#i do get significantly worse every time i move

[s0fter-sin]

god gives his biggest bleached buzzcut dreams to his most sensitive scalped soldiers

[foldingfittedsheets]

I am a little creature largely made up of anxieties. There have been times in my life when it was worse. It’s currently significantly better. This story takes place at a time when it was pretty bad.

Food was a prison for me. I moved out early with very little idea of how to feed or care for myself. Every meal was a question mark. For three years I had Brendan doing most of the cooking but when things ended between us I moved in with some other friends. I suddenly had no way to feed myself again.

I was working at the sex shop and living with all my coworkers; a premise that would make sitcom writers weep. In that house, at the age of 24, I learned how to fry an egg. It was the only thing I knew how to do but by god, I mastered egg frying. I was so proud. I could now have one stress free meal a day of an egg on toast.

The problem was my roommates. Living with three other people is already tough but messes pile up alarmingly fast, especially in the kitchen. No one sees the whole mess as their responsibility but the one person who’s responsibility it absolutely wasn’t was mine, as I only ever cooked eggs. Glaciers moved quicker than the dishes got done, mountains of greasy unwashed dish ware were fixtures across the counters.

My friends occasionally cooked for me and each time I happily cleaned all the resulting dishes. This seemed fair.

But on my own I only used three implements for my egg. When I finished with my spatula, pan, and plate, I carefully washed them and set them to dry. Every time I came back to the kitchen there was nothing clean.

Crusted on ketchup, dried food, and unsavory residues plagued everything I needed to touch. So I ended up doing all the dishes twice, once to use my three implements and again once I was done.

I started to realize I’d come home, see the filthy pile of dishes, then go to bed without eating because I didn’t have the energy to wash it all. So I finally addressed my roommates about it. Please, I beseeched them, can these three things always be clean. I cannot function like this, and eating is already hard for me.

The answer returned: no. My request was deemed unreasonable and a counteroffer was made to turn off the small space heater I ran in my room in exchange for them magnanimously cleaning up after themselves. I declined, as my bones ached with cold everywhere except my room since no one else wanted the heat on. The impasse continued. I went to be hungry.

I noodled on it. I schemed. I plotted. And on my day off I went to a thrift shop and acquired a nice little pan and spatula. I squirreled them away into my closet. The plan was just to wash and dry it after meals and keep it in my room.

This is not how it went down. On day one of my pan coming home one of my roommates popped into my room to chat, glanced into my three quarters shut closet and immediately said, “What is that?”

I sighed and admitted my plan. All three roommates roundly condemned my plan as extremely passive aggressive. I tried once again to explain that I wasn’t eating, but my secret pan was now a source of contention, a precious resource held back from the collective.

Their discontent reached a fever pitch and I finally declared, “Fine! I will put my pan in the kitchen. On one condition. If I ever find this pan dirty, ever, I will scrape whatever is left on it into your bedding. I swear to god, if I ever come home to it being dirty there will be a reckoning.”

Terms were agreed.

The first month or two went okay. On the third month I awoke to eat breakfast and found my precious pan sullied. I grabbed it and marched upstairs. Betty was named as the culprit. I strode into Betty’s room and stood over her sleeping form like the vengeful ghost of dishes past.

“If you don’t get up and clean this right now I’m going to dump it on your bed.”

Betty groggily regarded me. “Seriously?”

“I have never been more serious.”

“It’s one time, can’t you just clean it yourself?”

“No. You promised.”

With much huffing and grousing Betty arose from bed and tromped downstairs, hastily cleaning my pan while I watched. “Happy?” She demanded.

I was. I made my egg, cheerfully cleaning the pan afterward, leaving it to dry.

[i-am-lifeform24]

Curated Companions: Part 2

--------------🔞Masterlist🔞Part 1🔞Part 3🔞Part 4🔞---------------

---------[ IVE Wonyoung - @okaylikesmomo ]----------

Were clocks always this loud? Every tick, every tock, each one reverberating against your eardrums. The cacophony of time passing did nothing to help make it pass quicker - every second felt like a minute. Did hotel rooms typically have analog clocks? Was that a perk of being placed into a more boujee room? This evening was going to be filled with many firsts.

It didn’t matter. What did matter was that your palms were getting clammy. That needed to be addressed - you wouldn’t want this girl thinking you were nervous. Would she even notice? Do girls offering this service care if you’re nervous? Unfortunately for you, the glass of water you just spilled while reaching for some tissues would probably be a dead giveaway.

“Fuck,” you whispered under your breath, quickly reaching for some more tissues to wipe the mess.

As if things couldn’t get worse, the sound of knuckles on wood filled the room. After wiping as much of the water as you could from the coffee table, you rushed over to the door. The ticking and tocking that was bothering you just a moment ago was inaudible now over the thump of your heart slamming into your chest.

“H-Hello,” you answered the door, hating yourself for stumbling over a single word.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Wonyoung,” the goddess of a woman introduced herself while holding out her hand. Her voice was dripping with this unexplainable air of quality. She smiled warmly at you as you shook her hand, so much more beautiful in person. The pictures absolutely did not do her justice. “May I come in?”

“Oh right, of course, yeah, come in!” you stammered, stepping aside for her after you realized that handshake went on for far too long to be considered socially acceptable.

The two of you walked over to the couch where Wonyoung took off her coat and placed it next to her purse on the side. You sat down next to her, unable to stop staring at her beautiful body - every inch of her was perfect. Then, as she stared at you with an expectant smile, you realized you never even introduced yourself.

“I’m so sorry, I completely forgot, I’m-”

“Relax,” she hushed you with that same voice of allurement. The beautiful girl leaned forward, giving you a peek down her top which you absolutely could not avoid, and picked up the glass you spilled earlier off the floor. “It’s completely natural to be nervous, is it your first time using a service like this?”

“It is,” you answered after taking a deep breath. “Sorry.”

“No more apologizing,” she whispered, moving closer to you on the couch. “I’m here for you, to make you feel good, to fulfill your desires.”

She was good at this. In just moments she calmed you down significantly. However, just as your heartbeat began to ease, it spiked again at her next words.

“You’re allowed to touch them if you’d like.”

Was your staring that obvious? Before you could think about it, the answer shot through you as her hand grabbed yours gently and guided it towards her chest. You gave her an instinctual little squeeze, relishing in the softness of her chest.

“We can go as fast or as slow as you want,” she continued while unbuttoning her top, letting her cleavage peek out just slightly. “You get to decide,” she added, putting one hand on your thigh and gently rubbing up and down.

The invitation to take her top off was right there for the taking, but you didn’t have the courage - not yet at least.

“Do you want to talk about what you want to do?” she asked innocently. “Tell me what does it for you, we can do anything.”

“I…” you hesitated again.

She simply giggled before sticking her chest out, nonverbally begging for you to open her top. Finally, you found the conviction to reach forward with both hands, freeing her tits from the fabric. The act alone awoke something in you - a clear reminder that this girl was here for you to do anything you wanted.

“There we go,” she whispered as both your hands began squeezing her chest. “Can I touch you?”

A nod was all you could muster as you fixated on her tits, and that was all she needed. Within seconds she had unbuttoned your pants and freed your already stiff shaft.

“So, want to tell me what you’re going to do to me tonight?” she asked again as her hand gently stroked your cock, lacking the innocent tone from before.

“I want to… cum on your tits… and in your mouth…” you answered breathily, overwhelmed by how soft her hand was. “I want to fuck you, I want to hear you moan.”

“There we go,” she smiled warmly, picking up the pace of her hand. “Keep going, where are you fucking me, tell me how you’re fucking me.”

“Anywhere,” you gasped as she sped up again. “I’m going to fuck you hard, right before I cum on that pretty face.”

“Is that what you want? You want to cover my pretty face?” she moaned, leaning even closer to you.

“I want to kiss your pretty face.”

“What’s stopping you?” she whispered, holding her lips out right in front of your mouth, stroking you as hard and fast as she physically could.

Your mind was going hazy as your cock was burning in warm sensation. Without hesitation you pushed your lips against hers, closing your eyes and letting your other senses take over. You kissed her tenderly for only a few seconds before gasping and leaning back as you felt your cock ready to explode.

“Fuck,” you gasped as your cock abruptly began shooting ropes onto Wonyoung’s slender fingers.

She slowed down the stroking, smiling brighter than ever proud that she made you bust so quickly. “It’s going to be a very long night,” she giggled, squeezing the last few drops of cum out of your shaft.

-----[ Le Sserafim Chaewon - @gangplanksorenji ]----

“Why were you even here?”

The silence was loud, ringing in your ear as her black orbs darted towards you, demanding an answer. You know eliciting something that can fulfill her is utter stupidity, because it was clearly something that shouldn’t end like that—

“Because I did so—and you’re still keeping that scar, huh?” And so you answer.

She grits her teeth as her eyes fire with annoyance, visibly frustrated with what you said on the latter, then clearly becoming apathetic towards you. “I hope to god you would never do this again—”

Catching her off-guard, you grab her right wrist, pulling her petite figure towards you without a sweat, making her lock her eyes and steam her anger out and you smile mischievously. “I don’t appreciate your tone, Ms. Kim Chae-won.”

You clearly don’t, and this isn’t part of a deal you knew with her. She knows it herself yet she chose to be a selfish hypocrite—well, in your own, observatory words. 

“And I don’t appreciate—”

You grip her wrists tighter, making her wince in a hint of pain, further igniting that fire in her. “Try me.”

You stare straight to her soul, and she couldn’t afford to do the same for god knows why as her eyes darted towards your body. Her antics bore you, but you like the fact that it’s something that fulfills your own wants, writing up the history books. “Fucking want me?”

You’re smug and hubristic, knowing that if she lied to you, she’d just be eating up the words and shattering her ego. She hates your current demeanor but she can’t lie, and she wouldn’t dare to as your hotness permeates the air between the both of you. “I wouldn’t deny it, honestly…”

Maybe this was a little too fast, but there’s no time to waste as spun her, her back flat against the concrete wall and eyeing every inch of her body. “You never fail to impress me, Chaewon.”

“Of course I always do, now…” She has her eyes on the prize, within her hands reach as she pulls your denim jacket, dangerously close to her. “You gotta give me what I want—”

Well, not anything goes on her way and you’re tired of it, and at this moment, it just fits so well that she’s not the one in authority. Your hands stop her as she advances towards your lower abdomen, knowing that this is out of bounds on what she should have been. “I’m sorry but this is out of what you’re capable to—” You pinned her harder against the wall, smelling her floral scent and latching your lips onto the scrumptious, porcelain skin of her neck, the muttered, “—I’m the one does the talking—you obey.”

Like casting a spell on her, Chaewon’s iron walls collapse, giving in as she moans almost inaudibly, hitching a breath and fighting the urge of gratification she’s feeling. “You don’t need to suppress it, Chaewon—I know you wanted them since the last time we met—”

“God, don’t you ever s-shut—oh—up? But fuck—” Even her own hubristic self shatters periodically, as she gives in with her desperations and frustrations of being deprived for who know how long. “—y-your lips, they’re good.”

As she finds satisfaction with your actions, is your answer to further tease and deprive her since you’re under control. You didn’t care if she’s even enjoying it because as selfish as this sounds, you’ll make it stay that way because you paint your own series of events—she knows every action is within your accord, and as much as she hates it, she wouldn’t dare and complain. “Of course they always do, but now...” You pull away your lips from the porcelain skin of her neck and collarbones as you stare at her intimidatingly, letting your demeanor puzzle her and the commanding prowess be the one to start the long-anticipated show.

“You better get that thing inside me later.”

“You’re ambitious, Chaewon.” With her petite frame, it wasn’t a challenge to grab her and pull her towards you, then, your lips muttered against her ear, “On your knees first.”

After you finish the sentence, you can just see her smirk, confidence evident within her as she scoffs, knowing how you’re in the scope of her field of expertise. “You’re daring, huh? You’ll get lost to the point you’ll think it’s my tight cunt.”

You squint your eyes ephemerally, hesitant with her words since you reflect your beliefs on such a famous saying. “We’ll see what those slutty lips have to offer.”

If it means to test her limits, then so be it…

------------[ ALICE Sohee - @sparklingblu ]-------------

The night is silent except for the steady click click resonating around the room as your finger travels from one key to another.  

Your eyes sting from being exposed to the bright screen of the laptop for two hours straight. Somewhere far away, a clock tower chimes. It's already 1 am. 

You misclick a key and bite back another curse to your boss. For Christ's sake, it's Christmas eve and you are stuck in your hotel room with a report that must be finished by morning. You chug down the third cup of coffee, throwing your head back. Even with your eyes closed, there's no rest. Colorful spots dance across your vision from the long exposure to the laptop screen. You are starting to doze off when a loud knock interrupts your peaceful slumber. 

Who could it be at this time of the night? You don’t remember ordering any room service. Maybe you are starting to hear things because of your deprivation of sleep. You are going to leave it at that and go back to your drowsy sleep when the sound appears once more, this time louder. 

Grunting, you walk to the door groggily and swing it open, not even bothering to check the peephole. If this is a robbery, you can’t care less. Even better if they take the laptop so you can make up an excuse and get some well-deserved rest. It’s not a robbery, unfortunately. Or is it? 

On the other side of the door stands the woman of your dreams and you mean it quite literally. Sohee, your obsession, gives you a sly smile as if she knows how crazy you are about her. It doesn’t matter because the boner that’s slowly growing in your pants after seeing her perfect figure in that black one piece dress has already given you away. 

“Can I come in?” She doesn’t need to ask, you have already move aside to make room. 

You close the door and turn, only to get your eyes blessed with the view of Sohee’s fat ass that millions of people fantasize about going to town on. If her clothed ass already gets your blood rushing you wonder what will happen if you see it bare. 

Sohee meets your gaze, shifting her body to turns towards you. “The money first”  

You have no idea what she’s talking about but in the presence of Sohee, your own will crumbles and before you know it, you are handing her every cash in your wallet. Sohee sets the money on the bedside table before closing the distance between two of you. 

Her fingers move to your underside, unbuttoning your jeans until it’s pulled down all the way and you are standing in your boxer. She kneels, taking a moment to admire your bulge before pulling the piece of fabric down. Your rock hard cock springs up instantly and she wraps her slender fingers around the base, giving it a single pump. That simple movement already have you yearning for more and Sohee obliges by wrapping her soft lips around your tip while keeping both of her hands busy by stroking the unattended parts. Her tongue flicks over your leaking slit and you let out a moan, then another, then a couple more. Sohee continues her masterclass, her head bobbing in harmony with each stroke of her hands and each movement extracts a thought that’s not about her lips, her tongue or her fingers. Sohee speeds up her movement, now twisting her fingers each time the warmth of her oral hole engulfs your shaft. The whole act is messy, sloppy and most importantly, addictive. If she goes a minute more, you are going to blow your load down her throat and you quickly order her to stop before you can enjoy the main course. 

Sohee releases your shaft, now glistening with her saliva, and wipes her mouth. “Need something else?” she asks. 

“I need to see that fat ass of yours” you demand and Sohee lips curve into a smile. 

“Of course, dear. Anything you want” 

Sohee gets on the bed on all fours, wriggling her ass. “Don’t keep a lady waiting” 

And you don’t plan to because you are already pulling up the black fabric covering your way to nirvana desperately. The dress knots into a tangle around her waist and you spank each of her now exposed cheeks. Sohee lets out a yelp which soon turns into a moan. 

 “Gonna pound that phat ass of yours Sohee. Gonna breed you” You mutter like a madman before you thrust into her glistening folds. Surprisingly, the entrance is smooth and your whole length glides in easily. “Fuck” Sohee curses and you take it at a signal to start bucking your hips. There’s no need to start out slow, she’s already so wet that the rapid thrusts come out naturally. 

“Fuck fuck just like that. Pound my huge ass” Sohee begs and you smack those baby making hips of hers some more, marking it red. Her ass jiggles with each thrust; a view panoramic than any you have seen before. Her walls clench and squeezes, threatening to milk you dry and you are barely holding on the will not to end the experience early. But it’s getting increasingly difficult with how tight she’s getting each time you enter, gripping you like a snare until- 

“Fuck” You are emptying your balls into her deepest depths, the tightness still unyielding. Sohee’s back curves gracefully as she feels your fertile seed paint her walls white. You empty your last few drops with shallow thrust and pulls out of Sohee’s worn out pussy. A steady stream of white drips down to the bedsheets and Sohee pants, her body trembling. 

But you are not done yet, you are advancing to make use of her unused hole when- 

The whole world turns upside down and an empty glass, a half-finished report and the rays of sunlight greet your sight. 

“Oh shit” 

-----------[ Everglow E:U - @smuttysabina ]-------------

It wasn't about the money, really, it wasn't. EU was not serving as a cheap whore in a deserted playground for some noble goal of funding a comeback, or because her greed was greater than her morals; no, EU was spreading her legs for a few thousand won because she was an unrepentant pervert. Nothing aroused her more than have her nubile body used to satisfy the depraved lusts of whichever degenerate so happened to be walking by, there was little she would refuse to do. EU was as perfectly happy cleaning her filthy ass-juices off some preening socialite's cock, as she was getting squished by some fat slob as he pumps her pussy full of his goopy seed; so long as she was getting fucked, she didn't care. She had tried simply being free-use, but unless she ensconced herself in a gloryhole, men were too wary to accept free sex from a beautiful girl like her; even if they had no idea she was an idol. So now EU plays the pampered girl desperate for money, getting bent over in back alleys by the dregs of society, her petite body violated in every way imaginable until dawn, her well-trained holes defiled with rancid semen. On more than a few occasions her sordid gangbangs have lasted days, as she happily services every smelly cock in the area until all of them have been utterly drained by this perverse pixie. And the best part was, none of them knew that in a few hours she would be prancing on stage in front of thousands of adoring fans, her holes still clogged with turgid jizz; well, perhaps not none of her "clients"...

Like any man, your brain was hardwired to breed any available woman, so when you heard rumors of a gorgeous girl offering sex for a pittance in the old abandoned playground, you had hurried on over without delay. And it was a good thing that you had, since there was already quite the line by the time you arrived, with seemingly every gormless virgin and portly husband on the block gathered for this. With such a crowd, it took some time before your destination was revealed, and imagine your shock when you realized that the cheap escort you had come to fuck was none other than your beloved EU! She was your favorite, you had spend endless hours watching her fancams, she had disturbed your dreams for years now, and you had spent yourself for her more often than you could count. So to see EU now being spitroasted by sweaty men was nearly enough to make you pass out; you had imagined sex with her in many different ways, but never like this... You are forced to watch then, as your favorite idol is manhandled and used like a disposable fleshlight, your heart sinking further as every fresh degenerate takes their turn and mounts her tiny body. Depression grips as you trudge forward, watching EU getting every hole filled at the same time, watching her gorging upon buttery semen, watching her take the greasiest fat cocks and the tinniest members without distinction, watching her exclusive pussy getting polluted by inferior seed.

Tears are falling down your face by the time you reach EU, filled with despair from seeing your adorable bias being merrily violated by dirty scum; you had never been harder in your entire life. The idol notices that you recognize her, and can tell from your appearance what toxic stew of emotions must be roiling inside of your chest. With a serene smile EU undoes your pants, allowing your staggering erection to grace the air, before a nasty grin slashes across her cherub-like face; and she spreads her stained legs in welcome for you. Gazing upon her used pussy and soggy anus, you realize that you no longer cared that your favorite idol was a depraved pervert, because you had realized, you were one too. EU groans with delight as you join her in the filth from her previous couplings, as you fulfill your wildest dreams and fuck your perverse bias until your balls have been emptied.

EU relishes every moment of your corruption, after all, she wasn't doing this for the money, she was doing it to turn her fans into degenerate perverts to slake her own depraved lusts. And if she so happens to spend her hard-earned cash on a burger during the subway ride home, why, that was merely a happy coincidence...

-------[ BLACKPINK Rose - @passingnotions ]---------

“So these would be the terms and the amount of money and all that—” 

A message bubble appears next to her camera feed. Rosé resumes packing.

“This is triple my rate,” you state, unbelieving.

“Your profile reads exclusive.” Rosé approaches her phone again and takes up most of your screen. A lollipop rounds her cheek. “I’d like to ensure that.” 

