#idk girl we trying
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we're attempting a lil something. if all goes well then i'll put it up on kiricheu. if it doesn't go well then this never happened <3
#idk girl we trying#i just needed this hair so bad for gray#i gotta add in the pngs for the fly aways and everything one i finish the base mesh#wip
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Just saw an svsss fic tagged “kiss kiss fall in love” and now I can’t stop thinking of an svsss ouran high au where Luo Binghe put together a host club made of Yue Qingyuan, Liu Qingge, Mobei-Jun, Shang Qinghua, Tianlang-jun, Zhuzhi-lang, and honor student, Shen Yuan (who’s older brother, Shen Jiu, might murder the lot of them), who stumbled into music room 3 one day and is now their errand boy that Luo Binghe is obsessed with.
#luo binghe (and tamaki suoh’s) canon compliment daddy kink ™#mobei jun is more a fan of Shang Qinghua that ignores the girls but is the main reason girls show up for Shang Qinghua in the first place#he’s a Qinghua fan#tianglang jun and zhuzhi lang have the best chance of pulling off the hitachiin twins#alternative was the Shen twins but that would ruin the Shen yuan as haruhi vibe#Shen Jiu is replacing haruhi’s dad#we all know Yue Qingyuan is trying to seduce Shen Jiu not Shen Yuan but Shen Jiu’s probably oblivious#yue qingyuan#liu qingge#shang qinghua#luo binghe#tianlang jun#zhuzhi lang#mobei jun#shen yuan#shen jiu#shen twins#svsss fanfiction#svsss#scumbag self saving system#scum villain self saving system#ouran high school host club#crossover au#bingqiu#liushen#moshang#qijiu#cumplane#idk the rest of the ship names
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Marvel Meow (2021), Nao Fuji | Professor X and Magneto
Bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#professor x#magneto#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#erik magnus leshnerr#snap scans#i dont scan ever please forgive me for. Everything jvAE:KJ i tried my best to match the purple as how it looks in person#i love the purple used for this whole comic .. its really nice#all the comics have different colors its neat yall should check it out if youre able. its a lovely silly collection#BUT GIRL PLEAAAASSSEE IM CRYING#as a part of my Visiting My Family For The Weekend trip my bro and i went to the store#and i told him about the wolverine cat comic and the whole collection and he found it while we were browsing ....#naturally i got it. because i love the idea of cats being heinous freaks ESPECIALLY to my faves#this all did happen because of a cat. btw. phoenix possessed one while scott and jean were baking a cake#which had everyone trying to catch it. leading to. this. jWLRAKJAWRLKJKJ#this is 1000% has 'we'll be back by 8PM please keep the house clean' vibes i'm sobbing LIKE WHERE ARE THEY RETURNING FROM#also can i just say ... i love it when american comic book characters get the manga treatment#idk i just love it ... i esp love how wolverine's drawn in these comics but. this aint about him#i just wanted to gush about my favorite old people LIKE PLEASE CHARLES IS GOING TO HAVE A STROKE I SEE IT#the fact they still got that goofy lil 'welcome back charles and erik' banner im going to be sick. theyre the whole mansions dads#anyway i have an assignment to do. because my prof hates me Who The Fuck Makes An Assignment due At 12:59AM#bye bye hpoefully ill be back with my own doodles ajvlekjla
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They had a kind of mutual unspoken gender envy situation as kids where Ginger liked doing 'boy stuff' more while Bunny liked doing 'girl stuff'; both of which were strict secrets from their parents ofc . So they hid their toys in each other's rooms and pretended to be into them to cover for each other 🧡 I imagine Bunny was really into mlp or smthn similiar as a lamb and had to ask *Ginger* to ask their parents for an mlp thing for Christmas so their dad wouldn't berate him for wanting a 'girl's toy'
#hoof draws#hoofology#bunny + ginger#also i got really attached to their secretary/nanny type character i made up in 3 seconds#this kinda relationship is special to me idk....#even as kids they have this unspoken 'both of our genders are fucked up and we're not doing it right . so we will cover for each other' thi#g. ginger accompanies Bunny to the store so she can start trying on skirts and such to act like she's the one buying girl clothes#despite being visibly. very butch
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satan: my top surgery was successful.
