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was looking to see if Godzilla Minus One was added to canadian netflix (it was!) and scrolling by this unfamiliar promo image acted as a minor jumpscare
i, like the rest of us, am the most normal Saw fan
#i regret to inform i think i now have a near photographic memory of every frame of most saw films#i didnt know it would get like this but yknow. it happens#“im so normal” i say to myself as i check both the unrated and theatrical cut for this exact frame to be extra sure#its def a promo still#saw#jennilargh#also can i just say since my delving into horror. my netflix recommended sections are absolutely obliterated#never will i see regular films there again i think
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can a girl ramble aboutthe way you can interpret so many parts of the propaganda and characterization of rhine by other the people/general populace of teyvat as people largely antagonizing neurodivergent traits without being chased with pitchforks and torches.
#FUCKKKK DSOMMEBODY HEAR ME.#YES. i know shes a not a good person.#but half the shit she's described with by other sources#is so obviouslye exaggerated based onwho she is and NOBODDIESSSS talking abt it#'cold and unfeeling' MY ASS. THIS WOMAN WAS TALKING ABOUT EATING MOLD FOR A GOOD FOUR PARAGRAPHS ITSNOT THAT DEEP#the way she clearly a ton of albedo's behaviours but i dont see anybodyyyyy talk about it and just demonize her for it#THE HEXENSUCCESORS ARE ALL PARELLELS TO THE HEXENLADIES. THATS THE POINT#THE FACT RHINE LARGELY MIRRORS ALBEDO IS NOT A COINCEDENCE OR WEIRD INTERPRETATION ON ANYONES END.#the fact many of the trait she CLEARLY shares with albedo are demonized... HELLO..............#mond propaganda book writer gets shot IMMEDIATELY#-> i dont know guys. Maybe its also the fact she's probably traumatized from the. yknow. CATACLYSM. that made her a worse than albed#just maybe!#its sooo established that neurodivergence leads people to cope with stress different... Hello............ can we talk about this.........#NO HATE. but if I wathced my nation got destroyed > and this loser twink knight said i should've protected everyone/ when even HE DIDNT/#i wouldd also spiral. AND THATS CLEARLY WAHT HAPPENED ON SOME LEVEL.#if you read her hexenbook excerpt she is. quite literallh just sarcastic. blunt. and not emotionally experessive#WHICH ALIGNS WITH THE EXAGGREATED TRAITS SHES LATER CHARACTERIZED AS???#she literally JUST got worse symptoms as a result of trauma. why are we playing it up like this. “Great Sinner” my ass she's a woman ins te#they're all sinenrs if you really think about it. THEYRE IN STEM#-> the way neurodivergent women are demonized for sooo many traits they have just because it doesn't fit the mold of being a 'good women'#NOBODY IS TALKING ABOUT THIS. ITS MOND#THEYRE NOTABLY. NOT ALWAYS DOING THE BEST. WITH FREEDOM AND GOOD OPINIONS BC OF VENTI'S ABSENCESSSSSSSSSSSSS#NOSHIT THIS TAKE WOULD COME FROM THEM..... MAKE SOME SENSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE#this is no hate because i love mond with alll my heart im just fucking insane over this. venti i love you#crepe rants
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post ankle-twisting clarity
#i slipped in the mudddddd the other day LOL i twisted my one ankle and scraped up my other knee#so the past few days ive just been kind of needing to waddle around.....#LUCKILY its healing well and fast <3 but yknow i was like#so stressed out over shit that doesnt matter in school. and like this is an awful unintentional habit i have but i will get like#overly stressed over shit and then i'll start getting SUPER careless with everything. and then i'll injure myself foolishly and Calm Down#happened last year with my foolish midnight woodcarving incident LOL its always november....#BUT yeah luckily this years foolish injury is a quick one at least!!