#you could say they have seen me grow. i knew them BEFORE quarantine. they were with me DURING. and AFTER

[hollow-vok]

Ohh im obssesed

[guess-my-next-obsession]

Breaking Up Slowly: Chapter One

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

rating: M (breakups, angst, mentions of death/loss, love triangle sort of (tess is dead in this but still), closed off!joel)

word count: 2.8k

series masterlist

Relationships are hard.

Breakups are harder.

Especially in an apocalypse.

Especially when you’re still traveling with your ex-boyfriend and his newfound teenage ward.

You and Joel had been through hell and back together in Boston over the last five or so years, and you credited yourself for getting him out of the hunter life and into the less violent, though nowhere near wholesome, life of smuggling.

You spent five years beside him, a couple of them as a distant acquaintance, one of them as a good friend, but the last two were spent in a far more complicated relationship.

Everyone in the quarantine zone knew that you and Joel had something going on, however vaguely defined it was. He was yours and you were his, and for a while that was all that mattered. But over time, his ever-growing closeness to Tess had started to get to you. Both of them swore that nothing had gone down between them, but no one could deny their unspoken connection, including you.

Not wanting to lose him and not wanting to be betrayed by him, you offered him the freedom and space to pursue her, secretly praying that he would decline your offer and finally tell you those three words that you had practically been begging to hear from him for the last year, but to your shock and horror, he agreed to the break.

So, here you found yourself a couple months later, caught up in Joel and Tess’s mess, smuggling an allegedly immune fourteen-year old out of the city with your ex-boyfriend mourning the very recent loss of the woman he left you for.

Sound like a good time, right?

“It’s dead ‘round here. Might as well sleep here tonight,” Joel announced artlessly as the three of you entered an abandoned motel on the side of the highway.

The three of you carefully inspected the tiny motel for infected or spores, most of the rooms too destroyed to sleep soundly in, but no trace of anything dangerous.

“Alright, kid,” Joel pointed at the inside of the casino themed room he’d just cleared. “You can stay there tonight. Looks like you might even have some pillows and blankets.”

“Hell yeah.” She smiled as she ran past you and into the room, her approval loud enough to hear from outside in the parking lot where you stood kicking rocks.

“Hey.” Joel’s voice was both a balm and a dagger to your heart.

“Yeah?” You turned your head to look at him. His head was tilted, brows creased with concern, thumbs tucked into his backpack straps, looking at you as though he was disappointed. “What, Joel?”

“I just…just wanted to check on ya,” his eyes dropped to the pavement beneath his feet, a clear tell of his deceit. “Make sure you’re okay.”

“Joel,” you sighed, your entire body filled with an emotion that felt closest to hatred, though you longed for him too much to hate him. “We don’t have to be friends. It doesn’t…take away from whatever it was we used to be.” He lifted his eyes to meet yours, the crease between his brows deepening. “It’s not about us anymore, it’s about Ellie. So…let’s just do what we have to do to keep her safe and not worry about whatever—“

“You keep sayin’ that damn word. Whatever. Nothin’ you and I have been through has been whatever.” You were shocked by his outrage and your face didn’t shy away from showing it. You weren’t sure you’d ever seen him visibly emote this way before—that had also been a major point of contention on your relationship.

“Okay…I’m just saying we don’t have to try and force this—“

“Right, you wanna talk about forcin’ people into things…that’s rich.” You narrowed your eyes at his scoff, wondering what on earth he was talking about. “You’re right. I won’t force you to talk to me anymore. You do what you want.”

Leaving you stunned, Joel walked off into his own room, slamming the door behind him. You had no idea what had gotten into him to make him act this way. He’d always been so level headed in your relationship, rarely giving into the little fights you liked to pick, but here he was throwing a tantrum because you didn’t want to talk to him?

Whatever was going on with him didn’t matter to you any longer. He’d made his choice the day he agreed to end your relationship so that he could pursue one with someone else.

Walking into the only half-decent room left, you let out a chuckle at the sheer irony of landing on the motel’s honeymoon suite.

The bed was shaped into a heart, the red satin sheets now tattered and dusty but still in decent enough condition to look like a paradise compared to what you’d been sleeping on before. Setting your bag down by the door, you kept your pistol in hand as you double and then triple checked the room for any signs of spores, the room clean as far as your thorough eyes could tell. Allowing yourself a moment to catch your breath, you laid down on the dusty mattress and let out a sigh.

It had been a hasty decision, deciding to join Joel and Tess’s mission. You’d bumped into them on accident while trying to find Robert for yourself, the man having owed you a hefty amount of supplies. It was an awkward meeting, your eyes unable to meet either of theirs knowing that everything you ever wanted was right in front of you but you couldn’t have him because he wanted someone else more.

Getting roped into their business was a complete misstep by you, the allure of some of their guns and ammo in return for your help too good to pass up. It wasn’t until the three of you discovered Ellie’s secret that you really started to panic, the stakes now higher than you could’ve ever prepared yourself for. But then everything at the capitol happened, and as much as you didn’t want to stay here with the man you loved who didn’t love you back, you felt an obligation to both the little girl he was tasked with protecting and the woman that gave her life for Ellie’s cause.

“Hey,” the fourteen year old interrupted your thinking, knocking on your door. “We’re heating up some beans if you want any.”

“Yeah,” you cleared your throat, sitting up and rubbing your palms over your face in an attempt to rid yourself of the stress brought on by that beautiful man a few doors down. “I’ll be right out.”

With one last moment to sulk over the yearning in your heart mixed with the resentment you held for the choice he had made, you stood up and tucked your pistol into the back of your jeans, rolling your neck before opening your door.

Ellie was leaning up against the outside of the motel, spooning a can of warmed up pinto beans into her mouth while Joel sat on a curb, hunched over an open flame heating up another can. You swallowed your feelings and approached him, sitting down on the opposite side of the fire.

“I can make my own,” you offered, hoping that the gesture would be seen as one of kindness, but the scowl on his face as he looked at you proved otherwise.

“Don’t wanna talk, don’t want me to cook your damn food…” He mumbled to himself, your eyes rolling at the sound of his gruff tone—the same one that used to part your legs and make you drip with need.

“Joel,” you sighed, rubbing your temples. “I was just trying to be polite.”

“Polite?” He snapped, as though it was the most offensive thing in the world.

“Yes! Polite. Something you could strive to be every now and again.” You snapped back, instantly transported to your relationship, the constant bickering and back and forth. You suddenly felt dizzy, your mind and body split into two different moments in time and leaving you nauseous. Standing up, you decided you’d starve before continuing to put yourself through this sort of cruelty, his mere existence too much for your fragile heart to handle.

“Damn it, hold on now,” Joel stood up and left the fire, following you into your room before you had the chance to tell him to fuck off. “Why are you bein’ like this?”

“Why am I being like this? Are you kidding me?” You turned around and shouted, the door wide open with Ellie right outside listening in on the drama. “Joel, why do you think I’m being like this? I was in love with you and you left me for someone else!”

“You told me to leave!” He shouted back, his voice booming. “You were so goddamned convinced that I didn’t want you. You never even gave me the choice to stay, not when you were already pushin’ me away.”

“You…you didn’t love Tess?” You asked, your voice closer to a whisper. Joel rolled his eyes and sighed at your question.

“What the hell does that matter?” You scoffed, waving your hand at him. You could understand his loving two people at the same time, but his refusal to admit that Tess meant a lot to him was insulting to not only her, but you too.

Would he be so cavalier if you were to die in front of him? Would he struggle to admit that he loved you like he struggles to admit he loved her?

“Joel, it’s late. We’ve been running all fucking day. Can we please just try and get some rest?” You pled, knowing the chance of sleep coming easily to you tonight was slim but needing a bit of reprieve from his presence.

“Sure. Whatever you want. Always whatever you want.” He huffed, waving his hand at you as he turned to walk out of your room, Ellie not subtle in her eavesdropping. “Come on, Ellie. Go get some rest. The queen demands it.”

You rolled your eyes and shut the door, not that it offered an insane amount of privacy given the shattered windows, but still, you needed a fucking moment. Just one.

One moment of necessary seclusion turned into a few hours of good rest, your body and mind more exhausted than you realized.

You woke up in the middle of the heart shaped bed, the moon high in the sky, the night peaceful until a soft rustle outside forced your body into fight or flight, your heart racing as you reached for your pistol. You cocked the gun, holding it out as you pressed your back against the wall by the broken window, carefully turning your head to scan the dark scene around you.

Seeing nothing but a lit campfire and your ex sitting down in front of it, you allowed yourself to breathe out your panic, the safety of your pistol being switched back on before you tucked it into the back of your jeans. You took in a slow inhale as you debated whether or not to go back to bed or to join him, the quietness of the night promising a less hostile interaction. With a bit of necessary courage, you opened your door and watched as his head whipped over in the direction of the scraping sound, his hand gripping his shotgun instinctively until he locked his eyes on yours.

“Didn’t know you were awake,” he mumbled, his eyes returning to the burning orange of the fire. You said nothing as you approached it, sitting down beside him, giving the two of you a foot of space between your bodies.

A few minutes of silence washed over the two of you, the only sounds being the crackling of the fire and some faint cricket chirping in the distance. It almost felt peaceful, but one glance over to Joel’s profile reminded you that things couldn’t be further from.

You wanted to reach out, stroke his jaw like you used to, maybe rest your head on his shoulder and ask him to distract you with a song, but he wasn’t that man anymore—not to you, at least. This man…this body of ice and chill and anger…you didn’t know him. You had no right to act as though you did.

“You were the first person I ever let myself forget myself with,” he confessed as though he could read your mind. Your lips parted as you watched him clench his jaw, his head shaking and eyes pointed at the flames as though they were his enemy. “Let myself forget too much about this world when I was with you.”

“That was the part I liked best,” you added, voice small like a child. Joel turned his pointed glare to you, his eyes softening as he took in the way the shadows played upon your face.

“I did love Tess. Wanted to love her more than I loved you. She…didn’t want me soft. It was easier.” You felt your eyes welling with tears as he continued looking deep into them, as though he was trying to speak directly to your soul. “You needed me to be the kind of soft that gets people killed out here. And for a while, I let it happen. I guess I started pullin’ away because I knew how it would all end. I’ve seen it a thousand times over. People get comfortable and people die. But sometimes I think…if I could do it all over again…I think I woulda never left you. Woulda fought for you, woulda…woulda been soft like you needed me to be. Because losing Tess…that hurt ain’t nothin’ compared to sittin’ here havin’ you look at me like I’m a stranger.”

“I only look at you like that because I don’t recognize…the way you look at me. I don’t recognize it.” You gestured to him. “I was used to something so much…more tender, I guess.”

“I know,” he sighed and nodded his head, finally taking his eyes off you. “I don’t…don’t feel any different about you than I used to, but…it ain’t smart to do this all over again. Especially now that we got Ellie to look out for. I can’t—I won’t risk all our lives over me and you.”

“You’ve always been better at shutting off your feelings than me,” you let out a breathy chuckle, not amused in the slightest but needing to hide the fact that you actually wanted to sob until you couldn’t breathe anymore.

With a sharp inhale and a sigh, you stood up, swallowing the lump in your throat at you mumbled a “good night”. Before you could leave the warmth surrounding the fire, Joel stood up and grabbed your wrist with just enough force to stop you, your eyes locked on the contact before slowly lifting to his. You could see the need in them, the desire to fuck his feelings away, but it only made you sadder.

“Joel, I can’t…” Your strong exterior crumbled a bit under his dark, needy gaze. “You may be able to separate everything…to shut your feelings off, but I…” You choked on your emotions, your throat swelling so much that your voice grew deeper, raspier. “I love you.”

He froze for a moment, his hazel eyes studying the sincerity in yours until it became to much for him to take.

“Alright,” he pulled his hand away swiftly, his eyes dropping to the gravel beneath your feet. “I’ll, uh, see you in the mornin’.”

Your chest ached with the desire to have him fight for you, to rewire his brain into loving you the way you needed him to.

“Just…you don’t have to say it, you don’t need to become soft for me and risk your fucking survival, Joel, but just, please…I need to know that I’m not crazy. That I didn’t fucking make this all up in my head. I need to know that you loved me.” You pled in a broken whisper, tears streaming down your face regardless of how hard you tried to will them not to. Joel lifted his eyes back up to yours, taking a moment before parting his lips.

You could see the old Joel somewhere in the soft green of his irises, the affection he used to freely pour over you distant, but not absent. You allowed yourself to imagine things from his perspective, to lose so much so long ago, for survival to be the only thing he’s known, to have someone come along and threaten to disrupt that. For a split second, not even long enough to be considered a moment in time, you no longer ached. You understood him, understood why he couldn’t love you like you wanted him to—like you needed him to. You didn’t hate him anymore, you weren’t jealous or yearning, you simply understood.

“Course I loved you,” he finally confessed, almost angry with you. “I love you everyday. I love you…right now. But…love will only get us killed out here.”

Joel walked back to his fire after that, not bothering to offer something soft to help cushion the blow of his harsh truths. You bit your quivering lip and nodded, your eyes flickering up to the moon hanging up in the sky.

You almost felt embarrassed that it had to witness your rejection, but something about that white ball in the sky looking down at you offered you a comfort nothing else in this world could. You wished it a goodnight instead of Joel out of spite before retiring to your room, determined to get at least a few more hours of rest before the sun rose and you had to face reality again, this time in brutal daylight.

taglist: @uselsshuman @joelmillerscoffee @wildemaven @axshadows @sherala007 @browneyes-issac @kimm4710 @stxrrylunatic @sara-alonso @paulalikestuff @chxpsi @auberosier @mashomasho @harriedandharassed @trickstersp8 @trinkets01 @jlmaddinson @laureliciousdefinition @oh-no-a-whovian @buoyfriend @chorraich @extraneous-trip @oliviajdjarin @wumpsquill @love-affair-with-fandoms @graciexmarvel @amb11 @t0fudaddy @reigndropss @wondeerfull @multifand0m-gal0re @bfences @hypnoash @chronic-aly @wheresarizona @pedropascalsx @xocalliexo @myswficlist @untitledarea @lexloon @bbyanarchist @alwayslurkinginthebackground @rocketrhap3000 @fishingforpike (sorry if your tag isn’t working! and let me know if you’d like to be added!)

[itsdelicate]

hii so sorry this is late!! I literally just slept the whole day yesterdayyyy. but I'm more awake now sooooo

right?? I honestly can't even remember. I think like around folklore time? but I didn't really stick to it until after evermore-ish cause I was so busy and quarantine was a bad time lmao. ofc that's okay and THOSE ARE AMAZING CHOICES!!!! all masterpieces and ivy is one of my fav too omg. okay folklore it's always been really hard for me to pick my top songs from so here are just alike 3 ones I really really love but idk their place in my top aknsmsn: my tears ricochet, mad woman, hoax. and evermore: ttds, happiness, dorothea, coney Island, and ivy (sorry I just can't pick three they're all in number one for me lol)

OMG that's so cute and I love that it happened to u!! bash is so akdbsjns. yes yes he is!! and he's so funny and sweet too he could not be annoying. AKDNSJSHSSB OMG if you fell to the ground and screamed at seeing her irl I would NOT blame you. dying on seeing her is so valid

it's a classic!! and I heard ab the musical and really want to watch it!! that's a good choice tangled is amazing. is rapunzel ur fav disney princess then? mines mulan skdhj. I LOVE KINGSMAN SO MUCH!!! taron egerton is so good in it. and Colin firth in anything is an immediate yes for me. I loved her greatest showman!! yesss it's soundtrack is everything but honestly I'm so sick of this is me cause my school was like obsessed w it and that thing where u get bored w a song cause it plays over and over and over again happened lmao. rewrite the stars is still and always will be a bop tho. aww that's sweet and idk if I've watched it before so maybe I'll check it out!!

omg those are all so good. sweet nothing is such a rare top 5 but it's everything. ooh okay mine are prob: wcs, maroon, labyrinth, glitch, and bttws!!

thank u!! I did have a lot of fun asisnjs

random qotd: do u celebrate christmas? cause I actually don't so I thought why not ask

xxx ur secret santa

no omg that’s totally fine hehe i hope you got some good rest 😌 i’ve decided to answer this while getting my tat ahsjf so if there’s any typos pls ignore them 🤠

ooh that’s pretty recent!! i’ve been a swiftie since 2008! insane that it’s been that long?? over half my life ago 💀 were you into taylor at all before folklore/evermore? i know a lot of people who knew some of her more popular songs before that but became fans after! ivy is SO good i need that song imprinted on my brain permanently idc!! your choices are so valid mad woman makes me so elmofirememe.jpg and happiness makes me want to CRY (the irony lmao can never trust her istg)

literally omg and the entire cast is 😭 i have them all little letters with their gifts and kit looked at me right in the eye and was like thank you 🥺 i promise to read it so carefully when i get home WHEN I TELL U I WAS TRYING TO STAY ALIVE AND SIMONE oh my god quite literally gay panic™️ etc etc

the musical is so good! little miss woods comma elle <3 i hope u get to see it someday!! yess she is 🥰 omg mulan is such a great choice a girlboss 😌 YES omg taron is amazing in it and colin firth <333 (which reminds me i also LOVE mamma mia!) omg i totally understand ahsjf that happens with me too such a pain when you like the song as well but you get sick of hearing it over and over 😩 omg pls do if u get the time! i think it’s my fav christmas movie now :’)

omg yeah now that you say it i haven’t seen that many people rank it higher up even though everyone loves it it’s such a soft song 🥺 amazing choices glitch took some time to grow on me but i love it now but omg bttws makes me so sad but it’s such a lovely song ☹️

yay i’m glad!! and i don’t either actually hsjfk but i love the season and the Vibes around christmas time everything is so festive 🫶

answering this was such a good way to pass the time my tattoo’s almost done hehe thank you for the distraction 🥰 i hope you’re having a nice weekend!! any plans for the coming week? <3

[stylesberries]

Right Choice

Summary: Harry has a moustache now and you want to get it sticky.

Genre(s): pure smut

Word Count: 3.0k

Warning(s): swearings, sexual intercourse, sticky moustache.

A three-month quarantine resulted in a long ass list of awful consequences, starting from an economic fall to a rise in unemployment. Living this reality was depressing. It was hard to stay positive when people around were losing their jobs and being separated from their loved ones. You and Harry luckily got to quarantine together, as you were both peacefully cuddling in Los Angeles when it was announced that the borders are closing.

Being together in a closed space for so long took a toll on the relationships of many couples. Every day you heard people here and there getting divorces and breaking up because of the fact that they couldn’t stand each other for so long. Thankfully, as Harry was doing PR before the quarantine and overall gets to spend little to no time with you when he’s working, you were more than happy to be stuck together.

Your relationship had already felt like marriage before, but now you were thrown into a complete married life simulator.

You loved it.

You were waking up to your boyfriend showering you with kisses every day, and deep inside you knew that you have to make sure your skin remembers every touch and every kiss of his for the times when he’s away.

Your days were full of baking cookies, playing Scrabble, having sex in every room of the house, and, of course, trying out new things when it comes to your appearance.

You would keep debating on cutting your bangs at least six times a day, to a point where you had to change your lock screen to a picture of you with awful photoshopped bangs, just to fight off the constant desire to cut your hair.

Harry, on the other hand, left his hair alone for a while and would let you cut his hair from time to time when it would get too out of control, making it hard for him to tame it.

While you were busy watching a tutorial on how to cut hair, only half an hour into the process, Harry was staring into a mirror holding the hair you already cut off up to his upper lip.

“Baby,” Harry called.

Despite the fact that you were standing right next to his chair, all of your attention was on the tutorial, so you didn’t hear him calling out for you.

“Babeee.” He whined this time, desperately trying to get you to pay attention to him.

“Huh? What? Sorry, love, what were you saying?” You pulled yourself from the screen of your phone and looked up to Harry’s reflection in your bathroom mirror.

He was sitting in a chair, which you carried to your bathroom from the kitchen, with your raincoat wrapped around his upper body, to make sure none of the little hairs end up in his shirt, tickling him for the rest of his life. You noticed how he was holding up the short hair pieces you had just cut off up to his face.

“Whatcha think? Should I shave off the sides?”

You knew he was referring to his beard, which you grew to love. Although in the beginning you weren’t used to the feeling of prickly skin on yours when you kissed, with the time you got used to razor burns and started enjoying the feeling of his bearded chin in the crook of your neck whenever you were cuddling. However, you weren’t sure if you enjoyed that or seeing his beard wet of your juices every time he went down on you more.

Letting yourself get a bit too carries away with your fantasies, you looked back into his eyes, processing his question properly this time.

“The sides only? Into a moustache you mean?,” you questioned.

“Yeah. I was thinking that if I’ll be home for a while, why not try anything new with the facial hair, now that I can grow a bit more than a couple of hairs here and there?” Harry smiled at you, trying to analyze your facial expression to figure out what you think about his idea.

You weren’t particularly against it; you’ve just never been too into moustaches. Although you knew your English curly was right - this was just the best time to do this, if he wants to try it and see.

Your hand went to reach his and to grab a couple of hair pieces to bring them up to his upper lip. Placing the hair in a moustache shape you looked down at him, awaiting his judgement.

“Like this, baby?” you asked.

He considered the shape you suggested and let his hand rise to yours over his face. He pulled on the hairs on the two ends of the ‘moustache’ and looked back to his reflection. Harry’s gaze fell upon your face right after, asking for your opinion on his alteration.

“I think it would look cute.” Never before had you though that your boyfriend would have a moustache, as you were never really a fan of how they looked. However, you never really imagine that you would be able to call Mr. Harry Styles himself your boyfriend, and we all know that this man, sitting in front of you, can make anything look good.

“Really? Are y’sure it won’t look weird and all?” he asked feeling a bit conscious over the change.

“Honey, first of all - everything looks amazing on you, okay? And I am completely serious. Secondly, if you hate it, you can always shave it off, right?” You placed your hands on his shoulders, still talking to him while looking into his reflection’s eyes.

Harry blushed at your compliment and reclined back into the chair, pushing his head back to you and puckering his lips, awaiting your kiss. You noticed the green eyes piercing yours from below and his bright pink lips inviting yours. You bent slightly to reach his lips with yours. As you pulled away, Harry got up and covered the sides of his beard with his hands and stared intently in the mirror once again.

“I think you’ll look hot. Not that you don’t already look hot.” You pressed a kiss on his back and sneaked your hands under the raincoat and his shirt, pressing them against his bare chest.

“I’m doing it then?” He hesitated and reached for his shaving cream and razor, looking for a sign of approval from you before applying it.

“I’m all for it, so it’s up to you.” Harry nodded and started applying the shaving cream onto his cheeks.

“Just know that you have to eat me out whenever you’re done here because I’m dripping,” you casually announced, as you pulled your hands from under his shirt to walk out of the bathroom, leaving him standing with shaving cream in his beard. Walking out of the bathroom, you could see his jaw drop through your peripheral vision.

“Fuck, Y/N...” he groaned.

That’s what he gets for being so fucking hot.

Here you were standing in the kitchen, making yourself some tea to pass the time while Harry was busy shaving. You tried to distract yourself from the constant pulsating in your lower stomach by scrolling through Instagram, not really paying attention to the content of the feed.

You were so focused on the mindless scrolling that you didn’t hear the heavy footsteps coming your way from outside the kitchen.

“Y/N,” Harry breathed heavily, as he walked closer to you from the back.

You turned around, finally noticing his presence. Let’s just say - he was a sight to see. The moment you saw his beard newly shaven, except for the area above his lips, making him look like he just came from the 70s, you felt your juices starting to coat your thighs right there and then.

“Fuck,” you thought.

Harry, knowing you inside out, in every meaning of that phrase, could see the lust filling your eyes and your pupils dilating.

“Like it, huh, baby?” He walked right up to your heated self.

Even though your mind was clouded with lust, you could still see his erection, as he was making his way towards you.

“Harry fucking Styles, if you keep teasing me I will ki—.” The end of the sentence ended up in Harry’s mouth, as he pushed his lips against yours full of need.

You could feel the moustache prickle the top of your lip.

You loved every second of it.

Harry pulled himself from you and pushed you up to sit on the counter.

“I’ll be getting t’work now if you don’t mind.” He didn’t even look up at you for approval, getting down on his knees in front of the counter.

Next thing you knew - he was pulling your pants off of your legs.

“Hold onto somethin’, baby.”

You reached for the corner of the cupboard, waiting for Harry to take some action.

With one harsh pull, your pants went flying away from both of you, landing next to the kitchen table.

“Fuck, Y/N, I can smell y’from here. Who made y’so wet, baby? Was it me? Or the moustache, huh?” A loud moan left your mouth to answer his question.

“What do you want me to m’do, love? Where d’you want me?” He started dragging the tip of his nose along your legs, starting from your ankles and going up from there. The thick hairs below his nose pricked the soft skin of your inner thighs and you couldn’t keep yourself from pushing your hands through his half-cut curls and pulling him further into your thighs.

“H, fuck, it feels so good.” You closed your eyes, as you felt him move his head to the other leg, neglecting the place where you craved him the most.

“Answer m’questions.” He calmly spoke into your knee; the movement of his lips made you squirm.

“I-I want you on me.” You felt your blood rush to your cheeks, even though you weren’t at all specific.

“I am on you.” He teased you, as his lips started kissing your ankles.

“Not there...” You whined as he kept himself away from your core.

“Where then, sweetheart? Don’t think I understand.” He looked up at you with his chin pressed against your inner thigh once again, flashing you the most innocent look you’ve seen. You would’ve fallen for it if you didn’t know him so well.

Normally, you would’ve been stubborn and wouldn’t have given in to his teasing, but you were so wet that you couldn’t wait any longer.

“I want you...on my pussy.” You blushed even harder, feeling your ears getting hot.

Harry looked up from your thighs and gave you a smile.

“Anything you say, my dear. See - that wasn’t s’hard.” He smirked up at you, starting to pull on your underwear.

