#idk could just be me rambling
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I think I won dating apps actually.
#the tumblr accent coming through right there#i just feel the need to applaud myself#for being a hige dork#thankfully gay people apparently like when you look stupid in front of them#something about similar lofe experiences#idk could just be me rambling#dating apps#dating
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saw someone saying something like "do you really think veilguard story would be better if you could do evil choices?" and actually yeah. i think if they let us act more like the dreadwolf on the "you are a paralellism to the dreadwolf" game, it would be more significant when the story tells you "you are a bit like him/you are nothing like him" because , thats how you chosed to play it.
#like i think the game could be good without the evil choices. but i would like a choice at all tho.#it can be just pragmatical vs idealist it can be about how much would you be able to give or sacrifice#how the game is now when you lose people it feels more like you failed more than you sacrificed them#veilguard critical#also#i can see all his memories and judge him in veilguard#but the thing that really made me be on his shoes#was the inquisition mission In Hushed Whispers#where you wake up in a horrible world and you just want the old one back#da4 spoilers#da4#dragon age#stuff like the emmrich mission i thought it was gonna be a paralelism to solas#of “would you sacrifice your people in order for you to have more power to save others?”#“would you move on from the dead or try to get it back ?” like it worked both ways#there was a moment in game i thought all the companion missions were thematicly connected to the themes of the plot#but idk the themes are there but at the same time there are not idk how to explain it#when varric is like “you are not like solas!!!” doesnt really work for me when its impossible to be like him#it never worked for me when charas in videogame tells you “you are X” for things that you are forced to do in game#and its always a gut punch or very satisfying when you actually chosed to do them#anyways im rambling
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qPhilza perching on people because bird
qFit: Mans is built like a brick shithouse—he can totally balance Phil’s additional weight. The first attempt is a bit shaky, sure, but nowadays Phil swoops down or hops up onto Fit’s shoulder and all Fit really has to do is jut out his elbow to give his friend a little more space for his talons to work with. Bam, he’s perched. Works out about 9.9 times out of 10, though Phil delights in trying to catch him off guard.
qEtoiles: He doesn’t have Fit’s bulk on his side, so he’s not as sturdy, but he is strong. The landing is usually a little rough since Etoiles has to work a bit harder to counterbalance the additional weight, but he always finds that center of gravity in no time flat. Phil usually perches with one talon on each of Etoiles’ shoulders since he’s not as w i d e, just so Phil can have a little extra grip. At some point, Etoiles tries fighting a mob while Phil is perched on him, and that goes exactly as well as you would expect.
qForever: Honestly, with all of the hard labor Forever does for his big builds, Phil was expecting him to do better, but the first (several) attempts end up with Forever stumbling over and knocking Phil off of him from his wild arm-pinwheeling. They eventually figure out it’s more doable if Forever himself has something to lean on (a wall, a chair, the butt of his pickaxe) and Phil puts one talon evenly spaced on each shoulder. Phil learns some new swears in Portuguese in the process.
qMissa: Flattened. Full-on face in the floor, mouth full of grass, wind knocked out of his lungs at Mach 5 the first time Phil tries. Phil apologizes profusely, but Missa���once he can breathe again—just rolls over onto his back and asks Phil if they can give it another try. It takes a long, LONG time, but they figure out that if Phil plants his talons on Missa’s shoulder pads and leans forward while Missa leans back, they have a small little window of time where they achieve balance. The best part? Phil gets a perfect view of Missa’s goofy little grin every single time.