#but yeah like genuinely i was so stressed out about all my fine arts major shit. teachers have been really getting on my case recently#my main professor said that it was a good thing people get so riled up with my work because it means its impactful#tbh i didnt believe her at all i thought she was just trying to placate me but then i listened closely to the things faculty say when#they look at my fucking. cartoon wolf drawing or something and i think. she might be right actually. people keep getting frustrated with me#because i think they see a lot of potential in me but i basically only have to drive to draw cartoon wolves etc HFKJSDHJVKRFEds#which is great for my ego. maybe too good for my ego. that my mark making and colour use etc is so evocative to these industry and#instutition people. but on the other hand i was told like thrice now that my work has no place in a gallery. which is fine although im not#totally sure how true that is. but also afterwards one time i was suggested to go into animation instead which is. um.#so its not out of nowhere i mean i did want to be an animator when i was like 10 but if you know anything about the current state of the#animation industry its like genuinely wild to tell someone who you've only seen 2 dimensional watercolour and acrylic painted#sketchy lined drawings from and who has said they cant do digital art anymore that they should get an animation degree?#brother they would kill me. i would be killed. i had an inkling but it really made me notice so clearly how limited the experiences my#faculty kind of have with certain industries. which is fine. or maybe not. for a professor LOL but yknow. but i was like huh. i guess i can#just kind of chill lol if i just keep doing things maybe something will come of it. i may not get as much help in my artistic development#rn as i would like. but its chill i think i'll figure it out if i just keep doing stuff <3#doesnt really matter that my teachers dont know what to do with me. my kneeeee has a booboo so i am CHILLING out :)
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hahaha hey you guys guess what. you'll never believe it. got the guy who's in charge of my fraud case on the phone and he was like "who'd you give one-time security codes to yesterday" and i was like "the guy who called me from the fraud department after they noticed a weird login in florida??" and he was like "that was the fuckin hacker. you got got. IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!" i handed my entire savings over to a fucking guy on the phone on a silver platter. like some kind of fuckin rube. bro
#IT IS OK THOUGH I HAVE BEEN SORTING IT OUT#account is LOCKED DOWN! card is DELETED! fraud paperwork has been FILED! i have requested a fraud alert AND credit freeze#from the NATIONAL CREDIT BUREAU!#a friend of mine is taking me to MAINE next saturday to go to the BANK! i sent an email to my landlord asking if i can pay rent by CHECK!#i went to my other bank and deposited my BONDS! so i have some MONEY! to pay RENT!#i also got a new debit card from them. and made sure i could use my old checks.#i also bought some STAMPS while i was out and a BIRTHDAY PRESENT for a FRIEND#now i am going to start switching over some auto deposits#so when i get my paycheck on tuesday i will actually get it.#i feel so STUPID but i think i have done all i can to fix this. i am feeling better about it#by next weekend i will have my money again. it's all fine#and hopefully next time i will not get got so easily. lol.#anyway dont get got by people pretending to be your bank i guess. i did think it was weird how many questions they asked but..#they ALWAYS ask lots of questions at the bank!!!!!#i got a text message FROM the bank saying they would be calling me soon and then the next call was from the scammer#and then like a half hour later got one from the bank and was confused bc they'd just 'called me'#anyway. it'll be fine. scary for a while but at least i have things i can do to make it better. it's all good#genuinely feeling like i ought to take out like a thousand bucks cash and keep it in my desk to replace my bonds tho tbh hahah#just in case something like this happens again. you never know. what would i have done if i DIDNT have those yknow#ok thank u all for being along on this journey with me
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Where else am I gonna rant if not to a group of random strangers that barely know me, right? So ofc I'm gonna rant here cuz these people have no idea who tf I am.
