#i'm doing a bachelor's in social care

[tiktaalic]

s1 dean: it's not gay to suck a dick or three or ten you're just making sure you're not gay

s2 dean: getting notes from my team that sometimes it is gay to suck a dick . i would like to formally announce that i never did that. and i never would.and also i'm masc. i'm masc. i'm literally masc.

s3 dean: too busy with dying to think about being gay i'm pretty sure.

s4 dean: really enjoying that cas is unaware of social norms so that dean can oscillate between preening when he teaches him how to be a man (+1 masculinity for being more of a man than cas +1 masculinity for being so much of a man that you can teach others how to do it) and. taking advantage of the no social norms thing to rationalize his OWN behavior with cas because he knows cas isn't going to call him on it not being normal which MAKES it normal because there is no one to refute that.

s5 dean: much of the same but there are now emotional stakes in play because they Are friends he is now Emotionally attached in a real way to this man he was engaging in one way gay chicken with.

s6 dean: mfw my brother tells me to be normal so i marry a woman. ratchets him all the way back to i have never liked a man and i never will.

s7 dean: very similar emotionally to endverse dean / s14 dean in my mind. kind of in the same place as s6 dean but crucially s6 dean was sad and wet and s7 dean is walled off and apathetic. attraction to men does not factor into his worldview.

s8 dean: he literally was in a foxhole with benny and got a spraytan and had a gay thing. this man begrudgingly puts one (1) rainbow ornament on his christmas tree after sending out christmas cards of him embracing another man while their gay ass dog sits at their feet. the sticking point HERE is "cas doesn't feel stuff like that".

s9 dean: We Cannot Get Into All That but. they literallyyyyyyyyy had to make cas sleep with a woman and get banished forever to sidestep The Implications. which are. dean winchester would fuck the gay angel given the FIRST opportunity. i'd probably fuck cas but my brother is dying so idrc about that rn. etc. this is a man who is conscious of his attraction to 1) men and 2) cas and WOULD act on it given the chance.

s10 dean: this is where it gets love triangle-y with crowley and cas. this is because dean DID fuck crowley and WANTS to fuck cas. textually. this is where he stands. moc dean has sex with men and doesnt care because hes normal. POST moc dean is like. the same sex attraction was a metaphor to show that i was evil and corrupted by the mark.

s11 dean: i'll be honest. i remember fuck all about season 11.

s12 dean: his mom is around which means he will not be out. this is also. iirc? where dabb gets his grubby little showrunning hands on things. which of course. means dabbification. which of COURSE. means destiel eating plain toast and raising a baby domestically. which. of course. translates to dean using cas as a girlfriend stand in. which. imo. is reflected in dean's mindset. like s12 dean is aware that cas is the most important person in his life, and he is not interested in deviating from that formula with a woman at all.

s13 dean: gay man realizing the love of his life is dead and he never said or did anything -> gay man whose love of his life comes back so he doesnt have to grapple with the consequences of never saying anything and they can jump back into pseudo relationship.

s14 dean: this is a gay man coparenting with a gay man and telling his father that he has a family. has accepted his fate as a life long ambiguous bachelor who lives with a man and sometimes sleeps in his bed nonsexually. very much dead inside staring down the barrel of throwing himself on a grenade does not have Time to push the boundaries of his relationship.

s15 dean: too many twists and turns to get into in the stinger of a post.

[foone]

If your wife was president what would you be the First?

Good question. But the cheat answer is "I wouldn't be."

See the First Lady is a job, not just a title. She's the hostess for the White House. She plans the various social events, the dinners and the parties and such. I don't want to do that shit. (I'm an anxious nerd with autism, how many parties do you think I've been to, let alone planned?)

And there's precedent for this: there's been First Ladies where she wasn't the wife of the president, because either the president was a bachelor/widower or because she wasn't up to the task for illness or other reasons. So it's been sisters, daughters, and even nieces.

So I think my wife would pick her sister-in-law (my sister) to be the First Lady. She's nice and outgoing and funny, so she'd be a great hostess for the White House. She could put on some sweet parties.

(Although I imagine there'd be a minor fox news scandal as she greatly increases the average number of tattoos per First Lady. but it's the 90s, so who cares, that news story will be gone in a week)

Anyway to actually answer your question, I think the best answer would be to use "Host". I'd be First Host.

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Weekly Recap | July 1st-14th 2024

Work has been kicking my ass. Can't wait for my vacation! Hope you're all doing well!!

Complete

what if he's written "mine" on my upper thigh? by heartbeatdiaz/ @loserdiaz (Fanart, PWP | <1K | Explicit): “I'm gonna ride you,” Eddie says, flicking his wrist. “Okay, baby?” When Eddie straddles Buck's lap and sinks down, his eyes closed, he doesn’t fuck himself down onto Buck like he normally would— he wants to drag it out, tease his boyfriend untill he's a whimpering mess underneath him.

Sparks Fly by Inell/ @inell (Reporter Buck AU | <1K | Teen): Eddie meets his match when reporter Buck shadows the 118

Seeing Stars by Inell (Astronauts AU | <1K | Teen): Buck and Eddie are best friends who have been pining for a while when Buck finally makes a move.

when it all melts down by bucksclipboard/ @excuseme-greentea (Post-S7, Getting Together | 2K | Teen): Buck thinks a beach day is the perfect distraction from an empty house and a lack of summer plans. Eddie thinks if Buck walks out of the ocean like a Greek god one more time, he might just lose his mind. or: there’s only one cure for a frozen tongue after too much ice cream

The Moment is Here by Inell (Post-S7, Getting Together | 2K | Teen): Eddie has been in love with Buck for longer than he cares to remember but he’s been scared to jeopardize their friendship. Lucky for him, Buck is feeling brave this morning.

i'll never give you away ('cause i've already made that mistake) by Iover_of_mine (I_almost_do)/ @lover-of-mine (Post-S7, Love Confessions | 3K | General): Buck almost kissed Eddie at the bachelor party and forgot about it. Until he remembered.

this postcard tells you where we've been by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S7 | 3K | General): Eddie finds a collection of postcards Buck sent to Chris over his summer in El Paso.

pauses, then says you're my best friend (you knew what it was) by instantcaramel/ @buddiekinard (Social Media Fic, Post-S7 | 4K | General): buck drags eddie to a taylor swift concert. wackiness ensues.

Cursebreaker by Inell/ @inell (Post-S7, First Date | 4K | Teen): Buck is nervous about his apparent dating curse ruining his first date with Eddie. Lucky for him, Eddie doesn’t believe in curses.

A Love As True As Mine by Inell (Post-7x10: All Fall Down, Getting Together | 4K | Teen): After Buck gets injured during a call, he overcomes some personal issues and ideas of love with Eddie’s help.

One Look at You by Inell (Post-S7, Getting Together | 4K | Teen): Eddie and Buck are enjoying a night out when lines get blurred and feelings are finally admitted.

And There You Were by Inell (Post-S7, Getting Together, Fluff | 4K | Teen): After admitting their feelings for each other and spending the night together, Eddie wakes up to find Buck in the kitchen and decides to distract him. 

I Can See Clearly Now by Inell (Post-S7, Getting Together | 5K | Teen): During a simple call, Buck finds himself locked in a lab after a possible exposure with Eddie and the rest of his team on the other side of the glass doors.

Pumpkin by JJK/ @trenchcoatsandtimetravel (Canon Divergent, Dad Buck | 5K | General): “You were just telling us about your dog, Pumpkin. Three years old. You’re taking her to the park this weekend?” And, oh. Buck wanted to laugh. Hen thought Pumpkin was a dog. He did laugh; loud and wheezing. “Right, you’re right. Pumpkin. How could I forget?” Buck wiped a tear from his eye. He didn’t know why it was so funny, maybe he had bumped his head a little, but for some reason, Hen mistaking his three-year-old daughter for a dog was just about the funniest thing he’d ever heard.

🔥 bark like you want it by colonoscopys/ @colonoscopys (Soulmates AU, Crack | 7K | General): The first time Eddie Diaz hears his soulmate’s voice, he hears him say Damn, that’s a nice ass.

🔥 the book of love by colonoscopys (Time Loop, Getting Together | 8K | General): It was a pretty regular day. He had an eight hour shift the day before, slept in a little bit, ate dry toast and drank a black coffee before dropping Chris off at physical therapy for an hour. If he had known he was gonna die, he would have sprung for the hashbrowns in the freezer.

🔥 trying hard not to act a fool by arcanaphora (Didn't Know They Were Dating, Post-S7 | 10K | Teen): Or: 5 times Eddie jokes to Buck about marrying him + 1 time where Buck doesn't think it's very funny anymore

The heat of the moment by JamesPearce911/ @diazsdimples (PWP | 10K | Explicit): Tired and frustrated after a long shift, Buck and Eddie take an impromptu trip to the sauna. Only problem is, it's a nude sauna, which Buck didn't notice when he booked them in. Thankfully the boys handle the slip up gracefully, and possible break a few public sex laws in the process.

What if this storm ends? by JJK / @trenchcoatsandtimetravel (Post-6x12: Recovery, Getting Together | 11K | Teen): After the lightning strike, Buck grapples with the fact that he's still alive, that he's hopelessly in love with Eddie, and that more than anything he wishes Eddie and Christopher could be his family. Too bad Eddie doesn't feel the same way, right? But then Buck chaperones Christopher's school trip and an injury shakes things up.

🔥 if i said you could never touch me by marviless/ @marviless (Established Buddie | 15K | Mature): “Buck. What’s wrong?” Buck closes his eyes, then blinks them open. “Nothing,” he says, because he doesn’t know how to tell the truth. He doesn’t know what the truth even is. “Everything’s, uh—everything’s fine. I just—” he chews on his lip. “I was just thinking that, uh, maybe we shouldn’t go any further tonight? You know, not with Christopher in the house.”

What is Love For $2000? by fayevian/ @fayevian (Canon Divergent, Jeopardy Contestant!Buck | 17K | Mature): One night when Eddie can't sleep, he discovers the hottest Jeopardy contestant of all time (objectively). With the "help" of his team and his fairly good working knowledge of Twitter, they devise a plan to get Evan (from Jeopardy) to slide into Eddie's DMs. It works surprisingly well.

🔥 keeping score by arcanaphora (Post-S7, Fake Relationship | 23K | Mature): After getting dumped, Buck is left with two tickets to a weeklong cruise. Eddie steps in to support a friend in need, but complications arise when his friend becomes his fake husband. All's fair in love, war, and trivia.

