#i need to change so much
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i need a reset & a refresh
#i need to change everything i do#even just the youtube videos i watch everyday#i wish i could find new ones but it is so hard it feels so small#i need new clothes#and a new body#and a new face#i need to change so much#i feel so gunked down n stuck#i want to do something#Anything#but im just stuck here in my room like i always have been#ive been trying so hard to look for a job n applying at so many more and . nowhere wants me man LMAO.. which isnt a surprise but still o(-<#everyone makes it sound so easy
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thoracic outlet syndrome and my disordered eating
The very first word I learned in my family's native, immigrant tongue was "fat." ‘Fei’. My mother would point to a lady walking down the grocery store aisle as she muttered the word under her breath, ‘fei’, eyeing the layers of fat hidden beneath the cloak of her dress. This was later followed with, "If you ever look like her one day, I will lock you in a cupboard and starve you for a week."
I know that my mom was bullied for her weight, and she was trying to save me from the same torturous fate.
I learned that the greatest act of kindness I could receive was to be starved into being thin. That was how she loved me.
At age 12, I began my first year of high school. I stood in the changing rooms, my nervous, skinny knees shaking as I tried on my school uniform. My extra-small polo shirt drowned me, and my sports shorts were dangerously close to slipping off. The canteen worker huffed out a sigh as she examined me. “I’m afraid we won’t have anything that fits her; she’s just so petite.”
My mother smiled, looking almost proud. “No, i'll just have to take it in.”
I learned that the greatest compliment I could receive was to be so small that anything I wear can engulf me, to be so small that I’m invisible.
At age 14, my body changed. I developed breasts. I grew up a dress size. My mother would jokingly call me “solid.” Compliments about my petite frame began to fade. When I laid on my back and my tummy went flat, I could no longer see my bones. I didn’t know why that made me so anxious. I lost the special “thigh gap” I was told others were so envious of, that I got to have. I watched my mother bounce from fad milkshakes to diets, to gym classes and workout videos. I watched her break down and cry.
I kept growing. One night, my father took away my dinner as I was halfway eating. He said with a chuckle, “That’s enough for you.”
I learned that there was nothing more shameful than gaining weight.
At age 15, I failed mathematics. It was tragic really, considering that I came from a family of doctors and university graduates; intelligence was in our DNA. What was my excuse? However, my brain was filled to the brim with song lyrics and the injustices of human trafficking and caged chickens, and too busy analysing Sylvia Plath’s poetry. So as hard as I studied, when asked to ‘find x’ in this equation, I could do no more than simply point to the letter and say “there!”
That was not good enough for my family. They removed me from my public education, convinced that if I was given more structure, resources, and discipline, away from my friends and the teachers who supported me, I would get better. When that proved fleeting, they suggested I move out entirely and live with my sister, to finish school away from them. They couldn’t handle my teenage emotions anymore.
It did not cross their minds to tell me that it was not personal, that it didn’t mean they loved me any less as they sought to abandon me.
I learned that the complex, colourful array of angsty emotions following loss, is just too difficult and messy for others. Nice, neat, black-and-white numbers are much more desirable.
At age 17, I lost my friends.
As formal grew closer, I set my eyes on the one thing that could make things feel right: looking good in my formal dress. I began to count calories. It was kind of like a game. I couldn’t solve equations, but adding and subtracting I could do. 300-calorie chicken salad + 100-calorie muesli bar. Subtract 300 calories from my run this morning to make you feel good.
I tried to make the game more challenging. 1000 calories turned to 900, 800, then 700. By the time I got to 500, I was going to bed with a chasm the size of the Grand Canyon in my belly and waking up seeing stars.
By the time formal came, I weighed 35 kgs.
I learned that when life gets out of control, I can always, ALWAYS control my weight. I can always rely on calorie counting. And nothing feels as satisfying as being hungry.
It is no wonder that I spent the next five years of my life yo-yoing between diets. Riding that eating disorder rollercoaster, the highs with Mia and the plummeting lows with Anna. I learned that a combination of saltwater and ice cream can make you throw anything up. That downloading pictures of cakes and staring at them can be just as good as eating the real thing. I worked hard to excel in every aspect of my studies and my job. To make my parents proud. And when life got hard, I simply stopped eating.
