#but also they do look soooo similar and yet so different its always really fun to do

[bandtrees]

they would get divorced in one universe just to find eachother in another one

alternatively titled: sometimes you're the level-headed token flesh-head impulse-control-and-polycule-member of a stubborn, eccentric, and hearty telephone-headed drug addict, and there's cruelty in the world you deem fit to suicidally fight, and that either goes about as well as you'd expect it to, or you learn about love and the value of your life and junk along the way

[princesssarcastia]

2021 Harry Potter Fanfic Primer

im here to point fingers at the incredible authors that have enabled my new interest in HP content.  im still conflicted and upset about it, tbh, but for now we’re leaning into the curve.  we’re getting out our shovel and finding out just how deep we can make the hole we’re in.  hand in unlovable hand my beloved <3.  anyway, these fics are wonderful, their authors are wonderful, and you should go read their stuff. if there’s a star next to it that means im losing my mind over it and always will be.

Creatively Maladjusted, by elumish on AO3, 101k  (they also have a wonderful writing advice blog on tumblr, @elumish, which I recommend following if you are a writer) 

A very excellent re-telling of harry’s first year at hogwarts if he were sorted into Slytherin, plus some more not!fic or piecemeal re-tellings of his second and part of his third year.  Harry, in this, has a slightly different trauma response to growing up with the Dursley’s.  He’s a bit quieter, and the signs are a bit more obvious to the people around him, and I enjoyed that immensely. 

Honestly, if you’re going to get sucked into something you have absolutely no business getting sucked into, elumish is the way to go, their fic is incredible. their teen wolf fic is also immaculate, if you’re so inclined. 

Dissonance, by ImpishTubist on AO3, 2.5k (@impishtubist on tumblr)

Set during fifth year.  Oblivious!Harry has always been a delightful trope when well executed, and this is well executed.  Plus, some angst between Remus and Harry over what Umbridge has been doing to him.

I would certainly recommend a lot of ImpishTubist’s other hp work on AO3, like Lacuna.

blow us all away, by rexcorvidae on AO3, 23k (@rexcorvidae on tumblr)

In progress (like, updated last week in progress).  Currently in the beginning of Harry’s first year.  Fem!Harry, Indian!Harry.  Hagrid puts Harry in touch with Remus when she has questions about her parents, and they become reluctant, traumatized, angst-ridden pen pals who keep missing each other’s true intentions like ships in the night.  hot DAMN do I love this fic.  there’s hints of the way the dursley’s treat Harry peaking through in her letters, and I appreciated the attention to “hmm, her experience as a girl of indian descent in britain under the thumb of a bunch of white people who like being Normal may not have been gucci”

Definitely comb through the rest of their HP fic, too, I may or may not have gone feral over it.

Where the Heart is, by silver_fish on AO3, 15k (@kohakhearts on tumblr)

Woof.  This one said, “hey, harry was probably SUPER depressed in the summer after fifth year.  like, clinically.  maybe someone should do something about that.”  Fuck yeah.  Then this one said, “that someone was Snape.”  You all know my opinions on Snape; generally, Bad.  But damn if this fic didn’t wholly convince me by the end of it.  I thought it was a very realistic way for Snape to start seeing Harry as a person all on his own, and not a proxy for Snape’s angst over James and Lily, respectively.  The angst is wonderful, the ending is even more so.

*bernie sanders voice* I am once again asking you to read through the rest of the author’s HP fic.  a lot of them have similar themes; there’s actually a great one with Molly that i’m not reccing here, Wonder.

☆Bindings, Bindings, by Quietlemonhush on AO3, 60k (@quietlemonhush on tumblr)

WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS TO YOU HOW MUCH I ENJOYED/AM ENJOYING THIS.  If I had to pick a single fic and say “you, it’s your fault I’m stuck here,” it would be this one.  Anyway Lily in the afterlife is So Very Angry about how Petunia is treating Harry, and how Sirius is rotting in Azkaban, and how Remus is alone, that she literally brings herself back to life and drags James and Regulus with her.  All three of them are there to chew bubblegum and fix everything that went wrong after they died—and would you look at that, they’re all out of bubblegum!  There’s only Fury left.  That inciting premise is very crack, but every moment after that is very much not crack.  Lily and James love harry more than anything, the way a child should be loved; James and Sirius have the epic friendship of a lifetime; Sirius and Remus have staggering amounts of resolved sexual tension and take turns keeping each other in check; Regulus, though he realized that Voldemort and his family were shit before he died, is still unlearning all his racist bullshit and, also, years of trauma.  Actually, they’re all traumatized, but hey: now they have one another again and not a damn one of them seems inclined to let go anytime soon.  Quietlemonhush went, “hey, HP has a lot of Awful people in it, and a lot of Righteous people in it, and many of them are Very, Very Powerful; also, love is the most powerful force in the universe” and i said “hell yes tell me more right now.”  And then they did!

Quietlemonhush writes Sirius/Remus in a way that makes it sooo much fun to devour, so the rest of their HP fic is most certainly worth a look, if that’s your thing.

Rebuilding, by Colubrina on AO3, 113k (@colubrina on tumblr)

Hermione/Draco (*shrug emojis into the abyss* yeah, yeah, like none of us have ever been there before).  Takes place during Hogwarts 8th year, and while the beginning is, IMO, a little unfair to Ron, it gets much better.  Tells the story of Hermione and Draco clearing the air, learning to like each other, having some hormones over each other, and then falling in love.  Also tells the story of Hermione and Theo Nott becoming friends; the story of how every single 7th and 8th year student is fucked to hell by the war and the Carrows; the story of how they start an emotional support group about it and all become friends; and the story of, what the hell do you do with yourself after that kind of trauma?

I’ve been dipping in and out of Colubrina’s HP since before I was even on tumblr; I actually found them in those dark yesteryears when the only fandom interactions I had were on fanfiction.net.  Of such fame as Green Girl, which is an HP fic staple, and has also written a lot of wackier, crackier, and darker things than that.  If you don’t take yourself too seriously, I highly recommend many of their big HP works, though I imagine it’ll press some people’s buttons.  Colubrina’s work really does take up a corner of my mind whenever I’m in an HP mood, and will take up yours if you let it.

☆ all waiting is long, by shuofthewind on AO3, 149k ( @shu-of-the-wind on tumblr)

This is so well written that I can’t stop thinking about it.  It is occupying my mind when I lie awake at night, you know?  It’s one of those.  Hermione messes with something she probably shouldn’t have in Grimmauld Place, so when Sirius is sent through the Veil in the Department of Mysteries, she gets thrust into an alternate universe...in 1975.  Instead of handwaving it away, shuofthewind actually gets into the mechanics of it in a way that makes sense, to emphasize that hermione is never going home.  ever. The world she finds herself is shifted slightly to the left, quite a bit darker, but in a “the author is treating the idea of a society-wide conflict over blood purity much more seriously than JKR ever did” way, not a sensationalist way.  Now, Hermione has to grapple with all her grief at losing everyone she’s ever loved or known, the moral/ethical/magical implications of sharing what she knows about her future in an alternate world, and, you know, a goddamn war with people who want to murder her for being who she is.  This Hermione is smart, and she’s kind, and she’s powerful, and she’s making real friends.  If you hate JKR’s guts I’d go read this right now, because it delivers in all the ways she failed us.  It’s plotty, its got great world-building, and it pulls back the white curtain on the wizarding world to show you that, like real life, it’s multicultural and full of queer people...and the discrimination that comes with both.

shuofthewind write epics, mainly for the MCU, and I’ve read some of them a looooong time ago, so this fic kinda seemed out of left field for me but im SOOOO GLAD it exists.  If you want MCU fic you can sink your teeth into, go for it, but alas, they do not have any more HP fic (.......yet?)

Speak Now [+] Listen Now, by mrsfrizzle on AO3, 33k altogether

Harry reaches out to Remus for support because Umbridge is getting to him with her literal torture.  Remus, being a former professor, former mandatory reporter, person who loves Harry and has since he was born, and all around good man, tells Harry he has to tell someone, or Remus will.  It’s everything any adult looking back on that time in HP canon ever wanted, which is for an actual adult to say “what the fuck, those are literal chidlren” and then do something about it.  Then, a far more dangerous task: Harry trusts Remus enough to go to him about the Dursleys.  Harry and Remus’ relationship develops SO WELL, and there’s a bit of exploration about how Sirius may not exactly be guardian material, because he did in fact spend 12 years of his life getting tortured instead of growing up.  I think I’m actually going to go reread this right now, because it speaks to my id.

they do have some other HP fic which did not appeal to my hyperspecific wants, but may appeal to some of yours.  I think they’re also a published author, there should be a link on their profile page.

chase the stars, by Duskglass on AO3, 101k (@felix-duskglass on tumblr)

When Harry is five years old, a picture of him ends up in the Daily Prophet, and Sirius Black, Terror of Ministry Officials Touring Azkaban everywhere, gets a hold of that issue.  He then, in order: breaks out of Azkaban; crosses the countryside to Surrey; Finds Harry: Kidnaps Harry; Breaks Into Remus’ Apartment; starts processing (or maybe just acknowledging) his trauma from Azkaban, the war, and his childhood; and pines after Remus.  It’s a little plotty, and deals a lot (sometimes through flashbacks) with the specific awful things that happened to Sirius—largely because, after years in the constant presence of Dementors, those are nearly literally the only memories he has left.  It’s a wonder he’s got the strength to love Harry and Remus at all.  But then, maybe it isn’t.

This is a Very Serious Fic, but the rest of Duskglass’s HP work is actually just cracky enough to tickle your funny-bone, while still making you think “okay but why couldn’t we have done that in the first place.”

So!  That’s it for recs, for now.  These are all things I’ve found and read in the last month; if any of y’all are interested in my old HP recs, let me know and I can make a post for that, too.  While I’m still very conflicted about my choice of current fandom, I am not in ANY way conflicted about my taste in fic and authors.  Send these guys some love, read their fic if you’re so inclined, and leave some nice comments at the end of it.

[hext00ns]

ooh!!! thoughts on sonic boom?

Sonic Boom (like much of the franchise) is SO SO SO GOOD but I do think it coulda been just a biiit better. LEMME EXPLAIN CAUSE I DO LOVE IT SO MUCH BUT LIKE I HAVE THOTS™️

So I’ve seen some ppl complain they don’t like it cause it takes away from the original canon or it’s too silly or bla bla bla NO ITS FUCKING HILARIOUS Sonic Boom was actually the first Sonic thing I got into back in Collage when I first refound the franchise after dropping it at the end of middle school. At first it was kinda odd to see them look and sound and even ACT so different but there was still a humorous charm to the show that kept me around. Since I’ve gotten like SUPER back into Sonic again recently I decided to give the show a rewatch and not only do I hold a new respect and love for it but also more thoughts about it

When I first watched it I didn’t realize the Boom content was practically a whole different timeline/universe and after realizing that recently it honestly only makes me love the show MORE. When I first saw it I thought Sega was gonna completely reboot the franchise and this was the new Sonic. And like yeah I liked Boom but the idea of like 20+ years worth of characterizations and lore just to the wind like that freaked me out admittedly. However when I realized that WASNT the case I was much less scared of change and am now just ecstatic to have more Sonic content in my life!

Sonic Boom is so interesting cause it dives away from the norm to such an extent. The humor is much more satirical and wittily dry. Sonic humor has always been pretty witty but this just feels very much to the left. It feels like if the main franchise and MTV’s Daria had a cartoon baby which, as a lover of both, I fucking adore

It also changes the characters soooo much. Sonic is way less hyper and is arguably calm and even really like dry humor straight man kinda feel to him. It’s honestly such a fun and hilarious take on the character I can’t help but adore it. Eggman almost has like Ice King energies which is SO fucking funny and I am fucking obsessed with Boom!Eggman I s2g. There’s also like Boom!Eggman fan content where he is more like frienemy to almost parental figure to the others which I haven’t looked much into but just the fact it exists is p fucking rad I think the idea could be super fun but like I don’t think you could have a similar dynamic with regular Eggman fisndjsjjdjd. Tails, much like Sonic, also has a fun straight man energy to him. It’s honestly so fucking funny sometimes. Amy and Knuckles I admittedly was not very on board with at first but I’ve definitely grown to love them. Knuckles is so fucking himbo he’s so dumb I love him so much. And Amy idk how to describe shes just very to the left of her main counterpart yk?? Also I can’t lie every day of my life I miss Lisa Ortiz so fucking much I heard her voice watching Pokémon the other day and wanted to cry maybe it’s the nostalgia talking but I want her to come back as Amy djsbjdnsidjsjj but Boom!Amy is still really fun and funny and also wonderfully kick ass

The comedy is so fucking good. Like the comedic timing is fantastic a lotta times and the delivery of the jokes is PERFECT. I can’t express how often I’ll go on YouTube and watch Boom compilations and just, constantly lose my mind.

The designs of the characters, though not very drastic, are very fun!! Simple changes yet feel like whole new beings almost! I ADORE Tails with goggles and I want him to always have them forever. Sonic’s bandana is my FAVORITE thing ever and I always draw even main tl Sonic with one cause I just vibe with it so hard on god. Amy’s new dress is very very cute. My only thing is if ur gonna redesign Knuckles GIVE HIM HIS HAT BACK!!!!!!!!!! Didmsknsksjs

Also this is super small but I LOVE that they’re on an island/beach!!!! It always makes me think of Sonic OVA which is SUCH a good fucking movie and idk if that was on purpose or not but it makes me happy :>

And, of course, I can’t talk about Boom without talking about 💕🧡✨Sticks✨🧡💕

I ADORE Sticks SO FUCKING MUCH. She’s the funniest motherfucker in the whole show she is everything to me. Every day of my life I pray for her return when will she come back to meeee!!!!!! Her design is SO cute, they take the badger thing and roll with it, she’s apeshit and unhinged as FUCK and I’m OBSESSED with her!!!!!! She’s fucking everything!!!!!!!!!! If there’s anyone out there who’s skeptical of watching Sonic Boom DO IT FOR STICKS!!!!!! WATCH SONIC BOOM FOR STICKS!!!!!! SHES EVERTHING!!!!!!!!

However when talking about Boom I do tend to put my two cents into the basket of how I think it could have been a litttle bit better (and not just Boom as these two issues can be found in other places of the franchise as well but I find they’re very relevant and prominent in Boom as well). For one, I ADORE satirical and dry humor so much I really really do. However there are a few moments where it feels like the show is making fun of the franchise and the fanbase and, admittedly, I don’t like jokes like those in media. STH is not a perfect franchise and every fanbase has a good chunk of some of the weirdest batshit motherfuckers you’ll ever meet, but still when media makes fun of itself and it’s fans it just?? Idk feels like the writers don’t care anymore. AND IM NOT SAYING THATS THE CASE HERE! I’ve never met the writers of Boom I don’t know their thoughts and lives on the matter and I’m not gonna pretend I do! But it feels like it while watching some parts yk? Honestly I have a similar frustration with Teen Titans Go (which both are CN shows so makes me wonder tbh…) where they constantly make fun of the OG show and the fans viciously it’s just down right rude. Tho obvi Boom is nowhere NEAR as bad of this as TTG, I was just pulling that out as a clearer example. Honestly it isn’t even THAT prominent but it was something I picked up on. Especially when Sonic is one of those “cringey” franchises, it feels like they were trying to hop on a trend to try n be funny but idk didn’t hit with me but that’s just my opinion!

My second issue is actually more pointed towards the games. Now take this with a grain of salt as my digging into the Boom games is currently surface level at best. I’ve yet to play/watch fully through any of the games (of which I believe there’s three iirc) all I’ve seen is some beginning clips of Rise of Lyric and word of mouth from other fans. However, it does feel as though these games were handled rather poorly. The glitches are INSANE it almost feels like no one went through to try and clean stuff up?? Also these games all came out in like November and December with the last coming out in I believe September so it honestly kinda feels like they got rushed out for Christmas? Obviously this is only speculation and I have no proof or even much evidence to the idea. So anyone reading this don’t go screaming it like it’s fact. Though, from what I can tell, it’s nowhere NEAR as bad as, it does remind me of 06. Sonic 06 also came out in November and that game is NOTORIOUSLY bad for having horrible glitches that in many cases make the game down right unplayable. The actual plot and story of the game isn’t bad in fact I find 06 to be super interesting! However, it’s a videos game. And, arguably, playability is way more important than anything else. It should be your top priority yk? I’ve also heard similar issues with the new rerelease of Colors that came out last year. Came out in November. Has major bugs. It’s just. It feels like a very unfortunate pattern. However!!! I will say!!! Sonic Forces also came out in November but I’ve personally played through it myself and honestly I don’t think it’s badly bugged at all! It plays super well and is super fun!! So I have hopes for Sonic Frontiers which is also set to come out during the Holiday season (most likely also November). I really really think and hope that the franchise is making a turn for the better!!!!! I understand wanting to get the games out during a time they’re most likely to have really good sales but I do wish the actual quality wouldn’t suffer for it. (Again, this is all speculation. I could be mega wrong)

TL;DR Sonic Boom is definitely very different from the rest of the franchise but it’s fun, hilarious, and honestly kinda just really nice to see what they do with the series when they take it out of the context of the main stuff (Same with 2020!)