#q!philza#idk what possessed me to write this i just think it’s funny#bird man perching on his friends/loved ones is so special to me actually#if you’re wondering how any of them could take the weight of a full grown man uhhhhhh bird bones. they hollow. yeah.#dont mind me im just rambling#qsmp philza#codebreakers#codebreaker duo#anarchy duo#sugar duo#death duo#pissa#(<-implied)#my writing
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i feel like poolverine easily could’ve been one of those “they’re flirty but it’s mostly unserious” situations, and for most of the movie yeah they were extremely gay, but wade’s been like that with other guys and it was never treated as a serious type of relationship before. they’re willing to die for each other, but even then the romantic aspect of their relationship could be glossed over because it’s a superhero movie, that’s just what they do, and they’re working together to save a whole timeline—it’s not just about them. but then the movie doesn’t end with them saving the day and moving on. i think this’s really the part that sells poolverine as a genuine relationship to me… logan’s leaving, and wade calls for him. he can’t stand to let him go. then he introduces him to his family, and logan stays. he doesn’t really need to stay, but they’ve both decided they’re better off with one another than without
#don’t get me wrong#wade and vanessa are going to end up back together again if there’s ever another deadpool movie#and then he’ll lose her again for whatever reason#because that’s just how it goes#ignore the fact that logan tells wade to talk to vanessa and i’d be convinced that the ending was supposed to imply them being canon tbh#not gonna delude myself into believing poolverine will ever be genuinely and seriously canon#but shippingwise#i think this’s why i’ve latched onto poolverine despite some of the similarities between cable & logan#with cable it was never gonna be serious#despite it being fun to ship them and enjoy their dynamic#but#with logan… storywise… it makes so much sense for them to be endgame#they both were at terrible points in their lives and really needed each other#not just to fix each other’s problems. but they needed someone who was so on their own level that they could fix each other#not in a healthy way. but#yknow#anyway#idk i’m kinda rambling about nothing here#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool#wolverine#wade wilson#logan#um#logan howlett#<- ….i guess#poolverine#deadclaws
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I think it's been generally accepted that the simplest answer to people asking if dnp are a couple is, "well they built a house together, so make of that what you will" because that's the only really concrete fact we know of that speaks to their current relationship status. but sometimes I think - damn, is that even just an important *clue* to the status of things? or is that kind of *it*? is there anything more you need to know about two people than that, at the end of every day, the only people they'd want to completely let their walls down around is each other? that only the two of them know what the other looks like first thing in the morning, still in their pyjamas & before coffee; or at the end of a rough day, cranky and stomping around and eventually tired and soft enough to say goodnight; or frustrated to hell over the menial tasks needed to keep a household going like doing the taxes or getting the right groceries..... I could keep going on. we might really never know whether dnp call each other husbands or partners or boyfriends or best friends or housemates, or if they're exclusive or open, whatever. but what we do know without any doubt is that they are It for each other. they are each other's no. 1 most important person. and that is most indisputably shown through the fact that they built a house together. they chose to create their own little world within the world. the place where they can be 100% who they are, 100% of the time. and they want to share that place with each other.
what more is there to know?
#fuck sorry why'd i get SO emotional#but i really do mean everything i said#i was just watching a video in their london apartment and it just hit me - they've LIVED TOGETHER for more than a decade#and literally nothing could be more important to know than that they LIVE. together. their lives are shared#idk. void please tell me if i'm making any sense!!!!#dan and phil#dnp#phan#rambles#*
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ok i swear i'm not going to talk about my breakup forever but the thing that just keeps bothering me:
i know that not getting what you need in a relationship is a COMPLETELY valid reason to end it but also. i feel like having a very vulnerable moment where i opened up about my struggles with intimacy and being relieved that i didn't have to keep doing things i wasn't comfortable with, then being dumped a YEAR later because of my lack of intimacy. is something i should be allowed to be very hurt by???
#ramble#sorry i'm currently in a phase of 'of course this happened' and 'oh i deserve this because i didn't give him what he wanted'#like he knew i was grey ace since the start. and he let it go on for SO long after i said i might be vaguely aro as well#if that's a dealbreaker for you bc of your love language then FINE but NIP IT IN THE BUD#he said he put it off because he didn't want to hurt my feelings but it only hurt me MORE#like you're an adult. grow the fuck up and communicate like one#holding your negative feelings in hoping somebody notices you're hiding them is what TEENAGERS do#and also i told him VERBATIM: i didn't think anyone would ever love me because i'm not comfortable with xyz. and he just confirmed that#idk i still feel like i'm being selfish because how could i expect someone to be in a relationship with me when i can't give them anything#also tmi but it's not like we did NOTHING. we still held hands/cuddled/were close. he just didn't have his tongue down my throat anymore#so obviously i'm assuming by 'missing affection' he just meant sex and as an ace person that just fucking sucks#also oh my god i HATED how much he would imply we were going to have sex. i would have to keep SAYING 'i don't like doing this'#he always spoke like it was inevitably going to happen and it didn't click how GROSS i felt about it until recently#also ALSO not to go there but i never told him WHY i struggle with it (it's sensory issues)#and like. what if something had happened to me that made it hard for me and i just wasn't ready to tell him. and then he did this#again sorry to overshare this is still just a lot for me and i have no idea if i'm being unreasonable#if you're ace and in a relationship please let me know bc i'm starting to think it'll end this way every single time
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look at yourself… you’re the true puppet.
