#i'm fucking trying
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I wrote a Dune-aesthetic-esque futuristic reimagining of a classic literary tale. But it has a wlw love story at the core. High concept. Big budget. Will it ever get made? Let's find out...
#give me time though#tbd#worth a shot#lets see#filmmaking#screenwriting#screenwriter#hollywood#wlw#sapphic#lgbtq#i'm fucking trying
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trying to write ch17 is like holding a brownie in front of a child and telling them to go eat pasta first. Like ok sure, pasta can be good if it's not time for dessert. I want to go write about a badass 19 year old with crippling self-worth issues whose annoying deity roommate keeps following him around and won't leave him alone to die. like. why should i write about a bunch of found family members trying to recuperate from bearing witness to the most horrifying boss fight, like, ever, while other pieces across time and space are being set into motion? Why should I?
it's my damn brownie, i want it now
#i'm fucking trying#i love these guys but dammit i want to go write sky#and do chapter summaries#and maybe write fluff#cuz im fucking tired#brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr#my s&a brain is simultaneously happening and not happening what is this#what is this devilry#why can i not brain properly rn#i wish to brain#chicken scratch#smoke & ashes
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a real interaction i just had with a patient:
"Is there anything else I can help you with?" "No." "Alrightie, I hope you have a great rest of your day!" "I won't." "...oooooookay, goodbye!"
#i know it's the weather that's making them all be such massive cunts today but jesus christ#i'm fucking trying
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#RAGEBOOK#sadness#pain#rage#despair#trauma#ptsd#loneliness#art#drawing#I'M FUCKING TRYING#I'M TRYING
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the audacity of the official dc account to even post this 😭
#red hood#jason todd#jason peter todd#dc comics#jason todd x reader#red hood x reader#jason todd x reader smut#jason todd smut#stardust:txt#i can fix him#I'm not trying to fix him I'm trying to fuck him#1k#2k#3k#4k#5k#6k#7k#8k#9k#10k#11k#12k#13k#14k#15k
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Ask me how my jobsearch is going and I will show you how I'm digging out a full chunk in minecraft
#dont like the answer then dont ask#i need more unhinged answers to add to my list im tired#mine#unemployment#I'm fucking TRYING
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School said there's no way to accommodate for tardies and so now I'm trying to convince myself that I shouldn't go kill myself to escape from the guilt and never-ending struggle of being on time
#I fucking go to school#which is more than most people do#but if I'm ten minutes late I'm at risk for disciplinary action#because they don't give a fuck that I'm disabled#I go to class to study despite knowing they'll mark me absent and every day I resist the urge to jump off the third floor balcony#I'm fucking trying#this is my best and they call it misbehaving
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#yatharil rants#personal#sometimes my family makes it really hard#to be happy with life#I'm fucking trying#but it's never enough#i sometimes wish#i could have followed jacob and sky wherever the afterlife took them#I'd be happier there
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been seeing homies get deep into "the terror" and making me want to rewatch SO i spent two hours in the dead of night reading the wiki/the subreddit/other linked articles and like. one of those articles was deadass fucked up
there was a woman who spoke inuktitut who was writing a book containing a lot of inuit oral histories, and in nunavut she was able to hear passed-down recollections of when survivors from the franklin expedition were passing through
and like. i can't imagine being an inuit family/group, knowing that europeans exist but having never seen them, seeing 8-9 shambling, blue-skinned, cold-to-the-touch out-of-their-minds white men come wandering by. they invited the men inside their igloos for warmth, for food, to be hospitable. the men refused to eat, refused to speak, and when trade was offered, clutched their possessions close and refused to entertain the idea of trade. this was, offputting, to say the least. the group set them up in their own igloo, with their own fire, and left three whole seals for them to eat. and then they fled cause what the FUCK get out of there. they came back in a few days to check on the strangers. the three seals were completely untouched, while all of the men had killed and eaten each other
i mean. fuck dude. there are obviously pretty dark angles to view the franklin expedition from– honestly can't think of a good angle, it's pure colonialism and british exceptionalism– but that specific interaction, that inuit group who were living lives as normal until a dozen fucking walking dead showed up and did cannibalism. no wonder that story got passed down, i'd be shitting my pants if i saw that
#I will try to find a link to the article again tomorrow but I'm on 4 hours of sleep rn#On account of spending 2 hours reading about The Terror on a work night#So the fact checking will have to wait. But holy fuck dude#The Terror
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I'm still pretty new to chess, can anyone tell me what I'm supposed to do if my opponent plays the Eight Fucking Bears opening? I'm really having trouble.
