#i would say i am equally a fan of them both actually

[jojotichakorn]

As Tumblr user @ronaan and a huge video game nerd, how is it that you are more of a Pond fan than a Phuwin fan?

well, first of all, phuwin is a multiplayer shooter girlie, and i am a singleplayer rpg girlie. that's like asking why someone who only reads colleen hoover can't talk about books with someone who only reads albert camus. (/lh) second of all, there is a weeb distribution system set up somewhere, and i get a new one every year. don't know what that's about. i have barely seen any anime in my life.

[amarynthian-chronicles]

Tip the Scales Chapter 1

Prosecutor Sun, Prosecutor Moon, Judge Eclipse x Defense Lawyer (Devil's Advocate) Reader

(You are a charismatic defense lawyer in a constant competition with two ruthless prosecutors that do not understand your ideals about criminals deserving a second chance. You are also housemates with a certain bitter and retired judge, who has a habit of operating at night as a cloaked figure known as the Judge of the Damned. Things get complicated when your old friend Monty gets accused of a murder he claims to not have committed willingly. Will you balance the scales once more?)

Warnings: suggestive themes, possessive behaviour, mentions of violence

There was a particular universal truth that court employees would never dare to admit about court proceedings: not a single one of them actually wanted to be there. Those that did enjoy being present during a session were either lying to themselves or were being paid obscene amounts of cash to pretend to care. In other extreme cases, it was all a part of unhinged ambition sprinkled with a dash of insanity.

Normally the whole process was a dreary affair, varying from sordid and depressing, all the way to showing what an administrative inferno the whole institution had become over time. True to the Dickensian fashion of describing things, one could say that the gloomy and omnipresent fog that had consumed the city with the arrival of Fall was equally present in the courtroom itself, both metaphorically and literally, entering every pore and chilling everyone to the bone.

However, in our specific situation things were getting quite heated. The cold September fog had been rudely pushed aside by the steam of intense and fiery debate you were having with prosecuting attorney Sun.

A bitter rivalry existed between you and the celestial-themed animatronic, but over the past year it seemed to have bloomed into obsessive fascination on Sun's part. We could classifiy it as another universal truth that one was bound to eventually become infatuated and captivated by their “nemesis“.

Placing you two in the same room was a very bad idea. Or a very good idea, it honestly depended on who you asked. For instance, the general public that had come to listen to your long nonsensical argument had arrived there for the sole purpose of finding out whether you two would passionately kiss somewhere in the middle of the whole discussion.

The suspense was maddening, the tension was more than palpable. One of the clerks was fanning himself with a folder, wondering whether or not he had taken his heart medication earlier.

“Could somebody open a window, please?“

There had always been an unusually thin line between love and hatred, enemies and lovers, but somehow it seemed oddly fitting for you and Sun to combine both at the same time with no problem.

After a well crafted comeback, believing himself to be the victor, Sun winked at you, triumphant and his grin wide and sinister.

“Was that as good for you as it was for me?“

“My dear sir, I cannot say, I hardly even felt anything.“

“I was under the impression that we have long abandoned this little “playing hard to get“ scenario.“

“Goodness, that sounds serious, delusions could be a sign of a system malfunction, you should get that checked, Sun.“

“Don't be so high and mighty. You will lose today, both the case and the little bet we made.“

“Oh, my, so ominous. I sure am devastated on the inside, inconsolable, I shall probably never recover.“

You were driving him insane. Healthy competition was usually highly encouraged, but this was beyond ridiculous. No matter how eloquent and skillful he was in the art of rhetoric, you refused to yield. You were still a relatively young jurist, having passed the bar examination barely two years prior, but your legal reasoning was unusually innovative and your application of creative solutions to impossible problems was astounding. There wasn't a single thing that Sun could throw at you without you catching it and throwing it ten times harder right back at him.

The judge, an elderly man that was diligently counting down the days till it was socially acceptable to retire from what was regularly a life tenure, was listening to the two of you bicker as if it were the latest installment of his favourite picture show series. He wondered if he should simply let you silly lovebirds borrow his chambers for a minute or two. Or thirty, wherever the feeling takes you. He was very supportive.

He was also the only judge in the building willing to tolerate the nonsense that you and the Celestial Prosecutors kept pulling off in the courtroom. It was free entertainment and he needed some amusement in his old age. The rest of the judicial assembly would have to pull straws each time a new case had to be assigned.

He remembered how different things had been a few years prior.

It was an open secret that the judicial assembly missed the old days when the esteemed Judge Eclipse had still been in office, before his abrupt retirement under unusual circumstances. Eclipse would always volunteer to do all the work, snatching case files from everybody's hands and closing himself in his chambers, leaving the possibility for the rest of the assembly to simply enjoy their coffee and gossip in the conference room.

Intense and immensely dedicated to his work, unyielding, unforgiving and merciless, Eclipse had been akin to a dark deity of the afterlife, deciding the fate of souls that had succumbed to corruption. His golden eyes had held nothing but pure contempt for evildoers, his mechanical heart perpetually hungry for the suffering of the wicked. Court sessions under his administrations had been a thing of horror for some and an example of a job well-done for others. Deranged and disproportionate punishments had made Eclipse quite unpopular in the criminal milieu, and there had been quite a few attempts on his life that would usually end up with the assassins themselves having their spines twisted into a pretty pretzel.

Self-defense, clear-cut, no questions asked, nobody left to mourn a few dismembered rulebreakers.

The euphoria had been too intoxicating, the flesh of Evil too delicious, the screams of the damned a symphony unmatched.

One thing had lead to another, interfering into interrogations, conflict of interest, violating every possible rule of criminal procedure, prisoners being found dead in their cells, acquitted individuals dying under suspicious circumstances mere days after their release.

The courthouse and law enforcement would always turn a blind eye. Whispers in the corridors, silent gasps in the archive rooms, everybody knew of Eclipse's tendencies, his desire to play god. Nobody had dared to make a fuss about the whole situation, not even when a few fellow judges that had been accused of bribery had one day "mysteriously" disappeared. It was all a silent approval. Crime statistics had been fixing themselves, who would dare interfere?

Deciding to return to topics less grim and vile, the current judge smiled fondly at the prosecutors and the sly defense lawyer before him. Such a sweet change, whimsy and passion reigning supreme, banishing the sepulchral dread of olden times.

Contrary to custom, Sun was working with his brother Moon by his side. It was definitely unusual for two prosecutors to work together on same cases and appear in court as a team, but nobody had ever complained about it and regulations had no explicit rule against it. It was Moon's duty to make a thorough research and keep Sun informed of any new facts or legal acts in order for Sun to prepare a proper presentation to enthrall everyone in the courtroom or ask for appropriate actions.

They used all of their individual strengths and skills to achieve the best results. Reminiscent of their older brother's inclinations, their methods and ruthless determination in the pursuit of their version of justice at all costs had become notorious, eventually making the general public refer to them as the Grand Inquisitors.

All of that aside, the two of them still had to make sure that each investigation went perfectly by the books and that there were no irregularities made by law enforcement in the initial stages of each investigation. Being a prosecutor was akin to being a sea captain that constantly kept hoping that his crew was sober. One single mistake meant that the other party would pounce on it like a feral animal.

And pounce you did.

For instance, you were easily capable of rendering a whole confession useless by claiming it was inadmissible evidence obtained through coercion. It was no trouble for you to stage a whole scene.

You had pulled off such a stunt a few times in the past and the results would always follow a hilarious pattern: the confused police officers would simply blink and question their general reality on whether they had truly applied excessive force, the public audience would try not to snack too loudly on the popcorn they had brought, the defendant would do his best to keep crying and keeping his story straight about how absolutely devastated and tortured he was, the judge would hope that no reporters would come crawling in the courtroom and asking about human rights violations. Again.

The celestial twins were unused to such audacity and blows to their pride. Sun and Moon had always been a powerful force that had never known the meaning of failure, the playing field had been theirs to dominate and it was pure madness to even think that anyone could place an end to that. And then you showed up and suddenly the courtroom was a circus, you were the ringmaster and you turned the two of them into the lead jesters of the whole show.

They were furious with you for making a mockery of their act. How dare you?

Moon did his best to remain subtle with his temper, even if his pencils did audibly snap in half from time to time. He had to keep an appearance a patient man, someone courteous and polite. It was of great importance to keep that thick layer of ice above the boiling madness that stirred deep within.

Oh, how you tested his patience still. It all kept accumulating, over and over, cracking the ice bit by bit.

He could write a masterpiece of scholarly analysis and a seemingly perfect reconstruction of events, and you would destroy all of that effort simply by telling him he wrote a date wrong, messing up the entire chronology and all further conclusions, rendering the whole thing useless. You always tripped him with the little things, formalities, so many tidbits that made the whole construction fall apart.

The devil was in the details, after all.

Speaking of which, since the majority of your clients were desperate people that had strayed from the morals of society into a life of crime for mere survival, you had earned yourself the title of Devil's Advocate among your colleagues. The world of your clients, however, was quite grateful for your services and assistance, all of them calling you their Fairy Godparent.

You got them out of trouble, you found them alternatives and new respectful jobs, you gave and gave, granting wishes and making them all happily dance to your music. If anyone had issues or needed help, they knew who to come to. You were waiting with good life advice, cupcakes, a hot cup of coffee and assurance that you would solve all of their problems. In many cases, you were the last angel before the gates of Hell for them, grasping their hand and pulling them back to safety.

After all, placing their fate in your hands was a far better alternative than sinking deeper into darkness and one day being inevitably visited in the middle of the night by the Judge of the Damned, having their life taken as the midnight bells rang.

Because of this looming threat, you did your best to save each soul you came across.

In this particular case, it was a young man that had gotten himself in some serious trouble after associating with a dangerous faction of drug dealers. Such business always came with its risks and there was no true loyalty nor help if someone got caught. Moreover, it was common practice to silence the person from revealing the others by simply ordering their assassination in prison. The young man had gotten way in over his head, too ambitious and too confident in his own abilities, intoxicated with the romantic ideas of what he had seen in movies.

His older brothers had approached you for help after his arrest and you had accepted, of course. You would get the boy out of trouble, free of charge, under the condition that he dedicated himself to getting his life back on track and you would be making sure things stayed that way.

Sun was still waiting for you to speak, and the rest of the room was wondering whether or not you were truly speechless this time or if you were simply preparing something spectacular. Of course, it was the latter. You had pulled a lot of strings and cashed in a few favours, but it was all for a good cause. You heard Sun's impatient voice:

“Ready to admit defeat? There is no conceivable way for you to counter any of this evidence, it is over.“

“Only for those that lack the imagination to do so. I call in question the credibility and the competence of your toxicology expert. You cannot claim that my client was in possession or consuming a certain substance, if its chemical components do no even match what you claim it to be.“

“Pure cocaine was found on his person. He has been known to associate himself with dangerous smugglers of forbidden narcotics.“

“A second analysis, that I took the liberty of ordering from another expert, proved that it was mere flour.“

“Excuse me?“

“He is a baker's apprentice. Poor boy, he is just keeping all of that secret out of shame, which is why we did not mention this earlier, by the way. Alas, I cannot keep this silence anymore, for I must act in his best interest. You see, ever since he was a small lad, it was his dream to make fine Danish pastries, but everyone in his general vicinity was obsessed with the whole “dashing gangster“ persona that is so popular right now, so no wonder that this sad young man, just look at his eyes, this poor innocent child tried to emulate all of that simply to get some respect from his cruel peers. So, he walked around with flour and pretended that it was cocaine. It is all because of societal pressure.“

Had Sun been gifted with a detachable jaw, it would have fallen on the floor by now. It was madness. Your claim was pure madness. He wasn't certain, but he did feel as if all of his systems were about to crash down in a sad attempt at self-preservation. Moon's crimson eyes had turned black and he seemed as if he were silently rebooting himself. It was best for everyone to have him unconscious for a bit, otherwise he would have probably gotten violent. The stenographer stopped typing and blinked at you in a very “what the actual hell“ manner and the old judge took his glasses off emphatically as people normally do in such situations for no specific reason other than dramatic effect.

“God, I haven't felt this much excitement since my last divorce.“

The defendant was very much surprised to hear this as well. He gestured for you to come closer and whispered to you:

“I am a baker's apprentice?“

“You are now. Be the role, become the role, make the rolls. Also, you start next Monday at five in the morning, I got everything already arranged with the baker on main street. This whole process should by over by then.“

“What? The only dough I know how to roll is the monetary one.“

“You learn while you live.“

The poor man looked at you with the expression of someone that would really rather just go to prison than go through such blood pressure oscillations.

His brothers, three friendly chaps in dashing suits, homburg hats and leather gloves, were all smiling and holding a thumbs up in encouragement. He turned around to look at them with a genuinely desperate expression. Listening to this nonsense was punishment enough, regardless if he did the crime or not. They had assured him that you were the best, but nobody ever said that your methods were the sanest.

You cleared your throat and spoke up again:

“In light of this and to support these claims, I enclose all the necessary documents and I am prepared to call the relevant new witnesses if you agree, Your Honour.“

“I can adjourn, I personally got no problem with continuing this on a later day of the week. I have to tell you, you kids are keeping me young, I always thought that my later years in life would be boring. Boy, I sure was wrong.“

A partially drunk man from the spectator area began to clap.

“Bravo!“

The bailiff looked over at him.

“What are you clapping for?“

“I thought this was the theatre.“

“It's a courtroom, is what it is.“

“What's the difference?“

Just as you were about to sit down, Moon was suddenly by your side, having miraculously finished his little reboot session and feeling more energized than ever. It was rather concerning, since he was capable of pulling such a stunt within mere seconds, changing location so fast before you could even register it. You had a theory that he was probably capable of some type of flight or teleportation.

You made a little squeak of surprise as you felt his hands on your shoulders, pulling you close to his face plate, crimson eyes trying to cut your soul to shreds. Nevertheless, you refused to lose your decorum and you kept up an air of aristocratic disinterest.

“May I help you, sir?“

“Don't give me that. You know exactly what you are doing. I am not letting you humiliate us like this again.“

“And you are going to make things better for yourself by intimidating me in public like this? I really want to know what the plan is, I'm curious now.“

“Curiosity will kill you one day, little devil fairy.“

“I am certain that satisfaction will bring me back. What exactly do you want from me?“

He squeezed your shoulders and began to lightly massage them. It was oddly pleasurable, since you were tense and tired. Moon's voice was low, raspy, almost a whisper, akin to that of a nocturnal demon that haunted the shadows and ruled over nightmares.

“What goes around comes around and one day I will humiliate you, as well. I will tear those fairy wings apart.“

“Do you think I am afraid of you?“

“You should be. But, yes, I do have an additional request. Meet us in the conference room as soon as we are done here. We wish to talk.“

For a moment it seemed as if the two of you had forgotten that you were in an oddly compromising embrace in front of the entire courtroom. The same man from the spectator area whispered to the bailiff:

“Is this when the smooching starts? I could have sworn I read it somewhere in the play synopsis.“

“This is not the theatre!“

“Listen, Shakespeare once said that the whole world is a stage. He also said that we should kill all the lawyers, though, but I vote that we keep these three here, I need to know what happens next.“

A normal person would refuse to accept Moon's request after his little outburst, but you wished to talk to him and Sun, as well. Perhaps the old saying of “keep your friends close and your enemies closer“ had some wisdom to it, but you also genuinely wished to somewhat make peace with them. Maybe even explain your perspective and your ideas of justice to them. If things got really wild, possibly even form some fragile bond of friendship.

“Alright, I will be there, I just need some time to get my things first and I will also fetch a cup of coffee.“

You pushed him away and he allowed you to do so. However, his gaze was still on you even as everyone had risen and prepared to leave for the day. He watched you as you cheerfully talked with your client and his family, so warm, so caring. They gave you presents to show their appreciation, bags full of chocolates, teddy bears and a ridiculously large plush rabbit. Such whimsical things, childish and ridiculous, and yet your eyes almost had sparkles from how happy you were.

You were considered a beauty by many, but you were not coquettish, ignoring any amorous comments with your usual aristocratic disdain. Your hair was long and soft, well taken care of, but there were always a few little disobedient tufts that almost appeared like tiny and cute devil horns. It was impossible to straighten them out and you simply let them be.

You had a penchant for black pinstripe suits. However, the professional sterness was mitigated by the presence of a star-shaped pink diamond brooch pinned to the striped bow on your chest area. Moon found it conveniently suitable for your “fairy godparent“ aesthetic. The diamond would catch even the faintest amounts of light, reflecting it on surrounding walls to signify that you were approaching. You were wondrous, gentle hues of pink always heralding your arrival.

Sun spoke to him as the two of them made their way to the conference room, distracting him from his reveries:

“They are so cold to us and yet so warm to them. Did you see that smile?“

“Our fairy sees value in miscreants and mongrels. It is only a matter of time before those strays bite the hand that feeds them and then the little fool will come crying to us.“

“It would be cruel of us to refuse them a warm embrace, brother.“

Moon pondered the thought, the potential image of you in a disheveled state, disappointed and heartbroken. There was something wonderfully poetic about the idea of your rose garden withering away. It was a fair trade for all the times you kept trying to ruin their own view of the world. He and Sun were the righteous hands of justice and not even you could protect your little army of demons forever, shielding them with your dark angel wings till one day their final feather crumbles to dust. A misguided fallen little seraph had to have limits.

Sun and Moon waited for good while for you to arrive. Getting coffee was serious business, after all.

The windows in the conference room were covered with Venetian blinds, creating a game of light and shadow, giving it an air of mystery and melancholy. However, the moment you entered, your diamond brooch cast little sparkles of warm pink all over the walls.

You were carrying the bags with gifts and also balancing your coffee cup. It was honestly a miracle you did not spill everything yet. You set it all on the large table and for a moment you almost seemed to have forgotten the two animatronics even existed as you were fiddling with the little treats you had received.

“These chocolates are my favourite. It is a shame you two can't eat, you are missing pure heaven. Now, what exactly did you two want to talk about?“

Sun was very straightforward and went right down to business.

“You cheated, lied and manipulated facts today.“

“Me? I can only aspire to be that productive in one single afternoon.“

“Furthermore, you shamelessly tried to avoid the consequences of losing our little bet.“

“Tell me something: are you more upset about the case or the bet? It seems to me as if the latter is tormenting you more than the former.“

“I am not answering that.“

“If you wanted a date, all you had to do was ask like a sensible man, we don't need these convoluted schemes for something that simple.“

“Would you, then?“

“No.“

“See, this is why we need the schemes.“

“Such a tragedy your problems are, Sun.“

You opened another box of chocolates and you were wondering whether to try the one with dark ganache filling or the one with hazelnut cream. You were rudely interrupted when Moon lifted your chin up to look at him.

“You are no longer going to prance around acting as if the justice system is your own personal circus. If we expose what you did today, you will be kicked out of the Lawyers' Association and you will lose your license to practice.“

“That sounds so depressing when you put it that way.“

“I personally can appreciate what you were trying to do for all those people in the past year or so, but enough is enough. We could have offered you a plea bargain, had you only asked us. We are more than happy to settle if those puppies of yours mean that much to you, but they will need to serve time, whether you like it or not.“

“When they get in the system, it's over, it will haunt them and follow them for the rest of their lives, from getting employment all the way to daily life and relationships.“

“None of that is your concern, Y/N. You cannot save everyone.“

“With all due respect, Moon, you have no right to tell me what to do. I do not hate you, but I will not tolerate you being in my way either. Do not be fooled by my kind nature, you have no idea who you are playing with. Dreams can become Nightmares fairly quickly.“

“I am saying all of this because I do not want you to share the same unfortunate fate that keeps repeating itself in your family. Always best friends with the wrong lot. You need to stop fraternizing with criminals, for your own good.“

Moon expected a specific reaction from you with that statement, foolishly assuming that he would hit the right spot, that he would cause fear, pain, uncertainty and a need to run somewhere for some emotional safety. Even Sun knew that he had gone too far with that topic.

You were not having it. Yes, you were a regal and delicate flower. However, that flower was also poisonous and with plenty of thorns. You huffed at him.

“Oh, so we are playing that card now? While we are on the subject of family tradition and dubious practices, I am well aware of the person that gets rid of the truly bad people. Did he ever come for any of my current and recent clients? No. Therefore I don't see why you are so determined to lecture me about helping those that only do crime out of necessity, not evil. If anything, this is just petty revenge because you hate losing and because you are a manipulative jerk with no empathy for the misfortunate, Moon. If you wish to punish someone, start with yourself.“

That certainly did hit a nerve.

Moon went over to the window, pulling the blinds shut and letting the room bathe in darkness, the pink light disappearing. You blinked to adjust your eyes.

“Is this really necessary?

Moon's voice was unusually low, almost a whisper:

"Is darkness not a familiar thing to you, little devil fairy? You certainly seem to linger in the shadows, refusing to see the light, you are blind and unable to grasp reality as it is."

