#but at the same time i. want to be loved.
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‘he wouldn’t do that’ well maybe if i gave him a blanket and some hot chocolate he would soften up and let me cuddle him im sorry my imagination is too great and that my sweetheart personality could provide comfort to these emotionally wounded men (i don’t want to fix them i just want them to be themselves while i teach them the names of all of my plushies)
thinking of: Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley, John Price, Silco, Viktor, Din Djarin, Nanami Kento, Bucky Barnes, Logan Howlett, Scott Summers, Bruce Wayne, etc.
'he would not fucking say that' maybe he would if he knew he was starring in his very own porn fic for the sole purpose of delighting some freaks on archive of our own dot org. maybe he'd play it up for the cameras. ever consider that
#mickey’s thoughts#I’m crazy just ignore me#they would fall in love with me tho#i just have to try hard enough#‘let me hug you’ and they would fall to their knees#emotionally pent up men are my weakness#like yes using a punching bag is nice#but have you held a plushie really tight before#we can be soft and strong at the same time bby#I’m such a sucker for complete opposites trope#i want a man who is the opposite of me fr#I’m talking black cat#to match my golden retriever#sighhhh#i’m too gay for this
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The alt-right's foothold into Gen-Z is frustrating and I can see from over here how they're doing it.
You've got a generation of young-adults who are learning to be adults for the first time and for so many of them it sucks. It sucks to be in your first shitty apartment where things break, and to have your first shitty car that needs maintenance, and to be working a low-paying service or retail job where you get berated all day and barely scrape by. And you go home and you have taxes to figure out and electric bills to figure out and a screen on your phone to rot into to destress.
And this is men and women, equally, in this spot. But the alt-right messaging gets to tailor their approach to gender.
And hey women, yes you working a shitty job for shitty pay, overwhelmed by financial responsibilities and car repairs, what if you actually didn't need to do ANY of that? You don't need to. And you don't need to feel guilty about it. (You're not quitting, you're not being lazy), you actually are just embracing the chance to be exactly who an ideal woman should be. You should actually be beautiful, and demure, and barefoot in a sunny kitchen, glowing, pregnant, hearing the joyful sounds of your children while you bake a roast for your wonderful husband (strong, protective, loves you, handles the finances, handles the jobs, handles all the things you hate). OUR ancestors (don't mind the dogwhistle) did this for GENERATIONS, and modern society has failed you instead!
It's offering to break women out of all the parts of their real life that suck, and do it in a way that promises they're actually being better, being more admirable, more moral, more respectable, more correct, can feel good about, can feel proud about, as a Woman as Feminine as Mother as Goddess.
And the thing being promised does not need to actually reflect reality. It's a fantasy. It is not real. For every "beautiful demure barefoot" day, you'd be having another one covered in shit changing diapers of screaming infants with screaming children while your husband ignores you because it's Women's Work (take pride!) But that doesn't matter. It just needs to sound better than the reality they're living.
Then the men are targeted too. And it's the same in that it's getting to them by appealing to pride in their gender, but the messaging is different. It's "those finances are hard but ACTUALLY you're leveling up, you're grinding, you're finance maxing." It's hard but it's the kind of hard that is a challenge you can WIN at, boast about, post about, prove your manliness. Knowing cars, knowing home repairs, knowing taxes, that's your MAN pride, and you are so elite, you are so sigma, you are the envy of everyone, you are a masculine man. Women love you. Women will defer to you. Strong, respected, moral, loyal, unshakeable. Unlike those pansy men (mind the homophobic dogwhistling) who will whimper and cry like girls. You are better.
The shitty retail job is actually humble beginnings because you're minmaxing your way to financial success (bitcoin, crypto, investments). You can sleep with any woman you want as long as you're confident, and then you'll find one who understands how smart and confident and strong and protective you are and she will defer to you as her man. She will birth your children and teach them good morals and you will make it. Our ancestors lived this way for generations (dogwhistle) and modern society took it from you.
And with that messaging it makes it clear who the enemy in all this is - modern society that has convinced women to torture themselves with high education and terrible jobs, turned them Ugly with Ugly opinions and bad hair and nasty attitudes, yelping about "rights" and "equality" (pitting them against men! TAKING things from men!) All the while, society has been trying to emasculate men--replace them with women, make them soft and emotional, make them gay, make them WEAK. We've been made WEAK.
The naive women hearing this go "I'm not ugly! I don't hate men! I DO hate my job and my finances. I've been tricked. I'm actually rebelling by declaring my goal is to get a Perfect (White) (Christian) moral husband who will make all our decisions and protect me and our children." (And when she's financially trapped in an abusive marriage...? When she's suicidal with PPD but her husband won't touch that because it's Woman Hysteria...? And when her husband leaves her for someone who was as hot as she was 20 years ago and now she's figuring out finances, health care, taxes, bank accounts for the first time in her life...?)
And the men go "They've been TAKING things from us for too long! It's time to be men again! It's time to take pride! I am strong and confident. I am in charge! I never show weakness!" (And when he's got a gun to his head due to the depression he's never been allowed to talk about as Women Feelings...? And when he's financially ruined from a crypto scheme that stroked his ego and robbed him blind...? And when he's dead from alcohol poisoning and none of his adult children notice because no one's spoken to 'Dad' in 15 years...?)
And it's so hard to fight because you're arguing against a fantasy. How do you disprove their fantasy? It's so hard to explain to them, hey you're working a shitty job where you have no future because the rich bastards took it all from you. And now you're doing their work for them. You hate society because of what they've done to it and now you're doing their work. Now you're targeting groups who've never done anything to harm you and the guys responsible are laughing to the bank. How do you explain? How do you disprove fantasy?
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thats my name?
nanami's daughter went through an identity crisis at the age of four.
you were teaching her how to write her own name. she happily exclaimed that she can do it herself, after all papa taught her all the alphabets. she clumsily jot down her supposed name and showed it to you, looking very much proud
suethart nanami
you were confused but told her this was not her name. she looked up at you with confused big doe eyes, the color the same as your husband's
"but thats what papa calls me?"
you chuckled behind your hand and explained to her what her actual name was and how it wasnt sweetheart. she looked so devastated that you almost wanted to rename her.
"no, its sweetheart!"
later that evening, before nanami could even announce he was home and put out his shoes, his daughter went to him running
"papa! whats my name??" she asked very firmly, with arms crossed and brows furrowed
he raised his eyebrow at you to see if it was another tiktok prank where he was supposed to call her 'my princess' (hed gladly do that). you just shrugged your shoulders at him, looking very much done. he fondly huffed, things are always so chaotic with you two, but he wouldnt have it any other way. he smiled softly and patted his baby's fluffy haired head
"sweetheart, at least let me put out my shoes first-"
she cheered happily and threw herself in nanamis arms. out of instinct, he held her, with all the gentleness in the world.
"see mama?? i told you my name was sweetheart!!" she then proceeded to give you a 'i told you so' look
nanami, still very much confused and not out of his shoes looked at you, asking for help. you just sighed heavily
later during dinner time, you and nanami both taught your baby about real names and pet names. she got so pouty after she learnt that her name was neither sweetheart nor baby nor honey, it was taking nanami a lot of willpower to not her rename her sweetheart and bring back her sunny smile. but you reassured her that to you guys she will forever be 'sweetheart'. she lit up at your words and proceeded to happily munch her food
nanami blinked. well that was easy.
tho she had another breakdown when she found out that your name wasnt actually 'my love'.
#nanami x reader#nanami x you#nanami x y/n#nanami kento x reader#nanami fluff#nanami kento x you#nanami x reader fluff#jujutsu kaisen x reader fluff#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jjk nanami#ohmynanami
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The Primary Bedroom with En-Suite (CC Pack for The Sims 4)
When I started working on this set, I wanted to create a bedroom that felt like a true retreat—somewhere cozy, stylish, and practical at the same time. That’s why the en-suite was such an important part of the design.
Having a seamlessly connected bathroom adds a touch of luxury and makes the space feel complete, just like in real homes. From the rain shower with a massage cord to the double sink setup and rounded bathtub, every piece was designed to bring comfort and functionality together.
The bedroom itself features a four-poster bed with soft, warm bedding, a matching nightstand, a cozy bench, and a nice wood dresser, all in warm tones that complement the en-suite perfectly.
I made a separated sheer canopy, which can be placed under the bed frame to create a light and airy feel. This lets you customize the space even more, giving you the option to keep it open or add a dreamy, elegant touch.
Small details like a pampas-filled vase, soft lighting, and framed artwork help tie everything together, making it easy to create a relaxing and inviting atmosphere.
I’d love to see how you use it in your builds—tag me in your creations! 💛
GET EARLY ACCESS HERE
#Sims 4 bathroom#Sims 4 bathroom vanity#Sims 4 best CC#Sims 4 black faucet#Sims 4 Build CC#Sims 4 build mode#sims 4 cc#Sims 4 CC furniture download#Sims 4 contemporary bathroom#Sims 4 cozy interiors#sims 4 custom content#Sims 4 custom sink#Sims 4 decor#Sims 4 detailed CC#Sims 4 detailed furniture#Sims 4 download#Sims 4 elegant bathroom#Sims 4 farmhouse bathroom#Sims 4 farmhouse sink#Sims 4 farmhouse style#Sims 4 free CC#Sims 4 furniture#Sims 4 furniture CC#Sims 4 high-quality CC#Sims 4 high-quality furniture#Sims 4 home improvement#Sims 4 home renovation#Sims 4 industrial bathroom#Sims 4 interior design#Sims 4 luxury bathroom
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So good! The brush that is used is so gentle and smooth , like a thin pencil line. It suite this piece for sure! Perfect match with suguru’s mood! I’m literally in love with everything, especially the hair! Aaaahh the way it’s slightly messy (づ> v <)づ♡
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#he is the true beaty#I would literally fall in love with him at first sight#I wanna listen to music and dance with cup of ice coffee in our hand#I want him and summer#summer would be so sad and sweet at the same time with him#𐙚 tiramisu art gallery#Suguru geto#jjk
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Are We Still Friends? — Part Six
Pairing: Reader x Azriel
Summary: The night of the gratitude banquet arrives. Your life will never be the same after it.
Warnings: insecurity and overthinking, deep introspection, reader processing every feeling ever, IC friendship dynamics, Az is in his jealousy era, reader chewing him out, a kiss, a confession and more!!
Word Count: 12.6k (happy finale!)
Part Five | Series Masterlist
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
The days slipped by quickly. You spent most of them in your head, avoiding social interactions except for the ones you deliberately made time for—helping Adrin pick out his clothes for the banquet and shopping for a dress with Mor and Feyre. Azriel had been busy. You hadn’t seen him.
You felt guilty for being relieved. But you were. You couldn’t handle seeing him.
It hit you last night, after Mor dropped off your dress—neatly wrapped in its protective bag—and you crawled into bed. When your gaze landed on your wrist, on the hair tie still there, everything suddenly became clear. You couldn’t run anymore. You couldn’t ignore it.
You were in love with Azriel.
There was a certain discomfort that came with realizing you had been walking through your life half-blind. Like a fog had lifted, revealing a path you had already been traveling, except now you could see it for what it was. And you wondered—how long had this been true? How long had you been this blind?
All these years of knowing Azriel, of loving him in some way—platonically, protectively, whatever it was—you had never truly seen it. But now that you did, you couldn’t unsee it. And it ached. Deeply.
Your fingers pressed absently against your sternum, rubbing small circles over the bone as you made your way down the hall. Over and over, like it might ease it. Like you could massage the feeling away.
You knew better.
It didn’t subside. If anything, it settled deeper, curling into your ribs. Lingered. Even as you reached the kitchen—and faltered.
Because you heard him.
A quiet hum, soft and unhurried, the way he always did on slow mornings when he thought no one was listening. And his shadows—they slipped past the doorframe, curling like wisps of ink, reaching. They knew you were there. They always did.
You thought about leaving.
But before you could turn, the humming stopped. A beat of silence. Then—
“Y/n?”
You exhaled sharply, bracing yourself before stepping inside.
Azriel was already watching you, his expression unreadable for a moment before it shifted into something softer. Familiar.
“Good morning,” you murmured.
He smiled—small, easy, like nothing between you had changed. Like your world hadn’t tilted on its axis.
He lifted a cup in offering. “Tea?”
You accepted it with a quiet thanks, leaning against the counter as Azriel took a seat, his own cup cradled loosely between his fingers.
Silences like this weren’t unusual. They were often comfortable—the kind of quiet that settled when you were both still waking up and bracing for the day ahead. But this morning, it was different.
Azriel glanced at you. “You okay?”
You were almost tempted to laugh at the question, but you suppressed it.
You nodded, exhaling. “Yeah. Just… lots on my mind.”
He hummed in understanding. His gaze had yet to leave yours.
A beat passed. Another. You shifted your weight against the counter, eyes flicking down to your cup. “You ever feel like you have too many thoughts, and it’s just… disorienting?”
“Yeah,” he said quietly. “I know exactly what you mean.”
Another stretch of silence. It wasn’t quite tense, but it wasn’t easy, either. Then, after a moment, he cleared his throat. “So, tonight…” He hesitated. “I was wondering if maybe you’d want to get something beforehand. I’m assuming the finger food will be too extravagant for us, like usual.”
You hesitated. His words were fumbling a little, but you didn’t think too much about it. You had been overthinking everything lately.
“I would, but I’m actually bringing someone tonight,” you said. “I’ll be waiting for him.”
Azriel stilled. “Oh.” His head tilted slightly. “You’re bringing a date?”
“It’s not exactly a date. I just asked him to come with me.”
Azriel nodded slowly. “Who?”
“Adrin. I invited him the other day.”
“Adrin,” he repeated, like he was testing the name on his tongue. “Madja’s apprentice?”
"That's the one."
You could practically see the wheels turning in his head, but he said nothing at first, just watched you, his shadows flickering across the floor like they knew something you didn’t.
He studied you like he was waiting for something more. When nothing came, he frowned, his voice turning cautious. “And he’s coming with you… tonight?”
“Yeah,” you replied, “I thought it’d be nice. He’s helped us before. He's nice.”
Azriel didn’t say anything, but you saw it—in the way his breath hitched, in the flicker of hesitation in his eyes. He had something to say.
You exhaled sharply. “Okay. What is it?”
His gaze shifted, like he was considering denying it.
“Hm?” he hummed, feigning innocence. “Nothing.”
You leveled him with a look. “Az.” A beat. “Just spit it out, yeah?”
A frown tugged at the corner of his mouth. “I don’t know. It just feels... strange, don’t you think? I mean, inviting him to something like this?”
You bristled at the words, at the insinuation that you needed a reason to bring someone. Needed to justify it to him.
“Az, it’s just a regular banquet, and I wanted to invite someone. That’s not a crime.”
“I didn’t say it was.”
"Then what is this judgmental look you have?" Your voice came out more defensive than you meant. “I’ve known him for a while. It’s not like he’s a stranger.”
“Yeah, but it’s not like it’s just some casual get-together, either.”
You hated that this conversation made you wish for something else. Made you wish it was a date. A real one. That tonight was light and exciting—the kind of night that made you blush, that made you feel wanted. The kind of night that made you feel like someone falling in love, not someone realizing they already had. So deeply, so entirely unreciprocated that you hadn’t even noticed it had happened.
“I’m not making some huge statement by inviting him. It’s just a banquet.” You swallowed, forcing the irritation down. “A banquet to show appreciation for those who help us. I thought it’d be nice. He’s helped us before, you know that.”
You thought back to what Azriel had said about not wanting to be the last one standing, like love, companionship, was a prize to win before someone else did. A race. And maybe, mentioning you were bringing someone made him defensive, made him feel like he needed to be looking again. The thought made something bitter rise in you. Something akin to embarrassment.
Azriel didn’t reply right away. When he finally spoke, there was a resignation in his voice. "Right. I do know that."
You couldn’t find the right words to reply, so you settled for silence once more. You finished your tea, rinsed out the cup, and set it in the sink. You felt his eyes on you as you turned and told him, “I think, for now, maybe we should stay out of each other’s personal lives. Not comment on any romantic prospects.”
It sounded like a good idea—like a boundary you could hold, something to protect yourself.
But Azriel’s expression flickered, a discomfort settling across his face. “So Adrin is a romantic prospect?”
You huffed, shaking your head. “Well, that's not–that’s not the point.” You pressed your fingers to your temples, willing away the irritation clawing at you. Then you dropped your hand, looking at him again. “Way to pick and choose what you hear, by the way.”
"I'm just clarifying."
"Look. I know I was right about Selene. But I think we have very different approaches to our personal lives.”
“I don’t think that’s true.”
You tilted your head slightly, studying him. "Well, I do. It might be better for us to keep our opinions to ourselves."
Azriel blinked. Then, quietly—“I don't want you to keep your opinions to yourself.”
Your breath caught.
His voice was careful, his fingers curling slightly around his cup. “Your opinion is the most important thing to me.”
And then your chest tightened. Azriel couldn’t say things like that to you.
The words slipped out before you could stop them. “Maybe it shouldn’t be.”
Silence.
Azriel’s grip tightened around his cup.
You swallowed. “I should go.”
And with Azriel’s eyes still following your every movement, you left— the ache in your chest even deeper than before.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
The entrance to the banquet hall was a grand display of velvet-draped archways and soft golden faelight. You spotted Adrin just beyond the doors, hands tucked neatly behind his back, his casual, loose, linen clothes traded for deep navy formalwear. He looked up as you approached, a large, bright smile forming.
"You clean up well," you teased, stopping beside him. "I could’ve picked you up from your apartment. Like a proper date."
Adrin huffed a quiet laugh. "And risk making the citizens of Velaris burn with jealousy over how we look together? I’d never be so cruel."
You rolled your eyes and laughed. The lightness of the sound surprised you. "I suppose we do look rather stunning."
His gaze lingered for a moment before he said, softer, "You do. That dress is quite beautiful."
You barely resisted the urge to fidget, instead smoothing your hand over the fabric.
Mor and Feyre had helped you get ready at the river house, the way they always did before events like these. The three of you, despite everything—despite mates, despite growing older, despite how much life had changed—still made time for it. A tradition you refused to let go of. It was something sacred, in a way. The girlhood none of you had ever really gotten to experience, stolen by war or circumstance.
