#i was expecting trauma but this......this ruined me
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WANDAVISION DEEP DIVE part 1
(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])
(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3])
After managing to keep away from social media for almost two months, here comes Agatha All Along sucking me back in 🙃 I want to rewatch the whole thing and see how many details I can catch, but I guess I might as well go through Agatha's scenes in Wandavision first. and you guys are coming with me!! we can all hyperfixate together (spoilers from both WV and AAA below. this is going to be just a stream of consciousness as I go through scenes, don't expect anything elaborate)
SO.
Agatha arrives in Westview attracted by Wanda's Hex. She might already suspect she's dealing with the Scarlet Witch because lbr, who has that sort of power? She takes a calculated risk to come investigate (detective Agnes of Westview on the case!) It's funny that her calculated risks are always way more emotional than she'd admit, because who in their right mind comes after the SW? But all that power is too alluring, so Agatha takes possession of Ralph's house, ruins the market value adding a creepy basement and brainwashes him into being her husband/minion/pet.
And now it's time to do what she does best, con artist is gonna con! I adore that Agatha became one of the most infamous witches in history thanks mostly to her improv skills.
She's a magical gal is a small time locale!! he's a husband who's part machiiiiiine (great now it'll get stuck in my head again)
worth nothing that both witches and androids have historically and culturally been used as queer allegories, and here's a very sapphic witch pretending to be a straight 1950s housewife and another witch who's got an elaborate fantasy going on where her husband is able to pass and all their problems are sitcom-level fixable.
How to solve the Hex mystery according to Agatha Harkness:
step #1, casually fish for personal info
step #2, flirt with your suspect (obviously)
she literally asks if Wanda's single ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
AGATHA
she's lying it on soooo thick
she dropped that pot so deliberately LMAOO stinky chaotic goblin
knowing she' s being an asshole on purpose makes this scene 100 times funnier tbh
(also a moment of silence for Sharon's irreparable trauma. her last words will be "Wanda, I'm begging you, let him breathe, please")
episode 2: Agatha keeps being a menace
And knowing now that she's always playing a part and her real personality is much more emo makes it easier to spot when she slips out of character
"was that too much? might rein it down a lil bit" (btw I'm still suspicious of Dennis the mailman and totally expect a big reveal in Westview season 3)
I'm betting that this was Agatha rather than Agnes too. she's so miserable lol. she hates playing this part so much. and that wig is hideous
not Agatha casually planting the idea of children in Wanda's head. She probably was the one making people chant "for the children" too. literally manipulating Wanda into showing her if she can create life, calculated risk my ass, she's out here playing with fire
(does that mean that Agatha is a liiiiiiitle bit Billy's and Tommy's parent too?? she planTED the sEED. hear me OUT.)
you know she was dead inside at having to sit through the whole talent show. she probably took it out on the contestants and made them trip onstage or something
Episode 3 of pappappa pappappa wandavision!
Agatha helping Wanda to pick baby clothes, I'm going to sob. (look at this technicolor filter! modern shows CAN color their shit! it's just that they'd rather make everything look like muddy ass instead)
not much from Agatha this episode except scheming to get Monica kicked out of the Hex, seeing as she's the biggest obstacle between herself and Wanda ('s powers). Also you know she was stalking the house to keep track of when the babies were born. Also also, the painted scenery! Like mother like son, it's such a big hint about the nature of the Road.
look at this piece of shit, I love her so much. And she does tend to wink when she's just told a truly egregious lie, doesn't she? it's like her little signature.
Agatha in episode 5 coming in like: LEMME SEE THOSE BABIESSSSSSS
kathryn hahn with 80s curls is doing something to me, let me tell you
so manipulative, in so many ways. and knowing what we know now about Agatha and children, imagine the turmoil inside of her!! triumph at having confirmation of Wanda's life-giving powers. nervousness about the mess she's putting herself in. exasperation at having to keep up the charade. and, most importantly, getting to HOLD A BABY BOY AFTER ALL THIS TIME (amazing, terrifying, traumatic, wonderful)
what is she doiiiing. this bitch, I swear.
OH MY GAWD I FORGOT WANDA SAID THIS. "so she keeps coming at me like a cat in heat, that's not her fault Vision, she has a Medical Condition"
"kids. can't control them. no matter how hard you try"??????? the suddenly wistful voice?????????????????????? why don't I fling myself off a cliff?????????????????? was this woman actually honestly dying inside while still having to play pretend, I can't, I cannot. And how much of Agatha's backstory was decided at this point, was Kathryn given a general idea?
Agatha and Billy, partners in crime already! Seriously, Jac Schaeffer must have had an idea of where this was going. And it's obvious in retrospect that Agatha would be drawn to Billy the most, he's a witch unlike Tommy and he's such a polite, sweet little fellow, he probably reminded her of Nicky so much?? Here's this scary dangerous witch who on one side is planning to murder everyone in the room, and on the other is fighting back the urge to go full mama bear on this kid and protect and cherish him forever. This is not what she signed up for when she decided to stalk Wanda!
