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#idk who this is for except for me and my friend but have it
malk1ns · 1 day
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hi, i’m pretty new to hrpf. i’ve seen a lot of rule 63 fics within the fandom - at least, a lot more in comparison to some of the other fandoms that i’ve been in. i was curious why people in the hrpf fandom like rule 63? i’m not as familiar with it 😅 thanks!
this is an interesting question! i haven't really looked to see if proportionally there are more rule63 fics here than in other fandoms, and i am by no means an expert—although i don't think anyone can claim to be an expert on why other people write what they write—but i thought about this all morning and i have a few theories!
for me at least (although i haven't written rule63 yet myself), writing fic is a lot about putting these guys in Scenarios. we have a pretty good idea of what they're (publicly) like, and i think RPF as a whole tends to focus more on 'how do the people in the story react' as opposed to 'how can the world of the story be built out'—because these are real people we're writing about (kind of...), to me at least it's more interesting to say, ok i 'know' sid and geno (or at least the way i like to write sid and geno when i'm not doing a specific characterization), what would my sid and my geno do if they were in scenario x, or if situation y happened to them. it's almost reactive, you know? less about let's build a story and plop these more static characters from fiction into them, more about how can i continue to evolve these real dudes who we've seen evolve over the years based on the situation i invented for them. i might be alone in that but the more i thought about this while i was vacuuming today the more it made sense to me, even though i don't think this is consciously how i was writing—i do think this is how i approach THIS fandom vs others i've been in.
so, rule63 is sort of....we know sid, we know geno. what if one of them was a girl? and it's such an INTERESTING scenario to put them in, because we know them basically exclusively in the context of the NHL, and the NHL is all men. so what is that like for a woman to be introduced into the ecosystem, especially at the stature sid and geno are? how does that change their reputation, their day-to-day, the way they interact with their friends and teammates and the media and the fans? we have SO much source material of how they are to build off, so tweaking gender is just another way we can put those guys in situations and extrapolate on what would happen.
does this make any sense at all? idk when i think about the girl sid fic idea i have a LOT of it is going to be about how is sid perceived and how does she move in this world that's all men except her, and how does that affect her. and i think when i put that together with what i was ruminating on this morning, it all sort of dovetails and makes sense. you know?
i'd be curious to see what other authors think about this though, both about how RPF is a little different from other fandoms and also rule63 within the hockey RPF space! hope y'all don't mind if i tag you and please don't feel obligated but if you do have thoughts i'd love to hear them...@beggingwolf @plethoriall @yabagofmilfs @cuprun @ellen-shame @al-the-remix @ticklefighthockey @puckluckie @cascara-soda this is by no means an exhaustive list please chime in if you see this and feel so inclined!
also let's not forget that sometimes you want to write idfic and sex and have you seen sid and geno's mouths i just know that they'd know how to use them on each other in the fictional world i build up. sometimes, as freud probably never actually said, a cigar is just a cigar. so to speak.
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blindmagdalena · 3 days
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Hello!
Wonderful "Eat Your Ego, Honey" got me wondering:
what would happen if Homelander was interested in a stripper?
She's known for her dancing and, he sensed, her secret superpower/-s. Would he be furious that a girl dances in front of some "dirty" men? Would he torture her for being afraid of him? Would he be uncomfortable with the smell of her sweaty body?
I literally see scene of meeting: she's dancing to gothic metal in the dim lights of the room; Homelander is freaking out, jealous and horny (because he feels like she's having a blast dancing).
Thanks for your fanfics, I adore it! Because of your headcanons I fell in love with Homelander and decided to watch the series...
anon. the absolute RABBIT HOLE you sent me spiraling down with this ask is genuinely insane. firstly tho, thank you!! i'm so happy you enjoy my work and have been inspired to watch the show! i hope you love it as much as i did.
okay, now, onto the meat of this. i can't imagine Homelander ever being in a strip club, but i absolutely can see Vought having a dancer supe who performs at shows! and then i started thinking about what kind of powers she might have.
