#i dont like this that much and wish i could somehow fix it but i cant and im very tired

[skaluli]

wasnt gonna post this until i was happy with it but that was weeks ago and its either i post it now or medic dies in the files

[hollow-vok]

Ohh im obssesed

[girlthingdecay]

.

[realnielsbohr]

i hate being stressed about like. things that are actually stressful. normally i could be like "all is well 😌it will be ok no matter what" or whatever but i genuinely cant do that here. if i dont get this sorted out im genuinely fucked

[tortademaracuya]

Nvm i changed my mind it was stupid i was being stupid everythings stupid

[thebigqueer]

its so funny to me that she was like 'you deserve better' because little does she even know she genuilnely was best. like no one is ever going to top her. and i know with my full heart that she will find better than me and im supposed to want that for her but i really really dont. cuz i know theres so much better than me but theres no one better than her

[starreyblueberry]

I always wonder how every fairy sees Timmy and his family. I mean, Timmy goes to fairy world every other day, he walks along the bakery and shops, and talks to fairies like their old friends. Sometimes he's out with Cupid, fixing whatever Love mishap seems to be roaming around. Sometimes he's with the toothfairy, as she squishes her cheeks but runs off to her next client. Sometimes he's even with Jorgen, its rare that a godchild is able to spend time with the head fairy, but somehow Timmy has many found memories of him, even if a lot of them are Jorgen yelling at Timmy. There are small TV clips of him playing on the air sometimes, as fairies gossip about him and his godfamily. If your a fairy, you've somehow been affected by Timmy Turner, for better or for worse. No ones really mad at him though, in fact once you meet him he's quite a sweet kid! "Oh he's not that bad- he just needs a push in the right direction!" "He saved fairy world like multiple times!" "Timmys a very bright kid" "Sure he's a handful but what kids arent?" You can hear chatter about him all across town, and whenever he was at Fairy world, it felt very normal. It was a custom almost, to just treat Timmy like anyone of them, but with a bit more care and love since he is 10 after all. What was bewildering at times though, besides the fact he's practically a resident, was his fairies. It wasn't hard to notice- especially if you've seen it first hand. His pink and green godparents seemed to dote on him like he was their own child! Many fairies have seen Wandas attentive eye on him, making sure he never gets hurt. Thereve been times where hell just carry Timmy around fairy world, especially if he's tired of walking. Its a care that, you don't really see from Godmothers. Most of them, while they do treat their child well, they don't take them to fairy world every other day, and talk to them on such a personal and deep level. Cosmo was a different story, his recklessness has put fairy world on the brink of destrction, its a wonder he's a godparent. Timmy doesn't seem to care though, whenever Timmy and Cosmo are together laughter can be heard, as if Cosmo would do anything to keep Timmy happy. Its a very sweet sentiment, and their closeness is one that hasn't been seen. Usually you could see the small fairy baby in Timmys arms as well, calling out for Timmys name the moment he wakes up from a nap. Its a very endearing sight, they even call each other brothers! Loving a human as a fairy is very, very unheard of. Whether it be romantic or familiar, or even in a friendship, Love with a human is terrifying, due to their mortal lives, and the rules that are set in place. Humans can almost never know about fairies in the first place, only children. Even then they are doomed to forget, so attachment is seemed as unnecessary pain and agony. Its knocked into every fairies head again, and again, and again.... but when Timmy apphered, with stars and wishes in his eyes, anyone can tell just how much Cosmo and Wanda loved him. How Timmy would always say I love you to both of them, how he's called Cosmo and Wanda his best friend, hell a few faires have sworn he's heard Timmy slip up and call Cosmo and Wanda Mom/dad one time. This type of bond is unknown, even the fairy council were perplexed when seeing how close they all were to each other.

Fairies dont seem to care though eventully, especially as Timmy comes over to their world more and more. Why keep him miserable when he's obviously so happy to be here? Thats why so many fairies have that little acklowdgement of his actual family, that he's basically been adopted as a fairy, and while everyone dreads the day he turns 18, whats a few more years of just making this kid happy.

[clouds-by-me]

𝓐 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓸𝓻𝓼 𝓙𝓸𝓫

Characters ;; none specified Warnings ;; Angst kinda Word count ;; 618 An|Just some random thing I came up with

The creator doesn’t get to rest.