She is so horrible. She is despicable. I'm allowed to say it because I love her so much! I can't remember, was it revealed that she turned a fly into a dog or something? Or did she kidnap a dog dog from a shelter / someone's garden and then stone cold killed him? No, wait, she made Ralph kill him. Do your own killing of cute innocent little creatures, you coward! Love that vest tho.
"Fix the dead!" "You can do that?" And of course she's pretending here but you know that's EXACTLY what this whole sordid Sparky affair was about, she's testing and prodding at Wanda's powers, trying to figure out her limits. There's an eagerness here that she doesn't need to fake. Who knows, maybe she was actually squeamish about killing the dog (she does have a cuddly bunny and woves him vewy much), hence why Ralph had to do it. But more importantly even if she didn't like killing a pet, even if she wasn't happy about traumatizing these kids - that's exactly what she's doing here, she's willingly hurting two children - she went and did it anyway, because her thirst for Wanda's powers is too big. She kills witches out of anger, out of fear and self-preservation. She is ultimately a selfish person, and that is what makes her a villain. It's not that she doesn't have feelings. She has plenty of feelings, she has a conscience, and she chooses to do the bad thing anyway.
"And we can't reverse death. No matter how sad it makes us. Okay? Some things are forever." These two shows above all else are about grief. You can peel this scene and find more and more layers, it was about the kids losing Sparky at first but also about Wanda losing Pietro, Wanda losing Vision, Wanda losing the kids. And it's also, DEFINITELY about Agatha losing Nicky. I need a drink.
Agatha discreetly wiping a tear in the background nbd
And I can only upload 30 pictures per post so there's going to be a part two. I was NOT planning to write so much, help. What are you doing to me AGATHA
go to part 2
#Wandavision#Agatha All Along#screenshots#character study#Agatha Harkness#Wanda Maximoff#Kathryn Hahn#agatha deep dive
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How do you headcanon regulus personality to be like? Do you feel as though James and regulus complement each other in some ways?
why yes of course! i fundamentally disagree w outwardly mean and evil regulus bc it makes no sense canonically. perhaps in an au where he separates himself from his parents and gets to be happy but regulus cares too much to be outwardly rude to people . it would impact his reputation and his families reputation like he isn’t hexing people in the hallways . he’s a professional faker (shit talks behind people’s back most definitely) and feels guilty and horrible everytime he’s plagued with an evil thought . i know many people view him as a selfish character but i think he’s fundamentally not . he puts everyone else’s wishes for him above his own . he doesn’t really exist as a person outside of his family . i do think , outside of this control, he would be sarcastic and have very dry humor , would love to read and would be very introverted but long for connection and friendship. a loner not by choice, he enjoys company but has no idea how to reach for it. i think he loves magic and magical creatures and genuinely holds a lot of love in his heart that his family disapproves of !! regulus soft black !!! not to say i think regulus doesn’t have an attitude and an edge …. i just think he has fundamentally good morals sorry! i’m a good person regulus black enjoyer i can’t help it …. of course he’s morally gray but most of the decisions he makes r caused by the life long abuse and trauma he is subject to . regulus black was suicidal as hell in those deatheater meetings the moment he turned 18 he killed himself LMFAO . i just know he was the most uncomfortable person in there at any given moment . i think vaguely threatening posh regulus is true but it is his exterior and the assumptions ppl make … and then they get to know him and realize he’s got like a little kid version of himself who holds the world with so much fascination . and it makes you sad when you realize he thinks it’s a flaw and wants to stomp it out
in this way i think he compliments james very well!! both people who really do value others and life but behave in very odd judgmental ways (regulus being a fake recluse who can’t function as a person w control over his life and opinions who is fake as hell and sarcastic whilst also having no understanding of social situations and desperate to be liked by people around him. number one peer pressure victim. 15,000 mental illnesses and a penchant for self harming behavior.) (james potter who is unfortunately consistently acting like a frat bro at any given moment : assumes everyone naturally loves him and is mostly right which does evil things for him as a person . would die for his friends but is also insufferable to be around (affectionate) . harshly judgmental to anyone who doesn’t fit into his box of what counts as a good person (which by the way regulus challenges in a way i think helps james as a character!) . looping back to the frat bro thing i think james is the type of person to throw a crazy party and convince everybody to drink and do unsafe things for the fun and when u realize u don’t have a ride home and can’t walk u are so fucking SCARED to ask to stay the night bc of his general vibes but then he ends up taking care of you and getting u pain killers and making like an awesome breakfast for the whole crew? should be the worst person you know but just beneath the surface is so much good it’s impossible to hate him.) you would never think these people would get along but then they both love quidditch and train for it like it’s their life and they are both academics with serious opinions on art and literature they would both die for even though they are often opposing . they are the first people they can have a conversation with and truly match eachothers freak on any given topic. the fundamentals of both of their characters is how much they care about life and the things inside of it . it manifests in different ways but i truly think the thesis of jegulus is that they are so much more similar than one might think outwardly , and it creates a soft intimacy between them . and also just james introducing the concept of silliness fun and happiness into regulus’ life lol!!
