#i mean it sucks. theres a lot wrong here. but

[ispyspookymansion]

if tumblr shuts down ill kill myself probably or i guess i’ll be on twitter for a while or maybe just lay down on the floor and stay there

[usercelestial]

✨ venting ✨

[dontbesoweirdkira]

Platonic Yan! Batboys x Batsis darling

A/N: I want to talk about the concept of batsis having a s/o or a crush and how the family would react to that. I'm sure this concept might've been done but if i may speak-

Warnings: Obsession, relationship sabotage, overbearing family dynamics

Requests: always open.

Masterlist

Dick Grayson

I think he's kind of complex about this issue. I don't think !yan Dick would have a problem with you dating in itself. Like there is so many siblings and no way to keep all of these hormonal teen and young adults at bay. He's been there, he gets it.

But there's some conditions. You have to have a good relationship with dick, first. It you are close, that means you tell him...everything. He can easily monitor you and the progression of things. You'll be trusted to tell him is something goes wrong and he can step in. You won't mind Dick tagging along or being generally invasive. You won't forget about him or the family, he knows that you'll drop everything and come running. His grip is already secured firmly around you and your mind so theres no reason to worry. Have fun, be safe.

If you're anything like my previous posts where batsis is not close with dick in the slightest, he'd sabotage that relationship. He's not having it at all. Your dating is a threat to the family. You already have an apprehension of him, so anyone can swoop in and take his sis away. He doesn't want that. He doesn't trust your judgement or decision making skills enough. Dick knows that if someone hurt you or was dangerous, you'd hid it from him. You refuse to give Dick any sort of access to your life so therefore dating is a no. Sorry baby bat, it's for your own good!

But maybe i'm wrong. Maybe Dick doesn't want any of his siblings dating..especially his batsis. I've said before that Dick has given up his previous relationships among other things for the family. His siblings are his most important priority and he's willing to do whatever it takes to make sure they're properly provided for. What if he expects the same. He's jealous over the fact you all get to go out and date and he cannot because he's stuck playing dad? What if he's jealous that you're spending all your time with someone else? You don't have time for your older brother anymore

He's hurt when you embarrassingly hide your partner from him. You're critiquing everything he does and tells him not to call you by the nicknames he gave you. Yan! Dick hates being discarded. And maybe, none of this happened? Maybe you gladly show off your brother to your partner? Maybe just the thought of you one day getting married and leaving him fills his mind. He overthinks about being left here alone like Bruce was...he doesn't want that. He cannot have that. You cannot date for your own good...for his own good

Jason Todd

I don't think he'll ever vocalize his true feelings. and reluctantly allows it. Jason is rather against you dating, but because he doesn't trust anyone outside of the family. Plus he doesn't like that he gets to see you way less now.

Jason would be the brother that'd be cleaning his guns while you're introducing you partner to him. His tone is sharp and he doesn't embrace them once. He wants them to know there is someone in your life that'll kill for you if they hurt you.

I think if Jason sensed the person you were dating wasn't any good, he'd handle it privately. Your partner ghosts you for three days then sends a "i don't want to see you ever again." text. Weird. Everything was going great. Luckily your brother Jason just got back from his three day trip to comfort you.

If the partner is good but he doesn't really get any time with you, i think he's get a little out of character. Suddenly he's a lot more clingy to you when you're there. He's just following you around the entire house and wanting to spend every second with you. If it gets bad enough he will have to intervene with his other siblings. He misses you. This whole dating things sucks, who needs them when you have a perfect family. They're all you need.

Damien Wayne

He doesn't like change. At. All. This family is perfect as it is.

So don't mess it up by changing the natural order of things. This partner of yours is a nuisance. An incompetent, brain dead loser who is dragging you down with them. You don't need them. Damien is rather offended that you felt like you even needed something more outside of the family. What does this prick have that they don't?

He's weary of the fact that this person wanted to date you. Not that you're not enough but you're a Wayne now. People always wants something, if not money, its something else. You're foolish for this.

On a deeper level, Damien feels like he's loosing a parent. It's clear that your partner doesn't like your younger brother or even want him around. He misses you driving him around, reading together and sneaking out. You've never taken his often impolite banter to heart, you loved him as he was. He felt drawn to you. You were like a mother figure to him..don't do this. He;s sad and thinks you don't love him anymore.

Tim Drake

Maybe the least closest to you. You probably think he doesn't even like you but it's not true. He's just an observer more than a hands on type of person. He's just as yandere as the others, he cares. The second he got the name of your partner, he spends all day searching up dirt on them. He has a file of blackmail sitting pretty on his hard drive in case that person hurts you.

He's not confrontational like the rest. He's a bit too socially awkward for that but if he seriously felt you were in danger, he'd stop you. I think he'd mainly plot with the others to sabotage the relationship.

Like Damien, he doesn't understand why you need someone so badly. The family is more that fulfilling to him so why not for you? Time misses the little things like when you'd bring him food to his desk, or usher him to take a break from his computer. He misses your laughter and interactions with the rest of the family. He doesn't feel safe with you being out so much. The world is a dangerous place, it's safer here, where everyone can protect you. They all love you, and their love combined is far stronger than your partners.

[ancientgoddessofegypt]

Astro Observations Pt.. ????

No, I cant keep up with the number. Lol. Lets go!

7th house placements def need to pick a side. They also need to put their foot down. Never let people who disrespect you back in. And if you're going to cut off one person for doing it, you gotta do it with everyone else. Just cause they relationship is long term doesn't mean much.

10th house placements need to focus on the things they truly love vs always digging into what they need to do for their career. Worry less about your ambitions from time to time and enjoy the flow. I know ti sucks but, you gotta relax a little.

Sun/Pluto placements can have a lot of rebirth experiences, but one thing that is important is their for growth. Which always seems to come through transformation, but not all the time. It comes through people, and the expression of being around people who love you. Thats what transform them the most. They need the world to truly see them for who they are, other wise they will only show one side of them, and that will ultimately be the version they transform into but it will only kill them from the inside and not benefit them.

Venus/Neptune placements have an inkling for romanticism, fantasy and philosophy in their relationships. They need something that makes them breathe words of enlightenment, purity and emotion. They have the tendency to make things seem more than what they are, rose colored glasses are no match for them at times. A little insight on them is that their emotions can go a little array when they aren't surrounded by the right people. They tend to suck in energy like a sponge, this is neptune energy. But with them you can notice a small difference between them and their lovers, like is it making them glow or is it draining? Thats what they need to ask themselves at times.