mc: thats great! my bottom surgery is next week. i cant believe were both gay AND trans!
mammon: i scammed a guy on facebook marketplace
#girl do NOT ask what this is idk either#i was trying to fall asleep last night and this was the only thing i could think about im sorry#incorrect quotes#obey me mammon#obey me satan#obey me mc#obey me#im kinda lazy to tag rn sorrey#obey me!#obey me! shall we date?#obey me swd#obey me shall we date
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son boy raccoon trash can man suffering in a dnd au as a cleric bc his warlock will not stop committing murders and he has to keep coming up with reasons murder is valid to convince the gm its fine and under control
#my characters#oops i fell in love#right is trying his best in the au to think about all the logic behind killing someone despite being a cleric SPECIFICALLY#bc he refuses to hurt anyone irl or in dnd and ok fine their warlock can have a little murder as a treat#and the body count is adding up and hes like ... so tired..... please can you not kill for five minutes im running out of excuses#fwiw he has the weird logic of the group in the base plot and the guy who is the gm here#is v open about ok but if we ask right then hell give an unhinged answer completely thought out and rationalized#and in fact asks him hey i know you refuse to hurt people but im having a debate with these two coworkers#if you had to commit a crime for aaaaaanyone on the planet who would you commit a crime for#and he doesnt even hesitate to say luca obviously to which the asker is like WHAT ABOUT MY DAUGHTER#YOU WANNA MARRY HER AND WONT COMMIT A CRIME FOR HER? but LUCA? of all people???? not even brent?#and right is just so confused because first off brent would probably be the one committing a crime for him without being forced#(brent agrees with this statement with a shrug) and second off luca has really weird coworkers and thought he was getting stalked for a bit#due to a misunderstanding with said one weird coworker so yeah obviously right would threaten the guy with a gun which is illegal and#third and final how could he face his beloved angel (the daughter mentioned above) if he was a criminal#he cant tarnish a sweet little innocent girls opinion by committing a crime IN HER NAME gosh fuck off with that attitude#he has STANDARDS thank you very much#and the three at the table are all like okay yeah that was really thought out on the fly youre right#also brent do not commit any crimes for him please and brent just nods in agreement bc ok he wont commit a crime unprompted#also hi animal crossing emotes are so fun to doodle for bye#once again i am baffled by how different the colors look on my laptop in the art program vs posting to tumblr#im going to go insane at how different they look#IM COLOR PICKING FOR MY OWN OCS AND ITS SO WRONG LOOKING IDK MAN
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my attempt at mimicking @/negiwave2000 's artstyle (besides a drawing of it w/ my own ^_^) !!
he's such a huge inspiration to me........ pls check him out!
#he draws girls very well.... i aspire to be like him#ignore the little sentences all around idk i went crazy maybe#i was planning to draw like. rin crying and sobbing so thats why i opened AAaAAAaaAa ....#but i drew this instead :3 yiiippeeeee#btw i didnt have any references while trying to mimic his artstyle.... i drew only w what i rememberd so i missed a lot of detailss... :#oish scribblz#doodle#digital#ms paint is fun#ms paint#vocal synth#vocaloid#rin kagamine#negiwave2000#err.... i dunno....#it girl#<- WE HARDLY GET A REP BITCH SPELL IT AND HURLL... !!!#/LYR#art study
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the ppl that complain abt updates are actually so bewildering to me bc im literally 2k words into my fic and it has taken SO LONG 😞 not to mention the fact that no matter how long i wait for your updates, i truly never get bored because i js come on your tumblr everyday to see what you guys have been posting on here and it 100% makes up for the long awaited updates (not that you have anything to make up for anyway) you guys are truly SO incredible for what you do bc i could NEVER 😭 i literally talked to my friend abt ur fic and how the waits are usually long (wasn’t complaining abt it) and she was like “oh my god i could never wait that long for a fic” and i immediately came to your defense and was like “yeah but it’s okay bc the long ass chapters always make up for it and the fact that they post on tumblr almost daily”
