#i made so many wrong choices
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so the quarry FINALLY came out on gamepass and i just finished my first play through so i thought id show you guys how i did
THE QUARRY SPOILERS AHEAD
i somehow missed a path, but i think it's cause i chose to cut dylan's hand off
Total Playtime: 11hrs 26min 30s
Emma
Died (im slow and missed the quick time)
Kaitlyn
Died (i forgot about the rabbit)
Jacob
Died (i couldn't figure out the cage thing )
Dylan
Died (kaitlyn's a bitch)
Ryan
Alive
Laura
Alive
Max
Alive
Nick
Alive
Abi
Alive
Kaylee
Died (duh..)
Caleb
Alive
Travis
Alive
Constance
Died (she was ugly)
Jedediah
Died (i hate old men)
Bobby
Died (i stabbed him :])
Chris
Died (i had to make sure ryan survived)
Silas
Died (fuck that bitch)
Evidence
7/10
Freakshow Fire
7/9
Hackett History
13/19
Camp History
7/12
Tarot
14/22
Paths
-Laura and Max
•Laura tried to help Max after he was attacked in the storm shelter.
•Max was concerned about Laura's well-being in the prison.
•Laura was sympathetic to Max over his rejection letter.
•Laura was supportive of Max during their imprisonment.
-Above the Law
□Laura lied to the cop about the accident on the road.
□Laura tried to make a grab for Travis' gun when they were talking in the cell.
□Laura used the syringe on Travis during her and Max's escape.
□Laura shot Constance in the head.
□In a fit of rage, Laura killed Jedediah.
□Travis decided to work with Laura to find Silas.
- A Fool's Errand
▪︎Jacob uncoupled the fuel line when sabotaging the minivan.
▪︎Jacob's tampering cause the minivan to catch alight.
▪︎Due to Jacob's actions, the minivan can't be repaired.
-Down the Rabbit Hole
¤Abi chose to help Emma break into the cabin.
¤Abi was able to explore inside the cabin
¤Abi put the forgotten toy in her bag.
¤Abi left her backpack in the lodge kitchen.
¤Kaitlyn, Abi, and Nick were able to hide in the cabin without alerting the creature.
¤Dylan was bitten by the creature when trying to hook up the feedback loop.
¤With nothing to use as a distraction, Kaitlyn hid in the freezer and froze to death.
-Playing with Fire
◇Emma chose not to take the fireworks with her.
◇Emma fired the shotgun into the air when rejoining the others.
-Watch Your Step
☆Dylan opened the trapdoor in Chris' office.
☆Dylan loosened a rung on the ladder.
☆The ladder rung broke when Abi climbed up.
-Pieces of Silver
~Abi came to Nick's aid when he was attacked in the woods.
~Abi shot Nick in the poolhouse, and he fled out the window.
~Abi offered Laura her bracelet to fashion into a silver bullet.
-Finders Keepers
♤Ryan struggled to navigate through the woods.
♤Ryan heard a rustling in the bushes but didn't shoot. Nick came stumbling out.
-Distraction
♡Jacob threw dirt at the hunter to distract him.
♡Jacob escaped the hunter.
♡Ryan heard a rustling in the bushes but didn't shoot.
♡Jacob was captured by the hunters.
-Helping Hand
♧Ryan decided to sever Dylan's hand.
♧Ryan used a chainsaw to sever Dylan's hand.
♧Dylan's infection stopped spreading.
-The White Whale
○Laura did not shoot Travis when escaping her cell.
○Ryan shot Chris Hackett with silver, curing his line of infection.
○Ryan survived the ordeal at the Hackett House.
○Laura, Travis, and Ryan decided to work together to find Silas.
○Laura, Travis, and Ryan run Silas down after he attacked the car.
○Laura killed Silas, ending his line of infection and curing every living person who was bitten at Hackett's Quarry.
-Teambuilding
●Dylan and Kaitlyn went to the scrapyard to find a working vehicle.
●Dylan and Kaitlyn worked together to escape the scrapyard.
●Abigail found a silver shell in the stormshelter.
●Kaitlyn has Dylan's company in the lodge.
●Kaitlyn ignored the office door and ran to the kitchen.
●Kaitlyn abandoned Dylan to Caleb.
-Love's Labours Lost
■Ryan decided to free Jacob from the basement.
■Ryan could not figure out the cage doors.
■Laura and Ryan heard more of Travis and Constance's conversation.
■Jacob remained in the basement.
■All the cage doors opened when Laura broke the fusebox.
■The werewolf killed Jacob in the basement.
-A Pound of Flesh
°Ryan chose not to remove the knife from his stab wound.
°Ryan had to be careful not to exacerbate his injury as he fled from Bobby.
°Ryan removed the knife from his wound and stabbed Bobby.
°Ryan chose to accept Laura's offer to bite him.
°Bobby was weakened and unable to defend himself against Chris.
°Ryan was saved from blood loss.