(this got long. strap in.)
and okay. bear with me here. i have the FAINTEST memory of a kids show (something like goosebumps or are you afraid of the dark) where they told a monkey-paw type story of a girl who wished that everyone would like/love her. and of course this turned out to be a fucking nightmare. people were obsessed with her automatically to a scary degree and she was eventually swarmed and maybe killed by the aggression of the adoring crowd? i don't remember.
but that made me think about her power being something of that nature. a chemical that compels people to adore her. when she sweats, and that sweat evaporates off of her skin, it fills the air people in the vicinity inhale it. it's what makes her dances so incredibly popular! but too much exposure to her powers can cause, uh... scary side effects in people. make them deranged. obsessive.
she hates it. it's destroyed all the relationships in her life. it's pretty much inevitable that she'll eventually effect the people around her, and it either freaks them out to the point they break contact with her or creates a completely inauthentic infatuation with her. it's impossible for her to know if anyone actually likes her, or if they're just under the influence of her powers.
she, like Homelander, would know what it's like to be "loved" in the most hollow sense of the word.
how cut to Homelander who's present at one of these shows where she's dancing and oh my god something smells incredible. downright intoxicating. it calls to every fiber of his being and he follows the scent of it until he's close enough to the stage, and it shocks him to his core to realize it's a person.
except! Homelander is so fucking chock full of V himself that he's not wholly affected by her... idk, pheromones? whatever you want to call her aura of effect. but he IS intrigued by it. by her. by the way her body moves and how she seems to have cast a SPELL on the entire audience.
he expects he'll be able to get a chance to speak with her after the performance, but bafflingly, she gets the FUCK outta there as soon as her set is done. naturally he has to follow!!!!
and okay i just had so many ideas for this! i even thought of One Single Friend she has who's a fellow supe and, due to his own powers, he's immune to her effect. i haven't figured out how exactly. maybe he doesn't breathe the way normal humans do. or he has some kind of innate filtration that makes him immune to gasses and things. his supe name is something stupid like... The Filtrator.
speaking of which her supe name would probably be like. Enchantress. something that alludes to the charming effect she has. but her friend knows how her powers work and he playfully calls her The Perspiren. perspiring siren. 😭😂
anyways i think they could have a lot of really interesting parallels! and of course Homelander would be intensely possessive of her, but he's also a HUGE exhibitionist and i think he would get off on knowing how badly everyone wants someone that's his.
he wouldn't ever physically hurt/torture her, but he would of course become violent if his possession of her were challenged or threatened in any way. if anyone touched what's his, or presumed they could take her. anyone she showed interest in would definitely wind up dead.
can you tell that i thought WAY too hard about this.
idk if i would make this an oc or a reader fic. i feel like this could definitely work for my first proper supe!reader fic! it's got a ton of potential. thanks so much for sending this!
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penofwildfire · 1 day
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I hope Wyldfyre and Roby break up.
Not because I don't like them, I think they're super cute together and I hope we see more of them. But because I'm sick and tired of this thing shows do (particularly kid's shows) where two young teenagers start dating and then they just. Stay together forever. Oftentimes it's both of their first relationship, but they're expected to date eachother until adulthood and then get married have kids etc etc, the whole nine yards. It's boring.
Obviously this can happen in real life, hell my aunt and uncle met in kindergarten and always knew they'd end up together, and they've been married for 30 years with 4 adult children. And good for them! But they're very much the exception and not at all the rule.
One thing I really like about Lostshipping in particular is that it doesn't follow this rule. Geo isn't one of the Ninja, he's not a childhood friend of Cole's, he'd never even met Cole until the Merge, he's just some guy that Cole wound up meeting and caught feelings for, and that's so much more realistic! They're just adults who fell for eachother, and their relationship had plenty of time to grow and develop. I like that. I want more of that.