🔥 Steal My Sunshine by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Altered Memories | 30K | Mature): Memories hazy and unreliable, Eddie Diaz wakes up every morning in a house at the end of a cul de sac, goes to his office job at a petroleum engineering company, and comes home to his wife and son. But something is missing, and the more Eddie begins to put the pieces together, the stranger the predicament he finds himself in. 

🔥Anywhere I Want, Just Not Home series by Daisies_and_Briars

Pennsylvania Under Me (Future Fic, Buckley Family | 22K | Teen): When unexpected circumstances require Buck to travel back to Hershey for the first time in over a decade, Eddie and Chris are right by his side. A Lot Like You (Future Fic, Buck&Bobby | 14K | General): The dynamics between everyone change when Buck and Eddie have another child and Bobby moves on from the 118. I Hold It Like a Grudge (Buck&Maddie, Future Fic | 11K | Teen): Buck and Maddie come into unexpected and unwanted conflict when their parents meet Buck's son for the first time, by surprise, when he is under Maddie's care.

WIP

The Smutty Ones by Tizniz/ @tizniz (PWP | 56/? | 23K | Explicit): A collection of smutty Buddie drabbles.

E & E: A Buddie Drabble Collection by Tizniz (Prompt fic | 105/? | 22K | General): A collection of drabbles for Buck and Eddie.

It's Me That He's Always Choosing by I_still_dont_understand_13/ @dangerpronebuddie (Prompt fic | 20/? | 8K | Explicit): A collection of smut prompts originally posted on tumblr.

🔥 boys, when my baby found me by nondz (pinkjook) (Post-S7, Presumed Dead Eddie | 2/3 | 17K | Explicit): “It just feels… I don’t know. I feel like I’m back to being an old version of me. Like I’m— fucking— Buck 2.0 again. I can’t be good to him if I’m Buck 2.0. I know that.” Eddie frowns. “I first met you when you were Buck 2.0. And you were good to me.” Or: three months later, things are mostly back to normal. And then there's an accident.

🔥 Held Up a Lightning Rod (Wonder Why I'm Struck) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Not A Firefighter Eddie, Sugar Baby Buck | 10/22 | 46K | Explicit): When Eddie Diaz stumbles his way into money, he finds himself one of the most eligible bachelors in Los Angeles - to his dismay. He needs a way to get people off his back without confessing his messy marital situation, and Shannon's still not answering his calls, so he caves to a friend's suggestion: hire someone to pretend to be his partner. Enter Evan "Buck" Buckley: sugar baby, fire fighter, and the man about to turn Eddie's world upside down.

🔥 If You Can Make the Music by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, | 3/5 | 7K | Mature): Spin-off Sequel to Evan Buckley & the Coma-Verse of Madness - Chapter 5 (Seaside): A year after a whirlwind two week love affair with bartender Buck in Galveston, Texas, Eddie Diaz finds himself coincidentally relocating to the area. But when he attempts to reconnect with Buck, he's in for an unfortunate surprise. (Part 3 of Coma-Verse)

🔥 you're almost home (i've been waiting for you to come in) by sibylsleaves/ @sibylsleaves (Post-S5, Canon Divergent - Roommates, Getting Together | 3/5 | 18K | Mature): Buck moves in. Eddie comes out. Things get a little messy.

🔥 Long Death by Daisies_and_Briars (Post-S7, Vampire AU | 5/10 | 17K | Explicit): In the summer of 2024, a never before seen form of vampirism breaks out in Los Angeles. Just as Eddie is about to get his son back. Six months later, Buck's life is permanently changed.

🔥 Any Other Way by Daisies_and_Briars (Canon Divergent, S2 | 14/19 | 71K | Mature): In a switcheroo alternate universe, Buck spends young adulthood in the military, while Eddie, who has no idea Christopher exists, spends his twenties messing around, finally enjoying freedom away from his family’s expectations. When they both end up in Los Angeles, at the 118, some things are different, and others will be the same in any universe.

🔥 Things We're All Too Young to Know by Daisies_and_Briar (Canon S1-S6, Divergent Post-S6 | 130/? | 408K | Mature): This is a love story. Even if it doesn’t always look like it. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it. A look back on Eddie and Buck's lives up to now, and what led them to each other, interpreted from the current 9-1-1 canon.

[crsssie]

calling it love, but this isn't falling

word count: 1.6k

warnings: non explicit smut (one paragraph)

summary: huh. not kid anymore

If you had to describe Keegan, it'd be something along the lines of "an old man's soul stuck in a young man's body" or something adjacent.

You had watched him in high school — three years above you, captain of the basketball team, president of the social services club, set to join the military after graduation, and you had hung out in his friend group by pure chance. A senior had adopted you as a freshman, and you had been in the group, watching Keegan since.

Pretty blues. He has striking blue eyes — cold when out playing on the court, yet somehow warm when he was talking to his friends. He always struck you as that kind of person. He'd suit the battlefield. You know? But the truth was, you read stories about the battlefield and its repercussions, and you were certain that by the time that Keegan was in the military, he'd be gone and dead and maybe blown up in the Middle East all for the sake of some oil. The people who die in war are expendable at the hands of the government, so when the entire group had waved goodbye to him at his enlistment, you had tucked him a small four-leaf clover into his palm, telling him to tuck it into his hat so that at the very least, he would not be shot through the skull.

"You sure care about me, kid."

"I'm your friend. It's a given. Good luck, Keegan."

"I'll be back. Promise."

You're graduating your bachelor's degree when Keegan comes back from the war. Alive, yes. Shell-shocked, yes. It's hard to describe PTSD because it's not just the clattering and loud noises. It's also the silence that comes with it, and when you spot Keegan with all of your high school friends at your graduation, your heart stops in your chest because that's not Keegan. That's the shell of him. It's hard to even begin to describe just who he is now.

"Congrats on the degree, kid." He hums, handing back the same four-leaf clover, and you start crying.

You tell everyone it's just because you're happy to be done and to be able to see Keegan, but it's far from the truth.

Keegan ends up at the same university that you go to grad school for.

You spot him at orientation, and you stick around him, watching as you point him through everything that he needs to know, and you blink and blink and blink and blink at him until you're blinking out tears and you feel like a child all over again. You wonder if you should just tell Keegan that maybe being around him is bad for your health and eyes, but you decide against it.

You wipe at your tears and tell him you're just being sentimental. Now you're telling him the ropes to handling certain situations when he was the one doing that back in high school.

"Nothing to get sentimental over." Keegan hums, offering you a pack of napkins from his pocket as you sniffle.

"Fuck you."

"Apartment's open."

You punch him in the arm for it.

Keegan is good at staying quiet. He's always been. Despite the unofficial acknowledgment that he was the leader in the high school friend group, he had always been quiet. Talked with his eyes. You stare into his eyes when he raises a brow at the rest of the group, and you learn to read him just based off of an expression. An older brother to anyone and everyone. Yet, despite it all, you never quite learned too much about him. A family crowded in much secrecy. The stability in his personality was rare in a broken house, so you always assumed that he had just been part of a white picket fence home.

He's always been the type to take care of you.

You find it strange that you're teaching him what drinks to touch and not, and you hand him a can of beer, grabbing a shot for yourself, and shotgunning a soda as a chaser. You wipe your mouth of the sugar as Keegan stares, bursting into laughter when your raise a brow at him and offer the rest of the drink to him.

"That's unsanitary, kid."

"Can't die from a little metal poisoning." You lick your lips, tossing the rest of it as you hum. "Most people pregame at home, but since we met up, I don't expect you to have done anything."

"Always full of surprises, eh?"

"Have to be. What's a little fun?" You hum. "We can bus home or call a cab later. See you in a bit!"

You rush into the crowd to disappear.

It's a little unfair, though. You don't ever think Keegan's thought too much about you while you had always looked up to him, so it feels a little strange for you to be on top of him, sunk down on him, legs flush against his hips as your fingers wrap around his neck, your brows furrowed as you breathe in and out. He's pretty like this, blues hazy as you stare down at him, room suddenly too small, breath suddenly too short. It's unfair that you get to see him like this, you think. You can name at least five other people who used to be in your friend group who had a crush on him. Unfair, unfair, unfair. Your lips press to his collar, lipgloss smearing on the white of his skin, and you wonder if he's going to forget all of this in the morning.

You don't know if you want him to.

You wake to Keegan in bed with an arm around your waist, face nestled into your chest.

Keegan wakes to an empty bed and pills on his nightstand.

You pretend it didn't happen. As long as Keegan doesn't bring it up, you don't either. Yet, you stick around for breakfast, handing him his usual order and morning coffee, a cup of tea specifically gifted to him at orientation in a mug that you had given him for secret Santa years ago in your hand, hum on your lips as Keegan has breakfast.

"What are we?"

"I don't know." You shrug. "Y'wanna give it a label?"

"Not really."

"There we go."

You leave after breakfast, turning down Keegan's offer to drive you back.

You're set to graduate earlier than Keegan — understandably so, and so when you're graduating again, Keegan's got flowers in his arms for you and a smile on his face as you beam at him. You don't invite the high school friend group since you've lost contact, and Keegan's all you have left from that period of life. He offers you a dinner on him, turned down when you steal the flowers and press your lips to his, pulled down by the collar as he sinks into the kiss, humming as you let go with a dramatic throw of your head, cheeky and grinning when he looks down at you.

Keegan's learned that you don't do labels out of a fear and not because you genuinely don't do labels.

Maybe you don't quite understand the point either.

You wonder what you're to do now that you're done, applying to jobs and doctorates, crashing on Keegan's couch and abandoning your apartment, moved into the original storage room that he had.

You care yet you don't.

He knows yet he doesn't.

You pay him your half of rent, and you manage to pull some strings to stay in the same university, starting at the beginning of the new year rather than the schoolyear, and when you show Keegan your offer, he's got you giggling and laughing as he pins you down on the couch.

You don't know if you crave the domesticity of your relationship or something else.

The bed in the storage room is eventually sold to some student as you start sleeping on Keegan's, his bare skin on yours more times than your heart beats in a day. Something about being vulnerable with his skin out, trusting you to never hurt or harm him in any way. You think there's something strange about making it so far with him. A piece of your past that just stuck around and never left.

Even when he graduates and you've got flowers for him, you tell him you'll just take over his lease if he decides to move out.

Instead, he lifts you into his arms, pressing his forehead to yours, asking if you really ever thought about spending the rest of your life with him.

Maybe it's just some semblance of romance to you. You don't know.

You tell him you wouldn't mind.

It's a little untraditional to do a quick courthouse wedding with a random witness pulled off the street and with rings the two of you had found at the closest thrift shop, but it's also just how it's always been.

Post-marriage ice cream. Insane move on his end, and you think it's crazy, but you think you grow used to it. You don't even ask how Keegan knew you wanted ice cream.