SEND ME “YOUR THOUGHTS ON _____” ASKS

[kiribaku-queen]

Head Canons: Jealous of their dance partner

Pairings: Akaashi x reader, Bokuto x reader, Kuroo x reader, Kenma x reader, Atsumu x reader, Oikawa x reader, Iwaizumi x reader

Fluff

A/N: So sorry that this is so late! I’ve never done headcanons before so i was really nervous to do these. I hope they meet your expectations! Some were really fun to do and others were a bit challenging because I didn’t want them to be similar to each other. I tried to keep each person’s unique. Also changed the prompt just a little! Maybe if this does well, I’ll do more headcanons? i’m not sure! Enjoy and happy reading!

Akaashi

Would be calm and collected on the outside but lets be honest, he’d be RAGING on the inside

I don’t know why, but his s/o doing ballet

So when he picks you up from practice one day, he sneaks a peak at your upcoming showcase performance

But… who the hell is this guy next to you?

And why is he touching your waist like that?!

Akaashi would be standing by the doorway, with his hands crossed, eyebrow twitching in annoyance

When practice is over, you skip into his arms

Of course you earn a loving smile in return but when your partner passes, best believe this boy is glaring at said man

Performance day comes and I can just imagine him snatching the best seats in house with a bouquet of your favorite flowers in hand

When you come on stage, you have his full attention

His eyes are shimmering with admiration and pride for you

But is quickly replaced with a scowl when he sees your partner

Cue twitching eyebrow

But OOF does this performance require close contact and almost kissing

Wtf, Akaashi doesn’t remember this when he watched your practice?!

Despite how monotone his expression is all the time, you can tell when somethings bothering him

So when you greet him after your performance, you see it right away that hes bothered by something and you already know why

“baaaabe, you know its not like that! It’s only dancing, nothing more” you reassured him

And he knows that

But that doesn’t stop him from staring down your partner as he passes

Bokuto

You already KNOW this man gets jealous and he shows it

That sad puppy face, those droopy eyes, and his deflated hair

Its cute but also sad at the same time

He wouldn’t know about your routine until the day of the performance because he wanted to be surprised

But as soon as he saw how close you and your partner had to be

His smile went from 😊 to 😐in a split second

I can already hear his friends laughing at him in the background

What’s even worse to him

Its not even that your close to your partner

Nope

It’s the fact that you look like your enjoying it

Hes squinting hard because did he see that right?

Hes so deep in his jealousy that he doesn’t even realize that youre only doing it to look believable to save your grade

You all know those type of teachers

When youre done with your performance, you go to find your boyfriend in the sea of people

You cant help but stifle a chuckle when you see his looking down

Youre fixing his hair, as one would do

But as soon as your dance partner comes into view, hes pulling you into his arms and you best believe you are staying there

Hes wants to make it crystal clear that you are taken

Youd have to spend the rest of the day cheering him up because his mind always goes back to your routine

Kuroo

Ahhhh this man

I am in love with this man

This man is the most supportive boyfriend

Right when you get on stage, he is screaming and I mean S C R E A M I N G your name

Everyone in the audience looks at him like

Who the fuck invited this man

He is so hype during your performance and is so proud of how much you improved throughout the semester

Everything is fine and dandy until he sees your dance partner pull you close to him and your faces almost touch

His heart dropped to his stomach

Like ouch

He wasn’t expecting that

hes the only one that’s allowed to have you that close but seeing that someone else that he doesn’t even know if basically flirting with you on stage in front of everyone has him seething

and he goes through the different stages of denial

the initial denial

like was that really you or did he mix you up with some other dancer

then hes basically ripping his hair out

and finally just sits there like, what is life?

Hes sulky, almost like Bokuto

Youre waiting for him to come pick you up but Kuroo takes a little detour to the mens dressing room

Remember that scene where Kuroo gets upset that they insulted his height and there was fire in the background?

Same energy

Hes letting your dance partner know that he is your boyfriend and if he ever touches you like that again, the only he’ll be touching is the ground when he crumbles him to pieces

And he’s bragging at how much of a better dance he is and could replace him as your dance partner if he really wanted to

…He cant fucking dance…

Empty threats but your dance partner doesn’t know that

He’s trembling in his shoes when Kuroo goes to congratulate you

Then its back home and he showing you who you belong to *wink wink*

Kenma

It takes a lot for you to get Kenma to come out to your debut showcase

Dancing isn’t his thing, but really, what is?

Your heart flutters as you peak behind the curtain and you see Kenma, all dressed up with a single flower in his hands, sitting straight dab in the middle

Of course Kuroo is with him because he needs someone to help him get out of his comfort zone

Kenma isn’t too impressed with the performance so far (only because you haven’t shown up yet)

When you do appear on stage, he is absolutely mesmerized

He never knew you could dance so well. If he knew, maybe he’d sneak at you more often

The moment male counterparts entered the stage, he already knew this something was fishy

In his mind, thoughts are racing 100000000x a second

Are they just backup dancers?

Why are they coming towards you?

Are you going to dance with them?

Who is that guy?

And as soon as one of the guys brings you close to him, Kenma is as stiff as a board

You know how a cat is when they get scared? That’s Kenma in his seat

Kuroo notices it right away and smirks

This is the first time he’s seen Kenma feel jealous, or feel any other emotion

When you ask Kenma what he thought of the performance, he was shy at first

Like, you did good. You were very pretty

Although small, you appreciated his compliments because it was hard to get them out of him

He’s shy at first, but then he’s quick to give his judgements about your dance partner

As if he couldn’t stop, he was complaining all night long that there should never be a man that close to you that’s not him

Atsumu

Not the jealous type

Sorry, but I just don’t see it

But you know what I do see?

That he likes to show you off

He’ll go to all of your dance practices and all of your performances because we love a supportive boyfriend

Even when he has volleyball practices, he’s going straight to your practice right after

And lets be honest, hes looking at your ass more than he is watching out for other guys

Hes confident about your relationship and that you wont leave him

Hes in the crowd screaming like Kuroo

YEAH THAT’S MY BABY!

THAT’S MY GIRLFRIEND WITH THE BIG ASS

Omg how embarrassing!!!!

Gosh, you could hear him from the stage and it took everything in your power to not laugh

After the show, you jump into his arms because awwww!

Hes complimenting the dance and how well you did

Hes giving out all these compliments to your other dance mates

But when it came to your male dance partner

He literally shoves his face out of the way like hes not even there

Like his massive hand just covers his entire face and is like nope, you’re not even there to me

Fine maybe he is a little jealous

Oikawa

Being the jealous type, he already knew everything about this little duet you were doing

Who your partner was

What class they were in

Does this person have a partner?

When were you were having practice?

Who else was going to be there? Because he sure as hell will make sure he’s there if its just you two

How close were you two getting?

Only because he forced you to tell him

He’s monitored your dance so well that he’s sure he could copy it

No he cant  

Yeah it’s a little much, but hes the protective type! Hes just making sure that you’re safe and that your partner doesn’t try anything on you

But no matter how many times hes seen the dance

No matter how many times he knows that it means nothing

And no matter how much he braces himself for that part

A part of his stomach just tenses up

Its frustrating to see his s/o be that close to someone who isn’t him. And he cant help but be jealous, who wouldn’t?

Your expression, your dance moves, the emotion you put into the dance – they were all so convincing. If no one knew you had a boyfriend, they would all think that you and your dance partner would be dating

He cant have that

After the showcase, he makes it really known that you are already taken

Given his extra ass, he’d be exaggerating soooo much and youd just roll your eyes at him

Iwaizumi

Jokes on you, he IS your dance partner

Yeah, he’s got other hobbies other than volleyball

And don’t’ judge! Dance is good for flexibility

Anyway

If your team needs any couple dances, its you and Iwa-chan

Buuuuut

There are times when your team separates you two

And when that happens, best BELIEVE he’s keeping an eye out

During practice, he’s always side glancing and huffs whenever you two laugh together

When your dance teacher suggests you and your partner do something a little sexual, Iwa sit here to immediately stop it

If you had to do anything of the sorts, you were doing it with him

NO IFS OR BUTS

Your teacher wouldn’t be too happy that he is ruining their vision

But he promises that you two will practice extra hard for those parts to make it perfect

Gulp

[inosukeslefttoe]

SO i just finished wonder egg priority and i think that with confidence i can say it has been one of my favorite animes like... ever ?? and not even from hyperfixation or obsession over it just... its so fucking real yet so simple in a way that i havent rlly seen shown in any other shows you feel ??

but first i wanna talk about how sexy the art and animation is real quick... HOMIE ITS SO GOOD LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT JUST... serotonin... the characters are all so unique and iconic and fun but not over the top in their designs yknow ??? they seem like regular every day girls but they stand out and theyre all sO CUTE !!!! also i love how the style is like this soft bubbly slice of life lookin stuff with bright happy colors and the most beautiful scenes you could find but they also have the SICKEST fight scenes complete with whimsical animal helpers and terrifying villains and crazy weapons unique to each character. and the animation. god DAMN shawty i am obsessed with everything in this show. i might make a post solely about the art later lol bc i wanna get into the other stuff.

so the themes in the show right ?? it starts just as this cute lil magical girl kinda deal but within the first episode we see that like.. oh damn... thats kinda heavy... tbh i was a little shocked and thought about stopping bc yknow bad mental health BUT i was so intrigued that i had to keep going and i am SO GLAD that i did. because this show just so beautifully discusses all these heavy topics in such an eloquent and artistically expressive way. and also like, , the juxtaposition of the charming childlike vibe with bright colors and 14 yr old girl protagonists against the dark themes of suicide and so much else,, i think is just perfect. bc a lot of heavy animes are more of the seinen genre and have some middle aged dude as a protag or make the entire color palette dim or offer little relief to the pain of these heavy themes right ?? but NO not wonder egg bitches B) because these problems arent just things that ppl face later in life or just problems that need to be talked about among adults or the edgy seinen watching squad,, these are REAL problems that face people of every age, gender etc and i think its awesome that wonder egg addresses that. some may cringe at the thought of their high schooler watching animes that discuss sexual harassment, suicide, abuse, self harm, eating disorders etc,, but in reality it is the most comforting thing i have ever come across and is basically jsut free anime therapy. because not only does wonder egg present these themes to the viewers as something real that happens to all kinds of people (making said people feel heard in a way that maybe they hadnt before), but it also makes sure to vanquish all of these forms of trauma. and the way the trauma is vanquished isnt always beautiful and it isnt always just magically gone with a poof. the struggles of overcoming or living with that sort of thing are shown in such a real and relatable way that addresses every hardship trauma survivors have to go through. and i just. god i cry bro. 

oh m y GOD and the lgbtq+ rep in this show ?? like shawty... as soon as i saw episode one i was picking up on some gay/lesbian themes but then again im sapphic and project that a lot so i tend to see that sort of stuff like... everywhere... but NE WAYS... episode ten made me FUKCING CRY BRO LIke i cant believe there was a whole trans character with a whole trans pride hoodie like LKGHKDGH my heart is just so.. so fucking full thinking about him. bc like yeah i know there are trans characters in anime but i feel like theyre always very ambiguous about actually being trans or not or erased or portrayed as a harmful stereotype or theyre constantly misgendered and still refered to as their assigned gender at birth and i hate it. HOWEVEr... Kaoru.. *chefs kiss* it was so amazing to see a character straight up say “yeah im trans” in such a casual yet powerful way bc i personally have never seen that before. and i love love loved how he went into his backstory and talked to momoe about gender bc i think thats what she rlly needed and that it helped her find herself and it makes me so happy oh my god,, and the way they talked about it never seemed forced or like it was the focal point of his existence yknow ?? like yeah he existed to help momoe overcome some of her trauma but he also just existed to be HIM yknow ?? also... personally, i headcanon momoe as a trans girl even though i dont remember it being explicitly stated plus the school scenes of her and stuff would seem like they suggest otherwise ??but,,, SHAWTY THE AMOUNT OF SUBTEXT and her complicated relationship w gender is... something i feel like a cis girl would not go through so harshly yknow ?? with all of the questioning and feeling detached from femininity or feeling like ppl dont see her as an actual girl and only like her as a guy or for her masculine traits,,, but dont take my word on this bc i myself am a cis girl but that was just my take on it as someone in the lgbtq+ community trying to educate myself on the transgender community :) either way,, wonder eggs portrayal of momoe and kaoru and the way that momoe becomes so passionate about expressing herself the way she wants to as a girl is just... good lord im gonna cry its so perfect,,,.so ... i just love this show way too much. i also am honestly super lost about the relationship btwn acca and ura-acca ?? bc i was gonna mention ura-acca as a canonically gay guy bc when i was watching i interpreted ep 11 as him being in love with acca and being jealous of Azusa (bc i mean,, they lived together (i swear to god there was only one bed in that apartment) and had a daughter together and def loved each other and also when Frill said they were husbands and then when ura-acca said he wasnt attracted to azusa but he was def jealous of their relationship ??) but then i saw somewhere that theyre brothers ?? which would make sense ig since they look kinda similar and accas daughter called ura-acca “uncle”.. but at the same time its ANIME SO THEY ALL LOOK SIMILAR and referring to gay couples as siblings is an EXTREMELY common euphemism soooo... IM JUST LOST HERE... but yeah i tried doing research and found different things so i cant say anything for sure >:( however,,, if they are canonically a lil fruity for each other... when frill refered to acca as ura-accas husband i imploded dude you never hear that sort of wording in anime.. but if theyre related i am so sorry. 

god this is so much longer than i planned it to be oops but i also love the theme about like.. relying on friends to help carry your weight but at the same time not becoming completely dependent on those friends and using their support to learn how to love yourself and rely on yourself yknow ?? bc that is exactly what healthy friendships look like. bc i think ai sort of had a codependency thing goin on with koito maybe ?? but now she has a whole squad of funky friends that are so so different but all struggle with different kinds of trauma and although they fight over it, they always get through it with each other together. and they push each other no matter what to be the best versions of themselves and they teach other that getting hurt is okay because theyre always gonna be there to pick up the pieces no matter what happens. they can give each other space when they need and adapt to meet each others needs but theyre always able to balance it out with their own needs and thats such a beautiful thing in friendships especially at their age like damn i wish i had that maturity when i was 14 but no all i had was depression. another thing is that through these friendships you get to see all the different sides of each girl; you get to see them being strong or a shining light to their friends when theyre hurting but you also get to see them being hurt and weak and allowing themselves to be on the receiving end of the comfort. their friendships allows them to have weaknesses but it also allows them to highlight their strengths and thrive off of each others. I LOVE FRIENDSHIP DUDE

next i wanna briefly mention some of the themes connected to suicide that ive noticed. a big one is the survivors guilt that ai feels once koito is dead. several times she screams that she wishes she couldve gone with koito and she dreams of a “perfect world” where they committed a double suicide. one of the main reasons for her troubles is that she blames herself for koitos death and feels like it should be her thats dead... but at the same time she feels like too much of a coward to do anything now that koito is gone. she just has all these complex and contradicting feelings that wear away at her in ways that ppl that havent gone through the suicide of a loved one could never imagine. a lot of the times when things like this are portrayed in media i feel like its more in a way thats meant to guilt trip those that have taken their own lives and paint suicide as this selfish sin thats unforgivable but... not only does wonder egg reject that idea and instead portray it as a heartbreaking tragedy with,,, so so many terrible reasons, but it focuses on the feelings of ai separate from koito without blaming her in any way. not once did i feel like the show antagonized koito or that ai blamed koito for doing any of this, but they simply mourned her loss and touched on ais reaction towards the event but separate from koito herself if that makes sense. and i think that discussing survivors guilt without painting koito as the bad guy is something so beautifully done in wonder egg that can really resonate with those that have lost a loved one to suicide and have struggled with these same things.

okay i think this is the last thing ill mention,,, but HOMIE THE PARALLEL UNIVERSE BIT AT THE END. I AM. OBSESSED. i am such a whore for anything about the multiverse okay n e ways...,, not only did this make a super epic trippy ending of season one and add a little bit more magical girl whimsy to the show,, but it had such a powerful message. from the perspective of og ai,, finding out that you killed yourself in another world is... i mean its definitely not a surprise but at the same time it rlly makes you think how close og ai herself couldve been to that point and what decisions led her out of that dark place in her life. if i were in her shoes i would be terrified and id cry bc the thought of going back to such a dark place and actually going through with something like that is my worst fear and probably something that ai fears too. but at the same time,,, think from the perspective of ai two !!! like yeah its true that theres this awful terrible version of ai that dies but theres also a whole version of ai that is a superhero magical girl fighting off monsters to save countless ppls lives !! and she has a badass lizard and a gang of awesome friends !!! at first i was worried that ai two would be jealous of og ai and compare herself to her and feel inferior but like.. THEYRE LITERALLY THE SAME PERSON AND CAPABLE OF THE SAME THINGS !!! and ai two realized that !! just within the span of one episode, she went from the version of ai who took her life,, to the version of ai jumping in front of a friend to take a bullet for them and save their life. and that just inspired THE SHIT OUT OF ME. i think that ai was sent another version of herself to sort of beat her own worst enemy yknow ?? those doubts and fears that shes no good or that shes that same bystander from episode one and that she hasnt changed at all. but getting to interact with her parallel self and see her grow was just what she needed to realize that while yeah sometimes the worst thing can happen and things can be terrible but on the other hand sometimes the most wonderful thing imaginable can happen because she has the power to do either. 

so im gonna go ahead and stop rambling bc i got all my thoughts out that i wanted to for this post :D but yeah lol i might make another if i feel like it sometime. long story short: this show is perfect and it is going on my favorite of all times.