prefacing my accidental ramble by saying that if we ever seem disproportionately annoyed at something someone said then it’s definitely because it is not disproportionate to Us!! little comments and things like that add up over time, so it’s rarely about just that one thing someone says and absolutely more of an overarching pattern that gets tiring really fast. and not to dredge everything back up again bc it’s rare that we get someone being super weird and rude outright about longer or delayed update times but we get soooo so many asks or comments etc like the one thea answered earlier which just include little remarks that come off as just passive aggressive and just kind of kill the vibe of getting a really nice message?? very much like “oh i miss when we only had to wait a couple weeks for updates but your fic is so good!” or “this was so good but don’t know how im going to wait months for the next chapter :(“ and just stuff like that which gets pretty frustrating over time, especially when they’re coming from people who blew through a 30k update in like 45 minutes lol. we see so much of this over on twt especially, maybe because we’re not as active there and people are not saying it To Us so they think we don’t see it but there’s also a lot of likeeeeee “i want to start acswy but im Traumatized by authors abandoning their fics so im just waiting until they’re done” or “i want to catch up but the update intervals are so long😭” and that sort of thing which is also just kind of frustrating to see come up over and over again, esp bc sometimes people have actually said that to us? like in our inbox??? for some entirely unknown reason??? like why are you telling us on this blog that you don’t want to read our fic until it’s done. good luck getting through 500k in one sitting then idk what to tell you 🤷🏽♀️
anyways all that to say thank you so much for your message of support it’s very much appreciated! sometimes the demands (even if they’re said as a joke) and little side comments that are slipped into really nice messages can def make us feel like our readers see as us people who are putting out a product and not people who are just trying to share a passion project with our little corner of the internet, but we also know that most of you are not like that and especially the people who regularly interact w this blog and send in asks and comments are so lovely! thank you for coming to our defense 🫡
#like if you don’t want to wait so long for an update then maybe try to read a little slower idk#not our fault we spent 2 months writing a chapter you devoured in 45 mins and are now already in our inbox begging for more#like damn girl. sit with it for a moment idk what to tell you#anyways#me: i’ll answer some asks on my lunch break#me: spends 25 minutes answering this ask#asks
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top 3 fave bbys in the burrito show (bonus SUPER LONG tags on how i feel bout the characters)
#my art#boruto naruto next generations#sarada uchiha#shikadai nara#inojin yamanaka#in no particular order except sarada is my fav- i think she shouldve been main focus- girl brings all of og team 7 together at all times#just her family history alone is very interesting and i WISH we had seen a convo with sausage boi about her uncle and just everything#but shes a pretty solid character on her own- VERY good mix of both parents yet still being her own self#shikadai is funny i really like seeing him- hes a sight for sore eyes- bro got EVERYTHING from his dad minus his eyes and maybe hair#his dynamic with boruto being besties is really fun to watch- sarada too- with both shika and sara being geniuses and all#i love inojin's simplicity and how ordinary he is.... its... realistic?#hes artistically talented yes with his ninja art stuff but everything else hes kinda... mundane? at times even bad?#Considering every other prev gen child's got all these cool stuff goin on- i like that hes just... kinda normal... i like that about him#boruto i actually do like as well- he'd make a GREAT support character- i love how big bro he is and how he wants to stand up for others#hes a lot like naruto in that way- and might be a hot topic to say this but i also like how - in his very first arc- boruto hates the hokag#not his dad but internalized that the job took his dad away from him- regardless on criticism i think that concept is really neat#i am not well versed in what the story is now for boruto- ive just kinda picked my snacks on what i wanna watch lmao#but i do wish there was more showings of slice of life for all the kids- cuz they are all really interesting- especially for prev gen's kid#>>wished they did timetravel arc with sarada so we coulda seen young sasuke & sakura interact with boruto and sarada T_T#one last note: borusara is very interesting- but i actually prefer them just being friends- at most friends with crushes on eachother#i do think its cute but i like the dynamic of it being unrequited idk its new for me i just prefer them as friends with crushes lmao#prob cuz they work as characters independently Im not really interested in ANY of the new gen hookin up- borusara is the most interesting#i mean it IS the ONLY one being pushed canonically but i like it- that boruto looks out for sarada and sarada worries for boruto#but ya i wish boruto was like mitsuki in being a side character - i think a LOT more people will find him less annoying that way#though- i REALLY want more sarada and sasuke dynamics being shown- actually the uchiha fam a TON more than what we got#they are just SUPER interesting to me lmao#im a sucker for the emo boy turns soft and has family and bonds with their kids- its one of my favourite things in media#i feel like scraping the ocean floor when im trying to find quality sasuke and sarada art pieces and story stuff#cuz ive exhausted all the content in these past what 2-3 years of knowing both boruto- and now more recently - naruto#(yes im one of those people who knew boruto before naruto- smite me)