Achievements
22/40
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
Plain-text version:
Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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TAYLOR SWIFT: THE ERAS TOUR (2023)
#taylor swift#tswiftedit#tswiftgif#eras tour#taylor swift the eras tour#I'm eXHAUSTED#I dont think I ever made thIS MANY gifs in one set#I personally am proud of the choice I made on every transition gif in the middle#sorry speak now and acoustic section you're too short so I put you together in the obvious wrong order - for color arrangement purpose#forgive me :'p#userelena#userleah#btw - I made folklore teal...unintentional. who'd thought#flashing gif#flashing images#flashing tw
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wanted to say I appreciate your nuanced takes on MW and especially Curly. i don't get the claim that the fandom is full of Curly apologists when majority (esp yt and tiktok) say he's worse than Jimmy. Yes there's commentary about bro culture defending people, he def messed up in trying to placate Jimmy (tbh "we'll fix this" sounded more like trying to keep someone prone to outbursts like Jim calm and not hurt Anya/himself) but I don't think he did nothing to help Anya, since she continued to confide in him and he had less than a week to resolve it before the crash (I also don't get everyone saying he knew for ages when it seems like Anya told him that same week). I get Jimmy's a pos but saying stuff like Curly should've known he'd crash the ship or that Jim had a criminal record he ignored, reducing them to obviously horrible villain and willfully ignorant sidekick feels like a disservice to the game. If your best friend turned out to be horrible, what would you do in a confined space in the span of a few days to respond? I'd say some of the horror comes from trying to do good but ultimately failing, Curly's state after the crash is meant to be tragic horror not revenge/punishment
Thank you and this is what I want to get across.
A lot of information we have to supplement when it comes to how long things have been happening on this current ship. I think people try to add on to the horror and negligence by making things more obvious so it can feel like it was easier to avoid when, true to life, its not. Jimmy clearly didn't deserve or appreciate what Curly did for him in getting him the job, but do you think if Jimmy was that big of a menace on Earth he would've given him a position where he could have that level of power over people's lives? There's something in the fact he specifically chose to pick a position so close to himself where he could watch Jimmy.
I hate the bro code argument because that is a whole can of worms people really don't get. That sort of mentality is born from the general respect and preference of male matter over female ones. Curly is clearly not that guy, he is absent minded about the issue and inadvertently dismissive but he clearly believes Anya, he just can't understand what she's going through. It's an onslaught of information that no one really reacts right to. Additonally, the entire discussion of her assualt plays to heavy into the idea that there is fault outside of the perpertratior when it comes to SA. It's too close if she only did this or if Curly had protected her better but the fact of the matter is Jimmy did what he did. He did it before any of the conversations with Anya about it and it's why her behavior seemed to change so drastically in those last two days.
He has other conflicting thought and while his role as a Captain should've taken over, people act like it's not a very human thing to have such a toxic presence cloud your judgement. It is never easy to separate friend from coworker once that connection is formed, you want to help them, especially if they were friend first and for a long while like in this case. It's not right, but people act like it would be easy when the game clearly points out that no choice is easy to make, especially when you have to make it for more than one person. You have the weigh the consequences, look at all the options and make a plan. People can headcanon and decide how long things where happening, but if we look at what we were presented through the characters eyes, the only person given time to do that was Jimmy.
He waited two months after the crash to appoint himself Captain. Every time a problem was brought up he immediately took action and refused to sit on it and find a better solution. I think it's important to look at the warped way Jimmy takes initiative where Curly didn't as it works as a good contrast of why you don't just run in to "fix" things. The quickest and easiest option may not be the safest or most beneficial. I think some thoughts on the game suffer from the black and white thinking the game doesn't operate on along with us being voyeurs. We see what exactly led to what but the characters don't. They don't have the hindsight and foresight we do and even ours is scrambled by the non-linear story telling.
Like it's hard to talk abuou those grey zones without sounding like an apologist because you're explaining why taking responsibility isn't easy. It's not and it's weird to act like it would be in a scenerio that led up to the events of the game knowing what we know. We see all these characters in such isolated moments with various things before, in between, after and even during we aren't privy too. The idea that Jimmy is worse than Curly heavily banks on the words Jimmy was saying to Jimmy before he crashed the ship. That whatever happened on the ship was his responsibility to bare, which is true due to his position. But, are they not still not responsible for taking the actions Curly then must bare?
Like i feel like people think that these are situation that become easier with age or when you are in a postion of authority and they aren't. You don't lose your biases or gain some sudden knowledge that makes it easier. It just becomes more tiring as you keep dealing with it. I would be first in line to say Curly fucked up and should've done more but the idea he knew how bad it could get or he really saw the worst in the people around him and ignored it pretty much ignores a huge aspect of his character and the game.
