#i think i am starting to confuse myself on if this is really a spoiler ASFASDAFRA

[meamiki]

[reverse entry AU]

so glad the work week is over!

no more meetings!

what do you mean its only tuesday.

[couldbebetterforsure]

What on earth are the other routes of Jack Jeanne like??? Because I had seen so many comments and reviews say this game is super light on the romance and all that…

But I’m going through Suzu’s route and it’s literally so fucking romantic??????????

I’m over here acting like a damn blushing maiden watching Kisa and Suzu interact over the course of the whole game, and that’s only ramped up now that I’m out of the common route and into Suzu’s specific route!

[supernova41st]

Can I request tf2 mercs with a reader who is genuinely terrifying. Like there quiet, sneaky, uncanny, basically reader is kinda like the mercs very own cryptid. (Bonus points if reader is tall af<3)

Boo 🤍

A/n: Spy’s is a little short here ���� I hope you weren’t too eager to see his lol. I got a little experimental with this one, not too much tho. Also I’ll be going on another break, I know I just finished one but I’m going through an unexpected rough time rn. So sorry guys, hope you enjoy <33

Warnings: Video used may be a spoiler for s2 of scream queens, Praying is used in a humorous light

To start things off, you introduced yourself in the worst way possible. The bus that you were supposed to take got broken down so you had to find your way through the base without knowing where the entrance was. So what’d you do? Bang into a bunch of glass windows at 3am while it was RAINING. Some of the mercs were up trying to fix up the power generator and..

I saved that clip for weeks I’m so happy I have a reason to use it now

I know they’re all supposed to be big bad mercs but you scared the living FUCK out of them.

Scout

This man went running. He went all the way from the generator to the fucking bunks in the span of a minute! So what’d he do when he got to his room? He grabbed his cross necklace, got on his knees, and started PRAYING.

“Please god Jesus frickin’ Christ hear my prayers, save me-I’m sorry about all those magazines I keep under my bunk and I’m sorry that I told spy to go fuck himself when he told me I couldn’t pull bitches and I’m sorry I call girls bitches please just don’t let me friggin’ die dude!!”

He just kept chanting the same things until Miss Pauling found him cradling himself on his bed with a blanket wrapped around him.

“Scout what are you doing?”

“THERE IS A GHOST IN THE BASE.”

“Oh, you mean y/n?”

‘Hi 👁️‍🗨️👁️‍🗨️’

Yea he was pretty freaked out by you. To make it worse, you always just stare at him. He can’t remember a single moment where he looked at you and didn’t catch your tiny pupils locked onto him.

At first he’d just gently wave awkwardly while you did the same so freakishly. Eventually he decided to say something because it was scaring him, something he’ll never admit

“Yo you got a problem or somethin’, what’s with all the stares?”

“Nothing, I just like looking at you. Your structure pleases me.”

“..oh, well that’s actually-wait I thought-hold on do you really-pfft-Yeesh, I didn’t expect you out of everyone to haha.. Yknow”

Yeah he was blushing like crazy, such a straightforward compliment.

He’s still scared of you, but he uses you as his hype man every now and then. He’ll fish for compliments and WILL receive them

“Dontcha think I got some nice racks for a guy?”

“..Totally”

He could literally walk up to you and threaten to kill you and your reaction is just “yuh go for it”

If you’re freakishly tall then he calls you tree. Cuz

If you’re on the shorter side then he would just pick you up from the shoulders and kiss you on the forehead. He knows you won’t do shit, you’re literally just 🧍‍♀️

(gotg reference)

“I am hideous? :(“

“You kiddin’? You’re horrifying to look at”

Engineer

He didn’t even notice everyone else went running, he just kept on working on the electrical box. So when he stood up and saw you staring straight into the glass, he jumped a little but was mostly just confused

“What in the..”

“tap tap-Can you let me in?”

You’re lucky he didn’t go running like everyone else, you probably would’ve died from the flu if you spent another second outside in the freezing rain.

He puts a bell on you. He just had one laying around and tied it around the your wrist, it didn’t work because of how stiff your movements were so to ‘help’ you rang it against his ear.

“..”

“…..🔔🔔🔔🔔”

“GOD DAMN IT- oh, y/n”

“Sorry, the bell wasn’t ringing how you wanted it to so I rang it myself”

“Uh-huh, thanks for the warning partner”

From my experience southern people love to make conversation, but you aren’t really familiar with that. So when he tries to flirt it gets pretty awkward

“How’s it goin’ sugar, I reckon your looking quite nice today”

“👁️‍🗨️👁️‍🗨️”

“..you gonna say anythin’ back?”

“Oh, um.. I like your face.”

“Woah, alright then.”

He feels so embarrassed when he stands next to your tall ass, it makes him feel belittled. Especially when you actively have to look down just to make eye contact

But if you’re short then he loves it. Finally for once he doesn’t have to be reminded of his height when standing next to anyone.

Spy

He’s gone as soon as you show up. Like straight up disappears. He doesn’t like to show fear-makes him look weak

He’s convinced you could still see him though, cuz you happen to look in his direction even while he was invisible.

You don’t scare him as much as the others, if anything he took a bit of a liking to you because you stressed him out the least compared to the others. He always stood next to you + you were always his first pick for missions

You always make small talk with him. He doesn’t enjoy it but he still responds

“What is under your mask?”

“That is none of your business.”

“Why? Do you look like me?”

Spy doesn’t know if he should feel offended or annoyed

You don’t necessarily startle him like everyone else but you do make his heart jump slightly when you pop out of nowhere, you can see it in his pupils but never his body.

Pyro

HE RAN TOO BUT DIDN’T KNOW WHY LMFAO

He just saw everyone running and went ‘oh okay we’re doing this now 🏃‍♂️’

But seriously, he fell in love with you at first sight. Your features felt so intricate to him, you always gave each other blank stares, zoning into each other’s eyes.

‘⚫️ ⚫️’

“👁️‍🗨️👁️‍🗨️ hi”

“⚫️ ⚫️ mmf”

You’re the only person who can fully understand him. No, not using his body language, you can actually tell what he’s saying. He aw’s at that, finally someone knows what he’s saying.

It makes him more self aware than how he was before, he’ll say some really petty shit and when you react he panics

“Mmph mmm”

“um pyro I need you to calm yourself”

“Mm!”

Somehow you disturb HIM, you’ll point something out to him and talk to him like he’s crazy which makes him crazy

“Pyro, you reek of fire, it’s 30° outside, and it’s a cease day. Do you have any thoughts?”

“Mmmf mmm mph ☹️”

*plz leave me alone

Since you and him are so observant, the rest of the mercs are a little spooked by you guys. You’ll be in the corner with him watching and everyone is fairly weirded out.

“Mm mmmfmm mm”

“Pyro you’re hilarious.”

“What did thing say?”

“He said that if you were a littlest pet shop figure you’d be #508”

“..heavy is not sure what he expected”

[deqdlyowl]

I actually have some old doodles TPtR au related... This one portrays an event from the second chapter.

I have a few more things, but they're kinda spoilers and I'm not really into spoiling... Though one of them is just a spoiler of one interesting detail I want to add (the event my sketch shows most likely won't appear in the fic), while the other one is a WHOLE AHH SPOILER of the shit happening in, maybe like 10+ chapter, I'm still not sure how big I want to make the fic, ahaha.

Also rambling and venting out my feelings under the cut because I forgot to take my meds yesterday. You don't have to read but I would be happy if you do.

.

Every time I start something I like, it begins to feel like a small obligation after some time, no matter how I feel about the thing I create. I love my fic and I really want to finish it, because it's also a huge emotional boost for me when I understand that I passed my word count goal in the chapter and I finally can write down my 24/7 daydreaming about CotL (even if not all of them, I often think about selfship, sorry, ahaha),AND I have a nice feedback. BUT. My ability is to abandon things. I have many unfinished drawings, unfinished crafts, like, a crocheted Spycrab or a full-sized HHH tf2 weapon, even though I really want to finish it all, but since I took a really long break, I just abandoned it all. That's usually the reason why I don't make comics. (The only comic I've ever made is that one silly meme about bees). And a month ago I started writing TPtR.

I'm scared of this happening to my fic, that's why I force myself to write if I'm not doing so for more than two days. Somehow it boosts my motivation, but at the same time, the thought of having to force myself to do something, even if I love it, makes me anxious. Why am I not doing anything if I love it? Perhaps it's just my depression with AuDHD kicking in, and sometimes I forget to take my ADs (I don't have ADHD meds yet) that makes me suddenly apathetic about everything. And then anxiety. And then I get sad when I can't come up with words.

Today I was describing the thing I have no experience in. I made tonnes of research, watched many videos of how people do it, tried to find words, but it looks... Meh. And I'm sad. And when I'm sad about something I do, I abandon it. BUT I WON'T. I will force myself to not, because I still want to write! I try to reassure myself that it looks shitty because it's still a draft and written in my native language. However, if looking at my current word count, the chapter won't be short, and it makes me happy. I'm sad and happy. I'm confused about my feelings about what I do!! I can just abandon doing ANYTHING and be lazy for years as it happened in middle school! But I have to force myself. To do anything at all. I already bed rot when I'm not studying, and if I'm studying at home, I still do it in bed. I'm losing weight (I'm severely underweight), my dogs feel bad (they're almost 12), it's my final year in school so I also study hard for my finals, my dreams say weird things (I believe in dream-telling or whatever, and I kinda can decipher them) and it all devours me from inside. But I can't give myself a rest. Or. I'll. Abandon. The thing. I love!

I'm repeating, but my head repeats everything most of the time as well, it's either loud and messy (adhd) or quiet and agonizing (autism), my ADs make my body parts twitch, I don't think that I need my therapist anymore, because it feels like there's no different between me before and me after talking to her.

I love my friends though. Their cheerful reaction to my fic or sketch updates is something that also boosts my motivation of doing something. I love art because of the feeling of creating something, but after finishing, I get the desire to see someone's reaction to what I did.

That's all, I think. I mean, not all, but I don't want to repeat again and again, my memory is getting worse as well, I feel like I kin Shamura ahahahha. I want to take an MRI. What if I have a tumor.

[stitchwraith-stingers]

sorry for never shutting up about how people treat hazel but ohh my god shes my fave character atm.... i get to be mad!! she has good enough information that you can play around with headcanons freely

the only moments people wouldve brung up is when dev is in the episode, there was no reason for the episode that showed her tendancy to overthink and be emberassed over small mistakes by wishing a do-over and over again, having to realise that running away from the idea of creating a problem wont help her in the long run JUST so people could go "omg haha dev has a crush on her" i could litterly not tell you what the general concensious on most episodes are because i dont know peoples opinions on them because in general they dont discuss them beyond his scenes

fanart too, ive personally muted the dev and devzel tag and when i look up #hazel wells i want you to guess how many posts i find that arent hidden! spoiler alert its barely any of them, listen im not saying im shocked at the fact The Characters Made As A Duo are drawn as a duo, its whatever and while im not personally a fan in general i really do get the appeal, but you have to admit that at some point it gets really suspicious when the only fanart you can find in one character is only with the more popular one, over 200 fics in the hazel tag on ao3 and theres only 20! without the dev tag! (10 more then when i last checked, crazy! go read fly bird, fly now), and my main problem is is that hazel is shown to be her own person OUTSIDE of their friendship, infact wouldnt you know it shes the protagonist herself! the fact that most aus ive seen are focused on dev/dale/peri is whats most confusing to me, "oh but theyre so interesting to work with"

really! youre telling me you cant think of a fic / au idea on her own? miss "i was going to have a previous godparent who didnt listen to me at all", miss "i am very anxious and i overthink to the point where my desicions", miss "i had an encounter with my evil shadow self when i was a fairy" (shout out to fairy bound au btw, im a big fan), miss "my mom doesnt fully know how to handle children inspite of being a therapist and tells me im handling things mature so i feel like i should be", miss "with the fact that im terrified my friends are making fun of me behind my back, i didnt know how to talk to anyone and a cafetiria made me so overworried and i speak to my rocks could imply the fact that i was outcasted at a young age", miss "my brother who has been my anchor and i has taught me everything i need to know has left me and hes also struggling to adjust to everything and we were insanely close to the point where the reason this whole thing started is because of him", miss "i regularly help my dad hunt a ghost that doesnt exist but it makes him happy", miss "i am litterly friends with the coolest kid in elementary school", miss "my landlords are litterly doomsday preppers and our parents want me to get along with their werido twins", miss "i didnt even hestitate to kill myself if i had to save potatoes for humanity after i pissed off mother nature", miss 'i got called out on projecting my past bonding expiriences on my best friend by some werid demon posessing her body right infront of me' none of that makes you want to think of something about her on her own? not even a spark of an idea? its almost like you guys watched exclusively 6 episodes and watched 5 minutes out of them at most

hazel is very interesting and shows her own struggles, she likes puns and fries and rocks and anime and horror movies (and apparently mushrooms if you count that one scene), she tries to problem solve so that no one is unhappy (patty being alive so winn wasnt upset, trying to get the band and orchestra together, accidently haunting her house and wishing her dads day was extra special, trying to find a dinosaur she spontaniously teleported his own job), she has multiple episodes showing her insecurities and how she tries to hide it so she doesnt look like a bad person, but inspite of it all is a understanding person and a peacemaker and doesnt like arguments, hell shes even such good autism represntation im 99.9% sure it wasnt intentional at all

dont even get me started on the takes ive seen in the finale, listen the finale has alot to be said and it definatly wont be everyones cup of tea (i think them trying to refrence every episode felt so chaotic personally) but regarding people with the ending is still giving me a headache, "she shouldve used her wish on him" that wouldve been so boring and predicable, say what you want on what she actually used it for but i think you guys should realise that for the kid whos regressing back into his bad copium mechanisms should get to face his concequences, 'hes 10 and neglected so thats why he acted like that' and 'she doesnt need to put up with how he treats her and hold his hand and be his personal therapist' can both coexist, people being pissed that she lightheartly agreed that he fucked up when HE admitted it is crazyyy CRAZYYY (also the fact ive seen someone say 'her moms a therapist she shouldve known' ???)