....turns out I have no words to explain how I'm feeling right now so I offer this emoji instead: 😔
#so i went to this 18th birthday aka debut of my friend and tbh its the first debut ive ever been to and i was rly looking forward to it#plan was to enjoy with my friends and all and i was also planning to get some ideas for my own debut whoch is two weeks after hers#tbh my debut is the bday that ive been looking forward to for basically my whole life cuz the other important ages i did absolutely nothing#for my first bday i was literally in the hospital so nothing there. in my seventh bday i cant even remember what happened. we went swimming?#so the 18th is what i always dreamt of. ive already told my moms this a couple hundred times and ive already thought out how i want it to go#then at the party i observed everything and i realized a lot of things. firstly that shit is expensive. while we used to have the money#no we dont and thats all just in the past now. second thing which i find the most disturbing is the amount of people#the debutante invites the special people in their life and while yes i do have those i dont think they can even reach the proper number#and also i rly cant see myself in that position yknow? being the center of atteaction with people telling you nice stuff abt how they like u#so thats made me quite sad that the bday ive always wanted is never gonna be mine. my biggest TOTGA...#at this point i just wanna spend my whole 18th wallowing in self pity and sadness. while i know my friends love me i dont rly think they#love me to the point of throwing me a lil party of our own like we did earlier this year to ine of our friends. im the spare friend i guess#and plus when i got home my paretns arent even talking to me or looking my way if not scolding me or getting mad at me#well IM SORRY i also didnt want to get stuck in the fckin road for A WHOLE HOUR while waiting for a ride home#and IM SORRY that im just wearing jeans to a debut. this is my frist fucking time going to a debut so how tf would i know???#plus a lot of people were just wearing casual so wtf 😒#all in all im sad and i want to go die
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I never tried the option myself bc it'd probably mean skipping the Reason You Suck speech at the end (fire for speedrunners though) but I Love that you can frame your Phoneys in 3, especially so if you've already killed the previous two. Like yeah couldn't send you off to die so i'll let the goverment do it for me 🧸 like its just Peak evil imo.
#luly talks#i do relinquish in the pain and the agony but dont get me wrong the thought of any of them 3 getting jailed makes me SO sad#rog esp since he's the one im writing about and the biggest nerve wreck#gingi voice they'll be the last one to pick the board game for prison-game-night..........#actually yknow i wonder if rog would end up almost believing it after all when you try to gaslight him for the shits and giggles#(as in: telling HE was victim of the bite of 87 and the like) he tells you to not do that bc his brain is already scrambled or something#so there's a chance perhaps he'd believe it if he had everyone constantly accussing him of it?#not like it'd matter much i have no hopes for the dsaf justice system i know its been 35 years since jack got framed but still#i just remembered when the option popped up i said ''god im really becoming steven 😭''#first time i made the joke too was when i said ''imagine your boss sucks so bad you turn suicidal'' no clue what the context was#OH YEAH JAKE SAYING HE'D RATHER FUCKING DIE THAN KEEP WORKING HERE yeah. poor guy.#anyway im derailing my own post again uhhh. yeah. yeah i dont trust any phoney is avoiding the death sentence#dsaf#roger jones#dsaf roger#btw just for the sake of yapping longer i truly cant decide whether harry or jake would survive better in the enviroment#probably jake to be honest. I mean Harry has a lot of experience inside freddy's but he didnt really live outside it muhc#jake is so confrontational though#hey did you guys watch the hit movie felon? sure that guy wasn't framed but. i feel like jake would end up w that attitude#except for. you know. everything else that happens in the hit movie felon.#hey actually forget about this game go watch the 10/10 movie Felon from 2008 starring Val Kilmer and Stephen Dorff#because its one of my all time fave movies and probably the saddest i've seen#not bc there arent movies that are more tragic but bc no movie was able to break thru my walls of idgaf and make me cry anyway#yeah you thought i couldnt bring up my movie fixations on my different fandom posts well you were WRONG in fact#im gonna go tag my other post i left untagged yesterday bc my ass was Cooking