“The regular amount is fine.” You scroll. It’s terms that read everything privacy and non-disclosure—the usual, though the wording seems overly eloquent. “You get a lawyer to draft this?”

“Duh.” She slides the bright red sweet over her tongue while gauging your reaction to the document. The thought of her needing to pay you for all this seems a little superfluous when the camera’s aimed at the back of her throat like that. “Your higher-ups do the same.”

“Right, but that’s a company.” You reach the very end, save a copy to sign and send back. “This is freelance.”

“I’m worth more than your company. Got more to lose.” She gets back to tackling her closet.

So, sure, Rosé as your independent, temporary employer and client: no corporate middleman; triple the usual; a week’s worth of your face between her legs—plus a finger or three—and making her ride the mattress springs with your cock pistoning inside her wet, sloppy cunt, ankles dangerously hooked up and over your shoulders where the angle feels like it might kill you both and then some, all before having that familiar throat wring you dry in some abroad, high-end hotel suite. Any other client and you wouldn’t even entertain the idea (read: glaring red flags). Rosé, however, is a regular—

“Hold on. What does it mean I can’t leave the room?”

Her voice is barely audible from where she stands off-screen. “You know how many people will surround the hotel just to get a picture of me or any other celebrity? Staff like their gossip and their coin. No, you can’t leave the room.”

You laugh. “I’m getting paid to get kidnapped.”

“Could tie you up, too.”

Virtual ink scribbles your signature on the dotted line and you mail back the file. “You only get the wrists.”

“I know,” she says, tossing a cluster of outfits into the carry-on. 

You hear the brittle lollipop crunch when Rosé approaches the camera again—pretty navel framed by a blue baby tee above, gray sweatpants below. There’s an abrupt shake to the image as she grabs the phone and throws herself onto her queen-size. Subtle waves of blonde fan over the pillow, the mess of clothes. She bites that last bit of candy and discards the stick on her nightstand. 

“You get the email?” You ask.

“Yeah.” A lull. You would’ve ended the call a minute or two earlier, after getting the details in order, but Rosé is not someone you hang up on. And that’s not simply due to contractual obligations. “Any client I should be getting jealous of tonight?”

“It’s against company policy for me to tell you this, but you might be getting too attached.”

“No therapy addons for tonight, please.”

“Just the extra time?” You smile.

She sits up to rest against the headboard. “So you aren’t seeing anyone tonight then.” 

“I do have to get up earlier than usual tomorrow—”

Your phone vibrates and an hour’s worth of pay displays on the banner. It’s superfluous, really, with the way that tight top begins to peel off her figure.

“Just the extra time.”

----------[ ITZY Chaeryeong - @chunksworld]----------

“My name is Serena and you will follow my rules tonight, do I make myself clear?”

It’s wrong. Everything about it is wrong. You have a loving girlfriend that you go home to every night and you wouldn’t want to have it any other way. You just had an argument with her, that is all—something about how you don’t take her out on dates anymore and that even worse, you don’t love her anymore. You vehemently denied her allegations, so why in the world did you decide to take up your friend’s offer to hire an escort? 

Maybe she is right, maybe you are starting to lose feelings for her. Well it does not matter because you already clearly knew the answer when you specifically requested that the escort make you “forget everything” for tonight. I mean, what faithful boyfriend would do that? And why are you worrying about those things now?

You’ve already wasted a paycheck booking this woman for the night, much more so when she requested that you conduct your business in a five-star hotel. Sure, you might have to survive on bland packets of ramen in the meantime but that’s how you survived college anyways. The only thing occupying your mind is how good everything feels when you are deprived of your eyesight. 

It’s true what they say about your other senses heightening because you can feel her hot breath lingering on your neck, her perky tits pressing down on your toned chest as she torturously rides you at a snail’s pace, and her thighs grinding against yours with every movement of her hips. “Shit, Serena. C-Can you go a bit faster?”

The stinging pain of a hand striking your face is the response you got. Right. It’s her rules that you need to follow. Maybe you shouldn’t have given her as much freedom, it’s you that’s paying her bills after all. But that point is moot when she has somehow sunk herself deeper onto your cock and you are gripping the satin sheets with how tight she is, as if she doesn’t do this for a living. 

You fight the urge not to thrust up into her, to just hold on to her waist and go balls deep. You haven’t had sex with your girlfriend in weeks because of how busy you two are and you could use an orgasm or two to let everything loose. But everything about her pussy is inviting and it’s only thirty minutes and you can already feel your cock throbbing. 

She senses this as well because her lips have now moved down to your shoulders and she’s leaving kisses there while a hand reaches down to your balls to fondle it. It’s really becoming hard to breathe, with how her entire body is completely pressed up against you and with how suffocating her pussy is. “Cum for me.” And you do. You are surprised to hear her speak again and the timbre in her voice and the overwhelming sensation of everything causes you to shoot your semen deep inside her. 

She doesn’t stop riding you even as you are barely coming down from your high. Seconds turn into minutes and everything becomes a blur. Round after round of Serena riding you to completion, making you shoot more cum even if there wasn’t any more space left in her womb. Even when you can feel your load dripping back down your cock and balls, she continues to ride you and not at a single point did you even consider what your girlfriend would say if she caught you. Everything is a fucking mess, including your life.

There is a brief moment of solace when she mercifully removes the blindfold, finally. It takes you a couple of minutes to get used to the bright lighting and the first thing that greets you is the perfectly sculpted body of Serena, and the big mess you two have left on the satin sheets with your cum and her juices. Your eyes travel upward, studying every feature of the woman that has drained you and the way her pale white skin glisten with her sweat. 

From her defined abs, to her tiny breasts you wish you have gotten a taste of, her broad shoulders, and finally you get a glimpse of her face. Wait, why does she look familiar? That smile that can light up a room, the way her eyes and nose crinkle as such, the way she brushes her hair back and—why the fuck is she winking at you? She looks a mighty lot like your girlfriend and you think you’re hallucinating. It might have taken a few seconds but everything hits you at once and panic immediately strikes down on you like lightning.

Fuck. That’s your girlfriend’s sister.

“Chaery—“

She places a kiss on your lips to keep your mouth shut and the sudden revelation horrifies and turns you on at the same time. You need to make a decision and you need to make it quick because otherwise your cock is doing it already for you with how quickly her cum-filled pussy rides you back to full erection, with your creampie overflowing between the gaps where your bodies meet. It is hard to formulate a thought when her tongue is sticking deeper down your throat. Screw everything. You wrap your arms around her waist possessively when you sit up to meet her at eye level, deepening the kiss to turn it into a proper makeout session. “Chaeyeon unnie doesn’t have to know, oppa.” Damn right, she doesn’t. You dive in to kiss her again, the risk and debauchery making you want to savor everything even more. 

“Plus, we have six hours left and there’s two more holes you still need to fill. You gotta get your money’s worth, right?”

Damn right, you do.

----------[ BINI Aiah - @octoberautumnbox ]------------

It came easier than most with him, she could even say it came easy, period. His gaze was always soft, his touch always gentle, his tone always sweet when it came to her. Of course, she only knew the him that texts her every first Friday at 5:30 p.m. asking if she's busy that night. And she never is, or always is, because first Friday nights are blocked off by default for her favorite patron. 

It was a broken record that she never tired of: she dresses pretty, he picks her up, they get dinner and drinks, and he takes her back to his place. He and Aiah are so used to it at this point that he keeps telling her to stop dressing too nice but she just can't help it, she has to look good for him!

~~~

It's the most predictable thing in the world, hopping into his car and letting him rub her inner thigh as he drives. It's absolutely no surprise when he orders the steak for himself and the large poutine for the both of them to share. It's the normalest occurrence when the violin guy hovers over their table with a heart-wrenchingly beautiful melody as he admires her eyes over the candlelight. And it sure as hell isn't anything special when she offers his left arm to cling to as they walk back to his car, so much so that the wine he holds with his right arm makes its way to Aiah's instead. 

“Nice, 2020?” She looks over the label, finding a pinot noir brand she couldn't recognize. “Get me drunk, pass time with me, throw me away when you’re done. I know your type exactly,” she teases.

“When did I throw you away? I feed you good food, nothing but love in my bed, I get you home safe every week,” he retorts with a chuckle, counting each one on his fingers. He opens the door for her, and she plants a sweet peck on his lips before settling elegantly back into the car.

~~~

It's all the same game to her, yet she can't deny it's exhilarating every time. Her grip is tight around his back and shoulders, her pedicured nails digging into his skin as he parts her pussy lips apart for him. She moans sweetly, “Fuck, more, please…” as he diligently fulfills each of her prior requests. He does everything she asks of him: in front of the mirror, against the wall, in the bathtub, but Aiah's favorite and the one that absolutely has to end each night, bareback missionary on his fluffy bed while she holds him close to kiss, to hug, to whisper her sweet nothings into his ear. 

“You’re so fucking good, Aiah, I’ll never get tired of you,” he says back, and he kisses her neck gently, driving her wild. 

It's all the same game to her, and it's so easy to predict: the neck kisses come when he's close. She feels him throbbing inside her as he pounds her into the mattress, he's going faster, deeper, and she fires a prayer up to whom it may concern that he goes rougher and rougher still, until–

“Fuck, fuck, FUUUUCKKKKK!!!” she screams loud, giving herself up in service to his pleasure. He erupts in between her velvet walls, shooting his thick and warm seed into her womb, all the while her pussy milks him for everything he's got. He shuts her up with his lips on hers, and Aiah can't help but return his love; she takes his head in her hands, locking him in her embrace. 

And once it's all over, he falls to her side to let her breathe. An arm underneath her head, a cursory “good night,” and all the warmth of the world in him are all it takes to rob her of her consciousness. As the world fades around her, he pulls her close to his chest, and the last thing she remembers, like always, is the aroma of his sweat evidencing his satisfaction with her services. 

~~~

Albeit a bit wobbly, she's able to make her way downstairs. Like clockwork, there he is, finishing up a congee and packing it safely for the car, and she makes her way to the sofa and rubs the sleep out her eyes. She wants to say something, but holds back. Her lips form the shape for the first word, but no air comes out. She repeats in her head again and again, “Can we stay a bit?” knowing the answer, so she never tries. Why go against the program? Why ruin such a good thing? 

~~~

She takes a careful bite of the hardboiled egg, and noticeably he slows down before the speed bump at the entrance to her subdivision. In no time at all they arrive outside her house, and Aiah sets her dirty dishes on the dashboard in front of her. 

“Take care,” she whispers, avoiding his eyes. The usual white envelope falls onto her lap, and it breaks her again. She hears his seatbelt unclasp and fly back taut, but without giving him a chance, she undoes her own seatbelt and pushes her door open, leaving him behind. She runs back to her privacy, swinging open the door and shutting it hard. Aiah holds her breath, before finally letting go when his engine roars to life and grows progressively quieter the farther away he gets. 

Finally, the tears fall. She buries her face in her hands and screams a world-ending scream, then composes herself while she wipes the liquid pain from her eyes. She opens the envelope: fifteen blue bills and a blister pack of her usual birth control. The sight rips her chest apart, and the envelope and its contents are thrown to scatter all over her foyer. Aiah crumples into a fetal position and tumbles to her side, hugging her knees and wallowing in the dread of missing him not even five minutes after they part for another month. 

-------------[ Kwon Eunbi - @rosiesmuts ]---------------

Water Bomb. The festival that revitalized Eunbi's career. Sure it meant getting on stage wearing a bikini top while pretending she couldn't feel everyone's eyes on her tits, but it was worth it for the chance to be seen and heard.

It shot up her fame, gaining her hundreds of thousands of followers and even fielded numerous phone calls and offers. In public, she said she rejected every single one of those guys, when in reality, Water Bomb increased her side gig to unforeseen heights.

In person, Eunbi's way shorter than she appears on TV, barely reaching up to your chest. But, you remind yourself that she's the real deal: her little bikini accentuates her thick curves like a lewd fashion statement; her tits are so round they push back against the thin fabric, and you could almost imagine her nipples pebbling just from you staring.

"There's only one rule..." Eunbi pushes you down on the couch and settles in-between your legs. You groan out when she kneads the tent in your pants with a smug smirk on her face. "...It never goes inside of me..." She frees your cock, wrapping a hand around it and pumping her hand from root to tip, rolling her thumb over the leaking head. "...Just between my tits."

Shit. That's a pretty massive rule for what amounts to your weekly salary. It sounds unfair, and it sort of is. But that's the kinda thing you have to expect when you're with an idol, a walking, talking brand.

Any kind of protest get lost on the tip of your tongue when Eunbi lowers a strap, freeing her breast to the open air, and fuck—her tit is bigger than you imagined, so thick and round and squeezable, topped off by the dark peak of her puffy areola and her stiff nub of a nipple.

"You can touch before I begin..." She grabs your hand and plants it atop her pillowy breast. You can't hold back. The fat fills your hand, overflowing in your palm when you squeeze. The firm yet supple skin is fucking heavenly. There's a halfway sound mixed of a giggle and a moan, and when you look up, Eunbi stares back at you with lust darkened eyes. "Excited aren't we? There's another one too, you know? Feel free to set it free yourself."

You brush the strap aside and Eunbi's top slips over her second breast and off her body, falling down to the floor along with your inhibitions.

For the low, low price of 40 hours of work, Eunbi isn't an unapproachable, untouchable, perfect entity on-screen. With her tits exposed, all natural and bouncing just slightly whenever she moves, there's something intimately real about the way she lets out breathy quiet moans as you massage her breasts in tandem, thumbs circling her pointed nubs.

"Careful... They're sensitive." Her chest juts towards you with every pass of your hand, and you're having the time of your life watching this behemoth of an idol turn into a whimpering wreck. Your gaze naturally strays from her chest to the subtle ripple of her belly and the sakura print triangle of her bikini bottoms.

Eunbi holds up a bottle of liquid and squirts out a decent amount, drooling down her tits and onto your cock. You hiss out, twitching up from the chill, and then moan out when Eunbi runs her dainty fingers over your length, spreading the viscous liquid all over until her palms grip onto your throbbing member.

"Shall we begin? I'm curious to see your expression..." She scooches closer, breasts jiggling against the inside of your thighs and her hands slipping off the sides of her chest, pushing her boobs together, around your pulsing dick.

Her plump flesh surrounds you on either side of your shaft, her breasts massaging your hardness. The lube makes it so hot and slippery, you can almost imagine it's her soft pussy instead. She interlocks her fingers and starts to bounce the soft pliable flesh up and down, the liquid squelching out.

"Ahh~ What a lusty expression..." Eunbi sees the look of euphoria written plain across your face. There's never been anything like the sheer softness, the overwhelming sensation of this world-renowned idol jerking you off with her heavenly tits.

As much as you want to close your eyes and fall in-tune with her movements, the sight of her breasts wrapped around you forces you to continue to stare.

Then something unexpected comes into play. Eunbi pauses her movement on a downward motion. You groan, missing the hot pleasure that just sent you to cloud 9. Until suddenly her cute little peaks out and gives the tip a lick.

'It never goes inside of me...'

The one and only rule re-enters your mind. Then the mischievous sparkle in her eyes leaves you with one conclusion.

"Technically licking it doesn't count... Right?~" Her tongue once again peeks out and wets your engorged, blushing head, the warm and wet, gentle touch shooting pleasure through you. It only lasts a moment until she starts sliding up and down your shaft once more, adding her cute licks as the icing on top.

This must be heaven. This must be what going to heaven is like—having the Eunbi jerking you off with her thick, soft tits and having her pink tongue pepper your cock with gentle kitten licks.

"Ah—!" she gives you a surprised little yelp when the pre-cum bubbles up from the slit of your dick, the salty liquid instantly greeted by the flat of her tongue.

'It never goes inside of me...'

That was the only preamble. The only thing forbidden by the deal. Her lips come dangerously close, puckering open and—

Eunbi is a fucking liar. She wraps her lips around the head and sucks, tongue swirling and lips pursed tight against your swollen cock. You grunt out a curse at the sudden change in temperature, hot and wet. In an instant, you lose yourself, cumming in spurts in her warm mouth, painting her tongue white.

"Mmmph!" She feigns shock and panic, closing her eyes tight and sucking on you in earnest. All the while she maintains her tits wrapped around the bottom of your shaft, squeezing up to catch the last remnants of your release.

With her lips still wrapped around the head, she swallows—you hear and feel the distinct gulp.

Eunbi pushes her bangs back as she finally pulls off your softening, limp shaft. Her hand wanders to her jaw, wiping away any leftover bit that spilled out her lips.

"Oops~ look like I broke my own rule..." she hums, playfulness and mock innocence threading together in her tone.

'It never goes inside of me...'

Bullshit.

---------[ (G)I-DLE Minnie - @svndaysaweek ]----------

Once in for all. You head to the bar you’re regular at. Everytime you tip a glass there, you experience a weird dream and when you wake up you’re in your bed, no memories of how you even made it there.

It’s happened several times already. To the point where you start to doubt if it really is a dream.

A charming bartender, nice drinks, and the addictive dream-like scenes you fragmentarily see like a deja-vu. 

There are different versions of it, but all follow the same sequence: sit down, empty a glass or two, a little chirpy chit chat with the bartender and the very next blink she’s riding you in a frantic manner.

What haunts you the most is that you lose old memories too. The damage is disturbing, since even at work you don’t remember major events that happened. You really should stop drinking, and you're aware of it more than anyone. 

You can’t explain, but you feel like you should just go there again. It’s an addiction, maybe. You know you should stop, but you don’t.

******

The door swings open with the little bells on it quirkily ringing. It’s a dim bar, with the calm noise of people talking and laughing with clinking sounds. Over the counter she’s wiping glasses, not in a tuxedo but in a white sleeveless shirt, long blonde hair over a shoulder and a pair of orbs in her eyes with the aura that a quartz gemstone would exude.

Hot, but not red-hot. Erotic, but not foul.

The very eyes in your dreams that you made roll back.

“Hi, long time! The usual?” Minnie’s grin blooms quickly as if she’s been waiting for you. Then she fixes it the next second, recognizing how unusual it is for a bartender to be as turgidly excited as her.

“I’d love to.” With a bite on her lip she turns around, takes a bottle of whiskey. Then enters a room in the back for a glass.

Your hand automatically takes your phone out of the pocket. You see a message from an unknown number saying ‘Hey we need to talk’, but before you can check Minnie returns with the glass and serves it to you.

“Are you shifting soon? Never seen you in that shirt before,” A sip, and another. “Ah, this? How do I look?”

Gorgeous!

Gorge-

Gor-

…

******

“Yeah, that’s it…” Minnie’s hands are planted on your chest while her hips are senselessly grinding on your cock. The pace skyrockets and her nails dig into you deeper and deeper.

But dangerously you don’t feel the pain. You can only feel how tight she’s squeezing your cock, how sweaty her thighs are, how hot her breath is and how good she’s fucking you.

“Fuck, it gets better everytime… How can I stop fucking you like this…” Her hands are now in her hair, arms open and messing her own hair a bit. 

She squeezes her own breasts before slightly choking you with both hands. You try to reach for her hands, which are cuffed to the bed. Minnie seems to enjoy the surprised look on your face, as her face descends to be just above yours with a pearly giggle.

“Bet Miyeon is all too vanilla to do this stuff to you in bed,” She whispers it right at your left ear before nibbling on it, making you flinch a bit.

“Miyeon? Who is-“

“Never mind, boy. I have only you and you—oh, god I’m close—have only me.” Minnie’s teeth leave a deep mark on your under lip. Her glance is now beyond enrapturing. It’s a poignant hypnosis with a tinge of coercion. 

Only when she cums and squirts on your cock with a rather lunatic moan is the bewitching scrutiny alleviated. The sound of heavy breaths and the tickle of her fingers stroking on your chest is all that you can sense.

And you’re sprawled on the bed, exhausted, with your consciousness fading out. “I have only you, Minnie” is what you lethargically repeat until all becomes dark.

******

You have no idea how you ended up on your bed. Again. The last place you remember you were at last night was the bar. 

Was it the whiskey after all? 

Before you could even get out of your bed a headache swirls inside your head.