You suspected Mor had noticed you were in your head more than usual, that something about tonight felt different. She kept checking in, little glances through the mirror, hesitation when you’d asked her to help pin your hair up. Her fingers had lingered as she tucked the final strands into place, ensuring the hairpiece she used hid the infamous hair tie beneath it. She hadn’t asked, but you could feel the question lingering in the way she looked at you.
“Mor chose it for me,” you said, offering Adrin a playful curtsy. "I’ll let her know her taste is still undefeated."
A few more guests drifted past.
"This home is beautiful," Adrin murmured, his gaze sweeping over the high ceilings and intricate paintings covering the marble walls— all painted by Feyre herself. "I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. Your High Lord and High Lady have elegant tastes. I must admit, I feel slightly out of place."
"It’s just another event," you said lightly. "Don’t let the elegance scare you. Most of the guests already know you, anyway. The ones that don’t will have the pleasure tonight. Nothing to stress about."
Adrin exhaled, adjusting the cuff of his sleeve. "I wouldn’t say I’m stressed. Out of practice seems more fitting. I haven’t been to many events like this."
"Oh? Does Thesan not throw many?"
He tilted his head. "Some. But even then, I wouldn’t attend. Not everyone is as close to their High Lord as you."
You blinked. "I never thought of it like that."
Adrin smiled faintly. "It’s not a bad thing. It’s quite beautiful, really. It humanizes Rhysand—far more than the stories some might hear about Night."
For you, Rhysand had never been just High Lord—he was Rhys, the friend who stole the last pastry off your plate just to be an ass, who gave the best advice when you needed it most, who once drunkenly tried to shove more marshmallows into his mouth than Cassian. You knew he was powerful. Knew that the weight of his title was immense. But it was easy to forget. Easy to take for granted just how rare it was to have a ruler who felt like family. A ruler who was family.
“I appreciate your open mind. It’s not easy for many people to see past Rhys’s past.”
Adrin’s eyes softened. “I can see the heart beneath the power.”
You glanced around the hall, watching as laughter and conversation rippled through the guests. When you turned back, you caught Adrin scanning the crowd as well. You took the spare moment to examine him further.
Adrin had the kind of beauty that belonged to the quiet hush of morning. His golden-brown skin carried a softness—not kissed by the sun, but by first light, the gentle warmth before the world fully woke. Vitiligo traced around his right eye, trailing down his cheek, leaving a streak of white in his dark curls. Even his eyelashes and brow were dusted pale. There was nothing severe about him, nothing unreadable.
You wondered how many admirers he must have. How many people in the streets of your city turned to gawk when he passed. How many hearts he’d left broken when he left his home and moved to Velaris.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you,” you said, drawing his attention back to you. When his warm eyes met yours, you continued. “What made you come here? From Dawn?"
He titled his head, taking a moment to collect his thoughts.
"When I heard that Night and Dawn were fostering more exchanges—trade, apprenticeships—I jumped at the chance," Adrin said. "It seemed perfect. It’s been an honor to train under Madja, to learn from one of the most talented healers of all Fae alike." He shot you a look. "I have you to thank for that opportunity."
You raised a brow. "Me?"
"I heard it was your diplomacy that strengthened those relations between our courts," he said. "That made Velaris known for the oasis of opportunity it now is, rather than the secret gem of Night it once was."
You hummed, a smile pulling at your lips. Even now, after all these years, it still felt nice—validating—to be acknowledged for your work. For the vision you had continually strived to achieve for your court, for Prythian.
"Well then," you mused, "you’re welcome."
It was fascinating, really—how simple his answer had been. That he had made the choice to leave home with such certainty. You didn’t think you could ever do the same.
"Do you miss the Dawn court?"
Adrin exhaled, thoughtful. "Yes, but not how you might think. I rather love change." He glanced at you, curiosity flickering in his expression now. "Do you?"
"What—miss Dawn?"
He laughed. "No. Do you like change?"
The answer should have been easy. You’d never been afraid of new things—your entire life had been built on pushing forward, on carving out space where there was none. But lately, change felt like something different. Like something looming. Like something you weren’t sure you wanted.
You fought the urge to glance over your shoulder, to scan the crowd for a familiar figure wreathed in shadows. You hadn’t seen him since this morning.
"No, actually," you admitted. "I despise it. I know it’s necessary for growth, but… I like things the way they are. I don’t think I’d want to leave my court. Not for long."
Adrin nodded. "With a life like this, I’m sure I wouldn’t either."
You let the words settle between you for a moment before exhaling. "Come on. Let me introduce you around."
Adrin extended an arm, eyes gleaming with humor. "Lead the way, shepherd of change. I am your sheep for the night."
You chuckled, looping your arm through his as you stepped into the light.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
Adrin had slipped easily into conversation with Cassian and Nesta, asking them about their mating ceremony with a curiosity so good-natured even Nesta had warmed to him. You’d been content just standing there, watching as he made the connections you’d hoped he would.
When he left to get you both drinks, you lingered, half-listening to Cassian’s exaggerated retelling of something Nesta had told him from a recent book of hers. Your eyes drifted across the scene—the candlelit tables, the swirling gowns, the food laid out in delicate arrangements that looked more like art than a meal. Unlike most elaborate events Rhysand and Feyre threw, tonight had hors d'oeuvres that actually appealed to you. You made a mental note to try some of the rosemary and honey tartlets once your stomach felt less uneasy.
You let your gaze drift once more, scanning the crowd without much thought—until you saw him.
Azriel.
For a second, everything else faded. The music, the conversation, the clinking of glasses. The world narrowed to the space between you and him.
He looked good—unfairly so. He’d cleaned up well, the sharp lines of his suit making him look effortlessly put together, dark hair styled just enough to look like he hadn’t tried at all.
If Adrin had been handsome in a way that was warm, inviting, then Azriel was beautiful in a way that stole the breath from your lungs. It was gut-wrenching, disarming, the kind of beauty that felt borderline sacred.
And gods, the way he was looking at you. Not just looking. Watching.
Your stomach flipped, something deep inside you tightening painfully. The air between you stretched thin. Humming. Waiting. It made your fingers twitch at your sides, made your feet shift like they might carry you forward without your permission.
And yet, somehow, you couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think—
“Here you are.”
The moment shattered. You blinked, the noise of the banquet rushing back in as Adrin reappeared at your side, pressing a glass of champagne into your hand. You took it with an appreciative smile, downing half of it in one go and ignoring the way your fingers trembled around the delicate flute.
Adrin turned back to Nesta, launching into another carefully respectful question, something about her Valkyrie training, but you barely heard it.
Not until Adrin nudged you, drawing you back. “Should I be concerned?” he murmured.
You blinked. “About?”
“That the Shadowsinger is currently glaring at me like he wants me dead. Have I offended him?”
Confused, you followed his gaze—
Azriel was still watching. Only now, the look was different. The sharpness of it, the intensity—it was aimed at Adrin.
A full glare.
You barely swallowed down the sound of disbelief that threatened to escape. What the hell was his problem?
Heat rose to your face. You forced yourself to breathe, to roll your shoulders back. “It’s nothing,” you muttered, waving it off. “Don’t worry about it.”
But when you turned back, Nesta was looking at you. A direct, knowing look. You glanced back at Azriel, still staring, then back at her. She knew.
You gently brushed your champagne flute back into Adrin’s hands. “Excuse me for a minute?”
"Of course," Adrin said easily, though concern flickered in his warm gaze. Nesta took the opportunity to step in, calling over Gwyn—a plan you’d both briefly gone over before the night began.
"Adrin," she said, "let me introduce you to my friend and fellow Valkyrie."
Adrin’s voice drifted after you as you stepped away.
“Oh, by the Mother, is that an Invoking Stone?” His breath caught, reverent. “Beautiful—I’ve only ever read about them.”
You didn’t need to turn to know Gwyn was smiling, could already picture the soft pink dusting her cheeks. But the moment barely registered, drowned out by the weight of the gaze still burning into you.
You had more pressing matters.
You didn’t spare Azriel a glance before grabbing his forearm and dragging him into the nearest empty room.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
Azriel barely moved as you pulled him in, letting you manhandle him like a bag of heavy rocks. His brows had only just begun to furrow when you spun on him, still gripping his wrist. His skin was warm beneath your fingers, the corded muscles of his forearm shifting under your grip—but you refused to let that distract you.
Not now.
It took you half a second to realize where you had dragged him. A library. A new one, judging by the scent of fresh wood and the pristine bookshelves lining the walls. You hadn’t even known this room existed. Your gaze flicked over the tall windows, the deep blue rug, the shelves still waiting to be filled. You hadn’t explored the house since the construction finished, too preoccupied with—
No. Focus.
You turned back to Azriel, finally letting go of his wrist. His wings twitched slightly, and his shadows curled at his feet like smoke, their edges sharper than usual.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” you demanded, crossing your arms.
Azriel blinked, his head tilting slightly. “What?”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about.”
“No,” he said flatly. “Or else I wouldn’t have asked.”
A heavy breath caught in your throat as the words lodged themselves somewhere between your teeth and the pit of your stomach. Azriel’s voice was cool and even. It only made you angrier.
“Are you serious right now?”
His hazel eyes studied you. A flicker of something passed through them, quick as a shadow in candlelight, but then it was gone.
Fine.
You squared your shoulders. “I’ll spell it out. Why are you glaring at Adrin like that?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes, you do.”
“I wasn’t glaring.”
You forced a breath out of your chest—through your nose, just to keep yourself from losing it. A sharp, humorless laugh left you. “If that wasn’t a glare, I’d hate to see what you classify as one.”
His expression didn’t change, but his wings tucked in a little tighter, hands flexing at his sides. You noted that his shadows had stilled, barely a ripple in the air now. They’d decided to be a quiet, unassuming audience, it seemed.
“I have known you long enough to recognize a glare, Azriel. Stop it.”
“I’m not doing anything.”
You huffed, your fingers twitching at your sides. “I don’t know what the hell your problem is, but you need to fix it. Now.”
Azriel’s jaw ticked, and for the first time, his expression hardened. He remained silent.
“If this is about me bringing someone and you being here alone, then you need to get over it,” you said.
“That’s not it.”
“Then what is it?”
Silence once more.
His shadows stirred again, coiling around his boots, floating across the ground beneath you two. You could see the muscle in his jaw tightening, but he didn’t speak.
You sighed, pressing your fingers to your temples before meeting his gaze again. “Okay, well, whatever it is, I need you to find the reason, and I need you to swallow it. And if you can’t swallow it, I need you to shove it so far up your ass that you’re too focused on the discomfort to glare at him like that again.”
His lips parted slightly, like he wanted to respond, but nothing came out. His eyes flickered, scanning your face. Then they glazed over, as if he’d been pulled deeper into his own mind.
It didn’t stop you from continuing.
“Adrin is a guest here,” you went on, voice firm. “I invited him. He is kind, he is nice, and he hasn't done anything to you. In fact, he has helped you. So do not treat him like shit.” You stepped closer, tilting your head. “You haven’t even bothered to talk to him. The least you can do is not look at him like you’re imagining his head on a spike.”
Azriel’s gaze met yours, his voice low as he finally spoke, “I just think it’s rude that your date isn’t paying attention to you. He’s had his eyes on Cassian more than you tonight.”
You blinked, disbelief tightening your chest. “What?”
“You heard me.”
You scoffed. “Adrin has been perfectly attentive and respectful. What, did you expect him to have his hands all over me? What the hell is wrong with you?”
Azriel didn’t respond, but his shadows gained speed as they curled closer to his boots—like they were restless now, waiting for an order.
“This event is supposed to be about harmony,” you continued, “You’re embarrassing this court. You’re embarrassing me.”
That seemed to land. His lips pressed into a thin line, and something flickered in his expression—something raw, something almost like guilt.
“Do not give me a reason to be mad at you,” you added, voice low. “Because I will take it. You have no idea.”
A long beat of silence. Then—
“…Alright,” Az muttered. “Fine. I’m sorry. That was not my intention.”
The apology came so easily. You narrowed your eyes, studying him. He was still too quiet. But for now, you’d take it.
“Good. So, we go out there, and if you interact with him at all, you need to be pleasant. Maybe even smile.” You tilted your head. “And if you can’t do that, at least fix your face.”
Azriel blinked, brow twitching. “My face?”
“Yes. The one you’re currently wearing. You look like I just asked you to kill yourself.”
“I’m not wearing a face,” he said dryly.
“Yes, you are.”
“This is just my face. I don’t have many faces.”
“Well, find a new one.”
The sharpness faded from his eyes and the frustration in your chest loosened slightly, giving way to something else—exhaustion, maybe.
“Okay, okay,” he said after a moment. “Fine.”
You nodded once, steadying yourself before turning for the door.
Right before you stepped out, you glanced over your shoulder. “Fix the face.”
Azriel exhaled through his nose, lifting his hands in mock surrender. “Consider it fixed.”
Then, he gave you a large grin—so obviously forced it made you cringe.
You rolled your eyes. “That is not what I meant.”
Still, you smiled despite yourself. A little amused, a little tired. And for a brief moment, before you turned away, you swore you saw a real smile flicker across his face, too. Soft and fleeting. It made your heart skip.
Before it could beat faster, you left.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
Azriel found you again an hour later.
You sensed him before you saw him—the shift in the air, the way the room seemed to settle in his presence. Then his shadows, curling toward you before slithering back, as if unsure if they were welcome.
You weren’t even sure why you’d walked away from Adrin and your friends. Maybe you needed space. Maybe you needed to breathe. It wasn’t until you stepped back—from the conversation, from the laughter, from the gentle touches shared between lovers—that you realized.
This was the first time you’d noticed. The first time it had stung.
How alone you were.
You didn’t look as Azriel approached. Instead, you fixated on the guests around you, on their easy smiles and warm hands clasped together. It would hurt to look at him. You already knew.
And yet, you felt him watching. Felt the heat of him beside you.
It was sad. All of it.
You’d assumed falling for your best friend would be a gift. Imagined it would be easy, uncomplicated—a love that came with a quiet understanding, someone who knew you better than you knew yourself. It sounded simple enough. You would know, and they would know, and that would be it. The kind of love that people dreamed of, that stories were made of.
It was funny, in a painfully poetic way, how reality differed from daydreams. You almost wanted to revisit every love story you’d ever read, to pick them apart, to see where they’d lied—where they’d dared to be hopeful.
A shadow curled at your wrist before slinking away.
"Do you have another complaint for me?" you murmured, just loud enough for Azriel to hear over the music. “Maybe feeling bothered that Adrin isn’t slobbering at my feet like a hound desperate for food?”
Az huffed a quiet breath. "No."
Your lips pressed together. You wanted to hold on to the annoyance, to the way he’d been needling at you all evening, but the weight of the room was different now.
Azriel must have known it too, because after a pause, he shifted slightly, extending a hand toward you. "Dance with me?"
Your gaze flicked to his outstretched hand, then back to his face. His expression was carefully neutral, but his wings… His wings were tucked in tight, the only real tell of his discomfort. You knew he didn’t love events like these. The crowds, the attention. He wore it well—carried himself like he belonged, like nothing touched him—but you knew better.
And that’s why, despite everything, you sighed, placing your hand in his.
His shadows stirred again, wrapping briefly around your wrist before dissipating. Pleased with your choice.
"Your perfect date seems to be enjoying himself."
You felt it again—that ache in your chest.
Your eyes flicked over Azriel's shoulder, landing on Adrin. He was still standing alongside Gwyn, but the two had been joined by Lucien and Elain as well. Adrin was laughing at something Lucien was saying. He looked… comfortable. Bright. Perfect.
Perfect in the way that should have made your heart skip, that should have made you feel something when he smiled. But you felt… nothing. Just awareness, a passing observation. And then your gaze drifted back to Azriel, to the sharp lines of his face, the way the faelight caught in his eyes. Made something in them simmer.
"Not perfect," you murmured.
You didn’t like perfection. It was too neat, too curated—like something fragile on display, meant to be admired but never touched. It didn’t crack, didn’t bleed. And you didn’t want that. You never had.
"I wouldn’t want perfect anyway," you added, glancing briefly at Adrin and then back to Azriel. "Perfect isn't real."
Azriel said nothing at first, but his grip on your hand tightened briefly. You wondered if he understood.
His other hand rested against your waist as he led you through the steps. You felt his touch like a burning mark, your heart beating faster at the way he stroked his thumb along the fabric of your dress. The tension from earlier still lingered between you—thin, stretched taut. You wondered if he still wanted to bring up Adrin once more. But instead, Azriel said, "I didn’t get to tell you earlier, with you scolding me and all."
You rolled your eyes, casting your gaze aside.
"Which was very warranted," Azriel added, the corner of his mouth twitching as he leaned in further. "But, you are… breathtaking."
Your eyes snapped back to his. The way he said it—quiet, certain, like it was fact, undeniable and absolute—made something shift beneath your ribs. You forced yourself to keep breathing, to move past the moment before it could settle too deeply.
"Thank you. Mor helped me pick the dress."
Azriel guided you into a spin, and when you turned back to face him, he said, "I wasn’t referring to your dress."
His hand found yours, fingers lacing through before you could think too much about it. It was an easy thing, effortless—like it was second nature to him. "I was referring to the person wearing it."
Your pulse stuttered. How could anyone else compare to this? How were you ever going to find someone who could make you feel like this?
The thought unsettled you. Maybe because it was the first time you let yourself acknowledge it. Maybe because you were starting to think he felt it too.
Because you knew Azriel. Knew him well enough to sense the shift—not just in yourself, but in him. There was something new in the way he watched you, something careful, deliberate. At first, you thought it was guilt, that he was still making up for the way he hurt you. But it was more than that. The way he looked at you now—really looked at you—it made you wonder if this realization had struck him too.
But you had seen him with Mor. With Elain. With Gwyn. You had seen the way he watched them, the way he softened, the way he held himself differently in their presence. And never—not once—had he looked at you like that.
So maybe this feeling was yours alone. Something to swallow like a bitter tonic, a remedy that only worsened the sickness.
The dance was slowing. You saw it in the way couples began to separate, the way the musicians readied to shift into something new. You and Azriel stilled, as if time itself was reluctant to move on.
His eyes traced over your face. "It’s different," he murmured. "Seeing your entire face like this."
Your brows furrowed slightly, and his lips twitched, like he knew you didn’t fully understand. Then his free hand lifted—hesitating for just a second—before his fingers brushed lightly against the side of your face, just above your ear, where your hair had been pinned back.
"You usually let it fall forward," he said. "I’m used to you hiding behind it."