It took years to break out of that habit. To learn that the greatest value I have in my body is the strength she has to run and take me to places. To value my health more than a number on a scale. I learned that my body was more than a vehicle for weight loss and self-destruction.
With my arms and hands, I learned how to play the violin and reach the most magical state of flow, where I not only stopped time but controlled time with every note I played. I could achieve the greatest highs by running and jumping and twirling in the air. With my body, I learned how to express love and joy. I learned how to make others laugh and cry from a stage in a packed theatre. I learned that my body was meant for more than to simply be skinny. It was meant for love.
I learned to nourish and fuel this body to sustain the health and strength she needed. I learned to eat intuitively. I stopped playing the numbers game and got rid of my scales. I exercised for fun and not for punishment. Most importantly, I found a career that could help me help others value the health and strength that their body has and to nurture it too.
Since being diagnosed with thoracic outlet syndrome and this disability, I have lost everything. My arms no longer have the strength to play music or create magic or communicate love or propel me to fly or make others laugh. If my body was a temple, it has been ravaged and desecrated in the most heinous way.
No punishment could ever fit the crime of what was done to me. And the worst part is, I did this to myself.
I used to channel all the focus, drive, ambition, and discipline I had with every calorie I counted, towards my goals and dreams, my ambitions, my talents, and my hobbies. The things that made me amazing. The things that made me belong. The things that made me real. There is nothing more painful than being forced to watch your temple crumble around you, bringing down with it everything you loved and worked so hard to build. It should come as no surprise that without these things to work towards, I started counting again.
I’ve lost weight again. I rediscovered old numbers again. Never mind the fact that I’m 2 kg away from being clinically underweight, my doctor seemed pleased when she saw my numbers. There is something about the ED diagnosis that stands out from every other clinical disorder we have in the DSM. It’s ego-syntonic for a reason. It’s really one of the only mental health disorders you can be praised (implicitly so) for having. My life is falling apart. But no matter, because according to everyone else, “I still look so good.”
I am diagnosed with a diagnosis that has no cure and a very poor prognosis and a treatment that might kill me, physically, psychologically, and spiritually, only to get a recurrence of this diagnosis again and again and again. Losing all control cannot begin to describe this feeling.
Somehow, I have convinced myself that everything will be okay, as long as I. Don’t. Gain. Weight. After all, I may be in a great deal of pain and unable to do anything that meant anything to me, but at least I have a hot body. That is what I am told. “You certainly don’t look like you’re unwell. You don’t look like you haven’t been able to work out. You look great.”
I want to scream.
I know I need to eat again to gain the strength to face the challenges ahead. But I can’t stop thinking… it’s bad enough that you have a disability, do you need to be fat too?
Nothing forces you to challenge every core belief you have and learn how to love yourself unconditionally more than gaining a disability can.