At this point you were long gone, finally getting what you’ve been asking for this whole time. You paid his teasings no mind, as you felt your underwear being slowly pulled down your legs, eventually joining the pants on the floor.

“Ugh, fuck. Look at m’girl. You’re glistening with cum, sweetheart.” He was ready to dive right into his favorite meal of the day, spreading your legs before him.

Unfortunately, instead of going straight to where you wanted him, he left kisses along your lower stomach.

You couldn’t hold yourself any longer and took the matter into your own hands. Quite literally.

You placed your hands back into your tease-of-a-boyfriend’s hair and pushed his head down into your pussy, feeling the tip of his nose brush against your folds.

“Fuck, that’s right, Y/N. Show me how much y’need me. Come on. Use me, honey.”

You didn’t expect him to be so turned on by your action, but the words following were the ones that left you hyperventilating.

“I’ll stay here,” He moved slightly away from your entrance. “And you,” he continued. “You will fuck m’face. Get m’face all wet with your juices.”

Your eyes rolled back as you felt his words echo in your head.

“I need you,” was all you could blurt out.

“Take me then.”

You couldn’t keep yourself from pushing your pussy against his face, nor did you want to.

As you started rapidly and desperately moving your hips against his mouth, nose, and his new moustache, you felt the pleasure you’ve never before experienced.

You could feel Harry was enjoying it as well, if not more than you did if that was possible. He shut his eyes close in pleasure and let you use his face to get off.

You could feel him press his face harder against your opening, each time your hips moved to meet him.

“God, H. You feel so good against my pussy. Fuck it feels so good.” You needed him to know how good he was making you feel, without even having to do much.

You felt him smile into your entrance, and his moustache lightly grazes your clit.

“Oh my God, Harry. Do that again, please.” You tried pushing your hips lower to experience the feeling again.

You were lucky to see Harry contribute to the teamwork without teasing you for once. He lifted his head up to let the thick hairs meet the surface of your sensitive spot.

It hurt. It was too sensitive, and you loved every second of it. You felt a familiar rush and fluttering in your lower stomach.

“Already?” You thought. You had never felt an orgasm coming this fast before.

Harry kept bowing his head onto your pussy, this time adding his tongue. Instead of playing with you a bit as he usually did in the beginning, he went straight to your vagina, pushing the tip of his tongue inside of you, which caught you by surprise. You forgot all the letters and words and couldn’t make a single sound except helpless whimpering, moaning, and calling out for your boyfriend to fuck you harder.

Harry was so focused on getting you to cum that he didn’t make a sound either, except groaning into you from now and then, not being able to hide the fact that he was having the time of his life.

“H-Harry.” You weakly whimpered.

He couldn’t hear you. The sounds of your wetness, his lips smacking as he sucked on your clit between going back and forth fucking you with his tongue and your sweet moans were ringing in his ears.

“Har,” you moaned his name louder, this time catching his attention. He kept fucking you with his tongue while rising his eyes up at you to let you know he was listening.

“I’m gonna cum, don’t stop baby, please don’t stop.” You were begging at this point, letting him know he had to take full control, as you were too out of it to control your body’s movements.

Harry picked up the pace at which his tongue was entering your pussy through your folds. You tried to find anything to hold onto, but the cupboard that you were holding onto before was too smooth, so your hand kept slipping.

You felt the fluttering intensify and your head feeling light. You were so close.

You just needed one last push to get you over the edge.

Harry knew it as well.

He pulled his mouth away from your vagina, quickly replacing it with his fingers before you could start complaining. As he started working his fingers in and out of you, curling them to make sure his finger pads press directly at your sweet spot inside, he got an idea.

Looking up at you with your eyes closed and your mouth agape, so close to your peak, he pressed his mouth a little lower from your clit. This also meant that his moustache found home directly on your clit. Harry didn’t let himself stay still for too long, turning his head from side to side to give you all of the sensations you needed.

“Fuck, Harry, I’m cumming,” was all you could get yourself to say between your screams of his name.

He fucked in and out of you even faster than before, feeling you start to tighten around him, as you did right before you came. Noticing it, he moved his head faster, giving your clit a lick from time to time.

“Harry!” You felt an orgasm hit you. Hard. You felt your body shake in convulsions, as it moved through you. Your senses became even more aware of every touch of his. You felt Harry moan against you. As your mind slowly became more aware of your surroundings, you felt Harry’s fingers slide out of you. Even though your mind was still hazy, you saw him move them up to his mouth to lick them clean.

“Har?” You softly called out for him.

“Here, my beautiful.” He cooed, getting up from his knees, helping you sit up comfortably on the counter, as you were sliding off of it.

“Are you okay, love? Came hard, didn’t you? Feeling alright?” He carefully enveloped you in a hug.

“Mhmmm,” was all you could say, as your mind was still too foggy from the orgasm.

“Oh shit.” Harry cursed under his breath, pulling one of his hands from you.

“What?” You were alert and worried if something bad happened. You followed his eyes down to his pants, confused as ever. Before you saw a wet spot in the front of his pants.

“Came in m’pants.” He blushed a little, feeling embarrassed. He didn’t even have to touch himself.

“But you didn’t even-“

“You’re just s’hot, couldn’t help it.” He explained.

Only now you noticed his moustache. It was completely covered in your juices.

“UGH HARRY COME ON!” You hungrily jumped on him.

The moustache was the right choice.

© all right belong to stylesberries. do not repost or modify.

[princessofprocrastination]

You Live In Sweatpants And Hoodies (GeorgeNotFound)

MASTERLIST

pairing : georgenotfound / george x influencer!reader. 

summary : george and your fans realize that under all the sweaters, you have a body. 

a/n : if you are wondering what dress i was talking about, search up jennie short black dress :)

before social media, you studied law and got a degree in it but ended up not using it due to your social media career sky rocketing. 

but you never thought studying was a waste, that could be your backup, after all. social media doesn’t last forever. and you were ready to accept any difficulties since you knew you had plan b. 

you, till this day, could not describe what you do on social media. it started with tiktok. everything nowadays started with tiktok. but you were one of the first people who was on it. 

and then tiktokers would make their way onto youtube to sustain their “career” and grow. so that’s what you did. you never abandoned that app, though. especially not now, everyone on that app is seriously hilarious. 

your content on youtube was all over the place. once, for a video, you talked to weird men on omegle and tinder. another time, you would try different aesthetics on yourself. 

but here’s the catch, you’ve never really worn revealing clothes. your mum had always told you to never deprive yourself from what she says “fun young girl things” which is dressing up, or down, in her say and go have fun with your friends. 

but since the pandemic hit, you have had no where to go anyways, and you never really liked to show off your body. it’s not that you felt uncomfortable doing it, it’s just that you’ve never had the reason to. 

you also didn’t grow up girly. you hated dresses, especially short and tight dresses. and you weren’t a fan of wearing shorts either. you always opted to go comfy. 

whenever you post a tiktok, you always wore your signature hoodie and sweatpants that were clearly sizes too big for you. but you liked it, it’s comfortable to sleep in. 

and whenever you had to pan down to show your outfits on youtube, you were always caught wearing jeans and a baggy shirt, just styled differently, according to the aesthetic of the video you were filming for. 

you heard your phone ring from the couch. you picked it up, knowing who it was anyways. “morning, cutie.” you stared. 

“morning b.” george greets you, hair everywhere, clearly just woken up. 

you and george met on tiktok, just like all good friends do. he had duetted a tiktok of yours and you found him hilarious. you quickly followed him on every single social media platform he was in. you even set an alarm in case he ever streams and you’re asleep. 

you two are close. some would say you two are dating, but you two haven’t figured it out yet. you two didn’t really want to disclose it anyways, you two knew your not so secret feelings for each other, anyways. 

remember when he called you ‘b’? yeah that stands for ‘bub’. he thought it would be cute for him to have a different nickname than the usual “baby” or “babe”. 

you two actually live very near each other, making it way easier as a couple, but since england was put into a quarantine order, you two didn’t meet often. 

some would probably ask why you’d have to set an alarm when he streams when you two clearly are in the same timezone? well, that boy had no sense of time and a terrible sleeping schedule. it amazed you at how early he got up today. 

that facetime call lasted about half an hour before you told him you needed to stream on twitch today, to which he responded to you that he’s watch it later. 

today, you had a surprise. for the world. you can’t believe you even thought about this but it was about time you showed off to the world what assets you’ve been blessed with. 

speaking of showing off. no, you weren’t a particularly insecure person, you were just comfortable in the clothes you’re in. but celebrating the long time you’ve been on social media, and it being your birthday, you thought it might be fitting. 

george and you agreed to not make anything special about your birthday. you hated parties and large gatherings, and since you were still in the middle of a pandemic, you used that as an excuse to not go out. 

you spent the longest time searching for a good enough outfit for this day. and you found it. you decided to pick a pretty simple dress, a black short dress that went to your mid thigh, that showed off your waist, spaghetti strapped and a little backless. 

you walked out the shower, your robe on as you walked to your bathroom counters to dry your hair. you didn’t really bother to style it, just leaving you straight long hair down. 

you put on the most basic white sneakers you could find to still make it casual, and you thought it went well together, anyways.

you finished you makeup and took a good look at yourself. you had been aware that you only wore baggy clothes, so this was a huge change. you twirled yourself, feeling confident. 

you couldn’t wait for people to have heart attacks. 

you sat on your gaming chair, getting ready to start your stream. 

before you started your stream, you made sure you left your facecam turned off first. 

you went live. chat was confused since this was the first time that you’re not on facecam. all they could see at the moment was the caption “IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!” that you typed on your notes app on your computer.

“hi, chat.” you said, to calm them down a little. 

you heard your phone go off, a text notification. which you knew was george since he had a special notification ping on your phone. 

it said “did you forget to turn on your cam?” 

you laughed at that. “no, chat, i haven’t forgotten to turn on my facecam, just wait for a sec, please.” 

you felt giddy, excited for the reactions. 

instead of wearing your cute cat headphones, you wore your airpods instead to get the whole look going. 

you let out a sigh before moving your mouse cursor to linger on the ‘start recording camera’ button. you clicked on it, before moving your chair back to fully say hi to your chat. 

you brought your hands up to wave to the camera. you tilted your head slightly. “soooo, it’s my birthday.” you said. 

chat was going crazy so you stopped reading them so you wouldn’t get a headache. the donations went crazy too, but you tried your best to read them all. 

you thanked the people who subscribed to you or gifted you subs. 

“360 of this dress? sure, i’ll give you a twirl.” you replied a dono. 

you stood up, and rolled your gaming chair away so that they can see your whole outfit. you spun around once, quickly telling them where you got the dress from. 

you tried to hold your foot on one hand, balancing yourself to show them that you could go casual in this dress too. 

what you noticed was that, your phone hadn’t stopped beeping from a text notification, which belonged to the one and only georgenotfound. 

and since maybe he noticed that you won’t check your phone, he sent a donation instead. 

“WHAT THE FUCK.” the monotoned voice read out the donation, which was from george. 

you facepalmed, knowing exactly what his reaction is like at home. 

“I’M COMING OVER.” the voice said again. you laughed at his antics. 

“see you then.” you replied, laughing, knowing he was joking around anyways. 

-

GEORGE’S POV 

she thinks i’m joking, isn’t she? 

well, she gave me her spare key for a reason, and this would be the best reason. 

i knew i wanted to come around anyways. just after her stream. i promised her no going out, but not no gifts and ordering in. 

sneaky, i know. 

i had a plan brewing in my mind. to walk in her house as quietly as possible, to surprise her. 

after seeing her in that dress, i don’t think i can stand our fans not knowing we aren’t dating. 

i know, i haven’t really asked her out, but we kinda both agreed that there was no use, knowing each other’s feeling was good enough and that we didn’t need to do anything extravagant. 

i don’t know what she’s tell her fans but i’m sure i hadn’t disclose our relationship. the fans shipped us, sure, but i don’t think i’ve ever said it out loud. 

we knew we’d have to say it someday. so i thought, why not today? as i surprised her at her own house. 

her fans watching her stream are tweeting at me like crazy. no one had seen her like that. she practically lives in sweats and hoodies, constantly. 

the most fitting thing i’ve seen her wear is skinny jeans, but she would always wear a baggy top with it. people always say she drowns in her clothes, but i never complained, she looked good either ways. 

but seeing her in that dress, damn. i needed to be there and hug her, kiss her. i couldn’t wait to see her in that dress, right in front of my eyes. 

our observant fans or close friends have asked if she dresses the same at home, and my answer always stayed the same. that she lives in baggy clothes. 

there are some creepy people out there who would ask that question in a sexual way. thinking i’ve seen her in less. but truthfully, i haven’t. we’re not pass that stage, and we prefer it this way. 

what the fans see is what i see on the daily, too. 

and no, me going to her house to see her more clearly in that dress doesn’t mean we’re doing anything. i just want to observe her beauty. see what she’s hid from me. 

-

YOUR POV

chat was going crazy over george’s donation. but you still laughed it off. it’s all a joke anyways, him coming over. 

he was coming over later, after noon, so he wouldn’t just drop everything to see you right now. 

“geez. chill out, chat, george was joking.” you told them. 

you sat on your gaming chair more comfortably as you started playing a couple rounds of among us with your fans. you told them not to cheat and watch your stream as they’re playing ad lucky you, they listened. 

for some reason, your chat still kept blowing up with george comments. maybe they were still caught up on that comment he said earlier. 

but you hadn’t thought that he’d be behind you the entire time, telling the chat to not make it obvious. 

“happy birthday, b” you heard a very familiar voice from behind you. 

you almost had a whiplash from how quick you turned your head to see who was behind you. 

you stood up to hug him, almost falling to the floor, stumbling on your own feet.

with the way you ran to him, he almost fell to the floor. “you’re here, you’re here.” you kept repeating it to him, not believing that he actually came. you knew he’d come later, but not this early. 

george moved you back gently to see your full outfit. you two were aware that the facecam is still on, and pointing to you two, seeing every move. 

“come here.” he whispered to you before grabbing your waist, to kiss you. 

you two took a little while enjoying each other’s company, still in front of everyone on twitch. 

he moved you back a little, turning you to face your gaming monitors. “MY GIRLFRIEND, EVERYBODY. isn’t she so hot, oh my god.” he said to the stream. 

you laughed at his stupid antics, covering your face with your hands as you blushed. 

your chat didn’t stop talking about the interaction, not believing that their ship was finally sailing. 

you played a couple more rounds of among us with them, george taking over sometime or making funny comments to entertain your chat while you played. 

after the stream, george and you took time to enjoy the time alone, ordering in your favourite food and opening gifts that he bought you. 

you forgot to mention that both of your twitter was blowing up too much that you had to mute it for a while. you knew that a lot had screenshot the cute moment. 

you took note to screenshot some of the photos on twitter later. 

[suchalonelysunflower]

Perks (c.h)

Pairing: Calum Hood X Fem!Reader

Requested: YES

Summary: You haven’t seen your boyfriend for five months thanks to quarentine, time to make up the lost time

Warnings: Smut. Thigh riding. Mentions of quarentine. Dirty thoughts and talk. Language and probably some mistakes (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word count: 1.7K

Author’s note: So we are all aware that this is Calum’s world and we are living in it, right? I’m not very familiar with writing smut so I hope this is okay and that you’ll like it 😊 thank you so much to the anon for requesting this! Reblogs, likes, comments and feedback are always more than welcome! Thank you so much and Happy reading 🦋💕

My materialist

“OMG! Request! Request! Request! reader finally gets to travel and see Cal for the first time since Quarantine and is Shocked by his physique. smut, where they basically ride cal's thigh, while gripping his arms. i'm a slut sorry lol. female pronouns are preferred, but use whatever you like!”

Five months.

You haven’t seen Calum in five months and it was driving you insane.

When quarantine started you never thought you’d be trapped inside the state borders of Virginia. You thought you would have enough time to go back home to your boyfriend and spend the next few weeks cuddling up by his side. But, since timing can be a bitch sometimes, your work required you to stay a little bit longer and you missed the last flight to LA. So to say that you were ecstatic to get home would be an understatement.

You haven’t told Calum that you were on your way home, wanting to surprise him when you open the door to your shared home. The smirk on your face could only be matched with the up and down movements of your leg, being almost impossible to contain your excitement.

The Uber driver finally pulled up in front of the house after nearly one hour in traffic. You smiled through your mask and thanked them several times before jumping out of the car with your bags in hands, wasting no time in opening the door and stepping inside.

The smell of home invaded your senses, as tears gathered up in your eyes. It’s been too long, too long without this feeling of content.

You dropped your bags in the entrance hallway and made your way to the kitchen, hoping to see Calum there and surprise him with a long awaited kiss. Yet, Calum wasn’t in the kitchen, in fact it appeared that he wasn’t home at all! It was quiet… too quiet.

You washed your hands and started walking around the house, trying to find at least a clue of where your disappearing boyfriend went. You searched in the music room, the laundry room and finally your bedroom but he was nowhere to be found. That was until you peaked out of your bedroom window and you had to remind yourself of how to breathe properly.

There he was, tank top soaked in sweat as he worked out in the garden. His hair has gone longer, you never could tell in your FaceTime calls because he always wore a hoodie or some kind of bucket house whenever he was on the phone with you, and now his curls were unsuccessfully tamed in a headband, preventing it from hitting and sticking to his head. You slightly bit your lip at the thought of ripping that headband off his head and pulling on his curls just like you used to do.

He’s got a lot bigger too, you could feel your cheeks getting warmer at the sight of his muscles flexing with ease every time he stretched his arms. The need for him grew stronger as you imagined how it would be like to be held down by those arms, pinning you to the mattress as he ran his hands through your body until they landed on your neck, squeezing it just right until…

“Holy shit!” A voice said, interrupting your daydream. You looked down to see Calum already staring at you, blinking a few times just to make sure his eyes were not fooling him. You smiled and waved, quickly getting away from the window as you started running downstairs to meet him.

Calum entered the house just in time to see you walk the last step of the stairs and catch you in his arms as you ran into him, wrapping your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist.

“I’m not dreaming, please tell me I’m not dreaming. I’m so gonna hate myself if this is another dream” He said, hiding his head into the crook of your neck.

You laughed as you pulled away a bit, cupping his cheeks into your hand and pressing little kisses across his face “It’s real, baby” You said through kisses and happy tears “I’m home. I’m finally home”

Calum’s smile reached his eyes as he started giggling with you, wasting no time to press his lips against yours.

The kiss quickly turned heated as you parted your lips and granted him access to deepen the kiss the way you both needed. ’It’s been too long’ you thought ‘too long without his kiss’

His hands traveled down grabbing your ass and giving it a little squeeze, making you moan into the kiss as you felt his growing erection through the thin material of the shorts he was wearing. Without skipping a beat, Calum walked backwards until the back of his calves met with the soft cushions of the couch, sitting down and pulling you on top of his lap without breaking the kiss.

You straddled his thigh and started moving slowly, creating a soft rhythm that matched with the movements of your lips “You dreamt about me?” You ask, breaking the kiss and starting to trail your lips against his jaw.

“Yes,” Calum breathed as he pulled you even closer to him, almost not believing you were actually there “All the time I imagined you were coming home, almost lost my mind for a second there”

You hummed, trailing your hands up and downs his muscular arms “I see you got yourself busy while I was away” You giggled.

Calum’s plump lips made their way to your neck, kissing and leaving marks wherever he wanted, making you moan softly when he found your sweet spot right under your ear “Thought you might like it,” he teased as his hands started to touch you under your shirt, leaving goosebumps wherever they touched “Let the hair grow as well”

“I could tell… Cal-“ You whimpered. His hands were cupping your breasts over your bra, thumbs slightly rubbing your nipples over the thin fabric, making you roll your hips with more intent as you bite your lips trying to contain the moans.

Calum groaned at the sight “Nu-uh,” He said, kissing you so you’ll stop biting your lips “I wanna hear you baby, please” He almost begged, adding more pressure to your nipples “It’s been too long without your pretty little sounds, love. Can't wait any longer, I need to hear you”

You obliged, thankful that you were not going to bust your lip open from biting it too hard. Your hands quickly found the haim of your shirt, pulling it over your head and unclasping your bra, tossing them god knows where. “Fuck.” Calum groaned at the sight of you.

“Like what you see?” You grin.

“Fucking love it” He said, replacing his hands with his lips in a matter of seconds, kissing from your nipples to your jaw and from your jaw to your nipples again, leaving no place unmarked, no place untouched.

One of his hands traveled to your hips while the other one ventured even further down over your panties. You were so thankful you decided to wear a skirt today.

He rubbed his hand over your lips, smirking when he felt just how wet you were “All of this for me?” He asked with a smug expression.

“Yes,” you breathed, quickening your pace so you were rubbing on his hand.

“Yes what, princess?”

“Ah- all for you, Calum” You whimpered in extacy. The FaceTime calls, the sexting and the naughty photos could never compare to the pleasure of the real thing, and to think that you haven’t even started.

“Wanna ride my thigh, baby girl?” He asked whispering in your ear as he bit your earlobe while removing his hand from your pussy and grabbing your ass with a strong grip that you were sure would leave marks tomorrow.

“Yes, sir” You moaned.

Calum slapped your ass and made you yelp at the sudden hit, somehow making you even more wet that before “Do it,” He commanded “Make yourself cum on my thigh, baby girl”

You started to move your hips again, kissing him as you slowly quicken the pace. Your hands flew to his hair, fingers tangling in his messy curls and tugging them with enough force to make him moan in pleasure.

A trail of moans and quick breaths came out of your lips as you felt Calum’s grip on your ass, guiding your movements and pressing you down against him, making you feel everything and more, proud of the mess you were making with every thrust.

“Babyy.. “ you whined, lips parted as you pressed your forehead with his, tugging on his hair so he could meet you halfway for a deep, sloppy kiss “Calum-“

“That’s it, baby. That’s it” He breathlessly praised, feeling over the moon hearing your moans and whimpers, knowing it’s just for him “So beautiful like this, baby girl. So fucking beautiful”

You were close, you were close and he knew that. Calum grabbed your hips and started quickening the pace even more “C’mon baby, cum. Cum all over my thigh”

Your moans grew louder as your vision started to become a little foggy. Your hands trailed down to his biceps as you dug your nails into his skin, trying so hard to hold on just a little bit longer for him.

“Cal- Calum, baby” His name became a mantra in your lips, feeling your climax even closer “I’m gonna cum, baby”

Your nails sank deeper into his arms, making Calum hiss as he was sure you would mark him but in this moment he didn’t find a single fuck to give as you were coming closer and closer with each movements “Fuck. Cum, Y/N. Cum. I got you, baby. I got you”

You closed your eyes as your orgasm ran through your entire body, making you shiver as you slowly came down your high, still feeling Calum’s big hands on your hip.

Once again, you grabbed Calum by his hair and pulled him towards you, clashing your lips together into a passionate kiss, telling everything you need to know at that moment.

“God, I fucking missed you” He said, once you broke the kiss to breathe.

You giggled, still a little breathless “Ditto” You wrapped your arms around his neck, pecking his lips one more time “This was one hell of a welcoming”

“You surely don’t think this is over just yet” He said, a small laugh leaving his lips “I’ve spend five months without you in that bed, you’re not leaving my side anytime soon”

You hummed “Wanna take me there and make up for lost time?”

In the blink of an eye Calum got to his feet and pulled you over his shoulder, making you yelp and giggle as he carried you to your shared bedroom, once hand around your waist while the other one soothed your ass.

“What the hell?” You laughed.

“Perks of working out, honey” He smiled “And we’re about to do one hell of a workout”

[starryeyedrookie]

Before It’s Too Late (Ethan x MC)

Book: Set during book 2 ch. 11.

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x MC (Evelyn Long)

Word count: 1,996

Rating: General

Category: Angst

Summary: An attack scene rewrite when Ethan spends the night with MC.

A/N: Characters and some dialogue owned by Pizelberry.

I finally decided how I was going to write this rewrite. Initially I was trying to do a full chapter rewrite but half way through, I was already at 3k+ words so it would be waaaay to long. Thankfully, I managed to summarize it but also give it a ton of angst. (This was my first time writing angst btw.) I hope you enjoy!

8:30 pm

It's been exactly five hours since the attack. Five excruciatingly long hours since Evelyn’s world was turned upside down.

Travis, Senator Ed’s assistant, had slowly been poisoning him with lead. When they went to confront him, he pulled out a can and sprayed everyone in the room with a deadly unknown substance.

The Senator managed to escape and Travis was dead. But so was Bobby, with Danny fighting for his life.

Evelyn begins to cry again as she thinks about Bobby’s wife and two kids that he left behind. They would now have to grow up without their dad. He would miss so many big milestones in their lives all because of two selfish people.

“E-Evelyn…?” a weak voice calls from across the room.

She walks over to the bed where Raf is lying down, a light sheen of sweat covering his pale face.

The team had come a little while ago with a shot that they had hoped would slow the progression of their symptoms, but Raf’s still seemed to be getting worse.

“What’s wrong?” he asks quietly, gently wiping the tears from her face.

“I was just… thinking about Bobby’s family and… everything that he… would miss. He was… just telling me… this morning that… his oldest daughter is turning sixteen this year…”

“I know… life isn’t fair. They didn’t deserve any of this.”

“You didn’t either, Raf.”

“But I saved you from having to suffer so much… and that’s what matters.”

“Raf…”

“Shh… listen, I feel… like I’m… getting worse. Will you… do me a favour?”

“Of course. Anything you need.”

“Please help me call my vovo.”

Evelyn hands Raf his phone to unlock, then scrolls through his contacts until she sees his grandmother’s name, tapping it, she places the phone to his ear.

“Olá, vovo.”

“No… I’m not well. There was an attack at the hospital today and the Senator’s assistant tried to kill him. A few people were in the room when it happened. The Senator escaped, but his assistant and one person that works here died and the other is in critical condition. Evelyn and I are in quarantine right now.”

“I just wanted to let you know… that if I… don’t make it… I love you with all my heart.”