Back to Wyldfyre and Roby, I just really don't think their relationship would or should last very long. They're cute, yeah, but that doesn't make them a good idea in the long run. And to be honest neither of them strike me as people who care much about "the long run" anyway. I hope Wyldfyre gets a chance to date around a little, y'know? A bit like Kai in early seasons, except with more fleshed-out love interests who are actual characters instead of like. Screaming fangirls. Maybe they could even stop being cowards and make her bisexual. Idk. Just a thought.
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aroghoststuff · 1 day
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I know you people are discussing the new episode of danganronpa despair time but, what if we talk about something more important?
THE DRDT CAST PLAYING DRESS TO IMPRESS
(You are wellcome to tell me more headcannon)
I was talking to a friend about all the stuff that happened in the last episode and idk how I finished the conversation talking about them playing DTI so I want to sharing my thoughs.
Also, sorry if any sentence doesn't have sense, english is not my first language.
First of all, Arei is a constant player, the only time she doesn't play is because she is banned temporality for get into fights with other kids. But she is very good at it, she have all of the clothes unlocked and the VIP pass.
Whit is another who has play many times, not as much as Arei but yes. He and Arei started to hang up in the computer room to play it cause of boredom and little by little they started to introduce the rest in the game. So finally all of them play it time to time to kill time.
The first who fall into it was Levi, he was interested due to his talent and he gives the rest advice often about how to combine and stuff.
J was the last one to start play since, in her words, "That is so f#cking girly F#CK NO". Now she plays it but she only use the man model.
Arturo always gives one star to everybody (except J) and complains because the game doesn't let you put less
Rose is the best at combine colors
Hu tells everyone to stop using the pose 28th because is "inappropriate"
Veronika is so in about the dress to impress lore and Lana, the lady of the nails. Also, none knows how she always manages to not go with the theme but make weird creatures. She overanalyze the other peoples outfits
Since Teruko and Nico in the reality want to wear more feminine clothes they enjoy putting cute things.
Seeing that Charles does not strive and usually is in the lower position Whit encourage him and tells him to do duos
Xander is trying his best
David looks like he is trying his best but he is not
Whit also has the VIP pass btw
Min doesn't admit it but she is starting to have fun. Ace too
Normally when they finish playing is due to they start fighting
Eden buy the Madoka dress. She loves Madoka and thinks her dress is cute.
Levi tries to help Ace but he always ends with a disaster of an outfit.
That is all i have for now. Maybe later I continue with this.
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confused-much · 3 days
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My emotions are high right now so I may not think straight but let me get this straight.
EVERYBODY survived except Kashimo (who cares), Gojo and Choso.
KENJAKU/GETO lives and so does Takaba (or whatever his name is, I don't care at this point).
Gojo died fighting Sukuna just so others stood a chance against Sukuna later.
Yuta used his dead body to fight – and the guy didn't even do much to Sukuna. Gojo agreed because he view himself as a weapon – but that just means that no matter what, his students also thought of him as a weapon
Despite all of the above NO ONE grieves him (Choso isn't even acknowledged), KUSAKABE blames him for everything, and that's it
TSUMIKI (or rather her grave) gets a panel or two with Megumi and Shoko – but not Gojo.
The only person who even thought of Gojo in the last chapter was Yuji, but the context basically was for us readers: "forget about Gojo, don't you get tired of Gojo Satoru? there are other characters". Like yeah, no shit, Gojo would have high hopes for his students and for Yuji specifically but did we REALLY need to have Gojo himself stating "aren't you tired of Gojo Satoru?" (maybe it was a wrong translation, idk).
Overall, I'm so angry, sad, and disappointed with this manga. Yes, I wanted Gojo back, I was hoping for his comeback for a long time, but at some point I've accepted that it's over. But I never expected such treatment that Gojo would get after his death.