I had intense sex with Minnie again in the dream again.

She mentioned someone.

I received a text from someone who wanted to talk with me.

What could all this mean?

All of a sudden, a loud knock on the door shakes you awake from your thoughts. 

“Who’s there?” You shout, and you hear a frustrated, urgent female voice.

“Honey, it’s me! Please open the door and let’s talk!” On the other side of the door there’s a woman standing. Anxious, upset and unfamiliar.

“Do I know you?” It’s a genuine question, because you don’t recognize her at all. “Honey, this is not funny. At all. Why the hell have you been ignoring all my-” The girl tries to grab your hand which you swiftly evade.

“Sorry, but what are you talking about?” 

You’re gazing at her eyes then you’re forced to shut your eyes because of a headache like being shot in the temple.

“Babe!” Down the hallway is Minnie. You are so confused by her calling you that, but it must’ve been the drink. Should’ve drunk less.

“Babe?! Excuse me, but do you know him? Honey, do you know her?” Miyeon looks shocked, terrified, even. “I do. Why are you asking me that? Who are you?”

Disbelief shades her face. “H-honey… What are you talking about? I’m your fiancé! I’m Miyeon, don't you remember?” At the same time there’s a victorious grin on Minnie’s face. 

You’re gazing at her eyes then you’re forced to shut your eyes because of a headache like being shot in the temple. Then all senses fuzz out.

******

“Don’t go too fast, Miyeon! It’s dangerous!” You’re on a bicycle following her, on a riverside road with cherry blossoms fluttering along the breeze. She briefly looks back at you, and the way her hair streams in the wind takes your breath. “You’re saying that because you can’t pass me!” She smiles playfully and speeds up ahead.

“What are you listening to?” She takes one of your earphones after sitting down next to you on the bench. “Just some classics. Autumn is a season of classics for me.” You turn your head in her direction and are stunned at how her look matches the color of the trees and sky ever so perfectly. She can only chuckle at your face.

“Oh my god, sweetheart, yes!” You’re down on one knee, putting a ring on her finger. She’s shedding tears with the happiest smile. “I love you, Miyeon.” You rise and hug her. Your hands are still shaking. Her shoulders shake from her crying.

“I love you too. I have only you. And you have only me.”

******

-------------[ WJSN Bona - @fiorituramara ]-------------

The elevator ride took forever, enough for you to think you were getting up to the heavens (maybe you were); or at least, enough for you to start focusing on the garish marbles inside of the booth finely sculpted with golden inscriptions of the hotel’s logo—you never were particularly interested in interior design especially the pompous branch of it. 

You wouldn’t say you were used to all of this—the high-end hotel with all its lush finishes, the highly competent personnel following you around for every little inconvenience, it was all a bit too much, even if it certainly wasn’t your first time in the midst of all this luxury. 

After all, your business model as a professional companion thrived on the lonesomeness of the wealthiest. Business women, successful lawyers, rich heiresses; all of them had similar needs and you were ready to profit on them by selling your version of love: an illusion.

But this time was different and you knew it, just by feeling. 

Kim Jiyeon wasn’t like any other customer you had before—she was an award-winning actress, a model and an idol. But Jiyeon wasn’t just wealthy, she was absolutely breathtaking, a rare beauty worthy of praise from fashion brands and magazines.

As soon as you walked through the suit’s door a sly smile welcomed you in the warmest way “I hope the reception didn’t make you wait for too long,”

You smiled back, “It’s a pleasure to meet you, miss Jiyeon”

Here she was across the room, sitting on a modish sofa, legs crossed dully waiting for your arrival. She wasn’t wearing anything particularly elaborate: an ashen tailleur leaning on a striped shirt, and a colorful skirt that did quite the poor job at covering her slender legs. A simple fit yet effective at emphasizing her striking beauty. 

“Have a seat, please. Get comfortable,” she said as you happily complied, joining her.

“Wine?”

You nodded thanking the steward as he tinged a chalice in red.

As you sipped on your drink Jiyeon handed you some documents from an agenda

“Formalities, you know” she downplayed it, of course “I just need your sign.”

You quickly scanned the papers in front of you, faking interest. Legal stuff, stamps, authorizations and permits. It was a detailed NDA warding your customer in every possible way, nothing unusual when dealing with well-known personalities, something you knew you would have need to sign.

“I just have one question, a little curiosity of mine” you said, as the pen in your hands swiftly traced the initials of your name sealing the contract. “Why? Why would someone like you even look for my services?”

A sly smile painted on Jiyeon’s face, as if she knew you would’ve asked something similar.

She took your hand in hers, it was warm and soft, and guided it towards her thigh.

“The easy answer would be that I lack the material time,” you listened carefully to every word of her speech as your hand wandered forward, daringly massaging her smooth skin “just getting to know someone is a serious commitment,” 

“I can’t afford to waste occasions with the wrong person with the little time I have for myself,” she continued. Were you moving a little too fast? Maybe. Ten minutes since you met her and you were already with a hand on her thighs and she looked like she didn't mind.

“But if i’m being honest, there’s more to it” as she said that her hand moved to the top of your shirt, slowly undoing a couple buttons, “I’m tired, tired of being what people want me to be, I’m tired of pretending I’m perfect when I’m not. I wanna be flawed.” you dared even more, your fingers traced a ticklish spot on her inner thigh eliciting a whimper. Her hand grabbed your wrist, stopping you in place.

 “I wanna be me.” She looked right into your eyes as she said that, more serious than ever.

Then she got up, right in front of you, raised her legs to discard her boots before climbing directly on top of you.

You let her go on with her act, too stunned to speak up, as she continued with her answer. “Why you, you say? I need professionalism, I need discretion,” 

She pulled on the collar of your shirt and whispered in your ear “but more than everything, I need a good fuck, and I need it now.”

The hot breath on your skin elicited a shiver in your back. “Does this satisfy your little curiosity?”

There wasn’t really a need to answer that.

 You seized her cheeks, leaned in and locked lips. You were dreaming about kissing those pretty full lips the moment you entered the room and now it felt heavenly. You could taste the sweetness on her tongue, as she explored your mouth and you explored hers, a hint of wine still lingering around intoxicating you even more.  Your hands instinctively moved to her back, helping her slipping her now impractical jacket to the floor in anticipation of something more.

Only the need for air was able to break the kiss.

“Dazzle me.” she whispered.

[honeyhoshi]

scarlet, starlet pt. 1

summary: mingyu intends to make his girlfriend's wishes come true — all of them.

this a part of the man of the match universe

genre: professional football (soccer) mingyu, idol oc, porn with a little plot

wordcount: 3,251

pairing: mingyu x afab!reader

warnings: DDlg kink, d/s themes, both parties are safe, sane, and consenting adults, afab reader, lots of mentions of female anatomy, reader is implied to be significantly smaller than mingyu, making out, dry humping, finger sucking, fingering, squirting, huge mingyu, big dick gyu (canon), slight cum play, cum eating, exhibitionism, unprotected sex (pls dont do it, its not worth it), spit kink (bec i wrote it), creampie (also bec i wrote it), size kink go bbrrrr, bulge kink, dirty talk

author's notes: yet another work written for my lovely @madeforgyu! this is just part 1 of her birthday gift and is a part of the universe we have lovingly poured soooo much time and effort in. wuv u and all of that!

The excitement that comes with a new album and a comeback sometimes gets lost in just how complicated AM♡RE’s schedule has become. In between having to do pre-recording as a whole team, music shows would request certain members to be part of other variety segments which allowed other members to rest or even take on other schedules.

This led to fussy 4AM pre-recording sessions then running back to the company office to film overseas interviews and just napping during the car rides to and from one venue or another.  By the time the whole team made it back to the KBS building for the live broadcast, the only thing fueling you was adrenaline and obligation. It’s a so-so way of celebrating your twenty-fourth birthday.

You try to shake it out of your system when you think of the cute pink drink truck that was parked by the entrance to the studio that your fans were enjoying. You think it could be a lot worse because you did catch a glimpse of the many birthday ads all over Seoul as you moved from one location to another.

But still, it could be better too.

With all the last minute activities and schedules being fit into every free moment you had in the past few weeks, it had been difficult to really set any celebration plans into stone with your boyfriend.

Your boyfriend.

A pout makes itself present on your face the second you start thinking of him. Having Mingyu around would make everything that wasn’t ideal about your birthday just simply melt away.

At this point, a message from him would suffice. You’re no stranger to receiving and sending messages at odd times but after Mingyu’s good morning message, all your other texts had gone unread.

You’re wracking your head if he had mentioned anything scheduled today but you come up with nothing because you can clearly remember that he said he was taking the entire day off to celebrate with you.

The thought sticks even as you’re being ushered on stage and you only really snap out of it as you find yourself in front of the crowd, the rest of your members bowing and waving before you have to take your starting positions.

You shake it off, thinking instead of how you’re sure a message from Mingyu will greet you the moment you step off stage.

You’re greeted by something far better than a text message when the music cuts and you’re trying to catch your breath.

A large smile is still plastered on your face as the thrill and joy of performing courses through you. The cheers fill you with warmth and satisfaction, hoping that you had given a good performance for the live show’s crowd, but a voice cuts through the usual noise of fans.

There’s a booming voice coming from the side stage and a “That’s my girl!” that sets every nerve on your body aflame in embarrassment and pride in equal measures.

It’s your boyfriend.

It’s Mingyu.

A bright smile splits your face and you can’t help the flush that paints your face pink as the rest of your members turn to see the afternoon’s special guest. With everyone on stage giggling and whispering amongst themselves with their lapels turned away from their mouths, even the crowd was starting to realize that something out of the norm was going on.

You make your goodbyes quick, giving deep bows of appreciation, but the excitement coursing through your body can’t be contained.

Once your leader has deemed you polite enough, offering you a sympathetic smile and nodding towards the general direction of the backstage area, you can’t move fast enough.

You briskly walk towards Mingyu who, despite his effort at dressing to be discreet, is still the most eye-catching person in the room. Standing tall and proud in the hustle and bustle of the music show staff is the top scorer of the Cheongdam Diamonds, offering you the most wicked grin.

There are so many eyes around you. Looks of jealousy, resentment, and also awe are no longer strange when either you or Mingyu are in the room. Having both of you present just meant all of the above, but a hundredfold. None of that matters to you at all when you let out a squeal and jump into his arms.

You don’t care. You’ve stopped caring. Let them see.

You can no longer count how many bad ideas have become good ones when Mingyu whispers them into your ear. You can’t even remember a time you’ve said no to him and his clever ideas. Not that you ever would really, especially when Mingyu always makes it worth your time.

 It starts innocently enough, as it always does with you and Mingyu.

The second you managed to drag him into your dressing room, locking the door behind him, you had peppered his face and mouth with as many kisses as you could as he giggled and whispered birthday greetings every time your lips parted.

In no time, Mingyu had managed to wrap your legs around his waist and was guiding you as you slowly rocked your hips down onto his. The friction was so delicious even through all the layers of your stage costume but you knew that this would hardly suffice for either of you.

“I fucking hate these shorts,” Mingyu says with a grimace as his hands find their way to your ass, upset to find the layer of your safety shorts standing in his way.

Mingyu has always hated it when he would reach down and find your smooth skin covered with a seemingly offensive piece of clothing. On most days you barely wore any underwear around the house, just the way he likes it.

You love the little look of annoyance in his face and trace the lines of his eyebrows as you sit pretty on his lap, “They’re there to protect me.”

Mingyu can only snort at that.

You roll your eyes playfully, “Imagine if we stopped wearing these, then everyone would see what’s yours, Daddy.”

You feel his frown relax underneath your finger, “We can’t have that now, can we?”

“Nuh-uh,” You answer, allowing Mingyu to guide your hips. Even through the stupid safety shorts you could feel how his cock was pressing against the zipper of his jeans and Mingyu always knew how to find the cleft of your center to ensure that you were grinding your clit onto him.

“Why’s that?” He whispers against your lips, tongue flicking out to lick at your upper lip for just a split second.

You bite your tongue at the pleasure slowly building up between your legs and how he’s teasing you with his tongue, “Because this is yours.”

He makes a face of faux confusion before asking, “What exactly is mine?”

“This pussy.”

“Good girl.”

In no time, Mingyu has you strip for him and you stand before him, completely devoid of your costume. In the back of your head you can already imagine the frustration of the staff member assigned to assist you with getting fully dressed again, but the look Mingyu gives you has you pushing the thought away.

He’s sprawled on the couch as if he owned it and you’re dying to fall to your knees between his spread legs, but the second you move to do so, Mingyu grabs your wrist to stop you.

“It’s my sweet girl’s birthday today, so we’ll do all the stuff you like,” He says, standing up and crowding you against the counters littered with different makeup brushes and pots of eyeshadow and powder puffs.

“But I want to suck your cock,” You state as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Mingyu chuckles and you meet his eyes. You’re entranced.

“I know you do, love. But I don’t want you to bruise your knees when I’m dressing you back in that little skirt.”

He has a point and you frown, “How about tonight?”

He smiles as he brings three fingers up to your mouth, “Okay, I’ll even let you choke on it. Now suck on Dad’s fingers, get them nice and messy.”

You immediately let your mouth fall open and start to lap at the three fingers Mingyu offers you, savoring the salt of his skin and the rough pads of his fingers. If you tried hard enough you could pretend they were his cock, hard and smooth and so so delicious. Your little daydream has you salivating in no time, coating Mingyu’s fingers and lubricating them enough for what he’s no doubt about to do to you.

“Look at that little mouth go,” He marvels, “So small, three fingers can barely fit. Are you sure you can suck my cock?”

You’re shaken from your thoughts and immediately a look of distress spreads on your face, “Yes, it can fit! I can make it fit. You’ll make it fit, won’t you?”

Mingyu’s fingers are barely out of your mouth as you try to convince him. The look on your face makes Mingyu smile. It’s horrible and mean and you love it so much.

“Yeah, I’ll make it fit. I’ll make sure my baby will take it.”

You preen at the promise and wait in anticipation as he pulls his hands away from your lips and pressing his mouth against yours.

This kiss was not exactly a typical one. Instead of pressing your lips together, Mingyu licks into your mouth, his tongue bullying its way inside and pushing your own tongue out of the way. He runs this tongue against the roof of your mouth and against your teeth until you slowly start to press your tongue against his.

You groan in relief as he finally eases up to kiss you properly but tense up when you feel one of his hands grab at your left thigh to lift it up and prop it up on the counter. This position has you spread wide open for him. He loves it when he can see all of you.

The slick that’s been gathering between your folds is surely visible in this position and it makes you clench around nothing as Mingyu pulls away to survey you in this position.

“So so pretty,” He whispers underneath his breath, not even to you, just to himself, “Going to destroy this tiny pussy.”

That’s as much warning as you get before he presses two fingers into you at once.

Mingyu is bigger than most men in all aspects. He’s tall and broad, having put in so much time to get his physique to where it is now. His sheer size followed everywhere else. His fingers were long and thick and the press of two into your core has your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

Whether it was his cock or his fingers, you knew to always expect a stretch. And you loved it.

“Sooo good, Daddy,” is all you can muster as Mingyu sets a punishing pace that has you trembling in his arms in no time.

Each curl of his fingers sent a jolt down your spine that had you inching closer to the edge despite how Mingyu had just started.

“My pussy is taking two fingers so well,” He says, “I think three would be even better.”

You hate that he pulls his fingers out but you’re immediately placated when he brings the two fingers to his mouth to suck your slick off of them.

He makes a noise of delight before removing his fingers and leaning down. For a second you think he’s going to eat you out but instead Mingyu spits out the saliva and slick he’s collected in his mouth and lets it drip down from your clit. 

He moves back to take in the absolutely debauched state of your pussy, smiling to himself, pleased at how messy he’s gotten you, before spreading the wetness with his soiled fingers.

“Are you ready for three, little girl?” He asks, almost mocking. You preen at the nickname and at the promise of the stretch of three fingers inside of you.

Even with the preparation he had given you, he punches a deep exhale from you and he pushes three fingers. The fit is so tight that you can feel how the rough pads of his fingers are. He always did refuse to wear gloves when he lifted weights. Now you want to thank him for it, because the friction inside you makes you want to scream.

It doesn’t help how slowly he’s going either. He’s relishing in how your walls wrap around his fingers, how you tighten up when he slips in a little further. And when he crooks his fingers just right, he can feel how you’re getting just a little bit wetter, slicker.

“You take me so good,” He whispers against your lips, so close it's almost a kiss.

You’re breathless though, mouth slightly ajar, waiting for his tongue to slither between your lips. He doesn’t make a move though aside from a cocky smirk and an arched brow.

Mingyu lets his fingers continue on with their noble job of getting you closer and closer to the edge. Each push and pull of his digits inside you set your nerves alight, but the delicate movement of his right hands make you want to die.

Even as he’s coaxing and orgasm with three fingers on his left hand, the fingers on his right are tracing delicate swirls and unrecognizable patterns along your inner thigh. Every now and then they’d go higher, just by the lips of your pussy.

The pace is much too slow for your liking and you’re worried that your absence would start to seem suspicious. You weren’t at Mingyu’s training center where everything is kept under lock and key with a very well written NDA. You were at Music Bank where staff members were nosy and there was surely another girl group member roaming the halls, praying for your downfall.

“Daddy, faster,” Is all you can manage in between kisses on Mingyu’s jawline, licking a stripe to taste the salt of his sweat and that underlying tinge of just him.

You don’t expect his free hand to come and grip the underside of your jaw, his fingers long enough to reach both sides of your cheeks. He applies just the right pressure to squeeze your cheeks and force your lips into a pucker.

It would be cute if not for the look on Mingyu’s face.

“This is a birthday gift, angel. Be good while I give it to you, hmm?” He says as he begins to pick up the pace.

In no time the pace is punishing, the only thing slowing Mingyu down is how each push of his fingers back inside of you required a stretch and each time your walls made space for him inside you, you let out a little whimper.

When Mingyu presses his thumb against your clit, adding to the already intense pleasure, you can barely keep it together. In no time you feel the telltale signs of an inevitable orgasm.

No matter the method, every single orgasm Mingyu has ever given you was mind blowing, and this would be no exception. You feel the wetness dripping down your ass before you’re comprehending what exactly has happened, having difficulty in processing the immense pleasure coursing through you, your eyes slipping shut at the feeling of cumming all over Mingyu’s fingers.

Your walls tighten around him, even as you spill into his open palm and he continues to push in and out, droplets falling to the floor beneath you and between his feet.

Mingyu’s eyes are fixed on your entrance as he keeps you filled, pleased with how stretched out you are, ready for him to just slip in.

He pulls his fingers out only to move them to cover your clit, gently rubbing, keeping you on the precipice of pleasure, not allowing you a moment to come back to Earth. You’re in that heady space only he take you.

“Eyes open, baby. Watch daddy fuck his cock into you,” Mingyu says with a light slap to your face.

He moves and lifts your other leg up, maneuvering your hands that are wrapped around him to hold yourself open, keeping you fully spread open and seated on the dressing room counter.

Mingyu grasps his cock and gives himself one, two, three pumps to ease the initial need for friction, before he taps the now leaking tip against your clit. A pearlescent drop of precum falls on the hood of your clit and you watch, helpless as he harshly swipes at it with his thumb.

You hiss at rough handling but are immediately silenced when he brings the thumb up and shoves it into your mouth. He presses down on your tongue as if to wipe the cum off his finger. 

He grabs a fistful of the hair at the nape of your neck and smashes your mouths together. You love the way even his mouth seems to hold dominance over your own. The movements, no matter how unruly, are still just the right thing to get you going once more.

“We taste so good together, huh?” He whispers after fucking your mouth with his tongue. He pulls away slightly and lolls out his tongue to let a thick wad of spit fall from his lips down to your center.

The impact of the warm liquid has your gaping hole clenching around nothing.

It pleases Mingyu so much that he forgoes all the other teasing he initially had in mind and just guides the head of his cock to sop up the spit on your pussy before pushing in to the hilt in one thrust.

The blissed out sigh that you let out set him on fire.

Gone is the idea of long, languid strokes to stoke the fire in your belly. Instead he goes with a punishing pace that has high pitched cries slipping from your mouth.