You sighed and shrugged.

"That is still better than believing in blind justice. Also, at least I got the comfort of knowing that Sun over here cannot see anything right now, either.“

The daylight animatronic made a huff at your words.

“I still know the basic layout of the room, thank you very much.“

Sun then leaned over to you and whispered:

“Now, why did you have to tell him all that? He is very touchy on that subject.“

“Well, he started it.“

“And you had to continue it?“

“Yes. I too am allowed to be petty.“

Moon's crimson optics were the only light left and they were getting closer, wicked and menacing. Their glow suddenly disappeared and all that was heard was Moon's malicious cackling. Even with Sun present, you knew you were pretty much screwed and that it was best if you made your merry way in the opposite direction.

An interesting chain of events followed that led to even more interesting consequences. You reached for the nearby bag that had the giant bunny plushie in it, throwing it in the general direction of Moon's laughter, hoping that it would hit him and buy you enough time to run out of the room. However, you miscalculated while waving your hand, accidentally hitting Sun in the face instead. In your defense, you could barely see a damn thing in the dark.

As this happened, Sun stepped backwards out of sheer instinct, bumping right into Moon as he was trying to elegantly sneak up. This caused Moon to lose balance and fall on the floor. As he tried to catch onto the table to pull himself back up, his hand landed directly on the coffee cup and the whole contents spilled over the edge right onto him, ruining his coat, vest and shirt.

Needless to say how much noise you three idiots had made in the process.

You reached for another bag, and you began to swing it around without a care in the world.

“Stay back, both of you, I am armed with plushies and I am not afraid to use them.“

Sun's face kept being caught in the collateral damage, of course. With a swift motion, he managed to catch you and pick you up, placing you on the table and pinning your wrists to it to stop you from further attacking him with such a deadly weapon. Meanwhile, Moon was removing his coffee-stained coat and vest, lamenting how the whole fabric was ruined now.

“This is not how I envisioned this meeting to transpire.“

The whole scene was then interrupted when a clerk opened the door, seeing the two celestial animatronics looming over you while you were lying on the table, Sun holding your wrists and Moon having half his clothes off.

The man blinked a few times, before clapping in joy.

“Oh, my god, finally. I have been placing my bets on the three of you for months. I have to tell the others that they owe me money. They said you three would get together by December, but I was a visionary and I said somewhere in Fall. Ah, passion! Such a fantastic thing. Have fun, you crazy lovebirds, you! I'll tell the group of people that is standing right outside not to disturb you for the next few hours, okay? Okay, take care.“

He closed the door and left, leaving the room in darkness again. A few moments passed and you burst out laughing, unable to control yourself. The situation was absurd and you were starting to love every minute of it.

“I must say, this madness is better than some boring date. We should do it again sometime.“

AO3 Link

[gabessquishytum]

College AU

Hob was sitting in his Speech Class bouncing his leg. They were going to deliver their big speeches today on why they were artists. Hob didn’t like looking at the guy across from him directly, he just had a dark broody aura about him. The guy dressed head to toe in black, had eyeliner dripping down his cheeks and black messy hair. Hob never talked to him really all he knew was that his name was Dream. Hob hated listening to the speeches, then Dream is called up. He talks about how art should be dark and uncomfortable, how being comfortable all the time is stupid especially in art. The direct antithesis to Hob’s which was about how art can bring hope and light to a cruel world. Hob can feel Dream glaring at him when he gives his own speech.

After class Hob is suddenly shoved and pinned against the wall.

“How dare you!”

It’s dream, he’s tiny but his grip is strong.

“You undercut everything in my speech you stupid jock! How am I supposed to be taken seriously? Art shouldn’t be turned away from the world it should reflect it!”

“Can you let go of me?”

Dream lets him go. Hob brushes himself off.

“Art should reflect the world, the world is beautiful”

Dream looks incensed.

“How could you say such a thing?”

Hob motions for Dream to follow him.

Hob takes the long walk back to the dorm full of parks and natural beauty.

“This is my walk home everyday, isn’t it lovely?”

“It would be more efficient to take the bus,” dream grumbles.

“Sure, but I’d miss out on all of this,”

He motions to the luscious greenery around them.

“I had a dream like this once” Dream muses.

“I wanna show you art the way I see it, you wanna go back to my dorm and watch a tv show?”

Dream looked reluctant.

“I don’t want sex”

“Wasn’t on the table” Hob responses quickly.

Dream looked confused. “You really just want to watch tv?”

“I mean yeah?”

“My apologies I’m just so used to guys just wanting me for-“

Hob stops him. “No need to explain love, cmon”

Hob’s dorm is colorful. It’s mesmerizing, hob leads dream to the couch sitting a respectful distance away.

“I want to introduce you to something called Fraggle Rock”

Dream gives him a look.

“That is a children’s show,”

Hob does not pay attention to him and hits play.

By the end of it Dream is inconsolable.

“They are so silly… but they love each other, their world is beautiful and bright,”

Hob simply nodded, now Dream was getting it.

Soon Dream adds more color to his wardrobe (very dark purple and blue) and Hob sees the merit in disturbing art. They’ve become a bit like each other, a balancing out force for the better. And Dream’s end of the year speech talks about how both comfort and disturbance belong in art.

-🦎anon

This is adorable. "Disturb the comforted and comfort the disturbed" is such a dreamling vibe. Both perspectives can be true and both experiences of the world are equally meaningful.

And I honestly don't think we talk enough about Hob as an artist!!!! Of course it makes sense for Dream to make art, but I truly believe that Hob would also make a wonderful artist. I can really see him as a sculpter or maybe working with ceramics - something that really gets his hands into the clay, probably making the biggest mess you can imagine. I figure he probably makes some pretty fucked up disturbing art (maybe Dream’s influence shows here), because after a long time trying to make everything positive and cheerful, he eventually sees that the truth of the world is kind of dark sometimes! And that's actually an okay thing for him to express in his work. He doesn't have to try and make everyone happy. He can just be himself!

Dream is a big fan of Hob’s dark periods and definitely ends up being one of his first customers. But he also has a soft spot for Hob’s radiant, gentle art. Hob’s art is definitely the only primary colour allowed into Dream’s house!!! Along with Hob himself, of course - he is always welcome, no matter how garish his outfits may be!

[stirringwinds]

Your thoughts on Alfreds similarity to Arthur, their dynamic and their father-son relationshio is incredible and so very enjoyable! The way Arthur sees Alfred; his hyperindependent son who rejects his fathers ideas and uplifts his own ambitions, not understanding that while his own ambition and view of the world is not completely identical to his fathers, it's a mirror image in scale and vigour. It is the same old tale of the prince beheading the king, taking the crown and vowing to never become his father, only to come full circle and have his enemies tell him "you're just like him."

Alfred may be the "black sheep" of the family, but not even Arthur can hide his favoritism for the lad. His firstborn is more like him than anyone of his children, and that bears pride, yet fear as well.

Im just trying to say that if you had a million fans, I am one of them, if you had one fan, its me, if you had zero fans im dead. <3

thank you so much! (: in return, i have to say how much i love your art, especially of the pacific siblings + the old man. you bring them to life really beautifully.

and yes! i just love the excellent contradictions that come out when digging into arthur and alfred as a father-and-son dynamic. i enjoy putting a twist on the usual tropes of the 'black sheep' and 'golden boy/crown prince', where it's often two different siblings. here, out of the 🇺🇸🇨🇦🇦🇺🇳🇿 siblings, alfred is the black sheep and the crown prince. he is the estranged eldest brother who seemingly does whatever the hell he wants. he overshadows them all even in his absence. like, for Jack and Zee especially, it's not a flattering picture of Alfred they get from Arthur. Ungrateful wretch, fool of a lad, hotheaded and arrogant, a flash in the pan...etc etc. but even quite young, before WWI or WWII, they realise that Alfred is the only one of them Arthur truly sees as anything close to an equal. that contrast is sharpened by how Arthur treats Matt—who was the 'older brother' they actually knew: the otherwise competent shocktroop of empire and first dominion shouldering various responsibilities. to defy Arthur is to earn his enmity, but also the only way to earn his respect.

like most other nations who become empires—Arthur doesn't truly believe in heirs: the sun never sets on the british empire, no? and when you are an eldritch being given life by the power of human ideas, immortality is a possibility they can't help aspiring to, no matter how much history is littered with the rise and fall of nations once arrogant enough to believe themselves invincible. and Arthur, at the height of British power, allows himself to believe that. for all his shrewdness and study of history, he's not immune to being seduced by that possibility. why shouldn't his empire be different? driven by the power of industrial civilisation that Rome could never dream of. Arthur never wanted Alfred to be his heir because he would never relinquish power willingly (just as the British Empire did not give itself up until the combined weight of world war two, anti-colonial movements and bankruptcy broke its back), but with his defiance, Alfred is the only kind of heir he would respect.

It is the same old tale of the prince beheading the king, taking the crown and vowing to never become his father, only to come full circle and have his enemies tell him "you're just like him."

indeed! i always see a real Titanomachy theme between Arthur and Alfred for that reason; the British and American empires certainly loved to perceive themselves as heirs to classical antiquity after all. the Greek story of the war between the younger generation of Olympian gods and Titans to determine who would have dominion over the universe. Zeus, with his siblings, overthrows his father Cronus— in a manner of speaking, that is what happens with WWII. Alfred is both Arthur's deliverance (lend lease, d-day...) and the one who usurps him: America replacing Britain's prime role in the Pacific, reshaping and redefining alliances with Australia, New Zealand and Canada. in the eyes of many of the Old World nations, Alfred is his father's heir. to end off, here's a short snippet from a WIP i'm working on set during the American Civil War:

Arthur laughs. “Do I make you do anything anymore, Alfred? Didn't you throw away my name almost a century ago? Did you not loudly announce yourself as a maritime power? That huge uproar you created in the Far East? Bragging to me how you’d done what I failed, dragging another Old World nation out of isolation to rejoin the international community on the threat of war and glories of foreign commerce?” Alfred opens his mouth—to say something self-righteous and hypocritical, Arthur is certain—but then he lifts his chin coolly. “As opposed to the actual war you started in China? If anything, with the Treaty of Kanagawa, I proved how one could secure foreign trading interests with both firmness but far more civilisation. You and I," Alfred sneers, “are not the same.” “An unequal treaty is an unequal treaty— that I will not deny even if I will not give up its benefits. This world is not for soft men or women, and the old warlord that Yao is—he knows that well.” Arthur smiles sharply. “Do you hate the fact that when the other Old World nations look at you, they see my blood running in your veins?"

Arthur imo, is definitely that father who plays favourites. Alfred is his greatest disappointment but also the one he loves the most—in the dysfunctional way that a man who is an empire comes closest to loving the son who mirrors him the most in his pitiless ambition and cunning. Alfred sees himself as a genuine idealist, as someone struggling to be free of his father and all his bad traits, but when Alfred rises to power, Arthur believes he's the only one who truly understands him the most. It's almost the possessive element of 'I gave you life, I named you and made you what you are, and no matter how much you scorn my name, my influence will define you forever.' Father and son, king and crown prince, regicide and patricide—but also creator and his creation made in his image.

[thecoolerliauditore]

Pls tell me about Scott's views on women in general pls I'm begging you

o7 and I'm sorry

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

fyi, the post itself isn't NSFW, but I'll be getting all gender theory in this bitch so I'll be referencing a lot of things and putting in pictures of naked ppl sometimes. maybe skip this one if you don't like that

(long post)

Disclaimers

An explanation for the tweet up there

I usually don't write these because I assume the people on my blog have enough sense to realise when I'm talking about the characters vs the CCs or are comfortable enough being a little confused, but I feel the need to extra-clarify here and expand on how I specifically view C vs CC because I think it differs a little from the average person.

To me, C and CC are two separate entities but not entirely disconnected. What differs (e.g. the exclusion of irl relationships -- their wives, kids, etc.) is poignant enough to severely detach them from the people they originated from, at least in my eyes, but there's also the fact that these are not scripted characters, just creators being themselves with a hint of behind the scenes drama-adding and improv thrown in.

For example, CC Pearl is a car nerd. So I assume her character is too.

This is where I state very clearly that yes, a lot of these thoughts come from things I've seen on Scott's twitter, which is undoubtedly the CC and not the C. However I, to me, am still talking about the C because any observations/judgments I could make on actual irl youtuber CC guy Scott Major would be tabloid at best and slightly invasive at worst. I'm seeing these statements within the context of "the death game guy would say this too and I'm writing this based on that", not "this is the inner psychological workings of the youtuber because I, as a fan, can totally tell".

TLDR I don't consider this post RPF but you might. This is a little more RPF-y than my usual stuff. If you don't rock with it we cool.

Everyone is weird about women, and that's okay

One short-hand I've used in the past to talk about Scott and women is just by saying that he's "weird about women" which I'm sure isn't exclusive to him.

(shitpost I made awhile back)

I see a lot of people now who love "villains" and "evil" but when it comes to any traits resembling real life evil (e.g. misogyny in this case) they suddenly become insecure. Just a couple of days back a saw a post on twitter essentially asking for permission to continue liking CC Scott in spite of the "bad things" he did.

And I think, in order to present an analysis like this, I must address that mindset first.

This is not a judgment on Scott's morality, nor is it trying to dissuade you from liking him. This is not saying that he is any more misogynistic than any other player in the series. This is just me pointing out Scott's attitude towards women and what I read it as, nothing less or more.

The feelings that me pointing these things out - be they apathy, disgust, anger or, what I would hope to see most, interest - are your own. I'm not here to tell anyone how to feel and never will try to police that on my blog.

Scott's Relationships with Women

aka. oh yeah this is about minecraft.

Scott and Cleo || "Yeah, you can kill me."

Scott and Cleo's alliance is arguably the strongest in the entire series, spanning through all five seasons and remaining unbroken with no (serious) drama attached. You'd expect from this that they two have a very settled and stable understanding of eachother, yet this isn't a case.

Their power dynamic shifts dramatically from one season to the next.

3L's initial Widows Alliance began on fairly equal footing, built on the mutual agreement that they were waiting for their respective partners to die. Both understood they were eachothers' "plan B" and felt comfortable in that arrangement.

Come LL, Cleo does what she couldn't in 3L, and initiates that plan, going to Scott after her last alliance, the fairy fort, fell apart. Scott requests nothing from her in return.

DL is the longest the two spent as eachothers main ally. Cleo is the one who initially proposes teaming up to spite their "cheating" soulmates and Scott agrees. Cleo admits to Martyn in private that she's aware she's taking advantage of Scott (which I've always interpreted as her talking about all seasons, not just DL). Due to the time they spend together, it's here where it becomes apparent that their initial assumptions during 3L were not entirely accurate, as Scott shows a level of gameplay competency much higher than Cleo's (e.g. teaching her how to axe-crit) but despite this Scott never berates her or thinks any less of her value as his ally.

LimL is probably this pairing at their most unhinged, as Scott, despite once again asking for nothing (or very little -- I'll be honest I'm a bit fuzzy on this) in return from Cleo, allows them and their allies to butcher him repeatedly for time. He gives more time to the Clockers than he does to Martyn, his closest ally that season. Despite this, Scott is never ever considered as a "family member" by the Clockers, despite them giving that title to even temporary allies (like the Bad Boys being their cousins) -- even Martyn gets a title with Scott completely unattached.

SL is relatively more chill, but shows that the two inevitably end up teaming together even despite their oath to avoid eachother that season.

The point being -- again and again, we see Scott literally and metaphorically making sacrifices for Cleo, with the only real transaction he requires from her being that she continues having his back when times get rough. This is despite that he's aware she isn't any more capable than he is and the fact that so far it has only been Cleo in rough times (LL, LimL and SL) and never Scott.

Speaking from a purely transactional perspective, Scott is not getting a bargain here -- and even Cleo seems acutely aware of it, judging by her comment during DL as well as the way she tends to speak of her survival capabilities very lowly in general ("rubbish pvp skills and spiffy one-liners"). I'm speaking in this sense because I've seen discussions in the past about the transactional way Scott views relationships but rarely does Cleo get brought up.

This is at stark contrast to how he treats Jimmy, whose predicted death was what spurred on Scott and Cleo's alliance in the first place.

Scott assumes Jimmy is "incompetent", where he assumes Cleo is capable. When Jimmy messes up, he reprimands him, when Cleo struggles to crit him, he patiently teaches her. When LL begins, Scott's first instinct was to look at Jimmy's lives and note that he was "useless to (him)", but holds no objections to Cleo joining his alliance despite her already having enemies being a potential liability. In SL, he jokes about how Cleo and him being allied is a given and pretty much expected of them, whereas in LimL he explicitly requests from Jimmy a recognition that he still cares ("say love you back!") before he will help him.

Scott and Gem || "You HAVE TO kill me, Gem,"

In SL, Gem settles in very easily in a leadership position within Gem and the Scotts due to her trying to live up to her reputation but also due to Scott and Impulse's more laid back, passive playstyles.

Both Scott and Impulse let Gem kill them for extra health this season, although Scott is arguably much more subservient than Impulse is, with him not only insisting that she kill him in the final episode but also not fighting back (and only yelling for her to stop) when she starts hitting him with a sword during the episode where her task was to literally kill everyone on the server.

Once again comparing her to Jimmy, Scott in 3L had a tendency to brush aside Jimmy's concerns over alliances (e.g. Jimmy questioning if they could trust Cleo) while in SL Scott runs his plans by Gem (and Pearl and Impulse) in terms of who he wanted to team up with (specifically excluding Joel from the potential mounders alliance) implying he held her opinion in some form of regard.

Before this becomes less of an analysis of Scott's treatment of men vs women and more of Scott's treatment of Jimmy vs everyone else, I think it's notable enough to mention that he and Martyn also lacked this sort of communication in LimL. He would inform Martyn of his plans, but rarely was it ever framed as a request.

SL almost feels as if Scott has slid Gem into the slot he had previously designated for Cleo in 3L (his girlboss ally) as he provides her and pretty much forces onto her by the end the acts of service he'd become accustomed to performing for Cleo.

Scott and Lizzie || "You killed her! I don't.. I don't know what to even say!"

Relatively shorter section because this is the one woman he hasn't teamed with, but there's still some interesting stuff I wanted to touch on.

In LL, one of the first thing Scott does is yell at Pearl to revenge-kill Joel for boogey-killing him. Pearl does as she's told and Joel's wet miserable pathetic LL life gets worse from there.

Several episodes later, the roles are reversed -- Lizzie lies to both of them and manages to isolate and boogey-kill Pearl. Scott, instead of reacting with the anger he had for Joel, is almost in a state of shock as he asks Lizzie to let him down so he could collect Pearl's belongings. He doesn't act aggressively towards Lizzie at all, with his most antagonizing act against her being to lie about his intentions when giving her a wither skull.

In SL, he's the only one aware of her early permadeath, but keeps quiet about it almost as if he's in a state of shock akin to when he saw Lizzie kill Pearl in LL. It's not until the others have noticed when he finally brings it up.

Scott and Pearl || "Tilly death do us 'part"

I wrote a whole post just for their relationship alone so for the sake of my sanity I'll be leaving this here.

So now I get to dedicate this section to the meat of this post -- how the way Scott treats women in general impacts his relationship with Pearl and how I view his heel-turn on her as seeping with relevance to Pearl's perceived gender.

In all three of the previous sections, the running theme is that Scott is 1. kinder and more patient with women, regardless of their competency and 2. someone who likes to be in a supporting role to women, occasionally aiding them more than he aids himself and his closer male allies (e.g. Jimmy and Martyn). As shown with Cleo, he assumes that girls have it together, but even if they don't it's not a big deal. When a girl's actions are truly disastrous, such as with Lizzie's, he goes into a state of shock and doesn't really react, preferring to swallow it down and not acknowledge it.

With the amount of times he sacrifices himself, I don't think it's a reach to say that Scott values his own life less than he values the lives of his (female) allies. This specific point actually does extend to his male allies too, shown when he's happy when Martyn literally backstabs him in LimL, but just as with the Martyn post where I point out his victim status-ing doesn't end at only women but includes all the women, Scott has pedastal-ed all the women he's teamed with.

Lizzie is, once again, the exception here due to his limited interactions with her. However that's actually somewhat patched over if you look at adjacent series (such as x-life) where he definitely shows her a level of admiration and respect.

Back to Scott and Pearl.

Their relationship during LL is very standard of how Scott treats women. While the power dynamic between them is obviously more caused by the initial life trade agreement, I don't think it's a far reach to say that Scott is somewhat comfortable in the arrangement.

However, this is also the first thing that sets their relationship apart from Scott with Cleo or Gem -- Pearl is the one making sacrifices, not Scott. She is the one "sacrificing" her lives to him, just in a more non-violent way as allowed by the season's mechanics.

When viewed through this lens, Scott trying to make it up to her and wanting his effort acknowledged makes even more sense. This is suddenly uncharted waters for him. His assuming that Pearl doesn't value him as a person goes hand in hand with him valuing himself less than her.