#What people don't know is that I would gain all the weight in the world if I could have my health back again#Thoracic outlets syndrome#Thoracic outlet syndrome#Disability#disordered eating#please don't worry I'm seeing a psychologist and I am actually trying to work on this#I'm also going to work and eating again. I called the butterfly foundation and had a good cry. The lady I spoke to was so nice#Feel more comfortable referring people to them#Butterfly foundation#Healing#nothing forces you to learn unconditional love more than having a disability#tos#I just wanna play the violin man#Grief and loss#I think my psychologist is trying to help me to just love myself for being me and apparently I'm amazing anyway#Like I think I know this on some level#But also no#what people don't understand is that I was not taught to love that way#Loving that way makes no sense to me#Unconditional makes no sense to me#Doesn't everything have conditions#Is not every form of love a transaction?#TOS-and-her-musings#i also have some pretty bad fatphobic and abelist thoughts#ingrained within me#i need to change so much#chronic pain
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tshirt that says NO LIVE ORGANISM CAN CONTINUE FOR LONG TO EXIST SANELY UNDER CONDITIONS OF ABSOLUTE REALITY
#i literally JUST finished hill house a few days ago and i already want to reread. Badly. it's sooo so so soo sooooooooo good <33333!!!!!#also completely enamored by shirley jackson's writing style i NEED to read everything she has written ever like right now..#opening lines of ALL TIME btw 👆❗❗❗#r.txt#the haunting of hill house#ALSO i've seen commentary videos on the tv show they made of hill house but from what i remember of it it's SO different from the book???#i think they were all siblings in the show which is??????? like why would you change that part?? i love sibling relationships as much as the#next guy but i feel like the fact that none of them knew each other was such an essential part of the story like why would u change it....#also eleanor was like. an entirely different character who was also already dead in the show i believe??? and dr. montague doesn't exist??#hill house could've been really good as a show idk why they changed it up like that...like was the original story not interesting enough for#you or something?? WHO decided to make that change i just wanna talk 🤨
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I told you I never stop thinking about merpearl
#I want there to be more yuri kiss art. There isnt enough. I guess I have to be the change I want. whaagh#I think Pearl is too awkward and clueless and horrified (because DL) to actually just kiss Gem like this (at least for awhile) but#mermaid pearl is built different. Still clueless though#I am so exhausted and I have much more important things to draw but Im sorry I had yuri in my system and I needed to get it out desperately#gempearl#shiny duo#hermitshipping#tubby art
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On autonomy, and what it means to be Obliged to Help.
Bonus:
#a homestuck walks into an antechamber and asks#hey is anybody going to make this dynamic wholly deterministic and thus dubiously consensual by its very nature#ANYWAY bigger ramble below. scroll down like usual#isat spoilers#isat#isat fanart#isat siffrin#isat loop#sifloop#THATS RIGHT WE'RE STILL SHIP TAGGING IT BABYYYY#in stars and time#in stars and time fanart#lucabyteart#RAMBLE START: anyway i think loop is wrong here. they have it backwards. as-- in my opinion--#the main reason they could be called back into existence postcanon is because *their* wish for help is still not complete#they still need help. siffrin still needs help. neither of them will ever stop needing help.#they will thus uphold the wish until the end of siffrin's natural lifespan.#that said. what does it mean that loop can be so wholly forced to abide by siffrin's wants?#(assuming the dagger cutscene posession is them being forced to uphold the 'help siffrin' wish via harsh universe logic)#[as opposed to something capricious and cruel the change god did. which feels out of character for the change god to me?]#much like how the island wish and duplicate objects are neutered by simply sliding off people's brains...#is loop subtly ushered toward their wish? obviously it's not a full override (see: the bossfight). but is there any interference?#and if so. so what? does it matter? if they don't notice? is it even real if they don't notice?#and even if they do notice. the universe leads we follow. how much do either of them value their free will in a belief system like that?#the whole game is dedicated to siffrin habitually NOT excersizing his free will. doing things the same Every Time.#Loop ESPECIALLY does this. predetermined predetermined predetermined even in the FACE OF CHANGE. REFUSING. ANY CHOICE.#Maybe they'd even be comforted by having a universe-ordained purpose even if it is subservient. even if its to Him.#(though. i can't see siffrin enjoying the idea that someone is subservient TO them... then all their suffering is his fault...)#loop got into this mess via WANTING too much. no more free will. can't be trusted with it. take it away from them.#but yeah. gets my greasy detective pony hands all over this. and everyone please do remember i like to make characters Outright Wrong A Lot
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one of the things that's the most fucking frustrating for me about arguing with climate change deniers is the sheer fucking scope of how much it matters. sweating in my father's car, thinking about how it's the "hottest summer so far," every summer. and there's this deep, roiling rage that comes over me, every time.
the stakes are wrong, is the thing. that's part of what makes it not an actual debate: the other side isn't coming to the table with anything to fucking lose.
like okay. i am obviously pro gun control. but there is a basic human part of me that can understand and empathize with someone who says, "i'm worried that would lead to the law-abiding citizens being punished while criminals now essentially have a superpower." i don't agree, but i can tell the stakes for them are also very high.