He was always just a weapon. His friend didn't even seem sad when she was asked to help Yuta use Gojo's body (something even Gojo acknowledged in that chapter). Gege had an opportunity to make Shoko say ANYTHING about Gojo during the Tsumiki grave scene, hell, MEGUMI, also could say anything!
But they didn't. Because Gege has a hate boner for Gojo Satoru.
Gojo poured all his heart and energy into growing and helping his students. He saved Yuta, he saved Yuji, he took care of Megumi, he was apparently friends with Shoko.
And yet no one grieved him. No one acknowledged his death. Fucking KENJAKU had a panel with Takaba indicating that he survived, but no, Gojo and Choso had to die... because.
And only Yuji ever remembers Gojo. Only Yuji said that he would not be able to forget Gojo Satoru.
And I didn't need much, you know? I just wanted people close to him to be sad about Gojo. People to reminisce about him. Someone to show that they cared about Gojo apart from his strength. But I feel that all his students just... Forget about him. True, Yuji is the protagonist so that's why he had that panel with Gojo, but what about Megumi? Why couldn't he show that he cared about Gojo? Why didn't we have at least a mention of Gojo from his lips?
Gege wasted one chapter at characters talking about what could and couldn't do against Sukuna and yapping about MVPs of the fight and such. Couldn't that chapter be used for something else? I know this is Jujutsu Kaisen and characters never grieve but, come on, those were the last chapters! This was the perfect moment to honour the dead, to acknowledge that Gojo Satoru was always more than his strength! For Yuji to be grateful that he could at least spent some time with Choso before his death! For Megumi to realise that he killed his guardian (well, Sukuna did in his body) and try to move past this trauma (by, for example remembering something that Gojo once told him or sth).
Idk. The ending is just lackluster for me. I can't say I hate it but I certainly don't like it. And it's not because Gojo is dead – I've accepted it, sad as it is. But because Gojo (and Choso) are THE ONLY ones that died. Sukuna was such a threat, the final boss, the one who was unbeatable... and yet with all of the characters surviving apart from Gojo and Choso, it just feels empty. The stakes that were during that fight don't exist anymore. Because how could Sukuna ever be considered a threat if almost all his attackers survived? He killed Gojo, why it was so hard to kill anyone else, people who were considerably weaker than Gojo? Yeah, I know Shoko is a good healer, and Ui Ui was there, but come on.
Well, now I guess I just stick to writing fanfics and pretend that all of this didn't happen. Who knows, maybe after anime ends, we all truly forget about Gojo Satoru and Jujutsu Kaisen.
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glittter-skeleton · 6 months
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Hello OUAT fandom, I bring you Emma’s emotional cheating in s4
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brainrotcharacters · 14 days
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the next thing they'll be involved with, Logan will be drinking and gets told by a non-Wade "I'm here to save you from Deadpool" or some funny shit like that. Toss in a mention about incursions or Wade's 'higher purpose' having no place for Logan. Watch Logan laugh.
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Just to minimize my chances of being genuinely misunderstood OR deliberately misinterpreted, and crucified for something I don't think, How Dare You Say We Piss on the Poor website etc...I'm gonna say this right up top. I absolutely understand why people don't like Thessaly as a character, if anyone does completely unironically stan her as some kind of feminist hero who Did Nothing Wrong uwu, I personally see it as a bit of a red flag. I don't like terfs real or fictional. In a vacuum, I could even completely sympathize and agree with the people who want her cut.
HOWEVER.
It's really something to me to see people clamoring for her to be cut, because she carries and expressed an ugly indefensible prejudice (transphobia) in words towards (1) person. Meanwhile Hob fucking Gadling enacted one of the most violent forms of antiblack racism I can even think of against thousands no, millions of people, the ripple effects of which still affect billions more today. Just a little light idk, profiting off the fucking slave trade and had to be told by someone else that it was bad...and he's a fan favorite.