Work. Help. Lead. Repeat.

There’s not much more to it.

Works wordlessly on papers, and reports from each nation, and it continuous prosperity. Works about resolving issues with the growing activity amongst the monsters of the land.

Help the creations, they can’t seem to do anything on their on when your around. They want you to make the crops grow, and stop the rain from falling, but don’t they need rain for the crops to grow?

Lead meetings about meaningless acts, and harmless threats. No one is in danger, they just have a small cut, nothing a few bandages and medicine can’t fix. You tell them that too, yet they insist that only you can stop the problem at its root.

Then you repeat it all again the next day. For days on end, you can’t seem to get a break. You tell yourself that you love these creations that you made, you try to convince yourself that you do. Yet every time you get close, they come back with another issue.

No peace, no breaks.

Meaningless work with a title on a throne, thats all it is.

At some point they'll learn, at some point they’ll understand.

They have to. Otherwise, how will these creations survive?

Now as you sit on your throne, several documents done, several people helped, and several meetings led, done and over with, all you can do is wait.

There’s no point in asking for rest at this point. Every time you get just a bit of relaxation, someone comes in complaining about something.

“The crops aren’t growing fast enough”

“Monster activity is on the rise”

“Its raining too much”

“Our crops need more water”

“The soil is now too moist, could you make it rain less”

it drives you crazy. They ask for the answer to one problem, then can’t figure out the answer to the next. You give them hints, suggestions, anything to at least keep their needs at bay. Yet somehow they always come back for more.

Things started to get worse the more they asked for things…

“Your Grace, please, we need your help. Liyue is having a shortage of Mora!” As you think about it, that doesn’t even make since. How does the Nation, that is home to Morax, the Archon who made Mora, having a shortage of Mora? Of all things. It could’ve been anything else, but Mora? How is that even possible?

“Your Grace, the air in Monstadt is becoming polluted! Can you please fix this?” The air, in Monstadt, the Nation of wind, and freedom, is polluted? What does that even mean, how is that possible? The air there is supposed to be the freshest, and most kind of all! How did the air start to pollute anyway?

“Your Grace, the water levels in Fontaine are lowering by the day, and less and less fish and carbs are appearing in the water!” The Nation, is quite literally surrounded by water! What did they do for the creatures that are native to that region to suddenly disappear! It just doesn’t make sense!

It seems like the more they ask, the more needy they become. You wish that you can just send them away, make them figure it out on their own.

But you can’t.

You’d be abandoning your duty as the creator, and your responsibilities of helping and protecting Teyvat. It’s the Creators job, to work endlessly for power hungry, greedy, creations.

What breaks do you get, when you’re the Creator. Even the most powerful dont get breaks. The claim to love you, yet want so much, and give nothing in return.

Theres a reason the creator gets no breaks…

[gamblersdoll]

I think about Guts resting under a tree after a battle, and in the lake in front of him, a naked reader bathing in the lake’s water, So he can't help himself

nsfw, shy reader

I ♡ u 🤭

masturbation (m) , blowjobs, guts is a little feral in this so. guts point of view.

i have to lay down, somewhere, somehow.

maybe i did overdo it this time. i never realized how much swinging or effort it took to swing this sword around. yet, it feels like i accomplished something from it. yeah, i did— i protected her. i protected the love of my life. the strongest woman i knew– no, the woman who made me feel like i was worth something.

my eyes look up, finding a large tree. shit, thats a big ass fuckin’ tree. but it can work. i feel myself lay against it, my muscles finally getting the rest they probably deserve. i look to my missing arm, the bionic metal replacing it. fuck, ill have to fix it or some shit. my eyes can close, finally.

a rustle of water is heard, what the fuck was that? my eyes shot open, looking over and around the entirety of the landscape. not this shit again, i just sat the hell down and im still being bothered—

oh, its you—

the water ran down your body, fuck. you look too damn good right now. can i even stand? well shit, did you even know i was here? probably not.

did the water feel warm, beautiful? i hope it does, the way your body just relaxes into it. and the way you let the water run through your hair, you look like a goddess, beautiful. never seen anything like this, at least not for a long while.