#i do believe Anya was a victum to Jimmy more than once before the crash but the game plays wit the sort of fear of waiting and stagnation#i believe the reason she decided to tell him was becasuse she finally broke down and tested to see if she was pregnant after one too many#signs and its why she went to hide the gun because she knew now that there was proof of what Jimmy did and was he would do anything to#cover it up and while she also didn't want the baby there was no sure fire way to safely induce a miscarriage or abortion cause shes smart#enough to know that hence her reading the illusion of choice and taking measures to protect herself#but in the hypothetical it was a one time occurence I think Jimmy would act like one single mistake shouldn't define him and Anya thinks#that if she did something sooner or said something sooner than she or Curly could've stopped all of it but that the hard thing taking actio#its so hard to be preventative to a person like they also have the autonomy to do things and no one on the ship is okay with actively takin#that away outside of Jimmy that its just a delicate issue and people act like it was a conscious choice not to help when he just helped#wrong he did wrong by not immediately punishing Jimmy but at the same time did he even fully get it yet? Jimmy immediately got into his hea#after like the sound design right before he confront him is telling like every track sort of gives you the feeling of the characters where#we cant see their thoughts because again the only two characters pov we get are Jimmy's and Curly's and even then we only get Curly's thru#the responsibilites he has to take like he is always tasked with something because thats his role but we rarely see him do something off hi#own volition cause hes a metaphorical cog in many of the machines the games comments on but he's not actively pulling a switch#also i think people latch on to the we can both be heros things too much when analyzing Curly because Curly very much is not happy being th#leader and current “hero” of the Tulpar he just wants out in a way that doesn't hurt and while he is still responsible for not doing more#the idea he could've easily nipped this in the butt acts like Jimmy was not a beast of his own and that he made Jimmy into the person he wa#vs the fact that Jimmy is a person on his own right that makes these choices others are forced to take responsibility for when he simply c#couldve not done evil shit like at the end of the day Curly is not perfect but not nearly or remotely as bad as Jimmy because for that hed#have to not care hed have to not have tried hed have to not try to take responsibility and he did just not in the right way but thats#subjective to the person and you can only realize you did fuck up after the results are before you and its tragic like this game is a#a tragedy no matter how you try and spin it. There's lessosn to be learnt but at the end of the day it telling the worst moments of peoples#lives and the certain inevitabilities that come with it#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#nurse anya#anya mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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Wei Wuxian and Narrative Agency – Part Three
For Xiantober Day Five: Past and Present, in which the author gets very unhinged about what parts of the past are shown and how that’s affected by the present!
(Part One | Part Two | Full version on AO3)
The Power of Agency: Shaping the Narrative
When I've discussed Wei Wuxian's agency previously, I’ve talked about how what’s shown and omitted tells us about a character, and we’ve talked about the character himself. Though this is a niche topic, it’s not necessarily something out of the ordinary to analyse, and we can assume everything up to here has been in some way intentional.
This? Linking structure to a character’s in-universe preferences?
This is where we get unhinged.
Before I start, let’s quickly establish something which will be important later: although Wei Wuxian is the central character, MDZS isn’t strictly from his POV. While omitting events a character doesn’t like to dwell on and concealing things the character wishes to hide is common in books with only one narrator, MDZS has multiple narrators which it switches between relatively quickly. This includes Wei Wuxian, but it also includes nearly every major character that appears in the story, and omniscient narrator as well. As a default, this format doesn’t lead to this deliberate shaping and omission because of one character’s preferences, since we have many other sources of information and events – which is what makes Wei Wuxian’s influence over the narrative and structure so interesting. We could have access to a lot more information, and access to it at different times, than we do (and that’s not an insult, quite the opposite!).
To begin: we’ve established that times such as Wei Wuxian’s time on the streets, his three months in the Burial Mounds and his loss in the Siege aren’t shown because Wei Wuxian has little agency there. But that’s not the only special thing about them. They’re also the three most traumatic times in his life, and so moments Wei Wuxian himself either can’t remember, or doesn’t like to dwell on.
This is why discussing Wei Wuxian’s treatment of tragedy in his life was important. Firstly, it shows he doesn’t focus on the tragedy in his life, so the idea that the narrative not focusing on this tragedy relates to his character has merit; secondly, it affirms that this is not a passive trait, but a choice. Therefore, when the narrative omits events due to this aspect of Wei Wuxian, it’s respecting not only a character detail – which would be cool by itself – but also an active decision. One that shapes the story it’s made in.
In other words, its very structure is respecting Wei Wuxian’s agency!
Now, of course there are flashbacks to other moments of his past he probably wouldn’t like to dwell on, too. But within the structure, they’re only shown when Wei Wuxian is thinking about them (or when he has reason to)!
Wei WuXian hadn’t woken up yet. His eyes were still tightly shut, yet his hand didn’t let go either. He seemed to be dreaming, muttering, “… Don’t… Don’t be angry…” Lan WangJi seemed somewhat surprised. His voice was gentle, “I am not angry.” Wei WuXian, “… Oh.” Hearing this, as though he finally felt assured, his fingers loosened. Lan WangJi sat beside Wei WuXian for a while. Seeing that he was motionless again, he was about to stand up when Wei WuXian grabbed him with his other hand, hugging his arm and refusing to let go. He shouted, “I’ll go with you, quick, take me back to your sect!” Chapter 63, EXR translation
Which, of course, is him dwelling on…