People are saying Thessally being Dream's love interest reflects badly on him or is somehow endorsement by the narrative (?!?!?!?!?!? Didn't she (SPOILER ALERT AS IF IT MATTERS BY NOW) help participate in his extended assisted suicide? She's not painted as a great person to me just another character what are y'all SMOKING whatever fine. It's fine this is fine.) But shipping Dream with Mr. Former Slaver is not only not verboten or frowned on widely in the fandom but its THEE most popular pairing by far. So...why the difference?
Like where are the same fans who are saying Thessaly shouldn't just be more clearly shown to be wrong, she shouldn't even be in the show at all when it comes to Hobert's crimes??? Yes, transphobia is indefensible. Isn't racism?
And I hear the cries of "it's fiction!!!" Already rallying (if anyone who needs to hear this even sees it lol) to which I say:
HORSESHIT. I KNOW you don't, deep down, really agree because if you did, why get upset about Thessaly being included??? Why does what she said to one person matter if it's Just Fiction You Guyze. Fictional characters are allowed to do bad things and fiction isn't reality sweaty....except when you only apply that standard to fictional racists you like and simp for, but fictional transphobes you don't are SO HARMFUL they shouldn't even be portrayed in fiction.
Like. Give me a big fat BREAK. This looks like bullshit, no? I'm sorry, but I'd love for someone to try and give any other explanation besides one personally offended you or hit home for you, and the other doesn't.
And if that bothers you or you feel like it says something negative about you...idk what you want me to say??? You can't control how other people perceive you and that's how people outside this majority-of-the-fandom bubble see it. You don't need to respond, I just wish and genuinely hope this gives you a moment to think about why fans who ARE bothered by both (and not just paying lip service to being bothered by the one but railing against the other) are so frustrated with people saying everyone is welcome but in practice only bending over backwards for the comfort and emotions of themselves, and people they can easily relate to.
You don't have to like Thessaly (I don't. I find her an interesting antagonist, I don't stan her. And frankly imo likability is not. the point of her character) but you'll pardon me for feeling more than a bit cynical and side eying people's motivations for what seems a...pretty obvious double standard, on what fictional crimes related to real world issues matter to y'all, and which clearly don't. Either actually bring the same energy to the table for fictional people who committed atrocities, even if against a group you're not part of and thus don't feel the need to empathize with, or just carry on, but accept that you don't have the SLIGHTEST room to talk about cutting characters who do immoral things. And you also need to accept that you look like a hypocrite when you do.
#thessaly#wanda the sandman#hob gadling#I could've cried sexism!!! Problematic Male vs Female Characters except 1) I don't actually think that's the main reason *here*#2) there are WAY better examples of that particular double standard in this fandom#also i can admit when I'm a bit of a hypocrite or was.#i used to dip my toes into the dreamling stuff too early on#but idk. It just got too sour seeing ppl whitewash (lol I know I'm a comedian)#what he did over and over. And I genuinely had started to wonder#if the show hadn't included that particular crime and I'd just imagined it from the comics because#my memory is shit sometimes and I guess I was naive. I *wanted* to believe someone would talk aboutit#if it had made it in. but ultimately i went back and checked and no#and seeing how the whole fandom behaving affected my non-white mutuals some of whom...#like these are my friends man or ppl I just respect and I can't just. Ignore their feelings and their pov#and act like they werent making points or it doesn't matter#like it's all just fun and games for everyone on the same terms. And seeing how easy it was#for everyone to ignore was so unsettling. I couldn't keep pretending it was just fiction and didn't affect anyone real#Call me a bully a t3rf apologist (fuck you and for the record. no)#a puritan or a Fancop (actually stop comparing#people disagreeing with you online to what cops do. For fucks sake you just make it look like nothing is really real to you outside fandom)#whatever man. Whatever helps you sleep. I'm just gonna block you#if you're clearly sticking your fingers in your ears. engaging with you is a waste of time and energy then#Hell I have sympathy for anyone who doesn't like thessaly#especially trans fans. Especially rn. But lbr that sympathy for a lot of the white trans/queer fans only goes one way!!!#never gets extended to anyone else's issues. Like THATSthe issue. And it's shitty!#(sorry this post is not about me in the confessional lol that's why I put this at the bottom#I just had feelings to get out and yes its my blog but i didn't want to clog the airways)
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cupsy-daisy · 1 month
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Woagh! 2 posts in 1 day! (Saying this like it’s not uncommon) but have my tma sona!!! These drawings are a month or 2 old but i’m finally posting them!!