#they mean so much to me ….#jegulus you will always be famous!!#good regulus black YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS!!#marauders#marauders era#regulus black#rab#jegulus#james potter#snake in the lions den#ivy answers#i know many people think viewing regulus black as a good person is boring but i disagree#i see nothing boring about a good person who thinks their goodness is a personal flaw based on their grooming and trauma#and is trying very hard to act like the “bad person they are expected to be bc they think it will earn them affection from their groomers#just to realize it will not and everything they’d done has only made them miserable and ruined their relationships and dreams and hopes#you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing !!!!#if u don’t get it u don’t get it but something made regulus guilty enough to immediately decide to kill himself#when he very easily could have lived
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We all know how a lot of Luffy's opponents have been in some ways premonitions of the type of person Luffy could end up as if something went wrong in his life. For example Moria is what Luffy could've become had he truly lost his entire crew at Sabaody if Kuma had not saved them
And we know Crocodile is what Luffy maybe could've become had Luffy given up on his dreams and become jaded after losing to him. But like, when you think about it, that's not the only dark reflection of Luffy in Crocodile, is it
'Cause Crocodile, despite employing people for Baroque Works, did not trust anyone around him and did not considder anyone to be anything else but an employee to him. And we know he had been planning on taking over Alabasta for like 14 years (at the very least), BW being a thing for only the past four (pre-timeskip)
So like. Did Crocodile spend the last 14 years alone
Like yes he had his workers at the Casino and Robin etc, so he was like, around people, he wasn't like Brook who was in Total Isolation. But on an emotional level, has he not spent the last 14 years all by himself, completely detached from anyone, unable to trust or rely on anyone else?
That is sad as fucking shit, holy hell
'Cause then you compare him to like Luffy and like
Our sweet baby boy was so afraid of being alone that Luffy literally went through hell just to gain Ace's approval despite Ace trying to signal to him he wasn't interested befriending him
And through out the whole series Luffy reiterates time and time again how he needs and wants his friends around because he literally can't live without them, both on a literal "he can't cook or navigate or have fun by himself" level but also on that emotional level
And Crocodile just. Spent 14 years of his life, if not longer, alone.
Sweet jesus what happened to this man
And that just makes me further wonder, what the absolute fuck were Crocodile's Rookie Pirate days like?? Like did he have a crew or was he just yolo'ing it by himself???
Like. Mihawk's never been on a crew as far as we know. Kuma was a Revolutionary, not a pirate, but he wasn't like alone still. Doflaming, Hancock, Jinbei and Moria however have/had crews of their own. So what was Crocodile's deal? Did he have a crew before? Was he a captain or was he on someone else's ship? (Although surely the Government wouldn't offer the position of a Shichibukai to a cabin boy or the first mate, right)
And if he did have a crew, the hell happened to them??
Like we know Crocodile got his ass kicked by Whitebeard, I just find it unlikely Whitebeard would've pulled a Kaidou on Crocodile's crew and slaughtered them, that's not a very Whitebeard-y thing do, right?? ...Unless Whitebeard was just different 20+ years ago and was willing to annihilate entire crews. We don't know. Or maybe Crocodile and his entire crew were like Turbo Rotten from the beginning and Whitebeard figured they deserved to get wiped out, much like how we saw Shanks wipe out Kid's crew at Elbaf. Or maybe Whitebeard saw no reason to have mercy on someone affiliated with the World Government.
That all said, if we wanted to assume Crocodile had somekind of trauma that lead to him viewing people not only as disposable but also untrustworthy, then maybe losing people dear to him like that wouldn't lead to that mindset. Like Moria witnessed his beloved crew die and that caused him to want to create a crew he couldn't die, so he wouldn't go through that emotional trauma again.
Which leaves me to wonder. If something caused him to lose his ability to (emotionally) trust people, and if Whitebeard broke his dreams... Maybe Crocodile had a crew. And maybe they abandoned him when he lost to Whitebeard. Figuring they didn't need a weak captain who was probably going to bleed to death anyways. Or maybe the crew tried to take his head (after Whitebeard kicked his ass), after all, he was already a Shichibukai, anybody who took Crocodile's head could maybe attempt to take that title for themselves if the Government allowed it, and if not, at least gain more fame for themselves.
Either of these scenarios would certainly result in you losing your ability to rely on others. And leave you willing to spend the rest of your life alone. Who would have in them to go through that again.
