#i honestly just think people need to know that it's okay to be a little chubby
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📝 skz reaction - you fall asleep on their laps
pairing. ot8!skz x gn!reader (individually)
type. fluff fluff fluffff
warnings. gender neutral reader, curse words (thats how i show my enthusiasm okay)
a/n. as someone who falls asleep anywhere and loves to sleep with people around me, i need to have a nap on each of them thank you.
a/n 2. yes the members order is reversed… thats just how inspiration struck and i couldn’t be bothered to change it SUE ME🫥
(pictures are not mine. credit to the owner!)
(divider credit!)
jeongin ⊹ ࣪ ˖ he would maybe be a lil annoyed at first thinking you're not moving because you want to annoy him. until he realizes that no no you're just extenuated and literally fell asleep on him which would suprise him sooo much. poor baby wouldn't know what to do with himself. he probably woudn't dare to move and would be tensed as all hell. although, slowly, he'd relax and grow into it. once he gets over his fear of waking you up he'd be so so smitten with you, cooing at how adorable you are, to the point where that actually woke you up
seungmin ⊹ ࣪ ˖ he would def be annoyed, going as far as trying to make you move away or scold you to go to bed. it's not that he doesn't like it, but he's uncomfortable and can’t understand why you’d want to cuddle him. once he asked why you didn't sleep somewhere else and you explained there was something about him that made you feel safe and at peace, that annoyance and awkwardness *poof* disappeared. he would let you sleep with your head comfortably laying on his lap while he practices a few songs and hums you to sleep aka best thing EVER. once you're fast asleep he would ask for someone to bring you a blanket and proceed to give a death stare to anyone who might make too much noise (euhm euhm binnie).
felix ⊹ ࣪ ˖ when you pouted and asked him to sleep on his lap he didn't even think before answering yes. being very comfortable with physical touch, our lil aussie boy would not mind at all. except he would not be prepared for how ADORABLE you look when you sleep. he would definitely take a thousand pictures of you (which he keeps in a special album in his phone). he would love to play in your hair or lightly massage your shoulders. and after that first time, whenever he sees you yawn a little too much he'd motion for you to lay on his lap. he is not ashamed to say one of his favorite thing to do is gaming while you're dozing off on his lap.
han ⊹ ࣪ ˖ first time it happened he was soooo scared to wake you up and wouldn't move at all. but that stopped very quick lmao, he would love when you fall asleep on him, even though he's not the best for it because he keeps moving and wiggling around. loves loves loves skinship, so he would constantly play with your hair, your clothes or poke your cheeks while you're trying to fall asleep. the only way to make this really work for both of you would be for him to watch his favorites animes while you're sleeping with your head on his shoulder.
hyunjin ⊹ ࣪ ˖ he says he's not a fan of physical touch, but that does not apply to the ppl he's close with. including you. when you fall alseep on his lap he's an absolute cuddle master. he would put his sweater on you when you shiver and coo whenever you make a little grumbling noise. he'd love to draw little sketches of you while you're asleep or take pictures, which most likely wake you up and make you move away and makes him whine like a baby. he's honestly kind of annoying to fall asleep on, but whenever you'd move away he would for sure bring you back on his lap with a promise to stop bothering you this time.
changbin ⊹ ࣪ ˖ despite the fact that he has the attention span of a squirrel and that he's one loud motherfucker, whenever you fall alseep on his lap he turns into a statue. this man will not move or say a thing. he'd love how innocent and relaxed you look when you're sleeping and would be ready to annihilate anyone who may interupt that. the boys would definitely try to taunt him with food to get him to move but he'd categorically refuse to bother your peaceful naps. when they inevitably bring that fact to your attention he'd become all shy and he mumble about how it's not his fault you look so precious when you sleep.
minho ⊹ ࣪ ˖ mister minho would act annoyed for half a second before he pulls you closer and play mindlessly with strands of your hair. there is legit no space between the two of you and that's how he likes it okay >:( he would give dirty looks to the boys whenever they tried taunting him about how soft he is with you. most of the time he falls alseep too, his hands resting on your hips while the boys take pictures of the pair of you. when they show them to you guys afterwards he says nothing but has a small shy smile and you can bet your ass he will have one of those pictures as his background.
bangchan ⊹ ࣪ ˖ he would fucking love when you fall asleep on his lap. it's no secret channie is one caring little fucker and he loves to care for/protect the people he loves. the first time you would settle your head on his lap to relax he'd try to play it cool as if it was no big deal, but when he'd realize you actually fell asleep his heart would be seconds away from fricking exploding. you'd look so cute and cozy and keep wiggling to be closer to him. it would definitly make his lil soft heart flutter and he would make funny faces, incapable of containing the effect you have on him (which the boys love to make fun of him for). after the first time, he'd declare himself your official nap spot and it would not be negotiable or else he’d pout and whine until you finally come to him.
#ilya writes#stray kids fanfic#stray kids x reader#stray kids#stray kids fluff#bang chan#lee know#changbin#hyunjin#han skz#felix skz#seungmin#i.n skz
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Hi,I wanted to request a fluff lando norris x sainz reader.you can make it however you would like.if you can make it amazing and if not, that's ok, also I love your writing <3
lando norris x sainz!reader
A/n: short little blurb
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"Are you sure it's okay if I stay here?" You asked your brother as he carried your suitcases into his Monaco apartment.
"Of course," he said, scoffing. "It's insulting that you even ask that; you're my sister."
"I know...but I don't want to impose," you said. Carlos set your bag down and brought his hands down to your shoulders.
"You can stay here as long as you want; I'm gone a lot of the time anyways," he said, reassuring you.
Moving in with your brother had not been in the cards for this year, but after you were laid off last month, you couldn't afford to renew your lease for your London apartment, so here you were. There were some good leads for jobs in Monaco, so moving in with Carlos temporarily seemed like a good move. Plus, the country was beautiful.
A few weeks in, you settled into a good routine. You went on a run every morning, followed by yoga, and then you applied for jobs or went in for interviews. You were in the final rounds at several places and felt optimistic. On nights Carlos was there, you hung out with him, but you tried to carve out a new life for yourself in Monaco. You joined a book club at your new favorite bookstore, hung out at the beach, and went to bars alone in hopes of meeting new people.
Carlos was out of town this weekend on a quick trip to see Rebecca, so you had the place to yourself. Declaring it a "self-care" night, you cooked your favorite pasta dish, poured a big glass of wine, and set yourself up to watch your favorite kind of thing on Netflix: a crime documentary.
Not even two minutes in, someone was knocking at the door. Annoyed, you paused the show and tossed the blanket off of you, heading to the door. Swinging it open, you were surprised to see Lando Norris standing there, giving you an equally confused look.
"Is Carlos here?" He asked once he collected himself.
"No, he's in Spain with Rebecca," you told him. "Do you need something?"
"Not really," he said, shrugging. "I just wanted to see if he wanted to grab dinner or something."
You nodded and started to close the door, but Lando stuck his foot out, stopping it.
"Is that pasta?" He said, a hopeful look in his eyes as he looked past your shoulder to the leftovers you hadn't put away yet.
You gently rested your head against the door, closing your eyes before you sighed and fully pulled it open, allowing him to step in.
"I don't even know you," you grumbled as he started towards the kitchen.
"We've met plenty of times y/n," he chirped as he made himself a plate. "What are you watching?"
"A crime documentary," you replied. "Don't you have better things to do on a Friday night? Going to the club? Getting on the sim? Streaming?"
“Not really,” he said with a grin. “Watching a crime documentary sounds good. Can I have a glass of wine?”
“Help yourself,” you muttered, moving back to the couch. He downed the pasta and brought a glass with him to the couch, sitting down to join you. Silently you started the documentary and the two of you spent the next hour and a half completely hooked.
“So do you think he did it?” Lando asked as the credits rolled.
“I honestly have no idea, “ you replied thoughtfully.
“I think he did,” Lando said confidently and you laughed at the triumphant look on his face. The two of you had shifted closer to each other during the show, now only a short distance apart. “Every excuse he has is just ‘too perfect.’”
You started to reply but were interrupted by your phone ringing on the coffee table. You threw Lando an apologetic look before answering.
“Hello?”
“Hola y/n, just calling to check in on you,” you heard your brother say over the line.
“Hi Carlos, everything is great. I had to take over your babysitting duties for tonight,” you joked and Lando pouted at you.
“Lando is there?” Carlos asked and you snorted while Lando groaned.
“Yeah, I’ve fed him and entertained him for the night,” you said and Carlos laughed.
“No funny business okay?” Carlos asked and your face flamed red. You mumbled a goodbye to him, ignoring the look of glee on Lando’s face.
“No funny business huh,” Lando said and you flipped him off.
“Are you leaving now? It’s late,” you said and he shook his head.
“Let’s watch another one,” he said and you sighed, but agreed. Handing him the remote, you got up to get a blanket, bringing it back and throwing it over you and Lando. He picked another documentary from the options and you two settled in. You could feel yourself growing sleepier as the show went on and you constantly squirmed, trying to get comfortable.
“Lean on me,” Lando whispered, not taking off his eyes off the screen.
“What?” You whisper yelled back at him. He held his arm up and beckoned you closer . “No funny business Norris.”
“No funny business Sainz,” he said back with an amused grin. Sighing, you moved into him and it was annoying how comfy he was. Snuggling into his chest you tried to stay awake but ended up drifting off. Lando looked down at you with a small smile on his face; little did you know that he already knew Carlos was out of town, he just wanted an excuse to see you.
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Dancing With The Devil I
Pairing: Alternative!Bucky Barnes x Cheerleader!F!Reader
Word count: 5.2k
Summary: You were always a sensible girl — an angel some would say. But how quickly are you willing to shred your wings when the devil himself is so damn tempting?
Or, Bucky Barnes, college’s resident bad boy, upturns your ethics, your morals, your life when you invite him to support the cheer teams’ fundraising kissing booth.
Warnings: College AU, bad boy v. good girl trope, inexperienced!reader, Bucky has tattoos and piercings, pet names, unwanted groping (not from Bucky!!), violence, mention of blood, sexual tension, almost kisses.
Author’s Note: Unbeta’d. Divider by @saradika-graphics. Part 1 of 2 — this is a build up to the smut. Hope you enjoy!
The fundraiser season was upon you — an event your college went a little crazy for every year and as a new member of the cheer squad, it was a main part of your duty to join in with the festivities.
A proposition of a kissing booth, shyly put forward by yourself had become a hit amongst the rest of the cheerleaders that they instantly approved of — most of them, at least. It was all in good spirit to raise money for charity.
And so wanting to gather hype around the event — one you had tirelessly worked day and night to put together — you and your best friend, Sharon, volunteered to hand out fliers together. The two of you wandered aimlessly around the courtyard in your team uniform to spread the word.
“I think this is going to be really good, sweet,” Sharon excitedly spoke over her shoulder as she stapled a flier onto the notice board. “I checked our hashtag on the school's twitter page this morning and we’re already trending.”
Your eyes widened and you spun your head towards her in shock. “Really?” Whipping out your phone from your skirt pocket, you quickly brought up the app and checked the post — already the most anticipated fundraiser of the night. “That was fast!”
“Mhm,” she mumbled, nodding her head. Slyly, she looked over at you from the corner of her eye. “I bet you’re excited about all those hot and sweaty football players who are gonna be lining up for a kiss.”
Your head snapped up from your phone with your mouth parted, struggling to scold her. “Sharon!” you squealed.
“What?” The smirk on her face was all too teasing for your liking. “You know most of them are gonna be desperate for a small piece of you, sweets.”