This is just my sona from season 1-3 the progression of it n stuff, there were some sketches of 4 and 5 but i never finished them, idk if i will! But idk! We’ll see!
I’m wanna ramble a bit about my sona so if you wanna read it’s under the cut! Grahh
Got the idea from bestie @catattack08 to make it so i got hired at first for redesigning the institute logo, Because i’m a freelance artist, but then i started working on organizing physical files n caseloads on the shelves n stuff.
Hired me (mostly) because i had severe connections to a lot of entities, i had been touched by several throughout my lifetime :p
Nothing major happened to me through season 1 and 2 besides being kinda wary about john and probably agreeing that he murdered leitner in season 3.
So like- my sona story is involved with my friends a lot- and my friend was leaning towards john being innocent so managed to keep contact with him and we both went to georgies house to deliver some books, and i came with them to make sure they didn’t get murdered cuz i was still under the impression he murdered that guy.
John went out for a smoke, got kidnapped, i stepped outside to “have a word” with him abt what really went on and breekon and hope saw me, said “no witnesses” and dragged me along too, i have some drawings of that if anyones interested aaghh
When we were both together we had some time to connect and understand eachother (or as best we could) i was kept for the sake of extra skin in case john didn’t “fit” but anywayss- we bonded a lot and this is probably where i would’ve (in super canon) died, nikola kinda using me as a decoration for the ritual.
BUT i dont think abt that cuz i wanna see what happens if i live, so instead, micheal almost leaves me for dead until helen comes along and letting john and me pass through her door, we both make it back and i gain a lot more mutual respect and understanding for him, we’re both decently good friends now, then everything kinda moves forward from then on.
Until peter comes in, this is already getting long enough but long story short, i was used as a practice dummy for the lonely kinda, and i couldn’t kill em, so i got sent to super hell where martin found me. Talked me out of it, withhh the poowerrr of friendshipppp/j
Thennn i either go back home to @catattack08 orrr i stay and they come, and those have 2 different routes but grahhh idk if i should put it here, feel free to ask!
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Anyone else just not feeling like a real person much lately?
#'lately' he says#as if he's not been feeling this way for the last 28 years#idk man#maybe it's bc I'm getting older and so are the people i hang/chat with#but it feels like everyone else has a real life and real interests and experiences and things to say#and I'm some kind of hollow scarecrow person just full of memory loss and sadness#i feel very stupid and very boring#which i know is too harsh. and i know i should be kinder to myself bc life and covid and shit can't have helped the brain situation#and i should absolutely believe my friends when they say they wanna hang with me bc it's mean not to take them at their word#but I'm still like... why though?#genuinely what's the appeal of being around me. my head is empty i have nothing to add and I'm not interesting or that funny#it's been creeping up on me. this feeling like i just genuinely have nothing to offer.#i don't even know who i am#except for a person who like. lives vicariously through fictional characters experiencing feelings I've never had cause to feel#i can relate to emotions SO vividly except i myself haven't even felt the half of them#i just sort of quietly exist somewhere on the spectrum between content and discontent#with occasional drops into the despair zone#and even if the stuff i think is keeping me here went away tomorrow. like if mum stopped being an issue and i was free#like... what would i even do?#i don't even know how to want something#anyway. this has been morning mental breakdowns with newt#I'm going to go make some made up guys live the life i haven't now#mr. bees speaks#negative
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becauseplot · 11 months
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i feel i should preface this with saying that this relationship analysis "takes place" before qcellbit's emotional exhaustion and motivation crash---
---but i have been having SUCH crazy thoughts abt the archivists (qcellbit n qphilza). guy who needs evidence of Everything 🤝 guy who takes pictures of and hoards Everything. two-cars-passing-each-other meme whenever cellbit (practically nocturnal at this point) makes a late-night run to the Ordo to grab some notes he left there and bumps into phil (trouble sleeping ever since the birdhouse incident) who's sitting in one of the evidence rooms organizing a new backpack of photos to hand over to cellbit.