Jupiter in the 11th house can proudly be the most optimistic friend in the group. They could become the leader of an organization. They could be the one people come to for advice on certain matters or they could easily be someone people go to when they want to learn more about something. Very charismatic and sharp. Stern but sweet. A little rough around the edges but they get things done!

5th house Suns have a universe of emotions that express themselves in all types of ways. They'll have kids that are just as sweet & charismatic as them. They are a NATURAL at making people laugh! They normally have gorgeous spirits and people do enjoy their company.

Gemini placements have an alluring nature to them due to their minds. Their mysticism is through the art of words and are very tricky individuals. They have come here to master the mind and find ways to fully express their intellect in hopes to connect with as many as possible. They are a one of one when it comes to this area of life.

Moon in the 1st are seen as thoughtful, loving sweet creatures who everyone seems to be super fond of. They hide a lot of their emotions but sometimes we can tell when they're not okay.

Theres just something about them that brightens a persons day. They try to make a good example to others by the why they embrace their feelings and this usually inspires others to do the same.

Sun square neptune - Might be in the wrong crowd from time to time. Has to stay sober most of the time, getting into drugs and alcohol can be addictive and might not be worth it at times. Genuinely misunderstood. Might need a doctor to figure out why they act the way that they do (all jokes).

Very spiritual, this is contained tho. They dont really open up to people about religion or anything connected to spirituality/God. Its their own thing, and its very special/private to them.

Moon/Uranus placements - Needs a doctor. Okay im joking lol. Anyways their lucky to have this one because their minds are very capable of entering into mass amounts of information that is truly locked away from the rest of the world. Like their neptune friends, they have a connection to divine sources that strikes down to them from time to time almost like a brain blast. Could be a oracle, psychic, someone who just knows whats going to happen in the next years to come etc. Could be really creative too.

4th house placements can be friends you can depend on all of the time. They have a warm, soothing personality and their the type of friends you grow up into adulthood with.

[reidispunk]

adjacent

★⇢ Bruce Wayne x reader

★⇢ angst, fluff

★⇢ violence! slightly described torture

★⇢ wordcount; almost 3k <3

★⇢ yay first batman fic!! I missed writing and i’m maybe hoping to get back to it :)

★⇢ cross posted on ao3

You were always careful when walking around in the city. Living in the biggest crime city in the country has taught you a lot of things about survival. Being a woman and associated with Bruce Wayne brought a lot of unwanted attention, but only sometimes and besides, you could handle yourself.

Until you couldn’t.

—

You were almost at your car when you heard multiple footsteps behind you, when usually you wouldn’t think something was wrong an uncomfortable feeling washed over you.

Now you were on high alert. You heard snickering behind you when speeding up, too panicked to look behind you. Flashes of your talks with bruce come up, shakily you pried the bag with you open.

Speed-dialing his number “please please please answer.” you begged silently while listening the phone ring.

Cursing when the call went in to voicemail.

“Something’s wrong. I- fuck I think I might be in trouble— please Bruce for once answer the phone.”

Inhaling, exhaling you pressed the call button again. “It’s Bruce, I’ll call back later.” The voicemail rung again, you think you might sob. You had talked about what if’s and you’re supposed to know what to do but it feels like you’re frozen. You can’t think, you can’t run. You know they’re on your heels, but you just can’t move your muscles any faster.

“You know if ever, I mean ever sweet girl you’re in trouble and can’t reach me. Call Alfred. He’ll help you.” Bruce says while brushing your hair behind your ear, smiling at the loving gesture you ask “what kind of trouble?”

“Any kind.”

Walk walk walk, trying to find Alfred Pennyworths name from your contacts while panicking is not an easy task. But you do, and press call. For your relief he answers immediately, “Miss, how can I help you?” He asks.

“Alfred— I can’t reach Bruce and I think I might be in trouble. Fuck— I’m sorry, theres this group that’s following me, I’m so-“ your sentence cuts suddenly, you’re feeling woozy and you notice that the group has you surrounded.

“Well well, what do we have here?” One of the men snickers, “little miss Wayne, huh? Or should I say little miss Batman?” He laughs. “Which ones dick are you sucking huh? Or are you a slut? Stringing two men, hmm?” The group around you laughs.

“I guess we’ll see which one comes after you first, then.” He says before you feel yourself blacking out.

Bruce thinks he’s going to lose his mind, first you were calling him and now Alfred. Don’t both of you know that he’s in this meeting? He’s literally here only because of you, sighing and excusing himself he decides to take Alfreds call first.

“Alfred you know I’m in a meeting please—“ he doesn’t even get to finish his sentence before he feels like his heart leaped from his chest.

“She’s been taken.” Alfred says hurriedly “I’m not sure by who but she called me clearly in distress and I heard how she was—“

Bruce thinks he might pass out. “From what i was able to hear from the phone call, it’s a taunt to you and Batman.”

Immediately hanging up he listens to your distressed voicemail. “Mr. Wayne, is everything okay?” He hears a chair member ask behind him. But he doesn’t answer, he needs to get to you.

You gasp awake when water drenches you. “Welcome back. Now, you are going to listen to me and speak only when prompted to, alright?” The man before you says, you can’t make out his face in the darkness but you know better. “Understood.” You say in a timid voice, to make yourself seem small so he feels in control.

But you know you just need to prolong this until Vengeance can find you. The man smiles at your response, he probably is getting off on this, you think.

“Good girl. Now first question, who is the Batman?” He questions, you had assumed it was coming.

You shake your head “I couldn’t tell you mister, because he never showed me his face nor told me his identity.” You answer softly. “Wrong answer.” He says and— you probably should’ve seen it coming electrocutes you.

You gasp in pain, the shocks never seem to stop until it does. “You see now girl, this is not a game to me. You will tell me who the Batman is, hopefully sooner than later.” He says menacingly before stalking off.

——

You don’t know how long it’s been, how long you really have been in this dungeon the men brought you. But it’s been long enough for you to start accepting your fate, maybe he is not coming, he may not find you at all.

Your belief in the Batman is strong, belief in Bruce Wayne even stronger but you know he is just a man, you wouldn’t fault him if he didn’t find you in time.

Maybe you are really dying here, the man comes every few hours you think. Asks the same question, and he always gets the same answer. All you can feel is pain, it dulls down but never for long enough because he always comes back. You’re tired, close to giving up.