but let's say the science is wrong and i'm wrong and the visible reality is wrong and every climate disaster refugee is wrong. let's say you're right, humans aren't causing it or it's not happening or whatever else. let's just say that, for fun.
so we spend hundreds of millions of dollars making the earth cleaner, and then it turns out we didn't need to do that. oops! we cleaned the earth. our children grow up with skies full of more butterflies and bees. lawns are taken over with rich local biodiversity. we don't cry over our electric bills anymore. and, if you're staunchly capitalist and i need to speak ROI with you - we've created so many jobs in developing sectors and we have exciting new investment opportunities.
i am reminded of kodak, and how they did not make "the switch" to digital photography; how within 20 years kodak was no longer a household brand. do we, as a nation, feel comfortable watching as the world makes "the switch" while we ride the laurels of oil? this boggles me. i have heard so much propaganda about how america cannot "fall behind" other countries, but in this crucial sector - the one that could actually influence our own monopolies - suddenly we turn the other cheek. but maybe you're right! maybe it will collapse like just another silicone valley dream. but isn't that the crux of capitalism? that some economies will peter out eventually?
but let's say you're right, and i'm wrong, and we stopped fracking for no good reason. that they re-seed quarries. that we tear down unused corporate-owned buildings or at least repurpose them for communities. that we make an effort, and that effort doesn't really help. what happens then? what are the stakes. what have we lost, and what have we gained?
sometimes we take our cars through a car wash and then later, it rains. "oh," we laugh to ourselves. we gripe about it over coffee with our coworkers. what a shame! but we are also aware: the car is cleaner. is that what you are worried about? that you'll make the effort but things will resolve naturally? that it will just be "a waste"?
and what i'm right. what if we're already seeing people lose their houses and their lives. what if it is happening everywhere, not just in coastal towns or equatorial countries you don't care about. what if i'm right and you're wrong but you're yelling and rich and powerful. so we ignore all of the bellwethers and all of the indicators and all of the sirens. what if we say - well, if it happens, it's fate.
nevermind. you wouldn't even wear a mask, anyway. i know what happens when you see disaster. you think the disaster will flinch if you just shout louder. that you can toss enough lives into the storm for the storm to recognize your sacrifice and balk. you argue because it feels good to stand up against "the liberals" even when the situation should not be political. you are busy crying for jesus with a bullhorn while i am trying to usher people into a shelter. you've already locked the doors, even on the church.
the stakes are skewed. you think this is some intellectual "debate" to win, some funny banter. you fuel up your huge unmuddied truck and say suck it to every citizen of that shitbird state california. serves them right for voting blue!
and the rest of us are terrified of the entire fucking environment collapsing.
#spilled ink#writeblr#i hope it is clear here that i actually very much care about equatorial countries#and that's part of what makes me so angry bc im like. climate refugees exist.#they've existed for a while!!!#and the reply is almost always ''should have thought about that before living on an island"#like fuck dude. do you need to like how people vote before ur like#your entire house shouldn't burn down each summer????#so many of these people make it their life to mock california that they think it's FUNNY#and im like. girl you should be fucking trembling. TEXAS??? ARE YOU LISTENING??#this is one of those times that like. i need to stress how fucking stupid it would be#to let trump win. bc he could have “reached across the aisle.” covid could have been#a MASSIVE commercial success. he has such a huge and bigoted and brainwashed following.#literally just a PR campaign called COWBOY UP and it's pictures of cowboys in bandanas#trump reinvisioned as the lone ranger fighting for the american people against covid. EASY SELL#and instead. companies bought him. it became political. it was not ''oh shit this is 1 enemy let's all be human''#it was ''you deserve to die.''#climate change should be GLOBAL. it should be like ''yeah i hate u but. we do all live here''#i don't have to LIKE my group members to do well on a team project bc we are ALL getting graded.#is that simple enough of an under-explaination lol
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Cooking up an older Clervie outfit design so I don't have to keep drawing her looking like her child self but Long