You didn’t know what to say to that. You didn’t know what to do with the way he was looking at you. You wondered if he knew how much this pained you.
And when the music came to an end, you all but scrambled away from him, seeking out Adrin again.
Adrin told you about everything he’d learned from Lucien—the invitation the Vanserra had extended to explore the Day Court. Autumn too, if Adrin wished. You tried to listen. Tried to pay attention. To ignore the burning gaze of Azriel, to pretend you hadn’t seen the way his expression faltered when you pulled away.
You stayed by Adrin’s side all night, introducing him to more court members. Always finding your way back to Cassian, Nesta, and Gwyn. But no matter how much space you put between you and Azriel, you felt him.
Always, you felt him.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
The banquet had begun to settle into its last echoes of laughter and music, guests beginning their slow trickle home.You stood with Adrin near the entrance, the golden glow of the banquet spilling onto the front gardens.
He turned to you, his expression softened in the dim light. “Thank you,” he murmured, and before you could ask for what, he leaned in, pressing a warm, fleeting kiss to your cheek. When he pulled back, there was something earnest in his gaze. “For sharing the night with a friend. For showing me all these connections I might not have made on my own.”
You smiled, something fond curling in your chest. “You would’ve made them eventually.”
“Maybe. But I like the way it happened tonight.”
“Thank you for keeping me company,” you told him. “You don’t know how much I needed it.”
With one last smile, he turned and disappeared down the path, his silhouette vanishing into the dark.
You exhaled, rolling your shoulders before making your way back inside. The warmth hit you immediately—the lingering energy of the night still alive in the laughter, the flickering faelights, the press of familiar faces.
Your family.
Rhys stood at the center of it, Nyx in his arms, tossing him into the air. The babe let out a shriek of joy, his chubby hands clapping together as he was caught again with ease.
“Bachelor of the evening,” Cassian declared, raising a half-empty glass. “In all his two feet and six inch glory.”
Nyx, unaware of the meaning but basking in the attention, beamed a chubby smile, curling into his father’s chest.
You watched them, something warm and tight settling in your chest, even as Cassian snorted at his own words, making a joke about another six inch glory. But still—still—there was something else stirring within you. That restlessness in your bones. That all-too-familiar, infamous ache.
Before you could think twice, you turned, feet carrying you swiftly down the halls, toward the back of the manor.
The stone steps were cool beneath you as you descended into the garden. You exhaled, lowering yourself onto the edge of a stair, forearms braced against your knees. The air was cooler here, quieter, the sky stretched wide above you—clear and endless.
Behind you, the door creaked open. Light footsteps. Familiar.
Mor lowered herself onto the step beside you, the silk of her dress brushing against your arm. She didn’t say anything at first, just settled into the silence with you.
Then, gently, “You okay?”
Your thoughts were loud, pressing in from every angle, twisting over themselves until they became nothing but static. You let out a laugh, dry and brittle. “My head physically hurts from how much I’ve been thinking.”
Mor nodded, tilting her head back to look at the sky. “And have you come to any conclusions?”
“I might not be as patient as I once thought.”
Mor laughed, the sound carried off by the night breeze. “What makes you say that?”
You turned to her, lips pressing together before you admitted, “I was tempted to throttle Az in front of everyone.”
Mor’s lips quirked up, the faint remnants of her red lipstick catching the glow of the faelights through the windows. You were sure there were countless champagne flutes and wine glasses that now bore the mark of her lips, a kiss print of her perfect lipstick. There was something sweet about how the color was faded now. Years ago, it would still be perfect—because years ago, Mor would’ve excused herself to touch up her makeup almost every half hour. She didn’t do that anymore. These days, Emerie held her attention, made her forget anything other than the night unfolding around her.
“Not interested in adding to your growing reputation as a public street fighter?” Mor teased. “I would’ve helped you drag him to the street.”
You shot her a scowl. “Not funny,” you muttered. Then, hesitantly, “Do people really think that?”
She snorted, shaking her head. “No. I’m messing with you. But imagine how fun that would be.”
“We have different definitions of fun.”
“And that’s what makes us such great friends.”
Mor leaned in, looping her arm through yours, pressing it to her chest as she rested her head on your shoulder. The cool metal of her jewelry sent a shiver through you. You resisted the urge to frown at the large, chunky bracelet on her wrist—the one she’d taken from Selene. You’d already rolled your eyes at it earlier in the night, warning her it was probably cursed. She had only shrugged and said that nothing related to her could be bad luck—and that it matched her gown perfectly. She wasn’t wrong. It did.
You hummed, amused, and rested your head against hers.
“So what did Az do?” she asked after a moment.
“I don’t know what got into him. He was so rude tonight.”
“To you?”
“To Adrin,” you clarified, huffing. “Gods, it infuriated me. I had to scold him like some child before I lost my own mind.”
Mor lifted her head slightly. “Is that where you pulled him off to?”
You turned just enough to meet her gaze. “You saw that?”
She sat up, stretching her legs out in front of her. “I’m very observant.”
“Nosy is the word I’d use.”
Mor nudged you with a laugh. Then she shifted, pulling her arm away as she readjusted her position. “Do you know why it bothered you so much?”
Your brows knit together. “It was rude,” you deadpanned. “Adrin was a guest. Az had no right acting like some pompous guard dog.”
Mor nodded solemnly. “Yeah. Maybe we need to get him retrained.”
Despite yourself, you smiled, a quick image flashing in your mind of Azriel’s unimpressed face whenever one of you made a dog joke at his expense. Even the ones about his loyalty. Not that you could blame him—you probably wouldn’t appreciate the comparison either.
“It was also a bit offensive that Az paid more attention to me tonight than he has for months,” you admitted. “Not even to me. To Adrin. I don’t know why that bothered me so much, aside from it being bad manners.”
Mor gave you a knowing look. “Can I ask you something? But you have to promise you won’t get mad.”
You narrowed your eyes. “When you say stuff like that, I don’t want to promise anything.”
She pouted slightly. “Please.”
You sighed, turning to face her more fully. The new position left you exposed to the chill, no longer shielded by your hunched posture. Your knees brushed, the fabric of your dress rustling against hers. “Fine. Tell me.”
Mor hesitated, studying you carefully. Then, softly, “Do you think it bothers you because you want him to pay attention to you this much… normally? And not just when you bring a date?”
You dropped your gaze to your lap, to your fidgeting fingers. “I mean, maybe. Yeah.”
Mor craned her neck, trying to meet your averted gaze. “Maybe because you have feelings for him?”
Your head snapped up so fast you were surprised you didn’t break something. Though, based on the sharp pull in your neck, you might have strained a muscle.
“What?”
The sympathetic look Mor offered you was enough to draw the ache in your chest back to full strength.
“Am I wrong?”
You could’ve lied. Could’ve shaken your head, laughed it off, brushed past it like it was nothing. And maybe Mor would’ve let you. Not because she let things go easily, but because she knew you—knew when to push and when to step back.
But you didn’t lie.
Because the weight of it, the truth of it, had been pressing down on you for too long.
“Maybe,” you admitted quietly.
The words settled over you like a breaking wave. The minute they were out in the open, everything rushed back—every ache, every stolen glance, every frustration and lingering sadness. The realization of it felt like a stone lodged behind your ribs, pressing into you from the inside. Your throat burned. Your eyes stung.
You swallowed hard, but it did nothing to push down the lump forming there.
Then your lips quivered. And that was enough to make you break.
You turned away, hands pressing against your face as a shaky breath left you.
“Gods, Mor,” you mumbled, voice unsteady. “I feel so dramatic. I-I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“Oh, honey.” She placed a hand on your shoulder, gently squeezing to call your attention back to her. When you met her eyes, something flickered across her features. “Are you crying?”
“Not yet,” you sniffed.
She blinked. Once, twice. Then said, “Give me a minute, okay? I’ll be right back. And then I want you to tell me everything.”
You didn’t question it, just nodded as she disappeared inside.
When she returned, her presence was quieter. She sank beside you, draping a shawl over your shoulders—one that matched the color of her dress. Her shawl. And on her own form, she wore one in deep purple. Emerie’s, you assumed. You hadn’t seen her wear it before.
You noticed, too, that Mor’s jewelry was gone. The rings, the collection of bracelets. She tended to do that when she was overstimulated by the sounds—when the weight of metal felt unbearable against her skin.
You tipped your head back, staring at the sky. No more tears fell, but they lingered, heavy behind your eyes. The lump in your throat was smaller now. Bearable. You swallowed against it, against everything that wanted to rise with it.
“I was content,” you said finally. You inhaled deeply, swore you heard your ribs rattle with the effort, and turned to look at Mor. “With being single. With waiting for whatever was supposed to happen. I never thought I’d be the last one standing, but I didn’t mind. It never felt like something was missing.”
Mor’s brown eyes scanned your face, a small crease forming between her brows. “And now?”
Now.
Now, you wondered if you had never felt that ache because you had been loved so deeply by people like Azriel. Loved in a way that had made you think—foolishly, blindly—that it was enough. That it would always be enough.
But the words tangled in your throat before you could voice them. Your mind was funny like that sometimes—so many thoughts, so fast, so loud, and yet, when you reached for them, they recoiled. Shy. Timid. As if they, too, were embarrassed by their own existence.
“Now, I feel like something was stolen from me.”
Mor blinked. “What do you mean?”
“I always thought…” You paused, digging through your mind, clawing for the right words. “I thought love would feel different. That I would know when it happened. That it would be this big, overwhelming thing—fireworks, explosions, something cinematic.” You shook your head. “But with Azriel, it never felt like that. It felt… calm.” Your voice softened. “Like home.”
Mor’s expression gentled, but she didn’t speak. Not yet. And you were grateful for it, because now the words were spilling out, untamed and raw.
“And I hate that I didn’t get to figure that out on my own,” you admitted, your voice cracking with the confession. “That Selene and this ridiculous situation forced me to see it before I was ready. I didn’t get to sit across from him at breakfast, watching him drink his tea, and realize—slowly, comfortably—that this could be the rest of my life.” You swallowed hard. “Instead, it feels like everyone else saw it before I did. Like my feelings aren’t even my own. I feel… embarrassed.”
Mor’s brows knit together, and she reached for your hand. “You have nothing to be embarrassed about. You know that, right?”
You let out a humorless laugh. “Doesn’t matter. It feels that way.”
And maybe that was the worst part. That something so personal, so yours, had been made into something for everyone else to witness. That, maybe, they had already formed their own conclusions.
“I’ve never really dated.” The words felt foreign, like they didn’t belong in this conversation. But they did. “Not really. I never searched for it, never felt like I needed to.”
Mor traced her thumb in slow circles against your knuckles.
“I thought it was because I was happy. Because I was fulfilled, platonically. That I never ached for a mate or a partner because I was already surrounded by love. But now—” Your throat tightened. “Now, I wonder if it was just because of him. If I loved Azriel this whole time and never noticed. If my heart already knew there was nowhere else to look.”
Mor’s grip on your hand tightened.
“But he looked,” you continued, barely above a whisper. “Azriel has looked.” You swallowed hard. “Gods, Mor—he even looked to you.”
Mor’s lips parted slightly, guilt flickering in her expression before she caught herself. “That was—”
“I know,” you cut in. “It’s not about that. It’s not about you. It’s just—” You exhaled sharply, rubbing your temple. “I’ve never been this aware of myself before. My shortcomings. My inexperience. I’ve never thought about any of it because I never had to.”
But now, every interaction with Azriel felt different. Now, every glance, every touch, every conversation—changed.
And gods, maybe, just maybe, people would think Selene was right.
Maybe they would think you had pushed Azriel away from her because you were jealous, because you had always wanted him for yourself.
You looked at Mor. “I didn’t talk to Az about Selene because I was jealous. I swear, Mor. It wasn’t like that.”
Mor shushed you. “I know.”
“But what if he doesn’t? What if everyone—”
“No one else matters.”
Mor’s gaze softened. She brought her free hand to your bicep, her palm warm as she ran it gently down your skin. The cool night air clung to you, but beneath it, you still burned. From your thoughts, from your grief, from the overwhelming realization that had come too soon.
“Y/n,” she said after a moment. “Do you truly think Az doesn’t feel the same way?”
“Yes,” you said with certainty. But after the words left your mouth, they felt hollow. You bit the inside of your cheek. “And even if he did, I’m not sure that would help me.”
“What do you mean?”
You stiffened. Loving Azriel was not the same as loving anyone else. Loving him was easy, yes—but the way Azriel romantically loved was sickening. It was obsessive, gluttonous.
You were afraid of what it might mean to be on the receiving end of it.
Because Azriel had always glorified the ones he loved, turned them into something untouchable, something divine. It was the kind of love that replaced religion. And you—you—were not divine. You were not flawless. And that alone made you doubt yourself.
Azriel had seen your faults. The way you held grudges, the way you sometimes bit down your emotions until they cut into you, the way you weren’t always kind. In a friend, those things were forgivable. But in a lover?
Flaws in a lover could be a sin for Az.
And you didn't think you could survive it—the moment he realized you weren’t something worth worshiping.
Better, then, to never let him try.
You decided not to answer Mor’s question— not properly at least. Instead, you shrugged, turning your gaze back to the night before you, to the calm gardens and the skies that illuminated them.
“I just do.”
Mor hummed. She understood that the conversation was over. You were tired. And there was nothing she could say that you hadn’t already dissected a thousand times in your mind. So she pulled you closer, and you let her, resting your head against the crook of her shoulder.
The door creaked open behind you. You didn’t acknowledge it, but you felt Mor shift, felt her hair brush your cheek as she turned to greet the new addition to your self-pity circle.
And then you felt another familiar presence. The scent of night-chilled wind, sea, and citrus, the familiar shift in power—a presence heavier than Azriel’s, but just as consuming. Even more at times.
Rhys settled beside you with a groan, joints creaking as he got comfortable.
It made you smile, just a little. Old man.
“I was wondering where you two went off to,” he said. “What are you doing out here?”
You let out a small sound—something noncommittal, something that didn’t quite fill the silence. “Oh, you know. Contemplating every single sense of existential dread.” You gestured vaguely. “Talking about the weather.”
Rhys lifted a brow. You paused, sparing him a quick glance. “It’s nice weather.”
He made a sound—half a hum, half a laugh—and rubbed his knee. “I don’t know. I can feel rain coming.”
You didn’t say anything, just glanced up at the sky—still clear, the stars bright. Some rain sounded nice. Peaceful. Something to wash away the past few days.
Rhys looked over at Mor. “Emerie is looking for you.”
Mor exhaled, glancing between the two of you before pulling away. Her hands, fingers now cold from the night, squeezed your face gently. “I love you,” she said softly. “Come find me if you need anything, okay?”
You nodded. “Yeah. Okay.”
She hesitated for just a second before standing up and disappearing into the house. You watched her go, the warmth of her touch still lingering on your skin as you turned back around, finding Rhys already watching you. He had that look—one of quiet concern, of something like careful patience. The image of a concerned father. An older brother.
“You don’t have to babysit me, you know,” you muttered.
Rhys snorted. “Trust me, I’ve had enough babysitting for the night.”
“Yeah, but don’t you want to be inside with everyone else?”
“Are you trying to kick me back into my own home?” he asked, amused.
You shook your head. “No, I just don’t want you to feel like you need to be out here with me.”
“I don’t feel like I need to be anything,” he said simply. “I haven’t spent much time with you lately. I want to be out here.” His voice softened. “After all, this is a banquet thanking people who’ve helped this court. Who has helped more than you, the one I trust to help repair our image?”
You let out a quiet laugh. “Well, I did some damage recently, too.”
“Until you get banned from an entire court, I think you’re alright.”
The conversation settled into a lull, quiet stretching between you.
Then you said, “I’m assuming Mor told you some things.”
“Not really. But I can assume.”
You swallowed, looking away. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Okay,” he said easily. “We don’t have to.”
“But…” You glanced at him, suddenly tired of holding it all in. You had always been honest with your family—always told them the truth, even when it was difficult. And after opening up to Mor, after feeling the weight of it ease just slightly, you realized how much you had missed this. How much lighter a burden felt when it was shared, when you weren’t the only one carrying it.
Rhys seemed to understand before you even said another word. His expression shifted, something like realization settling in his gaze. And then, carefully, you felt the light press of him in your mind. A knock.
You let your walls down.
You felt his presence as he sifted through the memories—watched his face change as he saw it all.
After a long moment, he straightened slightly, exhaling as he looked at you. He squinted, tilting his head. “Oh,” he said. “I see.”
“Yeah.”
You turned away again, resting your head in your hands. Your chest felt a lot lighter now. Your thoughts a little less heavy. Rhys didn’t say anything. He just stood, brushing off his pants before stepping down the stairs.
You frowned, watching as he descended a few steps, then extended a hand toward you.
“What are you doing?” you asked.
“We’re going on a walk.”
“A walk?”
“Yes,” he said. “I think you need to clear your mind.”
You hesitated, eyeing his outstretched hand. He only smiled. “Someone very special in my life used to take me on walks when I was overwhelmed.”
Your lips parted slightly, a flicker of recognition sparking in your chest. You thought back to those early years—when Rhys was newly High Lord, when he was drowning in responsibility and grief he wouldn’t even acknowledge. You had forced him to go on walks back then, dragging him away from his desk, ignoring his protests. He had hated it at first. And then, eventually, it had just become something you did.
A quiet tradition.
You smiled—small, almost sad—as you pushed yourself up. “Are you sure you want to leave everyone?”
“I think they can handle us leaving for a few hours.”
You scoffed. “Don’t speak too soon.”
Rhys huffed a laugh, shaking his head as you stepped down to join him. And then, without another word, you walked.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
There was a certain shared understanding between you and Rhysand— two people who had seen each other at their best and worst. For an hour, as the familiar rhythm of your footsteps matched each other’s perfectly, it felt as if the world had paused just enough for you to feel like you belonged again.
When you finally reached the townhome, Rhys stopped, his hand on your arm like he was trying to keep you from walking away too soon.
“You’re not foolish for not realizing it sooner,” he said. “It’s a gift, really. To love so fully, so completely, that you don’t even notice where friendship ends and something more begins. Most people can’t do that, you know. We’re… very lucky to have you.”
You could only manage a smile in response. Rhys pulled you into a hug, his arms tight around you as he pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head. “Get some rest,” he murmured, pulling away. Then he grinned, a familiar one that only he could pull off. “If you keep overthinking, I’ll have to start charging for my emotional support. I don’t come cheap, you know.”
