#id just wanna see if they do anything.... | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

just-spacetrash · 1 month ago

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#this is just gonna be me complaining about uni work but i gotta get it out somewhere #but like im actually losing my mindd about this essay im like so scatterbrained #i cant focus at all ive tried putting my phone away and playing music and not playing music and everything #and its just. my brain refuses #i literally just need to write words it doesnt have to be good it doesnt even have to be decent but just. i cant for no reason #i cant???? why cant i this is so annoying #i still have almost 4 hours but christ alive #maybe this year ill finally try to do something about a diagnosis or smth #id just wanna try if the meds do anything you know? like so far ive gotten by but its such an agony for no reason all the time #id just wanna see if they do anything....#my post #literally just typing this so i can avoid typing my essay for a little while. whatever #also how cute is that laptop emoji i dont remember seeing it before

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doomedclockworkdotmp3 · 3 months ago

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i didnt write my essay for this 👍👍

im so festive with my red and green color combos n whatnot

#my art #digital art #digital painting #fanart #resident evil 7 #ethan winters #i still cringe when i add those tags. i hope no one sees me #i have actually been drawing him constantly for days(weeks)(months) like still and yet what do i have to show for it #a whole lotta sketches and nothing FINISHED and so many ideas i havent even drawn #im like paralyzed #by the ONSLAUGHT of ideas that i wanna see so bad but if i wanna see em i gotta do them and i cant pick which one to focus on so im like #damn i guess ill just walk around my kitchen like a deranged idiot #i could say soooo much about him and then still have more to say #i find new things to say about him everytime i even think about sayin one thing #and then i never say anything #again. paralyzed.#and really do i even wanna talk about him anyways whats there to even say really like really really. NOTHING. i have nothing to say.#when you ignore all the things id love to say i have nothing to say and thats really all there is to say on the matter.#mic drop #ANYWAYS thats the post i hope im talkin to no one. unless. hiii nugget 👋👋

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oatmealcrisp-freak · 5 months ago

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"shipping saiki is aphobic because he's aroace!"

stares at you with my demiromantic asexual in a committed relationship eyes then looks at the camera like im in the office

#good thing those folks have yet to find their way into my inbox or id be at risk of embarrassing myself lol #if you wanna see more of the content you prefer...make it yourself :3 MAKE IT YOUR FUCKING SELF lol #youre so attached to the idea youll complain about it but you refuse to do anything about it even create works that you and others will sur #ly enjoy how does this even make sense #sorry for reviving this from the dead when it blessfully hasnt been a thing in the tag for a hot moment but im still irritated hahahah #seriously you know what that screams to me? virtue signalling. you wont do anything except say a few words every now and again like #the motivation starts and ends at appealing to the popular opinion. earn your brownie points. and do nothing.#what is your care made of? thoughts and prayers?#every time ive asked one of these people why they dont make the content themselves the response has been 'i shouldnt have to lol'#you shouldnt have to bully people either with your aphobic BS but look at you! aw~#yall dont wanna commit to shit you just want to tell other people how they should exist.#if you cant create for whatever reason you better be ready and willing to drop your rec list and fave artists. and i sure as shit hope your #complimenting them thoroughly.

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topicaltropic · 2 years ago

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EPISODE 8 OF THE DUNGEONS AND DADDIES GRAPHIC NOVEL IS NOW AVAILABLE FOR PRE-ORDER !

READ THE SAMPLE NOW HERE

#dndads #dungeons and daddies #i hope no one saw when i messed up queuing.#anyways um.#yeah #i only did ten pgs cuz i dont know how many ppl will see this so i dont wanna go all out #and shout out to my bestest best friends #JUST FOR REFRENCE THIS IS A JOKE BTW THIS IS MY FIRST TIME MAKING ANYTHING LIKE THIS #A graphic novel is not in fact coming you can not actually pre order. sorry. the joke is that i suddenly pull out issue 8 and your response #would be huh ??? wait wheres the other issues ??? wtd is the pre order link?? oh its fake #although i am not unlinclined to actually do a full episode but then id need to get paid for it for real