#persona 5#goro akechi#akira kurusu#oof my art i guess#shuake#this was for a palace au zine that went on indefinite hiatus#and I like this piece far too much to let it sit in my drafts forever#so behold!#akechi palace au art be upon you!#the hand up top could be shido or maruki or yaldi whatever you want#I just think Akechi’s palace would be about control or lack thereof#and the masks he puts on that hide his true self from the world#but maybe that’s just the p4 enjoyer in me talking#hand could also be the true shadow akechi and the one on stage truly is a puppet#idk it’s whatever u want it to be like I said#I just thought this concept was Neat lmao#I’m also forever a huge fan of his line abt his final enemy being a puppet version of himself#and how that ties into third semester and the choice on 2/2#man I just love goro akechi#anyways that’s it ty for listening to me ramble#expect more persona art from me soonish I’m about to be released from zine secrecy jail for a couple projects lmao
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Sweethearts 💕
Less edited versions under the cut
+some other sketch I had of em
#kamen rider#kamen rider gavv#kamen rider valen#GavValen#or uh I think everyone calls em#chocogummy#let's take sfx pill together#mecha's shitty doodles#Anyway hope it is apparent that Valen is smiling? 'cause he is#sweetheart is tad of too mushy word for me but that's all that comes to me for this one </3#I don't even think of em in ship way yet much more of just “they look very cute together”#I honestly could talk about how I see em but uh#sadly for em my current headspace is taken by best match and idk if it'll change anytime soon#<been trying to draw something em too. but more serious so idk when I'll even finish that#anyway sorry for tags ramble I sure like doing that
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Is this anything
#Honestly the piglins do kind of look cool#Minecraft is so near and dear to my heart that like idk how to feel about this movie now as a whole#Scrolling the tag on tumblr and people bringing up the end poem and the things this movie could have been makes me :(#BUT in thirty years we’ll get an amazing movie!!!!#Maybe it won’t even take that long#Minecraft#minecraft movie#Minecraft trailer#Minecraft movie trailer#Anyway everyone should watch Alan becker’s animation vs minecraft s3 instead#It’s AMAZING and cinematic#mario bros#the mario movie#super mario bros#super Mario bros movie#the super mario bros movie#how do people tag it i love this movie but haven’t blogged about it#Animation#movies#fandom#dee rambles#i just had like an hour of stats homework my brain is fried forgive me
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Sketches of Nya from Hands of Time and Skybound!!
The outgrown Bob haircut phase
#i want a Nya suit to have Black as the main colour in her suit again pls#pls pls pls#Anyway this haircut is the point where she starts considering growing her hair out#hands of time and Skybound changed aspects of who she was and her life so it seemed natural for her to let herself physically change as well#fanart#lego ninjago#ninjago#lego ninjago fanart#ninjago fanart#ninjago nya#nya smith#nya jiang#Nya means sm to me and her character development and change through time matters sm to me#i think her hair has had many phases#representing who she was who she is and who she will be#Skybound was her turning point she was now apart of the team and not just kais sister of jays girlfriend#she was nya so she wanted to change her appaerence so she could put a distance between her past self#idk this is just a ramble nya just makes me insane
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It's mostly the fault of poor editorial practices that B&R is so heavily misaligned continuity-wise w/ the main batman book. But walk with me for a minute:
You are Damian Wayne. You are 14 years old and have had one of the worst years of your life last year. Which is saying a lot.
Your brother, one of the people you were closest to, got shot in the head and forgot who you were. Your best friend went to space for a week and came back 3/4 years older than you, taking away your previously established dynamic and leaving you to have to bond all over again w/ a new one. You may or may not have gone wayyy too far with your new superhero team, who now all hate you, because you fucked up big time*
And worst of all, when you do try to do the right thing, you end up forced to watch Alfred, a father figure to you, the only one at your birthday that year, the person who has been so patient, loving and trusting with you, even when you probably didnt deserve it...die. you watch him die, and feel it's all your fault.
And your dad never corrects you on that last point. So you run away.
First to your mom who can tell something's up with you, she knows you don't give up that easy, you decide not to stay with her because you remembered how actually, neither of your parents are good at communicating with you despite their best efforts, so now you're 14 and flying solo.
And you do fly solo. For a while. Make new friends, new enemies. You think you're better off for it. You've got your best friend and your brother back. They're not around as much. It's fine.
And eventually your dad tells you that it's not your fault that Alfred died. Bit late but it's appreciated. Really. There's a bit of a hiccup where you get possessed by a demon and wage war against your father but after that, all in all, you two are...together again.
You start to think maybe you want to give him another chance, for the two of you to be father and son.
And in a change of pace, it works out! It's going good, mostly. He insists you go to highschool, you resist, feel like he wants you to be something that you're not (wants you to be normal), but eventually you acquiesce for your own reasons. He cheers you on at soccer and nosies around at your fundraising events with the other parents and gives you a stern talking to about your choice of girlfriend. Because he cares.