fuck, now another muscle is aching. all because of you. first i protected you, now i want to fuck my fist just to see you wash your body.

and it seemed like the water had some type of effect on your skin, it looks like your own worries or ponders washed away when the water hit the curve of your back. please— please dont moan like that.

my arm moves on its own, pulling my cock– the cock i wanted inside of you out, slowly but tightly pumping the length. shit, i need you. needed you all the fucking time. dont you know that? probably not. sometimes you werent the brightest color of the flowers, yet you were still the most beautiful, and elegant one.

shit!—

“oh shit—“ you hurry to get your clothes, but i waved my hands, hoping you wouldnt. “im sorry, i didnt see you..” its okay, my beloved.

my lips crash to yours, hand and metal curving around your body as it feels too good to even pull away. your small hands, fuck were they soft and tiny, they curved around my neck. please, please keep touching me.

your smaller body kneeled to me. did you ever know how fucking attractive that is to a man? seeing the love of his life kneel to suck his cock? you women didnt know how much that can please a man. a man that loved you would know. fuck!

your lips wrapped around my cock, sucking around me as i gripped your hair. was this too tight, no, you wanted me to grip harder, thats what you told me with a mouthful of dick. shit, keep going. fuck, keep stroking me just like that, baby.

my balls are so fucking tight. you can probably feel them, the way you fumble with them in your hand. you will never know how good this shit feels. fuck, i wish i could repay you. fuck, thank you for this shit. keep going justlikefuckinthat, yes, oh god— shit yes!.

did i taste salty or bitter to you, my beautiful woman? i hope i didnt. i probably did, since i never did eat much. plus, i did just come back from fighting an apostle. what—

no way in hell you just swallowed my seed. shit.

my lips crashed onto you, my tastebuds curling up. shit, i wasnt bitter, yet i was salty. ill fix it for you, my sweet woman. our bodies, naked, feel the warmth of our own and the large body of water. i want to make you feel good yourself, without having to drop my cock into you. but god, was it hard to not do that.

[skele-bunny]

I DONT KNOW MY BRAIN IS ALIVE RN

I think Alpha would be stupid over Special, too. Sure, spent time with the guy over the road and during the eras, but it wasn't until Alpha got with Cowbell did they start spending actual time together. Thennnn it was his spiral, just like there was one with Bell.

Loved hearing his rambles about some kind of new discovery or an update in his original research, always watching him with dopey eyes and how he moves like he's practically gliding. How his overbite shows the most when he laughs and eyes squeeze shut. Always eyeing his boots and gloves, how sometimes Alpha can see some of Special's back through the wing flaps of his shirt since it's laced around. How Phil would just look at him with such a curious and soft look when he'd talk, always getting his face red.

All it took was them in Phil's office, a few teasing comments back and forth before Phil was bent over his own desk. Ended up in Alpha's room just as much, and with a bit of puppy eyes he stayed the night. Next morning going to Phil with some roses and a nervous smile. Felt just a bit more confident being quicker and direct than he did with Bell.

"Would you, uhm, you know. Like to go on a date, with me?"

"Oh, Alph... I'd love to, but I really don't want to lead you on with anything. I'm aromantic."

How Alpha thought for a second, his smile dipping a little before it fixed back up. "Then a friend date! C'mon, at least let me treat you nice?"

Their date was awkward at first but got more and more comfortable as it went on, ended up with them holding hands as they walked down a night festival in the city.

"Listen, Alpha." How they turned and faced each other. "While I'm not, you know, interested like that — I want to still have a type of relationship with you, if you'd let me? Maybe have a few more dates to see how things would go."

If he wasn't glamoured, Alpha's tail would be wagging SO fast. They had about three more before finally sitting down to talk about it after Bell was cool with it, talking about boundaries and what is/isn't okay. How they could still be partners in a way that was still comfortable to Phil and Alpha combined. What types of affection they could share, what words, what names. Their "I love you" is just "I adore you." And it works so well for them.

Anyways Alpha somehow copped both of them and I wish that was ME.

