#i literally was doing fine
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crazy how 4 hours of work will literally take up my entire 15+ hour day. who allowed this
#text#i have Things to Do tomorrow but i also have Work and it feels impossible to do both#even though mathematically i should be literally fine
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#i genuinely feel sick lmao#like wtf am i supposed to do now#im living with my parents and ive been told TO MY FACE that im too much to handle#which is like yes ok obviously i already knew that#but there is a HUGE difference btwn knowing that and being told it#like god#i just wish that they had told me earlier that it was too much#instead of waiting until they decided i was in a crisis and needed immediate intervention#like why couldnt this wait until next week#why am i suddenly in immediate danger#i literally was doing fine#like not fine#but they could have just told me that they cant handle me and left#like they didnt have to do all that extra shit like ik im needy but u only have to tell me once if u dont want me to contact you#i feel fucking disgusting#cant even fucking live on my own lmfao#istg every time i make new friends i do it worse#why is it that nobody gives a shit until suddenly theyre terrified for me#why cant i just have someone care a normal amount about my wellbeing#why can you stage a whole fucking intervention but u cant just hang out for a little while sometimes#i should literally just stop trying atp like i just fuck everything up worse
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Abby and Into the pit Oswald have similar “friends”..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf movie#abby schmidt#golden freddy#spring bonnie#fnaf oswald#pit bonnie#into the pit#ITS FUNNY and interesting to me#that Oswald and Abby had similar scenarios happen to em#I will say Abby definitely had the better end of the stick BAHAH#LIKE YEAH golden Freddy did try to trick her#but he didn’t actually hurt her#and she seem fine to do see the animatronics anyway despite the violence#WHILE OSWALD is stuck with pit Bonnie#a dude who literally tries to kill him ever moment he gets#but also is trying to be his dad#it’s complicated and Oswald is NOT having any of it#hey at least pit Bonnie is having a good time
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Kenji and his cow Hanako II were the best duo from wan change my mind
#GUYS ITS OKAY HE’S WITH HIS COW FRIENDS HE’S FINE#I present this after the abomination we all witnessed from ch. 118#sigh yeah I know the chapter released literally a whole ass month ago but I’ve been too busy with school to draw anything#take this as a manifestation for his return in the next ch#Seriously though I’m like 80% sure Kenji and the others are coming back asagiri can’t do this to us#idk maybe I’m being delusional#tbh I’m probably gonna disappear for a bit until my end of year exams are done so if anyone notices me on tumblr please yell at me to study#pls pls pls#btw I was watching moo deng live cams while drawing this she’s such an icon#bsd#bsd art#bsd fanart#bungo stray dogs#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs fanart#bsd kenji#kenji miyazawa#kenji bsd#bsd wan#cows#cow art#my art#digital art#artists on tumblr
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on a completely separate note; shizun luo binghe with a disciple shen yuan who fell into the abyss??? *thinks about LBH canonically stealing SQQ's corpse for 5 years* he'd hallucinate i think. like, like visual and audial hallucinations.
Keeps thinking he's seeing SQQ in the corner of his eyes, or wandering between the trees, amongst a group of disciples. Thinks he hears him calling for him, but its just the wind or another disciple.
Gets Xiu Ya reforged but patently fucking refuses to make a sword mound. Because his disciple Is Not Dead :))) There was No Body. He's Not Dead. And If You keep Insisting That He Is, He's Gonna Skewer You :). He's holding onto Xiu Ya so he can return his most favored disciple's sword when he returns. It's on his hip right next to Zheng Yang where it's supposed to be.
Also this motherfucker?? does not sleep btw. He has the image of SQQ, wide eyed and hysterical and standing at the mouth of the abyss burned into his fucking eyelids. Can't use the dreamscape to escape it either because he keeps trying to save him and either he does and it's an incredibly cruel trick to wake up to, or he doesn't and he gets his heart broken in several different pieces again.
There is no convincing this man that Shen Qingqiu is dead. Absolutely nothing at all. He is buried so deep in denial that moles would be jealous of how deep he is. He keeps making tea for two in the bamboo house only to remember that it's just him. SQQ's fans are hiding everywhere, little reminders of his presence. He goes to wake up SQQ on the mornings he sleeps in-- only to find the room empty.