What Scott has with Cleo or Gem, situations where the other party is clearly uncomfortable with how he treats himself (Gem) or actively aware they are taking advantage of him (Cleo), is equalized to him because he is inherently worth less. What he has with Pearl, on the other hand, looks more equal to most people (lives vs labour) but is wildly imbalanced to him.

It's one of the many factors I see going into Scott's weird decision to abandon her in DL.

An Interlude, Before We Get to DL

La Pieta, Michelangelo

So this has been a lot of words so far and some of you might be wondering at this point: why say Scott is "weird" about women when so far this has been describing how he values women more, is kinder to them, is more patient with them, etc.? How is any of this behaviour remotely misogynistic?

And I would feel horrible if I forced you to read through all of my DL thoughts before I clarified this -- Scott is not your classic wifebeater "women are lesser" misogynist, Scott is someone who subscribes to misogynistic schools of thought and probably considers himself an ally to women, when in reality his beliefs are still rooted in dehumanizing them and these beliefs end up harming the women around him as well as himself.

After all, seeing women are your superiors is still not seeing them as your equals.

I know it's a bit of a meme on this blog at this point. But. Sigmund Freud identified what we know refer to as the "madonna/whore complex", which he described as a pattern of behaviour in men who separated women into being madonnas (pure, holy and admirable) and whores (debased, sexual, deviant). We'll be focusing on the former, the madonna, as it is more relevant to Scott's character.

Freud proposed that the madonna figure was something men projected onto women as a replacement for maternal love. These women are sacred and untouchable, literally as the projection of the maternal role onto them also makes it so that the sufferer cannot feel any sexual attraction towards her (keep this in mind for later).

Scott projects the madonna figure onto his female compatriots -- they are to be protected, served and supported. They are goddesses, queens, but they are never human. The madonna role in of itself is not inherently harmful to the woman, as seen with Cleo who takes control and advantage of it. However, it is enforced, as seen with Gem who at first revels in the superiority but almost breaks down when Scott offers him up as her sacrificial lamb one last time.

I linked this Utena AMV awhile back when vaguely talking about Scott and women, and this was the point I was alluding to.

Girls are beautiful and pure. They don't spit on the street, they don't piss on the street, they don't build hierarchies -- they subvert all the expectations of masculinity that I hate having to deal with. They are my escape.

But what about the girls who do spit on the street? The girls who piss on seats? Who build social hierarchies, who size up their competition?

The girls Scott interacts with are all painfully human. Cleo weaponizes his beliefs and take advantage of him. Scott is smart enough to know and accept this. Gem's playing into a role she has been assigned into by not only Scott but everyone around her. Scott supports the character she plays. Lizzie reflects traits he hates in Joel and Jimmy, but for her, he looks the other way.

Are they "demons", as the song says, or are they no longer girls at all?

(demons, gods, but never humans)

Weaponized Femininity and Women In Total Control of Themselves ;)

Hylas and the Nymphs, John William Waterhouse

Historically, weaponized femininity I'd argue is one of the oldest tropes in storytelling. Whether it's nymphs or sirens or witches or succubi or even more roundabout cases like Helen of Troy, there's countless stories of men's sexual attraction to women leading them to disaster.

One way to view these stories is to see them as warnings, don't let womens allure be the end of you.

There's a lot of good writing done on the femme fatale trope both in the context of weaponizing femininity and as a sexist way to argue against victims of sexual assault, as these stories often say that men who experience attraction to these "evil" women no longer have agency over their own actions.

Look at the painting above, for example - is it the nymphs who are responsible for drowning Hylas, or is Hylas climbing into the lake of his own accord?

Despite the fact we all know sirens, nymphs and succubi aren't real, the belief that men will simply lose control of themselves when encountering a particularly alluring woman persists to the modern consciousness. That there's something inherently dangerous about women and attraction to them.

(this is not 100% applicable to Ninja saying he won't stream with women, but it's the real life example I felt most comfortable putting in here)

Now, let's combine this with what's been said so far -- let's say you don't hate women. You love women, in fact, and you hate the way men treat women. You hate men, in fact.

Yet, you still believe in this inherent power women hold by being female and the loss of agency that men experience when attracted to them -- how disgusting.

It quickly becomes easily to not only demonize men for sullying the holiness of women, but also men, masculinity and attraction to women as a whole.

(apologies for using twt discourse in the meta post but this flew by my TL and i had to grab the irl example of mens non-violent attraction to women being used to frame them as misogynistic before the stupid app refreshed and i lose everything forever)

"To Venner" is a student film exploring a world set within this belief, where all the women have vanished and the men have become monstrous figures as a result of their pent up sexual frustration. fyi this is one of my favourite student films (and ive watched a bunch), but I do think its messaging is worth breaking down (especially its juxtaposition of dirty horrible monstrous sexuality vs pure and beautiful romantic love)

NOTE: this film is super graphic, lots of violence and nudity. have fun. or not

I admit this section is a bit hard to gauge as everyone in the series is gay as fuck. The closest in-series example I can think of is Scott reacting to Martyn's antics in DL with a sort of indigence but otherwise I can't really think of an example of a man expressing attraction to a woman at all, let alone one Scott reacted to. However, I do think it's still worth talking about because it opens up some interesting trains of thought in regard to Scott and Pearl.

For Scott, he himself has never been part of the picture. He's gay, after all, which gives him an edge over the bad straight men who objectify and assault women. Likewise, there's little evidence to suggest he finds the expectations of masculinity frustrating, but I don't think it's too far a reach considering how common of an experience that is for gay men and his adapting of more feminine mannerisms.

Double Life and Corruption

As mentioned in my previously linked post about Scott and Pearl's relationship, I do think Scott experiences what he would name as attraction towards Pearl, so my writing will reflect that.

Pearl is. ahem. not like other girls.

Not actually. But to Scott, she probably isn't like other girls.

She remains unaware of his different standards for her (how could she when she had nothing to compare them to), she acts out, sometimes violently, against Scott's urging (such as when she stole from Scar's wagon). She maintains their already irregular dynamic, and while she appreciates his care for her, she never quite falls into seeing him as a source of subservience the way Cleo or Gem do.

At the end of LL, right before the 1v1v1v1, she monologues to herself that she no longer has to feel bad for killing Scott. Which, in turn, implies she expected Scott to give it his all against her as well.

She entirely fails to embody the madonna with her immature naivete and her questionable morals. She is unpredictable, she doesn't take what she is owed, she is a monster in a lot of ways.

Scott, too, is a monster, to himself, for how he feels about her.

The very foundations of your understanding of yourself being ripped apart aside, let's rewind to the madonna/whore complex. To sexualise the madonna is to corrupt her and make a monster of yourself. Suddenly, you are no better than the men around you, the ones you've grown to hate. Suddenly, you are the grotesque figures in films like To Venner. You are Hylas and she is the nymph. And you are so stupid. Your worldview crumbles around its flawed foundations.

Scott is, however, immune to this corruption. This is a theme that appears in Empires as well, but throughout the traffic series he's prided himself on being loyal and kind and good. His monologue leading up to LL's 1v1v1v1 summarizes it quite well.

He can't let himself or anyone else see this side of him, but the energy needs to go somewhere. To defy fate, abandon your soulmate, is to admit you had a fate in the first place, is to acknowledge that she was your soulmate in the first place.

I've previously talked about how fate and romance are very ingrained in Scott's belief system, if it was anyone else it would've been amazing. He could've been like Bdubs and Impulse or Ren and Bigb, diving into domestic life and performative romance with a stranger. Or the world could've made his happy ending from 3L real, as he got to be Jimmy's husband all over again. I think it says something that he accepts Cleo as a "soulmate" before Pearl.

So what do you do with all that energy and tension, clearly apparent to yourself and everyone else, when you can't let them observe your feelings?

You project them.

Shout-outs to @/legally-allowed-to-slime for pointing out Pearl's comment early on in DL that she "feels like (she's) been broken up with" confirms she never saw Scott in a romantic sense. The "crazy ex-girlfriend" and "this is why I'm gay" comments really did come out of thin air, or perhaps insecurity.

Pearl is the crazy one. She's insane, because she wants me. She wants to be with me, so she does all this crazy stuff. She's lost control of herself because she wants me. She's disgusting.

I mentioned before that Scott is not your classic misogynist, but this is where the gears start turning. Scott's views of Pearl echo that of other players, most prominently Ren and Martyn, that Pearl has been overcome with some sort of corruption. She has become the witch, the demoness, the whore, in their eyes. Scott does not want to be the same as these men and I think his overcorrecting his behaviour in SL makes sense when you view it from this angle, but for now he has to rely on more traditional misogyny in order to navigate this new obstacle.

"Corruption" also implies that she had to have been pure (or at least pure-er) beforehand, something Scott personally knows is not true, but it falls in line with defaulting women to being "madonnas".

This is a Scott post but. shout outs to Ren for being all of this about Pearl but without the complexity of Scott like he literally accuses Pearl of seducing Bigb what the fuck man.

Pearl is, of course, none of that. But she plays into the role of being the witch much better than she fared playing into the role of the madonna.

Sidenote: I know I'm looking at this from a Scott/Pearl POV but I do feel like you can omit Scott's attraction if you look at it from a purely "pearl not performing to standards of femininity I expect and she makes me realise I don't view women as a whole as human which makes me feel weird so now we have to do this" POV. Like idk I think the exact reason he abandoned Pearl is going to be lost on everyone forever so any analysis I could perform is going to suffer at least a little bit of making-shit-up-itis.

I do also think there's something to be said about Pearl being pushed until she performed a role, any role and generally failing at Being A Girl tm but that's another post i think. yknow shes um. a bit. 🏳️‍⚧️ (but also very much not at the same time idk that's gonna need its own post)

anyway yeah uh the minecraft movie looks crazy huh

[neversetyoufree]

I think Luna, Queen Faustina(naenia) and the shapeless one are wayyy too similar in the way they are drawn, the lines, the eyes. Shapeless one has one red eye and another blue eye, like naenia and the vampire of the blue moon..... am i missing smt or?

You're absolutely right! A lot of this actually gets pointed out by characters in the manga as well, so we know it's all intentional on Mochijun's part.

When Noé sees Luna in Misha's memories, he remarks in confusion that Luna looks extremely similar to Faustina:

Then, when Jeanne sees The Shapeless One for the first time in the amusement park, she observes that his left eye is the exact same color as Vanitas's eyes (and therefore the same color as Luna's eyes).

Teacher's right eye is violet, not crimson like Faustina's, so he's not a perfect combination of the other two, but there's definitely something going on here. Even without the visual link, we know they're connected, as Ruthven says Teacher was the first vampire to serve her (and the one to do so for the longest). He's extremely old, the oldest vampire we know of besides the queen, so he may even have some connection to Babel and Faustina's origins. (I'm personally a fan of the Teacher is Paracelsus theory, but that should really be a separate post).

As for your confusion, I honestly think you're right to be confused! We have all these extremely conspicuous connections and similarities, but no explanations yet. It's all just hints and gestures toward Big Reveals that are yet to come.

That said, I do have theories.

Luna and Faustina are similar-looking enough that I think they have to be related in some way. They could be normal relatives, one could have been artificially made in the image of the other, or it could be something even weirder that I haven't thought of yet, but there's no way their origins aren't connected somehow.

I know some people theorize they're twins, but that would require discounting all of the fairytale version of Luna's story, so I'm not ready to commit to that one quite yet. Faustina is supposed to be the first ever crimson vampire, created during or right after Babel, while Luna was supposedly born under a blue moon and born late enough that there were other vampires around to resent and reject them. Some of that mythos could be wrong! I'm absolutely not trusting that the fairy tale is telling the truth about Luna (or Faustina). But it's enough for now to make me suspect that their connection is something more complex than their simply being twins and/or both born from Babel.

Meanwhile, with Teacher, it seems like Mochijun is hinting to us that Teacher took Luna's left eye. Teacher has a left eye that we're specifically told is Blue Moon blue, and Luna's left eye is constantly hidden from our view under their hair. We also know from the above "most beautiful creature in the world" line, his involvement with both Misha and Noé/Vanitas, and his shapeshifting into them that Teacher seems to have some kind of fixation on Luna. If that fixation didn't drive him to take their actual left eye, then Mr. Shapeshifter may well be turning his own left eye blue on purpose in Luna's image.

I'm not discounting the possibility that the obvious explanation of "eye theft" could be a red herring, but Teacher's left eye's connection to Luna definitely strikes me as something affected rather than a sign of actual relation to the Blue Moon. After all, in that panel I included above, he discusses the beauty of "Blue" in a way that makes it sound like something external he's fascinated with, rather than something he possesses or is part of.

Overall, all three of these characters are obviously interconnected, and they all have equally mysterious origins, but with the information we have now, it's impossible to solve those mysteries. For now all we can do is theorize and wait to see what future chapters might clarify.

[that-ari-blogger]

Iconic (Defying Gravity)

If you look up "iconic Broadway songs", you get lists upon lists of musical numbers, but there are a few constants. Beside One Day More from Les Misérables, Don't Cry For Me Argentina from Evita, and Seasons Of Love from Rent, you will usually find Defying Gravity, from Wicked.

If you think about it, this is actually rather weird, right? The aforementioned songs are about preparing for death, dying, and looking back on life, respectively. Defying Gravity is about a witch deciding to fly. A story that is objectively fantastical (it depicts magic and flying monkeys in a place that definitely does not exist) stands next to stories of real-world history and events, and nobody bats an eyelid because... well... because it's just that good.

This is like a corgi winning a race fair and square against a ton of cheetahs.

I think it's worth examining just what Defying Gravity does to stand beside giants, and what story it is telling.

Let me explain.

SPOILERS AHEAD: (Wicked)

Defying Gravity is a battle cry.

When you examine a piece of media, the first thing you need to understand is what it is that that piece of media is trying to achieve. For example, if you examine a commercial for toothpaste through the same lens as a commercial film, that commercial will fall short. Similarly, if you examine a song that is trying to get stuck in your head through a classical, technical lens, things get funky.

You can, of course, apply those different lenses if you want. That's the fun thing about art, there are few rules. But even then, you need to understand the purpose of the text.

Defying Gravity is a battle cry.

It is a song that calls to arms its listeners. It says to Oz that things will get better, if Elphaba has to tear down the world to make it so. And it tells the audience to get excited, because someone has just started shaking things up.

The song is a turning point in the musical. It is the end of act one, and it sets the trajectory of the second half of the story. It defines how the characters will behave going forwards. But also...

Defying Gravity is a breakup song.

I don't think the two are disconnected at all. Wicked is about reality and dreams colliding, and it follows the seeking of freedom. The twist is that for freedom, you have to give up your safety, and Glinda isn't prepared to do that, but Elphaba is.

This is a piece by @abd-illustrates (Youtube, Deviantart). Although I believe it's technically about No Good Deed, I feel it's relevant here and a spectacular feat of artistic merit that I had to put it in.

Wicked has been accused of queer bating by fans, and while I see that angle, I don't quite agree. I think that the romantic relationship between Glinda and Elphaba does happen, but the fact that it doesn't work is key to the story. They are doomed lovers, and this song is that breaking point.

What is more valuable to our protagonists? Autonomy or stability? Both characters pick different options, and that incompatibility tears them apart.

"Elphaba, why couldn't you have stayed calm for once? Instead of flying off the handle!

I hope you're happy

I hope you're happy now

I hope you're happy how

you've hurt your cause forever

I hope you think you're clever"

Glinda's perspective here is clear, she believes in the system she is a part of. She sees its flaws, but because they work for her, she sees them as strengths. And this is understandable, the system has only benefited her, so she is blind to its faults.

But understandable is not the same as agreeable, and I am inclined to follow Elphaba's logic here. The system is unjust, and directly in opposition to her goal of fairness and equality. She wants to make the world a better place, and now that the system's lies are revealed to her, she needs to take things in a different direction.

"I hope you're proud how you would grovel in submission

To feed your own ambition"

So, the sides are established, and this song serves as a battle of ideas. Both characters want their friend to join them, and its notable how they go about doing that.

Glinda falls on aspiration and references a previous song to get her point across.

"You can still be with the wizard

What you've worked and waited for

You can have all you ever wanted"

I feel the need to point out that Glinda wasn't present when Elphaba sang The Wizard and I, and yet she matches the tune and meaning almost perfectly. Elphaba hasn't merely told Glinda her dream, she has shared her dream with her, and confided in her that incredibly vulnerable side of herself.

Elphaba acted so differently in The Wizard and I than in the rest of the story, she was less guarded, and more childish with that naive hope that she holds onto throughout the entirety of the show. That hope just becomes less naive and more relentless.

Elphaba has shared that naivety and hope and whimsicality with Glinda, and it's that relationship that Glinda is calling on now. Remember us, remember our dream.

However, for all Glinda's canniness and understanding of the world, she doesn't understand people, and she doesn't understand Elphaba.

Elphaba wanted to meet the wizard for a reason. She had a motive behind her dream that superseded the specifics of how it would play out.

"But I don't want it

No, I can't want it anymore"

Notice the vernacular that Elphaba uses. She can't want to be with the wizard. In her mind, doing the right thing isn't a choice. To Elphaba, good is a force that has pushed her to where she is right now, and forced her to sing this song.

Essentially, Elphaba is a paragon hero and is actively unmaking the grey morality of the setting. Often in media, "realism" is shorthand for everyone being either selfish or misunderstood. It's a pessimistic worldview of life that I don't entirely agree with.

That does happen in real life, don't get me wrong. The vast majority of the world is made up of people who are capable of actions that are good, bad, or neither.

But there are people out there who are truly cruel and evil, trust me, I've met some of them. But I've also met their opposite, people who are kind and compassionate and do what they think is right because to them, there isn't another option.

Elphaba is that second type of person, and the musical has got its audience to take this for granted at this point. But it's worth remembering that this character is the Wicked Witch of the West, the cartoon bad guy of an iconic work of literature. The musical hasn't made her more morally nuanced; it has made the world more nuanced, and that has reframed this character entirely.

The song even reminds the audience of this fact through the ensemble, just to make the juxtaposition more obvious.

"Look at her! She's wicked, get her.

No one mourns the wicked! So we've got to bring her

Down"

This is actually foreshadowing for a later song.

Back to this part, the backing of the song has spent the majority of its run time playing elaborate movements, but for Galinda and Elphaba's talk about dreams, it simplifies. Galinda gets a bare trickle of that floaty harmony, but Elphaba gets next to nothing for her line. Mostly.

This, combined with the slowing down effect brought on by the fermata (the symbol that looks like an eye), gives the conversation an intimate tone. The two have just each other to hear, and nothing to get in the way. It also frames Elphaba's line as reassurance. There is a storm coming and she is telling her girlfriend that things are going to work out ok in the end.

However, the big chords come back in on the "anymore" and lead into the key change that covers the rest of the song. This is a metaphor for the change that is happening in Elphaba's mind. As she makes her decision on how to proceed, and recognises that things are now different, the slow build up to this song's finale is finally got underway.

The rest of this song is just a build up to a final crash of sound. It rises in a few beats with the choruses, as Elphaba tests her wings, so to speak. And the song gains momentum slowly as more instruments are added.

If you thought I wasn't going to at least reference Glee's multiple performances of this song and how in that series, Defying Gravity is explicitly synonymous with queerness and pride, welcome to the blog. I make analysis posts, maybe stick around if you like this kind of thing.

"Too late for second guessing,

too late to go back to sleep"

There are two separate ideas being intertwined here. First up is the reiteration of Elphaba's inability to stop. Once again, she is doing the right thing because someone has to do it, and soon it will be too late. But the duality of this phase links that idea with the revelation about Oz. She can't go back to sleep, she can't go back to ignorance. Now that she knows what she knows, she has to act.

"Too long I've been afraid of

Losing love I guess I've lost.

Well, if that's love, it comes at much too high a cost."

This isn't particularly complex storytelling, but it's effective none the less. Elphaba is saying her realisations out loud to keep the audience up to speed. In this instance, she has been chasing acceptance, and now understands that she was never going to get it from Oz, and that what she would have to do to obtain a facade of understanding is not worth it.

The fact that my analysis of that phrase is just saying it again but slightly differently is a pretty good example of how effective the storytelling in the line is.

"I'd sooner buy defying gravity

Kiss me goodbye, I'm defying gravity

And you can't pull me down"

The first chorus of this song is remarkably understated. It doesn't have the confidence of latter verses, and I will discuss why I think that is in a moment. The orchestra pulls back to a few instruments, and the drum plays a light rhythm on one of its... ok I my musical knowledge is a bit limited here. The bit of the drum that goes "tss tss tss", you know the one.

This gives it a light feeling that adds to the unsteady feeling of the chorus as Elphaba tests the waters and learns to fly. But she needs guidance, and support, and who does she turn to for that?

"Glinda, come with me."