His hands find the thickness of your ass to keep you in place, his hips doing all the work of rearranging your guts. In this angle and position, he can see how the head of his cock bulges in your abdomen slightly. It if was possible, he would have gotten harder.

Having already been so sensitive from hardly being able to come down from your first orgasm, Mingyu’s actions had you reeling into your second one in no time.

“My princess deserves to come already,” Mingyu says, slightly breathless, leaning his forehead on yours “Dad wants this pussy to never let him go.”

You nod in agreement, “It's yours forever. I love you.”

It almost seems pathetic for him to cum at those words, but it's a spectacular orgasm as he pulls out until only the head of his cock is inside you before he slams his hips flush to yours and letting himself flood your pussy with his cum.

You’re delirious as he keeps you steady,  pulling out so slowly to make sure you keep every single drop of him inside of you.

“Keep it in until you get home,” He says, “I want to slip right in the second you get through the door and still feel me inside you.”

You press your lips to his once, twice, and a third one for good measure before nodding excitedly.

“It’s your gift to me. I won’t let a single drop go to waste.”

remy @ahreumtouch • may 8 GUYS I JUST READ THE CUTEST FAN ACCT FROM TODAY'S MUBANK WTFFFF

remy @ahreumtouch • may 8 There's a special guest at today's live performance!! After the Midas Touch recording there was a really loud and DEEP cheeer coming from backstage. The members were all looking to see who it was ijbol!!

remy @ahreumtouch • may 8 Ahreum was so happy when she figured out who it was that after bowing and greeting fans she left the stage but her mic was still on!!

huhu our baby was probably so happy and giggly as she always is! the op of the fan acct thinks its Mingyu!!

thank you Mingyu for loving and taking care of our precious Ahreum! 🥹🫧🩷

remy @ahreumtouch • may 8 CONFIRMED WTFFFFF 😭😭😭 Mingyu was seen leaving Music Bank today!!

SIR U R A FOOTBALLER U HAVE NO REASON TO BE AT MUSIC BANK IF NOT FOR UR IDOL GF!!

[saursoob]

OK HEAR ME OUT!! RIKI X READER WITH THIS PROMPT: "I know it was a dream, but I felt you here."

A/N: AAA THANK U FOR THE REQUEST SORRY FOR THE WAIT HERE IT IS!! (i made this before the fate tour ended so just imagine 😁)

synopsis warnings: niki is exhausted and misses you, crying, sobbing, sad, comfort, fluff

word count: 708

niki slowly awoke to see you only inches away from his face with a faint smile as you admired him, “good morning” you said as you kissed him on his forehead. he backed away quickly, his widened eyes in shock, “w-what are you doing here y/n?” you laugh at his question like it was a silly thing to ask. “niki what are you talking about?” his eyebrows tightened, “but y-you’re at home? you’re not here with me...” his eyes became watery as his confusion shifted into sadness. he was aware you weren’t actually with him. “i- i miss you so much y/n” he said as he pulled you into a hug, tightly wrapping his arms around you as he began to sob. “i want to go home but i cant. you’re home”

niki awoke in his hotel bed with dried tears in his eyes. that dream was too real, too cruel.

-

niki’s day went on and finally ended after another draining concert. exhausted, he sat on the hotel bed resting his head against the headboard, he sighs deeply as he restrained himself from crying. it was all crashing down, all the feelings he pushed aside towards the dream he had this morning all coming back to him.

unwillingly tears trickled down his face, he couldn’t handle it anymore. his heart ached, he was so physically and mentally exhausted and you. you weren’t here to make it better. he missed your touch, your kisses and cuddles.

he thinks that ultimately it could be worse. you do call and text after every concert but— its not the same.

shit. you always call after a concert.

his phone next to him lit up as the words on the screen illuminated “incoming facetime from y/n <3”

he quickly wiped his tears before answering and made sure his face wasn’t showing on screen to prevent you from seeing his puffy eyes.

he only showed the ceiling of the room as he picked up. “h-hey y/n.” he stuttered and his voice came out shaky. you look at your screen took aback, it was obvious something was wrong. you softly asked, “niki, is something wrong?” you could hear faint sniffing coming through your end of the phone as he responded, “no nothing.. i just— really miss you y/n” his voice sounded dejected, it broke your heart to hear. “me too.. i miss you too niki” he slowly showed his face to the camera, the room was darkly lit with only the lamp on, his cheeks a pink hue and had tears streaming down his face. “but- it’s different, i- i cant do this without you.”

you sighed as you quickly adapted to the situation you have to be strong for him and for you, but being honest seeing your boyfriend in this state made you want to cry as well. be strong. you have to find out what happened for his emotions change so significantly in only a days time. “‘ki- what caused this, i swear you you fine yesterday? did something bad happen?” he shook his head, “no, nothing bad happened..” “is that really true niki.” his lips turned into a slight pout, “its just i ..i had a dream last night that you were here. it felt so real and i knew it was fake. i knew it was a dream but i felt you here. it was such a cruel dream.”

trying your best to shift his mood you put on a smile, “i know its been hard for us but we can push though it, we have before yeah?” he nods his head to that, “yeah we did.” you giggle, “and we will again.” he wipes his tears, sighing dramatically as he rolls his eyes, “i do miss your kisses though” you laugh, “ill make sure to give you tons of kisses when you get home” he moves the phone extremely close to his face, “you better, i’ve been deprived enough” you suddenly come up with an idea, “niki get closer to the camera” he lowly chuckles, “uhh okay” as he approaches to get closer you rush to quickly kiss the camera “there a kiss” he lets out a surprised laugh before saying, “wait i didn’t get to kiss you back”

[fallingdownhell]

Heyaaa!

I saw your request is open soo...

Can i request gn reader with Ayato, Kazuha, Diluc, and Kaeya where the reader is pranking them by shouting their full name (since we know their full name) what is going to be their reaction?

Feel free to ignore or decline this request^^

I love this! So much! Thank you for your request<3 Characters Included: Kazuha; Diluc; Ayato; Kaeya Content: gender neutral reader; established relationship; pranking the boys by calling their full names; not proofread yet Word count: 2,6k words Have fun with this one<3

Kazuha

This morning was peaceful, Kazuha thought as he layed in bed, the morning rays of the sun shining in through the open window. He let them warm his body as he slowly woke up more and more from his slumber.

When he extended a hand to feel for your sleeping body next to him, he found the space empty. Cold at that, indicating that you've been gone for a while.

A groan left him, Kazuha hated it when he woke up without you next to him. He'd much rather spend his morning cuddling you in bed than doing anything else.

But then the next moment, the smell of something cooking hit him, and he knew that you were already out and about making breakfast for the both of you.

So, with a sigh, Kazuha decided to get up and get himself ready before heading down to join you in the kitchen.

He got up from bed and stretched his body out first, then headed into the adjacent bathroom. Taking a shower first thing in the morning always felt refreshing to him and it most often than not was the last push he needed to fully wake up.

Once that was done and he headed out of the shower again, Kazuha got dressed and combed through some tight knots of his hair. He was still in the middle of doing so, when suddenly, the silence of the house was interrupted by a shout of his name.

"Kaedehara Kazuha! Get down here!", your voice shoutet and instantly, Kazuha's body froze up. There were a million thoughts in his head, and yet also, not a single one except for: he had somehow fucked up.

The tone in which you had shouted his name sounded mad and if that wasn't a clear indication about your mood, the use of his full name certainly was.

To not make your mood any worse, he hurried to put the comb away and throw the last piece of clothing on while he already hurried out of the bathroom and towards you into the kitchen. He was preparing himself internally for whatever it was that he did that pissed you off so much and already had a million apologies on his tongue.

But, to his surprise, when he got to the kitchen, he found you there, utterly calm as you put the food on two plates for each of you. You didn't even notice him coming in.

"(Name), my love..", he carefully spoke, just in case, but in reality, he was so confused.

"Oh, good. Food's ready!", you look up and smile at Kazuha, which then throws him completely out of loop. He just stands there and stares at you.

"Is something the matter, dear?", you ask him, that smile still on your lips as you sit down at the table. That's when the puzzle pieces fall for Kazuha and he visibly relaxes, letting out a drawn out breath.

"Please, don't do that again, love. I was scared for my life."

You laugh at that, apologizing for scaring him that much. He doesn't really care as long as you apologize with a cuddle session afterwards.

Diluc

Since you moved in with Diluc at Dawn Winery, the time you spend together has improved significantly compared to before, but it still wasn't nearly enough as to what both of you would want it to be.

He still had lots of work to do, managing the Winery, the Angel's Share, and all the business he likes to take over as the Dark Night Hero. Even so, the fact that the two of you are now living under the same roof has changed things for the better.

You know get to see him every morning, since Diluc has made it a point to stay in bed until both of you have to get up for work. You always eat dinner together and he makes an effort to spend every other evening with you. He really tries his best for you.

He even moved his office next to your shared bedroom, so that there aren't too many rooms between you and when you want to see the other, you only have to go into the adjacent room and not wander the entire mansion.

Tonight was a night Diluc had dedicated to his work, which he made you aware of and you were okay with, since you told him that you could use the time to continue the book you were currently reading.

Diluc was hunged over stacks of papers, trying to sort them from most to least important before he went into looking over them. He had worked through a good portion of it already, thinking that he was making great progress. When he looked at the clock on the wall, it told him that it was already almost midnight.

But not to worry. In about an hour or so, he would be done and could join you in bed. Or so he thought. But when he wanted to continue his work after a short break, he suddenly heard you yelling from next door.

"Diluc Ragnvindr!", your voice shoutet his name and he immediately picked up on the tone of your voice. You sounded upset..

Instantly, he began thinking back, trying to figure out what could have made you angry at him. You were fine when he last saw you at dinner, smiling and laughing with him. Then he went to his office afterwards. He couldn't possibly have done or said anything to upset you... right?

His body, that had faced towards the door that lead to your shared bedroom, began to act on his own and he got up and walked over there. Diluc gently knocked on the door, opening it a bit and sticking his head through the gap.

You were laying on the bed, comfortably tucked in and reading your book.

"Everything okay, my love?", Diluc softly spoke up, not sure what to do but he definitely didn't want to make you further upset.

At the sound of his voice, you perk up and face him, a smile spreading on your lips. You place the book down on the nightstand before extending an arm towards him.

"I'm cold. Come cuddle with me." you say in a small pout, which confused Diluc even more. You sounded so mad just now when you yelled his name. Not just his name, but his full name! So why.. were you acting like nothing was wrong?

Still, he complied to your request, his work and papers forgotten for now as he joined you in bed. You made yourself comfortable in his arms, your head and part of your upper body resting on his chest as he began to play with some stands of your hair. Everything was peaceful, but Diluc's mind was still running, trying to make sense of everything. In the end, he decided to just ask you about it.

"Are you mad at me?"

"No? Why would I be?", you asked him, but your voice sounded sleepy already

"Because you were yelling earlier. And you used my full name. Not just my name or a petname. So I thought..", he got interrupted by a chuckle coming from you.

"I'm sorry, baby. I was just messing with you a bit. Just wanted you here to cuddle with you."

A joke... that's what it was. He couldn't help the relief that washed over him hearing that, and the tension finally left his body. He's not mad at you, but please, don't do that again if you don't want him to have a heart attack next time..

Ayato

Being the spouse of the head of the Kamisatio Clan was the best thing that could have ever happened to you. Although Ayato was a busy man with much work, he always made sure to make time for you to spend with him, just the two of you.

Every day, he made that effort, even though this sometimes meant even more stress for him with certain work if he put if off too long. But to him, it was worth it when he did it for you. He's a loyal man in that regard.

One of the downsides to this however, is the fact that this man often times overworks himself without even realising it. Before you came around, it was Ayaka's and Thoma's job - but mostly Thoma's - to take care of Ayato and remind him to take frequent breaks in between.

Now, you like to take over that part for Thoma, taking every chance you get to see your boyfriend, even if it's only a few seconds to remind him of a break or to bring him something to drink with some snacks.

Ayato really appreaciates you doing this for him, smiling every time and stealing a quick kiss before you're gone again. He thanks Celestia each and every day for you being so understanding with his work.

But that doesn't mean that there aren't still days where breaks just aren't possible and he has to power through or else it would never get done.

Today was such a day. Ayato leaned back and let out a heavy sigh as he finally finished with work for today. He has been sitting in this room - his office - the entire day, cramped up and not able to take even a single break. Come to think of it, he was so focused on his work that he didn't even know if you've come in here at all today to check on him. He's sure you did, as you did it every day, but he didn't even notice..

Not to worry. He would simply rest here for a few minutes, trying to come down before he would set out to search for you. Being in your presence was exactly what he needed to recharge some of his engery again.

Closing his eyes and listening to the silence around him, Ayato took a deep breath, calming down more and more the longer he continued to do so. Just a bit longer and he'll-!

"Kamisato Ayato!", a voice suddenly called out his name. And not just any voice, but yours.

His eyes immediately snapped open at the use of his full government name. No cute nickname, nor petname, not anything.

At first, he was too stunned to react, trying to figure out if what he heard was actually real or just something his brain made up. For a few seconds, he sat there and listened to the silence that followed. Just as he was about to relax again, he heard your voice calling him again.

"Kamisato Ayato! Get over here, now!", you shouted for him again, this time your voice sounded a bit more aggressive than before. Now he was certain that this was not his brain playing tricks on him...

Not knowing what had happened but also not wanting to upset you even more, Ayato quickly got up and exited the room. He didn't know where you were, but you sounded rather close, so there weren't too many options available. After looking through some rooms, he found you in the dining room, placing down plates full of steaming food on the table.

"Darling? Are you okay?", Ayato asked as he entered the room, wandering over to you and catching you in his arms, holding your face in his hands.

You smile up at him, circling your arms around his neck and pulling him down for a quick kiss. "Everythings fine. But you've been in there the whole day and dinner is ready so I figured I had to get you out of there somehow."

It then clicks in his head, that you weren't actually mad at him and it was just a trick to lure him out.

"Oh, you little devil~", Ayato smiles down at you, gently poking your nose which made you giggle.

"Hey, it was effective, wasn't it?", you defended yourself and he had to agree with you there. After all, no matter what, you'd always be his top priority..

Kaeya

You and Kaeya had a great relationship going. Both of you had busy jobs but you still tried to spend as much time together as possible. As a rule of thumb, you've come to an arrangement that every other day, one of you would spend the night over at the others place, since you're not living together at this point.

It's worked out great for you two and sometimes, even though you're together, you can still do your own things, and just enjoy each others presence.

Like today, for example.

You two were at your place, both on the couch. Kaeya was sitting comfortable at one end of the sofa, studying over some plans and things he had to look over for Jean for the knights, while you were laying down, head placed on Kaeya's lap while reading a book.

There was a comfortable silence as each of you was doing his own thing, though every now and then, Kaeya would reach down to brush through your hair. You knew he liked to do that as it calmed him down. And you enjoyed it, so no reason for you to complain about it.

However, it was getting late already, the fire also slowly dying down, so you decided to end your book for today. You told Kaeya that you'd go to the bathroom first, so he had a bit more time to study through the plans. He smiled at you and nodded while you headed towards the bathroom.

Kaeya sits there for quite some time, but he's not really focusing on the reports all that much anymore. He's getting tired and listening to the water running from the bathroom, he can't wait to get into bed with you.

So, deciding to leave it be for today, he places the papers down on the table and lets his head fall back to relax a bit until you were done in the bathroom. He wouldn't have minded to join you in there, either...

As he sat there, relaxing and thinking, he closed his eyes for a bit. But the longer he had them closed, his eyes grew heavier and heavier..

He was about to fall asleep, when suddenly..

"Kaeya Alberich!", you voice sounded from the bathroom and Kaeya's eyes snapped open at the use of his full name.

You'd never done that before, not even when you were mad at him beyond anything. What could he have done that could possibly bring out such a reaction in you?

Quickly, he got up and headed to the bathroom where he heard you from, but things weren't adding up for him. Everything was fine until a few minutes ago. You'd never done this, so why now, so suddenly?

There hasn't been any arguments the past weeks, everything was going smoothly. Unless he said or did something genuinely horrible..

But he was pretty sure that he didn't..

But if not, then there was only one other possiblity...

Rounding the corner, Kaeya knew immediately what was up when he saw you standing there, smiling brightly at him, looking like you were quite proud with yourself.

"Yes, my dear?", he asked, smirking as he leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed in front of his chest.

"Would you be so kind and help me with my hair?", you ask, your voice ever so sweet again, like you didn't do anything at all.

"Of course.", he leads you to the bed and makes you sit and face away from him before he goes to work on your hair, gently tangling out all the knots that had formed in them.

He won't say anything about it or hold it against you, but if you keep doing this over and over again, he might have to come up with something to teach you a lesson not to scare him like that again..

[buckyandgeraltsupremacy]

remus x shy!reader (part 5)

author: sj

warnings: fluff; BARELY sexual content if you really squint; reader is in hufflepuff; uses she/her pronouns; not edited

next and probably last part will be the other boys finding out !!!!! :)

masterlist

part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4

---

remus felt like he was going to explode. if he didn't kiss you he was going to lose his mind. it all started the week after you had gone on that first date. sirius had made the comment about you snogging someone and then all of a sudden, all he could think about was your lips.

he had woken up from a very vivid dream about your lips and how soft they would be, a warm, fluttery feeling floating in his chest, heart beating wildly while your lips started moving down towards his chest. he could feel you light laugh giggling against his neck while you smiled, moving your way down. remus had woken with a start in the middle of the night, abruptly realizing that you kissing his neck wasn't real.

the next day in class, all he could think about was your lips, moving their way across his body mapping it. he also had to keep readjusting his pants at the thought of you and it only got worse when he had to look at you, eyes drawing towards your lips every time he looked at you.

not only did he struggle with this for a week, but it was also getting close to the full moon and remus was going to cry if he didn't get to kiss you and now, which led to now.

"hey rem!" you exclaimed, eyes brightening and smile getting bigger as you realized he was in the common room, curiously without the other boys. he loved the way you weren't shy around him anymore. the unguarded way that you let your smile shine when talking to him.

"hi bun." he said back, arms wrapping around you as you immediately wrapped yourself around him. you sighed into his touch. nothing compared to being wrapped in your favorite person's embrace. hugs were always welcome with you and your friends, but there's something about remus' hugs that made you all warm inside, melting all your insecurities away and replacing them with warm confidence.

"love, can we talk?" your heart immediately drops at his words, anxiety creeping up into your throat.

"yeah? whats wrong rem?" you ask, pulling away from him slightly to look up into his face.

"nothings wrong love. i just... can't do it anymore." your heart is increasing at this point, thinking he's going to tell you that he's in love with someone. of course he is, why wouldn't he be in love with someone, he's one of the best men you've ever met. or he's uncomfortable with how touchy you are with him. you immediately start panicking.

"what do you mean?" remus can see the panic swirling in your face and how your face has significantly drained of color.

"no, no, bun. i just can't stop pretending i don't have feelings for you. i'm tired of not telling you how beautiful you are, how i want to tell everyone you're mine, and how i just so desperately want to kiss you." remus rushes out, making sure that you don't think he is trying to get rid of you, if anything he just wants more of you.

you stare at his eyes, brain trying to process the information that just came into your ears. you felt your heart beating extra hard, the words you had always dreamed of hearing coming out of remus' mouth not registering in your brain.

"what?" you asked.

"i like you, bun. and if you don't feel the same, we can just move on, but if you do, please let me kiss you." you can hear yourself audibly swallow.

"but rem. i don't... i've never kissed anyone. what if i don't it right?" you whisper, cringing at how pathetic it sounds coming out. remus' eyes widen and a small smirk lifts his lips.

"bun, you couldn't be anymore perfect if you tried. kissing will come naturally to you. plus a little practice has never hurt anyone." he smirks, his eyes looking between yours and going down to your lips. you smiled at his response and tilted your face up towards his. his met yours eagerly and gently, causing your knees to weaken. his big hands came up to your face and cupped your cheeks and after a minute of savoring the moment, he pulled away and your eyes opened to see his gleaming back at you.

"you are the sweetest thing in my life, bun." all you could do was grin back, heat creeping up to your face.

