#i imagine angel would get aggressive when he feels weird

[brewstersbru]

Uh-oh have some more; i have a problem ! Huskerdust pt. 2 🕸️❤️‍🩹

It’s stupid. Really, it’s fucking insane, nonsensical, and the worst goddamn idea Angel’s had since he sold his soul. Still, though, he can’t stop humming the song.

“I’m a loser, baby…” He sings to himself, curled around Nug as he stares out his window into the neon lights and building fires that ever burn throughout the city. One thing he likes about the hotel- aside from actually having people who care about what happens to him, and a safe (and free!) place to sleep- is that he can’t see Val’s from his room's window. He can fall asleep without his sword hanging over his neck, without the constant reminder of what he’s allowed himself to become.

Before tonight, before Husk’s surprisingly uplifting little song and dance number, Angel hated most of what he was. Yeah he likes sex, but he doesn’t like being a whore. Doesn’t like being Val’s whore, especially. 

And it didn’t make anything better, not really. Not in any way that matters. But it was nice to smile at Husk and not be expected to put out for it. To dance and sing without a leash, and instead gentle fleeting touches to guide him through the steps.

Angel curls further into himself, Nug makes a soft squealing noise at the jostling. 

Husk was so careful with him. They were on the side of the goddamn street, next to a puddle of bum-puke (which Husk had prevented from getting on him!!) and Husk chose to be kind with Angel. What an idiot. What a gentleman.

They’d never work out, Angel has to remind himself of that when a shiver of a feeling he’d thought had long been fucked or beaten out of him by now works its way through his body. Warm and sugary. 

Both beholden to contracts they’d signed, pets to egotistic psychopaths entirely too eager to make them suffer. What now feels so comforting could very quickly turn into something agonizing and painful. Plus, Husk doesn’t want him. He’s made that abundantly clear by now. Sure he’s being nice now that Angel’s ‘respecting his boundaries’ or whatever but the boundaries are there for a reason. He doesn’t want Angel. So much that it makes him uncomfortable if he gets too close.  

Angel can feel his eyelids getting heavy, but there’s a jittering in his chest that signals a rough night. Shit, even with a night as good as this one, he can’t sleep in peace? 

He’s a loser. Damaged goods. Maybe he’s not alone, but fuck if he doesn’t feel it right now. 

Nug wriggles out from the lax cage of his arms and jumps off the bed. 

***

There are texts from Val waiting on Angel’s phone when he wakes up. 

He was right, it was a rough night. Only managed a cool three hours of fitful tossing before his alarm rang for the hotel’s ‘daily activities’. Say what you will about him, he’s nothing if not punctual (and Charlie had looked real pitiful when she asked him to come down in the mornings more, it’s really impossible to say no to her face). 

The texts are a long eternity of scrolling pink. Angel sighs at the few words he manages to catch as he makes his way to the top, “whore” (unoriginal), “bitch” (overdone), “ungrateful” (points for accuracy), and a whole myriad of other demeaning things that his exhaustion addled mind can’t be assed to fully compartmentalize.

He didn’t know how much he’d miss being called “baby” in that smooth low baritone until now; being called all the regular stuff makes his stomach churn in comparison. Or maybe it’s just who’s calling him what. He’d let Husk call him whatever he wanted if he kept being all gentle with him. Shit, it hasn’t even been a day and he’s already mooning like a whiny romance protagonist. Eugh. 

Looks like he’s got another long shoot today. He’s expected over in an hour or so, and Val had signed off with an “xoxo” which really means “or else”. God, he’s really punishing him for stepping out of line this time. Angel can feel a twinge of something in his back as he stands from his bed. Even with an enhanced body, fourteen hours nonstop took it’s toll, and it’s just going to get worse from here. He winces to himself and moves to rub at the sore spot. “Fuck.” He mutters, casting around for a decently sexy outfit so Val doesn’t have another thing to nitpick about. 

It doesn’t take long, after the first several years of coming home sticky and itchy Angel had curated his closet to be both sexy and comfortable. Every piece strikes that balance perfectly and nothing clashes when combined. He’s quite proud of it actually, but it’s not something that comes up often in conversation so he doesn’t really ever have the occasion to brag. 

Husk is- as he always is- shining glasses behind the bar when Angel makes his way down. One has to wonder if the dishes he’s cleaning are actually dirty, or if he just needs something to do with his hands. Angel would put a lot of money on the latter, no one here- even with all the alcoholics- could possibly go through glasses that fast. 

Husk’s eyes dart up to his when the stairs let out a sharp creak, announcing his presence. With a small, private smile he waves him over.

“Mornin’ Angel. Fancy a drink?”

It’s really pathetic how much Angel has to fight to not give in. Not to walk over and settle at the bar, letting that warm, even voice soothe all his decades old aches and pains. He smiles, but it’s tight and untrue. Husk glances down at his lips for a moment, frowns, then goes back to shining.

“Sorry, Kitty, got a shoot. Raincheck?” He hopes he says yes. What he would give to be able to see Husk at the end of the- long, painful and entirely exhausting- day and share a drink. He’s never been to heaven, never even tried thinking about what might be up there because, well, look at him. It’s not really his kind of place, is it?

Still, though, a drink with Husk at the end of today’s misery has got to be pretty damn close. As close as Angel can ever hope to get, anyways. Husk sets the newly polished glass down, and leans against the countertop.

“Sure thing. I’ll have a cosmo waiting.” Angel can tell he wants to ask, that he wants to say something about Val and the fact that this is the second day in a row Angel is going in for a long shoot. About the bruises that are still visible, having just started purpling against Angel’s skin. But he doesn’t, he bites his tongue and offers what solace he can. The feeling that bubbles beneath Angel’s skin at this realization is hot and dangerous. 

He nods, curt and with another stiff smile before scurrying off. He hates that Husk has seen him like this. 

“I can’t wait.” Angel mutters- more to himself than anything- at the cusp of the doorway. 

And it’s the gospel goddamned truth. 

***

It’s late, definitely later than whatever ballpark time Husk had in mind when he accepted the raincheck for tonight and though Angel knows Husk’s not really one to give much of a shit about punctuality-  when you have eternity ahead of you, ‘on time’ becomes pretty damned relative- he still feels like shit for keeping him waiting.

He’s fidgeting in the back of a sleek, pink limo Val had been kind enough to provide him when, at the end of today’s shoot, Angel had found himself frighteningly unable to walk. Of course, nothing is ever free in this unlife, so Val had taken a cut of his earnings to ‘compensate himself’ for having to cart Angel around, when, if he’d just done as he was told, he wouldn’t have gotten himself hurt enough to need it. 

Angel doesn’t want to buy into the idea, but Val has a point. He needs to be more careful if he’s going to continue being of any use to the hotel. As much as he pretends to be an uncaring freeloader, something itches beneath his skin at the thought of actually becoming one. He can pull his weight. He can pull his goddamned weight.

The limo swerves in front of the hotel and lets him off with little fanfare; Angel gingerly picks his way up the hill to the large front doors, wincing and trying to ignore the stabbing agony going on below his waist with each step. 

He doesn’t expect to see anyone when he walks in, it’s late, and they have ‘redemption’ exercises to do in the morning; even Husk has to have a bedtime and it’s late enough that Angel assumes the time has already passed. Hell, if Angel didn’t have work today he’d probably be asleep by now. 

And yet- as he tiptoes past the threshold, gently pulling the door closed behind him- Angel hears a low rumbling sound. The lights in the lobby are off, as expected, but there’s just enough ambient light to reveal a small lump curled up on the couch. Upon closer inspection, Angel realizes that the sound is purring, and the lump is Husk. 

“What the fuck…” He mutters to himself, as Husk’s purring is interrupted by what Angel can only describe as a hitching snore before resuming with even more force. His wings, which have been wrapped around himself in a facsimile of a blanket, tremble and shudder with the power of the vibrations. Angel has to strangle the coo that tries to escape his lips at the sight. 

Fuck, that’s adorable. He really is just a kitty underneath all that jaded bullshit, huh. Unwitting, Angel’s hand reaches out to coast over the fur on his head. Not quite touching, but close enough to feel the warm shudder of contented purring. It’s enough to make Angel forget about his injuries for the moment, too enamored with the rare sight of a pleasantly sated Husk in the throes of sleep. 

Alas, the bliss of the moment is short-lived, and before Angel can tug his hand away, Husk snatches it out of the air, scrambling up into a sitting position to glare at him and hiss. Okay, even his hissing is kind of cute, but that might just be Angel’s fucked up-ness talking. 

“Hey… Huskie…” Angel eeks, trying to pull his hand away from Husk’s bruising grip. His body’s already got its work cut out with his other injuries, it doesn’t need more paltry bruises to expend its energy on. 

Husk shakes his head and, after a moment, his eyes clear of the film of sleep. Once he recognizes Angel in front of him, he drops his arm, as if burned. 

“Fuck, Angel. Y’can’t sneak up on me like that.” Having regained his senses, he takes a moment to apprise himself of the state of Angel, eyes roving critically over each exposed patch of skin in the dim light. His expression gradually hardens as he becomes more and more aware of just how much damage there is to contend with. Angel, desperate to talk about literally anything but his bleeding body laughs hollowly.

“Yeah, sorry man. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you sleep before, though, did you know you purr?” Husk gives him a blank look at the obvious attempt at deflection but, after a moment, shrugs and scoots over, patting the space beside him on the couch. “I was aware. Must’ve passed out waiting for you.” He scratches at the chops of fur just below his chin as he speaks, seemingly unconcerned with what he’s just said. That he waited for Angel to come back so they could have their raincheck; that he waited up and Angel was late. 

Angel feels a little sick, the mixture of butterflies and sinking despair in his gut creating something entirely new, and entirely nauseating. He winces, but settles on the couch, curling into himself. “Sorry about that, Tuts. Got a little caught up at the studio… Y’know you didn’t have to wait up, right? We can always raincheck another day.”

It’s quiet for a long, excruciating moment, before Angel feels Husk’s eyes on him again. He can’t bring himself to meet them, instead staring further into the relative safety of the knotted wooden floor. Husk sighs.

“I know. I wanted to.” 

Oh. Oh, fuck. Angel is infinitely thankful for the fact that the lights are off because he can feel the aggressive flush working its way up his cheeks and knows it would be incredibly obvious, if it isn’t already. He coughs into one of his hands. 

“But… I was late…? It’s- it’s like four AM. I wouldn't blame you for just going to bed.” Angel isn’t really sure why he’s arguing with Husk about this, all he knows is that none of what has happened since he walked into the hotel has made any goddamn sense, and it’s making his stomach churn. Husk’s tail swishes, hovering lightly over the span of Angel’s hunched shoulders, not touching, but close enough to feel. 

Finally, after another long minute of silence, Husk speaks.

“I just wanted to make sure you got back okay.” Part of Angel swoons at the gentlemanly sentiment, the rest of him bristles at the implication that he needs that. That he can’t make sure he gets back okay on his own. That he’s weak. He whips around to glare at a startled Husk. 

“And you don’t think I can get myself back safely? Fuck you, man, I’m not some weak little damsel in need of saving.” He spits. Husk shakes his head, eyes wide at the vehemence in Angel’s words. His hand raises from his lap- perhaps to reach out, to comfort- but at Angel’s expression, he brings it to his own arm to rub at his tricep sheepishly. 

“Stop putting words in my mouth, Angel.” He scolds, brows furrowed, “I don’t think you’re weak, I just don’t want you to feel like you’re facing this alone.”

Angel scoffs and turns away. Evidently, that’s the breaking point for Husk, because he huffs and snarls, “What? I can’t care about you?” There’s a static to his movements, a ruffling to his fur that indicates real irritation. For some reason, that makes Angel angrier. 

“Not if you’re not fucking me! Not if you don’t get any fucking thing out of it! Fuck!” His wounds give a valiant, biting twinge at the end of his sentence, causing Angel to hunch over himself and press a hand against his side while he struggles to catch his breath. Through the haze of agony, he hears shuffling, and feels the couch straighten as Husk rises to leave. 

Good fucking riddance. Angel knew it was all talk. He knew it. 

His breaths remain ragged for a long time while he tries to get ahold of himself again. Enough, at least, that he can drag himself back to his room. He curses Husk, but more so he curses himself for getting himself into this situation in the first place. What was his one rule? Don’t get attached, don’t let them lure you into thinking they care because they never do, and you’re just going to end up getting your feelings hurt if you keep being stupid about it. 

The pain does not abate, even as his thoughts spiral ever downwards into despair. 

After an excruciating, indeterminate amount of time, he feels the couch dip again and, unwilling to face whatever well-meaning do-gooder it is this time, Angel shakes his head. 

“Leave. Me. Alone.” he grits, each word more painful than the last. The person does not leave.

“Are you gonna let me help you now, or is it going to be another fight?” It’s Husk’s voice. He’s back. Fuck, why is he back? The noise of confusion that bursts from Angel’s lips is entirely unwitting. He opens his mouth to offer a scathing rebuttal, but can only manage a soft groan. Husk scoots closer. He’s warm. Fuzzy.

“Just nod or shake your head. Can I touch you?” Angel takes a moment to think about it, but has to acquiesce to himself that if he doesn’t let Husk touch him, he’s going to be in agony for the rest of the night. With great effort, he nods. A heavy breath punches itself from Husk’s lips, fanning warmly across Angel’s head. 

“Okay. Good. I’m gonna lay you down so I can get a better look.” Angel desperately wants to make a joke about the phrasing of that, but doesn’t get the chance before he's being manhandled onto his back. It’s a familiar situation, but the usual spike of fear in his throat is noticeably absent this time. Angel doesn’t dwell on what that might mean. 

Husk works quickly and efficiently on Angel’s wounds, soothing him with a warm hand through Angel’s hair whenever the pain gets to be too much- punching miserable little sounds from him- and keeping his touches strictly clinical. When he finishes, he sits back on his heels with a sigh. Settling back at the other end of the couch and allowing Angel his personal space again. Angel’s eyes feel surprisingly heavy. He catches a soft look from Husk before they flutter closed. 

Husk chuckles, soft and low.

“See? Doesn’t always have to be a fight.”

