#i have autism and every kind of disability
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
i want my guts to turn inside out
i am so done
i hate myself forever and ever
how do i live with hating myself because that's where i am right now and i can never get back/better. i'm just gonna close that door on myself forever now.... because i dont deserve it and i never deserved it.
anything that i was telling myself to feel good was a lie.
i seriously dont even want to be Here^TM
but i feel like i''m forced to be...
drunk as all hell. awkward, trying desperately to cling to a life that i dont even want anymore.
He is gone forever and my lack of presence in his life weighs on me. LIke,,,,,,, but doing that same thing to other people???......... not the best. but like.... He did it :'} and plenty of others too.....
view from halfway down.
#:'|#sorry *eye roll forreal because oops. made yet ANOTHER mistake*#i dont keep true to myself#and i honestly dont even want to#with the way that things have turned out for me thusfar#because of what i could have done#because i am a coward#grieving forever possibly#i love being fucking sad#well i got what i asked for#egggeeegegegegegggegegegege weeeeewooooo ffffffffuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnn#wwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee#fuck it#i have autism and every kind of disability#i am completely disabled#being a drama queen gives you that all for 1 deal.#spectacular#jeez#i want to go to the next world so badly#lolol#next world engraved in the dirt#i am beyond finished with this crap#if i get to a good place one day....... idk how i done done it tbfh#i have no confidence in myself after the kind of friend IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII have beennnnn#cuckooooooooooo#take it all#i dont care#i am an empty shell of a human now#zombified#i dont want to be around others because i am contageous
0 notes
Text
i have to wonder what super hardcore militant vegans think should be done about obligate carnivore animals, because in all my painfully-rapidly-approaching-30-years i've literally never actually seen anyone give a clear consistent much less halfway feasible answer on that
#mostly i've just seen like “how dare you ask questions you just want an excuse to murder you're sealioning ect”#or worse some vague and wildly improbable nonsense about like. fake robot animals covered in beyond meat or something equally convoluted#which is a thing i did see someone suggest as a serious answer#i mean i already know they think i'm a genetically inferior hateful vampire that should starve to death for the greater good#because my exact combination of health conditions make meat basically the only semi-safe way i can get close to enough nutrients#i know this because they have repeatedly told me that i'm either evil or should be sacrificed or both#and yelled at me for asking questions by bringing up the whole disabled thing and then they're like#“a lot of vegans i know are advocates for disability!” as if that ever means jack shit in the society that results from anything#no matter what you do a vast majority of people in any given society will *not* be advocates for the disabled. i'm sorry they just won't.#and what do you think public perception of people who physically can't survive like that is going to skew towards#in a society founded on the belief that non-vegan diets are evil?#at absolute best we're looking at being a heavily marginalized class generally seen as something like vampires and our existences taboo.#(as if these type's own insistence that they should be allowed to harass and shame people doesn't disprove their assertion that we won't be#thinking it could possibly go any better than that is a fucking fairy tale. human nature doesn't work that way.#you simply cannot eliminate the human desire to designate and abuse a class of have-nots. the absolute best you can do is mitigate damage.#take it from someone who's been multiple kinds of disabled and chronically ill all my life. people will not “just”. ever.#i get this even from people who are otherwise very aware of and VERY GOOD at avoiding this sort of thinking#“i'm a disability advocate!” no you are not. you are a poster. my experience has taught me that what people advocate for in their free time#means precisely jack shit for how they will actually act when faced with the situations they make otherwise rational posts about#and the fact of the matter is even if you somehow really are the perfect disability advocate a majority of people WILL NOT BE YOU.#a majority of people in society will be margrat from accounting who clutches her pearls when she sees the gays and thinks autism isnt real#and who has never had a nuanced thought in her life and actively does not want to#a vast majority of people in your Vegan Utopia will not be you and your friends who march with wheelchair users and volunteer at the shelte#a vast majority of people in your Vegan Utopia will be jenny who starved 8 cats to death on broccoli because she can't be bothered#and who thinks that “carnivores” are actual nazis and don't deserve healthcare because she saw someone say that online.#ALWAYS assume your society will be made up mostly of the worst kind of person it can because it WILL ALWAYS BE TRUE and you can't change it#most people seek the low-effort option. and evil is most often banal and low-effort.#i'm just so fucking tired of every single even vaguely lefty-adjacent political movement simultaneously acting like i don't fucking exist#and at the same time that i need to be sacrificed to achieve Utopia. god. at least conservative whackjobs are upfront and honest about#how they think that i'm a burden on society that needs to be Eugenics'd . rather than trying to morally gaslight me about it.