Your cheeks grew warm, an embarrassed heat growing up your neck as you stumbled over your words. “N-No I don’t think so—“
“C’mon babe.” Sharon stopped what she was doing and cocked her hip towards you with a raised eyebrow. “You really don’t see the boys practically drooling over you?”
Honestly, you didn’t see it. Spending most of your time practicing your routines or studying in the library, there was no time to worry about boys and you didn’t have much experience within the relationship department anyway, which made you blind to any advances.
“Even if they did, they’re not my type.” You shrugged, not giving in to the disbelieving expression on Sharon’s face. “I’m serious! I’m just not into that.”
“Okay, sure—whatever you say.” Your friend playfully taunted you with a smile until her gaze locked onto something behind you. A small frown appeared on her lips and a not-so-subtle sneer lined her cheeks. “Just so long as it isn’t them, for fucks sake—the last thing you need is an asshole like that.”
Spinning around, you squinted your eyes, looking for whoever Sharon was talking about. A group of students, dressed collectively in hoodies, leather jackets and combat boots were gathered around the bike sheds with a cloud of smoke billowing over their heads.
“What’s wrong with them?” you asked inquisitively, genuinely stumped for her dismay.
“Trust me, sweets. You don’t want to get wrapped up with those people. They’ll fucking eat you up and spit you back out,” Sharon replied.
Leaning on your tiptoes, you spotted a familiar face in the crowd. “Well, what about Wanda? She’s with them and she’s not an asshole.”
Your friend seemed to struggle to come up with an answer to your question. “That’s different. She’s part of our squad and she’s actually nice.”
That didn’t appease you, though. “Couldn’t that mean the others are nice, too?”
Sharon was protective, fierce to those she loved and held dear. She had befriended you the day you bumped into each other on the field for practice; when your eyes were holding back tears after Daisy, the second in command cheerleader, made a remark with her friends about how on earth you had managed to be accepted onto the team.
Since then, the two of you have been glued at the hip — like sisters you dared to think. Her advice was gospel to you and so you took her word seriously. “Sweetie, they’re no good. Just trust me.”
“Okay,” you sighed as you turned back around. A solemness took over as you remembered that you had been benched to the sidelines for your very own event. “I don’t actually think I’ll be working the booth anyway. Daisy said she only needs me on clean up duty.”
Sharon’s body suddenly tensed with aggravation.
“Excuse me?” Her eyes were burning with fury as she turned to look at you. “Daisy said what now?”
“T-That I have to clean up?” you offered once again unsure.
Your friend scoffed. “She can’t do that—she has no fucking right to do that. You came up with the idea!”
The intensity of her anger, even when not directed at you, was overwhelming and your eyes darted down while you mumbled disheartenedly, “I know but what can I do? What she says goes.”
The fire in Sharon’s eyes was unlike anything else as she went on a tirade of rage — her own dislike for Daisy getting the better of her.
You zoned out of the conversation, not wanting to dwell on the upset Daisy’s disapproval of you caused. Instead, you counted the rest of your fliers, satisfied to at least have made progress for the day.
Just as you were about to jump back into the heated conversation, laughter behind you caught your attention. While Sharon was busy brewing in her hatred, you glanced over your shoulder to once again look at the group you had become so intrigued by.
The colourful paper in your hand, rustling together with the slight breeze drew you to look at them. You only had a few fliers left and you knew Daisy would have something to say if you came back with them.
A lightbulb dinged in your mind. Your head snapped up; your whole face lit up with the prospect to gain a wider audience for your event.
Sharon’s voice became clear then. “I can’t believe she even has the audacity when she’s not even the head cheerleader. Such a stuck up bi—“
“We still have fliers left!” you interrupted your friend mid sentence, feigning shock as though you had only just noticed. She stopped talking and frowned while you began to walk backwards. “M-Maybe I should just head over there to hand them out. We do need all the people we can get after all.”
Looking behind you, the direction of your steps, her eyes widened once she saw where you were going. “Sweets—,” she warned, as though she was talking to an animal ready to run. “Come back here, please.”
But there was no use; you had already spun around and started skipping on over. “Hey—Wait! Get back here you little shit!”
The pleats of your skirt bounced along with you while you giggled, your shoes scuffing along the pavement until you stopped in front of the large group. With the little confidence you had, you cleared your throat before squeaking your greeting over the loudness. “Hi!”
Instantly, conversation amongst everyone died down, every single person turning their head to you. A pin drop could be heard over the busy courtyard.
The amount of beady eyes, all wondering who had interrupted them, caused an overwhelming anxiety to fester in your stomach. Regret soon sank in as what small bout of bravery you once had soon whittled away once you gained their attention.
Swallowing the lump in your throat, you were sure everyone heard your gulp before you forced yourself to speak. “I—I um, just wanted to—to hand these out.” Your hands shook as you held the vibrant fliers up — the red and pinks contrasting to the sea of black and greys staring you down like prey. “For our fundraiser cel-celebration.”
The awkwardness dragged on in the silence and your skin crawled with nerves. This was a terrible idea. Sharon was right, you should have never come over and instead listened to her. But you were soon pulled from your inner turmoil.
A brooklyn drawl, raspy yet smooth cut through the deafening stillness at the same time a tall figure stood up in the crowd, whistling low as he feasted on you. “Well ain’t you the prettiest lil’ thing, hoppin’ on over in your short skirt.”
It was difficult, even in the daylight, to make out the face of this stranger; long shaggy brown hair, hidden behind a hood. Even partly elusive, you had never seen anyone like him before, but you couldn’t deny the tingles that shot up your arms and made the fine hairs stand on edge.
His thick-soled boots, covered in buckles that jingled with each step, thudded menacingly along the concrete while he made his way over to you. And as the sun hit his face just right, that’s when you saw his eyes, bright blue and sparkling; giving attention to his silver nose ring.
You were held to your spot, breathless and squirming. Though you tampered yourself as he drew closer and finally came before you, one step away from touching your toes. “So, what’s this you got planned, sweet thing?”
A gruff blonde with cropped hair and a sleeveless denim jacket snorted behind him, a thick scruffy beard decorating his face. “Go easy on her, punk.”
The stranger that had you a little starstruck brought himself even closer — within an inch of you — crossing his arms behind his back and squinting curiously to look directly into your eyes, a gleam in his own.
You were intoxicated by the smell of leather and smoke, a combination that should have made you feel sick and yet rendered you dizzy with heat. The spell he bound you with held you in a deep trance. “A kissing booth,” you whispered timidly.
“Oh?” He grinned wide, a huff of fresh mint from the gum he was chewing combined with his aroma. “A kissing booth, you say?”
“It’s for charity.” You licked your lips with hesitation. “You—um—you pay for a ticket and in return a girl of your choosing from the team can k-kiss you—“ A sudden thought that you had no idea who you were talking to stopped you from continuing and you shook your head apologetically. “I’m sorry I didn’t catch your name.”
The man in front of you smirked, sinister and perverse. His eyes darted between your own while you trembled, close to breaking a sweat. “You can call me Bucky, sweetheart,” he replied, smoothly.
Murmurs and quiet chatter from the rest of Bucky’s friends picked up while he took you in, his eyes clinging to the bare skin of your thighs, barely covered by your cheer skirt.
You began to introduce yourself, too. “My name is—“
“Oh, I know who you are.” The corner of his lips curled up while he dragged his eyes lazily up your body. “I’ve seen how you move. The twirls and spins and shit, lookin’ all cute.”
“Y-You have?” you asked in shock, surprised to find he was already familiar with you.
“Mm, I’ve heard all about you.” He nodded, before cocking his head behind him. To your surprise, you looked and found your squad mate, Wanda, who threw you a sly wink. Your attention was brought back to Bucky, gliding his pierced tongue across his pearly white teeth. “A cute bunny showing off her tricks is kinda hard to miss.”
His presence was all too intimidating, but one of the sweetest addictions you knew would give you an all time high. You couldn’t keep still, switching your weight between you feet as subtly as you could possibly manage. Opening your mouth, you readied yourself to respond until Bucky’s eyes flicked to your side.
An all too out of breath Sharon, weary eyed and scary looking stormed towards you. Uncaring for your new friend, she stood in front of him, blocking his view while her hands grasped your upper arms to check you over. “Sweetie! Are you okay?”
The strenuous effort to tear your eyes away from Bucky was almost impossible. “Mhm,” you mumbled noncommittally, finally able to bring your gaze to Sharon. “I’m okay.”
Leaning to the side, Bucky caught your eyes once again as he asked. “Will you be workin’, sweetheart?”
Confusion fogged up your mind, disorientated as your eyes played tennis between him and your best friend. “I’m sorry?”
“The kissing booth.” He reiterated, standing straight to pluck the cigarette tucked behind his ear. Those damned eyes never left you while he placed it between his lips and grabbed a light from his back jean pocket. “Will you be workin’ it?”
“Oh!” You shook your head, trying to get out of your daze as he lit his cigarette. “I—um—I don’t know. I don’t think so. Technically?” Nerves made you ramble on. “I’m sort of working—but I won’t be near the booth and—”
Stepping forward, Bucky gently pushed Sharon out the way. “Hey!” she huffed, glaring at him. But he ignored her in favour of closing the distance between the two of you.
He placed his thumb over your lips, effectively silencing you as he took a drag of his smoke and blew it out to the side of you with a smirk. “You’ll be there, Bunny.” Your eyes fluttered when he chucked your chin and winked. “Make sure of it and you won’t regret it.”
Struggling to come down from floating in the clouds, you almost whined as he teased his finger along your neck when he stepped back — his chilled rings lit your nerves on fire. You stared hopelessly after him as he started to walk backwards away from you to his friends.
“I’ll bring some of these fuckers too!” he shouted over the growing distance between you, gracing you with one last grin. “Good for business and all.”
You sighed, a love-sickening one that caused your friend to roll her eyes. Sharon clicked her fingers in your face, snapping you out of your haze. “Sweets!”
You shook your head and your hooded eyes darted over to her. “Huh?”
Sharon grabbed your shoulders, a firm scolding ready on her lips. “Listen to me,” she implored. “You need to stay away from him. He’s bad news.”
You swallowed, unable to help the flicker of your eyes back to Bucky, watching as he threw his head back while he laughed, his full head of long hair framing his face beautifully.
Sharonl cleared her throat pointedly and you snapped back to her, a guilty expression to your features. “Okay?” she reiterated.
You begrudgingly nodded, and she sighed, seemingly appeased for now. Looping her arms through yours, she pulled you away and began to speak about your fundraiser once more.
When once, incessant talk and arrangement of the kissing booth would have spilled from your lips, you held quiet; basking in whatever the hell had just happened.
It was impossible to stop yourself from looking over your shoulder once more. To catch a final peek of Bucky, and your heart jumped as you caught his steel eyes already focused on you. Glancing back to Sharon, she was in her own world, already deep into discussion about decorations.
Discreetly, you turned around, happy to find Bucky’s gaze still reciprocated and so you waved, small enough to not catch your friend’s attention. You held back a squeal, fighting to stave off the bubble in your throat that was desperate to escape when he brought his inked hand up to his mouth and blew you a kiss.
It was a couple of days later while you were grabbing your books for your next class when you next saw Bucky. Earlier than expected but not at all in the way you imagined.
You were at your locker, reaching to the back for that one annoying book that always seemed to hide from you. Your back was turned to the busy corridors, other students passing by as your fingertips ghosted along the textbook you needed when the feel of someone’s hand groping your ass caused you to jump in fright.