[weebsinstash]

Random 'extra yandere' Alastor things because I've been working on a fic and I feel like my yandere aren't yandere'ing enough

- I haven't seen anyone mention this as an idea but like ... why do I see Alastor getting cuteness aggression from his darling? You're really happy and you like idk say something genuine or goofy or happy or you stim or something and he's here "oh, i could just eat you up!" and hugging you so hard it makes you wheeze for air. Would he ever bite you though? Or gently "roughhouse" you? He's kinda feral w it so 😳

- Alastor strikes me as a yandere who would dry your tears with one of his handkerchiefs and then some time later you find out he didn't wash it because it had You Juice on it

- I'm not saying he's hiding in the bushes with a Polaroid or anything but I feel like he'd constantly invite you along to parties or events he's going to where he knows pictures might be taken and he has an absolutely HUGE album of you. He prefers sepia and black and white photographs the most of course, but he'll accept the occasional social media print-out that he may or may not have forced someone else to acquire for him

- this is so lowkey funny but the idea has been growing on me of like. Alastor forcing literally fucking forcing Husker to help him with his obsessive bullshit because Husker has a cellphone. Alastor sees Husker thirstscrolling through Angel's social media, and suddenly the Radio Demon has an idea. "You wouldn't happen to be able to look up my, er, little friend would you?"

Imagine you're like out running errands or even st a club or, somewhere NOT the Hotel and you're suddenly getting a call from... Husker? How weird, he doesn't call you often and you only have his number as another Hotel-goer, so hopefully nothing is wrong? And you answer the phone to Alastor talking far too loudly into the receiver, "HELLO? HELLO, IS THIS BLASTED THING WORKING? I DONT WANT TO BRING IT TOO CLOSE TO MY FACE BECAUSE OF THE RADIATION AND ALL, HAVE YOU PICKED UP YET MY DEAR? HUSKER MY BOY YOU SAID THIS DEVICE WAS WORKING-" like literally actually, this grown ass man who is forcing this other grown ass man who i think age wise is also older than him to do shit like, "what's that photograph in their publications there? Select it. Why is that man standing so close to them? What does HIS 'page' look like? He seems like a rather unsavory fellow who shouldn't be around someone as sweet as-"

- i feel like Alastor has a lot of threatening power purely in his social connections and his own little net of information. Imagine sneaking away from him to go to a speakeasy or something and the bartender already has your photo and knows to keep an eye on you and give Alastor a call if you show up. Imagine going to a jazz club Alastor had taken you to and everyone is nice and friendly and maybe a little TOO friendly because they heard an entirely true rumor about a man who got torn to pieces for asking aloud "so who's that sweet piece over there?" referring to you while Alastor was within earshot

- I dunno if I've mentioned this before but. I like the idea of him meeting his red string soulmate and he's just immediately "well I suppose the proper thing to do is get married then!" Like the man considers it "the traditional way to do things" and just immediately decides that since you two are essentially eternally bound together already, OBVIOUSLY the next step is to be married! I'm talking week one you meet this man and he's insisting the two of you immediately find a living place to share together. Like he might not even be "full yandere" yet but he starts putting you through the motions and gets progressively more attached with time. Day 1 is exchanging names and pleasantries. By Day 4 or 5 he insisting you two sleep in the same house, and eventually, the same bed (partially because he may or may not. Miss you when you're gone)

- imagine a yandere Alastor who is so unwilling to part with you that if he needs to go torture someone or do something unpleasant, he'll just... bring you along. Leaves you nice and cozy in a nice chair with a hot cocoa as he excuses himself to the next room followed by UNIMAGINABLE SCREAMS OF SUFFERING before he returns dripping with blood, "Boy, that one was a GUSHER!" *proceeds to kiss your forehead and drip blood on you and does not care*

- ok so I haven't posted this yet but. Imagine if instead of "patching themselves back together" that when you die in Hell you just respawn in a new body and the old one is still left behind, and you get into a random accident and die and you find out Alastor has been keeping pieces of your body and he's been. Eating you. Drooling heart pupils level of down bad, gorging on your meat, bare handing raw dogging that shit, having your blood seeping between his teeth and fingers. Imagine going into his room and there's a fridge and you open the door and you can tell it's your body because there's just like a whole ass leg that has your tattoo or an old scar. How do you even have that fucking conversation.

You go to shut the fridge and decide you're going to pretend you never saw anything because now you know Oh My God He's Like Actually Genuinely Fucking Nuts and he's already behind you when you turn around😱 and he acts like nothing is wrong. May even joke about how good you taste. Tells a joke about how it would be rather unfortunate if you got hit by a car again, but, hey, maybe you should give him a call whenever more of your meat is available-

- I wanna make a fic out of it because I literally have the fic outlined in my head already but, you know how he's eating just a normal fucking deer in that one episode. Or, if it's not an Earth deer, it doesn't look like it's from Hell at all. I started thinking about what if certain demons know shortcuts or special tricks to still access the human world (if blitz can get a crystal, why not anyone else?) and I love the idea of a Farmer Reader who has wolves eating their livestock and you stake out in the woods in the dead of night and you find out the wolves are only eating your sheep because something has been eating all the deer, and you witness the Radio Demon with your own eyes, horrified at this horned humanoid creature that bends and snaps at angles that just aren't right, with you managing to snipe him right through the head, and he just laughs and praises you for your great shot, and he keeps repeatedly ahowing up on your farm, and he unintentionally or not causes your death and wants you to be with him in Hell. Like you're a good person but you've also done shit where he knows you're gonna go to Hell so he's doing some dramatic shit like cradling your dying body and being all :) eerily happy and jovial as he muses what you might look like "in that awful place down below"

- Hmmmm. Alastor allegedly isn't very materialistic but I like the idea of like. Once he decides how cute and sweet and adorable his darling is, he wants to get you only the best. It won't be, like, EXCESSIVE in the sense Vox could be, but, if he gets you gifts, they're always of a certain level of quality. If he begins to style and dress you, he wants you in high quality fabrics that will last and don't have any unsavory materials or harsh colorants in it. I may or may not like the idea of him taking you to a tailor and he gets you an outfit to match his very own and if anyone ever gets a speck of dirt on it or anything else he's gotten you to wear, they're getting absolutely fucking MOLLYWOPPED

[oobbbear]

What does the water guy do? :o

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!! Mention of suicidal thoughts too!!!!! You’ve been warned!!!!!

The meaning behind this drawing is that in the story Dolus was drowned in the ocean, he was in a very bad place both physically and mentally at the time, so in contrast the cold ocean water feels more like a relief than danger, like a warm hug comforting him saying all of these are going to be over soon you can rest now, that’s why the caption says “Like a hug” this is where the idea of the Water angel first originated

Remember in the first comic “Rubber”, Life says that Dolus will be visiting Death a lot? He did he visited death a lot, he’s body have the power to self heal whenever he got seriously injured, and when his body’s healing his soul just chill in Death’s place until he can go back. He’s basically invincible till he got killed by the “right tool” according to Life’s word.

The ‘right tool’ here is the acceptance of death, he can only truly die if he chose to, not by accident not by fucking around to see what can kill him, he can only die if he truly wants to, and he has to do it by himself.

This is a conversation between Life(L) and Death(D)

The water angel is the personification of the “right tool”/his “weak spot” or simply Dolus’ death. Dolus took time and thought through his decision before taking the hand of the angel who will lead him to his eternal rest

The angel is not real it is more of a little creature Dolus imagined to help him cope

The angel would act very clingy and demanding when the thought of end is on his mind, it will ask for his acceptance and pray for his attention

It hypes up when he’s hyped, it calms down when he is calm, it is apart of him, a part he doesn’t know how to deal with but don’t want to get rid of. It hurts when it gets aggressive but can be comforting at time needed

This is basically all I got for the Water angel, hope this explains something! it is a very weird part of my story that I don’t know how to fit into the comic.

[tonydaddingham]

so i saw this post and the reply underneath it

and what if ... god was turned mortal and born as ... agnes nutter ...

oh i love-loved that art, i know it was meant to be based on the moon meme but it's so good!!!✨ but let's get into a little bit of speculation, eh? now's a good a time as any!!!

hmm, came to earth as agnes nutter? it's an interesting thought and would be really cool, but im not entirely convinced. but agnes was absolutely meant to be a personification of god, i think that's without doubt.

but i think there might be some kind of clue as to what happened - and will happen - to god in agnes' brief but important narrative. if we take her story as a hypothetical direct parallel to god, agnes ended up being hunted down and burned on a pyre as a witch, but then did an ol' bait and switch and blew everyone and herself up (bitch behaviour, gorgeous, stunning).

but what if this is similar to what happened to god?

we know that the last canonical time her voice appears is speaking to job, when she starts challenging him on asking her questions. to me, she's essentially saying that he has no right to do so, which echoes the same kind of rhetoric that is implied by the fall. aziraphale and crowley can't seem to hear what she is saying - her voice from their perspective is muffled - and i know others have remarked that her voice sounds manufactured (like, in the narrative itself). also in job, there is a key lighting difference - heaven is swathed in golden heavenly light, compared to the stark white it is now.

however, despite the voice being fake school of thought, im inclined to believe that she is actually present. this, to me, is supported by aziraphale's dynamic in heaven; gabriel and michael obviously have the wrong end of the stick where concerns job's fate, that much is true, but i do think the general vibe is that they are a touch more collaborative with him than in s1, where it felt much more cold, and laden with subtle but aggressive superiority:

essentially, it feels more here that they are indeed following god (obviously still immoral in doing so, but they seem so much more innocent and almost teamlike?). im possibly projecting and misinterpreting here, but i do think nonetheless there is a big difference between the character behaviour of the angels between job and 2019.

now there was this brilliant meta put forward by @amuseoffyre✨ that looked at gabriel's weird iterations when he 'remembers', and how it overlaps with what sounds like god's voice. it frankly hasn't left my brain since, because to my mind, the book of life might come into this. the theme of memory being lost, but also possibly memory being scattered, is very prevalent in s2. my thoughts on the book of life are that it essentially doesn't necessarily erase life/existence, but in the context of angels specifically erases the essence of their divinity (ie. falling) - which maybe to angels is the same as losing who they are, and by extension parts of their memory.

so what if god was written into the book of life? well im not 100% convinced that it's as simple as that - it's GO after all, it never is that simple. in any case, for what purpose she might have been written in (other than metatron essentially being machiavellian by nature but that's by the by) is similarly uncertain; i could imagine a good ol' fashioned power struggle possibly has a hand in it somewhere. but again, this just doesn't seem to be quite right.

for this next bit, where i think possibly god might have gone/done, im going to refer to nietzsche and his famous statement, "god remains dead, and we have killed him." to me, this doesn't mean that god never existed or a lack of belief in god is now absolute, but instead that other belief systems potentially will replace, and have replaced, god. now, that could be belief in science, or other theology and philosophy, or just plain belief in oneself. and the prospect is dangerous, as nietzsche also elaborates, because it's irreversible, and there will always exist the need to replace it with something in order to avoid complete nihilistic belief.

so going off of this, if god is no longer untouchable - unquestionable - where does that leave us? well, it leaves us like job; being put through trials and horrors that are being challenged for their necessity and the morality in exacting them. it starts us on the same journey as aziraphale - does god truly intend this to happen? if so, why would she? is this a system - a god - i want to trust and believe in anymore? (coincidentally, crowley on the whole, and particularly at start of s2, appears to have gone straight to the nihilistic end of the spectrum following the fall, and through his development since the fall is instead slowly working his way backwards to finding faith in something again, and meet aziraphale in the metaphorical middle).

but back to the story, and agnes: i think the above is going to be posed in s3, and would tie in narratively with what i anticipate will be a recounting of the fall. that collectively - same as the witchfinders and the village did to agnes - humanity and heaven and hell may start to question the power behind god, and whether god herself can be challenged in her plan, the morality and ethics of it, and what it means for true free will. the only issue is, i think, is that in god possibly having retreated after job, because that's when that line of questioning kind of started amongst her people and amongst her angels, metatron has rushed to fill the vacuum and pretends that he is still acting in her name.

the conclusion i come to after all this ridiculous rambling is this: i think that god did intend to step back from heaven, but didn't leave anything to fill the void - hence the absolute chaos that has ensued since. i think she has surrendered herself over to the allegorical pyre, seen it coming and has accepted that her death - the loss of blind faith in her - is needed for humanity to progress.

maybe the last thing she'll do is a bait and switch; who that metaphorical mix of gunpowder and roofing nails will hit, and why, i don't know...

or maybe it won't happen at all, and this is where the parallel diverges from agnes' story? actually reaching a peaceful and acceptable ending, where free will will actually flourish and determinism borne of her omniscience will dwindle into nothing?

if you or anyone made it to this point, well-bloody-done because that was A Lot!!!✨

[brainyrot]

Based off of what Madam Toony said, what do you think their reactions would be individually?

Aah. Well, for one, batim wouldn't be too weirded out. Honestly, he's from a world where multiple people are the same character at once, so he's cool with finding another bendy, Boris, and whoever the rest are. Though he'd be wondering when someone got turned into a bendy.

Cuphead, he'd be confused. Considering that's bendy just with different clothing. He'd be wary, and not trusting in the slightest batim.

Mugman? The same as Cuphead, he just won't show it. rather he'd act friendly but still wary.

Boris? If bendy wasn't around, pretty much like everyone, he'd mistake batim as his brother. But if he figured it's not his brother, he'd think it's a memory, but also..he wasn't using the record. So how?

Bendy? Kind of watching himself in the mirror, a mix of confusion but also not caring much, kind of like everything at this point. But he wouldn't be aggressive (depends on when you get him) but he'd be asking questions.

holly? fascinated. But also really weirded out. But she's too curious to care, she's asking questions.

Felix? Same as Cuphead. He's got already some experience on people acting like someone else.

Cala? i would say like mugman? Or straight up not understanding what is going on.

hat? Same as holly, just with..less good intentions.

alice? Mix of cala, mugs and Boris. Maybe a little bit horrified considering probably the difference of power between her bendy and batim. Batim's aura Is definitely as suffocating and cold as the devil, since he's in a way or another, also a ruler, and a strong one at that.

Which now makes me think..now that the end record isn't around, batim is officially immortal, omnipotent and immune to the ink illness as he's made of ink. Imagine how strong his aura must feel to demons and angels.

And batim isn't as confused as bendy, he knows how to control his powers, he isn't in demon puberty, he knows what he can and cannot do. He's just in a cuter form of his and mostly confused.

[archvaxe]

More Lore for Bayonetta 3!

[[I might get some weird looks from Bayo fans if I said I loved Singularity as a villain (his dark humor is just so sassy, especially the scene where he made the French soldiers dance). But because Bayonetta 3 in general left a lot of questions unanswered about the story, I decided to give Singularity more lore, in the form of the notebooks we would find throughout the game. I thought it would be kind of interesting if we found notebooks from a scientist who had accidentally created Singularity or someone who had witnessed it from beginning to end]].

Part 1:

PAGE:1

6.6.20XX

Dr.S[REDACTED]

[DATA DELETED]

Science can be so fascinating and exquisite that I have decided to write down my research in notes, even if it means breaking the strict rules of my superior. Such a phenomenon that mankind has achieved must be recorded, as our will has brought us this far to create something that surpasses even magic in the afterlife!