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh btw i went to a new neurologist a couple of days ago
the visit itself was awful, he didn't let me do it alone even though i legally could and insisted my father come with me, which meant i dissociated throughout the whole thing and could barely breathe
but um! anyway! he didn't find anything in particular but he did order a brain+cervical mri
so that's going to be our next fun experience ig
p.s. does anyone who is autistic/needs to stim a lot/has trouble staying still/is afraid of loud noises have any advice on getting through a mri? i am a bit worried tbh
#i really hope there are no needles involved#also kind of scared of the noise#and the idea of having to be still for so long makes me want to die#but uhm yeah#that's progress i guess??#i'm just afraid that they won't find anything and that i'll be denied further testing#i can't deal with these perfect results in every test and exam anymore#chronic pain#chronic illness#chronically ill#disabled#disability#joint pain#brain fog#as always idk anymore#autism#actually autistic
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
saying this here bc my teacher will never find it here
william . [i grab him in one fist and crush him]
#william is my painting teacher#i have never hated a class more in my entire life#my ableist 7th grade science teacher whose class i always passed out in was more bearable#i’m about to have my second painting related breakdown of the week which doesn’t seem like a lot but it lasts all day#i hâte this i genuinely cannot stand sitting here working for hours knowing my work is gonna be torn to shreds anyway because i’m a beginner#and i’m not good at painting because it’s not a part of my fucking career path!!!!#gamma’s static#vent#last week i had a meltdown DURING CLASS because i just could not understand this#and he was like well yeah it’s hard it’s hard for everyone but you can do it#fuck you fuck you fuck you it’s not hard for everyone it’s not people can finish their paintings before they leave class but it takes me#over two weeks shit the fuck up#/nbh#my self esteem has not been this slow since i was hospitalized#hospital mention#i cant even get help from disability resources because i need a written proof of diagnosis to get ANY kind of accommodation. i don’t have#that for my fucking dehabilitating depression and stomach issues so i guess i just have to wait until i get an autism evaluation and i have#no idea when that is and i’m just so fucking tired i can’t fuckinh do this every week for the next 4 months i’m going to snap!!!#nobody’s gonna help me unless i have proof that i’m fucked up and my hospital’s gi WONR CALL ME EITHER SO I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
i hate it when people bully people less smart than they are. but i HATE it when people bully people less smart than i am on my behalf.
#fuck all of you im not even kidding#the other day#my math teacher was teaching me separately some harder material after i finished my classwork for that day#she said “you like to think. unlike *gestures at the rest of the class*”#i swear i nearly fucking punched her#i lost every drop of respect id had for her as a teacher in that moment#i know why im ahead. and its not bc everyone else is stupid or lazy.#im ahead bc i was very fucking lucky#i have more than enough free time to dedicate to schoolwork and i had a fucking fantastic education before high school#you know why?#bc i come from a family that could AFFORD that!#i know this bc ive spoken with and watched my classmates#i know whats up. its not their fault.#they have to babysit their siblings instead of doing homework. they have to work instead of study for the tests.#they were educated by a fucked up american school system#i am very privileged to be as ahead of the curve as i am this was not my own doing#even if it was due to my own innate capabalities it would STILL suck!#if this was because of some kind of natural talent that cant be taught i think the teachers behavior would be even worse!#i PERSONALLY know people who struggle in school bc of adhd and dyslexia and autism and other learning disabilities#its not THEIR fault and they shouldnt be fucking BLAMED for it#maybe you should cut out the making fun of stupid people please#i have infinitely more respect for a kind idiot than for an asshole genius#three pigeons in a trench coat
1 note
·
View note
Text
THE TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION HAVE ISSUED AN APOLOGY AND A RE-INVITATION. HERE IS MY STATEMENT
hello buckaroos. the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION have issued a formal statement and apology which you can read at the attached link.
while i find the language used to discuss what was done a little unsatisfying, i would like to start by saying i appreciate anyone taking steps to prove love is real and make things right. the genuine feeling of ‘realizing you have made a mistake and hurt someone else’ is a terrible one, and i have so much empathy for this group as they reckon with their choices causing harm. i appreciate their apology.
i also think more good than bad has come from this situation. i am so thankful this happened to me (someone with a large social media presence) and not a smaller buckaroo author without the means to stand up for themselves. i think the next time someone comes to the TXLA with an accommodation need, they will hopefully be taken more seriously
lets trot down to business about specifics now. the TXLA has re-invited chuck to the original panel and even offered to take a moment at the top of the panel to talk about what happened. this is very kind of them and i will say THANK YOU.
unfortunately i will also have to decline.
the fact that it took this much effort, social media backlash, and discussion to let me simply EXIST PHYSICALLY in a way that is authentic to myself is not a good sign. if this organization immediately questions an authors chosen presentation in this manner, i cannot imagine what my other accommodations would be met with.
sometimes i am at an event and i very quickly need extra space to breathe. sometimes i am at an event and i need special guides to help me along from place to place. these are not ‘big asks’ and every other conference has gladly provided them, but if the TXLA had this kind of initial reaction to my physical appearance, i cannot imagine them readily helping with my other needs without ‘proof’.
this is clearly not a safe place to trot for those who require additional accommodations. regardless of any apology, their ACTIONS have shown that people who appear unusual or unique are not welcome at this event on a subconscious level. i believe the TXLA have some serious inner work to do beyond this apology, and i believe this inner work will involve actions more than words.
but even more importantly i would like to make this very important point: IT DOES NOT MATTER IF MY MASK IS A DISABILITY AID OR NOT. i appreciate the way this discussion has allowed us to trot out some deep talks on autism and proved love in this way, but i think there is a much more important point at hand.