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currently taking -1hp psychic damage from hyperfixation
#okay to reblog#i fully did this to myself i just didnt realize how thoroughly i've painted myself into a corner#i started a durge playthrough of bg3 but since i had have two saves (mercury my solo + shrike who is co-op)#i decided i would use an existing oc i've written for for 13 years#seems logical - i already have his personality and a basic idea of how he'd deal with the durge's tendencies#since in his own canon he struggles in a similar way of not totally being in control of his actions#and has become a puppet to a being that wants to steal his mind to cause discord + strife#and he can easily be slotted into a warlock since in his own canon he made an 'agreement' with#well basically one of the gods of the land for protection#also part of my choice to use him in my third playthrough was pettiness for astarion also having curly white hair#because they unfortunately look similar and i have to live with that#but yknow whatever i was like this is a low commitment playthrough just to explore the durge storyline#and it's easier to use Silent here since his own existing story already has keynotes that would probably overlap#BUT THE PROBLEM IS#IM DRIVING MYSELF INSANE#i need locked in a room with a giant conspiracy board#i cant even share my thoughts because i'd have to first explain who Silent is and what his deal is in canon#and then from there I'd be able to talk about the parallels or the way some of the stuff that's happened in bg3 has already fucked him up#like what was i honestly expecting when i made this choice#i don't know how or why i Thought using one of my longest existing ocs would mean i could get through this playthrough low effort#i have cursed myself to be thinking about it x2 as often because it's both the game im obsessed with and my main mascot Silent#and the worst part is i keep violently swinging from thinking about Silent in bg3 to Silent just In General#so I simultaneously need to see and do things with him in this new setting while dying to tell everyone about him in his natural setting#i'm dying#silent speaks#yes i'm called Silent and he's also called Silent#no he's not a persona/self insert it's like a branding thing
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Scheming…
#chattin#taking time to draw and write out a relationship/dynamics chart for the thieves and assorted friends#bc theres. alot. and it would be nice to write it out. it would help establish my thoughts about them#its not poly/thieves but its. kind of adjacent to it. but its less shippy and more focused on how they interact-#-and behave with one another. like theyre kinda bonded together over everything. lines get a little blurred but its what works for them#and i think lumping them all together as poly/thieves is a shortcut for breaking down their character#like obv akira has diff relationships for everyone; but how do THOSE people react to others ??#like pego/ryu is real and true but also ann is absolutely there. u cannot separate them.#theyre the shujin delinquents to me LOL. they are too tightly bound together to let any external relationship split them at this point#akiras not w goro; its akira AND ryuji w goro. like akira and goro would just not work; but ryuji make its work well yknow?#goro doesnt get third wheeled w ann and vice versa bc ann and goro are good friends; they just hang :)#its like. if u could SEE the fucking string of connections making a mess of my white board in my minds eye…😭#so im trying to write it down into something that works for me#i dunno. i think its fun :) i did this for ffxv too#only that was way easier bc its just the four of them. but like. how do their internal relationships affect the overall polycule ?#anyway. inspired by that love post; that theres diff kinds of love. and kiss ryuji week LOL#bc i wanted to write a small thing with different thieves for each prompt#and im like how would their relationships differ from one another ?#ryuji and akira but also ryuji with makoto. ryuji w haru. ryuji w yusuke. its like.#u cant use the same thing from most pego/ryu fics bc they DIDNT meet the same way#waugh.#rambling#just know that im insane. i have all these wips and nothing FINISHED. waaa.#this is what that post meant about being obsessed over bad media LMAO. this is just what happens#u stay up thinking about fake polycules from a game that came out seven years ago#i think….#WHAT. 2016???#EIGHT years ???#funny bc i was thinking about how ffxv was eight yesrs old and i am still a mess over it#well. could u imagine if i played p5 when it LAUNCHED instead of in 2020???