Many may wonder whether magic or witchcraft actually exists in our world, whether they are real or just a superstition of society? Or perhaps beings that whisper in our ears to do good or evil. In my research I have worked with a few organizations investigating these superstitions and as thought there really are beings walking invisibly in our world, in an accurate representation of demons or angels you read about in old books! They can be above, beside or below us and we would not notice anything except just feel their presence!

However, this interesting research was interrupted for some time because there were some "accidents" when we tried to capture and study these beings. We have tried to use sophisticated glasses to locate and study these beings and well... if I should put it right, many of us don't come into God's garden when we die. The invisible beings we call demons seem to be much more aggressive so we have rarely approached them.

But now that I think about it I can swear as a child I would have seen these beings many times but unfortunately lost that gift as an adult...I can swear I had an invisible friend as a young boy that I called Gabriel, he had beautiful white wings and looked like a big bird...but maybe I was just imagining it.

But now to the main point of my research, which was actually very top secret, that every little word could cost you your life [but I hope that nobody will get hold of these notes except if suddenly the catastrophe will come and these notes might be useful, which is a very small chance that this will happen, I hope]

Exactly two days ago we managed to create a real Homunculi! [Accidentally even, because of a small accident that happened at our station] One that could think and analyze like an advanced AI, not like the early Homunculi prototypes that didn't work properly and still require high energy to function [But I'm working day and night to finally find the necessary energy key to these bioweapons that could control them en masse without requiring much energy, an advanced mother computer would be perfect to control these weapons with a long loop on their back]

My team and I were amazed that through a stupid misunderstanding we created such a AI, for some reason I felt proud and powerful, more powerful than God who could not create life the way we did. My team didn't understand the admiration I felt towards this AI, many of them were sure that this being we created had no will, so it wouldn't think of subjugating its creators. But I completely disagreed, this AI was more than that.

We have created something with a will.

[fabdante]

Related to a post I just reblogged (can I send you a link in an ask, or will Tumblr eat the ask if I do that?), but Dante and/or Kat with plant powers would be cool, too. Especially if Dante gets his plant powers from his mom's side, since the Angel barriers in the game already look like vines, and the first Angel weapon you get, Osiris, is a scythe.

I also kinda like the idea of Dante occasionally working as a psychopomp, just because things have gotta be kinda fucked after Mundus died, right? I'm not really sure if I remember exactly what Mundus did with human souls, but it was mentioned in Mission 17/Furnace of Souls, right? I think that's the main thing I'm thinking of. Help? Is it explained more in extra/side content?

Anyway, Dante helping lost souls/ghosts pass on would be Neat, especially since, at least in the original DMC continuity, ghosts exist, and can even interact with the living to carry out their unfinished business. I'm not sure if ghosts would exist in the reboot universe, but I mean, maybe?

Seeing Dante freeing more souls like the ones trapped in Bob's prison or Mundus' tower would be cool too. It's not really clear if those people are still ALIVE- Bob, at least, tells his prisoners that "suicide is impossible", and there's those weird, screaming trains that run through Bob's prison, and its never explained wtf is up with THOSE, but it looks bad, and it's Bob's prison, so something's gotta be fucky there- but if so, they probably need some help. Or, well, a LOT of help, but it'd be good to see Dante do whatever he could to help them.

Same for Dante working with Kat and Phineas to help stop places like St. Lamia's Orphanage from running. The most they could probably legally get away with is killing any demons that run the place cruelly, but at least it'd be SOMETHING.

I'm not sure if links cause asks to get eaten but I checked your account and found the post in question! I suppose also I just never thought of plant powers as something relegated to like softer, healing uses before either asdfghj i feel like all plant based characters I know of tend to use their plant powers fairly aggressively so I just sort of saw that as the default.

But, anyway, the connection between Eva and possible plant powers is cool I think (especially with the Osiris, scythe connection)!! Though I'm not sure if it's a powerset I think fits Dante, even when used more aggressively. I would love plant powers Kat though, it feels fitting to her particularly in the duel use of plants as both something soft and healing but also dangerous and deadly. It feels fitting to her. I could see this as something Eva might have been able to do to, especially given her blue roses she seems to somehow be able to grow despite them not being real. I think it makes a lot of sense for Eva and it'd be interesting to see her sharing that ability with her sons.

The game is very vague about what Mundus did with the souls. There's an implication that the souls torment is some sort of power source for the demons but it's not really elaborated upon. I'm assuming that no one found it particularly relevant to clarify which I guess is fair, it doesn't really come up all that much.

We also don't really know the status of the human souls in the game but I figured they were all dead at this point. As for Bobs prison I think there's probably a mix of the dead and the living and those kind of in between though we cannot forget also that he has demons and other supernatural beings in there as well, who likely are not dead at all who he can easily be referring to. I imagine trying to bring some piece to the dead would be something Dante and the post game gang would be interested in, though it's probably a daunting task given how many there are.

Also the trains I always assumed were a hold over from an earlier level design. The devs talk a lot about how they really, really wanted a train fight scene for the bulk of the games development but it either got too complicated or constraints got in the way so they had to get rid of it during development. I always figured the subways in Bobs mission were just a holdover from that plan or a sort of consolation prize for the effort that went into the non existent train boss fight asdfghjk so they got to keep their train, even if it didn't get used as intended. if it has larger implications to the lore that's possible, but the part of Bob's prison its in is modeled after a subway hub so I think it's just to tie into those visuals from the real world location Bob's prison is mimicking in Limbo. All of this is to say I'm not sure if the trains are exactly carrying anything as much as they are mimicking their real world counterparts (the real world metro system of Limbo City)

I also just kind of figured the orphanages like St. Lamias just sort of fell apart when Limbo collapsed into the real world. With their staff revealed to be demons, I'm not sure if they'd be allowed to continue operating. I'm also not sure how much Kat, Dante, or Phineas would care about keeping up with legality when it came to dismantling that kind of thing seeing as Kat was willing to join the Order to dismantle the system which abused her and nothing the Order did was particularly legal. I can see this however being something that'd be on Kat's radar, given it's a major motivator for her this whole time. The issue though now I think would turn a lot to the systemic issues within the American foster care system which is a far bigger fish to fry then demons unfortunately.

Which is all to say I do think the systems that hurt them would be on Kat and Dantes radar but that'd definitely be a tricky one to deal with in the midsts of Limbo City's mayhem.

[airanke]

I had this weird dream last night that abiteth was in a love triangle with dabi and… fuckin angel dust from hazbin hotel??? Anyways abi chose angel (despite the fact that he’s a canonically gay demon) and dabi was chasing after them on a highway, demanding abi get back together with him, while abi was busy making out with angel aksjksjsj

ANON, HOLD ON, WAIT, HEAR ME OUT--

I DO have some Abiteth/Dabi Hazbin Hotel AU thoughts, and OMFG, I 100% saw her as someone that not only was also a spider demon, but WORKED WITH ANGEL DUST???? On top of being very sought out by (and consistently tempted to make a deal with) Valentino, she always always ALWAYS flocked to Angel Dust when they were on set together and he feels safe with her (like he does with Cheri!!!).

It was stated by Viv that Angel Dust will have sex with women, but naturally charges more for his efforts in that case, though not currently confirmed that he'll do this in the series itself yet, so BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I CAN 100% SEE WHERE YOU ARE COMING FROM AND ABITETH WOULD DO ANYTHING TO PROTECT ANGEL (except make a deal with Valentino because Angel would so so SO not want her to do that, but watch her go make a deal with Alastor Just Because TM. Also realistically, Valentino could force him to do whatever he wants because... Valentino ._. ).

I'm not super sold on Abiteth being a porn star in the way Angel Dust is, BUT she would definitely make appearances as like, a back up dancer or as a body in shots (and I mean also feature in her own solo videos or whatever, she has major femme fatale / dominatrix vibes) if they happened to be in the same video together.

She'd be a HUGE thorn in Valentino's side either way, and I don't know yet if she's actually Hellborn or a Sinner (which I think can affect how powerful she is 🤔🤔I should probably watch Hazbin again just to brush up on my lore in that regard, or actually watch Helluva Boss LOL).

BUT POOR DABI IN UTTER DISBELIEF THAT ABITETH WOULD CHOOSE ANGEL DUST OVER HIM!!!! I see him totally as some kind of Hellhound, but not necessarily a Hellborn hellhound BUT UM!!! We'll see 🤗🤗 I'm just imagining Dabi on a motorcycle barking and carrying on that Abiteth COME THE FUCK BACK RIGHT NOW, and she and Angel are just zooming on down the road in a hearse with someone??? Else driving so they can make out in the backseat HAHAODFSADFSUHO omg love you for telling me this <3333

Totally alternatively, Abiteth would be a fallen angel with spider thematics, and may or may not have been an Exterminator BUT IT'S ALL UP IN THE AIR RIGHT NOW!!! Either way, very protective of Angel Dust, will and definitely has attacked Valentino (when Angel isn't around, which may also unfortunately contribute to how Val treats Angel at times given how he acted when Charlie tried to help... only unlike Charlie, Abiteth is more aggressive/volatile HAHA)

I'M ALSO SORRY MY ANSWER TO THIS IS ALL OVER THE PLACE //WHEEZE

[icharchivist]

ironically Sariel being like the one person Belial doesn't use the whole weird flirty thing with (and doesn't have the obfuscating and passive aggression of his interactions with Lucifer) also means he's the one person who ended up actually loving him for the few mostly genuine gestures he's put forward. actively doesn't try to seduce this one and he falls in love with his actual self and dreams of kissing him under the moonlight--

DLJFJDLFJDF NO BUT RIGHT.

Though honestly i wouldn't be surprised Belial's flirting IS also in general something he does to put distances with others, like, if he grosses them out enough they won't try to know about him.

and I feel like Sariel is like... just so out of touch with everything? Like, he was made to be a mindless drone who just couldn't help but to mind because yknow. actual living being and all.

if Belial was his usual flirty self or passive aggressive self with Sariel, i doubt Sariel would care or mind or even understand what Belial is doing. He'll probably just ask what that meant and Belial just. wouldn't know how to explain.

But also like... Sariel represents exactly what Belial said he hated about being a primal. That they're created to be slave to a purpose even if this purpose makes them miserable, and they cannot move away from it. And Sariel is typically "was made for a purpose, only ever did this purpose because he had no choice nor time away from it, and was so miserable he just wished he was dead already".

and i think that all of this together just made it impossible for Belial to treat Sariel like everyone else because he at least gets what Sariel is going through and he feels his misery and he feels bad for him. and he knows that Sariel is so miserable and disconnected from reality because he wants to stop existing so badly, that like. how do you even disturb a guy like that? The guy doesn't even have enough will to live to even be disgusted for a minute.

So Belial shows kindness instead and probably doesn't expect Sariel to pick it up because Sariel is so miserable that he probably doesn't expect this kindness to get him out of the gutter. But it does. It does make life a little more bearable for Sariel.

So it's like. Belial doesn't bother putting on his mask around Sariel because it's not like Sariel actually cares enough about life in general to pick up all of the signals Belial sends to seduce or push people away.

But just this sincerity, this rare kindness, did make Sariel genuinely care for Belial because for once he wasn't seen as a tool, but as a person worth caring after.

Oghh just thinking about the slight moment of confusion with Belial when he realizes Sariel is trying to protect him during 000 and that when Sandalphon tells him to step out because Belial is planning to destroy the world, Sariel is just "i don't care. He's the only one who's ever been kind to me. I'll do anything for him." is like. God imagine being Belial and hearing that.

Like Belial's devotion for Lucilius is all about how he'd do anything for him, anything at all, if only to be loved even a little, and he isn't. And then he sees someone with this exact devotion toward him while Belial never tried to manipulate him or use him or anything. If anything he only ever wanted to keep Sariel out of suffering (see how he enrolled him in the Fallen Angels when Sariel was despairing over his purpose, and then looked genuinely shocked seeing the state Sariel was in now after being subjected to the Chaos energy). The one time Belial gets someone to genuinely look out for him unconditionally.

AND LIKE. The fact Belial has been so genuine with Sariel that now that he's trying to put his Big Bad Mask again to make sure Sariel doesn't get attached to him while Belial is on a self destructing journey, Sariel sees right through it!! like. When Belial tore Sariel's wings out and took the power of the chaos energy that was killing Sariel in, he made it all about how "oh Sariel you're so naive, don't you know i backstab people", he tried so hard to make himself a monster in Sariel's eyes there to push him away, which fell completely flat the moment Sariel realized that if he had kept his wings, he would have died, and Belial specifically tore the wings out to save him, and then just put on this betrayal mask so Sariel wouldn't sacrifice himself for him.

like jikes! you've been a little too honest once and now your little protegee cannot believe the lies you've mastered so well to make sure the whole world hates you, and now you have One Person who wants to find you no matter what again.

Like congratulation Belial, you managed to be genuine enough with One Person and now you have someone more into you than any of the people you ever flirted with including the man you're in love with. Congratz!

[whelvenwings]

Up to Date?

Length: ~5k Tags: Canon Divergent, Y yo a ti Cas timeline, Misunderstandings

It's three months after Castiel was brought back from the Empty after confessing his love to Dean, and things are awkward between them. They haven't talked about it. Castiel can feel how much Dean wants to, but he won't let himself, and Castiel can only wait. But one night, with Castiel halfway across the world, he gets a text from Dean that might change everything - even if Dean didn't quite mean it to.

Castiel

It was just awkward. Castiel couldn’t deny it. Things between himself and Dean were definitely awkward.

Three months back on Earth, safe from the Empty with a little help from the Winchesters and from Jack – but Castiel and Dean still hadn’t talked about it. The things that Castiel had said – and what Dean had said in return.

I love you. Me too, Cas.

Castiel knew he should have expected this, the awkwardness. Hadn’t he known Dean long enough, at this point, to be able to predict him? And there was nothing more predictable than Dean not wanting to talk about something.

Still, it hurt. There had been that shining moment of happiness, if a word as soft as happiness was even the right way to describe the feeling of absolute blazing corrosive joy that Castiel had felt when Dean had told him that his feelings were reciprocated. And now, there was just… silence.

It was awkward.

And Castiel didn’t know what to do. Was Dean waiting for him to say something? But Castiel had already said it all. It was Dean who’d only managed to choke out a few words, Dean who must have more to say. And yet he said nothing. Days were slipping past full of staring and loaded sentences and quietness.

The fact that it was all so familiar didn’t make it any better. Castiel wanted something different. It had been different before they’d said anything out loud, but – but there had been something about hearing Dean say those words, me too, Cas, that had changed everything.

He didn’t need much. Nothing grand or unusual, only something to ease the tension. Even if it was just an expression on Dean’s face that acknowledged what had passed between them, instead of pushing it away.