regardless of WHAT someone looks like, it is not the job of an event or conference to pick apart WHY. physical presentation can be a part of someones neurodivergence, or gender, or sexuality, but i can also just exist as a nebulous undefined part of their inner self. it can be a piece they are not ready to openly discuss yet. the guests at TXLA are authors (aka ARTISTS) and the idea that a conference dedicated to an ART is going to deny people with unique and unusual presentations for ANY reason is absurd. since when are we applying a ‘dress code’ to our artists?
without knowing it, i personally believe there is an element of the ‘good queer, bad queer’ phenomenon going on here. there is a push to say ‘LOOK we accept these marginalized groups and cultures’ but behind the scenes that means ‘we accept these marginalized groups and cultures who are quiet and speak in turn and wear the metaphorical suit and tie’. it is easy to show diversity when you only take on the voices that arent too ‘strange’.
to prove my point i ask you this: do you think orville peck would have FOR ONE SECOND been asked to perform at the texas library association event without his mask?
so with that i say ‘very sincerely, thank you, but i will have to decline the re-invitation. maybe next year’
6K notes
·
View notes
Text
i have an overwhelming amount of hatred for autism research because all they fucking care about is finding out the "cause" of autism. i am so sick and tired of having to educate every single professional I encounter about the barest basics of my disability I am TIRED.
Someone please just do a study that's like "Sensory overload is a thing for autism and it has these effects! This is how long it can take to recover! This is the kinds of things that can set it off! This is how it affects the ability to function!" Please please please I am tired of trying to explain to people that sensory overload doesn't immediately stop when the stimulus is removed and that seriously overextending my processing of stimuli will take multiple days to recover from.
Neurotypical folks don't have any intuitive sense of what things will cause sensory overload and a limited concept that this is different for every autistic person. Why is there no recognition of the need in research to define the scope and variety of autistic people's struggles so clinicians can actually help them.
No, the researchers are too busy studying social behavior in fucking zebrafish to discover the "autism gene." Autism speaks and its ilk can die in a fire
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
So the ADHD Handbook post struck a chord with a lot of people...
I don't think I have it in me to write the book I suggested, mainly because most of what I want to write about is variable by situation. I can't actually offer a magic formula for getting a good assessment, all I would be able to do is say "Here are the warning signs, here's my personal story, shit's just rough". Which I could do but it'd be basically an entire book of "shrug emoji". The best possible way would probably be to offer it as a workbook, like "Here is a page for you to record every communication with the clinic doing your testing. Here is a page for you to write down possible other approaches to getting your medication if the pharmacy is out." etc.
I do think I might write it as a novel of some kind. Possibly even a novel about someone writing a handbook, I haven't decided. I had a dream last night about the book, in which I saw a woman watching a revolution taking place in the distance, thinking, "This is not what I intended when I set out to write a self-help book." Baller way to start a novel, honestly.
Anyway there were several suggestions for books in the notes, so I thought I'd compile those here. I have read none of these, so I can't vouch for their contents, but I'm including what my readers said about them.
@blogquantumreality linked to How To ADHD by Jessica McCabe, who is a well-known ADHD youtuber (I haven't found her videos super helpful but they're also not aimed at me). @knitsinweirdplaces added "The last section of the How to ADHD book is literally called 'how to change the world' and exactly points out we can advocate for a more disability friendly world that traumatizes ADHDer less in the first place. It's the only book I've read that hits the balance of 'your brain has immutable challenges' and 'these strats may help' right. Bonus, it is inclusive of people who use adhd meds and those who don't/can't."
@theindefinitearticle mentioned "I read how to keep house while drowning recently and it's been much more practical for me in terms of actual usable advice." This book has also come up numerous times during National Clean Your Home Month as a helpful guide to cleaning.
@buginateacup said "The year I met my brain is the only one I've read that actually felt like it was making useful suggestions for living with ADHD."
@cabloom said "iampayingattention on Instagram wrote How Not To Fit In."
@grison-in-space said "Do you have any idea how over the top excited I was when I found I Overcame My Autism and All I Got Was This Lousy Anxiety Disorder?"
@doubleminorforroughing wrote "Please read Devon Price. He wants to tear it all down and I love it." I will add that I don't think I've read Laziness Does Not Exist but I have read Price's shortform work extensively and I think he's been very influential in rethinking how we frame laziness and productivity in relation to both work and neurodivergence, so I can second the recommendation.
783 notes
·
View notes
Text
The Assembly sees a cast of thirty-five interviewers who are autistic, neurodivergent or learning disabled, question an A-list celebrity for one extraordinary TV interview.
In this half-hour special, it's multi-award-winning actor and director, Michael Sheen, who is to face the grilling of a lifetime from the unique collective. No subject is out of bounds, no question is off the table.
On subjects as diverse as ex-girlfriends and on-screen kisses, to the OBE he gave back or his favourite motorway, how will the Good Omens star fare as The Assembly bring their unique approach to the celebrity interview?
The Assembly cast is a diverse cast ranging in age from eighteen to seventy-seven, amongst the group are musicians, artists, writers and students. Each will take their own approach in their attempt to get to the truth of Michael Sheen like nobody before has- whether that’s finding out his favourite sandwich filling or how he felt when his daughter was born.