“Are businesses no longer discounting damaged goods?”
Rhys let out a dramatic gasp, clutching his chest. “Ouch,” he said, eyes wide with mock offense. “I take back everything about you being loving.”
“Night, Rhys,” you said, your voice warmer now. Genuine. “Love you.”
His smile softened, no longer the teasing grin. “I know.” And you could hear the affection there.
Then he turned and began walking down the path, whistling a nursing song that you were sure Nyx had been fixated on. Rhys reached the corner, paused for a moment as if to make sure no one was watching, then disappeared, winnowing into the night.
Dramatic even without an audience. You shook your head, a small smile still tugging at your lips, before entering the townhouse and making your way up the stairs.
You stopped when you saw him.
Azriel. Sitting against your door like he was waiting for something—someone. You. His eyes met yours, locking in place as if he’d been holding his breath this whole time. And in a blink, he was on his feet, moving like something had snapped, urgent, too fast for comfort.
“Y/n,” he said, his voice low. “I’ve been waiting for you.”
You paused, pushing the door to your bedroom open slowly, not fully meeting his gaze. “Why?”
“I was hoping we could talk.”
You sighed, shoulders sagging as exhaustion settled over you. You didn’t want to have this conversation—not right now. It wasn’t that you didn’t care about what Azriel had to say, but everything just felt too much in this moment. You needed space, time to breathe and clear your head before diving into whatever this was between you two.
Tomorrow. You could deal with it tomorrow, with a fresh perspective, when you weren’t so drained. Tonight, you just needed to sleep, to wake up with your head in a better place, ready to handle it all. You wanted Rhys's words to be the last thing in your mind. Something comforting. Soothing.
“Maybe tomorrow,” you muttered, stepping inside. “I’m tired.”
“I’ll make this quick.”
You moved toward your bed, placing Mor’s shawl across your sheets. “Az, seriously. Tomorrow.”
He didn’t move, and when you glanced up, he looked at you then—really looked at you—and your breath caught in your throat as he asked, "Do you have feelings for me?"
You froze. A strange, cold knot twisted in your stomach. “Oh, not this again,” you groaned. You looked away, instinctively crossing your arms across your chest.
“Yes, this again,” he pressed, stepping closer. “I want an answer. Please.”
“Come on, Az.” You forced control over the tremor rising in your chest. “What did I do this time? Stare at you too long? Breathe too loud? Did you mistake me scolding you for some strange forepla—”
“I heard you,” he interrupted, and the words hit like a slap.
It felt like the air stopped moving. You couldn’t breathe.
“What?”
“Tonight,” he said, voice quieter now, “I heard you and Mor. I found this in my pocket.” He pulled out a bracelet—Selene’s, the matching piece to the one Mor had worn earlier.
Your heart slammed into your ribs. You opened your mouth to explain, but nothing came out. You needed something—anything. "You—you misunderstood."
"Did I?" His shadows stirred restlessly around him. “I-I didn’t hear much. It went quiet too fast, but from what I did hear… Did I really misunderstand?”
Your face burned, the heat spreading so quickly it felt like your skin might catch fire under his stare. You turned away, pulling your arms tighter across your chest. “Azriel, I don’t—”
“Just tell me the truth,” he urged, his voice cracking. “Please.”
You couldn’t respond. The words wouldn’t come.
A long silence stretched between you.
“Okay,” Az said, and his voice was so soft, so unlike his usual tone, it almost felt foreign. “Then I need to say something.”
"Az…" You turned to him, meeting his eyes as you said, "Just, please, don’t.”
Your response didn’t seem to register. Azriel closed his eyes, taking in a slow, deep breath, like he was steadying himself before a plunge.
“That night,” he started, “when I cleaned up your cheek, you asked why I listened to Selene. Why I said you had feelings for me. I told you I didn’t know.” He paused, dragging his hand over his face. “I lied. I know why. It bothered me when she said it. More than I wanted to admit. I told myself it was just because it made me uncomfortable—but that wasn’t it. I think the real reason I couldn’t stop thinking about it was because a part of me wanted it to be true.”
Maybe it was the exhaustion, or the way Azriel looked so exposed in front of you, but his words didn’t land right away. You blinked, trying to process, but before you could speak, he continued—his voice somehow even softer now.
“I thought if I said it out loud, you’d laugh it off. Call me crazy. Maybe you’d correct me. Then I could force myself to never think about it again. But you didn’t. And gods, the look on your face when I said it... it was like I’d hit you.”
Another silence settled between you. For the first time, you were grateful for it, because one look at Az told you he wasn’t finished, that there was more he needed to say.
“I think I’ve always loved you,” Az said, and the words cracked something open inside you. “I didn’t know it—not at first. I thought it was normal. Of course, I wanted to be around you all the time. Of course, you’d be the first person I thought of in the morning and the last person at night.” His voice wavered, and he shook his head, a bitter smile tugging at his lips as his wings fell lax. “But it’s not. It’s not normal.”
His gaze finally met yours, steady, like he was holding you there with it. You’d never seen him look at anyone like this—not Mor, not Elain, not Gwyn.
“I can't lie to you, Y/n. I can’t pretend I don’t love you. You’re everywhere. You’re everything.”
You couldn’t breathe. The world around you narrowed, collapsing inward until there was nothing left but him. Azriel loved you. The relief that hit you almost made your knees give out.
His chest rose and fell quickly, like he was bracing for impact. The earlier desperation was gone, replaced by something more timid. "Please," he whispered. "Say something."
The pressure in your chest—the ache that had burrowed beneath your ribs for weeks—dissipated in an instant. Every concern, every gnawing worry. All that remained was the quiet comfort that Azriel had always given you. That ease, that feeling of home you’d only ever found in him.
You exhaled, and before you could stop yourself, a laugh slipped past your lips—breathless, almost disbelieving. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard you talk that much. Like, ever.”
Azriel blinked. For a moment, you thought you’d broken something—but then, his lips twitched, a hesitant smile pulling at the corner of his mouth.
“Well, there was a lot of ground to cover.” He exhaled through his nose. “But if you don’t feel the same—if this isn’t what you want, I’ll step back. I won’t push. I promise.”
You wanted to cry, to laugh, to praise the Mother that he felt the same. Instead, you closed the space between you. Slowly, you reached up, fingers threading through the mess of his hair, smoothing away the strands that had fallen across his forehead. You traced the line of his cheekbone with the barest brush of your fingertips, committing it to memory, savoring the way his breath hitched beneath your touch.
You hesitated—just for a heartbeat—before cupping his face in your palm.
And then, you kissed him.
He didn’t react at first. He just stood there, completely still, like he hadn’t even processed what was happening. You started to pull away, suddenly unsure—
But then he made a sound, something like a sigh of relief, and his hands found you.
The next kiss wasn’t hesitant. His fingers pressed into your waist as he pulled you in, tilting his head, deepening it, like he didn’t want to waste another second. And you felt it—every inch of it. The ache, the longing, the unbearable relief of finally knowing. Every agonizing thought, every moment spent convincing yourself this was one-sided, crumbling beneath the warmth of his mouth against yours.
No kiss had ever felt like this. Not in all your years, not in all your life. Like something was finally, truly yours. It was sharp, it was bright, a rush that sent you spiraling in a way you hadn’t known you could.
But even with your heart glowing in your chest, there was no dramatic shift. No world-altering moment. It just felt right. A quiet kind of certainty. The kind that settled into your bones and left you with nothing but butterflies.
You pulled apart slowly, foreheads resting together, lips still brushing as if reluctant to let go. The cool touch of his shadows grazed your skin. You weren’t sure if it was them or the kiss itself that made your skin tingle.
Azriel’s eyes fluttered open a second after yours. The way he looked at you—so close, his hazel eyes bright with green flecks—had your chest tightening. It made you breathless. His smile softened the furrow in his brow, the motion pulling at his cheeks in a way that made your heart stutter all over again.
His thumb ghosted over your cheek. “Are you crying?”
You blinked, still so caught up in the haze of everything, in how your heart was doing this erratic dance that you couldn’t quite follow. You lifted a hand to your face, and—shit, there were tears. You hadn’t even noticed. “Oh. Well, guess I am,” you said, a half-laugh slipping out before you could stop it, but it sounded hollow, a little shaky. “Awkward.”
Azriel made a sound, something close to a laugh of his own, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes, not fully. “What is it? Did I do something wrong?”
“You have no idea how much I’ve been overthinking the past few weeks.”
Azriel’s expression softened as his finger moved, brushing over your lips now. ��If it makes you feel better,” he said, “I’ve been in complete agony too.”
A proper laugh slipped from you. “Well, good,” you said, a little teasing, but it felt good to say it. “It does make me feel better. You deserved it a little bit.”
He smiled, amused, his gaze flicking between your eyes and your lips. “I did, didn’t I?”
A soft hum rumbled in your chest in response, something between a smile and a sigh. His thumb continued its slow, deliberate path across your lips, tracing the edges like he was memorizing them. You didn’t stop him.
You let your hands fall, landing gently against his chest, where you could feel the steady, rhythmic pulse of his heart beneath your palm.
“So, what do we do now?” You asked quietly, the question coming out before you could stop it.
Azriel’s motions slowed. “What would you like to do?”
“Well, we probably have to talk about what this means.”
He nodded. “Probably.”
You couldn’t help it. “And we really need to figure out how we’re going to move forward, how this changes everything…”
“Mhm,” he murmured, his focus now completely on your face, his fingers tracing your features, exploring them in a way he’d never been able to.
“Az,” you murmured. “Are you listening to me?”
He didn’t hesitate as he met your gaze and responded, “I would never make the mistake of not listening to you again.”
The sincerity in his voice made your breath catch, every other thought fading in the wake of it—until your stomach growled. You grimaced.
“Actually,” you said, tapping a finger against his chest. “You know what I would really like to do now?”
“Tell me.”
“I could really go for some food.”
Suddenly, Azriel stepped back, eyes lighting up like an excited child. You frowned at the loss of contact. “Wait here.”
Before you could even process what was happening, he was already gone, running out the door. A few seconds later, he returned, breathless, looking slightly too pleased with himself as he held both hands behind his back. “I have something for you.”
You eyed him. “Is it a bug?”
Realistically, you knew it wasn’t. Or at least, you hoped it wasn’t. But Azriel had never looked this pleased with himself before, never this close to giddy. That, combined with the way his hands were securely tucked behind his back, reminded you that—before anything else—Azriel was your best friend. And your best friend knew exactly how to mess with you at the strangest times.
Azriel’s expression faltered for a second. “What? No. Why would it—never mind.”
Then, hesitantly, he revealed it: crumpled in a piece of an appetizer liner, slightly worse for wear, was the rosemary and honey tartlet you’d eyed earlier. You melted at the sight and reached for it gently, cradling it in your hands like something precious.
Azriel looked almost sheepish. “We can get a proper meal, but I noticed you were looking at it earlier—at the banquet. You never grabbed one. So I thought…”
A laugh slipped out before you could stop it. A real one. Centuries. Centuries of friendship, of knowing him better than anyone, and somehow you’d never seen this. Never noticed how deeply he noticed you. How foolish you had been. How lucky you were now.
Azriel frowned. “What? What’s funny?”
“Nothing,” you said, shaking your head, still laughing softly. “Its just— of course you noticed.”
His lips quirked like he wasn’t sure whether to be amused or suspicious. “Well, yeah.”
“Thank you,” you murmured, reaching out again, pressing your palm against his cheek for a beat before turning your focus back to the tartlet. You turned it over in your hands. “Why is it squished?”
Azriel winced, like the question itself embarrassed him. “Doesn’t matter,” he muttered, brushing it off.
You lifted a brow. “Okay.”
You stared at it for another moment, then turned, setting it carefully on your bed.
He frowned. “But the crumbs on your bedsheet—”
You shook your head, smiling with a teasing eye roll. “Just kiss me, neat freak.”
His protest faded as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pressing your mouth to his. Once, then again, and again, until you were sure even his shadows felt the need to look away.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
You and Azriel hadn’t slept.
Not for any reason that would have had Cassian waggling his eyebrows at you—though you did, naturally, find yourself thinking about it—but because the night had slipped away in conversation over greasy food from a little restaurant south of the townhouse.
The early morning light stretched through the windows, soft and golden, as Azriel stood at the kitchen counter making tea. You watched the familiar sight of him steeping the leaves, the way he moved like this was just any other morning.
But it wasn’t. Twelve hours ago, this had felt impossible. And now it was here.
You curled your fingers around the edge of the table, trying to process the weight of it. It wasn’t heavy, though. That was the strangest part. Not that you now knew how his lips felt against yours, or how his heartbeat sounded when it synced with your own, but how there had been no grand shift, no dramatic revelation. No bolt of lightning splitting your world in two.
Just this—Azriel placing a mug in front of you, his fingers brushing yours, his lips quirking as he sat by you like he always had. Except there were small differences now— his chair was closer, next to you more than it was across. You found yourself focusing on smaller details, his dark lashes as he looked down at his cup, the way his fingers curled around the ceramic. You did your best to suppress any fleeting thoughts at the sight of them. Those ideas could be addressed later.
It all made sense—the infuriating, vague notion that people had told you over the years: when you know, you know. You’d always hated that. How could no one ever explain it? How could no one ever find the words? But looking at Az now, you understood. There were no words. Just this. Just the way your heart settled at the sight of him.
“You’re staring,” Azriel murmured, watching you over the rim of his cup.
You hummed, taking a sip of your tea. “You’re pretty.”
Azriel choked. Caught completely off guard. He set his mug down, coughing once, and when he looked at you again, his eyes were narrowed. “That was disgustingly sincere.”
“I know,” you grinned. “You’ll survive.”
Your mind drifted back to the night before—how the two of you had been desperate to catch up on all the things you had missed over the past few weeks. You’d told him about Adrin’s extensive mirthroot collection and how well you thought he’d be suited for Gwyn. He’d groaned, muttering something about needing to apologize. And then Az had told the story of how Cassian had slapped him for being an idiot. Three times. You’d really laughed at that one.
Somewhere between it all, between the easy conversation and the warmth of having him near, it had hit you again and again—this is it. This is what you could have for the rest of your life, if you were lucky.
Azriel hummed, setting his cup down. He knocked his knee against yours—once, then twice, like he was testing something. And then he reached over, grabbed the side of your chair, and scraped it just an inch closer to his.
You shot him a flat look. “Don’t tell me you’re a clingy boyfriend.”
“Boyfriend?” Azriel raised a brow jokingly. “I don’t remember us labeling anything.”
“Oh, right. My mistake. In that case, I should probably tell Nesta to back out of the Gwyn and Adrin plan—”
“Don’t you dare.”
You smirked over your tea. “Why not? It’s not like I have a boyfriend to be upset about it.”
He stared at you for a beat, smiling as his eyes softened with a warmth that made your stomach flip. Seconds later, you were both laughing. Quiet, warm laughter that filled the kitchen, that curled around you like an embrace.
And then—
A shift, a subtle pull, like the air had thickened and the room was just a little smaller. It wasn’t a shock, nothing sudden or harsh. It was smooth, like a breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding until you exhaled, like the feeling of stepping into the sun after hours in the cold.
This was it. He was it.
Azriel froze, eyes widening as the feeling settled. Then, like he was testing something—searching—he tugged, just a bit, like he wasn’t sure if it was real. You sucked in a breath, hand instinctively rising to your chest. You felt it, in the way it seemed to resonate through every nerve, like a pulse echoing through your ribs.
He cleared his throat, a soft sound, almost nervous, and then his voice came out, rough but teasing, “Clingy mate, actually.”
Your heart stumbled over itself. A laugh caught in your throat, half breathless, half disbelieving. And then you were kissing him, pressing your forehead against his, letting the warmth of him, of this, sink into every part of you.
“Bold of you to assume I accept.”
Azriel laughed deeply before he was kissing you again, grinning against your lips as you laughed into his. And when you pulled back, breathless and giddy, you knew—without a single doubt—that you’d never stop choosing this.
Never stop choosing him.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
authors note:
and.... it is a happy ending after all :D awsf? nation how are we feeling tonight🎤
theyre mates, your honor!!! theyre mates and in love!!! im so sorry this took so long my loves, i rewrote it like 6 times. im still worried it doesnt do them justice but hehe we ball
i do have at least two more works for this little universe! a small lil epilogue planned for these sweethearts AND another surprise piece... which is already at 10k (hint: we get…another perspective of the night. plus a fun lil convo with a certain matedhaired male...). the surprise should be out next week, and the proper epilogue (with a timejump!) sometime after. and im always so so open to doing lil one-shots for this universe
thank you all again for reading <3 i hope i've done this lovestory justice.
permanent tag list 🫶🏻:
@rhysandorian @itsswritten @lilah-asteria @georgiadixon @glam-targaryen
@cheneyq @darkbloodsly @motheroffae @azrielsbbg @evergreenlark
@marina468 @azriels-human @book-obsessed124 @bubybubsters @starswholistenanddreamsanswered
@feyretopia @yesiamthatwierd @azrielrot @justyouraveragekleemain @marigold-morelli
@mrsjna @anarchiii @alittlelostalittlefound @melissat1254 @secretsicanthideanymore
@m4tthewmurd0ck @beardburnsupersoldiers @isnotwhatyourethinking @tothestarsandwhateverend @raginghellfire
@angel-graces-world-of-chaos @acoazlove @paradisebabey @inkedinshadows @mellowmusings
@paankhaleyaaar @curiosandcourioser @thisrandombitch @casiiopea2 @w0nderw0manly
@rottenroyalebooks @jurdanpotter @casiiopea2 @gamarancianne @weesablackbeak
@booksaremyescapeworld @knoxic @wynintheclouds @dacrethehalls @louisa-harrier
#azriel x reader#azriel fanfic#azriel fanfiction#azriel acotar#azriel x you#azriel x y/n#acotar fanfic#acotar#acotar fanfiction#acotarfandom#azriel#azriel shadowsinger#azriel spymaster#a court of thorns and roses#azriel one shot#acotar x reader#acotar oneshot#acotar writing#azriel fic#azriel x reader drabble#azriel drabble#azriel x reader angst#azriel x reader fluff#azriel angst#azriel fluff#awsf?
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Mooooooreee.
pairings: husband!caleb x wife!reader
cw: lactation kink, tits sucking, nipple play, based on this request
If someone were to ask Caleb if ass or tits---he would say neither. Because, personality is more important to him. But, if someone would ask him on a deeper level---he'd pick tits. All the way, no hesitation.