this isnt even touching on "hazels other relationships like her friends and family arent developed enough so thats why ppl dont care that much" while that is a valid critism i have with the show in general i still dont think applys to what im specifically talking about to demonstrate dale has appeared in THREE episodes (four if you want to stretch it), meanwhile hazels parents have appeared more often and im barely seeing them in fanart "but dale has a backstory!" so do those two have a whole episode explaining how they met "b-but dale is interesting as a role as a villain!" the guy is barely a villain [so far atleast], but also is being a therapist and a parascienists already not an interesting enough? are you guys suddenly not able to make as much headcanons expanding apon them as you did with dale? thats the thing that confuses me the most, whats stopping you from giving random information from your head to anyone else?, (i didnt know how to word this point so hopefully this makes sense)

listen im going to say it right now MOST OF THIS IS DEFINATLY UNINTENTIONAL AND NOT EVERYONE IS DOING THIS ON PURPOSE but some of u guys might really need to uncover some biases on why you think the black girl should coddle the rich white boy when he wasnt treating her well at the time, if that makes sense

[lalune9x]

S-Classes novel SPOILERS chapter 470

some thoughts after translating this chapter. as I've translated this arc, I've become fully convinced that the confession/rejection subplot was intentionally presented in parallel with sung hyunje 'breaking up' with yoojin in order to repeatedly bash the reader over the head with the funny narrative device of "you think he's saying all this romance and heartbreak-related stuff about a woman, but he's actually thinking about sung hyunje!!"

I already explained how the korean word for 'getting rejected' also means 'getting broken up with' (차이다). so when the characters mention yoojin being rejected (by chloe), you could also read it as him being broken up with... and because korean often leaves out pronouns and the subjects/objects of actions and requires readers to fill the meaning in by context, it makes the ironic ambiguity even stronger. the story is repeatedly prompting the reader to fill in for themselves who yoojin is really heartbroken over.

then this section in chap 470 is wild, because WHY is it structured like this?

"[...] I still think it's fine to like whatever or whomever you want. No matter how it turns out." Because liking people and things brought joy and could even bring comfort. It was a positive feeling, in any case. Of course, you could also struggle because of it. I had. But even then, I didn't think I would regret any of it. Even if I were to lose it all once more, if I went back, I'd still end up liking them all again. I mean Sung Hyunje, too… He wasn't bad… well... he had put me through some crazy situations. Still, there'd been fun times too. That one time it had been delicious, yeah. That other time it had also been tasty. That one restaurant had suited my palate well. Naturally, Myungwoo's cooking was the best, but he fussed too much about my health. Though it really was amazing that healthy food could still taste that good. "Of course, I shouldn't go falling head over heels and giving up my heart on a silver platter," I said. "But I'm going to do what I like." It wasn't a big change, but how should I put it? I guess I would focus more on prioritizing myself. At my words, Yoohyun's expression became gloomier. "I understand, hyung. She's a foreigner, anyway." "…What?"

like what is the logical connection between these thoughts for yoojin that isn't 'I might have romantically-inclined feelings for this guy I keep thinking about'? how else am I supposed to read it? he's been comforting himself about how it's okay to like people, says he would like the same people even if he had to do things over again, and the one example of those people he brings up is... sung hyunje? he starts reminiscing about hyunje... cooking for him? (he doesn't even specify that the "delicious" things he's talking about are food at first)

and then right after those reminiscences about the fun times he had with hyunje, yoojin says he won't go too far in loving people, but he'll still do what he likes? he'll prioritize himself, aka act selfishly? the very thing he said he was going to do by refusing to let sung hyunje go? the story really smacks you in the face with the conclusion it wants you to draw.

also of course yoohyun misunderstands that yoojin's talking about chloe, because all of his sung hyunje-focused thoughts are internal!! even yoojin himself is confused at who/what yoohyun is even talking about at first because all yoojin's been thinking about is sung hyunje! (and maybe because in korean yoohyun doesn't specify 'she', so yoojin's thought process might've been like mine, thinking "huh, can shj really be called a foreigner?" before understanding yoohyun's just not privy to yoojin's gay inner monologue).

[waggledoogledoggle]

⚠️Spoilers for Hazbin ep 4⚠️

⚠️Also, this post will talk about Abuse and SA, it is briefly mentioned a few times throughout the rest of this… whole long thingy I wrote⚠️

⚠️Also, brief mention of the scene where someone tried to drug Angel⚠️

Ok, I am just genuinely baffled at the people who somehow find a way to hate on 'Loser, Baby'.

Like, if you don't like Huskerdust that's fine... but 'Loser, Baby' is not overshadowing/brushing off Angel's SA. It's not victim blaming. And it's not Husk telling Angel to just shut up and get over it.

Like I've seen it so much, and you know what? Fuck it. Welcome to my TedTalk on why it's not all of those things.

For starters: Husk doesn't know about Angel's SA

When Angel has his vulnerable outburst (Side note, props to Blake I mean, they said 'take 5' he heard 'change lives') he talks about how he feels like he has to act the way he does to keep Valentino happy because he stupidly sold his soul to him. That he wants to get drugged up because that’s his escape. That he wants to be broken because maybe, just maybe Val will let him go. He wants to be free, but he can't and he has no one to blame but himself.

"What's the worst part of this hell, I can only blame myself" is literally the pre chorus to his song (Poison), and that is what he shares with Husk.

Not once does he bring up his abuse or SA. If he did, do you think a song would have even happened? Look how Husk reacted when someone tried to drug Angel's drink! Now that Husk actually genuinely cares about him? Dead. Dead. Valentino would be dead.

Us knowing about Angels situation in full is dramatic irony which is, essentially, we as the audience know more/are given more insight than the other characters. We were given the insight of Angel's true trauma that he deals with on the daily. Husk and the rest of the Hotel were not and have no idea what he deals with, the only one that even has an inkling is Charlie and even then we still know WAY more about Angel’s situation than her, so you can't really get upset at Husk for not knowing something he would have no way of knowing unless Angel shared it with him directly.

Moving onto the song itself, it's a song of empathy.

Allow me to explain.

Husk pinpoints perfectly what Angel is feeling in this moment:

"So things look bad, and your back's against the wall Your whole existence seems fuckin' hopeless You're feelin' filthy as a dive bar bathroom stall Can't face the world sober and dopeless You've lost your way, you think your life is wrecked"

When Husk starts singing, you can tell that Angel is expecting Husk to pull the whole "But that's not true! It's not hopeless! You're life's not wrecked!" and is very surprised when Husk doesn't.

Instead, Husks says "Yeah. You're right." And this is when a lot of the haters get angry- but hold on a second.

When someone is feeling all of those things, saying things like "That's not true! You'll be ok!" aren't helpful at all. That's brushing it off. Even if it may be true, that doesn't help anyone when they're feeling like hopeless, lost, losers.

Because that's sympathy, not empathy. Sympathy is feeling for someone, and trying to make them feel better. Empathy, is not trying to make them feel any certain way- better or worse- empathy is simply feeling with someone. And that's what Husk does.

During the first chorus, Husk is clearly teasing Angel a bit while doing so, but not without good reason. It's keeping Angel from closing back up again, he's being a little bit silly with him and teasing him. I mean, did you see the silly lil walk he did crossing in front of Angel? And Angel is super confused because he's like "how tf is this supposed to make me feel better??"

That's the thing. It's not. That's sympathy's job, not empathy's. Empathy just want's you to feel felt with, it doesn't want to tell you how to feel. And adding that bit of silliness gives Angel's vulnerability a chance to breathe and it prevents Angel from closing in on himself.

The next verse, pre-chorus, and chorus is when the empathy though really kicks in.

The next verse, is the first part of empathy: Sharing about a similar experience you went through.

In this verse, now that Angel is listening not just hearing, Husk shares that he has been gruesomely damaged. Calling back to what he shared literally seconds before the song. That he knows what it's like to sign away your soul, and constantly look back at it with huge amounts of regret. That knowing that moment is what turned him into the mess he is today, and that he has no one to blame but himself. Just like Angel.

Then in the pre-chorus where there's the whole:

"I sold my soul to a psychopathic freak Haha! And you think that makes you unique? Get outta here, man!"

That isn't Husk telling Angel to get over himself and this isn’t him undermining what Angel’s been through. That's him saying 'I did too, you're not alone’

And then the very simple word change from "you're" to "we're" in the chorus is SO FREAKING HUGE. Because Husk is essentially saying "You feel like a total loser right now. Ok. Then if what happened to you/what you went through makes you a loser, then I'm a loser too. Let's be loser's together." Instead of trying to make Angel stop feeling like he's a hopeless loser, he decides that he is too.

He meets Angel where he is.

Aka: ✨empathy✨

Angel finally feels seen, understood, felt with. All the goals of empathy. He no longer feels alone in what he is struggling with, which is HUGE! Especially for people going through/dealing with SA and abuse.

The bridge of the song, is also extremely important, because this is where they acknowledge the differences in what they're going through. Their root problem is the same, but how it messed up their lives and created the problems they deal with now are completely different

And that's around when the song begins to shift from just Husk showing empathy and comforting Angel, to them both finding comfort in each other.

Which you can clearly see by the chorus under the umbrella, where it's not just one of them singing the chorus, but it's both of them. Because they have found a place to go to and confide in, a place of comfort, with each other.

Like, I am genuinely concerned that people find this song toxic like... have- have you never experienced empathy before? Are you ok?

So yeah, to wrap this up, if you don’t like ‘Loser, Baby’ just because you don’t like the song in general? That’s fine (odd, but fine)

But if you hate it because it “undermines Angel’s experience and what he goes through” I…

words.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk

[yukipri]

So, I binged The Acolyte last night.

I had a mental block and couldn't get myself to start while it was coming out, and I also haven't touched any High Republic era media before which made me hesitant. But the spoilers/gifs/fanart etc I saw convinced me I should give it a try.

I'm not a huge fan of binging, I like sitting and thinking with each episode, so I expected to just watch an episode or two, give it a day or so, then continue if I liked it.

But, to my great surprise, once I started, I couldn't really stop (aaand stayed up till 7 AM, oops).

I think it had several things going for it:

-The acting was genuinely phenomenal. I feel like I would have felt completely differently about the show if different actors had been involved, and i mean that more strongly than I usually do. Their delivery in certain moments really sold me.

-It's not your usual Star Wars genre. I'd consider it mystery/suspense with a touch of horror, and it really does come together. Some of the characters are experience a more stereotypical Star Wars action/adventure story, but are jerked out of their genre at certain moments. It's pretty neat, and makes the twists fun and interesting (even if you were completely spoiled beforehand, like me lol)

-The costumes were gorgeous and unique.

-Some truly gorgeous cinematography, shots that have beautiful composition and lighting.

-It was rich in lore and references, some from Legends that I caught, many from the High Republic that I didn't catch but appreciated nonetheless. It felt deeply connected to the SW Universe.

-While cynical, the writing says things that I've thought about but never really thought Star Wars would have the guts to say. The writing is also Tight, meaning that little moments of character interactions bring up things that will be necessary/helpful to the plot later, and I appreciated that. There felt like very little waste.

-There are genuinely no "good" or "bad" guys. Every character makes mistakes or has horrible qualities, yet also positive ones. We see and understand motives, even if we don't agree with them, and see the fallout of those actions. This made almost everyone compelling. The narrative and writing gives the audience space to think.

Things that I wasn't as much a fan of:

-I felt like most of the sets felt kind of generic and Earth-like, especially in comparison to the rich costumes and alien characters.