The format is an adaptation of French show Les Rencontres Du Papotin, which saw the likes of Emmanuel Macron and Camille Cotin (Call My Agent) face the neurodivergent journalists of the Papotin. Gone was the flattery of the usual celeb fare – in its place, a mix of mischievous prodding, leftfield quizzing and profound exchanges. The superstars left completely off guard: actors asked about a driving ban or the death of a parent, the President asked if it’s really the behaviour of a role model to marry one’s teacher.
The show comes from Michelle Singer and Stu Richards' Rockerdale Studios, creators of mischievous content which seeks to put disabled agency at its heart. Stu is also known for co-creating and writing the BBC Three comedy, Jerk, and Rockerdale are most known for Channel 4’s Mission: Accessible.
Rockerdale Studios has worked closely with the BBC’s Creative Diversity Team, to ensure every element of the series works for and with autistic and neurodivergent voices.
The Assembly is a half-hour special to celebrate Autism Acceptance Week. Expect profound revelation, glorious chaos, and a lot of laughs.
The Assembly airs Friday 5 April, 10:40pm on BBC One and iPlayer
Interview with Michael Sheen
What made you say yes to being a part of The Assembly?
I said yes to being a part of The Assembly because it was just such an extraordinary and interesting idea. Then reading about the original French series, it just sounded so extraordinary, different and potentially a very revealing way to approach the tried and tested interview process, but obviously it is a lot more than just being an interview. The interview part of it is just one aspect of the project and I think there is still a lot of confusion, ignorance and fear around people with any kind of difference. I think being able to be involved in a project like this could maybe break down some of those barriers.
How is this different from any other TV show you’ve been a part of?
It’s very much unfiltered and that’s really exciting and quite nerve wracking for that reason! So much on TV is sort of smoothed out and filtered and made safe and this, certainly in the making of it, felt very not that! All the better and more refreshing for it too. I know a lot of work is put into the research and preparation for a show like this, but in terms of the actual questions being asked and the experience that you have in all being together when you’re filming, it feels very unpredictable in a really good way and really lead by the people taking part, which is terrific.
How did you feel going into filming?
Well I didn’t really have anything to go on, so I was excited. Sometimes when I’m going to be interviewed, I know what the interview is going to be about, I have a vague idea of the questions that will come up, I know the sort of things that I need to get across about what I’m there to talk about. But with this, I really had no idea what I was going to be asked, so I had to be prepared for everything and anything, there was a kind of freedom in that I suppose. Because of the unfiltered nature of what was going to happen and not being able to anticipate what might be asked, it was a little nerve wracking yes, but I was mainly just very excited!
Did your experience differ from what you were expecting and if so how?
Well I didn’t know what to expect really, so it’s not that it wasn’t what I was expecting because you can’t expect anything! There's no way you can expect anything because you just don’t know what’s going to happen, and because it is so unfiltered and unpredictable in terms of what might happen, where things might go, how people might be feeling on the day. For all the difficult questions that got asked at times, it just felt very loving and joyful and that everyone was very happy and excited to be there even though people were nervous or had anxiety at different times. There was a genuine feeling of community and I felt very welcomed into that community and ready to play so to speak, and you have to be ready to play. I felt very safe and looked after and it was just really, very funny as well – there was lots of laughter and wonderful things that people asked, responded to and performed, I mean I wasn’t expecting all of that, that was just wonderful! So many moments that I’ll never forget.
How does this compare to any other interview you’ve experienced?
It’s so unfiltered! The closest thing I can say is The One Show, where you go on to talk about one thing and then they ask you about everything else that’s going on on the show, so you get a question about your favourite bus route, then they ask you about otters! There’s an extraordinary pinball effect of questions and that’s the closest I could describe, but The Assembly is that x100. It really is extraordinary and that’s very unlike any other interview I’ve done really, usually everything is meant to follow on logically and have a kind of smoothness and polish to it, and this is just really raw and unfiltered and uncensored and I love that, I thought that was wonderful.
What can viewers expect from the show?
I imagine it will be very funny and I think quite moving. I was quite moved at times by seeing how much people had to struggle to overcome certain things they were dealing with in order to ask questions at times. That was uplifting. I think it will be different, it will be thought provoking I hope, and challenging in certain ways; challenging certain kinds of myths and stereotypes I think and ultimately just really entertaining and fun and joyful. I can’t really remember what I said, so I don’t know what people will learn about me... but it’s not about me, it’s about that fantastic group of people, but I certainly got a huge amount out of it too and I hope an audience will as well.