Lan WangJi spoke one word at a time, “Go back to Gusu with me.” Hearing this, both Wei WuXian and Jiang Cheng were surprised. Quickly afterward, Wei WuXian laughed, “Go back to Gusu with you? To the Cloud Recesses? Why go there?” He immediately seemed to realize, “Oh. I forgot. Your uncle Lan QiRen hates crooked people like me. You’re his proudest disciple, so of course you’re the same as him, haha. I refuse.” Chapter 62, EXR translation
…the painful flashback immediately preceding this. The third set of flashbacks (which are also painful) are a similar case. Look at the contex:
He lifted the bottom of his robe, revealing a prosthetic leg made of wood, “This leg of mine was destroyed by you, that night in the Nightless City (…)” (…) “Wei WuXian, I won’t ask you if you remember or not. Both of my parents died by your hands. You owe too many people. You definitely won’t remember them either. But, I, Fang MengChen, will never forget! And never forgive you!” (…) “In the fight at Qiongqi Path, my son was strangled to death by your dog Wen Ning!” “My shixiong died by poison, his entire body festering due to your cruel curse!” Chapter 68 (immediately preceding the flashbacks), EXR translation
And Wei Wuxian’s own thoughts and words:
Wei WuXian looked at the cultivators before the Demon-Slaughtering Cave. Their expressions were the absolute same as those of the cultivators from the night of the pledge conference, pouring their wine on the ground as they took the pledge to scatter the ashes of the Wen Sect’s remnants and him. (…) Wei WuXian, “Now it’s time to ask just whom it is that treasures it so much. It’s like Wen Ning. Back then, some certain sects or so were scared to death of the Ghost General. They said they’d kill him on the surface, but behind their backs they hid him for over ten years. How strange. Who was the one that said his ashes had been scattered back then?” Chapter 79 (immediately succeeding the flashbacks), EXR translation
Once again, Wei Wuxian’s own thoughts relate to the flashbacks we’ve just been shown. And, as I previously mentioned, though all the events which are shown are tragic, they’re also events which Wei Wuxian’s own choices and actions shaped – which he has this to say about:
“The things I did, not only do you remember them, I remember them too. You won’t forget them, and they’ll stay even longer in my mind!” Chapter 82, EXR
Admittedly, this applies more to the third set of flashbacks than the second (which is still fitting as the third set was the most recent), as in the second, although he still had agency within and influence over his circumstances, the majority of the pain was caused by others’ actions (excluding, of course, the Golden Core transfer… which is something we know stays for a long time in his mind, albeit with a caveat we’ll soon discuss). But it’s still important to note – especially considering that otherwise, focusing on this very painful time in his life wouldn’t seem like something very in-character for Wei Wuxian to do.
Of course, this can all just be explained by good writing. It is best to insert flashbacks when they’re relevant to the characters and events in the present day! But it is interesting to compare these to the start of the (not painful) Gusu flashbacks, which open this way:
At a later time, Wei WuXian pondered upon the reason why his relationship with Lan WangJi wasn’t good. Getting to the root of the matter, everything started when he was fifteen, coming to the GusuLan Sect with Jiang Cheng to study for three months. Chapter 13, EXR
Again, considering the circumstances around which these flashbacks take place – returning to the Cloud Recesses for the first time since the lectures, and meeting Lan Wangji once more – it makes complete sense for Wei Wuxian to be thinking about these events*. So it does fit the pattern of Wei Wuxian dwelling on something, thus leading to the narrative dwelling on it, too (and being shaped by his thoughts)… but there’s another layer to this. Importantly, it is the only flashback where Wei Wuxian’s present thoughts don’t lead to this happening, with his thoughts at an unspecified future time leading to it, instead. I like to interpret this as the text saying that, since these events aren’t something Wei Wuxian wouldn’t focus on in normal circumstances, he can dwell on them at any time. Therefore, they’re free to come up in the narrative at any time as well, even if he’s not dwelling on them in the present moment!
So, to summarise: Wei Wuxian’s decision not to focus on the painful times in his life directly influences the narrative to not focus on these times. When painful times are brought up and shown to us, it’s in the context of him thinking about them in the present day, and even then, his most painful moments still aren’t shown to us. His agency in this regard is still respected by the narrative structure.
This is the main way his agency influences the structure of the narrative, but I’d like to talk about the revealing and concealing of information, too. For example, I said I’d talk about the Golden Core transfer – though Wei Wuxian does think about this many times, as evidenced by his internal narration in Chapter 103. But unlike everything we’re shown through the flashbacks, this is something Wei Wuxian is actively trying to hide from others. And the narrative respects this choice (Wei Wuxian’s agency, again), never reveals it even when it would be relevant in the flashbacks, and we find out not through narration, but through a character’s dialogue!
And to clarify – I know these aspects may not be in the book for this exact reason. Showing flashbacks in relevant moments is good writing, concealing an important plot point you want to do a reveal for is necessary writing, and MXTX has said she didn’t want to write about Wei Wuxian’s time in the Burial Mounds, due to not liking to write transformation sequences (and also because it would not be pleasant at all, which likely also applies to Wei Wuxian’s death). That doesn’t prevent it from also being intentional – MXTX’s intelligence is shown in many aspects of this book, and there’s nothing disproving it – but there’s no proof for either option, so I won’t pretend there is. I bring this up because I know this feels like I’m overanalysing, as I feel that way as well.
But, whether it’s intentional or not, it exists in the text, and I adore it – so, regardless, it’s something I’ll explore. Because taking this into account… We aren't just told about Wei Wuxian having agency, we aren’t just shown it in the text, we aren’t even just shown it through which parts of his past are shown and hidden in the structure of the text (as I talked about in Part One). The parts of the past that are shown and hidden also have an in-universe reason for being shown and hidden, this reason being the choices he makes! Agency is the ability of a character to influence the story they’re in, but Wei Wuxian’s agency, as a property of a character who only exists in-universe, shapes the out-of-universe structure as well! That’s how we’re shown its importance! How cool is that?