One thing that arouses him the most about you, is how big your tits have become ever since the birth of your baby. He can't help it, it's so plump and tender---makes him want to take a bite out of it. It sits so perfectly behind your clothes and by any chance he'd even get a glimpse of your perked tits spilling whenever you breastfeed your baby. Sometimes, while breastfeeding your baby you'll catch him stealing glances at you and if you ask him if there's something wrong he'd tell you "nothing." While pretending to be busy with whatever.
And during sex, it surprises you that the first thing he targets with his mouth is your tits. When I say this man is impatient---he damn is. Just right after he has you sitting over his lap---his hands roam every part of your body. Mostly targeting your tits, perked nipples bulging against the top you're wearing. His hand reached out and gently squeezed it as he watches the fabric of the top getting soaked with your breast milk leaving a wet patch---the sight sends arousal through his clothed hardened cock.
You can't help but let out a soft moan when he does that, feeling something hard poke your clothed pussy under. You felt your aching pussy throb, getting your lacy panties wet---poor you, It's only been two months after the birth of your baby. And now both of you are starting to go back in track of fucking. Before you could even say something, your husband is already pulling your top up---revealing your plumped tits in display. His eyes screamed hunger as he licked his lips like a hungry man---staring down the strip of milk dripping from your perked nipples.
"Honey- ah-!" You haven't even finished your sentence and his mouth quickly latched onto your nipple. Burying his face against your plumped tits as he sucked and massaged the other one with his hand---rubbing and pinching your sensitive nipple causing it to let out milky liquid as it drips down. As a result, you let out soft moans and whimper, careful not to get loud because your baby is sleeping in the next room. Your hands soothe his black locks while you try to push him away from you, but he just wouldn't budge.
This hits different for Caleb, because this is no ordinary tits sucking he always does whenever you two have sex. Yes, he does suck your tits all the time---but now it's different, it's the fact that this is after your pregnancy. The fact that you're able to produce milk. But it doesn't mean he doesn't love to fundle and latch your tits before your pregnancy. Just milk. Milk.
He lets out a grunt in response as he opens his eyes--maintaing eye contact with you while he sucks onto your tit hungrily, he's shameless. He sucks your tit like there's no tomorrow, hot tongue swirling around your sensitive bud earning a twitch from your body. His eyes are filled with lust, savoring the hot milky liquid against his tongue as he swallowed it. Sweet and milky flavor hitting his tongue and he can't help but whimper, yours just hit different than those store-bought milk you both always buy. He always wants to drink one straight from the source. You.
You mutter him to stop but at the same time your pussy says otherwise---feeling your hips grind against his hardened bulge against his pants. Caleb lets out a soft moan, as he pulls away from your tit--earning a loud 'pop!'. He pursed his lips and hugs your waist with his muscular arms. Then, buried his face between your plumped tits making his cheeks squished against as he lifted his head up. Oh he's one pouty husband, making you sigh as he gives you puppy eyes while having a strip of your milk dripping on the side of his lips.
"I want more...please?"
Before your baby was born, he was your baby first:(
masterlist
#lads#love and deepspace#love and deepspace x reader#lads x reader#love and deepspace caleb#caleb x mc#caleb x you#caleb x reader#caleb#lads caleb#lnds caleb#lnds x reader#lnds
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More Than Casual?
Summary: After breaking up with Bucky, you thought you'd never see him again. That is, until you're required to make an appearance at one of the future congressman's events.
Part 1: Casual
CAABNW!Bucky x Agent!ExWidow!Reader
“You ready for the event?” Joaquin asks you as he throws a punch.
“What event?” You huff, dodging the right hook.
“Everyone on Cap’s team gets an invite to the White House.” He covers his guard.
“Less talking, more punching!” Isaiah yells from the other side of his training room.
You’d heard about the event being held at the White House but you decided to turn off the TV the second those familiar blue eyes were displayed. It was too early to see the man who still made you shiver.
“Not going.” Is all you say, throwing him a rogue kick with more force than necessary.
“You’re missing out on the event of the year for what? Ordering in pizza?” He laughs, but you take the opportunity to kick the center of his chest, making Joaquin fly across the room.
“That’s what I’m talking about!” Isaiah hollers.
You help your partner up. “What if I have plans?”
“Plans?” He wiggles his eyebrows. “Are you finally opening your heart to love?”
You roll your eyes, but your heart sinks a little. You’d successfully gone weeks without thinking of him and now, with just a couple of words, he’s back in your mind. Pulling at your heartstrings so tightly it makes your chest cave in.
It wasn’t Joaquin’s fault, he had no idea that the man who’s being honored at the event is the same person who tore your heart to shreds.
“I just don’t feel like going,” you manage to get out. “I much prefer to fight and protect, rather than prance and drink.”
——
“What’s this I hear about you not going to the gala?” Sam casually says a few days later.
You choke on the water you’re drinking.
“That serious, huh?” Sam jokes.
You shake your head. “Doesn’t sound like something that I’d be interested in.”
Your words are careful and strategic. But trying to think of the perfect excuse while your team leader looks at you so inquisitively is almost impossible.
“I’d be nice,” he shrugs. “To go out and support Buck.”
The nickname sends a chill down your spine.
You called him that same name for years, especially when you wanted to tease him. In front of others you’d always referred to him as Sergeant. But in close encounters, especially when you wanted him to plead for something, you’d call him just that. Buck.
It never failed to make you think back to when he was a kid. You’d beg him to see pictures, you knew he had a couple printed out after the rediscovery of the Howling Commandos files.
“You’re looking at the best version of me there is, doll.” He’d always say. “No need to dwell on the past.”
But you knew it was because part of him was always scared to look back. It made him remember he had a life before all of this happened.
“I’m busy that day.” You mutter, picking up the report on the desk.
Sam crosses his arms. “I haven’t even told you when it is.”
You stop in your tracks.
“Is there something else that’s bothering you?” Sam asks carefully. He knows perfectly how to deal with guarded agents. “You can tell me anything, you know that, right?”
You hum.
“So, I hope to see you there, Agent.” Sam narrows his eyes. He doesn’t need to use the words for you to know it’s an order.
You nod your head without another word, leaving the conference room before your anxiety rises more through your body.
——
“You’re pretty amped up for someone who didn’t even want to come!” Sam yells over the loud music playing inside the limo sent for you.
You don’t look back at him as you tip the vodka bottle, letting the clear liquid coat your throat.
On any other day, vodka wouldn’t be your liquor or choice but today, you need all the courage I can get. And in terms of fucking you up the fastest, vodka is the way to go.
You can barely feel your heel poking your foot by the time you step out.
Your eyes inadvertently scan every square inch of the room, not looking for anything suspicious but looking for the man who you’ve been dreading seeing.
It’s bad enough his posters are up on every lamp post.
You make a beeline towards the free bar cart, Joaquin hot on your heels.
“Sam sent me over to babysit you,” he leans on the edge of the cart. “You look like you’re having fun.”
“Oh, yeah,” you say sarcastically, sipping on the martini the bartender set for you. “I’m having a blast.”
Both your eyes travel down to the napkin the bartender passes you, his ten-digit phone number neatly scribbled on the paper.
You turn it over without looking at him.
“What happened to opening up your heart to love?” Joaquin whispers, looking back at the bartender.
“I don’t have time for love.” You mutter, swirling the olives in your drink.
He twists the cap on a water bottle before passing it to you. “You’ll never have time for love, if you don’t make time for love.”
“Who died and made you the team’s hopeless romantic?” You eye him.
“Steve.” He shrugs.
Joaquin goes on and on about love but you can’t hear him anymore. Because the second you look over to the other side of the room, there he is.
Time stands still, and your legs threaten to give out.
Bucky’s changed so much since the day you said goodbye forever. His eyes have dulled, turning into a muted blue like the sky on a rainy day. His hair looks polished, but you know better than anyone else he hates how it feels. “I love it when you run your hands through it,” he used to murmur against your lips. “Makes me feel free.” But most importantly, his expression lacks that liveliness it used to have. The wrinkles near his eyes would deepen the second his lips would stretch into a smile. And it almost always came with a: “You have no idea how much I missed you, Doll.”
Unsaid words stretch between you two. Your eyes say all the talking needed.
Bucky’s eyes travel from yours, down to your left hand, where you’d always wear a vibranium bracelet that he’d gifted you. It had pieces of his old arm in it. Bucky used to say that after The Winter Soldier, he wanted nothing to do with him. Until he met you. He liked when you wore it because it reminded him that even with his past, he could still deserve someone as loving as you.
You rub the spot where the bracelet used to lay.
“You don’t deserve me anymore,” you whisper.
“D’you say something?” Joaquin looks up at you.
You shake your head, ripping your eyes away from the man who caused you unspeakable hurt. But not before noticing how his expression hardened as he looked at the man standing next to you.
You recognized it immediately. It’s Bucky’s signature: I want to rip your head off look.
And it had everything to do with the way Joaquin was rubbing your shoulder.
“Torres, we’re friends, right?” Your eyes bounce from Bucky’s azure to your partner’s brown.
“Yeah,” he eyes you suspiciously.
“Could you pretend to be my boyfriend?” You get out before you can regret the words.
Was it immature? Yes.
Did you want Bucky to feel at least one ounce of the hurt you felt? Also yes.
“Why?” Joaquin’s eyebrows furrow.
“I hate these events because, as you can see,” you flip over the napkin with the bartender’s number on it. “Men always get the wrong idea. So, can you just act like you’re my boyfriend?”
“Is this some kind of test Sam put you up to?”
You pinch your lips together. “Sure.”
“Man! I’ve been waiting for an undercover mission,” he shimmies happily.
“But you have to pretend with everyone, okay?” You look back at the future congressman who’s making his way towards the two of you. “And make it believable.”
Joaquin smooths down his lapels. “You got it.”
Not even ten seconds later, Bucky stands between you and Joaquin with a scowl on his face.
"Agents." He looks at both of you like he's done so many times. But now, his gaze holds Joaquin's for a second longer.
"Congratulations." You raise your glass to him.
"I haven't won, yet." He doesn't look away from the brunet to your side.
"By the looks of it, you're going to sweep the floor with all the other old bozos around here." Joaquin smiles, playfully shoving the super soldier's shoulder but he doesn't budge. Not one bit.
"Could I take her away from you, it'll only be a second." Bucky asks like you're Joaquin's property.
You roll your eyes. "You don't have to ask him."
"As your boyfriend," Joaquin not-so-subtly raises his eyebrows at you. "I approve of your parting."
"We're not in the regency era you doofus." You whisper as Bucky leads the way.
"I haven't been anyone's boyfriend in a long time! I don't know how to act!" He whispers back, throwing his hands up.
"What are you doing here?" Bucky asks the second you're away from everybody else.
"Trust me, I didn't want to be here." You let out a dry laugh, pulling a cigarette from your bag and lighting it up.
"I mean, what are you doing here with him?" Bucky narrows his eyes toward your partner. "What's this? A debutant ball for your new relationship?"
"Why would you care, anyways?" You take a drag, liking the way the smoke coats your mouth.
"I don't care-I-I just-" Bucky runs a hand down his face.
"Look James," You watch as his PR guy paces around the ballroom, looking for the man who is standing in front of you. "It's best if you go back inside."
"I can't." He looks down at the floor. "I can't just leave you out here smoking alone."
A genuine laugh rips through you.
"That's the promise you're keeping up?" You raise your brows, laughing harder as his expression tightens. "Out of all the promises you made me, that's the one you're going with."
"This isn't-" He tries but you interrupt him.
"Tell me what this is?" You push for him to spill what you know is on the tip of his tongue. "What? Was this summon a friendly one? Or did you want to bring me out here just so you could see if you still had it? That power you had over me."
"N-no." He stutters over his words.
"I'm happy now, James." You let out more smoke. "And it's killing you to know that."
"I just don't know how you did it!" He finally snaps. "You come here, looking amazing like always, with another man next to you. Acting like what we had was-"
"What we had was casual." You repeat the words he said. "Nothing more."
"Was it?" His blue eyes lock into yours, tumultuous like the sea.
"Yes." You lie.
"Then why do I feel like this?" He runs a hand through his hair, messing up his perfectly combed hair.
"I don't care, Barnes." You drop the end of your cigarette on the floor. Bucky lifts his foot to step on it, just like he'd done a million times before, only for you to do it first.
You turn on your heel but Bucky stops you.
"Whatever we had is in the past, and I intend on keeping it that way." You look at him over your shoulder, hating the way his gaze still makes your heart squeeze and his touch makes your skin heat.
"I should leave, Congressman." You say through gritted teeth. "Wouldn't want to give the wrong impression to all the voters around here. "
Authors Note: Hiiiihi! Thank you so much for the love on pt. 1! As always make sure to like and comment. Alsoooo I posted the first chapter of my book, it's on my page. I'd love it if you guys could give it a read. And if you'd like to support me, make sure to give me a follow on my ig and tiktok: @sophiabazar_author, I'll be posting all book related content on there! I'll be posting chapter 2 soon! If you'd like a part 3 to casual make sure to comment!
Tagged: @erinallene @the-bucky-one @unaxv @kodzukenie333 @g1g1l @hanacheryl @ironwinnerwonderland
#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes#bucky imagine#bucky x female reader#bucky#bucky fanfic#bucky x y/n#bucky barns x reader#bucky barns x y/n#bucky barns fanfiction#bucky barns x you#james bucky buchanan barnes#james buchanan barnes#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x you angst#bucky barnes x reader angst#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes os#college au#college au!bucky barnes#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky x reader#winter soldier x reader#winter soldier x you#sebastian stan x you#marvel fanfic
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jan ptáček. hans capon. little birdie. flowers in his wreath: begonia as "caution", blueberry as "trust", holly as "protection", lavender as "I will never forget you". ... *whisper* and also as "lavender marriage".
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#hansry#kcd#kcd2#kcd fanart#kingdom come deliverance#kingdom come deliverance 2#jan ptáček#jindřich ze skalice#hans capon#henry of skalitz#my art#they deserve happiness but i love angst at the same time!!#so i think they will both engage with some women for the sake of LAVENDER marriage#likeee we can say possibly Henry x Theresa and Hans x Jitka#but the marriage is LAVENDER (=a marriage for convenience) and they still secretly love each other. hear me out.#soooo hans names his son henry. yep.#but “i'll never forget you” and they never do.#they are almost unseparable#a knight and a noble#not often present in their families#“haha they are such good friends :) :) :)” someone would always say#but nobody knows that they spend so much time together (instead of raising their kids or being at home and helping with the homestead etc)#because they. love. each. other. so. much.#and it's concealed subtly. their love is a work of art#so hidden and ethereal#i want to believe in that. i love angst but i can't think of a bad ending for them.
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Cats and small kids are curious about what you're doing in much of the same way. Sometimes when you seem to be up to something, they want to see what it is. If you try to keep a cat from sniffing something to find out what it is, they'll keep insisting, louder and louder, "let me sniff, let me sniff, LET ME SNIFF, LET ME SNIFF!!" until you do.
And then they sniff at it for two seconds and go "oh, oooh. Now I get it. Don't care" and wander off. But the demand to know will remain for as long as the thing is kept from them.
This one time when I was in nursing school, I had a training period in a kindergarten. One day I was chatting with one of the workers, telling her about this one time when I was in Kentucky due to my boyfriend at the time living there, and I saw this huge locally native spider-
And then I got interrupted by this one specific kid - a four-year-old boy who had taken a liking to me, sharp as hell and never missed a single thing. Looking at me with a deeply baffled, wide-eyed frown that kids that age do when Shit Does Not Add Up, he asked me: Boyfriend? If you're a boy, why did you have a boyfriend?
Not sure what else to say, I just shrugged and said that it happens sometimes, sometimes men fall in love with men or women fall in love with women. And I could practically observe in real time as his confusion disappeared in a blink, as this previously completely unfathomable piece of information entered his brain, was swiftly processed, and instantly filed into "boring grownup shit that I don't care about". He only had one follow-up question:
"What happened to the spider?"