405 notes
·
View notes
Text
i will never ever stop thinking about the disability allegories in gravity falls. i cant ever stop thinking about disability allegories in other media and gravity falls is no different. im feeling chatty today, so lets see if i can articulate all my feelings on the matter.
the most interesting thing that stuck out to me with thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com was this snippet on fords medical paper:
we hear about this kind of attitude towards disabilities often, maybe you have heard about autism being referred to as the "next evolutionary change in humans." we can especially see this when a person has a disability, but is also very capable in other fields. there are so many cases in the medical or educational field of a child having specific needs, yet they are ignored due to them being "gifted".
in a vacuum, ford's extra finger may not be considered a disability, the sixth finger allows him more movement and dexterity, and ontop of that, he's a genius. its just an extra finger right? its not like it hurts him. but it does hurt him. he is a child living with a limb difference, he is constantly ridiculed by his peers. they call him a freak and physically harass him.
this is where we dip into the social model of disability here. i know sometimes that can cause a little bit of discourse, but i think its interesting to note here! please if you have a limb difference feel free to add your perspective or correct me where you see fit. if you don't know what the social model of disability is, its the perspective that disabled people would not be as limited in their abilities if it wasn't for the oppressive society that they lived in(think people in wheelchairs could do more things if infrastructure had disabled people in mind). ford wouldn't be experiencing abliesm in his life if limb differences were something people were educated about. then we get to bill cipher. in theory, his ability to see the 3rd dimension is almost a super power. but in the book of bill its literally stated that it is illegal for anyone to mention the possibility of "up". he is forced into abusive medical practices where he is being drugged to suppress his ability. no one in his dimension has the same perspective of him, he is completely alone, and even worse, the people who should be protecting him like his parents and doctors are abusing him(not that his parents are evil for this obviously. they don't have a choice and i assume they want what is best for him, what were they supposed to do? yet it still had this horrible impact on bill).
this social model can be applied to bill cipher. he has this ability that in a vacuum would be considered amazing, but he lives in a society(rip) that oppresses this. they have to, because bill trying to let his dimension see the stars killed every last person. which makes me think that whoever was in power here probably knew this would happen. its unsure if bill cipher knew the true extent of his damage would be, but i am of the belief that he didn't know how bad it would really be.
i just find all of this very interesting. i really love when a story tackles a topic such as disability. its so obvious this is what alex hirsch is going for and its such a unique take that i don't see often in media, as a disabled person myself. feel free to lmk your thoughts :)
#gravity falls#stanford pines#bill cipher#gravity falls discussion#gravity falls theory#???#the book of bill#book of bill#thisisnotawebsitedotcom#marlstext
327 notes
·
View notes
Text
something that I think would be, truly one of the worst things about the yandere Batfamily really truly is their power to make any and every problem you've ever had completely go away in no time at all
it can be such an awful feeling to see that you struggled in vain with something that was nothing at all to someone else. You could have significant issues that have followed you all your life and have had traumatic impacting effects on you and these people could come in and sweep that all away. Student loans you've been paying off for years, if not a fraction of your lifespan, still burying you in debt? We are talking fucking decimal points on the scale of Bruce Wayne's wealth. That bad leg from an old work injury? Let's grab you one of the best doctors in Gotham, if not the entire world, fuck, we may even get you a doctor or medicine that isn't even human-made! Y'all want a magic leg? We know this chick who can speak backwards, you want a magically healed leg?
Crippling loneliness? Eternal sunshine and objectively best Robin Dick Grayson is here to brighten your entire world since he knows what it can feel like to be hurting and alone and he's literally like the heart and soul of the entire manor besides Alfred
Chronic pain, an undiagnosed disability, or maybe you're not confident in your fitness? Jason has extensive knowledge of injury recovery, physical therapy, and overall knowledge about human biology and musculature and how everything correlates
Family issues? Daddy issues? Let Resident Troubled Kid Expert Alfred Pennyworth be your new grandpa. He's dealt with more than one temperamental snappy individual, and he'll use his patience, experience, and wit to wear down all your stress and hostility. It's hard to keep being cruel to someone who's nothing but kind to you, and he has plenty of patience and delicious baked treats to hold out until you give in
Honestly just the fact most of them are so fucking young would get under my skin. You could be approaching your 30s and be sitting here at the Wayne family dinner table as their weird sister/mom/girlfriend/whatever and being all "I've just always had these struggles my entire life, I dont know what's wrong with me, I feel like I can't control how I act or feel and I hate it" and someone like Tim who depending on the source material and where you are on the timeline is a literal teenager with extensive knowledge of criminals and psychology is just over here, "oh, that? You have chronic childhood trauma, recurring resurfacing conflict related ptsd, severe abandonment issues, emotional regulation problems that are probably biological, and also you probably have autism, and there's nothing wrong with any of that :)" and then he turns to Bruce and starts talking about how his school is taking a trip abroad to Greece while you sit there processing that everyone around the table has extensively psychologically evaluated you and you probably have your own file on the Batcomputer (you do. It's excessive.)