At The End Of The Road: Summary and Final Thoughts
In this essay, we’ve covered how important Wei Wuxian’s agency is not only to the events of the plot, but to the structure of the narrative as well. The narrative omits periods in which Wei Wuxian has little or no agency, in favour of showing us periods in which he does, even when important events happened in the former. This indicates that who Wei Wuxian is without agency isn’t important enough to be shown to the audience, and therefore that his agency is an integral aspect of his character in MDZS. We’ve discussed how both in-universe and out-of-universe, tragedy does not define him – out-of-universe, the tragic events in Wei Wuxian’s life are used not to build sympathy but rather to show his strength of character and who he still is despite going through them; and in-universe, he chooses not to focus on the negativity and resentment caused by his circumstances or others’ actions, instead staying true to his moral compass and enjoying his life in the present day. Finally, we’ve also explored how this choice is another reason for the omission of certain events from the narrative, resulting in his agency shaping the story in a very literal way – it affects the out-of-universe structure, as well.
It’s quite fitting, for a story whose essence is about defying a conventional narrative – that of righteous clans rising up and defeating a great evil – and about a character who defies many conventional narratives on his own – that of status defining how skilled you could be, that for a golden core being necessary for cultivation and other paths being unavailable, that of a tragic but complete story of someone killed for staying true to their moral code (instead, that character returns to life and has a happy ending) – to have its own narrative play a role in such an important and interesting way.
(Or, if an image would be preferable:)
Thank you for reading!
(Part One | Part Two | Full version on AO3)
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*This strong relation to the present day circumstances is another reason I love the flashback placement so much (and why I think it’s such a loss both screen adaptions altered it so strongly)!
#get ready for tag thoughts because there are a LOT of them#it’s for THIS reason that fanon wwx bothers me so much (didn’t want to get negative on the acual post)#bc so often all the changes are changes that woobify him!#self-sacrificial idiot wwx?? only doing things because… poor him he has so many internal issues and values himself so little-#-so of course he’d sacrifice everything before thinking of another option? woobifying#(whenever he sacrifices something it’s a deliberate choice to act on his morals because he values his morals so much – and he’s also very-#-capable and DOES often find ways for no people to get hurt!)#wasn’t aware that what happened to him at lotus pier was wrong and needs lwj to tell him that for him to have any idea if it?#woobifying (as we see in the lotus seed pod extra he KNOWS it’s unfair)#(he downplays it retroactively in his memory (links into not focusing on the bad things in his life))#(but that’s the actions themselves that are being downplayed not their fairness!)#he chooses to act! he is defined by acting! not tragedy – all the more impressive in the face of the amount of tragedy that’s happened#he could SO EASILY have been a woobie but instead he’s the opposite of one: defined BY his agency instead of the absence of it#that doesn’t mean he’s not impacted by tragedy or trauma – he is! but it’s not the most important aspect of his character (bc he doesn’t le#it’s also something that bothers me about the changes cql made#by making qq path and nightless city the fault of someone else it means he IS someone who’s more a victim of circumstance than anything els#he had no control over the tragedies of his first life at all#apart from ig his death being controlled by him? because he just leaps off the cliff during the nightless city siege?? but in THAT case it’#i watched that part recently (i’m getting through it very slowly) and yeah it reaffirmed my love for this aspect of the book even more#despite. having these exact thoughts for two years already#he also dwells on the past events a lot more than book wwx which adds to that version of him BEING defined more by tragedy rather than who#anyway over 7.3k words total (and 400 more in the tags apparently)... it'll be posted to ao3 in its completion this evening!#mdzs meta#my meta#wei wuxian#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#魔道祖师#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#gdc
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WELP. They are 100% doing it. They’re going to end the show on dramatic conflict with their first real kiss being synonymous with them getting caught and separated, and then we wait to see if they even get a season 2 and if so, how long we have to wait for it.
#i’m so irritated with this production team#they’ve made so many unnecessary choices here#and it sucks bc until this final stretch this show was so excellent#and the performances are phenomenal#and now i can’t even recommend it to people bc it’s gonna be unfinished and leave us in a terrible place#prove me wrong tomorrow show i am begging#the on1y one#taiwanese bl#shan shouts into the void
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“That oh from us, so much will grow.”
chance with you - mehro/choices - messermoon/chance with you - mehro/unknown/waiting room - phoebe bridgers/choices - @sophsicle/waiting room - phoebe bridgers/choices - messermoon/waiting room - phoebe bridgers/unknown/faking - koda/choices - messermoon/faking - koda/the last day of pompeii -karl bryullov/take me back - heroe/choices - messermoon/take me back - heroe/the last day of pompeii -karl bryullov/peter - taylor swift/choices - messermoon/unknown/somewhere only we know keane/choices - messermoon/somewhere only we know - keane/unknown/peter - taylor swift/choices - messermoon/peter - taylor swift/unknown/we're in love - boygenius/choices - messermoon/we're in love - boygenius/choices - messermoon/we're in love - boygenius/choices - messermoon
#trying to take on the entire fic... was a mistake i think#and the way i structured it nothing else fit :/#i wanted to add more quotes and stuff but it all looked wrong no matter where i put it#so just song lyrics and paintings will do#minus the first two#i got those first and just liked how they looked so they stayed#i feel like the way i made this with all the songs being separate is the only way it worked#but also it might be awful#idk#i like my lyrics though#i think they work for choices#there's also so many quotes i couldn't use from it#like i had so much more#but I couldn't use them#and Yeah i just used all of Reg's death#the scene is beautifully written what else am i meant to do?#idk :/#here is the web weave#and that's it from me#jegulus#choices by messermoon#regulus black#james potter#web weave#web weaving
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@pscentral event 26: minimalism
SILICON VALLEY (2014 - 2019) TOP 10 RATED EPISODES ON IMDB insp (1, 2)
#silicon valley#silicon valley hbo#siliconvalleyedit#officialhbo#hboedit#tvedit#smallscreensource#filmtvdaily#userstream#dailyflicks#cinemapix#tvarchive#mediagifs#televisiongifs#filmtvcentral#*gif#haven't seen a single person talk about this show in years but it's still my favorite show and always will be :)#(despite the obvious...issues)#but ignoring all that it's still a really well written show and i can't believe so many people don't know this exists!#also the music choices are so good i used to listen to the entire show's playlist at work :D#if you think i wouldn't be out here celebrating the 10 year anniversary of my favorite show you are wrong! i am mentally ill sorry! /srs#why else would i make the green in the captions the og (ugly as hell) pied piper logo and the 2nd from s3 that's just the hat#and why else would i have watched the show more than 10 times#despite these top 10 episodes i will say that intellectual property (4x03) is still my favorite one ever#jamie babbit director of all time <3#these gifs are so scuffed but idc i just needed to post something#in hindsight i could've made a more fun show summary sort of post but it's too late lmao#why did i say so much in the tags stfu me
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Make a poll of 5 of your fave characters, tag five mutuals - tagged by @afh48 tysm 💕
Trying to make a varied mix of characters from different media to enrich the enclosure of my followers (✿◡‿◡)
As for tags, I know some of y'all have already been tagged but I'm doing it again - @peanutdream @snowonebutyou @pulledpurplecurtains @acri-aurora and anyone who wants to do it?? no obligation if you don't like tag games!!