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maybe if i go back on antidepressants ill ask for wellbutrin
#p#like yes i am pretty depressed rn but i dont feel like killing myself like i did when i was on viibryd#no genetic altercations my ass i was on that shit for years and just now looking back at my messages and notes no wonder i was scaring ppl#i was so anxious one time i had to sit in my brothers room so i knew he wasnt going to die suddenly#and i was so so so scared but it was like there was a mental block where it couldnt become a panic attack jst paranoia#but i was one degree from it. just imagining what i did to him happening to me scared me to death and i had to reassure myself#my mom asked me abt it the other day like 'hmmm. wouldve been nice to let me know you werent on it anymore. seems like a thing your mother-#'-should know.' and like yes since im still completely dependent on her in all aspects but man#i didnt want to explain i had no interest in seeing lisa anymore and i was just done. i was so tired of my lows being so fucking low#and not even noticing they were so bad yknow#do i even know how to be honest anymore. no i dont think of killing myself but i dont see a future for myself either#i have no goals no motivation no nothing#its selfish to want to die but its like that mytoecold dude video where hes like 'if i spilled milk and then killed myself technically-#'-the problem would be gone' like yeah. that is true. how do i get that out of my belief system#he was a raging addict btw i just saw that video. crazy and sad but i guess when you are dealt a bad hand you see eye to eye
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I was on the wikipedia page for phobias just for fun but just discovered theres an actual word for a fear of being touched.. 🥹
#haphephobia.... and they list guts from berserk under pop culture references 😢😢😭😭 thats my guy....#not gonna lie i teared up a bit i didnt realise it 'counted' as an actual phobia#i find it really difficult to talk abt but i have a complicated relationship w touch/physical contact (likely trauma babeyy)#and while i do crave it a lot i also have a very physical reflexive fear response especially if its intentional + i dont expect it#which can sometimes even get triggered just being in proximity to ppl bc like. even the possibility sets me on fucking edge#it would be nice to be as physically affectionate as i naturally want to be without dealing w my fight/flight/freeze but alas#its weird bc there are some random situations where it doesnt get triggered at all but its so unpredictable every time#and varies wildly person to person for seemingly no reason. there r strangers im innately more comfortable with but also friends ive known#for years and will never be comfortable around. i think part of that depends on how strongly the other person communicates and whether-#i feel as if theyre demonstrably able to respect boundaries not just mine but their own too + understand theyre not always fixed#ideally i need to have had this conversation with them so i Know they understand. which is rly difficult i find it so hard to admit#and i have a complicated mental block where i need the other person to naturally bring it up which very very rarely ever happens#idk just an atmosphere of safety yknow. i think its intentional touch that specifically makes me panic bc im usually fine w like-#bustling crowds or even expected social rules like handshakes at interviews. bc its not like they're Trying To Touch Me its just rote idk#hopefully eventually ill reach a place where im able to unpack it and reduce its severity bc man sometimes its fucking heartbreaking to me#bc i do genuinely really like physical contact im an incredibly physical person its my main way of interacting w the world#and the way having to force myself to avoid it meshes w my rsd too augh.... its a clusterfuck#even just having one person im completely comfortable with. maaaaan.#almost makes me miss my ex. at least i was mostly cool around them#god its sucked lately ive been having weird vivid dreams related to it. but whatever its so far down my list of problems to prioritize#and at least i dont get it w my familys dog so i can cuddle her :^) i miss her i cant wait to see her next month :D#anywayyyy thats enough im so tired goodnight every1...#.diaries
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it is absolutely caused by my love for the trope where a character becomes inseperable from a dead loved one's item but i think don should have been able to keep little bunny as a comfort item. its not about how feasible it would be for don to sneak into that room a second time n take it without isabella noticing its about how. well he simply deserved to have it i think