"You marryin' me because you wanna take care of me?"

"Always have been, honey."

Huh. Not kid anymore.

"Not kid?"

"Not with that ring on your finger."

"Maybe this was your masterplan all along."

"Maybe." He pauses to laugh. "Or maybe I just love you."

"Maybe." You pause to stare out the window. "Not changing my last name, though. What the hell is Russ?"

"The etymology has something to do with redheads or fox-likes."

"Huh." You pause to think. "That might've sold me."

"Yeah?"

"After the degree, though."

"Of course."

[sea-owl]

I personally want to see jealous Colin because I think it be funny with how dramatic the Bridgertons can be. Particularly, I want jealous Colin in this specific scene.

The scene I'm talking about is when Colin stalks follows Penelope to St Bride's church. As he's following her he notices that they are traveling in the direction towards his bachelor lodgings.

After they rolled along for a few minutes, He poked his head outside to make sure his driver had not lost sight of Penelope's carriage. There she was, right in front of him. Or at least he thought it was her. Most hired hacks looked the same, so ge was going to have to trust and hope that he was following the right one. But as he looked out, he realized they would have a much further east than he would have anticipated. In fact, they were just now passing Soho Street, which meant they were nearly to Tottenham Court Road, which meant-

Dear God, was Penelope taking the carriage to his house?

Bedford square was practically right around the corner.

A delicious thrill shot up his spine, because he couldn't imagine what she was doing in this part of town if not to see him; who else would a woman like Penelope know Bloomsbury? He couldn't imagine that her mother allowed her to associate with people actually worked for a living, and Colin's neighbors, though certainly well enough born, we're not of the aristocracy and rarely even of the gentry. And they all plodded off to work each day, doctoring and lawyering, or-

Colin frowned, Hard. They just rolled past Tottenham Court Road. What the devil was she doing this far east? He supposed her driver might not know his way around town very well and thought to take Bloomsbury Street up to Bedford Square, even though it was a bit out of the way, but-

He heard something very strange and realized it was the sound of his teeth grinding together. They just passed Bloomsbury Street and presently veering onto High Holborn.

Devil take it, they were nearly in the City? What in God's name was Penelope planning to do in the city?

First of all Colin, how would Penelope know where you lived? Is your siblings giving out your address? Because I know you didn't tell her outside of saying you were residing in Bloomsbury. Second of all that's inappropriate for her to do so good sir and you know better. Yes she's a spinsterr now, but she's still a lady and even you commented earlier how she shouldn't be leaving her house without someone with her. This man just wants the, unknown to him, love of his life by his side and does not care about the social implications. It's so funny too when he gets all pouty when he realizes that she wasn't coming to see him. Again Colin how would Penelope know your address?

And then when they're in the church and fighting for Penelope's letter.

"Colin," she whispered."Please . . . don't."

She's seen his secret writings. Why shouldn't he see her's? Did she have a lover? Was all that nonsense aboutnever having been kissed exactly that-nonsense?

Dear God was this fire burning in his belly . . . jealousy?

"Colin," she said again, choking now. She placed her hand on his, trying to prevent him from opening the envelope. Not with a strength for she could never match him on that, just with her presence.

But there was no way . . . no way could have stopped himself. He would have died before surrounding that enveloped her unopened.

Dramatic ass Bridgertons always do things the most dramatic way possible. This man was ready to fight Penelope's lover that he made up in his head. I want to see how dramatic Colin can get now that he has a face to put the lover status for Penelope. He's going to lose his mind.

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Hihi I'm new here! I really like your headcanons. Would it be alright if I could ask headcanons for the bachelors and how their romantic relationship with a farmer that already has a kid from a different relationship progress?

Like, one day a kid just randomly shows up at the farmer's doorstep with a social worker and farmer had to explain that their ex couldn't keep the child anymore, and the kid is also super anxious about moving in with them or something.

I'm really sorry- it was a scenario I've seen dabbled into once and I'm just very curious as to what others think of it too aha.

If this ask is not your cup of tea, feel free to disregard it. Have a great day op 🙏✨

Hellooooo!

Sorry for the delay, dear anon. This headcanon just turned out bigger than I planned 😅 Hope I understood your question correctly. Thank you very much for the ask, and enjoy! 🫰💕

_________________________________________

SDV bachelors x Farmer, that already has a kid from a different relationship:

Shane:

Oh, man. This is all very awkward...

Shane knew about Farmer's ex, the reason for the breakup and the fact that the child was in the care of their ex in Zuzu City.

Farmer visited their child almost every week, calling and writing letters, but Shane himself was not particularly involved, not knowing how to approach the little one.

Naturally, when the kid came to visit the farm, the chicken man would try to make the kid feel comfortable, but considering everything they'd been through, even here it was pretty awkward.

On the plus side, they was the same age as Jas, and the kids had become fast friends in a short time.

Farmer encouraged their spouse's attempts at friendship with their kid, but again, things were still pretty awkward.

When the Farmer's child arrived with a social worker some time later, Shane noticed how much the little one resembled him in his yought - confused, scared, resentful of everyone and tired of everything. Their familiar world where both parents were together was gone forever.

Later, Shane was able to explain how he'd been in a similar situation, how he'd almost lost because of the mistakes he'd made trying to cope with pain.

The kid quickly found common ground with him. Especially after they confessed that they liked chickens!

Shane doesn't claim to be a father, as the kid is pretty mature and understands on their own.

But he will treat them with the same care and responsibility as he does Jas.

They are all kinda weird family, but Shane loves them all and still can't believe how lucky he is.

Sam:

It's quite a tricky situation, but thanks to his friendliness and personality, Sam is great with kids.

When Farmer finally introduced their kid to Sam, the young guitarist immediately went into cool brother/uncle mode.

The kid was worried, but Sam began to slowly gain their trust by asking about their interest in comics or other hobbies.

It makes him happy that the kid can forget about problem and concerns at least for now, because children should be happy and play while they have their childhood.

Sam knows that Farmer broke up with their ex more or less calmly, without scandal or drama, but he knows, like Farmer, it was still hard for the kid.

He's glad that he and Farmer are trying their best to be in theirs life.

The kid's upset look and the presence of the social worker took Sam by surprise.

While the social worker was talking to Farmer, Sam offered the anxious kid something to eat. Or some space, if they still feel uncomfortable.

After learning the reason for the visit and the fact that the kid will now live on the farm, Sam gently asks his partner how he should handle this. He wants to cheer the kid up, but he also doesn't want to make them more anxious.

Fortunately, Vincent and the kid get along quickly, which pleases both Farmer and Sam. Now, though, they need to keep an eye on the kids, or they'll both get into more trouble.

Jodi and Kent also do everything they can to make Farmer's kid feel comfortable (Jodi now spoils them with tasty baked goods).

Farmer can't help but be joyful with how hard Sam tries for them and their kid and his family to keep everyone happy.

Alex:

Farmer was telling Alex about their loser ex, who had decided to trade Farmer and their child for a some stranger. What a shameless cheater...

Farmer visited their kid almost every week, but Alex was only able to go with them a few times.

At the sight of their ex, the athlete was so itching to break their nose. But he tried to keep his temper in front of the kid.

The child turns out to be a kind young one, though a bit shy and reserved. Alex thanks Yoba that they are more like the Farmer in looks and personality than the other parent.

Despite the awkward pause at first, the kid seems to like Alex. Of course, he's cool, kind, and gives them ice cream! Alex's trips with Farmer became more frequent and his friendship with Farmer's little kid grew stronger.

Some time later, when a confused Alex let the stranger into the house, he was shocked to find Farmer's kid standing behind him. They looked... so sad.

The social worker announced that the ex had decided to relinquish parental rights and the child had been brought here.

The poor kid was quieter than a mouse, but Alex was as friendly as possible and tried to cheer him up.

In the back of his mind, though, he felt a wild rage, because he could hear that the reason the ex had refused to give up their own child was because their new partner didn't want to babysit them.

Alex knows more than anyone what it's like when one parent is such a dirtbag. But right now he doesn't care about losers, he's got Farmer and their kid.

Getting the kid used to the new environment was very difficult, but Alex helped them get to know the local children.

Evelyn accepted the kid as her own great-grandchild, remembering to feed them delicious baked goods. George was a bit stingy with his emotions, but he also accepted them as his own.

Alex will not leave them in trouble and will help them to cope with all the difficulties. Now the Farmer and their child are his family.

Sebastian:

Sebastian feels awkward and doesn't know what to do. Help.

He and the Farmer's child were so similar in personality when they met - silent, shy and withdrawn.

Sebastian realises that Farmer's child is having a hard time with the fact that their parents are divorced. But emo doesn't know how to start a conversation.

So when Farmer left Sebby and their kid alone for half an hour, there was an awkward silence for the first 5 minutes.

The kid was already getting bored. Sebastian decided to give it a try after all.

"Do you like frogs?" Judging by the spark in the kid's eyes, they had already found at least one topic of interest to both of them.

Farmer smiles when they returned to see the two of them chatting about different amphibians.

A few such encounters and Sebastian had become a cool uncle to them.

Sebastian was hurt to hear that Farmer's ex had given up their parental rights, when Farmer's kid had already visited them, with a social worker.

He will leave the kid alone, as they definitely need some time alone and to collect their thoughts.

Yet, Sebby and the Farmer are always there to cheer up the kid.

On a rainy day, he will show the baby the best place to find frogs.

Sebastian is good at supporting both his partner and their baby.

It can be awkward at times, but Sebby loves them all, so it will be okay.

Harvey:

Given Harvey's profession, he's pretty adept at finding common ground with anxious children.

So when Farmer first introduced Harvey to their child from their first marriage, the local Pelican Town doctor already knew how to behave.

He's glad that despite the divorce, Farmer is trying their best to support their kid, as stress can take a big toll on not only their mental health, but their physical health as well.

Even more so, it's not the child's fault that fate has worked out this way and their parents live in completely different places.

Of course, Harvey is not as "cool" as other bachelors, but he manages to interest the child in his model aeroplanes.

Maybe if they like to read, the doctor will give them something interesting to read (something that isn't a medical encyclopedia).

Harvey almost cried when the kid called him uncle and cool adult.

And all was going smoothly until a social worker knocked on the door of the farmhouse.

After explaining that the other parent, Farmer's ex, could no longer financially support the child, they placed the child in their care.

Harvey is worried about them, because all the fear of moving, new surroundings, and separated parents can have a very negative effect on poor kid.

Harvey will try to be there to help them and Farmer.

Maybe insist on therapy for the kid. Still, it could use some professional help.