It's just. The psychology of having all these problems you've struggled with be wiped away by someone else like it's nothing and how, that can result in making someone feel all the more worthless and helpless. Oh, Bruce was able to just make all your problems disappear? Clearly YOU weren't trying hard enough. Tim is able to suss out what's wrong with you? Well YOU'RE the dysfunctional idiot who was born wrong, and YOU were the one choosing the wrong doctors. You're watching all these young teenagers or young adults be vigilantes and travel the world and learn multiple languages and you're like. Normal guy Steve from the grocery store. You know? They take control of your life and make you feel like a side character in it, because everything you do is now attached to them, and all of them and all of their adventures are so... spectacular
And really, someone with a meaner heart, and maybe someone more blunt like, say, Damian, could perhaps come in and make some comment, "see? This is why you needed our assistance in caring for you" and what are you gonna do, NOT act like they basically fixed your entire life in less than a year's time, with the one objection of kidnapping and imprisonment? You're just over here, "um yeah, actually, I'm an adult and I can take care of myself, you don't need to TAKE CARE OF ME???" meanwhile Bruce and Alfred are exchanging knowing looks while you speak as if the old butler hadn't needed to help you call your doctor and other important urgent matters because being on the phone with strangers gave you such intense anxiety. Ok yes sure honey you are a lovely functional adult and your brain is big and beautiful and perfect 🥰 now shut up about going to live back home on your own, go play Xbox with your new brothers or go bake something with Grandpa while the world's greatest detective sits down in the Batcave using the Batcomputer to track down and "have a friendly chat" with that one childhood teacher that gave you that one really specific trauma-
560 notes
·
View notes
Text
It is incredibly difficult to hear so many people in the environmental movement continually lionise trains as the answer to all transport needs.
Being a full time mobility aid user with chronic fatigue and sensory overload makes use of public transport nightmarish.
If *real* efforts were made to make every train and every station fully wheelchair-accessible, *without* having to rely on unreliable or downright abusive station staff to put ramps up and, down, it would be a fantastic *start*. On good days, I *might* be able to use it for certain kinds of journeys.
However, it still wouldn’t solve the issues with sensory overload, or the problems getting to train stations from my home due to severe chronic pain and chronic fatigue.
If overdo it when I’m out, I *crash*. I cannot expend all my resources getting places. I then cannot do anything when I am there, and am unable to get home safely.
This is not that uncommon a problem. My issues are due to hEDS, POTS and autism, but they are incredibly common symptoms of Long COVID and ME/CFS resulting from Long COVID. So, unsurprisingly, folk with these needs are becoming increasingly common as Covid continues to rampage through the population. *Some of us need transportation we have control over*, and we need environmentally sustainable options to do this.
While expanding the public rail network, making it completely affordable (or, realistically, free) and making it fully accessible for wheelchair and other mobility aid users, children travelling alone from about age 8, elderly people with limited eyesight and hearing and parents travelling with infants would be an *incredible* start and massively increase usage of public transport, there are those of us who will always need at least part-time access to vehicles which can come to our homes and that *we* have control over, that are just as affordable as public transport, and the environmental movement needs to acknowledge this, plan for it, and stop treating it as selfishness, laziness and all the other “fun” terms disabled folk face constantly just for trying to live, especially outside our homes.
This is going to be even more the case if you want us to be able to work outside our homes and if you continue to be resistant to providing fully remote jobs that pay a living wage.
#a queer crip grows#trains#public transportation#disableism#systemic disableism#inaccessibility#inaccessible public transport#disability#sustainability#heds#pots syndrome#autistic adult#inclusive environmentalism#long covid#me cfs#mobility aid user#wheelchair users
207 notes
·
View notes
Text
I think part of why communities autistic representation with Abed is so good isn’t just how it portrays the symptoms and experience accurately, but also how it conveys plot lines and story arcs about the different types of people and interpersonal conflict an autistic person would face. Community definitely isn’t the first show to have ableism as a conflict, but in my experience of watching stuff it’s the first show I’ve seen that has such a nuanced approach to so many different types of ableism and different realistic reactions and solutions (all while being a sitcom with a cast of morally corrupt characters and absurd fantastical scenarios).
Frankie Dart for example, who is introduced in season 6, is kind of that level headed business woman archetype, conveys that she has a lot of experience with disabled ppl in her personal life, and (as is later confirmed) a lot of affection for them bcus she has a sister with a high support needs disability. This draws her to Abed, being that he’s autistic, and the two begin and understanding and friendship. Frankie is very kind and unusually understanding and compassionate towards Abed and his needs, and communicates with him in a way that is refreshingly easy for him to understand. And at the same time, patterns of infantilizing and condescending behavior begin to occur in their dynamic, until eventually Frankie outright says that abed “doesn’t know any better”, conveying to him that she thinks he’s too disabled to be aware of what he wants and believes, or to make his own decisions without someone who knows what’s best for him to guide him. And the great thing is everyone who witnesses her say this is disgusted 😭🫶 she is berated bcus everyone who knows abed knows that he is a grown ass man who doesn’t need to be hand held or condescended to.
But what’s so interesting about this conflict with Frankie is that she does earnestly mean well, she’s not a one sided abliest villain, she’s a person who could really exist. What is conveyed is that Frankie infantilizes abed bcus she has an expectation of autism that does not apply to every autistic person. She assumes that bcus her sister has high support needs and needs help making decisions, that abed is the same way, bcus she thinks all autistic ppl r like her sister and acts accordingly. And then she learns that this is wrong, and abed is fully capable of functioning without her help. It’s great! There’s no moral speech about how autistic ppl aren’t babies or anything like that. Frankie means well, fucks up, and is forgiven when she changes her behavior.