But Dean… Castiel knew it was different for him. There were things that Dean didn’t allow himself, for a tangle of reasons that Castiel only barely understood. Dean didn’t let himself touch. Dean didn’t let himself speak. Dean didn’t let himself look.

But Dean wanted to.

Castiel knew Dean wanted to. So many aching years that Dean had longed for him, and Castiel had been able to feel it like a prayer – and not some soft and murmured thing, a prayer of an older kind, something raw and wordless and desperate. Something on its knees. Castiel could feel the yearning in Dean. It would have been so simple for Castiel to offer touch, but Dean hadn’t ever really let him. And Dean still wasn’t letting him.

And Castiel could still feel the longing.

When they were together, and when they were several thousand miles apart, too. It was there. Never any quieter or gentler, not even from far away. It always touched the same place in Castiel’s grace that it had done from the start. And the feeling of it was just the same, too, like being doused in oil and dropped into flames that reached and hoped and hungered.

Beautiful fire. A beautiful prayer. Castiel wanted to answer it. Dean behaved as though he didn’t know it was there.

The tension in the bunker had become too much, last night, and Castiel had abruptly left with just a quick text to Dean.

> I’m going to look for the artifact Sam read about in Seoul. It shouldn’t be left unguarded.

The artifact was probably just a trinket, if Castiel was being honest with himself, and its significance paled in comparison to everything they’d been through, but it was a reason to get away from everything and give himself a break. It would have only taken Castiel moments to find the artifact if he’d wanted, but he drew it out. He walked rather than flying, pacing the streets of Seoul, following up on the leads that Sam had found. His grace hummed and sighed against Dean’s prayer.

He hoped that when he returned, something might be different. That he and Dean could talk. Maybe even – as he walked down a side-street with neon lights that glowed through the drizzling rain, Castiel allowed himself a wry little smile. Maybe even do something together. Go somewhere. Go on a date.

A date. To a human the word would probably sound little, and normal, and silly for an angel to be thinking about. But to Castiel, it just sounded like something new.

And it was so easy, somehow, to picture Dean coming into the bunker's kitchen, pointing at Castiel semi-aggressively, and saying, so. You, me, date. Up for it?

Would that be how Dean would phrase it? Castiel tried it a few different ways in his head. Down for it? How about it? You in? Each time, the Dean in Castiel's mind looked almost angry as he waited for an answer. Each time, Dean's face softened when Castiel said, yes.

So easy to imagine. So out of reach. Castiel walked on through Seoul, the rain starting to thrum down harder.

–––––

Dean

It was awkward.

Dean knew it was awkward, and he wasn’t thinking about it – he wasn’t. Except when Cas did stupid shit like ditching the bunker without warning, leaving just some handwritten note like a kid sneaking out of his tent at summer camp, it made it kind of harder to ignore.

Staring down at the note in the bunker’s library, Dean pressed his lips together and read it over again, his eyes scanning the words while his brain paid no attention to them, lost in thought.

There was something so ridiculous about it all. The moment between them, the – whatever it had been, when they’d admitted their crap to each other – it felt so overblown to look back on. Sure, Cas had had to summon the Empty, he’d had to get all deep just to save Dean’s hide. But Dean… what he’d said had just been stupid. No point to it. Dean cringed when he thought about it.

Me too, Cas.

The words were so little like something Dean would ever say that they might as well have been in a foreign language. Me too, Cas? That kind of thing didn’t have to be said. Because obviously, him too. But what were they supposed to do about it? Buy each other flowers? Feed each other chocolates? God forbid – hold hands?

Dean felt a little hot rush in his chest just thinking about it, and an accompanying stab of guilt. What were they, seventeen? They were old. Too old for flowers and chocolates. Too old for holding hands. And too old for this weird tension between them, Jesus. Who got nervous and tongue-tied and awkward around a crush at Dean’s age?

Who called it a crush at Dean’s age?

Dean, sat in the library at the bunker, dropped the note Cas had left and picked up his phone. Practicalities. Just focus on the practicalities. He should at least make sure Sam had kept Cas up to date with the latest research about the artifact that might be hidden in Seoul.

Dean tapped on the screen of his phone for a few seconds, holding it a little further away from his eyes than he used to have to do. He read over what he’d typed once, and then hit send.

–––––

Castiel

Castiel’s phone hummed.

With a little clench in his gut, Castiel stepped under the cover of a dark doorway to get out of the rain, and pulled it out of his pocket. Dean’s name was on the screen, obviously. There was the usual leap of excitement, tinged with a familiar sinking feeling in his chest. Dean would probably be angry with him for leaving.

With a stoic line to his jaw, Castiel opened the text, knowing it couldn’t be anything good.

> So. You up to date?

Castiel stared down at his phone.

No… no. He couldn’t have read that right. He blinked, and tried it again.

It still said the same thing.

You up to date?

Dean had just asked Castiel if he was… up to date? If he… wanted to date?

However many times Castiel reread the text, it said the same thing. Castiel stood absolutely still, his eyes puzzling out the letters of Dean’s message again and again.

It was – it was just the way Castiel had imagined it, if not word perfect. The brusque tone, the question. Castiel, half in shadow in a porch in rainy Seoul, stared down at his phone as if it had just promised him the moon.

Dean had just asked Castiel if he was up for dating.

Via text. Obviously. Maybe all this time, it had just been that trying to talk face-to-face had been too much. Maybe Castiel should have left for halfway across the world months ago.

Castiel could feel his heart pounding. He couldn’t stop himself reading Dean’s question, over and over again.

–––––

Dean

When the text from Cas finally came back, Dean snatched up his phone. It wasn’t that he’d been sitting and staring at it, waiting for a reply – he’d just got a little lost in thought, was all, wondering where Cas was and why he wasn’t answering sooner.

The text, though, when Dean read it, put a frown on his face.

> I’m so glad you asked. Yes, I would love to.

Wait. What? Dean checked over what he’d said himself in his first text, just to be sure he hadn’t made some kind of a typo. Nope, he’d definitely just asked if Cas was up to date with the artifact.

So, Cas would love to… what?

Cas was glad he’d asked about what?

None of it sounded like the answer to a simple question about research on an artifact, at all. Maybe Cas was just in the middle of something, and misread Dean’s text. Not something that had ever happened before, but still. Whatever.

Dean circled his thumbs over the keyboard on his screen, and then typed a reply.

< Love to do what

Keep it simple, he figured.

He sat puzzling over Cas’ first message as he waited for a reply. So glad you asked. What did that even mean? Was Cas ever particularly glad when Dean asked anything?

The reply came back quickly, this time.

> Anything you want to do. :) Maybe just going to a bar?

Dean squinted down at his phone.

Anything he wanted to do about what? A bar?

Was he losing it? Dean reread the text over and then over again, and looked back up their conversation to try to make Cas’ reply make sense. The emoticon was typical enough, even though Dean hadn’t seen a smiley one in a while. The way it made his chest squeeze was ridiculous. It was just a smile. And it just followed the words, anything you want to do.

Before he could let his mind run too far with what exactly that could mean, Dean texted back in confusion,

< You want to go to a bar?

There was something about this conversation that was making his heart beat harder. Come on, he told it. What, you can face down the end of the world more than once and a little text conversation still has you like this?

Ignoring his solid logic, Dean’s heart only raced faster when Cas texted back,

> Yes, of course. Unless you think it’s a bad idea?

So… Cas wanted to go to a bar? With Dean?

That was – well, it wasn’t that strange on Dean’s personal spectrum of strange to not strange these days. Fighting Death and God and God’s sister and all the rest of it kind of put a bunch of other strange crap way down the list. But this was still… weird. Not bad weird, necessarily.

But how had they got here, why were they talking about this? What kind of a bar, why? Dean had just wanted to check up on Cas in a few brief words and suddenly they were making evening plans? Cas was making no sense. Was he doing it on purpose? Dean read the whole conversation over again, and pulled a face of utter and annoyed confusion for the benefit of no one, and shook his head.

He thought about it, and licked his lips, and shook his head again.

And then thought some more, and made a hand gesture, as if asking of no one, what the fuck.

He texted out,

< What do u mean

He stared down at the text for a second, and then deleted it, and tried instead,

< Why are we talking about this

He didn’t even read that one over again before deleting it. He made another face, and then quickly typed and sent,

< But you’re in Seoul

However they’d arrived at the idea of going to a bar, it didn’t particularly matter when Castiel was thousands of miles away. Had deliberately ditched, in fact, which was more of an obstacle to them having a nice evening out tonight than the distance between them, but Dean wasn’t going to say that directly.

> Only for a short while longer. I’ve almost completed the search for the artifact. Then I’ll come back :)

Another damn smiley face, another little lift in Dean’s chest. Look at him. Fully grown, and soft over the idea of his best friend looking forward to spending an evening together. Yikes.

Practicalities. Dean fired off another text.

< Okay... you just wanna talk or what

If Cas was going to try to insist that they talk about stuff, well – the drinks would probably be a good place to start, but Dean would need to psych himself up to the idea of trying to explain anything at all that had happened between them. Me too, Cas. He kept hearing himself say it and wanting to bury his head in his hands. What had he been thinking. What had Cas been thinking, when he’d decided on Dean. That had to earn the award for the worst fucking choice in the history of the world.

Dean’s phone buzzed in his hands.

> I think talking is what people usually do on a date. But we don’t have to if you don’t want to.

Dean’s eyes went wide.

–––––

Castiel

Across the world, in the porch in Seoul, Castiel watched as Dean’s little typing bubble with three dot dot dots appeared, and disappeared, and reappeared.

He tried to quiet the excitement in his chest, tried to remind himself that Dean had just implied fairly heavily that he wouldn’t want to talk on their date – which wasn’t unexpected for Dean, but it did leave Castiel wondering what else Dean might want to do.

A thought occurred to Castiel about something they might be able to do without talking, and he swallowed, and felt his hopes fly higher.

Or perhaps Dean just wanted to sit together in silence. That would be alright, too. Companionship in the quiet. When he thought about it, Castiel knew it would be more than enough just to sit by Dean in a bar and drink together, knowing that they were both choosing to be there. Even if they didn’t say a single word the whole evening, even if Dean didn’t so much as look at him the whole night. They could spend the date speechlessly. But it would be a date. It would be an acknowledgement. Maybe it would ease a little of the longing that Castiel felt and felt and felt from Dean, burning.

Finally, a text from Dean came in.

> Wait what

Wait, what?

Castiel felt his heart sink.

There was something wrong. That tone, just two stark words – something wasn’t right. Castiel scrolled back up their conversation. Had he accidentally said something rude? He couldn’t find it, reading the texts over and then over again. He’d used emoticons to show that he was happy. Had they seemed sarcastic?

Did it seem as though Castiel didn’t really want to go on a date? Or that he wouldn’t really be content for them to not talk on the date? Hurriedly, Castiel began typing again.

< I mean it. We don’t have to say anything. I just want to be there with you.

It was the kind of text that Castiel would ordinarily type out and then delete because it was too forthright, too emotional, too much for Dean – but this time, he just hit send before he could think about it. Worse than Dean being grossed out by Castiel openly having feelings was the idea of Dean not knowing that Castiel really did feel those things.

There was a long silence. Castiel stood still, waiting for Dean.

How many times had he stood, quiet, expectant, wanting Dean to be ready, hoping he would be ready, prepared to wait for an eternity until he was? In the span of Castiel’s own lifetime, he’d waited just a blink of an eye. But somehow this blink had been torturously slow. A torture Castiel would have fought to the death before trading.

Castiel’s phone hummed.

> You really want to go on a date

Castiel stared down at the screen. He couldn’t tell if the tone was judgemental or vulnerable. He blinked, and thought hard – and then, with a little shake of his head and hard press of his lips, he made a choice.

Quite suddenly, the street in Seoul was empty.

–––––

Dean

Dean almost fell out of his chair when Cas appeared opposite him in the bunker.

“Shit!” Dean swore, grabbing the table in front of him with one hand. He watched as Cas tilted his head just slightly sideways at Dean’s other hand, instinctively on the butt of his gun.

He eased his hold.

“Could’ve killed you,” Dean mumbled. Cas smiled wryly.

“You could have tried,” he said.

Dean swallowed. Right. Angel powers were all the way back up, these days.

“You’re back,” he said blankly, just to say something, because immediately leaving the room didn’t seem like it would be a good idea – however much the nervousness in his brain was insisting that this conversation wasn’t going to go well, and he needed to bail.

“Yes.” Cas lifted his phone up to face Dean, so that Dean could read their conversation on the screen. Dean glanced over it. It was strange seeing his own words on the left side of the screen, almost embarrassing. “What does this mean?” Cas asked.

Dean got to his feet, feeling too low down still in his chair.

“Uh…” He watched Cas warily, while trying to keep his tone light. “You tell me, Cas.”

“No,” Cas said firmly. “You asked me if I really wanted to go on a date.”

“Yeah,” Dean said.

Cas stared at him, clearly expecting more. Dean tried waiting him out for a few seconds in silence, hoping Cas would say something else, but Cas had that determined look in his eye that told Dean he was going to have to be the one to say something.

“What about it?” Dean said.

“What does the question mean?” Cas asked.

“Well, Cas, it’s kind of all right there. In the message.”

“You just asked if I really want to go on a date,” Cas said again.

“Yeah,” Dean said. “So, do you?”

It was all wrong. His tone was all wrong. It was aggressive, and blunt. He sounded outright angry at the idea that Cas might actually want to go on a date, and that tone didn’t even vaguely map over the ridiculous leap in his chest at the idea of a date together.

But somehow, Cas’ shoulders were dropping, and his face was relaxing, as though – as though that was what he’d been expecting to hear. Or even what he’d been hoping to hear.

“Yes,” Cas said.

Dean felt his mouth fall slightly open and his eyes go wide, and he looked away.

He could feel his breath suddenly coming a little short. He tried to stand very still and be very quiet so that Cas wouldn’t see what that one-word answer had meant. How much it had shaken Dean.

It was only when he heard the yes that he realised just how little he’d expected to ever hear it.

Cas wanted to date. The hot rush in Dean’s chest was back, and the accompanying punch of guilt readied itself… but held back. Because Cas had said yes.

He’d said yes.

“Is that a surprise?” Cas said, his tone dry but not unkind. Dean swallowed, and managed a smile when he looked back over.

“Yeah,” he said.

“Oh.” Cas looked confused. “But… I told you…”

“I know.” Dean shrugged. “I didn’t know if you’d wanna do any of that crap, though. Human stuff.”

He saw something clear on Cas’ face, as though something that had been weighing on him had suddenly been lifted.

“Ah,” he said. “Well… I do. Want to.”

Dean nodded, once, a little sharply. God, he had no idea how to do this. And it didn’t help that he could feel things moving inside him, shifting, like walls crumbling, like stuff he’d smothered finally elbowing its way up to be felt – a blazing feeling, a hurting feeling, a wanting. Somehow both familiar and terrifying.