Or maybe he came out of the womb unable to trust people and he was just yolo'ing it by himself like Mihawk right from the begining, who knows
Regardless I'm just
#Moon posting#Sir Crocodile#OP Meta#Me @ Crocodile: Who hurt you#No fucking wonder Crocodile was absolutely deranged in Alabasta#Dude just spent like 14 years speaking to a wall by himself. Or maybe not who knows the walls could betray him too#This man has so much unresolved trauma#BTW if true this would also make Crocodile a dark reflection of Robin. Which is a different layer of sad on its own#Like. Both expecting the other to be the one to betray them. And in the end it's Robin who shot first.#Break week in the middle of Kuma Backstory. I am in pain.#When will our husband return from the war#I need to know what his deal is so bad. I must study him under a microscope#My derangement will not know end until then#There could've been a counterargument that Crocodile couldn't trust anyone lest his Utopia Plans got ruined#And to be fair if the Government had found out his plans would've been screwed. Shichibukai Rights REVOKED#But he still seems to carry those trust issues since Mihawk is on relatively thin ice it seems#So me thinks. This smells like trauma.#The real conclusion to this post is that the Crocodile x Daz shippers are RIGHT
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I have learnt things about Geto that I wish I could unlearn
#I think I'm getting about the same amount of spoilers as a few weeks ago except now I understand them#But like. I expected so much of him#Seeing gifs of that one scene in which Gojo gets distracted because of Geto almost made me watch this a year ago#Geto was actually my favourite character in that one JJK fanfic I read that I mention so often even if he had literally one scene#I know so much of the emotional turmoil and conflict in JJK and Gojo in particular depends on him#And you're telling me he's Thanos?#I learnt a few days ago that everything pretty much happens in one year. That there's one year between Geto's death and Gojo's#I thought it would be like ten years. Ten years of the act haunting him#But no? So it's not a broken teenager who has these ideas and is killed by another teenager to stop him?#It's a what? ~30yo man saying Light levels of stupidity? Even worse perhaps?#Goodness I hope this is not so. I hope this is better written than what I am seeing#Because goddammit I can't do it. It would kinda ruin every emotional scene from then on?#That one scene I was so looking forwards about patting Gojo's back or whatever. The one in which Gojo gets distracted. It just. I don't know#I won't be able to be moved if Geto doesn't work xD#I was fearing I wasn't going to like him a lot because my expectations were big but oh my god please not like this#This is way worse than I expected. Someone tell me he actually makes sense. What's the point of this whole political play#in which no one is fully wrong and no one is totally right otherwise? What is the point of the haunting. This feels just idiotic xD#And I don't care about the traumas and all that. That works for the teen not the ~30yo man#It would have worked if Gojo would have killed him like 1-2 years after everything not like a few months ago. Last winter#After like ten years a 30yo man should have realised this plan sucks.#Even if it's utilitarian. Who is going to make clothes? Buildings? Streets and railways? Bread??? Go have a talk with Nanami please#We have been told there are not a lot of jujutsu sorcerers. How are you going to fulfill all those needs out of nothing?#And even if it were little by little so the needs could be getting fulfilled little by little too#If you decimate humans won't that cause more curses? I guess he's thinking on the long run but still this plan seems like a mess#I hope it makes more sense than it's looking it will make because of my god this would truly be the last nail on the coffin xD#I am being more and more tempted to get to Utahime and then just drop this. This is breaking my heart xD#It could be soooo good and it always almost is#And then. AND THEN. Abfksbfndbfkan#Jen pick me up. Come solve this. I am scared xD#I talk too much
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wanted to go to the gym social tn but as I was getting my stuff together to go out, a friend said smth that rly pissed me off and now I'm too fucking angry to go out. fucks sake man
#fucking hate ppl commenting on my 'self control' for being sober bc I get it all the fucking time and its so patronising !!!!!!#even if its not intended that way. dont care didnt fucking ask. especially from someone im friends with#but whatever i should know better than to expect ppl to know me#maybe other ppl need discipline to stay sober but i dont bc the alternative is a non option and always has been. not that hard for me#and i have my own self control struggles w other shit man like im not pristine and perfect fuck off. you only dont know abt the#shit i actually fucking struggle with bc i dont know or trust u well enough for that.#and i HATE when ppl fucking imply im susceptible to peer pressure. im not. dont fucking overestimate your influence#ppl act like shit is a choice like actually i have a trauma rooted fear that comes from ppl in my family dying of substance abuse thanks 👍#which i dont expect strangers to know. but my friends should fucking know that!!! but i guess its not worth remembering#whatever it doesnt matter im prolly upset for other reasons im going to go out for a walk to calm down i cant be at home right now#even more fucking annoyed that im missing the gym over this. i shouldve been there an hour ago.#i mean i could still go maybe the cycle ride would stop me feeling mad and blowing everyone up once im there. i doubt it tho#UGH. fucking whatever. whatever whatever whatever. sorry for ventposting i was typing out a longass reply#but its not gonna fucking do anything except come across needlessly aggressive and ruin the conversation#even if i really really want to be needlessly aggressive. and ruin the conversation. but i guess i have the self control to not. lmfao#what if i just killed myself. anyway i think im gonna go get some shitty fast food on this walk and watch a horror movie when im back#.vent