Fortunately, Harvey knows what to do and he won't let anyone or anything upset Farmer and their kid. Doctor's words!

Elliott:

Elliott still can't believe that Farmer's ex turned out to be such a coward and unworthy person! Cheating on Farmer. when they already had a child together!

Of course, now Farmer is with him, and yes, it's not worth spending all the nerves on the past, but it's just that the writer is outraged to the core.

Also outraged that the ex just abandoned their child like that, saying they "don't have time for them now." Unbelievable!

Poor child... As much as the Farmers tried to comfort their own kud, all of these events took a heavy toll on them. And Elliott decided it was his duty to help the kid and Farmer, the love of his life.

His first attempts, though, end awkwardly, as Elliott doesn't know where to start. And should he start so immediately? Maybe they need some alone time on the contrary?

He decided to pick up a couple of books to help (mostly children's books, and a couple of books about how to communicate with children/teens).

The writer was lucky that the kid loves books!

There was even a moment when the kid felt comfortable around Elliott and asked them to help make their own little book. Elliott is more than happy to help them.

He also won't forget to praise the Farmer, because it was through their efforts and love that their child didn't fall victim to the neglect of the other parent. It's a shame that, coincidentally, the kid didn't arrive sooner.

Elliott will have a bit of a hard time, but he will do a great job in the role of carer for the Farmer and their kid, accepting them as his own child.

[ghouldtime]

*slides into the DMS*

S O. What does social anxiety for König look like through your fantastic characterization then? 👀

(Love your Alone operator series btw. Got me on the edge of my seat with each chapter!!)

(Thank you!! 💚💚💚 I'm so glad you're enjoying :D you all have been so so sweet with it and Im over the MOON so many people have liked it)

To answer this question I'm going to have to be a biiig yapper and explain why I think of him the way I do

Going to say this to start, but I'm going with the true fact that König is indeed diagnosed with social anxiety - anything else I'm saying is based off of my personal interpretation of how he acts in game as a disclaimer

I'm also going to state that personally, the König I write is in his lower to mid 40's. Sorry not sorry, I don't see him as a young dude. Especially not when it's pretty much agreed upon that he's a colonel. So he's had a SIGNIFICANT amount of life experience, and a significant amount of time to work on himself and have introspection.

To me, it makes the most sense that he was diagnosed with social anxiety earlier on in his childhood since it was significantly more obvious when he was younger. Something that severe wasn't unnoticed by those around him because some of them did care about him. It's also stated he's suffered from severe social anxiety throughout his life so that's how I took it.

I personally go with he grew up in a more rural town in his homeland of Austria, which meant there weren't exactly others around during the first few years. "Go play with the neighbors kids" didn't really work when there weren't neighbors around. It was mainly him and his parents and an occasional relative over.

What could be brushed off as initial shyness clearly couldn't be anymore when he finally was enrolled in school.

Even on the first day when it's "introduce yourself to everyone", he fucked that up so monumentally it'll be engraved forever in his hall of shameful memories that he thinks about late at night. School was an utter nightmare, quite frankly, from moment one. The whole situation was too much, too stressful, and too different from the life he had at home. He flat out refused to get up and present in front of the class and wouldn't talk in group projects just for the fear of embarrassing himself. At that time, he was hitting all the indicators for social anxiety like they're the targets he shoots at today.

He missed out on a lot of interaction with other kids initially because of how awkward he was - and having any form of anxiety never helps in social situations. Talking to others wasn't something that came naturally and his own panic amplified it tenfold. Most times, he'd either pretend he didn't hear them, avoid them, or stray as far to the edge of the group as possible to avoid it. Unfortunately this made him an easy target because kids are RUTHLESS and turned him into even more outcast as well which only worsened it.

School always sucked for him due to that, despite the fact that he was a smart kid. No amount of smarts could save you from social persecution when you had nearly no social skills to boot. [ side note but I'm dying on the hill that he's incredibly intelligent and has a bachelors degree (at the very least)].

His parents kept him in therapy to help him manage because without it, he'd be back at square one refusing to go to school and faking a cold just to get out of it. And of course, therapy is a very important tool when it comes to healing, coping, and managing severe mental disorders. The whole reason why he doesn't show such bad anxiety anymore is because he kept the skills he learned and applies them so much that it becomes his second nature.

He's had at least 35 years of this, he's good enough to mask and to keep up his facade.

Another part of why he doesn't show it nearly as much is because he joined the military and was thrown through the wringer with it. Being bullied for so long was a major motivator for joining in the first place, as he needed something to get away from the peers who tormented him so and he needed a new life where he wasn't known as target #1. But he ALSO wanted to gain actual confidence and more certainty in himself.

Joining the military really means you're not left with such things as many choices when it comes to anxiety in social situations. You're forced into quarters with others, have to work side-by-side, do nearly everything together, so on and so forth. He knew that going in but at that point for him it was like extreme exposure therapy, the last step he needed to really put everything he learned in therapy to work.

That doesn't mean he didn't suffer or loved it. No, it was terrible, intense, and nerve-wracking. But he wouldn't have done it otherwise if he didn't want that. Being in the military didn't give him the leeway to avoid what made him anxious, it taught him to face it head on and fight.

Now that he's up there in age and has considerable more experience (and leeway with having a higher rank), the ways he expresses it [look at me finally answering the question] are more subtle.

On the field, you're likely not going to notice it. Because that's him turning the little auto pilot switch in his mind to on when he has a job. The job is his focus and everything has been so engrained in his mind that it's muscle memory. He's, quite frankly, focused on not dying and getting any job done over himself. The joking you often hear him do and taunting alike is part of how he's expressing the confidence he feels when he's in his element, when he KNOWS what he is doing.

If you look closely or approach him off the field, however, it's another story. He usually tenses or straightens himself out when people approach and will hold that until they leave (unless they're someone who he truly knows). Many assume that's a taught habit of the military, but that's only half-true. He did that before then.

Unlike when he's working, he doesn't have a guide or things he knows he has to do in a specific order to best ensure survival - no matter how much talking to other people feels like the heat of the battle, you can't (legally) solve it with a gun or throw a frag and book it out of there. There's no true guide to social interactions and that stresses him out. There's no manual, no field guide, no ten step card on how to successfully navigate them.

He knows things that are normal to say, he knows sometimes what he should say - it's just a matter of finding the phrasing and how to say them. Yet it seems like whenever someone doesn't follow his pre-programmed line of thought when it comes to their talking, his mind can shut down and go blank as he stares, trying to figure out where to go or what to say (spoiler: it usually doesn't end well).

He's usually awkward to talk to because he's running over everything in his head as he tries to think of what best to say to avoid further interactions or ones that could be more targeting to him. And, as mentioned, he lacks the average set of social skills that plenty learn in childhood because he didn't have that proper socialization. He's also still not the best at talking itself and can be blunt and to-the-point, which also doesn't usually go down well.

Not to mention, he's bad at small talk and has a terrible, sarcastic sense of humor that many can't read and it quickly turns things uncomfortable very fast because everyone takes him seriously. It never helps he usually doesn't explain himself all too well, usually leaving it as is as he secretly wishes he didn't talk at all when mortification sets in. Hurrying away with an excuse of some paperwork or something else to busy himself is his go-to after those.

When possible, he'll avoid small-talk and greatly prefers gestures instead. Someone who can appreciate his greater need for silence and a lack of talking is someone who he will greatly appreciate in turn. He's a firm believer that not all silences are uncomfortable and sometimes, it IS best not to say anything at all.

Due to his childhood too, he's not really fond of being around many people and will do his best to avoid it. Unless he has to grin and bare it, he won't. He finds his mind calmest when he can just be himself without having to worry about saying the right things to appease others or to be friendly. That way he can focus on what he wants, think how he wants, and feels how he wants without second guessing himself or having to worry about existing.

He's going to avoid most public settings when possible. Though he can now suitably manage his anxiety, they're something he passes up on. Grocery store trips are something he does maybe once a week or two, if that - stock piling so he has to go to the store less is his usual strategy. Anything he can do himself, he WILL do himself, if he doesn't have a trusted person who can do it better or can help.

Notably, he also doesn't have many friends. He's like talking to a brick wall and unless you're considerably persistent and understanding of his need for space, you won't get far. A lot of people don't have the time nor patience for it, but if you do get close to him, he does come out of his shell. He appreciates anyone who cares enough to actually get close to him and get to know him despite how awkward he can be, and will be loyal to the end because of that.

Another side effect is that he doesn't sleep well. Between the massive amounts of trauma from his job and the trauma from his childhood, he doesn't sleep well as is. But the social anxiety aspect comes into play because many nights, his mind is rerunning all the interactions he's had as he chronically overthinks them. He always wonders what he could've done, how he could've improved, and what they're thinking of him (even if they're someone he may never run into again). Its very hard for him to shut his mind off and doing such usually requires him drowning everything else and making himself not think about that, or anything, any more.

[Another side note: He's an avid reader. Reading gives him new things to think about and can help put him to sleep, especially before bed. It's a good way for him to stop thinking about whatever was nagging him and shifts his mind into thinking about other things he enjoys instead)

Basically, IN SHORT this isn't my full in-depth detailed characterization of exactly who I think he is - the reason he's not presenting it as an anxious ball of pure energy who is so uwu shy and soft is because he is incredibly well-managed with his severe social anxiety at his age and that's uh, just not him. Social anxiety doesn't mean he's a blubbering mess or will cry at the slightest inconvenience and reducing him to that or treating anyone with social anxiety like they're a child because of it does not help at alllll.

He's had extensive therapy for this, he's got his methods, he can mask very well. He's a WHOLE GROWN MAN who is responsible for not only his actions but how he manages his emotions and he knows it. But if you know him and know what to look for, you'll be able to pick it up.

(Also the sheer amount of scenarios I've seen where people think he just would... cry if you took his mask off??? Him???? HIM???? König, "I can make you talk, where are they?" the skilled PMC operator? That one? That guy? Yeah no, anyone dumb enough to do that better have signed their will prior or hopefully has an intensive love for scrubbing all the floors with a single old toothbrush. He won't tolerate people harassing or hustling him or pressing on his nerves. Sure, it reminds him of his childhood bullies, but quite frankly that behavior as grown adults trying that is RIDICULOUS, it pisses him off and immediately lowers his opinion on them.)