Spinning around in shock, you came face to face with an all too pleased Tony Stark — the school’s rich playboy. “Hey, sweet cheeks.”
The sleazy grin he donned made you feel queasy, but to avoid confrontation, you instead laughed nervously, hiding your discomfort. “Um, h-hi, Tony.”
He leaned his arm over your head against the lockers, trapping you in with no way to escape. “How haven’t I noticed you before, hm? Nothing better than some fresh meat on the cheerleading team.”
Beginning to squirm, you shifted away as best as you could with hardly any distance between you — the unease you felt clear from your expression. “Excuse me—I’m sorry—you’re just—a little too close—“
“Let me take you out tonight,” he interrupted, careless to your lack of comfortability. “I’ll show you a real good time.”
Alarm bells started to ring in your head. The fact that he had touched you without permission in such a crowded place and continued to ignore your requests unsettled you deeply.
You looked around frantically, trying to silently scream for help. But no one batted an eyelid to your situation.
“Tony,” you quietly said, not wanting to cause a scene. “I’m not interested and I’ve really got to go—“
“Don’t be a prude, babe.” A lump tightened in your throat as Tony pawed at your waist, his clammy fingers digging into you harshly. “It’s not a good look on you.”
Fear clouded your ability to shout out. Sharon wasn’t there to be your knight in shining armor like usual and you clawed down your cries as best as you could. To your dismay, tears began to gather over your waterline. “Please. Just—just move back and we can talk—“
“It’s okay,” he whispered against your neck. “Just say yes and I’ll take care of you.”
Closing your eyes tight, you willed for him to leave you alone, your fingernails digging into your palms so hard they created indents into your skin. His breath against your neck made you desperately want to crawl out of your skin, his unwanted touch and proximity more of a burden than a compliment.
You were rendered useless, weak. His heavy weight pinned you down to the lockers and left you unmoving. Overwhelmed, your breathing started to become erratic, panicked and just as you thought you couldn’t take it any longer, Tony’s presence disappeared and the air rushed back to your lungs.
A loud commotion sounded on the other side of the hallway, but the blur of it all was disabling. It took you a while to gather the courage to squint your eyes open and once your vision became clear, you gasped at the sight of Bucky slamming Tony against the other side of the lockers, holding him up by his shirt with an unparalleled fury in his darkened eyes.
“B-Barnes!” Tony squeaked in shock. “Heyy there, take it easy big guy—“
Bucky jolted him brutally another time. “What the fuck do you think you’re doin’ to her?” he growled, venom in his voice and a tone that held no room for humour.
Tony laughed, apprehensively. “C’mon man, we were just having some fun.”
Disgust was clearly visible on Bucky’s face as he reeled back, only serving to make him angrier. “Fun?” he scoffed. “You think it’s fun bein’ a fuckin’ creep? She told you no.”
Soon enough, a mob of students had gathered around the commotion, filming with their phones and whispering amongst themselves in anticipation for a fight.
You watched as Tony’s cheeks flared red, the embarrassment of being so easily overpowered by Bucky in front of the whole school paralysing him when his eyes suddenly shot to you, a vein bulging from his forehead.
You cowered back as much as possible, covering your body with your arms while he spat, “Are you fucking kidding me? She—she wants it! Look at her! The bitch is practically begging for it in that skirt.”
There was a stilted pause, a deathly quiet over the hallway before a chilling laugh echoed from Bucky. “You’re gonna fuckin’ regret that.”
A flock of shouts and cheers bounced off the lockers as Bucky threw Tony to the ground. Without remorse, he grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt before he tried to desperately crawl away and pummeled him to the floor with a single punch, the silver rings on his fingers cutting the skin of Tony’s cheek and smothering blood over his face.
You winced as you heard Tony’s pleas for mercy as Bucky continued to lay into him. The sight should have worried you — Sharon’s previous warnings clear as day in your head — but your thighs rubbed together instead, an ache between them leaving you equal parts aroused and concerned.
The one sided fight seemed to be over within seconds. Bucky stopped, letting Tony flop to the floor, gifted with an instantaneous black eye and most likely broken nose.
Stepping over his body, Bucky squatted down, a grave warning grunted as his chest rose and fell with adrenaline. “If you ever talk about Bunny like that again, or even look at her.” He paused, laughing sadistically. “Who am I fuckin’ kiddin’? If you dare breathe the same air as her again, I won’t be so fuckin’ kind next time.” The humour died from his tone within seconds. “Are we clear?”
When he didn’t hear a response from Tony, he forcefully kicked his boot into the side of his ribs. “I said, are we clear?”
“Y-Yes! Yes—please—we’re clear!” Tony coughed out a quick reply, the pain in his voice evident.
Satisfied, Bucky swept his long hair back from his face and stood up. He caught his breath for a moment, hands on his hips as the students watched on, just as mesmerised as you.
But he paid them no attention as he suddenly brought his gaze over to your direction. He had no trouble finding you as he towered over the crowd and they immediately parted the way for him while he strode towards you.
You held your breath when he reached you and immediately cradled your face with his hands — his delicacy while he handled you compared to Tony stunned you. He wiped the remaining tears away with his thumbs as he looked at you with concern. “Angel, are you okay?”
It took you a while to respond, still reeling from the previous events. “I—I think so,” you stuttered, though not from fear of Tony anymore.
Bucky’s hands gently fell down to your waist, the cutout of your uniform allowing him to touch your bare skin. “Don’t worry, baby. I’ll make sure he—“
As he lightly squeezed your hips, you inhaled sharply, a shoot of pain radiating through your body.
Bucky instantly stopped in his tracks and quickly lifted his hands, only to find bruises in the shape of fingertips staining your skin. A dark cloud fell over his cerulean eyes. “That fucker,” he growled, turning to shoot daggers at Tony’s form still crouched on the floor. “I’m gonna kill him.”
Before Bucky could lunge back at him, you grabbed at his arms, a desperate need to keep him close. “No!” you cried, waiting until he whipped his head back round to you as you pleaded, “Please stay with me.”
His gaze flicked back to your bruise, confliction locking up his muscles. “Bunny, he fuckin’ marked you. No way am I lettin’ him get away with that shit—“
You grabbed his hand and began dragging him along, away from everyone still lingering and staring at the two of you. “Please, Bucky?”
The fury dissolved from his features, your sweet request too difficult to ignore. “Okay,” he sighed, following you blindly as you led him into an empty storage closet.
Locking the door behind you, you turned the light switch on. There was limited proximity between you in the tight space, but Bucky seemed to have no qualms being so close to you.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered, diverting your eyes away from him and fidgeting with the hem of your skirt.
You didn’t see the confusion on Bucky’s face, how perplexed he was for your apology. “Bunny,” he called for you, waiting until you looked at him. “What in the fuck have you got to be sorry for?”
Your breaths started to come in heavy, lips trembling as you tried to hold your tears back. “I didn’t—I didn’t mean to—to cause a fight,” you sniffled. “I shouldn’t have been wearing my uniform and—“
“Hey,” Bucky cut you off, stern and resolute. His fingers sweeped your hair out of your face gently. “You did absolutely nothin’ wrong, you hear me?”
Your eyes darted down, however he was quick to catch your chin with his forefinger and thumb. “Look at me.”
With glassy eyes, you did just that, reluctant but submissive to his order.
Bucky wrapped his hand around the back of your neck, his thumb running back and forth soothingly, “Don’t you ever apologise for that shit.” His blue eyes bore into your soul. “I beat the shit out of that fucker because he deserved it. No one talks to you like that and gets away with it. You understand, baby?”
Timidly, you nodded your head. “Mhm.”
“I mean it.” He reiterated, determined to make you see sense.
You weren’t convinced, Bucky could tell. Delicately, he smoothed his free hand over your waist. “Besides,” he shrugged his shoulders, a teasing smile crawling onto his face. “My Bunny looks fuckin’ hot in her uniform.”
Heat began to creep up your neck and a nervous giggle escaped from your lips. The anxious knot that had built in your stomach slowly began to unravel in Bucky’s presence.
“There she is.” He stroked your bottom lip with his thumb. “C’mon, sweetheart you’ve gotta know how fuckin’ good you look in that outfit, waving your pom poms and puttin’ on a show.”
“You’ve watched me?” Your breathing picked up.
“Course I fuckin’ have. Knew you were somethin’ special when Wanda mentioned you.”
You relaxed into his hold, melting from his touch. However, from the corner of your eye, a flicker of dark red running down from his hand down to his wrist caught your attention.
You gasped, grabbing his hand and turning it to get a better look at the damage to his knuckles. “Bucky! You’re bleeding!”
He raised his eyebrows, a little surprised to see he was in fact bleeding. Laughing it off, he tried to ease your worries. “Ah sweetheart—it’s nothin’. Don’t even worry about it—“
“Like hell I won’t!” The unexpected fire in your voice stunned Bucky as his eyebrows rose in shock. Thinking on your toes, you spun around towards the shelves. “Let me find something.”
While you were busy rummaging through storage boxes, you missed the heated glint in his eyes and the subtle squeeze of his own dick through his denim pants.
You searched until you found an unopened pack of bandages along with some ointment cream. Softly, you took his hand over to the old sink in the corner and began washing the dried up blood staining his skin.
Bucky watched intently while you gently cleaned him up, your tongue stuck out between your lips as you wrapped the bandage around his knuckles in concentration.
“There. Good as new.” You smiled happily with your work and without thinking, you carefully lifted his damaged hand up to your lips to kiss over the bandage.
The realisation of how bold your action was finally caught up to you. With caution, your eyes flitted up expecting the worst. However, your mouth slightly dropped open as you noticed the wicked glint in his eyes while he stared you down like a wolf. “You’re just precious, ain’t you, angel?”
You didn’t have the chance to respond as Bucky spun you around and cornered you against the wall. You should have felt as vulnerable as you did with Tony, but you only whimpered with curious delight as tingles shot down your spine.
Your noses bumped together when Bucky moved in even closer, lips so close to touching. “This okay, Bunny?”
Fighting off a shudder, you quickly nodded without hesitation. “Yes.”
He chuckled breathily. “I haven’t stopped fuckin’ thinking about you.”
Common sense seemed so far from reality as you closed your eyes and rested your head back against the wall. His scent dizzied you, his whole presence threw you for a loop. How the hell had he gotten into your system in such a short span of time?
“You know I’d kill anyone who tried to touch you like that don’t you, baby?” Your fingers tangled into the lapels of Bucky’s leather jacket while his soft lips teased yours. “No one else can have you. You were mine since I laid eyes on you.”
“Oh—Bucky.” Just as wrecked as you, he began to lean in and you closed your eyes in anticipation for his kiss. All he had to do was push forward, connect the remaining distance and claim you.
But to your luck, the school bell for the beginning of class rang loud through the hallway. Sense came back to you then. Opening your eyes, you quickly untangled yourself out of Bucky’s hold.
You half-expected him to be annoyed, but instead he had the biggest grin on his face, almost predatory.
Skittishly you started to walk backwards towards the exit of the storage closet. “I—um,” you began. “I need to go—go to my class.”
Bucky smirked even wider while he combed his ringed fingers through his messy hair and then slid his hands into his pockets. “Mhm,” he mumbled devilishly.
“I’ll s-see you around?” You offered, lamely while you fumbled with the handle of the door. Your nerves built even higher when he started to stalk towards you and the simple task of opening the door seemed impossible.
“You sure will, Bunny.” Bucky gained closer, a couple of steps away from you when you finally managed to swing the door open with urgency.