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AAAH I have a mutual who’s 18 and he sorta kinda is flirting with this one guy who is a minor as a joke of course ( to which a concerned anon said that it’s weird ) but I can’t help but flashback to er*s
#granted the er*s situation was thoroughly complex and the reason she did those things was her copism with not being able to pull ( LLLLLLL )#and ik that guy doesn’t mean any harm etc etc he’s not messed up like some ppl#BUT I DUNNO STILL#sobbing#they’re pretty sweet so#hes*#OH AND HES IRAQI TOO I LEGIT COULDNT BELIEVE THAT#dora daily#lowkey kinda sorta sad that a whole anon was more concerned than ppl i knew and who knew my age#and freely saw it happen so readily#and everyone else on that blog#genuinely and utterly disappointed#it’s always protect minors until the minors need protecting goddamn#this is especially directed at rhy yeah I’m not censoring that#🤷♀️#too busy simping over minor characters who don’t have a time skip in canon and aging them up then complaining about it when ppl call out#the brain deadery of that behaviour#girl pls#you did not care about minors from the beginning literally bye#e[redacted] literally ruined my brain chemistry to say the least I will never go into how what she did absolutely muddled my brain never#told anyone and I don’t think I can ever tell someone ever#not to mention practically hyperventilating being unable to breath literally going into madness and ppl think that I’m overreacting and#telling me to shut up about it and blaming me for the situation as if I wanted any of this#lmaolmaolmao#all that and I was expected to do uni girl byeeee I need a good century to recover at least ☠️#the only thing I DID want is friends but clearly that was a hard ask when ppl can get friends just by existing on this god forsaken app#atp I don’t even know what to say literally just wth#yall say mdni with your dumbass banners and decorate it like something special when yall are the ones to keep from minors you disgusting#wastes of clean oxygen 😭 mdni my foot gross ass adults should’ve never trusted them#the way I’d give them therapy to their complex traumas ☠️ imagine relying on a minor for therapy
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sometimes I think about how many people (mostly "friends") on the internet have blocked me after an argument/disagreement just because I tried to have clear/open communication with them and they refused to. or they "hint" at things and get mad if I ask or bring it up. they act like simply talking is an attack on them and want ignore the problem that clearly wont go away by pushing it under a rug. I can't stand people like this, honestly. they make me so angry and need to stop hurting people and way.
#its the people that think running away from problems and ignoring things will make it go away and refuse to own up to mistakes#or fix problems before theh get worse. then when they worse they blame you for it and act innocent then block you#all because you care about them and the friendship enough to want to fix the problem so it stops coming back and ruins things#these type of people are ridiculous and one of the biggest causes of my trauma#yeah i get maybe they have their reasons and i should be empathetic or something. but its a huge trigger#and they literally traumatize me with that bullshit!!!! so its hard to be understanding and not hate them for it!!!!#sighs. learn how to face problems and not run away and make things worse for everyone else because you only care about your own feelings#lee rants#i know saying this will offend people who do this. but getting hurt by these people when all i want is to fix simple issues feels worse so🤷#I haven't spent my whole life agonizing over trying to learn how to communicate and be understood just for them to take all my hard work and#step all over it and ignore it because they don't like having clear communication and expect me to be a mind reader or something
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How am I supposed to go from being ridiculed and judged for asking for help with my assignments/lessons in primary school to casually asking for help in college?? Am I supposed to act like my teachers and classmates didn’t screw me up in the head or
#college things#primary school things#no seriously#we were getting screamed at and made teachers disappointed if we did so much as ask for a simpler explanation or a repeat#and you expect me to casually ask my professors questions about my assignments???#emailing them is out of the question#they're gonna think I'm an idiot#which I am but no one needs to know that#it's so humiliating#shoutout to all the teachers and classmates who made me feel like a failure for not understanding everything right away#school trauma#I literally struggled to post ANONYMOUSLY on a discussion board once because I felt so stupid for asking a question#it doesn't help that I'm neurodivergent#and have a math disability#like it got so bad to the point where I was offended by people offering me help#because I was being indirectly told that needing help with your education is bad and that I should be ashamed#not to mention having the determine which classmates are nice and which ones will ruin your image if you ask for help#part of why I prefer working alone because I can't deal with that embarrassment#also yes this post helped me realize that school did in fact traumatize me in at least one way
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What I am gonna talk about is why that makes me fine with the way the teens handle their relationships with their parents.
Essentially the general avoidance almost all of them have. Linc basically ignoring his dad the last time they saw each other, Normal in general seems to be so angry at Sparrow (probably Lark to, but again that’s a different post), Scary just straight up denying that Terry is anything to her and siding with Willy, and just the way Taylor interacts with Nick.