I just love it bcus ableism and other forms of bigotry aren’t often portrayed with so much nuance. Ableism isn’t usually this big thing, most people r on some degree abliest, and a lot of the time people who have a lot of experience with disabled ppl and mean well (especially ppl with disabled family or siblings) end up having the most abliest biases, it just feels so real.
124 notes
·
View notes
Text
youtube
i just stumbled upon this video and it feels life changing enough that i'm not only going to try it out myself, but i'm also going to share a written summary here!
PROBLEM: routines are especially difficult for anyone who has fluctuating energy and motivation levels from day to day (this often includes people with ADHD, autism, mental illness, and disabilities)
SOLUTION: having three options for a routine according to your energy and motivation levels makes it easier to be consistent, even if you're not doing the exact same thing every day
THE METHOD:
(the video and this post uses a morning routine as an example, but this technique can be used for any kind of routine)
list all the things you would ideally like to accomplish on a perfect day. this is the list she includes in the video:
(imo this is a lot of things! your list might look different and that's ok!)
this is your IDEAL ROUTINE. personally, i'm going to call mine the two spoon routine because 1. 'ideal' sounds a bit moralistic to me and 2. she specifically says that this is NOT the routine you'll be doing the most often. this is the routine you'll do when you wake up feeling the most energized and motivated.
next, you're going to make a second version of this routine. think of how you feel on an average day and get rid of the things that you don't generally have the energy or motivation to do. this is her list:
this is your MOST-LIKELY ROUTINE. i'm going to call this my one spoon routine. this is the routine you'll probably do the most often. it's for days when you're not incredibly energetic or motivated, but you feel relatively decent.
next, you're going to make one last version of this routine. think of how you feel on a bad day and get rid of the things that you don't generally have the energy or motivation to do. this is her list:
this is your MINIMUM ROUTINE. i'm going to call this my no spoon routine. this is what you'll do when you wake up with no energy or motivation. she also says in the video that if your minimum routine is simply having a bowl of cereal to fuel yourself, that's perfectly okay and so much better than not getting out of bed for hours and/or leaving the house without eating.
remember to be realistic about what you'll have the ability to accomplish for each of these! you can always add more things in the future, but starting off with too intimidating/strenuous of a routine will prevent you from being successful.
134 notes
·
View notes
Text
Giving the x-men disabilities so they can suffer like me
I just think it’s cool how much people can relate to the x-men in marginalized groups no matter the group. Just like how they’re all gay, POC, religious minorities, etc.
Cyclops- Scott Summers
C’mon this is the most autistic man to ever autism
He’s got model plane sets and shit around his otherwise empty and perfectly cleaned room with the sheet corners tucked in and everything
He stopped stimming because of O’Diamonds and Sinisters abuse but started again when he got more comfortable with the o5 team. He definitely does flappy hands
He probably hyper fixated on an obscure engineering subject
photophobia- light sensitivity
Idk if it’s cannon or not but it would make sense with his brain damage and all (plus I have it and I’m projecting) it’s also an autism symptom so double whammy- his glasses will help
Migrainous stroke- basically stroke with migraines. It ties into brain damage and photophobia with migraines which would make so much sense. Frequent strokes too? Fuck yeah let’s highlight how his childhood trauma and overwhelming power effect him- how mutant powers aren’t always good.
He should have really shitty vision- canonically colorblind- wears glasses all the time so low light, his eyes basically fucking glow. This man cannot see for shit
“cut the red wire cyclops!” “They’re all red!”
Storm- Ororo Monroe
She’s canonically claustrophobic but it’s really only used as a once in awhile plot device
I think it should tie into anxiety a lot more
Ororo is the kind of person who uses a planner to manage every aspect of her day so she’s never caught of guard
She’s got only one timer set up to take her meds instead of 10 like the rest of us (she’s simply better)
She would have actual panic attacks that don’t end the second she’s out of a confined space. Full run-
For her a panic attack would cause a lot of derealization. She doesn’t feel like she’s in her body, she feels out of control, like she can’t breathe, dizzy, both hot and cold at the same time.
Nightcrawler-Kurt Wagner
syndactyly- fusion of fingers or toes. This is basically cannon. He’s got 2 big fingers and toes so like no explanation really needed. He’s got it even if it’s for different reasons.
This greatly effects his ability to do certain things- our boy can’t use a controller can he? How’s he meant to play Mario cart with the rest of the team ):
Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome- bendy bones and stretchy skin that causes lots of joint pain
He canonical has bendy bones so like this is also half canon. Plus I’m giving my blorbo chronic pain to project.
Pretty sure there’s a Spider-Man with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome too so that’s very slay.
Rouge- Anne-Marie
Hear me out- HPV It’s the whole- “I can’t touch anyone” thing
She was born with it
It causes a lot of pain for her but she hides it around people she’s not comfortable with (so really just unmasking in front of remy and her family)
Also stds just need to be a lot more normalized. And her having to be so weird about people with it fits so much with the whole “ew mutants” thing
Xavier
Yeah yeah he’s a paraplegic
They should be better about it though. No more of this curing him so often he’s like the one famous character wheelchair bound people get
Stop making him so weak, he runs a school to learn how to kick ass, man can probably box, who needs legs. They always just make him useless once someone kicks over his chair or something
Chronic migraines again
Listen hearing all those thoughts all the time can’t be all sunshine’s and rainbows. Make him suffer (this goes for all telepaths)
Gambit- Remy Lebeau
He canonically has brain damage (via lebeatomy) (haha get it)
He’s getting hit with migraines too. Making all these losers suffer
He probably also has very bad vision because of his eyes- probably not very good with light just like cyclops (likely worse)
I’m going to give him the worlds worst period cramps via dysmenorrhea. Yeah he’s trans to me I’m a romy t4t Reuther
Rapid fire listings let’s go!