Hurriedly, you excited the closet, breathing heavily. But you shrieked as you collided into another person. Turning around to apologise, your words died on your tongue when you found the person you had bumped into was none other than Sharon.
“Sweets?” she asked, instantly concerned at your flustered state. “What’s wrong? Did something happen—“
Then, her eyes glanced behind you, a scowl appearing on her face while a disheveled Bucky exited the same closet you just stumbled out of.
You gulped as her fierce gaze shot to you. “I can explain.”
“We’re having a serious talk.” Once again, Sharon dragged you away from Bucky and you fought to keep up to pace with her.
You felt like a child being pulled away from their favourite toy. Bucky was trouble, that much you knew. But of course, you couldn’t help but look over your shoulder — a common occurrence it seemed — and you also couldn’t help the grin that crept onto your face as you watched him wiggle his fingers at you in goodbye with a wink.
Trouble had never looked better — with horns and a tail that could make heaven’s most loyal angel want to sin.
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x f!reader#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes smut#bucky Barnes fanfic
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i wanted to rant about simon.
what do you think so far like what are your actual headcanons for the canon simon vs this simon from this series?
my feelings about the actual simon is quite vague. i've read far more fanfictions than bothering with the actual material so my picture of his is not really...constant? idk
but with this simon, he scares me. just to think about people that can engage in such romantic and sensual acts with little to no feeling involved.
or the mc's father. her dad makes me feel such an anger and injustice that i don't know how to express it and i know we probably won't get a satisfying update on him.
you don't like your wife fine i could understand the distance between them, but how can somebody forget their child no matter if they share the same blood or not, after all the time he raised her
leaving all that behind just to start a whole new life. how can that not eat somebody alive
OHH this is actually a good question. honestly for me, simon is probably one of the hardest character to write about because he doesn't give away too much. too calm. too know-it-all.
we're just gonna talk about the romance aspects!
but based on my head-canon of the canon simon, he has those younger years where he avoids romance, but not this actively and aggressively. it's more because he has too much on his plate (anger management issues, PTSD, depression) than because he think he's not good enough for some happiness (but he also doesn't expect/hope for it.)
canon younger (probably 6-7 years after he killed Roba) Simon lives his life without the need for things to turn out in certain ways. as he gets older (yes, the 2022/2023 ghost) and better mentally, he's become a little more open to the idea, though.
he's still not actively seeking romance, settling on one-nightstands and things that don't require any strings attached. however, he's not completely closed off to the idea too. if he has someone he likes AND TRUST (this is already a high wall to get over), he might act on it. but again, not really actively pursuing it and knows he doesn't need it.
and this might come as a surprise, but he's actually the biggest flirt out there—well, at least when it's only the two of you. when in front of his taskforce, he goes back to acting like he's the calm, collected, cool, stoic, scary lieutenant that everyone knows. can't have you ruin his reputation, right?
"it's private but not secret," with him. though it's not loud PDA, sometimes he lets his hands linger in places like your waist, your hips, shoulders. his love language is act of service, gift giving, physical touch—he makes sure to always appreciate you with compliments and love affirmations, but he's never really a man who's big on words.
WHILE THIS SIMON, hmmm.. he's a bit more complicated. and a mess. at some point, you can think of him as the younger version of canon simon we just talked about to simplify it, but even that's not really accurate considering the different ways they handle "all that sappy stuff" (as simon would say). this one actively and AGGRESIVELY avoids romance.
and while they both (my ver. of canon simon and this simon) sort to flings and one-nightstands, the canon simon is more careful and actually follows the boundaries he draws himself. while this simon outlines the boundaries, follows his rules until an interesting bird enters his orbit, violates them, and destroys them himself before he goes around saying "you read that wrong, darling."
NOW, ABOUT THE FATHER. . .
RIGHT! in my opinion, it's better for them to get a divorce actually and Dad still plays a role in MC's life rather than just leaving her. like, i know it'll still hurt the MC but, at least she can still have both of her parents even though in different houses! at least she doesn't have to feel neglected in her childhood.
okay, you hate someone you thought you would love forever, but abandoning your child? whose very existence was created because of you? talk about the Dad will come up in the sequel. hell, he'll even make an appearance with his two ballet loving new daughters. imagine how MC will feel.
sadly, this happens a lot in real life. fathers leaving and starting a new life without thinking about his "old" family. how people shame single mothers but never the absent fathers. people shame many women who have "daddy issues" or call them "fatherless" yet never call out men's incapability of being a real, PRESENT father.
#𐙚 — a man's heart is truly a wretched wretched thing#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley angst#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x oc#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley fanfiction#simon ghost riley fanfic#simon ghost riley fluff#simon riley x fem reader#simon riley x female reader#female reader#simon riley x you#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley angst#simon riley fluff#cod men x reader#cod men x you#reader insert#cod reader insert#cod fic#cod fanfiction#call of duty#call of duty fanfiction#call of duty ghost#ghost x reader#ghost x you#ghost x y/n#simon riley x y/n#simon ghost riley x y/n
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Hi, I read your post about Joong/Est & Dunk beef and I wanted to give you more information as I felt like you were missing some-- and bc I got to know them just 2 months and followed them on twitter and the things have been really insane? wild? and I just need to share.
So after Joong posted the tweet about him & Dunk not being on good terms right now, New(!) posted a reply to it "Is this okay?" (I assume he means is it okay to post such a thing?"). And after that Joong's tweet, I saw many fans who were unaware things have been weird btn JD finding out the two weren't getting along well. I'm not against actors sharing their feelings, but it really felt like a bad PR to me that hurts their branding. I was honestly wondering why GMMTV does not give their artists PR training when Joong suddenly posted a selfie of him & Dunk smiling with moustache filter and Dunk also posted a pic with him & Joong & P'tha who is CEO of GMMTV. AND Joong also deleted his tweet about the beef.
Now my unconfirmed theory is that after Joong posted that tweet, things got a bit out of hand and reached the ears of P'Tha and he made them sort of make up or at least ordered them to act more like usual, and for Joong to delete the tweet. In the event they had the next day, they were doing some fanservice too. It was very jarring to see the whole thing unfold tbh, especially Joong's emotional subtweets and retweets of shady quotes that lasted for weeks made me a little worried if he is mentally okay. I'm not sure JD are even on good terms right now (I don't think they are) - I don't know about Joong but Dunk seems to be trying to reach out like wishing him safe flight... but I sure do hope they can keep their working friendship or recover from whatever they are going through right now bc it would be really sad to see it end.
For Est/Joong, there seems to no visible movement for that side as far as I know except for both of their fans fighting each other like twice a week. They got into fight again today bc Joong doesn't even acknowledge or promote ThamePo even though he guest starred in it. The fan communities have been so toxic and weird and I just honestly feel so bad for the actors.
Anon, I turned off reblogs to this post except for the people mentioned within it because I just learned I could (look at this old dog learning new tricks!) and I hope this encourages you to come back to my inbox, anonymously, and offer more discussion without it getting muddled with others' thoughts.
Because I have a question.
But first I want to solidify one key point - I am invested in whatever happened between Joong and Est and, by extension, Joong and everyone else including Dunk. I just want to make that clear, so you don't think I'm trying to claim some level of emotional superiority with my following question because I'm not. I'm interested in everything you wrote because I'm nosy for no good reason, so I want to know what happened and all the details simply because I want to, and I want to make that clear before I continue.
Now, my question:
Why do you perceive Joong's behavior for the past few months as mentally unstable?
It was very jarring to see the whole thing unfold tbh, especially Joong's emotional subtweets and retweets of shady quotes that lasted for weeks made me a little worried if he is mentally okay.
You are not the first to write this. I have seen this sentiment in various spaces raised here with @waitmyturtles and @simysaru43, and on Reddit, so based on your comment, why do you think his behavior equates to him not being mentally okay? Regardless if he is or isn't, I want to know why YOU think that? And please know that I am genuinely asking anyone who has expressed this thought because I truly want to know others' perspective since I think his behavior is a suitable response to what is happening, whatever it might be (which, once again, I want to know what *that* is because I am soooo very nosy).
Joong is no longer friends (friendly?) with Est, yet they work at the same company; therefore, they must be around each other in a professional capacity. He doesn't seem to be friends (friendly?) with Daou anymore either. Yet Dunk, his work partner, hung out with them outside of work, so why can't he be bothered by that? People have stated it seems immature that he would dictate someone else's behavior, but I think we are underestimating the demands of their jobs and the unstated obligations they must abide by within their working relationships. Joong is an actor in a genre that is known for its (toxic) fans, so I am also surprised that GMMTV doesn't have a stronger grasp on any of its actors' social media presences, but Joong is also human, so having emotions, even public ones, is part of that.
So is the worrisome part of his posts that they focus on his emotions? Does it worry you that his posts are rooted in him publicly revealing his feelings? I'm not in the practice of defending men or their behavior, but I don't like the implication that a man feeling is cause for concern. That's why I'm asking why you are worried about him because I don't want to assume this is where you are coming from. I'm not asking for you to defend yourself or your comments because this is not a battle. I'm kindly asking for your perspective because my background (Mexican, Black, American) tells me this is messy behavior from a man, but my ideologies (feminist, anarchist, lover) tell me to be proud that he is allowing himself to display his feelings on a public forum.
But I might be missing something, culturally, generationally, or a third item I haven't thought about. Which is why I'm asking why his behavior is unsettling to you? I truly hope you respond, and if you want, I won't share your response.
Either way, let's discuss this further.
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2024 Round-Up and Review
2024, aka The Year I Discovered I Love Drawing Baz With Long Hair.
But also.
Honestly?
(Yeah, I'm going to be honest. Yeah, it's going to be a long post. Buuuut it's my blog, so here we go!)
This past year was rough. Really rough. In many ways as difficult as 2020, and in some ways, even harder than that. I lost my specialized medical care after 2023, and my health tanked in 2024. Medication changes, chronic illness/pain, and the hardest thing of all was... this idea I seemed to have that if I could just fake it enough, I could make it. Like I could deny my disability into non-existence. Pretend it away.
Instead, I ended up pushing myself past the breaking point, with the worst possible timing ever.
And THEN (when I desperately needed to stop and rest), I packed up my life and moved across a continent. (I hadn't moved since college. So I thought I'd move and it'd be done. That was wrong. Ahem. I'm still moving in...)
But the GOOD that happened last year came in the form of friendship. That's not just a line. My friends were my lifeline. To those friends who stuck it out with me even when things were far from easy, thank you. You are the most incredible people I know, and your friendship has given me reasons and opportunities to feel joy and hope where I might not otherwise have done.
Okay. So. The ROUND-UP is... *drum roll*... Under the cut!
At first I was a bit bummed to see I'd only finished 9 pieces of art during the entire year. But since I am being honest... I know I did my best, and so clearly the best I could do last year was nine pieces of art. So many of those pieces were attached to amazing projects, though! I got to do several collaborations with some truly amazing human beings, and I also got to run my very first fest for the fandom! So I'm calling it good.
Now, finally, the art links:
(I won't be including works in progress on this list, as I still hope to finish them at some point XD)
January: Oh my God, January. I didn't finish anything in January, but I worked on a lot.
February:
Tis better to give than to receive - This was my contribution to Erotic Grope Fest, and it was my first time doing anything NSFW. It's pretty tame, all things considered, but I think it still fit the mission. Also ended up posting a high-res version of this on AO3. Because. I mean. Come on. XD
March:
Three lost boys (found) - I started out as a beta reader for @mooncello's inspired take on Neverland, but by the time I received chapter 2 I was very nearly begging to be able to illustrate it. I'd had this particular image in my mind after reading the matching scene in chapter one, but had tried to suppress the inspiration. Silly me. I'm so glad I gave in. This is a favorite of mine.