This is the first time Elphaba has been thinking on the spot. Usually, she thinks everything through before she says it, but now she is running entirely on a single train of thought. I cannot stress enough how this thought process is literally: "love, kiss goodbye, Glinda". Historians will say they were close friends.

A leitmotif is a recurring musical phrase that represents a certain theme. For example, earlier in the musical, Galinda's "you deserve each other" musical phrase was repeated to show false relationships and false promises, and was also used in The Wizard and I to foreshadow the false promise of the Wizard and his gifts.

The Unlimited Leitmotif is used exclusively to symbolise Elphaba and Glinda's relationship. You can read that as platonic if you want, but there are some context clues that I would argue suggest otherwise. For example, it's called the "Unlimited" leitmotif for a reason.

As I have kept harping on about, the most valuable thing a person can achieve in this musical is freedom. This is a song about defying the laws of physics themselves. And the thing that Elphaba is offering Glinda here, the thing that is so defining for their relationship that it is literally the shorthand for it, is complete and total freedom.

Together, the two are unlimited.

The second chorus is sung together. Glinda gives Elphaba the strength of spirit to continue and is quite literally the reason she can fly in the first place.

But Glinda doesn't want that. She wants to feel in control of herself more than autonomy, and that's why the relationship falls apart. The two are doomed lovers, and it's not because one of them lies or cheats or any of that soap opera nonsense, but because they want different things out of life.

"Well, are you coming?"

"I hope you're happy

Now that you're choosing this"

"You, too

I hope it brings you bliss"

All in all, I think this breakup goes remarkably well. The two realise that their lives are taking each of them in a direction that the other cannot follow, and so they offer their goodbyes peacefully and get ready for the finale of this act.

Glinda even gives Elphaba a cloak to protect her from the elements as a final goodbye gift. Which, if you are keeping track, means that both the hat and the cloak, the Wicked Witch's most iconic visual elements besides her skin, were gifts from a very close friend.

I don't need to explain why the final chorus of this song is so good, do I? The music is phenomenal, the vocal performance is unrivaled, and it outright says half of the points I have been trying to make in this post.

I do think that the sheer skill on display here is important for the theming as well. Yes, the high note symbolises the flight and escape, yes it's synonymous with rising above petty grievances, and yes the rising is literally a reverse Deus Ex Machina. But it's also just the actress who plays Elphaba showing off and having a blast. There are no limits on her vocal performance, she doesn't have to rein in anything, and she can instead belt out a number as loud and powerfully as she wants because nobody is stopping her.

"As someone told me lately,

Everyone deserves a chance to fly"

This is a reference to something that the Wizard said to Elphaba, but when he said it, he was completely talking out of his arse. The Wizard, and a significant portion of Oz as a whole, parade around saying nebulously benevolent things, but they don't actually mean it. The Wizard has created a nation based around surveillance and oppression, there is no way that he believes in everyone getting a fair go.

The important thing to understand is that the Wizard's worldview is wrong. Everyone does deserve fairness. So his lie to appease Elphaba was in fact true. Elphaba's role in this is making that lie into a reality, by giving the people someone who will say things honestly and try to actually make the world a better place.

Finally, however, as the lights prepare to shut off and Elphaba rises into the distance. Glinda stands beneath her, looking up. She is now just another face in the crowd, but her sentiment stands in stark contrast to the rest of Oz.

Simultaneously, Glinda says goodbye, and wishes Elphaba good luck on the road ahead.

"I hope you're happy."

Final Thoughts

It needs to be understood that part of why Defying Gravity stands beside historical giants like Don't Cry For Me Argentina is the fact that it is fantastical.

Wicked is a musical about the relentlessness of hope. It is set in a world where anything is possible, and it brings that to life. Through the application of some truly impressive stagecraft, the actress who plays Elphaba genuinely flies for all to see.

This is a story that takes the impossible and makes it possible, and this is the song which cemented that theme in the minds of anyone who watched it. This song fully deserves its place as my second favourite in this musical.

That's right, my favourite is yet to come, and I'm enjoying watching y'all guess at what it is in the replies.

Next week, I will be looking at Thank Goodness and how it sets up the plot of the second act. So, stick around if that interests you.

Previous - Next

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

Hobie x Isekai!Reader

[Reading Between the Lines]

WEEOO WEEOO Platonic Fic Idea WEEOO WEEOO

Hobie x Reader Isekai fic where the reader (me) is a Spider-man meta-analysis writer and they fall into the ATSV universe.

They meet Hobie and are completely starstruck, unable to speak. Flabbergasted. Uhh okay imma just do the intro "Hi, My name's Hobie, Hobie Brown. I was bitten by a-"

"...WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO KNOW YOU GET WHAT I MEAN!! And for the last three years I've been the one and only- *proceeds to do his whole intro for him*."

"What the fuck. Those are my lines. Bruv cut that shit out wth."

Everyone thinks they're weird as fuck, but Gwenpoole (and other Nexus beings) are taught about at The Society at least, so it's not a mystery why they are the way they are.

But they're just SO META

They're basically bouncing and they tell Hobie 'OMG, your like my favorite superhero. I write about you ALL THE TIME- Ignore the OC folder'

Hobies like 'I'm not a hero-'

'I knew you'd say that!!!!! AHHHHH!!!!!'

All of a sudden there's this huge Hobie groupie fan in the group that knows everything about them and their trauma 😭😭

The reader sees Gwen and is like '.......I know this isn't my place but I've read through the scene between you and your dad and I have some comments I'd like to make. I can leave out the ones where I wish him death.'

There's even a scene like this one between Miles and Gwen

Where Hobie is like 'oi this your analysis book lemme see-' only to open to dozens of pages of x-reader fics and Hobie x OC drawings

And reader is like

'Uh.... I ain't write that. I don't know how that got in there. That's not even my handwriting. I found that notebook actually 😭😭'

Meanwhile Hobies like 'Christ - how much time do you have on your hands 🤨🤔'

'....Is it that bad?'

'Oh I ain't say it was bad. Could use a some work though. Actually- *takes out Noir's reading glasses (which he stole) from his pocket because he's not gonna stand here and judge a book by its cover*'

Of course Hobie still reads the x-reader cause he's a cocky bastard.

And then he returns said fics covered in red pen and notes of 'I wouldn't do that-' or 'actually you should add this. This would be better.' or even 'Lemme do it. That other shite you wrote don't make no sense'

BASICALLY HELPING CONSTRUCT FICS ABOUT HIMSELF. Simply because he finds the concept hilarious.

He gets to the smut and he's like "How easy do you lot think I am? Think you can have a pass at me, you must be taking the fucking piss-" just ranting and raving as he STILL READS IT

Sitting there with a cup of tea reading smut of himself and covering it in red pen like it's the mornings crossword 😭😭

The crew eventually realize that the readers power of trope analysis crosses over and it's SO USEFUL

All they need to do is get reader in front of Miguel and reader gives him a heartfelt reading and connection of his trauma that equals the culmination of ten years of therapy

They're like 'i know this is all an act Miguel. I know this is all an act to cover up the crushing feeling of chaos and helplessness that comes from canon. And really, all of this is just a mirror - you wanting to control how things 'should be' because there were so many things you went through that you think shouldn't have. But those moments are apart of you-'

Miguel's likes 'WAIT WOAH STOP TALKING'

They start bringing up Gabriel and Xina and shit from the comics.

Everyone's like 'Who the hell is Gabriel-" meanwhile Miguel is on the floor sobbing going 'mi hermano. mi hermano pequeno 😭😭😭'

And it ends with them all hugging Miguel after this person just read him for filth using the power of Isekai Canon Knowledge

I'm having TOO MUCH FUN WITH THIS

In the end Reader and Hobie become best friends because they both stand out so much in other universes and both take nothing entirely serious.

Plus they're both really perceptive and nosey and good at reading people so sometimes they see some subtle shit go down and they look at each other like

"We minding our business~ 😩🎶🗣️ we ain't gon say shit~ We gon mind our goddamn business 🎤🎸🔈'

Ok ok I'm done I'm done 😭😭😭

[your-name-is-jim]

What a Kirk/Spock shipper sees in a Kirk/Female-Love-Interest story [PART 2/2]

Part 1 <- Please read Part 1 first. Part 2 won't make sense otherwise!

This panel is absolutely AMAZING and you all deserved to see it :D

So, what were we talking about? Oh, yeah, Laura just proposed.

As you can see, Jim is panicking not sure what to answer, so the first thing he does is calling his two best friends. There are so many things going on here; I'll try to mention everything I care about!

"Starfleet is getting a lot better at partners of equal rank working together."

This is an important part of this comic: apparently, in this story Starfleet isn't encouraging relationships between officers with a different rank. I know it's sort of implied in canon too, but it's not always clear if it's actually against regulations or if it's fine when the ranks are close.

As a K/S shipper, this detail just gives me an in-universe reason why Jim and Spock aren't considering dating each other in this story: a commander can't probably have a relationship with a captain. I mean, we already know from canon TOS that Jim avoids relationships with the members of his crew, so this just adds a layer to a potential forbidden love story between them. Yeah, I know this isn't what this comic is trying to do, but what can I say? Fans don't stop shipping something just because they learn it's not allowed in-universe… if anything, they can find it more exciting! :D

"We could teach at the Academy. Mind you, she laughed at that idea."

Oh, wait. Jim actually talked to Laura about their possible future together! It looks like he's thinking about them as teachers at Starfleet Academy. Hmm… this sounds familiar:

2277 — Accepts appointment to Academy faculty, moves into San Francisco apartment

This is from Kirk's biography in Star Trek official website. Between The Motion Picture and The Wrath of Khan, Jim accepts a job at the Academy. We see it at the start of the second movie, after Saavik takes the Kobayashi Maru test.

Wait, who's the other teacher here? :D

Okay, okay, in that era Jim is an admiral and Spock is a captain, so their ranks are still different, but except for that… They both teach at the Academy. And it's literally what Jim proposed to his love interest Laura in the comic! With my Kirk/Spock goggles on, what I read in that panel is "If Laura and I got married, we could both do this thing that I'm totally going to do with Spock in the future." LOL

Did the comic creators notice the parallel? Probably not. However, we K/S shippers have special skills for finding accidental implications about our ship everywhere, so here it is :)

"Your thoughts, please, Mr. Spock."

I said I had a lot to say about that single panel, so of course I can't skip the last line! A human woman has just proposed to Jim, and what does Jim do? He asks for Spock's opinion. This says a lot about Jim and Spock's friendship, and it's very sweet on Jim's part, but it also makes me think about Jim's love life. What about Jim and Laura's romantic feelings for each other? Does Jim want to spend the rest of his life with her? Perhaps the reason they don't talk about it (not even with Bones!) is that it's implied that Jim loves her and she loves him, even if they never say it. However, I still think it's interesting that Jim's discussion on the matter is mostly "logical".

Anyway, I swear I won't post every single panel of this comic, but Spock's reply is an absolute gem you all must see:

"I AM SOMETHING OF AN EXPERT ON THE SUBJECT OF JAMES T. KIRK."

(dkjflsdjlkdjglk brb losing my mind again)

Ahem. Okay, Spock. Noted. Also, wow, nice make up. Did I say that the art in this comic is great? Good.

"I believe someone of equal status would offer you the best possible chance of happiness."

Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but I find interesting his use of "equal status" instead of the more specific "equal rank". Status makes me think less of their official position in Starfleet, and more of how two people actually see each other. It's not just about Laura and Jim being both captains; it's about them seeing each other as equals.

Anyway, Jim jokes about Bones and Spock finally agreeing about something, and the conversation continues.

Jim's best friends are both encouraging him to marry Laura. In this panel, I zoomed in on Bones because his words are especially interesting. Based on everything we've seen so far, it looks like having a romantic partner when you're in Starfleet is a pain in the ass in general in this comic; however, Bones is pointing out that for the first time, Jim has someone who really understands. Of course, that's because she's a Starfleet captain too.

About Spock, I won't share the entire conversation, but I just want to say that as a K/S shipper who likes to think Spock is secretly in love with Jim in this era, I find his dialogue where he's supporting Jim's relationship with Laura totally reasonable. It's important to remember that this comic takes place close to the end of the five-year mission. We know that Spock is going to run away after that, trying to erase all his emotions in Gol. So, in this specific part of his story, I find pretty in character that he'd tell Jim to find happiness with someone else. That's what he'd do, regardless of his own feelings.

So, Jim knows his two best friends think he should say "yes" to Laura. What happens next?

During a mission, Jim meets his ex Carol Marcus. She is surprised to find out that Jim is considering settling down. This is not completely related to this analysis, so I won't post it, but I found interesting that Carol knows about every single woman Jim dated before he became captain (the only one she doesn't name is Ruth), and she even says "And that woman in 1930, what was her name?" Just… how the hell does she know? LMAO

At least Jim hasn't told her about Miramanee and Rayna (well, technically he doesn't even remember the latter), but seriously, Carol does know a lot about Jim's private life, even if it's clear she doesn't want her or their son to be part of it. (Not really related to this plot, but in case you're confused about the timeline: David is a child in this era; however, he doesn't appear in this story.)

Anyway, this is what she eventually tells him:

So, I like to think that Carol is genuinely trying to help Jim here, because the spiteful ex girlfriend is another thing I don't really want to see in 2020. I want to think that the creators meant well; however, what happens in the story is that, despite Jim not seeing himself outside the captain's chair, and despite his best friends telling him to marry the captain that is just like him… Jim keeps thinking about Carol's words.

He knows from Starfleet that he's going to be promoted to admiral the moment he reaches Earth. What is interesting here is that Jim could refuse the promotion and be a captain with Laura. This is definitely a different situation from everything else I've seen before. It's obvious to anyone who has watched TOS movies that Jim is not happy as an admiral. He didn't really want to be one. He doesn't want to be one in this comic series either (you can see it explored in Star Trek: Year Five main story). However, thanks to The Motion Picture, we also know that he will accept promotion at the end of his five-year mission. This isn't a canon divergence story: the writers can't really change any major event, so they have to work with what canon offers.

What I find interesting is that in this 2020 comic, Jim finds himself in the opposite situation he is in Gene Roddenberry's The Motion Picture novelization from 1979. In Roddenberry's novel, it's mentioned briefly that Jim starts a relationship on Earth with a vice-admiral, a woman that was basically asked to use her charm to keep Jim grounded. Jim could refuse promotion, but he finds himself lost, without his ship, without Spock, and eventually without Bones. So he tries to convince himself that a life as an admiral with a perfect woman by his side will be good for him (it will not; Jim himself will realize a year later that his lover was an "Enterprise-surrogate").

Now, I understand trying to write something fresher and more modern in this Valentine's Day special, but I confess that I find a little hard to believe that Jim would accept a promotion as admiral if the alternative was keeping both a starship AND a wife. Also, let's not forget that Spock and Bones are both telling him to choose the married captain life. So, while I totally get from a writer's point of view that if you can't change canon, you have to work with what you have, I'm also not sure that Carol reminding Jim that he's always wanted to challenge himself is enough to make him doubt everything.

I guess I can sort of see that as part of a bigger problem: Jim knows he can't be a captain for life; during his first date with Laura, as we saw in Part 1 of my analysis, he talks about it.

"I've been thinking lately about whether I could ever stop being a Starfleet captain. Whether I could ever want to. A friend of mine talks about 'infinite diversity'. That applies to the Federation, too. But here I am, only built for one thing."

So, Jim knows he has probably avoided the subject for too long. Carol is forcing him to think about it. And, more implicitly, we could say Spock and his IDIC philosophy are also making him think, even if it's not what Spock would have expected. After all, Spock told Jim to marry Laura (in the comic), and he'll tell him that being a starship captain is his "first, best destiny" (in The Wrath of Khan).

Anyway, Jim eventually decides to meet Laura and talk to her about his personal concerns. First of all, we find out that the two of them haven't called each other for six weeks. Laura is still waiting for Jim's answer, and she didn't want to call him. If you ask me, their lack of communication is yet another a big clue that perhaps getting married is not a great idea.

Well, now Jim is at least trying to talk to her.

Aaand that's how she breaks up with him.

I'm not sure how to feel about this. I mean, in a sense, Jim doesn't say "I decided to be an admiral instead of marrying you", but Laura definitely sees it that way. I think he was genuinely looking for help, but that just proves that Laura isn't the right person for him. Why marrying someone you can't communicate with? They are such a great team as captains, but it looks like that doesn't apply to their relationship. I pointed out other clues in the previous parts, and now we got this. It's interesting to see that Jim in this comic can have a normal conversation about his future with Spock, Bones, and even Carol Marcus, but not with the person he's supposed to build a future with. Unless something changes between them, it can't work out.

Anyway, this isn't the end.

A year later, when Jim is an admiral on Earth, there's a sudden emergency. A miniature black hole appears out of the deep structure of the universe (don't blame me for the science, I'm literally quoting the comic LOL) and it's attracted to Earth gravity. Short story: they're all going to die, but fortunately the Drake (Laura's ship) can cause an anti-matter implosion that will shunt the black hole outside their reality. Unfortunately, that also means the Drake will have to go inside the black hole. Laura evacuates her crew and asks Admiral Kirk to give her the order to proceed. Reluctantly, Jim tells her that he knows she'll do it, and he gives the order.

Now, please appreciate The Motion Picture aesthetic:

Okay, I know I could have chosen a panel with Jim and Laura, since this is literally their love story, but I did say this analysis was going to be biased, so here is Laura with her two closest friends instead; they would never let her risk her life alone! <3 They are very obviously meant to be a parallel to what Spock and Bones are to Jim, which is very cute to see. Now, Laura, listen to me: I know the three of you have different ranks, but you may die in a few seconds… And I just think that the few times your friends appear in this comic, you have a lot of chemistry with them, sooo maybe you should forget about Jim and just smooch one of them, or both… just saying :)

Ahem. Anyway, after Laura and her girlfriends disappear into the void, there's another timeskip. This time it's 15 years.

Oh, damn.

I said in the premise of this analysis that one of the reasons I decided to read this comic despite shipping Kirk/Spock is that, in my headcanon, Kirk and Spock get together after The Motion Picture. Until this point, this comic hasn't really gone against my headcanon. I can genuinely believe that Jim had another girlfriend during his five-year mission; it's not a big deal. Unfortunately for me, this comic has its last part taking place around The Final Frontier era. Dammit.

Well, it's just one comic. I read until this point; it'd be illogical not to read until the end, right? Nah, it's not logic. It's human curiosity. I know I won't like it, but I still want to see it.

Also, if there's something that I really don't want to see in modern media anymore, is female characters dying just to make male characters suffer. I can accept that in TOS show because it was made in the 1960s, but even TOS movies got better about it! Characters like Saavik and Gillian can have their own lives without having to die for a man's pain. It's not a coincidence that the writers had to kill Spock to make Jim suffer. Without digressing too much, I just wanted to say that K/S bias aside, I went into this comic hoping to read something different from another dead woman for Jim. I'm very glad that, at least about this, the comic creators didn't disappoint me!

So, in this story, it's been 15 years since Laura's disappearance (actually, it should be more, but I'll try not to nitpick, despite being the trekkies' favorite hobby :D). Anyway, the one with the whales The Voyage Home happened, and Jim is not an admiral anymore. He's happy to have a starship again, but he hasn't stopped questioning his life decisions.

We can also see that, 15 years later, he's reading the book Laura liked.

HOLD IT! WAIT WAIT WAIT! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??? WHAT THE--

*inhales deeply*

(Friendly reminder to myself that what is obvious to me may not be obvious to everyone else, so I need to explain. Fine. I'll try.)

The screenshots I posted are from The Wrath of Khan, right after Spock's funeral. What Jim is doing there is reading the end of the book that Spock gave him for his birthday. He's mourning Spock.

In the comic panel, Jim has a new pair of glasses, because it takes place a little later in the timeline. But, except for that…

It's the same scene.

The same fucking scene.

I mean, come on! I can't even post the "they're the same picture" meme, because it's not funny if they're literally the same picture! Even the bookmark is the same!

The comic creators literally took a canon scene about Jim reading Spock's book after Spock is gone, and they redrew it with Jim reading Laura's book after Laura is gone. In a Valentine's Day special. Where Laura is Jim's love interest. They made a romantic scene with Jim and a woman that was originally about Jim and Spock.

(Brb, I'm going to chew a pillow until I calm down.)

So. Well. If you wondered why I thought there was something about Kirk/Spock in this comic… you have your answer. Perhaps the artist didn't think anything about it. I certainly do.

And I guess someone could say, "But Jim is still reading Laura's book 15 years later! That's true love!" Why yes, he's not reading Spock's book 15 years later, because he didn't stay without Spock for 15 years; he risked everything and lost all the most important things in his life to save Spock's soul.

Anyway, back to the comic. Starfleet receives a signal from the edge of Federation space. It's the Drake. Laura and her friends are alive.

Jim and Laura have a reunion after a long separation. Since they're both captains now, Jim thinks they are given a second chance.

