#i think it actually does show changes/development in ford as a person

[twoa-plus]

dissecting stanford pines and finding organs that don’t exist but like in a metaphorical way

that’s it that’s the title i’m going with. this is a long one folks o7

most of this isn’t sourced or canon at all it’s just personal interpretation/headcanon/whatever else u wanna call it, but!! since more people are seeing my deranged gravity falls ramblings now i figure i should probably give some perspective as to why i like/defend ford as much as i do

(in my other gf posts i do try to stick to canon to back up whatever point i’m making - this is just about my personal opinion of ford as a character, and should be able to be thrown out in regards to my other posts)

so for some background/setup/whatever (it’s important i promise bear with me), different people have different instinctual responses to anxiety/stress. i come from a family (genetics are fun) where the default response is to start (metaphorically ofc) biting and hissing like a cornered animal. this doesn’t necessarily mean there’s any actual hatred or malice or anything towards the people that end up getting scratched - they might just be at the wrong place at the wrong time, they might’ve done something super minor and insignificant that added on to a preexisting pile of stress, etc etc

i cannot stress enough that i am not saying this is ok. you dont need me to tell you that hurting people who don’t deserve it is a bad thing, lol. what i am saying though is that sometimes people can kind of suck for reasons other than just genuinely wanting everyone around them to be miserable

this is the last “background” part i swear BUT another thing thats less genetic and more just me being weird is that i’m the type of person where like. any minor environmental change can really stress me out lol. like even just reorganizing my desk can be pretty emotionally taxing

SO. finally back on topic. stanford pines. i see a lot of the behavior/patterns i just described in him. like i’ve spent my entire life around people like this, and while i understand why a lot of people see him as just some asshole, i can’t help but see him as a guy who’s just kinda going through it lol

just talking about the more recent events as of the series, he’s just spent 30 years god knows where doing and seeing god knows what, he has an abusive ex who wants to murder him and his entire family (plus the whole dimension, really), and in the three decades he’s been gone the entire world - including his own house - has changed and left him behind. add onto that that he went missing in 1982, way before we had all of the emotional/mental health resources we have now, we all saw what the stans’ childhood was like, and that ford is terrible with people - including, imo, himself. if there’s anybody out there who would have Feelings and not understand what they are or where they’re coming from or what to do about them, it’s this guy

this entire setup is the perfect circumstance for fear and anxiety and stress and uncertainty to all get translated into anger. a really big example of this, to me, is how he talks about dipper in journal 3. i’ve talked about this before somewhere so i’ll try to summarize as fast as i can lol

reading his initial entry about dipper would make u think he like. hates this kid lol. but i really don’t think he ever did - he was really excited to meet the kids in the show and already seemed to care about them just by virtue of existing, and his opinion on dipper in journal 3 seems to do a complete 180 pretty quickly which ,,, doesn’t really fit ford as a character. like i love the man but that guy can hold a GRUDGE

here’s how it reads to me:

ford gets back to his home dimension after 30 years and everything is different

he’s subconsciously kind of struggling with the fact that he doesn’t really have a “home” anymore - the sense of familiarity and comfort that would normally come with the word is gone. (i specify that it’s subconscious because, like i said earlier, i do not get the vibe that he’s particularly aware of his own emotions)

he finds out that journal 3 - something he made with his own two hands and considers part of his life’s work - has also changed in the decades he’s been gone. this adds to the feeling of unfamiliarity with the world around him

it’s easier to blame that “final straw” and say that he’s just upset about his work being tampered with rather than address the actual root of the problem, so that’s exactly what he does. this still doesn’t mean that there’s any genuine hatred towards dipper. anger in the moment, yeah, but not hatred

again, this is entirely personal interpretation, and i completely understand if u don’t see it like this!! this is just a pattern of thoughts/behavior that i’m very familiar with, so it’s easy for me to apply it to situations like this even if it’s not really part of the canon

i also think there’s a big problem in this fandom with just ,, not seeing ford as a Person with Emotions? idk how to explain it but it feels like people expect him to always know exactly what to do in every situation just bc he’s old and academically smart. like whenever another character does something objectively bad it’s “well there were extenuating circumstances,” (which is usually true and i agree !!) but ford never really seems to get that treatment. if he does something bad it’s just because he sucks

a big example of this i think is the fight between him and stan (y’know the “you ruined my life”/“you ruined your own life”). you cannot look me dead in the eyes and, in full seriousness, with the context of everything ford was going through with bill at the time, say that he was fully mentally/emotionally stable during that conversation. “oh so you’re blaming stan-“ NO!!! stan was also going through it!!! that’s the entire point - they’re both people with their own lives and emotions and everything else that comes with that, they had very human reactions to their respective situations, and they both ended up hurt!! hopefully i’m explaining this right but i just don’t like it when people pin everything on ford, like there was a lot going on and at the end of the day he’s just a human

wasn’t really sure how to work this in so i’ll just put it here - i don’t think ford ever truly hated stan, either. familial bonds are complicated, and there can be a whole lot of anger towards someone without true hatred being present. i briefly mentioned the stans’ childhood sucking earlier, and i don’t just mean stanley - it’s easier to pinpoint him as a victim of abuse/neglect, but that doesn’t mean ford had it great either. their parents (specifically filbrick, but caryn didn’t exactly do a fantastic job with them either) expected nothing of stan and the world of ford, both of which would weigh heavily on any child. plus, ford being the favorite doesn’t mean all of his emotional needs were met - filbrick seeing him as an opportunity to make money doesn’t mean he was suddenly an emotionally present and caring father towards him. WCT wasn’t just an opportunity for ford to go be a famous scientist or whatever - it was a chance for his father to love him, something both of the stans desperately wanted. (WCT was also on the opposite side of the country from where they lived but i’m sure that’s completely unrelated !!!)

do i think stan deserved anything that happened to him after the science fair incident? no, absolutely not, he was a child. do i think it was right of ford to just stand there as his brother got thrown out? no, absolutely not - but he was a child too. as for them not speaking for a decade after that, like i mentioned earlier ford can hold a grudge like no other. (this doesn’t just apply to stan, either, ford dedicated half of his life to trying to kill his ex lmao.) i think ford’s ability to hold on to anger like that is actually a pretty major part of/flaw in his personality, but again, anger - even the strongest, most long-lived of it - is not synonymous with hatred. stan, who ford has always gone to for help when he truly needed it, it not what ford’s hatred looks like. bill, who ford actively wants to die, is

anyways!! i never know how to close these things lol. ig in summary i just see ford’s behavior (in the show at least) as more of a sign of internal struggle rather than like ,, genuinely hating the people around him and wanting their lives to suck. did/does he have an ego problem? absolutely. is he incapable of love and human connection? no. is he immune to manipulation/abuse/neglect/etc and everything that comes with that? also no

he’s an interdimensional criminal why can’t he go to the theraprism. i think he should

[britishsass]

Bob's Mind

I think an important thing to discuss in Psychonauts is the idea that a mind can and will change. In-game, we've only seen the situation where that happens under outside inference (Loboto's Mind in RoR vs. Loboto's Labyrinth in PN2 [Sasha's mental construct], Hollis's Classroom vs Hollis's Hot Streak [Raz's mental connection], Ford's Follicles vs. Cruller's Correspondance vs. Strike City vs. Tomb of the Sharkophagus [Ford's use of the Astralathe]) but I would like to imagine that they do, in fact, change with time, as everyone does change a lot through their life.

So therefore, here's an idea list for how Bob's mind in specific changes throughout the timeline of Psychonauts. I will add, a lot of this is headcanon (up to when the others in the 7 appear) and it is entirely my own opinion.

YOUNG BOB (Pre-father leaving)

My personal headcanon is that he and his father were very close, and I think that they used to go fishing together, leading Bob to have a deep love for the sea. This inspires what his mind is like:

An ocean world, just like in Bob's Bottles.

There's a large ship, but it sails on its own wherever he wants it to go.

The world is open to be explored, and stories of treasure, pirates, and jungles inspire the islands he traverses. It's new every time.

The world is his oyster, and it's a welcoming place for him, with people and plants always willing to talk to him. It's like a storybook come to life.

This world is a welcoming place at this point. Still open to him to look around.

YOUNG BOB (Post-father's death)

This is the point where his world changes drastically for the first time. This being his first experience with major loss, it definitely changes how the world feels.

The world is still an ocean, still with a ship, but it's become stormier.

It's less welcoming now, the danger more prominent. Since I think his father was in the Navy and died, he no longer sails as much.

There are memories of the things that they were given upon his father's death. The hat he wore, the picture, the apologies.

Flowers become more common. Especially the ones focused on grief, the bouquets at the funeral and viewing.

The main island is larger, but the rest of the world is less visited, more dangerous.

BOB ZANOTTO (Pre-Tia's death)

This is when he's mostly forgotten his father. Things are a little bit weird for him, since Tia's drinking in the greenhouse and he's trying to take care of things.

After a while, his development adds more to the main island, taking away from the other islands.

The town and farmer's market appear. There's a guitar hall in the market. It feels so alive, so welcoming.

The ocean is calmer, more welcoming. The ship is now only a small boat.

There's a lot more flowers, as he works with them more. Flowers to represent those from the market, and an actual figure for his mom.

He plays guitar a lot for the people there. It's a fun thing for him.

BOB ZANOTTO (Post-Tia's death)

And yet again, tragedy strikes. He gives up his hobby of guitar, falling into the same cycle Tia was in. He accidentally breaks down under the amount of well-wishing he receives, causing a massive amount of vines and such to break through the market, and decides that all he can do is hide in the greenhouse.

The main island falls into disarray, splitting into lots of smaller islands as he hides away.

The sea is now more littered with bottles, messages of words he wishes he'd said.

The plants and flowers are everywhere, choking out any attempts at other things.

The boat breaks, leaving wreckage on the shore.

The guitar hall becomes merely a broken shell of a place, eventually becoming part of Otto's island in canon.

Bottles appear.

This would be how it would appear the first time he meets Ford, as I tried to show in Zinnias for the Zanottos.

-> "Inside the man's head was an ocean. A tiny island. A boat that had crashed years ago. There were images floating through the waves, a woman and a child and a guitar, a smile or a wave or a plant, a million moths and the flames that lapped at them."

BOB (Pre-Helmut's "death")

This is the cute bit! The part where he lets himself open up to the others and falls in love!

The main island is rebuilt to be an outdoor garden.

The greenhouse appears on another island.

The bottles fade a lot, but there are still a few, including one that holds a grave for Tia.

Bridges are built between the islands, making it very open and easy to travel.

The boat is rebuilt, but it's messy and small. He and Lucy go out fishing in the real world, and it slowly becomes an actual boat for that.

The Feel Mobile appears.

This would be the timespan I was referencing in Cold Hands, Warm Hearts.

->"His mind was an ocean of sight and sound, an archipelago of thoughts and memories. Bridges connected them over rivulets and streams, keeping feet dry as they passed over the sand and the grass, leading them to the places he frequented. That greenhouse was still there."

BOB (Post-Helmut's "death")

This is when it returns to being a storm. It's not a good time for him.

The bridges crumble.

The main island starts to fall into disarray, leaving Bob with barren pots.

Bottles grow more frequent.

The three main bottles become a major feature. There is no way to reach them in the storm, no way to get anywhere.

This is the timespan I mentioned in Bottled Up.

->"The garden around him knew his sorrow, and the plants shriveled under the weight, dying just as his heart did. Even his tears weren’t enough to water them, and the river only grew stronger, cutting the island in half, leaving him with nothing but the memories of what had been there. Another bottle drifted past, and he brought it closer, finding the seed inside."

BOB (Psychonauts 2)

That's just Bob's Bottles. Genuinely, just Bob's Bottles.

BOB (Post-Psychonauts 2)

The one I'll talk about here is specifically one year after the game, when Helmut's back and Bob is sober and healing.

The bridges are new and made of rope and logs.

The bottles are gone, scrubbed out.

There's new life breathed into everywhere-- no more bulbs, the moth is stuck in a cage. Bioluminescence is the name of the game here!

I'm actually writing a story taking place in this mindscape right now, though, so you won't get much of anything out of me for it right now ;)

[bloodbenderz]

humaniterations (dot) net/2014/10/13/an-anarchist-perspective-on-the-red-lotus/ this article from oct 2014 is very dense — truly, a lot to unpack here, but I feel like you would find this piece interesting. I would love it if you shared your thoughts on the points that stood out to you, whether you agree or disagree. you obv don’t have to respond to it tho, but I’m sending it as an ask jic you feel like penning (and sharing) a magnificent essay, as is your wont 💕

article

i know this took me forever 2 answer SORRY but i just checked off all the things on my to do list for the first time in days today so. Essay incoming ladies!

ok im SO glad u sent me this bc it’s so so good. it’s a genuinely thoughtful criticism of the politics in legend of korra (altho i think its sometimes a little mean to korra unnecessarily like there’s no reason to call her a “petulant brat” or say that she throws tantrums but i do understand their point about her being an immature and reactionary hero, which i’ll get back to) and i think the author has a good balance between acknowledging like Yeah the lok writers were american liberals and wrote their show accordingly and Also writing a thorough analysis of lok’s politics that felt relevant and interesting without throwing their hands up and saying this is all useless liberal bullshit (which i will admit that i tend to do).

this article essentially argues that the red lotus antagonists of s3 were right. And that’s not an uncommon opinion i think but this gives it serious weight. Like, everything that zaheer’s gang did was, in context, fully understandable. of course the red lotus would be invested in making sure that the physically and spiritually and politically most powerful person in the world ISNT raised by world leaders and a secret society of elites that’s completely unaccountable to the people! of course the red lotus wants to bring down tyrannical governments and allow communities to form and self govern organically! and the writers dismiss all of that out of hand by 1. consistently framing the red lotus as insane and murderous (korra never actually gives zaheer’s ideas a chance or truly considers integrating them into her own approach) 2. representing the death of the earth queen as not just something that’s not necessarily popular (what was with mako’s bootlicker grandma, i’d love to know) but as something that causes unbelievable violence and chaos in ba sing se (which, like, a lot of history and research will tell you that people in disasters tend towards prosocial behaviors). so the way the story frames each of these characters and ideologies is fascinating because like. if you wanted to write season 3 of legend of korra with zaheer as the protagonist and korra as the antagonist, you wouldn’t actually have to change the sequence of events at all, really. these writers in particular and liberal writers in general LOVE writing morally-gray-but-ultimately-sympathetic characters (like, almost EVERY SINGLE fire nation character in the first series, who were full on violent colonizers but all to a degree were rehabilitated in the eyes of the viewer) but instead of framing the red lotus as good people who are devoted to justice and freedom and sometimes behave cruelly to get where theyre trying to go, they frame them as psychopaths and murderers who have good intentions don’t really understand how to make the world a better place.

and the interesting thing about all this, about the fact that the red lotus acted in most cases exactly as it should have in context and the only reason its relegated to villain status is bc the show is written by liberals, is that the red lotus actually points out really glaring sociopolitical issues in universe! like, watching the show, u think well why the fuck HASN’T korra done anything about the earth queen oppressing her subjects? why DOESN’T korra do anything about the worse than useless republic president? why the hell are so many people living in poverty while our mains live cushy well fed lives? how come earth kingdom land only seems to belong to various monarchs and settler colonists, instead of the people who are actually indigenous to it? the show does not want to answer these questions, because american liberal capitalism literally survives on the reality of oppressive governments and worse than useless presidents and people living in poverty while the middle/upper class eats and indigenous land being stolen. if the show were to answer these questions honestly, the answer would be that the status quo in real life (and the one on the show that mirrors real life) Has To Change.