“Alright, take care. I love you too.”

“Thank you, Evelyn.” he takes a shaky breath, his heart rate slowing and growing more shallow.

“Evelyn… I think you should… call the team… I'm sorry I couldn't save you… that this… might be the way it ends…” he murmurs, eyes meeting hers, as warm and kind as the day they met.

Taking his hand, she can barely see him through her tears.

“You'll make it through this Raf… I know you will…”

He smiles up at her before his eyes flutter closed and his hand falls away.

Moments later Ethan and June rush into the room.

“I’d hoped that the treatment would buy us more time,” Ethan says sadly.

“We don’t know that it didn’t.” Evelyn tries reassuring him.

He nods as June’s eyes fill with sympathy.

“We’ll get him to the support suite. There’s still a chance that we could fix this Evelyn.” June tells her, as she prepares Rafael for transport.

Evelyn’s almost too scared to ask, but she needs to know. “How’s Danny?”

“We… we lost him.” Ethan’s voice comes out in a whisper.

“No…”

“Before he died he… he asked to be autopsied. To help the two of you.”

As Ethan turns to help June, Evelyn reports Raf’s most recent symptom of hot cold reversal.

“Stay strong, Evelyn. We’ll know more soon.” June tells her reassuringly as she and Ethan slowly push Raf out of the room.

Now she’s all alone, curled up on her bed, the pressure in her head becoming almost too much to bear.

Her mind drifts to Danny. She remembers her first day when he was the one that told her that she had just performed a thoracotomy with Ethan Ramsey. The night of the party her roommates had when he and Sienna talked all night until they fell asleep together on the couch.

Sienna. All Evelyn wanted to do was rush to her side and hold her. She and Danny were supposed to be together. They were meant for each other. But how he was gone, and Sienna would have to live with that loss. She probably never even got to say goodbye.

Goodbye. Evelyn had to be prepared.

Picking up her phone, she sees that she has several missed calls and messages.

Calling her mom, she picks up immediately.

“Evelyn sweetie! Are you okay?! Oh my goodness, we saw what happened on the news and I thought we lost you!”

Hearing her mom’s voice, her tears start falling again.

“I’m hanging in there right now mom. It’s just me in the room now. Rafael just got taken to the support suite.”

“Oh, sweetie…”

“Mom… is everyone there?”

“Yes, honey. We’re all here.”

“Can you put me on speaker please?”

“Hey Evey.” she hears her dad’s voice say.

“Hi, Dad.”

“Hi Evelyn, do they know what it is yet?

“Hi Ben, no they don’t. We got a shot earlier that was supposed to slow the progression of the symptoms, but we don’t have a cure yet.”

“Oh.”

“Listen, guys… if I don’t make it…”

“No Evelyn! You can’t say that!” her heart breaks as she hears Ben crying through the phone.

“Wait… just listen to me. I’m preparing for the worst. I want you guys to know… that I love you all so much. And I want to thank you for everything that you’ve done to help me fulfill my dreams.”

Aside from the sound of soft cries, the line is silent.

Finally, her dad speaks up.

“We love you too sweetie. Stay strong and hang in there. You’ll be fine.”

“I’ll try… take care.”

“Bye.”

Later, her friends and the diagnostics team are gathered outside her window. Bryce looks at her with haunted eyes while a crying Sienna buries her face in Jackie’s shoulder.

“How’s Kyra? The surgery must be over by now…”

“She’s fine and resting. We haven’t told her what happened yet.”

“Good idea.”

“So, do you know what it is yet?”

Ethan explains to her that it’s a maitotoxin that he had never seen before. It was still present in Danny’s bony postmortem and on the surface of his skin.

Processing the information, the realization hits Evelyn like a ton of bricks.

“Maitotoxin… that’s derived from parasites in fish, isn’t it? But… there’s no antidote so… I’m going to die here…” her voice now barely a whisper. “I can’t believe this. Today was supposed to be happy. Kyra was supposed to have a successful surgery and everything was supposed to be fine… but now Danny’s dead, Raf is in a coma, and I’m… I’m…” Evelyn buries her face in her hands as she begins to cry.

“Now isn’t the time to give up hope Evelyn. Because of Raf’s actions, you didn’t get much in your system so your symptoms aren’t as advanced. There may not be an antidote as yet, but I promise you that we’ll be working round-the-clock to synthesize one.” Ethan tries to sound as confident as he can, his heart breaking to see Evelyn hurting.

“You won’t be alone.”

Everyone turns around to see that the statement had come from Tobias, as he, and several Mass Kenmore doctors approached them, all prepared to do whatever it takes.

As everyone heads down to the lab, Ethan lingers behind at the window.

“Are you okay, Ethan?”

“No, Evelyn, I’m not okay. But you don’t need to hear about that. You should try and get some rest. Have you slept at all?”

“No. I can’t stop thinking about Rafael. How long he can last… whether… whether it’s already…”

“…Do you want me to stay for a while?”

“Yes, please. If this is my last night alive, I want to spend it with you.”

“If I was in your position, I’d feel the same way about you.”

“Really?”

“Really, Evelyn.”

Suiting up and entering the room, he gently guides her to the bed.

“Now lie down. I know it sounds impossible, but I need you to relax and try to think about something happy.”

As she lies down, Ethan gently pulls up the covers around her.

“Something happy like what it would be like if we went on a date?”

“If that’s what makes you happy then sure.”

Her happiness leaves as quickly as it came.

“What’s wrong?”

“I just feel like there are so many things that I should have done.”

“Like what?”

“I should have loved more.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve spent the last decade focusing on college, med school, work, always guarding my heart because I might be in another city the next year. It makes me wonder… what could have been,” she confesses sadly.

Ethan is quiet for a long moment.

“Since we’re sharing regrets, do you mind if I share one of mine?”

“Go ahead.”

Reaching across, Ethan’s gloved hand finds hers.

“I wish I hadn’t asked you to stay away.”

“You do?” she asks surprised.

“We’ve wasted so much time. I’ve wasted so much time. I should have held you in my arms every day and told you how much I… how much I love you.”

“Ethan?”

“Shh… I just needed you to know… that no matter what happens… I love and care about you more than I can ever tell you.”

“I love you too, Ethan.”

“You do?”

“Of course! I thought you knew that already.”

“I did. It’s just so wonderful to hear you say it.”

“I wish I could kiss you.”

“Soon. You will soon.”

Joining her on the bed, he wraps his bulky arms around her as eyes begin to flutter closed.

“Evelyn? Can you please look at me?”

“Hmm?”

Forcing her eyes open, she looks at him through his helmet.

“Promise me that you’ll keep fighting. That you won’t give up. Oh, Evelyn… our story’s only just begun and it can’t end here. Please… please promise me.”

“…I… promise,” she whispers before falling asleep.

The next morning she wakes up to excruciating pain in her stomach. Doubling over, Ethan reaches across from the chair for her.

“It’s okay Evelyn, you’ll be alright!”

Feeling weaker than ever, she can barely make out the blurry figures running to her window.

“Evelyn! We did it!” Aurora shouts.

“Huh?”

Baz and June enter the room with the antidote as Tobias explains how they did it.

“What about Raf? He’s much sicker than I am…”

“We administered it to him, but too far there’s been no chance. It’s possible we’re already too late.” Sienna gloomily reveals.

“But he hasn’t gotten any worse, that has to mean something!” Elijah adds.

As Ethan gently injects the serum into her vein, he whispers into her ear.

“Hang in there, Evelyn.”

Over the next several anxious hours, June comes regularly to take her blood.

Slowly, her blood pressure stabilizes and the nausea begins to fade.

As Evelyn looks around, she realizes that the room no longer looks blurry.

“Get up.”

She turns around to see a hazmat suit free Ethan stroll into the room with a big smile on his face.

“You mean…”

“It worked. There’s no trace of toxin left in your bloodstream. Even if there are still traces in the room, we know now that we can-”

“Oh!”

Evelyn flies into Ethan's arms pulling him into a tight hug.

“…What you’re saying is I’m finally free to do this?”

“Yes. This too.”

He leans down capturing her lips in a passionate kiss as tears fall down both of their faces.

“Ethan, aren’t you worried that someone will see?”

“No. After almost losing you, I’ve decided that there are more important things to worry about than what people will think. I love you with all my heart, Evelyn Long.”

Through her tears, she smiles up at him.

“I love you too, Ethan.”

{Two Weeks Later}

Taglist: @mercury84choices @a-crepusculo @emmasumbrella @quixoticdreamer16 @headoverheelsforramsey @mm2305 @adiehardfan @schnitzelbutterfingers

@choicesficwriterscreations @choicesbookclub

Please let me know if you’d like to be added or removed❤️

[sunflowerstache]

Did You Order a Pizza?

Halloween 2020 is filled with lots of surprises for the Styles family

A/N: Hi lovelies! I hope you had. great Halloween and you're feeling alright these days! This is a one shot following the family from my pic Another World, which you can find here! I hope you enjoy it and I cannot wait to hear all your thoughts!! I love y'all!