Oh, whoops.

It's her turn now. It looks like being away for 15 years has changed her (as you can expect, honestly), and she's now glad to become an admiral. In this comic, that means Jim can't marry her. So, this is how the story ends:

So. Um.

This isn't a bad ending, but I also wouldn't exactly call it a happy ending. It's certainly not a happily ever after story. I'd call it open, maybe hopeful? Honestly, pretty much what I'd expect from a love story between an original character and Jim, so I can't say the writing is disappointing about that.

On the other hand, I can't personally imagine middle-aged Jim being so eager to start a romance again with someone he hasn't seen in 15 years who broke up with him 16 years ago. Perhaps he felt guilty about Laura's disappearance because if he had married her, they would have been part of a colonization fleet somewhere else and the incident wouldn't have happened the same way? Maybe. Personally, I would have found more believable an ending where Jim asks her to have dinner together or go for a walk, and then something romantic happening as they get to know each other again. But I can see why the creators wanted to bring up the marriage proposal again, just to close the circle. The comic is just 32 pages, so they did what they could.

"Unless there's someone else." "Not so much. I've been really busy."

Busy with what? Oh, right: Spock's death, Spock's body on Genesis, Spock's rebirth on Vulcan, the time travel (okay, that one wasn't 100% Spock-related), Spock's brother… Honestly, just say there's been a lot of Spock in your life, Jim, because that's the truth :)

On a more serious note, I guess that dialogue could mean that Jim has someone, but "he's been too busy" to do anything serious with them. However, as a K/S monoshipper I don't really like the idea of Jim being in an open relationship with Spock, so Jim's character in the entire scene in the end is just a big NOPE for me. Sorry.

That said, I found very interesting that in a few panels they show very clearly the "captain" rank on Jim and Laura's shoulders, to point out that it's the same. They can't be together forever, but they can have fun for a few days as captains. Because of that, I went back to the start of the last timeskip, just to check out something:

Fascinating.

This is a pretty detailed panel, where you can see the ranks on the shoulders of Jim's friends; the colors of their pins are also pretty good, close to the ones in the movies… except for Spock's.

Oh, please. Did you really expect me not to pay attention to this? :)

Captain Kirk and Captain Spock.

And unlike Laura, this is what they are until the end! The end of a very long life! Generations? What's Generations? Spock will eventually become an ambassador, but that's just a different job. How did Spock himself put it earlier in this comic?

"I am something of an expert on the subject of James T. Kirk. And I believe someone of equal status would offer you the best possible chance of happiness."

Did the comic creators just play themselves? I don't know, I'm quoting their own story here! LOL

And what about Jim's words from the same scene? :D

"Starfleet is getting a lot better at partners of equal rank working together."

Partners. Of equal rank. Working together.

That's literally what Kirk and Spock are since the end of The Voyage Home! Without an expiration date!

The comic creators made a big deal in their universe about relationships being better between two captains, and how good Jim and Laura may have been for each other if they had married as captains; and now they can't have their happily ever after because Laura is going to be an admiral… But even if the comic tries to hide it, we know there is a captain in Jim's life. And to make things better, Jim lost his admiral rank to bring him back. Listen, I'm a huge Old Married Kirk/Spock fan, so there's no way anything can make me forget that in the last TOS movies they're both captains. And there's no way I can forget that Jim risked his entire career (and everything else!) for Spock, and that's literally why he's not an admiral anymore.

This is almost ironic in this Valentine's Day comic. If it hadn't been for Spock, Jim would have still been an admiral, and he could have married Laura. Whoops. Too bad.

Speaking of admirals, I didn't notice it at first, but there's also something about this line Laura says in the last panel I posted…

"And don't you dare 'Admiral' me."

Ah, yes, a typical thing you tell someone you're planning to have sex with. Right, Laura? Agreed :)

Honestly, at this point I should just stop checking this comic, because I wonder if I'd just end up finding a Kirk/Spock version of every Kirk/Laura Rhone line LOL

By the way, I have other thoughts to share now that the story is over, but there's one more thing first. Do you remember the last panels of the comic? Middle-aged Jim and Laura kiss; END.

Okay. After that, the comic has a picture of the cover, with Jim and Laura kissing when they're younger.

And then it has this:

dklsfjlskjflskjlksjlkdlkgjdlfgsnfjekniuwanf LISTEN, HOW--

Just how am I even supposed to say anything that makes sense about this…??? I'm just… I can't…

Okay. So. We're talking about a Valentine's Day comic. It makes sense for it to include a cute Valentine card. I also get that Spock's iconic line has become so mainstream that it can be quoted out of context. And you can make parodies.

But… But… A Star Trek TOS fan can't really forget the original context of "I have been and always shall be your friend"? Someone could just not think about it, I guess… But, well, I know that at least I can't forget that this is literally Spock's line to Jim rewritten in a romantic Valentine's Day version. I can't possibly NOT think about it!

And I know it's very possible that the people who worked on the comic story weren't even aware of this extra, but the fact that I'm seeing this after reading about Jim Kirk's romance without happily ever after… Jim kisses a woman he can't stay with forever, and then there's Spock's "I have been and always shall be your Valentine". It's just so fucking funny. I can't. If I was feeling a little down after seeing middle-aged Jim wanting to marry Laura, now I'm laughing again. Thanks, Spock's silly Valentine card. I needed it! :D

Anyway, what did I say about this comic taking things originally created for Kirk and Spock's relationship and making them romantic when they're not about them? I can believe that sometimes it's a coincidence, but this card? Please… In a sense, this is the perfect ending.

---

Conclusions.

I started this comic with a question: in 2020, how do you write a story about TOS Kirk falling in love? I wanted to see this attempt. Overall, I think the creators did what they could. Laura is different from every other woman in Jim's life; they didn't kill her off, and they also didn't force a happy ending. I think they did a good job with the canon limitations they had, especially in 32 pages.

Do I believe that Laura could have been a good match for Jim in different circumstances?

As a temporary girlfriend? Yes.

As a lifelong partner? No.

Of course, I'm aware my answer is biased, but I can try to be a little more "logical" about it.

First of all, I think that the comic itself supports my interpretation: of course, like in every story, different people are going to see different things; however, as I already pointed out, Jim and Laura never say that they love each other, and before the marriage proposal their relationship is pretty casual.

In The Original Series, Jim isn't lucky when it comes to romance because the women he falls in love with can't really understand his nature as a space explorer. Sometimes they can, like in Carol's case, and that's why they break up with him. Laura is the opposite, because she's just like Jim. But here is the thing: I think Laura is too much like him.

What would have happened if Jim had accepted to marry her at the end of the five-year mission? They would have been both captains. On different ships, though. Sure, they could have been part of the same colonization fleet, as Jim says in the comic, and maybe it would have worked for a while. However, would they really have seen each other as much as Jim needs?

I don't know about Laura, but we see multiple times in canon that behind his mask as a starship captain, Jim is definitely more lonely than what someone may think.

First of all, don't get me wrong: in these screenshots from The Naked Time, Jim is single, so of course his attraction to Janice Rand is related to that. It's not the same situation he'd be in if he were married to Laura. Early in the series, he has thoughts about his yeoman exactly because he doesn't have anyone else. Contrary to his fame as a womanizer, TOS Jim in canon always has one woman at a time in his mind, never more.

So, why am I sharing those lines? To show that when Jim is always inside the Enterprise, he does feel lonely. He needs a romantic partner's physical touch. However, we also know that Jim does not want a relationship with one of his subordinates, so Janice Rand and the rest of his crew are off limits.

Laura is good for him because she's part of Starfleet, and not a subordinate. But is that really enough? From what I've seen in the comic, no. At the end of the day, it looks to me that Jim and Laura don't really know how to plan a future together. Perhaps it's because they're so similar, but they don't really think of themselves as a couple, especially Laura. There's Captain James T. Kirk and Captain Laura Rhone; they both love their ships, so they should get married? That's not how it works.

Their relationship is casual. Jim doesn't want to define it. Are they friends with benefits? Are they in an open relationship? Either way, when Laura decides to marry him, she asks around if Jim has someone else, and only after that she asks him. Jim, on the other hand, doesn't talk to her for six weeks after her proposal. He talks to Spock and Bones immediately, but not to her. He even talks to Carol first.

Then, when Jim finally tries to talk to her about his problems, she doesn't listen. Their lack of communication is the cause of their break up.

16 years later, what we see is even worse. It's obvious that Laura has just different priorities. Maybe it's because of what happened to her lost in space, but I'm not sure. If they had married at the end of the five-year mission, would have Laura always refused a promotion to admiral? Would she have tried to get a promotion with Jim? Based on what we see in this comic, it doesn't look likely to me.

Now, as I said, different people are going to see different things, so I'm sure that someone really invested in this romance can imagine that Jim and Laura are really meant to be, and they can get their happy ending after their retirement, or in other ways. However, I admit that Jim and Laura's huge communication issues make hard to me to picture a long happy relationship between them. They should both try to get better, but in those 32 pages there was no hint towards that direction.

There's another thing that makes really hard to find any love interest for Jim as a plausible "happily ever after" option: the stakes. I know that it's just a single comic, so the creators had to focus on a few things; however, I couldn't help but notice that Jim and Laura never really save each other from dangerous situations. They work together as a team, and Jim watches Laura disappearing into the void, but does he do anything about it? Does he try to reach her inside her ship before she disappears into the black hole? Does he try to bring her back from the void? No, he doesn't.

In TOS show and movies, Jim Kirk risks so much for his crew and his ship that a Star Trek fan can't believe that a new woman is the love of his life, unless Jim is willing to do for her everything he does for his friends. And honestly, after The Search for Spock… how can he even come close to do that?

And it's not just about Jim's actions. There's his language too. At the start of the third movie, Jim refers to Spock as "the noblest part of myself". What could he say about a love interest that is as deep as this?

Let's be honest here: the reason it's so hard to write a story about Jim Kirk's true love is that the real love story for him has already been written. You may not see it romantically, but Kirk and Spock's story is absolutely a love story. And when a character has someone he loves so deeply, it's not easy to convince the audience that he could have someone new to love as deeply. In Jim's case, the combination of his personality and his canon life makes it almost impossible.

Anyway, before I end up not so accidentally turning this analysis into a complete Kirk/Spock ship manifesto, I'm just going to mention one silly thing about the Valentine's Day comic. Please, don't take it too seriously, I'm half-joking :)

So, there are two kiss scenes in the story: one when Jim and Laura start to spend a lot of free time together, and one in the last panel. Well, I can't believe Jim isn't holding Laura's shoulders when he kisses her! That's just the basis of the way Jim kisses women! D:

Different Star Trek characters kiss in different ways; it fits their personalities. And because the rest of my TOS posts are probably too gay for these gifs, I'm dropping them as references here:

Sorry, but if Jim Kirk doesn't grab someone's shoulders before a kiss, it just kills my immersion! :P

Okay, a little more seriously: Jim doesn't always kiss women the same way; however, his "shoulder grab" is common enough that you definitely notice it if you pay attention. Because of that, I think it would have been nice to include it in the Valentine's Day comic.

After reading this comic, what kind of person would I consider perfect for Jim?

Well, my answer is obvious. However, I'll try to elaborate.

First of all, this story definitely convinced me even more that Jim can only be really happy with another Starfleet officer (or at least someone who's been deeply involved with Starfleet). He also needs someone who understands him as a space explorer, without trying to keep him grounded. And someone very smart, of course. These are all traits Laura has. But they're just the basis.

I don't think Jim needs someone in command of their own ship as a lifelong partner. As I said before, I can't really imagine it working out. Another starship captain would have their own goals and their own ambitions; that doesn't mean Jim shouldn't marry someone with specific plans for their own career, but I think these plans should keep the two of them close, not on different ships. Jim needs his partner physically at his side; if he could be happy in a long-distance relationship, I believe we would have seen at least one working out in canon. But it's never the case. Working on different starships from the same fleet would be a little better, but in my opinion not enough, unless it's for a short period of time.

And there's also the matter of his partner's personality. Jim is a natural leader; that's why he's so good at his job. I don't think he needs a similar kind of leader as romantic partner. This is just my personal opinion, but I believe they would just fight about everything they disagree about. I think he needs someone calmer in his life, not someone who'd encourage emotional outbursts.

More importantly, he absolutely needs someone he can communicate with. If he can't talk to his partner about everything important, they're not the right person for him. That doesn't mean they can't have disagreements or miscommunication issues, of course, but they shouldn't happen all the time, and Jim and his partner should be able to talk about them and make up.

In conclusion: someone at his side on his ship, smart, calm, trustworthy :)

Now, I know what some of you are thinking about: what about the "no relationships with subordinates" personal rule Jim has? How can Jim be in a relationship with Spock (or anyone else on the Enterprise) if he's everyone's superior officer? Well, first of all, I already said that after The Voyage Home, Jim and Spock are both captains. And before that… I think that Spock in the comic phrased it the right way. Jim can find his happiness with someone of "equal status". I think it's pretty clear, in my opinion, that Janice Rand and Spock aren't the same kind of subordinates to Jim. Just think about it: which members of the Enterprise call their captain "Jim"? Bones, Spock and (occasionally) Scotty. These are the three people I believe are "equals" in private to Jim, no matter their ranks when they're on duty. Because of that, a relationship between Jim and Spock could work pretty well.

By the way, another thing the Valentine's Day comic made me think about is that in TOS movies, Jim sort of does with Spock pretty much everything he does with Laura in this story. Not the same way, of course, but does it matter? Spock is his own person, he's not Jim's copy. That doesn't mean he can't indulge Jim, have fun himself… and try to stop Jim from doing dangerous things "for fun", as an old spouse would :)

Okay, perhaps throwing each other into the water doesn't count as dancing, but it's so much better :D

In conclusion, this is the way I can read the Valentine's Day comic as a Kirk/Spock shipper:

Jim mentions Spock on his first date with a woman.

Jim questions his life choices as he thinks about Spock and IDIC philosophy.

Jim does with Laura everything we see him doing in TOS show, except for playing chess (just the thing he does with Spock).

Jim says Laura and him are a good team in Starfleet because they had a lot of sex (is that true about other people he works well with??)

There haven't been many ladies or gentlemen in Jim's life because he's busy (not because he's not into men, apparently).

"Starfleet is getting a lot better at partners of equal rank working together." Good for your future with Spock, Jim!

If Jim and Laura got married, they could both teach at Starfleet Academy, something Jim is totally going to do with Spock someday.

Mister "I am something of an expert on the subject of James T. Kirk" Spock.

Also, Mister "I believe someone of equal status would offer you the best possible chance of happiness" Spock, which is actual foreshadowing of his own future status with Jim.

Hey, look at Jim reading a book that reminds him of his lost love! I wonder where I've seen LITERALLY THE SAME PICTURE???

"Don't 'Admiral' me". This is totally not similar to what Jim tells Spock in The Voyage Home, of course.

Hey, we're both captains now! Just for a few days, but isn't that great? I wonder if anyone else is a captain now, and forever? :D

"I have been and always shall be your Valentine". Totally not a Kirk/Spock line, I don't know what you're talking about! :)

Okay, okay, that's all.

As a Kirk/Spock shipper, I won't deny that I'm a little jealous of this Valentine's Day special comic, because I wish we could get something with amazing art like this where Jim is in love with Spock. On the other hand, Star Trek: Year Five comic series has a few scenes about Jim & Spock's friendship that I really liked. Platonic, sure, but good enough for my K/S goggles!

Thank you so much for reading this post until the end! I hope you enjoyed my analysis! Live long and prosper!

[theendless22]

Peeta Mellark Headcanons (Modern Day Technology!):

I got inspired by a titkok I saw this morning that said Peeta would be obsessed with Minecraft and TikTok, I couldn’t help myself. 🩵

My Masterlist

Minecraft

Peeta’s your biggest fangirl, watching you play video games in awe.

This inevitably leads to introducing minecraft to him… and it’s safe to say he’s addicted!

You both have matching skins.

It starts off with a multiplayer minecraft world, you teach him the basics, laughing when he dies from fall damage.

“It’s not funny!” He pouts.

The first night is actual torture.

You best believe he’ll be shrieking at the mobs.

“HELP ME!”

*breadboy12 was slain by zombie*

(Although he’s a fighter irl I’d imagine him to be a useless defender in minecraft, but at least he tries)

Would sacrifice himself for you if you were under attack.

After the first night he’d ensure to make a house for you both.

He’d cry when a creeper blows it up.

You thought he gave up building until you see a small cottage made of birch and cherry wood the next day.

It’s decorated with a wheat farm and animal pen at the side.

“Do you like our house?” He types in chat, crouching up and down at you.

Would giggle when he places his minecraft bed next to yours.

Has every cat and dog he can find.

He’d totally make an animal sanctuary for them, after you complain they take too much space in the cottage.

Definitely makes a bakery where the price for bread is a kiss (only if it’s from you)

Peeta is definitely the flower gatherer.

Don’t be surprised when Peeta whacks you, throwing your favourite flower onto the ground.

“For you :)” is all he’d say before running away into your shared cottage.

You think his antics are cheesy, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. :)

Tiktok

Reposts his entire fyp

Definitely the biggest contributor to his 20+ hour screen time a week.

He’d insist on having a matching pfp with you.

If you say no his pfp would just be his favourite picture of you. “You’re just so pretty baby!”

Apart from bakery accounts you’d be the only person he follows. He doesn’t understand why that makes you so happy.

I’m a firm believer that he wouldn’t indulge in the tiktok thirst traps.

He’d probably block the people making them because the only person he wants to see in that way is you. 🥲

If you posted dancing tiktoks of your own he’d watch it over and over again in awe.

“You look beautiful!” He’d comment. (alongside the other 25+ comments of him admiring you)

Would actually go feral if he saw you make a thirst trap of your own.

His response would totally be: “Gnawing at the bars of my enclosure”. It’s inevitable he becomes victim to the tiktok language at this point, especially when he hears it from you.

Results in Johanna commenting under his comments, telling him to go and touch grass.

He’d get pouty at this, it’s not his fault you’ve got him acting out. :(

A big fan of the “things to do with your partner” videos.

“This reminded me of you”

Would tag you in videos along the lines of “which orange cat am I?”

Leads to a rabbit hole of watching funny cat videos.

His favourites are the cat pov videos, but he equally loves watching animal rescue videos.

He’d stumble across those baby sensory videos (the ones with the vegetables) and unironically be watching them for an hour.

Tiktok would also give him massive baby fever.

“Just the one baby, please!” “Peeta no.”

He’d send you many baby fever videos in hopes it changes your mind.

He’s a sucker for the couple TikTok trends.

“We need to do that together!”

Secretly wants to make a dancing tiktok with you.

Has a private folder full of your reposts, specifically the ones about your special interests so he can educate himself on what you care about.

“No way! I didn’t know you were a Taylor Swift fan!” (his private folder says otherwise) 👀

Results in him becoming obsessed with your special interests.

Peeta would obviously be consumed by breadtok, having thousands of saved videos in his favourites.

You’re no longer surprised when you visit and see his tiktok inspired creations.

“I saw it on tiktok!” He’d beam.

Would definitely start a colony of sourdough after seeing the “100 year old sourdough starter” trend.

Keeps up with the tiktok cake drama (if yk yk)

Scared of the yo ho sea videos (he’d never admit it)

Shits himself when you’re near bodies of water and you start singing it.

However he still watches them to tell you interesting sea facts.

Nobody can convince me that he doesn’t religiously watch the Reddit AITA videos with minecraft parkour or subway surfers in the background.

Gets heated when the person is actually the asshole.

“How could they do that?” “They suck!” “I’d never do that to you baby!”

You laugh, a small smile on your lips because it’s true, he’d never do that to you.

Additional headcanons

Peeta makes a world on the sims, spending hours ensuring you and him look like yourself in real life. In his world you and him are happily married, having multiple babies together and a few pets. He uses the sim world almost as a manifestation of the life he wants with you, as he genuinely sees you both spending the rest of your lives together.

Has a private tumblr account that acts as his diary, he often recalls his day with you, and if that day is particularly good he makes his entries in the same formation as a fan fic (He’s just that whipped) :)

(I’m open for suggestions to make more of these, feedback is appreciated!) This is the first post I’ve made in a few years so I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did making it 💗

[mandobatemans]

intrigue (Tom Wambsgans x f!reader)

warnings: infidelity, fingering, unprotected piv sex, soft!dom tom, size kink kinda, biting, greg, do NOT have sex with the head of conservative news organizations irl!!!, i am a shivcel fr anything negative abt shiv in here i didn't mean it ily siobhan 🫶, NSFW UNDER THE CUT

word count: 4,740 (i got carried away)

A/N: this is loosely based on s4 e7 but there's no real timeline so it probably takes place like somewhere around season 3 or 4? this is my first succ fic so...enjoy 🤗 & also this took me SO long to write i'm so deeply sorry to anyone who was waiting

also posted to ao3

Tom had never been a fan of the whole “open marriage” arrangement. When he thought back to that fateful night (fateful night…who else would say that about their wedding night?) what he remembered most was the look on Shiv’s face when she told him that she wanted an open marriage. On their wedding night.