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cloudysfluffs · 1 year ago

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I love the way you drew Sam and Max in your art style! I hope you do more tk art of them (no pressure though draw what you want)

there is nothing id rather draw for you anon!!!! i LOVE making art of these two <3333333333

(dont worry, sam's got a sneaky way of escaping)

(ns//fw and/or fetish blogs please dni🙏��)

#tickle art #my art #SMAX!!!!!!!!!!#see i promised you all id draw them :p #i went through a phase in like 2021 (and again in 2022) where like. ALL i drew was art of sam getting wrecked #havent drawn these guys in ages tho!!!!!!!!! thanks for giving me an opportunity theyre genuinely some of my fave guys to doodle ever :3 #max is fine at the end btw hes just being a Drama Queen #sorry for the empty space around the images btw. i considered cropping it but i honestly just didnt feel like it lol #anyway #sam and max tickle #ler!max #lee!sam #thanks for the req anon!!!!!!!!!!!!!#snm is one of the 3 things im super into rn (the other two things being rick n morty and adventure time)#sooo......if you wanna see more of these guys or any of the guys from those listed fandoms then i would be down B)))#i mean i take reqs for anything in my fandom doc. im just more likely to do them if im super into them lol #like i have reqs for dh///mis stuff thats been sitting in my inbox for months #but i answered this in less than 24 hours #SORRY i have adhd blehh

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moeblob · 3 months ago

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Look, there's so much that I love about certain otome but I really don't finish every route every time ?? But 7'scarlet, Steam Prison, and Norn9 all got completed! So they get the rec spots!

Honorable mentions: Nightshade (ninja otome, same artist as Norn9 thus I love it even if I haven't completed every route - Switch) Period Cube (I also fully complete it and the art is very nice imo and I enjoyed it a lot but it has really bad reviews from like. everywhere I see. but here's my shill of appreciation anyway - PS Vita) Sweet Fuse (it's just really fun to yell at men for being sexist - PSP)

But genuinely, there's a lot out there! Do the research on the game before you buy them! Not all otome are for everyone.

#moe talks a lot #why the hell am i spending so much time on these answers for otome just wondering #im asking myself this constantly while drawing them #also i am a hino defender and i want to throw hands with every single reviewer for the game (that ive read)#he deserves so much more appreciation IMO but i also dont wanna fight with people about it #everyones gonna like different dudes its fine just dont call him boring ill cry #im currently playing 9 RIP that someone bought for me and its also enjoyable but i havent done AS MUCH as id like to properly rec it #but well see because oh baby those character designs #ive already adopted like .... three characters #one isnt even an LI i just have adopted her as my daughter #wait whats that me adopting a side character while calling myself a freak for side characters? no way!#you have to understand first and foremost..... i am a huge fan of supporting casts #if i told you that the local cop has a beef with a 12 year old in 7scarlet is that anything?#i actually JUST googled bc I have been talking about the kid a lot tonight and i kept saying hes 12 #and im like i actually dunno how old he is #oh my god hes actually 12 how do i do it gang

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cathalbravecog · 1 year ago

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youtube

scenecore misty back at it again!! + a speedpaint! :D

it wasn't meant to be a youtube link, but uploading the video file itself won't work, so apologies about that i know youtube links are annoying on tumblr please don't kill me </3

#it's very hard to label this design honestly - it is not exactly scene ESPECIALLY NOT the hair. however i consider scenecore different from #it and more like an aesthetic based on scene that may or may not include the culture like the music and raves and such more #leaning on internet nostalgia if anything #so id say that fits better so the adopted scenecore misty title does fit. i originally didnt wanna use that myself believe it or not #anyways hope you like this it took longer than intented as always. whoopsies #and enjoy the music in the speedpaint heehee #i didnt check it while it was rendering so if theres goofy stuff or missed recordings/skips then whoopsie @_@#flashing #bright colors #rainmaker #misty moonsoon #scenecore #toontown corporate clash #ttcc #guz art #video_guz.mp4 #abt what i said earlier tbh genuinely how i made this design i just slapped stuff i like together #i loooove putting rainbows and stars on stuff... and lots of purples #also i gotta like make a pinned post on my main so i can credit back the textures i use #if i dont forget... its like 4 am though so! yeah no not rn . also sry more tags than usual i do want ppl to see this + my usual sortin tag #Youtube