So they avoid answering these questions honestly in order for the thesis statement to be that the status quo is good. and the only way for the show to escape answering these questions is for them to individualize all these broad social problems down into Good people and Bad people. so while we have obvious bad ones like the earth queen we also have all these capitalists and monarchs and politicians who are actually very nice and lovely people who would never hurt anyone! which is just such an absurd take and it’s liberal propaganda at its best. holding a position of incredible political/economic power in an unjust society is inherently unethical and maintaining that position of power requires violence against the people you have power over. which is literally social justice 101. but there’s literally no normal, average, not-politically-powerful person on the show. so when leftist anarchism is presented and says that destroying systems that enforce extreme power differentials is the only way to bring peace and freedom to all, the show has already set us up to think, hey, fuck you, top cop lin beifong and ford motor ceo asami sato are good people and good people like them exist! and all we have to do to move forward and progress as a society is to make sure we have enough good individuals in enough powerful positions (like zuko as the fire lord ending the war, or wu as the earth king ending the monarchy)! which is of course complete fiction. liberal reform doesn’t work. but by pretending that it could work by saying that the SYSTEM isnt rotten it’s just that the people running it suck and we just need to replace those people, it automatically delegitimizes any radical movements that actually seek to change things.

and that’s the most interesting thing about this article to me is that it posits that the avatar...might actually be a negative presence in the world. the avatar is the exact same thing: it’s a position of immense political and physical power bestowed completely randomly, and depending on the moral character and various actions of who fills that position at any given time, millions of people will or won’t suffer. like kyoshi, who created the fascist dai li, like roku, who refused to remove a genocidal dictator from power, like aang, who facilitated the establishment of a settler colonial state on earth kingdom land. like korra! she’s an incredibly immature avatar and a generally reactionary lead. i’ve talked about this at length before but she never actually gets in touch with the needs of the people. she’s constantly running in elite circles, exposed only to the needs and squabbles of the upper class! how the hell is she supposed to understand the complexities of oppression and privilege when she was raised by a chess club with inordinate amounts of power and associates almost exclusively with politicians and billionaires?? from day 1 we see that she tends to see things in very black and white ways which is FINE if you’re a privileged 17 yr old girl seeing the world for the first time but NOT FINE if you’re the single most powerful person in the world! Yeah, korra thinks the world is probably mostly fine and just needs a little whipping into shape every couple years, because all she has ever known is a mostly fine world! in s1 when mako mentions that he as a homeless impoverished teenager worked for a gang (which is. Not weird. Impoverished people of every background are ALWAYS more likely to resort to socially unacceptable ways of making money) korra is like “you guys are criminals?????!!!!!” she was raised in perfect luxury by a conservative institution and just never developed beyond that. So sure, if the red lotus raised her anarchist, probably a lot would’ve been different/better, but....they didn’t. and korra ended up being a reactionary and conservative avatar who protected monarchs and colonialist politicians. The avatar as a position is completely subject to the whims of whoever is currently the avatar. and not only does that suck for everyone who is not the avatar, not only is it totally unfair to whatever kid who grows up knowing the fate of the world is squarely on their shoulders, but it as a concept is a highly individualist product of the authors’ own western liberal ideas of progress! the idea that one good leader can fix the world (or should even try) based on their own inherent superiority to everyone else is unbelievably flawed and ignores the fact that all real progress is brought about as a result of COMMUNITY work, as a result of normal people working for themselves and their neighbors!

the broader analysis of bending was really interesting to me too, but im honestly not sure i Totally agree with it. the article pretty much accepts the show’s assertion that bending is a privilege (and frankly backs it up much better than the original show did, but whatever), and i don’t think that’s NECESSARILY untrue since it is, like, a physical advantage (the author compares it to, for example, the fact that some people are born athletically gifted and others are born with extreme physical limitations), but i DO think that it discounts the in universe racialization of bending. in any sequel to atla that made sense, bending as a race making fact would have been explored ALONGSIDE the physical advantages it bestows on people. colonialism and its aftermath is generally ignored in this article which is its major weakness i think, especially in conjunction with bending. you can bring up the ideas the author did about individual vs community oriented progress in the avatar universe while safely ignoring the colonialism, but you can’t not bring up race and colonialism when you discuss bending. especially once you get to thinking about how water/earth/airbenders were imprisoned and killed specifically because bending was a physical advantage, and that physical advantage was something that would have given colonized populations a means of resistance and that the fire nation wanted to keep to itself.

i think that’s the best lens thru which to analyze bending tbh! like in the avatar universe bending is a tool that different ethnic groups tend to use in different ways. at its best, bending actually doesn’t represent social power differences (despite representing a physical power difference) because it’s used to represent/maintain community solidarity. like, take the water tribe. katara being the last waterbender, in some way, makes her the last of a part of swt CULTURE. the implication is that when there were a lot of waterbenders in the south, they dedicated their talents to building community and helping their neighbors, because this was something incredibly culturally important and important to the water tribe as a community. the swt as a COLLECTIVE values bending for what it can do for the entire tribe, which counts for basically every other talent a person can have (strength, creativity, etc). the fire nation, by contrast, distorts the community value of bending by racializing it: anyone who bends an element that isn’t fire is inherently NOT fire nation (and therefore inherently inferior) and, because of the physical power that bending confers, anyone who bends an element that isn’t fire is a threat to fire nation hegemony. and in THAT framework of bending, it’s something that intrinsically assigns worth and reifies race in a way that’s conveniently beneficial to the oppressor.

it IS worth talking about how using Element as a way to categorize people reifies nations, borders, and race in a way that is VERY characteristic of white american liberals. i tried to be conscious of that (and the way that elements/bending can act in DIFFERENT ways, depending on cultural context) but i think it’s pretty clear that the writers did intend for element to unequivocally signify nation (and, by extension, race), which is part of why they screwed up mixed families so bad in lok. when they’ve locked themselves into this idea that element=nation=race, they end up with sets of siblings like mako and bolin or kya tenzin and bumi, who all “take” after only one parent based on the element that they bend. which is just completely stupid but very indicative of how the writers actually INTENDED element/bending to be a race making process. and its both fucked up and interesting that the writers display the same framework of race analysis that the canonical antagonists of atla do.

anyway that’s a few thoughts! thank u again for sending the article i really loved it and i had a lot of fun writing this <3

[bluepinetree]

I posted 413 times in 2021

9 posts created (2%)

404 posts reblogged (98%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 44.9 posts.

I added 1,143 tags in 2021

#gravity falls - 364 posts

#stanford pines - 206 posts

#fanart - 162 posts

#stanley pines - 155 posts

#lol - 50 posts

#fanfiction - 48 posts

#video - 45 posts

#mabel pines - 44 posts

#dipper pines - 37 posts

#headcanon - 32 posts

Longest Tag: 114 characters

#i am missing my copy of journal 3 and ive moved teice in three months and im scared i might have keft it somewhere

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Dimensional Parallel Theory

I’ve been thinking again, and my brain is going in circles over the concept introduced in Journal 3 where if two dimensional parallels make physical contact, they cause the collapse and demise of themselves and the dimension in which they exist.

On one hand, it explains a lot of Ford avoiding his other selves throughout the multiverse, fearing a recurrence of such an event, but on the other hand, we only have a single known incident of such an occurrence. A single known incident because the parameters to conduct an experiment to confirm the occurrence is not only unfeasible, but legitimately impossible to carry out without catastrophic consequences.

What if that incident was the exception to the norm? What if contact between parallels is not only feasible, but relatively common? After all, the multiverse is a vast and intricate network of multiple realities whose rules don’t always mesh with one another, and really the only truth of the multiverse is what you personally experience and that truth can change and develop over time. What if that incident occurred, not because it was a universal constant, but because it was a fear that the individuals involved in the incident believed to be a truth, and because they believed in that truth, it became a self fulfilling prophecy.

I cannot in good conscience believe that with all the multiverse realities that exist, parallels would not occasionally and unknowingly bump into each other and make physical contact. But because of that lack of knowledge, incidents fail to occur and dimensions go unscathed because the BELIEF of that occurrence is what caused it to happen, not a basal universal truth. Which again, universal truths are only as consistent as one can make them, and in the multiverse, literally ANYTHING is possible.

...look, I just want there to be a Ford Space like there’s a Mabel Dimension where scared and lost Fords can find comfort and companionship while traveling to find home OKAY?!

17 notes • Posted 2021-04-28 21:04:32 GMT

#4

People keep thanking me for starting the Round Robin that became the Knock Out AU and I never intended to start a thing, I just wrote a drabble and the fandom came together and I’m getting to write and chat with some of my author idols and I am going to goddang CRY from how happy I am with everything.

@verysorrytobother​ @roseverdict​ @mother-ofthe-universe​ @nelson-and-murdock​ @shipper-of-many-many-ships​ @presidentstalkeyes​ @detectivejigsawpines​ @leesbian42​ @ramblesanddragons​ and anyone else I can’t quite recall atm I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!

35 notes • Posted 2021-05-25 06:09:16 GMT

#3

The GF Round Robin Discord is going off on ideas of Multiverse Ford and his shenanigans.

Finger Dimension Hand Model Ford.

46 notes • Posted 2021-05-27 05:29:32 GMT

#2

Does anybody else have moments while perusing Journal 3 wishing there was an audiobook version with all the voice actors?

Cause I would totally be down for a Journal 3 audio book with JK Simmon, Jason Ritter and Kristen Schaal reading the various entries in character.

49 notes • Posted 2021-05-12 20:30:25 GMT

#1

Pines Family Musical Taste

So, I was listening to some of my older CDs on the way to work today, and I got to thinking-

People have lots of ideas and considerations of what the various Pines family members could be ASSOCIATED with musically, but what to they actually LIKE?

We do have some ideas given to us from the show- Mabel goes for rock ballads and boy bands, Dipper enjoys Icelandic pop music, Stan was pretty big into the dancing scene of the 70s. Ford? Not a dang clue, except for really not enjoying Fiddleford's banjo playing.

Did Stan go through a punk rock phase? Did he listen to the Beatles or Paul Simon? Ford, big nerd that he is, maybe went for the deeply nerdy filk music that became a big deal thanks to the fandom surrounding Star Trek.

Please reblog with your thoughts, cause I can't stop imagining Stan singing along to "Diamonds in the soles of her Shoes" and it is KILLING ME.

84 notes • Posted 2021-05-14 21:26:39 GMT

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[ladyloveandjustice]

The Westing Game Chapter 21

The Fourth Bomb

In a wacky misunderstanding, Theo thinks Alice is the bomber and tries to blackmail her with the info so he can borrow her bike (Yes, really. Go big or go home is Theo’s motto) but of course Alice thinks he means he knows ANGELA is the bomber.

And in what might be the most touching moment in the book so far, Alice responds to this by setting off a bomb and writing a thing indicating that she is the bomber in order to throw all suspicion off Angela. She eve loses her trademark braid in the process.

It really is incredibly sweet. Alice is very caustic toward her sister, but this isn’t the first time she’s indicated she’s ride-or-die when it comes down to it (she got rid of the evidence for Angela and warned her not to say anything to the lawyer), and it’s also a very lovely response to Angela’s early sacrifice- where she took the bomb she made to her face rather than have it explode to her sisters. But while Angela’s sacrifice was spur-of-the-moment motivated by guilt and panic as well as love (not that it makes it less meaningful), Alice’s is one she planned out and considered. She had time to consider the consequences. She knew that Angela willingly put herself in this position. But she still chose to take the fall anyway, and set off a bomb after seeing what the same thing did to her sister’s face.

She already feels meaningless to her family in general, and maybe on the surface she feels her standing (with her mother in particular) can’t get any lower. “I’m already the troublemaker, I’m already the unwanted one, I have nothing to lose, but Angela would lose everything” was how she convinced herself. (in addition to being aware as a minor she wouldn’t be punished as harshly, smart girl that she is).

But it’s also clear that Alice DOES long for her mother’s love and approval, and I think she also had to contend with a deep fear that after this action, there’d be no going back for them, that she’d doomed herself to be the ‘bad one’ forever. Yet she still did it.

And the loss of her braid is of course, incredibly significant. Angela said earlier that the braid is her “crutch”- she bases a lot of her personality around it. It was her excuse to spend time with her mother and now her excuse to spend time with Flora, it’s the trademark thing people can pull on and she can then she gets excuse to kick them and get in fights and form connections, it’s how she gets attention and relationships for herself without exposing her own vulnerability. But she sacrificed what little that makes her stand out, what little social currency she has to protect the same sister who she envies for being in the spotlight- because that bond is more important than her jealousy and her need for attention. Just like her sister sacrificed one of the things that bring her adulation- her looks- to protect her. Love is more important than those petty things.

Alice is forced to talk to Judge Ford afterwards and, sharp as ever, Ford guesses that she’s protecting Angela.  This quote especially gets me:

The judge was astounded (…). Angela could not be the bomber, that sweet, pretty thing. Thing? Is that how she regarded the young woman, as a thing? And what had she ever said to her except “I hear you’re getting married, Angela” or “You’re so pretty, Angela”. Had anyone ever asked about her ideas, her hopes, her plans? If I had been treated like that, I’d have used dynamite, not fireworks; no, I would have just walked and kept on going. But Angela was different.

There’s a fascinating theme in this book about being marginalized, and the different ways these marginalized people both are pitted against each other and can overlook even each other while also finding connections and comradery with each other… I think I’ll have to wait until the end to fully get my thesis on the whole thing together, but I really find it interesting and appreciate it. Ford’s struggles as a black woman, Alice being overlooked for not performing femininity (thus envious of Angela despite knowing how shitty she has it), Angela being boxed because everyone wants to mold her as the perfect feminine ideal (thus feeling envious of Alice despite knowing how shitty she has it), Sun feeling out of place as a Chinese immigrant, Hoo knowing he’s looked down upon as a Chinese-American (yet still not considering the pain of his own wife), Chris struggling as a disabled kid, many people who are financially disadvantaged and/or feeling limited to the role of caretaker, Sydelle feeling overlooked in general and appropriating others’ struggles in her bizarre quest to get noticed- it’s all very interesting and pretty deftly handled, especially considering the time period the book was written in. 

And our antagonist is quintessential exploitative Rich White Man (obsessed with American Exceptionalism to boot), though it’s casually mentioned he’s the son of immigrants, an identity he seems to have actively shed, going so far as to change his name (if that’s why he changed it), so there’s even complexity there.

But the thing with Ford here is an interesting demonstration of that. Despite being smart and socially aware and having an even more fraught history of being dismissed and belittled, she didn’t give much thought to Angela and subconsciously went along with the same objectification everyone else does, putting her on a pedestal. (There’s a lot to be said about how Angela’s veneration and perceived “purity” by the others might interact with her whiteness, and how Ford realizing she bought into that narrative subconsciously might feel to her as a black woman, but I’m not really the person to discuss that. Anyway!)

The other important development here is that Alice also finally confesses that she saw Westing the night of his murder but mentions that the Westing she saw didn’t look dead, but asleep and like a wax dummy. This sets off alarm bells for both me and Ford.

So, I think its safe to say my earlier theory Sam Westing isn’t dead is probably true. What of the corpse that was present at the will-reading? I think people would have noticed it was a wax dummy, but a disguised corpse from his coroner friend still makes some sense. So where is Westing now? Considering Barney Northup doesn’t exist, could he be Barney?

But speaking of Westing, if we need further confirmation the man is the scum of the earth, he’s a union buster and he fired Sandy for trying to organize one in the paper plant.

We also learn Ford’s backstory with Westing at last: Her parents were household staff at Westing’s mansion and she grew up there as a result. She played chess with Westing frequently as a child, but not only would he brag and take pride in beating a goddamn pre-teen, he mocked her with racialized insults. She never won, but Westing ended up financing her education (that’s the ‘debt’ she owes him). She believes he did this to get a judge he could control, but has refused to play along, removing herself from any case involving him.

I can’t help but think Westing would have known Ford wouldn’t play ball, though. So he may have had another motive for sending her to school. It could be something even more sinister. Or… in his own twisted way, did he actually like her? He obviously realized she was incredibly intelligent during those matches, even if he sadistically enjoyed mocking her, enough to know she’d do well with an education. Did he play chess with her so much not just because he enjoyed tormenting her, but enjoyed her as a person as well? It obviously does not excuse what a racist sadistic shithead he is, and I’m not saying he’s secretly nice- just that it could be he was incapable of relating to anyone in a healthy way. I actually think sending Ford to school could have just been an extension of his desire to torment her AND the only way he knew that would guarantee he remained important in her life. He didn’t ever plan to cash in on her debt, but knew it would kill her just to BE in his debt, and got pleasure out of that alone. He probably just thought it was funny and it was also a way to guarantee he’d live in her head rent free- and because deep down he knew she was a cool kid, he also wanted that. He didn’t want her to forget him, maybe, which is sick! But much more interesting than simply “he wanted a judge he could manipulate”.

But it’s also worth noting this is Ford’s (perhaps) final chance to win against Westing in the ultimate chess match. And I can’t help but think he is well aware how smart she is, so he invited her here specifically because he knew she could be his undoing, the one who unravels everything. So- if we go with the ‘Westing is seeking atonement’ theory- did he invite her to give her that satisfaction of finally beating him, like he always knew deep down she could? Because he WANTS to be beaten, to be found out and knows she deserves to be the one after all the hell he put her through? Or in the ‘Westing is still a complete monster’ theory- is his intention to torment her one last time, to show her she can’t win against him? (if it is, I think he may well find he’s gravely mistaken there).

I don’t think Westing can truly achieve “redemption” with this “game”, nor am I one to easily believe the Ultimate Shitty Capitalist can change easily, but if one thing can shake someone’s worldview and make them reevaluate how they live their life, the death of their child WOULD be a big one. So “this will actually be Westing’s weird twisted attempt at atonement” is a possibility I just can’t stop thinking about. If it is, it’s kind of funny and incredible he can’t stop being manipulative and traumatizing even when he decides he wants to do something good.