Jubilee canonically has Dyscalculia- like dyslexia for numbers
Wolverine canonically has memory issues and ptsd
Magneto canonically has ptsd
Legion canonically has multiple personality disorder or DID- dissociative identity disorder. It’s not always portrayed the best but rep is rep
Angel canonically has hollow bones- I’m gonna gc him with osteoporosis
Headcanoning Madelyn Pryor with post partum depression
Scarlet witch gets head cannoned half of all the mental disorders- depression, psychosis, ptsd, and anything you wanna give her. Girl needs a staff of therapists, psychologists, and a cocktail of pills
Quicksilver gets headcannoned with ADHD. Boring I know but I’ve got it and it fits him so projection time
Let marrow have ptsd. Girl witnessed a genocide of her people and her moms death as a child. Why do they skim over that? Girl is suffering
Pyro canonically had the legacy virus which was like a big euphemism for AIDs so he gets that. Plus he also gets hit with the autism beam
Toad is autistic. No further questions
Jean grey gets the psychic migraines but I’m also giving her autism cause her relationship with Scott is nowhere near neurotypical. The biggest disability marvel gave her was liking wolverine though. He canonically smells like shit and is an asshole. I love him.
Kitty pryde gets type 1 diabetes- I cannot explain why it fits her it just does
Cable gets lupus cause he canonically had a fantasy space tech autoimmune disease so let’s just make it more realistic
Daken gets lactose intolerance (he’s fine because he doesn’t really actually eat dairy)
Iceman gets lactose intolerance (he’s not fine because he loves all things dairy)
Dust gets celiac disease
#xmen#kurt wagner#nightcrawler#rouge xmen#logan howlett#madelyn pryor#pyro xmen#dust xmen#cyclops#scott summers#charles xavier#disability#ororo munroe#gambit#remy labeau
79 notes
·
View notes
Text
Please help a disabled (seeking disability) trans woman keep her apartment!
Hi everyone, my name is Delia, I’m a 25 year old trans woman with several disabilities, such as ADHD, possible autism, BPD, depression, anxiety, CPTSD, chronic fatigue, et cetera. I need real help in order to keep the apartment that I fought so hard to get. I am seeking disability right now, but it is going extremely slowly and I don’t know when I’ll see any help from the government. Let me explain a bit of my situation.
Medicine has never really worked for me, and I recently decided I needed to come off wellbutrin because it was making my anxiety a lot worse, as well as depleting my ability to really feel anything at all, so my doctor recommended I stop and try a new med. I can’t afford to go to the doctor very often so I stopped the medicine a month ago and am going back in September to try something different that will hopefully help.
Essentially, I live in income based apartments and lately, my disabilities have been either preventing or seriously hindering me from getting to my job. I used to work basically full time at my deli job and it became too much due to me being burnt out for like the last 5 years, so I had to cut down. I work three days a week now, and it’s already becoming too much again because of said perpetual burn out and medication withdrawal. I have either been missing work entirely or been late every single day, and they haven’t fired me yet but I fear the worst is coming soon.
Right now, my rent is $372, my water bill is already behind, power bill still needs paying, and I only have ≈$100 in my bank account right now. I am planning to yard sale both this Friday and Saturday, and next, and get some more cash before it is due, which is on the 10th of August. On the 10th, they will serve me an eviction notice to get out by the 20th unless I can get the money.
I am asking here if anyone could spare anything, any amount is immensely appreciated. I have been on my own for a few years now with little to no support, and I've always despised needing or asking for it, but the fact of the matter though is that this is my last Hail Mary to save my sinking ship, and I'm desperate.
I know most folks here are also struggling though, and I hate to make this post, but I am kind of at my wits end in regards to keeping this apartment. This has been my first somewhat stable home in pretty much my whole life and I'm terrified of being forced to move yet again. If I can just get this month’s rent paid, I will be able to find a new, more tolerable job in the meantime while I am seeking disability benefits, and then hopefully keep the ball rolling.
Any amount will help, I am honestly begging and I will appreciate anything anyone can spare, be it a donation or a share.
Update 8-12-24: so we have made some good progress here and I am thankful. Sadly some unforseen expenses had come out, so not exactly where I'd like it, but it is coming along. I've just got 8 ish days left to come up with the rest though, so. I am considering selling my Playstation, and that was unconscionable previously, so things are fairly dire.
V3nm0: @Skellish
C@sh@pp: $Skellish69
Goal: $372
Current: $110 / updated: $190, (still need $182)
#transgender#signal boost#transgirl#actually adhd#donations#pls help#fundrasier#disabled#fundraising#skelli scribbles
141 notes
·
View notes