[justsomerandomfanfic]

Heyy,I was hoping for a romantic x-men matchup if that's okay🙏

I'm 18 (college applications are kicking my butt), she/they, and would *prefer* a guy but either works:)

I'm an enfp and I think it fits, I am violently extroverted, if I go to long without social interaction I will just explode. Not to say I dont like quiet, I just like having other people around.

I'm the oldest of 4 if that tells you anything lol, growing up my house was loud ALLLL the time so I'm used to louder environments like that. I'm really into music (I play guitar), I'm into a bunch of nerd junk like comics (duh), and I really like plants, flower language, growing plants, if its mildly plant related I'll probably like it.

I dont want to type too much so little speed round, I struggle to sit still, started doing embroidery, and my room is FILLED with candles.

Thanks a bunch if you do end up doing this💕💕

Hi! <3

I hope you like your matchup!

Romantic Matchup; X-Men

~~~

Romantic;

~~~

X-Men;

Charles Xavier -

You met Charles while dropping off one of your siblings at the school for gifted youngsters.

Turned out, that one of your siblings had a really cool mutation/superpower and was asked to join the school so they could learn how to harness their powers.

You were tasked to drop them off and make sure they had everything they needed.

You met Jean there, and she was asked to show your sibling - and you - around campus, in which you noticed the little garden that was in the corner of the courtyard.

It was a pull... Where one minute you were with your sibling and Jean, and the next, you were sitting down on the grass in front of the garden.

Reaching out a hand, you pressed your fingers along the dying edges of the flowers; watching as it glowed a faint white light, before fading, revealing a perfectly healthy flower.

"Fascinating," You heard a voice, and that was when you looked up and saw Charles.

You never thought that when you were tasked to drop your sibling off at their new school you would soon be joining them.

Charles actually offered to teach you how to harness your own powers personally.

You moved in the following day.

Teaching began...

Your extroverted nature made you unafraid to ask questions or challenge some of his theories, sparking a lively and engaging conversation.

Charles found your enthusiasm contagious and was secretly impressed by how you captivated the room.

And impressed by how much you knew about flower language.

He adored how you brought life to the mansion, quickly becoming someone everyone gravitated toward.

You were friends with basically everyone.

Jean was your best friend, alongside Kurt.

And you and Scott liked to study together.

You liked to try and see if you could tell Hank something he didn't know.

And Charles...

Well...

You somehow got Charles to join you in fixing up the garden, even upgrading and enlarging it.

Charles actually said that you could have the garden.

You could do anything that you wished to.

You also got Charles to help with pruning or putting new plants in the ground, he found the process meditative.

He often teased you by calling you “the mansion’s sun,” claiming you brightened even the gloomiest of days.

His nickname for you was often 'sunshine.'

He became a quiet observer of your energy, loving how you could find joy in the simplest things, like lighting a candle or talking about your latest embroidery project.

When you first moved into the mansion, you had a ball decorating your new room.

Charles said that anything you needed or desired to spruce up your room, just ask.

And sooooooo, you got a bunch of candles, and potted plants to go on the windowsill, and anything else your little heart desired.

He really started spoiling you early.

Or maybe he was just being nice?

Charles started falling for you when he realized how much effort you put into understanding and supporting everyone around you.

Your ability to see the best in people reminded him of why he started the school in the first place.

You began to notice his feelings when he started spending more time with you than necessary.

Like, more than your study sessions and lessons with him.

He would “accidentally” run into you in the library or garden and linger just a bit longer than usual.

He'd ask more about you, and sometimes when he'd "accidentally" wander over to you, he'd bring you coffee or tea; made just the way you like it.

Charles tried to suppress his feelings at first, fearing his responsibilities as a leader would make it difficult to prioritize a relationship.

But the more time he spent with you, the more impossible it became to ignore how much he cared.

You caught on when he started doing little things, like placing books about plants or comics he thought you’d like in your room. He was subtle, but the personalization of his actions gave him away.

You were kneeling in the dirt, planting a new set of flowers when you noticed Charles had stopped responding.

Looking up, you found him watching you with a rare mix of nervousness and adoration. “I never thought I’d meet someone who could make me feel so… alive. You bring a kind of light into my life that I didn’t know I was missing. And I’d very much like to spend the rest of it with you... If you would have me."

He leaned closer, brushing the dirt off your cheek with a soft laugh before nervously asking, “So, what do you say?”