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xxplastic-cubexx · 5 months ago

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friend trying to convince me to download fortnite by saying magneto in it and ouuuugh first off dont like how she knows me like that i feel exposed but second off they better not make that bitch available again cause i will fold instantly

#xmen #snap chats #i know mysterio there. ... i really like mysterio tbh LMAO but not enough to play fortnite #only way ill be caught playing fortnite is if i can see my beautiful wife the entire time #this the same friend i was talking about the xmen movies with. if you even saw that ramble post i made #i dont think she knows how much i love magneto yet but with time. i am sure she will JVAELKJKAL #the last time i played an FPS was like. tf2 in 2014 jFALKJKLJ but id do anything for mags ....#anyway im sleeping now. im gonna be busy this week and thats annoying cause i wanna finish my silly comic :(((#i drew a whole comic just to have an excuse to draw cher|k smooching but listen the build up is important to me #plus it means i get to draw charles and erik more yk what i mean. i love me my face-focused panels ...#hopefully if i care to ill finish that later this week and we'll see what i mean but for now .... good night ....

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arriathedragon · 9 months ago

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I am screaming, sobbing, BEGGING the world to take me OUT of this STUPID body.

I am not human I am not human I am NOT person this isn't ME.

You don't UNDERSTAND I can FEEL them there are wings IN my back they are BURSTING out they are writhing against my skin and when they finally free themselves they flap and are uncomfy because this world wasn't made for them. They're ALWAYS unkept and never properly preened because I CANT TOUCH THEM.

And YOU can't see them. AND I can't see them but they're THERE BY GOD THEY ARE THERE Please I am Begging you give. Them. Back. Make them REAL. I don't want these phantom feathers these shifting wings no one can see I want to FLY I want to SOAR. I want to preen them and male a nest and protect my shiny things and sleep with them curled around me.

I feel talons at my feet and fingertips and I try, I try SO HARD to use them, to claw off this stupid flesh and rip my wings free and become M E.

But all I get is dull red marks and angry red crescents.

And the worst part? I'm here. I'm here because I can't say this in real life because either no one cares or they think I'm insane. I'm crazy. And I need to be heard and felt and for someone to SEE these feathers and claws and talons and horns so BADLY I'm on TUMBLR ranting to the public praying someone understands because no one I love will.

Dear God I need HELP SOMEONE LET ME OUT. IM BEGGING YOU.

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knifekris · 6 months ago

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every day i struggle to make choices

#i should invest into some kind of education but cant make up my mind #mostly because options suck #i cant do trades unless my body sucks less which is sad because id love to be an electrician #cant even think about getting a pilots license cuz im not passing the med cert #i think id rather die than be a med assistant actually #working clinics at all makes me nervous tbh but probably where im headed in the short term #surgical tech would be cool but i cant do a Real program while working full-time #which is what limits most of my choices #i need to find more paid training programs i guess #if i had to pick a miserable but fulfilling job id go into education itself #but the teaching profession has always been in a downward spiral esp as of late #i dont want healthcare because i hate seeing dysfunctional glorified murder machines grinding around and around endlessly #acute care sucks id rather be in an icu for function but then im depressed because our patients are always dying #it was better as a phleb but this hospital doesnt have phleb and like i said im nervous about clinics #but i need to fucking commit to outpatient phlebotomy i think :/#the most fun ive had at a job ever #i wish i had more widely applicable skills but i cant be an emt/para even just for the training #because half of it is unpaid and the other half you pay for #and again #a job NOTORIOUS for being exhausting dangerous and traumatizing #if i was 17 again and wasnt escaping the tar pit of my mother id go for an english degree and i wouldnt even regret it #thinking about school in terms of a job i have to have forever vs for the sake of learning is so different #id like to know everything. i wanna read and write forever. and do research and have real technical skills that help people #im still riding off of the high of getting 5 ccs off of an oncology patient who desperately needed a port #they were able to run like seven tests off of it #i had to use a couple ped tubes #she only had to get poked Once and barely noticed it bc the doc team came in and im so happy i made her admission that muvh easier #labs are so miserable #checking back on the blood and seeing all of the results came through made me more pleased than anything else in the world