#genshin impact#clervie#ngl i have so many thoughts about an older clrv's design but at the same time artistically im not that creative </3#mostly tried to make her look more like a direct contrast to arlecchino's design (which was already present but we ignore that)#cause arle's design is mostly very sharp and angular while i'd imagine clervie's being much more rounded out and softer#like they are the round vs pointy cat meme in human form#the hair was really tricky cause on one hand much like everyone else we dont really keep the same hairstyle our entire lives#butttttt at the same time idk i feel like her long hair flowing down (and her headband) are very recognizable parts of her#so i decided to not change much (also cause i dont trust myself making multiple drastic changes without changing their identity too much)#also halfways through coloring I realized she's kinda giving crucabena outfit wise but we ignore that </3#anyways clervie would def be a support/healer character if actually playable (leaning more towards buffer support imo)#ITS A MASSIVE 50/50 IF SHE WOULD BE A HYDRO OR ANEMO USER but i decided hydro for the time being cause it compliments HOTH's dpses more#aka Arlecchino Lyney and partially Freminet since if i remember correctly he's more physical based but cryo nonetheless#i just really like the idea of Clervie's passive being along the lines of boosting stats/dmg if there's HOTH members present in a team#anyways sorry for the text wall I just really need to be kicked out of the kitchen#i am UNDERCOOKING the food#character design is not my passion </3
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How… Do I recover from this…?
#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#bnha#mha#dabi#touya todoroki#bnha dabi#mha dabi#bnha season 7#mha season 7#i’m just… after the episode my mind went blank completely… and then i started sobbing… because what the fuck…#i feel even more heartbroken than i already did and literally can’t stop crying…#bruh i can’t… i’m completely shattered… i couldn’t take screenshots without stopping for few moments to cry over dabi…#he has suffered so much… endured so much… i feel sick to my stomach omfg…#and some of y’all want me to change my mind about endeavor??? HELL NAH I NOW HATE HIM EVEN MORE ACTUALLY#so congrats to all of you that wanted dabi fans to be more understanding toward the walking garbage: it didn’t work#and never will. he needs and deserves to rot in fucking hell
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truth is, I used to dream about boys like you
jjk atla!au with @philosophiums
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itafushi#fushiguro megumi#itadori yuuji#fanart#jjk fanart#jjk atla!au#atla!au: art#atla!au: illust#lmhs#timelapse#2.5 hours niCE#i mean its still 2am but it could be and has been worse#realized while looking at this tht this au has Vastly increased both my use of and love for the colour green#she will never dethrone red but she definitely gets the award fr most improved#megumi especially looks . sososo good in green which is unsurprising but i am surprised anyway#speaking of megu#i love th timelapse feature so much u get to see me fighting fr my life with yuuji fr like 20 minutes then get megumi first try#there's a reason i needed a ref sheet for yuuji and not megumi. drawing megu is like riding a bike fr me#like minor adjustments r inevitable but his overall face/hair/expression come so easily and i love him all the more for it#anyway#i could have sworn i used adonis fv lyrics for a caption before??? it was so long ago#i guess i must have changed my mind on tht other post bc adonis remains free real estate >:3#PLEASE listen 2 adonis fv........pls i beg.....pls it is so itfs coded.......#hina pleading fr someone anyone to listen to former vandal goes unanswered episode 542346 :(((
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Heartfelt Reunion.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#blood#wen chao#My 'labeling things' bit started because I was worried that it might be hard to tell what things were due to my rough art skills.#And while I think I don't need to clear up the ambiguity as much these days...I think it is well earned here!#Rest in torment Wen Chao. Rest in literal pieces.#What a truly cute reunion scene this was B*)#They fall back into a comfortable pattern of banter despite the length of time apart. While also standing in front of dead bodies.#While I'm here - Let's clear something up: WWX does a *lot* of torturing and killing in this scene.#If JC is to be credited for any tortures let it be known he did that right alongside WWX. They get co-torture credits here.#Your favourite character is responsible for several horrible tortures and murders.#Was it justified? Honestly I don't think so. I think it very much needs to be over-the-top-violent to show how WWX has changed.#It was excessive force to satiate his need for revenge. WWX is consistently demonstrating how he feels justified in his actions#Up until now they have been for relatively noble causes. Protecting Mianmian - Giving away his core - Punching Jin Zuxian;#It's the same flaw in a different setting.#Tune in next time for LWJ's reaction to the blood sport vibes.