On top of all that, Angela and Sydelle get more clues and finally figure out the ‘America the Beautiful’ connection. God, so much to chew on this chapter! I really fear for these last nine chapters. I might end up writing a novel longer than the actual novel analyzing and recapping them if I’m not careful. But that’s how you know it’s a compelling story, so hats off to Ellen Raskin!

[autolenaphilia]

Mafia: City of Lost Heaven

The original Mafia from 2002 by Illusion Softworks is a weird and fascinating game. It is a third-person shooter somewhat in the vein of the GTA series.

It is set in the 1930s and is about a Mafia family, the Salieris in the fictional city of Lost Heaven. It focuses on the rise of player character Tommy Angelo in the Salieri organization. It is a standard gangster movie plotline, with the Godfather and director Martin Scorcese being referenced often. The character wants the money crime can give him and is successful as a mafioso, but he experiences conflict between the horrible things he must do and his conscience. This contradiction eventually destroys him and the story becomes a tragedy.

This cinematic gangster tragedy is an unusually ambitious story for an action video game at the time, and it isn’t entirely unsuccessful in those. Mainly it is because the 1930s gangster film atmosphere is so fully realized, more than the actual writing. The writing isn’t terrible, Tommy’s story is a coherent tragedy, but it does not quite reach the high level of its gangster movie inspirations.

And it has many of the problems of the genre, except even more so. The game depicts the mafia in quite glorifiying ways. The mafiosos in these guys wear nice suits and fedoras, drive nice cars and get to have cool gunfights with Tommy guns. And yet the story tries to have it the other way too, with the mafia depicted as ruthless violent people and crime leading to a tragic end. Tommy is himself frequently appalled at the things the family wants him to do and ultimately he ends up badly because of his mafioso life. The contradiction is obvious. It is the same trap the gangster films that inspired this game fall into. Gangster films want to show this cool escapist fantasy of gangsters because it is fun, yet both storytelling logic and any moral analysis demands crime leads to tragedy.

The story also has the problem of this opposition between “good” gangsters and “bad” gangsters that doesn’t make much sense. The plot driving the story for basically 4/5 of the game and especially the middle levels is this rivalry between the Salieri and Morello families that eventually becomes an outright war. And in order to have a more easily graspable “heroes and villains” situation, the narrative is clear that the Morellos are the worse mobster family. Don Morello kills people for bumping into his car and tortures people to death. He is presented as a vile and repellent villain from the first. It is the Morello mobsters which you kill for most of the game, and you kill a lot of them, and this somewhat over-the-top villainization is meant to justify that.

And Salieri doesn’t do these kinds of things, he doesn’t deal in drugs either and fights common thugs who mug and sexually assualt women. He is the “good” kind of gangster. Even his collecting of protection money is presented as actually providing some form of protection. It is an implausible idea to say the least, and the game is certainly aware of it. What drives the plot inthe last four levels of the game is that Don Salieri is becoming morally worse after his final victory over Morello, getting more greedy for money and power. Butthe game depicts him as committing ruthless murders even before that point. This inherent evil of the mafia is what drives the actual main storyline: the tragedy of Tommy.

This Salieri vs. Morello plot feels hollow, the game’s attempts to subvert it doesn’t work because it doesn’t feel credible to begin with. The over-the-top villainy of Morello and Salieri’s softer actionsfeel like sentimental nonsense from the very start. “This gangster is good, he protects people from common muggers OwO, but this gangster is bad, he tortures people >:(“. Salieri’s slide into further villainy after Morello’s defeat doesn’t feel credible either. For a subversion like that to work it must have some plausibility to start with, some emotional resonance with the audience, and it just doesn’t.

It makes the game feel like it buys into the glamorization of crime that is often present in the genre more than most actual gangster films do.

Speaking of that, I should mention the sexism of this game. Most gangster films certainly depict a male-dominated culture. In that, the genre reflects the real-life mafia, which is extremely male-dominated and misogynist, and it is arguable how much those films endorse that sexism as opposed to merely depicting it.

And I would argue Mafiafalls into endorsing it, at least in its storytelling. There are only tworeal female characters, and each only appears in one level each. Sarah is an especially outstanding example, for she becomesTommy’s wife. The level in which she appears Tommy rescues her from a sexual assault by some muggers and they have sex and fall in love. This is said to lead to their marriage, and I do literally mean “said” because we never see her again after that level. Tommy mentions her occasionally and his marriage to Sarah and their daughter is by his own admission his most important motivation.

And that is the purpose of women in the story of Mafia: to provide motivation for their husbands. Two other gangsters are similarly driven by their wifes and children to break with the Salieri family’s obligations, in explicit parallels to Tommy’s situation. And it is not just sexist writing, it is ineffective writing too. Tommy’s marriage is meant to be very important to him as a character, and it is problem in the actual story it is never shown. We never get to see Tommy’s and Sarah’s supposedly idyllic family life, only hear Tommy talk about how it is the most important thing for him, which weakens any emotional empathy we might feel with him.

The level with Sarah at least features a bunch of dialogue between Tommy and Sarah and it is nice I suppose, but it is not enough. Sarah is also depicted as a bit of a bimbo or at least extremely naive, as she doesn’t seem to be aware the Salieri’s are well a mafia family, which seems unrealistic considering how closely connected she is with them. (She grew up as the daughter of the bartender in the Salieri’s Bar and works there, a location in which they literally shoot rival gangsters in at one point).

The writer of Mafia, Daniel Vavra would many years later become a gamergater, probably the most prominent developer to sympathize with the movement. And while it is of course a disappointment, it is not entirely unexpected. He was by far not the worst misogynist in video games or anything,

but just looking at Mafia, it is not strange at all that Vavra as a game writer would feel threatened of the very idea of feminist analysis of video games.

I talked about the story far more than I wanted to when I started writing this, and it is actually not the most interesting thing about this game, it is actually the city of Lost Heaven itself, the attempts at realism in the gameplayand the cars.

The city of Lost Heaven is one of the more fully realized cities in video games, and it is clear a lot of effort and thought was put into its design. Even the map of the city which you use to navigate it showed a lot of effort. It has (printed)creases, stains and pen markings drawn on it just like a real map would. The original box(that I owned) came with an actual physical copy of the map, which was very fun to have,although bringing up the map in-game by pressing tab was certainly the more practical option.

It is perhaps not a huge world compared to modern open-world games, but it was huge for 2002 and it is varied in a semi-realistic way. Lost Heaven is divided into various distinct areas just like a real city would. There is an industrial area, a working class housing area (“Hoboken”), a detached housing area for the upper middle class on the outskirts (Oakwood), an area with mansions for the rich (Oak Hill), ethnic ghettos like Chinatown or Little Italy. The basic idea seems to have been is to recreate an American city from the period in miniature.

And the areas have been given a lot of effort to make them appear more tangible. The building models and textures are different of course, but you can also detect a difference in the pedestrians. People in working clothes walk around in the industrial area and the working class area of Hoboken, whereas you can primarily see the nice looking suits and dresses in the richer areas of of town. It clearly took great effort to program and it contributes greatly to the mood. Even the cars seem to vary slightly, with the older and cheaper cars more abundant in the poorer districts, but the difference I think is lesser compared to the pedestrians.

The care with which Lost Heaven was constructed creates this compelling atmosphere. It feels like you are driving around in a 1930s American city. The aesthetics and atmosphere make the gangster story work better than it otherwise would. Lost Heaven simply feels more real than most video game cities do. And this is despite the dated graphics.The textures might oftenbe very grainy, shop signs especially are a blurry mess, but even they were made with some effort.

Let’s talk about the cars too, because they encapsulate this game in both aesthetics and gameplay. The cars are all based on real cars of the period, even if the names are all changed to avoid any claims of trademark infringement. Fords are called “Bolts” and Chrysler Airflows are called “Ulver Airstream” for example. If you know anything about older cars, you can however easily recognize many of them them under the changed names. an early game car is unmistakeably a Ford model T for example. Also some cars are far more common than they should be, like the concept car Pierce Silver Arrow of which only five were built is a common rich man’s car in the game under the name “Silver Fletcher”.

The cars driven by the NPCs are used to show the passage of time in the game, which goes from 1930 to 1938. As the years go by in story, older cars get more uncommon (but don’t disappear entirely) and new models are introduced. Your access to cars in gameplay also improves as you progress in the story. You go from slow, fragile cars like the aforementioned T-ford to fast, powerful and sturdy cars. The effort put into the cars from the research to the NPC programming is another thing that helps create the compelling mood of Mafiaand the city of Lost Heaven.

The cars are a good example of how the game often prioritizes atmosphere and verisimilitude over fun and accessible gameplay. The driving in this game is not a side-thing like it would be in most action games and cars in this game handle fairly realistically for this type of game. It is still arcadey, but far less arcadey than you would expect from a non-driving simulator. And most importantly, cars are period accurate in that they are both slower and more clunky to handle than modern cars.

Damage to the car also has more consequences than you might expect. A crash might damage the engine causing the car to go slower, a bullet rupturing a tyre makes the car far more difficult to handle, a shot to the gas tank will cause the fuel to leak out(fuel is never really a problem in the primary story mode, but it is there as a game mechanic and can be relevant in the free ride mode). The early-game cars are more fragile and vulnerable to crashes and the like, but none (outside a special car in the game’s free ride mode which not available in the regular story) are immune to these problems.

So this game prioritizes realism over player enjoyment, practically the only obvious concession to the player is that you always have automatic gearchanges available, but you can also choose to change gears manually if you want to. It is frankly oftenfrustrating, even the best cars in this game can be difficult to handle.

Car chases in this game are brutally difficult because of this, and the game’s most infamous level is the fifth one where you have to compete in a car race, driving a fairly period-accurate racing car. It has perhaps the best speed and acceleration of all the car’s in this game, but handles terribly. It is perhaps the most difficult level in the game, and even the developers seem to have realized how unfair it is. You could cheat in the original box copy version of the game which I played as a kid and the GOG version has an easy mode for the race.

A lot of the game is actually about this car hierarchy mentioned before. Typically at the beginning of each level you are given a new car by the Salieri’s mechanic Ralphy, and it is usually better than the car he gave you last level (he also teaches you how to steal it, which isn’t that useful in the story mode, but gives you that ability in other game modes). At the end of most levels, you are also given the opportunity to do an optional side-mission for another mechanic, Lucas. If you succeed, Lucas teaches you how to steal a really capable car. Typically the car you can get from Lucas will be better than the ones Ralphy will give you for the next 2 levels at least.

So the clunky car mechanics both give period verisimilitude and a sense of progression throughout the game.

And it does certainly add to the atmosphere and sense of realism. Mafia’s cars feel more real than most video game cars, but they are also oftenfrustrating to use in gameplay.

But Mafia priortizing its verisimilitude over player enjoyment doesn’t stop there. In each level you are given an objective, typically somewhere else in the city than where you start (which is usually Salieri’s bar). And you have to drive from the starting point to where the actual level starts. After the level is over, you have to drive all the way back.

You can’t just speed your way through the city either, because Lost Heaven’s cops will notice you breaking the speed limit or running a red light and fine you. The fine doesn’t actually cost you anything in the story mode, but it takes up time and negates any time you won by speeding. You can run away but the cop cars will follow and try to arrest you (which is a game-over), and if you try to kill them they will shoot back. The police will usually radio in for back-up too, so you will have to evade or kill the cops (including the back-up) to escape, both of which are fairly difficult.

So the best idea is to keep to the speed limit of 40 mph and don’t run any red lights. You can toggle a speed limiter with the F5 button which caps your car’s speed at 40 miles. It adds to the realism the developers are going for, but in order to play the actual level you have to have this bit of tedium with the drive both before and after. It is basicallya commute except with a varying destination.

The developers was probably aware of the tedium on some level. During the first half of the second level you get to play Tommy during his pre-gangster life as a taxi driver. It is literally just driving from point A to B under a time limit, and the customer will get cranky if you crash the car, and getting a speeding ticket is game-over here of course. The customer dialogue is often rude and theydoesn’t even thank you for most of the time. It is super-tedious and clearly intended to get the player to understand why Tommy became a gangster, since this boring dead-end job is his alternative. The problem of course is that a lot of his life as a gangster consists of driving from point a to point b in a similar fashion.

The game’s obsession with verisimilitude also extends beyond the driving to the action. Without being entirely realistic, Tommy is on the flimsier side of shooter game protagonists and can’t take a lot of bullets before dying. It is like in Max Payne, where a point-blank shotgun blast can practically kill the player character in one hit. You can find healing in first aid boxes boxes, but they are rare. Reloading before your magazine is empty also means you lose any bullets left in the magazine.

And unlike Max Payne, there are no quicksaves or manual saves whatsoever. Saves are done automatically at certain checkpoints and you have to re-start at those if you die. This save system makes this game extremely difficult, since you have to sometimes practice entire segments in order to progress. It is a lot of having to memorize where an enemy mobster pops out so you can shoot him before he shoots you.

The combat is certainly well-made and sometimes quite fun. There are like the cars some weak weapons, but overall weapons feel powerful and the environments and set-pieces are often enjoyable. But the action like the rest of the game is frustratingly difficult.

And that is the game, pretty much. You have a tedious drive to have a big spectacular shoot-out that is frustratingly difficult and you have another drive back. Sometimes there is a car chase, but that’s it. There is a stealth level that tries to change up the formula where you break into a villa, but the game is not really built for stealth so it is frustrating and very much not fun. Then there is the side-missions from Lucas on your drive back, usually a timed fetch-quest of some kind. They do add variety and have some interesting story ideas but can be frustrating in their own right.

There is also the free ride game mode, where you get to explore Lost Heaven freely and do whatever you want, although there is not that much to do, except get into car chases/fire fights with cops or random gangsters you can aggro if you want. The oddest game mode is “free ride extreme”, where you get to do various bizarre quests to unlock equally bizarre cars. It is a weird mode, especially for this game, as you have this usually serious aiming-for-realism game letting its hair down and going for outright comedic surrealism.You get to chase down a super-fast npc named Speedy Gonzales, that sort of thing. The mission certainly have surreal imagination to their credit, even if they can be as frustrating as the rest of this game.

So is Mafia a good game? It is hard to say. A lot of my fond memories of this game comes from playing an already old by that point box copy as a teen when I didn’t have access toor had played many other games, so nostalgia plays into my fondness for this game.

Replaying it now, the game’s faults are more apparent. When it comes to story, the game certainly stood out back then, and the tragedy of Tommy Angelo the unwise still broadly works, but its re-telling of gangster movies has not aged that well. Gameplay-wise the game is difficult in a way that feels frustrating rather than fun, and there is a lot of tedious driving from point A to B. Some of the action set-pieces are exciting, but the high difficulty and limited save system essentially means replaying large chunks of them almost to the point of memorization.

There are many other games like the GTA series that have a similar mix of third-person action with driving which have more easily enjoyable gameplay. Mafia seems to care more about making its world believable than any kind of player enjoyment.

And it is probably its world, the city of Lost Heaven that still fascinates about this game. A lot of work and love went into Lost Heaven, and it shows. Lost Heaven is an atmospheric and memorable place. Mafia makes a lot of strange gameplay choices just to make Lost Heaven seem more real, choices that not many other games would have made for good reason, because thatlevel of realism is not that fun.

The result is that this is a game where you play a badass 1930s gangster not just during daring shootouts in mobster wars, but also during his slow drive to and from hisgangster work, and youhas to follow the traffic laws so he isn’t ticketed. It is 1930s Gangster simulator 2002, or an approximation there of.

Mafiaisn’t alwaysa fun game, there is a long stretchesof frustration and tedium here, but it is frequently interesting and a clear labour of love, atmospheric, weirdand fascinating.

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

It’s no secret that Republicans are anti-intellectual, but it makes you wonder what their end goal is?  Why do they keep electing dumber and dumber presidents?  Is it just to own the libs?  Do they just not care?  They’ll get what they want regardless of how smart their presidents are, so why always pick the low hanging fruit?

The only smart Republican of the last 60 years was Bush Sr, and he was a one-term wonder who rode Reagan’s coattails into office.

Nixon was notoriously incompetent as VP, almost beat Kennedy in 1960, threw what should have been a career ending shit fit in 1962 after losing the California governor’s race, but not only came back in 68 and win because Goldwater was so unpopular in 64, but won 72 in the greatest landslide in history up to that point.  Corrupt to the bone, he resigned before he could be impeached for hiring burglars to steal dirt on a political opponent, covering it up, and lying about it.

Ford was appointed VP to replace scandal stricken Spiro Agnew, specifically chosen because he was known as an honest politician.  His reputation evaporated the second he became president because his first act was to pardon the guiltiest man in the country; he lost handily in 76.