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faaun · 11 months ago

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pls i need to provide updates

#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year #and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire #and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f #friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl #acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what #are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and #friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me!#LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after #everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to #invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me #i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother #and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids #so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo #any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷‍♀️#but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd #and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk #THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date #w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a #few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay #scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK #like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl #like is that even doable #but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much #.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us #god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x #but it would be soooo funny #I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed #popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x #i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like #its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe

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liquidstar · 11 months ago

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a friend who'd wait :)

#im posting this very late because i was sort of weary of how it came out and ended up messing w it until it was like 4am oops.#and i have plans tmrw so... oh well! i did my best and ill put it out while i can!#and i tried to make the scene match barnard's colors lol #finn's ocs #finn's art #i know i said id do more sillay stuff with the simpler screentone only style but i had a couple more of these in me #and this is the first piece im making thats like an actual part of the story too rather than just setting stuff for fun #i wanna write something to go with it too but for now ill just sort of briefly explain the context in the tags here:#barnard has a pretty bad case of OCD and his compulsions have made it difficult to make friends in the past #he was never outright bullied or anything but people just didnt really have the patience to deal with it #he has compulsions that include stuff like walking through doors until it feels right and needing things to be perfectly aligned #which in group settings has lead to people having to wait for him to finish his rituals and join them #they might find it tolerable at first but eventually they grow impatient and hes just... not invited to stuff anymore #but juno is a newer member of the guild who ends up frequenting the same library. hes also kinda a little weird #and they dont become fast friends or anything but just sort of naturally spend time in the same place #though they never plan meetups they eventually fall into a routine. around the same time theyd just both be at the library #and read next to each other. and maybe talk a bit. and eventually they end up walking back to the guildhall together #since theyre going to the same place after all. and juno always waits for barnard outside the door #eventually barnard asks if this bothers him. juno kinda just tells him 'of course it does' without any malice or anything. just a statement #barnard is surprised and apologizes and juno says not to. but the next day juno doesnt show up at the usual time.#barnard assumes hes committed somekinda more by bringing it up. he ends up staying there late reading to get his mind off it & not ruminate #but when he leaves juno is in fact still waiting for him down the hall (see pic) having collected a bunch of books literally abt ocd #he fell asleep bc barnard stayed later than expected. and hes an eepy guy generally. and also one very bad at expressing himself #but now barnard gets that juno's 'of course it [bothers me]' had the implication of 'but its worth it' which no friend has previously done.#and from the interaction juno was also able to understand that this isn't something barnard just does for the hell of it so. he studies.#and checks a bunch of stuff out because he thinks it could help his friend too (theres ocd workbooks and such- i remember working w them)#and thats the point where they became more ''friends'' than ''pleasant library acquaintances''#from there on they also do get into juno's problems. whole other bag of worms. but this specific scene is more about bernard from his pov #sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied </3 #but compared to the whole sequence im picturing its brief so shhh

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applescabs · 4 months ago

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happy birthday to me i celebrated by looking at my favourite sequence of images in the world and crying over it at half past midnight.