April:
Keeping Neverland - (Technically posted on Tumblr in May, but on AO3 in April, so...) Illustrating @mooncello's writing again, and this one was a challenge! But one I wholeheartedly embraced. I wanted to echo Baz's journey as an artist with my illustrations, so where I used pencil sketching for the chapter one illustration, I went for a finished charcoal drawing, here. Digital charcoal, it turns out, can be just as difficult as the real deal. Slightly less messy, though. (I'm very proud of this finished piece.) Also where I continued my exploration of Baz's long hair. XD
May:
A rough sketch for a rough night - It feels a little off to be posting this sketch in my art round-up, considering the emotional inspiration, but truth be told I ended up liking this sketch quite a lot. I also learned a couple things, from both the events of that night (not my finest moment) and the drawing of the sketch (hey putting my feelings into art is a good idea). So I think ultimately this little sketch deserves to be included on this list.
June:
Teenage Dream - I posted this on Tumblr in June, for my birthday, but I actually did the art at the beginning of the year for the Valentine's Day exchange on the Carry On server. I rarely finish anything to this degree, and am immensely proud of it. That said, I ended up using it for so many things last year, I'd be okay to not look at it again for awhile. (I called it "Teenage Dream" because it made me think of a daydream Baz might have had as a teenager - now made real with Simon by his side. Cause I'm a sucker for their romance >.> )
Illustration from The Eternal Life of Baz Pitch - So I'm not sure how I got lucky enough to earn a special preview of @monbons's story, but I knew I couldn't read it in pieces. So she let me read the whole thing. It was very cool. I read it all at once I think? And when I was done I crashed Monica's DMs to yell at her about it. But then I drew this picture. (While I was chatting with her, even, and casually asking her about cherry blossoms so I could draw them the way she imagined them. It was very fun.) Now we're friends. XD (Check out the fic - now posted in entirety!)
July: Uh. Migraines. Just migraines. I had to pull back from the fandom a lot, and stopped participating in a lot of online activities. Boo.
August: Sketched concepts for CORB, and packed.
September: I moved over 4000 miles.
October: Everything I worked on in October ended up debuting in...
November:
Carry On Through the Ages! Okay, as stressed and sick as I was, I have no regrets about taking on COTTA. It was AMAZING. So much wonderful content! It was SO GOOD to contribute to the fandom, and to do that with history geeking? Dream come true. I also dipped into my previous area of expertise (picture manipulation) and did some cursed paintings to promote it. Mona Baz, Stormchaser Gothic, Mademoiselle Wellbelove, and Iconic Icon Simon.
A Prophesied Rivalry - Another dream come true was collaborating with @monbons for COTTA! I loved talking ideas with her, and she was so supportive when I hit road blocks, too. I love Ancient Egyptian art, and this was as much a love letter to that ancient art style as it was to my beloved Snowbaz. (I did a ridiculous amount of research to do this piece.) (And now I have Egyptian Baz and Simon in my new apartment. Extreme Bonus.)
Snow on Ice Illustration - Getting paired with @leithillustration for CORB was like winning the creative collaboration lottery. Not only did they grasp my concept from the get-go, but they've taken it in a creative and exciting direction. Also, we've become good friends, which is the very best possible outcome for a collaboration. (You should check out their story if you haven't already!)
(Snow-kitty also got very sick at the end of November, which halted a lot of my progress on some WIPs. It was scary for a bit, but I am so happy to say he has fully recovered.)
December:
Snowflake Exchange presents More Than a Footnote - I kind of love that I started the year illustrating one of @mooncello's stories, and ended it with an illustration from another! I was so excited to pull Heath's name from the proverbial hat for the exchange. I'd wanted to draw something from More Than a Footnote since the first time Heath told me about it. I completely love Dev and Niall at this point, so I hope to play with them some more in the future! (BTW Heath I think you're one of my muses hope that's okay XD)
SO. Yeah, the year was often a hard one, but a lot of good happened in spite of all the bad. The good was even more valuable for daring to happen in the midst of so much blah. (And boy howdy, did I get a lot of material to learn from.)
In 2025, I think I'm going to focus more on accepting my limits. Like, I can still work on improving my health and functionality, but I really need to try and determine when I need to stop. That has its own learning curve, but I have to start somewhere! I'm also working on vision therapy, which I'm doing on my own since I can't afford the out-of-pocket expense. Still... So far, so good. Fingers crossed!
Creatively, I think 2025 will be the year where I get to work on projects I started in 2023 and 2024, and I find that quite exciting because those are ideas I genuinely loved. I also hope to bring some other ideas I've had for a very long time to life. (Finally.) I hope, hope, hope! And hey, if I get to do more collabs? That would be awesome, too. (Carry On Through the Ages will be returning, as well!)
Thank you to these lovely people for tagging me in on this round-up, and for remembering me despite my frequent absence!
@emeryhall, @rimeswithpurple, @prettygoododds, @artsyunderstudy, @noblecorgi, @alexalexinii, @best--dress, @j-nipper-95, @roomwithanopenfire, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @imagineacoolusername, @mooncello, @whatevertheweather, @thewholelemon, @youarenevertooold, @monbons
And to everyone who is still tagging me on wipsday posts, other things, commented, any of that! Thank you. It means a lot to me. Hello's and How-Do's and general well-wishes to:
@drowninginships, @aristocratic-otter, @that-disabled-princess, @leithillustration, @bookish-bogwitch, @theimpossibledemon, @fiend-for-culture, @bazzybelle, @ic3-que3n, @blackberrysummerblog, @run-for-chamo-miles, @shrekgogurt, @confused-bi-queer, @hushed-chorus, @cutestkilla, @skeedelvee, @carryonsimoncarryonbaz, @wellbelesbian, @facewithoutheart, @ileadacharmedlife,, @raenestee, @supercutedinosaurs, @fatalfangirl, @palimpsessed, @martsonmars, @brilla-brilla-estrellita, @theearlgreymage
And anyone else who actually read my extremely long post. XD
#Here's some fine print#brought to you by my insecurities!#I know I talk about my disabilities a lot#and my vision difficulties#but that's because they are both relatively new additions to my life that sort of just waltzed in and took over my every waking moment#I'm trying to learn how to accept them and live with them without having to focus on them#becoming disabled is a whole Thing#Also my friends are seriously my heroes#Using voice messages and such on discord so that I can still chat is something I didn't expect anyone to do#but here you all are proving once again how amazing people can be and how generous of spirit#also if you're thinking “Boy you sure wrote a long post for someone who struggles to write” you're not wrong!#I learned some tricks#I hope to use them for fun stuff in 2025 >.>#year in review#fandom friends
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Love and Deepspace : Is Caleb Evil?
My brain is a mess. I just want to make it clear that everything I say here is my opinion and things I want/wish from the game along with theories and evidence based on previous knowledge of lore and personalities. I also want to add that I hope that the people reading this are going to have prior knowledge of the game, basic lore as well as what happens to caleb. So, spoilers for all of that.
This is just me barfing onto the internet because the trailer and Caleb is all I have been able to focus on for the past few days.
So, I have loved caleb ever since I played the main story nearly a year ago and I really really hoped that he would come back as a love interest and here we are! So, when we first meet Caleb, you know, he comes off as the "protective, trustworthy, older friend to lover" archetype. We have known caleb, as the MC, since we were kids. And clearly, as is in every childhood romance, I assume Caleb has always liked us. He seems very protective over us in the main story too he almost seems scared, like the way he says, "Who's going to protect you if not me?"
Caleb's trailer had me shook, and I mean that. To be quite honest, I did not like it at first. I was so overwhelmed I didn't even know how to process it. I made a whole blog post on his character trailer, please check that out to read further or later on:
Now, the second trailer, for the main story and new patch that is: has him behaving very... Yandere? Idk how to describe it. It's very strange (in a good way) but I think that's how it's meant to be, Caleb IS possessive, and I think even more so than Xavier.
But my point being: do I think Caleb will be evil? No, I don't. I don't think any of the love interests will ever be inherently evil, this is just my take of course. The devs seem to handle relationships in this game with maturity to have a love interest that's absolutely batshit crazy. No main character in this game has come across to me as black and white, they are all morally grey and that's so amazing. Also, they wouldn't introduce Caleb as the protective type to only make him something entirely different.
I think like all the other LIs, Caleb will have his own fatal flaw.
He was a sweet boy, the boy we grew up with and he had dreams of being a pilot and that was a dream he fulfilled but... I'm sure that when Ever found out that this is the path he has chosen in life, he was recruited into the Farspace Fleet to spy on the MC. And that is the moral conundrum here, he is stuck between having to choose. Of course, he wants the MC, he always has but he likely knows the dangers of being basically forced to work for Ever and what will happen if he chooses to quit, not only to himself but also to the MC, a risk that he doesn't wish to take. Ever is is really fucking powerful after all, they could kill him if he isn't useful enough. He's stuck here now, it's like how idealism shatters when you realise how corrupt the system really is.
He's extremely soft in the trailer too and my heart goes out to him really, he seems like he's always suffering or in pain, it's like he's reaching for the MC but he never can because of what he needs to do for Ever.
This isn't here for any reason in particular apart from how fucking soft he looks? His eyes... Omg, just look at how he yearns for her. Also, he seems to have thing for holding her wrist?
Caleb seems like he doesn't want to do this, he says in the trailer, "this nightmare will be over soon," and "I'll make things right" so it's cleary something that takes an emotional toll on him.
Now, I don't think if he will be evil but I certainly think that he's been portrayed as that because he's quite literally working for this world's umbrella corporation and I believe, his whole mean demeanour is a farce, because, well double agent and also the mind control theory I presented earlier. If Caleb is a villain in the Astarion sense, nature vs. nurture. Like how, astarion isn't really a villain, he can be MADE a villain like every other person because of things they have been through, I think Caleb has had to grow some thick skin to deal with shit he's been put through and that makes him come off as mean especially since his conundrum seems to be knowing that he can destroy MC and yet he still wants her, because he loves her. Ugh, my brain is spiraling.
I don't think it'll be a toxic in the slightest. I think yes, he is gonna be very possessive but not so much so that he conflicts MC's personality and nature, also the nature of the game itself. With a game like this, it's difficult to have a LI that's completely evil and black and white because, all their characters are very fleshed out and I don't know why they wouldn't make Caleb so. Caleb's battle also seems to be that he thinks he's decieving MC, that he isn't who she thinks he is and that difficult for him to cope with, like he's been lying to her all their lives and that hurts. He almost sounds angry at the MC in the trailer.
He seems as though he's trying to de-establish (idk if that's a word) the relationship he had with the MC in the past as a brotherly figure and instead establish one where she sees him romantically. Or, he's mad at himself but that is rubbing onto the MC for thinking he's a nice guy, reliable and always expecting him to be the best when he isn't. It's almost as if he's crumbling under the pressure of having to be the best for HER and for her seeing the best in him. I see a guy with deeply ingrained psychological issues, he seems to have a very low opinion of himself and thinks that MC's perception of him is based on a lie.
Not to mention that their reunion is gonna be extremely emotional and likely even explosive on the MC's part because, what the fuck? He just up and left, made us think we're dead and now he's... Well... Just different. There's the whole bite mark on his hand too so I assume the MC got into a huge cat fight with him but he calmed her down?