"oh. hey phil." "hi mate."
their conversations and interactions center mostly around cellbit's investigations---the ones cellbit lets the public know about, anyway---and whatever new info phil managed to scoop up since the last time they saw each other. theories are exchanged, and photos are passed between them as easily as pleasantries. "how're you doing?" "oh, doin' alright, doin' alright. you?" "eh. busy, you know?"
they don't talk about much else.
see, they both understand secrets. intimately. things you did you would much rather leave behind you, if you can, or thoughts, worries, doubts you would much rather keep to yourself for fear of speaking them into existence. sealed lips; a tight lid. they look at each other and know they're only seeing what the other wants them to see, but that's okay. they get it. sometimes, it's just easier to focus on what is directly in front of you. what you can see, what you can touch; what you know is true, what you know is real.
what you can do.
so cellbit generates and bounces his theories off of phil, and phil is more than happy to be a sounding board. phil fills up a backpack with photographs, and cellbit is more than happy to take it off his hands. they focus on The Work, on the spiderweb of red string and loose ends and grainy pictures and scrawled notes pinned to the wall, madness-incarnate sprawled out before them. they trust each other's judgement, and they trust each other's skills, and they trust each other, and neither asks too many questions. they both appreciate it.
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questioning sexuality is so exhausting
#(edit: sorry for the rant in the tags and i just. i want someone to talk to me)#i keep on doing it for no apparent reason#someone was talking about lust yesterday and i realised today that.#even tho id thought i don't experience it. i possibly do. but exclusively towards women.#i hate it here!#for a multitude of reasons i will never have a relationship with a woman but! i may be incapable of having a relationship with a man!#at some point in the last few months i have abruptly pivoted from definitely wanting marriage and kids to being ambivalent on marriage#and not wanting kids. that's such an outlier in my life that it might just be a mental health thing tho idk#but at the same time i. want to be loved.#i don't know what i want anymore and im tired of questioning myself#i definitely overthink it but idk how to stop it#and i hate hate hate how the moral obsessions have bee lately#this isn't entirely related but it kind of is#like Am i a terrible morally bankrupt person for having certain thoughts or is it just religious ocd go brrrr?? am i overthinking it?#i don't know. i don't know!#for a while labelling myself as arospec ace kinda calmed that down but. i don't know#i do't want to be attracted to women. i don't want to have to look away so often. i don't want any of that.#but i don't know how to stop it.#i don't even know if i'm attracted to men at all.#this is a cry for help and encouragement and prayers no matter what your views on these matters are#queer stuff tag#i nearly fessed up to my friend yesterday about same sex attraction and i might've except that it would have probably outed me as#the person who anonymously sent in a question several months ago about the side b movement to a church thing#ive only told one person at church about any of that sort of stuff and it was very vaguely worded#also see: this friend is the mother of the boy i?? i don't even know how i feel about him#i increasingly think it wasn't romantic at all. but i don't know#i would love any encouragement you got. anything at all.#i don't know how much this stuff is affected by the fact that i consider myself unloveable and think it highly unlikely any boy will ever#care for me#now im rambling. sorry
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cosmicterrorthe8th · 7 months
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Another Grant headcanon:
I think he wrote love notes when in relationships, and he went all out with like making the paper scented and stuff. But like he had no good perfume so he ended up using his horrible body spray. So like the lucky boyfriend would like find a paper reeking of the body spray like every once in a while.