It feels like we are getting this twisted version of the perspectives of the kiddads childhoods, Normals rage at Sparrow/Larks rage at Henry, Terrys denial of Ron/Scary’s denial of Terry, Grant blocking off his feeling from darrly/Linc blocking his feelings from grant, Glenn ignoring some obvious pains Nick may have/ Nick ignoring some obvious pains that Taylor may have.
The difference is solely in the motivations behind why each kid acts this way, and in the case of all of them. Their direct attempts to prevent what happened to them happening to their children, failed. I would love to see the kiddads come in and just magically fix their own mindsets and then their children’s issues, but from a place in the narrative I only think Terry and Grant is even slightly capable of doing that. And even then I can make arguments that they very much aren’t. The sad thing about that is that they may never be, especially in the case of both Nick and Lark.
Basically, Right now the teens are able to have much more independence from their parents , unlike the kids in season 1 (who were NPCs). That independence what I think is crucial to working on each of the kids relationship, but can also be the thing that completely breaks it.
#dungeons and daddies#dndads#dndaddies#I could have gone longer#but I didn’t feel like it#cause I like eggs#i want to make a post relating to how sparrow may be freaking out#due to the connection of Lark hating Henry#like part of me expected when Normal said I hate you dad in the staircase for him to freak#but the line he gives also screams denial#and his weird condescension#also just in general I don’t think either Lincoln or scary would benefit from a scene with their parent currently#I love the kiddads so I would never complain#Nick is very much just in the vein of projecting his trauma onto his kid as a way to protect him#like I know they have the explanation of hell ruining your morals#but part of me interprets everything bad Nick says as a direct response to the kiddads betrayal#also I am a firm beliver that Lark isn’t normals dad#hero’s maybe#probably not Normal
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i'm in the middle of watching the mdzs donghua and literally had to stop cause it's making me too depressed and heartbroken...
#i didn't expect that level of gay to trauma ratio???#how have i already gotten so much trauma before even getting to any of the gay??#don't get me wrong i'll continue watching it tomorrow#i won't stop just cause it's ruining my life#tgcf didn't prepare me for this#at least they gave us gay first and then the trauma dump#all the trauma was always accompanied by some cute and sweet hualian moments afterwards#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#mo dao zu shi#mdzs#hualianjpeg
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you show me a tarot card at this point and i WILL go ‘oh like [revue starlight character]!’ they should never have done this to me
#revstar#arcana arcadia ruined my life some may say it ruins my life to this day#i am thinking about it always always. revstar in general i am always thinking about.#if i posted as much abt revstar as i think. well you would all know everything about stella and shiro#(threat)#let me tell you more about how they (in a franchise where it’s directly stated that the characters are trading their youths for theater) are#the ones who have lost their youths the most tragically because they never had a choice.#and have never really been friends as equals but are probably still the closer to each other than anyone else.#not even about aa . this is just .#like let me tell you about this shot where everyone else is interacting with stella as friends#and shiro just has#her hands behind her back. let me tell you about -#and i’m STILL a seisho girl at heart they’ve just been on the mind#like DUUUDE we haven’t even seen who shiro really is without all the BULLSHIT on her shoulders just little glimpses… SHES ONLY 14..#and stella. well she is haunted by trauma apparitions very literally. and this is only AFTER the expectations of her family cause her to hav#an onstage breakdown and consider herself a failure#and her family have literally basically called her a disappointment iirc??????? get her OUT OF THERE!!!!!!#could talk about the symbolism with all of the second wave siegfeld characters for HOURS#they’re based on extinct animals that’s literally the thing i’m autistic about#ranting in tags so no one has to wade through all the posts i want to make#so funny this post is abt as and i didn’t even talk abt it… i promise i have just as many thoughts about it
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#tw for trauma and SA. sorry. im just not doing okay.#my SA was literally the worst thing to ever fucking happen to me and everybody expects me to just be able to 'move on'#like I'm trying but it kinda fucked up my mental health#every single thing about me is different now. i am a completely different person now.#it shattered and changed and ruined every single part of who i am as a person#but yeah sure I'll just move on bc it upsets other people to see me being upset#im trying to cope but i feel like a stranger to myself#and I'm struggling#and everyone's all uwu support trauma survivors until you're a survivor that's hypersexual and does drugs and sh and has trust issues#then it's like ooo spookyyyy
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Staying out of tales of arise Anything bc I think I do want to experience this game organically bc those plot twists hit me like a fucking TRUCK.
I did look up an estimate for how long the game is tho. I'm at like 30 ish hours and if you focus on plot alone it's like some 40 hours. But I have been doing side quests lol so it probably isn't even 10 hours remaining.
A Little scared of how things will be after this point tho. The Vibes will definitely have changed. And oh God I just want to hold Alphen so tightly. He doesn't deserve this.