It was more for Shiv anyway. Tom rarely thought about actually acting on the arrangement, whether it be out of love for Shiv or loyalty to her father, he wasn’t sure. Sure, he had kissed someone here or done oral there when high on coke, but he had never actually fucked anyone else.

Something was different, though, tonight. Firstly, they were hosting a Waystar/ATN event at their apartment, and despite being chairman of ATN, he wasn't even sure what the evening was for. Shiv had told him about it last minute, casually mentioning it as they were being driven to work, like it was dinner at Logan’s rather than hundreds of media moguls and politicians to host. Actually, dinner at Logan’s felt equally, if not more, important than tonight. A better equivalent for how nonchalantly Shiv had mentioned it would be Connor inviting them somewhere.

Secondly, Shiv had suggested, outright, that they both find someone to hook up with at the party tonight. Earlier in their bedroom, after getting dressed in silence, Shiv had turned to Tom while putting her earrings in to share the idea. He knew she would be acting on it whether or not he did, and why shouldn’t he? It had been a while since he had gotten laid and was verbally (and physically) assaulting Greg a lot more as a result.

Did he just pick someone? How did you approach someone and say, “Hey, I’m in an open marriage but I’ve never actually done anything more than get my dick sucked with anyone else…anyway, let’s fuck!”

Tom fidgeted with his glass as he surveyed the room.

Despite your personal beliefs and the endless human rights violations that Waystar was affiliated with, their (and by extension ATN) events were some of the most lavish you'd ever attended. As a political journalist, it was standard for your company to send a journalist or two to whatever soirée the Roys were throwing. Everyone took turns, and this time you had drawn the short straw. It hadn’t been too bad so far, you thought, although perhaps you were jinxing yourself. You had kept to yourself mostly, chatting with other journalists you frequently saw around the city on assignments, snacking on the hors d'oeuvres, and listening to the ridiculous conversations political and media bigwigs were having.

You had been to an event hosted by the Roys before, but they were usually at ATN, Waystar, or some expensive venue. Being invited as a member of the press to Shiv Roy’s apartment felt strangely intimate. You were certain this was some calculated business move on the part of one Roy or the other, but you honestly didn’t really care. Whatever drama was happening within Waystar Royco was contained within the Roy family. You were simply here to supplement a piece your coworker was writing on the atmosphere of this political season.

It was only an hour into the party when you had collected all the quotes and interviews you needed, and sampled almost all of the hors d'oeuvres. Your boss expected journalists to stay for most, if not all, of the night for these things, in case some political bombshell were to happen. You were pretty sure nothing too monumental was going to happen in this room full of suits, especially with all of the Roys notably absent from the festivities. Even Shiv, whose house it was, looked like she wasn't paying any attention to what was going on in her home. In fact, she had been in the corner all night, talking to some prominent New York and D.C. women, important enough that you knew their faces but not important enough for you to attach any names to them.

You checked your phone for the time. You could probably get away with leaving in another hour if you made up some family emergency as an excuse for your editor. Even another hour seemed like ages. Maybe you could re-interview some people? Speak to some guests whose quotes would never make it in the article just to kill time? Sighing, you opened your messages, thumbs hovering over the chat with your editor, putting your journalism degree to use by brainstorming an excuse to get you back home in your bed before ten o’clock. When you turned around to pace while you typed (a nervous habit), you found yourself face-to-face with one of your hosts.

It felt like a fucking cliché. Literally bumping into someone at a party? If one of your writer friends wrote something like this, you'd tell them it was bullshit and things like that didn't happen in real life. Yet here you were, inches away from–

“Tom Wambsgans, Chairman of Global Broadcast News at ATN.” He introduced himself, reaching out a hand for you to shake.

You returned the handshake, grateful that he wasn’t offended by you bumping into him. “I know who you are.”

“And I know who you are.” He paused. “That sounded stalkerish, didn’t it? I meant, I know who you are because I’ve read your articles.”

“You have?” You were surprised. Your company and your articles in particular were considered left-leaning, the very opposite of the stories ATN ran.

He nodded. “Gotta keep up with the competition. I’ve seen some of your features on the network, as well.”

“Really? I would have thought you would just watch ATN all day,” you teased.

Tom made a face and then shook his head. “No, no, no. Plus, I wouldn’t really call any of our journalists ‘journalists’ so much as pretty faces. You do your own research and look good on the camera. That’s impressive.”

You raised an eyebrow and Tom’s eyes widened, processing what he had just said.

“God, I do sound like a fucking stalker.”

You laughed, “Just a little bit.” You let him cringe for a second, then smiled to reassure him. “No, but I’ve seen some of your interviews since you took over ATN. You look good on the camera, too.” You paused, before adding, “Maybe that makes us both a little stalkerish.”

His eyes lit up at your response, earning a genuine laugh (the first one that night not faked for some suit, he noted).

“Uh, sorry for bumping into you. I wasn't looking where I was going,” you explained, waving your phone in your hand for context.

“Ah, cell phone. The curse of the twenty-first century.”

You furrowed your brow involuntarily for a moment. He wasn't how you expected the spouse of a Roy to be like. Whether that was a good thing or a bad thing, you weren't yet sure.

“I’m making a huge ass of myself, aren't I?” He sighed. “I’ll leave you to the party–”

“No! It’s okay. Stay,” you heard yourself say. It was Tom’s turn to raise an eyebrow. Okay. You found him attractive. And even despite his eccentric comments, you also found yourself wanting to talk to him more. You were, however, purposely avoiding looking at the wedding ring on his finger.

To Tom, it all seemed too perfect. You, for example. He was being honest when he said he had seen and read some of your work and that he enjoyed it, and he did sometimes watch other networks to get an idea of the competition, but he had left out the fact that there was something about you in particular that made him watch the entire segment when you happened to be on air. And the fact that sometimes he'd scroll through your articles online and imagine you reading them aloud to him. But he wasn’t a stalker. And now you were here, in his house, on the night that his wife had all but shoved him into the bed of anyone that he wanted.

But still; one pleasant, slightly flirtatious conversation didn't mean you wanted to ride off into the sunset with him. Or, more accurately, go upstairs with him.

He scanned the room for Siobhan. Although it had been her suggestion, and he knew she had acted on the arrangement before, he still felt like it was somehow a trap. Like she’d hire someone to hide behind the bedroom door that night and catch him with his pants down (literally) to use as blackmail.

But sure enough, she was across the room, laughing at something some lobbyist had said, and resting her hand on the other woman’s arm slightly longer than a casual touch would last.

The longer he thought about it, the more confident he felt. If you were interested, he wanted to spend the night with you. And maybe more. But he was getting ahead of himself.

“It's kind of loud over here. Come on,” he gestured with his head toward the opposite corner of the apartment, one not occupied by any guests save for an elderly politician snoring on the couch.

You followed him, nodding when he asked if you wanted another drink before picking a champagne flute off of a passing server’s tray. He handed it to you once you reached the corner, your hands touching during the exchange. It seemed like even more of a cliché to feel sparks fly at this tiny touch, so you ignored that, as well.

“You host these kinds of things often?” You asked, leaning against the wall and taking a sip of your champagne. The room was full of very important people, though none of them seemed to be talking about very important things. You couldn't quite wrap your head around why a high-level executive who had married into one of the largest media conglomerates was wasting his time talking to you (flirting with you?), but you had seen stranger things in this city.

He grimaced and shook his head. “No, no. I’m usually just a guest.” Tom laughed and took a sip of his drink. “And not a very important one, at that.”

“I’m sure that's not true. I mean, how many people watch ATN? And you’re in charge of what airs or doesn't air.”

“1.89 million,” he replied, taking a sip of his drink, “Outside of the office, nobody’s really worried about what I think.”

“Not even your wife?” You stopped after you said the words, giving your brain a second to catch up with your mouth. “I’m sorry, I didn't mean any disrespect, I–”

“No, no, no, no, it’s okay,” he assured you, reaching out to rest a hand on yours consolingly. Tom leaned in closer so only you would hear him, unnecessary considering the secluded corner you two were in.

“But no, not even my wife.”

Your eyes darted to his hand atop yours, suddenly aware of how large his hands were. They almost completely covered yours, and they felt so comfortable and right there, like–

“We have an open marriage,” he suddenly said.

“Oh.”

Tom seemed disappointed with this reaction, quickly removing his hand from yours and adding, “That’s just to say that, our marriage is, uh, unconventional, so her not caring what I have to say isn’t that unusual.”

You were still processing the feel of his hand on yours, much less the revelation that he actually might be flirting with you and that it actually might go somewhere. By the time your thoughts caught up with you, it seemed like he was about ready to excuse himself and go scream at his reflection in the bathroom.

“Well, I’m sorry about that,” you responded, mirroring his gesture from before and resting your hand on top of his to comfort him. “You don’t deserve that, really.”

He scoffed. “You don't know what I deserve.”

You looked up at him, taking the time to absorb the look in his eyes that revealed just how much he was going through.

“Uh, Tom?”

Tom rolled his eyes and turned away from you to snap at the source of the interruption. “What, Greg? Can’t you see I’m having a conversation?”

“It’s just–well, Shiv is leaving with someone.” The taller man gestured at the door, where sure enough, Shiv was weaving her way through the crowd toward the elevators with the lobbyist from earlier, her hand guiding her by the small of her back.

Tom bit the inside of his cheek. “Well, Greg, we do have an open marriage. So, everything’s fine. Now, scram.”

Greg looked between the two of you and hesitated for a second before nodding and disappearing back into the bustle of the party.

Tom turned back to you. “That’s Shiv’s cousin, Greg. I’ve sort of taken him under my corporate wing, so to speak. Showing him the ropes and all that.”

You nodded, finishing your champagne.

“Well,” he said.

“Well,” you echoed.

He paused for a minute, though it seemed to last much longer than that. “You’re writing an article about this party, right?”

“Yeah,” you responded, unsure of where he was going with this.

Tom leaned in, lowering his voice. “What would your editor say if you got a behind-the-scenes look at the party?”

You raised your eyebrow.

“Of course, you'd have to come upstairs…” Something shifted in his tone. You were well aware of what the change implied, and you’d be lying if you said you didn't want to jump at the offer. This wasn’t you, though. Sleeping with a married man? On top of that, not just any married man, but the host of the party that you were covering for work. It sounded like a problem you’d encounter on an Intro to Ethics exam. But any moral qualms you had about the issue were pushed out of your head when you registered the way Tom was looking at you.

“Of course,” you repeated, nonchalantly, setting your empty champagne glass on a nearby table.

Something flickered in Tom’s eyes. “Shall we?”

“Lead the way, Wambsgans,” you replied, gesturing dramatically.

Neither of you spoke for the entire walk away from the excitement of the party to the quiet of Tom’s bedroom. It looked much like you had expected it to look: modern, chic, and impersonal. You were sure Tom (or Shiv) had some personal items somewhere in the house, but the bedroom was so clean and styled that the only indication anyone slept or dressed in there was some of Shiv’s makeup and jewelry strewn haphazardly on the vanity.

When he had closed the door behind you, Tom stepped closer to you experimentally, as if he was afraid you'd flee like a wild deer if he moved too fast. You stepped closer as well, which seemed to give Tom the permission he was looking for. Within seconds, his mouth was on yours, his hands cupping your face, all tongue and teeth. There was hunger and desperation in the kiss, but it was hypnotizing, beckoning you deeper and deeper. He was almost doubled over to reach you (god, he was tall), so you shifted your weight to stand on your tiptoes.

Tom broke the kiss, leaving you with a confused look on your face.

He shed his suit jacket, throwing it carelessly on the floor. Next, he rolled up the sleeves of his shirt to his elbows. Tugging on the length of his tie, he loosened it enough to undo a few buttons at his collar, revealing an inviting expanse of chest hair.

“Turn around,” he told you, snapping you out of your male-stripper-fantasy gaze.

You did as he said, something in his tone going straight to your core. You felt him run his hands from your shoulders down your arms, then down your hips and up to your waist, the action bunching up the fabric of your dress. He moved your hair to the side, pressing hot kisses to your neck that made your eyes roll back.

“Can I take this off?” He whispered, his lips trailing up to your ear.

You nodded in response, trembling momentarily under his touch. Tom unzipped your dress, helping you push it down your body and step out of it. He unhooked the back of your bra without moving further. It occurred to you then how wrong this was, to be sleeping with someone else’s husband in their own bedroom, but to your surprise, you didn’t care. The only thing you cared about was the heat of Tom’s gaze on your bare back. You took your bra off the rest of the way and discarded it on the ground next to your dress. Once in only your underwear, you turned back around to face him, watching his eyes follow every curve of your body to drink in the newly exposed skin.

“Wow,” he said, simply, reaching out to grab you by the hips and pull you closer to him. “You’re gorgeous.”

Grinning, you stood on your tiptoes to kiss him again, cradling his face in your hands. You felt him smile back into your kiss. Before you knew it, he had you pressed against the wall, totally enclosed by his larger form. He went from kissing you on your lips to your neck to behind your ear to your chest, as if he couldn't decide which spot deserved the most attention or for how long.

One of his hands slid down to the waistband of your underwear, the cold metal of his wedding ring a shock against your hot skin. You made eye contact with him as his hand slipped between the fabric and your skin cup your cunt, whining when you felt his touch. He seemed to get off on that, capturing you in a kiss again at the same time he slipped a digit into your wet heat. You were too hot; you pressed your hand to his chest to stabilize yourself and pushed your underwear down your legs and kicked them off. Tom smiled at this, getting right back to pumping his finger in and out at a pace that almost made you melt down the wall.

It was probably a power trip thing, you thought, you totally naked and him almost fully clothed. You didn't mind because it was kinda hot, but it wasn't what you had expected from Tom based on the unassuming, Midwestern image of him that was circulated in columns and by the Roys themselves. But, then again, you hadn't expected to find yourself in this position at all when you left your apartment earlier that night.

The pace of his fingers felt so good, so intoxicating, that now that you had him, you needed more of him.

“A-another one,” you whined between kisses.

When you opened your eyes to look at him, Tom had a smug look on his face. Sure, it was arrogant, but it turned you on, so who really cared? “Yeah?” he asked, “You want another one?”

“Tom,” you hissed, gripping onto his shoulder as his finger curled in just the right way that it made your legs go numb.

The look remained on his face, but he added another finger nonetheless. Tom appeared to inhabit both extremes when it came to sex: he really wanted to pleasure you but he also really wanted to do what he wanted. Luckily, those two wants aligned.

He was making you feel so good that you needed to have more of him. Your kisses got sloppier, each so desperate to be further molded with one another that your tongues tried to push impossibly further into the other’s. Tom shifted his hand so he could angle his thumb to rub slow, tantalizing circles on your clit as he continued to pump his fingers. Your grip on his shoulder tightened–you feared your fingernails would leave dents in his skin–but like so many other things tonight, you couldn’t bring yourself to care. You could feel the pressure rising in your middle, your cunt clenching around his fingers in anticipation of your impending orgasm, but then it stopped.

You opened your eyes that you hadn't realized were squeezed shut to look at Tom, who had his hand in front of your face, fingers glistening with your slick. “Open,” he encouraged. You obeyed, accepting his fingers into your mouth and licking them clean with a ‘pop.’ He stared at you like you had hung the stars in the sky. He jerked his head toward the bed. “Sit.”

There was authority in his commands, but you didn’t fear him; from the short amount of time you had spent with him, you knew he was at his core a sweet man. You would admit to yourself that you had been curious how his awkward, nervous energy would translate into the bedroom, but once alone, he seemed to be a different man.

You watched him strip off the rest of his clothes eagerly, smiling up at him once he rejoined you on the bed totally naked. He must’ve noticed you staring, because he asked: “Do you want me to put on a condom?”

You shrugged, shifting your eyes back up to his own. “No, it’s okay. I'm on birth control.”

He sighed in relief. “Good. I don't even know if I have one in here.”

“Then why’d you ask?” You laughed, encouraged by the smile that crossed his face when you did so.

“Seemed like the gentlemanly thing to do. If you said yes, I would’ve sent someone to go get one or borrowed one from–”

“Tom?”

“Yeah?”

“Just fuck me already.”

“Alright. If you say so,” he teased, leaning down over you to kiss you. Both your lips were red and puffy from all the kissing and some biting, but it didn’t matter. You could feel his cock pushing against your stomach from the angle, so you reached down to take him in your hand and pump his length.

“Fuck,” he murmured against your skin, face buried in your neck as he pressed kisses to the every inch of available flesh, “Fuck…Can I?”

“Please,” you responded, noticing a little desperate hitch in your voice that you ignored. Tom licked his hand and cupped your sex with it, running the pads of his middle fingers through your folds a few times to collect the wetness between your legs. Gently, he guided his length into your opening

inch by inch, watching your face for any sign of discomfort before bottoming out.

You should’ve expected his dick to be big from his height, the size of his hands, his nose, whatever, but you hadn’t considered just how big. It was quite a stretch to take him fully, but he gave you all the time you needed to adjust and get comfortable. When you were ready, you bucked your hips up into his to give him the okay.

Tom took your permission to move and ran with it, grabbing your left leg and placing it over his shoulder before pressing you down further into the mattress with his body weight so he could thrust into you at a deeper angle.

You lifted your head to meet him to return to making out, the sensation of his tongue down your throat even more erotic now that he was inside of you, as well.

His thrusts were deep but not as aggressive as he had been with his fingers. He wouldn’t vocalize this, or even admit to himself that he was thinking this, but he wanted this to last. As much as it was supposed to be a hookup–emotionless sex–he found himself wanting it to happen again, despite his attempts to push those thoughts deep into the recesses of his mind.

One arm was thrown around Tom’s neck, hand gripping a fistful of his hair. Your other hand went down to your clit, beginning to rub circles to match the pace of his thrusts.

“You wanna cum again?” He teased, “Again, when I haven't cum once?”

You narrowed your eyes at him, playfully, slipping your finger down from your clit to lightly stroke the length of his cock that wasn't fully inside of you.

He let out a moan, eyes twinkling as he snapped his hips a little harder, snickering when you gasped in response.

Tom caught you in another kiss, resting his weight on his forearm that was positioned next to your head. You arched your back up into him, urging him deeper, which he obliged. “Touch yourself,” he said, disconnecting his mouth from yours just long enough to give the command.

You smiled into his lips, rubbing your clit again as his thrusts became sloppier and jerkier. He was holding on until you came again, despite his earlier cockiness. The moment he felt your walls tighten around him, he let go, spilling inside of you with a grunt.

He pulled out, rolling off of you to lay beside you.

Tom was still catching his breath, and you watched his chest heave for a few moments. “Hey, you okay?” He asked. “Everything alright?”

You smiled, nodding and reaching over to kiss him again. “I'm good, yeah. You?”

“Perfect, actually.” Tom smiled back at you. He found himself lost in the moment, lost in your eyes, lost in the connection you two had just had, and it was too much for him. Quickly, he sat up, ready to change the subject. “You need to clean up?”

You furrowed your brow at the sudden shift in his demeanor, but going along with it nonetheless. Despite him just having been inside you, you didn't feel like it was your place to mention the change. “Yeah. Can I?” You asked, gesturing vaguely toward the bathroom.

“Yeah. Oh, yeah. Go ahead. Towels are above the sink.”

You flung your legs over the side of the bed and stood, heading toward the bathroom. “I’ll just clean off real quick, then I’ll be out of your hair.”

“No, no, no. I mean, you can stay the night. If you’d like, that is. I could call you a car, though, if I’ve made some awful faux pas and you don’t want to look at me for another–”

“Tom.” He focused on you again after his brief spiral. “I would like to stay.”

He grinned. “Great, that's great.”

“Just let me–” You waved your hands around your lower body, “–clean all this up.”

“Yeah, of course, sure. I’ll be here.” He added the last part in a quasi-sing-song voice.

At the sound of the shower turning on, Tom rose to locate his clothes and try to clean up. He pulled his boxers back on, taking his dress shirt, pants, & jacket to be thrown into the hamper. They really should be dry-cleaned, he considered, but found that he couldn’t be bothered. As for your clothes, he wasn’t sure what exactly to do with them, so he laid your dress across a chair in the bedroom and left your bra and underwear on the floor. He was still considering whether he should pick them up or not when you came out of the bathroom, towel wrapped around your torso.

Once you had dressed in your undergarments again and Tom had given you an undershirt to sleep in, you started to wonder what all this meant. If it had just been a hookup, why were you staying the night? You had thought you’d feel dirty and disgusted with yourself, spending the night in someone else’s bed with someone else’s husband, but you didn’t. You didn’t know what that said about you, what it meant that you were perfectly comfortable talking into the night with Tom, both laughing and sharing stories long after you had agreed to turn the lights off and get some sleep. That almost made it worse, you thought, that it wasn’t just sex. That made it dangerous.