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i would like to say thank you penelope scott for giving a girl’s always right to the world in this time of need (pearlescentmoon is being mistreated in the life series again)
#space rambles#life series spoilers#technically. to be safe#pearlescentmoon#it’s not officially released and idk when it will be but we have concert footage and AUGH. ITS SO HER#i just. ‘a girl’s always right/a girl’s always wrong/tell me what you want i can try to play along’#‘gentle fingers in between the kennel bars/liberate the pound dogs/don’t even think about the cars’ CMON MAN#also ‘am i manipulative or do i just want a break from it all’ and ‘it doesn’t matter that im sorry if im sorry sorry sorry all along’#and ‘i’m not here to win/so put me in my place’ LIKE. SO WL
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chat is this flirting am i being flirted with
#basically for context this isnt the girl ive been obsessing over for the past god knows how long#shes a friend of a friend that i dont really talk to anymore but we wrre in a group chat together#and we started talking and havent stopped and we've been talking since 7pm#and its now 12am#fyi this is the longest ive stayed up in like forever#SHE ALSO IS GIVING ME HER CINAMMOROLL FUNKO.IF SHE ISNT TRYING TO HIT IDK WHAT FLIRTING IS#first time being flirted with guys i cant tell if she's being fr or not though#she also gave the sim she made me her last name#like girl#!!!!!!!!#girlblogging#sapphic#thoughts ୨𖹭୧#my princess ୨𖹭୧
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I always find it so wonderfully interesting when people prefer IWTV S1 to S2 but, tbh, they're both great seasons of television.
When I saw S1 as it premiered, I consistently struggled with it. There were (and to this day are) parts of it that severely pissed me off. "A Vile Hunger..." (1x5) is still the episode I like to rewatch the least, for example. It took me watching S1 twice to totally love the show. And it's because, when I saw S1, I was holding onto the source material while I watched.
This was fucking stupid on my part, especially given I took a class on adaptation while at Uni and got the academic tools to discern what makes for a good adaptation in film terms (I've talked about other adaptations with people who are book readers first and they tend to view it way differently). Hell, I wrote a thesis on why Clueless is a great adaptation of Jane Austen's Emma regardless of the change of setting in both time and place.
But IWTV was way too personal to me, it went back to my childhood, so it was hard to let go. I did instantly love a lot of the changes. I love the time change and the change to Louis' race and background. I love that we saw more of Louis pre-vampirism and that show Louis has more complex reasons for his long term struggles whereas book Louis just seemed so whiny to me for no reason. On the other hand, I struggled with: why is it a second interview, why was Claudia SA-ed, why the DV, why is fucking Antoinette a canker sore that never leaves, why the fuck is Armand in Dubai, what the fuck is happening with this timeline? I couldn't let go and my viewing experience suffered for it.
When I sat down to watch a second time, I said, "Ok, do what you were taught and let the source go. Adaptations cannot be 1:1 due to the change in medium". And that's when things started clicking. I stopped viewing S1, and the show as a whole, as needing to use the books as a plot bible and viewed it as using them as a guidebook to function on TV terms and tell its own version of the story. It allowed me to appreciate the things I loved much more and to understand the ones I hadn't been so sure about and, even, love some of those things.
For S2, I went into it with that mentality already so I solely judged it on film/TV terms even though, having read books 1-4 and 6 and reading about the rest, I saw subtle things people with no knowledge of the source canon did not. Like when YT reactors consistently worried about Daniel being killed and I'm just filing my nails because, to those in the know, Daniel has massive plot armour. Or people being confused about Raglan James and I'm sat there like wtf does this trifling ass want? Nevertheless, I enjoyed the tale as it was told and what it was on solely TV terms.