To whoever made it this far, I hope this made sense, I took melatonin before I got the ask so I'm in another realm right now LMAO. König is one of my favorites and was the first character I realllly really loved and I just hate seeing him done so dirty. Especially as someone with severe social anxiety myself, it irritates me when it's portrayed just so... wrong and quite frankly, in a lazy, offensive manner lacking any nuance especially in relation to the character who has it. Like just making him stutter and cry isn't all social anxiety is and there's SO much depth and things to work with despite the... actual substance as far as his bio goes

[the-fandom-is-now-my-life]

melusines say the darndest things

Even after successfully hiding your relationship to the eyes of Fontaine's people sometimes children melusines can have loose lips and accidentally say a bit too much and cause misunderstandings

Wc: 1.2k

Cw: reader gets called mom by Ngen but treated as GN/ they/them, melusine causes a pretty big misunderstanding, ideas of having children (unspecified if pregnancy or adoption)

“Good morning, mister barista” a small Melusine calls from behind the cupboard, the little green girl tiptoes so her eyes could be seen.

“Morning Ngen, chocolate milk?” The kind man asks as he does everyday, and already knowing the answer he starts heating the milk.

“ Yep, thanks” she hops towards a table and keeps seated while kicking her feet waiting for her milk.

Soon after Arouet came with a tall glass with a little bit of foam on top and grated chocolate over “Here is your milk, do you want something to eat?”

“No, thank you” she smiles at him, making him beam, “but can I ask something?” She asks softly.

“Of course, what is it?”

“What is a mom and a dad? When I go play on the playground ladies always ask where are my mom and dad” she pouts

At the question his blood runs cold “ uhm, a mom is someone who takes care of you and comforts you when you feel scared and a dad is someone you know can protect you from anything and spoils you rotten?” The forty year old man never thought much about that but attempts to summarize it with his own experiences.

“ Oh! Then I do have a mom and a dad!” Her small eyes shine

“ Really? Good for you”

“ Yep! That makes Dr. YN my mom and Monsieur Neuvillette my dad! So that is why they sleep in the same bed then!” She clasps her fin like hands together as if she just figured out the answer to a riddle.

The base chatter that always swarmed the cafe and gave it its characteristic liveliness fell silent, the different tables all were interested in what the Melusine said.

The journalists found a fresh scoop that could be exploited for months on end, amdeven if the noblewomen would spread the information around their circles faster than they can finish editing the news, such a shame the great judge isn't a bachelor any longer but that does allow them and their husbands to try and social climb by associating with his spouse.

On the other hand the salarymen working for the palais mermonia were neither happy nor sad, simply concerned. If their boss had a fight with his lover or decided to take half a day on valentine's day or his anniversary would they have to shoulder the extra work?

“ Oh~ how cute” a pitchy and sickly sweet voice starts speaking at her, a woman with black hair and wearing a noble dress takes a seat next to Ngen “tell me more, shop owner get me a platter of macarons for the sweet girl!”

“ And a portion of madeleines!” The reporter sits on the other chair, leaving him facing the noblewoman with the Melusine on the middle

“I'm not sure… Dr. YN, I mean mom always says too many sweets are bad for you”

“ Don't worry! It's just some cookies for breakfast, I'm sure they wouldn't mind if you don't eat dessert at night”

“ Exactly as the woman says, moderation is key”

As the plate with macarons gets settled on the table first the lady pushes it towards the melusine accompanied by her questions “So, tell me what do your mom and dad do? Do they frequent a certain restaurant? Or do they read certains books?-" Before any of the cookies were grabbed the journalists pushes the macarons away with the madeline plate, the colorful sugary dots moving to one of the edges because of the force.

“ At least ask something interesting, when did they get married? How long ago was that?”

“ What is up with those useless questions? How are you even using that information?” The manicured fingers tap methodically against against the glass tables, the noblewomen who were still on the other table started muttering about the scenario

“And for what use would knowing what books they read? Readers of the gossip column need to be started with the base of the gossip, like when and how it started“

Before they can keep bickering Ngen bit on a madeleine before taking another bite of the macaron as she spoke “ I know dad really likes soup at the hotel Debord so that is why mom rented the whole place for a night for next week” the journalist mentally notes the date for later use

“ A special secret dinner? So romantic”

“ Yep, mom said they wanted a private moment when they told dad…” she keeps speaking when suddenly she seems to notice something

“ Told what??”

“ Oh, does that make me a big sister then?”

“Is that another baby set?” Neuville looks at your reflection from the bathroom's mirror, your hands holding a yellow dress with daffodil embroidery and white knit socks

“ It's from Mrs Jonquille” you rub the cotton skirt between your fingers “ it seems to be good quality too”

Neuvillette walks towards you and grabs the socks, inspecting it awestruck. They could barely cover the tips of his fingers, causing you to laugh “ Are human newborns so… tiny?”

When suddenly a howl breaks the silence startling you both and leaving the set on the nightstand

“ I'm sorry, daisy!” Ngen apologizes to the puppy barking at her under her bed

You quickly tell her “Ngen, I told you to be more careful where you walk, daisy is still very little” a soft thumping against the tiles approaches the shared bedroom and a sad melusine hugs your leg

“ I don't want daisy to be mad at me” she whines into your pajamas

“Don't worry, I'm sure she will forgive you” you pat her head softly, messing the green and blue hair “she is just scared because you hurt her, but she truly likes you”

“ because I'm her big sister?”

As she asks that Neuvillette’s eyes dart towards yours, confusion meeting with confusion. The only idea that Neuvillette could conceive of the sudden titles being thrown around was Ngen being jealous of the attention towards the new puppy. Even then he recognizes to himself that he doesn't mind the familiarity and might even enjoy the cozy feeling in his chest.

Holding her in his arms a placid smile on his lips “Yes, Ngen, Daisy loves her big sister” Without her noticing the dog now peeks her head inside the room after hearing her name the puppy sits down at your feet and you hold her to Ngen’s face

“See? She was just scared. Now get ready for bed, it's past your bedtime”

“ Okay~” she quickly jumps out of Neuvillette's arms and the puppy follows after her, her tail playfully waging

A few seconds of silence settle in the room and you walk to the bathroom to brush your teeth

“Why did she suddenly start with the mom and dad thing?”

Neuvillette starts tying his hair back in a braid, his two blue streaks outside of it “ I'm unaware, she still referred to me as ‘monsieur Neuvillette’ when she accompanied me to the Palais mermonia” he sits down on his side of the bed, the white sheets matching his pajamas made of white silk and blue details “I hope it didn't bother you. If it did I apologize, I will talk with her about it tomorrow”

“ I didn't mind, actually. I think kinda sweet, like if she was our daughter”

As he pulls back the blankets he finds the baby dress on your nightstand and stretches over to grab it, the yellow cotton intricately embroidered with a darker stringing the form of daffodils, it was a very delicate work, noticeably even just by touch “it would be a waste for this to go unworn” he mumbles softly

“ It would, wouldn't it” you smile at him from the on suite bathroom

[hyperlexichypatia]

One time I asked my mom (in her 70s) whether she, personally, knew any people in so-called "traditional marriages." I defined a "traditional marriage" as follows:

A man and a woman, married to each other

They are both each other's first and only spouse, neither has been married before

Neither of them has any children with any other partner

Any children they have were born after the couple was married.

After thinking about it, my mom was able to come up with a few examples of such couples. But only a few. And she had to think about it.

Yet we still live in a society where this type of family is considered "the norm" and the much more common types (blended families, single parents, divorced people) are considered "exceptions."

And this is not the only thing like this! There are many experiences/lifestyles/family types that are treated as The Default or The Norm that, in fact, may not apply to a majority at all!

Even in discussions like "We should remember that not everyone has [normative experience]," it's still framed as though the normative experience is, of course, still the statistical norm. It might not be at all! Or maybe it is the statistical norm worldwide, or nationwide, but not in your particular community, or your social circle.

Sometimes it's necessary to look at global or national statistics to correct your bias of extrapolating from your social circle. Social bubbles are a real problem. But. But. Other times. It's useful to just look at your social circle and ask yourself "Do these population-wide statistics really apply here? Should I be looking at them to determine what's 'normal' instead of just looking around me?"

So here are some things that are culturally assumed in the U.S. to be "the norm", that you might want to ask yourself: How many people do I know personally that this is actually true of? (Other countries have their own maybe-not-that-normal norms that I'm not as familiar with, but feel free to weigh in on).

How many people do you know personally who:

Have a "traditional marriage" as described above?

Have a work schedule of Monday through Friday, ending at 5:00 p.m.? i.e. for whom Saturdays, Sundays, and evenings after 5:00 are "not at work" time?

Attended residential college from ages 18 to 22, and graduated with a bachelor's degree by age 23?

Had most or all of their college tuition and living expenses paid for by their parents?

Have, as an adult, the same surname as both of their parents, who were and still are, married to each other? Which was their father's surname which their mother took at marriage? i.e. whose parents could accurately be referred to as "Mr. and Mrs. [that persons' same surname]"?

Don't take any regular daily medicine?

Depending on your social circle, you might know very few people in these categories! But you probably still hear people say unquestioned, taken-for-granted things like "We should have the meeting at 6:00, so people can come after work," or "Of course parents of college students should have a say, since they're paying for it."

In many demographics, these things aren't just "not always true"; they're hardly if ever true. I wrote here about the false assumption that college students are uniformly single, childless young adults. Are you scheduling your events on the assumption that evenings and weekends are free time? For that matter, how many child care providers serve families during the hours that most parents actually work? Are we ready to admit that these things aren't the norm yet?

[gabessquishytum]

Hullo! I just saw a video today from Dancing with the Stars about mango or two men dancing the tango and immediately thought Yesss Dreamling! I was rambling about it with friends and thought of sharing some ideas here too. @yamru who's from Argentina, also let me know that tango was originally danced by male partners!

This clip particularly reminded me of two alphas from extremely wealthy but rival families, who think they can't be together because societal norms say they have to be with an omega to continue the family line. In fact, initially they hate each other! But after a lot of meet ugly moments, angst, UST, these two fall head over heels in love with each other. Now this dance happens at a party where they are still in their enemies phase, but insanely attracted to each other, and they are developing feelings as they dance. After the party they cannot stop thinking about each other and how it will feel to be together. They torture themselves about the logistics of it and concerns of how to continue the family line. But eventually when they get together, all rules fly out the window. They also realize that being together is more than just resolving physical tension. Their culture requires them to be macho alphas but what they both truly crave is just being pampered by each other. But because they are idiot alphas, they don't tell each other how they really feel. When one of them, maybe Dream, is forced to marry an omega suitor, say Alex or Calliope, Hob comes to the wedding at the right time to profess his love and that he doesn't care about these social norms. And Dream, who was waiting to hear these lines, flies to Hob's arms! The family and guests are scandalized but Dream and Hob don't mind what others might say anymore. I'm not sure how to resolve the baby business. Maybe lucienne is a doctor who tells them about scientific advancements about how alphas can carry a child. Or use a surrogate. Anyway everyone kinda resigns to the fact Hob and Dream are a couple now. They are both still every bit ruthless alphas but also indulgent softies for each other. When they finally get married, of course they dance the tango again at their wedding!