Word Count: 7.6k

~~~

“And you’re sure he’s back?”

“You heard him on the phone. He’ll be waiting for Jeff so you’ve got plenty of time while he waits for the man to not show up.” Glenne smiled at you from her spot in the driver’s seat. “Although, I think he’ll like who does show up instead.”

Harry had left for Los Angeles so that he could begin filming a new Olivia Wilde film, leaving you and Bella in London. And as much as you’d have loved to join him on such a monumental step in his career from the start, you were unable to travel with him. Not only were you unable because your daughter was still in school at the time, but because of the pandemic that was still going on throughout the world. It prevented for most of the year’s plans to take place, which absolutely crushed Harry. He was looking forward to Love on Tour and showing his fans how much fun this new era was for him, more than you’d seen from him in a long time, but he would always put the safety of his fans before entertainment, so it was an easy choice to postpone. However, no tour meant that he could gladly accept a leading role in a film alongside some of the most well known actors in the industry.

But it only took you a few days after his departure to find out you couldn’t be so far from him. As fate would have it, Bella’s class was turning into online learning once the half term break ended, which meant one of the most important reasons you were still in London had vanished. So, after spending two weeks quarantining and making sure you took all the necessary precautions, both you and Bella got tested and flew to the states with your negative results. From the start, you had told Jeff of your plan and he and Glenne gladly welcomed you into their home once you arrived, wanting to spend time with Bella for a few days after going so long not seeing the toddler. And finally, once you got the negative results of yet another test, you and your daughter were off to stay with Harry.

Jeff had spoken with your boyfriend over FaceTime earlier that morning, feeding Harry some story about needing to solidify some merch designs, and making sure that Harry would be patiently waiting for his manager after he finished filming for the day. But the plan was to have Glenn drive Jeff’s car so he suspected nothing seeing it pull up, and surprise him when it was you and Bella getting out the car instead of the oldest Azoff son.

“I can’t wait.” you groaned out through the grin taking over your face. You bounced in your seat slightly, pressing both hands to your cheeks just thinking about seeing his shocked face when he opened the door expecting Jeff, but seeing you and Bella instead.

“What?” The question was brought up after a soft chuckle was heard from Glenne’s side of the car as soon as you were halted at a stoplight.

“Nothing. It’s just cute how excited you are to see him after being apart for what, a month?”

“27 days.” you whispered, urging yourself to force down a smile. “But who’s counting?”

“You guys have been together nearly a decade, and you still get all flustered when you talk about him.”

The way you and Harry acted around one another was something that was always commented on by people in your inner circle, for that exact reason. Without a doubt, your relationship had gone through some of the toughest times, but that was bound to happen when you’ve been with someone since you were sixteen… and even more likely when every moment of your life was documented to the public. But those tough times never seemed to last, because at the end of the day, Harry was everything you ever wanted and vise versa. He was what you daydreamed about in a partner while growing up. And being with him was like being with the sun. He made you feel loved and cared for, you had more fun with him than anyone else on the planet, and every single day with him felt like a new adventure. As a kid, you’d thought the way people described the love of their life was corny, nothing but a thing of fairy tales, yet that feeling that bloomed inside your chest and tummy every time you thought about Harry told you that it was very real.

“Dunno.” you shrugged, “He’s my person. Even seven and half years later, he still makes me feel like he did on our first date.”

“That what’s got you looking extra glowy or is that just another secret to staying in the honeymoon phase forever?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” you replied quickly, finding it hard to keep the giddy feeling that was now bubbling in your lower stomach under control when you turned your head to meet her gaze. She was squinting at you with suspicious eyes, her lips pursed as she bit the inside of her cheek, which forced a laugh to fall from you. “What? I don’t! Just miss him, that’s all. Isn’t that right baby? We just missed daddy loads, huh?” making sure to quickly take the attention away from yourself, you turned as much as you could in your seat to look at Bella in the back.

“Yes! I miss daddy so much!” her little legs kicked against the carseat and her arms lifted high above her head, a huge smile plastered on her face. “I have so many drawings and stickers to show him and Mr. Jeff got new socks!”

“I know, we got them all tucked away nice and safe so you can show him. Do you remember what the plan is when we get there?” you asked her, your breath getting caught in your throat for a moment when the sun shined just right through the rear window. It was a perfect day in LA, sunny and warm and just as the car pulled onto the street you knew was where Harry was staying, the sunlight danced across Bella’s perfect complexion. She was a spitting image of her father, down to the freckles dotting her face, the deep set dimples that never seemed to disappear, and the curls constantly falling in front of her face no matter how hard you tried to keep them tamed. Every now and again you caught a glimpse, sometimes through the kitchen window while she was playing in the backyard and other times while her eyelashes fluttered against her cheeks as she slept on your chest, of just how breathtaking Bella is. What angelic beauty the love between you and Harry had managed to create.

“Yeah mumma!” she smiled, giving you two thumbs up, very clearly excited about getting to see her dad again. “You ‘member my costume, right mumma?”

“Of course I did. Put it in the bag right next to mine.”

“Good. ‘Cause ‘m really ‘cited about it.”

“I know baby. It’s a good one, isn’t it?” you knew Harry would get a kick out of what Bella decided to be for Halloween. She had come to you months ago, actually sat you down in the kitchen and explained what she wanted to do like she was in a little business meeting. And of course as soon as she told you, you had to laugh because it was perfect.

“Yeah.”

Her whisper was the last thing said within the confines of the car before the three of you pulled up in front of a beautiful white house nestled deep in the Hollywood Hills. It was much smaller than the house the pair of you had just sold just blocks away, but everything about it was so much homier. A brick walkway sandwiched between a line of shrubbery and a white stone wall led up to the house, which itself was an odd shape. The very front of the house came up to an asymmetrical point instead of a typical flat roof, and the rest of the house was pushed back slightly, so that none of the face was level, and the house almost seemed cut in half horizontally from the distinct line between white stone bottom and black paneling on the upper level of the home. Finally, a brick downhill driveway, made of the same brick as the walkway, led to an all black garage that sat just below the rest of the home. The small details is what made the building give off such a cozy vibe; a vibrant green front door, plant boxes hanging off a few of the upper windows, a black wooden archway and lanterns surrounding the front door, a few potted plants on the side of the walkway, and the faint golden hues peaking through the closed blinds.

“Cute, huh?” Glenne laughed, putting the car in park and turning fully in her seat to look at you.

“Yeah, it actually really is. Reminds me a bit of our old place.”

“Place in London, right? That’s what I told Jeff.” she said at the same time, looking behind her at Bella while you got out of the car. “You ready to go, tulip?”

“Yes please!”

Her hands were already fumbling with the seat belt by the time you opened her door, the excitement itching at her in preparation for what was to come, but she graciously waited for you to sort her out.

“Thank you mumma.” she muttered casually once you had her unbuckled and lifted into your arms.

“You’re welcome, baby.” the way Bella was the most polite little girl you had ever known never failed to make your heart soar. You and Harry were so proud of the person she was becoming, whether she was that way because she saw how everyone in her life acted or because she was born with the kindest little soul, it didn’t matter. She always made sure the people around her were happy and having fun, constantly reminding people how much she loves them, and trying her hardest to make everyone laugh. It was yet another way she reminded you of Harry; they both could instantly light up a room without even trying. “Just gotta ring the bell, right? Say your line?”

“You got it, mumma!” she smiled brightly, leaning in to give you a quick kiss.

Nearly the instant you put her down, she darted up the brick steps, taking a full pause at each step to be her funny self and jump, with both feet together, up to the next one. As she made her way towards the front door, you took your place leaning against the passenger door of Glenne’s car, nearly doubling over in laughter watching Bella look hysterical lifting up on her very tiptoes in order to reach the unusually high doorbell.

Your breath caught in your throat as you waited for Harry to open the front door. For a minute, you were sure that he had ignored Jeff’s instructions to stay home, but to your relief, the green door finally opened, revealing a very comfortable looking Harry. He was very obviously post shower, his hair visibly wet and sparkling when the porch lights lit up his form, clad in a pair of black basketball shorts and one of his grey Treat People With Kindness hoodies, and nothing else but a tall pair of Nike socks. It was like a scene from a movie, because when he didn’t immediately see Jeff in front of him, Harry looked over towards the driveway quickly like he was being pranked. But within a second, his attention was brought down to Bella, who tugged on the hem of his shorts, her sweet voice barely audible from the distance.

“Did you get a pizza?”

It was comical to watch him just stare at her like she had three heads. You couldn’t blame him, last he knew, both you and Bella were five thousand miles away, so it made sense that his brain was not comprehending the scene in front of him.

“He’s so confused.” Glenne giggled behind you, but her voice seemed like it was muted with how fully your focus was on your boyfriend.

“Hmm.”

Not even a second after your hum of agreement, and as if it was in slow motion, you watched as realization glossed over his features, his green eyes widening and mouth hanging open, and he sank to his knees. It didn’t take him even a second to pull Bella into his chest, winding his arms completely around her tiny frame and cradling her head in his surprisingly ring free hands.

Seeing the two of them together was like looking at two halves of the same soul reconnect. The moment they were in one another’s arms, it was like everything got brighter. Their smiles widened, chuckles more audible - even from such a far distance, and the warmth that typically lived in your chest recently, burned even warmer. You always knew Harry was meant to be a dad, just from how much he talked about it. You knew that he would do his very best to go above and beyond for his child, to make sure they felt loved and secure and treasured. But hearing about it and seeing it are completely different. Seeing nothing but total adoration on his face whenever he looked at your daughter made you fall in love with him all over again.

“Mumma!” Bella’s shouted, snapping you out of the daze you had slipped into while watching the moment before you. Both Harry and Bella were now looking at you from the doorway, her head resting on her father’s shoulder as he held her in one arm, their faces totally engulfed with smiles. “C’mere Mumma!”

“Yeah mumma.” Harry finally spoke up, his voice carrying down the pathway right to where you were standing.”C’mere.” Just seeing him standing there, smiling so brightly and holding his free arm out telling you he was waiting for a hug, was enough to make you break out in a smile and push off the car, dashing up the steps.

His chest was firm when you crashed into it, much firmer than when you hugged him goodbye in the airport a few weeks ago, and you felt as if you head placement on his chest was different - like he’d grown since you last saw him. Or maybe he hadn’t changed at all but your mind was finally coming out of a month long fog that it slipped in without him, getting readjusted to being in his arms.

“Hi sweetheart.” he whispered in your ear, peppering kisses all along your hairline and temple like he physically couldn’t leave an inch of the side of your face untouched.  

“Hi baby.”

“What’re you doing here?” he asked, pure wonder in his tone as he nudged the side of your face with his chin, making you lift your head from his chest and look at him. “I just talked to you this morning, said you were going to see your parents before everything got locked down again.”

“Yeah, well. I lied.” you smiled, leaning in to press kiss after kiss to his lips, trying your best to control the insane happiness rushing through your veins. Your response seemed to be enough for him, because he didn’t ask another question wondering why you were in LA. Which was good for you because your plan wasn’t to explain everything on the front porch.

The three of you stayed frozen in that same position, Harry’s arm so tight around you that your face was completely buried in his hoodie, and the other arm holding Bella, forming a makeshift group hug, not bothering to worry about anyone seeing you or anything going on past the wooden archway. Because nothing else mattered. Not when you were with the two people who made your world spin.

“Daddy.” Bella’s timid voice finally broke you apart, both you and Harry leaning back a bit so that you could put your full attention on the little girl in his arms.

“Yes lovie?”

“I lied too.”

“What did you lie about?”

She lifted her head from his shoulder in order to look at him with a very concerned expression, like she felt deeply sorry for whatever she was about to say to him. “I don’t have a pizza. ‘M sorry. Mumma told me it was funny.”

“Oh did she now?” Harry mocked in offence, looking back at you and raising his eyebrows.

“Mhm. But it wasn’t, ‘cause we don’t have any.”

“That’s right. But sometimes it’s okay to say something silly like that and not feel bad as long as it’s not something to hurt anyone, right? And daddy isn’t mad. How about you mumma?” Harry looked to you, trying not to smile at how adorable Bella was about the little fib. You shook your head.

“Not at all.”

“And what about you, B.B? Are you sad you told daddy there was pizza?”

She contemplated it for a bit, scrunching her nose up - again, just like her father - and looking around like the answer would be hanging in the air somewhere. “Yeah.” she said matter of factly. “But ‘cause I want pizza. And we don’t have any.”

Both you and Harry couldn’t help the laughs that fell from your lips, wasting no time before leaning forward to press a kiss to Bella’s forehead. “How about we get some then?” he asked against her skin, glancing at you when saying his next bit. “We’ll get your bags from the car and order one?”

“Oh god!” you yelled, turning around to face the car from which you’d just ran from. “Completely forgot Glenne was sitting in there! She’s probably been texting Jeff about how annoying we are.”

“Annoyingly adorable, yeah.”

“Think she’d fight you on that one. Nearly made her sick on the drive here with how excited I was to see you.” your laugh was muffled as Harry wrapped his arm back around your neck, dragging you in a headlock down the first step towards the car. Bella, knowing that it was time to bring in the bags, wiggled out of Harry’s grasp and sprinted down the steps ahead of you, right into the arms of a now out and about Glenne.

“Everything’s alright?” Harry’s voice was laced with concern now that your little one was out of ear shot. You both tried your hardest to never have any sort of talk about negative things around her, whether that be an argument or things going on in life, because she should never have to be put through the stress of that. Most of the time you just waited until she was asleep to talk about those things, but sometimes it meant going into different rooms and closing the doors.

“Hmm?”

“Everything’s alright, right? You didn’t come all the way out here because something’s wrong, did you?” quickly forgotten was your position in a headlock, and instead, Harry kept his arm around your neck, your body fitting perfectly tucked into his side. You walked step by step to meet your friend and daughter, who already started pulling suitcases out of the boot.

You took a peek up to him, noticing he was already glancing down at you, his eyes roaming all over your face to look for any sign of distress that he may have missed when he first saw you. But you had none to offer him. “Yeah baby, everything’s okay. Just needed to be with you.”

“Swear? You’d tell me if there was something?”

“Of course I would. Always.”

“Alright, professor. But if I find out you were hiding something, I’ll have to write a diss track.”

“Oh will you now?”

“Mhm. Thems the rules.”

Glenne spent a bit of time with the three of you before heading off, telling you to enjoy your time together and even throwing in a little joke about maybe even making a new baby since she missed how little Bella used to be. The comment made your ears warm and a weird feeling flutter through your stomach, but she gave you no time to respond before she shuffled out the door.

Since arriving at Harry’s, Bella practically refused to leave his arms, wanting to be as close to him as possible until she really realized that no one was going anywhere for quite a bit. And her thoughts must have quieted enough because not even twenty minutes after Glenne walked out the front door, Bella was running through the house towards one of the extra rooms she’d be sleeping in.

“Mumma! Come help me! We gotta show daddy!” her already soft voice was even soft as she yelled from the second floor, her request forcing you to get up from the sofa.

“What are we showing me?”

“She’s really proud of her Halloween costume this year. Spent weeks planning it out, you know?”

“I know. She wouldn’t budge anytime I asked her. Very secretive that one.”

“Hmm, wonder where she gets that from?” you sang while walking up the stairs, letting out a snort when you saw him lift a middle finger to you from his position still on the sofa, not even bothering to turn around to look at you as you continued towards your daughter.

“Alright baby, I’m here! Where do you want me?” you clapped, entering Bella’s room in a way that mimicked that of Harry Lambert, something that you knew she’d recognize right away from the amount of times she’s seen her parents being helped by the stylist.

“Over here, mumma. Gotta help me button!” she had already rid herself of the clothes she’d been wearing on the drive to Harry’s, the green long sleeve shirt and jeans laid in a crumpled mess at the foot of the bed while she stood in just her knickers, searching through the small suitcase on her bed for all the pieces to her costume.

You took a seat on the floor next to where she was standing, watching her every move as she finally found everything she was looking for. Her tongue stuck out while she took the fabric between her fingers and gently held it in her hands - taking a moment to look at it in awe - before turning and holding it out to you, expectantly.

“Gotta be careful with it, mumma.”

“Oh I know. They’re really delicate, aren’t they?”

“Mhm. Reedy told me to be gentle with ‘em ‘cause they were made with extra love so they’re extra soft.”

“Oh that’s perfect! They’ll be on for quite a while so it’s good that it’s all comfortable.”

“Yep.”

You look notice of how long her hair had grown while zipping up the back of her shirt, the curls continuously falling against your fingers despite being held over her shoulder by Bella. You knew well enough even before she was born that she was going to have gorgeous hair, all it took was one look at the locks cascading from her father to tell you that, but it seemed to grow even more mesmerizing by the day. It fell loose past her shoulders every day, always managing to fall in front of her eyes while she was sprawled out on the floor playing. Even though you did enjoy how cute she looked pushing the crazy curls out of her face while her little tongue stuck out, you knew it was time for a trim soon.

“Are you wanting a haircut soon?” you asked while zipping her pants as well.

“Hmm, I don’t think so. I like it long.”

“How about we see if we can get rid of some of these dry bits at least?”

Bella thought about it for a bit, picking at her nails while mulling over the idea of going back to the salon. “Yeah, I think that’s fine.”

“Alright, we’ll see about making an appointment when we get back home. Gives you some time to think it over.”

“Okay! Y’almost done mumma? ‘M excited.” she bounced in place, trying her best not to move so that you could finish getting her ready as fast as possible.

“All set!” you checked, reaching up to grab her hair out of her grasp and let it fall down her back. “Just put the jacket on and you’re all set to show daddy.”

“He’s gonna be so happy I know it!” she squealed, carefully picking up and putting on the final part to her costume and turning to look in the floor length mirror. Bella didn’t say anything for a minute, taking the time to examine herself in the mirror. She smoothed the fabric covering her torso, lifted her feet in order to see the little pair of boots, and had one of the largest smiles you’d ever seen on her. “I look so good!”

“You do, lovie! Award winning I’d say.”

“Thank you for helping! Lets go!!” she yelled, darting towards the door and only stopping at the top of the stairs when you called for her, reminding her to be careful by the steps. The two of you quickly discussed your plan before departing ways, leaving Bella a bouncing mess just above you as you walked down to the light switch at the bottom of the steps.

Flicking all the lights off, you cleared your throat and waited for Harry, who had gotten up off the sofa upon hearing your descending footsteps and was now leaning against the back of the furniture, his bum resting just on top of the back, to give you his full attention. Although the lights were off, it was still early enough in the evening that light showed through the windows, allowing you to see his face and make sure Bella got down the stairs safely.

“You all know him as 2013’s Teen Choice Male Hottie -”

“Also 2016.” Harry cut in, trying and failing to stifle his chuckle

“Also 2016’s” you added, “and lead roles in Award Winning pictures such as This Is Us and iCarly.” at this point, it was obvious what was happening and you could tell Harry was fully on board with what was about to walk down the stairs. But he was also so excited. He no longer was leaning against the sofa, but now standing upright and his hands were pressed together in a praying position in front of his mouth. “Introducing, the incredibly talented, musically gifted, style icon of the decade, Mr. Harry Edward Styles!”

The second you saw that Bella made it safely to the ground next to you, you flicked on the dim lights that just illuminated the staircase, showering your daughter in the closest thing you could get to a spotlight. She was standing in Harry’s signature position; bent forward slightly with one hand held in a peace sign while the other dangled loosely by her side and mouth open wide. Harris Reed had taken the time to make Bella a nearly exact replica of the white and black floral suit Harry had worn to the 2015 AMA’s - the suit that really started it all when it came to Styles’ fashion. Her curls were hanging past her shoulders just like Harry’s were at the time, and for good measure, she even lifted her hand to push some out of her face exactly like he used to.

She was a spitting image of Harry. And he loved it.

“Oh my god! You’re kidding! You look fantastic! Gonna put me out of a job! I won’t even need to go on stage anymore. This is amazing!” he screeched, rushing forwards and couching down in front of his daughter. He took in every last detail of the outfit; how the under shirt had buttons but did not open from the front (something Harris thought would be easier for Bella to get in and out of), how the floral detail was exactly the same as the one he had hanging in his closet back home (Reed had asked Alessandro for the fabric), and how even the shoes were a near replica.

“Mhm. I can sing next time. I’ll go up and sing to your friends and you can sit and watch and talk to Mitchy.” she nodded, taking a step back and belting out ‘You’re so Golden!’ “See? Like that!”

Harry beamed. “Absolutely! Give me a nice break every now and again, very thoughtful. We’ll just have to change your bedtime and it’s all set!”

“You like it, daddy?” she asked, her eyes wide as she moved right in front of Harry, her hands grasping the hood of his hoodie and she looked directly into his eyes.

“I love it - and you - more than there are stars in the sky!” Harry responded without hesitation, grabbing her and lifting her into his arms, swinging Bella around quickly enough to let a few giggles. “Thank you very much, beautiful, it makes me very happy.”

“Can’t believe you wanted to be your smelly old dad.” he joked when she pushed against his chest to look at him, “See me everyday, why’d you wanna dress up like me too?

“‘Cause you dress the best, daddy!”

“Ohhhh hear that, love?” he turned to look directly at you, Bella now hiding her face in her hands in embarrassment on saying her dad dressed better than her mum. “I’m the best dressed.” Harry stuck his tongue out at you.

The reaction from Harry was everything Bella was expecting and more. So much so that she could no longer fight the exhaustion of the hectic day any longer. She barely made it five minutes in Harry’s arms before finally passing out. In the coming December, she’d be turning five and you were trying to start and wean her off of taking long naps, but after such an energetic day you welcomed the time for her to rest. She put up a fight getting out of Harry’s arms, the arm she had shoved into Harry’s hood in order to thread her fingers through the short hair at the nape of his neck, tightened each time he tried to pull her away to lay her in bed. Like even in her unconscious state she wanted to know that seeing Harry again wasn’t a figment of her imagination.

It was heavenly to be back with Harry. Even though you had only been apart for such a short amount of time, there was so much to catch up on, and you would never get tired of hearing about everything going on in his life.

“And they used this stuff called Dermacol, and I swear, she swiped over it once and the anchor was gone. Bloody insane seeing it all bare. Hasn’t been that year in years.” Harry laughed, finishing his story of how his first few days on set had gone, the two of you laying in his bed while you waited for the pizza you ordered while he put Bella down for a nap.

“Don’t wash it off tomorrow. I want to see.” you tilted your head back so that it was resting on Harry’s shoulder, in order to look at him. He was sitting behind you, his back pressed against the headboard while you were nestled between his legs, enjoying the feeling of being so close to him again. “Forget what you look like without any ink.”

“Like them though, right?”

“Of course I do. Think they’re very hot.”

He didn’t say anything for a bit, just let his fingers dance up and down your arms, clearly lost in thought. “I wish you could come to set. See everything and everyone.” he finally spoke.

“I know. I just don’t want to chance anything you know? We just traveled and I know we got tested, but I don’t want to unknowingly bring anything to anyone. Maybe soon, once we’ve been here for a bit. But for now, I’d rather just hear all your stories and FaceTime than anything happen to anyone.”

“What time is your call time tomorrow?” you added when he only hummed in response.

“6:45. Car will probably come by around 6 and I should be back near 2. Have a bit of a short day tomorrow.”

“No rush.”

“Yes rush. I wanna be with you both. Missed you loads, ya know? Only gone for a few weeks but I was going mad. Don’t think we should separate for a while.” his voice was soft as his neck strained forward in order to press loving kisses to the soft skin where your neck met your shoulder.

Since the moment you met Harry a decade ago, it was obvious he always knew what to say. He had a knack for spewing out the words you most needed to hear exactly when you needed to hear them. Whether it was comforting your stage fright, in an argument about tv or film characters, helping you pick out outfits, discussing your relationship, or talking about the future, you both seemed to be on the same wavelength. It made life with him so much easier, because you knew that he understood you. You knew that no matter what happened, he would support you and love you. And that’s all you needed.

So you decided finally, after the pit of anxiety in your stomach grew and grew all day, that it was finally time.

“Pretty good you feel that way. ‘Cause I wasn’t exactly sure how to tell you that you’re kind of stuck with me. At least for another fourteen years.”

“Hmm. Want more than that.”

Taking a deep breath, hands shaking and mind running a mile a minute, you asked; “How about another eighteen after that?”

But your nerves were all for nothing because the comment flew right over Harry’s head. Completely missed the point of why you used that specific amount of time and was more focused on giving your middle a tight squeeze - his arms moving from their place at your side to around your stomach.

“Mhm. Even longer than that.”

The words brought an image to mind, one you found yourself thinking about a lot the last couple weeks. One of you and Harry sitting in the living room in your home, talking to your grown children while your grandchildren ran around you happily, doing their best to animatedly explain ways of the world you just couldn’t comprehend. And the pure glee you felt being surrounded by such a beautiful family, one that you created with Harry. But you knew it wasn’t just some fantasy you would dream about. It was something that you would one day get to experience, and that excitement pushed you over the edge.

“You’re stuck with me forever, baby.” you hummed, sinking further into his hold. “But for five seconds, I need you to leave me so you can grab me a Tums.” the anxiety nerves reared their head yet again, knowing there was no missing the punchline this time.

Concern instantly flooded his voice, taking you by the shoulders and moving you away from his chest and to the right so he could look at your face. “Why? You feeling alright? What’s wrong?”

You couldn’t help but simple sweetly at his concern, lifting a hand to rest it on his smoothly clean shaven cheek. “Yeah. You know how I get after flying. Do you mind just grabbing the Tums from my bag?” you asked again, hoping he couldn’t hear or feel the uptick in your breathing.

“You mean one of the nine hundred bags you brought?” Harry joked but still carefully slid out from behind you in order to get whatever you needed.

“Hey, we’re gonna be here a while. I need options.” Because of Covid, the UK was heading into yet another lockdown at the start of November, lasting until the first week of December so for now, so for now, you knew you and Bella would be spending at least a month with Harry in Los Angeles.

“Can take any of my clothes.” he grinned, turning around to face the bed again and bent down to kiss the tip of your nose. “Y’know I love when you wear my clothes.”

“Oi! Say that again but let me record it! If that’s the case, I never want to hear you complain about missing clothes ever again!”

“I said I like you wearing them, not keeping them hidden away for me to find three years later.” he laughed at the memory of his favorite blue hawaiian shirt going missing after getting back from Jamaica, only for it to be found in the back of your closet when moving a few months ago. His voice got quieter the farther he walked from the bed, the confines of the walk in closet filled with his clothes muffling the words towards the end of his sentence.

“Alright, but remember how excited you were to find it after so long? Like Christmas in the summer!”

“‘S’that what’s gonna start happening? You just stealing things I haven’t looked at in years and regifting them?”

“Lord knows you don’t need any more things laying around. Probably wouldn’t even notice anything being gone.” it was true. Over the years, Harry had gathered a very large collection of… things. Everything from clothes to lockets to key cards from hotels, and being in the career he is, he can afford to have it all. But even you had to say he had more than he knew what to do with most of the time, to which he always had some sort of rebuttal for.

But this time, it never came.

This time, you were met with silence from inside the closet, and you had no control over the way your hands began shaking. There were so many different kinds of silence; one of anger, of shock, nervousness, confusion, but any of those were a rarity when it came to Harry. He was someone who always had something to say, despite the emotions running through him. Silence was never really his thing, hell he even said so in a song, so the ideas of what could be running through his head started to eat you alive.

After waiting a few minutes and still receiving no sound of life from the smaller room, you began to get worried. Obviously nothing had happened to him while you were sitting feet away, but what was happening in there? Did he have a heart attack as soon as saw what you had laid out on top of your suitcase when he was ordering food? Did he fall and hit his head? Was he trying to find a good way to break up with you? No, he wouldn’t do that, you knew he wouldn’t do that. But before you could fully get off of the bed to check on him, he slowly sauntered out of the room, staring down at the piece of black fabric gripped tightly in his hands, and you halted in your spot - sitting up right on the side of his bed with your feet dangling off the side.

“Wha - what is this?” his whisper was so unbelievably low, you were surprised you could make out any of the words.

“What do you think it is?” you replied, your voice equally as loud so not to spook him while he was in such a clear state of shock.

“I - I don’t know.”

He still had taken his eyes off of the material in his hands, looking at it like it held every secret unknown to man somewhere within its seams.

“I think you do know.”

Finally, Harry lifted his head in order to look at you. And you felt your eyes water as soon as he did. The rims of his eyes and nose were a deep red, the kind of red you get when trying desperately to hold in sobs. His eyes were a brighter shade of green as more and more tears obstructed his vision, and now that you looked at him properly, his entire body seemed to be shaking.