Both season are great television but, to me, S2 just took it up a notch. Daniel Hart popped off extra hard. Carol Cutshall popped off extra hard in costuming (stg she played faves because why did Armand get more fashion slays than anyone else? ^_^). The sets went extra hard. The acting, which was already superb in S1 because this is a fucking excellent cast (Jacob, Sam, Eric, Bailey, and Delainey 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼), went harder as well because we have more players such as Ben Daniels doing the absolute MOST with Santiago, Roxane Duran being absolutely OUTSTANDING as the formidable Madeleine, and Assad Zaman stepping out from the background and giving a STUNNING performance as, to me, what's clearly the definitive Armand. To my taste, S2 is a lot less slow and I felt the pot boiling tension to the explosive ending build more keenly than in S1. And, again to my taste, the ending of S2 felt more satisfying because we have a sense of completion in Louis' journey rather than a, admittedly dope, cliffhanger. S2 has, arguably, the 3 best episodes of the show so far in "Don't Be Afraid..." (2x5) "I Could Not Prevent It" (2x7), and "And That's The End of It..." (2x8). For me, there's just no contest.
And yeah S2 isn't perfect either. The abrupt episode endings, for example, are a bit annoying---especially the end of 2x4. Yes, there's bits I would've changed a bit. (Though I will say, some book readers apparently wanted the show to include book Armand's Franken-experiments and I could very much do without it ever being included because it serves no narrative purpose other than to prolong Claudia's suffering. The show already goes hard to show Armand is a fucking asshole in other ways and it's gonna add to that in S3. We don't need that detail.) But, as a season of television, it just went the extra mile.
Still, I love that some people prefer S1. I love that they prefer S1 because it's more intimate or because it's more of a family season or because of the good Louis and Lestat moments or the good vampire family moments. Or maybe they love it for other reasons, it's all very personal.
I still think "In Throes of Increasing Wonder" is an outstanding pilot and it's one of my favourite episodes. Louis' confessional scene/the church scene is definitely one of the top moments of the show. Claudia's monologue at the end of "The Ruthless Pursuit of Blood..." still gives me goosebumps. Claudia stomping on Antoinette's fucking face and Daniel reading Louis to absolute FILTH at the end of "The Thing Lay Still" both make me clap and stomp like I'm at a concert or a sporting event.
Either way, S1 or S2, it's great TV and it deserves more love and recognition. I hope it gets it because it's truly deserving. Maybe we just need to hear our Brat Prince have his say for the uninitiated to awaken to it. S3 I have been seated since they made the call to release that teaser.
#interview with the vampire#iwtv#louis de pointe du lac#lestat de lioncourt#the vampire claudia#fuckass antoinette girl im sorry that I'm not sorry#daniel molloy#the vampire armand#the vampire santiago aka fuckface francis#madeleine eparvier#jacob anderson#sam reid#bailey bass#delainey hayles#eric bogosian#assad zaman#ben daniels#roxane duran#daniel hart#carol cutshall#cheers also to the 11 writers that have as a collective written 15 great episodes#and to the 6 directors who have made it happen#idk if i can fit them all but i'll try and also snaps to EVERYONE who worked on it because getting what we have thus far is a group project#levan akin emma freeman craig zisk alan taylor keith powell alexis ostrander for directing#rolin hannah jonathan dave eleanor coline ben shane heather a. zell kevin for writing#just my two cents but i love it as a whole truly
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do you have any specific headcanons for the teens??
I don’t really have too many headcanons for the teens. Most of them tend to draw from my own or my friends experiences/habits bc I find it funny so —
Taylor: has fibromyalgia and once texted the group chat something along the lines of “do you guys ever sleep so hard you wake up to a dislocated hip? I’m so good at sleeping” Scary was the only one who thought it was funny.
Normal: washes his hair in the sink more often than one should. He also wouldn’t have time to blow dry it before he’d put on the Teenie costume so his hair would end up crimped and half wet for the entirety of the day.
Additional HC that’s more family aligned: Before Hero and Normal were born, Sparrow painted a tree mural in each of their rooms. Hero eventually repainted her room when she was 12 but Normal’s tree is still visible :)
Hermie: is double jointed at the elbow and shoulder in his left arm. He can do this weird trick involving moving his clasped hands from behind his back, over his head, to his front. It’s weirdly bendy and uncomfortable to witness.