You didn’t need to say anything - your beaming smile and the kiss you gave him said it all.

Charles makes you feel like you’re the most important person in the world, constantly showing you that your thoughts and ideas are valuable.

He listens intently, always making you feel heard and understood.

You bring Charles out of his head when he gets too wrapped up in work or his own thoughts.

Whether it’s dragging him to a lively social gathering or insisting on a walk through the mansion grounds, your energy is exactly what he needs.

You both spend countless hours in the garden together, planting flowers and herbs while discussing everything from philosophy to the latest issue of a comic book.

You and Charles have inside jokes with one another.

People get so confused when you just randomly burst out laughing, but then they see Charles smiling knowingly and they understand.

Comic book store runs!

Teasing, bantering, having fun!

Charles isn’t the best at loud, boisterous activities, but he’ll attend any social event you invite him to, just to watch you shine.

In return, you’ve developed a soft spot for the quiet moments you share - sitting in his study, embroidering while he reads, the silence only occasionally broken by the crackle of the fire or the sound of turning pages.

You teach Charles about the language of flowers, and he surprises you by incorporating specific blooms into small bouquets for your room. He’ll leave a note explaining the meaning behind his choices, which always leaves you blushing.

You curate playlists for him, introducing him to genres and bands he’s never heard before. His favorite is a calming 80s mix you made to help him unwind after a long day.

He can't get over the times you play the guitar for him. He's swooning.

Oh, oh, no, he's falling!

He fell...

You both create a small nook in the mansion as “your spot,” complete with plants, books, candles, and comfy chairs. It becomes your shared refuge, where you can relax, talk, or simply enjoy each other’s company.

If you - for whatever reason - are feeling overwhelmed, Charles gently guides you out of stressful situations and into calming activities, like a walk or quiet time in the garden.

He will totally let you have the job of planning the parties at the mansion; holiday parties, Halloween, Easter, birthdays, whatever!

He’ll buy you rare or unusual plants for your collection, always making sure they have a special meaning or connection to something you love.

Whenever you struggle with sitting still, Charles gently redirects your focus by suggesting a creative project or asking for your help with something around the mansion.

You’d notice when Charles is overworking himself and insist on taking care of him, whether that means bringing him tea, forcing him to take a break, or dragging him outside for fresh air.

You’d leave little notes or tokens of affection in his study - an embroidered bookmark, a candle that smells like the shampoo you use and he loves, or even a plushie that reminded you of him.

You’d always defend Charles fiercely, refusing to let anyone take advantage of his kindness or question his vision for the school.

If he is ever feeling self-conscious about, you know, not being able to walk, you are always there for him, no matter what.

Charles Xavier is someone who balances your vivacious energy with his steady presence, creating a relationship that’s as intellectually stimulating as it is deeply loving.

He adores your light and finds solace in your company, while you, in turn, cherish his wisdom and unwavering support.

Together, you’re an unstoppable duo, capable of conquering anything the world throws your way.

#Slay

[stolaz-the-artist]

Switched Career AU

I’m aware the name sounds like a sims expansion pack I’ll fix it later

AU info below!

So i got this idea when i was thinking about how younger me misunderstood Alice in the first episode.

I thought that when she said “country boy” she meant he was a cowboy. And i thought this for like a whole year.

And then i thought “What if he was a cowboy?” But thats too easy and boring + They already kinda did that in s4. Not really but close enough (i have enough memes of Cowboy Clay locked an loaded anyway so i think I’ll survive) So i continued thinking and remembered from the Knights code how Clay said a certain sword was easy enough a child could make it. And i just started assuming he must have some knowledge in weapon making. Cuz why not? and also! I didnt neglect the other knights for this project! THATS A FIRST!

I gave them minor redesigns, nothing too mayor but still something. (also all of this is pre-knights academy. So they’re like 15 or sum)

Yet again, just playing with the idea that he works as a blacksmith, providing for him an his brother.

I somehow thought out more for Aaron than Clay??? Big things are happening in Detroit ngl

I have a skit planned with Ruina involved, but more on that later

And for Merlok: guess he just never found him. Or he died. Idk I’ll figure something out later.