#skye's ramblings#i just think he deserved that small part of her to just cuddle and cry whenever the emotions became overwhelming. ithink he deserved that#igot this whole scenario in my head yknow. bc ive always got scenarios in my head. but would he even need to be sneaky abt getting it back?#bc after ep 8 they know isabella knows abt their role in the whole escape. he really has no reason to hide that he knows she still has it#itd really be abt whether he could stomach asking her for it n whether she'd agree. perhaps partof me wants him to be a lil petty abt it#'tell the others she mailed him back bc she didnt want me to be lonely.' 'what does it matter? he'll just end up back in that room anyway.'#ok i absolutely want him to b a little petty. n like i cant see her refusing bc she really does want them to be happy as long as they can#and like don would not be able to say any of this shit without crying. if anything she could think of it like one of ray's rewards#don just deserved to be emotional over her more. some healing anger. a few bitter words as a treat. let him cuddle th bunny plush. ass hole#just a thought i had that spiraled into a whole scene. this is always happening to me <3 if i could write or make comics you'd all see#imagine timeskip don and his design is the same except hes got a stuffed bunny peeking out of his backpack. this is everything to me#well this is wjat the little bunny patch is for which doubles as a sweet moment w gillian n the younger kids#simply a look into my beautiful library of don thoughts <3 shirai has trio favoritism i have. don favoritism
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noooooo i can't go downstairs to get water bc i was singing real loud and i don't wanna face my family and theyre down thereeeeee in the living rooooooommmmm :((((
#aghhhhhhh aoughh#but it could be hoursss :((#and im thirsty from. yknow. all the singingggg#went to a party with karaoke and didn't manage to do a solo song (tbf none of the songs were solo) even though my voice is pretty alright#it was definitely fun-priority mistakes-allowed-and-expected karaoke but that also meant i was supposed to pick songs they could sing#along to and i always forget those/have little point of reference for what others are likely to know#anyway made some bonds on that couch#one of the girls asked me for my number. she was real bubbly and considerate of like. trying to pick songs i knew and stuff#so hopefully i get a new friend out of this ✌️✌️🫶#(was that gay???? technically she asked for my ig mine's just not working rn. am i being gay flirted with??? whats happening. probably not)#whatever point is i spent a while working myself up but didnt end up getting to do my thing so my ass was in the bathroom for like an hour#just. singing wayyy too loudly. way way way too loud. these walls are thin the only thing protecting me is my family's knowledge that#any indication that they heard it would kill me on the spot. we've already had one mishap but he's outta the house rn so like. it's down#to the others#and i was Going for the higher notes (i mean theyre not THAT high i just sing deep so im not used to them) so like. even more noticable#ough
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yknow what the worst part was about the mosquitoes infesting my apartment? the first one i saw, so innocently, thinking it just got in somehow, was a male and i was complimenting it on its cute fuzzy antennae. and then they infested. and then i developed contempt for them whenever they're even near my house.
#same thing happened with the squirrels too. was gonna spend time growing things they could eat. and then they killed it all#so now im like. fuck em. figure it out yourself bitch 🤷#you have NO IDEA what it had to take for me to get to this point. THEY wanted to go to war apparently.#they just didnt know id win. (everythings covered in chicken wire fuck you bitch)#i never have issues with squirrels in the forests or elsewhere. but the squirrels around my house? my enemies.#go ahead and derive whatever assumptions you're gonna about that bc ik you're gonna anyways and its gonna be the least charitable#thing too so i really dont care about trying to say how i feel nicely anymore bc ppl will choose what it means anyways#without asking me to clarify for shit.#if you seriously think im too stupid to be able to be normal about these creatures outside of my house you literally just. do not know me#as a person as well as you think you do.#every time there is a bug problem in my house i keep repeating 'we would be so cool and chill if you just did Not try to live in here'#'you are easier to appreciate when you are not spreading diseases in my house' yknow. it sounds pretty reasonable to me personally
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Staring at the screen thinking, "You can reach out! Please reach out! I'm here, I will always be here for you, please message me. Please."