#svsss#luo binghe#svsss au#scum villain#scum villian self saving system#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#disciple shen yuan#lbh. visibly exhausted and with twitchy eyes: im fine :) | everyone else: ho no the fuck you ARENT.#SQQ was hysterical not because he found out LBH was half-demon but bc he was having a long-awaited mental breakdown over his autonomy :)#or (limited) lack thereof. he was having a sudden onset crisis of mortality and was handling at quite literally the WORST time. oops#im thinking very hard that LBH would never push his disciple into the abyss especially with no system to force him to. so SQQ either#had to goad him into it (failing always) or throw himself in. he ended up doing it himself but not before some very impressive hysterics.#BUT ALSO. IF THIS HAD BEEN WHERE SQQ WAS THE HALF-HEAVENLY DEMON INSTEAD IT WOULD'VE BEEN SO GREAT.#and by great i mean horribly angsty bc SQQ is NOT doing too hot and has. in very SY-like fashion. convinced himself that LBH will kill him#when he finds out he's a demon. so when it comes out i have this mental image of him lunging at LBH and LBH flinches back. but SQQ wraps hi#hands around the blade of Zheng Yang and yanks it up so the tip of the blade is digging into his chest where is heart is. LBH can't yank th#sword away without risking slicing into SQQ's hands. SQQ's hair has fallen out of its tail/bun and is now messily spilling down his#back and its NO helping the kinda deranged look he has going on. he's visibly shaking and his eyes keep flittering away and back at LBH's#face. SQQ is looking at the messages from the system warning him that he has to go into the abyss or punishment will occur. he's like.#rambling though. talking about how shizun doesn't *like* unclean things and there is nothing more unclean than a demon. like he is#INSISTING. LBH can't?? get a fucking word in. actually. SY isn't listening that much either anyways. too overwhelmed with the system and#the amount of stress he's under and his crumbling mental state and the innate and primal desire to live even when he's standing in front of#his own executioner. it all ends with him sitting on the ground at the lip of the abyss with his hair falling in his face. he looks so#unkempt and fallen apart and so distinctly *non-Shen Qingqiu* that LBH feels physically ill over it. tears are streaming down SQQ's face#and despite everything he is smiling. its not a nice smile. its a very frayed falling apart at the seams about to crack smile.#he tells shizun not to worry about staining his blade with this disciple's filthy blood because this disciple will take care of it himself.#and then he falls into the abyss before luo binghe can so much as grab him. the only reason LBh doesn't literally jump in after him is bc#he was numb with shock and the abyss was already closed before he could feel his legs again :]
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I got my hair cut the other day and of course I had to draw the dca boys running a hair salon:
Sun would be so effortlessly charming. Always chatting away with customers, explaining each product he uses and how to best maintain and style their hair.
Moon I can see being popular with the less chattier customers (like me) but over time they begin to open up. I imagine he hums while working. Otherwise, he's all ears for the newest gossip.
(The clipped up hat idea came from @bamsara's solar lunacy doodles!)
Also I love the popular headcanon that the dca can speak other languages, so I can imagine them being a hit with the aunties.
The full sketch page under cut! And some of my other thoughts
Other thoughts about this... AU? Can I call it an AU? Feels kinda small for an AU, but whatever:
Eclipse works there too! Haven't decided if it would be canon or fanon Eclipse, though I really like the image of 4-armed Eclipse working on 2 clients at once (plus, the nickname Clip is perfect for this scenario)
of course they're great with kids! They'd be able to console kids that get scared of getting their hair cut. Sun would do a little trick and tell them how good and brave they are all the way through. Moon would console them and hum a soothing song (or hey maybe they notice the kid's wearing a disney shirt and starts humming some showtunes). Every kid gets a candydrop and a balloon on their way out.
y/n works at the hair salon as a part-timer and does tasks around the salon like sweeping, arranging bookings, washing hair, etc. They don't really care too much about their own hair, but the boys are always offering to style it, dye it, braid it. With y/n's permission, the boys always toy with their hair—patting it, combing their hands through it, brushing it over y/n's ear, ruffling it.