“If this is a joke, it’s really fucking mean.” he choked out, putting all of his effort into holding back his cries. “Please don’t joke about this.”

As hard as he was trying not to let his tears flow, you were beyond the point of no return. Your cheeks were stained with tears, old dried ones leaving tracks for the new ones to flow freely down, and the lump in your throat prevented you from speaking as loud and confidently as you would have liked.

“It’s not a joke, Harry.” you shook your head, wiping your cheeks with the backs of your hands.

“No?”

“No.”

Harry went back to not saying anything, glancing between you and the black in his hand, not knowing which held more important information. You could see the inner struggle he was having trying to comprehend what was happening, and you wanted to get up and yell it to him. But he needed to go through whatever emotions he needed to, at his own pace.

So you waited for him to do just that.

“So you - you’re pregnant?” he finally sighed, the question making the corners of his lips lift ever so slightly that you would have missed it if you weren’t watching every inch of his face like a hawk. Holding back his tears was long gone as they now flowed down his cleanly shaven cheeks.

“I’m pregnant.” you smiled, the words coming out in one whoosh of air.

So fast that you didn’t understand how he did it, the black shirt - that at first glance was a replica of the logo for the film The Godfather, but when taking a double take, could be found to read The Twinfather instead - was laying in a pile on the floor in front of the closet door and Harry was laying on top of you. Now on your back with Harry hovering above you, both of his forearms on either side of your head, you could fully see the overwhelming joy swimming in his eyes. The last time you had seen this exact look was the day Bella was born. Like within his mind, he was watching the entire world unfold with endless possibilities and unfathomable love.

Harry didn’t let you say anything before he was pressing kisses to your lips, both of your tears making the experience feel a bit slippery as they blended together on your skin. But nothing could make the moment anything less than perfect. Harry’s warmth covered you like a blanket, completely consuming you within the personal bubble that had formed around you on the bed. His lips moved against your with determination, but also care and gratitude, the vaguely strawberry flavored lip balm he was wearing smeared against your own lips, letting the memory of this moment linger for hours to come.

“You’re really pregnant?” Harry asked, his excitement taking over once he pulled back from the kiss.

“Yeah baby,’m pregnant.”

“And is it? It’s - it’s twins? Are you sure? How do you know?” although you knew he would always be there with and for you during all of this, it was reassuring to see him be so ecstatic about the new addition to your family.

“When B and I went to get our Covid tests, the lady asked me if there was a chance I could be pregnant, and - and I couldn’t give her a confident no. So I called Dr. Kelter to see if I could get an appointment before we left and she took me the same day.” your smile grew as you watched him hold on to your every word, wanting to know every single detail you had to give him.

“And she told you it was twins?”

“Yeah. Said she could see them both right away since they can see twins so early. Said ‘m about eleven weeks.” the tears returned to your eyes when you thought about being pregnant again, how much your life was going to change and the excitement that was about to be brought into your lives.

Obviously Harry was feeling the same before he let out another sob, this time his upper half falling onto your chest and burying his face in your neck, his lower body seeming to unconsciously stay away from crushing your belly.

“I love you so fucking much.” he whispered, and you could feel the ever so gentle peck of his lips against your skin. “So fucking much.”

“I love you, Harry.” you whispered back.

“Who knows?” he asked, undoubtedly thinking back to when you were pregnant with Bella and everyone in your lives seemed to know before he did. Something you regretted, but was necessary at the time.

“No one. Just you and me. Want to do everything with you this time.” not wanting to ruin the moment, but also wanting to be realistic for a moment in your clouded minds, you took a second to figure out how to say the concerns that were rushing through your mind at a mile a minute. “I know things are crazy right now and the world is scary and we’re both so busy, but we said if it happened, it happened.”

Harry was pushed up on his forearm in an instant, his other hand cupping your cheek in order to drag your attention to him. He was positively glowing. How only a second ago he was standing pale faced in the closet doorway was beyond you, because now, it was like the sun shined behind his irises.

“I have never been happier in my entire life. We’ll figure it all out together. Like we always do.”

[insufferablelust]

mgg request: snuggling on the couch and getting bored. so u start playing with fingers, and then u just decide to suck them. u feel him slowly start to grow hard, so u suck harder and grind into him. next thing u know u are straddling his thigh. he makes u get off on his thigh a few times before he will let u ride him. once u start riding him he switches the hand from ur mouth to ur clit, thinking youre done sucking his fingers. however u grab his other hand and start sucking. im a WHORE (SORRY)

what do you do when one of your fav person in the whole world send a blurb idea? you give them your all of course, seriously i went into town for this one and i hope you like it love! shsjsk as always thank you for requesting and being my fellow mgg whore! enjoy!

WARNINGS : um.. SMUT! filthy detailed smut, its literally pwp, oral fixations, daddy kink, name callings (degradation), condescension, orgasm control, over stimulation, thigh riding, Dom!Mgg x Sub!Reader, mention of wedding, slight breeding kink, mention of exhibitionism, just whole lotta filth y’all no joke, mgg got me feel some type of ways by that i mean constantly whoreknee.

MASTERLIST OF ALL MY WORK.

It was a particularly sunny day, right from the moment you woke up this morning, you could feel how terribly hot it was but you quickly diverted your thoughts as soon as your eyes landed on the sleeping figure next to you, and you instantly felt the need to grip your pillow tighter, biting your lip at the sight.

Quarantine days is both a blessing and a curse for you and Matthew, the amount of time you get to spend together pleased you both to no end, the endless talk about certain things, the late night food deliveries, cooking together, even making stuffed animals together which is one of your favorite things to do with him because you love them cuties so much. But what’s so great about quarantine is of course the sex, the endless amount of sex all over the house, You’ve done it in the shower, bedroom, kitchen counter, dining table, on your living room, even the car multiple times after grocery runs— time doesn’t really matter either, it could be at night, mornings, afternoons, even god damn 3 am. If Matthew is up for it then i’m up for it, the same goes for Matthew too, if You’re up for it then he’s there in an instant. So lets just say that you’ve been needy all the time.

There he was, laying down on our bed, with only a flimsy boxer that barely covers half of his thighs— the sweat glisten across his chest and you can see the purplish marks you’ve managed to gave them last night are still prominent, the longer you’re looking at him, the more you want to wake him up and just fuck like rabbits all day.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” Matthew chuckled as he opened his eyes to meet yours, licking his lips and press his palm on top of your cheeks . “Good morning too creepy stalker, how long have you been awake?” he said as he caressed your skin gently, you can feel his thumb pressing over your soft skin.

Before you were about to answer, your eyes catches a glimpse of his long fingers— now Y/n has always been fascinated with his fingers, there’s just something about it that gets her going, the memories of what it can do always floods her thoughts, like that one time where he fingered her in the middle of his annual family dinner, or that one time he had to make sure you were stayed quiet where he fucks you on a trailer with his cast mates all around, or the random times when he choke you, or stuff his fingers down your throat, or curled them up inside your cunt, everything about that man— your man is perfect down to the last detail.

“Someone’s thinking about something hm? care to share baby?” He keeps his thumb on the edge of your lips knowing damn well that if it inch closer upwards, you’ll surely suckle on the digits— and he won’t have that, not yet.

“definitely not thinking about you old man...” now that, that pushes his buttons like nothing else, your age gap is something very.. peculiar about you two, not far enough that its illegal but far enough for people to raise an eyebrow when they found out— not that you care about stereotypes, neither does he, you both love each other and you’re not breaking any law that’s enough. It even fuels up your relationship, makes everything much hotter, when it feels slightly wrong in the eyes of others.

“ah.. so if i push my fingers down your pretty little cunt, i won’t find you soaked through for me?” she clenched her walls around nothing at that, feeling her wetness dampening the small panties she’s wearing— god she wants him right now but its so good to push his buttons like this. So you rolled your eyes at him, sticking your tongue out before getting up and went to the shower.

You expected him to come chase you, but to your half disappointment half excitement— he went downstairs, sitting on the couch, and enjoying his morning tea. You knew what that meant, he’s mad, mad and turned on. Perfect. After you finished showering, you went downstairs to where he’s at, dressed in one of his oversize thin sheer t-shirt with no panties or bra underneath.

You instantly straddle his hips as you sat down on his lap— directly on the bulge in his boxers before you purr in Matthew’s ear “I’m sorry daddy, i didn’t mean to be such a tease, i just! want you!” you whined, tone bratty as you huff and pout your lips.

God Matthew is a patient man, but when it comes to you looking fuckable and needing to be taught a lesson like this, he has no fucking choice but to give you one.

“You knew better than to push me like that, little girl. Such a mindless baby.” he scoffed, his tone sending warmth down your cunt and you whimpered, before grabbing his wrist to press his thumb on top of your lips and suckle on it— its both calming and exhilarating.

“you and your oral fixations, what an innocent looking baby— but you’re not aren’t you? knowing full well how to get daddy going, so you came down the stairs wearing my shirt and nothing else. Act like a big girl but when i get my hands on you, you’ll just squirm and purr like a dirty little whore.” He can’t blame you- he surely can’t blame you that you begin to grind your bare cunt on his lap as you suck his thumb harder after he said those things.

He lets out a laugh as he sees how desperate you’re for him, grinding your cunt on his thigh practically riding it, as your cute little mouth almost gag on his thumb. Perfect little thing. Your eyes shot up to see his when his fingers goes up to pinch your nipples alternating between the two, pinching and tweaking it knowing how sensitive you are.

“Mmm! daddy!” You moaned through his lips, arching your back and move your hips faster, feeling him bounce his thigh couple of times just to hear you yelp. “Here’s what we’re going to do, you’re going to ride my thigh until i tell you to stop and maybe just maybe i’ll let you ride my cock, we have all day baby, this is what you’ve wanted isnt it?”

You whined out loud as your eyes brimmed with tears in clear desperation, you and Matthew have done this long enough to know that Matthew has a patience that goes on for miles. He could wait even though his cock is practically bursting, he could wait until he sees you all limp and overstimulated— and being a sensitive girl that you are, you know that you’ll be a mess once he’s done with you.

“oh and baby, you can cum whenever you want to..” He said, pressing a kiss on your forehead as he unlocked his phone and scroll down, not paying attention to where you’re literally riding his thigh and sucking on his thumb like a bitch in heat.

The dismissive attitude should offend you, but if it does anything, it riles you up even more— the way he can stay calm when you’re a mess that has come over and over again just by grinding against his thigh turns you on to no end. You continued doing as he commanded and you’ve been doing it for more than 45 minutes (you could swear its actually an hour) when he decided he’s seen enough, pulling out his thumb from your lips before using it to found your clit and give it a slap, rubbing the over sensitive button fastly. “Oh! oh Matthew! mm- ah i’m please need your cock!” Your body shake on his thighs as you let out your 5th orgasms this morning, your toes curl and your head slumped against his shoulder as he praises you “That’s it, my good girl Y/N, i love you.”

As much as you love your daddy, your Fiancé is the one who truly owns your heart and soul, so you droopily gaze your eyes at his underneath your lashes, grabbing his other hand and suckle on his other thumb earning yourself a chuckle from Gube. “Your mouth always needs something to fill it up, doesnt it kitten? greedy little thing” He shakes his head as he use his other hand to pull out his cock, you never knew that cock could be pretty until you met him, His cock always makes you want to cockwarm him all the time— the skin is veiny, its not too long but its big.. stretches you out so good that has you limping the next day, and the tip is ruddy red- pre cum spurting from the top. Fuck, you want him to pound your throat then and there.

“Shh shh, sweet girl, let me do all the work this time yeah? just suck sit pretty and suckle, be my good doll.” He whispered before pushing his cock into your warm wet tight cunt, causing you to jolt at the over sensitivity and moans out loud, “Thats it, take it little girl, being such a good girl for me.” He rasped before laying you down on the couch and pound his cock into you in a fast pace.

“You’re so tight, Y/N” at hearing that your walls clenched around him as you starting to feel the familiar tight knot on your belly, you’re so overstimulated that it doesnt take you long at all to cum all over his cock, letting out choked out whimper and sobs “That’s it, keep coming pretty girl, gonna be good and let me finish inside- fuck right?”

You nodded your head drowsily, holding onto his wrist for dear life as you get fucked with a brutal pace, his thumb falls out your mouth and you begins to whimper, “M-matthew! please”

“I know, i’m close baby, just take it a bit more yeah? cum for me one more time, Y/N c’mon” his voice is strained, signaling that he’s close. you whimpered out that “cant- cant too much!” and Matthew’s thumb instantly went to rub your clit sending you over the edge quickly. “i know you have it in you, pretty girl. come on more— fuck thats it, thats it baby good gi— Ah fuck!” You cum all over his cock, him following not long after, releasing himself inside of you, filling you up as you shake and try to catch your breath.

“I love you— so fucking much Y/N” he whispered as he begins to pull out slowly and watch the cum drip out of her cunt, making him go feral and push his cum back in. “gotta stay full okay? who knows.. maybe i can knock you up before our wedding.”

Oh.. and you thought he won’t be up for round two.

———————

Thank you for reading, please leave a like comment and reblog! Blurb request is open so send some! give me feedback or constructive criticisms by simply leave your trace on my blog. Thanks❤️

[nerdzzone]

Only For A Moment: July

Summary: A series of shorter one shots from Chris and Whitney’s life together throughout the pandemic. Some happy times, some harder times, some fluff and some things a little more sexy - they work through it all as they try to get settled in their new and blossoming relationship.

Chris Evans x OFC

Part of the Once Bitten/More Hearts series

Only For A Moment: June

-----

July 2020

Chris was stressed.

It was understandable as he'd just launched his new endeavour - A Starting Point - but it was worrying me how anxious and overwhelmed he seemed to be. The feedback so far had been good, but he was still concerned about how it was going to be received and whether or not people would actually find it useful. He had several long, full days of interviews scheduled to promote it and explain what they hoped to achieve and, after the first week, he was exhausted which made him moody and withdrawn.

It didn't help that Grayson had quickly adjusted to having our undivided attention and was growing increasingly frustrated with his dad's busy schedule. The Friday after the launch, Chris promised him that he'd be done by bedtime so he could tuck him in, but technical difficulties got in the way and he was once again stuck in front of his laptop until well into the evening.

And that was where I found him, at almost nine o'clock, when I went to see if he'd be finished anytime soon. I'd poked my head around the door and saw him sat at his desk with his head in his hands and the sight made my heart ache.  Sneaking up behind him, I wrapped my arms around his shoulders.

"Hey," I greeted him softly. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine," he assured me, but the sigh that followed told me otherwise. "Just tired. It's been a busy week."

"It has. We've missed you."

My words weren't meant to add guilt to his stress, but I realized my mistake when he winced.

"Sorry," he mumbled, placing a kiss on my arm where it rested across his chest. "I did try to finish early today - I suggested we push the last interview until tomorrow when we hit the connection issues, but they weren't having it. Was Grayson mad that I missed bedtime again?"

"Not mad," I shrugged. "Just a bit disappointed."

Chris' head fell forward and his shoulders stiffened.

"That's worse."

"No, it's not," I insisted, squeezing him tightly. "He was just a little sad, but he got over it. I promised him that you'd do something fun with him when you weren't so busy and he accepted that."

"I was actually thinking of taking him to the museum to see the dinosaur exhibit," Chris admitted. "They just reopened, but he'd have to wear a mask."

"He'd love that," I smiled, knowing how much both of them loved their father and son days. We'd made an effort to give him more one on one time, but it was limiting when we hadn't been able to leave the house much until recently. "And I think he'd be okay with a mask. We can order one and get him to wear it at home for a bit to get used to it."

"Good idea," Chris nodded. "I can do that tomorrow"

"Or I can," I suggested, kissing the side of his head. "You're busy enough at the moment. And you're stressed, I can feel the tension in your shoulders."

Chris sighed again and I felt a pang of sympathy for him.

"I know. This project just means a lot to me. I want it to do well."

"And it is," I reminded him as an idea hit me. "C'mon, I know what you need to help you relax."

"Oh, yeah?" Chris smirked and I rolled my eyes as his mind had clearly gone straight to something dirty. "What would that be?"

"Probably not whatever you're thinking of," I informed him. "But there's some pizza left in the kitchen. Go have a slice of that and then meet me in the bedroom."

"Alright, I like the sound of this."

His smirk had grown and I swatted the back of his head as I slid my arms off of his shoulders.

"Don't be such a perv!"

He laughed and stood up from his chair as I shook my head and he pulled me in for a quick kiss before we headed downstairs and went our separate ways.

-

If there was one thing I knew how to do, it was run the perfect bath for relaxation. It had been my tradition every evening after I'd dropped Gray off at Chris' house - I would pour myself a glass of wine and take a bath, enjoying the opportunity for a long soak without the risk of Grayson interrupting. The bathtub in Chris' en suite made that indulgence even better due to it's size and depth and I'd taken advantage of it several times during our stay with Chris. Which meant that I had quite the assortment of bath salts and bubble bath to create the perfect bath for Chris.

The tub had just finished filling up when he walked in and I heard him chuckle at the sight.

"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little disappointed."

"Oh, shush," I teased, turning around to face him once I'd turned off the taps. "This will be much more effective than whatever you were imagining."

Chris scoffed at that claim, a smirk firmly on his face.

"I disagree."

"I'm sure you do, but that's too bad. Now, strip."

"Ooh, I like it when you're bossy."

His comment earned another roll of my eyes as I crossed my arms and waited for him to do as I'd instructed.

As he did, I couldn't help, but stare. He seemed to be toning up even more during our quarantine and the sight of his perfectly sculpted body took my breath away every time I had the luxury of seeing it. He caught my gaze and colour flooded my cheeks as I knew that he'd seen me gawking at him, but despite the smug look on his face, he made no comment as he climbed into the tub.

Once he was settled with his head resting back on the edge of the tub, I sat down on the closed lid of the toilet and picked my phone up from where it was sitting on the counter. I unlocked the screen with the intention of replying to my mother who had messaged me while I was getting the bath ready, but a giggle slipped from my lips when I saw what was already open on my phone from earlier that day. Chris raised a questioning eyebrow and I debated whether or not to tell him about it. It had the potential to send his stress levels sky rocketing again, but if he thought I was hiding something from him, it would probably irritate him and ruin his mood anyway so I came clean.

"Hannah sent me a link to an Instagram account today that posts lots of gossip stuff," I informed him. "Most of it seems to be just random submissions, but they've been right a few times, I guess, so people seem to believe whatever they say now."

"And why did she send you a link to it?"

"Because apparently you're engaged."

I was smiling as I broke the news to him because obviously I knew it wasn't true, but Chris let out a groan of annoyance.

"Engaged to who?! To you?"

"No, to a mysterious blonde. Apparently, the person who sent in the message has a friend who spotted you picking up some takeout with this woman. Her ring was clearly on display and you were openly affectionate with her while you waited for your food."

"That's just a straight up lie," Chris huffed. "I don't know why people waste their time making this shit up and I really don't know why you bother reading it."

"It's not like I seek it out, but Hannah finds it entertaining to see what people are saying about us," I shrugged. "You have to admit that it's kinda funny. It sends everyone into such a frenzy."

Chris shot me a look.

"Funny isn't the word I'd use."

"C'mon, it's a little amusing!" I smiled, scrolling down to the comments. "Like, look, they're discussing whether or not I fit the description in case I just dyed my hair blonde. But then someone else says they saw me in L.A. two weeks ago, around the time you were with the blonde woman, so it couldn't possibly be me. They're like little detectives."

Chris rolled his eyes, but there was a reluctant smile on his face.

"Detectives aren't allowed to just make things up," he pointed out. "Unless you took a secret trip a few weeks ago that I didn't know about."

"No, I didn't," I laughed. "You have some very creative fans."

"I don't think it's my fans who write that stuff. It's probably other people trying to antagonize them."

"Well, it works like a charm. They go nuts trying to decide if it's true. I just wish they wouldn't get so mean about it sometimes," I admitted. "Like, some of them were saying how glad they were that you'd moved on from me finally because of how cruel it is that I ruined your life by trapping you with a baby."

The scowl on Chris' face instantly returned with that additional information and I scolded myself for saying it.

"I should have let Downey sue them all like he wanted to when it first leaked that you were pregnant," Chris huffed. "Then maybe by now these gossip pages would know better than to post shit about us."

"It would have just made things worse," I insisted as a smirk slid onto my face. "Besides, it doesn't really bother me. I'm the one sitting next to you while you lounge completely naked in a bubble bath while they spiral into a jealous pit of despair."

That comment earned me a laugh before he sat up a bit higher in the tub.

"Why are you sitting over there anyway?" He asked. "Get in here with me."

I smiled at his demand, but shook my head.

"This isn't supposed to be a sexy bath. You're supposed to be relaxing."

"And what better way to relax than to share a bath with the woman I love?"

A statement like that was hard to resist, especially as he grinned up at me from the tub with that amazing smile of his. I relented with surprisingly little resistance and rose from where I was sitting.

"I suppose that's fair..."

Putting my phone back on the counter, I turned so my back was to Chris. I could feel his eyes burning into me as he stared and I bit back a smirk. I quickly undid the button on the shorts I was wearing and slid them down my legs, bending at the waist as I stepped out of them. A noise of approval came from behind me as I stood up again and I shot him what I hoped was a sexy look over my shoulder before I pulled my shirt over my head. After slipping out of my bra and quickly pulling off my panties, I left them with my shorts and turned around with one hand over my chest to keep it covered until I was settled in the tub under all the bubbles.

"Wow," Chris grinned. "You're so fuckin' hot."

I giggled at his compliment, feeling a wave of self-confidence from my little strip tease.

For the past few weeks I'd been spending more time in Chris' home gym and I was feeling the positive side effects - more than just in my slowly developing muscle tone. We'd had a fight one night not long after our first pool day when I made some self-deprecating comments that rubbed Chris the wrong way. He scolded me rather harshly for always talking badly about my body and, while at first his exasperated reaction made me shut down, it eventually led to a very open conversation.

I explained that I wasn't just fishing for compliments all the time. I had some serious insecurities and - as analyzed by Hannah who was a very well trained psychologist - I tended to put myself down first before someone else could do it. I informed him that it wasn't just the body changes that come from pregnancy that bothered me, but the fact that I hadn't had much time to go to the gym since Gray was born - when he was with me, I was busy with him and when he was with Chris, I was busy with work.

He understood where I was coming from and reminded me that his home gym was available for my use any time I wanted, but insisted that I make sure I was doing it for the right reasons. He didn't want me killing myself to change how I looked when I didn't really need to, but I assured him that my motivations weren't all vanity related. Sure, I wanted to look good, but I missed feeling strong and healthy.

After our conversation, I’d started taking some time every day to get some exercise and the difference it was making to my confidence even after a few short weeks was huge. So, hearing Chris' praise now made me feel wonderful because I was actually starting to believe it.

"Thanks," I smiled in response to his compliment as I got settled in the bath tub. We were facing each other, my legs draped over his thighs so my feet were resting by his hips and my bum was between his shins. He grabbed my hand and laced our fingers together as he watched me with what could only be described as an adoring look. "It's amazing what a few weeks at the gym can do."

"Helps that you were pretty hot to start with too," he teased. "But I'm glad you're feeling more confident."

"Me too." I leaned forward to press a soft kiss on his lips. "So, are you feeling more relaxed?"

"I am," Chris nodded before letting out a sigh. "I'm sorry I've been so stressed out lately. I just want this whole thing to go well."

"And it is," I repeated my earlier assurance. "So far you've had a great reaction."

"For now," he frowned. "I just want people to actually use it and get involved."

"They will," I assured him, leaning in for another kiss. "Have I told you how proud I am of you? You're doing such a great thing, using your influence to try and make a difference. It's very inspiring."

"Well, I think you're too kind," he told me, trying to be humble despite the proud grin on his face. "Really, it's the least I can do."

"Nope, the least you could do is nothing," I pointed out. "But you're trying to help people and I'm so proud of you for that. I'm grateful that Grayson has a dad like you to look up to."

It appeared - for a brief moment - that Chris' eyes grew a little bit glassy, but he blinked a few times and they were clear once again.

"Thanks, Winnie." He paused to clear his throat. "That really means a lot and I'm sorry I've been so busy this week. I have one more podcast interview to do tomorrow morning and then I have a few days off."

"I'm glad you'll get a break, but you don't need to be sorry," I assured him. "Even though it has been kinda weird. It's crazy that a few months ago, we only ever saw each other in passing, but now I miss you when you're busy for even a few hours."

It was true. I had missed him the last few days and it did seem ridiculous when we used to go weeks without seeing each other and even then it was just briefly at a pick up or drop off. I'd been spoiled the last few months, having so much of his time. Now, seeing him every day wasn't even enough if I didn't have much of his undivided attention.

A brief flash of dread tore through me as I shared that thought with Chris because I knew this would all come to an end some day. We couldn't stay locked away in his house forever, eventually we would both have to go back to work and I knew it would make things harder. Some people found that the intense quality time was testing their relationship, but I was worried that we'd start to crumble as soon as we weren't together almost twenty-four hours a day. Once the world of Hollywood got it's claws back in Chris, I couldn't help but wonder where that would leave me.

But as always when those thoughts filled my mind, I did my best to push them away. It was likely still months before anything would change so there was no point in stressing about it now and Chris chuckled, bringing me back to the moment.

"Awe, you’ve missed me?"

His words were accompanied by a cocky smirk and I smiled despite my rolling eyes.

"Shut up."

"It's sweet. I never thought you'd be a clingy kinda girlfriend."

I wrinkled my nose in displeasure at that thought and shook my head.

"I'm not clingy!"

"Kinda sounds like you are," he pointed out. "Can't even get through a work day without pining for me."

"I wasn't pining!" I huffed, but he continued insisting that it seemed like I was. "Well, I was just about to suggest we get out of this bath, but now I think maybe you don't deserve what I was thinking of doing next."

"Get out? You just got in," Chris pointed out with a raised eyebrow. "What else have you got planned?"

Now it was my turn to smirk as I rested my hands on the side of the tub before pushing up until I was standing in front of him.

"A little extra relaxation," I told him, deliberately keeping it vague. "But I guess now, you'll never know."

I stepped out of the tub and grabbed my towel. With one last glance back at Chris who was still sitting in the bath, looking a mix of surprised and intrigued, I wrapped the towel around myself and left the bathroom - making sure to sway my hips a little more than usual on my way out.

I heard the water slosh as Chris leapt up to follow me and he appeared in the bedroom - towel around his waist and water dripping to the floor - moments later.

"Chris!" I laughed. "You're getting the floor all wet!"

"So are you," he pointed out. "But I don't care."

I hardly had time to take in his words before he strode swiftly across the room and pulled me against his chest. His hands gripped my hips so tightly that it undid my towel and he moved just briefly enough for it to fall to the floor. Once that was out of the way, he captured my lips in a kiss so fierce it made my breath catch in my chest.

I indulged for a moment, enjoying the feel of his hands roaming by body as his lips worked against mine, but then I remembered who this evening was supposed to be about. I pulled back slightly, just enough to trail my lips across his jaw and locked them onto a spot just below his ear as my hands moved to the towel around his waist. I could feel a slight bulge pressing against me - he wasn't hard yet, but it was clear that the anticipation was having an effect on him - and I untucked the towel and let it fall down with mine to give me easier access.

I heard Chris take in a shaky breath and felt him tighten his grip on me as I took him in my hand. Smiling against his skin and enjoying his little reactions, I stroked him until he was thick and full from my touch.

"Get on the bed."

Chris' tone was demanding and there was definitely a part of me that wanted to follow his instructions, but I resisted and moved my face away from where it was buried in his neck, shaking my head.

"No, this is all about you," I reminded him. "You need to relax."

He voiced a few protests as I kissed my way down his chest, but he fell silent as I dropped to my knees in front of him. His hands were clenched in fists by his side while I continued to gently stroke him, placing soft kisses on the top of his thigh, but when my kisses moved closer until my lips landed on his cock, his hands shot to grip in my hair. He wasn't forcing anything or trying to control my movements, but the sense of control that action gave him was something I knew he enjoyed and I smiled before getting down to business.

I licked him slowly from base to tip, making him shudder as I took him into my mouth. His hips twitched, pushing farther in and I did my best to accommodate him. Letting him slide slowly over my tongue, I stretched my jaw to get my mouth around his thick shaft. He always felt big - he was big - but this action made it even more apparent and I took as much of him as I could before sliding back up his cock.

Pausing for a moment to suck at the tip, I used my hand to stroke him as I lifted my eyes to look up at his face. His hand gripped my hair tighter as he threw his head back briefly, then returned his gaze to me and met my eyes. I smiled around his cock before letting my lips move farther down, taking him back in my mouth. Not feeling completely confident in my ability to deep throat someone of his size, I used my hand to cover the base and began to bob my head with renewed enthusiasm, spurred on by all the sighs and groans that were falling from his lips.

I could feel myself growing wet. His reactions, the position we were in, the slight tug of my hair - it was all overwhelming me and increasing the temptation to let him fall from my mouth, push him onto the bed and ride him until we both couldn't take it anymore, but I tried to stay focused as I worked his cock.