#tag game#polls#i know that's four tags but. I dont know enough people well enough to know if theyre okay with tags or not#also I keep debating which characters to actually put in here theres just so many options#I feel like regardless of who I put I'll feel like I made the wrong choice so. have these!
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Something that still doesn't sit right with me while being a part of the HOTD fandom is how Laena was done so dirty, from being placed as a "second" option for Daemon and having him keep her from returning home, from having her daughters see Driftmark, from seeing her own brother and parents before she died! That added on to the fact of how Daemon just sucked at loving her the way she deserved makes my blood boil. And to make matters worse, to drive the knife further, is during her funeral (added on to him laughing during it, which wasn't appropriate at all no matter the context or what anyone says) where she and her unborn son were only just recently placed at the bottom of the sea, Daemon and Rhaenyra sleep together and then marry each other all within the span of the same episode (don't even get me started on how they went heavy into the romantics of the moment but couldn't even bother to show Daemon be affection with Laena like he was in the books I believe).
And some in the fandom reaction to all this can be such a turn off. Because you can have people, mainly black fans, rightfully call out problems with this plot change, with Rhaenyra and Daemon sleeping together only right after Laena's funeral and will be met with so many heinous responses (a lot in which tie in with centering Rhaenyra and going "oh so you hate her" type beat) and it's so frustrating. That, and how we barely see Daemon interact with his daughters, let alone be affectionate as well as protective over them---that scene where the girls are bruised from a fight and clear in distress and yet Daemon doesn't even move to check on them nor go into a rage at the fact that his daughters were harmed, let alone the fact that his now dead wife's dragon was claimed by another on the day of her funeral. None of that. But will stand protectively by Rhaenyra and her sons' side without second thought. Make it make sense.
#hotd#house of the dragon#laena velaryon#daemon targaryen#rhaenyra targaryen#and it's so disheartening bc hotd producers made the velaryons black for obvs diversity points#and still could of had the same plot for that house and its characters with little problem#but instead they decided to do all the mess they did and it feels like such a disservice#you should know that you did something wrong when on of the actresses working with you goes#“hey....um...why was this plot added? is this necessary?”#and its a big reason why i don't really find myself being on any teams side in this verse#like yeah id choose rhae over aegon but i still have many choice words for her (daemon can choke)#the narrative really gives laena the disposable black girlfriend (or partner) trope just to move on to daemyra#that is so disrespectful#there's so much that i want to say but that'll be for another post#toxic daemyra stans dni!
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Karen: LMAO every guy I meet reminds me of my big brothers that's so funny except if Paul is already my brother and you're also a brother that's a bit awkward, huh Hot bartender: THATS MOVING REALLY FAST AND I LIKE YOU AS A PERSON BUT - Karen: having my brothers date would be SO WEIRD Hot bartender: Well on the bright side I literally cannot speak more than five words to him so we aren't dating because he's so cute
(Everyone else: that is somehow the most depressing bright side we never want to hear)
#my characters#oops i fell in love#I just think its really funny how i view so many of the cast as either the only child or#somehow still the only child but with twin cousins that he grew up with somewhat like siblings but is older than them#and then THESE TWO LOSERS (beloveds) are definitely younger siblings#there is no way Karen developed her personality without the help of older brothers#there is also a very funny and agonizing thing where she is super single cause she can't view a guy as more than a brother#she meets an asshole and is like wow just getting huge brother vibes from him wtf#and meets the nicest man possible and is like HOW IS HE ALSO LIKE A BROTHER I WILL NEVER LOVE ROMANTICALLY#and she has all of the guy friends and its very clear if they were interested she has long since friendzoned them#but its fine because they all are also convinced that shes exactly what it would be like to have a brother#so its fine its all good no one really agonizes over not romancing her and she just as a found family in everyone#hi my name is salmon and you may recall my feheroes experience where i want to give a certain male all of the siblings#the sibling adopter extraordinaire ? yeah thats basically karen now that i think about it#you know one time at work at my first job there was a girl who had a crush on a guy and we all worked the same shift a lot#and one day she was whining because he was so friendly to me and he looks at the girl straight faced and says#ITS BROS BEFORE HOES aint that right and im like uh huh sure thats exactly right#and later i told him i really wanted to know where she went wrong because i had a crush on him in school until he opened his mouth#and hes like yeah sucks to wanna date me you made the right choice#and i just ..... will never forget that weird guy#he saw me in a hoodie once and goes NO WAY I HAVE THE SAME ONE and then makes sure he brings it in next time we work together to prove it#he was like an annoying younger brother to me and i thought it was very funny that apparently i too am a sibling to him#i might be adopted and i might be biased but i think everyone could use an adopted sibling that they dont live with#thats a special bond ok im just sayin#also sorry its so late tonight i had some uhhhhhh problems haha
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i’m. a little bit wrecked over ashton in episode 78 y’all. i’m a little sad. just a little . i just. damn.