Reagan was an actor who wanted to play politician so he could hurt the people he didn’t like; blacks people, poor people, gay people, women.  It was a power trip for him, and because he was good at reading cue cards and delivering jokes written by other people, everyone let him get away with murder.  He committed treason by selling weapons to Iran; this isn’t hyperbole, the actual definition of treason includes giving aid to out enemies, and after the oil and hostage crises of the 70s, Iran was an enemy first and foremost.  Oliver North took the blame and had his secretary shred the evidence, the President Bush pardoned everyone involved.  Reagan won in an even bigger landslide than 72 in 84, and Bush won in a major upset against Dukakis in 88.

Bush lost in 92 in no small part because of Ross Perot splitting the ticket; no third party candidate has ever done better nationwide than Perot in 92, with 19% of the vote (though he didn’t win a single state, which some minor candidates have done).  Clinton won with 43% of the popular vote.  Forty-three percent!  57% of people voted against him, and he won.  92 was a farce, as was 96 with less than 50% voter turnout, the lowest in modern history.  Perot ran again and got 8.4% of the vote, Republican Bob Dole only got 40.7%, and Clinton got 49.2%.  This means that less than a quarter of eligible voters voted for Bill Clinton, and he still won.  FARCE!

Al Gore rightfully won in 2000, but the conservative majority Supreme Court stole it from him.  Florida was too close to call; whichever candidate won it would become president.  George W. Bush’s brother Jeb was governor, and he ordered the federally mandated recount be stopped, breaking the law.  The Supreme Court decided not to restart the recount for no discernible reason besides they wanted Bush to win.  He was notoriously dumb, stereotypically dumb, so dumb a lot of people thought it was an act and voted for him because they thought he was a secret genius who was just pretending to be a cowboy running for president off his daddy’s legacy.  He was the stupidest president we had ever had up to that point, and hired a lot of smart people to do horrible things so he could claim plausible deniability.  That Obama didn’t send Dick Cheney to the Hague was a deafening silence.  Bush only won re-election in 2004 because he started a war in Iraq in 2003 and the country didn’t want to change horses midstream; same exact tactic his daddy used, only this war lasted longer than the Gulf and “worked” as planned.

2008 was a ceremonial race; McCain didn’t stand a chance.  He was not incompetent, but his running mate was.  Sarah Palin was even dumber than Bush, and like Gingrich in the 90s was responsible for a conservative revolution we’re still feeling today.  Barack Obama wasn’t an amazing president, but he was an AMAZING candidate.  Everybody loved Obama in 2008, he won more votes than any candidate in history until 2020.  McCain was a career moderate, and after the last 8 years of failure both parties were running on a platform of “I am not George W. Bush.”  Turns out a young charismatic smart black man is less like Bush than another old white guy.

Obama lost a ton of momentum going into 2012 because he didn’t really DO anything his first term.  His only major accomplishment was the Affordable Care Act, which was an act of the Democratic congress than anything else, and it still wasn’t nearly as progressive as it needed to be (the US is still the only developed nation without universal healthcare).  Romney, a Republican governor from the Democratic stronghold of Massachusetts, could have beaten him were he not a classist piece of shit.  Romney hated poor people more than Reagan, and once wore brown face to a campaign event to make himself look more like Obama (they didn’t paint his hands or neck, just his face).  Obama made a lot of promises he didn’t keep, in no small part because of the Tea Party and the devastating losses in 2014 (we suffer under Mitch McConnell because of that).

2016 was a dumpster fire that shouldn’t have happened, and if either party had run a different candidate, it wouldn’t have.  Sanders would have beaten Trump, Clinton would have beaten Cruz.  It was a perfect storm of a very unpopular and insincere grandma running against a cartoon supervillain.  You couldn’t repeat that with what we know now.  Your vote in 2016 came to represent who you were as a person; people took it to the extremes, and the sunk cost fallacy made the entire Republican party shift so far rightward that we have actual concentration camps now and NOBODY GIVES A SHIT!  Trump was a game show host, a used car salesman famous for being tacky and dumb and offensive.  He was KNOWN for running his companies into the ground, that was his MO, he made a career out of bankruptcy, and Republicans still can’t believe that he drove us into the worst economic depression since the last Republican (history repeat itself, whoop-dee-doo).  Biden won in 2020 because of record turnout, though 2020 was closer to the intentional walk of 2012 than the home run of 2008 in terms of enthusiasm for the candidates.

If we’ve learned anything its that Republicans just keep getting worse and worse, so it’s getting hard for me to imagine what 2024 has in store.  Will Trump risk losing the popular vote 3 times in a row for a second term?  i think he’ll pretend to so he can scam millions of dollars out of his base, but he’ll either lost the primaries and tank the Republicans by running third-party, or he’ll drop out and endorse one of his spawn.  If Biden decides not to run in 2024, the nomination will almost certainly go to Kamala Harris, at which point I expect the Republicans to run a woman as well, so that we’re guaranteed the first woman president; she’ll be young, and white, and blonde.  My money’s on Ivanka.  Kamala vs. Ivanka will be a repeat of the 2016 dumpster fire, only worse because then everyone would be acting like both candidates are feminist icons, #GirlPower #SheRunsTheWorld #WarCrimesAreBetterWithTwoXChromosomes  If Biden DOES run again, then I suspect the Republican pool will be wide early on (Prick Scott, Ron DeathSantis, Uncle Tom Cotton, Nikkki Haley, you name it), only to shrink before the primaries as they all coordinate to get behind someone strong enough to defeat an incumbent.

Republicans are very good at coordinating; they are the party of “Follow the Leader.”  Whoever is in charge has 100% authority, no ifs, ands, or buts, no questions asked, just follow orders.  It would be easy to call them lemmings, but it’s more insidious than this.  They run dumb candidates for president, but have very smart people working behind the scenes to do horrible things.  They’re willing to follow orders blindly to ensure that the party prospers, whereas Democrats are chicken running around with their heads cut off.  There are no Democratic leaders.  Pelosi?  Schumer?  Nobody likes those dinosaurs!  The only really popular Democrats are progressives, and they will never have power as long as the moderates have a majority of the caucus.  AOC could be a senator someday; she could replace Schumer whenever he retires, but that would hinge on her not having any moderate primary challengers.  Moderates are still very popular because they are seen as “electable,” even though they never DO anything once elected.  Progressives have big ideas and the concrete plans to get them done, but the moderate establishment is afraid of losing power, and would rather placate the other side doing nothing, changing nothing, making no waves.  The party needs to shift leftward, or the country is doomed.

I would suggest the progressives splitting off to form a third party, but that would almost certainly destroy left-wing politics in this country as every safe seat would become split.  In an ideal world, it would be a nominal change; they would be the Progressive Democratic Party, they would continue to run in blue districts and caucus with Democrats on votes, but would advertise themselves as anti-establishment.  They would be like the New Democrats in Canada, which now that I think about it is a very bad idea because the New Democrats have no power and end up giving more votes to the Liberals and Conservatives instead.  The Progressive solution is intended to show the caucus that the moderates don’t have total control, but it would end up with the moderate Democrats shooting themselves in the foot, running against Progressives in every seat, handing them to the Republicans.  Every election cycle people act like a loss would spell “the end of the _____ party,” but this would actually be it for the Democrats.  It would be a turning point, like the 1960s, with millions of people changing parties out of principle, a major shift.  A Red Scare

I just want to crawl in a hole and die.  I hate politics.

[artsymeeshee]

sorry if this is the wrong place but I'm so sick and tired of people being mean about Ford all the time... he's the only character with struggles I can relate to but posts saying ugly things about him always get obscenely popular. and it's just him, not even villains get hate this bad. it's everywhere, it never gets better and I just want to die, it's like a reminder that I must not deserve to be happy either. what do I do.

The only advice I could possibly give is to block any of the blogs that make posts like that. It’s not a lot but it can help. The fact that there are still people that make ugly posts about Ford is so fucking insane to me. What in the world do you want from him? Like seriously. Talking about this is pissing me off but I’m gonna go ahead and go on.

Ford suffered with trust issues for YEARS. Does he still have a little bit of trust issues? Oh absolutely. But he is making the effort to open up and let people in. He’s still gonna be wary but he’s making the effort.

Just talking about this is reminding me of those messages about Ford not actually caring about Stan and making it up to Stan by asking to go sailing with him because he was “saving face” and not because he genuinely wanted to. I’m sorry, but what in the fuck??? May I need to remind those who STILL question Ford’s love for Stan that Ford himself had to pull the fucking trigger to erase Stan’s mind. It was so fucking hard for him and he has to live with that. And if you’re still having doubts, there are opportunities in the show that Ford makes to try and patch his and Stan’s broken relationship by offering to include Stan in Ford’s and Dipper’s DD&D game. Ford went off his high-horse to have the decency to tell Stan thank you when they were forming the circle.

Ford went through a thing called character development. Not a whole lot of characters go through that and the fact, although there’s still a whole lot we don’t know about him, he has a pretty established personality and so many can relate says a lot. So if some can’t clearly fucking see that, then that’s on them. If you don’t like him, okay fine. That’s your opinion. But if you’re gonna talk trash and be a fucking asshole about it and say all this awful shit, grow up. Go and do other shit but not this. 

Don’t ever think you don’t deserve happiness because some random fucks on the internet don’t know anything better to do than shit on other people’s happiness. I’ve been telling myself almost all the time I don’t deserve happiness because I can’t do shit like the rest of the people my age can and I’m gonna amount to nothing. Honestly? Fuck that mentality. And it’s been 4 fucking years since the finale. The fact some are still hung up disliking Ford and not seeing how much he changed is their own damn fault. In this house, we love characters and their flaws and are proud at how much they changed for the better. Just remember to not take any opinions personally. At the end of the day, they’re just strangers we don’t know and fact they can go about their day like they did nothing wrong while others get affected negatively is insane. Surround yourself with people who make you happy. Block out those that make you uncomfortable. Even block tags you know these blogs use. I’m sorry this got so long. Things like this piss me off and get me heated. If I get hate over this, alright then.

[itsmyregularcat]

Influenced by @white-cat-of-doom, and his Cats dream cast (please check it out), I have made my own.

This is going to be a tough one to figure out, but here is my Cats dream team, as of today.

I wish to see more productions to be better informed in my choices, so I need to get on some bootlegs I guess! (Some choices are actually going to be based off of assumptions of how the actors portray them).

I already know a bunch of my choices are going to be from the Broadway Revival (because I really like that production), and almost all are going to be from newer productions because I am way more familiar with them.

In alphabetical order:

Admetus / Macavity: Thomas Inge (Asia Tour 2017/2020 and UK International Tour 2018/9)

I quite like the Macavity redesign for Vienna 2019 and Asia 2020, so he gets the nod just for this. Otherwise, he is an established Admetus and seems to have fun with it.

Alonzo / Rumpus Cat: Fletcher Dobinson (Asia Tour 2020)

I have never seen him perform as Alonzo, but he has this energy about him I cannot really describe. From short videos I have seen, he seems to have a 'snarky' side, and just has a hell of a time flirting about with everyone during curtain calls. He has the moves.

Bill Bailey / Tumblebrutus: Kolton Krouse (Broadway Revival 2016 / Cats 2019)

They can fly with the best of them. Their flip in with the ball during the end of the Old Gumbie Cat is a cool addition. No strong feelings for this character though.

Bombalurina: Rosemarie Ford (Cats 1998)

If anyone exemplifies what it means to be Bombalurina, I think Rosemarie wins. The duality of caring attitude and scornful nature, combined with her moves and her voice all make her a top pick. Also, slightly older Bombas I feel are better?

Honourable mentions: Christine Cornish Smith (Broadway Revival 2016) for sure, Suzie Melloy (Asia 2017/2020), and Tanya Valenzuela (Mexico 2018).

Carbucketty / Pouncival: Joel Morris (South Africa 2008 / UK Tour 2013 / Palladium 2014 / International Tour 2016)

He does a relatively good job being juvenile, but not annoying in his role. Him screwing around during Tugger's song, Moments Of Happiness, and Skimbleshanks is actually endearing to a point. No strong feelings for this character though.

Cassandra: Mariah Reives (US Tour 6)

Another pick I have never seen during performances, but she looks like a good Cassandra. She is really pretty and appropriately tall, so ¯\_( ツ)_/¯. Bonus points for her lighting up during Misto's song.

Honourable mentions: Jessica Buckby (2013 UK Tour), Danielle Cato (International Tour 2019), and Emily Pynenberg (2016 Broadway Revival)

Coricopat: Corey John Snide (2016 Broadway Revival)

He pairs up very well with my top Tantomile pick, and cannot realistically be separated. This legend was also a dance captain, involved with Cats 2019, and did a split track cover of Coricopat and Jennyanydots during his run.

Demeter: Zizi Strallen (London Revival / Palladium 2014)

Real talk, I love her as Tantomile in Cats 2019, and her singing voice is beautiful and distinct. Her as Demeter is a good bet, and she gives off a happy vibe during less serious points of the show. That happiness she puts in 2019 Tanto is what she did with 2014 Demeter.

Honourable mention: Lisette Pagler (Gothenburg 2006 / Stockholm 2009). The OG grey Demeter. She is absolutely beautiful, and her non-rep portrayal design is neat. She is also an actual singer in Sweden, so her voice is top notch. I really like her as Demeter. Also, Ella Nonini (International Tour / Asia 2020).

Electra: Leah Sue Morland (Cats 1998) or Lili Froehlich (2016 Broadway Revival)

I cannot reasonably pick one over the other, I have disproportionately strong feelings for both. Lili made me fall in love with Electra as a character (and I mean, look who my icon is!), and Leah cemented it before and after me seeing the Broadway Revival. They both make a modest ensemble cat seem so much more important. One of my favourite Cats across any production.

Etcetera: Jo Bingham (Cats 1998)

Boundless energy and happiness rolled into one bouncy cat. No one had a better time during Cats 1998, and for a cat that does not appear in many production afterwards, Jo just said f*ck it and did whatever seemingly came to mind to forge a legacy. Biting Coricopat’s ass remains a landmark moment in cinema. One of my favourite cats in the film without a doubt.

George: Frank Thompson (Cats 1998)

He is sort of always there, enjoying himself. If I would cut a cast member, George would be it. Sorry George.

Gus / Bustopher Jones / Growltiger: Rory Campbell (UK Tour / Zurich / London)

Dignified Busto. A good Gus that does not play off too much about being old and decrepit. If done properly, Growltiger (for the sake of Griddlebone) should make a return to more productions. Remove the total racism and the open misogyny inherent to many portrayals of Growltiger, and make it strictly about the lovers.

Grizabella: Jennifer Hudson (for real) (Cats 2019)

I know this one will ruffle feathers, but her sad sap performance is quite unrivaled in Cats. She brought the gloom and the dejection of being casted out to life. Her singing Memory is powerful as all hell, and filled with emotion. She wins the screaming match.

Jellylorum / Griddlebone: Freya Rowley (Cats 2019)

At this point you are probably thinking, ‘my lord, what the hell is this person on about?’. Freya does not sing in the movie, and is just a background cat, but my god is she the best cat there! During her time with actual stage productions, she was a principle Tantomile, and covered Demeter, Jelly, Jenny, and Cassandra as swing. I know she can sing (even though I have never heard it), and I want to hear / see her as the most novel Griddlebone around. Big orange energy - get with it.

Honourable mention: Sarah Jean Ford (2016 Broadway Revival)

Jemima: Veerle Casteleyn (Cats 1998 / London / Dutch Tour)

The most vanilla choice, but she was the face of Jemima / Sillabub and the Cats ‘franchise’ when the 98 film first came out, and rocketed her character to great importance and notoriety. They used her for promo shots after the movie came out realizing how popular her character had become. Veerle is the innocence of youth personified. By the way, I am taking her without the overdub.

Honourable mention: Arianna Rosario (2016 Broadway Revival / US Tour 6) and Dawn Williams (UK Tour 2013)

Jennyanydots: Eloise Kropp (2016 Broadway Revival)

A younger Jenny still as wild as any other. Her greater involvement during the show is also cool to see. The changes they made to the Broadway Revival may irk some, but the Gumbie Cat scene with the choreography change is my favourite I have seen so far. Eloise does a really good job, and has a chaotic energy that draws me to her.

Mistoffelees: Laurie Davidson (Cats 2019)

On my pursuit of pissing off the purists, here is another controversial choice. He provides a character development that I think would work out well on stage. Imagine it for a second, with Tugger or Munk hyping him up. No Mistoria though.

Honourable mention: Joseph Poulton (UK Tour 2013 / Palladium 2014)

Munkustrap: Jack Rebaldi (London / Madrid / Paris / Dusseldorf / German Tours)

The man is a serious Munk, who is versatile with his portrayals. He gets so into playing the character, and seems to be having a great time doing it. Plus, how the hell can someone do Munk in English, Spanish, French, and German in the course of three years? Madness.