[headspace-hotel]

How am I going to work for a living when being around other people, moving between different environments and expectations, or being exposed to noise for more than 3-4 hours a day makes me so exhausted it's challenging to perform basic self-care tasks, and pushing past that makes this condition worse, and doing that frequently creates long-term spillover that impairs my functioning for a much longer period

The psychologist who diagnosed me with autism insisted that I could become desensitized to noise through exposure, but it's been almost 10 years and I've never been able to increase my tolerance to stimuli even temporarily, only dramatically decrease it through, I guess, the cumulative effect of exhaustion.

The last semester in school I was having anxiety attacks every single day the first week, and from there I just...limped. I never got to the point where I felt okay and could think beyond just surviving the next day.

I would go to work and basically just, screw around hoping I wasn't in the way too much, because I could not move myself to think on the level of problem-solving and work on projects I wanted to accomplish, I was just too exhausted. I didn't meet any new friends. I didn't go to a single non-required event, even though I wanted to. My mom would ask me if I was enjoying my classes and I would be like..."I don't know." I was often too tired even to play Minecraft.

And I didn't read or write any fiction, even though my love of doing so used to be the fundamental part of my identity.

I kept getting extremely dehydrated and having scary symptoms and being unable to figure out what was wrong. I remember feeling certain that I was starting to get sick/run a fever at many different points throughout the semester, and then I would keep going and feel like 10% better and after a few days it would be clear that I wasn't sick and I wasn't going to become sick nor would I get significantly better quickly. I was sleeping a LOT—like I would be too tired to stay awake by 11:30pm, which is seriously unusual for me and usually means I'm getting sick, and yet I overslept my classes more times than I could count. I felt sure I had some sort of infection or something for the last couple weeks, and then when I came home for the holidays, everything just... cleared up. Still not sure if it was the dehydration or what.

Also, my menstrual period went irregular again??

[woso-dreamzzz]

Difficult

Ingrid Engen x Mapi Leon x Child!Reader

Summary: You're acting difficult with your Mamí after the World Cup

Mamí is looking at you.

You look back at her.

Her eye twitches.

You don't move.

"Shoes on," She says firmly.

You throw your shoes clear across the room.

She looks at you.

You look back.

"y/n," She says," Go and pick up your shoes. We're going now."

"Nej!"

"We don't have time for this! Go and get your shoes right now or so help me-"

"Why?"

If there's one thing Mapi hates more than you saying no, it's you asking why.

Stepping into the role of Mamí was something she had expected when she started dating Ingrid. You were little more than a baby when you arrived in Barcelona with your Mumma and you couldn't really remember much of your life without Mapi.

For the most part, you were a little angel and you flipped between your languages with ease but sometimes you get into moods when you don't want to speak Spanish or Catalan and you will pointedly refuse to interact when somebody speaks to you in them.

"y/n," Mapi says again, ready to do something that she hasn't quite thought of yet but Ingrid interrupts, walking over with your shoes in her hands.

She speaks to you in Norwegian, talking quicker than Mapi can translate but you sag in defeat and allow your Mumma to put your shoes on your feet. You wander over to Bagheera, giving her lots of kisses before Mumma helps you put on your special training backpack and you wait by the door.

Mapi frowns as she watches you. "Why won't she listen to me?"

"She's been with me all through the world cup. She's probably just adjusting back into the normal routine. She's been with my national team for a while. Just give her a bit of time to get used to all the Spanish."

Mapi gives you nothing but time. You still remain moody throughout the week until you're absolutely grating on her last nerve.

The day starts like normal. You're cheerful and happy when Ingrid gets you up that morning and eat your toast and eggs with little fuss.

But when Mapi tries to brush your hair, you shriek and whine every time the brush goes through. You snap your teeth at her when she tries to wipe your face - which is suitably horrifying because she and Ingrid were so sure that you had finally outgrown your biting phase.

You make a growling sound at her as well which she isn't sure where you've learnt that from.

Her eyes narrow. "No," She says, her finger coming out to rebuke you," We don't bite."

"I didn't bite," You reply oh so smartly and Mapi doesn't really have a response to that and you take the chance to hurry to Ingrid's side, conning her into picking you up.

Ingrid drives to practice which leaves Mapi to suffer through you repeatedly kicking her chair and denying it.

"y/n," Ingrid finally says," Enough now. Mamí doesn't need her seat kicked."

You stop but glare at the back of her seat.

You snap at her again when she tries to get you out of your car seat.

"y/n!"

Mapi almost swears at you. She doesn't but she's getting seriously concerned that your biting phase is back with a vengeance.

"Nej!" You spit back," Want Mumma! Not want you!"

Mapi's heart breaks in an instant. You've said a lot of things to her before, in the heart of the moment, but never something like this.

"Mumma! Mumma!"

Ingrid sighs deeply as she gets you out of your car seat.

Usually, you walk in between your parents but today (like so many days recently) you refuse to. You stick to Mumma's side and throw dirty looks at your Mamí whenever she tries to catch your eye.

By the time you all get to training, you've brightened significantly but remain frosty to Mapi, clinging to Frido's side before scampering off to see Caro.

●～●～●～●～

Your attitude towards Mapi takes a turn for the worse when she's not with Ingrid.

Currently, you're sitting on your blanket on the pitch, watching everyone train. You've got your usual set up of food and drink and stuffed teddy bear so you're not used to being bothered.

When Mapi does so, you get angry very quickly.

At first, you don't talk to her. At her verbal prodding, you glare and, when she tries to touch you, you strike.

Your baby teeth sink into the flesh of her hand, right between her thumb and first finger.

Mamí swears when you release her, turning away to try to wave the pain out of her hand. "y/n!" She snaps and you make a screeching noise in response.

By this point, the other girls have stopped to watch the confrontation and your Mumma comes running over to you.

"y/n!" She says firmly," We don't bite!"

"I bite!" You yell back. You kick your legs into the ground and snap your jaw again when Mamí reaches out to you a second time.

She recognises it for the bluff that it is though and she picks you up. You try to ragdoll and go limp to get out of her grip but it doesn't work. She walks you further away from the other girls and forces you to sit cross-legged, looking away from the pitch.

"You're going into a timeout," Mumma says, having followed you," Until you can calm down."

"Nej!" You spit back, trying to escape but Mamí puts you back every time.

You hiss and spit at her. "Hate you, Mamí!" You scream in her face," Hate you, Mamí!"

She looks positively heartbroken at your words and Mumma whispers something in her ear. Mamí looks back at you for a moment before she nods sadly and wanders back inside.

Mumma fixes you a hard look. "We don't spit or bite or scream, y/n. And we don't lie and tell Mamí that we hate her either," She says and you ignore her.

Ingrid crouches next to you, a hand on your shoulder that you relax into. "What's going on with you, elskling? What's happened? Come on, tell Mumma?"

"Mamí," You say through gritted teeth.

"Mamí?" Ingrid asks," What happened with Mamí?"

"Was bad!"

"Mamí was bad? How was Mamí bad? Does Mamí know?"

"Mamí knows," You insist," Mamí was mean and made me feel icky so I'm doing the same!"

"Elskling," Ingrid says," Just because Mamí made you feel icky, doesn't mean you should make her feel icky back."

You grunt and turn to look at the boards in front of you. "Don't want to talk anymore, Mumma. Bye-bye."

●～●～●～●～

Mapi's falling into a spiral by the end of the day. She feels like an absolute failure, unsure how to salvage whatever she has left of her relationship with you.

As she's debating just breaking down into tears in the hallway, she notices that the meeting room door is opened a crack.

She spies you sitting on the floor with your blocks. Alexia is sitting with you, cross-legged.

She passes you whatever block you want and pretends to be a big scary monster so you can have something to knock down your towers.

You look content and happy with Alexia and it makes Mapi want to cry all over again, unsure of what could have sparked you to reject her since your return home.

She almost turns away and leaves, phone out to text Ingrid to come and collect you when she hears Alexia speak.

"You got pretty mean to your Mamí today," Alexia says as she plays with your blocks.

You shrug. "Deserved it."

"Oh?" Alexia glances at Mapi, who she's now realised is peaking through the crack in the door. "How come?"

"Didn't come," You reply, turning a block over in your hand.

"She didn't come?"

"When Mumma was at the world cup and we had days off. Mamí didn't come to see us." You sigh a big sigh that's too big for a little girl like you. "Wanted to see her. Missed her but she didn't come."

"Oh," Alexia says," Did you tell her that you missed her and you wanted her to come see you and your Mumma?"

You give your Tia a weird look. "Why? Mamí has magic powers, she tells me so. Mamí says she always knows what I'm thinking because I'm her bebita." You nod firmly. "So Mamí knew that I missed her and wanted her and she still didn't come. Mamí doesn't love me. Mumma says that people who don't love you sometimes make you feel bad on purpose and Mamí did that because she knew I wanted her and she didn't come."

"Oh."

Alexia shoots Mapi a look, who quickly looks away. She had told you that she could read your mind before but that had been a while ago and to scare you into behaving when you went out to the fancy restaurant that she took you and Ingrid to so she could finally talk about you all getting a house together.

Alexia's eyes tell her that it's time to sort this out so Mapi pushes the door open.

"I'm sorry, bebita," She says as she steps inside.

You jolt in shock at her being there but you don't start screaming so she takes this as an invitation to continue. She doesn't want to completely shatter your idea of her having magical powers so she twists the truth only a little.

"Mamí's very sorry she didn't visit you and Mumma," She says first, crouching down so she can look at you instead of down on you," My...My mind-reading powers turned off while you were gone and I didn't turn them back on until you were back, bebita. I'm sorry I didn't realise that you wanted to see me in person."

You look at her with a frown before you nod. "Sorry for biting you, Mamí," You say," And for being mean and for screaming and not speaking my Spanish."

"I accept your apology, bebita," Mapi says," Thank you for apologising. Can I have a hug now? I've missed my y/n hugs?"

You surge up from the floor to hug Mamí tightly. She rocks you back and forth for a moment before pulling away and placing her hands on your cheeks. "And I love you very much and I'll always love you, okay? No matter what."

"I love you too, Mamí. I'm sorry I said that I didn't."

"It's okay, it's okay."

She pulls you in for another hug and keeps you there as she and Tia Alexia talk for a little while before you're carted off to the car.

Mumma is leaning against it, swinging her keys around her finger. She looks up in surprise when she sees you completely relaxed in Mamí's arms.

"How are my girls this afternoon?" Mumma says.

"Me and Mamí are going to play with Bagheera!" You reply brightly," And Mamí says she'll read me my bedtime story!"

You continue to blather on as you're strapped into your car seat.

"All made up then? All happy?" Ingrid teases and Mapi rolls her eyes.

"As long as her biting thing remains a phase," Mapi replies," Then we're golden."

[pupyuj]

→ “nobody like you.” || nakamura kazuha x reader fic.

— a party gone wild and a kim chaewon out of control leads to the unraveling of a new side to kazuha that you have never seen before in your years of being a couple...

word count: 2.8k.

dynamic: dom!nakamura kazuha x sub!reader.

content warnings: smut, oral, cunnilingus, fingering, masturbation, faceriding, overstimulation, nipple play (kind of).

requested ? : yes!

a/n: wasn't sure what kind of story anon wanted for this request so i just went ahead and did what i felt was fitting! sorry this took so long anon omfg i'm kinda bad at this sdkhskhsdk...

if miyawaki sakura could ask people what they think of nakamura kazuha, she could probably guess their answer.

sweet, soft-spoken, kind, beautiful, talented… kazuha was every guy and girl’s dream partner, but she was taken. taken by the smart, funny, and charming (y/n) (l/n)—you—and together, you were the campus’ hottest couple. always the main topic of every conversation, and the two of you were the people that everybody wanted to attend huh yunjin’s end-of-the-summer pool party. and indeed, you did attend, and immediately people swarmed you as soon as you stepped a foot inside yunjin’s door.

it only snowballed from there. people were dragging you to every corner of yunjin’s house either for a drink, a chat, or to make you play a round of a stupid game. it wasn’t very rare for you to be bombarded by people considering you were popular and just a please to be around. you have gone to countless parties where literally everybody talked to you, and maybe it was all the alcohol she consumed but this time around, nakamura kazuha was not at all happy with all the attention you were getting. and that, in miyawaki sakura’s opinion, was some juicy news.

“what’re you staring at, gorgeous?”

huh yunjin has appeared, possibly to make sakura’s night worse or significantly better.

“i haven’t seen that look on zuha’s face before.” sakura said, eyes flickering back and forth between you, who was dancing with a few of the party-goers by the poolside with a drink in your hand, and kazuha, who was sitting on a reclined chair with her arms crossed and a frown on her face. she was eyeing you intently, her eyebrows deeply furrowed and brown eyes dark and, admittedly, a bit scary.

“well, shit. didn’t know she had it in her to get jealous like that.” yunjin nods, following sakura’s gaze on kazuha.

“can’t really blame her. everybody in this party of yours is in love with (y/n), they’re all practically trying to charm her over there,” sakura tilts her head to get a better view of your face from where she was standing. you can handle your alcohol well, so you weren’t the least bit tipsy. you just looked like you were genuinely having fun, twirling around people and laughing with them. and then… something makes sakura’s eye twitch. “oh no. things are about to get worse.” she muttered, shaking her head.

inside that little dancing circle was a wild kim chaewon, drunk out of her mind. she was dancing with you, maybe a little bit too close to your girlfriend’s liking. kazuha watched as chaewon took your hands and put them on her waist, putting her own around the back of your neck and started moving with you. of course, you were thinking that chaewon was just having fun like you were so you didn’t think anything of her suggestive eyes and the way she bit her lip while she swayed to the music with you.

kazuha shifted uncomfortably in her seat, briefly looking away from you and chaewon to take a sip of her drink. she didn’t like what she was feeling. chaewon was one of her best friends, one of the few people she trusted with her biggest secrets and her life, and kazuha obviously knew chaewon just had a little bit too much booze, and that you wouldn’t do anything to break her heart but she couldn’t help it. she should be the one dancing that close to you, she should be the only one looking at you like she wants to eat you up.

kazuha finishes her drink and steals another one from a guy who was walking by, immediately swallowing up all of the alcohol in the glass before starting to saunter towards the dancing circle. she keeps on stealing at least four other people’s drinks and finishing them in a split second, slowly losing her sobriety. eventually, she was stumbling into everybody until she made it in the circle. eyes glued onto your and chaewon’s figures, burning with both rage and lust.

sakura frantically shakes yunjin’s forearm, “control your girlfriend before kazuha drowns her in the pool.”

“chaewon’s not my girlfrie—”

“just fucking go, huh yunjin!”

before kazuha could do anything she doesn’t want to do to chaewon, yunjin swiftly swoops in and steals her away. now yunjin was dancing with chaewon, who immediately pulled her way too close for anybody’s comfort. you laughed at the sight, and then you grabbed by your girlfriend by the arm. her eyes were dazed, but you couldn’t see them as it was dark and only neon lights illuminated the place. you feel kazuha embrace you, putting her head on your shoulder and lazily dancing with you.

“hi, baby. i was starting to miss you.” you whispered in her ear, wrapping your arms around her waist and gently swaying her.

kazuha lifts her head from your shoulder, leaning dangerously close to your face, “didn’t think so. you looked busy with chaewon-unnie.” she says with a pout. and immediately, you figured out why kazuha had suddenly decided to drink so much. she was usually strict about her alcohol consumption, being friends with kim chaewon and huh yunjin required her to be after all. so, seeing her lose all that control and level-headedness just because she was jealous, well, you can’t say that it didn’t melt your heart.

“you know how unnie gets when she’s drunk,” you kiss kazuha’s lips briefly. she needed more. “she would never steal me away from you.”

“but these people would,” kazuha said, gesturing to everybody else in the circle. she glared at some guy behind you that had been staring at you for the longest time. “they look at you like you’re some… object they can take off my hands as soon as i lose interest, as if that’ll ever happen. don’t worry. i’ll show them wrong. we both will.”

and suddenly, kazuha was dragging you out of the circle and inside yunjin's massive house. the two of you passed by sakura, who merely waved as she watched you depart. you had to admit, you were getting excited for the night ahead. what could kazuha be planning for you after all that she’s seen? certainly not dinner in bed. not in the normal way, maybe. sex with kazuha has always been a bit… vanilla. not that you were complaining about it — however kazuha wanted to go about sex, that’s what you made yourself get used to. even if sometimes you just wanted her to go batshit crazy for once.

hopefully tonight’s the night.

kazuha tugs you inside the first room she comes across in the second level and immediately pins you against the door, lips crashing onto yours just as quickly. she could care less if this was yunjin’s room—based on the guitar in the corner, it probably was—she needed to teach all those creeps downstairs not to try and take what belonged to her.

“zuha… are you mad at me?” you asked while your girlfriend trailed wet, sloppy kisses down your neck.

“no, (y/n). those idiots are who i am mad at. not you, not even chaewon-unnie.” kazuha reassures you. she pulls off your robe, leaving you in your very eye-catching red bikini, and her hands start roaming all over your body. on a normal day, kazuha would have been handling you like you were made of glass, always careful not to bruise you or wound you, but this day has been anything but normal. so, kazuha’s touches were a little different; they were rough, desperate, and so hungry. she was groping your tits, slapping your ass, grabbing your jaw roughly to control the kiss… this was an entirely new side of kazuha that you were growing to like, really like.

she pulls on the ribbons that tied your bikini together, letting them fall to the ground and leaving you completely naked before her. kazuha has never before tried to be controlling of what you wore—she loved showing you off, anyway—but after seeing how everybody looked at you tonight, kazuha might just start telling you to start wearing full-body padded coats. but no, she wouldn’t actually do that. kazuha herself loved your body too much. every curve, every flaw, every scar… she could touch you forever, really. her kisses wander lower, from your collarbone, to your chest, to your stomach (where she left several hickies because she knows it was where people look at you the most), and finally, she reached your pussy, practically dripping.

“we’re gonna make them hear all the sounds only i can bring out of you, okay?”

kazuha lifts one leg over her shoulder, leaning closer and dragging her tongue along your slick folds. “oh… fuck…” your hands immediately find their place in her hair, tugging at it lightly as kazuha continues to give your pussy small kitten licks. kazuha has always been addicted to your taste. during the early year of your realtionship, and sometimes even now, there were many nights were kazuha fantasized about eating you out all day everyday… picturing you in her head with your legs spread open for her, dripping with cum because of her tongue. it always feels like the first time, too.

“zuha… get going already…” you were whining, patting your girlfriend’s head desperately. well, kazuha didn’t need to be told twice. she parts your folds with her thumbs and sucked on your throbbing clit, eliciting a loud moan that you didn’t care to suppress at all. “k-kazuha…! fuck!” your voice was the sweetest thing kazuha has heard, and you sounded best when you were screaming her name, and that was exactly was she was planning on doing all night.

you push kazuha’s head closer to your cunt, “good…! good, good… fuck, more..!” kazuha couldn’t help but smile. she sucks on your clit harder, watching as you threw your head back on the door and failed to cover up your sounds even when you’ve tried to clamp your mouth shut with your hand. she gives you a stern look whenever you did, giving you no choice but to put your both of your hands on her hair and let every noise be heard by everybody. kazuha gently takes your clit between her teeth, making your knees buckle and almost collapse on her but she kept you steady. “ahh..! shit, kazuha… babe, i— uhhm…!!” your nails dug into your girlfriend’s scalp as she continued to nibble on your clit, introducing you to a kind of pleasure that was both so overwhelming and so fantastic at the same time.

one flick of her tongue and you were falling apart — squirting all over kazuha’s mouth while she tried her best to simultaneously lap you up and keep you steady. “mhm, good job, (y/n).” kazuha gave your cunt one more kiss before standing back up. she tugs you along towards the bed, and you really did try your best to walk properly through that haze in your head. you watched as kazuha sat down on the soft mattress in front of you, pulling you close and placing a kiss on your tummy, “we’re gonna keep going.” she says.

you smiled at her, cupping her face in your hands and leaning down to kiss her, “whatever you want, angel.”

and then kazuha was laying down on the bed, beckoning you over with a single finger. “right here. on top.” she was saying, pointing at her face. you had to admit, you were taken aback. you have never once sat on kazuha’s face before nor have you ever suggested it to her. you simply didn’t think she was interested in it. she must really want to prove a point to everybody.

getting over your initial shock, you climbed on top of kazuha, giving her a brief kiss on the lips before settling yourself near her face. your knees planted on either side of her head, your pussy hovering slightly above her mouth. “z-zuha… are you sure ab— ahhn!” you gasped in pleasure, your entire body shuddering when kazuha suddenly grabbed your thighs and forced you down on her mouth. immediately, her tongue was deep inside your hole, pleasuring you in all the right spots. it didn’t take long for you get a hold of yourself and finally move, once again holding onto kazuha’s hair as you rocked your hips against her mouth.

you were moaning and howling her name, completely forgetting about the people that might hear you. you should have known riding your girlfriend’s mouth would feel this good.