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chillin in the hot springs 🌱
+ a closeup
#ok so after drawing this i realized a major anatomical error that i compeltely overlooked and its bothering me so much that i cant unsee it#but i like how the drawing turned out so im not gonna change it#its bc if theyre both sitting down in the pool. there is no room for nemesis. but i hope you all can imagine that the pool is very deep and#they are actually standing#ok please imagine that for my sanity thank you#in my og sketch they were at the right edge of the pool and they would both have room to sit in this position but i moved them#cause i thought it would look better compositionally#and just didnt realize that the anatomy wouldnt make sense that way lmfao#anyway hope yall can still enjoy this melnem fanart#melnem#hades 2#hades ii#melinoe#nemesis#fanart#my artwork#illustration#i need these two to kiss kiss fall in love asap#oh my god also i love the little detail of their painted nails on their in game artwork#so cute#melinoe has green nails and nemesis has red nails#im love them
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there are a lot of evil people in the world and a lot of darkness in the world and so it’s very important for me to stress that now more than ever is the time to spread kindness and compassion. combat the evil by not only not partaking in it, but actively refuting it. destroy the notion that being compassionate or generous or kind to someone is uncool or embarrassing or even scary. be the change you want to see. start a chain reaction. positivity only breeds more positivity. do an act of kindness for someone so that that person who is too afraid to do it themselves can see you, realize that they’re not alone, and perhaps sheepishly follow your example. and then the next person who is too afraid but sees that person can do the same. when bad news comes out about bad people or horrible atrocities in the world it’s such an easy impulse to despair, and obviously it’s important to feel what you need to feel. grieve. be angry. be sorrowful. be empathetic. but dust off your pants and get up and be a part of a chain reaction that, no matter how small the scale, and spread compassion and love and care. all the reasons why you might not—“it’s hard! it’s scary! people will make fun of me! it’s useless because there’s too much evil!” are all grade A arguments as to why you should. you have no idea how many people you could inspire to do the same. even if it doesn’t get you anyway far, you can at least say you have the nobility of trying. please choose love and please choose life. you are worth loving and you are worth inspiring others to love
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Ze guys,
Loser boy, Teenage Girl and ... Owl
#always have so much fun drawing characters faces :3#Troy’s probably the most accurate#Runt is ever changing this doesn’t look like her but awell#and Blink… idk that’s just an owl..#I need to learn how 2 draw him properly#jrwi fanart#jrwi#my art#jrwi show#jrwi wonderlust#jrwi runt#jrwi troy#jrwi blink#one day I’ll do a lineup of all Jrwi pc’s …. one day
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I made a compilation of references for the main tmnt characters from every iteration and I thought it would be helpful, so I’m posting it here :]👍
I brightened the saturation in some so it’s more readable
Also, this is so cute, I’m keeping this
Edit: I forgot about bay Donnie, updated version
#tmnt vs Batman needs more love#It’s barely talked about#It’s great I swear#plus I love the character design#It’s a pity we could only see the turtles 😔#also#the character design changes so much in idw#so I just added some#because you could make a whole page just on that#also also#if you wonder why I didn’t add bayverse April and Casey#It’s because they don’t have April or Casey vibes#idk#I didn’t add splinter cause I forgot#tmnt#tmnt mirage#tmnt 87#tmnt 2003#tmnt 2012#tmnt idw#tmnt bayverse#rottmnt#tmnt mm
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People ask me sometimes how I'm so confident that we can beat climate change.
There are a lot of reasons, but here's a major one: it would take a really, really long time for Earth to genuinely become uninhabitable for humans.
Humans have, throughout history, carved out a living for themselves in some of the most harsh, uninhabitable corners of the world. The Arctic Circle. The Sahara. The peaks of the Himalayas. The densest, most tropical regions of the Amazon Rainforest. The Australian Outback. etc. etc.