they hurt themself really fucking badly. and they could have killed their friends chasing something that was never theirs, chasing a reality that never was, that they never actually wanted in the first place. all because he was just fucking wrong about something. they just—they made a mistake. and it was the worst possible mistake they could have made. and i’m just thinking about how awful that is, to realize how little you actually value your own life in the middle of a crater you made with your own body because you just died and reformed and all you can think is how much you would have deserved to stay dead, to hurt forever, for the fact that the people before you were cruel and horrible and you mirrored them without a second thought in a matter of days.
like that’s so fucked dude. how do you rebuild a self esteem you never had after doing something so monumentally wrong. you stop using that false bravado because it won’t do you any good anymore, now that they all know how weak you are. how do you start caring about yourself when there’s so much to loathe, so much to make up for, so much to apologize for. that’s fucking terrible. how is he literally ever gonna trust himself again? trust his own judgement? trust what he wants? the last time he wanted something that badly it killed him and nearly broke his friends. like holy shit. how do you. how. how?
#cr#cr3#ashton greymoore#like holy shit. holy SHIIIITTTTT#this was like. the worst possible mistake ashton could have made#it makes me so sad. it makes me soooo sad. because i get it. i fully truly do#it’s ever fear i have about being wrong#it wasn’t as calculated as the group seems to think. it wasn’t a grand scheme#nothing ash does is like that#sure he thought it over. and made a poor choice. but honestly? just a mistake#all of them are time bombs and ashton just happened to go off first#they have every right to be mad. every right. it was a shitty thing to do#but i can’t help feeling incredibly sad for them. they’re not used to any of this.#i have many thoughts about this i need to post more about it lmao#roll history
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Sometimes seeing artists’ really old art (like, as kids old) makes me cry because I used to be that art kid! I drew a lot! My art looked like that! I could have learned!
Instead I stopped and now I’ll never start again… at least I have writing???
#post#being a creative is physically painful to me sometimes#I have so many ideas to draw write paint model sing etc etc#and no skills with which to do them#this because I chose STEM instead#sometimes I feel like I made the wrong choice but it’s way too late now :))))
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Y'know what honestly frustrates me about the JJK fandom?
When people make stuff that's like JJK 0 Gojo and Getou talking or whatever, and it's like Getou being totally deadpan about all the horrible things he's doing/going to do/believes in *insert various types of wholesale murder here* and Gojo just laughs along, treating it like it's a joke and Getou's so cute and funny.
Like, no.
Gojo did NOT indulge Getou's philosophy. That was The Whole Point.
What do you think the whole encounter on the street in front of a random KFC was about? That's why there was such a deep divide between them. That's why Gojo was furious and disbelieving. That's why they didn't see or talk to each other for TEN YEARS even thought they were best friends.
Because Getou killed people, chose to kill people, and chose to keep killing people. Because he dehumanized an entire, MASSIVE group of people who were good, bad, kind, cruel, and everything in between, men, women, children, everyone, simply because of something they couldn't help and didn't even know about. Because he took advantage of those that Gojo had decided and felt duty-bound- even though he didn't like it much- to protect.
(And all that came BEFORE Geotu ever stepped into the picture. Yeah, Gojo whines about having to protect the weak and admittedly thinks it's a drag, but he still does it. He was raised with the ideal that he should do it.
That wasn't a Getou thing. Getou believing in that as a teenager did change the way Gojo saw it, but it wasn't New. He already was raised that way, believed that way, and intended to live that way, or why go to Jujutsu High at all? Even if he found it annoying, he was still always going to become a sorcerer, not only because it was kind of his only option- which is it's own kind of horrible- but because he was a sorcerer, down to his bones.
He had that madness in him, and maybe it was nurtured, but that doesn't change the fact that it was there. He wanted to be a sorcerer, loved fighting and killing curses, whether it had anything to do with helping others or not.)
I know it's just fanart and fandom, and look, I myself really like art of Gojo and Getou in their good days. They were kids and they were happy. While I don't ship them, they were best friends, and their own kind of soulmates, I've never not believed that, it's too forking obvious. Gege practically shoves it down our throats and literally designed them to balance each other and be Messed Up Forever when they split. Every official art we see of the two of them practically has them as each other's reflections. I know, okay? I can't not know.