“k-ka… ahh… zuha, baby… mhm!” she slaps your ass, urging you to go faster. and so you do! you clutched the bedsheets with one hand, your girlfriend’s head with the other, and bucked your hips faster and harder on your girlfriend’s mouth. little by little, you were losing yourself in pleasure again. kazuha was way too good with her mouth, and your clit was so sensitive that even when it was only brushing against her nose, it pushed you closer and closer to the edge. 

kazuha holds your thigh with a death grip, guing you as you eagerly rode her mouth in pursuit of another orgasm. she uses her free hand to reach down, slipping her fingers inside her own bikini and toying with her clit. you sounded so heavenly, and the sight of you playing with your nipple made it impossible for kazuha to resist anymore. she moaned in your cunt as she fingered herself to the sound of your voice. you had no idea she was doing this, being so occupied with your own pleasure.

“i’m c-coming.. baby, i’m— fuck!”

kazuha captures your clit in her lips again, making you scream and collapse forward. you held onto one of the pillows tightly, trying your hardest to not lose your head completely but goddamn, your girlfriend was quite literally going to drive you insane. kazuha thrusts her fingers inside herself faster, nearly the same pace you rode her mouth as if it was a strap, or her thigh. “z-zuha…? please, i can’t hold it…” you reached down from under yourself and put your hand on kazuha’s head again. closer and closer, it was getting harder trying to hold on. all it took from kazuha was another flick of her tongue and her teeth grazing your clit before you came with a long, blissful moan.

kazuha holds you down on her mouth, catching every drop of your cum and swallowing. her own moans were muffled by your cunt as she climaxed on her fingers, and you still had no idea. you were breathing heavily against the pillow that was soaked with drool and tears — you felt a good kind of devastated. see, you would never want to make kazuha feel like she wasn’t the most important person in the world to you but if she fucks you that good when she’s jealous…? you might try riling her up every now and down.

after a while, kazuha scoops you up in her arms, pressing your head against her chest. “sorry if i scared you.” she whispered against your forehead. she realizes now that she may have overreacted, as well as overdid it with you. “i trust you, (y/n). and i trust chaewon-unnie, too. i just…” she didn’t know how to explain herself. it wasn’t as simple as her being afraid that someone will just steal you away. it was much more complicated than that. so complicated that she couldn’t explain it.

“i know, baby,” you tilted your head up, looking at your beautiful girlfriend right in the eye. “but you should know that i would never trade you for anyone else. my heart is yours, there’s no one like you.”

and kazuha believed you with all her heart. you shared soft smiles and one small ‘i love you’s before the two of you fell asleep in each other’s arms. it should be noted that a certain huh yunjin and kim chaewon barged into the bedroom in a lip-lock but were shoo’d away by a half-awake kazuha, who glared at them and pulled your sleeping figure closer. yunjin and chaewon, what with both of them being drunk, were going to retaliate and confront kazuha about stealing their place until sakura grabbed them both by their ear and dragged them out of the room, telling them to ‘fornicate’ somewhere else.

sakura smiles at you and your girlfriend on the bed, but immediately sighs remembering the events from earlier. at least the situation was fixed! sakura was still surprised to know that kazuha had a side to her that was completely unknown, however. perhaps things really do change.

so now, if miyawaki sakura was instead asked what she thinks of kazuha, she’ll probably say fuck around and find out. the girl was full of surprises, apparently.

[junkdrawerfics]

First Meeting

Jasper Hale X Reader

Series of Firsts

Summary: The first time you meet Jasper Hale is when you get lost in the woods. Is he your rescuer or the danger you should be looking out for, though?

Words: 1712

Note: New series wooh! Hope you guys enjoy!

---

Moving to Forks in the middle of summer had its pros and cons.

Pro: You have plenty of time to explore and get to know the area.

Pro: You can adjust to the new home before school starts.

Con: You haven’t been able to meet many people your age and therefore have no friends yet.

Con: You thought it would be nice to take a walk by the woods, but you swear you saw a hurt cat and you tried to help it but it ran away and you followed it and now you’re lost.

The last point may not have anything to do with it being summer, but still.

On the bright side, you did catch the little guy! Not without a few scratches, but you got him.

You perch yourself on a tree stump, a small tabby kitten nestled in your arms, completely tuckered out from running. Careful to not jostle him,  you give him a good once over. It looks like he was maybe clipped by a car, or maybe a bike, dried blood running down one of his legs which looks significantly out of place. 

Poor thing.

Sighing softly, you tuck him back into your lap and glance around. The trees all look the same, and you have no clue what direction you came from. There’s no way to tell what time it is either, since you left your phone at home and the sun is completely blocked out by the clouds. Not the best situation.

At least it’s still light out, you think to yourself. It could be a lot worse. For now, it’s light, you’re warm, and you told your mom you were going out before you did, so she should notice when you don’t come back in a few hours.

If you don’t make it back yourself, that is!

“I don’t suppose you know the way out?” You hum, scratching the small kitten’s head as he raises his head at the sound of your voice. He looks at you with dark amber eyes, barely open.

“Mew.”

“Hm, I thought so.” You shake your head with a fond smile. “That’s okay. Maybe if I just start walking, I’ll find someone.”

The kitten grumbles a little when you pop to your feet. Might as well go with your gut, right? That’s what people usually do in situations like this. So, you go to set off in the directions you think you came from. Hopefully. 

Until you hear a loud snap come from behind you.

Every muscle in your body goes still. The ball of fur in your arms bristles, suddenly far more alert, letting out a quiet, squeaking hiss. It makes your chest tighten, a spark of fear and realization traveling through your bones.

Are there predators in these woods?

“You’ll hit the coast before you find a soul if you go that way.”

The sound of a low, rumbling voice immediately puts you at ease, the tension dripping from your shoulders. Thank the heavens you don’t have to wander even deeper into the woods. There’s no telling how much more lost you could get. You turn to thank your savior, eyes going wide when they land on him.

Pretty. That’s your first thought.

He’s very pretty. For a moment, you could even convince yourself you are just looking at a sculpture abandoned in the woods. He’s tall, very tall, gold hair falling to his sharp jaw, skin shockingly pale in the dim light. His eyes, dark and narrowed, glint with curiosity and maybe a hint of concern as he looks you over.

Heat flares across your cheeks. This feels straight out of some teen romance novel. A handsome stranger comes to the rescue of the damsel in distress. Except, while he is a handsome stranger, you are dressed in an oversized, pastel hoodie with cat scratches all over your face and hands. Not to mention the mangy kitten in your arms who looks like he wants to kill the man.

What a sight this must be for him.

You offer your rescuer a wide, somewhat awkward smile, “Thanks for telling me. I definitely have no clue where I am, if you can’t tell.”

The man tilts his head, brows furrowing, “How’d you end up all the way out here?”

“Well-” You shrug, shifting back and forth on your feet. “-it was just supposed to be a walk, but then I saw this little guy and he looked like he needed help.”

His eyes dart down to the small kitten in your arms, lips twitching in amusement. The fluff ball glares back at him without hesitation. You shuffle him in your arms a little, trying to get him to calm down, but he stubbornly clings to your sleeve so he can see the blond.

“I chased him out here,” you continue, settling for just clutching him against your chest, just in case he tries to be rude. “His leg looks pretty bad and I just couldn’t leave him, you know? I’m pretty sure he needs a vet, but I don’t know how to get back to town. Could you maybe um…”

You trail off. You shouldn’t hesitate to ask for help, you know it’s silly, but you don’t want to bother this guy. What if he was on his way somewhere? Maybe he could just point you in the right direction. But what if it gets dark before you get home? The thought of walking through the woods at night is not one you’d like to live through.

After a hard second of him looking at you, as if trying to figure out whether you’re a threat or not - which feels kind of backwards if you’re being honest - the man seems to soften. His posture loosens and a small, charming smile slants his lips. 

Your heart stutters.

In a very old-school, gentlemanly way, he offers you his hand, “It’d be a privilege to escort you back, miss-?”

You stare at his extended hand, completely oblivious to his question until you glance up and see him watching you expectantly, lips pursed, dark eyes dancing with amusement. 

Oh!

“(Y/n),” you blurt quickly, face going impossibly redder. “My name’s (Y/n) (L/n)! I just moved here.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, (Y/n).” The smile comes back, wider, brighter, and you want to melt. “Name’s Jasper Hale, I’ve lived here quite some time.”

“Well, it’s nice to meet you, too, Jasper Hale,” you chime, finally taking his hand (much to the kitten’s displeasure). “Especially now. I would've been wandering out here for a long time if you hadn’t showed up. Who knows what’s out here.”

Something flashes through Jasper’s eyes, but he merely smiles and agrees, “You can never be too careful.”

“I’ll keep that in mind next time,” you sigh, following him as he starts in the opposite direction you were going to go, “It’s my fault for thinking I didn’t need my phone. It’s just my luck to not have it the one time I need it.”

“Bad luck finds you at the worst times,” he hums wistfully.

“This is your fault,” you whisper down at the kitten, who has settled down a little bit, “You’re not even black, how are you so unlucky?”

He blinks up at you, looking unimpressed. You laugh, scratching his chest softly.

“I think he’s mocking me,” you murmur, “He probably doesn’t even need my help based on the fight he put up.”

“He just doesn’t know what’s good for him,” Jasper chuckles, something fond starting to grow in his chest.

He had been hunting when the scent of fresh blood had drawn him further into the woods. He didn’t even remember moving, hunting it down, nothing until he came to a dead stop there at the edge of the small clearing. That’s where he found you, watched as you slowly, patiently coaxed the angry kitten into your arms.

He doesn’t know what made him stop. What overcame the burning thirst in his throat. But when he laid eyes on you, listened to you talk to the kitten as if it would talk back, felt the gentle positivity coming off of you like pure warmth, it just disappeared.

Replaced with a burning curiosity and something fiercely protective.

Who was this girl he’d never seen before? Why was she all the way out in the woods, at least thirty minutes from the town? Alone? What if something happened to her?

The moment you started walking in the wrong direction, he couldn’t stop himself. Against his better judgment, of course. He couldn’t just let you wander off alone, though. The others will probably be angry with him once he gets back, but at least he can make sure you get home safely.

Which he does.

You stop at the edge of your yard, turning to him with the softest, most genuine smile, brimming with gratitude.

“Thank you, Jasper. Really. I hope this isn’t the last time we meet?” Your eyes glow with so much hope, and he can’t bring himself to deny it.

He should. He should stay far away from you, because something tells him that as much as this new feeling in his chest could be something good, it could also be something horribly dangerous. For you. He should stop it here and now, cut all ties.

But he saw how well that worked for Edward.

So he nods, dares to lift your hand to his lips and press a ghost of a kiss to your knuckles. Jasper can feel your life under his fingers, hear your pulse race, and he expects the thirst to come roaring back, to feel some kind of temptation, but the only thing he feels is your overflowing, bashful joy. And he loves it.

“Until next time, miss (L/n),” he murmurs, and you giggle, “Try not to run after any more injured animals, alright?”

“I’ll try,” you promise, feeling high as a kite.

“Good.” Jasper grins.

He watches you go inside, just to be safe, making eye contact one last time with the furry, little creature still in your arms, right before the door falls shut. It glares at him, tiny tail thrashing.

Unlucky, you said.

Maybe.

You’ll both have to wait and see.

---

Next

I'm pretty excited about this new little series! It'll be super simple, just a series about different "firsts" you have with Jasper, ie first kiss, first date, etc. If you want anything specific, let me know!

Also, I know it might be a little unrealistic, but I don't care! That's not what this is about lol

[circle-with-me]

Sweet Nothing - Nicholas Ruffilo x Reader

Pairing: Nicholas Ruffilo x reader

Warnings: none. very fluffy :)

Word Count: 1k

Tag list: @deathblacksmoke @concretenoah @malice-ov-mercy @sitkowski @meekahy @cookiesupplier @lacktoesandtoddlerants @sammyjoeee @collective-heartbreak @agravemisstake @catharsis-in-darkness @unicornfairytail @0fth34byss @to-be-written @collapsedglasshouses @itsafullmoon

You prop your elbow up on the window of your car bringing your hand to your face to massage your temples. Traffic on the highway was backed up, as if your day hadn’t been bad enough, and your tension headache was getting worse. You honk your horn at the person in front of you knowing it wasn’t going to accomplish anything but it let out some steam. The two of you exchange rude gestures and you groan, scrubbing your hands over your face.

All you wanted was your bed and Nick.

The front door closes behind you and you're immediately met with a mouthwatering aroma. All of the stress from work had left your appetite lacking but you couldn’t deny Nick’s cooking. As you step closer to the kitchen, you hear Sinatra softly playing and even softer still, he’s humming.

You stand in the open doorway and observe him. His raven black hair is pulled into a messy bun. Perched on his nose, one of your favorite things about him are his black rimmed glasses. He pushes them on top of his head when the steam of the pasta hits them, causing them to fog up.

Anyone else would be annoyed by such a thing but not Nick. He stands there with a content smile, continuously humming and cooking without a care in the world. You desperately wish you could be as laid back as he is. He’s your safe person. The one thing you know you can rely on. Just being in his presence relaxes every muscle in your body.

Nick turns around, his eyes lighting up at the sight of you. He wipes his hands on the kitchen towel draped over his shoulder and moves towards you. Both hands cup your face as he leans in to place a delicate kiss on your lips. He pulls back and smiles fondly, caressing your cheek with his thumb.

“Welcome home, my love.”

His face drops when he sees the red splotches on your face from where you’ve been crying. You shake your head, unable to tell him what happened without your voice breaking. He understands immediately, wrapping you in his arms and kissing your head.

Nick lets you melt into his arms and stays there with you, silent and without any need for discussion. You’ll tell him when you’re ready and he has all of the time in the world. He hums “I’ve Got You Under My Skin” softly in your ear. He rocks you gently to the music, and pretty soon you’re swaying together.

The buzzing in your ear from his chest vibrating eases the pressure in your chest. The hand that isn’t clasping yours tightly strokes your back. You let out a sigh of relief and you feel Nick smile as he kisses your temple.

“Why don’t you go take a long hot shower while I finish dinner? We can eat in the living room and watch your favorite movie.”

You murmur an “okay” but don’t move, wanting to enjoy his warmth for a moment longer. Nick delicately reminds you that he’s cooking pasta, mentioning what happened the last time you distracted him from cooking. Suddenly remembering the burnt noodle incident you blush and quickly turn on your heel towards the stairs. Nick chuckles at your hasty exit, snapping you with the towel.

“For what it’s worth!” He yells up the stairs, a smile clear in his tone. “It was totally worth losing the pot over.”

You return to the kitchen later, clean and significantly less tense thanks to the scalding hot water of the shower. Nick compliments your pajama choice, an oversized band t-shirt and white cotton shorts with cherries on them. The shorts are his favorite because he loves playing with the frilly trim at the bottom, the tips of his fingers lightly brushing against the top of your thighs. Naturally, you wore them all the time so he would do just that.

Nick hands you a plate of food with a smile and a kiss on the forehead. He tells you that everything is set up in the living room and he’ll be in shortly. The plate in your hand nearly falls to the floor when you walk into the living room.

Nearly every pillow and blanket in the house was on the floor in front of the couch forming a makeshift bed for the two of you. A huge tent made out of bed sheets was covering the couch and most of your little pallet area. Gold twinkling lights were strung across the tent. A few lit candles were placed safely on the mantle. It all completely took your breath away.

“What do you think?” Nick whispers in your ear. You jump, nearly dropping your plate again. He wraps an arm around you and kisses your cheek, nuzzling you as he waits for a response.

“It’s wonderful, Nick.” You lean against him. “Thank you.”

Another kiss is planted on your cheek and he moves his hand to your lower back guiding you to your spot for the evening. Nick turns on Labyrinth and you eat your dinner together, singing the songs together and reciting every line. After you finish eating, you sit your plates on the coffee table that had been pushed to the side of the room. Dishes can wait until later. You settle into Nick’s arms, tucking your head underneath his chin.

As the night passes, you end up lying on your back with your head in his lap opening up about your day. Initially your story is all hands and theatrics, going on about a particularly frustrating coworker. When you get too worked up, he carefully takes your hands and places kisses on each knuckle. It was his extraordinary Nicky way of saying “calm down, I’m here.” You take a deep breath and collect yourself, continuing.

The endearing smile on his face as he listens intently almost makes you forget what you’re talking about. You can be your most vulnerable self with him without fear of judgment. His blue eyes have never once regarded you in any way other than tenderness and understanding. As you continue, the tattooed hand making gentle passes through your hair soothes your worry.

Eventually, you drift into silence. It’s comfortable. Relaxing. You hear his breathing change and see that he’s fallen asleep, his head shifted to one side. You’ll wake him up soon enough to lazily drag yourselves to your room for the evening. For now, you’ll lie here and thank whatever deity exists that this man chose you.

[screamingcrows]

A Good Night's Sleep (part 2) - Zandik x Reader

Author's note: Feed this to an AI algorithm and I'm giving you Clostridium difficile. Also fuck this. This is nowhere close to what I wanted, so now I'm throwing it out so it won't leer at me from my wips. Maybe I'll come back once I get over my subconscious aversion to writing smut. 1.8k words Warnings/tags: dubcon, but not how you think, dry humping, blood (very little), fem reader, tigers have barbed penises, earlier somnophilia, panic, coercion, they're both something, suggestive, nsfw, zandik is stuck in his head Part 1 MINORS, AGELESS, AND BLANK BLOGS DNI - you will be blocked on sight

"Go back to sleep"

There was a slight crack his voice despite Zandik's best effort to keep it even. He had already moved away from you, shaking his hands in the air, trying desperately to rid himself of the unpleasant sensations.

His palms tingled, caressing the ghost of your skin with every frantic movement. For the third time in his life there was nothing in his mind. It made him want to rip his hair out.

You were turning around.

Something had to be done to make you stop, he wouldn't look at you. Moving in tandem, he rolled onto his other side. The front of his boxers was wet. An urge to scream scratched at the back of his throat.

"Zandik? I- I asked you a question…"

Her voice felt like syrup, flowing into his ears. Thick, disgusting, alluring. The light sniffles were filtered out by his mind, as was the way her breaths became increasingly erratic. It felt vile, being an insect writhing on silken strands was not something that suited him.

Zandik recoiled when your fingers dug into his shoulder, you shouldn't be reaching out for him. He shuffled further towards the other side of his mattress. A calm mind to handle this, that's what was needed, and nothing about you trying to turn him around was calming. Although his mind had cleared significantly, there was still a bothersome ache in his body.

"And I said go back to sleep," he'd snapped the words at you before he could stop it.

Everything felt awful when he pushed off to stand, blanket sliding into a pile. His back was towards you when he clambered out under the net, stomping barefoot away from your little camp. Under normal circumstances he would've scoffed at anyone doing the same, if was unsafe and a blatant overreaction.

That didn't matter. Not when he could feel the sticky substance sliding down his abdomen. How it made the fabric cling to his skin. Worst of all was the smell of his own release. Even while covering his mouth and nose with a hand, he could detect those musky notes.

It made him gag, crumpling into the underbrush as he fought back the urge to empty the contents of his stomach. Morbid curiosity bid his free hand to ghost over his crotch, body jerking when he felt the wet patch. Even worse was the fact that he was still-

He shook his head, uncaring that his head still swam and any jostling came with a risk. A clear mind, that was the least he could supply. Soft sounds of running water caught his attention. Perfect.