#im. 24 now.#appleyaps #gonna be honest with you guys idk where the fuck my life is heading atm.#but if this manga taught me anything its that i have to keep making choices in order to achieve my own happiness.#ive been making strides... im now exclusively using the men's toilets wherever i go.#and im working on getting a professional diagnosis so i can go on hrt... but the waiting lists are so long.#i took the transfer but now it turns out i still have to wait longer... even though i was promised help quickly.#i dont know how much longer i can take this though. being uncomfortable with myself. im sick of it. i just wanna live.#theres so many things id like to do. but my body and my voice are holding me back from it.#my mom and her boyfriend know now. but my mom doesnt understand and has never referred to me as a woman as much as she does now.#at least everyone at school uses he/him for me now. i was finally assertive about it in my new class #and everyone there calls me teddie. though i'd like people to use tom for me as well. my friends do.#i just need to be even more assertive from now on. im working on it. im doing my best. i wanna live.#at least i have lots to look forward too. thats whats keeping me going honestly. and my friends.#the hope that one day i get to look in the mirror and finally see myself. i want to believe that it can happen. i need it to happen.

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opens-up-4-nobody · 5 months ago

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...

#bleh. i need half the country to pls stop being on fire. id like to go out and run pls. but its so smokey i can barely see the mountain #i live near :-/ also im just tired and frustrated. its incredible how quickly i vasilate between #things r going well. i should stay in my program and work with cyanos forever. to no no no im not cut out for this. i gotta leave. to yay #let me throw myself head first into consuming every second of my life with working. but only on the things that dont require me to think #which is y im not cut out for this and should be bannished to a world of only doing lab work and following instructions #also i have an screening interview monday for an R0DBT group. so i might b going to control freak classes #assuming i cant convince the lady that im not fit for thr class. which obviously i am bc im my therapist listed the ppl who r #usually put into r0dbt and i was like hm im a lot of those things. but also its 2hrs every week and thats a lot of time. and i feel like im #already on the path away from violently structuring my life specifically bc ive done so much damage #ugh. also i have ridiculously high self standards but i only do anything halfway bc i cant fail if i never try 100%.#so im like a fake control freak. or rather i cant even fully commit to being controlling. im lazy and i dont have the drive.#which almost makes it worse bc im stading at this threshold of control where it destroys me but never actually succeeds in being a perfect #thing. which is def a distorted way to think about it but there u go. ugh. im just tired and my arm hurts too much to draw bc #im older and older everyday. and i dont wanna read papers. i dont wanna grade or work on my presentation. i didn't want to spend 3.5 hrs #doing transfers this morning. and my mom's been dead for 6months and 3 days now. and i still dont kno where ill be a year from now #unrelated

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roseluwakcoffee · 7 months ago

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Honestly worst part abt Kyoko being my fav is team danganronpa also likes her so she has an actual backstory and probably a million details abt her life I don’t know yet bc I haven’t finished dr kirigiri so every time I wanna talk abt her I Know im missing context and it feels illegal

#text #this is why that celes analysis post was written yrs ago #believe me id do the same for kyoko but is there anything to analyze when it’s all written out??#although i do wanna read dr kirigiri and see if any of it affects her behavior in dr1 in some way #I just have to finish it dear god why are tasks so difficult #kyoko kirigiri

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marsixm · 8 months ago

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ive actually put myself in so many situations and seem to come out doing socially well, youd think at some point i could get it in my head im not irredeemably bad

#that post about dysphoria like ‘u feel like ur covered in slime and people will eventually see the rot’ rly truly hits it #idek if its dysphoria or autism or what at this point #maybe its everything #but shit #ive stayed at hostels and hung out with and chatted w complete strangers #i went back to my hs reunion this week and actually hung out w people i thought didnt fw me anymore #my coworkers generally seem to like me- its felt rare when one didnt which is a shocking percentage #ive maintained friendships with my core group of friends despite living w them for over a year (u know how that can go) and not #being able to participate in like half the activities they do (sex parties i dont wanna attend or im busy at work)#made internet friends. believe it or not there was a time as a teen i thought id never be able to do that!#shit bitch even the guy i like who i constantly worry secretly hates me #and i constantly worry only puts up with me etc #yeah he doesnt always seem to let me in much but he barely lets anyone in?#comparatively he does seem to let me in a lot #i really have to remember to put things in perspective sometimes #just bc im not in my holmes/watson era or facetiming someone all day doesnt mean im a lonely loser……. smh #there was once a time i had no irl friends. I CHANGED THAT. I DID THAT. i can do anything

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