[chronicas]

this is your invitation to talk about ratchet and clank. i wanna hear everything you have to say about rift apart

ITS SO FUCKING GOOOOOOOD!!! PREPARE FOR THE LONGEST ASK OF ALL TIME!!!!

[also heads up for everyone this WILL contain rift apart spoilers but i’ll try and keep ‘em minimal.]

FUCK okay so firstly i am so sad about jim ward not returning as qwark in this one, he was irreplaceable :( i hope he’s doing alright.

the first thing about the game i enjoyed was the jabs at how long it’s been. i mean, it’s only been five years since the 2016 game but into the nexus was the last mainline game continuity wise.

now i shall get into the mechanics. i fucking ADORE them! the way they’ve incorporated the rifts is probably one of my new favorite mechanics second to only the hoverboots. AND the adaptive triggers on the dualsense are SO fucking cool and i love how they’ve utilized them in rift apart. the way the weapons handle feels amazing. the ONLY downside is i can’t use classic controls which i’m so used to it keeps throwing me off, but i’ll manage. and the DODGE mechanic?? man, ratchet and clank is pretty much the only franchise to ever get me to dodge and that’s because they always make it soooo fun to use, now that there’s a LITERAL dodge button i’m fucking ecstatic!! the wall running too!!!! so fucking fun. they’ve really made traversing the world insanely fun in this game.

then we move onto the weapons. a lot of new ones!! i’m still kinda hoping for some returning weapons but i’m really enjoying the new ones so far!! LOVE the one that’s essentially chaos reach in d2 (insomniac you shouldn’t have! MY main destiny subclass? aww <3) fucking love giant lasers. i can’t WAIT to see what happens when i level up these bad boys more. also WHERE is my zurkon? i NEED it! i’m dying over here.

AND RIVET. i love her so fucking much, she’s totally nuts, just like ratchet, but she’s also so distinctly different from him. i haven’t had much of her interactions with clank yet but so far i love their dynamic. it’s very different from the best-pal duo that ratchet and clank have, but it’s got it’s own charm. i’m really looking forward to learning more about her both personality wise and backstory (GIRL HOW DID YOU LOSE THAT ARM?!? 👀). ALSO SHE HAS A FUCKING HAMMER!!! GIRL DESTROY!!!!!! GIRL MAIM!!!! but i’m really curious about her. like why is she ALSO the only lombax in her dimension? what kind of adventures has she gotten into in the past? (psst hey insomniac btw it’d be a REALLY good move to do a rivet spinoff… pretty please?). so much mystery around this gal, i adore her.

nefarious is nefarious which is fucking epic as always but i HATE the lack of lawrence >:( nefarious is awesome and hilarious but he needs a straightman to bounce off of. it was the primary reason i didn’t really like his portrayal in the movie and 2016 game (also bc DREK is supposed to be the main antagonist in that!!) and i worry he won’t hold up as well in this game also, but i don’t think i’m in too deep yet (i only JUST beat the fist level as rivet on sargasso) maybe i’ll be proven wrong!!

as for the titular boys themselves.. i’m worried about them :( why separate them :(((( i KNOW it’s for good plot reasons but i’m STILL sad about it. i’m SUPPOSED to be sad about it AND I AM!!!

i’m very curious about what’s going on with the clank levels, they’ve referenced crack in time once already and i’m high key holding out for more zoni lore but i’m not getting my hopes up too high. but maybe just because they feel so similar to the crack in time levels mechanically i’m just reading too far into it. i like the cool space guy.. guess they’re all space guys. BUT this lizard dude. he’s cool, he reminds me of sigmund with how he helps clank out and stuff :)

ratchet i’m worried about. my poor boy had to deal with losing clank once. he doesn’t need that kinda pressure again :( also i’m very curious about what’s going on in his head. especially with how he reacted to the dimensionator at the beginning. i have my own thoughts and theories but i’ll wait until i get further in to see. my main thought on it right now is maybe he just doesn’t really care about finding the lombaxes anymore? i mean i doubt azimuth really left a good taste in his mouth after LITERALLY trying to kill him (and in one case ACTUALLY killed him, but only clank was there for that). loved alister as a character but he really DID suck a lot. again. i’ll have to wait and see! worried about ratchet tho. i want him and rivet to be friends 🥺

all in all. insanely good game. might become my favorite in the franchise!! i thought crack in time would be hard to beat but this game is fucking AMAZING!!

[thr-333]

Mismatch- Part 18

Bio Dad Bruce Wayne Month 2020

Irony! My old friend! You having been so glaringly obvious for so long!

First < Previous > Next

--------

Bruce stares blankly at the report in front of him, an alert pops up on the Bat-computer. Joker is attacking somewhere downtown. He tries to convince himself to get his gear, when seconds later Red Hood pops up in the area.

“Jason can handle it,” He mutters to himself, but pulls up the live feed anyway.

He had thought with Selina it would be different. That if they had children they would raise them together. Have some semblance of a normal family. Little did he know that they could have already had that.

He feels cold rage wash through him, so focuses on the screen in front. There's the Joker standing with a masked figure. For a fearful second he thinks it's Songbird. But no the costume isn’t right, more his style then Songbirds.

Is there another vigilante?! He thinks, looking over to the alert feeding in new information automatically. No it’s a meet and greet for MDC and MCD. Joker just couldn't wait for the concert then.

It’s not that he doesn't see Selina’s point. To have them be involved in things like this would be terrifying. He already puts his children in danger. He had already lost Jason. What if I mess this up too.

The  Joker is now in an elevator talking to the boy who clearly isn’t listening. In fact he’s suspiciously calm for being held at gunpoint. He’ll have to look into it. Then the camera falls and the screen goes to black, he switches to the news feed but they won’t have anything for a while yet. Hacking into the security cameras doesn't even cross preoccupied his mind.

Technically he has already put them in danger. They’ve been nothing but stalked and attacked since arriving in Gotham. All because a rumour that their his children, he couldn't imagine the danger they would be in if everyone found out it was true. The rest of his kids could handle themselves, they were trained to,  but even Barbra…

Perhaps it was best if he stayed out of their lives.

“Is everything alright Master Bruce?” Alfred breaks him out of his spiral.

“Yes, Alfred everything is fine,” Bruce sits up straight, as if that was proof.

“Really, because you seemed to have not noticed that young man has been thrown off the roof,”

“What!” He turns back to the screen to see the boy in free fall, he moves to take action a split second before Jason swoops in to catch them.

Bruce sags back into his chair. He shouldn't have been so distracted. He could have helped before, now he’s likely scarred for life. Literally if he knows the Joker.

“Something appears to be on your mind Master Bruce,” Alfred repeats, pouring the tea.

“Some new information has come to light,” Bruce dances around the subject, “Selina has been hiding something very important,”

“Well I should hope you are referring to the twins and not some worthless jewel,”

“What!” Bruce chokes on the tea he was drinking, “How did you know?”

“Master Bruce, you are meant to be the detective out of the two of us,” Alfred passes him a napkin, refilling his cup.

“So in other words you're not going to tell me,” Bruce sighs, running his hand through his hair.

“Let’s just say you have similarities that are hard to miss,” Bruce doesn't look up, “Perhaps too similar is some aspects,”

It is said in such a way Bruce is sure Alfred somehow read his thoughts.

“I can’t bring them into this life,” Bruce rests his head in his hands.

“What's the difference between them and everyone else who runs through the city?” Alfred slides the tea cup closer, in his constant mission to get him to drink more tea than coffee.

“They're happy , happy without me,” Bruce takes the cup, leaning back in his seat.

“You asked them this?” Alfred challenges, clearly setting up a trap to pull him into another lecture.

“No,” Bruce answers, too tired to try and avoid the trap.

“Perhaps Master Bruce, you should try having a conversation rather than assuming you know what they want,” Bruce could be sure he practiced this speech before hand, “Instead of trying to justify reasons to push them away, you could actually try to get to know them,”

“I’ll only put them in danger, they’re better off without me,” It’s true, Selina was right all along, she should have never even told him.

“That might be the case before they knew you, however, do you really think they will want to live the rest of their lives without knowing you?” Selina did tell them didn’t she? how long had they known, had they ever wanted to even meet him? “Or perhaps a better question, would you like to spend the rest of your life not knowing them?”

“It would be selfish of me,” His selfishness never led to any good.

“It would be more selfish to deny them the chance because of what you think is best,” Alfred knows he’s right, as he takes the untouched cup from his hands, “I would certainly find it more selfish, having more rooms to clean that on one ever sleeps in,”

With that Alfred leaves, taking the tea set with him. He was right, as always. It would be better to ask them. He wasn't sure about setting up rooms just yet. He has a lot of explaining to do for everyone else.

“This is the worst thing that could of possibly happened,” Marion groans into the hotel bed.

“I know getting thrown off a building can be traumatic,” Marinette lets the Kwamis out of her backpack, knowing full well that's not what Marion was talking about.

“I don't care about that!” Marion sits up, glaring at her like she was mad, “My crush watched an embarrassing video of me and now he knows I like him!”

“Oh the horror,” Marinette opens the closet which she had set up as a little room for Tikki.

“Imagine if it was Adrien,” Marion spits, glaring up through the pillows

“Oh I would die,” Marinette answers honestly, closing the door giving the Kwamis an opportunity to avoid Marion’s sulking,  “But you would also be making fun of me, so…”

“Yeah you’re right,” He flops down on the bed, “Ugh just kill me,”

“As much as I would like a room to myself, I would prefer it not to be a jail cell,” Marinette comes to sit down on the edge of the bed.

“Like you don’t have ways to make a body disappear,” Marion mutters into the covers, but Marinette has practice at deciphering the muffled gibberish.

“Mari, if I did we wouldn’t have to deal with Lila anymore,” Technically she has had many opportunities to get rid of Lila, but Marion needs some humour.

“I would rather deal with Lila than this,” Marion mutters, and Marinette immediately calls bullshit.

“Really?” Nothing is worse than having to deal with Lila, not even Hawkmoth.

“... no,” And especially not a little embarrassment.

“Exactly, so it can’t be that bad,” She shifts onto the bed more firmly.

“Are sure I can’t use your miraculous,” Marion turns to look at her pleadingly, “I could use some good luck,”

“You think your babydoll eyes work on me?” Marinette raises an eyebrow.

“It’s worth a try,” He flops back down, before shooting back up, “Hey! What if I used the Rabbit miraculous!”

“What!” Marinette yells, almost slipping off the bed.

“I could go back and make sure the meet and greet isn’t attacked!” He has a sparkle in his eye that tells Marinette he thinks its a wonderful idea.

“That wouldn’t change the fact he knows,” She tries to shut it down before he gets too-more excited.

“Your right I should go back and stop the interview!” Marion leaps up, reaching for the bag.

“No!” Marinette wrestles him down, trying to stop him from getting to the miracle box.

As they fight, not as seriously as they could but still using super strength, they fall off the bed with a yelp. This is of course when a portal opens at the end of the bed.

“Bunnix!” Marinette yells, still holding Marion in a choke hold, even if he is now frozen.

“This should really go without saying but please do not use the miraculous to go back in time to stop embarrassing yourself in front of your crush,” Bunnix steps out of the portal, fixing Marion with a hard stare.

“See you say it like that and it does nothing to convince me,” Marion tries to break out of her hold.

“Wait, would it really mess up the future?” Marinette keeps her hold on Marion.

“You have no idea,” Bunnix says seriously, with a sigh Marion relaxes and Marinette lets him go.

“Soooo, how are you?” Marion asks, after a long awkward pause.

“Now or in the future?” Bunnix has a flash of playfulness in her eye, that has them both relaxing.

“Well you are here now so it would technically be now anyway,” Marinette mutters, climbing back onto the bed, “… wait not supposed to know anything about the future right?”

“You got it,” Bunnix gives her finger guns with a wink.

“I really feel like I don’t,” She sighs, sinking into the bed.

“Well how are you now then, you don’t really talk to us much anymore,” Marion asks, still sitting on the floor quite comfortably, “Or anyone for that matter,”

“Sorry I’m going through a bit of a; I’m going to be Bunnix I’m better than all of you, phase,” Future Alix explains, leaning against the wall, “Don’t worry I’ll get over it,”

“Is there anything we can do?” Marinette still feels concern for her friend that has pulled away from everyone.

“Just keep being yourselves,” Bunnix smiles, adding mysteriously, “all of them,”

“Right, you know about the identity madness,” Marinette falls back onto the bed.

“You have no idea,” Bunnix repeats, smirking.

“Alright that's getting frustrating,” Marion huffs, crossing his arms.

“Don’t worry you’ll find out in time,” Bunnix ruffles his hair, not that it makes much difference he hasn't fixed it since getting thrown of the roof, “That reminds me, there is a message from the future I’m allowed to give you, here,”

“What’s this?” Marion takes the scrap of paper from her, Marinette standing.

“You’ll-”

“I’ll find out,” Marion interrupts, getting another smirk, “got it,”

Bunnix doesn't say anything more, walking back through the portal with a salute. Marion stands up unfurling the note. Marinette reads over his shoulder.

Sorry for being a jerk ♡

“... What's this supposed to mean?” Marion looks to her for answers.

“No idea,” She sits back on the bed, having hoped it would be some key to Hawkmoth's identity.

“Maybe it's your convoluted way of apologising for stealing the top bunk,” Marion grins sitting next to her, “Knew you would regret it one day,”

“I did not steal the top bunk,” She swats half heartedly at him, as he easily dodges “I won that game fair and square,”

“I doubt it,” Marion goes to fold up the note.

“So be it,” Marinette takes the note reading over it again.

“... So I can’t travel back in time,” Marion lies back in the bed.

“You shouldn't travel back in time,” Marinette scolds, still not making sense of the note.

“Let me just point out that since Bunnix showed up there is an alternate timeline where you let me do it,” Marion’s dangling legs kick at her slightly.

“What on earth was I thinking?” She folds up the note into a heart, partly to see if it revealed some hidden message, why else would there be a heart?

“Oh my poor, dear brother, if only there was some way I could lessen his suffering,” Marion recites theatrically, in a terrible impression of her.

“Careful now, I can always learn how to hide a body,” She warns, waiting for the note to do something, it doesn't.

She keeps trying to decipher the note. Starting a mental countdown for when Marion explodes.

“Nette! What am I supposed to do!” Right on time, “The worst possible thing happened, he found out I like him,”

“Isn’t that the best thing?” Marinette asks absentmindedly, reaching for her backpack holding the miracle box.

“No it’s the worst,” Marion pouts, falling back on the bed.

“Ok, think of it this way,” She tucks the note into a side compartment of the miracle box, “Is this the most embarrassing thing that could possibly happen?”

“Surprisingly, not helping ,” Marion glares, she just glares back, “Yes, yes it is,”

“Then you can’t possibly embarrass yourself more,” He would probably prove her wrong, but that's besides the point

“So what your saying is...” Marion trails off, getting lost in his thoughts.

“-Go for it,” She finishes.

“Hmm, not a bad idea,” Marion hums, swinging to sit back up.

“Of course not, it’s mine,” She tucks the miracle box safely away, planning to come back to the note later.

“Maybe I should tell Adrien you like him,” Marinette whips around to see his cheekily grin.

“Don't you dare!” She pounces, trying to pull him into another choke hold, “I won't even bother hiding the body!”

“I am such a jerk!” Jason says, yet again, and Roy is so close to just leaving him to talk himself in circles, “I just left , he probably thought I was mad about it!”

“The biggest jerk in history,” He agrees, fiddling with the dial of his newest project.

“ Roy ,”

“Sorry, is this not the ‘agree with everything I say’ kind of rant?” He doesn't bother to look up, he knows Jason is pacing around the living room, he has been for the last hour.

“No, you know those are mainly reserved for Bruce,” Jason says absentmindedly,  Roy can feel him passing behind him.

“Right, right,” Roy waves him off, with blowtorch in hand, “But Jason we’ve been over this ten times already,”

“What if he decided he doesn't like me since the interview?”

“Oh I see it's actually the ‘ignore Roy’ kind of rant, got it,” He sighs, welding two pieces of metal together.

“What if he doesn't like me because of this ,”

“Then it would be the absolute worst job of flirting I have ever seen,” And he’s seen and tried some pretty bad tactics, “Really takes a special talent for someone to actually like you and to just completely shoot yourself in the foot,”

“I need to explain,” Jason decides, likely not hearing a word he just said.

“You’re going to go up to him in full gear and awkwardly explain that you suck at flirting,” Yeah that rarely worked well on civilians.

“What else am I meant to do?” Oh so he is listening.

“I don’t know, get to know him better?” Roy shrugs, a piece falling off his contraption, “Apologise when you aren't going to scare him off,”

“And how am I meant to get to know him better Roy? next time his life is threatened?” Roy shrugs ‘why not’ as he tries to fit the piece back on, “Hey I know were getting shot at but I just wanted to ask you favourite color,”

“Red, probably,” Roy guesses, the piece falling off again.

“ Roy ,” This time he does look up, but doesn't dare mention to Jason he is blushing the same shade, “How am I supposed to get to know him, it's not like we have any other connection,”

“Easy just figure out his secret identity,” Roy knows he can do it, hell he could probably do it.

“I’m not going to do that,” Jason sighs, sitting down on the couch with noticeably less scorch marks.

“Alright then, suffer,” Roy shrugs, finally getting the piece in place.

“...I need to apologise,” Jason decides, adding “Today,”

“Ugh, you're going to find some overly convoluted bat-like-way of apologising aren't you,” The piece comes loose a little bit and Roy decides it's not that important anyway.