It was closer than he'd dared to hope. Half tumbling down a small hill before he found himself on his knees. The water had already been disturbed by his movements, if there were predators, stealth was no longer an option.

The least he could do was practice restraint this time. Being found half naked, mauled in a stream was far from the legacy he desired. After what felt like an eternity of bated breaths, eyes flickering around the dark forest, Zandik dared to relax a little. If a spinocrocodile or worse had been nearby, it would've already struck by now.

Cleaning himself took longer than what was reasonable, but the cool water helped to soothe the prickling under his skin. Thoughts of you were kept at bay by his shivering, and every tantalizing memory that did make it through those defenses was quickly decimated with a simple look at the consequences in his hands.

Failure was a ruthless teacher.

His hands remained submerged in water, fingertips slowly going numb. Slivers of moonlight crept through the canopies above. There was something twisted in how gently it caressed his features when his head tilted back. Why would it shine so lovingly on him now?

Perhaps playing your preordained part was the only way to be accepted by them.

Walking back turned out to be more difficult than expected, feet dragging along the ground being a particular nuisance when paired with less than optimal lighting conditions.

How was he going to explain that he was naked? The thought of stumbling into someone else on the short walk back briefly flashed through his head, but that was a thought he would not entertain. Not until faced with that reality at least. And what would he say when you undoubtedly kept pestering him with questions?

There was no doubt that he had to go back, you still had things to complete the following day. And returning to the Akademiya alone would be folly, not when everyone knew you'd left together.

He rubbed at the bridge of his nose, briefly flinching from the cold touch. How was he supposed to deny what you would've pieced together in an instant if you were properly awake. Convincing you it had been a figment of your own imagination was undoubtedly the best course of action. If only there were dreams to blame.

Conveniently, your back was turned towards the direction he emerged from. Carefully maneuvering back to his mat, he swiftly looked through the modest bag he'd brought, desperate for something to cover himself with after forsaking his clothes in the water. A waste, but one he couldn't bring himself to care about. Especially not when his focus was broken by you moving a little.

With rising adrenaline, he swiftly lay down, struggling to pull the blanket over himself without alerting you. Clean boxers gripped tightly in his hand, he waits with bated breath for what feels like an eternity, accompanied only by your soft breaths and the ringing in his ears.

When you hadn't moved for a while he took the chance to shuffle around a bit, intent on finally getting dressed again and forget this ordeal.

"You know," your soft voice caused his breath to hitch, the silence deafening before you continued, "you could've just asked me…"

He lay frozen, leg raised off the ground, boxers halfway on as he considered if acknowledging your statement would doom his set course of action. Before he could finish the thought, you continued, uncharacteristically certain with your words.

"I'm at least guessing it wasn't an accident?"

"I simply needed some air and got up. It's none of your concern," he found himself struggling to remain cordial.

Why couldn't you just leave him be?

He heard your little huff, could almost see the way you were no doubt leering at him, deep eyes narrowed in frustration. It was infuriating how quickly you flooded his mind again, the clear water of the stream having done nothing to wash away those urges.

"Why can't you just admit to it? I know that was cum on my back, Zandik. I'm not stupid."

"Good, then you'll have no trouble understanding when I tell you to stop bothering me and go back to sleep."

Admittedly, the words came out harsher than intended, but the longer you remained awake, the more difficult it would be to write all this off as a drowsy delusion.

When his eyes finally closed, everything finally began to feel better. The ordeal had even made a comfortable weariness settle behind his eyes.

It took mere minutes before his rest was disturbed by a weight against him. He turned onto his back, wanting nothing more than look at the stars and scream. Instead he was met with your face hovering above him.

You adjusted your body, straddling his hips as you straightened your back. His eyes were wide, following the lines of your body, seeing the light bruising that had bloomed from his touch. Shame burned in his blood, not from the action but the confrontation that he hadn't been nearly as restrained as he thought.

He took a deep breath, tensing when your hands pushed down on his shoulders.

"Get off"

"Why? Isn't this what you wanted?"

He had to grit his teeth when you rolled your hips, keenly aware of the blood gathering down there. It didn't help how warm you felt against him.

"I said, get off"

You shot him a glare, nails digging into his shoulders a little. He knew the look in your eyes. You were plotting something, and if he wasn't struggling to keep his focus away from your lips, he might have been able to prepare.

The relief that entered him when you leaned forward was palpable, trapped in the mindset that you would climb back down. Instead your warm tongue pressed against his pulse, dragging up the column of his neck. It made him groan, hands shooting up and grabbing your waist in an instant to stop your movements.

That was a mistake. Once more feeling your softness had his mind reeling, and he didn't miss how sighed in satisfaction when his grip tightened. Your breath wafted against his ear, close enough that he could almost feel your soft lips against his skin.

"But I want to do this with you"

Something in your voice made him shiver, stoking the embers of an unknown force. It made him briefly pause, and that was apparently all the opportunity you needed. He doesn't have time to react before you've pulled the blanket out from between your bodies.

You're practically laying atop him, the feeling not nearly as restrictive as feared. Eyes fluttering at the odd comfort it provided.

"How are you-" his voice falters, nothing but static in his mind for a moment. "How can you enjoy this?"

Bubbling laughter ringing through the darkness is all the answer he gets, swiftly accompanied by the press of lips against his collarbone. He writhed at the feeling, obtrusive and much too intimate. Would you rip out his throat if given the chance? Would he?

His fingers were sneaking under the hem of your shirt, discovering with dismay that the fabric had a moist spot at the very bottom… You hadn't changed. Repulsive.

He has to yank your hair for your lips leave the bruise they'd been carefully nurturing. Your expression reminds him of predator moments before it strikes, and he can only scold himself for not recognizing that of course the intensity he respected would bleed into every aspect of your being.

"Stay with me."

A groan is ripped from his throat when you bite down at the junction of his neck, one of your hands tugging at his hair. Tentatively, his fingers run along the curvature of your spine, feeling how you arched for him. Warmth spread through his body with every kiss and lick to the column of his neck, barely noticing how you were grinding against him.

It did feel good, he wasn't blind to how his cock throbbed from the stimuli. But that was nothing compared to the feeling of your back splitting open under his nails, nor were the whines spilling from your lips.

[chaoticbardlady99]

Never Have I Ever… (Astarion x F! Reader) MDNI 18+

Synopsis: You accidentally befriended the Heroes of Baldur’s Gate at Elfsong a little less than a year after the Elderbrain attacked.

Six months later, on your birthday, you are playing a game of “Never Have I Ever” at Elfsong Tavern and a topic of conversation takes a very interesting turn… that leads directly into the bedroom with your roommate, Astarion.

CW: PIV, Oral, Smut, loss of virginity, other sex words I can’t think of, brief mentions of past trauma

Pic does not belong to me

Likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated 💜 thank you for reading!!!

The warm laughter that fills the air is infectious as you take another welcome sip of the red wine Astarion insisted you try. You are so horribly in love with the man that he could probably convince you to enjoy poison if he really tried.

As a new introduction to the friend group, you didn’t expect to find a roommate a short 3 months after getting your job at Shadowheart’s Clinic. You had just moved to Baldur’s Gate- you apparently have horrible timing- but you were happy to help with healing the injured, checking in on the sick, and even helping people grieve their loved ones appropriately.

You weren’t originally living with anyone. In fact, you had been staying at Elfsong for an extended period of time. Around month 3, you had been playing a late set (Being a cleric and Bard for Oghma is a big job) and you hadn’t noticed the man following you back to your room. Thankfully, Astarion had promised to go see your set and had noticed the intruder after you had said good night.

It was safe to say you were shaken and Astarion immediately told you that you A. Did not have a choice and would be taking his second bedroom and B. Need to be significantly more aware. You agreed to both.

He tries desperately hard to return your rent money to you- insisting that he is more than well off enough. You just stare at him silently until he feels so uncomfortable he takes it. You refuse to live in his very nice townhome for free- especially since you know his backstory.

Astarion has his first place, all to himself, and he has allowed you to intrude upon that space because you very nearly died or worse one night. He swear it isn’t an intrusion, but you always worry- it’s one of the few things you are very good at.

Paying rent also prevents you from becoming unrealistic in your expectations of your relationship with him.

It is just a friendship, roomie situation- nothing more, nothing less. You crave more, obviously, he’s everything you’ve ever wanted out of a partner- even the grumbly, more closed off pieces. You’ve stayed up with him through his nightmares and you’ve fallen asleep in each other’s arms more than a few times, but that was just comfort for him.

Right?

“Never have I ever…,” Wyll trails off, obviously very drunk as he leans on his fiancée, Karlach, for support, “had sex!”

The rest of the group groans about how unfair that is, but you aren’t necessarily sure what to do.

You’re a virgin and it’s something you’ve kept pretty close to the chest up until this point. You might as well keep the party rolling.

You barely drink- just enough to pretend- and no one seems the wiser.

Oh, but you are just a silly little drunk fool because of course Astarion notices. You are practically all he seems to notice anymore- or at least that’s what it feels like.

Everything about you pulls him in and he craves you.

Gods does he crave you.

He has to bite back the possessive growl that threatens to tear through his throat as he watches the alcohol not even touch your lips- the sleight of hand may have tricked their companions, but not him.

He adores you and at first it mortified him- now it just consumes him. Astarion loves spending every second he can with you- whether that be reading, cuddling, talking, etc. Maybe another activity could be added to the addendum…

His fangs nip his bottom lip as he tries to snap himself back into reality and not be stuck in the idea of what you would sound like underneath him. It’s especially hard to ignore the fact that he would be the only one who knows what pleasure looks like on your face and in your voice- how your body responds to being teased and worshipped.

“Star! You’re bleeding!”

Shit. I must have bit my lip too hard.

You take your clean napkin and begin to dab away the blood on his lip. The moment your other hand touches his cheek to keep him steady- he feels like he’s melting.

“All better,” you say with a beaming smile.

“Thank you, Darling. I have no idea what I would do without you.”

“I don’t know what he’d do without you,” Tav drunkenly chimes in, Gale facepalms at his wife’s antics, “gosh darn’t- stop spilling your own blood! Worst vampy ever!”

The collective HUSH around the table makes Astarion laugh and Tav looks at him sheepishly.

“Sorry.”

“Oh it is more than fine, my very drunk friend,” Astarion teases, “if anything, I think you need more wine.”

Gale groans, “please don’t encourage her.”

Astarion’s spirit became more and more restless the longer the night out continued. This wasn’t his ideal plan for the night, but he had chickened out at the last minute.

He had initially wanted to take you out on a date- today is your birthday and you didn’t want the whole group to know since you don’t love the attention, but Astarion has taken advantage of the opportunity.

He had already given you the flowers he had “just happened” to find earlier that day and you had been over the moon.

Astarion had also ‘purchased’ a gold bracelet for you- the delicate metal was simple with a single malachite heart charm on it. He learned very, very quickly that you believe in all that ‘crystal nonsense’ as Lae’zel puts it. Astarion’s heart glows a little bit when he catches it reflecting candle light off your wrist. You loved the bracelet equally as much and kissed him on the cheek.

While he isn’t necessarily sure he believes in that crystal nonsense, Astarion does believe in you so the Rhodochrosite bracelet you had bought him shortly after you moved in is almost always on his wrist. You explained that it was meant to heal trauma- he later learned that it more specifically helped with sexual trauma. You never elaborated on it or pestered, but the gesture in itself made him feel accepted and safe.

The first night he opened up to you had also been the first time it hit him that he genuinely has feelings for you. Those feelings have grown naturally and Astarion rarely feels the need to put a mask up when he’s around you anymore. Astarion is as ‘messy’ as he wants because you’d already seen through him and you have continued to hold space for him- grounding him in your atmosphere.

You want him too- of course. Whether you have realized that or not yet- Astarion isn’t sure.

You occasionally let him feed from you (if you don’t have to pull an all-nighter for a Tavern gig) and he can taste your desire in your blood. The shyness and lack of advances on your end make more sense now- you are entirely inexperienced.

It’s absolutely delicious and now Astarion is really kicking himself for not asking if you could both skip meeting with your mutual companions to go out together.

Astarion wanted to ask to take you to dinner. He wasn’t quite sure why that was his first thought considering he can’t eat, but he figured he could drink wine while the two of you talked. His next plan of action was to offer his hand to you as you walked home together, maybe read together for a bit, and then he was hoping that you could be, well, intimate with each other. He genuinely wants to be with you that way and he hopes the feeling is mutual, but that you don’t only see him as a sex object.

Astarion breathes a sigh of relief when the group finally decides to leave the tavern. It may not be the night he envisioned, but it’s quickly amended by the walk home. His idle fingers take up the space between yours and you don’t fight the invasion- instead you smile coyly and a Rosie blush paints your cheeks. He wonders what it would feel like to have your hands entangled in his hair as he-

“Astarion?”

His train of thought is interrupted by his name leaving your lips- your brows furrowed in concern.

“Are you okay? I’ve been asking you if you want to continue to read that book together when we get home, but you seem kind of out of it.”

“Oh!” he manages to choke out, “I- of course, Darling- I would love to continue our book. I apologize, I didn’t realize how lost in thought I had become.”

You open the door of the apartment, a look of concern still adorning your face. You are so adorable and wonderful- he wants to kiss the worry off of your face.

You are discarding your shoes at the door while Astarion goes to locate the bottle of wine he had purchased earlier that day. Reading is fun and all, but Astarion has another idea.

Why not use a childish game to move your relationship forward? It’s not like Astarion has ever claimed to be above that and he could easily pass the idea off as wanting to continue having fun.

“That’s not a book,” you tease, eyeballing the bottle of wine suspiciously, “are you attempting to put me in a stupor and on my birthday nonetheless?”

“Darling,” he says with a gasp, his hand splayed across his chest, “how dare you accuse me of such a thing? I’m positively hurt.”

You merely roll your eyes at him, but happily accept the glass he pours you. As you go to sip- he puts his hand over the top of the glass.

“I was thinking we could continue that debaucherous little game we were all playing earlier,” Astarion says with feigned innocence, “what was it called again? Ever have I? Never have I?”

“Never have I ever?”

Astarion tries not to smile too widely at the way your eyes slightly widen at his words and his enthusiastic nod. He wonders if you realize you’ve been caught.

“Yes! Thank you, Darling- that would have driven me to the brink of insanity,” he says with a chuckle, “in the spirit of good fun, you may go first.”

You give him an unamused look before giving in.

“Never have I ever….. been a VAMPIRE!”

“You wretched little-!”

Astarion scowls, pretending to be irritated as he sips his wine. He narrows his eyes at you and feels his chest bloom with feelings of affection as the mischievous glint in your eye grows brighter.

“Never have I ever… lit a bookshelf on fire.”

Your cheeks burn brightly as you leer at him over the top of your glass. The questions continue to be absurd and personal- questions that the others wouldn’t even begin to think about asking.

Never have I ever read this trashy novel, never have I ever been personally victimized by my roommate buying a ‘stay out’ sign, so on and so forth until Astarion finally feels comfortable enough to use the one ‘never have I ever’ that he’s been sitting on since you both arrived at home.

“Never have I ever lied about having sex.”

The look on your face is priceless. Astarion can’t help but let the thrilled little giggle leave his lips as you stammer over your words.

“Uh- I- hmmmmmmmmm,” you gulp the remaining morsels of wine, “how did you… was it that obvious?”

It’s moments like these where he forgets tact and says the first stupid thing that comes to his brain.

“No, I just made a point of watching.”

Shit.

Your lips purse as a look of satisfaction crosses your face. You wiggle your eyebrows at him before pouring yourself a bit more wine.

“Oh is that so?” you tease, “and why ever would you feel the need to do that?”

Cheeky pup.

“Hmmmm,” he hums, sliding closer to you on the couch, “you could say it may align with an interest of mine?”

The words you are about to say die on your tongue when his fingers begin to trail up under your dress- his eyes find yours in an attempt to ask a silent question.

Your eyes are blown wide with lust, need, and adoration. Your body naturally relaxes under his touch and he can already smell the scent of your budding arousal.

“Wh- what kind of interest?” You whisper, looking at him earnestly.

“Well,” Astarion moves until he’s hovering over you on the couch, he begins leaving a trail of sweet kisses along your jaw, “a tactful, brilliant individual such as myself needed to know for research as you are a subject I have yet to study.”

“And if you were?” you stammer, “given the opportunity, I mean?”

Astarion’s route along your jaw stops abruptly as he looks at you- the nervousness in your voice causing him to doubt his assessment of the situation. He’s surprised to see a hopefulness in your gaze- maybe you do just want sex? Maybe that’s all you want from this at all?

Astarion tries to suppress the disappointment that threatens to pull angry words out of his mouth. If this is what he is to you then he supposes he can live with that.

“Naturally we’d be having sex already, my Dear.”

You are searching his face and your lips are pursed in a thin line.

“I haven’t been… intimate with anyone because I want it to be with someone I really care about,” you say softly, “and I really care about you, Astarion. That’s why I want to make sure that this is what you want- that you care about me in this way too.”

Astarion isn’t really sure what to do with that information. He’s sure the blank stare on his face isn’t helping the situation or your nervousness.

A choked sob gets stuck in his throat- you care for him and you are willing to have sex with him because you care for him. It’s not just because you think he’s ‘pretty’ or fell for all his honeyed words.

“This is what I want, Darling,” he returns your words with equal softness, “I want to be with you in every intimate way imaginable.”

A shock overwhelms his body when you sit up and hesitantly press your lips to his, but he rebounds even faster the moment you start to pull away.

Your lips are soft and warm against his. They are even more wonderful than he could ever imagine. Astarion grinds himself into you- noting how perfectly you fit together with him between your legs. The shakey moan and clash of teeth causes him to smile.

Instead of taking control of the situation, he allows you to guide him. Your inexperienced mouth is clumsy with it’s affections as you learn how to intertwine yourself with him.

The touch and act is affectionate and unhurried, curious and innocent. Astarion feels like a giddy virgin himself as he begins to explore the skin hiding underneath your flimsy dress.

Your arousal is already coating the inside of your thighs, your underwear soaked through, and Astarion nearly loses his composure entirely. He wants to let you take this at your pace, but Gods above that is not going to be an easy feat.

His curious hands find purchase on your hips and at the hem of your underwear- his thumbs dipping underneath the fabric to tease you ever so slightly.

It feels like electricity courses through both of you with each moment of skin contact. You’ve laid next to each other, you’ve fallen asleep in each other’s arms, and overall, you’ve developed a friendship with each other.

You feel made for him and he feels made for you.

You have never felt more confident in a decision in your entire life. Your body sparks to life under his touch and you try to push aside the embarrassment you feel with every whimper and moan that leaves your lips.

You want- no need- more. You want to know him and you want him to know you.

You boldly allow your hands to meet his and you begin to discard your already soaked underclothes- Astarion growls against your neck at the action. His hands grab yours- pinning them above your head and you whine in protest.

“Someone’s eager,” he teases, “are you tired of feeling empty, Little Love? Would you like me to ruin you for anyone else?”

You clench around nothing and shake your head ‘yes desperately in response. Astarion clicks his tongue and smiles devilishly.

“That’s not an answer, Darling.”

“Please.”

He lifts an eyebrow expectantly and you huff in frustration- looking away from him. One of his hands guides your eyes back to his and his thumb gently glides along your lower lip, coaxing a needy whimper from you.

You feel so embarrassed- trying to express what you need, but maybe he finds it enduring? Or at least you hope he does.

“Will you please make love to me, Astarion?”

Astarion’s face looks like the definition of happiness as he smiles down upon you- for a creature of the night, he sure is capable of beaming like the sun.

The offending article of clothing is removed and tossed somewhere across the living room as Astarion settles his face in between your legs.

“Well since you asked so nicely,” he says teasingly while nipping at the sensitive skin of your inner thighs.

He takes his sweet time kissing and cleaning up the nectar that coats your legs, your growing need making you more and more impatient as you writhe under his touch. Astarion makes a point of avoiding your wanting heat- tears pricking your eyes as you become more and more overstimulated.