“Okay,” Dean managed aloud.

“As long as you still want to,” Cas said.

Still? Had Dean ever actually told Cas that he wanted to go on a date? Maybe he’d just been that obvious. Or maybe Cas had actually been able to guess what Dean wanted from the way Dean had said me too, Cas, even though Dean hadn’t been able to guess what Cas wanted in spite of literally being told I love you.

“Do you?” Cas asked, when Dean was silent for a second too long.

That wanting feeling, that hot tense ache that almost had Dean’s teeth gritting against it at this point, it was demanding a yes. It was saying go, go over there, what are you waiting for now? But Dean swallowed it. He couldn’t just have that. He couldn’t. Could he?

“Well,” he said. “I dunno. I mean. We are kinda old for it. Aren’t we?”

Dean watched Castiel consider it, his heart thudding.

“I’m fairly old,” Castiel said, “yes. But I think I’m still allowed to try new things.”

“New things,” Dean echoed.

“Yes.”

“Like… dating.”

“Yes,” Castiel said. “If you want to.”

“And like…” Dean went to say something else, and then stipped himself. Too many things all rushing to the front at once. Too many possibilities. Too many things that he’d given up thinking he could ever have. Too many things he’d told himself it was right that he didn’t have, because it’d be embarrassing if he did.

But now, here was Castiel, standing in front of him and saying he wanted to go on a date. Watching Dean quietly, waiting for him to finish what he’d started to say.

“Like…” Dean said, and then stopped again, and shook his head. “I don’t know, Cas. I’m not… you know.”

“You don’t want to?” Castiel said, the question spoken so neutrally that Dean knew it came with effort – Castiel’s muscles had to be heaving with holding that door open for Dean to leave through, if he wanted. But Castiel was still holding the door. Still saying, if you don’t want to, you don’t have to.

“No, I – yeah. I mean, I – yeah, I want to,” Dean said, saying the last part to the floor. His chest felt as though it was going to crack open. He wanted walk around the table between him and Cas, and drop to his knees, and just ask Cas with his eyes to touch him, anywhere, anyhow, gentle or not. “Just… I mean, look at us. Are we really gonna fit with any of that crap?”

He couldn’t imagine them trying to do the usual sweet romantic stuff. Dates and gifts and cards and flowers. So stupid after everything they’d been through, like sticking heart-shaped bows on the muzzles of two rusting guns.

“What kind of crap?” Castiel asked.

“You know. The whole schtick. Lovey-dovey crap.” Dean mumbled it, aware that even in describing it he sounded ridiculous. Lovey-dovey? Christ.

“I thought we could just try things out,” Castiel said. “And see if we can do them our way.”

“But what if it doesn’t work,” Dean said, making an attempt not to sound too wretched. He watched Castiel, waiting for him to give up, to say this was already too much work, that it wasn’t worth it, and they should just carry on going as they had been.

“Then we try something else,” Castiel said.

“Right,” Dean said, with an almost-laugh. “And we just do that over and over, huh.”

“If you’d like.”

“You’d seriously be okay with just keeping on trying forever?” He said it as if it were a joke.

“Yes,” Castiel said. “Of course.”

Dean went quiet. The expanse of the table between them was far, much too far. He stuck his hands in his pockets and nodded, because he didn’t know what else to do.

Cas saying that he’d keep trying forever was absurd. What was even more absurd was that Dean actually believed him. Cas had that look on his face, the one that allowed no argument, not angry or proud, just – sure. Certain.

If nothing they did together felt right, Cas would stick by him and keep trying new things. Forever.

Dean felt a part of himself breathe out, and with it went the last of the wall. Now Dean was immolating, standing still in the library of the bunker, just burning and burning with wanting to be touched by Cas, and –

As Dean watched, Cas’ jaw was tightening, as though he too were holding himself back against what he needed.

They stared at each other over the table. You first, Dean begged him silently. Please, just come here, just come here.

Cas’ blue eyes were locked with his, trying to say something Dean couldn’t hear.

“Cas,” Dean said, into the silence.

Cas watched him, waiting.

Dean’s mind was a blank. He didn’t know how to take this feeling, this all-encompassing burning wanting yearning feeling, and turn it into words. He didn’t know how to ask for what he wanted without accidentally putting it out of his own reach in the asking. He didn’t know how to want in the way that received, only in the way that was hopeless.

And Cas only looked at him and waited.

Dean opened his mouth.

“I don’t know,” he said. Cas’ expression flickered, but he didn’t move. “I – you – Cas, Jesus, I don’t know how to do this.”

“Do you want me to go?”

“No,” Dean said quickly, immediately.

“Do you want me to stay here?”

“Yeah. I mean…” Dean swallowed. “No.”

Now Cas looked confused.

“Do you want me to…” Cas paused, puzzling it out. Dean watched him thinking, if I shouldn’t go, and I shouldn’t stay, then…?

“Cas,” Dean said, “come here.”

Cas blinked, and Dean watched the slope of his shoulders change, watched the way Cas’ eyes lightened with a sudden hope. He watched Cas take a step around the table, and then another, slowly, as though afraid to scare Dean off.

Dean couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t speak. His hands were too big. He’d just asked Cas to come to him, and Cas was coming to him.

He couldn’t wait any longer. Dean moved, quickly, decisively, making for Cas as Cas came towards him, needing to be close and needing it now, and then – and then they were in front of each other in the bunker library, they were right in front of each other, standing with their hands by their sides and looking at each other. And all Dean could think as he looked at Cas was,

This is so heavy, it’s too much, it means too much.

And all Dean’s furiously thudding heart wanted was touch, anyway, no matter what it meant.

Cas reached up a hand, and gently – so gently – put it against Dean’s cheek.

Dean held his head up for a long moment, trying to keep himself together, keep it all in, be still, be silent. He gritted his teeth against the feeling in his chest, against the blazing of his happiness –

And then, he let go.

He closed his eyes, and breathed out. And leaned into the touch.

“I love you,” he heard Cas say.

“You shouldn’t.”

“I love you,” Cas said again, more determinedly, and Dean felt Cas’ forehead press to his own.

The touch of him was better than absolution. It was beautiful. It was perfect. Dean could feel the love of it running through him, easing the rusted gritty parts of him that had thought all this beyond him, and he wanted to gasp through the feeling of it like he was swimming through cold water. If he’d tried ten minutes ago to imagine Cas saying I love you to him again, Dean would have imagined it so sweet and unlike them. But this, this was happening. Cas’ forehead against Dean’s. Cas’ voice saying those words, I love you. And it felt real.

It felt like him, Dean, and it felt like Cas. This was who they were. This was how they loved each other.

“Me too,” Dean said. “Me too, Cas.”

He leaned forwards, and kissed Cas.

They didn’t go to the bar, in the end. They found they had enough to do without going out.

–––––

Dean

The next morning, in the kitchen, Dean turned to Cas and said casually,

“By the way, you never actually said. Are you up to date with the new research on the artifact? We should probably still try to find the damn thing.”

“Am I up to…”

Dean watched as Cas’ expression changed. It went from slight confusion, to sudden horror – and finally settled on a kind of dry acceptance.

“What?” Dean asked.

Cas came to stand by Dean, and because he could, Dean leaned forwards and kissed him again. His heart raced as he did it. Cas kissed him back, and Dean felt as though gravity probably shouldn’t be holding him down at this point.

“I, um,” Cas said. “When you texted me yesterday… I thought when you asked me that, you were asking me on a date.”

Dean’s brain took a second to catch up – and then he pressed his lips together to hold in a laugh. Cas tilted his head to one side.

“Don’t,” Cas said.

“I wouldn’t,” Dean said.

“Dean…”

“I’ll never mention it again.”

“I thought…” Cas closed his eyes, his head dropping as he smiled again at his own misunderstanding, and Dean let himself laugh. He reached out and put a hand on Cas’ shoulder, still a little tentative, still feeling his heart sing with the ability to touch. Cas leaned in, their bodies swaying together slightly.

“I love you,” Dean said, the words flowing up out of him like water from a spring, so easily, so naturally. He felt the immediate seize of panic afterwards, hearing those three words said in his own voice, out of his own mouth – but he couldn’t regret them, not when he saw Cas’ head lean back again, his blue eyes glowing with happiness.

“I love you,” Cas answered him. “I love you.”

[watercurseslyrics]

Ted and Jamie?

There’s something going on between Ted and Jamie. I’m not entirely sure what exactly, but the show keeps hinting at it, especially during Ted’s panic attacks. 

So to start, I understand that Ted sees himself as Jamie’s father figure. I understand that the way he sees Jamie probably reminds him of his son. But I think there is something more going on here that has yet to be revealed and No Weddings and a Funeral really confirmed that for me.

Let’s start with this Ted’s panic attack in S2E06:

During this scene, Ted is watching the game. The coaches have just given Jamie The Signal and we seem him play more aggressively. The commentators note that there is little time left in the game and Jamie is being carefully defended ever since he made that incredible goal. We see a few shots of Jamie playing aggressively. We see Ted notice this and then notice the crowd. He notices other players yelling and the crowd again and then notices his body is starting to react. When he fully realizes this we get two audio flashbacks. “You’re better than that Jamie!” yells Jamie’s dad in S1E10, the moment Ted (and the audience) knows that Jamie’s dad is tormenting his son, and then “Jamie Tartt?” which is Ted’s son when he meets Jamie in the locker room. 

Both of these clips are about Jamie, and Ted is watching Jamie when they occur. The “Jamie Tartt?” clip is interesting, because it’s a moment that connects Henry and Jamie. But to look at it further, Jason Sudeikis has spoken in multiple interviews about the role of guardian angels in the show. He often sites this moment, when Henry runs into the locker room right when Ted was going to lay it on Jamie as a moment of an angel stepping in and saving someone.

Maybe Ted feels guilt he didn’t step in for Jamie and instead walked away?

But! You will say, Ted didn’t just step away, he later gave Jamie the soldier, and that clearly meant a lot to Jamie (and might have been a better move than interrupting an extremely personal moment). I agree with you! But hey you know what’s weird? Let’s look at the shots that Ted flashes back to during No Weddings and a Funeral:

Hey um...how is Ted “remembering” that first shot? Because that’s Jamie holding the soldier on the bus at the end of Season 1. 

Okay okay, obviously this is TV and we’re not supposed to take this as Ted literally seeing a moment he wasn’t there for. Just like how the shot of him and Henry shows both of them, it’s supposed to indicate the memory of that moment rather than show Ted’s exact POV. So then, what is Ted’s memory of this moment with Jamie on the bus?

What did he imagine would happen when he gave it to Jamie? How did he think Jamie would feel? You might recall that Ted isn’t even the person to give the envelope to Jamie, Beard is. Why didn’t he do it himself? What did he feel then that he is remembering right now?

What is Ted’s relationship to Jamie? Why are his triggers closely tied between himself, Jamie, Jamie’s father, and his son? The simple answer is probably, “Well Ted’s worried about being a bad father, and Jamie’s relationship with his dad reminds Ted of his role as a father and also the role he used to play as a son to his dad, with whom he clearly has a lot of trauma.”

Still, the reason I think there is something more here is because the lack of interactions Ted has had with Jamie since he joined the team. Ted does not speak to Jamie much, and he hardly ever speaks about Jamie. We certainly haven’t seen him talk about the connection between Jamie and his panic attacks. I strongly believe we’re going to get a moment at some point that explicitly talks about this. Or something will happen and these moments are the clues that built up to it. 

TLDR: Ted’s panic attacks are closely linked with Jamie and we should look forward to the moment these two characters finally reconcile. 

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

What if post-books Edward gets implanted into twilight Edward's body? How would the story alter?

Oh, that’s a tough one, anon, very interesting question.

Well, we have a few things. One, this is an Edward who now knows that he will fall deeply in love with Bella Swan. Per Renesmee, he also has realized that vampires do in fact have souls and that, if all goes well, he will have the world’s most precious daughter in his life.

While I’m sure Edward’s extremely conflicted on making Bella a vampire he also wouldn’t want to wipe Renesmee out of existence. However, this is Edward we’re talking about, so he might very well convince himself that they’ll just do the Renesmee thing better this time.

Bella will get pregnant, they’ll make sure the C-section goes according to plan, and somehow Bella will miraculously stay human. (Does this make sense/is this possible? No. Will Edward desperately think this anyway like the lunatic that he is? Yes.)

However, Edward is a proper gentleman, which means he will not wed Bella before she’s at least eighteen and legal. Until then, he will court her, and revel in their romance.

Or he would, but first he’s got to hunt down and murder James, Victoria, and Laurent. It doesn’t matter that they have yet to even hear of this girl Bella Swan, their continued existence and future threat to Bella cannot be allowed (even though Edward could just as easily have Bella stay home from the fateful baseball game).

Edward doesn’t go to Biology that first day but instead leaves school to go find James, Victoria, and Laurent who he knows will be in the area within only a few weeks. He explains none of this to anyone, leaving everyone very confused nad anxious, Esme in particular is an absolute wreck.

In his mind, Bella is the Penelope to his Odysseus, waiting faithfully for his return no matter which suitors beat down her door. He forgets that this Bella has never met him, nor even seen him, before. When Bella gets the run down at lunch all the Cullens are pointed out to her and at the missing seat Jessica says, “Huh, I guess Edward’s sick, well, he’s the ginger whenever he gets back in.”

Because Edward is an awful tracker, he fails to find the three vampires, even in weeks of searching. He starts to get nervous, the day of the baseball game is fast approaching, will he really have to backtrack? Is he really going to allow Bella to be in that much danger?

Bella, meanwhile, has only noticed Edward as that guy who’s supposed to sit next to her in Biology but has been for a few weeks. According to rumor, he has mono (desperately fabricated by Carlisle who has no idea where the fuck Edward is or what’s even happening).

Bella’s vaguely intrigued by the sound of him, a very hot loner, but ultimately it’s of no interest to her.

Instead, it’s the mysterious Alice Cullen who draws her interest.

You see, Bella was nearly hit by a truck, but without Edward around Alice had to act herself and saved Bella. Bella now knows the beautiful, mysterious, Alice is not human and spends her time thinking about her mysterious savior.

Alice uncomfortably acknowledges that the girl who was supposed to be for Edward appears to be falling for her instead. She’s actually not all that conflicted by this, but it will make things a little awkward when Edward returns.

Bella flirts with Jake to get the Cold Ones story and figures out the Cullens are vampires, has a romantic Italian dinner with Alice when Alice saves her from almost being raped in Port Angeles, and Alice tries to tell Bella what an awesome guy this Edward that she’s never met is.