“Probably,”

“Was this really the best way you could think of apologising?” Marion asks, he had found a note hidden away in the miracle box a while back, it having finally clicked who sent it.

“You kept my note,” Jason smiles looking up from the book he was reading.

“Of course I did, I have to send it back to past me didn't I?” Marion sits next to Jason, careful of his bruised side.

“I wrote that a while ago, looks the exact same,” Jason puts down the book and picks up the note.

“It’s time travel, I’m not taking any chances,” Nope, Marion had learnt his lesson about that a long time ago.

“Of course,” Jason smirks, leaning in closer, “So that's the only reason you kept the note?”

“Well,” They had kept it to see if it was some key to Hawkmoth's identity, which seems kind of ridiculous now but they had been grasping at threads, “I did think it was pretty cute, once I knew it was you,”

He wasn't about to admit how long it took to figure out. Then again Marion didn’t think he felt the same way. He looks over to Jason, how wrong he was

“How was it not obvious it was me?” Jason asks, a little teasingly, “I added a heart,”

“Yeah that kind of confused me,” Marion frowns, turning the note over in his hand.

“What? I wanted to make it obvious I was flirting,” Jason wraps an arm around him, Marion quickly turning to him.

“That was flirting?!”

“You didn’t know?!”

------------------------

Taglist:

@blackmagicforever @zeneralla @technicallyburninggarden @fusser90  @misslenamooney @superbwhispersconnoisseur @biodad-bruce-month @nalu-ismyjam @the-one-woman-army @rosesandsailboats

[charlthotte]

Breaking Through the Iron Wall - Aone Takanobu x Reader

Chapter 7

While sitting at the table eating breakfast, my father practically sprinted down the stairs to greet me with a cheery smile plastered upon his face like usual. He quickly engaged me in conversation, "Soooo... About that Aone guy... You seem pretty close to have only known each other for a few days. Might there be something between you?"

I had half the mind to face plant into my plate of food, "No, Dad.” I replied unenthusiastically, rubbing my browbone.

"Then why were you walking home together?" He cupped his hands in his face playfully, taking part in the typical annoying parent trope.

"You know how I'm the manager of the boys' volleyball club?"

"Yes..." He cooed in a sing-song voice.

"Well, Aone's just a member of it." I stated, bored of his prying behaviour.

"Just? Alright then..."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I raised my eyebrow, genuinely puzzled.

"I just know my child..." He declared, completely dodging the question. I scrunched my face in confusion, but not bothering to probe him any further.

It wasn't long until my train set off, so I waved my father goodbye - my mother nowhere to be seen - as always. The sun lightly shone through the clouds, a beautiful contrast to the day before. And of course, when I entered the train carriage - Aone was situated in the very same seat as the two previous days; and once again I sat next to him. Unfortunately, I never harboured any doubts that he wouldn't be by himself, the fact of that was a little disheartening - but, I guessed that people here were always pretty quick to judge a person. "So Aone, are you feeling any better than yesterday?" And as always, he met my question with a swift nod. But what followed that was perhaps the most unexpected thing I had heard in quite a while. A sneeze. But not just any sneeze, it was so high pitched and just delicate - it was a shock to hear it coming out of his mouth. I almost reacted with an 'awe' but stopped myself before. It probably would have been a little embarrassing for him if I did. "Ah, so you caught a cold? I'm sorry, you didn't have to stay with me yesterday." He closed his eyes then shook his head, as if to say 'it's all fine'.

I couldn't think of anything else to say, so I fumbled around in my bag for my book. The black-eyed susan was the subject of my present page. Although its core meaning was justice, it could be given in two very different scenarios. The first was if long awaited justice had finally been awarded to you - the flower was congratulatory. However, it could also be given as a condolence, for example if the justice system had wronged you or you or one of your loved ones were in need of the sweet glory of justice. The base meaning was still justice, but how the little branches of its subliminal meaning could bend was just fascinating. But no matter what, giving that flower to someone always signified injustice being present in the first place.

As always, I made sure to turn the pages slowly so Aone could read alongside me - side by side in silence. However, the train ride felt to have flown by in a matter of minutes and we were soon on our way to school, relishing the cool air lapping at our faces, not a single word was spoke between us at that time but it still felt like we hadn't stopped talking ever since I stepped onto the train. Maybe to an outside perspective, we would have seemed to be ignoring each other. It was anything but that, it could be described as something similar to telepathy - but without the communication.

-

Everything before lunch break rolled by pretty smoothly, it was fair to say there wasn't even a single little mishap. When I sat at a bench by myself, I felt a familiar overwhelming presence making their way towards me. "Hey, (Y/N)!" Hiroko squealed, as much a ball of energy as always.

"Hey Hiroko, you okay?" I asked, at a much lower energy output to her.

"I'm doing amazing! How are you doing?" She bounded around the ground, not caring about the eyes she brought our way.

"I'm fine I guess. By the way - where's Rea?"

"Rea! She got pulled away to talk to the teacher at the end of the lesson! She's so cool and pretty isn't she?!" Hiroko chortled, her eyes filled to the brim with child-like excitement.

"Sure she is." Normally I would be slightly agitated by a person exuding her level of energy, but something about her was just somehow... enthralling. Maybe it was her free spirited-ness, or something else entirely...

"(Y/N)! How's the volleyball club going? Did you decide to join? If so, what's everyone like?" Hiroko bombarded me with questions, I was unsure of which to answer first.

"Yeah, I joined and its good, I guess."

"Wait! That's so amazing! You're so cool! What are the players like?" It amazed me how she was even at high school, yet alone her second year.

"Oh, they play really well - I can really see where they got the iron wall nickname from. It's actually quite fun watching them play."

"No, silly! I meant the people, what are they like out of the court?!" She laughed at my mistake, but in an innocent manner, not a condescending one.

"The captain seems like a good guy. Their number six is... I don't think he's even human, and not in a good way. Aone doesn't speak much but I guess I know him the most - if that makes sense. And I don't really know the rest of the team very well yet."

"Huh?" She titled her head to the side, "How do you know him the most if he doesn't speak?"

"I guess communication is more than just conversation." I don't know why that came out of me, it wasn't a thought I had been pondering on at all - I guess it was just my thoughts from somewhere coming into the outside world.

"That sounds a bit weird." She snickered, uttering a childish giggle.

As I tried to eat my lunch - undisturbed - Hiroko still carried on bombarding me with questions about random facts about how cool Rea was. Their friendship was sort of peculiar to me - Hiroko was a firecracker, never afraid of people's thoughts nor was she afraid to express herself fully. On the other hand, Rea was much more reserved - from what I could tell. She didn't ever seem like she had any passion for anything either. It seemed as if Rea was just dragging her feet behind Hiroko whilst following her, however - from what I could sense, it was Hiroko who was the puppy walking behind Rea - looking up to her as if she was a big sister figure.

The rest of the day went by as smoothly as it could. After all, I had social studies - the feared class where I sat next to the grimace. However, he didn't try to provoke me once - which was very strange - instead, he sat his arms folded and expression blank, a rare but pleasant sight to see. I couldn't complain, even if his silence was a extremely strange occurrence.

But after school had ended, he sneakily snaked his arm around my shoulders, "So your highness... I heard you went to Aone's house last night - do you mind explaining?"

"For god's sake, Futakuchi. My Dad and I just dropped him off at his house." I tried to push his arms away from me, but he only clung onto me tighter, "Could you kindly let go of me?"

His arm returned to his side, only for him to bow with his arm flourished to the side once again, "Of course your highness, but I do have one other question..."

"What would that be?" I spoke through gritted teeth, trying not to smack him in his smug little face.

"May I inquire as to why you too were together in the first place?"

"I don't have to tell you anything, Futakuchi." Once again, I tried to up my pace to escape his leering sneer, but it just kept clambering onto my steps.

"My, my, my - your highness... That sounds highly suspicious." He snickered into my ear, my body began slightly shivering with rage.

Suddenly, a huge shadow loomed over the both of us - and of course it was the snowy mountain himself, Aone. As if on cue, Futakuchi began to scuttle away with his tail between his legs, it was simply a heart-warming sight. I mouthed a quick 'thank you' to Aone as I too, shuffled away - in order to get the bibs to hand out. Last night, someone must have left them to dry on the viewing deck. And they were right there. Climbing up the ladder was no problem, nor was climbing back down - though I must admit, with the bibs, it was slightly more difficult than before. I then proceeded to hand them out to their respective players. However, as I was handing the last bib to the libero, a rouge volleyball just started flying through the air as if it had been spiked.

But spiked directly at my face...

[tsuki-sennin]

Mina-san, bonne lecture~! (Tsuki recaps his feelings about Kamen Rider Saber, a personal essay.)

So, Saber... what a wild ride it's been, huh? Just a quick heads up, this is very long and rambling, and also contains spoilers for everything in Saber. It's fine if you don't wanna read all this, but I just wanted to get my thoughts out there.

TL:DR, Kamen Rider Saber's an undercooked hot mess I absolutely adore, warts and all.

Speaking as objectively as possible, it's a 6/10. Probably closer to a 5 than a 7... it's not great: All the different plot elements are cluttered and weirdly paced; character focus is disjointed and clearly biased toward certain characters, leaving great ones like Kento and Ogami, interesting ones like Kamijo and Hayato, and underdeveloped ones like Sophia and especially the Shindais in the dust; not to mention its balance of comedy and drama is off, and while both are very effective, there's a lot of mood whiplash that can take you out of the story. I also feel like a lot of the easily avoidable character conflict could've been easily resolved, even in universe, by simple conversations. Be careful Fukuda, I think Inoue might sue you if he finds out you've been biting his style and doing it worse.

Rider shows have a very frustrating tendency to drop cool form ideas and not do anything with them, and I don't think it's ever been more the case than with Saber. There's a similar argument to be made with the majority of Heisei Phase 2 after Gaim, but wow. The suits are expensive to make without just straight up recycling everything, I get that, but man, I really wanted to see more Wonder Rider forms. How come Touma got all the fun, eh? Of note are the Blades King of Arthur forms (which look amazing by the way), Espada's Jaaku Dragon forms (one of which I even drew last night), even the non-elemental random Wonder Ride Books all have awesome design elements that go tragically unused. Even if the other Swordsmen just kinda have the ones they do get to use slapped onto them, that's at least something. Touma also just straight up only uses Diago Speedy twice and never again. You have cool props guys, don't waste them like that!

Speaking of waste, Espada, goddamn. Since most of the Wonder Ride Books are Story Type and he needs one very specific Story Book to transform, he doesn't get much of... anything, really! No Wonder Rider forms like Blades, Lamp Do Cerberus being exclusive to Ganbarizing, only getting to use the Ride Gatriker like once, he even spends the second and third arcs as a completely different Rider, then once he comes back he doesn't get a King of Arthur-granted upgrade or even a Necrom Espada form. ...at least, not yet anyway. I'm holding out hope for Espada x Necrom and the eventual Saber V-Cinemas. Extra Rider stans, we will be well respected someday.

The Unreal Engine CGI used for fights in early Chapters was pretty good but wow it feels disconnected and they really drop it quick. I feel like if the animators had more freedom to use as many forms as they want, we'd have gotten a lot more mileage out of the books beyond... decoration basically. I actually really liked the CGI sequences, they felt creative and were fun to follow along with.

The soundtrack is pretty great on its own and conveys what it needs to, but they seriously overplay the orchestral themes. It honestly feels kind of... stock at times. I think my favorite parts of the score are when it winds down, since it feels a lot more natural and lets the cinematographers and actors speak for themselves.

As awesome as I think Falchion's design and the Mumeiken Kyomu are, The Phoenix Swordsman and the Book of Ruin comes up short as its own standalone thing. You'd think 30 or so minutes of non-stop action would be awesome, and it almost is? It's as good as a typical episode of the series with a higher action budget, but it kinda drags on a bit too long; and although I think Emotional Dragon looks cool, it feels a bit tacked on. Coming off of the incredible Zero-One REAL×TIME, it doesn't give you much room to breathe, which Rider films are typically great at handling. I also thought the resolution for the kid's subplot was kinda forced. He does an okay job at acting considering his age and doesn't overstay his welcome, but I really don't see how 20 minutes of violence and action is enough to convince him to be brave enough to go play with the other kids. 5/10, it's closer to a 4 than a 6 and I think that maybe Zero-One should've stood on its own if they really had to push back Kiramager Bee-Bop Dream because of the pandemic.

Alright, with all that said... As imperfect and undercooked Saber was, like Ghost I can consider it a personal favorite, 10/10. Call it a guilty pleasure if you want, but holy hell it's just the show I needed. Takuro Fukuda has a talent for creating fun, wonderful characters and utterly fascinating worldbuilding and concepts. It's a shame he doesn't utilize them fully, but hey!

The action and fight choreography are pretty top notch as usual. Lots of beautiful shot composition and set pieces, and plenty of great angles to help keep up with the extra busy action. I love watching the suit actors perform and they deserve all the respect in the world for their hard work in those hot, sweaty, and heavy costumes. Their visual design is also top notch, with lots of unique and fascinating forms and cool weapons I desperately want to play with despite being broke, all with spectacular finishers and hype jingles with the voice of Akio motherfucking Ohtsuka calling them out. A real feast for the eyes. Not a single bad suit among them, yeah I said it, fight me.

The crossover specials are soooo good too.

-I went over my feelings on the Zenkaiger crossover episodes in a separate post (good luck finding that btw), but to sum it up, they were great character moments for Zox and the Shindai siblings with lots of great screwball comedy and some good old fashioned meta humor.

-The Ghost crossovers are great little side stories all about how Daitenku Temple somehow had the Ghost Ijunroku Wonder Ride Book? I genuinely have no idea why it was there, or how Makoto had the Specter Gekikou Senki, and as far as I remember neither of their origins are explained. Did Luna or Tassel hand them off to them and told them to wait for a sword guy? And why do these generic French Revolution Gamma villains working for Danton get their asses handed to them so easily by Kanon, who literally just became a Rider? I thought that Makoto deciding to adopt all the Kanon clones into his family was both hilarious and adorable though; considering all the crap they went through, I think it was a good ending to this plot. Gimme Espada x Necrom already Toei/Bandai/Fukuda/whoever I need to yell at, give Kento things to do, I beg you.

-I haven't actually seen Super Hero Senki since it's not available for subbing yet, but apparently there's a Journey to the West plot starring the Taros and Ohma Zi-O and I want to see that so badly.

Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra? Yoohei Kawakami? A match made in heaven, that's what they are. All of their themes are absolute bangers. All of them. Almighty, Kamen Rider Saber, Sparks, Taju Rokou, all excellent and empowering pieces. Rewrite the Story, Will Save Us, and The Story Never Ends are all amazing inserts done by the cast, and it makes me wish we had even more of them to help break up the monotony of the score.

The characters are what easily make this show such a great watch though. For the most part, they have great personalities and chemistry, consistently fun and interesting scenes, well acted and... sometimes well-written development, and deeply investing personal stakes.

Narrating it all is the delightfully eccentric Tassel/Viktor, portrayed by Romanesque Ishitobi "TOBI" of the Paris-based Les Romanesques. I was utterly confused by his presence at first, wondering why there needed to be a narrator when the story would've been perfectly fine without it. He even got a special spot in the opening despite having no stake in the plot despite seeming to live in Wonderworld, who the hell is this guy? But then I thought "OH MY GOD, HE'S THE MAIN VILLAIN USING TOUMA AS THE HERO IN HIS OWN TWISTED STORY, THE BASTARD". I thought it'd be some subversion of expectations, true form, "That Was His Mistake!" shit. Trust me, it made a lot more sense in my head. I'm very happy that they didn't do that, as I grew to love having male Yuuka Kazami as my narrator, and when he was shown to be actually important by being friends with Yuri my mind was blown. And doubly so when I realized just how deeply necessary to the plot he really is.

Rintaro/Blades is up there as one of my all time favorite secondary Riders, since his curiosity is always consistently funny and adorable, his forms are all gorgeous and impressively designed, his relationships with Mei and Touma are absolutely sweet and compelling to see unfold, and his arcs about becoming willing to call out those he views as family and coming to terms with his feelings of inadequacy and both moving past and using them to strengthen himself are always great lessons to pass on to kids. ...even if they took like 10 goddamn episodes to be conveyed in what could've been 5, but hey, Takaya Yamaguchi does a stand-up job all throughout. Rider veteran Eitoku's refined, almost logical movements with the Suiseiken Nagare absolutely beautiful to see in action, and his final form having the same white and blue color scheme as Zooous's base form is an amazing touch I don't see appreciated enough.

Mei Sudo's also absolutely wonderful, serving as the perfect emotional core of the story, responsible for most of the funniest lines, sweetest character moments, and some of the most deceptively compelling drama. Asuka Kawazu brings the perfect energy for such a dynamic and well rounded character, and absolutely nails her scenes of quiet turmoil. As much as I would've loved her to become a Rider, I don't think she really needed to. She's already done so much to help, and as cool as it would've been to see her pick up a sword and fight alongside them as Espada, Calibur, or Falchion she's already endeared herself to me as one of my favorite supporting characters in the whole franchise.