MANGO. MAN TANGO. I love it.

I really lean towards the idea of Dream and Hob being business rivals - maybe not rivals, necessarily, but they're both big-shot CEOS. Dream has that inherited wealth and Hob is more of a self-made man. They know each other from conferences, galas, and society in general. Both are considered VERY eligible alpha bachelors. And they're kind of frenemies. Who obviously want to fuck.

Hob is always teasing Dream by flirting with him, and it annoys Dream because it really turns him on. So at this party he tries to teach Hob a lesson by being receptive to his flirting, and dancing with him. Turns out, Hob wasn't teasing though - he's totally sincere in his advances and spends much of the dance whispering filthy things in Dream’s ear, until Dream drags him out to a secluded spot and shuts him up. With many, many kisses.

They spend the night together and it's like paradise, but of course it can't last...... Dream swears Hob to secrecy, Hob is kindof offended that Dream would be so ashamed of him. But he also understands. He's an alpha with his own reputation to uphold, too.

(If Dream’s intended omega bride is Calliope, she knows exactly what's going on and spends the entire betrothal trying to subtly encourage Dream to follow his heart. Dream is too stubborn to listen.)

Hob is fortunately brave enough to make a stand and declare his love for Dream. He doesn't want to live without the man he loves, and doesn't see why it matters that they both have knots! Hob wants to build a life with Dream and do cute domestic things like baking and flower arranging, and he also wants to fuck Dream face down on the living room carpet. He wants to merge their companies and be ruthless in board meetings together. Isn't that what life's all about?

Even if they can't legally marry, Dream decides that he'll put a ring on Hob’s finger anyway. He's not letting him go. So, Calliope happily marries someone else, perhaps one of Dream’s siblings. After a few years she offers to be a surrogate for her favourite pair of alphas. And a few years after that, laws are changed and Hob and Dream finally tie the knot (hahaha).

They are very very good tangueros, and have learned to seamlessly swap the lead/follower roles... although other dancers have to beware. There's no telling whether they might actually start fucking on the dancefloor...

[pleaseeeimjustagirl]

You Need A Resting Season

What is a resting season?

As women, we pour so much into others (family, friends, siblings, pets) forgetting about ourselves. We work ourselves into overdrive feeling empty like life is passing us by and we don't know who we are or what we want. And if you feel this way you need a resting season, a resting season is like going into hibernation pulling away from the world and all of the unnecessary stress that we put on ourselves. While in your resting season, you are going to be quitting a lot of the things you used to do. A lot of high-stress activities that aren’t a priority such as school and work. This is the time for you to rest and pour into yourself. Work on the issues you have with yourself maybe you lack self-love, self-esteem, self-worth, or confidence maybe you want to lose weight and better your skin. It is time for you to invest in yourself and fix the things you can change and not worry about the things you can’t change. For every woman a resting season is different so it is important to know your priorities, the improvements you want to make, and what your resting season is for.

Signs you may need a resting season 

♡ You are burned out. Even though are getting a full night of sleep you have this never-ending feeling of being tired of life, your daily cycle, your environment, and so on.

♡ Life isn’t fun anymore. You feel like you are in a never-ending cycle going from school/work to home. You could be giving too much of yourself to others, leaving no room for enjoyment, hobbies, and self-care.

♡ You're always worried. You may be feeling overwhelmed by all the tasks and obligations you have in life. You constantly have too many thoughts circling in your head never giving you the time to think.

♡ You don’t know what path you're going down. Maybe the dream career you thought wanted you do not want anymore, you have switched your major a bunch of times and still don't feel connected to it. 

♡ Social media Is taking over your life. You spend hours on end on social media watching and reading toxic content and you need to step away and reconnect with yourself and the real world.

♡ You want to level up. You lack self-love and confidence you don’t like the person you see in the mirror anymore. She is tired, overworked, unhealthy, and doesn’t take time for herself.

These are just a few but there can be so many more reasons why you need a resting season. 

I am currently in my resting season 

Some of the reasons above resonated with me a lot I woke up one day and realized I was burned out I was stressing myself out with so many requirements to be perfect, rich, and live a certain lifestyle by a certain age. I switched my major in college a bunch of times I plan on graduating in 2025 with a bachelor in science of psychology but after I'm going to accelerated nursing school. I felt like a failure for a little while thinking I wasted 4+ years of my life chasing a degree that I don't even want now. I didn't like what I saw in the mirror and I had a lot of negative self-talk. But then it clicked to me I needed to check out from life for a little while and focus on myself and work on me. I wrote out my goals, what I needed to fix about myself, and the women I wanted to be coming out of this resting season. And I started that day working on myself  I have changed a lot. I'm still in my resting season working on myself, investing in myself daily to become that woman of my dreams this is why I made this blog<3. 

You can work on yourself without being in a resting season but I recommend resting seasons because they are better for focusing with no distractions other than things you must. If you feel a connection to this post maybe it is time for you to get into your resting season 

I'm open to any comments or private messages if you can relate and please let me know any further topics you want me to cover

[deepcreekvulture]

Spencer Reid's College Timeline

So, I was chilling at my local Library and decided to use my very extensive free time to write out Spencer Reid’s College timeline (or at least how it makes the most sense to me).

There’s probably going to be a lot of inconsistencies and possible contradictions in this, but please give me a little grace. I don’t go to college, and I'm just silly. 

I did try to be as accurate as I could, but there’s only so much I can do with my little brain and 10 mgs of Adderall. 

I also tried to be as realistic as I could, especially with considering how Diana’s condition would affect his education. But, again, it's not going to be perfect. Feel free to share your thoughts.

What we know:

-Spencer Reid graduated from a Las Vegas public high school at the age of 12 (01.18 “Somebody’s Watching”)

-He went to Caltech. I personally like to think that he also went to MIT (Breen Frazier has admitted that Spencer saying he want to MIT in 07.04 “Painless” was a continuity error, but I think it is possible that he went to both, just not at the same time.)

-He has 3 PhDs in Mathematics, Chemistry, and Engineering (04.08 “Masterpiece”)

-He had 3 Bachelors degrees in Psychology, Sociology, and Philosophy  (04.08 “Masterpiece”)

-Joined the BAU around July of 2004 at the age of 22 (05.16 “Mosley Lane”)

Spencer is talking to Sarah Hillridge and mentions that he’s been with the BAU for “5 years, 7 months, and 19 days...” doing the math puts it around July of 2004.

-Spencer was born in October of 1981

There is some confusion about whether his birthday is October 12th or October 28th. I believe that his birthday is October 28th 1981, Emily Prentiss’s birthday is October 12th 1970 (04.14 “Cold Comfort” & her headstone)- and it is very unlikely that the two of them would share a birthday and it not be mentioned. (It also gives some more insight to why Spencer loves Halloween so much- it’s right after his birthday!)

So, assuming he started kindergarten at 5 years old, Spencer was in grade school from around 1986-1994. It is likely that he could have finished grade school faster, but a lot of the time public school systems want to keep students from jumping too many grades in order to not stunt their social development. 

I am taking the liberty of assuming that Spencer received all 3 PhDs before joining the FBI- so from age 12-22 (Over 30 years of schooling for three PhDs in the span of around 10 years, wowza).

Someone as smart as Spencer would’ve definitely gotten a 36 on the ACTs, so prestigious universities would be banging down his door to get their hands on his geniusness. BUT, Spencer loves his mom, and he wouldn’t want to stray too far from her. He also says he was drawn to Caltech because of certain professors in an article written about him.

We know that Spencer went to Caltech and would bike to classes and such. He was most likely able to stay at the dorms for free and given financial support from his scholarships. It is unclear how Spencer could’ve balanced having his mom in Nevada while he was in California, but there are buses and public transit to and from Las Vegas to Pasadena (ranging from 4-7 hours for a one way ride, so 8-14 hours round trip). William Reid, despite leaving Spencer and Diana, most likely maintained providing money to them due to paternal obligation and guilt.

There are, of course, ways for Spencer to care for his mom even all the way in Pasadena: Neighbors could’ve checked on Diana regularly/daily, Spencer could’ve called daily to remind her to take her medicine, etc.

To make Spencer going to both Caltech and MIT make sense, I figure Spencer would get his PhDs in Mathematics and Chemistry from Caltech then after Diana is institutionalized Spencer enrolls in MIT for engineering. 

The University term dates are loosely based on the academic calendar they provide on their websites.

(Rough) Caltech term dates:

Spring term: April to June

Summer term: June to August

Fall term: September to December

Winter term: January to March

(Rough) MIT term dates:

Spring term: February to May

Summer term:June to August

Fall term: September to December

I know that in the U.S. you don’t have to have a Masters degree to get into the PhD program, but Spencer likes to learn and I figured he might want to get the most out of his time in college- or it might be a little contingency from the University so he’s still pacing himself and they can still see his growth and all that good stuff.

NOW ONTO THE TIMELINE.

At Caltech, Spencer would most likely have more freedom to complete his schooling faster and they would’ve worked with him to create a good plan for him to complete things at his own pace while also following whatever school protocols they have. 

Spencer stays in Pasadena from the Fall term (Begins around mid September), through the winter term, and until the end of the Spring term (Ends around end of June), he goes home to Las Vegas during the summer term and winter/spring breaks.

Beginning of Fall 1994- Starts college @ Caltech studying Mathematics– Age: 12 turning 13

End of Spring 1995- Finishes his Bachelors in Mathematics– Age: 13

Summer 1995- Home

Beginning of Fall 1995- Starts Masters in Mathematics– Age: 13 turning 14

End of Spring 1996- Finishes Masters in Mathematics– Age: 14

Summer 1996- Home

Beginning of Fall 1996- Starts PhD in Mathematics & starts Bachelors in Chemistry– Age:14 turning 15

End of Spring 1997- Finishes Bachelors in Chemistry– Age: 15

Summer 1997- Home

Beginning of Fall 1997- Starts Masters in Chemistry– Age: 15 turning 16

End of Spring 1998- Finishes PhD in Mathematics & finishes Masters in Chemistry– Age: 16

Summer 1998- Home, Diana suffers a bout of bad psychosis and Spencer cannot return full time at Caltech during the Fall term. Due to his mother’s condition, Spencer contacts the school board and they work out a plan where Spencer can work on his Chemistry PhD in Las Vegas with the use of public Library computers and occasional trips to the campus for exams if possible. 