After a few minutes, I could tell he was getting close as his grip on my head began leading me more and more, a sign his self control was waning. That only spurred me on, but as his breathing shifted until he was practically panting and I could feel his thigh muscles tensing where my hand was resting, I heard a sound that would kill any mood.

"Mama!"

Grayson's voice floated down the stairs. It was distant and quiet, but enough to make my blood run cold as I instantly pulled my mouth off Chris.

"Fuck," Chris groaned, a pained look on his face as I shot up from where I was kneeling. "Fuck, that kid has bad timing."

Gray called for me again, sounding slightly closer than he had before and I threw on one of Chris' shirts that was crumpled up on the bed. Luckily, it fit me like a dress and covered everything that needed to be covered.

"I'm so sorry, babe," I flashed him an apologetic look. "I'll take care of him and you can take care of that."

I gestured to his still very hard and throbbing cock and the poor man looked like he wanted to cry as I hurried out of the room.

Turns out, Grayson was just thirsty so after a quick drink of water, I tucked him back into bed. By the time I returned to our bedroom, Chris was fast asleep as he lay sprawled out, still naked on top of the duvet. It looked as if he had just collapsed onto the bed and even though he was asleep, his face still showed his exhaustion. I felt a flash of sympathy as I pulled the blanket off the back of the chair in the corner of the room and covered him up with it, placing a soft kiss on his forehead before climbing in to my side of the bed.

-

August

Tags:  @maggotzombie @moonlacebeam @mizzzpink @zaylaugh @flowery-mess @flowerjewels @njrronaldo7 @hockeychick10 @partypoison00 @theladybiers @sidepieces @firoozehmoon @patzammit @sparkledfirecracker @mytbel0st @chvntelle-99

[storiesforallfandoms]

wap ~ machine gun kelly

word count: 1433

request?: yes!

@colsonbakerxxxxxx​ “CAN I REQUEST SOMETHING CALL ME CRAZY BUT CAN YOU DO READER X MGK BASED OFF THE SONG WAP SIDKKSKW”

description: cardi b’s new song gives her some new confidence that colson finds extremely sexy

pairing: machine gun kelly x female!reader

warnings: swearing, smut

masterlist

(Y/N) had never been all that confident in her body. Even with her own boyfriend, she had some insecurities that he had to help her out of. She hated to show her body off to anyone besides Colson. Not even her closest friends had ever seen her in less than a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.

That was, until Cardi B dropped her newest song during quarantine.

At first, she wasn’t too into the song. It wasn’t the type of music she listened to so she didn’t really have any interest in it. Her interest was peaked when Casie was showing her TikTok dances with the song, and she finally caved.

All it took was one listen to boost her confidence.

Before she knew it, (Y/N) was dancing around the apartment in just her lingerie, singing the lyrics loud and clear for anyone who was there to hear. She didn’t think anyone was around to hear her, until she heard Colson’s familiar laugh.

“This is certainly a sight to come home to,” he teased as he let his eyes linger over her body.

“I didn’t think you were home,” (Y/N) responded with a shrug, however she didn’t try to cover herself like she normally did when Colson caught her half naked by surprise.

“I’m definitely not complaining,” Colson continued. “I’m kinda enjoying it. You can keep doing whatever you were doing if you’d like.”

She was about to go put some clothes on when an idea came to her mind instead. “Hey, Casie showed me this TikTok dance by the way. Do you wanna see it? I think I can actually do this one.”

A confused look crossed Colson’s face. “Yeah? Okay, show me baby.”

She led him to the living room and pushed him down on the couch. His eyes widened at her new found confidence as she connected her phone to a speaker to play the song. She put on the part that was used in the TikToks and swallowed her nervousness.

“Now from the top, make it drop, that’s a wet ass pussy.”

Colson’s eyes widened as she laid down on the floor to do the booty popping dance move. A sense of confidence swelled in her then as she quickly moved to get up again.

“Bring a bucket and a mop for this wet ass pussy. I’m talking WAP, WAP, WAP, that’s some wet ass pussy.”

She watched him shuffle in his seat as she slid into a perfect split for the last dance move, making sure to land so that he could really get a good view of her ass in her thong.

“Macaroni in a pot, that’s some wet ass pussy.”

As the song faded, she pulled her legs up under her to sit up a bit. Colson was looking over her exposed body, letting his eyes drag over every inch of her.

“Casie showed you that, huh?” he asked.

A small giggle came from her as she slowly lowered herself onto her hands, placing herself in a position to start crawling. “She showed me a video for it, I may have become a little obsessed with learning the dance.”

She crawled towards Colson, resting her hands on his legs and slowly pushing them open as she looked up at him with innocent eyes. She could see a bulge beginning to grow in his pants.

“Who are you and what have you done with my sweet (Y/N)?” he asked, leaning forward to take her chin in his hand.

“I’m still your sweet (Y/N),” she responded, lowering her head towards his crotch. “Maybe I’m just feeling not as sweet right now.”

She pressed her lips against his clothed dick, causing Colson to suck in a breath. His hand found her hair and closed into a fist before pulling her head back. He lowered his lips to hers and kissed her deeply and passionately.

(Y/N) stood, untangling Colson’s hand from her hair, and pushed him back against the couch. She climbed onto his lap and kissed him as hard as he had kissed her before. His hands found her ass and gripped it hard, undoubtedly leading marks from his nails.

(Y/N)’s hand traveled between them to fondle with the button on Colson’s jeans. She parted from the kiss long enough to breathe, “I want these off.”

He held her with one arm as he pulled his pants and underwear off with the other, discarding them on the floor somewhere. (Y/N) lowered her clothed core onto him and grinded against his length, causing Colson to moan and even to whimper, a noise she had never heard from him before.

With one slender finger, Colson pulled aside her panties and ran a finger over her wet folds. (Y/N)’s head tipped back as she moaned in pleasure. Colson’s thumb found her sensitive clit and began to rub circles in it, sending waves of pleasure through her.

“I want you,” she breathed against his lips. “Fuck me right here Colson, please.”

Colson didn’t have to be told twice. (Y/N) whimpered at the loss of contact as he pulled his fingers away from her, but it was immediately replaced by a gasp as she felt his length line up with her opening.

(Y/N) had never been on top before, she liked it when Colson was on top, completely dominating her. But in that moment, she felt like she had complete control over Colson. So she let herself sink down onto his length, taking him into her completely. (Y/N) couldn’t help but gasp at the new feeling, and Colson took this as his opportunity to catch her lips with his again.

She took it slow at first, slowly rocking her hips to grind on him. Stuttered breaths came from Colson as his arms tightened around her and he buried his head in the crook of her neck. His muffled moans vibrated against the sweet spot on her neck, followed by soft kisses from Colson that were driving her wild.

She tried to keep the steady, slow pace as a way to tease her boyfriend, but the more she rocked against him the more pleasure she felt building up inside of her. She couldn’t help but start picking up the pace, rocking her hips against his at a quicker rate. Colson’s hands ran from her back down to her ass, lifting her up his length and letting her sink back down onto it again. He easily hit her g spot like that and she couldn’t contain the moans that were starting to get louder and louder, filling the entire room.

Before she knew it, she was feeling the familiar pressure build up in her stomach. Before she could say anything, Colson stuttered out, “F-Fuck baby, I’m gonna cum.”

“Cum in me, baby,” she whispered in his ear, nipping at his earlobe as she did so. “Fill me up with your hot cum.”

The dirty words coming from her otherwise clean and innocent mouth was enough to drive Colson over the edge. He leaned against the back of the couch, pulling her body with him, as he hit his climax. (Y/N) gasped at yet another unfamiliar feeling as he filled her. Seeing and hearing Colson coming undone, and knowing it was her doing, was hot enough to also cause (Y/N) to hit her own climax.

They sat for a while, tangled together as they tried to catch their breaths. Colson buried his head in her chest, his hair sticking to her bare skin with sweat.

“That was hot,” Colson said after some time. (Y/N) giggled at his response as she started to climb off of him. “I don’t know what gave you that confidence, but baby that was sexy.”

“I may have gained it from listening to Cardi B’s new song too much,” she admitted.

“If that’s what it takes, we’ll listen to Cardi B all day every day,” Colson told her. He took her hands in her and looked at her. “Baby, you’re so fucking beautiful and sexy, and I really want you to know that and believe that. I want you to see yourself the way I see you.”

(Y/N) smiled and kissed Colson again. “It helps having you tell me so much. Boosts my ego a little.”

“I’ll tell you every moment of every day. And I’ll let you take control like that more often. That was...wow.”

(Y/N) giggled again and kissed Colson one last time before getting up to clean herself off.

[kuronanox]

Bad Dream - Kira Izuru

Kira looks down at the paperwork in defeat as he groans and tried to reorganize them. The wind from the window was gusting everywhere causing them to fall on the floor.

Shuffling noises were in the background as he cursed under his breath.

A small feminine hand had reached over his as Kira eyes looked up to meet (Your Name).

"Need some help Kira Fukutaicho." She asks him as he looks down at the papers again.

"Did you need something?"

"I came to turn in some papers! I've been feeling under the weather."

He props the papers on the desk to even them out and turns to her. "If you don't feel good, get some more rest (Your Name)."

She shakes her head and hands him her work. "I can't let you run the Squad all alone."

Kira slightly smiles at her as he gave his attention back to his work.

She took in his features and noticed how much he didn't smile anymore, during the academy days he was so innocent and cheerful. Growing up they were close but now it seems as she didn't know him anymore.

"Did you want to come over for dinner tonight?" She asks him as he looked up from the papers.

"Who's going?" He asked with curiosity, Kira didn't wanna intrude on her personal life especially when one of the reasons why he was feeling down was because of her relationship with Hisagi.

"Just me and Shuhei! But don't worry he won't mind! I think he kinda misses you." She winks as he wanted to frown.

"Don't you think it's weird?" He says a bit rudely not noticing his tone of language as her eyes widen from disbelief. Noticing her face sadden a bit he cleared his throat. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it in that way. I'm actually behind on the Captains papers so I probably won't have time." He added.

"Well you don't have to do it alone! Shuhei is in the same position so maybe you guys could do it together and we can all drink a bit! I'll even invite Matsumoto Fukutaicho if it lightens the mood!"

Kira didn't want to be in the same room as (Your Name) and Shuhei. He tried to think anyway possible to escape tonight but she seemed on insisting he come out.

"I guess, what time tonight?"

"Around 8! I'll cook dinner!" She says with a smile on her face as she ran out happily.

Knowing it made her happy that he was coming out was okay with Kira even though he wasn't in the mood to socialize.

"Kira?" Shuhei asks with a smile as he got back from work while leaning his zanpakuto on the wall.

"Yes! He's seems down a lot recently so I thought inviting him to dinner would be a good way to have fun, oh Matsumoto is coming too!" (Your Name) said as she pulled out some veggies and protein out from the fridge.

Shuhei wrapped his arms around her body as he kissed her temple as she smiled while cutting the broccoli.

"That was nice of you, I've been worried about him." He tells her letting go and washing his hands to help prep with dinner.

"And I've been worry about you." (Your Name) states to Shuhei as he raises a brow and started to wash the rice.

There was a knock on the door before he could say anything.

"Hey we're here! Open up!" Rangiku cheerful voice rang around from outside as Kira was standing behind her with a tired expression.

"Hey! We just got started on dinner! Come on in!" (Your Name) welcomes them into her and Shuhei shared home.

It was Kira first time here, he took in the view. There was nothing really special that stood out to him except a few decor and a guitar in the living room. There was a few picture frame of the couple as they smiled to each other.

There was jealousy in the blonde lieutenant as he looked away from them and set a bottle of sake down he brought.

"Kira! Finally see you've been out of your own quarantine!" Shuhei greets him and pats him on the back.

"Slightly busy that's all." He tells the older man and smiles.

Rangiku sat down and cracked a sake open while they waited for dinner. She was in a cheerful mood today. "Oi we haven't been able to drink together in a while!" She tells Kira as he chuckles and gets himself a small cup.

"Likewise."

As him and Rangiku took small talk he could see in his peripheral version Shuhei and (Your Name) happily cooking together. There was small kisses stolen from each other as they were in sync.

"Dinner is served!" Shuhei yells placing down the rice, salmon and veggies along with miso soup to wash it down.

"Wow a chef in the house." Rangiku says as they all dug in.

"You guys started without us!" (Your Name) pouts noticing that two bottles of sake were already empty from Kira and the busty women sitting next to him.

"Ooo sorry that means y'all have to catch up!" She says as they poured themselves a cup.

Kira slightly smiles at (Your Name) cuteness as he took a bite of the fresh cooked fish. A part of him was thankful that it wasn't them three alone. He already didn't wanna talk much but the alcohol was kicking in and he was also thankful rangiku was there.

He didn't notice how hungry he was till a pair of chopsticks had put down a new piece of salmon in his bowl nonchalantly. It was (Your Name) as she was conversing with Rangiku about their new beauty routine with Shuhei listening and putting his input.

It felt like he was in the academy again, when he forgot to eat or wasn't eating enough (Your Name) was always feeding him and taking care of his health. The lieutenant knew she brought him out tonight so he could enjoy himself more.

"Thank you." He says as her flushed face smiles at him and went back to her conversation.

He blushed but it wasn't noticeable because of all the alcohol he already consumed.

"Kira you are particularly quiet for being drunk already!" Rangiku chimes in as he was lost for words.

"I- I am not drunk!"

"Sure you are! You finished 3 bottles alone already!" Shuhei laughs as he just groaned.

It was later in the night when it started to get rowdy, they all had a few to many as they were shouting to each other.

They were playing card games and gotten into it. They decided ride the bus because apparently kisuke had showed Rangiku a while back when she was in the human world. He told her it was a drinking game a lot of college students were doing so she wanted to hop on the trend.

"Kira you're on the bus so you have to keep drinking till you get these cards right!" She said as he took sips of the beer they had brought out for back up.

As he was drinking (Your Name) and Shuhei were cleaning a bit since it was getting messy.

Him and Rangiku were having to much fun that Shuhei retired for the because he had an early morning but he insisted on them staying and enjoying themselves.

By the time Kira won the card game he was sauced and couldn't walk in a straight line. He knew drinking with Rangiku was going to be a disaster.

"Did you want me to take him back?" He heard Rangiku ask (Your Name) as he was slumped on the table.

"It's okay, he can stay for the night. We work together anyways so I'll wake him up tomorrow." (Your Name) tells the older lady as she left for the night.

"Okay big boy, help me will ya." She tells Kira as she laid out a futon for him to sleep in comfortably.

He wrapped an arm around her waist as he walked towards the bed made on the floor. Tripping on his foot they fell over as she gasped.

"Kira you are crushing me!" She silently whispers so Shuhei wouldn't wake up from their shenanigans.

"Just let me hug you (Your Name)." He says breathlessly with his eyes closed. Kira wanted to enjoy this moment because he knew she could never be his.

"Kira?"

He looks down to her lips as she looked up to him innocently. A part of him didn't want to be the bad guy but what was so wrong with being bad once in a while.

He knew it was the alcohol bringing out everything he was holding in, he was going to regret his actions the next morning. Cupping her face he kissed her parted lips. It didn't help that she wrapped her legs around his waist as he groaned. Letting his tongue slip into her mouth.

She flipped him over so she sat on top, just when things were beginning to get spicy he opened his eyes and.

"KIRA IZURU! You wake up this instant now!" He heard a voice called out as he jumped out of bed and looked to his side to see a concern (Your Name) next to him. She sighed in relief and pushed his hair out of the way from his face.

"Are you dating Hisagi San?!" He asks quickly out of breath as she tilted her head and slightly smacks his forehead.

"Ow!"

"Hello! What were you dreaming about? I'm dating you stupid." She says as he calmed down a bit and laughs rubbing the back of his neck.

"It was just a dream, thank goodness."

(Your Name) looked confused as she jumped on top of Kira and laid her head on his chest.

"Whatever it was Izuru I'm always going to be yours." She says as he laid back down and rubbed her back. He was cheesing to himself to know (Your Name) wasn't going anywhere.

"I know, it was just a dream." He says as she kissed his lower lip and grinned.

"I love you, you know that."

"Of course, I love you too, always."

(Authors note: just a cute fluff I made! Have y'all seen Kira now! He's making me simp! noooo I already have my bleach bias and he's breaking it!)

[mellowswriting]

Hey I saw your requests are open! I love the quarantine series! I’ve been on a Marcus pike kick lately and I’ve been super stressed about college and my work load trying to graduate😩 I’d love to hear your interpretation of Marcus when his girl is going through this cause you know he’s 💕that guy💕 - how he’d help you relax and everything... maybe even some smut if you’re feeling up to it 👀

Take a Break

pairing || Marcus Pike x Fem!Reader

summary || Marcus helps you relax after college stress

word count || 2,369

warnings || Explicit Sexual Content (fingering, praise kink, soft dom!Marcus, allusions to p in v sex), stressed out reader, Marcus to the rescue, domestic fluff, ‘good girl’, no use of y/n

a/n || As a college student who is also ready to explode from school stress, this was cathartic as hell to write. I hope you enjoy!

Masterlist  |  Join the taglist!

Your cursor hovered over the submit button. This research paper had been the center of your academic focus for nearly three months and had taken up the majority of your energy for far too long. Once that damn paper was submitted, you could breathe easy for a while and not have to see statistics and graphs in your sleep anymore. So you took a deep breath and hit the button, relishing in the relief that washed over you - for approximately three seconds.

There were still assignments to be worked on, textbook chapters to read and take notes on, and you just wanted to throw your laptop into the ocean instead. Fuck it all. In that moment, all of your progress and hard work and the finish line that was so damn close really didn’t seem to matter. You would rather hide under your blankets for the last month of the semester than even think about philosophy notes or biology tests.

But you couldn’t.

There was no way in hell you were going to let the last two years of hard work and a solid grade point average go down the drain, especially when you had a summer well on its way where you could relish in not having academic responsibilities. You rubbed a hand down your face with a frustrated sigh and put your textbook down on your desk - maybe just a bit harder than necessary, because the door creaked open a few moments later.

“How’s the paper going, honey?” Oh, Marcus. Your sweet, sweet Marus, who’s words were already making tears of frustration prick your eyes.

“It’s finished. I just turned it in.” You said, your voice devoid of the usual pride that followed a well-written assignment, and flipped open the book in front of you.

Marcus’s hands fell to your shoulders as he stood behind your chair and started rubbing, those strong fingers working the tension from your muscles. “What are you doing then?”

“I still have a ton of shit that needs to get done. Notes and a ton of reading, and I have to study -” You cut yourself off with a heaved breath. The stress was getting to you, you could recognize that, but it wasn’t enough to overpower the anxiety of impending deadlines, even if you still had plenty of time and wiggle room to get them finished.

Marcus paused. It wasn’t the first time he had seen you like this, and he wasn’t about to discount what you were feeling by telling you to relax or something else equally as stupid. “Okay, how about you come have lunch with me? You need a break. You can’t be productive when you’re burnt out. Maybe we can talk it out, help you come up with a plan.”

It took a moment for you to convince yourself that it was okay to leave your desk, to focus on something that wasn’t your classes for a little bit. When you nodded, Marcus smiled at you bright enough to melt some of the frustration. Unbeknownst to you, he had a little something planned.

If there was anything true in the world, it was that Marcus Pike was the best man the world had ever seen. The stress you were feeling had been building up for the past week, growing heavier with each moment that it went unchecked, and he could tell. It was obvious in the way you held yourself, in the way that all the sleep in the world didn’t help the tired look in your eyes. He knew he could do nothing to help with the actual classwork itself, but he could do whatever it took to ease the stress.

So the moment you essentially chained yourself to your desk, Marcus set about with his plan. First, he tackled the housework. He cleaned the kitchen and living room until they were spotless, grateful that your headphones blocked out the sound of the vacuum and kept his little project a secret. Then he cooked up your favorite meal and lit your candles in the living room, leaving the space warm and homey.

The surprise on your face was worth all of the effort. You buried your face in his shirt to hide the tears of appreciation that sprung into your eyes, your fingers fisted in the fabric as you tried not to full on cry at his sweet gesture. You sniffled a quiet laugh before you wiped the wetness away from your face.

“God, what would I do without you?” You pulled him close for a kiss, one he reciprocated eagerly. Those big, warm hands of his settled on your cheeks, thumbs rubbing sweet little circles against your cheekbones.

“I find myself asking the same thing everyday I get to wake up next to your pretty face.” He whispered against your lips and gave you one last kiss before he guided you to sit on the couch with your soft throw blanket tucked around your shoulders.

“Marcus… you didn’t have to do all this…” You murmured as he handed you a plate and settled in next to you with his own.

“Of course I did,” He rubbed a soothing hand up and down your calf. “Besides, this isn’t even everything.”

You captured his hand in your own. “I love you so, so much.”

“I love you, too.” Marcus chirped with a smile, lifting your joined hands to kiss your knuckles. “Now eat up, you need your energy.”

Never in your life had you felt more appreciated, more taken care of, and apparently this wasn’t all he had planned. He finished eating before you - you swear, that man practically inhales food - and he drew your feet into his lap to gently massage the arches. It didn’t take him long to ease the stress of the looming workload. Somehow, he always managed to find the perfect words to remind you just how capable you are and that you were on the right track.

You set your plate down on the coffee table and slid closer to Marcus’s side, all too ready to curl up with your lover and spend the rest of the day soaking in the bliss that flowed from him, but he was quick to stand and urge you to your feet. The moment of confusion dissipated when he led you to the bathroom, where he had laid out the makings of your favorite stress reliever - a bubble bath.

“Oh, Marcus.” You sighed as he began filling the huge tub, already stripping out of your clothes in excitement. “You better get in there with me.”

“But this is supposed to be about you, not me.” Marcus said with a small shrug.

“I’ll enjoy it even more if I have my man with me,” You purred, stepping into his space in only your bra and underwear to press a lingering kiss to his lips. The surprised hum he gave you made a little thrill fly through you. “Please, baby?”

“Anything for you.” Marcus smiled as he reached around to undo your bra and pull the straps down your arms, moving on to curl his fingers under the hem of your underwear and tug them down as well. He kissed your thigh when you moved to step out of them.

Marcus yanked his clothes off with no flair and stepped into the steaming bath, settling into the water so quickly that it damn near sloshed over the sides of the tub. He reached for you and you couldn’t help but smile. It was precious, the way he guided you into his lap amidst the bubbles and pulled you close against his chest.

Little kisses were peppered along your shoulder and up your neck, the heat already working at your sore back. Marcus’s hands slid up your belly, cupped beneath your breast to hold you close, and the combination of his presence with the heat and soft floral scent of the bubbles had your worries slipping into the background.

“I missed this.” You murmured as you melted against him, your head lolled back on his shoulder. It had been far too long since you felt peace like that. Marcus’s fingers rubbed soft patterns into your skin and you were in heaven.

“Me too,” He kissed your temple and you could feel the smile on his lips.

“Thank you, Marcus.” You looked up at him. He seemed just as relaxed as you felt, his head tilted back against the edge of the tub, eyes closed. “You make me feel sane in the midst of all this stress. I don’t know what I would do without your support. You’re such a good man.”

Marcus whined low in his throat. Your praise always did something to him, lit a fire in his belly and made him want to squirm with happiness. All he ever wanted was to make you happy, make you feel as cherished and loved as he possibly could, at least as much as you made him feel. Normally he was good with his words. He could wax poetic about how much he loved you and how he was the luckiest man alive with you by his side, but your sweetness left him dumbstruck.

Since his mouth couldn’t form the words he wanted to say, he used it to lavish your bare skin with kisses as he rubbed at your tense muscles, your skin slick with the soapy water. He could feel the small moan he worked from your body and smirked - he absolutely lived for those little sounds, the ones that told him he was making you feel relaxed and happy. Your hands slipped down his thighs that bracketed your body and began mimicking the circles he massaged you with.

“Aren’t I supposed to be the one helping you relax, sweetheart?” Marcus teased despite the way his cock was slowly hardening at the small of your back, only provoked further by the light drag of your nails along his thighs.

“Can you think of a better way to relax?” You teased right back as you arched back slightly to grind against him, using your hands on his thighs to support yourself. Marcus inhaled sharply and you could feel the subtle way his hips pressed up to meet your movements. Need began to build low in your belly.  

“Are you sure?” Marcus rasped and at your nod, his hands slipped around to your front, one hand settling low between your hips to firmly hold you against him, the other trailing down to cup your sex. Your low gasp made him hum, a dark tone that you recognized from those moments he took you apart piece by piece in the comfort of your bed. “Are you feeling needy, baby?”

“Always need you.” You spread your thighs, bracing your feet between the sides of the tub and his legs to support your desperate little grinds against his fingers. His middle finger curled to glide up to your clit but he didn’t give you the friction you craved, that damn tease. “C’mon, make me feel good. Please?”

The desperate quality your voice had taken on was enough to make Marcus moan against your neck, his tongue shooting out to wet his lips before he whispered in your ear. “I’m gonna make you come before I get you in that bed. A little reward for all your hard work, hm?”

Before you could even whine out your need for his promised reward, he finally began moving his finger against your clit and pleasure flooded you, leaving you to meet his movements with little circles of your waist. Marcus would usually tease you at least a little before delving in and drowning you in pleasure until your legs were shaking and your mind was left blank, but he seemed to be in a giving mood after all of your efforts. Every pass of his fingers over your clit had that tension pull tighter, your pussy tightening around nothing. You ached for something to fill you, his fingers, his cock, you didn’t care. The relief of pleasure after so much stress had your release building faster than you were used to, and your hands fumbled for purchase to keep you grounded to reality as Marcus worked you closer and closer to orgasm.

One hand clutched at his wrist, desperate to keep him right where you had him, and the other found itself buried in Marcus’s hair. He angled his head to give your better access, letting you grab at him to be your anchor, kissing up your neck and placing his lips right at your ear.

“Good girl,” He rumbled, chuckling at your sweet little gasp. “Such a good girl for me. You gonna cum all over my fingers, aren’t you? Yeah, you are. That's it.”

“Oh god, Marcus…” You gasp in that pleading tone that made something possessive bloom in his belly and he redoubled his efforts, taking your earlobe between his teeth and tugging slightly. “Fuck!”

Water sloshed over the sides of the tub with the intense way you jerked against him, your orgasm cracking through you like a sharp flash of lightning, arcing and splintering up your spine and leaving you wrapped in a warm haze. You trembled against his chest, your legs snapping closed around his hand as he slowed his movements until his fingers were completely still. The warm water eased you even further into that sweet headspace of your afterglow, made more sweet by the kisses and praise your lover pressed into your skin.

“You still with me?” Marcus murmured and you looked up at him with that dazed look he absolutely adored. At the sight of your pursed lips, he leaned down and kissed you, slow and languid as he let you find yourself again. Wandering hands helped ease you back down to earth, his strong hands working at your already loose muscles. “You did so good, sweetheart. I’m so proud of you.”

You whined quietly at his praise, curling closer for more kisses and affection, only to whine again when he pulled away. “Please?”

Marcus chuckled. “Fine, but I’m getting you in that bed in a few minutes. I’m gonna fuck you so hard you forget your own name.”

{Taglist}

@iamburdened @everyhowlmarksthedead @jenrebloggingfics @xserenax-13 @silverstarsandsuns @luminescentlily @peterpstuff @leonieb @lazybeeches @withasideofmeg @freeshavocadoooo @chattychell @ew-erin @i-ship-it-ironically @artsymaddie @mrsparknuts @wyn-dixie @notabotiswear @lunaserenade @jitterbugs927 @theorganasolo @the-witty-pen-name @northernpunk @lemonlime09 @la-lunaluna @andruxx @greeneyedblondie44 @bloodsuckingbastards @coldlilheart @gracie7209 @green-socks @paintballkid711 @lord-of-restingbiface @asta-lily @sarahjkl82-blog @a-skov @himbotroy @marvelousmermaid 

[mediocre-writerr]

almost is never enough [toni shalifoe]

toni shalifoe x reader

requested: I had to reread Almost as soon as I finishes, perhaps an even angstier and fluffier part 2? (maybe something like the girls getting to watch the pain and stress y/n is being put through on her own through a live cam)

*not my gif*

Unbreakable. Not being able to cave under pressure, staying calm cool and collected. That’s what you like to think you are, especially on the outside. Sitting at this interrogation table yet again, but with no comfort that your friends are around. But at least there was the comfort knowing that they’re safe.

You may have been unbreakable on the outside. But the stress and the psychological torture they were playing on you was killing you slowly. But you have to stay strong for the girls. Who have got to be telling our story by now.

“So Shelby Goodkind, your best friend?” the middle aged lady, you learned as Gretchen says. You just nod, not wanting to say anything else, “How did you two meet?”

“School.”

“And how did you two get here?”

You shrugged, “Her parents came up with the idea. I wanted to go with. But I guess you already knew that.”

“And you decided to go with her why?” she asked.

Shrugging, yet again, “She had a rough year. You can’t really blame me for wanting to go with her, especially after what she went through.”

“And what did she go through?” she said, folding her hands.

You mocked her motions, “I’m not telling you anything.”

Little did you know, Agent Young set up a live stream so the girls knew you were okay. And their eyes haven’t left it since it started playing.

“That was the whole deal. I have agents watching their every move. You don’t tell me anything and there back to where they’re started.” she threatened and your face fell.

“You can’t do that! They deserved an out!” you screamed at her, the stress causing your whole demeanor to change.

She sat back with a smirk on her face, “And you didn’t?”

“No I didn’t! Those girls are my life! My family!” you yelled, “They deserved way more than what went on in that island! Nora, your little spy, dead! Jeanette, dead! Martha, dead! Rachel, lost her hand! All of us here have to go through months and possibly a whole life time of trauma for this sick experiment!!”

“We need to get her back.” Shelby mumbled to the other girls, “She’s cracking. She’s not gonna take much longer.”

“We’re almost there girls, don’t worry.” FBI agent, Aaron Hotchner said, from the front of the van.

The girls went straight to the authorities. They didn’t want to waste any time to relax when your life was at risk in that quarantine area. The livestream still playing as they watched your every move.