I can't get enough of my homeboy Kento Fukamiya/Espada. Like Rintaro and everyone else for that matter, he also suffers from Saber's pacing issues; and like his predecessor Valkyrie from Zero-One, he doesn't get a proper upgrade aside from his Wonder Combo, instead becoming an anti-villain using a completely different powerset and shifting the Raimeiken Ikazuchi out of focus for the Ankokuken Kurayami, and I feel there's a serious missed opportunity to see him use Jaaku Dragon with Alangina. However, Ryo Aoki's performance is probably among the most easily praiseworthy in the whole cast, managing to convey both Kento's kind and knightly stoicism as Espada and his emotionally unstable despair as Calibur perfectly, in conjunction with Yuji Nakata's experienced and expressive stuntwork.

Ren Akamichi/Kenzan's a dark horse favorite for sure. I remember back when Saber was first picking up, people hated this breezy mad lad for being such a simple character at first. Overly concerned with strength? Black and white world view? Annoyingly energetic? Agh, real-feeling character flaws, I hate them, get him away from me! But then y'all came crawling back. Eiji Togashi's apparently a bit of a rookie actor, and it really shows with some stilted delivery and the way he sometimes bobs his head when giving his lines, but man he improves dramatically as the series goes on. His inexperience ironically ends up really selling his character development, and his unexpectedly beautiful relationship with Desast is special evidence of that. The Fuusouken Hayate's three modes and Satoshi Fujita putting them to excellent use through his stellar acrobatic movements are also really cool.

Why did Luna have to be a child for so long? Does Wonderworld not age whoever inherits its power? Well since Luna randomly becomes an adult in Super Hero Senki and some of the final episodes, I guess so? Miku Okamoto does a fine job for a kid actor, but she's basically done all the heavy lifting for the whole series and doesn't give Mayuu Yokota enough time to get a feel for her character as an adult. How did she choose Touma to inherit the power anyway? Does she just subconsciously decide to trust him with it upon seeing how kind and passionate about storytelling he is? Well if that's the case, why didn't Kento get at least some of that power too? He's just as important to the merchan- I mean Luna-chan, isn't he? Why did Tassel pick her over someone who isn't a literal child who'd be understandably terrified about basically becoming an embodiment of storytelling?

Sophia also kinda suffers from the same problems. Rina Chinen's voice is very pleasant to listen to, but she doesn't really do much beyond serving as a source of exposition and support. I think her dynamic with Mei's adorable, and given her kindness I can certainly understand the respect Northern Base has for her, but she doesn't really contribute a whole lot. If she could use the Kurayami and become Calibur all this time, then why didn't she take it from Kento and Yuri and do so earlier when Kento decided to go back to being Espada? I know she's not much of a fighter and as the closet thing the Sword of Logos has to a leader after Isaac's death I'd understand not wanting to put her at risk, but considering Storious is destroying the world, and she's very evidently kicking a lot of ass in the first part of the final battle even in the basic Jaaku Dragon form, I think it would've helped a lot, just sayin'. Tassel at least has the excuse of being unable to interact with the real world, but Sophia obviously didn't just be put in charge of Northern Base just because she's a pawn in Isaac's plans right?

Ryou Ogami/Buster is also a victim of the disjointed character focus. I have no problem believing he's an excellent father and fighter thanks to Yuki Ikushima and Jiro Okamoto, respectively, but he feels a bit flat and simple in comparison. His rivalry with Desast is randomly dropped, his wife doesn't even show up until the final episodes, he's kinda sidelined in terms of action a whole lot. I imagine that must've sucked for the Rider Dads out there. He does get to star in his own manga, and that was pretty good, so I guess I can't be too mad.

Tetsuo Daishinji/Slash fares better though. Hiroaki Oka, being a Kamen Rider fanboy himself, manages to make him among the most relatable characters in the series. Not only are his hyperfixation on swordsmithing and anxiety played surprisingly believably, Hirotsugu Mori letting him cut loose is extremely cathartic and hilarious, and you really feel for him when the Onjuuken Suzune becomes the first victim of Calibur!Kento's sword sealing.

Yuri/Saikou's another dark horse favorite, for me at least. "Oh great, Avalon guy's got even more merchandise to sell, I wonder what his Sword of Light is- it's himself. Well... that's different." I admit, I didn't like him at first. He felt like he was there to fill out character dynamics in the absence of both Rintaro and Kento, I thought his gimmick was too silly even if his design and jingles were bangers, I didn't particularly care for his power set. But then XSwordman came around I totally got it. He's an endearing, hard-working man trying his best to catch up on all the cool shit he missed, unafraid of experimentation, ready to throw down at a moment's notice, serving as a wonderful bit of consistent support for our heroes, a truly knightly individual, an absolute Chad. and goddamn does he make me worry. Tomohiro Ichikawa, I salute you good sir.

Even if they fall short compared to the rest of the cast, the Shindai siblings are at least cool enough to not wanna write out entirely. They kinda devolve into comic relief after they become allies, something that villainous Riders from Chase onwards are very prone to doing, and it's especially awkward in their case because I think that they kinda get off scot-free for obeying the obviously sinister and crazy Isaac for so long, as well as driving a wedge between a lot of people and threatening children in Reika's case. I think their sibling dynamic is nice though, even if Fukuda recycled it from Makoto and Kanon and has some... questionable possessive undertones as a result. It's cool how they're basically foils to Touma and Rintaro though. The dispassionate and methodical Reika/Sabela is beautifully played by Angela Mei and her moments of emotional depth are fascinating to watch. Her Rider form is a thing of beauty, and its use of literal the Eneiken Noroshi's smokescreens and Yuki Miyazawa's precise and deadly stinging strikes are a joy to watch. And while Ken Shonozaki's not given the best direction as the undercooked plate of 7-Eleven fried fish that is Ryoga/Durendal, he manages to sell him as an experienced and hardened warrior with an awkward side that's especially evident in the Zenkaiger specials. His goddamn RWBY weapon that is the Jikokuken Kaiji is absolutely sick, I'm a sucker for transforming weapons and its combination of time and water powers is really cool, especially with Yasuhiko Amai's deliberate and forceful acting in the suit.

Daichi Kamijo/the Second Calibur, for as brief as his story was, was a pretty cool starter villain. Hiroyuki Hirayama brings this poor bastard to life in a genuinely touching way. I love how as Calibur he goes full force on his creative use of Wonder Ride Books for attacks, and his debut as Jaou Dragon got my blood pumping. His end is also deeply tragic, and I really felt for him when he realized just how badly he fucked up. Hayato Fukamiya also does wonders for the backstory, and while he also doesn't get much to work with, Mitsuru Karahashi makes his regrets and love for Kento feel genuine.

Legeiel and Zooous are both very intimidating and entertaining villains. On top of being just the right balance of goofy and threatening, Kairu Takano and Koji Saikawa's stage presences are both very strong, and their mixture of camaraderie and in-fighting is extremely believable. Zooous's rivalry with Rintaro feels incredible to see through to the end, and although Legeiel doesn't get quite the same treatment, Elemental Dragon had such a cool debut that it more than makes up for it. Their final fights are also absolute spectacles. I don't think their sympathetic angle works even close to as well as it does with MetsubouJinrai or even the Gamma, but I get it, power corrupts, and you probably feel a lot of sadness and regret for things you've done when you die unless you're a right bastard.

Isaac/Master Logos/Solomon is kinda generic. As wonderful as Keisuke Soma is, he doesn't get much dimension to work with. The result of that is while he nails being as smug and punchable as possible, he feels almost... comically generic. Genta Umemori from Shinkenger was full of personality! He was also basically some guy, but he was fun, he felt connected to the rest of the cast! Meanwhile the only real time we get to see Isaac's depth is when we see him crying over his failures. I almost appreciate him being unapologetically evil though, since I've seen way too many shows where redeemed villains get off scot free for way worse things, and some where they outright demand you to sympathize with them despite them doing nothing to warrant it.

Bahato/Falchion surprises me by not just being a movie villain whose actions affect the main plot, but also being a movie villain who actually gets to appear in series as a recurring threat! ...and it's not a particularly great showing on his part, sadly. Masashi Taniguchi does a wonderful job with what he's given, but his character feels like a retread of Eternal without any of what made Katsumi Daido a compelling and frightening villain. I'd like to believe Yuri when he says that he used to be a good person and a hero to the people, but I can only hear so many anime villain monologues about the pointlessness of life and the beauty of destruction before I can never take them seriously again. ...I think that's his biggest problem, actually. I thought he was an overall uninteresting and generic villain in the movie, and the cartoon nihilist he's shown to be in series is only a small step up. He still feels like filler. If only there were a far better written and much cooler villain who takes on the Mumeiken Kyomu after his de--

Desast is probably one of the finest anti-villains I've ever seen in recent years. On top of an absolutely badass character design and the excellent combination of Kazuya Okada/Danki Sakae's suit work and Koki Uchiyama's stellar voice acting, his story being so thoroughly intertwined with Ren's makes their shared journey and bromance a borderline Shakespearean tragedy. His struggle for identity despite Storious treating him as nothing more than a failed experiment and the Sword of Logos treating him as a mere monster really gripped me, and the way he uses what little time he has left to encourage Ren into blossoming on his own is absolutely beautiful. I think his enmity with Ogami is criminally underexplored in series, considering he killed several of the previous Riders and how Ogami's in desperate need of screentime.

Then there's our main villain, Kamen Rider Storious. Robin Furuya brings an incredible amount of charisma to this character, expertly portrayed as both a sinister, manipulative bastard , and as a lonely, tragic figure that arguably makes him feel even more villainous. Speaking as a struggling writer myself, it's easy to feel stuck in the idea of "fuck it, who cares, maybe everything is predestined", but I can't imagine what it's like to know that as the truth and carry it with you for all that time. All of your grand ideas have roots from your experiences, and you're not the only one who even could have those experiences. It's easy to just fall into despair and give up trying, but would that make you happy? Sure, Storious is sadistic, he may be fulfilling his goals, he may be ungodly powerful... but it's not enough for him, is it? All of his friends are gone, one of them even at his own hand, he probably doesn't have any idea what to do after he destroys all the world's stories, Touma even reached his full power before he did, and his downfall is so predictable that even a blind person could see it. He even seems to welcome it, what's up with that? But then I realized... OH MY GOD, HE'S THE MAIN VILLAIN USING TOUMA AS THE HERO IN HIS OWN TWISTED STORY, THE BASTARD. He's so far gone, he's so desperate to stick it to the Almighty Book, he's willing to twist the archetype of the Hero's Journey so hard, it snaps in two. What I think is interesting is that he's ironically trying to chase the trend of "edgy superhero story" that became super popular in the 21st century. The Boys, Brightburn, Kamen Rider Amazons, The Sentry, No More Heroes, Magical Girl Site, even mainstream comics from DC and Marvel... Surely Storious must've seen the cruelty and tragedy these stories are filled with, but he chooses to go through with trying to force the world into this direction anyway. Did they, along with seeing the ever-popular tragedies of legendary playwrights and bleak satire of the twentieth century fuel his despair?

And yet... there's one who stands in determination against his ideals.

Our hero, Touma Kamiyama, the titular Kamen Rider portrayed by Syuichiro Naito and Kousuke Asai, he speaks to me on a personal level. There're plenty of jokes to be made about his procrastination in early chapters, his godless fashion sense, and him doing the funny run up the slope, that's all fine and dandy, but I rarely feel so connected to a character the way I did Touma. The struggle to create, find companionship, live your life, reach out to others... these're things a lot of people struggle with, and of course you see them depicted a lot in media about creators, but Saber gets to the root of what the greatest thing about storytelling really is. Giving people hope, while using the pain of the past as fuel for the future. Sure, Storious may be right about how every story has been done as far back as human civilization gets, he may even be right about how any spin or creativity humanity has is outright predestined. It should be pointless to even try, right? That's where Touma Kamiyama disagrees. He didn't spend all that time fighting and creating just to give up at the idea of predestination. His novel writing-fueled creativity in his early training, his devotion to his friends that let him surpass Kamijo as Dragonic Knight, his compassion for the Primitive Dragon that let him combine their powers to destroy Legeiel as Elemental Dragon, his resolve that let Xross Saber dethrone Solomon, and his passion for the craft of storytelling that let our heroes channel their wishes into Wonder Almighty... all stemming from the belief imparted onto him by his predecessor that "Hope lies beyond your resolution." And that you decide how your story ends. He may not be the greatest Rider to some, he may be as lame as others think he is, he may not even be my favorite, but I have no issue calling Touma Kamiyama... Kamen Rider Saber, one of the all time greatest carriers of the Kamen Rider name.

The final chapter's definitely not as great as some other Rider finales, but goddamn. Primitive Dragon consciously choosing to save Touma is so sweet and such a great emotional payoff, I loved jamming out to the opening theme while our boys lay the smackdown on Storious. Wonder Almighty's a fitting final bit to close the main series out with, if not exactly a great one. I think the cover is great, and the book's body is a lovely shade of candy apple red, but I really don't like how its pages are just the covers of the other books copy-pasted onto onto the pages, that feels lazy. Maybe if it were a panorama of all the books' characters, I'd like it a lot more as a symbol of how unified the Swordsmen are, but eh, what can you do? On a related note, does this mean all the "last episode extra final forms" of the Reiwa Era are gonna be named after their series's opening? That's a neat idea.

I felt a lot of feelings seeing all those video messages of Rider fans all across Japan talking about their favorite stories, and how their passion and fond memories help reshape the world. Mei's monologue at the ceremony about is also really touching and- IS THAT A HUMAGEAR!? :O

Y-yeah dude, it is! Wow, where have you guys been for the past 48 episodes?! Are you guys doing okay? How come you're like... the only one here? Is the technology of Hiden Intelligence only really that prevalent in that very specific metropolitan part of Japan and they're just not coming around much over here? Is it like Dragon Ball where anthropomorphic animals are just vibin' with humans while the heroes are off kicking ass? Apparently he's played by Hasegawa Keiichi, who wrote this episode and had the award ceremony named after him. ...is Hasegawa Keiichi a HumaGear in this universe then? Did he set up this award ceremony in Touma's honor? If so, why is it named after him? Did reading one of Touma's books lead to his Singularity? I know this is just a cameo, but... god, I have so many questions that probably will never be satisfactorily answered.

Overall, if I had to compare Saber to anything, it'd probably be Sam Reimi's Spider-Man trilogy. It's awkward, stupid, overwrought, undercooked, illogically written, scattershot, cheesy as fuck, and has a tendency to squander its otherwise fine execution; but the sheer passion for storytelling, sense of spectacle, deeply fascinating characters, and belief in the ideals set forth by the cast, crew, and fans are absolutely admirable. Improvements would certainly make it an overall better experience, to be sure, but there's something deeply captivating about how wonky this series is. Seeing everybody get their happy ending after all they've been through felt extremely gratifying though, and I may have to wait another for the epilogue to and then wait for Revice, but... man. I'm hella proud of our awkwardly-emoting, fashion disaster novelist and all of his heavily flawed friends for carrying the Kamen Rider name on to the future. Here's hoping Revice will keep it going.

Alright, that's everything I wanted to talk about. Sorry this was so long and ramble-y, I had a lot to say. I'll probably be liveblogging Revice as episodes of that come out, so... look forward to that, I guess. See ya.

[theindiegamereview]

Meet the creative team: “Spellstone”

Are you a collectible card game (CCG) fan? If so, read on, because this week we spoke to the makers of Spellstone, a free-to-play (F2P) casual story-based fantasy card game that features vibrant, colourful, hand-drawn art on hundreds of beautiful cards that you can acquire and use in battle, both against the computer and other players!

TIGR: PABLO and DUSTIN are artists who have worked on Spellstone's art, helping create some of the iconic characters Spellstone fans know and love. We asked them how they came to work on the game, as well as what intrigued them about this project.

DUSTIN: I was working as a contract artist when I was asked to create some sample cards for a potential CCG, which is something I'd always wanted to do. The samples I submitted eventually led to me getting a contract to create the initial art for Spellstone. After about four months, I was offered a full-time position. I had such a great experience working with the team that I jumped at the opportunity!

PABLO: Prior to starting work on Spellstone, I remember doing an art piece to test my skills. I greatly enjoyed that because I particularly liked this game's art style - which is actually similar to my own! There were still slight differences though, so I've had to adapt a little. Blending my own personal style into an existing one was challenging. But something that intrigued me about Spellstone was the variety of factions in the game. Each and every one opens up a big array of possibilities when it comes to creating a character. I felt my options were unlimited and I loved it!

TIGR: Spellstone features many different cards and characters. We wanted to know who conceptualises all this, and how much creative licence artists get when crafting a character. FERNANDO, currently the main artist for the game, gave us more insight.

FERNANDO:  That Spellstone has such an immense variety of characters means it's a complete and delightful dish for artists. It's hugely gratifying to find such visual diversity with which to play with. You're completely free to create, as long as you respect the game's universe and visual language.

As for the process, the concept of what a card must look like and how it must be functional in terms of gameplay comes from the guys in the game design department. Very creative people... sorcerers maybe? I don't know. Haha!

From a brief but concise description they give me, I can get a sense of what kind of character and action they want to see in a card. Once I have all the information I need to start sketching, my favourite hour finally begins: creative hour!

If the card description involves an existing type of character, like a goblin, part of the fun has to do with the way you depict that character, situation, action and specific emotion. There's also some freedom to create from scratch if needed - that's exciting and challenging! Sometimes the ideas come from a mix of characters, and that's when the laboratory inside my mind starts working: I press a button and something cool, spooky or funny comes out - whatever the game requires. Other times, new concepts require that I look for approximate references of what's needed, so that serves as the starting point. No matter what, it's always a very enjoyable process. Sometimes we have to make corrections, that's true. But as with everything in life, this is necessary for things to work properly. You may have to redraw stuff, but finally the card is done - it works, it delivers and it entertains!