Beginning of Fall 1998- Works on his PhD in Chemistry, living in Las Vegas– Age: 16 turning 17

Spring 1999- Works on his PhD in Chemistry, living in Las Vegas– Age: 17

End of Summer 1999- Finishes PhD in Chemistry, living in Las Vegas– Age: 17

Spencer starts making arrangements to move Diana into a facility when he turns 18. He also applies to MIT to start their engineering program, manages to work out a plan to enroll in their Fall term but only move to a dorm at MIT after he gets his mom institutionalized (around October/November 1999)

Beginning of Fall 1999- Enrolls in MIT’s fall term on scholarship, starts Bachelors in Engineering– Age: 18

End of Spring 2000- Finishes Bachelors in Engineering– Age: 18

Beginning of Summer 2000- Starts Masters in Engineering– Age: 18

End of Fall 2000- Finishes Masters in Engineering– Age: 18 turning 19

Beginning of Spring 2001- Starts PhD in Engineering– Age: 19

Summer 2001- Works on PhD in Engineering– Age: 19

Fall 2001- Works on PhD in Engineering– Age: 19 turning 20

Feeling immense guilt for having his mother institutionalized, Spencer splits his attention between his Engineering studies and studying Schizophrenia independently. At the end of the Fall term at MIT, Spencer starts corresponding with a professor at Harvard University and is invited to help with a study on understanding Schizophrenia and the effects of different medications. He takes off both the Spring and Summer terms of 2002 in order to do said study.

Beginning of Spring 2002- Independent study– Age: 20

End of Summer 2002- Independent study– Age: 20

Beginning of Fall 2002- Resumes working on PhD in Engineering– Age: 20 turning 21

End of Spring 2003- Finishes PhD in Engineering– Age: 21

Beginning of Fall 2003- Starts Bachelors in Psychology at MIT– Age: 21 turning 22

Spencer goes to a seminar hosted by the BAU (Most likely with Gideon and Hotch), he’s very engaged and vocal during the seminar and catches Gideon’s attention.

Spring 2004- Spencer starts at the FBI academy– Age: 22

FBI academy is 4 months.

Summer 2004- Spencer joins the BAU after graduating from the academy– Age: 22

After joining the BAU, Spencer transfers his credit hours from MIT to a University in Washington D.C. to continue going to school part time.

End of Fall 2004- Finishes Bachelors in Psychology– Age: 22 turning 23

Most of Spencer’s attention is on his work in the BAU, so he slows way down on getting his degrees, and gets a degree in sociology both because it interests him and also because it’ll help with work.

Beginning of Spring 2005- Starts Bachelors in Sociology– Age: 23

End of Fall 2005- Finishes Bachelors in Sociology– Age: 23 turning 24

Beginning of Spring 2008- Starts Bachelors in Philosophy– Age: 26

End of Fall 2008- FInishes Bachelors in Philosophy– Age: 26 turning 27

Again: Breen Frazier has said that the line in 07.04 “Painless” about Spencer going to MIT was an error. I actually think it might be another way to show Spencer’s guilt over putting his mom in the psychiatric hospital- being so close without visiting might’ve made him feel even worse so he wanted to run away to a school across the country. 

Also I feel like Spencer having all these degrees shows that he didn’t really know what he was supposed to do with his intellect so he was just doing whatever interested him at the time until he met Gideon.

We are shown two articles (that I can remember) about Spencer college time frame:

There's one from 1997/1998, we are shown an article written about Spencer getting a Bachelor's degree, this would make him ~16. I’m not sure if it lists that it’s his first Bachelor’s degree- but I’m going to say that it’s just about the one he got for Chemistry which was his second Bachelors based on my timeline.

I don’t think it makes sense for Spencer to have done ~3/4 years of college before getting his first bachelors and then the other 6 or so years cramming the rest of his schooling? Eh, I don’t like it.

And there’s one in 04.08 “Memoriam” we are shown an article about Spencer receiving his first PhD at the age of 17. In my timeline he finishes his first PhD at the age of 16- which isn’t too far off so I’m choosing to believe that it’s a typo in the article (I know it’s kinda cheating but whatever).  

I had his PhD programs take around 2 years to complete because research and dissertations take time, no matter how speedy Spencer is.

If Spencer wanted to make any extra cash on the side, he could help with tutoring, work at the campus library, help coach any collegiate sports teams at the college, etc.

A lot of the things I added in this are just things that I thought of and don’t have any sources from the show (ex: Spencer doing school from home to help his mom, and the independent study thing from Spring 2002 to Summer 2002).

Again: a lot of this may be inaccurate, if there is anything you want to add or correct, feel free to do so. I spent only around 5 or so hours on this, it’s not perfect.

I love Spencer Reid. Thank you for coming to my TED talk. 

(if anyone is curious about how I write Spencer, my writing blog is @deepcreekvultures-writing )

[iamnmbr3]

You might not be interested in this ship, but I was wondering what are your thoughts on lucissa? It seems many people think that it was a marriage of convenience and that they didn’t really like each other.

It probably was a marriage of convenience to some extent - I mean, there are only so many eligible pureblood bachelors, especially if you're a Black and thus have very high standards in terms of who has an acceptable level of wealth and social standing and blood purity. Interestingly Lucius is the first Malfoy on the official Black family tree. I've always liked to headcanon that the Malfoys were a bit newer on the scene compared to the Blacks and thus slightly looked down on and that it was a big victory for Lucius to finally land a Black as a bride. I also like to imagine that maybe Abraxas had designs on Walburga but couldn't get it to work. It's a good match for Narcissa and for Lucius. Perhaps given Lucius's accepting attitudes towards Snape in the book 7 flashback as opposed to Bellatrix calling Harry a filthy half-blood, the Malfoys might be considered a bit too liberal for the tastes of some more conservative family members, but are able to make up for it with their tremendous wealth. That said, it's certainly a respectable, acceptable marriage by her family's standards, and probably a mark of how the Malfoys have come up in the world.

That doesn't mean that there wasn't also affection there too. They certainly don't seem to dislike each other - and are definitely seen together a lot more than Bellatrix and her husband for example. Narcissa certainly gets angry on several occasions when Lucius is insulted in her presence. I do think she is markedly more protective of Draco, much quicker to speak up in his defense no matter the circumstances, and more concerned with his safety and his interests. You could say that's just due to the different relationship that a parent and child have versus a wife and husband, and while that is undoubtedly part of it, I also tend to think that her love for Draco is perhaps a bit stronger and more uncomplicated than her feelings for Lucius. She likes Lucius, and she cares about him. But I'm not sure it's a great love for the ages.

Especially in the later books when she has to step out of her traditional pureblood wife role I think perhaps she starts to find him a bit lacking and her respect for him diminishes a bit. I think they are both changed by the war. She draws on skills and fortitude she never knew she had. And in contrast he becomes diminished, unable to navigate the complex and dire situation he has unintentionally condemned his family to, and too overwhelmed and afraid to truly try. For example in the beginning of book 7 it is she who is able to discern how they should react and who has to take charge of the situation. It is she who is looking out for her family, with little support from Lucius who seems mostly concerned with looking inwards. (Admittedly Lucius has the most to worry about since Voldemort's anger is especially focused on him.) This may leave Narcissa feeling isolated and frustrated and make her respect Lucius less than she once did.

I think Draco takes after his mother a lot more than his father - especially in terms of his magical skill, his aptitude for occlumency, his resourcefulness and creativity. And I think he's more appreciated by his mother. Lucius always struck me as a bit colder towards Draco - willing to send him far away to Durmstrang till Narcissa intervened and publicly humiliating him in book 2 etc. I think perhaps part of Lucius's affection for Draco is more for the idea of him as the Malfoy heir than as an actual person. And I'm sure Lucius is disgusted by Draco's lack of stomach for true violence or cruelty. After all, Lucius's idea of a good time is getting drunk and engaging in a bit of muggle torture with his mates. This too probably proves a source of tension, especially in the later books.

However, I really can't imagine them with anyone else. I think they are both generally aligned in their world views and attitudes. While the marriage may well have been semi-arranged I think both believed in the process and probably went into the marriage with enthusiasm. And I think they're happy to continue the relationship after the war though I'm not sure either would contemplate dying for the other or anything like that. I also don't think interpretations where Lucius is going around terrorizing his family or beating/torturing/abusing Draco fit with canon. I don't think he would do that. Nor do I think that Narcissa would allow it if he tried.

I think their relationship is flawed - but so are they. A nice little, 'awful people being awful together' ship. And I think iterations of them where they are a bit more lovey dovey with each other than I see them are also a valid reading that has a good basis in canon too.

[sinnabarmoth]

Quick questions

Which of the love interests do you think would be the best partner for the current timeline MC?

And which love interest would be most likely to find and love someone other than MC? (Not even taking their past into consideration, I feel like they have very small social circles that doesn’t allow for a lot of romance options)

Long answer cause I have to explain my thought process. I realized I had a lot of thoughts on this.

If we are talking current timeline and aren't taking into account any of their past lives, I'm going to say Rafayel. Now! This is by process of elimination I came to this decision. So let's go through it.

Zayne is out because he's MC's PCP. Just no. Do not date your PCP. I don't care if they were childhood friends or whatever, don't do it.

Next out is Sylus because they're on opposite sides of the law. That's only going to cause problems in the future. Not worth the trouble.

Now this was a hard cut because I love Xavier with all my heart but thinking logically, he is MC's coworker. And considering they have a dangerous job it's probably best they're not skewing their best judgement by being super worried about each other during missions.

So that left Rafayel who honestly outside of him hiring her as his "bodyguard" (which let's be real he's doing that primarily just to have an excuse to call her over whenever he wants) they have no real professional entanglements so the chance for a healthy relationship without professional conflict is him.

(Also another side note, Rafayel is at the bottom of my love interest tier list, mainly because I look at him the same way I look at Astarion from BG3. I'm not going to fuck this man. We're gonna sit on the couch with face masks, drink wine, and watch the Bachelor. He is my sassy best friend!)

ANYHOO!

The love interest that would move on from MC is a little harder to pin down. But again, not taking into account past lives and treating these guys as if this is the only life they've ever lived, I think I have to say Sylus oddly enough.

Xavier has a history of not really hanging out with people and keeping to himself so he isn't going to go out of his way to find a new girlfriend.

Same for Zayne who is just really focused on his work. He's more likely to get a pet than to try and find a girlfriend.

For Rafayel I think that he could go either way. He's very invested in his art but I think if he met someone he really connected with he'd go off on his whole, "she's my muse" thing and we'd never hear him shut about her again.