#speculation nation#tfw ur amnesia was a blessing but now you remember and suddenly you have to deal with Extreme Trauma#and he was already traumatized!!!! he was already traumatized and now hes even more traumatized!!!!!!#but let's be real this group is made entirely up of very traumatized people lol. such is the way of this world.#this game is so fucking brutal tho. like im used to tales games hitting much harder than you expect#but they went out of their WAY to make this one really fuck you up#im absolutely in love with this game. but WOW it is not for the faint of heart lmfao#which sure is something to say about a very anime looking game where you can go to the Owl World and the Owl King will give you outfits#and you can wear ridiculous accessories even during serious cutscenes (a tales game Classic)#and also you own a ranch.#i still cant wrap my head around that one hfkshfj like what do you MEAN i own a ranch?!?! and then i just Kill the animals?!?!?#like ya food meats but i thought raising chickens would give me eggs. me cooing at my grown chickens then going into the menu#and it's like 'your chickens have reached maturity! items received: Chicken Meat" and i was just like. 'O-oh.'#and then the chickens were GOOOONE but at least the cats and dogs stay around without me EATING them#i. prefer to not visit my ranch. i dont want to be reminded that all these animals are gonna die.#hfkshfjd and YEA ALL THIS alongside some stunning displays of moral ambiguity#& the utter horror and injustice of 300 years of subjugation#perfectly captured right down to the erasure of culture. these people having to look to ruins to get in touch with their culture#bc it was Taken from them.#just. it's a ridiculously over the top anime game just like any tales game but wow. wowowowwow#and im saying this after playing tales of xillia 2. aka still the only game that made me cry Twice.#arise is truly an astounding game. it's very definitely in the running for my favorite tales game.#we'll see how the ending goes lol but given everything ive seen so far. it is Likely to be just as stunning hdkshfj#raving about this game when i should be going to sleep. man . man. ..
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Wriothesley's "then terrify me." line really got me. like oh oh sir-
He has no right to be so hot when he's angry (actually he does but still)
#he isn't a character i expected to like so much#and i was right his ass is so big because it's filled with trauma#i'm not sure he quite fits in my normal categories for men i like#i want to shove him when he makes me flustered in the beginning#i would actually call him sir if he asked#do you think he'd want to be called “your grace” in the bedroom or is that too much of a work thing for him...#might be too pretentious#also can i stop falling for cryo men? my team comp will be ruined otherwise
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#why do they always have to ruin my life#my fucking dad has to stay with me. i hate him so much. I HATE HIM SO MUCH.#now he has to live with me in my tiny apartment and my four cats. i have to shop for him.#i have to buy him food#i have to run errands for him#i have to listen to him berrate and belittile me#why am I getting punished for this???#I was so happy to finally get out of there#away from them. from all of them.#and now my dad has to live with me because he fucked up and moved in with his shitty gf who left him a month lster#hes going to expect everything from me and I can barely keep myself together every day#I lived with him once#i hated every single day#i hate this#i want to just disappear#i want to stop living#its already so hard trying to undo the trauma they put me through#and now Im getting my safe space#my home my place to just BE taken away from me for who knows how long#and i cant say no#all the older adults can say no but I have no choice because im 'the child'#i literally want to just run away from everything or just die#what was the point of trying to get better and live if all I want to do is die more#what was the point#WHAT WAS THE POINT OF ANYTHING IVE DONE#i want to die
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I absolutely adore the fic you just put out with Rafe! Hit me deep as someone that has been cheated on. You have a talent! <3 Rafe request idea! It just hit me, but I bought a sweater today from the Mens section at a store (better quality). Maybe you could do Reader and Rafe dating. He is falling hard and is super infatuated with her, one day she forgets that certain sweater at his place (which clearly on the label is for men from a mens store) and he is absolutely heartbroken thinking that she is cheating on him. Maybe he snaps, but more so in a super heartbroken, teary eyed and soul crushing way, lots of angst since you are so good at it!!!!
SWEATER WEATHER! ⸻ rafe cameron
notes / tysm for the request!! i loved writing this. may have gone overboard and made it a bit too dramatic but we love us some angst in this household !
content / rafe cameron x fem!reader, bf!rafe, angst, rafe with trauma, established relationship, accusations of cheating, comfort, 1.1k words
summary / when rafe finds out that your sweater is from the men’s section he immediately freaks. His deep rooted trauma and pain come to the surface and the fear of losing you almost ruins everything.
You loved oversized sweaters. There was something about the way they swallowed you up in warmth, like a cozy hug you could wear. So when you wandered into the menswear section one afternoon and spotted the perfect oversized sweater—super soft, way too big, and in a deep charcoal gray—you couldn't resist. It was perfect for cool evenings with Rafe, wrapped up on his couch while you two watched a movie or just talked about nothing.
You bought it on impulse, smiling to yourself as you imagined Rafe teasing you about how it was big enough to fit him. You wore it the next time you visited him, not really going into detail as you were too caught up with other things, feeling completely at ease in his presence.