  TIGR: In Spellstone, cards can be upgraded from a single to a dual to a quad, and we really like that this sometimes tells a "mini story" of of sorts through the artwork. Some are funny (we just love Honeycomb Lobber!), some cute (Bomb Spirit is soooo adorable when he’s angry!), some uplifting (Aurora Shaver ranks among our favourites), and some, um, a bit disturbing, to be honest (Cleaverstorm Hunter, anyone?!)! And some are just sad - we can't help but feel sorry for the poor li'l forest furries that presumably got devoured by Alphamech Stalker! We asked the team how they came up with ideas for all these tiny narratives, and MELINDA, one of the game designers, told us more.

MELINDA: When I was younger, there were a few creatures in video games that terrified me. One of those I remembered most was Medusa, an air jellyfish from Ecco: The Tides of Time. While traversing through a water pathway in the sky, Medusa would try to pick up Ecco the dolphin and fling him off the path. Tetraspout's concept came from that, and you can even see poor little dolphins getting swept up in its attack!

  TIGR: We asked the team if there were any cards they particularly liked creating, or found challenging to conceptualise. IVÁN, a colorist who worked briefly on the game, chipped in, as did TONY and RHADA, two of Spellstone's game designers.

DUSTIN: I loved working on the goblin cards! You could get silly with them. Frogs were a lot of fun too - the variety of colours made them interesting. For me, the water cards were challenging but I grew to love working on them.

PABLO: My favourite characters are Goblins! You can play around with them, making them look funny even when the card is telling a dark story, like a massacre. All of the cards were challenging to create!

IVÁN: I enjoyed working on Hedron The Critical Threat, Zyd The Unhinged, and some awesome Insect cards that have yet to be released (as of the time of this interview). I mostly liked them because of their cool concepts and Fernando's awesome sketches. Hedron in particular was a technical painting challenge, as it has textures, transparencies and glow!

TONY: As something of an artist myself (/sarcasm), the card I am most proud of has to be Dinged Waptor. Or really any of the cards I did for the April Fool's event, which is about the only time the art team lets me anywhere near card art. :) For April Fool's, I decided it would be funny to try my hand at drawing some cards I felt players would enjoy. So the first year I drew some original characters that consisted of a few stick figures, a chicken, and a bomb. The response was good, so the following year I continued the tradition, eventually going through and tracing some famous cards like Winged Raptor. My one rule while making these cards was that I could not erase what I did!

RHADA: We used to sell boxes that contained two new premium cards instead of one. We thought of making both cards in the box thematically linked. At the same time, while brainstorming concepts for dragons, I thought we could try to make cards that formed a bigger picture on the battlefield when placed consecutively, side by side. The initial idea was a serpent whose artwork overflowed into a second card, and after some iteration, we stumbled upon the idea of a dragon dance. The result was very cool!

TIGR: With the Spellstone story campaign recently concluded, we asked what was next in store for Spellstone fans. Would there be anymore new characters and amazing art to look forward to?

TONY: Absolutely! While the main story has come to a close, we still look forward to adding new characters, cards, and art to the game that lets our artists have fun and shows off the world of Spellstone.

TIGR: And finally, the most important question of all: would real-life Spellstone merchandise ever be made available for fans of the game? We really want a plushie of the adorable Bomb Spirit (complete with detachable bombs, perhaps?), as well as his angry counterpart, Firebomb Spirit! Also for Quetee Que and Adorabilis, please! And would there ever be any actual physical Spellstone cards produced for collectors?

TONY: I would personally love to see real-life merchandise, but we currently do not have the means to take on such an endeavour. Maybe one day we can strike a partnership with a team that can make this happen!

We thank the Spellstone team for their time and all the wonderful art assets that accompany this interview! Check out the game here on Kongregate, on Steam, or on mobile - three different ways you can enjoy this fun, cheeky and adorable CCG!

P.S. We just had to include our favourite card: Darkwater Adonis - don’t be fooled by his charms!

[startwithbrooklyn]

THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / SEPTEMBER 28-29, 2019 // the bonny scot

posting this a day later than normal because this is one of the rare episodes that shows a passage of time from one day to the next yayy love that for them

-wonder what filming these beginning sexy scenes is like for them in real life

-sooooo can lucy see nancys sexy dream? is she judging? does this mean she likes nancy with owen or nick more? or is she trying to tell nancy that her sex dreams are irrelevant to the mystery at hand and she needs to focus?

-seeing people in the ✨prison chair✨: gomber, carson, karen (voting for josh s3 just saying)

-completely ignores carson's question about herself typical nance

-"or maybe i did stumble across a knife" its like hes trying to make the case against him look plausible while attempting to maintain innocence. this is a slippery slope for carson to try and encourage her to keep her pacified + hide the truth while also trying to keep her from getting involved bc hudsons

-"genetics gets you in the door" aaaaand then she walks in to everetts office to meet him and crashes their family dinner

-ok who tf is dawn and why is she in charge here

-this guidance counselor of nicks is my favorite person

-"i admire your allergy to pleasantries" bess and nancy both have reveals to big families but nancy does not have the graceful, accepting reveal to her rich family like bess does at this lunch. nancys reveal is messy, cold, bloodstained and sticky-fingered, not nice in any way whatsoever. and this little chat with everett (bit of a parallel to lucy's) just highlights how nancy is always bad at bargaining with her grandparents*- always trying to fight on their level but giving up her equal hand bc she doesnt know how to hide it when they bring up something she doesnt know. like confronting celia at the masque: she was so confident with her theory and what she knew, but then we got a "what does that mean?" like. the instant you say that, you lose. and she walked right into the "yes i do have someone, hes in jail" 🤦🏼‍♀️ even in the car with ryan at the end of s1, he literally just fucking leaves her there. like 🤷🏼‍♀️ what did u think was gonna happen sis?? for all she can predict how past things lead to present circumstances shes fucking awful at seeing the direct future *(grandparents except for patrice bc her dementia makes her inaccessable)

-lmaooooo this awko ass portrait...i get the empty space is for nance but who on earth thought this was a good pic??

-LISBETH 🥺💙

-"will u help the claw for me?" george struggles financially to keep her livelihood while nancy is somehow shown as being taken care of even when her parent is incarcerated; both nancy and george live in single parent homes now with mention of both medical debt and george being breadwinner yet nancy has no struggles while george does. (i wonder if ryan had been able to help george here how the story would have changed)

-"when it comes to following people around without their knowledge or consent i am somewhat of a repeat offender" 😂😂😂

-"he wasnt endgame after all" BESS lmaoooo

-"...okay." lmaoooo i fuckin love owen

-i was hoping the girls' faces would be more shocked like with a glance to owen but they just....werent

-"we're the good guys" <---- this statement is soooo interesting in terms of how they structure the show and how the characters see themselves (its an interesting contrast with the more definitive good vs evil with things that are both clearly good and clearly evil but theres also a lot of moral grey area here, the show is kinda swamped in it. are nancy and crew the good guys? are they the bad guys in someone else's story? concerns.)

-"i'd call it more than just stuff" like why did u concede that??? and then the shit about oof that didnt sound like a compliment lmaoooooo why does she suck at arguing?? she and owen wouldnt work long term bc theyre so similar (as mentioned later on)

-i LOVE george slowly falling in love with nick here- hence how upset she gets when nick bails on her for nancy later (which is totally justified!!!)

-i am LIVING for the little nod this driver guy gives bess when she turns back around all nervous 😂

-"i do like buying things" i would so say that too tbh

-"you'd have plenty to talk about" LMFAOOOOOOO SHE KNOWS "marvins dont marry drivers" so diana is totally fine with the gay its just the poor she has a problem with 😂💙fuckin love that

-love how nancy just casually ruins everything for nick/george lmaooo

-"i have seen you at your best, nancy, and there is nothing like it." 🥴😳 i love this still-in-love look nancy gives him thats so strong he had to change the subject

-so is haunting time 11 pm? from that clock of bashiir's?

-how do NO neighbors notice this fucking water and shit

-these are TOTALLY AWFUL fake screams from the bonny scot crew 😭

-"i know well enough not to get involved when he's in play" both carson and ryan avoid engaging with everett even though nancy is willing to do so armed with less info and more balls/ but "could i trust him" and ryan says yes lmaooooo NO honey + that makes ryan 0/2 for helping the girls when they ask this ep

-"find a project of your own" and he does, with his youth center 🙏🏻💙 what s2 foreshadowing!

-"god i wish i still drank" 😂😂😂

-"she is darling." 💙👌🏻

-okay wtf is mirror bay??

-i really wonder about the extent of celia x sebastians relationship here. did she truly care about him or was it just secret and exciting sex? also would love more hints of diana vs celia moments like these. celia doesnt even look upset. i mean shes had time to deal but like wtf. and who exactly is sebastian to diana? not her husband? like damn what if he was. somehow i doubt she'd talk about him diddling celia if diana was disrespected also

-i wonder if celia being so invested in dna testing nancy was bc everrett dna tested ryan to make sure he was his bc of sebastian / other men (which would be totally valid on his part!! but wouldnt it be funny as fuck if ryan wasnt his 😂)

-what a neat hiding place in this frame lmaooo who put that in for them tho? like how do u go about ordering that

-"you certainly are your fathers daughter" this quote is doubly ironic and foreshadowy bc theyre referencing carson here as being a useful hudson attaché but nancy is playing everett just like ryan played celia about putting his house up (but TRIPLY ironic bc carson pulls off the long con of hiding nancy from the hudsons right under their noses this whole time!) the one time nancy is successful against them

-that bess/lisbeth look while lisbeth does something badass (+diana reassessing now that lisbeth has been revealed to be useful)

-"almost as fun as a real fight" why do i believe him? lmaoooo a bit weird that he would enjoy a fight w a partner, but i also think this is an acknowledgement of nancy being an "opponent" who exists at his level. but i also love the "let me take you out" as a direct mirror of her relationship with nick, where she avoids the public acknowledgment/"going out" but prefers the more subtle/hidden arrangements of staying in. but as shown with later eps, owen is way more capable of meeting nancy where shes at, which is so important to her + the only way of getting close to nancy. (the only foil is ace who somehow is able to do both)

-"not always about a guy" <---- this could have been such a powerful statement if the show had thought having nancy end up alone/choose herself instead of pitting her between love interests (nick, owen, gil, even potentially ace, in only 2 seasons) was a more worthy stance to take ; as an aro/ace person i cant tell you how much i would kill to see just one female protag choose herself over a man. and its more realistic to end up alone than have a happy ending anyway, for all that these shows try to be as "real" and gritty grimdark as possible

-"is that what you want?" this is an interesting question to his mother- like maybe he senses her unhappiness? combined with his issues with his father- still trying to look out for his mom? either way it's sweet. (it could also potentially work as foreshadowing of something happening to her, but i think that was played with but then diverted when it was revealed who really killed her) "i think its time i steer this ship" still kind of patriarchal tho. i get that its him coming into his own as a dad technically but still. i also like how he calls her "mother" and not mom

-love that old white people thumbs up at george asking about his clams 👍🏻

-okay fuck dawn tho lmfaoooo

-"stressful dinner huh?" 😂 i fucking love lisbeth so much why didnt they bring her back (wouldnt it be Fucking Hilarious if they brought lisbeth back to bounce bess on her expired visa since the marvins kicked her out and didnt fix it lmaoooooo)

-BESS IS A TOP lmaooooooo i fuckin knew it

-nick says "you can pay me back" wonder if thats gonna come back in s3 considering their "marital problems" (also, those bonds are sosus lmfaoooo if any single person cashing those was looked at sideways they'd confess in 2 seconds that some random guy is handing out bearer bonds they dont even make anymore with absolutely zero proof as to how he got them)

-"you wanna finish what you started?" 👀 (dont mind if i do)

-"i need my dad back" parallels s2 when she asks him to come home

-parent politics: "you are taking your life in your hands / no, i'm putting it in yours" vs "i know well enough not to get involved when hes in play" both carson and ryan try to dissuade nancy from pursuing her pulling this con on everett but go about it different ways: carson is wildly concerned with nancys physical wellbeing but ryan appears to be leaning more towards weighing the odds for her/ like a "you cant win so cut your losses/dont try" scenario which interestingly might have more weight with nancy; its easy for her to brush aside carson's worrying like second nature but nancy has been established to be a determined winner, and ryan speaks to her here like shes a beginners luck prodigy at a blackjack table by encouraging her to keep her record clean by not dealing in this next round. of course she herself admits shes incapable of not dealing in ie "you know me better than that" but i have lots more thoughts on how effective ryans approaches to nancy can be sometimes (saving for the reveal ep 🙏🏻)

-wonder what all carson knows about the hudsons? + that look on his face when he hangs up... wonder if he was just lying to her about knowing anything or just ashamed at having to admit bad things hes done for them

-love nick & bashiir waiting together 🙏🏻💙+ nicks very strong and pointed "good night" as a means of ending his convo w nancy on his terms (gotta reinforce those boundaries man!)

and lastly

-celia + that gossip girl moment when she just throws the whole phone away 😂(wonder if she was just talking to "gus" or whoever that guy was. keep forgetting the bobbseys' dad is in prison too, wonder if he'll feature in s3)

[rivalsforlife]

I DIDNT KNOW YOU WERE DOING COMMENTARY hope it's not too late to ask for The Scene at the end of chapter 5 of the catch up game?? if no one else has asked?

It is never too late to ask!! Genuinely you could probably ask me six months from now and I’ll ramble on about all this, I’m generally down to talk about my writing all the time. (And I’m actually a little surprised nobody asked about The Scene yet... oh well haha)

First though: have you seen this art yet? If you haven’t you should. It was going around twitter again lately and I love it a lot so I wanted to advertise it while I had the chance.

Anyways, keeping under a “keep reading” here:

So. The Scene. First I’ll present my notes from the outline when I was trying to figure out this fic:

Miles lets his feelings slip, Phoenix doesn’t take it too well, they part on a kind of awkward note.

Somehow “kind of an awkward note” ended up being uhhh that!

Anyways before we get into this I want to say that I really did not think it would have that much of an emotional impact? I got a much bigger reaction than I thought and that’s around when people really started talking about it on the narumitsu discord and stuff, so I ended up for the rest of the week soooo stressed out that I’d accidentally gone in a completely different direction than I’d planned and set people’s expectations too high and they would be COMPLETELY DISAPPOINTED IN THE REST OF THE FIC but uh luckily that didn’t happen! I think. At least if anyone was super disappointed they didn’t tell me about it!

And it was probably partially that I am not very uhh good with emotions and also probably that I got pretty desensitized to my work but I genuinely did not think it was that bad until I saw Ro’s art and then went “ohhh suddenly I am consumed with so much guilt...” (and also doubted how in character this scene was. how can ANYONE say no to that face --)

Most critically though, this scene distracted everyone from whatever the hell was going on with the casefic earlier in the chapter, so overall I think it’s a success.

Sorry it’s taking a while to get to the actual scene, but I wrote a few drafts of this thing beforehand and modified it a lot trying to get it right. I needed it to be sufficiently dramatic but I didn’t want it to seem like... I was just adding it in there for extra conflict? Like you know sometimes you read stuff and you’re like “where the hell did this sudden argument come from” yeah. I wanted to avoid that if I could, so partially this was supported by the weight of chapter 4 to explain Phoenix’s reasons for the rejection and then chapter 6 is supposed to elaborate more, but I still needed this to stand fairly well on its own.

The overall theme of this chapter was “Opposites”, and again, here’s what I had in my fic notes:

I want to contrast how Phoenix sees Miles and how Miles sees Phoenix. Because they both kind of see each other as an amazing person while seeing themselves as failures. Maybe at the end Phoenix is kind of putting himself down and Miles argues about it and then they have a slight argument. Miles lets his feelings slip, Phoenix doesn’t take it too well, they part on a kind of awkward note.

I couldn’t really find a way to integrate this conversation in naturally, so I could only get Phoenix’s perspective in there a little bit. Originally Miles’ confession wasn’t supposed to be planned, just a spur of the moment in the middle of an argument where Phoenix kind of goes “I don’t understand why you keep hanging out with me, why are you spending so much time with me, I’m not struggling, I don’t need you worrying about me” and Miles interrupts with a “Because I love you, you idiot!” ... But I couldn’t get that to work because the buildup into the argument felt too abrupt. 

Last little bit of something just before the argument (some of the dialogue here went into the chapter 4 dinner conversation instead):

Miles: (quietly) I’ve spent most of my life trying to climb higher in my career, in order to fight corruption as best I could. And I have, and every day my mission is growing closer to completion, or at least as much as it can. But after that… (staring at some kids’ toy) what’s left for me? I’ve taken a rather unconventional path through life. I’m starting to wonder about opportunities I’ve missed.

Phoenix: (jokingly) Is that some long-winded way of telling me you’re planning on settling down?

Miles: I’d never settle. But in some sense, I suppose so.

Phoenix: (stopping in his tracks) You’re kidding. L-Like, what, in a year or so I’m gonna walk in to your office one day and find you with a wife and kids?

Miles: (rolling his eyes) You do know that I’m gay, don’t you? And why would I keep them in my office? There’s no need to be so melodramatic, Wright.

Again couldn’t fit it in I just found it funny. ANYWAYS FINALLY MOVING AWAY FROM THE DRAFTS AND TO THE ACTUAL THING, I’ll skip ahead a bit to just before the confession:

“How long has it been since I came here?” 