“It’s not a sick experiment. It grew all of you didn’t it?” she asked, “Shelby became who she really wanted to be. Toni wasn’t so angry at the world and let love in. Rachel no longer striving for perfection where it isn’t needed. Dot has learned that she doesn’t have to grow up so fast. Fatin and Leag realized their own true potential. And you grew to be such an amazing woman.”

“That doesn’t face the facts that all of us almost died! That we lost 3 girls out there! And not once did you think about stopping it! Not after Jeanette or Nora or Martha!” you screamed, “We did not go through what we went through in that island just for you to find shit on us to prevent us from suing you and throwing your ass in jail.”

“Y/N, we know.” Gretchen said.

“Know what?!”

“Everything that happened back home. We have leverage on most of you girls, that we can blackmail you about.” she explained, “One false move and all of it is history. So tell us what you know.”

You spring up from off your seat about to punch her right in the face when she made a tsk tsk tsk noise. Shaking her head and standing up, “You see one punch and boom the entire court case you will pull will be compromised.” two agents that you’ve never seen before grabbed both of your arms, “But it won’t compromise mine.”

She put on a brass knuckle that an agent handed her and hit you square in the face. You could feel the metal slash right through your flesh.

“No!” the girls yelled in the van, all of them beginning to freak out.

“Agent Hotchner, you need to drive faster.” Leah yelled at him.

“I’m going as fast as I can.” he turned on the signals and sirens, passing through everything he can.

The other blonde FBI agent Jareau looked back at all of our worried faces and that the screen, “Sir, the suspect is attacking.”

And that’s when he really pushed on the gas.

“Fuck you.” you spat, blood dripping from your face and mouth.

“You keep talking to me like that, let’s see what happens. There’s no one here to save you anymore. So tell me what you know...”

You looked up at her with a blood-stained teeth smile, “Never.”

And just when she was about to hit you the door flung open. You were dropped immediately as a team of FBI agents came walking in with their guns drawn.

“Gretchen Klein, you are under arrest. Put your hands in the air. Weapon off.” Agent Hotchner announced. She bedrungily took off the brass knuckle and got down on her knees with her hands up.

“Hey, hey. You can’t go in there!” one of the agents yelled, but the girls didn’t listen. Shelby and Toni rushed towards you faster than anyone else.

Toni held you in her arms, while Shelby examined your injuries. You smiled at them, “Hey...hey guys.”

They both let out a breath of relief, “Hey Y/N.”

“My face hurts.” you whispered. Toni placed a small kiss to your forehead.

“I know, but you’re still beautiful.” she whispered.

“We got you Y/N. Let’s go home.” Shelby whispered as you passed out in there arms.

///

tag list/ @hstoria @greysky22 @shalifoestilinski @yourssincerelyj

[pickalilywrites]

Halu! I love reading your rivetra fics especially the heart skips a beat <3 you're such a great writer! was hoping if you can try to write rivetra modern au during the pandemic? :D

here you go~ ah, i always take a long time to write now, but at least it was out before the pandemic is over ^^" (as much as i would like it to be over ...) i hope you like it ~

---------------------

Love in the Time of COVID-19

Rivetra. COVID-19 Pandemic AU.

9543 words.

Read on Ao3!

Levi Ackerman is hugely germaphobic and antisocial. For him, the COVID-19 global pandemic is simultaneously the worst and best thing that has ever happened. People have finally begun to wash their filthy hands, cover their mouths with the crook of their elbows when they sneeze, and wear masks over their mouths to slow the spread of airborne contamination. All non-essential workers have stopped going outdoors, which makes Levi look less like a recluse and more like a normal person.

Of course, even these basic precautions couldn’t stop the coronavirus outbreak from growing into a full-blown pandemic. Maybe if everyone were more like Levi — washing their hands for a full five minutes rather than the CDC’s recommendation of a measly twenty seconds, bringing around a pack of disinfecting wipes and wiping down everything he touches, and rubbing his hands with hand sanitizer at least three times after he touches anything — the world wouldn’t be in this mess.

The worst thing about this pandemic, however, isn’t the fact that people are taking the bare minimum precautions, but the people who aren’t taking any precautions at all. For every person wearing a mask, there are at least ten people outside not wearing a mask. Hell, there are even people dying in the hospital of COVID that are convinced this whole pandemic is a hoax rather than a mess of their own making because they refuse to wash their own hands. It’s because of these people that Levi has to be especially careful on the few occasions he leaves his apartment, stripping off all his clothes as soon as he walks through his door and tossing them in the laundry basket before he takes a shower with scalding hot water to kill off all the germs he may have brought home with him.

For the most part though, Levi doesn’t mind pandemic life. It’s a lot like his life pre-pandemic, but he disinfects everything twice as much as he normally did before COVID. As a data analyst, he hardly went into the office anyway and he didn’t bat an eyelash when his company declared that everyone would be working from home until further notice. With delivery services becoming more popular, Levi found it was easier to get things delivered to his apartment. Even his neighbors are bearable. People are too busy working to be a bother during work hours and by the end of the day they’re too tired to do anything except turn on Netflix until they fall asleep on the couch. Really, Levi doesn’t have a problem with anyone except the woman living in the unit next to him.

Prior to COVID, Levi wasn’t even aware of her existence. He sometimes heard about her from the chatty woman in the unit across from him. The nosy woman somehow miraculously knew when Levi (or anyone, really) would be coming out of their apartments, popping out and ensnaring them in a conversation that always seemed fifteen minutes too long.

The gossipy woman loved the person who occupied the unit next to Levi’s. Levi’s next-door neighbor had moved in a few months before the pandemic started and was never at home, the talkative neighbor explained, because she was an actress.

“An actress in the theater. Musical theater, darling,” the woman emphasized, her eyes as wide as saucers like being in theater was the most magnificent thing anyone could ever do. “Poor dear is never home though. If she’s not rehearsing or on a show, she’s working part-time jobs at the diner downtown.”

Levi didn’t think very much of it after hearing about the woman next door for the first hundred times. It wasn’t his business what other people did. Anyway, if the woman was hardly ever home, that was even better. Except now that there’s a pandemic and everyone is required to stay home, the woman is home almost all the time and if Levi hadn’t believed the woman had a career in theater, he certainly does now.

The woman likes to sing on the balcony after work hours. It’s considerate of her but somehow also very infuriating to Levi because he can’t complain that he’s working. She also stops at an appropriate time (usually 8 or 9 at the latest), so it’s not as if Levi can send in a noise complaint without feeling like a dick. He just has to grit his teeth and listen to his neighbor belt out “If I Loved You” from Carousel while he cooks dinner.

She doesn’t have a bad voice either. It’s just that it’s incredibly loud. He supposes if she were any quieter, she wouldn’t be any good for musical theater. Maybe his other apartment neighbors are elated to have a living Disney princess sing for them for free every night, but it’s grating to the ears if you’re living right next door.

He probably should have said something when she started singing more dramatic songs, songs that crescendoed and built into a climax that Levi could probably hear if he were living on the other side of the apartment. It’s those goddamn musical ballads that Levi hates the most. If it’s upbeat, at least Levi knows what’s coming but those ballads always have to build and build until the woman is belting out to the heavens.

Levi thought he could bear it. Surely, the pandemic would only last for a few more weeks or even another month or two, but new coronavirus cases kept climbing and Levi knew he’d be listening to entire one-woman musicals for the next year if he didn’t say anything. One night when the woman begins yet another musical ballad, Levi finally throws open the sliding door to his balcony and is surprised when he sees his next-door neighbor sitting cross-legged on her balcony, a pink floral mask on her face, and a guitar in her lap.

The woman stops strumming her guitar and looks up, her amber eyes wide with surprise. “Hi,” she says, voice slightly muffled through her mask. She waves awkwardly at Levi even though he’s frozen in place on his balcony and hasn’t made any move to greet her.

“Why are you wearing a mask?” he asks her as if he’s not wearing one too. It makes sense that he’s wearing one. He always wears a mask when he steps outside even if there’s nobody around. He knows most people don’t because they don’t see the point if nobody else is around, so why is she wearing one?

The woman’s nose scrunches up from under her mask while her eyebrows are knit in confusion. “We’re in a pandemic. Isn’t that why you’re wearing one, too?” the woman asks, gesturing towards Levi and then her own mask. She pauses for a moment as if thinking about whether or not she should continue. “Also, I heard you’re a huge germaphobe.”

“Who told you that?” Levi snaps.

“The lady who lives across from you,” the woman replies.

Ah. That explains a lot.

“But I don’t even come out here that regularly,” Levi points out.

The woman shrugs. “Just in case. It’s better to be safe than sorry anyway,” the woman says. “And it’s not like it’s a big deal to wear a mask.”

Levi’s not sure if it’s because he’s been stuck in his house for months, but he’s just fallen a little bit in love with this woman and it’s all because she said wearing a mask isn’t that much of an inconvenience. He doesn’t even know her name. After meeting for five seconds and realizing that she’s considerate for wearing a mask on the off chance that Levi might go out on the balcony, Levi’s starting to feel like a dick for coming out here to yell at her for singing too loud. She’s a lovely singer, really, and he should probably be thankful she’s not a part of a screamo metal rock band or something.

Levi fights the urge to disappear in his apartment. He slides the glass door behind him, trapping himself outside on the balcony and forcing himself to speak more with the woman. He’s not exactly sure what he should say. Should he ask her name? Compliment her singing? Ask her about how she’s handling quarantine? He sits down cross-legged facing her.

“What song were you singing?” he ends up asking the woman.

“Oh,” the woman says as if she’s surprised Levi’s still speaking with her. She looks skyward, trying to recall the name. “‘Please Don’t Make Me Love You.’ It’s from the Dracula musical.”

“Oh.” Levi hadn’t been aware that there was even a musical adaptation of the Bram Stoker gothic novel.

“Yeah, I know,” the woman says with another nose scrunch, her mask shifting upward from the movement. “There’s a musical for everything nowadays.” She hums a few notes and strums a few chords across her guitar. “But what about you? How are you spending your quarantine?”

“Me?” Levi repeats. “I just … am hanging in there.”

“That’s good,” the woman says. Levi can’t see her smile behind her mask, but he does see the edge of her eyes crinkle. She sets her guitar beside her and leans back on her palms. Her head tilts to the side and her ginger hair falls away from her lithe neck. “I’m Petra, by the way. I don’t think we’ve ever formally met.”

That’s probably because Levi has never made the effort to be neighborly. In fact, the only reason they’re meeting right now is because Levi was going out here to complain about her singing, but he won’t mention that. Instead, he shrugs and says, “Levi.” It’s a lame introduction. Even he cringes at it, but Petra doesn’t seem to mind.

“I’ve never seen you out here, but maybe because I’m only on the balcony in the evenings,” Petra says. She picks idly at the guitar strings, letting their sound reverberate with every twang before she moves onto the next string. She stops suddenly and looks at Levi, eyebrow raised. “Oh, you didn’t come out here because it was too loud, did you? I know my voice is pretty … resonant, especially in a small space like this.” She winces apologetically.

Levi is thankful that his mask is able to cover the blush that is surely rising in his cheeks. “N-no,” he stammers. He sits up a little straighter as if this will somehow make him a less obvious liar. “I just … wanted some fresh air.”

“Mmm, makes sense,” Petra hums. Her eyes crinkle again and Levi’s heart does something weird in his chest. “Good to get some fresh air circulating in the apartment. I always have my air filter on nowadays too.”

Levi realizes with horror that she’s absolutely right. He usually keeps his apartment windows closed, opening them only in the early morning and the late evening for the fresh air. He hadn’t accounted for the lack of fresh air in the entire apartment complex. There’s no telling whose dirty air he’s been breathing these past months. Sure, he has at least one air filter in every room, but he can’t count on these machines to filter out every germ flying around the air. Why hadn’t he accounted for the poor air circulation through the building before this? He should have been keeping his windows open this entire time. The air outside is filled with germs as well, but the concentration of germs from other people who may or may not be spreading COVID within this apartment complex is much higher here than it is inside.

Levi stands up, grabbing the railing of his balcony for support. He feels a little dizzy right now and has the frantic urge to clean his entire apartment again even though he had cleaned it this morning. This time, he’ll be sure to deep clean the carpet.

“I have to go,” he tells Petra, but he doesn’t give her the reason. He doesn’t want her to think he’s an idiot for not thinking about air circulation sooner.

Petra raises her eyebrows as if she’s surprised and perhaps a little bit sorry to see him go. “Alright then,” she says. She picks up her guitar once more, strumming a few pleasant chords. “Have a good evening, Levi. It was nice meeting you.”

Levi pauses at the door. “You, too,” he says finally before he slips inside. He makes sure to leave the door open. The lack of barrier makes it easier for Petra’s voice to carry into his apartment. That’s not why he leaves his door open, of course. It's purely for the fresh air to come in, or at least that’s what Levi tells himself.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Levi does not know why the news of the woman next door intrigues his friends so much. He had casually mentioned her once on a video call with them and now they won’t stop asking him about her, constantly requesting updates on little tedious things like the songs she had sung the night before and if she still wears her mask. Even more surprising, Levi finds he can’t ignore their questions and answers each and every one. He tells himself it’s because he knows their curiosity will never be quenched until he answers their inquiries and it’s better to respond than to be bombarded with the same question a half dozen more times.

“So you guys talk to each other every night?” Isabel asks. She sits closer to her laptop and her face fills the little square with her name in the right-hand corner. Her hands sit in her hands and she has a thoughtful pout on her lips. “That’s a lot, Levi.”

“We talk to each other every night,” Levi points out.

“And you complained that it was a lot!” Isabel says, which is true. He would have been satisfied with weekly Zoom calls or even fortnightly, but Isabel had insisted that going so long without seeing Levi and Farlan onscreen would drive her mad. “But that doesn’t seem to be the case with this mysterious next-door neighbor.”

“She’s hardly mysterious,” Levi snorts.

“She’s right, though,” Farlan comments. He isn’t perched at the tip of his seat. Unlike Isabel, he’s less intrigued about Levi’s new relationship with his neighbor and more amused about the whole thing. “You’ve never been interested in people enough to have regular meetups with them even if it’s a ‘coincidental’ meeting on the balcony every night.” Levi despises the way Farlan uses air quotes.

“It’s very Romeo and Juliet,” Isabel says with a nod. There’s a silence at the other end and Isabel adds, “Because of the balcony. Except this time there are two balconies and nobody is dying. Hopefully.”

Levi rolls his eyes. “I just bump into her more often now that I go out to get fresh air now,” Levi explains. It’s a part of his routine now. Better to breathe good, clean (or at least cleaner) air than continue to breathe in apartment air that has been god knows where. “Which, by the way, you two should really consider as well. Who knows what germs are floating around in your apartment complexes?”

Isabel wrinkles her nose. “If that were a problem, I would have gotten COVID by now,” she points out, and Levi wants to groan. He doesn’t want to explain to her once more that, after exposure to the virus, contracting COVID is a game of chance and she’s just been lucky. There’s no telling how much luckier she can get as the pandemic continues.

“I’ll consider it,” Farlan says, and Levi is at least grateful for that. He taps his fingers on his desk. Farlan’s microphone is so sensitive that Levi can hear the tap, tap, tapping noise on the other end. “But that neighbor of yours … what do you guys even talk about every night?”

“I don’t know just … stuff, I guess,” Levi mumbles. He rubs at the back of his neck. He can’t quite recall what he and Petra talked about yesterday on their balconies. Their conversations always start out similarly with her asking Levi about his day and Petra asking about his, and by the time Levi retreats into his apartment he finds that an hour has already passed. After a moment, he says, “Well, she told me about how she was sewing face masks in her free time so that she could donate them.”

“Oooh,” Isabel coos. Her head is in her hands again and she looks starry-eyed. “This girl sure has everything, doesn’t she? Not only is she cute, but she takes COVID safety precautions seriously and she cares about other people? No wonder you’re so interested in her, Levi.”

Levi’s mind stutters for a moment. “When did I say she was cute?” he stammers.

“Is she not cute?” Farlan asks with a raised eyebrow.

Levi’s knee-jerk response is to say “no” just because he knows a “yes” will elicit more teasing from Isabel, but the question Farlan asks makes Levi realize that he’s never seen Petra without her mask off. Prior to this realization, Levi has never minded seeing Petra with a mask on. After all, they’re both still in a pandemic and, even if neither of them show visible symptoms of COVID, it’s possible that they could still transmit the virus from their minimal outings for groceries or other daily tasks that require them to leave the apartment. Now that he’s realized it though, he’s overcome with this strange desire to see Petra’s face behind the mask.

There’s only so much one can see of a person when they’re wearing a mask. Levi knows the top half of Petra’s face quite well: slender, expressive eyebrows, large eyes the color of amber, and even the dip of the bridge of her nose. Anything beyond that is a mystery to him, hidden behind the cloth of Petra’s mask. He doesn’t know what kind of nose she has, if it’s grand and shapely or sweet and button-shaped or adorably upturned. He doesn’t know the curve of her lips, if she has a well-defined cupid’s bow or thick, full lips the color of petals. Judging by the state of the pandemic right now, it’s unlikely that he’ll find out anytime soon and he can’t fathom requesting Petra take off her mask just to satisfy his newfound curiosity.

“I don’t know what she looks like,” Levi finally says.

Farlan snorts and Isabel erupts into peals of laughter.

“You’ve been talking to her for how long and you don’t know what she looks like?” Isabel titters. She’s even wiping tears from her eyes, although Levi doesn’t think the situation is that humorous. “It’s not like you guys are wearing hazmat suits when you sit on the balcony.”

“It’s not like I don’t know what she looks like at all,” Levi grumbles. “But we’ve been wearing masks this whole time whenever we’ve gone out on the balcony to talk to each other.”

“Aren’t your balconies, like, more than six feet apart? You guys could probably take your masks off and it’d be fine,” Isabel points out. She sees Levi open his mouth to speak and she rolls her eyes, giving him a dismissive wave of her hand. “Okay, fine, just wear your masks like the hypochondriacs you are! If it’ll make you feel better about the ‘sick game of roulette viruses play when infecting us,’ go right ahead!”

Levi scowls. He wishes he could kick Isabel out of the Zoom chat, but Farlan has forbidden Levi to do that after Levi cut short the first Zoom call he hosted and Farlan has been the host of their Zoom calls ever since. Thus, Levi has had to sit through various Zoom calls with Isabel mocking his informative lectures on infections and diseases. On the bright side, at least she remembers Levi’s lectures well enough to recite them back to him even if it is in a sarcastic tone.

In a tiny square on Levi’s screen, Farlan watches with an amused expression on his face.

“What?” Levi asks.

“You could ask her if she’s comfortable with taking her mask off,” Farlan suggests.

“I can’t just ask her that!” Levi splutters. He gets embarrassed at the idea of it — just outright asking Petra as if it’s as simple as asking her about the weather or what her favorite color is.

Isabel rolls her eyes. “It’s not like you’re asking her to take off her shirt or something,” she says.

If Levi’s face wasn’t red yet, it certainly is now.

“Ignore her,” Farlan says. “But, you know, it is just a mask and you keep yourself extremely safe and she adheres to the CDC guidelines pretty well from what you tell us. If you two are both comfortable with it, why not just ask?”

Because it’s exactly as they’re saying: it’s not like asking her to take off her shirt. In a way, asking her to take off her mask is infinitely more dangerous and intimate than asking her to take off any other article of clothing. COVID-19 is a virus that is spread through aerosol droplets from infected persons. By asking Petra to remove her mask, Levi would ultimately be asking Petra to lower her defenses to these droplets and increase her chances of getting infected. If Petra were to ask him to remove his mask, Levi isn’t sure he would be able to say ‘yes’ for these very same reasons.

It’s something Levi mulls over even after the call ends and Isabel and Farlan bid him adieu for the night. He thinks about it in bed, imagining a different COVID-infected universe in which he musters up the courage to ask Petra to lower her mask for him and she says yes, revealing a beaming smile behind her mask when she lowers it for the first time. For some reason, just thinking about her smile and how it might look — if she has bunny teeth that stick out, if she has a cute underbite, if her teeth are just a little bit crooked, if she bothers to put on lip balm under her mask or if she forgets and leaves her lips chapped — makes it difficult for Levi to sleep. He spends his night tossing and turning in bed, haunted by a smile he’s never seen.

The thought of Petra’s smile follows him into the morning and well into the day. It’s all he thinks about as he cleans his apartment in the morning, he writes line after line of code at work, and as he cleans it once more in the afternoon. It’s all he thinks about as he opens the door to his balcony for his evening chat with Petra. It’s all he’s thinking about as he sits across from her and she tells him about his day.

He’s not brave enough to ask her to take off her mask, but he keeps thinking of it. He watches the movement of Petra’s mask as her lips move beneath it. If he concentrates hard enough, he thinks he can see the trace of her mouth, can imagine the outline of her lips when she purses her mouth in a pout or when he thinks her lower lip sticks out as she ponders what to talk about next.

“When do you think we’ll be able to take off our masks?” Levi asks. He’s brave enough to ask this at least.

“Hmm,” Petra hums, and Levi swears he sees the shadow of her lips pressed in that thoughtful pout once more. It drives him crazy. “Maybe when enough people get vaccinated. It should be a few months? My friend mentioned it a little while ago. They said it’s amazing how quickly mRNA vaccines are being developed to treat COVID.”

Levi nods. He’s heard this as well when doing his own research, although the technical aspects of the vaccine and how it works to protect him against the virus are beyond him. Still, he trusts medical professionals more than he trusts random people on the internet swearing that vaccines are just a conspiracy theory.

“So if you were vaccinated and it was two weeks after your second dose … and you were only in the company of someone who also received their second dose two weeks ago … would you consider taking off your mask?” Levi asks. He doesn’t look at her, instead drawing circles on the floor of his balcony. He can feel the dust and grime coming off on his finger and makes a mental note to sweep and vacuum his balcony tomorrow morning.

“I’d consider it,” Petra says. When Levi looks up, Petra’s mask is shifted upward just the slightest bit and the corners of her eyes are crinkled. He wants to see her smile so much. “If the other person were okay with it, too, of course.”

“Of course,” Levi repeats, his voice a quiet murmur, and he leaves it at that because he’s afraid of asking more.

But he lets himself imagine that the vaccine will be out to the public soon and, once it is, he’ll finally have the courage to ask Petra if she’s willing to take her mask off. He lets himself imagine that she says yes. And he lets himself imagine that the first thing she does when she takes her mask off is smile.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Levi sits on the balcony with Petra at 1:58 AM. It’s the third night in a row that they’ve done this, sitting on their balconies with their masks on and the glow from their laptop screens illuminating their faces. Were Levi with anyone else, he would complain that this was an unreasonable hour to be up even if it is for the slim chance to snag a spot for a vaccine appointment, but because he’s up at this ungodly hour with Petra, Levi finds he doesn’t mind.

Technically, Levi doesn’t apply for a vaccine at this time. The rules are confusing, but he’s not supposed to schedule an appointment until certain other people have gotten their vaccines. People who are currently eligible are healthcare workers and essential workers. Petra, being a waitress in the food industry, is considered an essential worker and is thus eligible for the vaccine at this time. Is it irritating for Levi to watch other people get vaccinated before him? A little bit, but he’s glad Petra will soon get the vaccine. Unlike Petra, Levi works at home all day and is thus less likely to be exposed to the virus anyway. Even if he can’t book a vaccine appointment at this time, helping Petra book hers will help him prepare for scheduling his appointment when the time comes.

Petra yawns, using her elbow to cover her mouth even though she’s still wearing her mask. Levi feels horribly endeared watching her. She’s dressed in her pajamas — a cotton pajama set in black and white polka dot print and fuzzy cat slippers on her feet. Her hair is tied in a messy bun atop her head, stray locks of ginger falling around her face even though she wears a hairband meant to keep them away. Even as Petra continues to hit the refresh button, her eyelids droop and she looks as if she’s about to nod off to sleep soon.

“Abandoned slots tend to open up at 2 AM,” Petra murmurs to herself over and over. It’s like a mantra she keeps repeating, hoping that it’ll help her stay awake until she books herself an appointment. Levi doesn’t know how much it’s helping. “Abandoned slots tend to open up at 2 AM.”

“Should you really be staying up this late to book an appointment?” Levi asks. He hits the refresh button too, but the page remains the same. All appointments are full. “Don’t you have a morning shift tomorrow?”

Petra squints at him, concentrating as she fully registers his question. “Mmm, if I don’t get one at 2, then I’ll head right to bed.” Petra yawns again. As usual, she uses her elbow to cover her mouth. “I don’t know how people are booking their appointments so fast, but at least it seems like it’s a ‘first come, first serve’ type of thing. I heard it was worse at the hospital when they were first giving the vaccines out.”

Levi remembers hearing about it on the news and then hearing about it second-hand from Petra when she was talking about her doctor friend. There were some hospitals that determined vaccinations for their staff members by raffle, not even prioritizing doctors and nurses that were working first-hand with COVID patients. In the particular hospital that Petra’s friend worked at, COVID vaccinations were given out to higher-ranking doctors first regardless of whether or not they were working with COVID patients, which also caused a flurry of criticism from the hospital staff as well as media when the news broke out. The current system being used for front-line workers to get vaccinated certainly is inconvenient, but Levi doesn’t know what a better one would be.

“Just keep refreshing, just keep refreshing,” Petra says in a sing-song voice. She hits the refresh button robotically, but her eyelids are still drooping. Suddenly, she looks up, a little bit more awake than she was just a second ago. “Do you think my finger will fall off before I get an appointment?”

The mask hides the upward twitch of Levi’s lips. “I don’t think so,” he replies. He hits the refresh button and his eyes flicker to his screen. His eyes widen when he sees 10, 15, 20 spots open up at different pharmacies nearby. Quickly, he begins to turn his laptop around and points at the screen excitedly. “Wait, look!”

Petra takes one look at his screen and begins to tap around hers. She doesn’t even tell him that she sees them or thank him for alerting her because that would take a few extra seconds that might allow the appointments to fill up before she can claim a spot. Levi watches as Petra sits hunched over her laptop, the light from the screen allowing him to see how her brows are knit together in concentration as she types her information on the screen. She even has her insurance card ready beside her, filling in the necessary information easily. Levi doesn’t think he’s ever seen anyone type that quickly in his life, and he normally hits 100+ wpm when he’s writing code.

Suddenly, Petra hits the enter key one last time and looks up. Her typing has halted entirely and she stares at Levi with a blank expression on her face. It’s difficult to tell whether she got the appointment or if all the available slots had filled up at the last minute. It’s just an appointment, one that Petra can probably book later this week if not tomorrow, but the anticipation is making Levi’s palms sweat.

“So?” Levi asks. He’s never felt like it was hard to breathe wearing his mask, but he’s feeling a little breathless now. “Did you get one?”

A beat passes. Then two. Then three.

Suddenly, Petra raises her arms, lifts her head, and lets out a yell that’s far too loud for 2 AM in the morning. It’s so sudden that Levi flinches, but he sees that Petra’s eyes are crinkled at the edges when she faces him again. “I got it!” she proudly announces. She’s swaying as she sits. She probably used all of her energy just booking that appointment. Considering how tired and sleep-deprived Petra has been for the past three days, Levi’s surprised that she hadn’t made a typo at the last moment and missed her chance.

He’s grinning from ear to ear, not that she can see. “That’s great. Good for you. When is it?”

“Tomorrow morning,” she says. Petra shoots him with an endearing finger gun and winks. It makes his heart flutter in the oddest way. She shuts the screen of her laptop and the blue light that was illuminating her face disappears. It makes it more difficult for Levi to see the lines and creases in her mask. It also makes it a little harder for him to imagine the smile hidden beneath the fabric covering her face. “I’m going to call in sick and come in for my appointment. I don’t care what my boss says. It’s better if I get the vaccine anyway even if I might get yelled at when I come in tomorrow.”

Levi furrows his brow. “Are you going to be okay the next day? The side effects …” His voice trails off.

“It should be okay,” Petra says with yet another yawn. She should really go to sleep, but Levi doesn’t have the heart to tell her to go just yet. “The side effects aren’t really an issue until the second dose, I hear. Although, some people who had COVID said the first dose kicked their butts. Since I haven’t had COVID, it probably won’t be a problem for me.”

“But you won’t go into work if you happen to feel adverse side effects?” Levi can’t help but ask.

Petra doesn’t answer for a moment, just looks at Levi for a moment before her eyes smile again. “You’re sweet,” Petra tells him, and Levi’s flustered. For some reason, he wants to deny it, to tell her that he’s just asking what any reasonably concerned friend would ask, but Petra speaks again before he gets a chance to. “Yeah, I’ll call in another sick day if I have to. Thanks for worrying.”

Levi is about to tell her that it’s not a problem. Of course, it’s not a problem because helping her doesn’t burden him in any way, but he bites his lip instead.

Petra stretches her arms above her head. She gives him another sleep smile, one that Levi can only see in her eyes again, and waves at him tiredly. “That was kind of fun in a hectic way. Thanks for staying up with me these past few nights.”

Levi fiddles with the sleeve of his shirt. “It’s so I know what to do when it’s my turn to make an appointment,” he mumbles. He cringes when he speaks. He doesn’t sound convincing at all.

“Then we’ll do it again when it’s your turn,” Petra says. She points her index finger at him. “It’s the least I can do after you stayed up with me. I should do the same for you.”

He tells her that she doesn’t have to, but Petra insists and won’t let him go back into his apartment until he agrees. They have an undecided date for when they book Levi’s appointment. Petra, ever the optimist, says that the system will probably be less hectic by the time Levi’s eligible, but Levi’s not so sure. Still, he feels quite content as he returns to his apartment.