Lincoln: when he was around 8-9 yrs old, he attempted to convince his dads to help him make a sign that said “Tricks for Kisses (hershey kind)” around Halloween. He explained he was gonna do soccer tricks for kisses but did NOT explain he meant the chocolate kind. They did not make the sign.
Scary: when she was very little, like 4-5ish, Veronica signed her up for ballet classes. She did enjoy them until it was time for her first recital where, before even going on stage, she burst into tears and her teacher had to run out to collect Veronica from the audience. She was then signed up for soccer and was far more interested in that. Veronica still has the picture of Scary in her recital outfit in her wallet bc Scary couldn’t stand the idea of it hanging up in the house around Terry Jr.
#dndads#taylor swift dndads#normal oak swallows garcia#scary marlowe#lincoln li wilson#hermie the unworthy#I gave him my weird arm trick my friends and family HATE it but I think it’s funny :)#the link one is based on a real thing my little brother did except it was scooter tricks in exchange for real kisses from girls on THE BEACH#we also did not make him that sign#idk if you meant identity hcs but to be fair the teens kinda exist in a semi fluctuating void for me#so I don’t have anything solid in mind for them#but if I ever try to figure that out I…. don’t know lol
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I don't know if anyone else in the whump community has read 'A Constellation of Vital Phenomena' by Anthony Marra but it is genuinely a really good book and also has some of the best depictions of torture and its aftermath that I have read in fiction.
I wanted to share some of my favourite quotes, hopefully without too many spoilers as it is out of context, but maybe skip this post if you don't want to know anything at all going in.
To give a brief summary, the book centres around the lives of people in Chechnya during the first and second war between the Russian government (Feds) and the separatist rebels. The main story focuses on a man (Akhmed) who is trying to save his neighbour's daughter from being killed by the Feds after her father is taken away in the middle of the night. He does this by taking her to a hospital where he then volunteers. One of the people in his village (Ramzan) becomes an informer for the Feds after being tortured, and this is explored in the excerpts below.
‘Information the Feds would torture them for was written here on the walls for all to see. It was well understood among the men that the Feds had as much sense as two bricks smashed together. It was also understood that pain, rather than information, was the true purpose of interrogation.'
'During his first detention in the landfill, in 1995, in the first war, he had refused to inform. They had wrestled down his trousers, shown him the bolt cutters, and still he had said no. Screaming, thrashing, with his manhood half severed, he had said no. He had done that, and now he was ready to start saying yes.'
'He would have confessed everything, but they didn't ask, weren't interested, threatened to cut out his tongue and put pliers to his teeth if he spoke one more fucking word. Electric wires were wound around his fingers. A car battery was drained into his bones. God might have been watching, but it wasn't God's finger on the battery switch. The interrogating officers didn't speak. Instead he was an instrument they played, performing a duet, and in their own way they conversed through his sobs. They both wore very shiny shoes. That was all he would remember.'
'He had trouble walking, He had forgotten torture could be so exhausting. The new interrogator, the one with less shiny shoes, held him upright, using his whole body as a crutch, and helped him walk. He carefully wiped Ramzan's forehead with a handkerchief before opening the door to the next room.'
'The interrogator with less shiny shoes crouched behind him. His hands were wet. Ramzan promised everything, and the interrogator, like the parent of a child too old to believe in ghosts, watched him with disappointment, his clear eyes saddened by Ramzan's sincerity. The interrogator took off his jacket, rolled up his sleeves, laid the live wires on Ramzan's chest and mapped the border of their shared humanity. Ramzan offered his soul. He begged to be enslaved. The known universe contracted to the limits of the cement floor, and on it, the interrogator was both man and deity, prophet and god. By ten o'clock the interrogator with less shiny shoes asked his first question. By eleven the electrical wires were unwound from Ramzan's fingers. By noon he was allowed to dress. By one he was on the FSB payroll. He kept thanking the interrogator with less shiny shoes.'
‘Greed didn’t motivate his informing, at least not primarily; primarily he informed by necessity, to survive, for his love and hate and above all awe of the power wielded by the interrogating officer with less shiny shoes.'