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Met You At The Right Time, This Is What It Feels Like | Quinn Hughes (Headcanons)
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summary: falling in love with quinn through your shared years at college (umich!quinn x reader)
[word count] 3.3k
warnings: NSFW! university relationship | kissing | mentions of drinking and partying | smut | loosing virginity | mentions of p in v intercourse | mature themes and dialogue | read at your own discretion
a/n: based off this request! this was so fucking fun and cute to write and now I want quinn as my boyfriend ! so hope you all feel the same
🎵 feels like by gracie abrams
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ღ bf! quinn hughes who you first met at the rink. one of your good friends was dating another one of the wolverines and asked you to accompany her to his game.
quinn had spotted you during the warm-ups. your smile wide and amused as you watched all the athletes warm up in their own routines. you were joking with chloe—your friend—while her boyfriend tossed you both pucks over the glass. quinn almost passed out when you glanced his way—sending him a sweet, reserved grin. he forced himself to smile back, and when that made you blush and look away, quinn knew that he had to know you.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who asked his teammate about you as soon as the game finished—a victory for the wolverines, thankfully. he attempted to sound nonchalant and uninterested, but his teammate knew quinn too well. he wrapped quinn up in a firm, annoying side huge and gave him a nugie, all while saying 'does huggy bear have a crush on y/n?'
quinn thought the name suited you perfectly. thankfully quinn doesn’t need to ask again before his teammate is getting your number from chloe.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who texted you the following night. at first you were confused—a random number sending you a message with no identification other than a simple 'hey, is this y/n?' curious and intrigued, you responded immediately; 'this is she. who's this?'
quinn's response was immediate, 'shit, sorry. it's quinn hughes.'
and of course that made you giggle into your palm, feet kicking like you're an oversized excited child. because quinn fucking hughes was texting you. quinn hughes, the cutie who sits two rows back from you in kinesiology class. quinn hughes who was stupid good at hockey and was looking at you during warmups the day before.
you don't even care how he got your number (he told you regardless though, obviously), all you cared about was him wanting to text you in the first place.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who after a week and a million shared text messages later, you run into at a local coffee shop—where you merely miss spilling your entire iced chai down the front of his light coloured hockey hoodie.
he freezes and stutters at the sight of your flushed face, and his nerves only build when he sees that you're not nervous to talk to him. quinn quickly realizes he has some sort of infatuation with you, and before he can sike himself out he asks you on a date.
quinn asks in the middle of your scentence, but you don't even care. he's cute—he's dorky. 'would you wanna get dinner together sometime? like maybe thursday, if you're free?'
you are so free.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who picks you up at your dorm room before your first date. he lives off campus with his friends, and he borrowed his roommates car to come and get you. he brings you flowers—which you put in an empty orange juice bottle that you filled with water—and hugs you at the door. it’s kinda awkward and so perfectly quinn.
he lets his hand hover your lower back as you walk to the car, and of course he opens the door for you. quinn lets you play your music in the car, and he lets you talk his ear off—he can’t help but admire how comfortable you are around him. he thinks you’re like sunshine.
quinn takes you to a local italian restaurant, where you order chicken alfredo and he orders spaghetti bolognese. the conversation flows between you easily, and by the time desert rolls around, you’re sharing a lava cake—your respective spoons swiping at each others while playfully fighting for the same bites.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who after bringing you back to your dorm, grabs your wrist before you can walk in. your roommate isn’t home yet, and you can smell the peonies quinn brought that you left in the jug by the door.
you blink at him curiously, because you’ve already shared your pleasant goodbyes and made plans to see each other again. ‘you okay?’
quinn’s palm is sweaty where it wraps around you. he’s nervous, and he swallows roughly—eyes darting around your blushing face like he can’t get enough. ‘can I kiss you?’
your answer is pushing up to your toes and wrapping you arms around his neck. that’s when quinn leans down, kissing you timidly but also firmly. he’s never felt lips softer than yours, and you’ve never had a kiss turn your stomach inside out the way quinn’s did.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who asks you on a second date, and then a third, and then a fourth. each date is accompanied by a kiss, and another kiss—until all it feels like you’re doing is giggling and kissing like teenagers.
he’s a gentleman, and never makes advances that you aren’t comfortable with. quinn brings you to the beach for sunsets, kissing you under the glow of the setting sun. he takes you to the movies and to a local pottery class—sneaking kisses anytime your eyes meet.
he asks you to be his girlfriend on your fourth date while you’re both still in the car, hands twitching against his pants nervously. you’ve never smiled bigger, and you squeal in excitement, leaning over the centre console and kissing him.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who has never had a serious girlfriend before, only stupid month or so situationships and meaningless hookups. so now that he’s got you, an actual girlfriend, he’s enamoured by all the little ‘girlfriend’ things you do.
quinn goes feral when you wear his clothes. the sight of you waking up in his cozy bed, blinking tiredly while his shirt rides up your body, revealing your underwear…quinn just about dies.
you cook dinner for him, and you always tickle his back when he’s falling asleep. you want to watch all his favourite movies, and you want to learn about hockey—which leads to him teaching you how to skate, where you inevitably fall and bring him down with you.
you’re the perfect girlfriend. and even though quinn stresses he doesn’t need you to fold his laundry or pick up his shampoo when you notice he’s out, he appreciates it more than he could ever express.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who always is getting you flowers. whether it’s a pre-made bouquet from the grocery store, an arrangement he picked out at the florist, or a bunch of wild flowers from the park beside his house, quinn is giving you flowers.
when he’s at the grocery store he always picks up your favourite ben & jerry’s ice cream, as well as your favourite drink. quinn always makes sure you have water before he gets in bed himself, because you’ll be upset if you don’t, and he lets you tuck your feet under his legs because they’re always cold.
quinn is the sweetest boy you’ve ever known and he is constantly making sure you’re content before anything else.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who takes your virginity. you’ve only had one boyfriend and that was back in highschool—the farthest you’d gone with him was kissing and a little groping. when you tell quinn that you’re a virgin, he’s a little nervous—especially because he’s already hovering over you, painfully hard while your bare tits are starring at him. the only reason he’s nervous is because he wants you to be comfortable and sure. he wants it to be perfect for you.
but when you assure him in a breathy whisper, your small nimble fingers reaching out and squeezing his dick, quinn can’t hold himself back any longer. he fucks you soft and sweet, bucking into you at a pace that has your breath hitching. quinn checks on you through the whole thing, scattering kisses along your face and neck while you’re moaning in pleasure.
it’s perfect for you, and that makes it perfect for quinn.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who plays a little extra hard when you’re in the crowd. there’s something so special about having you watching him in the stands during his games, cheering him on and jumping up and down with excitement. quinn swears he can hear you over the crowd, and that always pushes him a little bit more.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who always makes sure to comfort you when you’re stressed—and vice versa.
you often get overwhelmed with your school work. you’re very smart and have a jam packed schedule, and a lot of the time if you want to spend time with quinn, you’re bringing your textbooks and laptop so you can get some work done. quinn hates the way you sigh shakily when you reach a difficult question. you’re tired and done with school, and most of the time it makes you emotional.
when you begin to cry quinn darts to you, wrapping you in a hug while you sob into his shoulder. he rubs your back soothingly, squeezing your arms and sides comfortingly. he whispers words of reassurance in your ear until you’ve calmed down, and when you inevitably get back to work, quinn helps you. even though he has no fucking clue what you’re working on, the effort makes you melt.
quinn is always the most stressed when he’s dealing with an injury or illness—because that puts a pause on hockey. you know how much hockey means to your boyfriend, and seeing him so broken about not being able to play just wrecks you. in times like that, it’s the little things you do that help quinn feel better.
making him food and making sure he’s stocked up on drinks and getting his electrolytes. massaging his shoulders and giving him head scratches. if he’s injured you make sure he’s got everything in reach so he doesn’t have to move, and if he’s sick you make sure you’re in reach, because all quinn ever wants is you.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who isn’t a huge party guy. he prefers staying in—watching movies and hockey highlights until he’s falling asleep, preferably with you tucked into his side.
you’ve always been more outgoing than quinn, and mingling is one of your favourite things to do. so every now and then when you go out, quinn joins you. he loves watching you in your element—dancing with your friends and talking to anyone who will listen. and when you’re wrapping yourself around quinn, blinking and pouting up at him all pretty asking him to dance with you, quinn never declines.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who has a few lovey dovey nicknames for you—lovey being one of them. there’s a few more common terms of endearment like babe, baby and beautiful that often slip from his lips like second nature. they’re the safest ones, the nicknames he’ll call you around his friends and yours like it’s no big deal. but then there’s the nicknames he reserves for when it’s just you both—honey, his girly, and your personal favourite: lovey.
your nicknames for quinn are simple—usually just babe or baby. but on the odd occasion when everything feels really soft and intimate, you’ll can him bubba.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who’s love language is words of affirmation. he didn’t realize it until after he met you that it was his love language, but anytime you praise him or reassure him, quinn’s stomach swoops and his heart flutters excitedly. he’s obsessed with the way you speak to him, and he’ll never get tired of it.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who knows your love language is physical touch. you love being close to quinn. if you’re not sitting next to him, you’re sitting on him—trying to get as close as possible at any means necessary. you love wrapping your hands around his arm, and throwing your leg over his hips when you’re in bed together.
quinn can be a bit awkward when it comes to physical contact, especially in public, and you understand and respect that. so when you’re out together and he kisses your cheek or wraps you in a hug, it makes it just that much sweeter.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who may not always go out to parties with you, but will always drop you off and pick you up if you need a ride. it could be a local bar or a random sticky frat house, quinn will be there if you need him.
he’s the most patient human in the world. guiding you to the car while you babble about nonsense—completely hammered. quinn pulls over if you feel sick, even if you has to pull over 15 times in a 5 minute ride. he helps you shower if you’re sticky, and he puts you in pyjamas before you get in bed—no matter who’s place you’re at. quinn makes you chug water and take advil, and he makes sure you’re sleeping on your side incase you get sick.
and he doesn’t even mind doing it either. as long as you’re safe and okay, quinn will do whatever he needs to.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who says I love you first. you’ve been dating for 6 months, and spring is blooming in michigan. it’s the first really warm day of march, and he’s taken you to the pier for a afternoon date.
you walk the pier and have shitty boardwalk food—laughing, kissing and talking about anything and everything. dates like this are always your favourite. just you, quinn and the comforting atmosphere.
you had been mid talking about the book you were reading, a book that was making you angry because you claimed the plot was ‘stupid’. you were telling quinn about the main character, hands moving animatedly as you talked when quinn just said it.
‘I love you so much, y/n’ he said quitley. but you heard it, and your previous ramble comes to a halt. you blinked once, and then again, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. and then tears begin forming in your eyes, and quinn smiles. ‘don’t cry lovey’ he said, pulling you into his chest.
but of course you continue to cry, holding onto quinn like your life depended on it. and when you look up at him and say it back, lashes all wet and nose running, quinn thinks you’ve never looked prettier.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who has to be almost sneaky when it comes to having sex with you. you live in a dorm room with a roommate, and he lives in a house with four other teammates. quinn doesn’t have his own car, and neither do you. having sex is like trying to curate a spy mission.
you have to plan times you’ll be alone, which is usually in your dorm room between 5 p.m and 6:30 p.m while you’re roommate is in a clinical lab. that’s always the best sex with quinn because he doesn’t have to hold back. he holds you against the mattress with his body, and there’s a pillow shoved under your hips while he slips in from behind. quinn pounds you into the mattress until it’s creaks, and he has to cover your mouth to muffle your moans. after all, it’s still a dorm room and you have neighbours.
but there are times when you’re both too impatient and horny. his roommates are scattered through his house, half downstairs and the other only a room over. quinn’s simple and innocent kisses soon turn more heated, and before either of you can think logically, you’re exposing only the essentials so quinn can slip into your heat while he holds your legs open.
your moans are muffled with his lips, and he shoves a pillow between the wall and headboard to not give away what you’re doing.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who gets really stressed once scouts starts checking him out for the upcoming draft. you notice in the way his shoulders are tighter, and he starts to get a little distant.
of course it hurts your feelings, but you understand the pressure he’s feeling. so like the sweet girlfriend quinn knows you to be, you reassure him. you’re not too pushy, and you’re not overwhelming. you kiss him gently and whisper your confidence in him when it’s just the two of you, facing each other in bed—nothing but the moonlight illuminating you.
it helps him more than you’ll ever know.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who is a silent jealous type. he knows you’re social, and he also knows that guys love that. when you’re at parties and mingling your little heart out, lots of guys will try and make advances on you.
you ooze confidence, and your smile is so fucking pretty that quinn almost understands these guys. but you’re his girlfriend, and the sight of these boys trying to touch you and flirt with you makes his blood boil.
of course you don’t entertain them, but that doesn’t stop the jealousy that stirs within your boyfriend. you can always tell when quinn is feeling jealous because his body gets tense and he pouts like a little boy. it doesn’t matter where you are—could be the beach and strangers are checking out your body, or a grocery store and a man compliments your smile, quinn always has the same jealous reaction. and that’s no reaction at all expect that frown.
when you see it you’re instantly moving, wrapping yourself around quinn and giving his pulse point a little kiss. and when you murmur that you love him, quinn always cracks.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who even when you’re fighting, never raises his voice at you. it doesn’t matter how frustrated he is, or how pointless your argument is, quinn would never yell. most of the time is just makes you angrier, because why can’t he just put you in your place—especially when you know you’re being annoying and stupid. but quinn always just tries to problem solve in a calm, soothing voice.
but don’t worry, he puts you in your place in other ways ;)
ღ bf! quinn hughes who asks you to stay with him for a few weeks in the summer at the lake house before the draft.
if quinn wasn’t in love with you already, seeing you with his family would’ve had him falling. you always cook breakfast with ellen in the morning, the two of you giggling and chatting like you’ve known each other for ears. you go golfing with quinn and his dad, and even though you suck at it, jim has nothing but praise and encouragement for you.
jack and luke tease you like you’re their sister. they push you into the pool and steal your fries when you’re not looking, which always makes you laugh. you blend in with his family so well, quinn can’t do anything but smile and admire it all as it unfolds.
you sit with quinn during bonfires and movie nights on the couch, sharing quick kisses when you both think nobody is watching—news flash, somebody is always watching, which usually ends with his mom cooing or his brothers teasing. you and quinn both wake up a little extra early, stifling moans as quinn pushes into your heat in the uninterrupted hours of the morning. you swim like kids, go grocery shopping with his brothers, dance in the moonlight as taylor swift songs, make out on the boat when everyone else stays back. it’s perfect. its simply just you and quinn.
ღ bf! quinn hughes who you sit beside at the nhl draft. he’s nervous, your hand clutched in his clammy one while his thumb runs over your knuckles absentmindedly. just before the draft starts, you squeeze his hand three times, a silent I love you. and quinn squeezes back.
his name gets called and you feel like crying. he hugs his parents first, and then quinn turns to you, a smile on his face while your eyes begin to go misty. he kisses you, in front of the cameras and the crowd because he knows you’re going to be together for the rest of your lives, and the nhl might as well get used to you now, because you’re not going anywhere.
#🤍⊹˚₊ cute and hughesy fic#quinn hughes headcanons#quinn hughes fic#quinn hughes fanfiction#quinn hughes x reader#quinn hughes blurb#quinn hughes smut#quinn hughes imagine#quinn hughes#nhl headconons#nhl smut#nhl blurb#nhl imagine#nhl x reader#hockey headcanons#hockey smut#hockey imagine#hockey blurb#hockey x reader
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Norris Girls
Pairing: Lando Norris x reader
Warnings: none
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If Lando were to ask, in his perfect world, his girls wouldn't go to kindergarten, and they'd be homeschooled later on. If he were to ask, you wouldn't be working either. Your main and only job would be to pack up the girls and follow him around the world so he could have you around non-stop. But unfortunately for Lando, that's not the case.
After you had Izzy, you couldn't wait to get back to work and get away from home. You loved being a mom to your girls, but considering that you were mostly alone with the two of them, it eventually became too much.
Besides, you wanted to give them as normal a childhood as possible. Although there was no need for the two of them to go to any kind of kindergarten, you decided that you wanted them both to go so that they could socialize and adjust to school more easily later.
Adjusting to kindergarten was quite easy for Isla and didn't take long, considering that Isla is four years old and very outgoing and sociable, while Izzy, who is only two years old and is the complete opposite of Isla, had a bit more difficulty adjusting.
One of the problems was that they were not in the same kindergarten group, given that they were of different ages. While Isla enjoyed spending time with her peers, Izzy would cry every day when she arrived at the daycare, and when you would come to pick her up, her eyes would sparkle with happiness.
Pre-season preparations were already in full swing and Lando already had his hands full. For him, vacation was long over and every day he was more and more prevented from spending as much time as he wanted with you at home.
Today, Lando was returning from a business trip and went straight to the daycare to pick up Izzy and then Isla. He was in a hurry to get there on time, but due to the traffic jam he was a little late, so every kid left earlier than Izzy.
When Lando entered the room, Izzy didn't immediately notice him because her back was turned to him. His heart broke when he saw her sitting on a small chair at a small table playing with some blocks, patiently waiting for someone to come pick her up and go home. He stopped for a moment and silently observed her.
"Izzy? Look who is here." The young teacher said making Izzy quickly turn to look behind her.
The moment her eyes met Lando's, Izzy burst into tears.
"Daddy.." Overwhelmed with emotion, she rushed from her chair toward him. At the same time, she was crying because she hadn't seen him in a few days and because, of course, she wanted to go home as soon as possible.
"Hey, baby" He knelt as she ran into his arms.
"Daddy" She kept saying crying into his neck.
"Is my little girl ready to go home?" He asked rubbing her back and kissing the side of her head.
"Yeah" She sobbed.
"It's okay, it's okay" He comforted her. "Why are you crying?" He asked putting her cheeks between his hands.
"I-I missed you, da-daddy" She said looking up at him with her big teary eyes.
"I missed you too, munchkin" He said picking her up in his arms.
"Daddy's girl, isn't she?" The teacher commented.
"All mine" He smiled proudly kissing her cheek before saying goodbye to the teacher and heading toward the car.
"Did you play with other kids today, baby?" He asked while putting her in the car seat.
"A yitto"
"A little?" Lando chuckled. "Did you have fun?"
"No"
"Why not?" He asked as he buckled her seat.
""I yike bein' wif you mowe."
Lando's eyes almost filled with tears at Izzy's words. He bent his head toward her and showered her face with soft kisses. "I like being with you too, baby. We have a whole week together in front of us, I promise"
"Otay"
When Lando and Izzy came to Isla's kindergarten to pick her up, Lando almost fainted when he heard that she wasn't there, knowing she should be.
"What do you mean she left?" Lando scoffed. "Did my wife pick her up?"
"No, it wasn't mrs Norris, it was a man that was already-"
"A what?!" Lando's eyes widened in disbelief. He didn't even let the woman finish her sentence, and the worst-case scenarios were already running through his head.
"Oh, no, no-" The poor woman was so confused when she realized what it sounded like.
"Who came to pick up my daughter?! How could you possibly let anyone but me or my wife come to pick up our daughter?!" Lando wouldn't let her get the word out.
"Mr. Norris, please calm down." The woman said a bit frightened. "Last week Mrs. Norris came with a man named Max to pick up your daughter and the gentleman left his personal information. Your wife said that in case she or you were ever unable to come, Mr. Max would come. I forgot his last name, but he showed me his ID and I remembered his face. I swear I would never put any child in danger and give it to a stranger, including your daughter."
As soon as Lando heard the name Max, a stone fell from his heart, but at the same time he turned red with shame and he immediately started apologizing to the poor woman.
"I am.." Lando sighed running his hands through his hair. "I'm so sorry. My wife didn't inform me about it and I reacted in the moment.."
As he drove, Lando couldn't stop thinking about how he had snapped at that woman. His thoughts also wandered to dark places like what if some stranger had really come for your daughter and taken her to who knows where. It was one of Lando's biggest fears that he couldn't shake from his mind all the way home.
"Daddy!!" Isla squealed with delight when Izzy and Lando entered the house.
He put Izzy down and grabbed Isla lifting her up as she ran into his arms. "Hey, pumpkin" He hugged her tighter to calm his thoughts from earlier. "I missed you" He said nuzzling his nose against her cheek.
"Look what I got" She said, showing him a new toy he hadn't seen before.
"Wow, who got you that?"
"Mom bought it for me"
"It's awesome, baby. Where is mom anyway?"
"Mom's here" You said as you appeared in the hallway. "She is waiting for her husband, whom she loves so much that she even made him his favorite lunch, which is already waiting for him on the table."
"Oh, yeah? If she loved her husband as much as she says she would have informed me that Max had permission to pick up our daughter from daycare." Lando smirked as he pulled you towards him into a hug and pressed his lips against yours.