#fnaf sun#fnaf moon#fnaf dca#dca fandom#this idea has been running rampant in my brain while I've been trying to focus on my modules these past few days#I can't take any credit for their outfits tho these were literally just what the hairdressers at my local salon we wearing that day#this all started because my hairdresser was wearing a delightfully yellow sweater#and just ohmygosh hairdresser sunny popped into my mind#this was also an experimentation with colouring with markers#need more colouring practice especially with shading#also learned the hard way that none of my fineliners are waterproof#or at least they don't play well with my markers! they seem to work with my watercolour paints just fine#sighhhhhh#crab art#New Do Same You AU
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[ID in alt]
Some Papyruses :]
+ spreading my papyrus can float propaganda.
#theres another one i did that i like but ill prolly do that in another post#for now have some assorted doodles of him :D#fun fact originally these were grayscale but the ai shield that i use didnt fucking like that ig so i put a red overlay on it#and then it was fine so#i also like the red more so it worked out ig#also papyrus can float/fly and NO ONE TALKS ABOUT IT#LIKE EVERYONE ALWAYS TALKS ABOUT SANS' WEIRD SHIT#but what about PAPYRUS???#he literally just fucks off through the air after your fight and no one mentions it again???#like HELLO????#sunn art#dont repost#undertale#papyrus#fanart#artists on tumblr
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i feel like people are sleeping on the occam's razor situation of how buckwild it is to outright accuse a guy of being a clone of your friend even if you DO have a lot of circumstantial evidence. there's other options is what im saying. they could just be like. a guy. that's a sensible deduction. you should explore that deduction. ignore my shirt that reads I <3 RED HERRINGS.
i still think odile has the correct theory on lock but she's smart enough to know it needs like... a real smoking gun to be able to bring it up without sounding insane.
anyway. (mirabelle voice) i know its rude to speculate but has anyone else noticed the grieving? they seem to be grieving. does anyone have any thoughts on the grieving? i have some thoughts on the grieving.
#[isabeau voice] am i insane or does sometimes loop talk like they might have killed their whole family. is that just me? just checking.#nille design highly inspired by @kiwibrain's since its the one that imprinted in my mind. liberties taken since i didnt look @ reference#anyway i have a lot more thoughts on this? i guess ill hide them in the tags...? scroll down i suppose.#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#isat act 6 spoilers#isat loop#isat siffrin#isat bonnie#isat nille#isat fanart#in stars and time fanart#doodlebyte#----------------------------------------------------------------------#anyway the extra thoughts. are literally just my general thoughts on postcanon. (and thus are the context for all of my postcanon doodles!)#which is i think nille joins the party before loop reappears for a start (either from a period of nonexistence or just wandering around)#and that like. i think the party should be able to integrate loop as a completely new person. because they are! the secrecy isn't great but#They and Siffrin shuffle into different ecological niches in the party (eg. i think sif is more squeamish after it all but loop isnt)#and while it's not *exactly* what Loop wanted they get that beggars can't be choosers. and its pretty good#(i am glossing over how i think loop's reappearence drags both them and siffrin into a massive behavioural backslide and is likely a bit#distressing to watch go down. cycle of argument -> lovebombing -> normalcy -> repeat. etc etc. but since they are no longer literally#stewing in the worst pressure cooker of all time they do resolve it via productive conversation on their own time. its fine)#the party well-meaningly tries to deduce things from loop's vagueries and are able to pin down the DEAD FAMILY vibe pretty quickly.#but eventually the question of their prior identity falls by the wayside because well! they're just their friend loop! (also change belief)#as for how The Truth Come Out... this is what i mean by The Isabeau Torment Nexus(tm). which is that i think... isiloop should almost occur#BEFORE isabeau knows who loop is. he's just genuinely charmed by them eventually and tries to close the open end of the polycule#which FREAKS LOOP THE FUCK OUT because thats just too genuinely sick and wrong. and obviously w emotions high its not a great confrontation#ANYWAY told u i had more thoughts. if i were normal itd be a text post but.