-There are some fantastic fight scenes and emotional scenes, where the acting and cinematography was fantastic, but I wish the music had been a bit more memorable. I can't really recall any of it, and I feel like there were scenes that could have been truly iconic had the music resounded more with me.

Now, some more specific thoughts, SPOILERS below:

On Sol:

Sol is a character who, I believe in most cases, I would have absolutely despised. But holy shit, Lee Jung-jae. I am not exaggerating when I say that his performance is perhaps one of the best, if not THE best performances I've ever seen in live action Star Wars. He played this character so tenderly, so genuinely.

Despite being misguided, having made terrible decisions, and making mistakes that even he acknowledges, Sol himself always truly thought he was doing what was right, and loved Osha with his whole being even at the end, and it Shows. The way he looks at Osha was so sincere.

This is why I can't get myself to hate Sol as a character. It makes me feel so conflicted, like how can a guy with so much love and genuine desire to help and do good go so wrong? And that, I think, is one of the major points of the show, and Lee Jung-jae absolutely sells it. What a phenomenal actor. You could genuinely watch this show for him alone.

On Osha/Mae:

When the first info/promos for Acolyte came out and Amandla Stenberg was announced as the main character, I admit I was a bit confused. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't that I thought she couldn't act, but it's just that her face is so kind. She looks so warm (and gosh, she's so beautiful), but it made me go hmm, she looks like a Good Guy Protag, a Hero, so I was a bit confused as to how she was going to lead "the Acolyte," which from the title, I assumed she'd be Dark Side. Even with the early promo scenes of Mae fighting Indara, I wasn't really sold on her being "Dark."

And it turns out, that was exactly the point of the casting.

Amandla was perfect, and was brilliant at portraying two characters who not only have different and distinct personalities, but also both shift and change throughout the show. Mae never came off as "Dark" to me, because she isn't. Osha's not necessarily Light OR Dark, but she's independent. They are balanced, yet cycling, reminiscent of that little palm-to-palm circling ritual that the girls do. Amandla's portrayal of them was poetry, and made me so very invested in them.

I think if there's one thing I really wish the show had included more of, it's both Osha and Mae's pasts between their tragic separation and their reunion in the present. What was Osha's Padawan-ship actually like? I feel like the exact reason for the timing of her leaving the Order was ambiguous, and I wanted to know more. And was Mae with "the Master" the entire time?

I truly wish Osha could have heard the full story from Sol, because of his many crimes, ironically, killing her mother really was a genuine accident. There are things I wish he could have apologized to her for, or that she could have understood about him, such as how that night at the coven was largely driven by how Sol felt connected to her. This is one part where, while I get how the writers went this way, I do wish I could have felt more closure to their relationship.

I found it so tragic that Qimir erased Mae's memories and they had to be separated so soon after finally understanding each other. I really hope that if there's a season 2, they can be reunited.

On Qimir:

Preface by saying I was spoiled regarding his identity long before I started, by all those thirsty posts/tweets. And man, I GET IT.

But thirst magnet aside, I found him a genuinely fascinating character. For one thing, he's kind of an ironic character to *be* a Darksider. He seems so chill and laid-back, is honorable (or at least keeps his word), and despite his words about using emotions to harness energy, we don't really see him passionately mad/anything really. In contrast, the Jedi we see around him are furious, scared, sad. It's interesting that he almost seems more calm, but not necessarily because he's trying: he just doesn't care.

Manny Jacinto's portrayal of the character made him so damn Likable. Which, is pretty hard to reconcile with the fact that I genuinely liked Jecki and Yord, but a lot of his lines make me just go, y'know he's got a point. Like the whole, "She was a child," "You brought her here." Like yeah. Honestly, fair. His little quips, the delivery, the I'm-just-a-chill-dude attitude, actually keeps his word, and on the flip side, undeniable ruthless skill and viciousness that took down a whole team of Jedi single-handedly. It's a very BRRRRRR combo.

In general, I don't really get too attached to "Dark Side" characters, and don't really have a favorite Sith. Or at least, I didn't, but I think Qimir (or whatever his actually name is) might claim that spot now. Truly peak character, I truly hope we get to see more with him.

And this is kind of an aside, but can I just say, it felt unreal to have entire fight sequences focussing on just two Asian actors, with the other protagonist we see a black girl, for huge chunks of the show? No white people except comparatively brief side characters? In a Star Wars show?!?? All of them unique and well fleshed out and phenomenally written and acted?? None of it felt like "forced diversity," it's all so natural, that when I step back and thought about it in these terms it just...again, feels unreal. I'm so grateful for these characters, and hope we get more like them.

On Jecki and Yord:

Honestly given what I saw about Yord before hand, I was expecting him to be far more annoying than he was. Sure, he was a little stiff, but he felt like a young Jedi Knight who was trying to prove himself and do his best, and I think he very clearly did care for Osha.

Jecki, gosh I loved her. She felt very similar to Ahsoka, if a bit more by the book. She was very wise for her youth. I loved the budding friendship between her and Osha, how they helped each other and weren't jealous.

The thing about both of these characters, which I think the writers did so well, is that they felt like protagonists. In another story, they would have been the main characters, the heroes. Both of them were so young, so early in their training/careers. They could have become Obi-Wans, Ahsokas. Jecki especially was bursting with so much potential.

But alas, this was not that story. It makes it that much shocking when their lives are cut so abruptly short. We were given time to get to know these characters, to care for them, and then without much fanfare, boom. Gone.

On one hand, I sorta Hate That. On the other, I deeply respect the writers for going there, because I think it did have an Impact on the story and show.

On the Witches/Mother Aniseya:

Admittedly I was a little ehhhhh on some of the world-building regarding the witches, just the use of the words "witch" and "coven" and some of the chanting with gasping cackling women etc felt a bit caricature. I do get that they wanted us to have a vibe for this group and to get one with limited screentime, and sometimes stereotypes are the way to do that. I didn't love it, but also didn't mind it too much.

I actually really loved Mother Aniseya. For one thing, the actress is Gorgeous, her costume stunning, and she really sold the whole otherworldly ethereal immortal goddess vibe well, in a way that still felt Star Wars. For the other, I liked how she was the soft, empathetic one, it kinda contrasted with expectation of her position.

I also loved Mother Koril, and how again, she was designed as a character foil to Mother Aniseya. I love how we didn't see too much of them, but could still see that they were partners who loved and respected each other (I hesitate to say "wives," because I feel like their society may not exactly have the same concept of marriage, but partners was undeniable). I think it was a neat Oh moment when they stated that Mother Koril is the one who carried the twins. Love them.

I know I'll have more thoughts, but yeah, to sum it up, I enjoyed Acolyte a ton more than I thought i would, and am so glad I gave it a chance.

Other things:

-Mentioned earlier that I love "little moments of character interactions bring up things that will be necessary/helpful to the plot later." Some actual examples of this: When we see Sol noticing Osha's tattoo and Osha saying he must hate it, which in the moment, shows the kind of guardian-student relationship they have, and how little seems to have changed for them in the time they've been a part. Later, it's shown to clearly identify Osha after Mae steals her clothes. Another is the rolly polly moth things, which at first seem just like a way to show This Forest Dangerous, but then are a plot point to temporarily escape from Qimir, and later on, to show Vernestra's connection to the Force (and also her light whip). Stuff like that, I really like.

-I so appreciated Qimir's Cortosis helmet. For one thing, it's neat that it's not just cool-looking or a disguise, but actually is Force-blocking. I think an official SW account factoid said that this is also how beskar works, though beskar is stronger. The two effects this has: when the user is wearing it, they're forced to confront what's inside of them. The other, is that it hides the wearer's identity from Force users who would otherwise recognize them. The latter is my personal headcanon for beskar helmets, so it's very gratifying to see it in canon! The former has some interesting implications for Force-users who wear beskar.

-The cynical view of the Jedi Order as an Institution, and all the politics, corruption, and obscuring of dirt that that entails. Admittedly this may be because of my own increasingly cynical perspective on the Order, but it felt honest and I agreed with most of it. The fact that individuals are trying their best to do "good" does not negate the fact that they are pretty much acting as Space Cops. This line by Senator Rayencourt felt especially raw:

"I think the Jedi are a massive system of unchecked power, posing as a religion, a delusional cult that claims to claim the uncontrollable. [] Your emotions."

Framed as a religion having unchecked power—that feels uncomfortably realistic! And also zeroing in on how for all their power, the Jedi are still people, and just as fallible (and therefore, must necessarily be held just as accountable).

Also:

I can see how this portrayal of the Jedi may make some folks uncomfortable, especially if you love the Jedi, but I long hold that the Jedi as an organization are deeply flawed. It's part of why I personally like the "fall of the Republic" era; both the Galactic Republic and Jedi Order have deep, fatal flaws, and this is an era where that all comes to a head—one where they must fall, or fix themselves.

So in conclusion, my favorite parts: the characters, and the moral grayness of almost everyone. Many stories may claim there's no good/evil dichotomy, but few ever truly show it, but this one did.

I'm not sure yet if I want to "fandom" over this or if I'm pretty satisfied with having just watched it, but it was definitely worth the watch and I'm glad I gave it a try!

~~

~~

I also kept a lil document of live reaction notes as I was watching, which I'll copy below:

Episode 1

UEDA?? The planet is just, UEDA?? A pretty common Japanese surname?? That's like. Naming a planet Johnson or somethin...

Loving the costumes 'n set

Oh wait I recognize this scene, it's the one they played as a preview at the AMC Star Wars marathon

Idk how to feel about the Space Generic T-Shirt

Ooh Neimoidians (thank you for no horrendously exaggerated Evil Japanese Accent TM), and interesting Jedi ship shape

Oh interesting interesting they intentionally paralleling TPM eh

Hrmn not a positive first impression of Master Vernestra, her lines are so mechanical

Very cool pilot chair droids and tentacle alien

Osha says practice vehicle safety and wear seatbelts and protect your head!

Oh Osha has Trauma I see. Girl ain't getting good sleep

Oh wow Sol Loves Osha, oh no is this going to lead to Padawan Jealousy Trauma between Osha and Jecki. How much are we heavily paralleling TPM here

Kill the dream eh?

Episode 2

Oh there are multiple Jedi temples, that's nice

Jedi Temple using same security system as Jabba is...uh

Mae tips, good for her

Master Torbin just sittin' there, lookin like some random youtuber. why tabi socks

Man I dig Mae's patchwork cloak with massive princess hood.

It's pronounced KAI-meer??? My Chinese ass thought it was Chee-mir

Barash Vow

Ohhh so Mae doesn't know that Qimir...? (was spoiled)

Episode 3

ooh i like the fairy clione things

Ohhh village all women??

Mother Aniseya is stunning

Oh she and Koril blatantly lesbian, fantastic

Oh gosh the Jedi are NOT looking good here. They don't have the right to train children?? WTF

You must let the children take the test?? And if they pass the Jedi will take them away??? That does NOT sound very consensual!!

Oh gosh, selling "you are special" to a child, after separating her from her community...

Really feel like "how does taking a child away affect their community" should be factored into jedi stuff

Mae that is...sudden and violent wtf

Kinda not trusting Sol here

Episode 4

Wow Kelnacca looks...mentally stable

Ohhh Qimir's ship? Looks suspiciously Kylo Ren-ish

Qimir really suspicious eh

Oh wow not using the Force or anything, just using a sniffy guy

They're really doing a Fellowship of the Ring walk huh

Look I absolutely adore Mae's long gorgeous cloak but that is going to drag half the forest floor with her

Not liking those tree bulbs. looks spider eggy

Osha don't Touch the Thing, that's such a Pippin move

oh no, not spider eggs...rolly polly moth vampire thing

Really enjoying Osha and Jecki's friendship, I'm so glad it's not former Padawan jealousy

Oh, Mae, oh no....knowing spoilers...oh...

The red lightsaber igniting next to Osha's head...dang what fantastic composition

The lil hand twitch and head snap. I Get It.

I remember when "Darth Teeth" was trending

And wow that's a Cliffhanger

Episode 5

Oh no Osha knocked out that doesn't bode well

How many against one is that damn

The double spear through then hidden head lop...wow

holy shit booma-saber

Oooooh the cut treeeeees damn

all that death before even the opening title

Honestly GO JECKI, that's very impressive, her win against Mae AND double saber against Darth Teeth, Anakin level spinning and drama

Holy shit Jecki's death was brutal...

She was a child - You brought her here - FAIR

Why risk discovery - I did wear a mask LMAO

Damn did he just casually break Mae's leg

I don't make the rules - the Jedi do

The Jedi say I can't exist...wow

Holy shit Yord's death

Damn full on brawl

I've accepted my darkness, what have you done with yours

Damn really yeeted Qimir from the fight by sticking a light on his back

Pip tho ;_; killin droids feels like killin pets...