#mtg#magic the gathering#eight fucking bears#inscryption#chess#Every time I try to go first (because I'm the white side) he goes TOO FAST. TOO SOON. and playes eight fucking bears with flash#reach and trample#and i don't know what to do about it#my dumb chess ideas#1k#2k#3k#4k#5k#8k#10k#15k#20k#25k#30k#40k#50k#60k
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The fanfictions are infecting me with brainrot oh my god have some au doodles before I explode
#the fanon here hits different idk#like?? why is there so much vivisection#danny phantom#danny phantom fanart#danny fenton#danny fenton fanart#dp#dp fanart#this is like a#fully dead au#where no one knows#kind of thing#jazz fenton#bc I'm obsessed with their sibling dynamic#why are they on the roof pax#bc after Danny died jazz started stargazing as a way of feeling closer to him#fuck you#I have thoughts about this au actually#in it Jack and maddy are still trying to get rid of the ghosts but mostly as penance#bc they know the ghost portal is what killed Danny#and they want revenge#Danny's aware of this but convinced his parents wouldn't love him enough to believe him if he revealed himself as their son#jazz helps phantom without knowing he's Danny#pax art#pax doodles#pax rambling#technically#tho all the rambling is in the tags
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"karasu search how 2 cheer human up"
"karasu search difference between sad human and zoning out human"
"karasu search how long is it safe for humans to zone out for?"
(+ a longer look at each scene:)
#art#gif#obey me#this was meant to be a quick test. it was not quick. i think this is was the longest i've spent on drawing something since rolling ik#for some reason procreate keeps fucking up the colours on export and i'm too tired to figure out how to make it stop#can you tell that satan and lucifer were animated first?#funnily enough satan showing ik his book was pretty simple but lucifer walking was like. impossible. he kept turning out fucked up#i was so worn out by the end of it that everyone else's animations are way simpler#(the walk still doesn't look right but i've made peace with that.... i should've done some tutorials or smth first)#(such is my hubris: when i try to do new art things it's mainly by brute-forcing my way through it and hoping it works)#jtta ik#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#anyway i'd like to experiment more with trying to animate things in future so!! look forward to that?
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when you're part of a group with structural power over another goup, you really do gotta just learn to say "i am not exempt from 'fuck 'em' when relevant" whenever someone expresses frustration with you or people like you.
#juney.txt#like sure to protect your ego you could try to make up some axis of oppression that concievably means you're not accountable for anything#and how dare people from colonized nations tell you that you have it easier than them just because you live in the imperial core#or how dare trans women say you have it easier than them because no matter what it'll always be your word against a tranny's#or you could just learn to be a little uncomfortable for a moment#and look at the situation for a second and say#''you know what? they're right to be frustrated!''#''and it's really not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things if they're frustrated at me''#''especially if i'm being a prime example of the things they're getting frustrated about''#''i am not exempt from 'fuck 'em' when relevant''
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i will never understand how people have the heart to hate Jason even after they found out that his Ambrosia tastes like fucking sawdust. Ambrosia being tasty is like one single happy thing a demigod can have despite their tragic lives, because it reminds them of the home they once had, but lost. And Jason doesn't even have that, he doesn't even have a home to lose in the first place.
#He didn't even get the bare minimum of anything#what the fuck I'm bawling#json grace haters who make false claims about his character trying to villianize him go fuck yourselves I'm serious#genuinely y'all make so mad so DNI on my lage#hating a character is fine but outright making false claims about his actions to manipulate others into jumping on the hate train aswell??#how could you despise him with this knowledge. “because he tried replacing perc-” shut the fuck up if that's the reason#It was technically jason who was so quickly replaced in camp Jupiter after his sheer 11 years of hardwork#but oh no it's completely fine that no one in cj sent a search party after him and only jason gets the blame for landing in chb#I will never forget the part of the fandom who tried to convince me that Jason was a bad character who deserved to die.#pjo#pjo fandom#percy jackson#pjo hoo#pjo series#jason grace#pjo hoo toa#annabeth chase#piper mclean#leo valdez
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kissing the trauma away
#jayvik#arcane#arcane season 2#jayce#viktor#I'm very curious to see how they continue Viktor's story; the man is a pacifist#peace personified#so to speak#against weapons of any kind#what has to happen for him to give up these principles? For him to fight when he didn’t even try to save his own life?#let's hope it's some tragic moment where he has to rescue Jayce#and goes 'fuck those principles my husband is in danger'
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learned helplessness
#shadow the hedgehog#sth#sonic the hedgehog#my art#what if his inhibitors didnt do anything would that be fucked up or what#super quick painting exercise i'm trying to get faster
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