“I dunno… since before I got my badge back, probably.”

“That sounds about right.” Edgeworth sighed and leaned against Phoenix’s desk. “I’ve barely gotten the chance to see you, since you got your badge back and I took my new position. I’ve missed going up against you in court.”

“I don’t,” Phoenix teased, slipping his case notes into his desk drawer. “You’re a nightmare.”

“You’re one to talk.” The corners of Edgeworth’s eyes crinkled as he looked over at him. “You can be so infuriating, but I do like working with you. I had fun today.”

Phoenix raised an eyebrow. “Fun? You?”

“I suppose age has softened me up.”

“I didn’t think anything could soften you up.”

“You’d be surprised. I often have fun when I’m with you. I always…” He trailed off, averting his eyes and gripping his elbow. “I’ve been… thinking, a bit. On our earlier conversation.”

So basically... Miles got preeetty close to confessing during their dinner in chapter 4, but kinda backed out at the last moment, and he’s been agonizing over this ever since. Because the way he interpreted their conversation was sort of “We both want to move forward into a relationship but don’t know how to take the steps to do so”, whereas Phoenix interpreted more as a consensus that “We could probably start a relationship and there are feelings there but it wouldn’t really work out so we just won’t ever talk about it”.

And Miles throughout this fic assumed that Phoenix has been in love with him for a while and only holding back for Miles’ own sake, and waiting for Miles to signal that he’s actually ready to move into a romantic relationship. ... Which is very much not the case. What makes today different though is that Miles got to watch Phoenix solve mysteries, and I’m of the opinion that Miles considers Phoenix at his most attractive when he is uncovering the truth!! so Miles pretty much just saw him solve this case and go “I must kiss this man on the lips Right Now” but thought he should clear some things up before he did that.

which is good because if he just walked up to Phoenix and kissed him without preamble I’m pretty sure Phoenix would have died, so.

Something imperceptibly changed in the atmosphere. It made Phoenix’s heart race faster in anticipation. “Oh? Which one?”

“The one we had during the last dinner we shared.”

“O-Oh.” That had been weeks ago. Surely Phoenix had forgotten something.

“Everything has changed so much, over the course of my career, between us.” Edgeworth’s eyes flickered up to him briefly before settling back down on the desk. “I’ve never been afraid of moving forward, but this, I want…” He exhaled, shakily. “Give me a minute. This is… difficult.”

Phoenix kind of... knows, subconsciously, where this is going, but he’s trying to deny it until the last minute because he’s very unprepared and has no idea how to deal with this... which will become very clear by the end of the scene.

Miles is tricky to write in a confession scene because he can be kind of weird with emotions? Sometimes he’ll give these Grand Speeches about how much That Man means to him but at the same time he struggled a lot with talking about his feelings during the trilogy and I think he’d still struggle with it now. Especially something as raw and vulnerable as a love confession.

And Miles is also someone who is, at least by the Investigations duology, determined to pursue what is Right and what is the Truth without any sort of hesitation. However pursuing Wright is different. (insert horrible forced laugh track)

“W-Well, don’t strain yourself,” Phoenix insisted. “We can talk another day. I-It’s getting late, after all, we should —”

“We should stop dancing around the issue.” Edgeworth’s eyes snapped up and locked with Phoenix’s, pinning him in place. “Don’t go easy on me now, of all times.”

oh man I have to admit I got really into Persona 5 Royal for like a few weeks around the time I was writing this and that “don’t go easy on me now of all times” is looosely inspired by a similar line in there that’s like “do you think I’d be happy with being shown mercy now, of all times?” because although it’s a different dynamic than narumitsu I was uh. intrigued.

... sorry it’s so vague I wanted to avoid spoilers anyways, moving on,

Phoenix’s mouth ran dry. Edgeworth couldn’t possibly be planning to —

“Everything has changed between us,” continued Edgeworth. “I want things to — to continue to change, I-I want to be closer, is—” He sucked a breath in through his teeth “— is it not obvious?”

Hadn’t they agreed, in that way they could agree without saying a word, that they were never going to talk about this?

Phoenix broke his gaze. “No. It’s not. I— I don’t want to argue with you. It’s late.”

Pretty much same as previous notes: Phoenix in extreme denial that this is actually happening whereas Miles is just trying to force it all out.

Phoenix is kind of trying to talk Miles down from confessing; Miles is sort of interpreting it as “Wright isn’t going to let me get away with not actually saying this so I need to be more direct.” 

I’m sure that later when Miles is curled up on his bed wondering where he went wrong he’ll think of that :)

“Phoenix.”

The use of his first name forced Phoenix to look up again.

Edgeworth stared at him for a long time. There was something impossible swimming just under the surface of his grey eyes.

“Phoenix Wright,” he said. “I am in love with you.”

HE DID IT!! He’s so brave I’m sure that nothing can go wrong!!

Gossip was one thing. Lingering touches and stolen glances, Phoenix could deal with those. The knowledge that Edgeworth was interested in him in a not-so-platonic way… that was more than enough.

This, hearing Edgeworth say the words out loud, was another thing entirely. Even if Phoenix already knew. Nothing could have prepared him for — for whatever this was, for Edgeworth, looking at him all open and vulnerable, and — and saying —

“Wh… What…?”

Edgeworth tilted his head slightly to the side, causing his bangs to fall into his face. “Surely you’ve figured it out already?”

“I-I don’t understand…”

At first there was a line right after “Even if Phoenix already knew” that was “Even if he felt the same”, but then I decided to make it so Phoenix can’t even admit his feelings to himself, so I cut that one out.

Anyways this is shocking to Phoenix partially because of Denial but also because he didn’t expect Miles to actually come out and say something like this. He’s used to Miles being closed off with his emotions and doesn’t think him the type to ever directly acknowledge them, so it’s got him totally off guard, too. It’s unpredictable for someone who is supposed to know Miles so well so it’s very unnerving for him.

“I… I think you are incredible,” said Edgeworth. “Your single-minded dedication to truth and justice. Your compassion. Your mercy. The way you… brought light, brought life, back into my world. You can be so frustrating, and stubborn, but that’s part of why I have always admired you so much.” The corners of his eyes softened. “You saved me a thousand times over, and I want to spend the rest of my life by your side… however you want me.”

Miles generally people go on at least one date before proposing marriage but okay.

One thing I find interesting about Miles as a character is that he’s very much an all-or-nothing kind of person... he doesn’t ever really half-ass things and he doesn’t know how to do things gradually haha. He won’t allow the truth to be covered in darkness for even a moment even if it makes things easier for him in the long run. Saying “I think you’re great, maybe we should go on a few dates and see how things end up?” is probably the SENSIBLE thing to say, but Miles puts 100% of himself into everything that he does post-character development; and he’s secure enough in his relationship with Phoenix that he doesn’t really feel the need to test the waters. Plus Miles is allergic to uncertainty, so by the time he confesses he’d need to be absolutely certain that he loved Phoenix Wright and was prepared to pretty much go all in with him.

after all Phoenix feels the same way right!!

Phoenix stared. His heartbeat was reverberating in his ears. “I don’t know what to say. … Me.”

“Who else?”

“Who — a-anyone else. God, Edgeworth, what even is that shit, about me being i-intelligent, and dedicated, and compassionate, and — and — incredible, geez, I’m a wreck! I—” His voice wavered into a fit of near hysteria. “The only reason I’ve gotten this far is ‘cause I’ve always had amazing people by my side, and — and once they’re gone I’m back to whatever I usually am, I-I only have this one suit, I still haven’t got my freaking driver’s license, I don’t think I’ve eaten anything but instant meals in a month—”

(And he looked to Edgeworth, desperately, but Edgeworth was still gazing at him, expression gentle, gentle yet unyielding, not taking back his words or expressing an ounce of regret — why wasn’t he changing his mind —)

“You’re describing yourself more than me,” said Phoenix weakly. “Really, I’m not — I’m not like that, okay, I’m not…” He forced himself to take a deep breath. “Why are you telling me this?”

This is the one part that stayed consistent throughout all drafts of this scene haha. Some of it is echoes from what Godot told him back in Bridge to the Turnabout about him always needing someone to swoop in at the last minute to the rescue; others are sort of a loose refence to his behaviour during the beginning of RFTA and Reunion and Turnabout where he couldn’t really function without Maya there to look after.

This part sort of ties more into that objective I had with this chapter of contrasting how they see themselves; they both see each other as incredible people, because they don’t really get to see inside each other and see how much of a wreck they feel.

Also the very first sort of script of this confession had Phoenix saying “I thought you knew me better than this!” but that just seemed way too cruel for this haha.

“I know that I… that I have difficulty with these things,” said Edgeworth, fingers gripping the edge of the desk. “I’ve never been the most open of people and we’ve — we’ve always been so distant, for so long. I wasn’t there for you when I should have been, and I want that to change. Because, ever since we met… you’ve been such a major part of my life. I never thought I would live to be older than my father. I never thought I would be happy with myself. But you, you came into my life, and you changed all that.”

(That wasn’t you,) a voice in Phoenix’s heart whispered. (You only started it. The rest was all him.)

“But I don’t want to be satisfied with what I have right now. I still want more. There’s still a part of life I want to explore, and… I want to do it with you.”

(He’s always been fine without you. One day he’s going to realize it too, and then…)

“I’m tired of hiding my emotions and being too afraid to upset the status quo when it comes to relationships. I refuse to be scared of that anymore.”

(Why isn’t he scared, too?)

ugh this was the hardest part to write I think...? Trying to figure out a way to get Phoenix’s internal feelings across where it doesn’t come out of nowhere. I settled with a lot of internal thoughts that are just like... self-loathing, pretty much.

Meanwhile Miles has prepared this whole emotional monologue that Phoenix is only half listening to, basically about what a huge impact Phoenix has had in his life and how he’s sort of... now that he’s presumably made large steps to fixing the justice system he’s turning to more personal goals in life, and one of those goals is spending his life with Phoenix, if he can be brave enough to do it.

Phoenix isn’t paying attention though because he’s too busy panicking...

“Most of all, I… I couldn’t hide anything from you for long. I’d trust you with the world. You’re my equal, and my opposite.” Something resembling a shaky smile crossed Edgeworth’s face. “And I love you.”

me shoving the “theme of the day” in there awkwardly

But he smiles!! This is one of the rare occasions where Miles kind of does smile... there’s a lot of “almost-smile”s or brief smiles and Miles is scared out of his wits here but he’s happy. he finally got that off his chest. he was brave and he told Phoenix how he felt and they’ll be so, so happy together, nothing can possibly go wrong,

The words knocked out any breath Phoenix had managed to regain. His skin suddenly felt cold and clammy, and he was faced with vertigo more intense than standing on rooftops. What was happening to him?

There was something he was supposed to say to this. He should react to this normally. His mouth was drier than a desert. His tongue felt unsightly and awkward in his mouth.

“I shouldn’t have to tell you that if I have somehow misinterpreted, I won’t mention this again.” Unease and uncertainty flickered behind Edgeworth’s eyes. “And I would never be upset, as long as you tell me the truth. I want to take the next steps of my life with you. … Do you feel the same way?”

oh yeah this part was a little tricky too. Pretty much Phoenix is on the verge of a full-blown panic attack and cannot think of a response, even a nice polite rejection... and finally Miles starts realizing that something’s off, because before he was just running on adrenaline to try and get his feelings out that he didn’t stop to examine Phoenix’s reactions, otherwise he would’ve started overthinking and psyched himself out. But now that he got it out and seeing Phoenix pretty much in shock he’s starting to worry he’d made a mistake.

Also “unease and uncertainty” is definitely an “unnecessary feelings” reference because I’m shameless.

Yes, Phoenix wanted to say, yes, I do, and say what he felt, what he wanted. But the words wouldn’t come.

Why couldn’t he say it? It should be easy. If he truly wanted this, it should be as easy as breathing.

His vision swam with pink butterflies, he ran his tongue over the scars in his mouth, his breath caught jagged on the edges of chains —

Aaaand if either one of them had the magatama right now there would be the psyche-locks! I was gonna elaborate on this a lot but this is so far waaay longer than I intended so I’ll spare you and give a brief summary.

Essentially there are three locks. I wrote them as sort of representing each issue that Phoenix needs to acknowledge for them to break -- not necessarily fix, because that would be a super tricky thing, but acknowledging they’re there is a start. They’re pretty much “Trust”, “Abandonment”, and “Vulnerability”. Later I realized those issues are pretty much tied up in each other so instead I just made it so that each one is set by a traumatic event, and then acknowledging those events is what breaks them.

The first is an obvious “Dahlia and Iris really screwed up Phoenix’s ability to trust a partner romantically”. I love Iris but she really did mess him up as well. Phoenix kind of convinced himself he’s over this issue now since Iris was a good person! but really he’s still messed up about it. (And that’s where the butterflies + scars in his mouth sort of come from). Talking to Iris and acknowledging that he’s still hurting over it is what breaks this one.

The second is more directly related to all the times Miles himself has abandoned him particularly throughout the series. Some of the hurt when Miles prosecuted him in Turnabout Sisters, and definitely a lot regarding “Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth Chooses Death”, it’s pretty much him being scared to get /too/ attached to Miles because he fears Miles might abandon him again. This one breaks in chapter 7 when he has the whole realization that Miles might die and leave him regardless, and acknowledges how afraid he is of Miles leaving again.

And the last is more of acknowledging his need to be needed by people and help people but they move on without him and not don’t really him in their lives. This built up more gradually... with littler things like Apollo leaving the Agency and Maya not being around as much and Trucy moving out. Neither of these are Big Bad Traumatic Events like the other two but it’s still an issue Phoenix has that he needs to acknowledge. Trucy’s letter breaks this one by telling him he’s never going to be alone and they all love him and are there for him. And that’s why right after reading the letter he can tell Miles that he loves him.

So that’s that. Moving back to the actual story now...

“Phoenix?”

Edgeworth still stood so close, too close, and when Phoenix breathed his senses were assaulted by the scent of his cologne and — and he was too close, and his words were too much, Edgeworth couldn’t be in love with him. Attracted, sure, but love — how could he so easily say love?

This wasn’t like Edgeworth. This wasn’t how things were before, this wasn’t how things had always been, every time things changed too fast something would go wrong, every time things changed too fast Edgeworth would leave again —

(— and right now Edgeworth’s body was coiled tight with tension, like a spring, ready to take off at any sudden movement —)

— and Phoenix couldn’t say a word.

Fairly self-explanatory I think: basically acknowledging that fear that Miles is going to leave again.

Phoenix was standing on the edge of a turnabout. Somewhere he’d have to take the plunge for victory, for the truth. He’d never shied from them before. He’d always accepted the risks. And they’d (almost always) paid off.

But something had Phoenix in a vice. Dark chains that wrapped around his chest and constricted his lungs. Something that would drown him if he took the plunge. Something that whispered that he could not risk this, his heart and his life in one. There was too much to lose. It was all too much.

That little (almost always) there is referencing that one time he presented the critical case-changing evidence and got disbarred for it; his disbarment messed him up pretty bad too, I guess it’d fit in the category of the third psyche-lock.

And of course the second paragraph references the psyche-locks more directly before they actually show up.

The words came. They weren’t the ones he wanted.

“No,” said Phoenix. “No, I don’t.”

The rattling in Phoenix’s head cut out. Silence fell over the room.

Pretty much once Phoenix stops pressing the issue the psyche-locks stop shaking. I imagine they’re a pretty terrible thing to break directly; he can’t do it on his own like this.

“... I see,” said Edgeworth, and something snapped shut, drew tight, rigid, back to a statue. “I thought… nevermind.”

Miles kind of draws back into himself all tightly-controlled, less open than before, because that really hurt him a lot. He’d probably prefer it than Phoenix being all evasive and sort of reassuring because he prefers people just cut straight to the facts, but that was direct even for him.

And of course he thought that Phoenix did feel that way about him. He was certain of it. So hearing Phoenix didn’t and he was completely wrong is... not good.

He’d gone so still. At the sight of it, whatever spell was holding Phoenix in its grasp broke, and he came back to reality — this wasn’t right, this wasn’t good, he had to fix this, somehow, bring things back to the way they were, “Edgeworth—”

And the sight of Miles completely freezing up and closing himself off is enough to break Phoenix free of the initial panic, because he does care a lot about Miles, and seeing him withdraw worries him.

“It’s getting late,” said Edgeworth, and only someone as experienced as Phoenix could detect the waver in his voice. “Thank you for being honest with me, Wright. I’ll talk to you later.”

The remark stung worse than a knife would, he couldn’t let it end like this. “I—”

The office door shut, none too gently. Phoenix was alone.

“... I’m sorry.”

That “thank you for being honest with me” wasn’t SUPPOSED to be a jab, of course, because Miles would prefer that Phoenix was honest than lie to him. But Phoenix did lie and that’s what bothers Phoenix the most throughout the next couple of chapters; they both value the truth so highly that lying to each other is inconceivable.

And Miles probably should have stuck around for a bit and heard Phoenix out and maybe Phoenix could have managed a half-decent explanation of “okay I don’t know what that was but this was very sudden and I’m panicking, can you give me time to process?” but if Miles stayed for much longer he probably would have started breaking down and that’s the last thing he wants to do right now, especially in front of Phoenix, so he left as soon as possible.