They've turned you against me - really Anakin quotin

Wow Sol, not even going to see Jecki????

And wtf how can Sol not tell that Mae's switched them??? Has fandom been grossly misunderstanding how the Jedi use the Force....how the fuck can any Jedi tell apart any clones eh...

While not exactly subtle, I appreciate how lil details in character interactions have had pay offs. Like the tree bugs and Osha's tattoo being a way to identify her

Episode 6

He really just makin a hot pot

his lair kinda looks like sequels Luke's island

Not sure how I feel about the elephant rock bird things

Honestly glad we get to see Sol upset and affected by everyone's deaths. Might explain part of why he can't tell apart the twins?

Oh he's really wearing hakama hakama

Wow Qimir really just getting in buck naked eh. Is this the scene that Manny froze his balls off for

His line about it being fine in a fight but vengeance a few hours later

Oh he brought a change of clothes

Damn the Jedi are taught "it fades"???

Aww Osha, u aren't tempted by the soup??

Oh wow we revisiting bodies, that feels...u usual for SW. Oh there's a Kel Dor... (why are there no flies buzzing yet. or are there no flies yet)

Mae wakes up so peacefully compared to Osha

Oooh sensory deprivation mask, all dark, nothing but breathing, evocative of Darth Vader even if breathing is not similar

Episode 7

Vergence....iiiiinteresting

Sol, stalking lil kids is creepy af

Oh my god you're just gonna break in???

See - You cannot deny the Jedi have a right to test potential Padawans - Why the fuck not???? You don't have the right to stalk, spy on, break into random people's homes, and talk directly to their children without permission from guardians??

Guh Sol....

Interrogation after isolation from guardians....

Oh, the Jedi Council is right for once??

Do not alter this little girl's destiny because you have formed an emotional attachment to her

Gosh I thought Indara was the most innocent in this buuuuut

Episode 8

I'm surprised they never added Darth Teeth's mask to the front credits

"See you in hell" Oh I know Han mentioned Hell like once but I thought they were avoiding mentioning it in newer media

Holy shit Rayencourt: I think the Jedi are a massive system of unchecked power, posing as a religion, a delusional cult that claims to claim the uncontrollable. - Kinda uncomfortably real!!

-We don't control the Force - no, your emotions - OOF

I didn't realize till this ep how the cool Brendok eclipse got that line, it's the comet ring. super neat

oof Mae climbing out of the scene of Trauma...

Oh that is some Wu Xia shit

"I will destroy you if i must" really??

Nice dagger saber

Okay Sol that is Cool

oh gosh, the plot-relevant inversion of clothes resulting in it reflecting how they swapped light/dark is SO cool

very yin yang fighting

Damn it keeps coming down to the unarmed opponent thing

Damn, Mae going the justice route

Damn, just Damn

Gosh the thing about Sol is that he is SO well acted, so sincere in his love and devotion, it's hard to hate him

I'm glad the helmets block the Force identity like that tho, fits headcanon

Glad Basil continues to shine

Oh no. Vernestra...I thought you were doing the right thing revealing the truth, but instead you're continuing the cycle of covering up crimes

Oh...use Mae to find Vernestra's former Padawan...that's a cycle alright

And ends with Yoda okay

[marytunno]

- play Jacob and the stone -

I felt inspired by this quote from the writer Lena Karla, in its heartbreaking simplicity it made me think about a lot of stuff...

But since in here I post mostly about Arya Stark and Gendrya I'll use my emotions to write about that.

No one asked me in particular but I am a yapper anyways... I wanted to answer, mostly for myself, about two questions about this paring.

1 Why do I personally ship Gendrya

2 Do I think they'll be endgame (spoiler I'm losing hope on twow ever being published yey)

I can count on one, ok maybe both, hands the ships in books and general media that I care about. I like most canon ships and the ones I dislike don't interfere much with my viewing experience, but I rarely feel a connection. Gendrya is an exception, I really, really care about these two. Without getting too personal... I love Arya's character so deeply, I started reading the books ( and watching the show) when I was very young, too young heheh, and so, the characters I could relate to and really understand were few, Arya being the main one. I can't say I have been through the same traumatic shit she has, but I know too well what it means to watch your family slowly die, suffer, disappear without being able to do anything about it, feeling just like the helpless kid I was. I know really well the anger, the self doubt, the fear, the numbness, the confusion that Martin was able to write in Arya's and other young character's chapters. I wasn't drawn to Asoiaf as the "wine and tits" thing, or for the over the top violence, I still feel like it's kinda well balanced and never too much btw, but because I saw deeply human characters experiencing loss like I was and I couldn't look away. What I always looked for in these pages, in this story, were the moments of light, of warmth, the moments that proved that even in the middle of the horrors of war and hate and manipulations some people care, some people get up every time they fall, some people come back for you, always. This to say that Gendrya, as a friendship mainly, is one of those moments of light in these books. I relate so deeply to the feeling of being alone, on the run, angry... and the way these characters find in each other a safe place, the way they trust each other, they fight, they speak the same words at the same time, they come back to each other... has me truly invested. They work very well together, have opposite upbringings and yet similar ideals, different personalities and yet the same temper... They have a way to challenge and bring out the best in each other. He is always there in her chapters, a presence almost given for granted until the harsh world they live in pulls them apart. I feel like the only stronger relationships Arya has are the ones with her family, mainly Jon, and I can't wait for her to be reunited to those who are still alive (or half alive hehe)... but I feel that there is still space for Gendry in her life, Arya had so so so much love to give, not per se in a romantic way, and we know our boy definitely needs some. All this to say I once was an angry and lost kid ( kinda still am haha) and I love seeing two lost and angry kids, in spite of everything, taking care of each other.

Yey so it's time for answer n2. As I have spoiled before... I kinda don't believe in Asoiaf to be ever finished, I sure hope, but ya know... So to me we will never know and Gendrya will stay as a great connection and friendship that could have turned romantic in some future... to me not knowing if they will ever be endgame doesn't spoil what we already have... I sure hope, if the books ever get published, that Arya gets to meet again most people she has left in westeros... From a narrative stand point it makes sense for her to cross paths again with the brotherhood (LSH yey) and having someone she can trust on her side wouldn't hurt. I don't rule out a romantic development, rebuilding their friendship to me would be more than enough, because I feel like Grrm could really easily go that way and most experiences Arya is having in essos are about her growing up into a woman. I mean we have to face it she won't be a child forever and I feel like she would love having her own family, her own pak to love fiercely. Even if one of them dies or they part ( I don't see them doing that easily after meeting again but who knows) I feel like the end of a relationship/friendship doesn't make it less beautiful and meaningful. For sure Arya could have other love interests but, I'm not into incest and actually having a brother that I love so so much, incest is kind of unthinkable to me (not sorry hehe) and in general most men in Asoiaf are not that great ( at least as partners let's be honest) and I want Arya to be with someone that loves and respects her for who she is and doesn't want to force her into standards that shouldn't even exist.

ok... I feel like nothing I said was coherent but who cares haha... at least the edit is kinda nice... in my mind it takes place while they are separated and think they'll never meet again... but if someone ( cough cough George) decides to write maybe that separation won't have to last forever.

An update: I'm writing something right now that I would define as a "what if" in the og asoiaf universe... I hope I'll be able to post it soon...

Byeee <3

[pebiejeebies]

Spoilers below!! Watch iii18 <33

DID ANYONE NOTICE ALL THE KINDNESS THAT WAS TOWARDS CABBY?? AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO DID?!

*sry for these two agh—*

SORRY I HAD TO— LOOK AT THEM 😭😭‼️‼️

BACK TO THE RAMBLES

YOU GO BOT!! BEAT HIS ASS!!

LOOAAADDSS OF THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS I DIDNT EXPECT GETTING AFTER THIS EPISODE

Ramble below if you’re interested <3

OKAY SO WHAT-

THE AMMOUNT OF RECOGNITION, FORGIVENESS, AND LITERAL CONFUSION WITH CABBY’S GOOD AND BAD THINGS IN THIS EPISODE WAS SO FUCKING AWESOME

EVEN PAINTBRUSH, FAN, AND TESTTUBE, WHO WERE THE BIGGEST ENEMIES, WERE SLIGHTLY ON HER SIDE! AND EVEN SUPPORTED HER CHANGE!!

LIKE— AND WHEN BOT MENTIONED HOW HARD IT MUSTVE BEEN FOR CABBY TO REJOIN AFTER BEING ELIMINATED BY LITERALLY EVERYONE (MAINLY TESTTUBE) IS ACTUALLY TRUE

YOU REJOIN TO PEOPLE WHO DONT WANT TO SEE YOU TALK OR EVEN BREATHE AFTER WHAT YOU DID, THEN YOU START AN ALLIANCE TO KEEP YOURSELF IN THE GAME WITH SO MUCH HATE AIMED TOWARDS YOU WITH SOMEONE WHO WILL GET ELIMINATED TOO—

THEN SHE SLOWLY AND STEADILY STARTS TO WALK ON THE RIGHT PATH!! SHE NOTICED HER WRONGS, AND STARTED WITH YINYANG, SHE MADE A HEALTHY FRIENDSHIP! AND THEN BOT! TWO HEALTHY FRIENDSHIPS THAT SHE DIDNT EXPECT TO EVEN FIGHT FOR HER SAKE

THE SHOCK IN HER FACE WHEN YINYANG, CLOVER, AND BOT WERE CONFUSED ABOUT HER BAD SIDE WAS LITERALLY HEART WARMINGGGG IM GONNA EXPLODE

WORST PART? SHE DOESNT EVEN KNOW THAT ANYONE IS PROTECTING HER IN THAT JAIL!! SHE KNOWS THAT SHE MADE TOO MUCH OF A WRONG AND DOESNT THINK ANYONE WOULD FIGHT FOR HER!! (Other than balloon,, yikes man,, only two votes 😭)

Okay but let’s be fr, we all collectively got angry from Nickel in this scene right?? RIGHT????

LUCKYYYYYYY??? LUUUUUUUCCCCKKKYYYYYY???? ME OH MY. ME AND CABBY HAVE ONE THING IN COMMON, AND THATS NEVER LUCK! EVEN IF HE DOESNT KNOW THAT SHE STRUGGLED, THAT DOESNT GIVE HIM ANY RIGHT TO DESTROY SOMEONE ELSES STRUGGLES BY COMPARING THEM TO OTHERS!! YES I GET IT, HE’S SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THIS

BUT THIS IS JUST.. PATHETIC 😭

HE’S TRYING TO MAKE BALLOON WIN WHEN IN REALITY, NOBODY AGREES, AND HIM FIGHTING FOR BALLOON ENDS UP BY HIM SAYING ACTUAL BULLSHIT AFTERWARDS

YEAH WE GET IT, YOU LOVE BALLOON AND ADMIRE HIS CHANGE, BUT NICKEL, ONLY YOU NOTICED. HES ANGRY THAT NOBODY CARES WHEN THEY ALL HAVE A POINT!!

THEY ONLY SAW THE BAD SIDES OF BALLOON, AND NOT TO MENTION, BALLOON AND NICKEL!! THESE TWO TORE UP POOR BOT AND DIDNT EVEN SAY MUCH TO THEM!

I admire your care for them Nickel, but actually fucking wake up. Like please, get over your blindness and realize that literally NOBODY saw his arc and how he changed

WOOH. That was a slight vent there lmao.. guess who hates nickel guys…

BUT OTHER THAN THAT, THE OVERALL FUSS WITH CABBY IS ACTUALLY PRETTY FUCKING AWESOME! LOOK AT HER, SHE DOESNT EVEN KNOW THAT BOT AND YINYANG ARE FIGHTING THEIR SOULS OUT TO MAKE HER WIN 😭😭‼️

*ahem look at balloon here aweee <3*

AND LIKE.. THAT SAYS SO MUCH ABOUT HER GUYS, SHE’S HURT, AND SHE KNOWS SHE HURT OTHERS, AND SHE FULLY EXPECTS EVERYONE TO VOTE BALLON OR SILVER OVER HER, NOT KNOWING THE TWO PEOPLE SHE HELPED ARE ACTUALLY HELPING HER BACK AND HELPING OTHERS REALIZE THE VERY SHINY OBVIOUS CHOICE FOR THE WINNER!!

THINK ABOUT IT, BALLOON? HE DID GREAT, BUT HE TOOK, JUST A LITTLE TOO LONG TO CHANGE, AND HIS CHANGE WASNT NOTICED BECAUSE LITERALLY EVERYONE WAS ELIMINATED, AND/OR WAS HIDDEN BEHIND THE FIGHTS THAT NICKEL AND BALLOON HAD! NOBODY SEES ANYTHING IN HIM BECAUSE OF THIS, AND PROBABLY NOBODY WILL VOTE HIM OTHER THAN NICKEL AND GOO (Which I think personally, goo is only voting balloon because of his poetry, which.. really says something about balloon don’t you think?)