After you had drifted off, Tom spent a few minutes watching you sleep. He tucked a stray hair behind your ear, watching the worries of the day wash off your face while you slept. He knew it was wrong to be more comfortable in this bed with you than he was with his own wife. But that was something to deal with (or repress) in the morning. Here, now, with you wrapped in his and Shiv’s bedsheets, your form against his chest rising and falling with his breaths, he could pretend it was meant to be like this.

@swiftcession @greenwrldsz @zirrocom @lukas-matsson @ledtassoo @bluecruz97 @rita-lean @grainyimag3

[dreamwreaver]

When Vox and Charlie finally interact on screen, I hope to God we won't have another "deemed as a father figure by annoying fans" situation on our hands because I will lose it. They did it with Alastor and Charlie, they did it with Vox and Velvette, they did it with Carmilla and Zestial and I'm sick of it. I'm tired of the majority of the fandom being prone to infantilize the women that have a platonic relationship with an older man. Especially when said older man has beef or relations with another older man. I swear, most of the fandom seems to be allergic to the mere possibility of their favorite male character being with a female character that it makes me suspect they're slightly misogynistic sometimes given the way they would callously treat the female characters at times.

Besides, I personally don't think Vox and Charlie would have a father-daughter relationship because, well, Vox is the villain and really doesn't give off paternal vibes (neither does Alastor but that didn't really stop the RA shippers). Unfortunately, half of the Hellaverse fandom consists of immature people with no media literacy skills whatsoever so I'm not gonna be surprised if they begin to label the pathetic man-child of a television as Dad#3 to an adult woman.

All joking aside nonny, welcome back.

Yeah, this has been a very annoying trend across media, not unique to the hellaverse but incredibly rampant all the same. First I want to say that the Vees not being an actual polyamorous Vee is a missed opportunity.

Second, I really cannot see Vox being a father figure as anything more than a bit. Like he can't get to Charlie through being a romantic interest (canonically because of vaggie and possibly al?) so he'd try to pose himself as a shrewd businessman that makes exceptions for family or something. But much like Al's comments to Lucifer in Hell's greatest dad it would all be an act. I do "ship" Vox/Luci solely because the crackship name of AppleTv is too hilarious not too so I am for it. But I was the same of a certain other ship before a very loud segment of it ruined it by treating it like endgame canon instead of the absolute crackship it is.

As for one of your other remarks, it's a problem of fandom in general these days. You saw it when certain lumity shippers got pissy that people shipped Lunter, we saw the absolute war that was the reboot of a certain mech property that I will not name to save my sanity. Like, it's not the old days where canon queer rep was slim to none and easier to get away with portraying deeply emotionally impactful relationships with men and giving a token female love interest to say they were "straight" but then again homoeroticism in media is both a super long lived trope dating back to the gayest locales in history and a rant for another day. Canon queer ships are everywhere, not overwhelming or even equal to the ostensibly "straight" canon couples in all of literature but definitely not something you'd get burned at the stake for if you said it.

That being said, in that vacuum has arisen a sort of derision towards straight passing ships. The bisexual woman is with an asexual man? Straight. The lesbian gay man who dresses in drag on the regular who nonetheless share a deep emotional chemistry (and history of brainwashing/abuse/abandonment)? Straight. If they are not actively gay they are straight and it mirrors a lot of the real life issues people in these groups face. Because let's be honest; humans are complicated. Feelings are messy. How many queer people do we see before realizing their sexuality got married and had a straight partner and even kids? Did that mean they loved their spouse any less? Ngl one of the depictions of this I've seen is why women kill's Simone and Karl

Tell me they do not love each other. You can love someone and not be attracted to them.

Welp, that was a tangent lmao. Back to your question. My favorite interpretation of Vox in relation to Charlie and Alastor is basically Radiobelle Silence. Where vox attempts to get Charlie to love him to get back at Alastor only to fall for her himself and oh no now he likes them both and is making it everyone's problem. Like Chaz from helluva boss except with money and power to back it up. The ultimate third wheel.

I think one of my discord friends did a doodle that perfectly encapsulates my view on that dynamic and if it's publicly posted I'll let you know nonny. Thanks for your ask!

[piracytheorist]

"Sy-on boy" vs. "Second son"

As someone who a) watches the anime first and then reads the manga (and doesn't read manga chapters that haven't been animated yet), b) is quite cautious about Damian's character and c) doesn't even like Damιanya as a ship, I think I have a very different perspective on Anya's view of Damian - at least, according to the point the anime has reached - to the point that I can get VERY confused whenever I see some shippers talk about that. To the point I go like "Is there something I missed?"

And there IS something I miss. And that's manga-only (or at least manga-first) context.

In Japanese, Loid thinks about Damian being the second son of Donovan Desmond, using the word "次男" (jinan) which literally means "second son".

Damian uses the same word for himself later,

and Anya picks that up from then on (though using hiragana characters instead of kanji, as she does in general). And maybe because of that use of simpler characters, the manga translation team decided to have her call Damian "sy-on boy" - a mispronounced "scion boy" - instead of simply "second son".

The thing is, though "sy-on boy" makes Anya's speech sound simpler and more imaginative, fitting her age more, it can also sound more endearing, cute and affectionate, if you lean towards that. Meanwhile, "second son" can range from neutral at best to derogatory at worst - especially considering that Damian is not dealing very well with the fact that his older brother is already an accomplished Imperial Scholar and has raised the bar very high for Damian.

Again, my first contact with the story was from the anime, where Anya simply calls him "second son".

Which, if I'm honest, already sounds appropriately silly. Who calls someone, even the second child of a family, that? Anya's use of "haha" for mama and "chichi" for papa is already kind of incorrect when she talks to them, she's young and has still got lots to learn, in the same chapter/episode she called Becky "milady" until Becky reminded her of her name, and also Damian pissed her off so she has no reason to refer to him with his name (yes I'm fully taking her side on this, bully victim for bully victim). She heard both Loid and Damian use "second son" in their thoughts, so same way she called Becky "milady", she picked that up as a way to call Damian.

I actually wonder why the manga translation team went for "sy-on boy". There's no indication that Anya heard the word "scion" ever before, so it sounds out of place, and honestly, with what I said above, out of character for her. In a weird way, though, it actually fits with how she manages a decent score in her "Ancient Language" test many many chapters later.

(I am aware that there was a fan translation of some chapters before the manga got picked up for an official translation. I have no access to the fan translation, so maybe "scion" was used there and it passed on to the official translations in that way?)

Anyway, what I mean to say is that the use of "sy-on boy" may have encouraged a more lenient and even "encouraging" view of Anya's feelings for Damian, even though through her actions and words she keeps showing that she would rather not be around him, but she has a mission to accomplish.

And with that, though I don't know any Japanese myself, I'm leaning towards the conclusion that "sy-on boy" is not a translation that accurately communicates Anya's sentiments.

And as someone who is very passionate about defending Anya's mistrust of Damian, the use of "sy-on boy" in the manga translation sounds... misleading. Maybe it just feels that way to me because I am a bit more cautious, but it also explains why some fans are so passionate to the point of saying Damian never actually bullied Anya - or to tell me to my face that I shouldn't call Damian a bully because it upsets his fans. If the manga has her use a nickname that could show she's on equal footing with him and could betray, under a certain interpretation, some hidden affection for him, then you kind of understand why people reach that point. It doesn't mean it's right to say Damian was never a bully, or to tell me that after I've shared I still carry scars from having been bullied, but you know. Fandoms will be fandoms.

[rat-rambles]

I am not waiting for the results of my own poll look at my fan kids (yes there twins).

The one with 1 eye is Star and 2 is Sphinx

So I guess this this is a full sail Au at this point so let me explain.

So basically Ford got Bill pregnant befor going though the portal and no one realized till after Ford had gone though the portal and they where defintly enemy's. This did result in Bill raising the kids till weridmagon despite Bill trying to parent trap Ford and ford trying to (kiddnap) liberate them.

Pregnant how I hear you say. Well scence in the dreamscape ideas become reality and Bill also is a idea they both basically thought of haveing kids at the same time while doing the deed and Bill's subconscious did the rest. Don't worry about the finer details it's not important.

Why baby's both human shape. Well human is dominated but. Actually Bill's subconscious has a presence for the human traits becuse he resents his triangle heritage. Both the baby's have triangle features though.

Becuse of time fuckery of realms despite it haveing been 30 years on earth the kids are 12/13 just like dipper and Mable when weridmagon happends. After weridmagon Ford and Stan take them in.

Both the kids defaulted to they/them pronouns becuse when Bill was asked about what gender the kids where he gave a "I don't know anything about human gender they'll figure it out when there older.".

Now for spefics

Star: they take more after Bill. There more magical inclined. They prefer to float and change shape at will.

There clearly the favorite even though Bill *trys* not to show it.

Despite this there the more squish one bills little pranks have made them cry on multiple occasions puting Bill in a awkward position.

Is the smart sibling despite the goofy disposition

Sphinx: is constantly compared to Ford and dipper despite Bill's best efforts.

Becuse of the constantly comparison to Ford they both want to meet him desperately and prove that there there own person equally desperately.

There not as good as puzzles as there name would sujest. It makes them deeply insure but they refuse to show it.

Grows out hair to look more like Bill in hopes of gaining his approval.

Ironically feels outcast by the nightmare realm becuse of being "to normal" despite best efforts to match there freak.

There very protective of Star becuse of Stars scentive nature. Sphinx knows Star is used to constant praise and when the drip stops Sphinxs worries about Stars ego.

Bill does love the kids as fearcly as he can but that alone dosnt make a good parent. He is very busy and stressed but is trying. He keeps them far form any compat he sees comeing and insist they wear the bill necklace so he can always see where they are incase of porably Ford based kidnappings.

[darcytaylor]

In celebration of Luke Thompson being the lead for Bridgerton season 4, I thought I would go and watch some of his past interviews. These are just some of my thoughts throughout listening to this podcast episode. 

(this is the video of the interview which is shorter than the actual podcast)

His little chuckles throughout are so charming and adorable. Whenever I read, watch or listen to any interviews with Luke, it is always a joy. You can tell he is well educated, which listening to this podcast he admits he is. Luke tried to get into drama school twice and didn’t get in, then decided to study English and drama in University (this is where he was able to do multiple plays). After that he went on and went to RADA (a very competitive arts school to get into). 

I love how Rob Byron describes Luke - on the edge of funny guy but good looking as well. He straddles both worlds. 

This is very true and this made him able to bring Benedict to life in a way that made him a fan favourite. I think this will also be such a benefit to his career with wherever he wants to go. As much as I am excited about him being the next lead in Bridgerton, I am also equally excited to see where his career will go after. I know he loves theatre but I am sure multiple doors will open for him once Bridgerton Season 4 airs (and yes I know this is years away).

The way be talks about A Little Life - baroque level of suffering, deliberate excess of sorrow. As someone who has read A Little Life and loved the story (while also being emotionally ruined by the end), I couldn’t agree more. 

Who here has also read A Little Life? Who here got a chance to see it on stage? Who here got a chance to see it on screen?

Luke talking in French - As a Canadian I do know a little bit of French (definitely not fluent), I don’t think I would be able to hold an in-depth conversation with him, but I could hold a surface level conversation with him in French at least. Which I think is a success in my books. 

I found it funny that in this podcast Rob asked Luke directly if he was in a relationship. Luke almost answered him, but then caught himself. He says that he is normally reserved about this type of information because (being an actor) he isn’t comfortable talking about himself or talking about his life. He wants to talk about his characters and his acting, it's very respectable.

I’m excited that eventually we will get more interviews with Luke, bring them on!

[phenomenalgirl9]

Poly! Yizhan x Reader: Charmer

A/n: Could be read as the next part of ✨DRAMA✨ or as an individual story. This just has an established relationship between Idol! Reader and Idol/Actor Yibo. The reader is a KQ girl group member.

⚠️There's a lil bit of smut, so beware.

Summary: You've known your boyfriend was bisexual. But what will you do when you find out Xiao Zhan is actually his ex and the guy is now flirting with you, even though he knows you're dating Yibo. He says he doesn't want to take you from him, then what is his motive?

----------------------------------------------------

"My girlfriend speaks CHINESE?!" Yibo exclaimed at his manager who was equally shocked as yours.

"Babe! We've been dating for 4 months! Howcome, you don't know that?!! I literally have Chinese members!" You said laughing.

"THEN WHY DID YOU NEVER TALK TO ME IN CHINESE?" He asked in chinese this time.

"Because it's weak and I don't use it much, but Wooyoung did tell you once." You said

"I thought he was joking" he said protesting.

The two managers shook their heads at your bickering.

"NOW NOW!" your manager brought your attention back to them "As we were speaking, China isn't like Korea, here we can manage the crowd and use means to not let news spread. But there it would be impossible. So?"

"We lay low" you said as you leaned into Yibo, who held you close.

"We don't want people to know unnecessarily so you'll be at your home" he pointed at Yibo and then pointed to me and said "you'll stay at a hotel, but. You can sneak in and out, we'll keep that option for you" his manager winked, as yours shook his head.

"We'll be leaving in a month, to start practice, script reading and costumes" your manager had told you.

"So basically I can't kiss you on set" Yibo pouted, you walked over to him and kissed him, your intention was for a peck, but you felt his strong hands immediately pulls you into him, closer until your bodies were smushed against each other. You feel him engulf your lower lip and suck on it as you complied with his intentions and gave in. His lips soon detached from your lips and attacked your neck, finding your sweet spot instantly and assaulting it, he inspected the area after giving it a satisfying hickey.

"You can't do that there!" You said

"I can only imagine how good you'll look in a Hanfu. How am I supposed to control myself?" He said tucking his head in the crook of your neck, rubbing his nose in a line, up your neck, as a shaky breath left your lips.

You both parted ways as you left the plane in Beijing. He left through his assigned door as you left yours, after waiting 2 hours in the airport. Yes you could have left on two different flights but Yibo insisted on either of you waiting. You walked out of the gate and were swarmed by body guards. You waved at your fans who cheered you on.

You reached the hotel and crashed on the bed as your phone rang, "Yes?" You asked

"Reached safely?" Your boyfriend asked.

"Mhm"

"Tired?" He asked

"Very" you mumbled

"Get something to eat first and then rest, I'll see you tomorrow morning before practice, okay?" He said

"Yeeeaaaa" you said and ordered some food before getting a shower.

You brought out the script as you dried your hair with your towel. Damn the directors are bolder this time. There are literally kiss scenes, you had one. You've already watched Yibo kiss another girl for acting, but you didn't know how you'd feel with the idea of his bring close to a guy in that sense. You'll meet the other cast today, you're actually looking forward to meeting Xiao Zhan and Liu Haikuan, they have been your favourite cast since back in the days.

It was not early in the morning (if you can call it that) when you heard your phone ring "Hello?" You said groggily.

"Babe. Open the door" you heard your boyfriend's voice.

"When you said you'll see me in the morning I had actually expected it to be after sunrise" you said as you walked to the door to open it. You felt his hands instantly push you inside and pull you to him, he held you close with one hand and used the other to lock the door.

"The thought of you being here but not beside me was killing me" he whispered.

"Your down bad" you said patting him

"You're worth it" he said pulling you into a loving kiss. You pulled him to bed and the two of you got cosy and fell asleep in each other's arms.

"Are you excited to meet Xiao Zhan again?" You asked Yibo as he ate his toast.

"Um.. I-I I-" he fumbled "I gotta tell you something, babe" he looked at you.

"What happened" you left trying to tie your hair and sat beside him, his eyes were glossy. "Baby whats wrong?" You asked

"I am- Zhan ge and I had a thing, like-" he started.

"Like a ritual?" You tried to help him, but he shook his head

"No I mean we um-" he stuttered again and then you got it.

"Oh my god!! Don't tell me you're saying what I think you're saying! Yizhan was real?" You asked

"What? Yes" he said looking down

"Are you bisexual?" You asked and he nodded "Ok. It's okay. I'm glad you told me" you said holding his hand.

"You're not angry?" He asked

"No. Surprised yes, but not angry" you said smiling and pecked his cheek. As he pulled you into a hug.

"I get it, it's nerve wracking to having to shoot with your ex" you patted his back "But you can do this Bobo" as he nodded. So, finally, after kissing all over your face and neck he left. You smiled at yourself and at the thought of your boyfriend. Soon, you started getting ready. You can't act intimately on the set, but you can't act unacquainted as well because it's a fact that you've done a drama together. So, it's friends. Hardly did you know what was waiting for you.

You entered the set greeting everyone with your manager. Your eyes landed on Yibo who smiled and waved at you as you waved back. You introduced yourself and were immediately swarmed by Zheng Fanxing (Lan Sizhui), Qi Peixing (Jin Ling) and Ji li (Nie Huisang). You looked around and found Xiao Zhan looking at you, did he smirk? Must be my imagination you thought as you spoke to them about the directors and scenes. You were playing Lan Sizhui's love interest, Nie Mingjue's daughter. So most of your scenes were with the juniors and Nie Huisang. Soon the directors came and welcomed everyone. That day you all practiced greeting, and bowing and talking politely. After lunch you ran a few scenes.

You were excited for the new day, Yibo had spent the night and left in the morning. This was the day for dresses, your character is supposed to wear Grey and blue. When you were all dressed up, you left the room to show the others. Fanxing, Ji Li and Peixing started clapping and cat calling, you found Xiao Zhan walking towards you he walked up to you and bowed "Hello, Nie Gunia, you look wonderful today" you immediately bowed back and said "You flatter me, Master Wei" you felt nervous. There was something in his aura, that intimidated you. And he walked walked away. You heard your phone notification

Bobo sent a message:

Baby you look ravishing.

🥵😘😘

-You look so handsome

-I can't believe I am seeing you in this outfit!!!

Someone's EXCITED

-Shut up

And you looked at him to find him looking at you. Your manager cleared his throat and you immediately looked away. Unknowing you two, a pair of eyes were already on you two. During practice Fanxing (Lan Sizhui), Peixing (Jin Ling) and Guocheng (Jingyi) helped you alot and you were actually having fun running lines with them and Ji li occasionally. There came a scene when Xiao Zhan held your hand to protect you from a corpse and it took everything inside Yibo not to pull you away from the man he almost dropped his character.

_____________________________________

1st day of shoot

You had your make up and dress up done and were waiting for the others to step out when Xiao Zhan walked up to you and you greeted him, he was still in his regular clothes. "You seem nervous" he said. "I still get the 1st day chills" you said "like even after performing so many times I still feel giddy before I step up on stage". "Well I do too, both actually so I understand" he said. "You? Impossible" you said. "No really. I'm human too" he said. This moment talking to him, you had forgotten all the past smugness, this seemed and felt real. His bunny smile felt real and you felt blessed to have seen it in person. Fanxing and Peixing soon left the make up room as Xiao Zhan greeted them and walked in. Gosh you almost hurt your neck to look up to him, literally. When you walked on to the set you found Yibo there waiting for you, well he said he just wanted to get the feel of the series back before his parts came up. "All the best" he told everyone, while passing you with a smile. One by one the scenes were being done. Your stylists running and fixing your make up and hair often. Sometime among this Yibo also got dressed. "You look good" you tell him in korean, "Yeah I get that a lot" he replied smugly and you shook your head.

Later in your hotel room as you lied down you received Yibo's call. "Hey baobao" he said making you blush you still weren't used to it even after all these months. "How was the rest of the shoot?" you asked as your group was done earlier. "It was not awkward, me and Zhan ge actually cleared the air. He was actually praising you, your accent and stuff" he teased. "What about you though?" You asked. "You look really pretty in them. But that Fanxing (Lan Sizhui) better keep his hands to himself" he said with his gremlin smile. "Gave you some deja vu?" You laughed, ne he wasn't necessarily jealous as you have worked on the same drama with different love interests. "You're still wearing make up?" He asked noticing now, "Yeah I came in just an hour ago, me and the other juniors went for dinner first" you said and watched Yibo pout. "Why are you pouting?!" You asked, "they can hangout with you like that, I can't even hold your hand in public" he said and you laughed at his cuteness.

_____________________________________

3 weeks into filming

"Ssup?" You heard the voice and almost got shocked, you were early to set and were waiting while reading your script, Zhan's voice startled you. It was one of your first scenes with him and Yibo today and you were excited. "I'm excited to finally meet the infamous Wei Ying" you said. "Hey, you meet him everyday almost" he said with a charming smile, that almost (ALMOST) made you blush. "Not this way, like directly, you won't understand" you said. "I wish I would" he said and walked off not before passing you a wink.

"What was that?" Guocheng (Jingyi) asked. "What?" You said. "Zhan gege was flirting with you!" He said excitedly. "No he was just being friendly" you said. "Yeah yeah of course you'd say that, you only have eyes for Yibo" he said. Your eyes went wide "WHAT?" you asked. "What? You don't have a crush on Yibo?" He said with a face that said he wasn't even joking. "Who doesn't" you said brushing it off and running away with a sigh of relief when your stylist called for your turn.