'That was his greatest fear. Could he stay silent? Could he withstand what awaited him? He told himself that his love for the girl should fortify him against any torture, but this, like so much of what he told himself, was a lie. After all, he was squeamish at the sight of blood, what would he say when lying in a puddle of his own? But he saw no other way. He would pray for the strength to stay silent, for a quick heart attack, and leave the rest to God.' (This is Akhmed POV)
'When they threatened to beat me, I said nothing, Akhmed. When they threatened to beat me, I said nothing. When they threatened to electrocute me, I said nothing. When they threatened to castrate me, I said nothing. I said nothing, Akhmed. Whatever you think of me, you remember that once I said nothing when a wiser man would have sung. And the interrogators, they couldn't believe it. They called in others to examine me. I was there on the floor, and above their faces were dark ovals silhouetted by the ceiling lights. They had beaten me hard and I couldn't hear right, but I kept saying no, with every breath I had. The main reason they let me go, the only reason they didn't shoot me right there was out of perverse respect, some sort of professional courtesy. But I wish they had shot me, Akhmed, because the good part of me died there, and all this, everything since, has been an afterlife I'm trying to escape.'
‘I knew what was coming. I knew it never stops. They put a shame inside you that goes on like a bridge with no end, the humiliation, the fucking humiliation of knowing that you are not a human being but a bundle of screaming nerve endings, that the torture goes on even when the physical hurt quietens. People treated me differently when I came back the first time.'
#torture#whump#s talks#a constellation of vital phenomena#idk what else to tag this with tbh#electricity torture#beating#I don't think it counts as gore tbh but like viewer discretion is advised#I really like this portrayal tbh#because like torture sort of is effective for the feds but they dont actually care about the truth#ramzan is mostly just giving up people who gossipped about him and then just whoever he is told he has to invent evidence on#and like obviously there are characters who do not choose to inform#akhmed does not give up the girl we know this#but yeah idk it's intersting to me#like torture as something functional but also completely empty of meaning#also I just really like the writing#and the way it talks about the aftermath and the trauma of it that alters ramzan forever in some ways#but it's also clear that it's not just the torture that made him do it like#he is a complex character and he is also trying to protect his dad who relies on insulin to survive#and he also agreed to inform to save his friend who had his fingers cut off
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i think my biggest problem is that i've always been this kind of friend who's like "i may not understand your favourite thing in the world but i'm here to listen, support it with all my heart and be excited about it with you", so i kinda expect my friends to do the same thing for me. if it matters to you, it's important.
#i'm pretty sure that's the reason bel and i have been friends for years now#we're changing fandoms but we've always been super supportive about it like YAS GIRL TELL ME ALL ABOUT YOUR NEW BLORBO#my sister has always been like this too and sometimes without even telling me like#i literally found out last year that she's listening to twenty one pilots because of me (that's what she told me)#all the things i've learned about miley cyrus in a span of a year? you'd be surprised#well all thanks to one of my best friends who loves her so much#i could listen to him talk about her for hours (and sometimes i do) and i don't even like her music#and yes we listened to her together too#but he does the same thing for me with my favourite bands and it's fucking awesome#this post is chaotic as fuck but what i'm trying to say is that#i've always been this way#i don't care if i like it or not#i wanna listen to you talk about it because it's important to you so it's important to me#idk#last couple days have been a nightmare i just need a hug#i say whatever and whatever that i want*
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love when flint tries to be confident it is so awkward but it makes you wanna root for him . likes yessss go fireboy go
bonus quotes of them being condescending . being straight up mean in an attempt to have some kind of confidence . mean flint yay
#toontown#toontown corporate clash#ttcc#flint bonpyre#firestarter#fun fact. while i was making this post the fire alarm in my apartment went off and we had to all evacuate .#idk what happened but everyone is safe#thanks flint#“oh look a crispy critter” is crazy they are actually just pointing and laughing at you like a mean school girl#also their stupid awkward laugh . there is smth so special abt that#“i just sparkle dont i” is one of my fav lines of his#who does he think he is sayin that loser ass shit .#he is such a loser who is trying his best....
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