I think he managed to repress enough that he could get home safely, but the moment he crossed the threshold into privacy he probably had himself a good cry... curled up on the couch and watched some Steel Samurai with a tub of ice cream... but he was pretty emotionally devastated by this. It took a lot of effort for him to open up and be honest about his feelings so just being shut down like that... hurt a lot. He’d never admit it though.

anyways I also have this short bit of writing I posted a while back about Miles actually getting a hug after all this, because he really needs one.

And that’s the scene!! I think I said more than enough so I’ll end it here haha.

[mcrmadness]

Madness draws: Sketchbook things (die ärzte edition), part 2/?

I have three different die ärzte comic ideas in mind and written down - one is as old as from 2011/2012 or so but what I just never got to start drawing. I did some changes to it and was trying to find the era that would fit the story and eventually I did, but then just a couple of night ago I had this eureka moment and saw the colors so vividly in my head that I just had to change the era one more time.

Today (=tonight) I tried to practice those a little - shorter hair is always more difficult to draw and I needed and still need to figure out how to draw Bela’s short hair so that it doesn’t look like a Farin copy with a different hair color. I also just HAD TO test out the coolored pencils and see if I could find some colors or color combinations that would match the reality.

Here’s what I came up with:

And GOSH I hated looking for the colors and especially then afterwards trying to see how the colors really are because they look SO different in every lighting and I don’t know which light to trust! This file is color corrected because the scanner had the reds SOOOO off! I’m so not gonna enjoy scanning the final comic whenever I get to that far with it. So far there is just a very simple stick figure storyboard with a dialog written down.

The bottom part of the page tho? As you can see, I sometimes really struggle with the faces. I don’t know what it is but it’s really frustrating sometimes to do these sketches because they almost never are successfull. I legit don’t know if it’s just the sketchbook’s paper matrial or what but no pen seems to really do what I tell them to do. Mechanical pencils are so sharp they get stuck, fineliners are laggy ebcause the paper makes them slow, and regular pencils or a graphite pencil make way too thick lines. I can almost never get these sketches look normal. And when I fall into that cycle when a portition after portition just looks weird and I just repeat the same mistakes over and over again, I sometimes try to refresh my brain by switching to my non-dominant aka left hand. The lines it does are more carefree and just... more free overall and because I cannot fully control the fine motor skills (yet), I also cannot pay too much attention to every detail and the mistakes won’t go into the muscle memory when it’s still trying to memorize the stuff it’s supposed to do.

I’ll put a zoomed in version of the two Farins here (the sketchbook is A4 so this is probably very close to real life size too?) because Tumblr likes resizing images a bit too much:

I have to say that I am very much surprised at the Farin on the right. I drew that one the first and then moved to the left - there I could not lean my hand against anything so the lines are more messy. Writing I have done with left hand before too because it’s fun. And because I have such heavy hands, writing a lot makes my right hand/palm really hurt and I sometimes use left just to let the right rest a bit. Anyhow, coloring nor shadowing I had never even tried with the left and honestly, the colors on those two Farins look almost identical to what my right hand does. I think that was really good for my brain since it was not too precise work but it just got to handle the colored pencils and try to get used to how they move when you use them for coloring. I even tried doing my signature and I can’t really do it even with the right if I think of it, so that is actually pretty good :D

So, that’s for tonight’s practices. I think the colors are quite okay but still have to try them on the paper I use with the comics since its color might be a bit whiter from the sketchbook’s paper + its material is different so also the colored pencils will work differently on it. I still need to practice their hairs more and look at photos as I need to find certain little details from them that I can use in my comics as the key features of them. Their faces already look a little different, but I still want to avoid makin Bela’s hair look like Farin’s. Even tho now as I was browsing photos, they actually had very similar haircuts during that era. I have just never noticed that before because you just pay attention to things so differently when you need to look at things from the point of view of an artist :D

And now it’s great time to go to sleep. (I’ll schedule this post so hopefully I’m already sleeping when this gets posted, because now it’s 6am and Tumblr is quiet for some time now.)

[bluepluto03]

mcu spiderman rewrite/au i may or may not do

ok so first quick disclaimer! i do not hate the mcu spider man movies in any way!! i actually enjoy them quite a bit and have seen homecoming like 4 times! and i absolutely adore all the actors in the movies, especially tom, zendaya, and jacob 

but the problem w/ the mcu spiderman movies is,,, they’re just not spiderman. at least from a writing/thematic perspective, which sucks bc so much other stuff about them is great! like tom holland is the perfect peter parker, which is why it seems so close to being right, but with the way the script is actually written... it’s just. not spider-man. 

i feel the need to explain all this/my problems w/ the movies b4 i get into the actuall au idea/plot, so please bear with me for a sec

for context, I’ve loved spiderman my whole life. i’d watch the cartoons when i was younger, and then went back and watched them all again when i was a bit older and figured out how to pirate stuff lol. i didn’t really know how to get into the comics, so i just kinda read wikis and got second-hand info from fanfics and the other movies

to me, spiderman, (at least, peter parker spiderman,) was always about like... a kid, who saw the world was broken and fixed it because he could. he had the power to fix stuff, so he did. 

as a kid w/ mental illness and a not so great home life... that was something really really important to me. to see another kid out there, who’s been through some shit, but finally has the power to make stuff better, so he is! and it would make me think, maybe i can change stuff for the better, someday, if i just get my chance

but,,,,, the problem is mcu peter parker isn’t that. 

instead of becoming spiderman bc he knows there’s bad in the world and wants to fix it, suddenly his motivation is impressing tony stark?? and don’t get me wrong i don’t hate tony, but the way they wrote his and peter’s relationship basically trapped peter. he could no longer be his own hero, bc he was tony’s successor. and that's never who peter parker’s spiderman was?? he was never a follower, he was a trendsetter. he didn’t become spiderman for approval, hell he had dozens of newspapers constantly slandering him. 

honestly the following in someone else’s footsteps thing was always a miles morales thing. he had to step up to the plate and fill the shoes of a spiderman who had already existed for years and was beloved by the whole city. obviously thats not all he is and simplifying his character to that is incredibly obtuse, but i bring it up bc tbh alot of stuff w/ mcu peter parker is just straight-up ripped off from miles morales. like how peter now goes to a fancy private school, is no longer poor (which is a huge thing w/ peter parker’s character in like every other incarnation), has a living father figure, and is bffs w/ ned, who is a straight-up rip off of miles’s best friend ganke. (for the record tho i adore ned and jacob i’m def keeping him in my rewrite,,,, also i’m glad he’s in the movie bc having a plus sized poc protagonist thats not constantly mocked is incredible) 

so, i’m complaining about all this stuff lol but ur probably wondering how exactly how i wanna fix it lol,,,, 

first, give peter an arc thats more than just..... i want tony to believe in me. my idea for that is basically a type of thing where he learns to rely on others! bc like... peter isn’t good at working w/ others lol, he’d much rather do it all himself so no one else gets hurt. (like in the andrew garfield movies where he just,,,, webs his gf to a car so she can’t run into danger lmao) 

the plot would start at a similar ish position to homecoming, though tony never recruits peter for civil war. tbh not sure if it even happened but we’ll disscuss that later

peter’s been spiderman for a few months, after a trip to oscorp left him w/ a radioactive spider bite. currently no one knows about it, and he’s doing a pretty ok job of dealing w/ everything on his own. until he takes down a big bad, lets say rhino for now, and gains a ton of publicity. after stooping a hudge disaster he’s suddenly in the limelight, and catches the attention of one norman osborn, aka the green goblin 

now, quick sidenote. green goblin is genreally seen as pretty goofy, but there are comic versions of him that are legit terrifying. if im being honest i didn’t even know about that version until i read aloneintherains fic birds eating other birds so ig thats kinda ish how i’m imagining this version of norman? though alot more composed, like the man who could someday turn into that 

so norman becomes intrested in my boy peter, and starts sending ppl after him. possibly the sinister 6, but uhh maybe not bc tbh i think this “rewrite” needs to be split into 2 “movies”/works and i might wanna save that for the hypothetical pt2 (btw if i write this it won’t b for a while cause i got other stuff going on but ig if ppl are intrested i might write some snippits/make more content for it) 

so basically the main plot is peter dealing w/ all these big bads on his own, doing ok at first but later getting really fucked up, and eventually revealing himself to ned and mj which ends up being the only way he can save the day in the end. by relying on others! yay!! 

thats it for the main plot, but don’t worry y’all we got other stuff going on too lmao 

so, for one. my boy peter is realizing he has a crush and just,,,, freaking tf out. (i have yet to decide if it’s on ned or mj. or both. sue me) the crush isn’t definitely resolved in p1, but i imagine there’d be some cute thing of him suddenly realizing and freaking out and almost revealing his powers. 

thing 2! tony stark! he is still in here, and still a mentor to peter, but in a pretty drastically different way. one, he doesn't know about peter being spiderman. he doesn't even suspect it lmao. he just gets involved bc of.... some sort of reason bc peter is so smart. do i know why just yet? no. does it matter? probably but i’m writing this pretty late after i had school all day so i’m too tired to care 

bc tony basically gives peter a real internship/mentorship type thing, peter now has access to all this tech!! and all these funds!! fucking lit!! so he changes from his pajama suit to the fancy one, tho he actually built it!! which i feel like him making his suit is a really big really important part of his character. so it doesn't really have all those random things tony added, tho peter might add stuff himself. he gets Karan as a like assistant ai as part of his internship but she never gets put into the suit

for the fist part tony plays a super minor role but like,,,, the first part is about osborn taking an intrest in him, and him confiding in ned and mj. the second part norman is become progressively more dangorus and peter has to fight him and stuff, kinda proving he is strong enough to be spiderman/be trusted to the whole world, beyond just ned and mj. also him actually getting together w/ either one or both of them bc...... bc i want that. 

oh btw idk if tony finds out or not in p2? if he does it’s either at the end or in a scene like the one w/ may bc like. please imagine the shenanigans of peter and ned (who both have high intellegence but low wisdom) in tony’s lab, obviously trying to hide the fact that peter’s spiderman. like he walks in on them and peter looks all frumpy bc he’s been trying to change real fast, and ned’s shirt is messed up bc he just stuffed the mask down the front of it, and mj is just. chilling behing them. so tony just like assumes stuff and is like....aight.... have fun.... 

oh btw the last big change that i didn’t really have anyway to insert natrually into this,,,, so remember how i said ned was kinda a ripoff of ganke? well, the writers claim he’s a “composite character” so i figured, why not give him traits from other famous spiderman side character so he actually is a composite character! 

so like,,,, throughout p1 it’s referenced that ned has a kinda dickish estranged ish dad that he hates and his mom doesn't really like but kinda forces him too... theres some mentions of his dad wanting him to transfer to a private school and being kinda rich, bur he dosen’t want to bc he knows his dad is a total dickead,,,, anyway end of the movie we find out norman osborn is ned’s dad, and ned hates him even fucking more bc it’s like bitch?? u tried to get my (maybe) bf murdered?? tf?? and its lowkey bc he can’t reveal peter’s id, but then in p2 after norman takes matters into his own hands and tries to kill peter on his own ned just fucking yells at him while the man is in jail and is like fuck u lmao 

soooo thats my really messy au idea!! i’m really tired sorry if this is hard to understand or rude! for the record i have nothing against the ppl who adore these movie’s, i just think they could be better! 

[sunflowrlouis]

HELLO! I’ve been tagged in some posts like this and they inspired me to do one of my own. Honestly, 2019 was the most shit year of my life, those close to me know how fucking hard this year has been on a very personal level. However, this made me grow as a person and learn so so many things. SO! I want to thank the people that made this year way more bearable (also pls enjoy my paint-made header, i worked really hard on it skfjfv) (i didn’t)

im gonna put this under a read more bc i talk too much k, sorry

@emohl - MERY! We started off this year by going to eat tacos and never looking back. It’s honestly hard for me to believe its only been one year of knowing each other? It feels like you’ve been by my side for my whole life. There’s so many things to thank you for. Thank you for spoiling me rotten every time we go out, for always listening to me whether its me complaining or gushing about my crush or just talking shit bc its fun. Thank you for cheering me on always. Specially in the moments where i want to give up, you’re always there believing I can do it. You’ve become one of my greatest bestest friends in the whole world, and I hope 2020 brings us soooo many more adventures (I know it will) and I can keep on making you laugh for lots and lots of years. I LOVE YOU

@kissyhl - aspen, my twin flame 🥺 I? LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!! bitch i cannot believe we “met” in april, like bro what the actual fuck that’s not possible. Finding you this year has been the greatest thing ever. I never imagined I would’ve found someone so similar yet so different as me. You are my favorite person to talk to and I just :(( wanna hug you so bad. Thank you for putting up with me this year, for listening me talk on and on about my multiple crushes this year lmaoooo, thanks for all the ~advice, even though we are both dumb and will prefer to have a meltdown than follow it fjrbdn Thank you for all those playlists i harrassed you into making me hehe i love ur country ass. I hope 2020 is the year where my pit stop includes visiting you in the land of corn and nothing. Here’s to more years freaking people out bc we say the same things at the same time! YEEHAW! Count all of the stars and add one more, because thats how much i love you.

@ the loves of my LIFE dnd: @tomlinsun @canyonemoon @ltyear @rosesau @queersue @2ofusmp4 @godisalarrie @phoenixvinyl @tattooedlovers @louislegend @givemewalls @emohl @curlyhairedprince @sunflowrsix @onmeown @kissyhl where to start with y’all… honestly this year was a fucking mess for most if not all of us. through personal shit, to tumblr drama, to inner disagreements… we always have made it through, and that’s what matters, you all are the light of my life, even though i was a bit absent on the last few months of the year due to school, having the constant notifications always made me smile. i can’t thank you enough for everything. you are my best friends and i wouldnt be happier to share my life with you.

@lt2019 - pam, i know you’re not very active here anymore but i couldnt post this without mentioning you. you have no idea how much i love having you closer to home now, even though we don’t see each other as often. knowing you’re around somewhere is amazing. Thank you for encouraging me into doing cray things such as driving all the way to the city to see our boys in the middle of the week. can’t wait to make more memories with you, i love you so so so much!

@nauticallyrics - LIZ! reconnecting with you this year has been… incredible! you’re one of the very first friends i made in this website and i love that we found each other again! I love you! maybe 2020 will bring me to prague to visit you! who knows!

@niallacoustic - jeanne! i know you’re not as active here anymore either but i have to mention you. getting to know you this year has meant everything. i love how we can talk about everything and not get bored. thank you for always cheering on me and sending me pics of bubble kdfjn i hope we get to hang out and buy tons of plushies next year!! I know that all your dreams are gonna come true bc you deserve the world. you are a great person and an even better friend. i love you to the moon and back

@ larries en mexico gc! - @angelharry @emohl @half-lightl @justlarryokk @fforever-dreaming @nouies @rainbowscouple we’ve just started getting to know each other but i already love you all! la neta no sé por qué les escribo en ingles pero bueno, me hacen reír muchisimo y no puedo esperar para conocernos y ver a Louis en Mayo🥺 (y comer muchas chacharas como tamales fritos) you all deserve the world!

if you are reading this, first of all thank you and if we’re mutuals pls know i appreciate you for putting content on my dash! here’s to more 1d content for the next decade.

love you lots,

mari

ps. i still love cheese

[gwisingegooli]

reflection on my relationship time!

so its been like. three months since we’ve been officially dating. i love him. he makes me soooo happy. i actually think about him a lot and talking to him is my favorite.

however! long distance still sometimes brings up similar issues. i just fall in love so easily and so fast and i dont have any discipline yet. i just want to pursue all the lil heart flutters i feel.

but i remember nathan and i would honestly never want to hurt him ever. i saw how it made him feel before we started dating if i pursued other people, and i would never want to make him feel that way ever.

however i can’t help feeling the same reservations come up. while i could happily spend all day with him, when we are apart like this the same things float up. being very honest, i’m not sure if we really will last forever, although for now i’m committed to staying with him and investing in this relationship.

our sex life is good bc we have a deep, special, meaningful love together. we have such a soft, caring, happy love. but in terms of raw sexiness i think my type is slightly different. this isn’t that big of an issue, but i think it’s linked to how i really like hunky tall asian guys. and i’ve NEVER DATED ONE!! god dammit dude. bummer.

also same issues as before. while he understands me and supports me so well, to a soul mate level, and i for him, i think i still look for more in certain ways. someone who’s a little faster, does a few less annoying things he does. he’s actively changing and adjusting to be better for me but this is still a reservation i hold.

i think these are the only two things for now. ultimately you have to feel like your bae is the coolest dude on earth. and when i’m far away, or since he feels secure with me and doesn’t “act” in a cool way, i sometimes don’t feel that way. i wonder if i’d like someone more charismatic or cool.. but i also remember the first few times i met him i thought he was really cool. and cool is such a subjective changing thing. maybe i should bring this up (obviously worded in a way that wouldn’t be offensive or attack his identity).

at the same time there’s definitely some aesthetics that i will always think are cool as fuck forever and ever. and sure those things are all hard work and behind the scenes aren’t as effortless, but it’s definitely possible. i love him but i’m also looking for that kind of ultimate aesthetic/way of expression that just makes me super passionate forever.

we’ll see. right now it’s so early. and i realize for me love is sparkly special understanding and fun. which is why i fall in love so easily, everything’s like that in the beginning, especially w me. i’m so friendly and eager, everything’s going to seem sparkly and fun. but ultimately i do need to make choices, and then commit to them.

i also am not afraid of my feelings though. cause i need to be honest with them. it’s my actions i will be judged on. i don’t think i can change my idea of what love is. i hope i can find a lasting love.