But then, you hear it. The sweet sound of hope. Distant screams, maybe it’s in your head. But you let yourself hope.

The man should’ve come for a 9th round already, but he hasn’t. And you can hear those heavy footsteps, you could recognize them anywhere. You hear men yell in agony and in fear, you might have even chuckled at it.

He’s here.

The last time the man came to question you, you broke down laughing. Slightly manic from the pain, he had been clearly startled. He had asked you why you were laughing, your facade had been broken down.

“He will come for you, he will find you.’ It’s just, when. And if I am dead, well.” You had said while cackling at his face. The man had straightened, maybe in fear who knows but you know you had been right.. Of course he hadn’t liked your answer and punched you but you knew the bat would come.

Vengeance had come. Suddenly the man who has been visiting you, runs in to the room. Shouting profanities, maybe at you maybe at the Batman. “What did you do?!” He yells at you, “how did he find us!” He says while grabbing your collar.

You just smile. The door slams open. There he is. You’ve always known Bruce Wayne as a kind passionate man, but his alter ego is far from that man. Batman is menacing and terrifying if he wants to be. Appearing from the shadows he slowly approaches you, the man holding you is shaking.

“S-stay back! Or I’ll hurt her!” He stutters out. You exhale, looking at the Batman you see his frigid stance, probably out of rage you think. But you see his hand twitch just slightly, which wouldn’t mean anything to anyone else but to you it speaks volumes.

He’s scared— anxious? You know you probably don’t look too hot on the metal chair, soaked and bruised.

He steps toward you and the man behind you breaks “okay, okay man! Just please let me go!” He back away from you. You chuckle dryly.

The Batman is on a war path, probably every other man in this building you’re in is gone. He flashes toward the man and you know it’s finished. You’re safe.

After 5minutes of beating the man to a pulp you speak up. “Hey Vengeance, little help?” You say exhaling from the pain. He stops, startled like he forgot you were even in the same room as him. Suddenly he’s on you, scanning every place you’re hurt in. He cuts the rope’s that are binding you in the chair.

His gloved hands are on your face holding it up. You can see the wild panic that’s still roaring in his eyes. “You’re okay, you’re okay, you’re okay.” He repeats like a mantra. “I will be fine, just please— help me out of here.” You sigh, all your strength is gone. You are putty in his arms when he lifts you from the chair.

“I’m sorry.” He quietly whispers. You shake your head in protest, always blaming himself. “Stop.” You only manage to get out before you’re blacking out.

You wake up to beeping, the smell of sterile hospital room fills your nostrils. The bright lights are going to blind you, you think. Suddenly realizing you’re completely alone. Eyebrows scrunching you look around the empty room, some of your things have been placed on a chair but nothing else in the room even indicates that anyone else has been there.

The door opens and Alfred walks in. You notice him relieved to see you up, “miss, I’m so glad to see you here in one piece.” He says softly while walking towards your bed.

You smile at him “I’m glad to see you too but—“ your sentence gets cuts short when you see Alfred grimace. That can’t be good.

“What is it?” You ask sighing. He reached into his coat pocket and pulls out an envelope, while he’s handing it to you- you realize what this is.

Tears slowly pooling to your eyes you chuckle. Of course— you can’t say you are surprised but well. Curse you for expecting anything else. You take it shakily from Alfred. “I’m going to find us something better to eat than hospital food while you—“ he sighs “I really am sorry about all of this, miss.” And he turns to leave.

A sob escapes you when the door closes behind Alfred. You open the envelope and find a letter and a check.

Sweet girl.

I’m sorry, I’m sorry for causing all of this to happen, this has been completely my responsibility and I’ve let you down. I have never been more scared when i got the call from Alfred.

Please use the money to move out of Gotham, I need you to be safe. We should not be seen together any longer, to avoid further damage to you, or to me. This shouldn’t never happened in the first place.

Your things are all in order, I have made sure of it.

I keep listening to the voicemail you left me before, I’m so sorry for not answering. It is all my fault.

— Bruce Wayne

He didn’t outright write it but you know this is Bruces way of saying goodbye. And now you’re hyperventilating. Great.

You didn’t deserve this, you didn’t deserve any of this. And he’s the one who’s pulling away? Tears are falling down on the letter, smudging the ink and his handwriting. A sob breaks through and you can’t stop. You’re trying to dry the letter with shaky hands, this stupid letter is all you have left of him now.

Alfred walks back in, food bag in hand he looks startled to see you in this state. “Miss, calm down please” he drops the food back next to your bed and grabs you by your forearms. “It will be alright, I promise.” He says but you shake your head. “I’m completely alone, I have no one.” Your voice cracks and another sob bubbles up. Alfred’s shaking his head furiously “no you are not, you have me. Just give him time, he’ll come around.” He tries to reassure you.

“No he won’t, he wants me to move out of the city.” You drop the letter on your lap and bury your face in your hands. What were you going to do?

“We will figure this out miss, I promise.”

You did figure it out.

It’s been a few months since the— event and since you saw Bruce. A person you had been seeing regularly since you were a child, just disappeared from your life completely. You swear you have seen flashes of him when you’re walking around the city but you might be reaching.

You have a relatively nice place in the outskirts of Gotham, much safer and comfortable than your last apartment. You did consider leaving the city all together but it has been your home for your entire life.

Alfred was a huge help in everything after you were discharged from the hospital. But you are alone now. You’d thought that it would have been something you had gotten used to but life has been a cruel joke to you for a while now.

It’s late, but you can’t sleep these days. So you resort to sitting on your porch with a teamug and a cigarette, a bad habit you picked up after everything. It wasn’t something you were proud of but it was comforting enough. You had adopted a cat, hoping to ease the loneliness a bit. While it did help a little you still felt desperately alone. Inhaling the smoke you listened the city and all of its noises. Police sirens, cars, that city hum had given you some peace at some point but now it just brought you dread.

Suddenly, goosebumps rose on your skin. Looking around you couldn’t see anything but you couldn’t help but feel like someone was watching you. Shivering you put out the cigarette to get up and go back inside.

“That’ll kill you.” You heard from the shadows, freezing completely. How dare he come to your house after everything?

“Fucking hypocrite.” You spit back and pull yourself up. Opening the front door and swiftly pulling it closed behind you, hoping it was enough of a message that you weren’t interested.