Either way, no matter what happens; I hope that they'll do his character justice and not ruin him, even if he is made a villain. I have trust enough in the devs to handle their characters with maturity and I can only hope the same with Caleb.
#caleb l&ds#caleb#caleb love and deepspace#caleb lads#caleb lnds#love and deepspace#lnds#l&ds#lads#love and deepspace theory#caleb theory love and deepspace#caleb theory#character predictions#love and deepspace lore#lads caleb#lnds caleb#l&ds caleb#love and deepspace caleb
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Can you pls do a fem s/o and Kang sae-byeok head cannons 🙏
a/n: HOLY SHIT OKAY. this is so terribly long and i'd be more than willing to write a whole fucking series about this if need be. i almost cried like... two times while writing this because it's so cheesy and perfect, and it gives sae-byeok the life she deserves!!
SO, popular girl!reader x basket case!sae-byeok highschool au.
you're genuinely so sweet but your little clique are made up of people with that aren't so nice to people like sae-byeok.
you aren't mean! a lot of people just so happen to like you and know your name! and yeah, they invite you to some of the biggest parties at your school, but so what? it's just a large gathering!
but sae-byeok doesn't know that, and honestly? she doesn't want to.
she's not looking for anything with anyone, especially not with a person like you.
think of like a cliche scene from a movie: you're walking in the hallway with your group of friends, and you pass by her.
you guys lived in two different worlds that were never meant to collide... and yet they did.
it was a simple formula really.
with it finally being your senior year (going by american school because i know nothing about the korean school system 😭), that meant new classes.
and you had absolutely no friends in this one.
seats were taken up by friends that had found themselves together, while you just stood there like a fish out of water.
but then there was sae-byeok, sitting in the back of the class by herself, lost in the world happening outside the large window to the left of her.
and she was beautiful.
the sun hit her golden skin just right, illuminating her dark, dragon-like eyes that look like they could pierce your soul if they wanted to.
for the first time in a long time, you're hesitant as you approach the long counter for two.
"excuse me? can i sit here?" your voice is quiet, sheepish, and when she finally looks up at you, all your blood rushes to your cheeks.
she takes a moment to scan the classroom, before looking back out the window.
"sure." it's blunt, curt, monotone, a collection of synonyms to describe someone who's not interested in casual friendly conversation.
the bit of light inside of you dims, but nonetheless you take a seat next to her.
it's awkward, but you turn your body towards her, putting on a cheerful smile.
"hi." you say hopefully.
all the girl does is throw a look at you out of the corner of her eye before looking away again.
"uh my name is," you tell her your name. "what's yours?"
"does it matter?"
"i would like to think so. were gonna be sitting next to each other for the rest of the year, so i'd like to get to know you."
she finally turns her head fully, giving you a once over before meeting your gaze head on. "I don't want to know you."
"oh." you say, taken aback. "well, i'll be here when you're ready then."
after that, she didn't talk to you much, but you were sewn into each other's lives, whether she liked it or not.
of course you noticed her; how could you not? she was the prettiest girl you had ever seen.
though she basically acts like you're not there, you know she's watching you.
sometimes you can feel her gaze when you're doing your work, or when you're taking notes. it's like she's analyzing you instead of just trying to get to know you.
then, the class project happens.
both of you are forcibly paired up, and you're not too sure how she feels about it. all she does is look at you and say, "it looks like were partners, now." in that dry tone of hers.
you're over the moon about it, but you really try not to show it, though you're sure your smile gives you away.
"i'll do my half and you can do yours -"
"or you can come over to my house after school to work on it!" you offer enthusiastically.
yeah, you're so fucking obvious.
she just stares at you before looking at the paper that holds the instructions on it. "sure."
"great, awesome... here's my phone number so i can send you my address."
"mhm." she hums.
"can i finally know your name now?"
"... sae-byeok."
having her over at your house for the first time was... overwhelming to say the least. you stress cleaned the whole house, your light pink room glistening beautifully.
it got easier afterwards though, seeing her.
she finally talked to you at school, and through the project, you had learned about her ten year old brother, and her parents.
she was still blunt and dry-witted, but it became easier to understand her little by little.
your old friend group had noticed your absence, you often cancelled on them to hangout with sae-byeok after school.
sometimes she'd even bring her brother with her, and that was the first time that you realized that she trusted you.
your feelings grew, even as the project deadline had passed and you both had presented and got a good grade on it.
a part of you worried that things were going to go back to the way they were, but pleasantly they didn't.
things were going good, with your head in the clouds and most of your time being taken up by your lover girl, you were sure nothing could get better than this.
then, you were stopped in the hallway by your clique while on your way to your class.
"you've been ghosting us." one of the girls said.
"don't tell us it's for that weird girl. you know she doesn't have any friends, right?"
"c'mon, you're just making yourself look bad by spending time with her."
their cruel words bounced around in your head, and you had finally had enough.
"it doesn't matter if she doesn't have any friends or if you think she's weird. i like her. i like spending time with her. that should be enough."
things got better after cutting off your group of friends, and if sae-byeok noticed, she didn't say anything.
she honestly forgot they existed because of how much of your time had been spent with her; at lunch, at home, on the phone, or at school.
the thing about sae-byeok is that it wasn't that she was bad at expressing her emotions, it's just that she did it in a way that was different.
like buying your favorite drink while she was out, or sharing her umbrella with you if you forgot to bring one.
she would chide you of course, but there was a part of her that preened at the idea of being able to take care of you.
it was strange, having these new emotions for somebody, but she can't say that it surprised her.
she knew from the first day that she met you that you were different.
it wasn't as if she had no idea who you were, she's seen you around with your group of friends before, had seen how they treated others, had even been at the tail end of their "teasing."
but every single time without fail, you'd be right behind them, scolding them on their choices to be mean to people.
sae-byeok found it a bit redundant, seeing as though you had still hung around them, but appreciated the sentiment nonetheless.
of course she still held a grudge, and had no ambition to actually get to know you at all as a person, but that didn't mean she couldn't look at you.
admittedly, you were very pretty; with your flowy skirts and tops, and your cute little adornments.
the outside matched the inside, and so when you asked her to go to your house to work on the project, she felt that maybe... just maybe, you were worth a damn.
and she was right.
she learned your little habits, what you found funny, how genuine kindness seemed to flow through you regardless of who you were with, especially with her brother.
now, sae-byeok has never cared for any school wide function: homecoming, prom, any kind of dances really.
she's never had anyone she's wanted to take, so what was the point of going?
but you seemed very stressed about it.
sae-byeok didn't want to be that kind of person, but you would tell her anything and everything, even if she had nothing to offer you back, so surely you would tell her if you had a crush on someone, right?
she didn't like the feeling of jealousy, how it bubbles under her skin like an itch she can't scratch. it makes her irritable, and you don't deserve that.
but why can't she just muster up the courage to ask you then if it bothers her so much?
you were stressed, because not only was it time for prom, but sae-byeok had been acting weird; blowing you off, missing calls or texts, seeming distant even though you weren't even a seat apart.
you had no idea what was happening.
did she have someone else?
you know she wasn't a big fan of sharing her personal feelings, but you thought you guys were close enough to talk about your love lives.
you wanted to take her to prom so bad it made your bones ache, but you were scared.
what if she said no? even though she never implied she liked girls, she never said she didn't.
what if you've been reading the last couple of months wrong? she had been a lot more caring with the way she did things!
she would occasionally bring you your favorite drink, or even pay for your lunch when you went out.
she had even gone out of her way to put her arm around your shoulder when you cried during the notebook!
it wasn't like she was allergic to physical touch but, you guys just didn't do that.
okay, maybe you've wrapped yourself around her arm while you guys had been walking a time or two, and yeah she's even held your books when she walked you to your next class, but those things could mean anything!
you internally groaned, your head falling backwards and your eyes landing on the ceiling above you.
"hey, sae?" you forced yourself to say, lifting your head up.
wide, dark eyes looked up from her book, attaching themselves to yours. a silent gesture for you to continue.
"what do you think about prom?"
she stares another beat before looking back down, seemingly uninterested. "i think it's stupid."
"oh," you nod quietly. "well, i'm thinking about going." you see her body stiffen before feigning relaxation.
"okay."
"okay." you reiterate, any courage you had dying as quickly as it formed.
your heart breaks a little bit when you pick up your own book, tears burning in the back of your eyelids that you rapidly blink away.
she was right, maybe it was stupid.
the night of prom isn't as exciting as you wished it would have been.
you still had a handful of friends that were willing to hangout with you even though you had been cast out.
they tried their hardest to brighten up your dim mood. they didn't know much, but they probably figured it out, seeing as though sae-byeok wasn't currently glued to your side.
being all dolled up made it easier to be sad, because at least you were melancholic in a cute way.
you had been looking at your phone all night, and yet there was nothing from her.
how was it that you could feel so lonely in a room full of others?
the gymnasium was swimming with people, crowds upon crowds of them stretched from one wall to the other.
the lights were off, the room illuminated by the strobe of colors from the dj booth.
the ground was covered in confetti and balloons, and yet all you could think about was how you'd rather be anywhere than here.
couples gathered up; hands around waists, arms draped over shoulders, and backs hugged.
you picked at your freshly done nails, peeling at the glittery pink gloss.
"hey."
your eyes tore themselves away to gaze up at... sae-byeok?
"sae?" you said in disbelief. "you came!"
she shifted in place uncomfortably, it was clear she was out of her element.
you took the time to get a good look at her, and when you did, butterflies erupted in your stomach.
she was dressed in a suit, her eyes smeared with a bit of dark shadow. there was no mascara or eyeliner to be found, but it was so imperfectly her.
"why are you sitting here by yourself?"
"i -" you shook your head, smiling sheepishly. "i mean - i didn't come with anyone."
"you look pretty." she says.
"thank you." you finally give her your award winning smile, which was adorned with a shy flush.
the music slows down and you gaze at her nervously. "did you come for me?"
"why else would i be here?"
"true." you reply with a laugh.
there's a beat of music drenched in silence.
"dance with me." she says with a slight demand.
"dance with you?" you ask dumbly.
"isn't that what you do here at things like this?"
"yeah - i... yeah i'll dance with you."
she extends her long hand and you take it, your already damp body heating even more at the feeling of her skin against yours.
you can feel people staring, and you aren't sure if it's because she's wearing a suit, or if it's because you're you and she's her, but in the moment, it's the last thing you were thinking about.
your arms find themselves around her neck, and her hands land on your waist.
you're alight with nerves, your body trembling in fear, excitement, and anticipation.
you both begin to sway with no rhyme or reason, and you swallow the lump in your throat.
"sae..." you begin. you can't look at her, so you focus on the black bow-tie on her delicate neck.
"i know this is probably going to ruin everything, but i can't hold it anymore. every time i'm with you, it hurts. it hurts because of how much i love you." you ramble with a disbelieving laugh.
you can tell she's stopped moving, but she doesn't remove her hands from your waist. they don't tighten or tug you closer, they just sit on your body like dead weight.
"i'm sorry i fell in love with you, kang sae-byeok." you finally look up at her, and there are tears in your eyes. "it was just impossible not to."
her eyes are wide, disbelief swimming in her irises; but there was also hesitation, fear. she didn't know what to do, or what to say.
"when i first saw you, i thought you were the prettiest woman i've ever laid my eyes on. even if you were a bit mean about it." you laugh again wetly.
you giggle anxiously, untangling yourself from her and shrinking into yourself in defense the longer she takes to respond.