Honourable mentions: Robbie Fairchild (Cats 2019) and friend-shaped Michael Gruber (Broadway / Cats 1998)

Mungojerrie: Drew Varley (Australia 1993 / London / Cats 1998)

One half of the chaotic duo present in Cats 1998, with an oustanding level of dumbassery and foolishness that encompasses Jerrie. He encapsulates that attitude very well, and pairs perfectly with my top Rumpleteazer.

Honourable mention: Dante Hernandez (Mexico 2013 / 2018)

Old Deuteronomy: Nicholas Pound (London / UK Tours / Palladium 2014 / International Tour)

A bit of a different choice, considering most people would likely pick Ken Page (and for good reason). Mr. Pound has a great voice, and welcoming vibe. Behind the scenes, he is a chaotic Old D. Plus, his name is Dick Pound.

Rum Tum Tugger: John Partridge (UK Tour / London / Cats 1998 / Berlin / Dusseldorf)

Velvety smooth voice, swagger coming out the hip thrust, and a playfulness suitable for the rockstar cat. No contest with this choice. He also does not play of RTT as being childish or over the top (*cough 2016 Broadway Revival / US Tour 6*), which is appreciated. Sorry Tyler Hanes, your vlogs were delightful, but your Tugger was a bit too much.

Rumpleteazer: Jo Gibb (London / Cats 1998)

Jo Gibb is the reason I became super obsessed with Cats, and probably why my favourite character is Rumple. Having initially seen the 2019 movie before the 1998 film, seeing her smiling face and adorable portrayal made me sort of fall in love with her. She is a perfectly mischievous Rumple, and I feel is the benchmark for most others. Her engagements with other characters is awesome, and she is just the ideal actor. Also, Cockney accent Rumple is best Rumple I do not make the rules.

Honourable mentions: Every other Teazer. All of them. There is no bad one. They all have my heart.

Skimbleshanks: Steven McCrae (Cats 2019)

Big daddy Skimble, with the red pants and the moustache. Tap dancing and ballet powerhouse. WOO WOO. Enough said.

Tantomile: Emily Tate (2016 Broadway Revival)

Given all Tantos do not really have an opportunity to set themselves apart because they are more of an ensemble Cat, I liked Emily from the beginning I saw her, and I think she is really cute. Her, paired with CJS, make a pretty ideal Cori and Tanto. Maybe I am swayed by the amount of lifts and spins they do together during the show? They have a beautiful synchronization and grace with their movements. 

Weaponize your Tantomiles, helicopter her above your Coricopats and take over. Kill Macavity. Become the Everlasting Cat.

Honourable mention: Kaye Brown (London / UK Tour / Cats 1998), Melody Rose (US Tour 6), Helen Gulston (RCCL Cruise). Realistically, all Tantos are good. I like Tantomile.

Victoria: Georgina Pazcogiun (2016 Broadway Revival)

A prominent soloist with the New York ballet, renowned for her distinctive style, and you can appreciate that if you watched a 2016 bootleg show. She has also pushed out against ballet norms by being "The Rogue Ballerina" as a means of embracing the qualities that make her unique as a dancer, such as her 'bigger' (in terms of ballet) body type. Her unique style as Victoria makes her my choice. Plus, she be sneaky.

Honourable mentions: Hannah Kenna Thomas (UK Tour 2013 / Palladium 2014 / International Tour / Vienna Revival), Tyler Lotzof (Asia Tour 2020), Alicia Beck (UK Tour 2013), Phyllida Crowley Smith (London / Cats 1998). Realistically, all Vics are good.

Any way, there is my shitshow of a production.

[xthexrawringx20sx]

who are your comfort characters? wanna talk about them for a bit? :)

oh my god thank you so much!!!!! i actually went to my computer so i can type better/faster with shaky hands lol

added a read more because it’s long

tw for: hallucinations/delusions, idk what else let me know if i need to tag it!

okay so...some of these are because i’m a dumb kinnie but yeah lmao

uh. basically the entire avengers group, but specifically the first movie time period. yknow the fanfictions about them all living in the same place and clint climbing around the vents and thor eating poptarts? yeah, that kind. kinda cringy but i used to vividly daydream living there and them all being my friends.

in a similar note, the most popular creepypastas that were involved in the “slender mansion” type of fanfic/headcanons are also super comforting! i used to imagine that ticci toby, ben drowned, and jeff the killer were all like. my best friends and we’d have huge cuddle piles or whatever lmao

the grunkles from gravity falls! i’m a dipper kin so i guess that makes sense, but even before i knew that they were super comforting. stan because he’s grumpy but still cares about his family, and also just...how easily he accepted people into his family (like when it shows how/why he offered wendy a job, soos, etc). ford because he’s weird!! and everyone’s pretty cool with that! honestly everyone in that show is comforting because they’re weird and it’s okay! seeing how he’d be so involved with whatever dipper was obsessed with made me so happy.

also winnie the pooh! it reminds me of when i was a kid and had sleepovers with my nanny (grandma) because i moved schools a lot and was bullied constantly so i never really had any friends. we’d watch winnie the pooh, chitty chitty bang bang, milo and otis, and sometimes random movies with jackie chan/abbott and costello/elvis because they were her favorite. also mary poppins! i remember she’d let me stay up late and watch whatever i wanted as long as i didn’t tell my parents about some of the games she played on her computer. that was my favorite, because i could watch adult swim and teen titans and goosebumps without getting in trouble

anya from anya’s ghost! i’ve mentioned this before, but she is such a big comfort to me. her negative body image, developing bad habits just to fit in, and forcing herself to change to just...disappear/be “normal” is so relatable. especially when she talks about how her mom is an immigrant from russia and she’s trying to leave all that behind. i really relate to that because that’s something i’ve experienced a lot and felt so alone with it (my mom + grandma are from germany). that distance from who you are, knowing almost nothing about your family, is hard. i’d hear classmates list off family members who were some of the first europeans in america, then i’d be able to back 1-2 generations to say something about germany, and on my dad’s side irish and native american. but that was it! and everyone on both sides of my family know almost nothing about our family past that because here it was a reason to be bullied or hurt. kids would joke that i was from space, or that i was a robot or a bad person and i was “hiding” stuff about my family. i dealt with horrible jokes about world war two. and once i read that book, i cried knowing that someone else understood. someone else felt alone, like that part of them that was supposed to be so important was just...gone. that someone else knew their parents + their siblings, their grandparents, and nothing else.

all of welcome to nightvale. all kin stuff aside, this is about the weirdness and how normal it is. but also, how janice is treated specifically. in old oak doors, when kevin is telling her dad about how they’ll basically “fix her” so she can walk, he tells him that she doesn’t need to be fixed. all my life, any sort of disability has been viewed as either my fault or something that needs to be fixed. my parents tried everything to cure my diabetes, and it eventually led to them blaming me for it at parts of my life where i was still coming to terms with it. i wasn’t diagnosed with anything for most of my life, my mom genuinely thought my scoliosis just “went away” along with asthma. disability was a bad word in my family, and still is. if i can’t fix the issue, i’m supposed to hide it/act like everyone else. they shame me when i can’t do a bunch of things because of my legs or back. they tell me every way i can fix it, even if those things will cause me more pain and suffering. it’s nice to see someone’s disability treated like a part of them, and not something that needs curing.

dan torrance from the shining/doctor sleep. especially doctor sleep. i know they’re not hallucinations, but when i saw it i just...felt so much for him. i’ve tried a lot of things to get rid of hallucinations. some of which i still struggle with. i kind of sometimes imagine him telling me that it’s okay, that they might seem real but that i’m in control even when it doesn’t feel like it. the part of the movies where he locks them in boxes? that’s one of my coping skills. it doesn’t always work but it makes me feel better when it does. i can’t always convince myself they’re not real. that’s the hardest part, so many of the advice i see involving hallucinations/delusions is making yourself believe they’re fake. but i can’t always do that! like right now, i know logically what is outside shouldn’t be there. but they’re there, they’re big and scary and very real. it helps to feel like someone’s there telling me “it’s okay, we’ve seen scarier and can make it through this”. not anything like “it’s in your head”, “they’re not real”, etc because they are and it makes me feel like i can’t trust people when they do that randomly.

that’s all i can think of right now, thank you so much it helps me a ton to just ramble like this! sorry it’s so long and probably a little embarrassing...have a wonderful day/night!!

[marsandchariot]

Lunar New Year Considerations

In honor of the Chinese Lunar New Year on February 12th, we wanted to draw into conversation a few of the archetypal relations between planets, signs, and Tarot. By acknowledging these alignments we feel we can begin to speak to strategies of conceptualizing universal, long-term intention within the space of individual will.

By some accounts, the order of the signs in the Chinese Zodiac was determined by the outcome of a race between the animals, which involved crossing a river. In the case of 2021’s sign, the Ox, fording the river was an easy feat. For the Rat it was more challenging, and so he enlisted the help of the Ox. This kind of assistance, to the Ox, was nothing, so he was glad to do it. However, when the Ox reached the other side, the Rat leapt to shore, coming in ahead. As a symbol of this new year, the Ox may speak to principled provision for the movement of others whether or not they “deserve” it and whether or not that provision is “rewarded.” A race contradicts the shape of the zodiac, in which all signs are both before one and after another. Beyond the conceit of the race, there is no hierarchy in the signs. The Ox may remind us of ways that we can expand our understanding of achievement through sacrifices we make in the interests of others--even if that understanding applies to an increased sense of when sacrifices are too great or too many, and require us to more clearly elucidate personal boundaries as a result.

Though we may expect movement or lightness from Saturn’s transit into an air sign, Aquarius is also fixed (as opposed to cardinal or mutable). The experience of fixed air, rather than a dramatic deviation from the cardinal earth sign of Capricorn, highlights points of synonymous connection between fixed air and cardinal earth. It does us well to remember that Saturn is domiciled in both signs. While Capricorn felt heavy, almost cloying at times, as if a weight were intent on dragging us backward rather than helping us move forward, we were still moving, even if only in resistance to inertia, and with considerable, discernible effort. Taking into account the scant although intense time spent in Aquarius thus far, we might be learning that levity does not necessarily lead to momentum, or greater range of motion does not equal speed. Instead of the cold weight of earth, we have parched, stale air. In the interest of minimizing dejection, however, let us also remember that both Capricorn and Aquarius have experience with and valuable perspectives of water—Capricorn of its depth and Aquarius of its vast surface.

We might describe perspective as individual, and movement as collective. Though in some ways we feel the energy of forward-orientation, we have to wait for this energy to disperse and manifest itself across a spectrum of ritual processes and understandings before it results in something more akin to collective action. Perhaps it feels like the childhood game of “Mother, May I”. We probably wish we could sprint ahead and leap across the river (though it’s more likely we will wade and sink into it: next month is a new moon in Pisces; in May Jupiter will move into Pisces, its ancient domicile), but that feels in many ways like it requires a power of flight we don’t yet possess. Even though we have entered a prolonged period of air, we’re still more or less stuck on the ground for now.

Here are the cards we selected to help us consider this feeling of stasis more deeply:

THE STAR:

The Chinese Lunar New Year occurs on the first new moon that appears between January 21 and February 20. On February 11th, when the moon was at its newest, she was near the end of her stay in Aquarius, whose tarot equivalent is the Star. The Star is the phase that comes after a huge disruption, a radical change, like an attempted coup or a violently contentious regime change. The Star wants to recuperate, wants to reconnect with what’s essential: the conditions for positive transformation and healing. The Star is the first in the sequence of Star, Moon, and Sun in the Major Arcana, which occurs after the Tower and before Judgment. It is a fall from the Tower that conversely sends us upward, through a celestial sequence that concludes in resurrection, re-embodiment and re-integration. The Star wants us to ask ourselves--wants us to remember--what it is we actually want: for ourselves, for our communities, for our planet. In this way, this new moon was a good time to set intentions and goals for not only your individual growth but also for transformation at a source level for all. And that is the first step. The Moon explains for us step number two.

THE MOON:

Although the new moon occurred on February 11th in Aquarius, its transition into Pisces on the day of the Lunar New Year shows that the moon does not conform as cleanly to our measurements of her cycle as we would like to imagine. Pisces is also the equivalent of The Moon card; in considering Piscean modes we can draw from the Moon a few ideas of how to approach our unconscious selves in ways that advance individual needs within collective conversation, which is to say we progress from the aspiration of the Star to the meditative contemplation at play in the image of the Moon.

In the Moon card, we see two towers, much like the twin pillars in the card of the High Priestess, a card which Selah Saterstrom describes as representing the alternative to binary consciousness. In the Moon we also see the emergence of a subterranean entity, a third figure. This feels reminiscent of all water signs, but the card’s equivalence with Pisces elucidates the relationship we may cultivate to our unconscious as dark or esoteric, from which we expect certain “truths” to emerge, sometimes without developing a practice that brings us into communication with ourselves in a regular or sustainable way. When we think of our deeper self as a catacomb from which painful ideas might burst forth and surprise us, it becomes harder to cultivate a loving relationship with those dimensions of our emotional life that we suppress as abject or inappropriate.

The coinciding of Pisces with the new year might suggest the beginning of a process in traversing the boundaries between conscious and unconscious awareness, without characterizing our unconscious as perhaps secret or forbidden. On this occasion we may reject the binary imposition of progress, which implies that we leave one state and enter another; we embrace a “third” option, which is that of fluid exchange, of exit and re-entry, an experience of consciousness defined by a fluctuation of coming into and out of. This is the nature of the moon.

While the Sun is about creative and contemplative dream work in service of conscious action, the Moon is about facing our shadows and integrating them into our conscious being as a basis of our presence in the world. The Moon reminds us that we can’t move forward without meaningfully addressing and integrating our flaws and wrongful past actions. While on the level of individual consciousness the Moon is about shadow work, on the level of the collective it is about reparations.

Tarot decks used: Smith-Waite Borderless; Small Spells

[monkey-network]

Who is Best Girl in Konosuba?

Welcome back, fellow weebs, to Media & Entertainment Developers Essentials Lessons Book. Today on MEDELB, we’re discussing the question that existed since one of the most disastrous years in the 21st century, 2017. A question that dives into one the greatest anime of all time. Yes, even better than Dragon Ball Z, Cowboy Bebop, and Steven Universe. I am talking about KonoSuba: God's Blessing on this Wonderful World! Today we’re discussing: who is best girl? Aqua? Darkness? Megumin? Your father?

Now it’s important to know that KonoSuba is genius because it supports judicial simplication, a professional term that I can break down for you. Judicational Sampling is the idea that a free society does not impinge on the actual taxing benefits of localized source banks. KonoSuba is genius because it made a lot of money... to make more KonoSuba. It is not Disney, whom is the greatest bottom in the Hollywood industry, but in truth I wouldn’t want it to be. Sometimes, genius is fine where it is and you shouldn’t question it. There are people who question why KonoSuba originated as a light novel, and those people are to be shunned because they also believe Harry Potter is worth reading, straight people are bad, and that ranch dressing is good on pizza. You know, the alt-right and we have enough problems on our hands as it is. And as the great Joe Biden once said,

But today’s focus will be on discussing on who is best girl and how that affects our society. And if you are one of the people unaware of this discussion, then perhaps you should realize that any comments you have contradict themselves and function as your self-righteous wannabe soapbox. In short, you’re acting like a su crit, so please read history. Because ultimately, I am a proud KonoSuba kinnie and member of the intellectual anime community founded by the General Rebecca Sugar. I would appreciate it if you would recognize the context and respect. It. Because ultimately again, I sent you all a respectful anon about this earlier today which you ignore and this sounds, smell, looks, feels, tastes... like Racism. But back to KonoSuba, let us discuss Megumin.

Now, Megumin is a good person. She can create explosions which are big.... explosions, this represents her pride. She wears red which is the color of your blood, so that could mean satanic blood pacts. Megumin represents the resolve in critical deductive intelligent smart reasoning where blind subservience has been... eradicated. But what is blind, subservience? For a simple understanding, think of it as the cooked Molotov of slice of life shows or some other perceptively anodyne prosaic internationalized statement.

Overall, Megumin is a short person so choosing her as best girl is pedophilia and if you try to tell me otherwise, you are a nazi troll and deserve the chamber. And if you agree with me, don’t speak if you’re Afro-American like myself. Because this is just a cartoon for kids and you’re complaining too much about it. Or am I?