_____________________________________

"Master Wei, Hanguang Jun" you said bowing, as they bowed back. "Sizhui, report" Yibo said in his deep Lan Zhan tone. "Hanguang Jun, there are walking corpses all around, they seemed to be quite potent but not under control or anything" he said. "CUT" the director shouted. As all of you sighed in relief and walked off to the nearby chairs.

Yibo, Zhan ge and Fanxing literally picked up their skirts calling it ventilation, they all had shorts inside, so did you but it wasn't appropriate now was it. So, you sat there struggling in the humid weather, fanning yourself with the portable fan, suddenly your felt more breeze. You turned to see literally 2 more fans pointed at you. Zhan ge and Yibo, "Guys I'm fine" you said. "It's okay" two said at a time. At a distance you see Guocheng giving you a knowing smirk and you glared at him.

You were anxious for the next scene, this was your first fight scene, even though you've done these back in Korea, but this is the first with a sword. And you were excited, you have practiced a lot. As the director gave his queue you and your opponent started. And after 3 takes you were finally satisfied. And you hung from the harness, Fanxing who was also beside you asked "So how was it?". "I loved it" you said and he laughed at your excitement. You were given rest for the rest of the day. You went to get your make up off when you noticed your manager not where he generally stays, you checked your phone and found hid text.

-Y/n, please get a cab to the hotel, I have to handle some emergencies.

"oh damn" you cursed. "Where's manager nim?" Yibo asked and you showed him your screen and he said "It's okay I'll drop you".

"Something wrong?" You heard Peixing ask and you explained your situation. "But Yibo's house is in the opposite direction, I on the other hand would pass through there. Come Y/n I'll give you a ride. Yibo could go home and rest" he said. "But-" Yibo tried to protest but his manager stopped him and you were left with no other choice. You got into the passenger's seat of Zhan ge's car and he smiled at you before driving away.

"I must say I'm a huge fan of your group and your acting. Loved the music style it's so different that the other gurl groups of your time." He said. "We try, it's all thanks to the pd-nims" you said. "You write songs too, don't you?" He asked. "Yeah" you shyly said "I have a habit of carrying my equipment everywhere" you added. "I know how it is" he said with this charming smile, your heart skilled a beat and you internally regretted, get a grip Y/n. "Yeah the activities need to keep going" you said. "Did you eat something? I'm hungry, let's get some ____ (your favourite snack)?" He said and You nodded. Gosh you were really hoping to get to the hotel soon, Yibo might be waiting there. He went through a drive through and ordered. "So, what about you and Yibo?" He asked, his eyes said he has been dying to ask this question. "W-what about us?" You asked, shit you stuttered. "Aren't you dating?" He asked "C'mon we're friends now right". "No we're good friends" you said even saying that sounded wrong, but duty calls. "Really? But your eyes say otherwise" he said looking dead into your eyes. You tried to get something out of your mouth but nothing came, so you resorted to advert your eyes and take a bit of your food.

When you reached you bowed and thanked Zhan ge "You don't have to bow you know" he said. "It's a habit" you said and bid him bye and walked inside. You rushed to your room, opening it to find your man waiting. He stood up as soon as saw you he stood up. He didn't see you that much this week, outside shoot. You jumped onto him and he caught you as he pulled you as close as he could. "I missed you baobao" he said. "Me too babe" you said. And you crashed your lips onto his, him immediately reacting to them like it was second nature. He shoved his tongue inside your mouth as he put you down on the bed and climbed on top of you all without breaking away the kiss. You grabbed him tight against yourself as he tilted his head to gain better access. He finally broke away and immediately attacked your neck with kisses careful to not leave marks. You pushed him off yourself and climbed on him and pulled him by the neck and kissed him eagerly, pouring all your feelings for him in the kiss, you undid his buttons and peppered kisses, he moaned as you kitten locked his nipple, you knew he liked it and gosh did you love to hear his moans as one of his hand was on your neck and the other gripping the sheets. He pulled off your top in one go and felt you up and you kept abusing his neck and nipples additionally grinding onto him, making both of you moan. You felt him hard against your core and knew you were wet as well. You kissed your way down. And lets say the two of you were soon moaning messes. You ended up cuddling naked and going to sleep.

_____________________________________

"I can't believe how you call them the boys, like how you refer to us as the girls" Nix, your group member said, her pout visible through the screen.

"Oh come on, are you really jealous of the Juniors?" You said laughing. You laughed, "But actually today, even Yibo, Zhang ge and Haikuan ge were there" and the girls 'awed'.

"Is it just me or isn't Xiao Zhan to cozy with you, he and Yibo literally follow you around" Aera pointed out. "Now it's justified for Yibo, he's your boyfriend but Xiao Zhan" Nix shook her head "Even in the leaked photos, his eyes are mostly on you" she added but you brushed her off. "It could just be the moment, any ways, I'm returning the day after tomorrow for the festivals and cons. I miss Soojin's food." You said. "I'll make you a good meal" Soojin said from across the screen, and you smiled. "Will Yibo stay there?" Nix asked and you nodded.

Later that night

-I heard you're leaving for Korea -xz

Yeah :) got group schedules. I'll be back in a month tho.

-The set will be empty without you.

Please, you'll hardly notice me gone.

-Not true

:)))

It was strange, he could have written that in the group chat, but you shrugged and went to sleep. The next afternoon you walked in and found Yibo, Zhan and Yubin laughing at something, you felt happy to see his playfulness come back. You were almost worried about leaving him here alone. Thank god he's warming back up.

_____________________________________

Back In Korea

"You're joking!" Aera said as you and her went back to the dorm, she came to pick you up, it was great to get your leader alone, you needed to talk to her alone and this was secretive stuff.

"I swear" you said, she sat for a moment still trying to wrap her head around this new info. "That makes him Bisexual, right?" She asked and you nodded "Maybe Xiao Zhan is too" she said. "I doubt it, he must be gay, and no he doesn't flirt with me, he's just friendly". "But Y/n was it okay to leave him there alone while you're miles away?" She said. "We do it all the time, what do you mean?" You asked. "Yeha but you don't leave each other with the other's ex's all the time, said ex who seems to be a smooth flirt" she said. "No. He would never do that to me. And even if he does" he stopped and sighed "We'll see". "More like me and girls will whoop his ass" she said with her fists in the air.

You and Yibo talked almost every other day, when you weren't half dead from practice. The Juniors video call you from the set often to tell you how much they miss you. They even watched your kpop festival performance and made a video of them cheering sending them to you and congratulating you on your performances. Xiao Zhan also texted you often, telling you how great you looked and did or random things that happened at set, or how Yibo messed up or he did and one teased the other.

_____________________________________

You were excited to go back to China, you missed your boyfriend to pieces. So much that you went straight to set to meet him. You saw him do a scene and stood in the side lines. As the director yelled "Cut", a few staff came up to talk to the actirs on scene, namely Him, The Juniors and Zhan with Yubin at a corner. You walked up to them and Yibo's eyes lit up and without even realising you ran into his arms and he hugged you back. "Your back" he said, in his Lan Zhan voice and you giggled, suddenly realising what you did, but you kept your calm. You released and went on to hug each of the juniors who welcomed you with open arms, Yubin you side hugged you and Xiao Zhan, who gave you a warm engulfing hug. You couldn't help but get lost in his scent, his own mixed with the scent of his colon. You snapped yourself out and pulled away.

They all told you how much they missed you and Zhan suggested for all of you to go for dinner, they all insisted and you agreed. You noticed how playful Yibo has gotten teasing Zhan ge. You smiled seeing him happy in his element. The dinner was fun as always, you sat with Yibo on one side and Zhan on another, both constantly making you laugh. At a point Yibo's leg brushed against you and you let it there for a while. Yibo and decided to 'drop' you at your hotel. All of you went to your different ways. You two discreetly walked inside the hotel, he ripped off your mask and attacked your lips with his. "I missed you" he said and hugged you tight.

He told all different things that happened, things that reminded him of you and how much he missed you. How much he wanted to be there and watch you perform and how everyone was in awe for your performance. You told him about the new idols you met and the groups you watched. And you ended up cuddling and talking until you two drifted off.

Shooting the next segments was fun as they were mostly outdoor segments. China was a beautiful country and shooting and seeing new places was fun. You were a lot closer with the others too, and being away from the main city gave you and Yibo a lot of time to sneak around.

Zhan, Yibo and you went on coffee. "One (Your favourite drink other), One Americano and One Iced Latte" Yibo said, at the counter and you were surprised for him to know both of your and Zhan's orders by heart. Yours was quite obvious as he brought you coffee quite often but- You didn't think much. The three of you immediately got engrossed in a conversation, about the new advertisement campaigns these two were doing, they did a lot of these when they did the first season, when they were dating. You smiled and wondered if you could ever get there? In a campaign with your boyfriend. "What's wrong Y/n?" Zhan asked and you shook your head "Nothing, I was just thinking about the script" you said and smiled.

You looked at the time and cursed "My next scene is scheduled next, I better go, see you both later" you said and walked back to the set, some people looking at you as you passed, of course they did, you were wearing a full-fledged hanfu.

"How dare you?" You said and pulled out your sword, pointing it at the other guy's neck, "Let it go, Y/n. He's not worth it" Fanxing said, and you gripped your sword tighter, eyes never leaving the man "I'm sorry Gunia, I didn't know" he man kept pleading. "huh" you mocked and put down your sword and turned around, making sure the long sleeves flip as you do so. And walked away pushing Peixing. "Cut" the director yelled. "That was so good Y/n" Peixing said, "you looked like you'd really kill him" he said and suddenly you heard laughter. You all looked toward the vanity and found Yibo and Zhan messing around and laughing as Yibo hit him with his long sleeves. "Thank God they are back like how they used to be" Peixing said. And then it hit you like they used to, back then, when they were dating? Are you missing something? Was Aera! No. He would never.

They both stayed back, that is where he stays, it's too convenient, be careful Y/n. The voices rang in your head. Was that the reason why Zhan was so friendly with you? Was that his motive all along. You breathed in and out. No, you can't jump into conclusions. You needed to calm down.

"Y/n, are you okay?" You heard Guocheng's voice. "Yeah? Yeah, I'm absolutely fine" you said pulling a smile. "Really" he asked, his face said he saw through you, but you nodded your head.

_____________________________________

However, your world came crashing down on you 3 days from then, when you walked into the wrong vanity and found Zhan holding Yibo's hand hus word "I still do love you Yibo", and the reply came "I know, I- Y/n?" Yibo's eyes went to you and he pulled away his hand. "Y/n baobao, it's not what it looks like" he rushed after you. "Don't. Ever. Call. Me. That" you said. "Y/n please listen" Zhan followed him, approachung you from the other side and you put the prop sword in your hand on his chest, keeping him at a distance. "I don't want a word from either of you. I trusted you Yibo, I thought you'd tell me if you ever felt something like this. I know I'm nothing like him and you could always love him. But, at least I deserved honesty!" You said tears in your eyes. "Y/n it's not-" Yibo started but you cut him off. "Save it. Don't ever show me your face outside the set" you said and walked away.

"That bastard, I'm booking a flight right now" Aera said. As you cried and your members were teary eyed too. "No, don't be stupid, you still have your Show to conduct" you said. "We cannot leave you like this okay" Soojin said. "Then I'll go" Nix volunteered "I'll accompany Y/n unnie and visit home later" she shrugged. "You don't have to do this for me please-" you were cut off. "NONSENSE SHE'S GOING THAT'S FINAL, SHE'LL BE IN THE FIRST FLIGHT TO BEIJING CITY" Aera said and you lied down having your member would of course feel better. And that happened the next evening when you reached your hotel, you ran into Nix's arms, you didn't have shooting but other side projects that came along with this project.

"I'm so sorry you have to go through this. When do you have to shoot next?" She asked. "Tomorrow" you deadpanned. "It's okay, I'll fend them off, I'll stick to you like gum" she assured.

_____________________________________

Hence, the next day Nix went with you, she was true to her word. When Yibo tried to approach you, she stared him down to a point be couldn't even walk close to you and so was Xiao Zhan. They both knew that you weren't going to listen to either of them. And a week went, Yibo came to your room a couple of times, but was driven away by Nix. Even his manager tried to call you but your manager helped you in making it stop. Meanwhile you felt like crying even when you looked at him, doing the scenes were so tough. Even the others noticed how you seemed off all the time.

You were angry in Yibo for cheating on you, but you also felt cheated by Zhan, as you knew he flirted with you but found him professing his love for Yibo. You were angry at yourself for letting this happen to even have intrusive thoughts of Zhan. You were cursing yourself for even trusting these two men.

A week went by, you were feeling much better, you managed to not feel like crying and stopped having bad dreams. Nix had to go back and so she went home, though your members didn't want you to be alone so Aera and Soojin video called you. You heard the bell ring and you bid them farewell thinking it was your room service. You opened the door to see the last person you expected it to be.

"Please let me in" he pleaded, looking deep into your eyes. His eyes were screaming at you and you did, you moved aside letting him in and closing the door.

"5 mins" you said looking straight at Xiao Zhan. "Okay, what you thought was wrong, Yibo wasn't cheating on you per say" he said. "Did he send you here to spew all this bullshit?! You didn't even know" You asked him sheeting in anger. "I knew you two were dating and Yibo doesn't even know I'm here. But please trust me I wasn't trying to snatch your boyfriend from you" he said. "Really?! Cause it seemed to be like that was your intention to get me to be comfy with you and then you take him away" you said. "NO NO. I WOULD NEVER.-" he was cut off by you. "You left me alone, you took him away! I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU" you said. "I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG! ONLY THING I DID WAS TO LOVE YOU!" he said. "Excuse me what?! Are you tryna two time us or something?! Weren't you telling Yibo you love him? The fuck is wrong with you?" You said. "Yibo loves you" he said and you scoffed but he went on saying "but he loves me too. I knew I was still in love with him but the more I saw you, the more I fell for you too". "What do you even-" but he stopped you and continued. "I didn't want to break you, I wanted to be a part of you too. And don't even lie two, I see the way you looked towards me how your body acted towards me" he said and put his palm on your cheek, you tried to flinch but you couldn't, he caught you. "We both love you so much. But, it depends on you. If you say yes we could give it a try, but if you say no, I'll walk away, please don't leave Yibo, he's lost without you. I am too, but it's essential for me that the two of you aren't hurt." He said and tears stung your eyes, you fisted your palms and hit his chest as you broke into more tears and hit your face in his chest. You couldn't hold it in any longer. It's true your own head has been a mess. And now things looked clear but were you really up to this.

"Please say something. I swear we can figure this out. Please" he said he pleaded, you look up to see that even his eyes were red it's that you noticed tear stains. "I need time" you finally said pulling away. And wiped your own tears "leave" you instructed and he did wordlessly with his head down.

The past few days were gloomy on the set nobody talked much, laughed much. You three weren't seen together for over a week. People were talking a lot. You on the other hand were running late the next day, having been thinking the whole night and not getting any sleep. No you've never cared what people said but can what he said really happen? And you looked up on the internet to see there have been many in the past and are still there. It's not something odd or unlikely. You thought back to Yibo to all those memories and Zhan, could you really give it a try. This thing Zhan suggested.

You were still contemplating when you were buying coffee, later at noon, if you should do it. And you finally did it, you walked to the vanity of the two main protagonists and pulled the door open and entered startling both the men inside. Both silent, almost forgot to breathe, watching every move you make. You simply walked up and took a seat on the couch, placing the three coffees, on the table and smiling at the cups.

It's as if Yibo knew what you were thinking, he rushed to hug you the impact, sent you both backwards falling on the couch, you could see tears in his eyes. "I thought I lost you, I thought you'd never see me again. Oh God! Y/n I missed you baobao" he kept on rambling, it was actually the first time he was so vulnerable in front of you. It was almost to a different level. You slowly sat up with him still attached to you, you looked up at Zhan who looked at you with a faint smile. You were holding and patting Yibo with one hand, you extended your free hand and signalled him to join you both and he literally rushed in to hug the two of you. You thought you'd feel strange but you didn't, you strangely felt at ease after a long time. "I don't know how this works but I'm willing to give this a try and see how this works" you said and immediately felt two pairs of lips on both of your cheeks and closed your eyes feeling a blush creep unto your face. "I love you" the two said almost in sync, "I love you Yibo and Zhan ge, I realised how much I fell for you even though my feelings for Yibo were intact. How much you meant to me, how much I missed you. And how much this thought excited me." You confessed.

Life came back to the set in no time. Currently you were giggling at how your hair was flying every time you did jumps on the harness. You were literally laughing as you hung while Peixing and Fanxing were laughing standing below along with Yibo and Zhan ge.

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The three of you went to get coffee together like before. Sometimes dinner, it was one such day that you finally got the courage to invite them to your room. "We don't have shoot tomorrow right so, do you wanna come upstairs, watch a movie or something?" You said. And they agreed, they both let you choose a movie and you put on a studio ghibli movie. "Come here" Zhan ge said, patting at the place between him and Yibo. You laid on Zhan's arm as Yibo engulfs both of you with his arms. It was comfortable, being there with the two you loved. Their smell was intoxicating to you, and you felt bold, you contemplated if you should act on your impulse and your impulse won. You placed a kiss on Zhan and then on Yibo.

Yibo took no time to immediately connect your lips to his, moaning into your mouth as if he's been dying to do it. He pulled away and held your chin turning it towards Zhan. Who looked towards your eyes as if looking for permission which you granted and he placed his lip on you it was soft at first, but you lightly bit his lip and he moaned when you felt Yibo's lips on your exposed neck, leaving kisses. You felt two sets of hands roaming your body and it turned you more on. You pulled away and ducked down, pushing their faces towards each other, their kiss was hot and filled with want. Suddenly, Yibo pulled away and pulled you up in a sitting position so as you were on his lap but facing Zhan. You felt Yibo's member against your clothed ass, as he pulled down the shoulder of your shoulder to gain better access and Zhan kissed you, holding onto your waist, as he made you grind onto Yibo. Yibo reached out one hand slinding down to your core other to Zhan's and you both moaned in each other's mouth.

Soon Yibo picked you up and laid you down on the bed. "May I?" Yibo asked, holding onto your top, and you nodded. "You both too" you said and in one pull both pulled out of their t-shirts. Damn, it was like you were in bed with two gods. Fine body, and their smell was clogging your brain. You were pushed down as you felt a pair of lips on your chest, looking down to find Zhan and then a pair between your legs kissing your inner thighs. "Fuck" you cursed, you knew you were done for.

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"I've been dreading this day" you heard Zhan say. "What's wrong?" You asked. "It's that scene today"Yibo said and then you realised it was the day your little kiss scene with Fanxing was scheduled. "Trust me, I have faced worse" Yibo declared, remember the other time he had to witness you deeply kiss your love interest.

"He better not lay a hand on you" Zhan said. "It's just acting gege" you said and got ready for the scene. The scene is simple, you fall on top of Sizhui and your lips touch for a moment.

Yibo laughed as he watched Xiao Zhan watch you do the scene. "This Fanxing is having too much fun" "Was it supposed to be this long" "At times I wished your sword was real". To all Yibo responded with "It's okay" "Calm down" "It's acting".

You on the other hand had to do the same scene 4 times, half way by the second Yibo had walked off taking Zhan with him. "Oh god really?" You said as you laughed and took the piece of nugget into your nugget into your mouth that Zhan ge was holding for you. "Yeah, I had to hold him down" Yibo said rolling laughter.

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The promotions were fun #Yizhan/n has been trending, since you started going from city to city. Watching the fans fangirling over the boys was something. It was your first time giving interviews in chinese, without your members and you were nervous. Whenever a question was thrown at you and your face went blank Yibo knew and would rush to your ear to explain it in Korea, you didn't even had to ask.

You were sitting in your room sitting and scrolling through your private twitter account, seeing what the fans have been posting when a tweet thread caught your eye.

You smiled and clicked on the thread. It was filled with various comments.

It was true that Xiao Zhan travels ALOT, but it's also true he has been visiting alot. Yibo has always been on both sides, but the three of you try to take time out for each other, as 2 or sometimes as 3. Try to spend time even if it is on a video call. And that the three of you often went out, cause it's difficult and not always all three can be at the same place so you try even if its any 2 at the time. You often get insecure and the two always give you assurance. "We found what we were missing the last time. It was like something was missing" Yibo said. "Yeah like there was a missing piece. And It's you, Y/n" Zhan said. "You completed us" Yibo said. But you shook your head and said "in the end we all complete each other. It's us three, that's it" and the two kissed your cheek and you felt all your insecurities melt away.

You were smiling to yourself while sipping coffee and reading comments when one comment caught your eye and you choked.

Imagine? Well. You though.

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