Now SILVERSPOON?? DO I EVEN NEED TO TALK?! HIS FAT FUCKING EGO LITERALLY TORE UP FRIENDSHIPS, MANIPULATED, HURT, AND PROBABLY FUCKING KILLED HIS WIFE

DO I NEED TO CONTINUE ON HIM? NO, IM SURE EVERYONE UNDERSTANDS WHAT IM SAYING. RIGHT..??

Maybe I love seeing myself (a cabby kin) get recognition after all the struggles she goes through, but let’s be fr, Balloon? Not really, SILVERSPOON?? HELL FUCKING NO.

That’s why BOT and YINYANG WERE FRUSTRATED!!!! They’re all blind to his fucking ‘Inner flame’ or whatever, which then led his wife, and probably Mephone into so much more fucking trouble. And that infuriates the two that literally lasted so long and saw her grow from each challenge!

They’re frustrated because the obvious option is being pushed away by silver-spoon, again, with the manipulation and the tricks! AGAIN!! to try and win something that you don’t deserve (which is nothing, so like yeowch) is kinda frustrating

As much as I want cabby to win, what will she win? After all this struggle she went through, watching everyone villainize her, as she thought she was genuinely caring to help her team, and to barely survive the votes with yinyang, which then got eliminated, she then struggled to fix her friendship with bot, who both shared an equal struggle with testtube

The actual fact that bot is literally fighting their mom is wild, EVEN FAN EXPECTED THEM TO FORGIVE EACH OTHER!!

But after all of this, she really didn’t win anything

if we remove her boyfriend, (yinyang) and bff forever and ever (Bot) she sorta doesn’t win much, which really sucks

But hey, even balloon has someone to talk to, imagine being silverspoon

Even if he wins, he will LITERALLY win nothing, and good golly gosh Test tube and Paintbrush I’d like to hear why the hecking heck you’d vote for him?? Seriously? All that flattery worked THAT well?!

They do know that he’s manipulating them.. RIGHHTTT??? MAYBE IM JUST VERY FRUSTRATED THAT NOT EVERYONE WANST THE OBVIOUS WINNER TO WIN BUT HEY IM NOT WRONG!!!

I’ll gladly fight with yinyang and bot for cabby‼️‼️‼️

Alright thanks for listening to my Ted talk. Farewell, and do tell me on what you think if you have something to share :D

[beautifulsnake2162020]

Rambling Fan Review of the donghua Heaven Official's Blessing (English dub)

I just need to ramble for a bit after finishing the entire series (PLEASE TELL ME THERE IS A SEASON 3!).

Quick Quick review version: I LOVE IT even if I didn't read the novels yet. Highly recommended.

Quick review version: Why is this so underrated?! Would me fangirling about it make Season 3 to arrive faster? I GET THE HYPE NOW!

Actual review/rambling:

So just to be clear on a few things so that everyone is on the same page:

I deliberately chose the English dub once I saw it was an option because my brain needs to rest from all my academic readings and it was too tired to read the subtitles;

There is nothing professional about this review - it's just me writing all my feelings after crying on the closing montage of season 2. Considering that I was emotionally crying on the closing montage of Season 1, I don't know why I'm surprised at myself for doing the same on the Season 2 montage;

I read some spoilers from the wikia pages because I want to know if Hualian gets a happy ending or if I have to write one for them;

I am horny for James Cheek's Hua Cheng voice;

Having said that I am so impressed with his vocal chemistry with Howard Wang's Xie Lian. When I read the novels (when life finally allows me to do so), their voices will be the voices in my head for Hua Cheng and Xie Lian;

I watched some of Kictor's videos on TGCF , specifically this video but I stopped at around the 12 minute mark since I was confused at first midway on the first episode on who was supposed to be Xie Lian's love interest. I initially thought it was going to be a love triangle with Xie Lian being fought over. I was impatient and I needed to know just the background details. I can confidently say that I think this video helped me in clarifying some things and I think the emotional reveals still work;

I am very aware that there were certain scenes that needs to be changed because of China's censorship laws and that the novels have more leeway;

A part of my brain is already making outlines for fanfiction for Hualian; and

The most important point - It is okay to disagree with me. This is just my opinion on what touched me the most while watching the story unfold.

Okay now to the fangirl rambling:

As I type this to the youtube loop of Red Supreme by Hu Xia I've got a lot of positively emotional feelings.

I LOVE how their love story unfolds. How they save each other and they complement each other so well.

I especially love how the story within itself shows why Hualian loves each other even though they may not expressly say it but it is so obvious from their actions to each other and their internal monologue that we are given every now and then.

Season 1 is about showing that Hua Cheng's reason for existing is his love for Xie Lian.

Season 2 is about showing why Hua Cheng's feelings are from genuine love for Xie Lian.

If anything their love story teaches an important lesson: Hope doesn't have to be perfect to be effective.

At the start of Season 1, everyone in Heaven has given up hope on Xie Lian being nothing more than a waste of space who has the audacity to ascend three times and it seems like everyone except Ling Wen who after informing him of his debt because of the damage his latest ascension caused was able to help him get a task to quickly get more credit to pay off the debt (to be honest I still don't really understand the currency of Heaven but maybe that's kinda the point that the story is trying to make in that in a place supposedly of paradise this should be ridiculous. Mortals believing themselves reaching heaven will grant them freedom only to be subjected to the current system in place). And it is this little piece of hope that leads him to Hua Cheng who is the very proof that he has managed to greatly affect someone by giving them hope when they wanted to give up. Xie Lian may think later on that he might have said something ridiculous but to Hua Cheng who wanted to commit suicide, his very existence is the hope he needed to change his perspective on life and it is because of Xie Lian telling him to make him the purpose of Hua Cheng's life that Hua Cheng finally got to live. Even if now he is a ghost, from the brief time he actually truly lived life, that experience showed him what are the things that matters the most. And him achieving greatness in the form of being one of if not the most dangerous calamity that Heaven had to face. So much so that he has killed 33 Gods and has gained a reputation of being someone who is essentially the God killer. He did all of this because Xie Lian saw him in a time when no one wanted to see Hua Cheng, much more help him. This is mirrored in Ban Yue who kept the hope that Xie Lian gave her when he shared with her his dream of saving the world. Something he is later embarrassed about but it was enough for her to do her best to change things, even when it involved the massacre within the city walls. And once again this is shown in Lang Qianqiu to whom Xie Lian was a mentor to (I forgot the word they used for mentor but you get what I mean), when he taught him that it is not the royal family but the people that makes a nation thrive and this lead to Qianqiu leading a peaceful reign and united the nations of Xianle and accomplishing what several others had hoped for.

And this is where these relationships begin to act as a foil to show why the Hualian relationship works.

Ban Yue was misguided and did not have enough experience to trust in herself to know the difference between right and wrong and the subtly gray area in between. While influenced by Pei Jr, she also isn't wrong for saying that she also had some responsibility. But she thinks that the beatings she took in her afterlife is her penance for what she did on that day. It was self-destructive because while she may not say it out loud a part of her feels like she deserves to be treated badly after what she has done. And it was only after they saved her - that she begins to start moving on.

When Xie Lian started to become a God that was hated, he was also self-destructive and feeling like maybe he did deserve it. It was during this time that Hua Cheng still in his mortal lifetime declared that he will never forget Xie Lian. While this may or may not have influenced Xie Lian into moving on from any past mistakes, we do know that he may have not confronted any negative feelings enough that he still has a mental breakdown when the truth is revealed to Lang Qiangqiu. And so Hua Cheng provided Xie Lian that space and person to not be alone while confronting these feelings and thoughts all the while also reassuring Xie Lian that he is not a bad person for what he has done.

Speaking of being viewed as a bad person, we also come to the flaw of Lang Qiangqiu's perspective on Xie Lian. Both Lang Qiangqiu and Hue Cheng admired Xie Lian for saving them and wanted to be like their savior. But there is a difference: Lang Qiangqiu despite having more interactions with Xie Lian as his student, grew up idolizing him so much that he did not notice that the image he made of Xie Lian in his head is either a savior who could do no wrong or the traitor who killed his family and all of their lessons and experiences together were lies so that Xie Lian could kill his entire family. This simplistic reduction of Xie Lian which had carried out even in Lang Qiangqiu's life as a martial God, is not the true Xie Lian who was somewhere in between. Seeing him as nothing more than a savior prevents him from thinking of the times when Xie Lian was the killer rather than the savior. And seeing him as nothing more than a traitor would make him blind in the things that Xie Lian was genuinely trying to teach him to make him better than generations before.

Meanwhile Hue Cheng only had a few but significant interactions with Xie Lian that doesn't simply reduce Xie Lian as either one or the other. He knows enough to know that Xie Lian is altruistic and would do anything that would make the world better. Whether that was disrupting a procession in his honor to save a bandaged child from being killed from a fall or what seems to be the massacre of the Yong An royal family with only the heir remaining, he knows Xie Lian has enough reason to do the things that he did, though he may not know all the facts of the story. And to talk with the God he loved when said God was feeling hopeless and was in despair because people now hate him and are destroying his temples made Hue Cheng realize that even Gods feels remorse, upset, tired, and hopeless. I think this is the moment that Hue Cheng truly becomes devoted to Xie Lian. I forgot who in the Hualian tumblr community said it but I have to agree that this very human moment of Xie Lian being in despair is the catalyst in Hue Cheng's life to be the person whom the God he loves could turn to when he needs support from someone. And what better support could a God have than the most devoted follower that would become the most dangerous and notorious Ghost King among the four calamities. Him being a ghost is also the very thing that ensures Xie Lian continues to exist. These two interactions he has had was enough to not paint a simple picture of Xie Lian in Hue Cheng's mind which allowed him more than Lang Qiangqiu more contemplation on Hue Cheng's part on who the actual Xie Lian is while also allowing room to get to know him more.

Add this to how he is disgusted by how Heaven is for allowing Xie Lian to be taken for granted and which made him realize that beneath the beautiful veneer it is still a system which seems to hinder rather than actually help both Gods and mortals alike - being the most powerful and dangerous Ghost to warrant being a threat to Heaven truly was the best option for Hue Cheng.

And I know this has already been said but it is beautiful that even now in the early stages of their relationship both of them wants to be there for each other. Xie Lian was always there in some form or another for Hue Cheng and Hue Cheng is always there for Xie Lian no matter what disguise or form he takes. They both complement each other's weaknesses. Xie Lian tends to overthink and sometimes doesn't allow himself to truly feel because of his religious sect. Hue Cheng while also calculating tends to take action more because of either efficiency or boredom. Xie Lian apologizing to Hue Cheng for giving him half-truths and thinking about the damages he caused while Hue Cheng apologizes for wounding Xie Lian was so beautiful in that they both love each other to think they deserve retribution from the other when it is so obvious they want their relationship to be repaired.

Hue Cheng is the one being that Xie Lian could truly be himself with and Xie Lian is the one being that keeps Hue Cheng living even though he himself is no longer mortal. And that is such a beautiful love story.

[meelkieyap]

Nosferatu yap by Mee

This wants to be half a yap and half a personal analysis about Eggers' movie. Basically, I just want to write about things that surprised me or interested me in the movie (and script), because I really liked it.

Many pics and very long yap below. Spoiler warning ofc.

Intro

So first things first, me and my friend like to hang out. We like to go to the cinema, grab the most isolated seats and comment on every single scene for the fun of it; things often get chaotic. This time, the random movie we picked was Nosferatu.

As I always do, I never watch trailers of the movies we go see. Either I already know what I'm about to watch or I just like to form an opinion for myself without being influenced by the internet. The literal only thing I knew was it was a horror movie and my friend added there was romance too. I honestly don't enjoy either of these genres, so I just expected to chitchat with my friend the entire time.

ooo was I wrong!

The first part of the movie was kinda slow but I appreciated that in some way. I really enjoyed how elusive the Count is made to be when Thomas first encounters him. Him appearing and disappearing, and the scenes being somewhat chaotic and confused really make you feel like you're also being toyed by Orlok's vampiric powers.

On the other hand I couldn't wait for things to evolve and see some more danger. And I got what I asked for, cause without even realizing it, I watched with an open mouth all the second part.

Since I really like people, I'll start talking about Nosferatu's characters.

The Characters/Actors

Ellen

I am in love with her. I've never seen this actress before but, goddamn, me and my friend were HOOKED by her performance. She made Ellen even more interesting in my eyes. Especially in the second part of the movie when she goes full bonkers, she's desperate and very much possessed.