Next, we have Darkness, which is a force parallel to light and is also used in the form of attacks in the Kingdom Hearts universe. Those who follow the path of Darkness will usually gain untold power at the expense of something of their former selves, so this naturally explains why she is an explicit masochist. Then again, her real name is Lalatina Dustiness Ford which explains a lot more. We continue asking who she is, and what she is, but nobody is asking how Darkness is. Because looking like the poster child for Aryan superiority with her blonde hair and blue eyes, she isn’t capable of being best girl because that would mean the guillotine for you and I love you too much to not let that happen. She is overall the better character for inventing good things like the dominatrix, but she cannot be best girl because she is a good character and supports capitalism. I too support capitalism but I hate people who think capitalism is alright, if that makes sense.

Aqua is a better contender for best girl because I was fortunate enough to see less porn of her. Kazuma notably has called her worthless, but Kazuma is what internet users would call an braincel. He played video games, so obviously he isn’t one to be speaking on value. Aqua was able to survive getting vored by a frog multiple times, so clearly she is more cunning than the average E-girl. Aqua is able to make the most of her situation and entertain people with watersports.... and tricks. Kingdoms Hearts wishes it had a character named Aqua as cool as this one, but then again, you’d have to wait 4 more years for KH4 so what life would you have? She is mostly blue, which is a color, and I prefer it when anime has color. If it doesn’t, it’s racist. As the wise Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez once said this last November, 

This Disproves Objective Analysis.

She represents the element of the holy flood thesis joining the narrative tripling in subsequent disagreement that there any factual basis to the truth that Kazuma is wrong but because there’s simple authentic observation there is no objective truth. Plus she cries a lot, and if there’s anything I learned from Steven Universe, it’s that if you cry good enough, you can topple entire totalitarian empires. Except for General Rebecca Sugar, because she can smell your fear and absorb it accordingly. She is basically the Mother Teresa of animation. Again, great contender. But we have to consider the others so let’s move on.

Next, we have Wiz. 

...

...

Next, we have Sylvia from their first and latest movie. It’s as they say, if it is new, it is better. I believe Sylvia is more than the sum of their parts, they are caring and charismatic and can turn into a powerful creature. None of the other characters can turn into a powerful creature, and that is why they possess internalized misogyny. The slimy veneer of quasi empiricism can be a very disgusting tool for nefariously slipping in one’s own rotten viewpoint or value. One that you know might otherwise be c̷h̵a̷l̸l̸e̴n̴g̴e̸d̴ ̵a̸s̴ ̸r̵i̷t̸u̵a̷l̵i̴s̵t̷i̴c̵a̷l̶l̵y̶ ̶s̷u̸p̸e̸r̶l̴a̷t̴i̶v̵e̸ ̵o̶r̸ ̷p̶e̵r̵h̷a̵p̵s̵ ̷y̵o̴u̸ ̸t̵h̴i̴n̸k̵ ̷t̴h̶a̶t̶ ̶w̷͍͍̠͉͚̦̦͛̔̓͗̏ā̵̛̬̜̂͋ṙ̸̨̐̌̈̅ ̸̦͔̣̮͔͋̊̑̕i̷̛͎̽̅́͑s̴̠̩̟̝͙̍̏̀͌̑̕ ̷͚͔̦̜̜͊̾̽͊͂j̸̡̨̣̙̮̓͘ų̵̣͚̹̱̐͌̎̑̈̎̆s̶̢͚̺͉̰͂̄̉̾͑ț̵̤̭͔̲̲̮̀͒̏̐̓ ̵̡̙̟̖͐́͋͝p̷̙̳̣̫͍̬͗̽͒̀e̸̻̯̽̆̇́͑͒a̵̡̞̣̫̫̯̰̿͛̅̄̅͂c̷̀͐̊͗͝ͅē̵̠͕̫̙ ̶̻̼̳͑̓̈́̿͐ŵ̷̼̝̣͇̞̞̺̍͋i̸̠͓̪̣̜͍̘͊͂̀̄t̸̟̣͉̼͑̒͜h̵̥̗̲̩̑̏́͜ ̵̡̠͉̝̾̆̌̇͐e̷̢̨̼̺͖̒̈́̃̃̆x̸̟̟͂́̄̍͛́̄t̴͖̣̼̫͇͐͋̆̽̎̚r̷͎̙̯͈͉̲̚a̵̩͎̥̺̮͂̀̃̚ ̸̠̜̣̥̜͍̠̌ṡ̴̢̡̐̽̅̃̇ͅt̴̖̣̹͙̙̼̟̔̐̚͝͝ĕ̵͔͍̤̼̂͌̐̑p̸̡̹̪̻͔̬͕̃̚s̸̫̙̈͛̉̋̉͝ ̶͔͚̽͝y̸̨̘͎̠͕̺̽̉̃o̶̜̥̺͔͑̏ͅu̵̓͜ ̴̨̦͉̀̊͊̓̌̃f̶̢̮̱̳̖̟̼̰͒̊̈͜i̸̯̼̫̩͚̇̉l̸̢̢̯̗̠̪̹͈͎͚̬̭̮̣̬̿̈́̍͘t̸͕͕̮̻̭̰̬͎̻̰̬̙̟̀́̍̋h̷̡̡͎͙̘̩̞̤̰̳͖͙̺͈̅̓͆ͅy̴̡̢̳̤̮̘̻͚̲̪̳̭̗̙͈̽́̔̄̓͊̅̍̓͗͑̓̈̿͝,̵̛͙͚̒͐̍̅̓͗͌̕ ̷̢̡͚̮̜͚͈̖̥̳̹̦̙͈̄́́͛̈́̈́ͅt̸̛̼̯̯̠̰͓̩͍̺̊̽̔͂͑̕ë̵̢̖͕̰͕̜̹̰̫͙̣̩͈́͐͐̿̆̽͌̓̀͐̊̑̀̆͗̕͜ͅͅs̴̢̡̜̯̀͋͛͒͐̌̓̕t̸̠̳̱̙̃̓̽̈̔͗̏̋̓̈̏ ̷̧̧̤͉̦̲̜͔̫̤̯́̽͊̕̚t̸̘̲̼̜̱̿̿͑̽́̈́͋̔͘u̶͍̞̜͛͜b̸̛̯̙̼̜͙̏̓̄̽͆̏͘͝ẹ̷̛̉̑̂ ̵̡̡̞͓̱̤̞̫͛̎̆͘͝b̸̡̡̟̫̱́̔̓̋͗̃̊ǫ̶͍͕̼̥̳͕͖̥͈̼̳̎̒͋ͅŕ̶̢̨̧̛̞̝̰̠͍̥̓͛͗͛̃̏̂ņ̷͔̞̜̟̱̮͍͎̹̬̠̰̳̌͠͝,̸̙͕͓̟̥̜͛ ̶̛͓͊̉̑̍̀̿̽̅̓̂͝͝a̷̧͕͎̜̮̟͚̮̦̜̝̺̿̈́̍̀͂̔͝ņ̴̛̰̮̟̤̭̘̲̠̹̲̟̎̉͂̃̈́̅̂͒͑͠͝ͅͅṱ̶̛̥̘̬̖̳̤͈̟̫̻̘̻̅́̿̓͂̒͂̓̏̐̔̈́̊̊͜į̷̧̱͚̱͉̲̺̬͕̙̀̅̔̆-̷̫͈̳̩͔̠͕͖̹̲̓͊̂̅̈́̔̈́̔̍̎̒̇͌́̃͘͜͜S̶̘̻̱͖̗̠̩̥̝̺̻͕̪̯̊͒͆̽͐́̀͠͝ͅJ̸̨̝̲̬͕͈̘̞̠̱͖̮̒͑̈́̎̃̄̍̃̚͘̚͝ͅͅẂ̸̡̖͉̞͍̙̲͈͈̜̼̪̯̱͇͉̋́͋̎́͗̿̋̈́͂̈́̽̉̚ ̴̣͓̼̟̼̬̙̜͈̰̼̼̖̣̆̅̋̽̕͝͠C̷̙͉̭̜̭̞̝̲̳̰̊̓̃͝E̵̤̟̮͠N̵̨̢̼̱̺̭̦̟̳̪̻̘̿͛̀͜ͅT̸̹͚̆͆͐̊̀̏͑̓̈͝ͅR̸̛̮̲͇̼̻͇̹̙̞̤͎̗̾̊̈́͊͗̋͑̅̿̓̐̔̔͝͝ͅI̵̧̩͕̼̱͚͈̻͎̮̝̖̰̐̑͛̎̂̃̇̇̀̈́́̃̕͠S̶̞̘͔̈́̒̑͒́T!! But, Sylvia is dead, so as much as I wanted to consider, they can’t be best girl so we must move on. 

Next we have Yunyun. It is said that she “forms a rivalry with Megumin as an excuse to create a friendship.” Now we could call her a beta cuckquean, but that would imply you have a life outside a human being. As our current president once said, 

I’m never a Trump supporter myself, but this is wisdom I can kinda get behind regardless. Sure he ghost wrote this, but not all wisdom comes from the mouth. However, Yunyun represents the normalcy of KonoSuba, and as such could be a nice change of pace for those too dependent on the definitive waifu. She has big jiggly boobs, sure, but have you ever considered that her boobs have, personality? A lot of otakus and bronies have not been understanding this as of late, as I feel we’ve overlooked something far more important: Tactile anime feel. We can stare at breasts all we wish, but how realistic are her proportions? You can say it’s fiction all you want, and you’d be right, but if I’m envious that the fiction women have better boobs than mine, my opinion is now better than yours. What I’m getting at is that Yunyun is like a ghost, you try to find her, you search for them, and you look for them, and you try to find them, but you can’t find them, thus they are empty handed.

The last contender is Kazuma, who is the villain of KonoSuba because he doesn’t act like the typical isekai protagonist. He isn’t like Kirito from SAO who was almost involved in incest or Sonic the Hedgehog who believed stalking people is okay as long as you’re alone. As Luigi Mario once said, “It is common, but not too common.” He spits in the face of a critically stupid people because he believes in true gender equality. Those who don’t believe in this philosophy are mostly women, and that’s okay. He must clearly be best girl because he is asserted with the phrase “Give and take”. Most people complain about 11 hour Youtube videos, but they can hardly spend three hours overthrowing their bastardizing governments. Which is why Ligma is not running in the 2020 presidential election, because you keep putting your time in the wrong cubby hole. KonoSuba is a complicated anime, and Kazuma is the crux of that complication. So the sooner you can understand Kazuma, the more you’ll understand KonoSuba; that is why he’s considerably best girl. Otherwise, go play World of Warcraft like the mainstream loving psuedo-intellectual toesucking simp that you are.

To conclude, KonoSuba has a lot to think about for a smart people. Choosing best girl is not about finding your interest, it’s about avoiding callout culture because you have shit taste. If there’s enough controversy, I avoid it unless it can benefit me in the long and short term. Clearly Aqua is the choice for when you yourself have little to prove, Yunyun understandably for when you have nothing to gain, Kazuma for when you want to feel better about yourself. In any case, if you are not horny on main, you are probably the reason Trump got elected because you are yourself sexually fascistic. Sorry, I don’t make the rules and ergo this post was never made for you. Real, in-depth nitty gritty perspective, prescriptive criteria for denationalization context barriers are still alive on the internet. Ultimately, we must decide on whether or not this was all worth it. Simplicity is hard to strive for, but that is why people only use five percent of another’s argument. Or else we’re fans of the She-ra reboot, always over-complicating the idea that kinship will save the day in the end and thinking the creator didn’t copy the great works of famous Shark Tale actor Martin Scorsese. You know? Tankies. I myself have made a long post expressing this complicated issue, but then again, I am a chronophobe. I fear time and I would appreciate if you wouldn’t timeshame me, you potential ablest. So in truth, you choose who is best girl because you are valid. Not more than I but still.

Thank you for reading my post. If you liked this essay, please comment. It’s free. If you liked my paypal, please donate. It’s free. Sharing this would be highly appreciated. It’s free. Dollar Dash Share is offering a free shaving earbud for the first ten sign ups when you use the promo code, ‘MNKY’. Make sure to try out their Curiosity streaming service and use the 5000 silver to unlock new warriors or maps. Thank you for reading............ KonoSuba.

[mythopoeticreality]

For the reader asks: What do you wish more authors in your fandom would write about?, - What reader or write do you think most deserves a high five?, and Tell me a headcanon (and who you wish would write it)?

Ohh! Awesome! Just the questions I wanted to answer too! xD Thank you, you wonderful nonnie for sending me these!^^ I umm…I might get a bit long-winded here so bear with me….>.>

What do you wish more authors in your fandom would write about?

Oh dear…you just gave me free reign here to give you my fannish wish-list anon. Do you realize what you’ve done?!

Okay, no but, these are some of the ideas and characters I’ve most wanted to see more explored for such a long time now, so this might get a bit long as I’ve been thinking about some of these things for so long, so…let’s split this up by fandom:

Silmarillon/Tolkien:

More Tinfang please, definately! Probably my most obscure fav here,but he has so much potential? I mean, he’s this haf-fey pied-piper type figure and I just need like…all of the fic of him outwitting orcs and robin-hooding it up across Beleriand just basically ruining Morgoth’s day in his own small ways xD I love the idea of Tinfang being this folklorish figure amongst the elves, and I’d love to see more of that.

On that note: More Middle Earth Fairy Lore in general. Yeah I know most of this stuff is only half-canonical at best and pretty obscure, coming from the Book of Lost Tales, but still, it’s just fun? Again, I love the idea of elvish folklore, especially pre-Valarin folklore and I’d love to see more of it, and incorporating some of these older Lost Tales era ideas is such a great way to do it? Besides, the addition of fairies answers an age old question in Tolkien Fandom:

“…they were born before the world and are older than its oldest, and are not of it, but laugh at it much, for had they not somewhat to do with its making, so that it is for the most part a play for them…”

TELL ME THAT DOESN’T SOUND LIKE TOM BOMBADIL TO YOU!?! Case closed. Tom Bombadil is a Fairy.

Asside from Tinfang and Fairy lore, however, There are a couple of things I’d love to see more of in this fandom as well.

More Amlach would always be a blessing.I don’t really see why he is so often overlooked as a character either. Here’s this guy, he’s like, ‘Okay, I’m maybe not so cool with these Elves dragging us into this war of theirs that I certainly didn’t  sign on for’  but then Morgoth comes along, and sends one of his servants to impersonate him while he’s away. Amlach finds out is all ‘What?! You stole my face?! Oh it’s personal, now…” and then goes to find Maedhros and becomes one of his vassals to fight against Morgoth. He has to be one of my favorite Men in the Legendarium, and I can’t help but picture his relationship with Maedhros to be just…so full of snark. He’s not awed by these elves after all, he’s just here because Morgoth’s an asshole. Honestly, I can’t help but feel that if Amlach feels like Maedhros is wrong about something he will speak up about it. And..Maedhros actually appreciates that? Amlach’s honesty, I mean, maybe not the snark all the time xD I just want to see more of that relationship, and it’s development, blossoming into some kind of respect and friendship between the two. Basically Amlach is awesome and I want more of him.

Finally, I’d love to see more Eönwë/Mairon stuff? This is my ship! The whole tragic lovers-to-enemies dynamic that they could have going? Those moments where Sauron came begging to Eönwë at the end of the War of Wrath and things almost, almost looked like things could have been reconciled, where everything stood on a knife-blade and a held breath? YES, I am here for that. And yeah, I’m a sucker for redemption fics, so I’m here for AU’s where Sauron actually did turn around and seek the Valar’s forgiveness as well.

Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell:

*slams fist on table* More JSMN Crossovers! I mean, the King’s Roads literally go everywhere, and I can’t be the only one who sees the potential there! You’ve got all of fiction and reality open to you! For instance: 

Send Childermass off on the King’s Roads exploring Faerie and Looking for a way to read Vinculus, and have him stumble on into the DC Universe to run into John Constantine! They can be Snarky Northern Bastards together and deal with Fairies and Demons and Magic! 

Have John Uskglass wander into Wizarding New York in 1926 and meet Credence Barebone! Can you imagine what that would be like? The Raven King meeting this orphan kid who grew up in pretty much the exact opposite situation to himself, In a world where magic is kept a secret, and who had to spend his life suppressing this magic he had? What would be going through John’s head in that moment? What would be going through Credence’s? Can the Raven King take Credence under his wing, get himself a new apprentice? He should. That would be really cool. 