He knocks. He fucking knocks on your door. You laugh, ignoring the fucking knock you walk to your kitchen to set the tea mug down. He’s knocking again and you know he has persistence, so he could be knocking on your door all night. Inhale— exhale.

You walk back to the door and yank it open. He’s standing there with his hand up ready to knock again. “Get the fuck off my property Bruce.” You angrily pointed at him.

He takes his mask off— he looks like shit. “Please, let’s talk.” He pleads

——

Having Bruce in your new home wasn’t something you let yourself imagine. But here he is, standing uncomfortably in your living room while you try to gather yourself in the kitchen.

“I know I fucked up but—“ he starts and you march to the other room. “No! You didn’t ‘fuck up’, I got kidnapped and you LEFT me right when I fucking needed you the most, Bruce!” You exclaim. He lowers his head maybe in shame but you’re too tired to analyze his tells.

“You can’t just— disappear from my life and the expect to be welcomed back with open arms! I have been so alone and—“ you let out an involuntary sob. “You left me Bruce.” Your voice cracks, of course you missed him but you can’t do this. Let yourself hope and get hurt all over again.

“I know. I’m sorry, fuck— I can’t stop listening the voicemail you left me that day and I remember how I couldn’t protect you all over again! If you weren’t associated with me, they wouldn’t have paid you any mind, and I can’t live with myself knowing that I’m the reason you got hurt.” He exclaims back, you shake your head in displeasure.

“I never blamed this on you Bruce. It was never on you! I just needed you to be here with me.” You sob, turning back around to face your hallway that leads to the kitchen. You hear Bruce move towards you and you still. “I have been deathly scared for you every night since you started being Batman. But I’ve stayed next to you through all of it because I know this city is important to you! I know what all of this means to you and even though, it breaks my heart to see you hurting I have always been in your corner.” You finally let out things that have been brewing inside you for months.

It’s so silent now that you think maybe he disappeared again, and you quickly turn back around but what you really see shocks you. Bruce Wayne has always been not stoic but strong, rarely have you seen him desperate or sad. His emotions always ranging between rage and apathy. But now he looks just, broken. You almost flinch towards him because of the sudden show of vulnerability. “I’m— apology isn’t even enough anymore is it.” He says voice hoarse.

“You know, that I’ve always been here for you. So why can’t you be here for me?” You sigh while taking a step toward the utterly broken looking man.

“I want to be. I just— I can’t lose you like I lost my parents.” He whispers as you approach him slowly. You sigh “I know, and I want to promise you won’t, but that’s life you know. But I can promise you that I will by your side as long as I can, if you let me.” Softly saying while you raise your arm to hold his forearm. “If you are on mine.”

His eye bags are showing underneath the black eyeshadow he has on, you bite your lip in concern— has he been sleeping at all? Bruce nods then and pulls you in to his arms. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. For everything, sweet girl.” He says quietly. “I promise I will be here, for you.”

You think then, that maybe everything will be okay, after all.

[genderqueerdykes]

I stumbled across someone who calls themself 'gender critical', a 'hater of all things male', AND a 'transguy butchdyke'.

we've finally done it, everyone. a gender crit who is the very thing their peers despise: someone who's transmasc. I'm starting to think people are this stupid on purpose

this happens soooooooooooo often it's really painful. i'll try to explain, i do agree with you that it's just willful stupidity in the sense that they're riding the high of being a jackass. like inside of troll communities like this all they really do is ride the high of pissing people off. also, unfortunately, a lot of these people are extremely vulnerable and deal with very low self esteem and use these kinds of violent, angry, exclusive communities as a way to self soothe and it never works out. its an echo chamber and they stay miserable and all that's left to do is ride the adrenaline rush you get from pissing someone off

generally what happens in this case can be one of a few things. the first is that they tend to be trans mascs or men who watch fucked up trans creators on YouTube like Kalvin Garrah or Buck Angel who tell them that non binary people aren't trans and that trans men can never be feminine ever. but then they also interact with rad fems and get suckered in because the rad fem community tolerates butch transmasc people to an extent in order to increase their numbers. they don't really care all that much if you're transmasc as long as you're suckering other people into their cult, they're happy as can be.

unfortunately this also stems from people who detransitioned and felt completely disenfranchised from their trans identity and time spent as being trans so they take it out on other trans people. they didn't end up being trans and they're pissed off because trans people "tricked" them into doing it too. usually what it is is that person is either genuinely curious or has low self esteem and does something because someone they look up to does, only to find out its not for them, so they take it out on the group they didn't fit into instead of moving along. it just realy sucks because there's nothing wrong with detransitioning at all whatsoever, but its the people who become bitter and jaded from their experiences and take it out on other trans people that really need to sort their shit out.

anyone who's proud to be a man hater is a rad fem there's no other reason to be like that. and it's just weird as hell when i see rad fems trying to "reclaim" certain genderqueer lesbian terms when they don't even fit into those categories to begin with. if you hate and reject manhood how are you a man? suffering is not righteous, you will not gain anything by allowing yourself to suffer for someone else. if you hate manhood and are a man: that means you hate yourself. that is your cross to bear. you need to sort that out with yourself, not take it out on other people.

it's just dumb. i agree with you it's some sort of willful stupidity in order to troll and fuck with people. they get a kick out of it because it pisses people off. that's really all it is. they think they're counterculture, but they're edgelords. they're not making any bold statements by using terms that are heavily used by trans people (including detrans btw) and then somehow saying its now a rad fem or gender crit thing. you're doing that for shock value.

i stopped seeing that kind of behavior lately fortunately but it's all over this website. there are so many people on here who have just completely willingly walked right into rad feminism and brag about it. like they're somehow these cool punks who don't follow the rules. like they're somehow making a statement, like they're somehow breaking societal norms in a productive way. theres literally 0 critical thinking involved in rad feminism. all they do is actively oppress women and trans people, how is that "counter culture"? that's fascism. you're just a jackass fucking around with words on the internet to piss people off. that's just troll behavior. nobody cares, we have shit to do off of our phones and computers

[jaemified]

last - xu minghao

"i dont want our first time to be our last."

pairing ; xu minghao x fem!reader

genre ; suggestive (haaahahhahaa), est relationship, hao and reader are graduates (kinda)

warnings ; implied mature themes, first time together but not first time overall

wordcount ; 0.7k

synopsis ; youre going to the states for college, minghaos pursuing his dream in korea. and hes gonna miss you, badly.

note - hao is so bf in this pic help

read below the cut !