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hey idk which anxious pre-t babe needs to hear this but i didn't get to when i was younger so. testosterone will not make you ugly. it won't make you a horrible person. it won't 'mutilate' or ruin your body. if you want to go on testosterone then literally all that happens is it makes you really fucking hot and REALLY fucking happy.
#ramble#literally very hot. like very hot#there is so much sweat#'oh you're just trying to paint a pretty picture that it's all fine' yeah i am!!! it's fucking great. i love it#trans people aren't sad clueless little babes who don't know what's going on. if you want to go on hormones you Know what it's going to do#and you WANT THAT WHICH IS WHY YOU'RE DOING IT#i hate hate hate seeing detransitioners like 'it destroyed and mutilated me'#*proceeds to list the normal effects of hormones*#it's all fearmongering and it's SICK#personally i think we should start glorifying transition more. because it's BEAUTIFUL
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Link is Hylia's specialist little boy (this is not a good thing for him)
(stills under the cut)
#screw you tumblr gif size limit btw. i had to compress it to get it to work but its fine. luckily its not super detailed.#next time i do something like this im doing pixel art. tiny canvas. this was a lot of fun though :)#my art#the legend of zelda#loz#link loz#artists on tumblr#gif warning#legend of zelda#tloz#tloz fanart#wind waker#loz fanart#twilight princess#a link to the past#botw#breath of the wild#ocarina of time#skyward sword#had a lot of fun designing hylia btw <3 took ideas from skyward sword game + manga and also the goddess statues from both botw and ss#need to make designs of the golden goddesses next....#color picked a lot of the colors and then adjusted them but. all of the games are so saturated except for twilight princess it is so funny.#it literally looked like he was in black and white compared to them.#sorry to the links that i did not draw. i was not drawing any more than i had to. 8 was already a lot this took me forever#(two weeks. not that long actually but long enough)
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Prompt 100
“What are you, a Kent?”
It’s a saying in the world of the supernatural. A well-known one even. See, several, many generations back, no one quite knows when, the Kent family managed to run afoul of a particularly nasty creature who laid a curse upon them. The original wording, no one quite knows either, but the gist, everyone is aware of. For no firstborns will be born to them before they already have one.
It was supposed to be airtight in a way, a curse that would end the entire bloodline really. For a child to exist before they could have a child? How could that be?
Well. That curse had… backfired. It had backfired massively. Most, at least back when blood was everything, didn’t exactly ponder things like adoption to those outside of their own bloodline. The Kents however, lived in a very simple village, one that had disease spread through it often back then, leaving families childless and children parentless.
What were they to do but take them in? And so they had a son, many sons and daughters even, before their firstborn. Now of course, most would simply dismiss it afterwards. After all, that was the end of the story, isn’t it?
Well, no. See, the curse was a family-line curse, a just in case perhaps, that meant that each generation could not have any children until they had children. Perhaps it should have ended there, but well. It didn’t.
Kents are a strange breed in the world of the supernatural, known for having a… bit of an adoption problem. If any child or babe were to be left near their land, one can be assured the family line would take them in as their own.
Fae, demon, human, changeling, satyr, cyclops, half-breeds, werewolf- it didn’t matter. A Kent would gladly pick the child up and raise it as their own. And now, they could add aliens to that long, long list in the family line.
And really, perhaps with this context, is it really surprising that when one Clark Kent, said alien, opens his door to a basket on his doorstep holding a trio of godlings, he takes them in with no questions asked?