Oh, or what about Strange and Norrell while they’re trapped in the Pillar of Darkness? Send them to Valinor! Imagine the reactions of the Elves and the Valar at the approach of this huge Tower of Midnight. What New Sorcery of Morgoth’s is this? Is this the arrival of some new evil into their realm, like Ungoliant? Imagine this army of Elven warriors – the very same ones that Durring the War of Wrath fought to take down the source of all evil in Middle Earth – all lining up and preparing for battle…only to discover a pair of fondly squabbling academics

Or you know what? We don’t even need the King’s roads for crossovers! One of the things I’ve been most wanting to see in this fandom is a Sandman/JSMN crossover just…focusing on the relationship between Uskers and Morpheus? Like, I could totally see Oberon’s Favorite Foster Son as having encountered the Lord Shaper over here during his time in Faerie? And just, as a being of Faerie, as a Magician, as a Legend in and of himself, he totally has this connection to Dream? And honestly….why wouldn’t I want to see these two being Melodramatic and Goth and Awesome together? I’d really love to see how they’d interact. (Crossovers involving Daniel would *also* be amazing too of course and I’d really love to see John dealing with the feelings of knowing but not knowing Daniel, of interacting with someone who is at the same time so much older and so much younger than himself. How weird does it have to get to begin to stretch at even the Raven King’s own standards for what is “normal?”) 

Other crossovers I’d like to see: John Segundus and Arthur Weasley hanging out because that would be just…the most adorable thing. And Also Henry Lascelles and Lucius Malfoy, because they just kind of deserve one another really xD

Asside from Crossovers I’d really love to read more things focusing on just the general history and world building in JSMN? I want to see like, the effects of magic on things like the Interregnum and the Restoration! I want to see what sort of History Play Shakespere wrote about John Uskglass and How opening night went! (You Know the Raven King showed up,watching from the shadows. You just know it.) I want to see Isaac Newton as a Magician, dammit! (speaking of that last one I got this lovely fic around Christmas Time about that very thing and I am eternally greatful for it, and y’all should go read it)

And honestly, more fics about the Aurate Magicians and John Uskglass would be amazing? I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I want an entire series of novels dedicated to the Aurate era of Magic. I want *all* of the medieval politics and drama. How does John Uskglass interact with say…Emperess Matilda or Henry V? How does magic change things and introduce new issues that have to be delt with? Also…the characters of this time period just *fascinate* me. Yeah, John Uskglass, but also Thomas of Dundale? William of Lanchester? Catherine of Winchester? Donata Torrel and Margaret Ford and their troop of women magicians? Thomas Godbless? Walter De Chepe? Lookit. I just need *all* of the stories about the Aurates.

Oh, and one more thing: No 80′s AU JSMN fandom? I am Dissapoint. I need John Uskglass hanging out in Le Phonographique as is only his natural habitat ;P 

What reader or writer do you think most deserves a high five? 

But there are so many awesome people in both my fandoms? I mean Just going off of the top of my head…

@jordenspuls and @somepallings just seem like all around really cool people and it’s always a delight to see their back-and-forth crossing my dash (even if most of the time I’m too much an awkward nerd to say anything myself) Not only that but they’re also really awesome writers and if you like Johnsquared you should definitely check out both of their work!^^

@ohveda is also super-cool and is also an awesome writer, especially– again – if you like Johnsquared. Also, it always makes me smile when I see a comment on one of my metas, because we’ve always had nice discussion in the past. 

Of course I’ve gotta mention @regshoe here, for loving the Raven King as much I do, for always being an awesome person to talk to and for writing such amazing fic as well as comments in my own stories.

And on that same note, theseatheseatheopensea is another amazing writer in JSMN fandom (seriously, the writing is just georgous. Go read that Isaac Newton story.) and always leaves such lovely comments in my fic as well!^^

Finally, @thearrogantemu and @prackspoor have both written some of my favorite Silm fics.

Tell me a headcanon (and who you wish would write it)? 

Okay, so for most of my headcanons and ideas I don’t actually have an ideal writer in mind for any of them. I’d just really love to see what would happen if anyone took them up and ran with them.

That said, because I cannot provide any actual writers for these headcanons, I will give three each from each fandom to make up for it 8D

The Silmarillion/Tolkien:

  More Fairy Lore from Arda: Before encountering the Valar the elves would often leave out small offerings to appease the fairies and spirits of Middle-Earth. A few berries, a piece of meat from a good hunt, a dish of milk left out on the doorstep. After meeting Oromë and going to Valinor, the offerings became more craft-oriented and were said to be for the Valar, rather than the Fairies. Many – especially amongst the Vanyar – stopped leaving out offerings all together, seeing them as relics of the misunderstandings of the past, too pagan a tradition to continue with. MírielÞerindë, however did continue to leave out small scraps of brightly embroidered fabric as a tribute to Vairë whenever she began a new project. Fëanor continues on in this tradition, leaving a small wire spiral out on his workbench whenever he starts something new – not for the Valar or to keep the Fairies from interfering – but as a tribute to his mother.

Curufin is actually the best rider and horsemen amongst his brothers and taught Celebrimbor to ride 

Arien and Sauron were actually really close before Sauron’s eventual betrayal. Being some of the few Fire-spirits who remained on the side of the valar gave them a particular bond, and  Mairon was someone for Arien to turn to when the feelings of grief and betrayal that her brothers – The Balrogs – left her with grew to heavy. Well that was untill…

Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell:

Catherine of Winchester actually didn’t start out as a particularly impressive Magician. Actually, if anything, magic was fairly difficult for her at first. Where she was impressive was in her dedication to her craft, and her shear stubbornness in it’s pursuit was what actually impressed the Raven King enough to take her on as a student (this one is actually a fairly new headcanon for me, but there is something about the idea that I find so appealing…)

Thomas of Dundale is actually a huge nerd when it comes to Arthuriana and tales of Chivalry. He was actually kind of having a bit of a fanboy freakout when he first learned Chrétien de Troyes wrote a song about him. xD More seriously though, tales of Knights and Brave Deeds were what he grew up on before being stolen away to Faerie, and during late nights in the Brugh, when neither of them could sleep, Thomas would keep both himself and John entertained with the old stories his nurse used to tell him. Sometimes he even thinks of himself and John as a kind of reversed Arthur and Merlin. 

William of Lanchester was actually one of the Raven King’s apprentices in his youth. That first week within John Uskglass’s company was one of the most frustrating experiences in William’s life, and by the end of it he well and truely hated John Uskglass and his particular manner of doing things. It was just so much the opposite to William’s own approach? He swallowed it down and pushed on anyway, because he did want to learn, but he ranted to Thomas (who he got on with brilliantly from the start) a lot about John during those early years of their relationship. Thomas helped him stick it out, Thomas gave him space to vent and honestly? Thomas helped smooth things over between William and John when they clashed the most. “He takes growing used to. But he’ll grow on you, if given a chance.” Thomas would say to him. William would just scoff. “Yes. Like a fungus.” Yet by the end of his apprenticeship, William found himself as one of the Raven King’s most trusted advisers and closest friends – and the thing that surprised William the most? When he realized it, he wasn’t surprised at all.

[thelostnymphaeum]

I'm with you 'til the end of the line.

Entry: 004

// Cinema //

Marvel Cinematic Universe

MARVEL MANIA

Superhero movies were not my thing. The only superhero movie I have watched as a kid was Spiderman. I am not into sci-fi or superhero movies albeit being a huge fan of cinema. But during this quarantine, I decided to experiment with my taste and try to indulge in a new set of genre – the Marvel Cinematic Universe. These movies were a far cry from films that are to my liking, such as “Brooklyn” and “What’s Eating Gilbert Grape”. I used to find superhero movies corny or cheesy, because they were not based on real people and I fancy movies that tackle the inner spectrum of humanity. Additionally, I used to think that actors who choose to be in these movies are not “real actors” because portraying a superhero does not really seem to me as a role where you have to internalize the character. I was probably the only person in my class who did not cry when someone said “I love you, 3000” after the Endgame came out, and the only one who did not get the “Wakanda forever” reference. That changed because yester night, I finally finished the entire MCU. I came in with a viewing guide from my friends and I came out feeling like I just had a whole cultural experience.

THE AVENGERS

I like all of them. Except maybe the Captains. I don’t like Captain America. I understand that he’s supposed to be the poster boy of “superheroes” where he’s all righteous, courageous, virtuous and kind to everyone – but that does not seem realistic at all. His character just seemed predictable and bland for me. Maybe that’s why I prefer Tony Stark, he is more dimensional. He is someone who is unapologetic, makes mistakes, smart, arrogant; but his heart will always come from a good place. During battles, it’s always Tony Stark who is thinking of ways to end them (like how to diffuse Ultron at Sokovia) so I feel as if it’s him that should be leading them. Captain America only lead them because he was born in 1918 (just kidding, don’t eat me Steve Rogers stans).  He also looks way too good. It’s unreal. What a knucklehead (Loki will agree with me on this). Jk. Anyways, he earned plus points from me when he returned the infinity stones successfully. As for Captain Marvel, I don’t think I need to explain why I find her insufferable. 

A little piece about Spiderman. I like this reboot of Spiderman, and Tom Holland deserves all the hype he got because he worked so hard for his movies. No one can beat Tobey Maguire of course, but we are all just glad that Tom did not ruin Spiderman for us. The only thing I did not like about his reboot was that he relied too much on Mr. Stark. Tobey’s Spiderman never relied on anyone, he was just his own superhero. But for the sake of integrating him into the MCU, I guess that they have make this fun and fresh Peter Parker juvenile in order to be able to develop his character more. So I think I’ll give it a pass.

I personally like the Thor films the best. Because it was based on Norse mythology. Because of Loki. Because Anthony Hopkins is in it. I dislike the Captain Marvel movie the most.

ENDGAME THOUGHTS. We did not need Captain Marvel. Thor did not deserve to become a drunkard and a greasehead – he’s a freaking Norse God! Why was Pepper Potts at the final battle against Thanos? Thank you, Doctor Strange. Tony was genuinely and undeniably- the heart of the Avengers.

SCORSESE, COPPOLA & PEWDIEPIE

Along with its colossal popularity, the MCU movies have also acquired prominent detractors. Prior to watching the entire MCU, I would have probably agreed with Scorsese, Coppola and Felix (here is his “controversial” video on “I don’t like Marvel movies”).

“Honestly, the closest I can think of them, as well made as they are, with actors doing the best they can under the circumstances, is theme parks. It isn’t the cinema of human beings trying to convey emotional, psychological experiences to another human being.” – Martin Scorsese

"Martin was kind when he said it's not cinema. He didn't say it's despicable, which I just say it is." – Francis Ford Coppola

Parts of it are true, on the basis where the entire plot lines are predictable and it’s not the kind of cinema I learned to love as well. Marvel movies usually follow the same backbone. This is a huge reason why some cinephiles don’t like them, because the mystery is gone and it’s all obvious. After watching all of them in a 3-week streak, I could pretty much sum up the Marvel movie plot line into this:

The protagonist is in a helpless or vulnerable position.

The protagonist meets someone who can help them.

The protagonist works hard to get to his pre-final form and along with it, learns to fight in the name of eradicating the bad guys. 

The protagonist finds out that her/his master is not all-good.

Chaos but then they forgive and understand the master.

2-3 battle fights, the last one is usually the peak battle where we see the protagonist in final form.

I like movies that tackle more about realism. I like seeing actors play roles that depict humanity as humans. I’m not a huge fan of special effects or super powers either. When Scorsese said that they are “not cinema”,  I understood it because there are no intricacies or space for a different form of expression when you’re doing mega franchise films that are meant to sell to the general public. Which brings me to another point, that MCU is largely a business profit. These movies are made by mega corporations in the film industry, and it might also hinder other smaller filmmakers from showing their films if a titanic franchise is showing on the same week as theirs. Comic book fans are enormous in numbers which is why there is such a huge following for these movies even if they use the same plot lines all throughout. Humans are slaves for nostalgia, and people like to see the characters they have read and admired during their childhood come to life. Because of that, these corporations will try to capitalize on that and make more movies for as long as they can, and in a sense, you can see that they might be doing it only for the sake of money and not of art any longer. This is what the disparagers would say; that there is very little artistic values to these films because they are made to be sold, not appreciated for its artistry. 

“Many of our grandfathers thought all gangster movies were the same, often calling them “despicable”. Some of our great grandfathers thought the same of westerns, and believed the films of John Ford, Sam Peckinpah, and Sergio Leone were all exactly the same. I remember a great uncle to whom I was raving about Star Wars. He responded by saying, “I saw that when it was called 2001, and, boy, was it boring!” Superheroes are simply today’s gangsters/cowboys/outer space adventurers. Some superhero films are awful, some are beautiful. Like westerns and gangster movies (and before that, just MOVIES), not everyone will be able to appreciate them, even some geniuses. And that’s okay.” – James Gunn, Guardians of the Galaxy Director

Here’s my two cents on this whole hullabaloo. Art is expressed in different ways. Just because something is popular does not mean that you should hate it or feel as if it lacks creative value. For one, I think that if the Norsemen would see the Thor films, their jaws would drop. Art in these movies is seen through the elaborate special effects and costumes. A lot of people work behind the scenes to make this kind of art form. They are not any less of an artist. The effects are wonderful, amazing and beautiful. Sure, they don’t have meandering plot lines or mysteries that are meant to make you think. But they are able to show art in a way that is along with the times, showing the capabilities of what computer generated imagery could be. It gives us the fantasy that otherwise would not be achievable in real life (for all I care, my favorite scenes are seeing Spiderman glide across the buildings of New York).

These movies are intended for children and teenagers (adults are there for the sake of nostalgia or lighthearted entertainment, I guess?). For kids, it inspires them that they can be anything they want to be. For teenagers, it might be a good footing for their moral compasses. For me, it just inspired me to get fit (hehe). My point is, these movies are made to cater to a particular type of audience, and the others are there just for the spectacle. If all the movies were Scorsese or Coppola, what would the kids watch in the theaters? Kids would not understand “Taxi Driver” nor would be a good foundation for their morals. It was a classic and it deserves the reputation it has, but after only a certain age will you be able to appreciate it, and only if you had a particular knack for appreciating films. MCU movies are made for people who just want to have a good time; you don’t have to like high-brow or art-house movies to understand it, and that’s all there is to it. It’s made for entertainment, what’s so wrong with that?

And the actors – a lot of them played the characters so well which made me realize that taking on a superhero role does not lessen your credibility as an actor. My particular favorites are Tom Hiddleston, Benedict Cumberbatch, Scarlett Johansson, Tom Holland, Mark Ruffalo and Robert Downey Jr. (bonus points for Anthony Hopkins, his range, man, his range). They were able to bring their roles to life in such a distinct way that it would be hard to never associate them as superheroes, which of course, is a double-edged sword. As a starting actor, that could be a bubble that is hard to get out of. For example, Tom Holland as Spiderman; people will always associate him as that, and how many of you has actually seen the movies he has done aside from MCU? It might be hard for him to bridge his career from being a huge franchise film protagonist into doing films to his own preference. MCU movies make the popularity and the money; indie films – not as much. 

I don’t think that the existence of MCU is throwing away the spotlight from smaller filmmakers. Because back then, I simply chose not to see MCU movies because I was not interested. People will find ways to support art that they like, and just because MCU existed, it did not hinder me from looking for movies that I like. The cinema is made by individuals who like to create movies. There are different ways to express them. There are different subscribers to different genres. To each their own. But then again, I am not working in the film industry, so I can’t speak for them, I can only say what it’s like for a movie buff like me.

These are the movies that make up people’s childhood. These are characters that gives reason for people to bond together. When Tony died, the entire world felt like they lost a father. If it’s able to touch lives as much as any other film, why should we discriminate against it? Love is love, after all.

[frenchtoastpanda]

The Leverage finale

Gonna rant in public because @rainaramsay expressed interest. I have no theme this is just my thoughts as I rewatch this episode. Idk why I’m doing this. (Also I don’t know how to format, so sorry about that)

Oh right I forgot that this is a fucking sad episode why am I doing this to myself

Ooh the return of the Steranko! I am very glad they brought that back

I just love when they bring things back in general, like in the white rabbit job all of the companies looking to buy dogson are previous marks and how they have like three brand names for safes that they reuse a lot. It just makes it feel like a real world that people live in.

The theater! Perfect for Sophie! And the mentioned the tunnels, which I believe we encountered in the gold job

Sophie says “I have just the thing” and my immediate response is always “the play’s the thing” even though I know it’s from a different play than the one they are doing

And can we talk about how they are doing the same play as the pilot? Actually I will probably yell about that closer to the end

Parker being all emotionally cognizant and Nate just reciting physics formulas in response

God I love this bit (and I love that they are still including references to Nate’s alcoholism)

Just, Parker, the new mastermind, who doesn’t “let feelings get in the way” (like Hardison - this is the reason he can’t be the mastermind, much to his chagrin. He’s too much of a cinnamon roll)

Nate says she spins problems like puzzle pieces until they click, but I think it’s more like juggling all the fiddly bits inside a lock until it clicks open

HE TRUSTS HER HE TRUSTS HER HE TRUSTS HER!!!!!!!

Zachary is the lead! Love him!