Also I think he was someone who fell deep into romance because having a crush and feeling butterflies in his stomach was better than numbness. So he would pursue every crush even if he knew it would not end well because of the thrill of it. I think this sucked but I think he atleast felt like this is a normal way for life to suck.
#honestly I was thinking he continued the note thing with marco in college maybe?#and now marco likes the smell of the body spray even if grant found better perfumes cuz nostalgia#i think i am in my own la dee da world after this episode#where I think if willy takes a break from torturing the parents they should form a circle and become bffs#they should form a circle#toast to rebecca#and then just talk shit idk#i think they would be very funny as a group after they are done grieving#like cassandra would be like how could I have dated such a loser#he literally kidnapped like four of my exs ex friends and put collars on them when we were dating#and they would be like no its not your fault he is that manipulative#and then one of them would talk about their ex to comfort her#and then somwhow it would come out that willy is like the age of their grandparents#and cassandra would be like why did this senior citizen get me so bad#he told me to make him a sandwich and I#a multimillionaire made him a sndwich#this will probably never happen in canon#dndads#grant wilson#dungeons and daddies#the tags are their own seperate post at this point#dndads s2#looking back on this(tags)#all the spouses knew willy as a nice guy who saved them#rebecca was the only one who suspected him so thats why he killed her#they must be feeling so duped getting tortured except for marco who saw him kill a man#cassandra has been feeling duped since heaven#this is killing me all of them are having conversations in my head now the comedy and the pain is killing me mostly the comedy#marco li wilson#grant li wilson
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eikichi-supremacy · 6 months
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hey so do you think wtv keiko had to deal with growing up with yusuke could be considered a type of parentification
#god chapters where barely anything happens except a character's realization about things can be hard ...#im writing another keiko pov chapter and it's hard because well!!#keiko was never really a main focus in the series and as time goes on she gets even less of a focus so i have to fill in these spots#in her personality and views that aren't really explored. im taking a lot of liberties lets say#and idek if it's gonna read as in character cos of that#anyway im tryna say that like. pre series keiko was basically this presence in yusuke's life and he saw her as a pain but he cared#she was there to scold him and cajole him into going to his classes and she was his only friend#now we know atsuko was negligent and idk how involved the yukimuras were in his life but i feel like keiko#whether directly or indirectly was given this duty like you have to keep him outta trouble#you're smart you're mature he needs someone like you. this responsibility just kind of put on her before she can understand the weight of i#and she can't really comprehend that weight until it's abruptly taken from her. yusuke dies and there's no one to shepherd#i feel like keiko should get to be mad about this. this realization of the nature of their dynamic. keiko planning things around yusuke#who's never done that in his life. not because he's purposely being thoughtless but bc he was never the one to have to plan#to think about what their future looks like. he just kinda drifted along and keiko tried to do damage control. it wasn't fair#yusuke is keeping secrets from her she is scared of high school and that he'll die again without her knowing why and it's unfair#so she should get to be mad also because girls getting to be mad is one of my favorite things 👍🏼#the realization that yusuke won't be lost without her so she shouldn't hinge her life on the expectation that he will be#she worries about yusuke a lot i think. especially after he comes back from the dead. and i think kuwa's presence would help ease that#dread in her heart. it doesn't have to be just me. there's someone who can be there with him always and it doesn't have to be me#the guilty relief of not having to be the sacrifice. but kuwa doesn't mind so maybe it's okay this way#idk just rambles about my fic while i puzzle out how to word it#character analysis#yukimura keiko#yu yu hakusho
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jichanxo · 10 months
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kitakata sensei au stuff [from sept/2023]
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spookykestrel · 6 days
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The problem with not having your mom close anymore is that when things are going wrong in your life, everyone stops at just saying they're sorry and no one asks how they can help there's only so much a sad face text can do when the real cure is a hug or someone bringing you ice cream or just asking you to come over for a movie yk?
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