#dcxdp#dpxdc#prompts#superman#clark kent#sam manson#tucker foley#danny fenton#The kents didn't bat an eye at getting an alien kid#Pa might be human but his uncle was a literal angel & his aunt was a dullahan#ma kent got the rundown when the relationship got serious#she is completely fine with this#This is the woman who got Clark an “I believe” alien shirt#she is down to parent this alien baby#“Ma I found a three-for-one do you and Pa want to meet your new grandbabies”#“Bruce I need to know if you have baby supplies- No I didn't kidnap a baby I should be asking you that-”#“Since when did you have kids Smallville-”#“Since 3 this morning :)”#Clark with his 3 toddlers at home seeing Connor for the first time: GASP#Clark: Another baby!#Connor: I've technically been artificially aged up-#Clark already holding him: Baby!#100 prompts woo
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nighttime routine in an au where the marauder’s map has pinch zoom
#iPad baby Harry potter#parasocial drarry#imagining him hard tapping this dumb piece of paper at breakfast#dw after this I took his glasses off for him and put them on the nightstand#why yes I did use a Tokyo mew mew screenshot as a pose ref#I literally can’t stop thinking abt blorbo from her tumor#harry potter#draco malfoy#drarry#draco x harry#harry x draco#hp fanart#hpdm#harco#one day I will make a real drawing that I spend real time on again#lately all I can do is doodle#which is fine i just#miss thinking ideas are worth effort or#effort pays off or whatevs#but I’m glad to be posting instead of adding to the wip graveyard#finishing doodles is better than hoarding drawings#I never end up going back lo#*lol#talking 2 myself here
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my ideal timkon don't get together until they've both already done some queer realizations and dated other guys a little bit, in part because on tim's end, i think he's been in love with kon since he was 17, but at 17 tim didn't even know he was bisexual, forget anything else. and his feelings for kon were so big but also so constant that he didn't even realize they were there or significant because they've always been there and been huge. for years. so he putters along and does his time in the torment nexus (the closet) and languishes a bit but slowly starts to figure it out.
meanwhile kon dates someone, mostly like omg im dating a guy this is ALLOWED !??!?! and its pretty lowkey and casual and doesnt last bc like . super identity issues, right. kon would Never just tell someone, but secrets and casual relationships dont last long etc etc. but just the entire principle of kon dating someone and then being like yeah idk im not really feeling it like hes nice and all but i think hes more interested in like… yknow, my hot bod, than me. its whatever tho. and tim just being SOOOOO mad that someone would date kon and not absolutely adore him. tim will not be unpacking why hes so mad about kon having a shitty boyfriend. obviously its just bc kons his bestie and deserves better. (😶)
so he's just grouchily tinkering on some upgrade for his car to get the grumpy energies out. like WHATEVER! (angrily turns socket wrench) he's not saying kon should dump the guy or anything (angrily turns socket wrench) but he's just SAYING, kon can do BETTER!!!!! (angrily turns socket wrench) and kon DESERVES better!!! kon deserves someone who will treat him RIGHT!!!!! (angrily turns socket wrench) like if TIM was gonna fuck kon he wouldn't do it like a goddamn quickie and just fucking leave (angrily grabs the next size socket and scoots further under the car) like kon OBVIOUSLY doesn't like that so why won't this guy GET THAT!!!! (angry tinkering noises) if he's that shallow he can go find himself a sexy body pillow to screw!!! leave kon alone!!!!
and cassie sitting on a chair nearby is just like. sorry what was that? "if i was gonna fuck kon"? did you just say--hey tim? hey. can you go back a step?
and tim's just. obviously this is a hypothetical everyone considers about kon. look at him he's . you know. besides, tim's just talking as his best friend who wants the best for him! ugh stop trying to read into it cassie, that's not the POINT--
#rimi talks#cassie: only one of us HAS fucked kon and yet somehow *i'm* not the one who's ever started a sentence with ''if i was gonna fuck kon''.#like i'm just saying tim. i HAVE fucked kon. and i have Never Once said those words in that order. fascinating huh?#tim (rolling out from under his car to give her the most withering look imaginable): oh so you're saying you think that's fine then?#like you Wouldn't do better than this guy?#cassie: literally not at all what i'm saying but also DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF--#the narrator: tim would not admit he's bisexual for another 5 months.#a few days later dick finds him on a rooftop brooding so so so hard and goes yeah bud??#and tim with the most thousand yard stare in the world is like. i think cassie was right about something. but i'm not telling you what#timkon#its important to me that tim is kind of stupid. you get that right#he's stupid and cassie is his bestie who means the world to him and also IS going to point and laugh at him for this for the next 4 years#tim#kon#cassie
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do yall ever think about bruce/batman!clone danny standing in front of his bathroom mirror after finding out he was a clone and silently tracing his face. The slope of his jaw and point of his chin. The high angle of his cheekbones and the shape of his eyes, the curve of his brow bones and the shape of his nose. The volume of his hair and the way it curls and gets fluffy when it gets too long.