#so did you know tiktok has a new feature where you can see when aomeone has viewed your profile? did you know?#i learned that the other day when it notified me of like. an old coworker checking it#now he and i are just checking each other back and forth. to me its a fun little game#yknow whats not a fun litle game?#the fact that when i got that notification i immediately went and checked an old friend's that im no contact with#and then she checked mine back..and i checked hers again#and today i got the notification that she checked mine again#im feeling really normal about this by the way#neither of us have anything posted. so maybe im crazy. but im checking just so she gets the notification#and i have to assume shes doing the same. but maybe not#last time we talked i told her she was always welcome back in my life#but i knew i couldn't be the first to reach out. it'd be up to her#and at the time she said she didnt anticipate that being the last time we would talk#so for the last three years ive been hoping praying and waiting for the day that she comes back#even though realistically i know it wont happen so i almost wish she hadnt said that#but this is the closest weve come to speaking in those three years. checking each others tiktok profiles#and im just staring at the notification whispering 'you can come back. please come back'#i will die wishing that she would call me#i know that to be true as much as it hurts. but for right now i can be hopeful. or something like that#and keep checking her profile. in the hopes that she'll come back
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very freeing to actually own up (to myself) abt post-ph being an au. now i can make a little list of the little ways it deviates from leading to st
#i do not want to play st but i know vaguely enough to know where post ph deviates#rn its just tetra deciding not to find a new hyrule and linebeck being gay and unwilling and unable to have biological kids#with tetra ive been thinking kf her having a bit of a thing on realizing that she is technically what remains of hyrule#and it is ultimately up to her whether or not to let the kingdom remain a memory or to bring it back#and she eventually decides not to. try and erect a new kingdom in a world where people really dont even want that#like theres the whole thing abt the great sea being a dead zone or w/e and then theres fish in st. what is it#my hc for that is that the water around old hyrule is a dead zone but the further out the get the better things get#like the old kingdom is some blight under the seas and its not until its finally properly laid to rest does that dead zone fully disappear#look i know the gods fucking flooded hyrule but i honestly think its a biiiit much if they just gave the survivors a dead fucking ocean#that would likely lead to them just dying out with the only way out being to make the kingdom again#yknow the kingdom they fucking flooded. i feel like hyrule being re-established is fucking stupid and i think#mass-settling everyone on some landmass is a lot less interesting than everyone living one different islands and adjusting to this sea base#life. yknow? like i feel like theres a lot that can be done with islands with different geographies and cultures and populations#and also i think hyrule should stay gone i like the idea of the ww side of things being the one where the cycle ends#and so the world is free is from the cycle perpetuated by the kingdom’s existence and demise’s curse#i always think of demises curse as just being. as long as ur kingdom exists and whatnot there will be no peace#rather than a literal reincarnation cycle. its just. hyrule sucks and theres also a heros spirit thing#like theres a postal service and people are traveling and they have cultures and shit like. its not a hell situation#ppl are moving on and theres no kingdom to lord over all of them so they all have their own ways of life in their corners of the world#idk i think its interesting to think abt how the great sea world works and the different peoples and islands and how they go abt life#its more interesting to me than anyways yeah they are not free from the endless cycles of history and just make hyrule again#post-ph#salty talks#wanted to talk and didnt know what to talk abt so have a tag post#with a rlly tiny side of yeah post ph linebeck is sterile he got that shit removed bc he didnt want that there anyways#bottom surgery (or whatever its called its a hysterectomy) exists in the great sea. isnt there brain surgery mentioned#they got hrt in the great sea either its magic or its. idk potions. maybe the great sea era has decent medicine that seems to be the idea#tbh its not clear what happened to lead to st anyways i can just keep track of clear discrepancies#ill be honest im still iffy on the details with intersex linebeck and that. is an issue#i go with rn that he has ambiguous/female leaning genitals and had a malformed uterus and ovotestes that got removed
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In October, my dad got upset with me when I told him I wanted to try taking ADHD medication to see if it would help me.
"You're basically getting meth from a drug dealer!"
I didn't say anything else about it.
A couple months later, he said something about me doing a lot more lately, and how it was good.
....I started taking dexamphetamine in November.
#idk its just. amusing? funny? to me? idk#also its not freaking meth oh my god#'its the same thing' okay and hydrogen peroxide is the same as water! would you like a glass of hydrogen peroxide? :)#since its the same thing?#ugh#anyway.#its funny/amusing in. not a good way.#i still havent told him and im scared to#but also. he doesnt neednto know. i dont live with him. im 25. i can make my own decisions.#im sorry but i dont think 15-30mg of dexamphetamine most days is worse than several bottles of beer or cigarettes every day.#especially not when im under. doctors supervision.#getting my blood and eye pressure checked regularly.#peoples attitudes towards drugs meant to be medicine annoys me so much#he also wants me to get off my antidepressants.#the things that.#yknow.#stopped me having seizures almost every day.#idk i think hes in denial about me mot being okay because he doesnt want to think abojt what happened#or think about how he didnt stop it#ignore me this got very different from what i originally had in mind
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