"i got accepted into pledis, and ive decided, that i want to take the chance ive been given." minghao told y/n, letting her down easy.

'huh', she thought. it finally made sense to her now, why hed been slightly more distant then normal, and why now, with 2 months left of summer before her freshmen year of college, that he decided so abruptly that they needed to meet up.

"so thats it? youre going to korea, and im going to california? im glad youre doing what makes you happy but, why couldnt you have told me sooner? theres not much time left and we both know long distance relationships never work, i mean most movies end with the main characters being across the state, but across the world? 9066km is way to far-"

minghao cuts her off with a soft kiss, his hand moving up to her shoulder, grip growing tighter with every passing second.

the loving kiss which was meant to shut his talkative girlfriend up began to rise into something a little more.

"you worry a lot, you know?" he playfully scoffed while he leaned back, resting his forehead against hers as he moves the same hand which once rested on her shoulder, up to the back of her head.

"im just, really, really gonna miss you.." y/n whispers, before pulling him again once more by the collar of his dress shirt.

minghao lowly whimpers as y/n slightly nips at his lower lip with her teeth, then goes in for another kiss with minghao licking her own bottom lip, asking for her to let him in during the process.

pulling away, he pushes y/n down onto the bed, adding pressure onto her lower stomach with his own body weight before he goes to hover over her.

she reaches up to run her fingers through his hair, tilting her head to give minghao more access to her neck as he leans down, licking and sucking to find that one spot where she knows splotches of red would be left for her to remember him by for days.

y/n sighed as she listened to the wet sounds of minghao kissing on her neck, biting back a whimper as he reached the one spot on her neck he loved marking the most.

moving one arm down, he leaned onto his right arm while pressing his lower body into the girl below him, slightly grinding his bulge into her clothed heat through it all.

"youre so good to me, hao." she mutters into his ear, leaving a small peck on the side of his head.

he just mumbled something incoherent in response.

with his free hand, he swiftly unbuttoned the top portion of y/ns blouse, slipping his hand under her little black bralette he would always praise her in as he would watch her get dressed.

before he could do anything else, y/n quickly held minghaos wrist. as soon as he felt her hold around him, he pulled his hand back and sat up. "whats wrong? did i hurt you? he questioned with a genuine but concerned tone, using a soft voice that always managed to have y/ns head spinning.

"not at all, its just, youre leaving, and im scared."

"dont be scared, my love. im here for you, you can tell me anything. do you not want to? its fine if you dont, we can stop-" "hao, im okay. its just.." she interrupts him, then pauses.

"just?"

"i dont want our first time to be our last."

"i understand. just know i still love you."

"i love you too. but, i want to. it just feels like we are already saying goodbye even though we havent left yet."

"we arent saying goodbye. just see you later. even so, its not for another 2 months."

"but what if you meet someone better then me? what if she treats you better then i ever can? what if-" minghao stops her mid sentence with yet another kiss on the lips, but shorter then the first.

"theres no one better then you. ill visit you when i can. and when i do, we can do anything you want. fast, or slow." "ew." "you cant say ew just as im about to fuck you."

"youre right."

"you dont have to, y/n. you can back out now, its not to late."

"no, im ready." she gives him a reassuring smile.

"then, let me take care of you tonight. ill go soft on you."

[delphientropy]

Hi friend here. Did you manage to get a wheelchair? I'm in Canada and they usually have a share cupboard of them at the hospital that you can borrow until you can apply for ministry assistance in getting one. Idk if it's more complicated where you are but I'm hear for you

no, i didn't. ive been just hanging out at my moms house the past day or two and im too scared to try and convince my dad to get me checked out physically because he doesn't believe theres "anything wrong with me" (his words not mine) (my dad takes care of the medical stuff, my mom doesn't). we havent been able to visit a doctor or anything. i honestly dont know anything about how getting a wheelchair would look like, ive never broken a bone or anything so ive never even had crutches. i mean i hope getting a wheelchair is that easy? but my dad doesn't believe me and i dont know if he ever will which makes me really upset to think about. like im not completely bedridden or paralyzed or something so i guess its nothing!! wow thanks dad in cured. this is an invisible disability isnt it? that fucking sucks

thank you though. it means a lot to me that im not actually being dramatic and its not just me

[l3viat8an]

Make that four asks (please tell me to shut up if I'm sending too many things I won't b mad, I tend to say. A lot :,> )

Imagine if MC is bad with names & either doesn't remember anyone's names for the first few weeks or just gives up and calls them not-their-name

Like if they're in the same room MC just blankly stares and points at them / snaps at them to get their attention bc they forgot the name of the demon

Or just like

"wait where's Sarah" (meant Satan)

"Yo cilantro?" (Again Satan)

"sunglasses where are you" (mammon)

"indigooo :D" (Levi)

"belll" (beel)

"are you suuure spooky scary skeletons isnt here" (Barbatos because of his wing-horn-things)

Etc

And mc somehow never mixes the brother's names up / calls them eachother's names but will call them LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE

Hair colors could technically work but then theres

"I mean uhm- uh- wh-white hair-"

'do you mean Mammon or Solomon?'

"..why are their names so similar 😰😰"

'???'

Related but also not, I also instinctively call everyone 'sir' because of my cat ("SIR- Sir. Sir. sir. You aren't allowed in my room") so that wouldn't even differentiate the brothers either but it would be funny to just accidentally whip around and be like "SIR! Stop that!" to Satan or Belphegor trying to pull a prank on Lucifer, or Mammon trying to steal something

Everyone is relieved when MC finally starts getting names right

You’re fine!! I don’t mind lolol

At some point the boys just start catching on to which random nickname means who kshsjshsj

Lucifer makes the bros wear name tags jkjk he does try to correct MC whenever he can tho. After all names are important and calling the wrong brother the wrong name could lead to a stupid argument like accidentally calling Satan / Lucifer or Levi / Mammon 

Mammon is absolutely going to correct MC about his name at first I mean he is; The Great Mammon!!! After all!! Tho he does kinda like being called sir-

Levi just kinda figures MC doesn’t think his name is worth remembering and fair enough, he’s a shut in loser- blah blah blah- MC would have to explain to him they just suck with names and it’s not personal 💀

Satan and Asmo wouldn’t mind weird ish nicknames but they would get moody if Mc calls them by another brothers name- that’s just plan rude and we look nothing alike!!!