His hair is black the same way a crow's wing is black. His dad's hair is black the same way a black bear's fur is black. His dad's eyes are blue like the ocean is blue. Danny's eyes are blue the same way a glacier is blue.
His dad has a square jaw and straight flat hair, and he tans and gets a face full of freckles when he's out in the sun for too long. Danny burns like a lobster and his face remains untouched. Danny has a sharp jaw and tall cheekbones, and Sam says when he's not smiling there's almost something regal about him. You would never call Jack Fenton "regal" when he's not smiling.
Sam says when he's not smiling he looks scary the same way a stone statue is. Jack Fenton when he's not smiling looks scary the same way that german shepherd staring at you across the street is.
Do you ever think he grew up wondering if he was adopted. Because of course, he has black hair and blue eyes like his dad. But having the same color doesn't make you someone's child.
Or, worse, things he's heard from the other kids and the other parents and even some of his teachers growing up; that he was the product of an affair. And that his dad was just too stupid to notice. And Danny would defend his parents until the day he died, because Jack Fenton wasn't an idiot and Maddie Fenton wasn't a cheater.
But doubt comes in with fickle tongue. his parents swear up and down that he is their child when he asks about either. That Danny just had his grandparents' features, but he was their son and they loved him.
But Danny doesn't look like either of his parents. His mom's eyes are blue like an aquamarine and Jazz's too. And they burn like lobsters in the sun too, but Jazz gets freckles on her face and so does Maddie. And as Danny grows up he doesn't bulk up or get stocky like his dad did, and when he hits puberty he doesn't shoot up like a tree like Jack Fenton did.
He stays small, and they say he's a late bloomer (and he is), or that he just has his mom's height. But he's fast and has good stamina, and some days it feels like he's built entirely different from his family. That the things they went through growing up just didn't apply to him. Jack and Maddie Fenton both had acne and breakouts when they hit puberty, and Jazz inherits it and he's seen the amount of skincare products she keeps on her side of the bathroom.
And then he hits puberty and breaks out maybe once or twice, but his skin stays clear for the most part and the problems and changes his dad went through just don't happen to him.
And the truth is worse than all of the lies.
How horrifying.
#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#danny fenton is a clone#clone danny fenton#clone danny#thinking about the inherent trauma that comes with growing up as a clone and not knowing and questioning everything about yourself#thinking about the amount of effort and lying that Jack and Maddie would've had to to do if they wanted to pass Danny off as their bio son#the MEDICAL RECORDS#danny's medical history is completely different from theirs. any generational health problems the waynes have would/could be passed down to#danny and he's completely oblivious to it up until the reveal. he'd have no idea about any medical risks until they hit him before that.#so many little things and inconsistencies that would just build and build and build until it finally came to a head and the truth came out#forever and ever and ever fascinated by the underlying horror of being a clone. there's a horror in being cloned but there's also a horror#in BEING a clone. like yes he could've always known from the start and that comes with its own set of issues BUT. just. him not knowing#for the longest time. the lies and deceit and betrayal. you know how adopted kids come out and talk about how they didn't know they were#adopted for the longest time and how traumatizing and betrayed they felt when they're finally told 15-20 years down the line? yeah that#i imagine finding out you're a clone is a lot like that.#i read a book in middle school once abt a girl moving to a new town with her family and getting these horrible nightmares and noticing how#everyone was acting strange around her. one of her nightmares was about the 30yo police officer being a shambling corpse talking to her#and at the end of the book she finds out she's actually the clone of a dead older sister and the police officer was her sister's boyfriend.#and she was in gymnastics but quit and her parents were so disappointed bc the og sister was a champion/award winning gymnastics player#and i never did finish the book but god am i reminded of that.#i love reading the dpxdc clone danny posts and they usually have him brush off being a clone which is literally totally fine but duUUDE#just imagine his own horror over it. its SOOO good
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linktober day 23: children
kokiri kids :)
#*guy who didnt look at the prompt directly after this one voice* oh i know exactly what to do for this prompt!#guy who also literally already has a zelink kid design. whatever its fine#linktober#linktober 2023#skribbles#oot#ocarina of time#loz#legend of zelda
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Very interesting to me that a certain subset of the BES fandom's favourite iterations of Mizu and Akemi are seemingly rooted in the facades they have projected towards the world, and are not accurate representations of their true selves.