Oh and since Merlok couldn’t find him he just kinda grew into his powers, and so did Fletch. They dont know much tho about it and just use it as some sort of minor day to day tool. But they haven’t trained it so its just still kinda uncontrollable at times, remaining heavily linked to emotions. (All of this still in very early development dont come for me)

I have no clue what Aaron’s dad works as but i just made him a fisherman.

Aaron still craves danger, but the danger of fishing (cuz that shit can be real fucking dangerous let me tell ya that-)

He’s still too younge tho, but he can’t stop talking about it, and how much he wish he could join his dad on his boat (He has snuck on on several occasions but turns out hiding under deck during a storm isn’t a good idea. The only reason he stopped was cuz he’d miss out on the fun part regardless) Him and Clay are friends, meeting every now and again when Clay and Fletch come and buy fish from his family.

He’s been very excited about taking over the restaurant, already having a plethora of dishes he wants to make (and eat ofc).

He’s friends with Aaron, given they also buy fish from his family. He’s not very familiar with Clay tho. They’ve been at the fish market at the same time once or twice but barely talked. But they still see each other as friends, just not very close

Macy is still, Macy ig? I’m not sure what to do with her. So i just made King Halbert more chill. She takes several combat classes and planning on becoming a fighting queen if anything.

Her and her family are going on a trip through out the kingdom with the Richmonds. On her end its more of a meet and greet thing, but it’s different for Lance.

OG Lance must be quite jealous. He was sent into the acting industry at a very young age. He thrives in it, taking role after role back to back.

However this next one requieres some sort of reference with the commoners. He joins Macy’s family (Bringing his agent and Dennis with him obv.) as they travel through the country sides of the kingdom. He honestly can’t wait to go home and take a dip in the gold pool.

Idk why this thing kinda makes me sad but oh well, it’s the truth after all.

I am planning on writing this. Like fanfic wise.

But whenever that’ll be out is a mystery.

I haven’t written a fanfic since my wattpad days and AO3 still lowkey scares me.

Also other than Fletch so am i not sure what to do with Ava, Robin or Izzy. So if ya have any ideas, please share, i have no clue.

[ludinusdaleth]

re: your post about xerxes' innocence and optimism being seen as flaws or almost made into a joke. i think both the outside knowledge that asmodeus is a lying opportunist the internet's borderline hero worship of brennan also adds to this; they believe xerxes is meant to be /punished/ for being stupid and selfish enough to trust a devil.

i think you've hit the target pretty well, anon.

i do want to clarify i dont think zerxus is "innocent" in nature about the gods. he knew who asmodeus was; he read about him often, feeling kinship. but i think that speaks to how fundamentally empathetic zerxus is that he turned his anguish over being lonely, isolated from his son, his husband, even his own party, and turned that to feeling almost.... kindness. and it came pouring out, all these feelings of projection and wishing to care for someone again, onto asmodeus. i deeply sympathize on that front; he wants to believe that anyone can be saved because he doesnt know how to fix himself and the broken pieces of his life. is that arrogance, to seek some shred of kindness to prove that it exists?

what bothers me is labeling zerxus arrogant (and all the other traits people detest him for) came from asmodeus's mouth. at the time, the fanbase would not trust a word he said - not his canon past with divine family, not his anguish over losing that family, nothing that zerxus saw and empathized with - but they did all think asmodeus wasnt lying when he said zerxus was arrogant. when what is significant about asmo calling him that is hes projecting as much as zerx is. and the thing is, in canon we know zerxus's belief isn't fruitless (and i think asmodeus knows it deep down too). we know the gods struggle with emotion as much as mortals do (see literally the same scene, zerxus saying asmo hates so purely because he hates himself and asmo biting his lip in fury knowing he cant respond back without proving him right), and can even be swayed to listen (asmodeus is having to help the other gods and mortals right now). we know folk like jester who saw kindness where there genuinely wasnt and still managed to help others find it anyway. it was simply the wrong place at the wrong time. it was the age of arcanum. it was cruel. and zerxus's flaws, while fascinating and many, were not hubris or arrogance. id say his fatal move was being blinded by love that was marred by projection, and he could not see (between his low intelligence score and his desperation) how his love specifically was so important to be weaponized.