I really like how her character is written; she seems like your typical (sigh) background weepy woman at first, but then you can really see how she's the indiscussed protagonist of the story. She knows exactly what to do and when to do it, while the rest of the cast still has to learn the ABC before trying to act against Orlok and fail. The real enemy of the story is the lack of trust in her words anyone has. I think the professor is the key point for her to also start believing in her abilities and take her final choice. *loud handclapping noise*

Friedrich

Friedrich! MY BOY! As soon as he was introduced, I screamed!!!!! I already knew the actor from Bullet Train, so it was such a pleasant surprise to see him. I was also very pleased he had a mustache again, cause yeah, I'm a big mustache enjoyer (for people who know my Mumbo Jumbo design, it is heavily based on Tangerine oops).

I heard online that some people think the actor made Friedrich character annoying, but??? The guy just really doesn't wanna know anything about occult and wanna stay out of all the shit. Is that an 'annoying' trait or a cowardly one? I was honestly laughing a bit about his 'fuck this shit I'm out' behaviour throughout the movie cause he just proceeded to be in even more shit every time. He also has the saddest, most pathetic ending ever. Rest In Piss.

Von Franz

As I briefly said before, I think he's the very key to Ellen discovering how to trust herself. Finally, someone came by and gave her the answers she had been searching for all this time, never once telling her what she should or shouldn't do. Von Franz knows how she has to handle things but lets her explore and choose on her own.

SIEVERS She will rave all the night. VON FRANZ Then rave she must! There is a dread storm rising!

Moreover, he really has that 'excited Heimerdinger' vibe about him that I quite enjoy. I especially saw it in this scene where he closely examines the rat bites on the corpse. This guy passionately studied the occult for years and now that he finds someone like Ellen, he's thrilled about it. Despite his funky enthusiasm, he's the one taking the situation most seriously (a classic move I always like).

He also has a mustache. +100 points.

Count Orlok

You know who else has a mustache? Hell yeah, our 'little' critter Orlok!

As I was watching the movie, I just casually enjoyed his mustache. After, I discovered Eggers rightfully based his character on real Transylvanian noblemen and I loved it even more. I am completely on board with the once-handsome, barely-walking, rotting corpse of a vampire. YES. And even though he's horrid and putrid, he doesn't fail to somehow fascinate Ellen (and me by the way). I believe the way Orlok is written and interpreted is really on point. Eggers' Orlok really rolls a nat20 on charisma.

Prior to this, I only knew Orlok from the 1922 Nosferatu and the guy looked rather silly and goofy, not at all ideal for Eggers version of the story. May my cinema professor excuse me for not doing my homework then (watching and analizing 1922 Nosferatu); I'll make sure to do it shortly. Better late than ever, right?

Other characters

The others didn't really impress me if not for the costumes. I don't think they're bad characters or anything; I know what purpose they all serve, but they just didn't obsess my mind as much.

Like paintings

Leaving behind the carefully knitted story, the movie itself is visually a work of art, no matter the crudeness of the scene.

The use of black and white for when there's Orlok's influence is a smart move and it also brings you back to that 'old movie' vibe. In the first part of the movie, especially, even Ellen's movents feel classic.

Here are some of my favourite frames. Excuse the annoying site label;;

And the final scene in its entirety

Top ten anime betrayals right there, by the way.

This very last literal painting that closes the movie reminded me of Hannibal crime scenes, and above that, I really think I've never seen a better ending than this. Really breathtaking.

The End

Thanks for reading, hope your brain is also rotting like mine for Nosferatu. Bye!

[frogletscribe]

A:FoP Sky Breaker DLC Thoughts...

Alright so i finished the main story of the DLC and have let my thoughts cook for a minute. This is just some of my thoughts/opinions overall. I will have to do a separate post for my more intense thoughts because I managed to actually hit the character limit and I wasn't even halfway through everything (i didn't even know tumblr had one of those and I've been on here for over a decade)

Spoilers for Avatar: Frontiers of Pandora Sky Breaker DLC under the cut.

The opening? Gorgeous. Amazing. Fantastic. Obsessed with the little cut scene of our Sarentu on their Ikran. I am in love. I was really pleasantly surprised to see Kin right off the bat too! Thats my grandpa, i love him! And then walking with the Zakru and getting to hear other NPCs talking was really nice. I loved the banter about So'lek.

Getting into the main games camp was visually very pretty but confusing. I got lost immediately (distracted by the wandering Zakru) and accidently came in from the back? and then proceeded to not be able to find anything or anyone. I kept getting turned around and winding up back with Etuwa and Ka'nat. I did eventually find everyone else but it was a struggle.

Was Eetu only there at the very start??? He was hanging out with So'lek and having a very cute banter and then as everything progress he completely disappeared. Sosul too for that matter. It made me a little worried when he wasn't there after a while bc it felt like almost all the other key npcs got at least a small cameo in other quests but not Eetu? I got paranoid he died but also i think hes an important enough NPC that someone else would have said something if that was the case. I guess i just wanted more of him in general. (Im biased/delusional and ship him with my Sarentu, i will take literally anything)

Theres also a smaller moment, walking around where Teylan calls and starts talking about Nor, about how he would have loved the games, that really got me. For a second i actually thought Nor might come back later in the story, but given how things went it makes sense that he wouldnt. I do really hope that Nor shows up in the next DLC because I really need closure for him. He deserves to see and be a part of what his fellow Sarentu are building and to heal from all the hurt he has been through.

Can the Zeswa PLEASE catch a break? 😭 First the arches are collapsed, then Pasuk, now this?? I need this to be the last big bad thing that happens to them for a while.

More So'lek all the time please! I love him. I loved his role in the over all story and how he helps us throughout the final mission. He is the reason i am desperate for a romance in this game, but i can't have that so i'll just have to write it myself fhdjskghfs

I will be making a separate post about my thoughts on everything with Alma and Mokasa.

With the last of TAP (more or less) gone now, I'm really curious about the next DLC and the general future of Frontiers. Secrets of the Spires comes out in Fall, which is rapidly approaching, but i doubt we will hear anything until like September at the earliest. I think I remember hearing about a new clan in the new area for that one?? (Could be wrong though) Im really curious what the plot for that one is gonna be now that Mercer and Harding are gone.

Hopefully we will see Nor again. I'm kinda also hoping for a movie cameo? like Norm or Max showing up? We got an audio cameo of Ardmore, i think it'd be cool to see some friendly faces or at least audio for one of those guys. I don't think we will get a Jake cameo but i would lose my mind if we did lol.

Im also really hoping that theres more content coming in the future? More DLC or comics or something cause AFoP is the only thing keeping me sane when it comes to Avatar Brainrot rn.

[bee-named-alex]

Ok so ep7 of iwtv s2. One of the notes i wrote down as i was watching was "fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. nope. just nope. jesus fucking christ don't you dare do this" so you can imagine how i felt. Spoilers.

Ok ok. So I'm so fine rn you don't even know how fine I am. I didn't cry even though I expected to, I was more like empty, which might be even worse (read: better) lol

I'll start with a few quick thoughts, before I get into the bigger things. For the first like 10 minutes I couldn't stop thinking about how great Lestat (Sam) looks like im sorry. Him uncovering the homophobe's filth back at him? 10/10.

The actors are just so- perfect I have to say. Like we don't know what's true and I probably shouldn't believe anything just to be safe, but I found myself believing them everything. Also the whole time I wanted to hate the audience but they think it's just a play and if I, with all the other knowledge, find myself drawn to believe obvious lies, it's not really their fault that they do too.

Let's start with Lestat then. I was so glad to finally see the "real" (not really, even Sam said so) Lestat again

I haven't read the books (and even if i did i know that they change things) so idk how they made him testify because I just don't think he would. Maybe they tortured and forced him, "gave him a choice", maybe he was planning on saving them. Or maybe he just actually was out for vengeance i just don't know.

"You cannot script a hurricane" yeah you can't I loved that him going of script threw Santiago off so much, lmao (like he literally said "I'm about to violate the 5th law" aka kill Lestat I love that. Lestat is such a little shit.)

And when he went of script he told the truth (or as close to truth as we got during the trial i feel). Yes he also did break the laws. I like that he didn't let Santiago manipulate the audience to sympathize with him (don't get me wrong, it's not that he didn't want them to sympathize with him, he just wanted to manipulate them himself lol)

His and Louis' first eye contact (at around 11 minutes I believe) literally broke my heart.

When he talks about the loneliness I can't help but feel sorry for him.

I found it honestly hilarious when he was recounting their whole history backwards, like bitch please, it literally happened the other way arounf. Idk why it was just so funny how he was blatantly lying.

But then when they fully revisited the scenes from last season my jaw dropped.

So firstly Claudia's turning... I am so confused by it. Because it's obviously different from what we saw last time - and the scene itself is so moving. I mean Louis begging Lestat on his knees like he's some god and trying himself and failing and Lestat doing it for him even tho he knows it's a terrible idea. But the confusing part - in Dubai Louis rn says that Lestat's trial version is better than his and that he didn't want to believe it at the trial but now he knows it to be more true.

But like last season, so like 2 weeks ago, he told his own version?? Did he not realize until now, that he's talking about the trial, that he doesn't believe it? Did he lie on purpose but change his mind, is he lying now? Does Armand have to do something with it again? Tf is happening.

And then the fight. Again it's different but this time I remember that we didn't actually see this part of the fight so it could technically be true?? I don't really know rn how big of a part we didn't see last time. But maybe the truth about the fight is somewhere in the middle.

Amazing scene nonetheless, again, if I didn't know shit, I too would 100 % believe Lestat to be the victim. Up until the drop, that is extreme either way.

And Lestat going fully of script here, and his tears and his regret and his voice trembling and I'm sure that he means it. It wasn't a part of the performance. Sam Reid, the actor that he is, fuck.

It is just wo so great, like these new versions we get by Louis telling the story of Lestat showing him the story (which Louis already told us very differently) and on top of that anything could be misremembered. Or edited Armand. Unreliable narration at it's best.

Ok so Armand. "I could not prevent it" Fuck you. No sorry I might be a little harsh but yea no actually I'm not.

First the thing with Nicki and how he was "helped"... Armand got rid of him to have Lestat to himself and now he's doing the same with Claudia and Madeleine to have Louis.

Him having to watch is brutal and I believe his emotions but not his words. It was terrible to watch sure and painful and he didn't want it to happen... but he still sold them out?

He saves Louis. And it's amazing, the fear for his love in his face as he does it. He says it took all his strength and sure. But he could've saved them all. He can literally stop time. Ok maybe not but I for sure think he could've done it.

And rn in Dubai he's trying to convince himself or Louis or Daniel or maybe everyone that it wasn't his fault. But Daniel seems to not believe him (and calls his shit out a few times, good for him). And he's also making Lestat be more of a villain then he is I think (he would not do nothing when watching Claudia's death I'm sorry, that's his daughter.)

Claudia and Madeleine. My heart broke. They were doomed from the begginning. It didn't matter if they fought or not, it didn't matter their love or that they were right, it didn't matter that Madeleine was innocent and Claudia justified (maybe) in her crimes.

It didn't matter that Claudia was right -"We poisoned him, he's fine now. I can also cry and say I'm sorry"- because yes this was exactly true.

Claudia's final request (and Lestat giving it to her and then looking almost proud?? after she says it) and promise of death to all the people who doomed her and Madeleine.

And her rage. "It was never about me" and that's also true and yet she dies because of it. Tragic.

Madeleine's "My coven is Claudia" is just pure love and again it's what dooms her and again it's fucking tragic.

Watching the execution I couldn't breath really. Hurts still. And I don't believe Armand's version of the story though. Not that he tried but couldn't save them, not that Lestat didn't even try.

Louis, poor Louis. Living with guilt and sorrow isn't easy and he's living through it again now. And he can't even trust his own memories. I need him happy. He's not gonna be but I need him to be.

Also his live burial?? like fuck. That was vile. Like we know that he is fine now but still.

Previews. Santiago will die and if he doesn't I will kill him. Louis is a pyromaniac (yay), I'm ready for the whole coven to burn.

From the trailers we didn't yet see the bookshelves falling on Daniel so it has to be next episode. Also we didn't yet see the Loustat hug and I don't think it's what happens after the trial, especially not with Louis coming to kill Lestat, so that would mean it has to have happened later (Dubai maybe? I mean we do need Lestat's side of the story next season so we could get him now.)

[leucrotta]

Werewolf Watch #1

First of all, Happy New Year, and welcome to the first installment of Werewolf Watch! (Thanks to @7outerelements for the name/tag suggestion.) I’ve taken all the films on my radar and made a numbered list, then used a generator to give me a random one. Today’s werewolf movie is…

SCREAM OF THE WOLF (1974)

There isn’t much information out there about 1974’s Scream of the Wolf. It was a made-for-TV movie, apparently based on a short story by writer David Case, and the screenplay was penned by one of my favorite authors, Richard Matheson. And… that’s about it! No charming production anecdotes, no fun trivia, just: here it is. Doesn’t bode well, does it? Even Matheson’s involvement isn’t necessarily a good sign; while he did write some iconic Twilight Zone episodes and the classic novella I Am Legend, he also wrote Jaws 3-D, so there’s that. Going in, I really have no idea what to expect, but I’m kind of thinking it won’t be great.