Except all the while this is going on, your dad is currently having his brain slowly taken over by an evil version of himself that he created and every time you look away he's slowly tearing your family apart (your brothers are just barely keeping it together. The ones who didn't get lobotmized that is Jesus Christ). You keep taking his side in these conflicts, for whatever reason. Maybe because he promised it would be different this time, and it isn't** and you're going to stick with him until he keeps his word for once.
But at the end of the day?
It's like your brother says. You're not the one who saves him. Broadly speaking, you've made things worse and needed others to come save you. And what else is Robin really for? You thought it was about redemption and teamwork but guess you're wrong. It's about saving your self destructive, apparently two-faced and erratic father. And you can't even do that right.
* TT (2016) by Adam Glass is a racist ooc mess, but unfortunately it's still canon so I'm referencing here, though like a lot of works authors clearly wish weren't canon but are, it's been subsequently glossed over. Win? Maybe? Or not?
** again Zdarky's characterization of Damian is so outdated as to be ooc, and considering the way he constantly and explicitly uses it to illustrate Tim's strengths as robin, I'd argue there's. Also implications there. But the batshit insanity of the main batbook compared to B&R rn is crucial for this post, so I'm attempting to justify it. This time..
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#damian wayne#batman and robin#i know i already made an animatic of steph to tears over beers by modern baseball (you know the bit)#but this post has made me think of damian in this context. weeps#idk i read batman 138 for myself and the ways Zdarsky structures it to portray damian as inferior is just. AUGHH IT MAKES ME SICK#LEAVE MY BOY ALONE#the fact that josh williamson (not a perfect writer but i generally enjoy his stuff) had to single handedly save damian-#-after didio left the company and make him robin/a hero again#ONLY FOR THIS STILL TO BE HAPPENING THE MOMENT DAMIAN IS IN A NON JOSH WILLIAMSON BOOK#SICKENING#anyways. imagine if these titles connected and created a greater narrative besides building to event books. would be crazy huh?#that's not fair B&R is enjoyable in its own right and I'd rather have the main batman book touching less things to be frank#but still#if they ever do the theoretical tim/damian robins miniseries that lives in my brain maybe this could be discussed in some way#anyway <3
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swan lake x valkyrie
#enstars#my art#ensemble stars#fanart#shu itsuki#mika kagehira#shumika#HEHEHE hi i havent done tag rambling in a while#but this was a piece for hourly shumika's fairytale collab!#my group decided on swan lake so this is the scene in which prince siegfried is deceived and swears his love to odile instead of odette#i sat drawing for so many hours in a row bc i wanted it to feel just right 😭 i hope i was able to capture the moment well#i wanted odette and odile to both be mika because i found out that the two roles are often played by the same dancer#and i thought that was a REALLY REALLY cool concept i could try and portray here.. also note which eye colors are visible on each#gosh.... odiles outfit is based on mikas fs1 with the ribcage i love the ribcage i think mika should have another ribcage outfit#IDK WHY I WAS SO SHY TO POST THIS HERE LIKE I KEPT PUSHING IT BACK BUT its here now YAAY#hehehe anyway i think thats all i wanted to say.. i hope u guys see my vision..#let me know what u think!!#ok thats all byebye :3
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they would get divorced in one universe just to find eachother in another one
alternatively titled: sometimes you're the level-headed token flesh-head impulse-control-and-polycule-member of a stubborn, eccentric, and hearty telephone-headed drug addict, and there's cruelty in the world you deem fit to suicidally fight, and that either goes about as well as you'd expect it to, or you learn about love and the value of your life and junk along the way
#scribbles#milton r wallace#callum crown#phonegingi#sgt norm allen#norm allen#dialtown#dialtown a phone dating sim#..uh idk if callum and milt have a ship name orz#normgingi#milton norm parallels save me. Save me milton norm parallels#very specific but its why i prefer to look at the callum-milt-marla situation as like tragic polyamory#as opposed to a cheating one#it adds to the callum-gingi parallels. theyv both got polycule situations C:#though i suppose you could call a cheating situation a dark parallel to gingi's polycule the same way you could call#milton's entire deal a dark parallel to their relationship with norm/the narrator#However i just like tragic polyamory. my visions of milton and marla ALSO being in love yet having the mutual#realization that they hate callum more than they love eachother (esp milton) is highly specific yet also everything to me#misery loves company and all that jazz. a THIRD combination of people having divorce shit going on#this guys ruining my life IM GONNA FUCK HIS WIFE! (They are already in a consensual polyamorous relationship milton is just making it weird#Sorry these tags were going to be like meaningful discussion about this