Petra gets her vaccine tomorrow. Levi wonders if he should construct a care package for her when she comes back and leave it at her doorstep. Not anything fancy, he thinks, just the essentials just in case side effects hit: canned chicken noodle soup, tea and honey, Gatorade, and a small bottle of Tylenol just in case. That’s probably overkill though, Levi sighs. He can think about being nice and thoughtful all he wants, but he knows he’ll back out in the end because there’s a chance that he’s overstepping his boundaries. He should just play it cool. Play it safe. Just pop out on the balcony tomorrow night and ask her how it went, if she was nervous, if her arm hurts.

It’s fine. He doesn’t need to be her caretaker. It’s good enough that they’re neighbors, two people in a short-distance relationship of six feet (or more) apart, unlikely friends in this strange time. It’s too much for him to hope to find love in this time of COVID-19. It’s enough that they’re just two people helping each other stay safe from COVID and booking appointments together. Maybe in a month or two they can be friends who are fully vaccinated against the virus. Two people who still take precautions against the infectious disease but who can live life in a little less fear because their chances of contracting the virus are lowered to about 5%. Two people who can smile at each other without their masks on.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Levi gets his vaccine two months after Petra. Like many other people, he suffered few side effects from the first dose except for a sore arm the very next day. The effects of the second dose are far worse.

He was warned by Petra, who told him that the effects of the second dose were like getting hit by the flu virus and a truck at the same time. He was also warned by various anonymous persons on the internet that were kind enough to share their vaccine experiences on online forums as well as medical professionals that posted informative online videos on YouTube. No warning could have prepared him for how bad the side effects really were.

Levi feels the effects of the second dose ten hours after he returns home from his vaccine appointment. At first, his arm just aches and he feels slightly drowsy. He doesn’t think much of it, thinking that these effects are mild compared to what other people are experiencing. After a few more hours, his body feels terribly cold and his entire body is aching. Everything irritates him more than usual: the light streaming in from his balcony hurts his eyes, the rattle of the air vent is grating to his ears, and the pounding of his head makes him want to bang his head against the wall until he passes out. To put it lightly, he feels like shit.

Petra said she only felt some muscle pain and had a slight fever for a few hours, but Levi feels like he can barely walk. The night Petra had her second dose, she only came out for a few minutes to talk to Levi before leaving to sleep early, but Levi doesn’t think he can even manage that.

Lying on the couch with a blanket draped over his body and an ice pack on his head, Levi manages to reach for his phone on the coffee table and type out a brief text message.

Levi:

Staying in tonight. See you tomorrow if I feel better.

Petra:

🙁🙁🙁

I hope it’s not too bad.

Feel better soon!

I hope you feel better tomorrow 😊

Levi wonders what she means when she says she hopes he feels better tomorrow. Does that mean she hopes he feels better so that they can see each other tomorrow? Or maybe he’s overthinking it and she’s just being polite. It’s normal to say “hope you feel better” when someone is feeling awful, isn’t it?

He doesn’t want to think about this too much. He should just rest instead of mulling about what Petra’s messages really mean. With a sigh, Levi turns his phone screen off and leaves it face-down on the table so that he’s not tempted to check his texts every time he gets a new notification.

Levi settles down against the pillows on his couch and wraps his blankets around him. He’s already taken a Tylenol, but it has only managed to dull his headache and not get rid of it completely. His limbs still feel achy, although not in the unbearable way they did an hour ago. He wonders if he should eat something. He had downed a Gatorade when he first got home and then drank another bottle a few hours ago, but he hasn’t eaten much except for a slice of bread and half an apple. It would probably be best for him to eat something else, but he doesn’t have the energy to get up off the couch and prepare something. Even a packet of ramen feels like it would be too much for him to handle at the moment.

He tosses and turns on the couch until he finds a position that he doesn’t hate. He’s not sure how he’ll be able to sleep when he feels this uncomfortable. He thinks it’ll take him at least an hour or two, but he drifts off without realizing and doesn’t wake up until he hears the ringing of his doorbell.

Groggy with sleep and muscles still aching, Levi gets up from the couch, his blankets dragging behind him as he checks the door. When he looks through the peephole, he doesn’t see anything. He’s too tired to even be angry about someone ding-dong ditching his door and he’s too feverish to even wonder why somebody would ring his doorbell only to abandon his doorstep moments later. He’s about to walk back to his couch and collapse into another dreamless sleep, but the thought that he might have accidentally called for some takeout while in his post-vaccine delirium forces him to yank open the door.

There isn’t anybody in sight nor is there a bag of takeout. Instead, there’s a basket with a note on it. Levi bends down to read the neat script printed on the paper:

Hope you feel better soon! I made some food that might help since you’re probably not in the mood to cook for yourself. 😊

-Petra

Levi stands there and blinks at the basket of food, wondering if this is all part of his fever dream. Maybe he hasn’t woken up yet. Levi is sure he’s dreamed this all up, but his body hurts too much for him to be still dreaming. He’s about to go in and text Petra to ask her if she really had left the basket of food for him, but he looks up to see the apartment door across from him cracked open and his gossipy neighbor looking at him, only her eye visible. Startled, Levi quickly grabs the basket and shuts the door behind him with a slam.

He carries the basket with him to the couch, setting it on the table. When he picks up his phone, he sees he has over a dozen messages. Most of them, unsurprisingly, are from Isabel, but when he scrolls to the bottom he sees he also has one from Petra. He taps on that one first.

Petra:

Cooking post-vaccine sucks!! I know from personal experience 😥

Left you some goodies outside your door jic you don’t feel like cooking. I hope you enjoy!

If it’s from Petra, then it’s safe to inspect the package. Levi lifts the cloth covering the top of the basket and peers inside. He pulls out a colorful tumbler first. The container is a pretty and pastel peach color that fades to white at the bottom. On the side it has a label with the same neat handwriting the first note had. “Peach smoothie,” it says with the ingredients listed in smaller print at the bottom: peaches, banana, greek yogurt, almond milk, honey, vanilla & cinnamon. When Levi looks at the other containers, he finds that they’re labeled similarly.

It’s difficult to explain how Levi feels as he sits on the couch and eats the rice porridge Petra had packed. The porridge is still warm, steam escaping from the thermos when Levi had first unscrewed the cap. Earlier, he hadn’t been in the mood to eat, but now he finds he can’t stop as he shovels spoonful after spoonful of rich, hearty porridge in his mouth.

It’s warm, Levi thinks, and he continues to eat. He no longer feels the chills that had confined him to his couch and forced Levi to wrap himself in layers and layers of blankets. He just feels warm and content, the rich broth from the rice porridge filling his belly and warming him from the inside out. There are tender chunks of chicken breast that Levi devours hungrily and tiny pieces of julienned ginger that balance the porridge out with a kick of spice and just the tiniest bit of sweetness. Levi doesn’t remember the last time he’s eaten so well.

He feels … so content as he sits back against his couch, upright for the first time in hours. He nibbles on the apple slices had cut for him, making sure to admire the little rabbit-ears she had taken the time to carve into each one. In between sips of the peach smoothie, Levi ponders.

Is it normal for neighbors to make food for their neighbors when they’re feeling ill? Is it something good acquaintances do? Is it something friends do? The last one is possible, although Levi has yet to receive a care package from Isabel or Farlan. Then again, he wasn’t planning on sending them one for their second doses, although he’s seriously considering it after experiencing the second dose side effects firsthand. It could be that his post-vaccine delirium is causing him to imagine things that aren’t there: affection, fondness … love?

Levi downs the rest of his smoothie and decides to sleep it all away.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Levi does feel better the next morning, but he doesn’t feel entirely okay either. He feels … strange. While the symptoms he suffered from previously are now gone, Levi finds himself suffering from new ones. They aren’t as uncomfortable as everything he had yesterday — fever, body ache, chills, headache, to name a few — but they make him feel anxious nonetheless. He could be one of the few cases suffering from deadly side effects after the vaccine.

Like any person without a medical degree or a friend in the medical field, Levi takes to the Internet to find answers. He looks up all the uncomfortable symptoms he’s feeling: chest pain, heart palpitations, light-headedness. When he thinks he’s found a consistent answer among various medical sites, he immediately calls Farlan over Zoom.

“I think I’m dying,” he tells Farlan immediately after his friend picks up.

Farlan furrows his brow, his blue eyes filled with concern. “You mean … you didn’t manage to get COVID right before your second dose, did you?” Farlan runs a hand through his honey-blond hair, looking around his apartment for things he needs to drive over to Levi’s house: his wallet, keys, a first aid kit. “Are you okay? I’ll drive over there really quick.”

“No, no. Not COVID,” Levi says quickly. He rubs his hand over his chest. “It’s just … I’ve been feeling strange. I’ve been getting heart palpitations. Sometimes my chest hurts and I feel lightheaded. I think I might have myocarditis.”

Farlan blinks once. Twice. He takes a deep breath and then breathes out. Calmer now, he says, “I thought we talked about you self-diagnosing yourself with different diseases. Just because you’re a hypochondriac does not mean you’re qualified to make these types of calls about your health.”

“I’m serious this time!” Levi says. “It makes sense, doesn’t it? There are other people who have taken the vaccine and have developed pericarditis and myocarditis. I’m not being paranoid.” Levi admits to being quick to diagnosing himself with diseases in the past, many of which were probably impossible for him to contract in hindsight, but he doesn’t know why Farlan is scolding him for being careful about his health.

Farlan sighs. He leans back against his chair and rubs his eyes. “Alright,” Farlan says. He sits up. He doesn’t look angry anymore, just tired. “Tell me everything in detail this time and don’t leave anything out.”

“Well, I told you,” Levi says. “Chest pain and heart palpitations and dizziness -”

“And these all started right after you received your second vaccine?” Farlan asks.

“Yeah, I …,” Levi’s voice trails off. He pauses just a moment and realizes it’s not the first time he’s experienced these symptoms. He’s felt it once or twice before, these strange pangs in his chest and his heart fluttering oddly. “It happened before. When I was with Petra.”

Farlan smirks. “Well, congratulations. It looks like you’re not sick. You’re just an idiot,” he tells Levi and then adds, “and in love.” Before Levi can deny it, Farlan hangs up.

Levi is still spluttering at his screen when a message from Farlan pops up.

Farlan:

Ask her out.

Levi stares at the message even as a million little notifications from Isabel pop up asking him why he called Farlan without her. He thinks about the message. He thinks about asking Petra. He winces when the thought of it brings an odd, sharp pain to his chest, the same one he’s been feeling all morning.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Petra smiles when she sees him that night, her eyes crinkling the way they do when she smiles and her mask shifting upwards. Levi still doesn’t know what her smile looks like, but he’s imagined it every night for weeks on end.

“Feeling better?” she asks Levi. She leans against the railing, her arms resting on top. Levi stands his railing too, but he doesn’t lean against it the way Petra does. It’s perhaps the closest they’ve gotten in all the time they’ve spoken with each other. “The second dose is really something, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Levi mumbles. He wonders if he looks terrible, if his face is pale or cheeks flushed, if there are bags under his eyes, if he looks any thinner than he was the day before. He hopes he doesn’t look too horrible.

Petra rests her head on her arms, eyes looking up at Levi. “So what are you gonna do once your two weeks are up and you have the antibodies?” she asks. “I mean, don’t go crazy and crowd surf at an unmasked concert, of course, but maybe you could go out and eat at a restaurant if they have outdoor dining or something.”

“Actually, I was thinking of staying home,” Levi says. His palms are sweating already and his heart is doing that thing where it’s beating erratically against his chest. His head is feeling strange. There’s a chance that Levi might faint and fall off his balcony where he’ll fall four stories until he hits the ground. He almost doesn’t believe it when he hears himself say, “I was actually wondering if you wanted to eat dinner at my place once my two weeks are over.”

Petra’s eyebrows are lifted in surprise. Maybe if she weren’t wearing a mask right now, Levi would see her lips shaped in a perfect O. After a moment, she asks, “Are you really asking me to have dinner with you on your first night of being fully vaccinated?” Her tone is teasing. It makes Levi blush and he almost regrets asking her until Petra says, “I’d be honored. Do you want me to bring anything? I can cook pretty well.”

“If you really want to,” Levi says. He doesn’t know how he’s still standing. A part of him feels as if he’s still on his couch in a fever-filled haze, suffering from the effects of the second vaccine. There’s no way all of this isn’t a dream. Subtly, he wraps his arm around his torso and pinches himself in the ribs. It hurts too much to be a dream.

He’s two weeks closer to seeing Petra without a mask on.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

The night of the dinner, Levi finds himself frantically running around his apartment. He took the day off work just to clean his apartment even though he cleans it at least twice daily already. This time, he’s taken the liberty of dusting off the corners of the ceiling and making sure to get all the dirt from behind the furniture. He’s even cleaned the inside of each and every cabinet, including the very top cabinets that are a bitch for him to clean.

It’s overkill, Isabel and Farlan told him. They told him to just treat it like a normal dinner, to just pretend as if they’re the ones coming over instead of Petra, but Levi can’t do that. The difference between Petra and his friends is just too vast. For one thing, he knows that Farlan and Isabel don’t mind a bit of dust, but he’s not sure the same can be said for Petra. Because is so careful in following COVID prevention guidelines, he’s sure she would appreciate the extra time he takes cleaning his apartment just for her arrival.

He couldn’t decide what to buy for dinner. He knows Petra had offered to bring some food over for tonight, but it feels rude to assume that she’ll provide a full-course meal. The problem with ordering food himself is that he doesn’t know what kind of food she likes. Mexican? Italian? Chinese? Indian? There are too many possibilities. He doesn’t know if she has any food preferences or allergies either, and he’s far too nervous to ask her. Levi doesn’t know how to cook for shit, so ordering takeout is the norm for him, but it’s different when you’re ordering for another person. In the end, he orders one dish from different restaurants hoping that at least one dish will be able to satisfy Petra.

Then there’s the question of what to wear.

“Just wear anything,” Farlan groans. He’s splayed out in his chair and looking up at the ceiling. He hasn’t looked at the past dozen outfits Levi has suggested. “Wear your all-black grunge number or a three-piece suit. I’m sure it doesn’t matter.”

“I can’t just wear anything,” Levi hisses. “What will she think of me?”

“You’ve seen each other at 2 AM with only pajamas on,” Farlan points out. He yawns, not bothering to cover his mouth. “I’m pretty sure you two know each other well enough not to mind the other person’s fashion choices.”

“You should wear those tight leather pants,” Isabel says. She leans forward in her seat, her head in her palm with her elbow resting on her knee. “With that see-through shirt. And put some hair gel in your hair. Also maybe put on some eyeliner.”

Levi blinks. “I don’t have any of those things.”

Isabel groans. “I know, your wardrobe is sooooo boring!”

He shouldn’t have asked Farlan and Isabel for their help. He ends up with a mask, a sky-blue button-down, his darkest pair of jeans, and more anxiety than he had this morning. Petra should be here any minute and he’s feeling strange again. The same symptoms as before plague him: dizziness, pains in his chest, heart palpitations. The chime of his doorbell is enough to make him jump out of his seat on the couch and almost fall on the floor.

Levi scrambles for the door, pulling it open. There Petra stands, mask on and a bag full of food she’s prepared for tonight. She looked nice more than six feet away when they were standing on their balconies, but she looks even nicer standing right in front of him. He’s about to say as much when he notices the door across from them open and his neighbor’s eye peep out from the crack. Startled, he pulls Petra in just as she’s saying hello and slams the door behind her.

He breathes a sigh of relief only for his breath to hitch in his throat when he realizes that he’s trapped Petra in between him and the door. They’re standing far closer than six feet apart. It’s closer than six inches apart. It’s even closer than six centimeters. He can count every strand of ginger hair on her head, every eyelash, every freckle sprinkled across her cheeks.

Startled, Levi stumbles backward and apologizes. “S-sorry,” he stammers. His cheeks are flushed red with embarrassment, the heat made worse with his mask on. “The woman in the apartment across from me was staring.”

“Oh, yeah,” Petra says. She looks behind her, although there’s no way for her to see the neighbor now that Levi’s door is closed. When she turns back, her eyes are crinkled. “She talks a lot, that one.”

“Yeah,” Levi mumbles. He stares at Petra. He can’t help it. There’s a smile hidden behind her mask. He can see it if he only asks. He’s closer to seeing it than he’s ever been. Soon, he’ll know what lies beneath. Cautiously, carefully, Levi asks, “Would you like to take off your mask?”

“Sure,” Petra says. She unhooks the elastics from her ears. She removes the mask from her face, looks at Levi, and smiles.

It’s more beautiful than Levi could have imagined: a dimple in her cheek, freckles sprinkled across her skin that her mask had always covered until today, and just the slightest overbite in her smile. It makes Levi’s heart do a weird flip in his chest, worse than he’s ever felt before. His palms are sweating and he’s feeling light-headed. He’s not sure he’s even breathing.

Breathlessly, Levi tears off his mask. “Can I kiss you?” The question falls from his mouth without him thinking. He’s about to take it back and apologize for being too forward, but Petra takes a step closer to him.

Her smile is dazzling, growing wider as Petra takes a step. Her eyes crinkle the way they always did on the balcony. “Sure,” she says and reaches to place one hand on the back of Levi’s neck before pulling him in for a kiss.

It’s perfect.

[teamfreewill2pointo]

Transcript of End of the Road Special

Transcript of End of the Road Special. 

Please let me know if I made any errors in transcription. Twitter version Family Don’t End with Blood Transcription Winchester Mythology Transcription

Dabb: Ultimately, we came up with something that we're all very proud of Singer: You never know what the audience is going to like so we really tried to say "what would make us happy? Would we be satisfied with where we've taken them?"

The Carry On song was a guideline.

Singer: The myth of what these brothers were throughout 15 years... We didn't shy away from fatalism, but we wanted to be able to have it be kinda uplifting as well.

Dabb: If you're going to do something that feels like a complete arc, you have to kinda go back to the beginning of it (clips of them hunting vamps from s1 & 15.20) When it comes to Sam & Dean- it's all about getting back to, in some ways, these two guys on the road in this car.

Dabb: They've been doing this job for 15 years now. They've fought everyone from demons to vampires to God himself, but at the end of the day, they're still working guys, out there on the road & taking cases. We've tried to never lose sight of that.

Dabb: There are times when we've been wrapped up in our own mythology a little bit. We've always tried to get back to the basics, which are: these two guys, saving people, hunting things. 

Eugenie: I think we sort of knew generally what the ending would involve.

Eugenie: We might not have known the mechanics, but we sort of knew there would be a victorious, glorious sacrificial ending bc I think sacrifice is a big theme in the series.

For every great thing you do, a cost must be paid.

Singer: Andrew & I talked about it. We were in agreement pretty quickly... talked to the rest of the writing staff & let them know what we wanted to do and we were open to suggestions. And then we pretty much pitched it to Jared and Jensen.

Jensen talks about flying to LA. Jensen: So before we ever even started 15, we knew how the last portion of the story was going to go. We didn't know how we were going to get there, but we kinda knew the final- the finish line- we knew what... what that was going to look like.

Jared: I don't think there's ever been a season of SPN in 15 years where the way the writers thought the show would play out for that season- ended up being the way it played out And so we were aware of that. They told us here's what we're thinking, here's what happens to Castiel

Jared: In the finale, Dean dies & Sam lives on. And then we think they're going to meet up in heaven. 

I remember Jensen... just because I know him so well- he seemed to bristle a little bit.

Jensen: It was hard to hear then & it was hard to read now. Not because I didn't like it, not because I wished it had gone differently... I'm not adverse to it. I think it's a great ending. I'm proud to film it.

Singer: And we just aimed for that, you know, throughout the season. We knew where we were going.

Jensen: Reading it & knowing that... there's just a weight that is so much larger reading these scripts than I've ever experienced before. 

There's an emotional weight that these scripts are going to carry & these episodes are going to have that I don't think we've ever seen before.

Brad: [J2] were so young when all of this started. They brought to it such conviction & such commitment to the effort. 

That's one of the things that kept the show going for so many years... a show that was designed for very young guys, footloose & fancy free, & on the road…

Brad: To see these guys grow up b4 your eyes into- men, not boys any longer- was amazing. 

BABY Jared: Though the story does involve Sam & Dean chasing supernatural things, it really is a story about two brothers that love each other & ultimately will do anything for each other.

Jensen: There's really one person that gets it on the level that I get it, and that's Jared. Jared: I've never spent as much time with another human being as I have with Jensen Ackles. He will be my friend and brother forever. And I know that.

BABY Jensen: There's a lot of dynamics between the two brothers, there's a lot of history between them, there's a lot of banter between them... it's good stuff S15 Jensen: We had a partner in crime & we leaned on each other for, you know, for times when it was tough.

Jensen: But we also won together. We got to share the experience of success & the experience of getting picked up for another season. Watching these two characters go through what they're going through, when we're working 14 hours & it's 2-3 o’clock on a Sat morning and we're just now finishing filming out in the rain and mud and we gotta race to the airport to get on a plane because we've got a photoshoot in LA & we've gotta do on camera interviews and we gotta promote the show that we love so much that we were just in the mud & the rain filming hours before we're exhausted and it's like there's only one person that gets that right now. That gets how I feel and that's this guy standing next to me. That's pretty cool. That's pretty cool to have somebody like that.

Brad: We knew it was going to be impossible to tie up every aspect of all of the cans of worms that we opened up. 

We did want to bring a proper ending to the guys, the guy's relationship.

Brad: Then of course we had this huge corner we painted ourselves into with the most powerful thing in the universe being the big bad of the season. We try and find a proper send off for Jack & for Cas. What to do w/ the boys & is that a together farewell or an individual?

It was just... lots of moving parts. 

Dabb: I give a lot of credit to Bobo who really was the one who started banging the drum early & often to ending the mythology in 19 and end the characters in 20.

Brad: You're battling God & battling God & you have this epic situation going on through the first 3/4 of the show & then what? You send off Dean in act 4? That just felt wrong. Eugenie: We had this obligation, it was really mandatory, that we tie up the mythic narrative and leave the final episode for the emotional resolution. I [was] more on the side of not wanting to best God. To have God change to be more like his creations. So there were philosophical arguments, but we always knew God's resolution was going to be a big ticket item.

Jensen: We'd started day 1 of the 2nd to last episode, 19. We were 1 day down on that episode & we were just about to start our 2nd day & we got the call that morning that we were not going to be coming in that day.

Jensen: So we figured ok, we'll figure out protocol, figure out what we need to do, & we'll just regroup, come back on Monday. As that day progressed, it was like- this looks like more of an apocalypse that is ascending upon us than just a bad cold.

They pulled the plug & they said everybody go home. 

Singer: Fortunately, we got assurance from both the studio & the network that one way or another we were gonna finish the series. That was comforting to us, but we didn't know when we were going to go back.

Eugenie: We didn't know what we were going back to... if this was the last time we would ever see the set. There was no plan. It was just get out of dodge. Dabb: When it first happened, we thought it would be a couple of weeks, maybe a month.

I had conversations w/WB where they expected everyone to be back shooting in June & then things got worse & pushed & pushed.

Eugenie: Slowly as we settled into that 4 or 5 month period, discussions were going on w/the studio, & the networks, & the actors. We knew there would be restrictions on what we were allowed to shoot, but finally, the mechanics were figured out. 

Singer: So they were ready to go pretty quickly, shooting in Van, where covid wasn't quite as virulent as it was [in LA].

Dabb: We were one of the first shows, one of the first WB shows to start back up. So in a way, we were kinda a guinea pig. But, in being that, I think everyone took it really seriously. We had 0 positive tests. Crew members weren't going out on the weekends.

They were like look, if I get sick, it hurts the whole show. That speaks to the family culture up there, where we've had so much of our crew for so long. Where J2 & Singer provide such great leadership.

Singer: When I was in prep for 20, I was basically in the office but couldn't go to the set. It was very odd for me not to be able to go to the set while I was in prep. 

Everybody just hung in there & did what they were supposed to do.

Brad: Then we were faced with the dilemma of having to rewrite a lot of the stuff bc of the pandemic bc of the limitations that we knew were going to come on the production.

Jensen: We were gearing up for, not only the end of that season, but the end of the series. There was a lot of big, big things written-packed- into those last two scripts.

Jared: At first, it was supposed to be a lot of our old cast from prior seasons in a Roadhouse with Kansas.

Everybody had already agreed. Kansas was going to be in Van. We were going to have dad there & mom there. Just probably 20 or 30 different actors & actresses who had been a part of the SPN's canon over the last 15 & a half years.

Jensen: It was scheduled to be the last day that we were going to film, so it was almost like rolling right into a nice wrap party on camera. 

Brad: The idea of flying a boatload of ppl up there to quarantine for 2 weeks so they could shoot for a day was making less & less sense.

Eugenie: How do we make this work? And while you're doing that, you also don't want to sacrifice the heart and soul of the project. 

So we came up with a reduced, much more intimate ending. It has been replaced by something equally magical & rewarding.

Singer: I felt an enormous responsibility in directing the finale of a show that's been on for 15 years. Andrew, when he saw the cut, he said some really nice things to me as to, you know, the way I handled the material.

Jensen: The scenes that were filmed on our last day on the sound stages were filled with the most emotion of the final episode. 

Singer: One of the really hard things was we're on another stage that wasn't the MoL stage & they started wrecking the MoL sets

They'd been working on this set and been apart of this- this family for just as long if not longer than the set's been around. I was like "it's really sad seeing this get taken down" and the other guy said, "I'm trying to hold back tears while I'm swinging this hammer."

Jared: As we start saying goodbye to characters, to locations, like it just seems like every day you would wake up and there would be some reason to cry. 

Misha: This is a show ultimately about love, & empathy, & caring, & I think that Castiel embodies that.

Misha: Half the crew was crying. It was really such a sweet, supporting environment to be in for the demise of a character that, of course, for me is really important. 

But it was so lovely to see that, you know, the folks that I'm- I'm working with were also there for Cas at that moment. 

Alex: To get to work with these caliber people & see your friends every day is really special & is not something that often happens in this business for this long. It's been definitely a topsy turvy last couple weeks here with us and the crew. 

Jared: Friday of the final full week was the big scene in the barn with the vampires where Dean suffers his fate. They did the first two days with the entire stunt team & the young boy actors. 

And then they cut it for Thursday night and they're like, okay, Friday, tomorrow, we’re starting the dialogue. Dean, you're on the post. Sam, you just cut off the last vampire's head.

That was the scene- that was where Supernatural was really encapsulated. 

Jensen: And then the next week we kind of had this- on the road encore get together filmmaking scenario that felt more like we made it & it was more pats on the back as opposed to tearful goodbyes. 

Dabb: In a weird way you can look at the 15 seasons is like Sam & Dean's emotional evolution. You know instead of therapy, they kill vampires, but other than that it's kind of the same & brings them both to a very good place. And a place where they can, as the song says, you know, lay their weary head to rest. 

This felt like the most honest & emotionally fulfilling episode for these characters to us. Jared: I got thinking about how Supernatural started & how the majority of times how I thought it should end. It started with Sam & Dean Winchester. I think it's proper that it ended with Sam & Dean Winchester together again. 

Jensen: When the cameras stop rolling & Bob yelled, “Cut!” and Bob yelled, “That’s a series wrap on Supernatural.” There was- a there was a loud cheer that echoed through that canyon we were filming in. I will- I will happily say that there were hugs that happened and that needed to happen. Those are people that I spent not just years with, but so much time with- it's like brothers in arms and so to put it to bed the way that we did felt really good and then felt good to hug some people, I'll tell you that much. Singer: I thanked everyone, but I wanted to really thank people who had been with us from the beginning and as I looked around, there were so many people who had been there from the beginning.

We really were a family. I always say about this show is one of the reasons that it was a success and is that it was not only about the Winchester family, but it was about the Supernatural family. 

Jared: So now that's all said and done, I guess I can look back at it and just be proud that I helped this show carry on and I'm really proud of the blood, sweat, and tears that I put in, and I feel like- I feel like that sacrifice was also maybe one of the things I learned from Sam, you know? Sam had to sacrifice a lot. So, I'm honored and flattered and grateful that I got to be a part of that journey.

Dabb: You're never going to have another show like this. You're never gonna have another experience like this. For a lot of different reasons, from how long it ran, from the family that the show became, from the amazing fans that we have. [Footage of us] From the emotional investment people can put in over 15 years of their lives. 

Some started watching this when they were in high school, when they were 15, they're 30 now, they might have kids. That's their- that's like half their life. They've been with this show. You're not gonna have that again. Shows just aren’t gonna run this long, especially genre shows, but I don't know that I'm ever gonna do anything else in my career that I'm gonna be more proud of than having been involved in this show. 

Jared: The things that stick out are just how important it is to keep putting one foot in front of the other. And keep on working and wake up every day and treat it like it could be your last and- and if you make it out the other side, you'll be happy and proud of what you did. 

Jensen: The crew had packed up, they had cleared the bridge, and they were all starting to, you know, load their trucks and get moving. And Jared and I just kind of hung back, and we just took a moment. I looked at him and I said, “I’m proud of us, man. I'm proud of what we've done.”

We know that that's the collective we, that is everyone that is involved, that is- you know from the top down. You know, for our portion, for what we contributed to this monster of the show, he and I reflected on that, and still able to see and smell the roses.