“You are so, so beautiful,” he breathes against your skin, “so beautiful and good.”

“Astarion, please.”

The desperation in your voice pulls a hum of pleasure from Astarion as he presses one more kiss on the inside of your thigh. You open your mouth to beg again- to ask for literally any contact- when you feel his cold tongue lick all the way up your folds, circling your sensitive clit, before latching his lips to the bundle of nerves.

You keen- loudly- at the sudden attention on your clit and Astarion has seemed to quickly find that perfect spot- teasing it with his tongue as your back arches and your hips press into his face.

Astarion’s fingers push your hips down, locking you in place against the couch, and you feel another shudder of arousal go through you when you think about the bruises that are bound to be on your hips in the morning.

Astarion’s expert tongue circles and teases at your clit- occasionally taking a detour to taste you, lapping up every part of your essence.

He feels like he’s starving as he devours you with his tongue- if he could have it his way, he would never stop.

You are so wet for him that the couch underneath you is soaked and your dress surely isn’t much better off. Your moans and whimpers cause his cock to strain painfully against the front of his pants.

He decides to kiss back up your body, ripping open the lacy fabric of your dress. The Gods must be real because it’s a damn miracle that you aren’t wearing a bra.

Thankfully you don’t seem to be too worried about the state of your dress.

Astarion greedily sucks one of your nipples between his teeth while the other is rolled between his thumb and index finger.

He wants to consume you and you want to be consumed.

Your fingers find purchase in his hair and you have his mouth on yours within seconds. His other hand returns to your now neglected breast. You cry out against his mouth with each pinch of his fingers and your pleasure has begun to soak through the front of his own pants. He’s certain he’s created his own mess anyway.

Admittedly, he’s been thinking about playing with your breasts all week. You loudly complained about how sore they felt since your moon blood was coming next week. Astarion has been thinking about every delicious way to massage the soreness away since.

His hips grind into your exposed cunt- snaking one of his hands inbetween the two of you, he begrudgingly replaces the pressure of his clothed cock by sliding a finger inside of you.

He adores how your back arches underneath him and the way his name falls off your lips like a prayer. Your heels are digging into his back and your head is thrown back as you keen with each movement of his finger. Astarion curls his fingers upward and focuses on the perfect spot- your toes curl with the sensation and your moans become higher in pitch.

The second one meets some resistance and he’s almost positive a third finger is going to be needed before you are ready, but you clench around his hips, grabbing his attention.

“Astarion- I need you inside me please,” you beg him.

Whatever resolve he had to make sure you were 100 percent ready has broken with that simple sentence. He’s pulling you up off the couch and into his arms- practically racing to throw you on the bed in his room.

To be entirely honest- Astarion can’t even remember if he was actually wearing any clothes considering how quickly he pulls them off.

Astarion has you laid across his bed- ready and wanting for him. You are positively exquisite.

Your shy eyes and body try to hide from him- your arms coming to cover your breasts and your eyes looking away from him. You are suddenly very aware of the lack of clothing and Astarion- well- he looks like an angel.

You drink in his silhouette while avoiding his eyes and you feel yourself clench around nothing at the sight of his cock- hard and dripping with precum because of you. You. The silly, awkward virgin that has never been in a relationship before.

Eager hands are entangling themselves with yours and Astarion’s suddenly on top of you again with your arms pinned away from your face.

“Look at me.”

The command sends a wave of desire through you- Astarion’s voice is thick with arousal and you forget to breathe when you finally look at him.

Astarion has been all sharp edges and mischief since you’ve met him, but right now?

His eyes are soft and inviting- akin to warm crimson bed sheets rather than blood weeping from a cut. Astarion’s lips are slightly parted as he tries to commit your face to memory. His usually perfect hair is mussed up from all the attention you’ve given it.

“I am certain the Gods have sent you to destroy me,” he murmurs in awe before pressing a kiss to your forehead, “tell me if I need to be more gentle, my Love.”

Astarion lines himself up with your entrance and you wrap your legs around his waist. He gently pushes himself inside of you, giving a little bit more every time until his hips are flush against yours. The further he goes, the more his train of thought disappears.

You feel wonderful and the whimpers that leave your mouth with every inch more he gives you makes him moan loudly into the crook of your neck. He kisses up and along your jaw, praising you for taking him so well.

You have never felt more full in your entire life- it feels… right. Like your body has been made to fit with Astarion’s. The light rocking movement of his hips works to ease the initial discomfort of adjusting to his size, but you already feel like you need more. You want to be lost in this moment with him- you want to know and feel everything.

It’s as if he reads your mind as he pace begins to pick up, his thrusts begin to get longer and more drawn out. The tears that were initially pricking your eyes have disappeared entirely in favor of desperate, borderline embarrassing, wanting moans.

“You feel so incredible, Darling,” Astarion whines as thrusts into you, “you are being so good for me.”

His eyes meet yours and he slows his motions ever so slightly- your body protests at the loss of friction, but Astarion’s lips gently coaxing gasps from yours distracts your body from the lack of motion.

The world surrounding you feels absolutely nonexistent as Astarion kisses you deeply. One of his hands finds purchase in your hair and deepens the kiss even more. You feel as if you could float away from the onslaught of affection as you return his affections with equal fervor.

Astarion pulls himself almost entirely out of you before snapping his hips- rutting himself back into you. Your lips leave his, favoring a shape fit for a breathy cry of pleasure.

He finds your eyes again in the haze of his own euphoria. This is a dream to him- a wonderful, beautiful dream.

“I adore you,” you whisper against his lips.

Astarion smiles giddily.

“And I, you.”

Astarion loses his composure as he picks up his pace again- you clench around him, your already tight heat engulfing him even more with each movement of his hips. Your orgasm runs through you- your legs are shaking around him as your grip around his hips begins to give.

Astarion supports the lower half of your body, groping your ass as he chases his own little death.

“I need you to cum inside me, Astarion,” you say wistfully, “cum for me please.”

That’s all it takes to drive him over the edge entirely- no longer able to hold on anymore as his seed pours inside of you. Astarion buries his face in the crook of your neck as he let’s the feeling of pleasure wash over him.

You smell of sex and your favorite soap, which has coincidentally become his favorite soap, and he sighs happily when you start lazily tracing circles along his shoulders. You’ve done this for him before, in a more clothed setting, but it’s a thousand times better when he’s able to feel all of you against him.

Astarion can’t remember the last time he had sex with someone and felt like he was comfortable in their arms. Honestly, he’s more than comfortable with you and yes, that does terrify him.

He just had the best sexual experience of his life and yet he is still terrified because he doesn’t want you to leave or decide this is all he’s good for.

“Starry?”

He hums in response.

“Are you okay?” you ask in a whisper, “you got really tense just now.”

Astarion is quick to look at you when you ask that question. Your eyes are curious and your brow is furrowed. He really can’t hide anything from you. Astarion rolls over onto his back- not wanting you to see how scared and already heartbroken he is. He honestly isn’t sure what he would do if he stopped meaning anything to you- anything of value anyway.

“I… I don’t want…,” he struggles to get the words out, “I- this has been probably the single best sexual escapade that I have ever had, my Love. My only hope is that… you don’t only see me for, well, sex after tonight.”

He’s surprised when you crawl over to him, straddle him, and then put his face between your hands. The serious look in your eyes worries him- did he upset you? Offend you? Are you going to-

“I want you to throw that thought away right now and if you can’t- then I will assure you everyday before it goes away,” you say firmly, “I’ve fallen for you- all of you- over these several months. I think you are the smartest, most interesting, and funniest man I have ever met. I look forward to coming home to you and I hate leaving in the mornings.

“I… you are all I have ever wanted out of a partner or even just a person, Astarion. I choose you- I choose you everyday- in whatever way you’ll have me.”

All Astarion does is cry in response. He doesn’t mean to and of course he wishes he would stop.

I’ve known you for 200 years. Haven’t I suffered enough?

I choose you- I choose you everyday.

You hold him while he cries and Astarion lets himself soak up the feeling of safety- truly believing it this time. You want him for him and you will never know how much that means, but Astarion always will.

When he’s done crying, he kisses you gently sitting you both up against the headboard with you still on his lap. Astarion runs circles into your thighs as you lay your head on his chest and his head rests against yours. You remain there together for a while before you finally break the silence.

“Do you want to talk about it Star?”

Astarion thinks for a moment.

“I- no,” he says hesitantly, “not right now- I just want to enjoy this moment with you, my Dear.”

You hum in response and then look around the room. Your eyes spot something that causes you to sport the cheekiest grin Astarion has ever seen.

“You didn’t finish your wine.”

He looks over and then back to you with an eyebrow raised.

“I suppose I did not. Why-“

“Never have I ever had sex with someone on their birthday.”

A pregnant pause envelopes the space between you- Astarion blinks at you a few times in astonishment and then reaches for the wine glass- a loving smile on his face.

He’s grateful- you never push him and you don’t force him to continue talking about difficult subjects once he’s calmed down. Perhaps he’s even more grateful that he may be able to spend a lifetime with you, if he plays his cards right. Gods, he hopes he plays his cards right. Astarion is not much of a planner after all.

“You’re lucky I adore you.”

“I know.”

[sencubussubs]

My University Success Story

Hi lovelies,

Here is my university success story which isn’t just “i manifested it and i got in” (which is still super great btw but i think this success story is a good reminder of how irrelevant the 3D and logic is). I initially got rejected!

Well my university system is different so i didn’t get rejected but rather i performed so badly that i got an extremely high ranking number (700+ high). (lowest ranking numbers get in)

At the time my manifestation journey was um.. not great. I was especially dealing with an sp manifestation that i kept spiraling over and over and i basically was losing all hope in my manifestations in general. (i kept successfully manifesting contact and then driving myself crazy) I was SO absorbed in the 3D and let it control everything. i treated the 3d as my only validation, i wavered constantly, i went in and out of believing despite the fact that i had consciously manifested SO MANY THINGS, i am talking an ipad pro 4th gen and apple pen, my iphone 13 green (the one from my ‘don’t settle’ post.) Like i was making everything SO difficult for myself.

When i got rejected from this university, i was honestly a little gobsmacked and just done with everything. I was preparing my stuff for my back up uni that i was dreading to go to, i was doing room viewings & everything. I was so done with it i just decided i was going to get into my uni because i internally REFUSED to go to my back up uni or not go to uni at all. At the time i didn’t know manifestation was as could be as easy as deciding. But by deciding and refusing to budge internally, as well as having one of the uni’s lecture hall (that i actually have every single one of my lectures in now!) pictured on my vision board, the 3D moved for me what it had to move to reflect my internal shift. And two weeks later, about a month after rejecting me, they accepted me.

Everyone was surprised because with my ranking there was absolutely 0 reason for me to be accepted, even if other students dropped out for their other options. The course is too small and selective for my ranking number to ever come close to letting me fill a spot. I performed badly on my mocks and even worse on my final exams - the predicted grades they had rejected me with were significantly higher. I have no connections to the university, nothing. Despite every logical reason for me not to get into my course - including literally being rejected - here i am. I am currently at the start of my second semester at the uni :)

With this success story i wish to remind you how logic and the 3D/ circumstances have no part in manifestation. I internally refused to accept the outcome the 3D was showing me and stayed faithful to my outcome - i didn’t even know this was manifesting at the time, i was just being stubborn - and as a result it manifested.

My 3D kept showing me a different outcome, every weekend i was visiting rooms on the other side of the country for my back up uni choice, my mom was constantly talking to me about the back up university, other people were constantly bringing it up - and still here i am.

You don’t need to know why and how it is going to work out, just stay faithful to your outcome. In some cases it’ll come naturally, some manifestations just come out of thin air like this one.

I believe in you, now choose to believe in yourself too.

Choose to remain disciplined and faithful to yourself.

Love,

Saph

[asterythm]

on the ending of in stars and time:

an essay from someone who couldn’t sit with it at first, & a love letter to the fic that brought me here anyway. (…spoiler warning for in stars and time, naturally, but you knew that!)

if siffrin isat has taught me one thing it's that vulnerability is cool, actually, and being forthcoming and generous with love when there is love to be shared is how the coolest kids do it.

so. hello isat nation of tumblr dot com. i'm here because even after cutting out several chunks to shorten this significantly, i busted through the ao3 comment section character limit and still had more to say, so i needed somewhere to put it all that would let me go longer.

i’m pretty sure this post is for, like, three people, one of whom is me. but look, it’s been moved here to the webbed site so if you wanna read it anyway i won’t stop you!

=====

i think what it is, ultimately, is this: the ISAT canon ending was beautiful. it was an objectively well-written ending with so much love and hope and thematic satisfaction.

it also left me, for a period, with a deep and unshakeable sense of dread.

:)!!!!

now enter @faedemon's "None Forward & Two, Two, Two Steps Back" (hiya, fancy seeing you here), a two-chapter alt act 5 in which siffrin finds a New, Worse way to break the loops.

despite being, as mentioned, a notably worse outcome for everyone involved, this alt end managed to cut straight to the heart of that dread and settle it — and not in the sense of "oh, i like this alt ending better", or “oh, the canon ending looks better in comparison against this worse alt ending”, so much as "oh, thanks to this alt ending i am finally able to sit in a place where it no longer feels like the canon ending, as a beautiful outcome which felt impossibly lucky to get, is the only outcome in which life can go on — and my ability to accept it, and the game as a whole, is elevated for it."

which!! i mean!! i don’t know that that’s exactly what you set out to do; None Forward is explicitly a tragedy!! and one, as your tags say, written because the canon ending didn't ring true for you.

but I realized that the thing that was stopping me from enjoying ISAT’s canon ending was that ugly hard core that was still so, so scared after the canon ending of every way we (that is, siffrin + i as the player moving in that incredible ludonarrative lockstep with him, holy moly the harmony in this game) had not yet grown to earn it. 

=====

(I’ll take a sec here under the cut to say that when I played ISAT, and then for much of the month that followed, my main reason for engaging with it and its related content at all was that it was a piece of media that came fervently recommended by my incredibly dear friend @iconocat , who it had massively, violently impacted and whose media recommendations in general I trust more than anything.

so i played ISAT, and it was incredible. but even though it's a piece of media that just about hit on every point on my list of Things That Set My Brain On Fire, it failed somehow to. well. set me on fire — at least to the extent I was expecting it to. I still enjoyed myself in the few weeks afterwards of running through fan content and intentionally plunging myself into media analysis, but I was never convinced that I would be engaging with ISAT to the extent I was if it wasn't for the sake of trying to intentionally hack my brain to the point where I could share with my friend something so important to her at the same level of genuine investment. 

I’m telling you all this because, legitimately the same night I posted “nothing but a dull ache” (ie, if you're not charlie faedemon and are somehow caring to read this anyway, the epilogue oneshot I started feverishly writing the morning after reading None Forward), I realized through my rambling in my friend’s discord dms that reading None Forward was the moment the fire finally caught. I spent a month burying myself in ISAT content and asking myself “Is this natural yet?”. after None Forward, the answer to that question finally became a sure, wholehearted yes.)

=====

so anyway, back to the essay.

don't get me wrong. it's really, really nice, to read a story where the moral is less “you should have asked for help", and more “there are people who will unselfishly give the gift of a love that saves even when you cannot save yourself".

but that whole ending also was only able to happen because 1. they broke in a way no one should ever have to break, and 2. everyone involved got lucky.

which, in media, happens all the time!! it is not inherently dissatisfying for a narrative to wrap by saving you with luck and love in the nick of time!! in fact it should be incredibly satisfying, after the unambiguously-negative downward spiral into Director Siffrin who had begun to learn what to say and do to make his family behave exactly the way he needs them to, for a stroke of unpredictable luck brought about by factors entirely out of his control to finally be what sets him free.

but like... I think it's because the story is set in a situation where it's no longer true that luck and randomness is a factor by which anything significant can change.

we're hammered over the head with it: until and unless you do something to alter the course of events, they will not be altered. when you are the only dynamic element the world is reacting to in an otherwise looping course of events, you don't get to rely, anymore, on the idea that at any moment something could happen to save you. you have to assume that nothing will happen unless you make it.

and siffrin?? siffrin's literal motto was "stick to the script"!! they spend the loops with a mouth that kept closing tighter and tighter and tighter until i got to act 5 and watched them implode. and then I’m saved, and I know I haven't earned this. I get to the end and I'm still not telling them anything!! I wasn't supposed to get the good ending!! but I get away with it anyway with open arms and acceptance and unconditional love, and it's. kind of nauseating?

how am I ever supposed to learn and grow, if I didn't manage to change my behaviour even then under the threat of Eternal Looping Torment, and still got the good ending anyway? how can I prove there was an alternative way I could have broken free if things hadn't turned out so lucky in that one terrible act 5 loop?

I can't. and that's terrifying.

(aside: I’m speaking in the first person here to emphasize that the thing that got in my way is not because I don't believe siffrin is deserving of this love — quite the opposite, I think the driving force behind the good ending is that siffrin went scorched earth and saw he was loved anyway — but because this is a game designed to frequently encourage the player to deeply feel what siffrin is feeling throughout its course and. well. as a thing to happen to a fictional character it's beautiful. as a takeaway for the player, it's... harder.)

and that's where None Forward comes in. (i’ve already written thousands of words in comments and epilogue fic declaring my love by now, but i mean. im hoping you won’t mind just a liiiittle more.)

None Forward shows a devastatingly written, all-too-believable version of what might have happened if siffrin didn't get lucky, and the loops continued, and they kept clinging to the script and refusing to Look At It and successfully stagnating and stagnating and stagnating as they were so determined to do. and it's bad, it's worse, it's way way worse — but there's no reliance on outside factors. it comes completely from within siffrin and loop, the only dynamic pieces in the world, finally breaking out.

it was the terrible, nightmarish unfairness of the loops brought to their natural, just-south-of-inevitable conclusion.

and yes, it's a terrible, unfair conclusion, but the loop still breaks.

in a roundabout way, it... gives me so much hope. if the outside factors were different, if the stars did not align just right to allow siffrin's family to get there on time to save them, if siffrin never learned to open their mouth, which by all means seems like the likeliest course of events... they'd still get out. worse for wear, and separated by a gap unbridgeable, but out.

there is a future. there is freedom.

=====

to speak more specifically on dull ache, if you'll forgive the indulgence, just since this was originally meant to be in a reply to the author in my own comments section:

I think I so desperately needed to write it with a focus on the family siffrin left behind because I wanted to prove, if just for myself, that in that barely-dodged alternative there still could be a future for everyone. (isabeau's just happened to be the voice in which dull ache came to me, but the point was to create an epilogue for all four.)

for the rest of the family, who was not quite so deeply ravaged but was still left in a bad way at the end of None Forward, and for whom randomness is not pretty much unequivocally good just by virtue of being better than the alternative like it is for siffrin and loop (more on that in a sec), I could see it mattering more to set specific pieces up precisely, and I could actually imagine the pieces I could set up that could have a meaningful impact in the immediate future.

so. y’know. I set them, in the way I happened to want to. granted, with some extra... divine indulgence, but siffrin's departure from their family's perspective at the end of None Forward was definitely Wrong but not so obviously wrong that I could believe that without it they wouldn't otherwise either (a) go hunting him down to force out the truth, which felt Worse, or (b) just "accept" that it was as simple as Siffrin not actually caring about them/brushing them off and thus intentionally fade him into the distance in their minds to deal with it. which felt like the WORST POSSIBLE THING.

you'd think it might make more sense to have done this for siffrin and loop, instead. they're arguably the ones who need it most, after all, so why not build them up from rock bottom as a sweeping show of "things get better"?

but... i think it doesn't need to be written to have faith that it will happen: the very fact that Siffrin is about to set out on a new journey in a reality where everything is a dynamic player just. immediately gives me hope all by itself. random lucky things that save you are so much more believable and wonderful when random lucky things in general are happening all the time, and you have all the time in the world for them to happen.

and anyway, I don't think this is the kind of future you’d write satisfyingly as a sequence of events at all. to heal from this is something that will take an incredible amount of time and nonlinear progress. 

until one day, through a series of disconnected small quiet gloriously-random lived experiences, without knowing when it happened or being able to trace it back, you realize, oh —

somewhere along the way, you came to know how to live again.