art and then i was enabled to talk about THIS AGAIN#OH YEAH this art in particular i discovered halftones and also started actually using blending brushes#milts face isnt drawn. obviously. but im imagining a kind of 'oh you!' exasperated fondness#as opposed to norm who's just a cranky little tsundere. jokes on milt though HIS relationship is HEALTHIER#also i will never pass up the chance to draw gingi and callum together#theyr both characters i adore drawing gingi's round shapes and different textures and callums cute little bolts#but also they do look soooo similar and yet so different its always really fun to do#and theyr just. my favs lol. my top 3 favs go gingi-mingus-callum hehe#Ok thats all. thank you for coming to my rambles#fig said i should post my art at better times and so i am and that means when i post my art im AWAKE ENOUGH TO RAMBLE ABOUT IT LOL
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OKAY question
i wanna reread choices and edit it but i can never make myself do it cause im like "ugh wow so long i simply cannot"
but also, every time i do reread parts of it i have like *thoughts* like SO many thoughts about it and about what i was thinking at the time and how that has or hasn't changed and what i was trying to do and what i love and what i hate and blah blah blah
SO the question: if i did like a lil read-a-long with soph thing, would anyone be interested? like maybe in the form of small podcast episodes where i discuss the chapters as i edit them and you guys can like tell me the different stuff you want me to talk about etc etc and then i will have the motivation to actually do this and also somewhere to dump all of my *thoughts*
or is that like, a stupid idea that no one asked for? i cannot decide whether this is leaning more on the fun cute side or the annoying keep this to yourself side, Y'KNOW????? so i ask
#like in theory i could do this on tiktok like a normal person#but tiktok terrifies me and i don't wanna#or i could just write posts about it#but i feel like that is going to be infinitely less fun to me than just like#going on lil rants#like extended public voice notes#but again maybe a horrible idea idk#sometimes i just WANT to talk about it like in depth because im a nerd#and i wanna love it again#okay sorry im done now#soph rambles#choices
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I would like to remind people that Chilchuck hasn't seen his wife in 4 years.
So he maybe wasn't there to see his daughters become adults, but he was there for the majority of their childhood.
When he left, Mayjack and Flertom were 12, and Puckpatty was 10. They reach adulthood at 14, so maybe yes, he was absent when they were still kids, but that doesn't mean he didn't maintained contact with them afterwards as far as I know. The thing he uses around his neck was a gift from Flertom, and he was using it when he met Laios's party.
#you can tell i love chilchuck#but yea#she left him for his daughters puberty#i know they're in good terms now. he and his daughters i mean#so its unlikely to me that he never contacted his daughters after wife left#its just me defending this old man's ass because he was there 70-80% of their childhood and left when they were no longer childs#they were all adolescents (10 and 12 in half-foot years must be like 14 and 16 i guess??? wich.. yea they joung but no childs literally)#it could have been better if he didnt leave but he's got 0 knowledge of why did wife left with the kids#and he assumes she doesnt wsnts him near the kids because they left with her#oooh#i love this old man#you can hate on him all you want but dont say he wasnt there for their childhood because he was. he had work yes but he was#dungeon meshi#chilchuck#dunmeshi#chilchuck tims#delicious in dungeon#fish rambles#my shit#maybe you were talking sarcasm or idk but i felt like doing a post to this tags so im sorry lol#dungeon meshi spoilers
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just got home from seeing miles and oh my GODDDDD. so much to unpack. SO MUCH. i’ll do a proper post tomorrow when my brain is remotely coherent again, but for now the headlines: he is (as always) absolutely fucking incredible live; i had not one but TWO super awkward run ins with him before the gig even started; i will never recover from hearing shavambacu; there was a VERY interesting moment when he was introducing “see ya when i see ya”; and, in the least creepy way possible, i may or may not now know what it’s like to be spat on by miles kane mid performance 🫠
#such a wonderful musician and an absolute GEM of a human being 💖#thanking all the deities for letting my health be good enough for me to go tonight 🙏🙏🙏#it was so ridiculously good#he really is so special live ✨#though i got sad vibes from him tonight too 🥺#i hope he’s okay#he was wonderful and talented and engaging but idk. it was just an impression i got#he definitely comes across as someone who feels things very deeply#like that was very much something i got the impression of last time#and he just seemed#idk#like maybe he could have used a hug from someone who knows him really well 🥺#but anyway#enough rambling from me#it’s so late and i am almost certainly making no sense at all at this point because honestly#who would be in my position??? 😭#miles kane#lulu posts
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