"i - i get it if you don't feel the same -"
she cuts you off by grabbing your hand, tugging you with her as she begins to walk, the soles of her torn up black converse scruffing the shined flooring.
the music dies behind you when the doors open and you're walked into the starry night outside.
"sae-byeok."
"i didn't want to do this inside." she says and when she turns to you, her eyes are glazed over.
"don't expect a big confession from me, but i like you too." she's standing like she's on the defense.
it was your turn to be in disbelief. "you do?"
"i already said i did."
you just laugh once more, and shake your head. "i don't need a big confession, sae. i just need you. just like this. just like now."
you both have a long way to go, and who knows if this is forever, but you think that's just fine.
#✰ ― meau's inbox !#sae byeok x reader#kang sae byeok x reader#sae byeok x fem reader#kang sae byeok x fem reader#kang sae byeok x plus size reader#plus size reader#x plus size reader#x chubby reader#plus size!reader#chubby reader#fluff#fanfiction#lesbian kang sae byeok#sae byeok fanfiction#kang sae byeok fanfiction#squid game fanfiction
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I’m freaking out, I need to know!! Them cuddling in the motel?!?!? The car crash?!?! EDDIE GET YOUR MAN!!!!
Hopefully you've been enjoying the answers!
144 or 1k for ⚖️:
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Buck shifts over on the bed, mindful of Eddie’s leg. Eddie sits up, wincing a little, to try and meet him halfway.
“Just stay still,” Buck commands.
“Bossy,” Eddie grumbles.
Awkwardly, Buck leans over, and kisses him. Gentle, as the occasion calls for. Eddie’s lips are softer than Buck would have expected. He feels warm all over. Like he’s the one on pain medication. It’s quick, and soft, and when Buck pulls away, he can hear Eddie take a sharp little breath.
“Wow,” Eddie mumbles.
“Satisfied?” Buck asks.
“I love you, too,” Eddie whispers.
“Jeez, that good?”
“I already did… I’ve just… Only girls before, you know?”
“Yeah, it’s a mindfuck, huh?” Buck muses.
“Definitely.”
Buck carefully lays down next to him, closer than before.
“I’ll kiss you more tomorrow if you take your pain meds and go to sleep?” Buck bribes him.
Eddie chuckles. “Yeah, okay. Deal.”
Buck reaches for his hand and squeezes it. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Buck.”
ii.
They spend the next two days before Buck has to go back to work - while Eddie has to take time off - as a sort of family. Maybe not a sort of anything. Maybe just as a family. Buck likes the feel of it.
They take it easy. Eddie can’t do much. Plus, Chris just wants to be home. They order in and play games and just spend time with each other. Buck and Eddie are a little shy. Shyer than they need to be. They don’t want to be too open in front of Chris. Not yet at least. And also, it’s just… Well, it’s strange. To go from best friends to people who are allowed to kiss now. It’s not a simple switch.
But, god. Buck is happy about it.
He’s so happy about it. This is right. This makes sense. This is why nothing else was ever going to work out for him. There’s a fate, right? A somewhat determined future? He’s seen proof of that. Well, it’s Eddie. For him, it’s Eddie. It has to have been. It has to be, even now. He belongs here. Exactly here.
“I can’t believe Tommy poached you,” Eddie grumbles one night in bed, after a decent amount of kissing. Awkwardly positioned kissing, to avoid hurting Eddie’s leg. But still, pretty great, in Buck’s opinion.
“Okay, not to defend him, but you did have a girlfriend and never did literally anything about those feelings, so… Poached isn’t accurate,” Buck says.
Eddie huffs. “Still.”
“If only I could’ve seen the future then,” Buck says wistfully.
“About that…” Eddie starts nervously.
“What about it?” Buck asks.
“I don’t think I want you to look into mine at all,” Eddie says.
Buck stiffens a little. He’s told Eddie about everything he saw in Christopher’s future. The endlessness of the choices. The incomplete future, because of his age. How Eddie’s accident had been obscured to him. The only thing he hasn’t told him was about his little chat with Nemesis. How could he? If Eddie heard about that, he might never let him help again.
“Uh, you don’t?” Buck says.
“No,” Eddie shakes his head. “I get it’s a risk, but… Well, you can still do Chris. Make sure he’s good. But don’t you want some things in life to be a surprise?”
Buck sighs. “For me? Sure. But I want… I want to know the people I love are okay.”
“I know you do,” Eddie says. “So do I. But… I think I’m firm on this, okay? Especially if we’re going to be together, Buck. I want all that to unfold naturally.”
Buck smiles at that thought. He can see what Eddie’s saying. Honestly, he can.
“We’re gonna be together, huh?” He says. “For the future?”
“Well, aren’t we?” Eddie asks.
Buck grins. “Yeah. Yeah, we are. And, uh, that’s not said with future confirmation.”
“So, then?” Eddie prompts.
“I get what you’re saying,” Buck assures him. “You don’t have to worry about it.”
Besides, he thinks. If what Nemesis said was true, this will be better for him anyway.
iii.
Buck returns to work resolved to only help or punish strangers. No friends. No loved ones. He’s going to look out for himself. Even if anything could be happening at any point and he wouldn’t know about it. He wouldn’t be able to prepare for it. Change it. It’s fine. Totally fine. Nemesis warned him, right?
For the first few shifts it’s fine. He helps some call victims. Punishes another. It’s mostly not an issue at all. If he just lets himself live in the moment, most days, he finds he can sort of ignore that it’s a thing. He’s working, or he’s home with Eddie and Chris, and he feels fine. Good even. He’s not thinking about the doom he could be preventing if only he risked himself a little at all. Not at all.
When Eddie gets back to work, he’s on light duty for a while. Man-behind for a number of shifts. Relegated to the ambulance after that. Bobby’s taking it seriously, in typical Bobby fashion. Buck is glad. Even if when he’s the one injured it irks him.
They disclose to Bobby that they’re seeing each other. They’ve told Chris, and his enthusiastic response kind of gave them the fuel to amp things up. Buck has hardly been back to his apartment for anything more than more changes of clothing. Bobby doesn’t have a problem with it. Nor does he seem all that surprised. Is he seeing the future now, too? Damn.
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oh im obsessed with this actually… who ever wrote this one i am kissing u on the forehead and hugging you real tight… inigo is such a loverboy im kkkhhhhhhijnsdnfng
#ann plays awakening#EDITING TO SAY I STARTED TAG VENTING HIT READMORE AT YOUR OWN RISK#anyways#LAST LINE IS A KILLERRRR WOW#‘ann werent you just pairing olivia with thar—‘ OLIVIA IS A BUSY WOMAN OKAY#but also i just had this old save file from when i wanted to see pink inigo and decided to get some more supports#im obsessed actually like#ok tag venting time maybe this should be its own post but u guys know who i am#not only does this support in my very educated opinion do a good job at emulating inigo’s way of speaking#but i think theres also a very underrated characteristic he has that not a lot of people talk about and its that hes honestly quite morbid#him spending hours talking to and dancing with his mother’s grave is very beautiful and moving but it is also not a normal way to grieve#which makes sense because duh nothing about his life is normal but its j like. you know#if robin is his father (and maybe j the normal convo i dont remember) in the hot springs scramble he’ll insist upon bringing—#severed risen limbs home as a way to remember the peacefulness (lol) of the springs#and he thinks absolutely nothing of it!!#i think he gets attached to things just a little too intensely and because his life is surrounded by death how he expresses that can be#very interesting. and he talks about death all time more than the other kids#bc while a lot of their coping mechanisms are based in fear and the need to instill confidence in themselves (think cyn or gerome or owain#or sev or yarne or noire)#and how their SCARED of death and of loss and adapt different behaviors to act like theyre not (to varying degrees of success)#i think inigo is much more accepting of the fact that death follows him and has made it a normal presence in his life#which is not a good thing it means that he hasnt let himself grieve. he lets death hang over him and follow him instead of pushing back#also guess which one of the awakening trio in fates has the canonical story death. just by the way lmao#anyways bc im writing this in the tags on my phone i cant actually see what the hell ive been saying im j stream of consciousnessing this#but my point is that inigo has a weird fixation on death and dying that stems from his inability to make peace with death and grieve#and i think him idolizing death in this support (this BRILLIANT fan support that made me ill) is so in character and so lovely#i miss him so bad (hes literally in the photos im posting) grghhhrgah#i wuv him :(
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really fucking sick and tired of people who really fucking love the eddie book jumping on people who don't like or are even remotely critical of it's posts and like crusading their opinions around from the top of their high horses and shoving it down our throats.
if you like the book, great! that's awesome! love that for you! i am genuinely glad that you were able to find good in it and enjoy it!!
but not everyone did, and not everyone is going to agree with you. so, instead of going on some grand crusade where you find every single post that includes anything even remotely negative or negative adjacent or even neutrally critical and spending ALL this time and effort trying to provide unwanted rebuttals to every single thing, maybe you should just stay in your lane and find people who DO like the book and chat about it with them.
because i can PROMISE YOU, none of us appreciate it when you come onto our posts and start accusing us of "hating on" the author or "being rude" about her and her work and RIDICULOUS shit like that.
being critical of something and pointing out it's flaws is NOT inherently hating on it. i, frankly, do not know where people got that notion, but it's not fucking true so can we fucking quit assuming it is? and, critiquing something is also NOT the same as saying this is shit and it sucks and the author is a piece of garbage. again, where the fuck that came from is beyond me. you can be critical of something and still enjoy it. as soooo many of you love to point out, it's not perfect, why should it be perfect? so D U H. of course that means criticism can and should arise???
also. hot take (by which i mean ice fucking cold because it's NOT a fucking hot take), but going around toting FALSE facts as part of your "defense" does not make you or your argument look good. you, like the author, should maybe do a basic fact check first. 🙃
tldr, if you like the book, that's genuinely great, but stay in your fucking lane and stop seeking out posts from people who didn't like it to start shit in the notes.
#flight of icarus#stranger things#this has happened to me and to so many of my friends and im fucking SICK of it#i didn't even hate the book either!! i thought it was just okay#and yet i STILL get all these book lovers jumping down my throat about things i say about the book#things that - HONESTLY are not even like that scathing!!!!!#like god damn all im asking for is a little BASIC effort from the author and they all think thats me asking for her head on a platter#its NOT#i have no problem with the author#she's whatever to me honestly just a vessel through which the book was given to us#ALSO she is some nebulous blob way outside my orbit. AS IN any critiques i have of her and her work are NOT direct assaults on her???#like i dont fucking KNOW her#im not saying any of this to her face#she is a published writer she should KNOW the risks she is taking when she publishes her writing#not everyone is going to like it! there are going to be people who are critical of it! there are going to be people who hate it!#critiques and pointing out mistakes and wishing for things to have been different is not a fucking direct attack#those things are actually pretty fucking common responses to ANYTHING#and a lot of times theyre actually meant as useful helpful things geared towards improvement and not something to tear someone down with#some people on the internet need to go touch grass and learn how to CRITICALLY THINK again#the world is not as black and white as you think#n e ways. rant over. if you stuck around through all of that kudos to you. i am just. at the end of my rope with this bullshit.