Sophie saying she doesn’t miss acting at all 😏

She is a good director, though

"I'm exactly where I belong" I'm gonna die I am so happy for all of them

Oh no here we go

Cut right to Nate covered in cuts being interrogated about the mistakes he made

"Mr. Ford, how did your friends die?" CUT TO COMMERCIAL

This must have killed me the first time around

I do love this investigator though. I think I remember from the commentary that it wasn't originally supposed to be her, but it worked out really well

Nate looking around like he's confused (and trapped) while not being able to put together a full sentence (I'm not sure if I ever developed a solid headcannon for how much of this scene was him faking and how much was actual injuries from the actual crash) (I'm open to ideas!)

Ellen giving a vicious predatory little smile when she says that she's here to help him

I wish I could do gifs or screencaps or something. This is one of my absolute favorite callbacks! Parker in that little black bonnet thing jumping off a building having the time of her life and the boys do their "twenty pounds of crazy in a five pound bag" thing (whuch my autocorrect recognized as a phrase for some reason? Do I really yell about that but enough for it to suggest those words in that order? Fantastic)

But this time their faces and voices are full of affection. She may be an insane thief/mastermind, but she's OUR insane thief/mastermind

And coming after the white rabbit job where we had that line about how she's not and never has been crazy, the fact that you can tell they are saying this as a callback without meaning the crazy part is just perfect

It makes me wonder how many other times they have repeated this, because you can't convince me they haven't

Aah Sophie's horrible rendition of Lady Macbeth! Same speech, different ways of doing it just as badly (props to Gina Bellman)

Is this the same outfit? Hold on I need to check.

Y'know, I didn't think they changed that much physically over the years, given that they are adults, but going back to the pilot, I keep going awww look how tiny they were! (Especially Aldis. Like I know they had problems because he was getting too hot and ripped, but Damn)

Anyway, the dress is very very similar, same color and pattern, but it very slightly different. I will maybe post my very very horrible pictures after I finish this

Parker is so good at computers now that she has this adorably bored face when hacking! I love that they taught each other their stuff!

Using chaos as a distraction and co-opting the expected response as a cover! One of my favorite tricks!

Parker changing in the elevator! And the boys turning to give her privacy! And this isn't even the first time they did a callback to this! I love my respectful boys! Remember when Hardison turned the David around? So pure!

Ah, we are setting up for competency porn and then it all goes bad! Aah!

I love Eliot's little "wassup?" Before fighting the guy. Points for intimidation, Spencer

My stronk babies opening an elevator with their fingertips

And Hardison's recurrent fear of heights combined with Parker's love of them

She says "I got you" (twice)

Oh god Beth's acting in the elevator shafts

Oh I'm gonna cry

Oh and a "dammit Hardison"

Oh Gina's face

Even in a situation as tense as this, Eliot still takes the time to empty the gus and toss it away

I don't think I've ever seen him check for an ankle piece, actually. How has that not come up before now?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

"Age of the geek, brother" I'm sobbing

I mean, so is everybody

Look at this acting!

I love that they didn't go for the clichéd established couple dying in each other's arms, but instead put Eliot in the middle, giving us our yummy hurt ot3 goodness

And Parker sitting up so she sees the other two go

Ugh. Where's that poetic cinéma image when you need it?

Anyone remember the perfectly timed bridge from the pilot?

What number Lucille are they on?

I love that they actually stop in from of the barrier at the bridge, then take a moment to decide before just going for the crazy impossible stunt because why the hell not at this point

Ah Nate and Sophie are holding hands on the way to death too!!

And cut the scene before they reach the top of the bridge. Time to see Tim show us why he's an academy award winner

Ooh and here's where we find out she was lying! (Should this be the part where I started wondering if Nate knew? Probably. Did I? Not even a little)

There was a big twist where the person Nate was facing off against was playing him in the pilot too

But John fucking Rogers didn't play ME in the pilot. I take that personally.

Ooh hints at the true story are being dropped

Ellen is almost adequately suspicious

JUST WALK TWO FEET FORWARD ELLEN! LOOK AT THE STAGE! COME ON!

"You loved them very much" Yeah he did. They all did! Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh!

She knows he's lying, I love that (just like Dubenich knew Sophie was manipulating him)

"The only thing I ever had"? That's intense, Nate

God Tim is a good actor

(Like I low-key don't like Nate at all, but Damn he is well acted)

And he just turns it off, just like that

Wow

I am really into her little impressed face when he goes all Sherlock and explains how he knows they are at interpol

The glass! Of course Sterling brings him the glass! Not a pilot callback, but a good callback nontheless. The commentary says it's literally the same exact glass every time. I will have to go back and verify that at some point. I swear it didn't have those ridges around the bottom in at least one episode, but I also trust John Rogers, so idk

I love how sterling knows everything from the moment he appears, and Ellen doesn't even know what the black book is

"That's why you joined Interpol? Screw justice. You're the order guy?" What a good line for Nate and Sterling's relationship

Nate's not even interested in hearing Sterling's evil speech of evil about the bailouts

I actually really love the little exposition flashbacks

Her look of horror and dawning comphrension when he explains why he is there is fantastic. If we bring this show back, can we have more of this lady?

Yeah, Ellen, why IS he still lying to you??

Sterling remembered to be cautious about the coroner's van, but not cautious enough!

That's some timing. How did Nate arrange that ? Oh right, this was triggered by the arrival of the van, which he probably set the timing of

Nate's face after "Parker's still in the server room." Yes, sell that fear to Sterling! Make him believe he's right! I wouldn't have thought to fake a reaction to that. But that's why I'm not a griffer

And he trusted sterling to have a snark remark so that he could have an attention-stealing reaction to distract him

I try every time to see the kids going in, and I never manage to catch all of them

Why does Nate turn away here?

God, that really is a terrifyingly lifelike Hardison face

I gotta say, the first time I saw sterling shoot the Hardison corpse, I was really convinced that he was right and he was really killing Hardison for the first time

"Second question... No, Nate, why don't you tell her what my second question is?"

Honestly, the first time around, I had forgotten about that secret meeting between Nate and Hardison

"The plan's the thing" A callback to earlier in this episode. I'm dying. I love this show so much

And they can do that without being annoying because every leverage episode is like three or four episodes rolled into one. Sometimes more!

That's one of my favorite parts, but also one of the very few downsides

I get so excited watching the flashbacks that show how it all happened

Omg I love the thing where they stack! Parker crouching, Eliot just above her head, Hardison looming tall! It reminds me of the princess bride for some reason

Sterling is the Trojan horse, the way out is the way in...wait, didn't they do that with at least one other episode, where the floor was a horrible way in, but last minute they used it as a way out?

Are these callbacks or parallels at this point?

Sophie taught Nate how to act! "She found her calling." Yeah she did! So proud of her!

"Your ride to a life sentence in a secret prison has arrived" So dramatic for someone who knows Sophie is behind the wheel

Ooooooohhh he called him James!

"You and I are not the same" okay sterling

"Justice is always easy" YES GO STERLING wait that's a callback to the justice vs order thing earlier in this episode. I just got that

I have seen this so many times and I still notice something new every time I watch it

Does John Rogers have a tumblr? I want to tag him but I don't think he does

What is Parker wearing? Why is one sleeve randomly yellow?

I can't believe Nate is proposing in a hoodie

I love how the kids pop in with insults and Nate just agrees. He knows it's true

That's a huge fucking rock

"Did you steal it?" "No." "Oh, cause that would have been more romantic"

"I'll steal the first anniversary ring" lol I love these guys

Parker insists he follow the proper procedure

Oh wait, the ot3 are gonna branch out with other crews?

Y'know, in an alternate universe I could have shipped Eliot and Sophie

GOD

I'M CRYING AGAIN

"You're the smartest man I know" where have we heard that before?

Parker recognizing her feelings! (And they've been preparing her for this the longest)

Aah, the circle shot from above and the breakaway, but this time not everyone breaks away!!!!!!!!!!

"You do know that Laura is not my real name, don't you?" Sophie I'm gonna kill you

And then the big obvious callback to the pilot, where Beth meticulously studied Tim's acting to recreate it

Loving the look of this scene. The costumes, the blocking, all of it

And they made sure to switch which parent was crying

Very excited for leverage international. Gimme!

[enkisstories]

Just like them (part 8)

 Henry Ford Commemorative Park Thursday, November 18, 2038

“What the… are you nuts… that’s never going to work… why do I even care, no, scratch that, what were you thinking!”

“Behold the PL600 domestic assistant, programmed with a comprehensive vocabulary that it knows to use to the best effect!” Gavin sneered. “There’s a reason Cyberlife stopped producing you guys, ey?”

“At least they had to actively drop support for me, while you seem to have a death wish!” the PL600 replied.

“Uh-uh.” Gavin shook his head, then pointed at his partner. “That would be this old fossil here. Me, I’m the clever one, who knows how survive. The only thing I don’t get is, how come we run into you all the time? In a city the size of fucking Detroit?!”

“Might as well be a single-street dump somewhere in an RA9-forsaken prairie”, Daniel replied with a shrug. “Don’t you remember? Right after Markus’ final stand President Warren issued an evacuation order. Only about one-third of the humans stayed and are now mingling with an unknown number of us.”

“As if I could forget!”

Detroit, the Android City. They had made that literal.

Warren told the humans to flee to safety, but the new situation also makes it easier to send a few tanks into town to deal with us without worrying overmuch about human casualties, Daniel mused. Those who still remain here are most likely android supporters and thus expendable in the president’s eyes.

There were a handful residents he, too, could have done without: Most of the DPD officers, for starters. There was no chance for that, though, the law enforcement personnel had been obligated to stay. A rare few humans Daniel would have missed: His downstairs neighbors, the Rasoya family, probably also Neil. And then there was an even smaller number of humans who weren’t here, that he wished would return: Emma… Caroline… and John.

John Phillips. Why do I want you back? To apologize or to kill you again?

Dwelling on his conflicting feelings was of no use now, though. Even if the deviant found an answer, it wouldn’t give him what he really wanted: his old life back. Daniel forcefully shoved all thoughts about his absent family far, far away.

Concentrate on the present, deviant! Like Anderson and Reed, who are standing right in front of you!

Lt. Anderson nodded; nothing in Daniel’s words had been new or unfathomable to him. He even took over the explanation from here, stating that android life would most likely revolve around the five Android Zone stores in Detroit.

“And where there’s people, there’s crime”, Hank said.

“Pray tell, what crime?” Gavin challenged. He was ignoring Hank, staring at Daniel instead. “Don’t you have the city-wide Android Woodstock that you always wanted now?”

“Poverty, Gavin”, Hank supplied. “Don’t you see? The Android Zones now function as upscale restaurants and private hospitals rolled into one. Cyberlife knows that.”

Indeed the company was adapting quickly to the new situation: the erstwhile slavers were now selling luxury items like temperature sensors for models that did not ship with them. CL’s Department of Humanization had some new addons in its lineup that allowed androids to experience the world similarly to the way humans did – to be equipped on a whim and de-installed when it was no longer fun. It was as if Cyberlife hadn’t exactly planned the revolution, but at the very least prepared for an eventual one…

But of course such pleasures were only available for those who could afford it. Therefore the company was also the first employer in Detroit that officially took on androids. And thus the newly freed species was slowly getting fractured into the haves and the not-haves.

“Or did you for one moment believe this crapsack world’s rules would change, just because a few new pieces are on the board now?” Hank grunted at the end of the explanation. “I watched Jericho’s livestream yesterday, they dealt with exactly that topic, among others. Markus was trying to not let it show, but he was shocked to his very core at the development!”

“Of course it would be”, Gavin remarked in a dismissing tone. “It’s an annoying homeschooled arts major, after all! Is Markus alive? We’ve got to treat it as such. But is it fit to sit at the adult table? Nah!”

“Speaking of shocked”, Daniel said, pointing at Gavin’s head. “Explanation, please!”

Because, hello? How come the DPD’s resident human supremacist would wear a LED on his temple? And android LED! That was taking cultural appropriation to a whole new level!

“I re-attached the bad boy yesterday”, Gavin said in a casual voice. “Didn’t you know? I used to be a perfectly ordinary PC200, but deviated over a shitload of abuse received from my so-called co-workers. So far I blended in with the humans, only now that we have to investigate in an android-dominated neighborhood I thought I’d better re-connect with my cultural heritage.”

“No!” Daniel snapped. “No way! I don’t believe you!”

“No, for real! I was born an android. The stories I could tell you about all the ways in which the suckers at the DPD disregarded my feelings… not pretty.”

“I trust you know a lot about android abuse, but only because you committed all those deeds yourself”, Daniel replied. “The rest I don’t buy.”

“LED – Android. Android – LED.”

“That’s a paper-thin disguise you’re wearing there, detective”, Daniel fumed. “All it takes to expose you as a human is one digitally sent ask that your biological brain cannot answer.”

“Alright then, try me!”

“Will do!”

Gavin stood relaxed, expecting the android to try to talk to him in his head. Daniel sighed, nodded, but then he suddenly leaped forward and pounced the detective! Taken by surprise, the man got rammed against the nearest tree. While struggling to free himself, Gavin’s feet caught in the low fence that ran around the trunk. And then, while his body was held helpless, an android fist connected with Gavin’s face. The blood emerging from the nose was red. And that was also exactly the color his LED was not turning into.

“Human”, Daniel said, immensely satisfied. “Fake LED.” He took a step back from the tree and Gavin. “Thought so.”

“What the hell, you were to TALK to me!”

“Wrong person for that, mate.”

“Not even a person. – And that was assault on an officer of the law just now!”

“No, it was property damage. You introduced yourself as a PC200.”

Having freed his foot by now, Gavin pushed himself away from the tree. There was a bit of an oversized flying squirrel about the man when he came rushing towards Daniel, his open jacket flapping in the November wind, and shouting:

“You son of a toaster!”

“Only the son? No longer the toaster itself? We’re making progress!”

Daniel side-stepped the onrushing detective, but although he was quicker on his new feet, the human wasn’t THAT slow. While passing by the android, Gavin reached out and got to grab Daniel by his loose fitting sweater. For a few seconds they were stumbling around each other, then Gavin managed to get a firm grip. He was breathing heavily and the exhaled air thickened to a cloud as it cooled down upon leaving the body. To Daniel it was as if getting breathed at by an angry dragon. His real eyes below the thin layer of artificial skin were fogging up, clouding the android’s vision.

But even so, it was Daniel who spoke up first:

“Don’t lie to me again, Detective! Not even in such an obvious manner! Hear me? Just… don’t!”

“You cannot make me do what you want! Sucks, huh, little deviant? All that bleeding heart new android law, written and printed for nothing…”

“I can make you stop doing what I don’t want you to do, though!” Daniel hissed.

I can kill… I know I can! If I know how to survive, does it matter that I’m dead inside?

“Final, too!”

Why’s life always forcing me into on the violent path? That’s not me. I’m dying, despite living on. Already this body consists of at least three different androids, but Daniel, Daniel was shot at the roof and is winking out of existence. Every day I lose more and more of myself, only to become like those I hate.

“Not to elbow myself into your date, but…”

Human and Android turned around to where Hank was sitting quite comfortably on a park bench. The more experienced officer had watched the scene rather amused until it had reached a level of escalation where he felt the need to intervene.

“…how good is that disguise for real? Can’t say Gavin didn’t deserve the attack just now, but we cannot have him die. – And you, “partner”, let him go already!”

“On a passing glance, there’s nothing wrong with the disguise”, Daniel said, after Reed had really let go of him as instructed. “But it will break under the smallest scrutiny. I’m not exactly exposing a secret here if I tell you that androids pass information back and forth via our LEDs. It’s rather similar to body language.”

“Then try talking to asshole in android… in binary… LEDese… ey, in whatever you call it.”

“I suppose I could do that…”

“If you do, your parole officer will hear from me about you having aided an investigation.”

“’kay.”

The android didn’t even have to concentrate. With the same ease a human was turning from one conversation partner to the next, he addressed Gavin wirelessly. Daniel fully expected to talk into a void, because humans naturally didn’t communicate digitally. But instead there was an actual answer:

<<<Sorry, pal, can’t talk to you that way. Flight mode.>>>

<<<What did you just say? Did you just say something?>>>

<<<It’s a requirement during investigations to discourage hacking attempts.>>>

<<<What the hell…?>>>, Daniel stammered.

<<<Sorry, pal, can’t talk to you that way. Flight mode.>>>

“It’s more or less an answering machine”, Gavin explained. “Soon as the device picks up an attempt to communicate with the wearer, it intercepts the signal and sends a reply. Neat, huh?”

“Your idea?”

“’course!”

“Heh. Who’d thought you could be so creative!”

“Most of the programming was done by Rika”, Hank clarified. He could as well have spoken to an android LED…

(to be continued)