Seriously, he’s amazing, Bella will love him, Alice knows, she sees the future! Alice doesn’t invite Bella to the house or to baseball because she feels that’s Edward’s role. Except, Edward’s not answering her phone calls, and she’s getting increasingly antsy. HE’S RUINING EVERYTHING!

Edward shows up to the baseball game, guns blazing, and... Bella’s not there. The Cullens are having a nice game of baseball with James, Laurent, and Victoria.

Edward blurts out that James is the reason Alice is a vampire, sic him Jasper! Everyone continues to stare at Edward, but James is weirded out enough to attack, it’s an all out brawl but ultimately the Cullens win.

James, Laurent, and Victoria have been torn apart. Edward burns their bodies before anyone can even ask, much to Carlisle’s horror. Edward just tells them that it’s cool, Edward saw their thoughts and they were super evil.

How you been, family? Now, if you don’t mind, Edward’s going to see his wife.

Edward climbs through Bella’s window in the middle of the night and she reacts in terror. This vampire she doesn’t know has just climbed through her window in the middle of the night. She calls Alice in desperation and Alice has to explain, through a very strained smile, that no worries this is Edward. Yes, the Edward, Bella will just adore him. Alice sees the future.

Bella’s not feeling the love and Edward realizes something has gone wrong.

He was so certain of Bella’s love, it’s so fundamental to him, that he had forgotten there was ever a point where she didn’t know him. He was born loving Bella Swan and he assumed she’d be the same. But this Bella has no idea who he is, he’s an utter stranger to her, and in the mean time it seems she’s been buddying up to Alice.

Edward asks her “What the hell, Alice?” And Alice tries desperately to defend herself AND YOU WERE GONE FOR WEEKS, EDWARD. 

Edward has a crisis much like he did in Eclipse, everything’s out of his control and he doesn’t like it one bit. He forbids Jasper from spending any second ever near Bella for fear of another New Moon disaster. Now that James and Victoria are eliminated Edward debates leaving Bella while she’s human again, the only thing stopping him from giving it a third try is Renesmee, he can’t have his daughter not existing.

Which means he spends the time between then and Bella’s 18th birthday being insufferable. Worse is that Bella thinks he’s a weird creep.

He’s no longer charming, he’s aggressive, wanting her to be in love with him right this second and blaming her when she isn’t. And for all Alice’s assurances, she doesn’t like this guy sneaking into her room at night and staring at her nor does she like the idea that she’s doomed to fall in love whether she likes it or not. Bella sticks to Alice like glue and avoids Edward whenever possible.

Bella’s eighteenth birthday comes and, rather than having a party, Edward kidnaps Bella to a church. Congratulations, we’re getting married, then we will have sex and you will give birth to my beautiful half-vampire daughter. Don’t worry, you’ll stay human.

Bella bolts out of the car screaming at the top of her lungs, calling desperately for Alice, who cannot believe Edward fucked up this badly. Edward utterly panics, having no idea what has gone wrong, but having the sinking feeling that he’s ruined everything.

He begs Bella to take him back, but every time she sees him she starts screaming in terror.

After Bella graduates, the question comes up if Bella should be turned and continue to be involved with the family. Alice insists that it will happen if they like it or not, I imagine the family tries to separate, but Edward refuses to now that Bella’s so close to leaving him. He can’t leave until he’s certain she loves him. Eventually, an accident happens in which one of them attacks Bella and she gets seriously injured, it’s simply a matter of time. Bella is then turned.

She ends up dating Alice, Jasper not sure if he’s even married to Alice anymore, and Edward never forgives Alice who he blames for all of this. Because it’s certainly not his fault.

[euphoricsunflowers]

nervous — son hyunwoo/shownu

a/n: sorry it’s been a while since i released anything :,( but i hope you like this!! pls enjoy me being so helplessly in love with shownu <3

word count: 1.6k

content: sub!shownu, dom!fem!reader (not she/her pronouns but afab!), honestly very light dom/sub roles but they are still there, pegging, fingering (m receiving), handjobs(m receiving), edging (very soft tho), not really an aftercare scene but they talk at the end, mention of eating at the end

summary: shownu finally lets you peg him and he can’t help loving it.

(gif by @imnameimss)

he was nervous. you can tell by the way he watches you like a hawk and lies dead still just how nervous he was. you both lie on his bed with you straddling his hips, and you rub your hand on his shoulder to soothe his nerves, “woo, baby, we don’t have to do this if you’re not comfortable with it.”

“no. no, i wanna do it. i wanna do it for you,” he mutters, “you’re always so receptive to the things i want, i want to do the same.”

“but you’ll tell me if you’re at all uncomfortable, right? the last thing i’d want is to make you endure and suffer in silence just to please me, okay?” his eyes soften with your words, and he nods silently, “words, woo, please.”

“i promise i’ll tell you if it’s too much or if i’m uncomfortable, i promise,” he assures, holding your hand as he smiles up at you.

you had asked to peg him a while ago, and back then, he never would have imagined himself saying yes. he didn’t have any problem with not being in control, but he wasn’t exactly enthusiastic about the idea of something in his ass at the time.

but now? he wanted it more than anything. so, of course, he was nervous, but seeing that gleeful smile on your face when he shyly said you could give it a shot if you still wanted to makes the whole experience worth it.

and now you straddle him, leaning down to press kisses to his soft, doll-like lips. he’s always fascinated by your obsession with his lips, but he’s not against the kisses so rough that they bruise his lips and he’s sure by the way you stare at them even more that you’re not either.

eventually, you finally start to press kisses to his jaw, leaving the room to be filled with the sounds of your lips against his skin and his heavy breaths, “baby,” he murmurs, “don’t tease me, please.”

he hears you giggle softly as you come up from kissing his neck, “sorry, angel. do you want me to touch you a little bit before we get into the main event?”

“i- yeah, please,” he murmurs, and you adjust yourself to his side as you run your fingers against his length faintly. not enough to pull a strong reaction out of him, but enough for him to feel it. your hand wraps around his cock as you start to move your hand up and down, and finally, you start to hear those incredibly soft, breathy moans that you love to hear.

“do you like that, baby?” you ask, smiling as he groans out a soft ‘yes, thank you’, always so polite when he’s in this submissive role. you continue the same motions a bit more firmly as his eyes flutter closed at the sweet feeling of your touch.

he groans softly, “i’m close,” and that’s when you slow your hand down, leaving him clueless as to why he was being edged, “wait! please, i was so-”

“shh, i know you wanna cum, but you’re gonna feel so, so good soon, angel. you just gotta trust me,” you whisper, “i’m gonna put some lube on my fingers, and i’m gonna prep you a little bit. is that okay?”

“yeah, that’s… fine. just go slow, please?”

“of course, woo,” you murmur with a kiss to his forehead as you rub the cold lube against your fingers to warm it slightly, adjusting yourself once more to be between his legs, “okay, i’m just gonna start with one. if at any moment you’re uncomfortable, tell me and we can stop.”

he nods, and you press a finger against his hole, barely entering the first knuckle before you stop to let him get used to it, “o-oh, that feels- that feel really weird.”

“like bad weird?”

“like weird weird, it’s not bad, just weird,” he says, biting his pretty bottom lip as you start to wiggle your finger just a bit, slowly sliding in the next knuckle. he doesn’t seem to be in any pain, but you still wait a moment before making the same small circular motions with your finger.

“tell me how it feels, woo,” you murmur.

“it’s feels oddly good, but still really weird,” he breathes, starting to wiggle his hips to feel a bit more now that he’s a bit more comfortable with the feeling, “can you- can you add more?”

“of course,” you press a second finger in, and for a moment he regrets asking, but the discomfort doesn’t last too long, and soon enough he finds himself moving his hips around like before.

“more, please,”

you smile, “i’m really happy you’re liking this, woo. you’re doing so well,” you start to move your fingers a bit faster and a bit more intensely, and he lets out his first real and loud moan of the night, his hand almost moving to cover his mouth, but he doesn’t stop himself. his cheeks flush slightly, but he knows you like how he sounds. as much as it makes him shy, he wants to please you more, “you’re adorable, my sweet boy.”

“please,” he groans all flustered, “can you, uhm- can you do it now?”

as much as you were absoutely ready to fuck him till he realizes just how amazing it feels, you couldn’t help teasing him just a bit, “mmmh, do what, baby? what do you want me to do?”

“please fuck me now,” he murmurs, and he’s just too sweet not to give in to.

“alright, angel, sit tight,” you pull your fingers out of him and get the strap on ready as he sits with all those nerves, so nervous but you seem so in your element that he doesn’t want to stop now. he wants to experience this.

though, a moment before you go for it, you still ask one last time, “and you’re sure you still want this?”

“yes, please,” he pleads, and you take a breath before going for it. you push in slowly, panicking slightly at the way his face scrunches up a bit, but he doesn’t say anything.

“woo? are you alright?”

he stutters like he doesn’t even know himself, “i- uh, yeah, please just- give me a minute.”

“of course, baby. let me know when you’re feeling more comfortable,” you murmur as you press a kiss to his palm, holding his hand while he adjusts to the new feeling.

moments pass, when finally he mutters a small, “can i try something?” and you nod. he does the same movement with his hips that he did before, but this time he gasps. it worries you for a second, but he groans, “oh my god, that feels- fuck, that feels good. can you move now?” you respond by pulling out just a bit just to push back in with a bit of force, “oh fuck, keep doing that. please, that’s so good.”

you fuck him rather gently by your standards, but he feels so alive, like every nerve in his body is lit on fire, it’s so overwhelming. it’s still just so much, and he can’t help but wonder how it can even get better than this.

and then your strap brushes his prostate on one of your thrusts, and he quite literally cries out, moaning loudly.

initially you thought you were being too aggressive too quickly, and so you slow down to ask, “are you okay? did that hurt?” but he shakes his head, running his fingers through his hair.

“i don’t know what that was, but god that felt good,” and that makes you realize what really happened, and you make a point to try and hit that spot again the way you did it by accident, drawing even more loud and almost pornographic moans out of him.

his voice is so beautiful and you never get to hear it this intensely. usually it’s all so soft and under his breath, but you’re getting all of him now, and now that you have it you’ll never want to give it up.

“i- fuck i’m already so close,” he cries out.

“you can cum whenever you want, baby,” you murmur, keeping a strong pace as you use your free hand touch his aching cock to hopefully push him over the edge, and it does. he reaches up to grab your shoulders, wrapping his legs around you as his back arches and he throws his head back in utter ecstasy.

he doesn’t moan out as it hits him. in fact, he’s left so breathless as the pleasure overwhelms him that his eyes roll back in probably the most beautiful way, though he does moan as you pound into him and jerk him off through the orgasm, and quite loudly at that.

after it seems to subside, you pull out gently, and he falls back against the bed, “that was-“ he mutters, still struggling to find the words and to catch his breath, “that was incredible.”

“yeah? i’m glad you thought it was, angel. you did so well. let’s clean up, okay?”

“...can we eat first?”

you chuckle, only happiness in your heart as you gaze at him, messy hair and covered in sweat and cum. even though just looking at him makes you want so much more from him (god you want nothing more to use this beauty for your own pleasure) that’s for a different time, because today was about him. “after, sweetheart, i promise.”

—

taglist: @lovingonrepeat @neosincity @sub-hoshi-enthusiast @maknaeronix @multidreams-and-desires @foenixs @hobilluvvr @vanillaknj @yr-domxfantasies @treasure-hwa @fleurshopsub @rubyscloud9 @silencefavarchive @nct99 @bigkpopstan @monstaxdirtywonk @rosiethefairy and always feel free to ask to be added to/removed from the taglist <3

[obeiii-mee]

So, I finally finished part 2 for the original ask. I’ve had a bit of trouble with writing the twins because I think this would affect them particularly bad. I hope you enjoy all this angst, cuz I sure as hell didn’t im fucking sobbing alright?

Pt. 1

Enjoy!

————————————-

The Brothers Reacting to MC sacrificing themselves to bring Lilith back, Part 2:

Satan:

-Satan felt like the stupidest demon in DevilDom. He was supposed to be the intellectual, the logical one, the one with more than a few spare brain cells to work with. And yet he never twigged there was anything going on with you. The signs were all there. You had asked him for very specific book recommendations for the past few weeks, about the Celestial Realm and the full power of souls. He even let you borrow some from his own collection without giving it a second thought!

-In hindsight, your goal was very obvious but at the time, he hadn’t even stopped for a second to consider it. It just didn’t seem like something you would be capable of doing. But you did. Of course you did. You were the most driven human he had even met. You managed to live for a full year with seven of the most dangerous demons in hell and make pacts with them no less, so anything is fair game when it comes to you.

-Lucifer and Lilith found him in the library, like usual, reading what seemed to be a very graphic book on different wars that took place in the human realm over the centuries. What can I say, the man wanted to know more human history for your sake. He was one of the few brothers who hadn’t even noticed you were missing and never thought anything was amiss. Sure, he missed your presence but the cynical fourth born isn’t exactly paranoid.

-Now, if it was Lucifer alone that had come to check up on him, Satan would have been very tempted to just ignore him. But obviously he noticed a slightly smaller, less threatening figure next to him and he forced himself to look up from his book. Lowkey hoping it was you because he often complained his brothers got to spend way too much time with you. Satan and Lilith technically never met, face to face. However, I like to think that since Satan was born out of Lucifer’s wrath, he has a small connection with his memories and therefore Lilith. After all, Satan was the only one that never participated in the war or actually fell down as angel.

-He never met her before. Yet he immediately recognised her as she came in. She had every trait you would expect an angel to have. Except she wasn’t an angel anymore of course. She was dead. Or at least supposed to be. Lucifer just stood in the doorway as she approached him. Lilith fidgeted in front of him as she tried to come up with the right words to introduce herself.

-“I’m really happy to actually-“

-She didn’t get to finish because Satan had embraced her almost immediately, almost like he was on auto mode and couldn’t help himself otherwise. She welcome the gesture, glad their first meeting wasn’t as awkward as she had predicted it would be. The eldest brother was watching, slightly in awe because, as far as he knew, the only person he had ever hugged before this was you.

-Of course, the spell had to be broken. Lucifer knew better than to step in and allowed his sister to explain. Satan was going to have a bad reaction nonetheless, but he might become even more aggressive if it was him delivering the news. Lilith never had to deal with this particular brother of hers or any of his fits but somehow, it was like she knew what to do.

- Their sister did her best to explain it to Satan as calmly as possible, as if that would make much of a difference. Satan remained oddly quiet throughout all of it, showing no reaction besides a neutral one. Lucifer found this strange. Yeah, his brother/son was usually the silent type, the sort of demon to think, not speak. But he expected some sort of emotion in there. Anything, really. Anger definitely. Maybe sorrow and misery. But not this.