as for the brennan point, i do enjoy his dm'ing, but any time he dms for cr you can feel people act like hes here to.... punish? straighten out the kinks? especially right now. somehow fans expect a man they obsess over being a leftist to justify aeorian genocide, "fix" matt & aabria's very long standing interpretations of gods as complex individuals who canonically colonized exandria in such a way that even mortals call it out. i think a large part of that is why they interpreted zerx as "arrogant terrible man righteously suffers under his choices". but.... even brennan gave zerx a chance because he chose to unwaveringly redeem. even he said that his love & hope was not wrong. luis likes & replies kindly to posts on twitter about people who relate to zerxus for being manipulated & abused for choosing to love. matt has said asmodeus is so aware of how fundamentally good zerxus is that he wont let him leave his side. you may choose to read brennan's interpretation of the devil as a christian one punishing sinners, but cr wouldnt be cr if every story did not come down to unending hope & empathy & belief in others even if it took a thousand years for it to come to fruition. and brennan is part of the enduring of that idea.

[td-yuri-takes]

I LOVE SAMELLA...... read twinning with a twist and havent been the same since but they really do just work really well together if you think ab it. with both coming from bad family situations (only implied for ella tho i think) and needing everyone to like them all the time. sammy is really hurt that she's always painted in a bad light no matter how hard she tries to fix it, while ella doesnt realize how she comes across as annoying and that people dont really like her until sugar flat out tells her, and she starts spending so much time trying to get sugar to like her. its just interesting bc sammy feels defeated and ella is just determined to both be herself and be someone who everybody likes.(though, and this might just be pulling from twinning with a twist a lot, it does feel like she uses her princess fantasy as escapism. possibly partly bc shes Not oblivious i bet she realizes people dont like her that much, she just doesnt know what to do about it. if they dont like her when shes trying to be the perfect princess and polite and kind what is so bad about her that even if shes nice they dont want her?) sammy IS nice, and she doesnt hide it, but somehow ends up taking the fall for amy's behavior (even tho amy was outright awful to everyone?? this plot confused me so bad. but i guess scarlett and amy dont care, topher probably just doesnt care or Loves to stir the pot, max and rodney are probably too dense, and we know how jasmine reacted) and she has such a complex about it its Bad. i honestly love sammy i wish they treated her better. i think ella shouldve also had a last straw snap like sammy did, just absolutely go off on someone about why they dont like her. isnt she trying hard enough? whats wrong with her? and sammy might see that as inspiration and really admire ella for it, and spend more time together (without amy this is important.) then later maybe sammy asks ella for tips and she tells her that she seems like a really nice person !! and maybe likens sammy to a princess as well, because ella didnt have amy on her team influencing her perception of sammy. so that like shocks sammy and she realizes that if ella can do it she can, and if ella sees her as someone worthy just knowing Sammy, then maybe she is, and has worth on her own outside of amy. i love jasmine but i dont love the way she just lets it happen either. i think sammy believed jasmine when she said she was good, but couldnt help but feel like its only because she feels sorry for her, and not really based on her own merit because amy has never let sammy have anything for herself, not even her friendship with jasmine. so being on different teams from ella and still bonding could give them a chance to establish that connection without amy at all, which might make sammy feel more secure that ella truly means what shes saying. i think one of the conversations would happen after ella is voted off, and sammy would get mad, saying that ella was genuinely sweet and they couldnt see past the fact that she was also 'too weird', and then say her situation was similar in that they judge her on the surface of what amy tells them without ever trying to get to know her at all, and she tells amy shes done trying to compete with her. her worth shouldnt depend on whether amy or their mother thinks shes good. maybe this could also relate to ella's brief crush on dave, and how she feels betrayed by sky for being so excited when she was clearly upset about it when she thought they were friends, and she also realizes dave didnt fit the mold she wanted him to. i think sammy would comfort her after, and this shouldve been the start of ella accepting she cant spend her whole life in a fantasy or she wont make real connections. and later when they get together sammy might confess she worries about not being enough for ella, not being able to fit the princess life. but ella tells her that their relationship isnt a fantasy, its real. she wants to take it slow, and not put any expectations onto her. like, character growth. IDK sorry for the rant i just like them

this might just be my favorite thing

[whenwillderekhalebehappy]

fallout new vegas thoughts

- im having a lot of fun and the game good

- i wish i couldve fixed boone and mannys friendship somehow

- im glad the animal friend perk exists bc i feel really bad killing animals, especially the little baby ones