The film’s premise follows a retired big game hunter as he returns for another hunt, this time tracking a rogue killer wolf. Or is it a wolf??? Only one way to find out…

(Please be aware that this review WILL contain spoilers!)

The Plot

We open on a neat transition, from some animal’s eyes in the darkness to headlights piercing the fog. An unfortunate man has found himself in the first five minutes of a horror movie, meaning he probably doesn’t have a long shelf-life.

Yeah. His car breaks down on a lonely road at night, and he’s forced to go looking for help. But instead he finds… Something! A snarling creature (that we naturally don’t see) chases him back to his car before smashing its way in and somehow bloodlessly mauling him to death.

Seemingly the entire police force soon arrives on scene, accompanied by some bizarre and funkadelic music. Even after the sheriff (it sounds like his name is Brian?) fetches his retired hunter friend (our protagonist, John,) no one can determine the identity of the killer beast. It’s almost as if its tracks, and its scent, have changed to avoid detection.

And thus we have the general setup for our werewolf story. Twice more we’re treated to hapless expendables wandering around in the dark, and twice more we don’t get to see the monster that so consistently removes their faces. In between these extremely tame death scenes, we see the confused John and his sheriff buddy (is his name Brian? I’m starting to doubt myself) scratching their heads. It’s the typical creature feature cycle: the beast kills, the investigators are stumped. Maybe eventually they’ll wise up and realize that there’s something Extra about this supposed “animal”, but not for most of the runtime. In this regard, Scream of the Wolf is fairly standard, and I prepared myself for another paint-by-numbers werewolf film. But luckily, the movie had a bit of an ace up its sleeve. And that ace’s name is Byron.

Byron is John’s longtime friend and fellow (non-retired) hunter, and he is absolutely unhinged.

That’s his face for most of the movie. Just that same, smarmy expression. Byron refuses to assist his ole buddy John, insisting he’s “too busy”, but that does the opposite of keeping him out of the story. At a chance meeting in a restaurant, Byron encounters what I can only describe as a 1970s caricature of a vegan, who asks him what he gets out of killing innocent, cute little animals. “I can’t tell you,” says Byron, “but I can show you”, eliciting this very goofy response:

I’m pretty well convinced that, had John not intervened, Byron would’ve happily chased this man around the restaurant with a steak knife. He kind of has a hard-on for killing and death, and he really, really wants everyone else to know about it. The actor here, Clint Walker, is an incredible delight.

He perfectly nails Byron’s thin (and ever-cracking) veneer of civility over a gaping maw of complete and utter insanity. From his speech to his gestures, you can just tell at a glance that this dude is always 0.5 seconds away from biting the nearest person, with or without provocation. And speaking of bites...

John’s love interest, Sandy, is convinced that Byron is the killer. (Probably because he continues to say incredibly psychotic things in her presence.) And not only that, he’s also... a werewolf! She cites an old story about he and John’s last hunt together, where Byron was bitten by an enormous wolf. Suspicious. As if to reinforce her fears, she becomes the next would-be victim, saved only by the timely (and confusing) arrival of the police, who scare off the beastly intruder. She repeats her suspicions to the sheriff (VERNON, his name is apparently Vernon) who decides to confront the hunter at home.

Naturally, Byron denies all of these claims, and continues to refuse to help. This time he’s a bit more honest about his motivations; he’s actually enjoying all of this chaos. The townspeople, he says, are more alive now than they’ve ever been. This is definitely a good and healthy thing, believe him. It is at this point that a new suspect is rather intrusively crammed into the narrative: Brant Grant, Byron’s servant (?). Who is… there.

The trouble in town soon escalates, as the sheriff is killed while staking out Byron’s place- wait no, that’s actually just a deputy. The lighting is very bad, okay? A townhall meeting is held. The funky music returns, briefly and inexplicably. John gives Byron one last chance to help, and therefore shirk the allegations of werewolfery. Byron refuses, and reveals just a little more of his thought process: if he helps out, it will make the hunt too easy. He’d rather let John do it himself, perhaps regaining that old thirst for (animal) murder that he once had. They arm wrestle over it. Why? No one knows. Brant Grant is just kind of there again. Despite John losing the arm wrestling match, Byron does eventually show up to assist, on what is to be the last night of the hunt. The two split up, foolishly disobeying D&D rules, and John hears a gunshot, followed by snarling. He runs to aid his old friend, but alas, he is too late! Byron has been attacked, and lies dead. Now John knows that Brant Grant is the killer, and he goes to Byron’s place to confront him- only to find… Byron?!?!

Yeah, Byron’s not dead. Turns out the body was Brant/Grant, which John would have known if he had bothered to turn it over or like, do any sort of investigating. But he didn’t, and now Byron has him at gunpoint. He at last explains his dastardly scheme, in which he manufactured the “werewolf” attacks using a wolf and/or dog that he trained to kill, and some fake footprints. He did it for the same reason he’s already revealed: he wanted John to once again be his peak hunting self, and he wanted the local populace to finally be “alive”.

In the film’s climax, Byron challenges John to one last hunt: in the forest, he will find two bullets. One for the dog, and one for Byron, who will be hunting him in turn. He gets a five minute head start, but it’s barely enough. John manages to dispatch the wolf and/or dog, but he’s wasted both bullets in the attempt. It’s time for a little mano a mano. Of course, as the arm wrestling scene proved, John isn’t as fit as he once was, and Byron is able to easily take him down. “You lose, John,” he says, triumphantly.

At which point John pulls out his SECRET GUN!!!

Turns out he planned this whole final night, knowing Byron would want to have a hunt-off, and baiting him into it. After all, he says, repeating the film’s Important Phrase: “the prey will always do the unexpected”. Defeated at his own game and not very happy about it, Byron turns to go. He knows John won’t be able to shoot an unarmed man in the back. He is sure and incorrect. John kills Byron, finally ending the murder spree, and thus the movie.

The Review

So! That sure was a wild ride, huh? In the end, Scream of the Wolf isn’t technically a werewolf movie at all, but that isn’t actually a bad thing. At the start, I had assumed a very by-the-book, possibly lackluster tale of werewolf hunting, only to be served something fairly decent and certainly different. The movie is competent, especially for a made-for-TV special. The acting (at least the two leads) is believable, and the characters (at least Byron) are interesting. The twist is very much Matheson’s, echoing his earlier works (including one of my favorite of his short stories) as well as other classics like The Hound of the Baskervilles. That’s not to say it’s without its issues.

While the end of the film is a solid “most dangerous game” type situation, it does end up being one (or two, or three) too many twists. Byron’s dead, so he can’t be the killer! Oh wait, actually Brant Grant is dead, and Byron is the killer! John’s sure to lose this climactic fight, but oh wait, he’s actually got the upper hand and planned this all along! The shoehorning in of Brant Grant as a suspect was also pretty obviously a red herring, and needed to come in much, much earlier. There were times when Byron’s obsession sort of waffled between intimidating and goofy. In terms of technical aspects, the film’s many, many night scenes were far too dark to make out anything happening, and the dialogue was at times difficult to understand.

I’m not sure whether the randomly funky soundtrack should count as a good thing or a bad thing, so we’ll just leave it as neutral.

Overall, I found myself pleasantly surprised by this not being a dumpster fire of a movie. It had a coherent plot, decent acting, consistent characters, and that nice twist ending. I can’t say it was great by any stretch of the imagination, but it was quite alright.

I’ve decided to give Scream of the Wolf (1974) a 6 out of 10.

Werewolf Effects

This is where I’d put my thoughts on the movie’s werewolf costume, makeup, or animatronics, as well as the transformation scene… IF I HAD ANY!!!

But seeing as how this movie didn’t have a real werewolf, there’s not much to say here. Does Byron count as the film’s werewolf? Let’s just put the image gallery from Rotten Tomatoes here because it made me laugh.

Werewolf Lore

Again, there isn’t much to say here on this particular film. Not much lore was described throughout; the “werewolf” came out at night, mauled people, and was thought to have been created by a wolf bite. All pretty in line with old lycanthropy tales, which didn’t typically mention moon phases. It was more common for a folklore werewolf to be created by a deal with the devil, but a wolf bite isn’t out of the question. Here's an interesting tidbit: in the famous werewolf case of the Beast of Gevaudan, it is theorized by some that the killings were actually committed by a human with a trained animal. Coincidence? Probably yes, but it's a fun comparison.

Final Thoughts

Would I recommend this movie? Sure, if you’ve got nothing better to watch. There are better films out there, certainly, and they aren’t hard to find. But hey, it’s short (about 1 hour 10 minutes), it’s free on tubi, and it’s not terrible, so there’s that. While it isn’t an instant classic, I am surprised to find that it has generally bad reviews, and that it was never popular. It at least deserves better than that.

Scream of the Wolf was remade in 2022, and that version is also on the watch list. Someday perhaps, we shall see if it’s any better.

And that's all for the first Werewolf Watch! If you have any suggestions or comments, feel free to leave them on the post or message me directly. Still working out the kinks here, but it's just for fun, so keep that in mind.

Thanks for reading!

[ghouly-boiiiii]

My Name Is Cooper

Chapter 8 As Confused as a Fart in a Fan Factory

(Lucy x Cooper Howard / The Ghoul)

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Tags: angst, fluff, romance, humor, banter, femdom, alcohol and drug use, masturbation, edging, eventual smut, soft Cooper, Lucy had a crush on Cooper Howard, Lucy finds out The Ghoul is Cooper Howard, Lucy gets drunk as hell, Chapter 8 is unhinged 😆, they dance like idiots, Lucy tries to bang Cooper drunk but Cooper is a gentleman, Cooper takes care of drunk Lucy

In this chapter…

“Oh, girl… you are drunk as hell.” He said and rose his brow. 

“I’m not that drunk. I can consent… Come on. Let’s fuck.” Lucy giggled as she struggled to keep her balance.

The Ghoul pinched the bridge of his nose as he snickered uncontrollably. 

“What? You didn’t think about it? When you had me all tied up?” She teased and put her hands up in front of her with her wrists together, the same way he’d had them tied before.

“Ho-leeee shit.”

“You can tie me up again, if you want.”

“Chkk… pffft….” The Ghoul threw his hand over his face and tried to hold back his laughter.

“What?”

“You gotta be fucking kidding me… Are you really like this?”

“What!?”

“Lil’-Miss-Goody-Two-Shoes is a fuckin’ nymphomaniac?”

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 2,729

SPOILER WARNING: Contains all the spoilers

No trigger warnings except eventual sexy time with a zombie man.

“Well, ain’t you ginchy.” The Ghoul said over the music.

Lucy jumped and spun around. “Oh! Geez!” Then started laughing drunkenly. “Hello, Mr. Ghouly Man!”

“...Did you drink my whisky?” He said, grinning as he tilted his head a bit. 

“Hey, this– this is my … ugh… whisky. Mister. I found this whisky. Me.” She said, pointing at herself and slurring her words. 

“Okay.” He stepped closer with an amused half-smile and a raised brow. “Well, may I?” He said, holding out his hand.

“Hmmm… no.” She said and huddled the bottle up in her arms.

The bounty hunter stepped up closer to her and waved his fingers. “Alright. Come on. Give it here.”

“Fine. You can have it.” She said, shoving it in his hand. “Except… except… I think it’s… gone.” She tilted her head and flashed him a wide, proud smile.

He looked down and shook the bottle. “Yep… that is one empty bottle a’ whisky…” Then back up at her. “But you know what that means, don’cha?”

She leaned back and narrowed her eyes, looking at him suspiciously. “...What?”

“That means I get to open up the tequila.” He said with a grin.

Lucy gasped in offense. “You have tequila!? …And you didn’t tell me!?”

The Ghoul scoffed. “Oh, you’ve probably neva’ been this drunk in yo’ whole life, have ya?” He snickered as he grabbed the bottle of said beverage out of his bag. 

She opened her mouth to protest, but stopped and scrunched up her face in consideration that he may be right.

He slumped down in the recliner and started opening the bottle. “You're cut off, sweetheart.”

“Hey! Y-you can’t do that!” 

“Nope. You’ve had enough.” 

“Excuse me! Who– who do you think you are, huh!? My dad!? ” She complained and let out a hiccup. “I helped find all that stuff… so I have a claim to my share! ” 

“Sure, I won’t argue with that…” The bounty hunter said, holding up a hand. “But as someone who has a lot, and I mean a lot , of experience bein’ both drunk as shit and around people who are drunk as shit, I am tellin’ you… If you don’t sit down and eat somethin’ and drink some fuckin’ water, you’re gonna be convulsin’ on the ground pukin’ yer guts out and pissin’ yourself. And I don’t think either of us want that.”