I feel like Beel and Belphie wouldn’t care in general- like they’re the youngest and mixing up names between 7 siblings is bound to happen- besides they’ve been called worse 💀

[nicegaai]

im attempting my fic reread today. im announcing this bc i will be liveblogging to keep my morale up, NOT THAT anyone cares but i personally need this, like ill only commit to do the thing if theres an imaginary audience holding me accountable. & i like to have fun :3

anyway. captains log, its a beautiful sunny july weekend. i just finished my morning coffee, and, i am dreading this so much. i dont like rereading my own writing but i shall get over it. ok here we go.

Þetta Reddast vagueblogged directors commentary edition

Ch 1:

*opens fic and starts convulsing immediately* god i wish i smoked weed rn. i cannot chill out ever for the life of me

My Mission For Today Is: to remember what plot threads I’ve left hanging so I can resolve this story properly. And also try n remember where the flow is going. I have the end plotted out, I just am a little lost … it’s been a while :-(

------------

Abrupt beginning!!!! I’m not mad because I have . I HAD. Almost no writing experience when I started this. it isn’t ideal but I refuse to be one of those fanfic writers that starts rewriting early chapters without finishing the last ones. Ive never seen one of those types actually finish a longfic. …I’d already rather yap than actually read LMAO AHH

Oh this is worse than I remember. thats cool that s great ok alright *coughs up blood*

"20 somethings" WOW I really did not know where I was going with this when I started huh

LKJSDLKSJDLGKGDJSLDGJK ??? Who authorized this. Who let me cook. What the hell

I could write this better now. I could edit this into something beautiful. <- devil on my shoulder

FORGOT I WAS MAKING RICE BRB

"generously offered nothing to the exchange." wait STOPPPP. I’m so funny

GRAMMAR ERROR DETECTED why is there two periods. I’ll be coming back to fix that …………………. :-(((

Fuck. This is a lot. Marge Simpson Hiding Her Face dot Png

Oh this is stupid this is gayyy this is fukcinnn . Who fucking did t his. What was wrong with me,. This is so good actually. what was i ONNNN. 

Im gonna throw up and I don’t know if thats like/. A complimentary thing or if im just cringing that hard . Im feeling emotions. I love my OTPs..OT3~5? I love them so so much

Ok as much as im like “eww bad writing” this is .. dare I say, rly good in places. Not to suck my own dick but maybe all hope isnt lost and imposter syndrome is an illusion

Grammar mistake #2. Goddddddd. they should ban me from the archive for this

EMILLLLL EMIL EMIL EMIL HIIIIII BABYYYY EMILLL I LOVE UUUU AWWHUUGHH everyone clap for my bewoved baby bruvver right FUCKING now

Urghhh gritting my teeth… Im fully expecting the flow of events to start not making any gd sense. There’s no way this came together the way I hoped in my head and .... For real I was never able to read this all the way thru. this is my first time, lol. and it was all disjointed on the authorial end to say the least. Im scared T-T

Jlxjvklsdkjfsjlkdkjlsjklkljzsdkjlgaskljdgjklasljkgdljkasljkdgjklasjlkdgljkaskljdgjakl?????????? 

Im not liking the ratio of dialogue to whatever the other stuff is. scene-setting I guess. prose maybe. i could have dragged this out way longer... By which I mean made it a more satisfying read. But WHATEVER !!!! 

TIMO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TIMOOOOOOOOOO NUMERO UNOOOO DO MUNDOOOOOO I really need to utilize him more. As soon as I finish this fic I need to write a Timo POV spinoff where he gets cancelled on furry twitter for proshipping in real life

Hmmmm chapter ending didn’t hit as hard in practice as it did in drafts. Oh well. God damn that was a lot to happen in one chapter LMAOO???

OH SHIT MY RICE IS STILL COOKING —— 

[suffarustuffaru]

otto, doing something with good intentions: are you sure you want me in your life. i bring a lot of trouble you know. and i helped you just for my own benefit. this money isnt mine by the way. so like im gonna give it to you. just out of pity or whatever. no its not my money haha why would it be my money. also we didnt like Murder those people haha why would we do that? they fell off on accident <3 dont worry i lied to the authorities for your sake - i mean. they. um. i told them the truth about what happened hahah. also did i mention already that youre better off without me in your life. and im gonna leave the moment theres danger. just so you know. so like dont be surprised if i leave you. also im not gonna tell you why im doing any of this for you. the reason why is so boring anyway. its not like i care or anything. idiot. but also maaaaybe im kind of the worst person ever oopsies 🫢 and can you stop putting yourself in danger. its.................................. a lot of work for me and totally not concerning me at all. ugh why am i still stuck in this goddamn job. yeah i know i couldve left like a year ago, im staying here because. because. um. well im too USEFUL now the entire place would fall apart without me. who else is gonna do your paperwork huh?? i do it way better than all of you because all of you SUCK ASS at everything around here. no its not like i Care that much. like yeah youre my friends but i already warned you ages ago about the consequences of keeping me around so you deserve me complaining to you actually.

otto, doing something bad: i LITERALLY mean well okay :<<<< this is FOR YOUR OWN GOOD why arent you thanking me on the spot and listening to my advice already. ive never been wrong about anything EVER in my whole life. you should be bowing down to me and kissing my little forehead and telling me im right BECAUSE I AM. im the BEST PERSON EVER right now. i LITERALLY deserve so much better than this. im going to save all of your asses and then youre going to come fucking crawling back to me the moment you need me again, i guarantee it <3 im Extremely useful and youd miss me the moment im gone. right? right. right. im right, right? please notice me and listen to my extremely good advice 🥺 why are you saying its bad advice??? cmonnn stop ignoring me :((( just because im lying to you, keeping secrets from you, manipulating you, hoping everyone else dies for your sake, repeatedly trying to abandon millions of people, etc etc DOESNT MEAN that im wrong and ive Never been wrong. Ever. .......yeah a bunch of people are gonna die, so what? have they tried like, not standing in the way of my goals? 🥺

[farmerlesbian]

hi farmer lesbian!

so ive identified as bisexual for a long time but ive discovered recently i feel very comfortable within the lesbian ideas of gender and specifically the butchfemme community. i’ve been dating someone recently who also identified as bisexual but has related to transmasc lesbians understanding of gender as well as posts about butches. we both kind of see ourselves within the butchfemme dynamic but i’ve been very tough on myself with calling myself a lesbian because i’ve dated a man before (…in middle school..)