- on that note, when you shoot a gecko in the head they grab at their little head and scream and it makes me so sad :( thats just a little lizard guy i dont wanna kill him :(

- i love raul hes the best and i love his lil pencil stache and his snarky comments

- lily is also much beloved, my big ass grandma

- mean sonofabitch, the super mutant in north vegas (? west vegas, freeside?) is also great i always say hello to him

- its so cool that theres male ghoul prostitutes at gomorrah

- i like that theres always/usually a way to resolve a conflict peacefully ! on my 2nd playthrough i sided with the ncr and when colonel moore orders you to 'deal with' the great khans i was worried that genocide would really be the only option but it wasnt ! you can just convince them to leave, very nice

- its so funny that the kings are all carbon copies of elvis presley but they dont realize who elvis presley is. peak writing imo

- also i just really like the kings, i think they do good stuff in freeside

- the Legion is a really compelling antagonist because even though they are easy to hate, you do get why they're so successful and what their appeal is

- i wish you could romance benny. like he sucks so bad and i want him.

- snuffles the mole rat <3

- the rats are also really cute

- i love the minor characters like no-bark, jerry the punk, beatrice and so on. they really add a lot of color to the world.

- i always get lost in vaults bc the local map is always completely unreadable so im always running around trying to find shit

- sometimes i find it a little disappointing when you cant go inside of a certain building, like the searchlight airport and some of the buildings around new vegas, like i wanna see whats in there

- benny + all the chairmen relentlessly calling me baby <3

[borderline-culture-is]

(Long vent that may mot be ordered right or make sense bc im tired rn)

I’m so fucking done with this life tbh. Like from the bottom of my heart. I wish i can kill myself but im too scared. Thats that damn problem though, im still forcing myself to suffer because im a coward, i cant even make ip my mind to end it. I cant get therapy, or any type of medication because my parents dont care enough to notice even tho my symptoms are very bad. and even when i become an adult, id probably not be able to. I have no dreams for the future, i have no money, nothing. ill probably have to live with them for way longer. And im still not going to be able to kms ofc, im going to live very long and THATS THE PROBLEM. I cant fucking tell snyone irl about my mental issues because im too ashamed. In fact, im so fucking embarrassed that i fake a personality everyday to make myself as perfect as possible. Everyone thinks im really nice, kind, and patient. When in fact im really a fucking shitty person who just pretends to be cool and shit. All because im too fucking embarrassed to admit im mentally ill. How could anyone like me for who i actually am?? Hell, I cant even admit im autistic, even though its nothing to be ashamed of. I just know my parents will laugh at me and id rather die than hear it from them

Im at my fucking limits everyday, and im tired all the time even if notbing even happened. I have anxiety attacks weekly for no reason at all, and no one knows. I hate being this good at masking.

I cry in my room all the time, and sometimes i have to force myself to let it out because im so numb. I hate it when im breaking down and my parents are in the kitchen laughing and enjoying themsleves like its just another day.

I feel so apathetic and nihlisitic. I have felt lonely my entire life because i cant relate to anyone. I know people only like the person they see on the surface, not the person i am inside

Ive told many people online about my issues, and i dont know if its not helping much or im too numb to feel any good emotions. But either way, ive realised that it might hurt me too. Im just normalising living this way more because im able to vent to people without actually getting any professional help. And this is just one out of the billions of unhealthy coping mechanisms i have. But i have no other choice. I need to cope somehow because i cant get treatment, and if these mechanisms dont work, i need to try harder and make myself more ill. Its not like i can be fixed anymore, so oh fucking well.

yesterday, my parents confronted me abt how i always looked tired, they asked me if i was being bullied at school. That pissed me off. Why?? Have they ever took the time to realise they maybe theyre the ones causing it?? No, i am not being bullied, and the only reason for that is my good masking skills. Do i need to get bullied to be ill enough? Am i still not bad enough for you to care??

-🌟

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