Frankly, if there had been a land bridge to Antarctica, I'm pretty sure we would have been living there for thousands of years, too. And in fact, there are humans living in Antarctica now, albeit not permanently.
And now, we're not even facing down apocalypse, anymore. Here's a 2022 quote from the author of The Uninhabitable Earth, David Wallace-Wells, a leader on climate change and the furthest thing from a climate optimist:
"The most terrifying predictions [have been] made improbable by decarbonization and the most hopeful ones practically foreclosed by tragic delay. The window of possible climate futures is narrowing, and as a result, we are getting a clearer sense of what’s to come: a new world, full of disruption but also billions of people, well past climate normal and yet mercifully short of true climate apocalypse. Over the last several months, I’ve had dozens of conversations — with climate scientists and economists and policymakers, advocates and activists and novelists and philosophers — about that new world and the ways we might conceptualize it. Perhaps the most capacious and galvanizing account is one I heard from Kate Marvel of NASA, a lead chapter author on the fifth National Climate Assessment: “The world will be what we make it.”" -David Wallace-Wells for the New York Times, October 26, 2022
If we can adapt to some of the harshest climates on the planet - if we could adapt to them thousands of years ago, without any hint of modern technology - then I have every faith that we can adjust to the world that is coming.
What matters now is how fast we can change, because there is a wide, wide gap between "climate apocalypse" and "no harm done." We've already passed no harm done; the climate disasters are here, and they've been here. People have died from climate disasters already, especially in the Global South, and that will keep happening.
But as long as we stay alive - as long as we keep each other alive - we will have centuries to fix the effects of climate change, as much as we possibly can.
And looking at how far we've come in the past two decades alone - in the past five years alone - I genuinely think it is inevitable that we will overcome climate change.
So, we're going to survive climate change, as a species.
What matters now is making sure that every possible individual human survives climate change as well.
What matters now is cutting emissions and reinventing the world as quickly as we possibly can.
What matters now is saving every life and livelihood and way of life that we possibly can.
#hope my reasoning here makes sense#idk I'm just a person who does a lot of research and posting talking about my take on things#I'm not any kind of Real Authority#but still#and for what it's worth the climate and climate transition data I've been following DOES make me confident in this conclusion#I struggled with the line between recognizing the very real damages of climate change#especially on the global south and especially in the last few years#and focusing on the positive instead of regaling you all with depressing situations#especially when there is so much amazing work being done throughout marginalized countries and marginalized groups#literally if rich countries just paid climate reparations and did actual decolonization/landback#a lot of communities could sort out the shit they need to sort out themselves#and/or in alliance and solidarity with each other#or at least most of the things they need to sort out!!#cough anyway#climate change#climate action#climate emergency#climate crisis#global warming#climate solutions#hope#hope posting#not news#me
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there is just something about the difference between edwin's love interests and having the cat king's reaction to edwin in hell being "i'll be waiting when he gets back" vs charles "no version of this where i don't come get you" rowland convincing a powerful trans-dimensional being to open a door to hell just so he could get him back
i am insane
#like YES i know there is obviously so much more history between the boys than edwin and the cat king#and for everyone who's like “well how would the cat king have gotten to hell”#yall charles got LUCKY that the night nurse was there to open a door for him#you can bet your ass that if she hadn't been there he still would've figured out how to get there no matter what it took#but the cat king calling himself a romantic because he'll wait vs charles GOING TO HELL TO GET HIM BACK????#absolutely insane#i cannot handle these two#like i can vibe with the cat king#but charles x edwin for the WIN#obviously the circumstances between the characters are a lot different#but to me that changes absolutely nothing about the fact that charles who only thinks of edwin as a friend would do literally anything#vs the cat king who claims to have fallen for edwin doing literally nothing and just sulking about it#i don't even care if you dont ship charles and edwin#the love they have for each other will forever outweigh anything else#(ps if you ship catwin you simply do not need to interact with this post. you will not change my mind)#(you do not have to interact with posts you don't agree with)#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#charles rowland#edwin payne#the cat king#painland#payneland#dbd netflix
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