it’s gotten to the point where i’m really worried to label myself because of what it’d imply for my partner? but also what people would say? and while i know i dont HAVE to label myself it just sucks to know theres an identity im drawn to and feel like i fit into that i cant immediately slip into

hmm i'm not really sure how to guide you here. i guess i want to challenge you on some of the things you're saying here, it feels like you're coming at this from maybe the "wrong" angle (wrong feels too harsh a word, maybe just not the most helpful angle)

you're worried you can't call yourself a lesbian because you dated a boy in middle school? i think.. a LOT of lesbians dated boys in jr. high and high school and there are lots of late in life lesbians who were married to men for years before figuring out who they are and coming out. this is all completely normal and common. like, dating one boy in middle school doesn't really mean much tbh. i wouldn't base your identity or label you use around something like that. i dated a bunch of boys in high school and early college when i was still figuring out who i was. your labels or identity or gender or sexuality don't need to account for all you life experiences and past. it's not so much about your sexual history but describing who you are *now*, what you're interested in, in the present.

you say both you and your partner really like Lesbian Genders and butch/femme stuff. that's nice, but liking and relating to lesbian culture and gender stuff doesn't make you a lesbian haha! it's who you're attracted to and who you're not, that determines your orientation. gender and orientation are different things, as i'm sure you know. obviously very connected and stuff. like, for example, just because someone identifies as a man it doesn't make him straight, even though heterosexuality is an integral part of manhood, in the dominant culture. gay trans men are certainly not rare! the same goes for you guys.

also, remember that transmasculinity is a broad umbrella and encompasses a wide variety of people and their identities and experiences. plenty of butches aren't transmasc, and probably most transmascs aren't butch.

i will tell you that in the course of running this blog and being on the internet, i've probably seen and shared thousands of photos and drawing of people. not once have i ever seen something that represents me and my wife. if you are seeking out representation or examples of the options to be, in order to figure out who/what you are, i would advise against that. seek what feels true to you, what feels honest and right. you do not need to be similar to other people in order to find belonging, acceptance, and community. (though of course this is absolutely nothing wrong or bad if you do find others just like you, if you do fit in to existing roles and dynamics! that is of course perfectly normal!)

now, i don't know you or your partner. you know yourselves best. i can't tell you what you really are or really aren't. and i certainly am not going to tell you what you can or can't be! everything i'm saying here is to prompt you to think about and questions to ponder for yourself.

so, i think you have some points to think about, why have you been identifying as bisexual? what is drawing you to the lesbian label? have you tried using 0 labels and not thinking about your identity or labels for at least a month or two (if not a several months) and then coming back and evaluating it afresh? what about the butch-femme dynamic are you drawn to? what is holding you back? you are allowed to discover that you are a lesbian! or you are allowed to continue to be bisexual! i can't tell you who you are - but you're allowed to be and do whatever you want, whatever feels true to you! even if it doesn't make sense to other people or you don't see anyone else like you out there. you gotta be a little bit brave!

hang in there, and sending much love to you and yours! 🧡

[askata]

a thought about cos because Ive been playing it lately and Im so fascinated by it in some way, so heres what I think about it

theres a lot of talk around the whole idea of the game itself, a lot of arguing over what is right and what is wrong. carebears, kos, that kind of stuff. its a topic for a lot of survival games, its really only tradition. I personally dont think theres any specific way it should be played. the mechanics are there, but its all a suggestion and no one can stop you from how you play with it

its a survival game with social and cosmetic aspects, it also encourages strategy but will not make it a dire mechanic of your run. it allows room to breathe and sit and talk but not without the looming threat of some larger creature. it balances the risk of death with the social comfort of the open map and chat

its not a forgiving game in many aspects (specifically the death point system (I used to farm points, its hell)) but its also not entirely unempathetic. you can be rewarded for your work and dedication, and there are so many positive aspects of giving it a try instead of tossing in the towel. just because it says you might not win against something doesnt mean its not worth the fight, and often times its more satisfying to die fighting than to die trying to escape

when you sit back to think about it, its a beautifully balanced game. sure, the pay system can seem really unfair, and the economy side of things can be strange. it can also be extremely frustrating to be a collector or someone who leans into the trade side of things, but I think the frustration of it is intentional. its not meant to be easy, and thats what makes it so fun!!

Im not a huge trader, seller, buyer, whatever. I dont really like collecting things either. I like playing as creatures I feel confident handling and fighting with. I like to socialize, but I also love the anxiety of being a creature in a world of other strange and unpredictable creatures. the constant threat of death is a thrill that enriches the positive feelings of survival and risk taking

you start to feel proud of yourself, and then you begin to accept your losses when they come around. fairness goes both ways, you cant always win and call it an equal balance

I love seeing people have fun, even if that fun is mindless slaughter or the aggressive helicopter parent treatment. admittedly, Ive been under every single one of the labels you could think of, outside of the roleplay stuff. Ive kosed, Ive carebeared, Ive been an anklebiter, Ive logged before, Ive whatever.

(never really got into roleplaying on there, unless you count being in a pack of the same creature and acting in a "lore accurate" way (hunting, traveling together, nesting, etc etc) but I dont mind the roleplayers. you guys are cool, and I respect the determination despite how people talk about you guys. you do you, just be safe and follow the rules :) ❤️)

what matters is that I find it to be both mechanically and mentally rewarding. I love this game, even though it sucks sometimes, and it glitches out, and hackers can be a bit of a pain if theyre mass killing, but whatever!!! games have flaws, and Im happy with that

anyway, this was a big ramble. I appreciate this game a lot, I love it for what it is, and its super fun to get home after a long day and be weird and happy without worrying about much else

[wooden-spaceship]

I've made a few maps in Minecraft over time. I'll show a few of them here with a bit of trivia. From Largest to Smallest. Dead Bird Desert

Dead Bird Desert is by far the biggest map out of all of mine. The Canyon itself took me about 3 days to complete and Dead bird Studio took me 5 days to complete, but sadly chisle and bits sucks because of performance drops, so I need to redo all of Dead Bird Studio.

The Front of the Owl Express used to have wrong colors, since in Train rush theres a shader applied, which makes red, gray and blue parts have completely different colors. The Airship

The Second Largest map that I've created, I mean you can look at the first Image, its a massive map. The Airship's Bridge/Cockpit was the first area I started to work on and If Im gonna be honest, The first version sucked ass.