“Ohhh, you don’t want me puking and pissing myself? …That’s sweet.” She joked, poking her bottom lip out dramatically.

“Oh, you fuck off.” He said and took a drink of the tequila. 

Lucy let out a dramatic sigh and crossed her arms over her chest. “Ohh… fine. You can have the tequila.” 

“Oh. Well, thank ye.” He nodded. 

“But only if you dance with me.” She said with a grin.

The Ghoul flashed her a wide smirk as he took another drink. “Nah.”

“Come on! I feel weird being the only one dancing. You owe me, remember?” She came up to him and grabbed his arm and started to pull. “Get… up…!!”

And he let her, laughing amusedly as she struggled, casually sipping on the tequila. “No use, darlin'. I ain’t budgin’.”

“Nnnnn!!!!” Lucy put all her strength into it, leaning back and everything, but he was as stubborn as an actual rock.

“You really think a little thing like you can lift me?”

“That's it!” She dropped his arm, then started looking around. “Where’s your lasso?”

The Ghoul started laughing. “Whatchu gon’ do with that rope, sweetheart? You gon’ tie me up, is that it?”

“Yup!” Lucy paused to look down her nose at him. “ And I’m gonna make you drink pee water .” She huffed at him and continued looking. 

He snickered and flashed an amused half-grin. “Now, hold on. We haven’t even established a safe word yet.” 

Finally, she found the lasso and quickly started wrapping it around his wrist. 

“Oh- hoh . You ain’t playin’ around.”

“Nope!” She said, then slacked a couple feet of rope and started pulling. 

The bounty hunter chuckled and stood up, then started pulling the rope back towards him. It was a pretty unfair game of tug o’ war.

Soon, she was right in front of him. “I guess your little plan didn’t pan out so good.” He chuckled.

Lucy opened her eyes, and they got wide in surprise. “Ha! Got you!” She grinned, then dropped the rope and threw her hands onto his shoulders. “Now you can dance with me.”

The Ghoul’s eye twitched. And he thought he was being clever. “No, no. I’m not dancing.”

“Okay, fine. You don't have to dance with me. I'll just dance with you!” 

“And how does that work, darlin’?” 

“Like this!” She grabbed his arms and started flailing them around as she did a drunken jive. 

The bounty hunter could hardly contain himself. She was so ridiculous … And adorable . 

What was he going to DO?

“Lucy, you…” he said, laughing under his breath. 

“Come on, Asshole!” She said, lifting his arm above her and spinning around. “Dance!” 

He shook his head, then exhaled.

Oh, Hell. She probably wouldn't remember anyway. “You wanna see me dance?” 

“Yes!!” 

“Alright. I'll show you how to do The Madison proper.” He said, then broke into said dance. 

Lucy burst out laughing and tried to copy him, although she was, again, much less coordinated.

“You know the Hand Jive?” He asked and started doing that dance as well.

As the two of them continued to dance in their fluffy white robes, their dances became more improvised and silly. Soon, Lucy was doing odd, random moves and The Ghoul started copying her, causing her to burst into laughter. Dogmeat, despite her limp, even decided to join. Barking and jumping and trotting around in excitement. 

The old bounty hunter couldn't remember the last time he danced like this. The last time he even listened to music like this. Hell, he was actually having fun for the first time in… who knows how long.

As the dances got wilder, Lucy eventually lost her footing and started to fall, but he quickly caught her. “Whoa, there!”

“Ahh!” She yelped and started laughing. 

“You alright?” 

Suddenly, he found himself standing there with Lucy in his arms, clinging onto him for balance. Their bodies, nearly touching. She smiled up at him with eyes that he knew would never look at him that way sober. And he knew he was falling hard. 

“Yeah… I’m okay. Thanks.” Lucy said sweetly.

The Ghoul cleared his throat, then pulled away and started back towards the bottle of tequila. “Well… all this dancin’s got me thirsty.” 

“Phew! Me too!” Lucy said, catching her breath, then paused and tilted her head at him. “Hey… do you… wanna have sex?” 

The tequila expelled from his mouth before it could even hit the back of his throat. “ What!? ”

“Do you wanna have sex…?” She said casually, sounding confused at his reaction.

“...Huh?” He said, looking back at her with wide eyes and a slack jaw.

“I said, do you wanna have se–”

“What?”

“I said, do you wanna--”

“Huh?”

Lucy started laughing.

“What?” He kept going, both jokingly and in genuine disbelief.

She started to laugh harder.

The bounty hunter flashed her a half-grin and raised a brow. “The fuck did you say to me?”

“I said… I said… do you wanna…” She struggled to get words out through her drunken laughter.

“You’re not serious.”

“Of course I’m serious! Ya big meatball!” 

He let out a high-pitched snicker. “What’d you call me?”

“A meatball! Because that’s what you look like.”

The Ghoul blinked and smirked, then tilted his head. “...You wanna fuck a meatball?” 

She bent over laughing. “No! I wanna fuck you! You are the meatball!”

He snickered and sat down in the recliner. “Sweetheart, I think you’re confused.” 

“How am I confused? I’m not confused.”

“Oh, you’re confused.”

“I’m not confused.” She repeated.

“Oh, yes you are. You donno yo ass from your elbow right now.”

The former vault dweller burst out laughing again. “What did you say!?”

“You nuttier than squirrel turds.” 

Her laughter was nearly uncontrollable as he kept going. 

“You’re as confused as a fart in a fan factory.” 

“A fart in a fan fa…!!” She started wheezing.

“Wheels are still turnin’, but the hamster’s dead.”

Lucy keeled over and held up a palm towards him. “Stop! Please!” Then gasped for breath as she tried to control her laughter. “I can’t breathe!”

The Ghoul started laughing with her. It overjoyed him to see he was able to bring such light to her face. Although, he didn’t think he was that funny. But she was pretty drunk…

“You are so funny!” The young woman nearly wept from laughing, wiping her eyes. “I… I’ve never laughed this hard… in my whole life!” She gasped as she tried to compose herself. “Oh, God… I’m okay… I’m okay…” 

“Oh, girl… you are drunk as hell .” He said and rose his brow. 

“I’m not that drunk. I can consent… Come on. Let’s fuck.” Lucy giggled as she struggled to keep her balance.

The Ghoul pinched the bridge of his nose as he snickered uncontrollably. 

“What? You didn’t think about it? When you had me all tied up?” She teased and put her hands up in front of her with her wrists together, the same way he’d had them tied before.

“ Ho-leeee shit .” 

“You can tie me up again , if you want.”

“Chkk… pffft….” The Ghoul threw his hand over his face and tried to hold back his laughter. 

“What?”

“You gotta be fucking kidding me… Are you really like this?”

“What!?”

“Lil’-Miss-Goody-Two-Shoes is a fuckin’ nymphomaniac?”

“I’m just asking if you wanna have sex. That doesn’t make me a… whatever you said.”

“No, no… You’re too drunk. It ain’t right.”

“Oh, and whadda you care about what’s right and wrong?” She said with a huff. 

“Enough.” He said simply.

“Like I said. I’m not that drunk.”

“Oh, yes you are. You need to sit down and drink some water and eat somethin’.”

“Okay, I will... But about the sex.”

“Not happening.”

“I’m sober enough to consent."

“No.” 

“What if I do all the work? Then you could say I took advantage of you .” Lucy giggled.

“Ahh…” He sucked air in through his teeth, then looked down. “You don’t wanna fuck me, darlin’…”

“Why wouldn’t I wanna fuck you?” 

The Ghoul looked up at her, wondering what she meant by that. 

“You’re the only thing with a dick here, aren’t you?” She added.

Ahh… That hurt a little bit, for some reason. But he played it off. “Oh, you just want me for my cock, is that it?” He scoffed jokingly. 

The former vault dweller grinned, but it quickly faded. “You… do still have one, don’t you? Or did it fall off like your nose?”

“Actually, I got three . Mutations and all that, you know.” 

Her eyes got wide. “Three!?” 

He let out a hearty laugh and held up a hand towards her. “...Kidding, kidding...”

“But you do have one…” 

“I have one . Sorry to disappoint.”

“Well… I only have one vagina , so… that's enough for me .” She said with a confused shrug.

The bounty hunter laughed again, then rubbed his forehead with his thumb and index finger. “Sweetie… we’re talking about irradiated ghoul dick, here. I could make you very sick. You know that, don’cha?”

“What, like, radiation poisoning?” 

“Very likely.”

“Wait…” She leaned in, her brow furrowing seriously, which contrasted with the comical way she was slightly swaying back and forth. “...Can I have your baby? ”

“Hooohh, whoa, whoa, whoa.” The Ghoul said, and waved his hand in front of him. “Slow down, sweetheart. We ain't even married yet.”

“No, I mean…” She started to laugh lowly when she realized what he thought she meant. “I meant, can you get me pregnant? Like… are you… fertile? Can ghouls reproduce?”

He put a hand over his face. “Lord Almighty.” Then shook his head. “No, I don’t believe we can, sweetheart.”

“Oh, good. Then you don’t have to worry about getting me pregnant.” She grinned.

The bounty hunter squeezed his eyes shut, then pinched the bridge of his nose again as he shook his head, laughing. “Jesus Christ.”

Suddenly, Lucy slapped a hand over her mouth.

The Ghoul looked up quickly and his eyes got wide. “Sink.” He said and pointed.

She ran, barely making it as she emptied the contents of her stomach down into the kitchen drain. 

He quickly went over to her, gently pulling her hair back to get it out of the way. “I guess you had a little too much fun tonight, didn’t cha’, Vaulty?” He joked.

“BLEERGHHGHH!!!” Was her only answer. 

“Yep, that’s what I thought.” 

She heaved a few more times before it turned into coughing and heavy gasps for air. 

The bounty hunter exhaled as he watched her closely, then turned on the cold tap. “Try to get some water down ya.”

Lucy did as she was told, cupping her shaky hands and trying to get the water in her mouth. “Oh, God…”

“You’re alright.” He said, and found himself gently rubbing her back. The Ghoul didn’t even realize he was doing it at first. He thought about stopping, but decided not to. What did it matter? She was probably too drunk to remember this later anyway. His main focus was to give her comfort.

He waited for her to stop taking the water, then gently pulled on her shoulder. “You should lay down.” 

Shakily, she nodded and let him guide her to the bed. The whisky had hit her fast and hard, and she suddenly needed help walking. 

“Oh, God… Jesus Christ…” She said as he laid her down on her back. 

He chuckled a bit. “You doin’ alright?” 

“I just… I feel… uh… Jesus… fuck…” 

“I donno if you can fuck him either, sweetheart. But good luck.” He joked, flashing her a grin as he pulled the sheet over her.

She blinked several times, then looked up at him, reaching up and grabbing his arm as he started to pull away. 

“...What is it?” He froze, and as he looked down at her, he could see the fear in her eyes.

“S-something’s wrong…”

“Hey, hey…” The Ghoul said softly, trying to be reassuring as he sat down on the edge of the bed next to her. “You’re just really drunk, sweetie. You’re alright.” 

She grasped his arm with both hands and shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. “No, I… I feel like I’m… dying …” 

“Your body’s just panicin’ a little ‘cause you ain’t ever get this drunk.” He said calmly and rose his brow. “Hey. Hey, now. Look at me.”

Lucy looked up at him, her eyes slightly damp.

“That’s right. You just focus on my ugly ass face.” The bounty hunter's smile was self-amused, but also warm. “You gon’ be just fine.” 

The former vault dweller cracked a smile and let out a light laugh. He laughed with her, and after a moment, she said, “It’s not so bad…”

He just smiled at her a moment. “You close yer eyes and try’da get some sleep now.”

“You’re… not gonna go anywhere… are you?” She said, looking worried.

“I’ll be right here, sweetheart...” He said softly. “I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

The former vault dweller gave him a warm and appreciative smile, before finally closing her eyes and immediately passing out. 

The Ghoul’s smile faded and he let out an exhale. He watched her face a moment while she laid there asleep, admiring her beauty. And after some hesitation, reached up and gently brushed her hair out of her face. 

Finally, he pushed himself up off the bed, very slowly as to not disturb her, then sat down in the recliner next to her.

After a moment, his eyes rested on her again, watching her chest move as she breathed. Then he shook his head in amusement before shifting them over to the television.

The former Hollywood actor swallowed hard, remembering what happened the last time he ran into one of these things, so he opted not to turn it on.

Instead, he gave Dogmeat a scratch on the head, then laid his head back and closed his eyes, deciding it would be best if he tried to get some rest as well.

To be continued...

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