Rafe was everything you wanted—strong, confident, but sweet in a way you hadn't expected when you first met him. He made you laugh with his gruff exterior and soft heart. He made you feel safe, loved.
While Rafe, for his part, was falling deeper and deeper in love with you every day. He'd catch glimpses of you in moments you didn't even realize he was watching—laughing softly to yourself at a text, tucking your hair behind your ear, or wrapping yourself in one of those oversized sweaters like you were wrapping yourself in comfort. You were everything good in his world, and he'd do anything to keep you close.
So that evening, like so many others, you two stayed up late, talking until you finally kissed him goodnight and left for home, too tired to remember to grab the sweater you'd draped over his chair.
Rafe found it the next morning, tossed casually over the back of his chair, and at first, he smiled. It still smelled like you—vanilla and something sweet, something comforting.
Then he saw the label.
Men's store. Size large.
The words hit him like a freight train. He knew you loved oversized sweaters, but this... this wasn't just big. It was from a men's section, clearly not something meant for you, at least not at first. His heart started to pound, thoughts spinning out of control. Who had you gotten this from? Who were you spending time with when he wasn't around?
He tried to push the thoughts away, but they clung to him like poison. He could see it in his mind—you smiling at someone else, laughing, falling into someone else's arms, and it tore at him. The image of you, with your oversized sweater, now felt like a lie, like everything he thought you two had built was a fragile illusion.
So when you came back over the next day, something was off. The moment you stepped through the door, you could feel the tension in the air. Rafe was a mess of nerves and heartbreak. He tried to keep it together, but the moment he saw you, something inside him broke. The sweater was still in his hand, crumpled and worn, and without thinking, he thrust it towards you.
"Who is he?" he choked out, his voice raw, filled with emotion he could no longer control.
You stared at him, confusion flooding your eyes. "What? Rafe, what are you talking about?"
"This. It's not yours. It's from a men's store. You left it here, and now I can't stop thinking... you're seeing someone else, aren't you? Someone gave you this."
For a moment, you couldn't speak. You could only stare at him, confusion giving way to a horrible realization. He thought you were cheating on him. Your heart sank, seeing how much pain he was in, how deeply he was hurt by something that wasn't even real.
"Rafe," you whispered, reaching out to him, but he pulled back, his face crumbling with heartbreak.
"Don't lie to me, y/n," he said, his voice breaking. "I can't handle it if you lie to me."
Tears brimmed in his eyes, and you felt your own chest tighten at the sight of him like this—so vulnerable, so broken by his own fears. You hadn't realized how much you meant to him until now, seeing him unravel over something as small as a sweater.
"Rafe, it's my sweater," you said gently, voice steady despite the ache in your own heart. "I bought it from the men's section. I liked how big it was, that's all. No one gave it to me. I promise. I would never do that to you."
But Rafe couldn't bring himself to believe you. Not yet. His mind was trapped in the fear of losing you, of being second in your heart to someone else. Like it was with his dad and Sarah. The tears fell then, and he couldn't stop them, his chest heaving with the weight of his own insecurities.
Without hesitation, you stepped closer, wrapping your arms around him despite his resistance. He was stiff at first, but you didn't let go. "I'm not going anywhere," you whispered, voice soft but firm as you rested your head against his chest. "It's just a sweater, Rafe. You're the only one I want."
He stood there, frozen in your embrace, and slowly, painfully, the truth began to sink in. You weren't lying. The sweater wasn't a sign of betrayal, just a silly, oversized piece of clothing you liked. And he had let his fears nearly destroy what you two had.
Slowly, his body began to relax in your arms, his breath ragged as he fought to hold back the tears. His arms came up to wrap around you, and you could feel the weight of his emotions in the way he held you, like he was afraid you might slip away.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice thick with regret, his face buried in your hair. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to—"
You pulled back just enough to look up at him, eyes soft and full of understanding. "It's okay," you said quietly, brushing a tear from his cheek. "We're okay, Rafe."
He nodded, his eyes searching yours for reassurance, for any sign that what you two had wasn't slipping through his fingers. You could see the fear there, the way he'd built you up in his mind as something precious, something fragile, and how easily that fear had spiraled into heartbreak.
"We're okay," you repeated, holding him close, letting him feel your warmth, your presence, until the weight of his fears finally began to lift.
And for the first time since he'd found that sweater, Rafe allowed himself to believe you. He needed to trust you, to get over the fear of being abandoned. And deep down he knew that you could be the one to take his pain away.
feedback and requests are greatly appreciated !!
tags 🏷️ @starkeysprincess @gibson-g1rl @beausling @drewsarms @nxptvn @rafescokewhore
#writers on tumblr#drabble#rafe cameron x you#rafe obx#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe x you#rafe fic#rafe x reader#rafe outer banks#rafe obx 4#request#requested
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