Liberty County

The most out of place map I've done, it's literally a roblox game. Got cancelled because it wasnt really fun rebuilding it. I gave a random youtuber an unfinished version of this map. National Museum of History and Culture

Nothing really said about this one except that the Layout of the Museum is official since Puffball has a floorplan which he showed during his dev playthrough. West Mesa Penitentiary

It's not the largest but it's the second tallest map I ever did. I also did a render of the bathroom but it's literally all black, that's one hour of my life wasted. City of Calcite and Adventure, Calcite era

Nothing really said about this one, other than that this was from a very early a hat in time, search up A Hat in Time's cutting room floor wiki for more info. Breaking the Bank

Again, nothing wrong with this one, expect for the dome at the top of the bank, it looks ugly, I hate it. Theres also a bunch of maps I didnt finish since Im a lazy person

The last one has a lot of details

[ladymidnight24]

Ok, so I know I'm totally just preaching to the choir on here, but I wanted to rant for a second and this is the only place I'm willing to do it, so-

Scrolling through the sad remains of Twitter today, I came across this post:

And I got super excited because I feel like I rarely see people flaunting their Asexuality like this (outside of the community here on Tumblr, that is), so I was just like "Oh fuck yeah, Ace rep!"

Then I made the mistake of scrolling through the comments... and that's really what this post is about, I just wanted a quick vent over some of the more repeated sentiments that I found.

(She responded to a few of them herself and I left in her responses, because yas queen, clap back at them!)

But anyway, quick tale of my experience as a bi-ace person: First and foremost, I think I look good/attractive/whatever and at times I do want to flaunt that because if I'm really feeling the way I look, why shouldn't I be encouraged to show off my muscles or wear a shirt that accentuates my boobs or pants that show off my ass? So yeah, I dress in a "sexual" manner from time to time, especially at pride where it lowkey feels like part of the point a lot of the time, and no, I'm not looking for any serial attention from that and yes, that is okay and normal and people need to stop acting like showing skin means you're some desperate whore (not that theres anything wrong with people who *are* hyper sexual in any way, Im just venting my own experience here).

Also, there were a lot of comments about why protection and rights matter for Ace people when at their most extreme they are A) not have sex and B) can basically go incognito in society and no one needs to know. But more complicated than that, isn't it? Because first of all, not all ace people are fully celibate (Im not) and all ace people I know personally still want to be in a relationship, just not necessarily a sexual one. In my case I got super lucky with my first major partner in that I was able to explain it to him and have him understand that I only get properly horny once in a blue moon, so if he wants sex, he needs to initiate and if Im really not feeling it at all, he needs to be okay with that. We were able to work out what the sexual part of our relationship would look like and things worked out, but, like I said, we were *lucky*.

And on the topic of commication and safety, that stuff is a two way street, it doesn't always help to be upfront about it. I have a friend who's fully non-sexual Ace and the first relationship they got into after feeling solid in that identity they *did* tell their partner right away that they're ace and explained that they're not interested in anything sexual at all and their partner responded by LYING and saying that he was fully non-sexual ace too, but then months into the relationship he tried to start shit and when she reminded him that she didn't want that he suddenly was talking about how they only think that because they've never had sex before, and they just need to change the medication they're taking because *thats* the cause and it's actually just religious trauma that makes her think she doesn't want it and he effectively tried to gaslight them into thinking they were straight when that is absolutley NOT the case and it's taken YEARS for them to feel solid in her identity again, not to mention start dating again (her current partner is lovely genuinely accepting and Im super happy for them)

So anyway, I just wanted to rant about this because it fucking SUCKS to constantly have people tell you that your too sexual to actually be ace or your unnatural for not wanting sex or your just confused or whatever and it can lead to genuinely horrifying situations of being forced into very uncomfortable situations because you're being gaslit by people who are supposed to and claim to love you.

[angelsandemons]

Ok, I did want to share this little bit. I'm not sure how much of this is going to be blog canon since Bill is very obviously an extremely unreliable narrator here, but it's the most canon backstory we've got for him since the show first aired. And this isn't the whole backstory covered in the book by any means; in the very next couple pages, it talks about meeting the henchmaniacs in other dimensions and coming together with a sort of pirate crew-like dynamic. But these two pages are....interesting, to say the least.

[Image Description: Screenshots of the first and second pages of "The Early Years" section of The Book of Bill. The first page includes a picture of a baby Bill wearing big Velcro shoes. The second page has a lot of text effectively redacted with a glitchy effect. Full plain text (except for the heading formatting) transcription of the two pages can be found below the read more. End Image Description.]

The Early Years

Let's get something out of the way-there's no way for your 3D mind to process my 2D homeworld unless you chug expired milk while looking at a kaleidoscope. But since were pals, I'll beam an image directly into your brain. Of me as a baby! Aww! I had Velcro shoes that squeaky when I ran! Everyone loved me immediately, and the mayor dubbed me the best baby of all time," made my birthday a holiday, and gave out free knives.

Look, I know you want some tragic backstory that humanizes me and makes my sharp edges easier to swallow, but if you came to a triangle looking for depth, you're barking up the wrong treatise! Truth is I've always been loved and admired by all! But being special comes with a price.

You see, I wasn't just smarter than all the dull trapezoids and rhombuses sucking up my rightful oxygen. I had a gift, a rare mutation:

I could see into the third dimension.

No one else in my stifling pancake of a reality understood what I was talking about when I said there was a direction called "up." While they were all bumping around like ants in a terrarium, I could see a world of infinite glittering potential beyond the sliver of forgettable gruel that was my home reality. I looked up and saw the stars. And I was ready to be one.

Technically, talking about a "third" dimension was illegal in my world. But I knew that everyone would be grateful if they could be freed from their delusions!

It was time to put on a show!

I came up with a plan to show everyone what they were missing! I simpl [redacted] their screams getting louder [redacted] and louder as I [redacted] so much blood!!! so much [redacted] mandibles [redacted] my hands, shaking as I realized I could never undo th [redacted] was the last one breathi [redacted] pisodes of "Family Matter [redacted] until there was no one left but me, covered in blood, alone in the universe.

Huh, that's weird! For some reason, whenever I try to talk about that day, theres this loud buzzing in my ears and I black out for 30 seconds.

Well, we can come back to it! The important thing is, I freed myself from my suffocating world, and freed everyone else too, and everyone loved me for it, and everyone was fine! And that's all there is to say about that! The new dimension I escaped to had a job vacancy for the role of "Galactic Overlord." I humbly obliged!