-Lilith noticed the shaking before even Satan did. His body had just started convulsing on its own as he processed the idea of you laying there, unmoving and cold; dead. He involuntarily clenched his fists and he had to sit down before his legs gave over. Lucifer was still outright confused while Lilith struggled to soothe her brother. He hated feeling like this. All vulnerable and weak, like the skies of hell will fall on him and crush him. He was Satan for fuck’s sake. He was probably considered the most fearful creature in all of existence. He shouldn’t be feeling like this.

-But of course he did. You were always able to do that to him, bringing out that soft side of him he never knew he had. Or at least refused to acknowledge he had. The funny thing was, since you were the one being subjected to that side of his, he didn’t mind. Because you are MC, a literal ball of sunshine. Nothing him and his brothers deserved but you were still willing to spend time with them. The least they could have done was to protect you.

-They couldn’t even do that

-He couldn’t even do that

-Satan is even more retreated now than before, more hostile toward his own brothers and basically everyone else. He will snap at anyone for very minor reasons and lock himself up in the library even more than usual. Anything to get his mind off how much he must have disappointed you. It hurts too much to even hear your name being spoken. God forbid they choose another human to come down there as an exchange student because he will unleash all of his wrath on them on your behalf. How dare some lowly human try to replace you? He’s more prone to fits of anger now too. Long gone is his self control and calmness.

-The one person that understood him was dead. The one person he allowed himself to be close to and genuinely kind to was gone forever. Satan will never get over this. Or the fact that you were smiling so brightly before you died.

Asmo:

-He’s just so sick of it. So so so sick of it. So sick of watching everyone he cares about either die or get taken away from him. If he was a mortal he would have probably gone crazy. Maybe he already reached insanity and just didn’t realise it. After all, everyone has a breaking point, even demons. And once you go beyond that point, your whole world will shatter.

-To him, it seems almost impossible that just that morning he had seen you at breakfast, laughing along with his brothers and overall just being the intriguing, silly human you were. You were right there! Right in front of him, talking to him like it was any other day. And now he has to deal with the unbearable fact that he will never hear your voice again.

-Asmo was out, hanging out at the Fall as usual, when he realised he had missed several, frantic calls from Mammon, who at that point wasn’t aware that you were long dead.

-He brushed him off, initially, thinking his brother was just having another one of his melodramatic moments. So the fifth born went around Majolish, basically buying everything he could get his hands on to ignore the uneasiness creeping up on him. He could feel something bad was happening. He just didn’t know what.

-At this point, he was a bit unsettled which is very unlike him. He is pretty optimistic as a whole so seeing him so startled and on alert was a sort of disturbing sight to see. Lucifer called him after lunch and told him to come home. Normally, Asmo wouldn’t have taken his older brother’s words too seriously but hearing his strained voice on the other side of the phone forced him into action.

-He rushed home, faster then he had ever done before., because let’s be honest, he prefers being outside of the house more often than not. He searched for you everywhere, but you were nowhere to be found. However, he bumped into Lucifer and Lilith in the middle of the upstair’s corridor in his frantic search for you.

-Unlike his brothers, Asmo noticed Lilith immediately, way before he even acknowledged his brother. It was such a shock to him that he thought for sure that he was hallucinating, though things like that never happened to him beforehand. Asmo stopped breathing for what felt like centuries because he didn’t want to raise his expectations, he didn’t to be disappointed if Lilith truly wasn’t there and he was just making her up. He didn’t want to deal with the grief once again.

-However, Lilith remained exactly where she was and flashed him one of her brilliant, warm smiles that he had loved so much back in the Celestial Realm. That he, on more than one occasion, tried to copy because he wanted to have as much in common with Lilith as possible. He wasn’t imagining her and the moment he realised this, he threw himself at her, the worry of his hair being ruined long forgotten and now his only concern was that she would dissipate in thin air.

-Lilith did not yield and embraced her brother, she gave enough hugs today to last her a lifetime but she couldn’t be happier to see her beloved brothers again. It took every ounce of strength on Lilith’a part not to burst into tears from both joy and sorrow.

-Lucifer hated this. He hated having to cut in the happy moment and lay down the bad news. But he had do it. Because no one else would. He was the eldest. He was responsible for everyone. A sadist he may very well be, but it absolutely destroys him to see his brothers suffering from such extreme distress. He told Asmo everything as bluntly as he could, thinking that ripping the bandaid straight off would result in a better outcome.

-It did not.

-Mammon’s reaction to your death was expected, but Asmo’s took both Lilith and Lucifer by surprise. They didn’t expect him to be as emotional as he ended up being and both of them handled it awkwardly because the Avatar of Lust was usually such a confident and admirable creature, it felt weird to see him act in such a way. He fell to his knees in a moment of pure despair and cried enough tears to drown himself in them later. He sobbed for a long time and did not stop immediately, instead going through several stages of weeping, from hiccuping to panting and then back to crying. It was an endless cycle of sadness.

-Lilith half carried half dragged him to his bedroom, while her other brother watched, a bit mesmerised. Asmo usually loved having company and now that his sister was back, he 100% needed it but at the same time, he wished to remain alone for a while. It would be painful but he needed to gather his feelings in one place before he could even put together a conclusion on how he was feeling. So they both left and with the door closed, all the air seemed to suffocate him and drag him into endless despair.

-Asmo received a lot of damage from your death, changing his personality very abruptly. Compared to his brothers, his change in attitude is not so subtle and now he basically hates anything that reminds him of you. He no longer enjoys hanging out or clubbing at the Fall or even go shopping anymore unless it’s necessary because those were things he used to do with you! And now, they seemed so pointless he often wondered what was the point of actually doing it. The only sort of satisfaction he gets is being in your room because if he closes his eyes, just for a moment, he can pretend you’re still there with him, whispering words of comfort to him.

-Yes, he still has one night stands and tries to seduce people left and right but it’s a sort of distraction more than anything else. He doesn’t do it out of need anymore, but out of desperation to get you out of his head. He’s also been sneaking to the Human Realm a lot as of late, as if hoping to randomly bump into you up even though it’s not possible and he knows it. He’s just torturing himself further. Hopeless. Just hopeless.

-You made him feel so much more than just Lust. And now that he had you, even if it was for just a short amount of time, Asmo knew he would never feel that way to anyone ever again. He would never fall in love with anyone ever again.

-He knew the risks of getting attached to a human. He knew how much he would suffer in the end. After all, humans are mortals, they are not destined to live for long. And yet he went and did it anyway because you were too amazing to ignore. You gave him something he never realised he yearned for and you left before he could reciprocate.

The Twins:

-Neither Lilith nor Lucifer was surprised to find the two of them together, relaxing in the attic. It’s common knowledge at this point that the twins have a hard time being separated. And especially more so than before after the whole attic incident, which concluded with them refusing to leave each other’s side. Usually, you were with them too, of course, for good measure. Obviously, they weren’t able to find you anywhere like everyone else. Belphie got tired of searching and just suggested that they go upstairs and that eventually you’ll joking them.

-Lucifer was, understandably, extremely worried at how the twins would react to all of this. Just seeing their adored sister in the same room as them would be more than enough to cause them to malfunction. But if he let them know that you died mere hours ago? And for smuggling Lilith’s soul back into existence no less? It would be chaos. At least with his other brothers, their reactions he could more or less predict. But the twins were slightly different. Especially Belphie. You can never really tell what goes on inside his head.

-Beel noticed his sister before Belphie did. He was so taken aback, he tumbled backwards and off the bed, accidentally dragging his twin with him. It was quite a comical fall actually. Lilith would’ve laughed if it wasn’t for the circumstances. She missed them, of course. Truth is, she missed all of her brothers and their memories back in the Celestial Realm. It always hurt so much to think that she could see them but never really interact with any of them. Except through you since you were heir in a way.

-Beel was a mess, first of all. You can easily imagine the distress he was in at the sight of his little sister. His dead little sister. Dead because of him. It might’ve been centuries since Lilith fell from the heavens and got transformed into a human but he continued to carry that burden with him because how could he not? He should’ve been able to save both Lilith and Belphie even though, logistically speaking, it would’ve been impossible. He saw the despair in her eyes right before she disappeared below the clouds. That image had and will haunt him for the rest of his eternal days.

-He was on his knees before her in a split second, grabbing the hems of her sleeves and sobbing into them as if the whole of DevilDom was about to crash down on all of them. Beel was yelling incoherently, switching between begging for forgiveness and stuttering mid sentence, unable to get the rights words out. The whole mansion was filled with his distraught weeping and he just couldn’t stop.

-His sister knelt down and embraced him, almost awkwardly because of the position they were in, as she began crying as well. Out of exhaustion more than anything. She’s dealt with so many breakdowns in one day that she couldn’t handle holding her emotions in anymore. With the death of her descendant and the sorrow of her brothers, she wished from the bottom of her heart she had just stayed dead because everything would have turned out alright that way.

-Belphie was more cautious. He stood at the back of the room, watching as his sister hugged Beel and sort of held him in a way that would quieten him down. Careful. He casted Lucifer a glance, as if to ask “what the hell is going on?” before once again staring at the ridiculous sight before him. Usually, he wasn’t one to look to his eldest brother for help. There was some dangerous hatred he harboured for him deep in his heart after all. But he was so confused and conflicted, he couldn’t fight the urge to seek guidance from him.

-Lucifer didn’t know how long it had been since he last saw his youngest brother be that openly vulnerable. It felt like an eternity now, to be honest. He was like a rock hard, clamped sea shell since their fall as angels. He walked over to him and placed his hand on Belphie’s shoulder. For the first time in millenniums, his brother didn’t try to swat it away.

-“Lilith is back.”

-That was all he needed. Those three words. As soon as Lucifer finished his sentence, he ran straight into his siblings who were still crying on the floor. He almost bulldozed them over if it wasn’t for Beel’s strength. The youngest landed on top of them, almost starting to cry as well. Beel, seemingly tired himself out so much that he went a bit limp in Lilith’s arms, still gripping onto her for dear life as if she were on the verge of disappearing again.

-“MC is dead.”

-It was a horribly timed moment to drop that bomb in, to be fair. Lucifer tried saying it as casually as he could but he could hear his own voice crack and see his own hands tremble. His mind was focused but his body had betrayed him. The twins were so into the moment, so glad to see their sister after all this time, it was almost like they didn’t hear him. So he repeated the statement, this time in a more composed manner. Belphie immediately reacted. He got off his siblings and straightened his back, glaring at Lucifer in shock from the other side of the room. Beel stayed where he was, but craned his neck to gawk at Lucifer, who was standing solemnly, waiting for the predicted chaos. Lilith closed her eyes and winced.

-Beel was in outright denial which was surprising. He wouldn’t, or rather refused, to accept that you could be dead. I mean, the idea itself was propestrous, right? You’ve almost died once and you managed to outdo death. Or more accurately, your future self did. You could do it again, couldn’t you? Just the image of you laying dead somewhere was enough to send him in panic and another, this time almost silent, meltdown. He seized fistfuls of his hair and pulled, as a method of escaping the pain that came with the thoughts of you and death being correlated in any way. If Lilith’s death wasn’t enough to push him over the edge, this sure as hell was. Could demons go insane? Probably. Beel certainly felt like he was. Even with Lilith there comforting him, he had the impression he couldn’t stand or even look up from the floor.

-Belphie didn’t make a move to aid his brother or help his sister. He stood, teeth gritted and jaw clenched, staring at his oldest brother with an odd gleam in his eyes. For a few moments, he was motionless. Then, he turned on his heel and marched out of the attic, slamming the door behind him so hard that the whole room shook. Lucifer didn’t try to stop him. It would be meaningless anyway. He wouldn’t listen to him. And his sister was still occupied with Beel, who kept mumbling with tears trailing down his cheeks about everything being his fault and not being there when he should have.

-The twins did not even go through the same stages of mourning their brothers did. Beel was dealing with the grief of someone incredibly close to him by eating even more than he normally would, causing his siblings quite a bit of concern. But they couldn’t argue much. He was the epitome of gluttony in the end. Belphie didn’t change much in terms of his daily activities. He slept as much as he could during the day. And at night, he stargazed as he always did. But more bitterly than usual, despising the fact that he wasn’t going to enjoy another starry night with you ever again. He didn’t blame you for dying. He was angry you left and to do something so stupid as bringing Lilith back in return for your lost soul. He was angry you couldn’t be selfish for once and let yourself be happy with them.

-He was angry at Mammon too. He learned he was supposed to be with you earlier that day. He wasn’t. And now the two aren’t speaking. For some reason, he is slightly upset with Lucifer too but that is only because he was the one who delivered the sad news. But most of all, he was very furious with himself. Because he promised that he would never let anything happen to you again after the whole choking incident. He swore on his honour as a demon to protect you and he couldn’t.

-Don’t tell him they’re bringing another exchange student in. He will kill them. He 100% will kill them. He doesn’t want to replace you. And neither does Beel. He would probably eat the new student within a few minutes. But it would take a while until all of that is sorted out. After all, even Diavolo himself is bound to be mourning in his own way. Not like you were meant to know, but you were definitely the favourite child exchange student.

-It wasn’t fair you had to leave. It wasn’t fair that you didn’t even get to say goodbye. It wasn’t fair that the three of you couldn’t spend more time together. Beel won’t be able to ever taste your cooking again and Belphie won’t have anyone to cuddle with in the morning and be generally lazy with. And again, they had even more of a reason to curse their father for ruining the one good thing that’s happened to them since their glory days as angels.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-The 7 brothers will continue to grieve your death for the rest of eternity, be assured. Their sister just as much of course. And at some point, the whole of DevilDom had to in a way as the prince himself wasn’t his usual, peppy self. At least Lilith’s presence had a calming effect on them but not one that could compare to the trauma of knowing you were truly gone. They would wait and with time, there will be healing.

-Except time doesn’t heal anyone’s wounds. It just teaches them how to deal with the pain.

——————————————————————-

This took so much longer than planned, Jesus Christ! I guess I was really unhappy with it at some point and gave up, then sort of rewrote it which took a while. And now it’s done! I’m sort of proud on how it turned out. A bit cliche but I feel like it created the right atmosphere. Also, the last quote above is a favourite of mine that I thought would be a good idea to add in.

The twins are joined because I thought it would not only save time but also make more sense since the two are together almost all the time. Hope no one is upset I didn’t do the twins separately, it would’ve taken even longer then!

To add, 1,080 followers???? Wtf, I haven’t even posted anything in a while, thank you so much! You’re all too nice istg.

@doggonudez asked me to tag them in this post, so I hope this actually works lmao.

Al~

[isaacthedruid]

Please allow me to tell you about one of my favourite cartoons through this informal essay I did for school a couple of months back. 