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Hey about the ghost Luigi au. But. Would he fade with time? Or would he be forced to watch everyone’s lives continue without him? Would he be forced to watch his friends and brother die? Cause that’s angsty as hell my dude
oh, he’s in it for the long haul. i think after time has done its damage, he would go from being inconsolable to a long period of complete and utter shutdown. who knows, maybe he takes to scaring folks in the end. at some point, that becomes the only thing a ghost can really offer, right? when connection is that temporary it loses its meaning. the only way he can touch the real world anymore is through fear.
or you know, he could fulfill his dying wish and ascend to the afterlife. i want him to have a happy ending in one universe or another
#unfortunately luigi has always had very little sense of identity on his own#he relies on others to essentially shape him because he’s so deeply insecure. he people pleases impulsively you know#without mario he doesn’t even know who he is#once mario is gone luigi feels utterly sealed off from everyone. in an emotional sense#as far as luigi’s concerned he simply does not exist without mario#and like. i don’t necessarily mean that in the “luigi is mario’s shadow” way [although that’s a small part of it]#i mean that in the way that twins who are that close have extremely codependent souls#and you need them to live. honestly#this makes it sounds like i believe luigi has no personality or goals or principles which is not true. yes he IS his own person of course#and it’s not like he COULDN’T reach his own true potential and find peace and contentment in a lonesome life!#but i don’t think he will. he’s just not equipped for it and honestly? i think he’s so absorbed in the grief that he just doesn’t want to#it feels too much like moving on. and how could he ever really move on?#uh. damn okay. this is making me need to call my twin bro. this is getting me in the gizzard a bit /lh silly#asks#ididntwantobeaglader#ghost luigi au#no id#giddly’s art#i didn’t even make this art for your ask btw i just had it lying around and was like “OH this applies to your question!!”#thank you for the ask!!!
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Not aiming this at anyone specifically, but I’m genuinely so disappointed & annoyed at the fact no one in my real life circles bothered to reach out to me to check up on me regarding the recent Liam Payne/One Direction news.
#ignore if you want I’m just gonna vent a minute#it’s been over 3 days now & almost nothing#They know I was/am a fan of at least 1d or could take a pretty good educated guess if nothing else#& yet not one person who knows me personally bothered to ask if I was alright#And honestly… I’m not#I’m fucking struggling#it’s just so complex n confusing & I’m having a really hard time coming to terms with everything#I get it people are busy and have their own things going#& they probably don’t think it’s a big deal losing Liam as it was just a silly little boyband to them#but to me n to everyone who was there for those years it feels so so strangely personal#like a longtime distant friend has just been ripped away so tragically#& not only the tragic death of a person but the death of your adolescence & all the innocence of that time#the end of an era that had so much joy n significance in your life#& I know it’s probably not easy to tell I’m upset bc I keep my emotions pretty much exclusively to myself (thanks autism)#but honestly it’s just so invalidating and isolating to not have anyone to talk to#I already feel so completely alone in general bc no one ever checks in with me n stuff like this just solidifies that#I just don’t think it would have been so difficult just to drop a quick message to say ‘hope you’re okay’ or ‘thinking of you’ at least#it would have made a difference#& I know this post isn’t gonna matter to anyone but I just had to get my frustrations out somewhere bc it’s weighing on me a lot#anyway if you got to here thanks for your time n I hope you’re doing okay!!#feel free to reach out to me if you ever want/need to ❤️❤️❤️#wow that was a lot#personal#Kirsty talks#my posts#my stuff#1d#Liam Payne#one direction
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Hey ladies! People with uteruses, women, AFAB people, however you'd like to be called. It doesn't really matter for this post; all that matters is that you have a menstrual cycle, because that's what affects this particular thing.
Also, be prepared for extreme cringe. I swear I have a really good and positive point to make here, I just happen to be cheesy and sappy and it rubbed off on this post.
So, today I read a couple comments online and felt a little inspired to make a post that I would've liked to see when I was in my teens. Here's my little nugget of wisdom:
You know the little bump on your stomach? That part that always seems to be missing in photos of women's stomachs and drawings of female characters? It's not always missing, we're getting better about that as a society, but you know what I mean. The little bit of fat that sticks out and makes your stomach seem less flat than you think it should be. I call it the Chub.
A lot of teenage girls spend their time in front of a mirror wondering if this is normal. "Is my stomach too fat?" "Do I need to exercise more?" "Am I eating too much?"
And believe me, I know what that's like. In the ninth grade, while enduring extreme bullying, I spent many weeks skipping meals a bit more than usual because I didn't know my body was normal. I thought the little bit of fat I had there was from laziness and gluttony, and not something natural. And mind you, I was already underweight. My frame and body type always makes it seem like I'm malnourished even when 115-135 pounds is a natural weight for me and people in my family. But during that time, I was trying to get my weight down to 100. It didn't help with the other thoughts in my head, thoughts that were telling me the world was better off without me. So I kept going without food, trying to get my weight down.
In the end, I survived. I was okay. I started eating more and moved to a better place, where I met some great friends and got a fresh start at a new high school.
But teenage me didn't know that it was normal for a teenage girl to have a bit of fat on my stomach.
How many teenage girls are out there right now, wondering the same thing without knowing how natural and healthy it is to have that extra cushioning on their stomachs?
If there are any teenagers reading this post, please remember this:
The Chub is completely natural to have and is even a sign of health!
It has a special purpose too: protecting your vital organs, especially the reproductive system. It's meant to keep what's in there safe, regardless of whether or not you intend on using that system. And it's completely normal to have, in fact, most AFAB people develop it around puberty!
(Quick side note: natural doesn't necessarily mean universal. Trans men often lose the Chub during HRT, and trans women gain it. Also, not every AFAB or transfem person will gain it in the first place.)
So then there's probably a nagging question in your mind: what size is a normal size for the Chub?
It's a little complicated, but that's only because the size fluctuates so frequently throughout your life that the answer doesn't lie in a one-size-fits-all type of deal. Especially since the reasons for why these fluctuations happen are varied among individuals and rarely universal.
So, here's a quick and easy guide to All The Things That Affect Chub Size!
The Chub may seem larger than usual if you put on a little weight over, say, a long break (which happened to me a lot in high school), or if your cycle sometimes comes with a bit of bloating or weight gain. Sometimes the Chub will get bigger just because you had a nice meal one night, and by the next day, it'll be small again. Stress can also make the Chub larger, just like how stress affects your menstrual cycle.
Your cycle- and, by proxy, the Chub- can also change due to the season or time of day, or even whether you've moved to a new place, made changes to your diet, or started a new big thing in your life.
The point I'm making is, the Chub will change a lot throughout your life. It's not going to go away, and it's not something you can get rid of by exercising or starving yourself. In fact, trying to get rid of extra fat like that- the starving, I mean- is extremely unhealthy and will only cause more pain for you. Exercise is good in moderation and with care. As long as you're doing it safely and not because you want to lose weight you don't need to, that's fine. But that won't get rid of the Chub either, because you'll still have it- just in the form of abdominal muscles that become more prominent as you exercise.
(This is not to say that overweight- or worse, obese people should not exercise to lose weight. I'm just saying that unless a doctor says you need to exercise to lose weight, you shouldn't be trying to lose weight by exercising. You don't need to lose the weight in the first place. Getting into shape could help make you feel more confident, though, so if you're exercising for that reason, go right ahead! But again, moderation and care are important. Make sure your body isn't suffering while you do it.)
And remember: the Chub is normal. Having a little extra cushioning anywhere is normal. It only becomes a problem when it's a threat to your health. Trust your doctors first and foremost when it comes to healthy weight. They know what they're doing, and if you really do need to change something to lose weight or anything like that, THEY WILL TELL YOU. Otherwise, you are fine.
Conclusions:
You are beautiful if you have the Chub. You are beautiful if your Chub also includes stomach rolls. If you don't have a Chub, that's fine, too! It's also okay if your Chub is a little small, or a little big. And it's okay if your Chub isn't limited to your stomach.
A little bit of fat is healthy, no matter where it is. The golden rule is, as long as it doesn't affect your health or well-being, it is okay to be a little chubby in some places.
And finally:
You don't have to love your Chub, but you should always remember that it's important to your health.
Take care.
#body positive#body postivity#sooo... i really need people to see this and hear what i have to say but idk what tags to use#any ideas?#sorry if this sounds like someone just fishing for clout#i honestly just think people need to know that it's okay to be a little chubby#sigh
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Nothing more frustrating than having a dream set in an amazing book series and then waking up to find out it doesn’t exist. Guess I’VE gotta write this now
#it was so INTERESTING and vivid. i woke up like ‘i swear i’ve read this’ but it doesn’t actually exist#okay so the setting was this world where the moon has cracked in half (potentially due to human intervention idk)#the tides have gone super weird because of this#the majority of humans live at basically the tops of really really tall buildings. like at high altitude#at the lower levels; it’s just water. the lower down you go the humidity increases also#so as well as the humans who live at the top of the world there are vaporous species living at the mid level and there are mer-creatures#in the sea. god knows how agriculture works in this world. i know people had rooftop gardens#maybe everyone had adapted to a vegan diet or maybe there was trade with the mermaids to get fish. idk#anyway; the majority of my dream was concerned with this elite university academy and this one problematic student named alex#he had been sentenced to life imprisonment for basically insulting the government (this was a very totalitarian regime that had formed when#the world first cracked and everything went to shit)#but he would be able to get his sentence overturned if he took this one class (i think it was civics or politics or something#with a media focus) and basically created the best propaganda video imaginable#so they were basically requiring him to recant his claims publicly; endorse the government; and he had to do it so convincingly#that his video would be rated the best in the class#the other people in the class included these two sisters who also badly needed to pass in order to graduate#and a bunch of exchange students#also the sky is basically a television in this world#everyone is up so high that they can see the moon fractured in two and it’s Really close to the earth#but you can’t see much else in the sky. so they were doing shit like beaming everyone’s class schedules and syllabi and lists of what you#need to buy for class directly into the sky#i don’t know if i’m selling it but it was so INTERESTING. i was really annoyed when i woke up and realised i couldn’t actually read this#because it doesn’t exist#APPARENTLY i have to write it. which is worrying because i’m not at all good at worldbuilding. but honestly the dream was so vivid#i can basically just.. take it and expand on it very slightly#i think what interested me was the backdrop of this elite university that all the kids of rich family go to vs the obvious reality#of this world; where there is food scarcity and very little diversity of habitats. and a dictator#personal
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tired of being called boring cuz i hate toxic ships </33 im sorry i get triggered easily by stuff like that brah, the most toxic my ships r allowed to get before i get triggered is a lil possessiveness and a hint of unhealthy codependency 🤭 beyond that, i literally get sick to my stomach lmao..
do what u want but anyone whose never been abused before does NOT get the right to call ME boring for not liking abusive ships..
#i just think too many people equate them not liking something as it being inherently bad.. why dont we all just shut up.. lmao#do ur thing tbh like if u enjoy reading it and dont condone abuse irl then go ahead#i just will not participate and thats okay bro like we dont all have to like the same things#be an individual bro like we dont all have to have the same likes and dislikes#why do i have to read comments on all my fav fics about how theyre tired of things being 'too fluffy' LEMME ENJOY MY LOVELY FLUFF#if i get a comment like that on one of MY fics it is literally over i will die#anyway..#okay this is a little fib cuz i am also a huge fan of the cannibalism as a metaphor for love thing. um.. let me have this LMAO.#romanticizing cheating is something i just cant stand though ngl#honestly i dont know why i like toxic codependency and CANNIBALISM but having an affair is where i draw the line..#i think consent is my issue like i need there to be consent or its over and i cry and throw up from reading it lmfao#i like toxicity when its because they love each other TOO much.. THATS IT.. NO MORE CHEATING NO MORE ONE SIDED ABUSE NO MORE#i will continue to enjoy my super healthy fluffy protective ships 5ever#meows post#fanfic#ao3
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