Now Sylus I can see meeting someone who is snarky, quick witted, and confident and he'd be all in immediately. He met this girl at gas station while filling up his bike and he cut her off to get to the pump and she'd come out of her car cussing him out mercilessly. Man would have full heart eyes immediately. This man WANTS a girlfriend that will call him a dickhead then demand cuddles and he will find one. Or Luke and Kieran will put an ad in the paper and find him one.

[mimisempai]

It's just a risk to take 1/2

Summary

For the fifth year in a row, Crowley's mother insists on inviting him to her charity gala. Although he has refused each time, this time he has no choice. And if he doesn't want his mother to force a date on him, he'll have to bring someone. So he takes the risk of inviting his old friend Aziraphale, for whom he feels much more than friendship. 

Notes

A little Human AU of them getting together

On Ao3

Rating G - 1783 words

Chap 2

"Anthony!"

Though startled by his mother's voice, Anthony did not react and continued to read the newspaper, sitting on his sofa with his feet up on the coffee table.

He heard the door close, then the click of heels coming closer, and only looked up when his mother tossed a sheet of paper into his lap.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw that it was the negative response he'd sent to her invitation to the fall charity ball she hosted every year.

Continuing to leaf through the paper as if nothing had happened, he asked, "To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit, my dear mother?"

With her hands on her hips, his mother replied in a voice whose irritation she couldn't quite shake, “This is the fifth year you've refused my invitation and said you'd come next year. Five times!"

Anthony slowly lifted his eyes to his mother and looked at her with an assurance he was far from feeling.

"After four rejections, didn't you think there was no point in sending me a fifth invitation?"

"You know very well that I don't take no for an answer."

"And yet you'll have to do it again this time. I haven't changed my mind."

Crowley closed the newspaper and stood up before throwing it on the sofa and going to the kitchen to have some coffee. Of course, his mother followed him, and he felt that this time he'd really have a hard time staying firm. After all, he took after her as much for her flaming hair as for her stubborn nature.

He filled two cups of coffee and handed her one, which she eagerly grabbed.

He sat down on one of the high stools behind the counter as his mother leaned across from him.

She sighed.

"Anthony, I don't understand, you're smart, you're good at what you do, you're a handsome man..."

"Thanks, Mom." 

"Don't interrupt me! I was saying that you're a fine person, that you're good company when you're not hiding behind your sarcasm, that you have a job that you thrive at, and yet you're hiding in your apartment like an old bachelor."

Anthony replied with all the calm he could muster, "I am hiding, as you say, because in case you didn't know, with my job as a teacher, I see enough people during the day, my social circle is kept to a minimum because I prefer quality over quantity, and most importantly, I'm a big boy and I live my life as I see fit."

His mother took a sip of coffee, set the cup down on the counter with a clatter, and replied, "I never thought my son, so full of quality, would become a homebody. So boring. What a disappointment." 

Anthony knew his mother was being dramatic and didn't mean a word she said, she was just trying to provoke him until he gave in, so he took absolutely no offense.

He raised his eyebrows.

"If you find me boring, that's your problem, not mine."

"And when I'm gone, who's going to take care of your social life, right? You'll be all alone."

Oh, here we were. The feelings card.

He couldn't help but smile slightly and replied, "Mom, this may be hard for you to believe, but I like my solitude. And like I said, I have a few friends. You can count them on the fingers of one hand. But I have a few."

"At least give me one good reason, one real reason why you shouldn't come to this ball." His mother said as she went to refill her cup.

Anthony sighed, "If you must know, it's because I'm sure you want to set me up with some great party you found on Single.com or one of your dating apps."

His mother rolled her eyes.

"If that's all it is, just come with a date. It's as simple as that."

Anthony chuckled.

"Very funny, really."

His mother said in a softer tone, "I'm serious, you know. There must be someone whose company you can stand to spend an evening with."

Anthony immediately thought of someone, but did his best not to react.

Aziraphale.

No, don't think about it. He's just a friend. There's a big gap between being a friend and being someone's plus one for an event like this.

Forget about it.

"Ooooh, I see, so there is someone."

Damn, she really was too sharp.

His mother put down her cup, then came over and planted a kiss on his cheek before turning away.

"It's perfect. I'll wait for you and Aziraphale at the party."

"I never said it was Azi"

"Don't forget to remind your bookseller that formal wear is required."

"He's not my bookseller."

"You didn't deny it was about him, did you?"

"Mom..."

"I know, I know, honey."

Clack.

As quickly as she'd arrived, the hurricane that was his mother was gone.

She was probably already calling her friends to brag about having had the last word with her stubborn son. 

Anthony buried his head in his hands. He would have to contact Aziraphale and risk jeopardizing one of the longest and best friendships of his life.

The longest and most beautiful, in fact.

To do so, he would have to try to ignore the feelings he had for his friend. Feelings that went far beyond simple friendship.

Easier said than done.

Anthony sighed once more before he picked up his phone and started typing.

*********

Aziraphale was sitting at a table at the Dirty Donkey with Nina, Maggie and Muriel when his cell phone began to vibrate. 

He pulled it out of his pocket and, seeing who the message was from, quickly slid his thumb across the screen. He was so excited that he almost dropped the phone.

Nina noticed his fussiness and tried to look over his shoulder.

"I've never seen you in such a hurry to read a message. Who is it?"

"Oh, someone important, no doubt," Maggie replied before pulling Nina away to let Aziraphale read his message in peace. 

Muriel, for their part, made no comment, just looked at him with a knowing smile, they knew him too well. They knew who could make Aziraphale react like that. 

Aziraphale was astonished because, unlike Crowley's usual short, concise text messages, this one was so long that he had to scroll to get to the end.

His amazement grew as he read on.

His heart was beating faster as well.

But he chose to ignore it.

Aziraphale, you'll probably be surprised at what 

I'm about to ask you, but I don't have the courage to ask you in person. 

I don't know how else to say it, but I need your help. 

Would you be willing to accompany me to my mother's fall charity gala? 

It seems I can't avoid it this year, and while I'm at it, I'd rather go with a friend. 

You, in this case. 

Let me know your answer, and if it's positive, I'll send you the details.

Aziraphale swallowed. Several times.

He kept looking at the phone in his hand as he took a big gulp of sherry. 

Then he read the message again. His heart was racing now.

He had forgotten that he wasn't alone and was startled when Nina said, "You're all red, Aziraphale."

Maggie giggled and nodded.

A hand came to rest on his arm and a soft voice said, "You look... happy."

He looked up to meet the eyes of his best friend, Muriel.

"Yes. I think... maybe..."

Unable to find the words, he handed them the phone.

Muriel read it, looking very focused, before exclaiming, "That's great, Aziraphale! It's a great opportunity."

Of course his friend and business partner would say that.

They were, after all, the one who had pushed him to approach Crowley the day he had first walked into the bookstore.

Six years ago. He'd just started working as an astrophysics teacher and was looking for old books. Then he'd come back several times just to see Aziraphale, and a deep friendship had developed. Crowley had become part of his little circle of friends, and not a week went by without them seeing each other. Sometimes just the two of them, sometimes with their friends.

It was only during exam periods like now that their meetings were far apart.

And no, Aziraphale didn't count the days. Or hours, for that matter.

"Come on, Aziraphale, don't keep it a secret." 

Nina insisted, and he could see in Maggie's sparkling eyes that she was just as curious as her wife.

When Muriel handed the phone back, he hesitated for a moment, then finally passed it to Nina, who read the message as Maggie moved closer to read it at the same time.

"Aha... and are you going to say yes?"

Aziraphale didn't hide his astonishment at Nina and Maggie's lack of surprise.

"What? You think it's a secret that you have a crush on him?"

"Huh?"

Maggie continued, "There are even bets on which one of you will make the first move?"

"What?"

Dumbfounded, he glanced at Muriel, who shrugged.

"Neither of you are subtle."

"What do you mean?"

Maggie nodded, "Well, sometimes he looks at you like he hasn't eaten in days and you're the first meal he's seen."

"You've got to be kidding me!"

"I swear it's true!"

Nina nudged his shoulders and repeated, "So you'll answer yes?"

She added, insisting, "Do you realize this could be your chance?"

Maggie continued, "This could be a date!"

Aziraphale downed the rest of his sherry in one gulp and replied a little dizzily, "I certainly hope so."

He was far less certain as he prepared to answer a few moments later in the privacy of his apartment.

No matter how much he told himself not to get his hopes up, it was too late, and the only thing he could do was at least try to remain fairly neutral in his message.

Crowley, we're friends, you know you can ask me anything.

And knowing your mother, I'm guessing you fought bravely. 😛

I'm delighted to accept your invitation.

It will be an opportunity to spend an evening together, 

we haven't seen each other for a month, 

we'll have a lot to talk about.

Send me the details of the evening.

Good night!

Aziraphale hit 'send' immediately, before he had time to change his mind, placed his phone on the nightstand without waiting for a reply, and turned off the light. 

Probably due to Sherry's overindulgence, he quickly fell asleep in a peaceful slumber whose dreams had the face of a teacher with red flaming hair and honey-colored eyes.

_________

Still not beta'd

Still not my native language

Still hoping you'll enjoy this story  🥰

Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝

Ineffable fan fictions Masterpost : here

[olderthannetfic]

I'm a trans man and back when everyone thought I was a girl, I'd get asked all the time why I didn't have kids yet and told how much more fulfilling my life would be if I was a parent.

Now that everyone thinks I'm a cis man, they ask why I'm not married and tell me how much more fulfilling my life would be if I had a wife.

It's ultimately the same question, "why aren't you doing the socially accepted thing that everyone is supposed to want?", and my answer hasn't changed, it's always been "because I like being a bachelor with a cat".

But seeing the narrative shift from childbearing to marriage was.... weird.

There's almost no pressure to become a father, only to become a husband. In fact, there's an expectation that men do not want to parent children. I wouldn't go so far as to say that fatherhood is stigmatised or anything, but it's not valued or expected. The socially accepted thing is that a man has minimal interest in raising his own children.

It's only in the last ten years or so that I've started seeing diaper changing tables in men's restrooms. Fatherhood is so ignored people don't even provide basic amenities for men to care for their babies.

So they want me to become a husband, my wife to become a mother, and then me to just leave her to it all on her own I guess? That sort of situation happens all the time, and it sucks for everyone involved.

And, yeah, it was just bizarre to shift from a constant "your life is incomplete without children, you HAVE to want children, everyone wants children, reproduction is a biological imperative, you're denying your own humanity by not having had kids yet" to just.... none of that. Men are supposed to want to form long term relationships with women and have lots of PIV sex, but aren't supposed to want to have anything to do with the children their wives are supposed to be so desperate for.

It's screwed up on all sides.

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