Gravity Falls and How it Did The Unimaginable

**SPOILERS... KINDA**

The 2010s saw the creation of some of the most iconic animated tv shows ever made, the likes of Adventure Time (2010), Steven Universe (2013), Over the Garden Wall (2014) and The Legend of Korra (2012). To explain why this era’s shows are so admirable is honestly rather difficult. Yet, there are many factors that can be taken into consideration when looking for an answer.

The past decade was very successful in perfecting their craft and utilizing the animated format to their favour, creating some of the wackiest and fascinating cartoons ever made. With the advancements made in both 2D and 3D animation for film, this bled into the world of TV as well.

To mention that 2010s cartoons have stunning visuals would be an understatement. Everything about the animation was beautiful; the strong colour palettes, the clean and imaginative character designs, the colourful and immersive backgrounds and especially the mesmerizing worlds that can be found within episodes that are half an hour.

This era’s cartoons also led to a massive shift in storytelling, writing longer-running stories that spread out across seasons while also swapping out episodic adventures for serialization. This heavily aided in the popularization of these shows, due to the rise of internet fandoms and dropping the taboo that cartoons were only for kids. Many shows acknowledged their older viewers by leaving clues and even puzzles to be solved by the theorists who have a large appearance on social media platforms like Reddit, Twitter and Tumblr. As the shows progressed, their fandoms created many theories for what they believed might happen within their favourite series. The top three shows from this era all utilized these changes, being at the forefront of the shift and helping guide the creative vision of 2010s cartoons.

Often regarded as many people’s favourite cartoon, Gravity Falls presented one of the best mysteries of the decade with two seasons and only 40 episodes. Inspired by Twin Peaks and The X-Files, it’s considered as the kids’ version of these two iconic shows as this cartoon acts as many people’s first introduction to horror through bright colours and fun characters.

This series follows the adventures of Dipper and Mabel Pines, twins, who are sent to spend their summer with their great-uncle or Grunkle Stan in Gravity Falls, Oregon. This town is full of oddities like supernatural creatures, insane and eccentric inhabitants, and many puzzles. The Pines twins must adjust to the weirdness while uncovering the mysteries and protecting their new town.

While living in Gravity Falls, the twins are forced to work in the Mystery Shack, a tourist trap created by their Grunkle Stan that overcharges unlucky tourists, teaching about fake monsters despite there being real creatures all over town. On his first day in Oregon, Dipper accidentally came across a mysterious journal written by an unknown author that explains all the oddities to be found in this strange town. This book acts like an encyclopedic of the Weird for Dipper, an inquisitive 12-year-old kid who seeks answers.

Dipper is an extremely intelligent kid, his brain being far more developed than his body. He’s rather awkward and self-conscious as he often stumbles over his words or gets embarrassed trying to talk to girls. Despite this, the boy is an adventurer at heart who just wants to grow up and skip his upcoming teenage years.

While Mabel is quite the opposite in many ways, she is loud and has an in-your-face personality. Mabel is bouncy and fun, she is so excited to start high school. She is easily excitable and for the larger part of the series, she is in her boy-crazy phase. Mabel is a girly-girl as she likes all things; glitter, unicorns, rainbows, partying and crafting. Yet, she doesn’t often compare well with many of the other girls in town, they see her as weird and “too much”.

(In all fairness through, it is not too kind to either of the characters as their personalities are more complex than just awkward nerd and artsy girl-girly.)

Dipper and Mabel’s personalities are very different but somehow, they—along with their Gravity Falls family—manage to solve mysteries and save the town, multiple times.

Gravity Falls is an honestly genius series that completely changed the way cartoons were made. Originally when writing a series, you’d create a base of your story; characters, the universe and a basic plot. Yet, when creator, Alex Hirsch (who was in his early/mid-20)s and his small team first began constructing their show, they planned out everything they could possibly think of for the first season. Additionally, outlining some answers for their biggest mysteries that would be answered at the end of the series.

Despite being rated TV-Y7, this series really pushed the boundaries of kids’ television. From the teeth being ripped out of a deer’s mouth by a demon, rearranging the functions of every hole on a man’s face to an aggressive pop-rock sock puppet show that ended in a dramatic slow-motion scene of the puppets burning. Gravity Falls wasn’t afraid to get a little weird or creepy. Or create some genuine nightmare fuel. 

From the beginning, Gravity Falls had built a mystery into its series, hiding secrets and clues all throughout the show. Most notably were the backwards-recorded message and cryptograms, using roughly nine different kinds, even creating two of their own.

The inclusion of cyphers and mysteries for fans to solve is possibly the reason why this series was so successful. As one of the first shows to do something like this, Gravity Falls used social media and internet fandoms to its advantage.

As mentioned earlier, cartoon fans have quite a presence on social media platforms like Twitter and Tumblr. They create theories and share fun ideas about their favourite shows. Viewers of Adventure Time, Gravity Falls and Steven Universe were all included in their share of theory fun.

Sometimes, fan theories end up being correct but when you’re Gravity Falls creator, Alex Hirsch, you don’t just watch from the sidelines as your viewers figure out the biggest mystery of your show. No, you create a hoax to get your viewers off your trail and that is what he did. Around 2013, only halfway through the first season of the show, viewers had started to follow the clues, theorizing who was the author is Dipper’s mysterious journal.

Unfortunately for the Gravity Falls production crew, the viewers were right— for the sake of readers who have never seen the show, I will not mention who the author was as it would be the biggest spoiler.

In 2013, a supposed leaked image of a tv showing a younger version of the show’s crazy old man character, Old Man McGucket, writing in the infamous journal was uploaded anonymously (by Alex Hirsch) to 4Chan.

Despite the image only being on up for a few hours, it spread like wildfire. Much to the team’s success, theorists stopped searching for the answer to “who is the author” and just accepted the image of McGucket as the truth.

To further push the fake-out, three words were posted to Alex’s Twitter, “fuming right now.”

The tweet was deleted a few minutes later and fans genuinely believed that someone from the Gravity Falls team had leaked the most important part of the story.

While doing research, I came across a Reddit post from April 10th, 2013, the day after ‘leak,’ Alex’s tweet was uploaded. In this post, user, TheoDW uploaded an image of Alex’s tweet with the caption, “It seems that Hirsch got mad at last night’s leak. He already deleted this tweet.”

Seeing the reactions of these Redditors in 2013 is kind of weird and crazy to look at. “He has every right to be upset. Someone internally released a plot revealing screen shot of series breaking spoiler information,” a deleted Reddit account commented.

“This is Alex Hirsch’s biggest success by far, he spent a huge amount of time carefully planning out the series, and then in a moment someone releases a major spoiler. It would make anyone upset,” the user, Time_Loop commented.

“Seriously, this is a nightmare for a storyteller, and shows a breach of trust. I feel so bad for him–honestly, I hope whoever did the leak gets caught and appropriate action is taken. You don’t f–k with someone’s story like this. It’s unprofessional.” the user, lonelybeloved angrily commented.

In 2014, this ‘leak’ was finally disproven when viewers were given an episode on McGucket’s backstory and an amazing tweet from Alex Hirsch. 

Alex had post an image of himself playfully pointing at a monitor with the supposed leaked picture with the caption, “1) Make hoax  2) Upload to 4Chan  3) Post angry tweet about "leak" 4) Delete tweet 5) Let internet do rest”

It is so interesting to look at these comments know that all of this was orchestrated by Alex.

I wish I had been old enough at the time to follow theories and fandom stuff like I do now with current cartoons but really looking at this from an outside perspective, this was insane!

The real author wasn’t revealed until 2015 and when viewers first got the answer to this biggest show on their screens, they must have freaked out!

Following the finale in 2016, a single frame of a stone version of Bill Cipher, the show’s villain, flashed in after the credits had finished.

Alex Hirsch and his team actually created a real-life statue of their villain for their viewers to find and on July 20th, 2016, the Cipher Hunt began.

By following clues, the Hunters found themselves all over the world; Russia, Japan and then travelling throughout the United States for the final 12 clues. When the hunt took them to Los Angeles, actor, Jason Ritter (voice of Dipper Pines, also a massive fan of the series) and Alex Hirsch’s twin sister, Ariel Hirsch (the inspiration for Mabel) joined in the fun helping the search.

Finally, the hunt ended on August 2nd when someone tweeted out an image of the found statue in Oregon, the same state in which the fictional town of Gravity Falls exists. The Cipher Hunt had ended but finding the statue wasn’t Alex’s goal for the scavenger hunt, it was about the journey and bringing together the viewers, more than having them actually find the statue.

Creating its own hoax, an international scavenger hunt and quite a bit of nightmare fuel, Gravity Falls was a show truly unlike any other.

The 2010s saw some of the strongest cartoons ever made, Adventure Time, Gravity Falls and Steven Universe acting as the leaders for multiple different changes in the medium; storytelling, worldbuilding, interaction with viewers, utilizing social media, representation and further pushing music into the cartoon world. From what was created this past decade and what has already been released in 2020, I’m so excited to see what comes next.

I have another one of these which is on Steven Universe’s representation and music if you would like to see that too!! 

[minor-solemnity]

What's your favorite character from the golden trio era?

Oooh idk possibly this is an unpopular opinion - at least it was when I was like, properly in the fandom rather than where I am now which is firmly on the sidelines with my hands over my ears and ignoring everything that I don't like - but Cho Chang. This is probably in part because she got so much undeserved hatred (thank u fandom and author racism) and I am predisposed to like characters that people don't like.

I find her character so heartbreakingly real in a way that I think is entirely accidental on JKR's part. I don't think JK can write women. (Plz don't hate me for that, but like, it's true.) Everything interesting about the characters we are meant to like gets sanded down and ignored in the later books - Hermione's whole thing is like, book smart but not emotionally intelligent, she wants to be right and have people know she's right more than she cares about their feelings. She thinks rules are important until they apply to her. She is ruthless and vindictive and petty. These are interesting character traits that just get completely dropped in the later books. By the time book 6 ends and book 7 starts Hermione is 'wife' and 'mother' and it's kinda sad.

I digress.

Cho's boyfriend is murdered. Cho is understandably upset and heartbroken and sad af. She tries to find comfort in Harry because Harry was there, Harry must understand. Harry can help her process. Their ways of dealing with trauma are completely opposite to each other. Cho seeks emotional vulnerability and closeness from the boy who, of all people, will understand. Harry's way of processing trauma is to ignore it. It happened, it sucks, I will never speak of it again (until all my unprocessed emotions come spilling out and I end up lashing out and getting angry). Those two ways of dealing with trauma are not going to work well together. Harry is honestly a dick towards her - she's his fantasy. She's not a real person to him. When that fantasy comes crashing down he behaves pretty awfully towards her. And if you're reading critically, you come away thinking yeah, Cho's a whiny crybaby who doesn't get Harry at all. What a bitch. When in reality, it's more like - Cho is seriously fucked up and is trying to come to terms with her grief and seek comfort in someone who she thought would get it.

Imagine being like, 16 and being isolated and sad and so fundamentally misunderstood. Imagine being 18 and your friends are dead and the boy you liked is still dead and the other boy you thought you might like is a hero and the only thing you're really known for is the mess that is your grief. Imagine that the popular consensus is that your grief is something to be ridiculed.

I tend to pick and chose which parts of the extended canon I believe in, but I believe in Cho moving to America and getting hitched to an American muggle dude. (Moving to America is probably my own headcanon actually). What would motivate her to move across the world? Grief? Wonderlust? Anger? I imagine it's all three. Idk if this is a relatable feeling to a lot of people, but I get it. I have a constant itch under my skin that tells me to move on whenever a place starts to feel too much like home. To leave. To escape. Nowhere feels like home because home is a collection of broken things. It's a hall of funhouse mirrors - the wires in your brain get mixed up. Comfort and safety become synonymous with 'i will fuck this up' and 'i don't deserve this' and 'everyone will leave'.

I want so many things for Cho. I want her name to make sense. I want her to be seen as something other than 'pretty' and 'sad'. I want her in Boston slamming Sam Adams by Sam Adams grave because she finds it funny. I want her in Boston, learning to drive a car (stick-shift because the driving instructor had made a comment about how automatics are easier to learn and she is tired of people seeing her as something weak and unable). I want her road-raging and I want her to drive across the country because why the fuck not. I want her in New York and the city is so frantic and no one looks at her and she feels so small and the lights are so bright and she thinks maybe she could disappear here and no one would ever know. I want her to find a group of women rollerskating and maybe they invite her to their roller derby group. It isn't flying, but it's fast and aggressive and she's never allowed herself to be aggressive like this before. She's not allowed herself to be angry like this before. No one else has allowed her to be angry like this before.

I want her to go to California and to go to Angel Island and I want her to understand that there have been people like her before. That she is not alone in this feeling. I want her to meet a dude who's studying for an MBA - he doesn't know who she is. Doesn't know what she is. She's just this cute girl who drinks Sam Adams even tho that's a Boston thing and they're in San Diego. He's probably a frat boy. I want him to be a frat boy who takes his degree too seriously and wakes up at like 5 because he's also a gym rat. He takes her to his boxing class. She probably cries during and hey that's okay - she has a lot of shit to work through, he can tell. He doesn't ask about it. Just says her accent is cute. Maybe she starts taking night classes, maybe she doesn't. She's weirdly technologically illiterate - she sends him postcards even though they live in the same city. She says its because her school didn't let them have phones. She's never seen a Tarintino film and that's just like... not cool. They watch True Romance on his shitty box TV in his room in his frat house and she laughs (she laughs like the violence is cathartic) when Alabama completely destroys Virgil. He looks at her and she shrugs and says 'I get it.'

She says that's she's leaving soon - doesn't know where. Probably isn't coming back and again that's... not cool. She's weird about some stuff. Won't talk about home - won't say where she's from. He should be fine with it because like, it's not as if this is anything serious and his life is pretty clearly planned out. Get an MBA, work in some start-up tech company - the internet is a thing now and god, there's money to be made. He thinks maybe that she should like, stay but she also seems like the kind of person who doesn't know how to stop running. And look, he's doing an MBA. He rushed his frat. He goes to boxing every morning without fail. He's determined. He's not good at letting the things he wants go. But he lets her go because she doesn't want to stay. One night afterwards, his frat bro says, philosophical because they're crossfaded, that maybe she can't stay. Maybe she won't let herself stay. And that... That sounds about right.

So he waits. He waits and he gets postcards with no return address - in Seattle, she tries ice hockey. In Miami, she tries surfing. He almost gets on a plane to Cincinnati because she got into a fight with some dude who made his girlfriend cry in public. Apparently, she knocked him out with a punch just the way he showed her to. It feels weirdly romantic.

I want her to write a postcard to him when she's sitting in a bar in Las Vegas and I want her to include a return address. I want him on the first flight out, because fuck his classes? She included a return address. He asks her if she's ever going to go home and she looks at him and says, 'What? To San Diego?'