And I see this is especially the case with Mizu, where fanon likes to paint her as this dominant, hyper-masculine, smirking Cool GuyTM who's going to give you her strap. And this idea of Mizu is often based on the image of her wearing her glasses, and optionally, with her cloak and big, wide-brimmed kasa.
And what's interesting about this, to me, is that fanon is seemingly falling for her deliberate disguise. Because the glasses (with the optional combination of cloak and hat) represent Mizu's suppression of her true self. She is playing a role.
Take this scene of Mizu in the brothel in Episode 4 for example. Here, not only is Mizu wearing her glasses to symbolise the mask she is wearing, but she is purposely acting like some suave and cocky gentleman, intimidating, calm, in control. Her voice is even deeper than usual, like what we hear in her first scene while facing off with Hachiman the Flesh-Trader in Episode 1.
This act that Mizu puts on is an embodiment of masculine showboating, which is highly effective against weak and insecure men like Hachi, but also against women like those who tried to seduce her at the Shindo House.
And that brings me to how Mizu's mask is actually a direct parallel to Akemi's mask in this very same scene.
Here, Akemi is also putting up an act, playing up her naivety and demure girlishness, using her high-pitched lilted voice, complimenting Mizu and trying to make small talk, all so she can seduce and lure Mizu in to drink the drugged cup of sake.
So what I find so interesting and funny about this scene, characters within it, and the subsequent fandom interpretations of both, is that everyone seems to literally be falling for the mask that Mizu and Akemi are putting up to conceal their identities, guard themselves from the world, and get what they want.
It's also a little frustrating because the fanon seems to twist what actually makes Mizu and Akemi's dynamic so interesting by flattening it completely. Because both here and throughout the story, Mizu and Akemi's entire relationship and treatment of each other is solely built off of masks, assumptions, and misconceptions.
Akemi believes Mizu is a selfish, cocky male samurai who destroyed her ex-fiance's career and life, and who abandoned her to let her get dragged away by her father's guards and forcibly married off to a man she didn't know. on the other hand, Mizu believes Akemi is bratty, naive princess who constantly needs saving and who can't make her own decisions.
These misconceptions are even evident in the framing of their first impressions of each other, both of which unfold in these slow-motion POV shots.
Mizu's first impression of Akemi is that of a beautiful, untouchable princess in a cage. Swirling string music in the background.
Akemi's first impression of Mizu is of a mysterious, stoic "demon" samurai who stole her fiance's scarf. Tense music and the sound of ocean waves in the background.
And then, going back to that scene of them together in Episode 4, both Mizu and Akemi continue to fool each other and hold these assumptions of each other, and they both feed into it, as both are purposely acting within the suppressive roles society binds them to in order to achieve their goals within the means they are allowed (Akemi playing the part of a subservient woman; Mizu playing the part of a dominant man).
But then, for once in both their lives, neither of their usual tactics work.
Akemi is trying to use flattery and seduction on Mizu, but Mizu sees right through it, knowing that Akemi is just trying to manipulate and harm her. Rather than give in to Akemi's tactics, Mizu plays with Akemi's emotions by alluding to Taigen's death, before pinning her down, and then when she starts crying, Mizu just rolls her eyes and tells her to shut up.
On the opposite end, when Mizu tries to use brute force and intimidation, Akemi also sees right through it, not falling for it, and instead says this:
"Under your mask, you're not the killer you pretend to be."
Nonetheless, despite the fact that they see a little bit through each other's masks, they both still hold their presumptions of each other until the very end of the season, with Akemi seeing Mizu as an obnoxious samurai swooping in to save the day, and Mizu seeing Akemi as a damsel in distress.