"I didn't tell you that?"
"No, you didn't tell me that, so I attacked the teacher in the most wonderful way there is."
"Lan..you didn't.."
"Yup, I did. I insulted her before I even let her finish her sentence.." Lando said embarrassed, hiding his head in your neck. "You know that's your fault, right?"
"I know and I can't wait to face miss Jones on Monday" You said rolling your eyes and wrapping your arms around his neck. "I'll put her apology gift on your card just so you know."
"Make it generous, I'll survive"
When you were all ready to sit down at the table to have lunch, Lando wanted to check with his older daughter her knowledge about stranger danger so he decided to ask her some questions.
"If a stranger says, hey little girl you wanna come see the puppies in my car?, what do you say?" Lando asked Isla who was sitting across from him and peacfully enjoying her spaghetti.
"Um, yeah" She nonchalantly replied to which Lando lost his appetite.
"No.."
"Or yes..?" She asked raising her eyebrow.
"No, baby, no!" Lando started sweating. You watched them from the side trying not to laugh even though it really wasn't funny, but Isla's confusion was kind of funny.
"..si?" Isla tried in spanish and that's when you lost it.
"No, we don't switch the languages!" Lando said before turning to you to scold you for laughing. "Y/n, that's not funny?"
"I'm sorry, I know it's not. It's just that I think our daughter is a smart little girl and I trust her. She just got confused a little"
"Well, that's what I thought too, until now at least." Lando quickly switched to full protective parental mode. "Isla, baby, we never, ever, ever talk to strangers and we don't follow anyone we don't know, okay? That is not safe!"
"But what about the puppies? I love puppies, daddy" She said innocently, slurping a piece of spaghetti into her mouth.
"Oh this is going to be such a long day.." Lando sighed wiping away the beads of sweat that had already formed on his forehead.
"Lan, it's alright, calm down. We'll deal with it."
"What if my boyfriend is asking that? Can I go with him?" Isla asked sending Lando into an additional unexpected shock.
"Oh my God.." He whimpered looking at you.
"Yuck!" Suddenly Izzy spoke up after hearing the word boyfriend. Lando worked hard to teach both Izzy and Isla that boyfriend means yuck, but it seems that only one of his daughters remembered it.
"See? Someone is actually listening to me. That's how we do it! Good job, baby" Lando said giving Izzy a kiss on the cheek. "And you missy, you better eat that spaghetti quickly because you're about to have a whole lecture about people we don't know. Don't even get me started about boyfriends!"
And you knew it would be just like Lando said, one very very long day ahead of you.
#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1#lando norris#lando norris imagine#f1 one shot#lando norris smut#lando norris x reader#f1 imagine#f1 fluff#lando norris x y/n#lando norris fluff#lando norris blurb#lando norris one shot#lando norris fanfic#lando x reader#lando norris x you#f1 x reader#f1 scenario#f1 smut#f1 blurb#f1 x female reader
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OKAY SO FIRST ASK BUT OH WELL-!
I noticed that, when I was re-reading your shadowpeach bio au, that the art style for the comics/art has changed, DRASTICALLY.
Is there any reason for that??
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These are from the very first arc! And I got nostalgic to see how far this story has gotten 🤧.
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And these are the recents! (Aka some of my favorite panels 🤧🤧🤧).
So um yea- any reason? (Also LOVE your work, hope you do more even after the story is finished!)
Because, like everything in art, when you draw something, or a character, for the very first time, you are mostly trying to copy it, and unless you have a reference for every angle, you don't know exactly how they are supposed to look in your style. After, give it, 50 times you draw the same character, you understood how it looks and how you want to draw it in a way that it's comfortable for you (without ever using a reference)
It's like when you have to mold a new pair of leather boots to your feet. it's uncomfortable the very first days, but then after a while THEY (the original style/character) molds to your shape (YOUR style)
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can we have bed time with dad!spencer, his baby boy and reader?
Jude has brown eyes like Spencer. They have the same mouth and nose, the same thoughtful gaze. “That’s me,” Spencer says, Jude’s back to his chest, an arm between his legs to keep the little boy steady, “and this is you.” He points at Jude before smoothing a hand over his chest. “See us? That’s dad and Jude.”
“Us,” Jude echoes.
“Yeah, that’s us.”
Jude works his lips up into a smile.
They smell like talc and lavender oil for the teeny tiny burns on Jude’s fingertips. He touched the oven door a few days ago while it was still on, Spencer gets hot remembering how hard Jude cried. It took more kisses than he bothered counting to make him stop screaming, an ice pop held to his small hand with a hand towel wrapped around it, squeezed to the bathroom door together —the first place Spencer could remember seeing a towel, Jude still sobbing.
Spencer wants Jude to associate the bathroom with normal things. Peeing, showering, and not the little burns. If he can have happy associations, that’s better. Like dad and Jude’s night time routine, where Spencer brings him in here to brush his teeth and dab his face clean with a cloth. Some nights he needs to detangle his hair, or give his baby an impromptu shower, and some nights Jude is already asleep by the time Spencer remembers these things.
“You’re really handsome,” Spencer says, pointing at the mirror, “see? You’re beautiful. See your smile?”
Jude giggles excitedly. “I am beautiful,” he says proudly.
“Exactly, you’re beautiful. Are you happy?”
“Yeah,” he says, tipping back, his curls tickling Spencer’s nose.
“Are you comfy?” Spencer whispers.
“Think so.”
“You think so,” Spencer says, beaming to himself as he kisses the top of Jude’s head. “You’re smart, Judey. Okay, how do we know we’re comfortable? Are your clothes tight? Do you want to take off your socks?”
“No.”
“Okay, good. Does your mouth still taste all minty from the paste?”
A flicker of disgust. “Yeah, it does.”
“I’ll get you your sippy cup. You don’t seem tired, are we having a story?” he asks, voice turned to fatherly syrup as he shifts Jude around. He turns off the bathroom light and shuts the door behind them as they leave.
“No, I wan’ be in the big bed.”
“You do?”
“With you.”
“Okay, that’s okay, you can be in the big bed, are you sure you don’t want a story too? We can read about Edward the rabbit again.”
Jude doesn’t bother answering. Spencer tends to read to him every night unless Jude has expressly shouted that he doesn’t want one, ‘cos that’s what his mom did for him, and Spencer loves his mom.
Spencer fills Jude’s sippy cup with water (not so much a sippy cup as a bottle), and they retreat together to the big bed. In the middle of the bed, tired and curled up and waiting for them, is you. You perk up enough to drag yourself to one side of the bed as you kick down the sheets.
Spencer isn’t used to this, but he should be. (This, because there isn’t really a word for it? For being friends and for not being intimate and for sleeping in the same bed together whenever you stay the night.)
“Hi, baby,” you say, holding your arms out for Jude.
Spencer gives him over. Jude suckles his drink, a picture of the baby he was when Spencer first got him as he turns into your chest. He’d need all the help he could get back then. You’d given more than he could ever ask for, and Jude knows you for that.
You tip Jude against you and press yourself flat, your hand spread over his back.
“Are you reading Edward Tulane tonight?” you ask quietly.
“Just a bit. Couple of pages.”
“Sounds good. You okay, mister?” you ask Jude.
He nods around his drink.
Spencer turns the light off and the lamp on, bathing you and Jude in a kind orange glow. The mattress sinks under his weight, dipping under yours, encouraging you closer together in the middle. You barely notice the outside influence, shuffling across the pillows to rest your face against Spencer’s arm.
“Did you want milk?” Spencer asks him. “You can have some, it’s okay.”
“Minty,” Jude whispers.
“Minty,” you whisper in support. “Daddy takes good care of those teeth, huh?”
Jude loves being spoken to sweetly. He closes his eyes as you pull him like a curve to you, squished and cuddling. You’re his mirror, eyes fluttering shut as you sniff his hair. Spencer loves your smile —he knows what you’re thinking, because he knows what you’re thinking. Jude still smells like baby.
“Maybe this book is too sad,” Spencer says, thumbing to the last page he’d read from.
“It’s not too sad, and we won’t be awake long.”
“My Judey told me he’s not tired,” Spencer says.
“My Judey needs his sleep,” you whisper.
Jude smiles and lets the rest of the cup fall away from him. “Can say you love me?” Jude whispers.
“Who, baby?” Spencer asks.
“You and you,” he says.
You take a deep breath, whispering grandly, “I love you.”
Spencer follows suit with a hand wrapped around Jude’s calf. “I love you, too. So much they don’t have a word for it yet. You know your middle name, you know what it means? Anwil, it means loved one, because I love you a lot. And I have forever and ever.”
“And ever?” Jude asks.
Spencer rubs his leg softly. “And ever. More than Y/N does.”
You gasp in offense. “No way!”
Jude giggles but settles as you run your fingers through his hair. Spencer lays down and cracks the book over his chest, falling into his usual reading cadence, though he doesn’t bother much with special voices. Jude’s eyes are already shut and he’s jelly on your chest.
He leans over mid story to brush hair from Jude’s ear. “I love you,” he says, to be sure.
Jude says something back that sounds like, “too.”
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid drabble#reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fic#spencer and jude
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hear me out on bully!sukuna okay...
warnings; highschool setting, DUBCON, dry humping, thigh fucking, unprotected sex, sex in a confined space, semi-public sex, breeding, sukuna is kinda mean but is a simp at the same time, groping, cum in panties, just lots and lots of cum, "just the tip" he lied, mentions of pregnancy risk, ?cheating, sukuna the toxic tsundere but is horrendously down bad and perverted, eventual or mildly submissive sukuna?, this isn't gonna be the healthiest relationship - but its to be expected tho bc its a bully fic so..
Word count; 5.5k
bully!sukuna bothers you because he has a weird complex with you - preferring to be outright hated by you rather than deal with indifference or facing possible rejection.
it's often teetering on the edge of actual bullying; his existence is more of a nuisance than a serious distress to you.
he often loves getting on your nerves by tripping you up with his foot, only to catch you himself, or he purposefully bumps into you in the hallways making you almost topple over - like the fucking asshole he is. and you'll never forget the time you happened to get paired up with him on an assignment and the bastard had the audacity to try and take you both down by not doing his part. in exchange for his participation, he had you carry his bag for him around school for a week...
and he only gets more thrilled the more you fight back or retaliate.
sukuna likes to call you names, often using very condescending and colourful insults against you. and he likes to harass and chase off any potential boyfriends that come your way. that last one pisses you off the most. you want a boyfriend so bad, and that bastard is being such a huge cockblock. god forbid a girl wants to get laid. all your friends have had their first times already - why can't you?!
and he's back at it again too, after finding out that another guy confessed to you at school today. you accepted it. obviously when he wasn't watching. for a damn reason.
he finds out your last class was P.E today and you find yourself cornered in the locker room, empty of girls except for you. you ended up lagging behind as you were texting your new boyfriend over your phone after class. you try to walk past him to go home, but he traps you against your own locker.
you end up snapping back at him, having had enough of it.
"what is wrong with you? you know what? i think you're obsessed with me!" you shout back, shoving at his chest.
"who do you think you are, to stop me from getting a boyfriend... what, do you like me or something?" you speak without thinking, in a fit of anger.
"i bet you do! i bet you go home every night and jerk off to daydreams of me. is that right?" you go off, pushing every button you can.
sukuna falls silent. you expect him to argue back, to deny all your claims fiercely, and then go storming off, having heard enough of your nonsense.
but he's glaring at you, tight lipped, ears and cheeks turning bright red.
"...why're you silent all of a sudden? say something..." you continue awkwardly. "don't tell me... you actually...?"
"shut up," he hisses at you. "just shut up, for a second."
he wears an expression you've never seen on him before, and seems to be thinking about what to say next. he looks as though he wants to say something.
you open your mouth to tell him 'nevermind', but the sound of a small group of girls approaching the locker room is audible, which interrupts the both of you, and you panic. just what kind of rumours would spur on if they caught you and sukuna like this in here? you only just got your first boyfriend, there's no way you're gonna let this bastard ruin that for you!
thinking quickly, you open up your locker and roughly push sukuna inside, and then jump in after him. you shut the locker door quietly and peek outside through the little gaps at the top. the girls come in, having come back to get something that they left behind. what terrible timing.
one of the girls walk up a little close to your liking and you end up moving your body back as far as you can, your back pressing up against sukuna without thinking. and then you're startled by the low and quiet groan you hear behind you.
whipping around, you see sukuna with clouded eyes and a tightened jaw, barely able to fit inside this narrow locker. but he doesn't find it in himself to feel uncomfortable or annoyed at the situation.
after all, your ass is pressed up tightly against his growing bulge right then and there.
you were right about what you'd said earlier. he'd always daydreamed of a moment like this, pumping his cock at the thought of doing lewd things with you...
you turn back to the front, panicked. what the fuck? why does he look... like that?
kinda hot...
shaking your head, you try to ignore your beating heart, praying that the girls exit the locker room soon so that you can quickly escape from this situation.
meanwhile, sukuna's hands struggle to keep away from you as his brain begins to short circuit, dick helplessly twitching in his pants, chest heaving but it being of no help - as the locker fills with the scent of you in it, the sweetness of your shampoo and perfume, making his heart pump harder.
you slowly shuffle forward a little, trying not to lean against him so much. when are these girls leaving... you think to yourself. they've started gossiping amongst themselves, sitting on the bench. goddamn it!
large hands fall onto your hips and pull you back toward him. you feel him grinding his crotch against your ass, and you know that whatever is poking you is definitely his fucking boner.
"what the fuck, sukuna? s-stop," you whisper to him as quietly as you can.
sukuna has stopped his thinking in itself entirely. whatever's making him act right now is nothing but his pure and selfish desires. there's no way he can resist you when you're the one who climbed inside your own locker with him. he needs to relieve his ache somehow.
he gets more and more handsy with you as each minute passes. his large hand snakes up to fondle your clothed tits as he continues to discreetly dry hump your ass.
you should be disgusted. you should jump out right now and snitch on him and call him a molester right in front of these girls.
but good god, this feels like... nothing you've felt before. his wandering hands. his immense horniness. this tight enclosed space. the size of his boner. it's all making you excited in a weird way, and you're starting to feel aroused at your core.
sukuna is doing his best to get some pleasure from this minimal friction he's getting inside his tight space, but it's not enough. the desperation and arousal claws at him, his dick hurting from how tightly it's sitting in his pants. he swallows on nothing.
fuck it. he's already started. why hold back now?
you feel a shift behind you and the sound of fabric and a zipper being undone. is he...?
you gasp softly when something hot and hard gets pushed between your thighs. it's... it's pulsing. you can't believe this is happening. with sukuna, out of all people? should you be mortified or intrigued? you fear that the latter might be truer.
there's ringing in his ears. not a single logical thought is occupying his brain as he thinks purely with his dick at the moment, having waited so long for a moment like this. fuck, he's so hard. and it only excites him more that you haven't leapt out of this locker yet, running away from him. even though you could. his heart is on the verge of beating it's way up to his throat.
small, shallow thrusts. you feel his heavy cock rub up against your inner thighs, and both of his large hands are now groping your clothed breasts lewdly. he unbuttons your blouse, and then messily pulls down your bra, as he's desperate to feel the real thing, and you can't muster the strength to swat him away. when his fingertips tease your nipples, you have to stop yourself from making any noise. you've always wanted someone to touch you there...
never did you know that someone would be sukuna. you grab his wrist in a fit of desperation.
"you're a fucking pervert... what the hell are you doing?" you tell him a tad bit loudly, trying to deny the heat in your cunt.
"... did you guys hear something?" one of the girls suddenly ask outside.
your heart drops to your stomach as this sets off a panic inside you again. a big, warm hand clasps over your mouth, shushing you effectively.
"quiet..." he mumbles into the shell of your ear, and it weakens your knees. it never occurred to you that he's always had an attractive voice. a wave of goosebumps wash over your skin.
you look down. you can get a tiny peek of his tip whenever he thrusts in... it's so fucking big. you can't possibly fit that inside you, could you? when you catch that it's glistening with precum, your pussy squeezes around nothing.
one hand still over your mouth and the other teasing your tits, sukuna is busy slowly chasing an orgasm, regardless of the girls that have gotten a little wary outside. they soon forget about it and continue their pointless chatter.
fuck... his cock is so close to your cunt. the thought of it makes him shudder. he's almost there.
your hands are semi-clawing at his hand that's still against your mouth, when you suddenly feel him cease the incessant groping at your breasts. instead, it goes under your skirt - a finger loosening your panties up to fit his fat cock beneath the flimsy fabric.
there it is. your bareback fuckin' pussy. he has to bite his own lip to hold off groaning out loud. he does his best to slide his dick in and out against your slit - being restricted in movement due to the tight space, but make doing somehow.
you're actually thankful for his hand covering your mouth up, as you would've definitely moaned out loud if it weren't for him. it's unreal how turned on you are right now. does he feel it? all the slick pouring out of you? it's so, so strange. you were so sure that you didn't want this with him before, but not anymore...
it grazes over your clit over and over, painfully teasing, and you need to orgasm so badly.
sukuna jolts his hips against you, giving a final short thrust as his tip catches the fabric of your panties - he presses his own face against your neck to effectively silence himself as he reaches his first high.
you shudder as his dick pulsates between your thighs so strongly, making a hot mess in your underwear, cum spilling out in thick ropes - you feel the heat of it on your poor cunt, and you shiver as sukuna inhales deeply against your neck, his breathing wavering, dick aching for more even as it continues to spill heavily, creaming your panties. his tongue licks a stripe up your neck, causing you to shiver.
it's a pleasure that's greater than he could've ever given himself alone. but he wants more. he needs more.
you're in the middle of trying to gather yourself again, but you again, feel him moving his hips. just what is he up to now...?
your eyes widen when you catch onto how he's trying to thrust himself inside you now. there's no way... you struggle against him but he holds you still - mouth still firmly silenced by his palm.
the best he can do is have the tip inside. but for now, it's enough. he doesn't care - as long as he can get whatever pleasure that's available...
