsfw content as a minor, especially with my content blatantly stating that are NOT allowed to read

it's incredibly dangerous, invading and disrespectful

You could have just privately dmed me about it.. no need be scared you know? And i respect your opinion aswell.. i write nsfw headcannons even if im a minor.. and what your saying it's dangerous,invading and disrespectful? I heard no such things- dangerous isnt the correct word hun.. i read nsfw cause im a science student.. i know thats not the best excuse but im also studying english and have to expand my vocabulary.. its not like my mother doesn't know.. you dont know who i am and what im allowed to read.. if you want you could have blocked me from your blog is all im saying.. and im a teenager turning 15..im not young to not know what sex is.. im.not young to not know what curse words are.. what im saying is feel free to block me.. or just inform me that you feel uncomfortable in my dms.. no need to be rude about it either...

@bedoballoons @lisya840 @princessshu yall seeing this shit?

[vividaway]

mini analysis on the finale

yall im not even gonna lie..........i liked the season 5 finale. the concept that these are teenagers who have been beaten and worn down to a crisp to the point of multiple mental breakdowns from both marinette and adrien.........like of course marinette didn’t tell adrien. she’s a literal child, and she loves him, and honestly? its really not her PLACE to tell him. emilie knows about gabriels involvement with the miraculous. nathalie knows about EVERYTHING. there are multiple ADULTS who can step in and talk to him about this, and they chose not to. multiple people have said it: of COURSE adrien deserve to know, and i will be very upset if they never write in him finding out. but it also seems excessively cruel to do that to adrien. as far as adrien is aware, his dad was trying. he thinks his dad is a man chiseled away by depression and grief, who turned towards his works to cope with the loss. he believes there was a turning point where his father started to try. he allowed him to go to school, to make new friends and go to their house, allowed him to quit, started to show up to school events, and finally started to show him affection. adrien is none the wiser on WHY, and it feels extremely cruel to take away what little happy moments he had left with his father. what is the bare minimum to us, is literally EVERYTHING to adrien, and to me, that does mean something. to me, seeing gabriel sacrifice himself for adrien and his wife-- means EVERYTHING. it is what differentiates an evil, unrecoverable person, from a dynamic character who was never meant to be a good person. we were never meant to like gabriel. he’s the villain! but that doesn’t mean we aren’t supposed to be sympathetic to certain aspects of his journey.  i really do think his character was written well. gabriel is a bad, unredeemable man, who did one good action. i personally can’t look at gabriel from season one and say, “he shouldve sacrificed his life in place of his wives life sooner”, it feels wrong. gabriel from season 1 was EXTREMELY different from gabriel from season 5. we see him change (for the worse) over the course of five seasons. 

and the thing about how gabriel is written is like, its realistic. gabriel isnt just a cartoon villain from some kids show, he show’s patterns of real life villains as well. the manipulation, the lying, the guilt tripping, the abuse-- all of it. and thats why, i understand why some people are pissed he got redeemed. but for me, i see the build up. lila has the photographs from gabriels house, and she knews he was monarch. on top of this, it seems like she’s the successor to the butterfly miraculous. people know what he did, and its not just the people on the good side. i don’t see gabriel staying a sympathetic figure for much longer. but all this being said, i dont think it was the worst. the pacing was great, and the animation was top tier for me. theres so many episodes where i can predict whats going to happen next, but i couldn’t with this one. some thing about it just felt....special. like if you showed alyssa from 2016 the finale, i could literally die. no need to show a peasant child, just showing Season One Era fans what happened and how it looks and we’d just. die. everything about it 10x better than we couldve imagined. the writing, the animation, the pacing, the score, the dialogue, the way the world has expanded and been built up and how often we’re interacting with “background characters”.  for once, it felt like i was watching a real show, with a plot that made sense, and wasnt a dumpster fire. but...from reading the #MLBS5Spoilers tag....yall do NOT agree with my sentiments! and thats okay! 

[suffarustuffaru]

Heinkel Astrea himself >:D

YALL REALLY WENT FOR ME WITH THIS ONE.... OKAY. LETS GO.

Sexuality Headcanon: i think it could be one of several possibilities. he could be straight... he could be on the aroace spectrum... he could be bi and not even know... but we do know what he is for certain..... hes louannasexual................................................

A ship I have with said character: heinkel/louanna PLS THEYRE MARRIED OKAY......... louanna really looked at the astrea family Baggage and still went "im still gonna marry this man <3".... and like the way heinkel speaks about louanna T^TT "reinhard is me and louannas treasure..." "dont take away louannas way home"... LIKE FUCK MAN..... heinkel may be a piece of shit now but he took like those marriage vows of like in sickness and in health SERIOUSLY. its been like twenty years and hes been searching for a cure for louanna all this time. it drives me BONKERS...

A BROTP I have with said character: ......................im pretty sure you know what im gonna say LMAO. YEAH. YEAH. ROWAN AND HEINKEL?? ROWAN IS THE BEST POSSIBLE BROTP THAT COULDVE EVER HAPPENED FOR HEINKEL. deadbeat alcoholic dads of extremely powerful teenage sons club??? theyre literally insane. i love how they first meet because its the most pathetic thing ever. like rowan just seeing heinkel half-dead in some ditch and just deciding to help this random ass guy??? rowan dragging heinkel away like when you grab a cat by its scruff??? heinkel going "this guy is smiling at me but its not mocking... i dont know what the fuck it means" because heinkel doesnt know what fucking FRIENDLINESS is anymore...... theyre insane. im excited for the development thats gonna come out of them meeting. they foil so much T^T

A NOTP I have with said character: anyone other than louanna :((((((((((((((( pls..... pls dont separate them shes already in a coma :((((((((((((((((((((((((( ......except ill make an exception for rowan and heinkel because. they have 95 mental illnesses and theyre ALWAYS making it everyone elses problem... theyd be so horrible together and i can only see it happening if theyre drunk and the world is literally gonna end. they are Terrible. but they Would be entertaining...

A random headcanon: heinkel gets sober in all the timelines where wilhelm is erased <33 because its like. wilihelm gets erased, heinkel and reinhards relationship is better, so its like.... things are a little better for heinkel now. obviously his whole complex feelings on reinhard are either lessened or erased entirely, but i also feel like heinkel got at least Some of his insecurities because of how wilhelm probably was as a dad. and bc wilhelms gone - WELP nice going heinkel half of your insecurities are gone!! so, well, maybe heinkel wants to be fully sober and present for reinhard now. he wants to be in reinhards life as his dad...

General Opinion over said character:

if i met him irl i would immediately pull a pridebaru and poison heinkel's drink. HOWEVER, i am also screaming and crying over heinkel's heartbreaking tragic corruption arc where he goes from a very earnest and hardworking person whos trying his best with all the shitty cards handed to him. and then he turns into *GESTURES TO PRESENT DAY HEINKEL*

i need him to get his shit together and have the most GRUELING, PAINFUL, NAIL BITING redemption arc of all time. he's just so fucking pathetic 24/7 it's like... like im sitting here and reading every scene hes in and im going, god hes like one of those sad dirty exhausted stray dogs you see backed into a corner and theyre just like growling and snapping at everything that comes close. like we vaguely know that its Possible for him to get his shit together at least a little bit (see: pride if), and we Know that heinkel used to be a very affectionate person to louanna and reinhard, and the fact that tappei said he'd make heinkel the mc if subaru didnt exist indicates that heinkels Probably gonna have some insane development, especially given the debut of the rowan-heinkel dynamic... i cant wait for it T^TT i just like how hes Terrible... but hes also clearly very human. what a well-written character. i hope he goes for anime onlys kneecaps in season three.