And what I find a bit irksome is that the fandom also resorts to flattening them to these tropes as well.
Because Mizu is not some cool, smooth-talking samurai with a big dick sword as Akemi (and the fandom) might believe. All of that is the facade she puts up and nothing more. In reality, Mizu is an angry, confused and lonely child, and a masterful artist, who is struggling against her own self-hatred. Master Eiji, her father figure who knows her best, knows this.
And Akemi, on the other hand, is not some girly, sweet, vain and spoiled princess as Mizu might believe. Instead she has never cared for frivolous things like fashion, love or looks, instead favouring poetry and strategy games instead, and has always only cared about her own independence. Seki, her father figure who knows her best, knows this.
But neither is she some authoritative dominatrix, though this is part of her new persona that she is trying to project to get what she wants. Because while Akemi is willful, outspoken, intelligent and authoritative, she can still be naive! She is still often unsure and needs to have her hand held through things, as she is still learning and growing into her full potential. Her new parental/guardian figure, Madame Kaji, knows this as well.
So with all that being said, now that we know that Mizu and Akemi are essentially wearing masks and putting up fronts throughout the show, what would a representation of Mizu's and Akemi's true selves actually look like? Easy. It's in their hair.
This shot on the left is the only time we see Mizu with her hair completely down. In this scene, she's being berated by Mama, and her guard is completely down, she has no weapon, and is no longer wearing any mask, as this is after she showed Mikio "all of herself" and tried to take off the mask of a subservient housewife. Thus, here, she is sad, vulnerable, and feeling small (emphasised further by the framing of the scene). This is a perfect encapsulation of what Mizu is on the inside, underneath all the layers of revenge-obsession and the walls she's put around herself.
In contrast, the only time we Akemi with her hair fully down, she is completely alone in the bath, and this scene takes place after being scorned by her father and left weeping at his feet. But despite all that, Akemi is headstrong, determined, taking the reigns of her life as she makes the choice to run away, but even that choice is reflective of her youthful naivety. She even gets scolded by Seki shortly after this in the next scene, because though she wants to be independent, she still hasn't completely learned to be. Not yet. Regardless, her decisiveness and moment of self-empowerment is emphasised by the framing of the scene, where her face takes up the majority of the shot, and she stares seriously into the middle distance.
To conclude, I wish popular fanon would stop mischaracterising these two, and flattening them into tropes and stereotypes (ie. masculine badass swordsman Mizu and feminine alluring queen but also girly swooning damsel Akemi), all of which just seems... reductive. It also irks me when Akemi is merely upheld as a love interest and romantic device for Mizu and nothing more, when she is literally Mizu's narrative foil (takes far more narrative precedence over romantic interest) and the deuteragonist of this show. She is her own person. That is literally the theme of her entire character and arc.
#blue eye samurai#mizu blue eye samurai#akemi blue eye samurai#blue eye samurai meta#just in case... im gonna tag this as#mizukemicritical#akemizucritical#though this post isnt actually criticising the ship itself but rather fanon's portrayal of the ship and the characters#for that reason lemme also tag this as#wank.mp3#feel free to disagree of course but please be civil#and if you need to rant about how wrong i am without any convincing evidence kindly feel free to make your own post. peace and love <3#fandom.rtf#meta dissertations.pdf#shut up haydar#edit: for full disclosure. i do rather dislike this ship. but obviously it's fine for anyone to enjoy it. please do! have your fun!#it's just that as usual! popular fanon and fandom around a ship is what has completely deterred me from any sense of enjoyment of it#it's a shame too because i was very open and even eager for some mizu/akemi romance in the future#but out-of-character fanon + the rudeness of certain fans has definitely soured it for me#but that doesn't mean people can't enjoy it obviously! ship and let ship!!!#plus it has its appeal which i DO STILL see and enjoy!!!!#i would even go as far as to call them soulmates because their narratives and characters are LITERALLY intertwined!!!#but. yeah. my gradual distaste for this ship is indeed very unfortunate.
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