"j-just the tip..." he whispers with the smallest voice he can manage, against your ear again. it turns you on so good.
you can't help but enjoy when he gropes at your chest again, his tip bullying it's way in your desperate and wet hole, popping in and out, in and out, in and out.
even with just the tip, you're about to lose your mind. you want more, but at the same time you're scared what'll happen to your mind if he shoves that whole thing inside you.
sukuna's brain is yet again short circuiting as he dips the tip of his cock into your hot and slippery cunt - making him feral and desperate to get deeper. yet, what's stopping him is this confined space that suffocates him. there isn't enough oxygen for both of you here, and he wonders whether it's you or the lack of oxygen that's making him endlessly breathless.
oh, he's close again.
he's going to cum again, but this time inside. you want to protest, but you've always wondered... does it feel good to have it spill inside? regardless, you still try to struggle against him purely because you don't like the thought of sukuna knowing that you're enjoying this. even though it's already too late.
he holds you so tightly against him - before letting himself loose once again - tip poking into your pussy as he pumps inside, balls clenching. your hole is welcoming, and it puckers around him mind numbingly, milking his heavy cock for everything he has. you feel the warmth of his seed reaching inside you but not very deep - most of it trickles back out onto your panties. he twitches against you harder and more intensely, hips shoving into you messily.
you're both out of breath...
...and that's when both of you hear the girls leaving the locker room with muffled laughter, successfully avoided noticing you and him inside.
they turn the lights off before they leave, and the locker room turns dark and silent. you're now sweating against sukuna - and the moment you feel his hands loosen against you, you push the locker door open and step outside, unsure of what exactly you're trying to run from. sukuna himself? or the fact that you might be forming some kind of attraction to him? to the way he treats you?
but alas, no matter how fast you think you are, you could never beat sukuna's reflexes. in that quick momentum, he's pursued you outside and grabbed your arm - before pulling you back and shoving you against the now closed locker door.
"where do you think you're going?" he asks with a deep and low voice, vein popping on his forehead and looking desperate and an intense blush being permeated on his face. why is it that it's always made you feel so squirmy, whenever he cornered you like this? the size difference, the strength difference... the pervert here is not only him, it seems.
your needy gaze flutters from his eyes down to his exposed cock. it's veiny, throbbing, and leaking messily. it looks heavy and most importantly... it's so fucking big.
in the blink of an eye, sukuna has hiked your legs up, holding you up against the lockers, making it so that you cannot run from him again. it's game over.
"having the nerve to try and run after seducing me with your ass..." sukuna mutters angrily, lining his dick above your cunt and tummy, showing off how deep it'll reach if he slid it inside.
"no- i didn't..." you protest weakly, heart hammering with excitement. "idiot... let me down."
you tell him, despite your arms that loop around his neck.
"your voice is lacking it's usual sharpness," sukuna tells you breathlessly, flipping your skirt up and pushing your panties aside. it's still wet with his previous loads. oh- he can't think straight.
"wait-! something that big won't fucking fit!" you tell him, only now the fear beginning to hit you. moreover, you're afraid he'll end up breaking you and stop all rational thinking - this is dangerous.
"it will. i'll mould the shape of your insides to my fuckin' cock," sukuna insists, eyes focused on your wet glistening pussy. so pretty.
he pushes it in. but he doesn't stop there. he pushes it in all the way. balls fucking deep.
your eyes widen and when he thrusts the whole thing in one go, you well and truly break. legs trembling, pleasure washes over you and you cry out a moan.
"fuck-! did you just cum? are you cumming?" sukuna asks, panting, slowly sliding himself in and out as your cunt spasms around him. soon enough, he speeds it up and makes sure his tip is bullying your cervix with each deep thrust, eyes rolling back as your walls welcome him so warmly and clamp down on him.
"haah- haah- mm, fuck! you're so fuckin' tight! ugh, 'm gonna bust again," he slurs messily, hips moving non-stop. the unkempt bush of his pubic hair gives friction against you adding onto your strange sensations of pleasure. drool begins to roll out from the corner of your mouth.
his balls have never felt heavier as they slap against your wet ass each time he slams his cock inside, slick pooling out of you and creating droplets on the floor. he has a lot to give you... and your cunt is being so agreeable, the way it sucks on him, warm and wet. it's turning him animalistic, no thoughts running inside his brain except to fucking breed this hole. breed you.
not inside... not inside... you think, not realising that you're not saying it out loud.
"i'm gonna do it inside. i'm gonna-!" he hisses, hips stuttering at the last second.
"ugh- shit! 'm c-cumming... fuuck... fuck!" sukuna cusses deeply, thighs trembling as he continues giving tiny, but sharp thrusts even as he's spilling into you while buried to the hilt.
it's hot. you can feel that it's thick. there's so much. even more than his two previous loads. sukuna's face being twisted in pleasure puts you in awe - and you unknowingly tighten your pussy around him as he orgasms inside, joined to you hip-to-hip.
he's never felt such a deep seated pleasure in him before. he continues to gasp and shudder with every stringy spurt that he knows is reaching your womb. what if he actually knocks you up? what if his seed takes? it's a scary but thrilling thought. the thought of you swollen with his baby... all rational thinking has been thrown out the window due to this pleasure.
sounds that you never could've imagined coming out of sukuna continue to spill from his lips... he slides his cock in and out and squeezes every last drop out of himself, and he suddenly brings his lips to yours, kissing you feverishly. both of you pant over each other while making out messily as he slowly begins to thrust into you over and over again. he's going to get addicted to this. he's going to crave your pussy everyday from now on.
sukuna sucks on your tongue like he wants to swallow it. your arms hold onto him for dear life.
all too suddenly, he brings you off the locker, arms hooked under your legs and palms supporting you by holding onto your ass cheeks.
the kiss breaks, and catch sight of sukuna's lust-filled eyes as he moves you up and down his cock using his monster-like strength. and you're held up by him like this, you can't do anything to stop him. just cling onto him and take what he gives you.
"f-fuck, sukuna... ooh-! t-too deep," you mumble with tears in your eyes, gasping from the way his tip kisses your womb effortlessly. he's seriously too big for his own good.
"keep saying my name like that- it'll only make my dick harder," he pants, continuing to use your pussy like a fleshlight. his thick load has made it even wetter. he can feel your slick beginning to cream up around the base of his cock now, and it makes his chest well up with something like pride. does he turn you on that good? this hole of yours refuses to run out of lube.
the absurdly obscene plap plap plap sound of flesh against flesh, makes for the lewdest echo in the locker room. that, paired with the mild darkness, and the possibility of being seen by someone coming in during after-school hours, makes for the perfect thrilling atmosphere for such feral sex.
it's driving you mad. the echoing, the subtle anxiety, the smell of his sweat.
it's marvelous...
another orgasm hits you like a bullet train. gasping, you whimper as he continues fucking you through it this time, relentlessly thrusting into you regardless of your pulsing walls.
"shit... your cunt's clinging to me," sukuna groans, feeling blessed to see you get undone by him, by his cock. the fingertips of his large hands against your ass sink deeper, the pleasurable knot in his stomach getting tighter once again.
"you and your uselessly big dick... fuck you," you chide breathlessly, doing your best to keep your sentences clear even as he plunges into you with an unforgiving pace.
"clearly not useless when it's made you cum twice now, right?"
"shut up-"
you get cut off when he begins to thrust faster, as you witness the very moment sukuna's eyes become blank with pleasure, getting ready to empty his balls again.
"slutty fuckin' cunt. latching onto me so greedily... can't stop- thrusting-" he mumbles, gripping onto your ass tighter.
you can't help but sigh with pleasure when he begins to fill you up again, twitching and pulsing like crazy inside you as he spills so much seed like he's peeing.
"ohh, shit... cumming s-so hard..." he breathes out shakily.
you're starting to feel full. but you get the feeling that this still isn't the last one. desperate kisses are pressed against the side of your neck as he takes some time to relax a little again, thoroughly finishing deep into you, hips jolting every now and then.
he carries you over to the bench in the middle of the room, where he lies you down and brings your knees closer to your chest, fully exposing your cunt to him, whole. his dick still squeezed into you.
with a hoarse shaky groan, he slowly drags his thick cock in and out of you in this position, with only the heavens knowing how he is still hard after so many orgasms.
you give a small yelp as he speeds up - your plush walls embracing him warmly and filling up his balls once more. god, he doesn't think he'll ever have enough of this pussy. of you.
"idiot! e-enough.. take it out... i'll get- pregnant-" you warn him not-so-convincingly, with gasping moans between each word.
"c-can't... you're... sucking me in so good... can't stop-" sukuna replies with no thoughts in his brain other than to relieve the throb in his erection again. it's driving him up a wall, too. the flesh of your ass that softens the impact everytime he drives his hips into you. your squeals and whines of euphoria. your exposed breasts and glistening clit. he burns every detail into his brain, to make sure he remembers forever...
he doesn't even know what number round this is, but it amazes even him how he feels like he's already edging close to another climax. it's pathetic and ridiculous of him. but he can't help the fact that you push him over so easily.
the number of tissues he'd run through just from jerking off every time he thought about you all night... you have no clue.
recalling those moments makes him feel even more determined to chase this final orgasm even more rigorously. it won't be difficult, not with how your cunt swallows him up so nice.
"fuck.... i- i like you. i've always liked you..." sukuna mumbles out the sudden confession slowly.
"stupid... bastard... you say this now...?" you say as you sigh in pleasure, almost being close to your own climax as well, this position setting off yet another deep arousal in you. after all that bickering and tormenting - he has the audacity to confess to you? only after cumming inside multiple times?
"can't give any excuses can i?" he voices with a curt laugh - finding himself to be pitiful in this moment as well.
"but it's true... i- fuck- i like you so much..." he groans, hips getting faster.
your eyes begin to blur with tears again... sukuna thumbs your clit gently... and then you arch your back with a gasping squeal. sukuna too, hisses as he pumps you full for a final time, letting his dick drain itself in your fluttering hole, hips and thighs jerking uncontrollably while his tip leaks spurt after spurt through your cervix, overflowing you to the maximum.
after dumping his final load, he slowly drags his large, twitching cock out of you with a pop and lets it rest against your gaping cunt, pulsing weakly against your clit. his thumb pushes your panty lining aside to keep your pussy exposed for him to see. your hole is still gaping and thrumming, as if missing him already and he's watching with awe as big globs of his spend trickle out of you thickly. if he wasn't so exhausted, the sight of this would've made him hard again.
sukuna lets go of you and lets your legs rest on the bench, as you're still panting from the exertion, mind numb from that last orgasm. he seems to loom over you for a second, before leaning down, arms caging you against the bench, knee between your legs, to kiss you on your glossy lips. it feels good, but you wouldn't want to admit that out loud to him.
"i like you." he repeats again, after breaking away from you. he wonders why it had taken him so long to admit this fact. once he got it out, it became an easy thing to say. you look at his face and he looks so pathetic in your eyes, the usual look of cockiness and mischief being wiped away. he says it as if he's pleading you, and you know what he's asking for, what he's unable to say out loud. he probably wants to be your boyfriend.
it's strange to see the puppy eyes of your literal arch nemesis, and it's also strange to hear his voice give you a love confession. it makes you mad. it makes you angry. not because you hate it, but because you don't hate it.
he sees it. he sees the instant your eyes glint with anger, and he very swiftly dodges the head butt you try to give him at the very last second.
"move, idiot," you say sharply, glaring at him.
alright, he probably deserved that one.
you stand up and fix your bra and blouse before gathering your things from the locker before leaving without another word - sukuna follows you outside in a fit of mild anxiousness.
"hey-"
"you. take responsibility and buy me some plan b pills. and a pregnancy test kit," you interrupt, looking back at him.
"...alright," he responds rather obediently, after a nervous swallow.
after you turn back around to continue walking, the tiniest smile grows on your face... sukuna looking nervous is something you never thought you'd see. maybe you can use this to your advantage.
your phone vibrates in your hand. it's from your new 'boyfriend'. a sweet message saying he's excited to see you again tomorrow. you delete the notification with a little bit of guilt on your mind. you'll leave tomorrow's issues for tomorrow.
in front of the chemist, you languidly stand around outside waiting as sukuna does as you'd asked him. truth be told, it was because you didn't want to buy them yourself, out of embarrassment. you know he doesn't care about how people sees him, so no harm done there.
when he comes back out with the bag, he holds it out to hand it over to you. but when you try to grab it, he lifts it away.
"you're gonna break up with him, right?" he suddenly asks, with a rather serious expression on his face.
you ignore the question and try to grab the bag, but he avoids you again.
"...right?" he emphasises. he doesn't intimidate you at all anymore, not after knowing about his feelings for you.
"it's none of your business?" you tell him, finally snatching the bag. he doesn't look too pleased about that answer. you take the pills quietly and shove the rest into your bag.
"okay. now go home," you shoo at him. "i'm tired."
"you haven't answered me yet," he says firmly, holding onto your wrist.
"you'll have your answer tomorrow," you reply in an exasperated tone, shaking off his grip.
"and just letting you know. if it turns out positive, i'm never speaking to you again," you warn him with a deadpan face. in the back of your mind, you're pretty anxious about it, but you know according to your cycle, today wasn't a fertile day. that, and with the pill... it should be alright.
sukuna stiffens up and opens his mouth to say something, but shuts it again.
"and don't follow me. if you do, i'll also never speak to you again."
you're not that serious about not talking to him ever again, but you believe he deserves to feel as anxious as you do.
"... i wasn't planning on stalking you anyway. jesus," sukuna mutters, kicking at the dirt on the ground.
you narrow your eyes at him, and then continue your way home.
he scratches the back of his head in frustration. it's like he's skipped a lot of steps towards you and it's coming back to bite him in the ass. ah, well. nothing he can do about it now.
sukuna starts praying that the test comes out as negative.
-
in the end, you decided to become the asshole and just break up with the guy over text. what was there to even really 'break up' anyway? it was for less than a day...
regardless, the news seems to run across the entire school and your friends begin to pester you about why. you can't tell them the truth. what could you even say? 'oh, i got railed good by the one guy i despised in school and it made me end up changing my mind'? fuck that.
he walks towards you after school with seemingly high spirits.
"so... i heard you broke it off after all," he approaches you after hearing the good news. you'd been ignoring him all day, but he's hoping you'll stop once the day was over and there was no one else around to watch them.
you continue to give him the silent treatment, walking along without sparing him a glance.
"hey," he grabs your forearm to stop you from walking.
"stop ignoring me. please."
you only spare him a glance because he added 'please'.
"...i don't see how that changes anything between us," you finally respond.
"right. surely not," he responds, voice thick with sarcasm.
"is that the correct attitude you should be taking? i broke up with him because i felt bad i fucked someone else while we were together. not because i like you back," you shoot at him, crossing your arms.
"oh, give me a break. you were barely with him for one day-"
"sukuna. do you want me to like you back?"
sukuna falls silent, looking at you with annoyance yet also simultaneous desire.
"if you want me to like you... then you need to work for it. make up for all the mean things you've said and done to me."
"...how? what should i do?" he asks, daringly, stepping forward towards you.
you wordlessly take your bag and shove it against his chest with an aloof expression on your features. it startles him for a moment, but looking at your face, he understands what you're asking of him. he slowly smirks and slings your bag over his shoulder, on top of his own.
"easy. anything else?"
"...i'm kinda hungry. take me somewhere good to eat. you pay."
"so... a date?" sukuna hums teasingly, trying to hold your hand.
"nope. you're gonna act as my lackey for a few weeks. it's payback. after that... well, we'll see," you say as you dodge his hand.
he can't wipe the smile off his face. you're clearly playing around with him, but he doesn't hate it. it's another form of attention, is it not? he'll have plenty of chances to make you his from now.
little does he know... he's the one that will become yours in the end.
you know the drill! dot points bc im lazy as fuck!!
okay well, first off the test does turn out negative, lucky for him... from then on you make him wear condoms whenever you have sex
but before that, he spends a few weeks running around to try and appease you
everybody shocked to see the big bad bully is being so obedient, and little do they know...
mmmaybe you give him little rewards every now and then, some sneaky kisses or so, just to keep him afloat... and then you withhold your body from him again
still carries your bag for you everywhere
has to deal with the frustration of not having boyfriend privileges yet... always itching to touch you but you wont allow it until you think he deserves it
sitting between his legs but not letting him be handsy with you is torture. maybe he'll break the rules a bit and hug your waist anyway
love the thought of him borderline begging for your touch because he's so hard from spending so much time being so close with you and it's been well over three weeks since he's done anything remotely sexual with you
maybe you'll feel a little turned on by his pleading that you cave in a bit, and take him to the public restrooms for a few handjobs
he will take anything he can, the opportunist...
and you'll have plenty of fun edging and toying with sukuna until he's shaped nicely into being a good obedient boyfriend for you
bully sukuna trope was inspired and set alight by @gojos-thot-patrol btw, link to his fic here... mine took a completely different path but it was a similar concept in the end ✨️👌
Masterlist
#sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#sukuna smut#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna x y/n#sukuna x you#sukuna
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"Bye bye, I love you!"
Wanderer flinched at your words. His back that was facing you tensed and his hand that was reaching out to twist the doorknob was trembling as it was essentially hanging in midair. The air was thick and quiet as you eyed him in curiosity, waiting for his response, or what you would've assumed would've been lack there of. Typically when you said sweet things to the man, he'd brush you off with little grunts piercing glares.
"What'd you just say?" He asked cautiously, still facing the door. His voice sounded strange. Weaker. Softer. Possibly the nicest you'd ever heard him sound.
"I said goodbye and I love you," you repeated. And his reaction was the exact same, with him flinching like you'd tried to hurt him, "Is something wrong with that?"
A shrug was his answer. Trying and failing to play the entire ordeal off as nonchalant, but it was clear that those three words had caused him a bit of distress. A hint of guilt passed over you. You didn't want to pressure him to do or say anything he didn't want to.
"I didn't mean it like that if that's what you think. It's just a habit-"
"-no." He cut you off with a trembling, breathy whisper. He finally turned to face you, cheeks flushed and eyes glossy. He was wearing an expression that you couldn't quite decipher. A mixture of sorrow and adoration, "I-i love you too. Plenty."
He seemed to be testing the words on his tongue, almost as if he'd never said them before. There wasn't much time for you to be able to even register that he'd said it back. He tipped his hat to cover the raging blush that now spread across his face and walked out the door with even another glance back.
AN: I come from a family where we always say: "I love you," whenever we leave. As I've learned from doing it to people outside my family, apparently, it's not common. So I decided to write Wanderer's reaction to a reader who does the same :)
#genshin impact#genshin#genshin x reader#genshin wanderer#wanderer x reader#wanderer imagines#wanderer#genshin wanderer x reader#wanderer fluff#genshin scaramouche x you#genshin scaramouche x reader#scaramouche x reader
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