I just get really frustrated when Gojo's disregarded like that. He is his own person with his own beliefs who's made his own choices. They both are. And maybe it's dumb to get up in arms about a story that's not even real, but Gojo's a really imperfect person who struggles and suffers, and at the end of the day? He tries his best.
Even with all the power in the world, he's still only human. He can still only do so much. He's expected to be more than he is a lot of the time, and still he really tries. He wants to make the world better. He wants to make life better for the next generation. He has, in a way, given up on himself, but he's still going, because he knows his place in the world is still one that needs filling.
That's a narrative that means a lot to me. It's disheartening when it's misinterpreted because of the fun, silly, giggly side of his personality, or the reckless, careless, cocky side, both of which are wonderfully, excruciatingly human.
That's all.
#sorry for the rant#didnt mean to go up on my soapbox#i just saw an art and it really pushed the wrong button today#ive been very frustrated because a story im trying really hard to write because i really want to tell it is not going well at all#every word is like pulling teeth#so im sorry if this isnt a very encouraging post#i guess i just wanted to write one thing i knew i Could write#and like i said#that art really set me off#it was a lovely piece and im sure the creator worked very hard on it#im not trying to diss them#i just get frustrated because i think fandom as a whole kind of forgets a lot of what getou did and was planning to do and wanted to do#gojo cares so much about him so i think that makes the viewer also want to care about him and see the best in him#but gojo was also very well aware of getous flaws and sins#he let him go for ten years because he couldnt bear to chase him down himself#but when getou came he absolutely did not let him go after his students the people of tokyo and other sorcerers#we never see who or how many people did die during those ten years but we know his takeover of the star religious group was a hostile one#and we know his initial killings in the village#which included 112 people who didnt necessarily know about or approve of how nanako and himiko were being treated#'small town' this and 'everybody knows everything' that yes i know but do you know every little thing that goes on in your neighbors houses#no. and its safe to say there were most likely Other Children in that village#what made their lives worth less than nanako and himiko's?#how they were treated was Not Okay#but what getou did wasnt okay either#nor was what he continued to do okay#just. you know. the series literally talks about how getou had a choice. he could've come up with another way. a lot of other ways.#ways to improve and change jujutsu society. he was familiar with feeling marginalized and he saw what happened in that village so#why not search for unfound sorcerers who might be in similar situations even as teens or adults?#his cursed technique was perfect for it. curses that could do recon and find sorcerers and alert getou#so i just wish people would remember that sometimes. and not drag gojo into it. what do you think he was grieving for all that time?
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i just realized- 6 more months exactly until my birthday- that's... depressing- 😓
#tw: vent(ish?) in the tags#i still feel a year younger#i feel like i didnt do anything this year..-#😵💫#idk i need to find smt to feel good about and i feel so close to it...#i feel so close...#but it's just not in reach and idk what to do abt it#the things who make me who i am haven't changed for the past year#im still the kid who likes drawing bsd and music#the kid who everyone knows but doesn't have that many close friends#😮💨#mid-life crisis as a teen 🙌#dying in my twenties 🙌🙌#(/half joking)#i just wanna hug#but i dont really know how to ask for one#(pretty sure my mom would wonder what's wrong and my brother would look at me weird)#ik i should probably just start making healthy life choices but i cant be bothered#just three more months of school...#then a month off...#then half a month later im back in school to start it all over again...#i just wanna go Home#batrambles#batdiary#sorry this is so long and so weird(if you even made it this far)-
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AHATWHWTA!!!! IM SO CURIOUS. OH GOD IM CURIOUS. WILL DALE'S DEATH HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU KNOW....
FAIRIES?!!? im so not normal about this fic. hello!! ectobiologistz from AO3 here :D
Hehe HAHAHAHAH Oh, wouldn't you like to know? (Well, of course, else you wouldn't ask)
Heheh, I can tell again It will be long till we come to that point Heh, though, that doesn't mean kindness will come his way Who knows, maybe he too will live in dismay?
HAH! As if the universe would be so kind, as to let him keep his mind, his body and all things intact. Oh, dear oh my, maybe he'll even wish he would die?
But alas, such wishes goes against the rules And, as we know, Peri is no rulebreaker
If he wants to be happy He better go with the flow For, if he doesn't…
Well, who will know?
So, let my answer be clear No one is happy hear And the worst you can see Is where we want to be
In other words, what would hurt the most?
Also, THANK YOU!!! It delights me so that there is more you want to know!
Hi!!! You're great!! You're really been brightening my days with the words you've sent my way! Thank you for being the wonder that you are!
I hope the joy you greet me with and the kindness you share, will come to you ten fold and free you from any despair!
Hope it will let the sun shine on through Giving you bright wonder in all that you do!
Hihih, and I'm so glad you like the fic! Thank you!!
#Hihi! Oh‚ there are so many fun things I'm sure you'd like to know#And that makes me so happy#It delights me so#And it's fun to see you have no idea where this will go#oh goodness#I got an ask!#Thank you!#A little ask in my valley of despair#fop What It takes Ask#fop What It takes#dale fairly oddparents#fop dale#dale dimmadome#dale fop#Might be good to ask#What was the first mistake#That got everything onto this path#What choice was made that lead them all here?#Well‚ being wrong is a fuel for fear#So there are no answers‚ nothing can be clear#Just mud in the water that they're all bound to drink#And the more they drink#The further they'll sink#No one would dare to be wrong#That's the only thing going on
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