#they look at my fucking. cartoon wolf drawing or something and i think. she might be right actually. people keep getting frustrated with me

[bmpmp3]

post ankle-twisting clarity

[maraudererasmut]

Experiment MJ001

TW: Drug and alcohol use. Mentions of drugs and alcohol use by minors. 

Marjiuana is legal in my country. It has been for a while.

I’ve always been very nervous about things in my life. Not anything in specific, just things in general. I had spend so long being repressed by my parents, I had cotten it in my head that drugs = bad and since marjiuana = drug, QED marjiuana = bad. 

Today, I decided to do something out of the ordinary and purchase a (legal) chocolate bar from the pot store and try it out!

So, I am currently high for the very first time in my life! (I’m in my late 20s)

I had an idea that I thought was brilliant at the time to write Wolfstar fan fiction about Remus getting high for the first time WHILE I was high and see what happened!

I also decided that I’m going to POST IT. Without editing it! (Pure, unadulterated chaos!!!) Now, for your viewing pleasure, the ramblings of a T on Pot. I have no idea if this is good or not. I haven’t read through it yet. I’ll probably wake up tomorrow, read this, regret it and delete it. But until then... enjoy!

((I’m sorry if it’s terrible!!!))

((I am also currently still high while typing this, so I apologize for any errors!!))

Remus had never consumed marjiuana before. Growing up, his parents had been very strict with what kinds of medication he was allowed to consume, particularly in regards to his lycanthropy. “You don’t know how it will affect the wolf, Remus.” “You don’t know what will happen…” “We can’t predict how the wolf will react…” 

Magic had always been the go-to remedies for colds or maladies; Muggle drugs were never to be trusted in the LUpin home.

So when Remus got drunk for the first time, he made sure that his friends were around to help him through the experience. 

Now, in his seventh year of school, Remus finally built up enough courage to ask his friends to, once-again, monitor Remus while he was testing the waters.

Remus sat with the three other Marauders, staring at the brownie in his hand.

“Are you sure this is safe?” he groaned, internally terrified of what may happen. The scent of the brownie wafted through the air, and Remus cursed his wolfish senses as his mind began convincing him that this might be worth it for the chocolate alone.

“��Yeah, I’m sure, Moons…” Sirius teased, licking his lips like a cartoon wolf sizing up a prized pig as he stared at his own brownie.

“Yeah, Pads and I have done this hundreds of times!” James chimed in, already  half way through his. “It’s fine!”

“You’re not werewolves,” Remus grumbled as he turned to Peter. “You’re the sensible one, Wormy. What do you think?”

Peter stared at Remus for a moment before breaking out into a smile. 

“I say fuck it!” he said, taking a bite out of his own brownie. “You only live once, Moons!”

Remus closed his eyes, took a bite from his brownie, chewed and swallowed. 

Nothing happened.

No big bang, no swirling in his brain, no sudden rush of feeling. 

“It’s… not working?” He said, turning to Sirius.

“Give it a bit, Moons! It takes time to work! It’s like alcohol!”

“Okay,” Remus said with a shrug, finishing the rest of his brownie. “So… what do I do until then?”

Sirius shrugged, but his smirk gave him away. He sat back onto the pillows and blankets that they had dragged to the ground, his head resting precariously close to Remus’ lap. He grinned up at Remus before reaching for his wand and giving a lazy flick into the air. 

Sirius’ record player began to spin, and All Along the Watchtower began playing, filling the entire room and seeping into Remus’ bones.

Remus laid back on the pillows, his head next to Sirius’. He closed his eyes and let Hendrix drift through his mind, trying not to let Sirius’ scent drive him crazy. 

Remus didn’t feel anything.

Not for a while.

He didn’t think it was even working.

The boys had spent the next hour talking, chatting, chilling, as they usually do on Saturday evenings. They talked about girls (James complaining about Lily), boys (Sirius’ trists with that Ravenclaw boy), and everything in between (Peter’s insistence that, yes, James, he is still Asexual. And no, James, he doesn’t need to double check.) 

Remus didn’t notice the time passing as he laid on the pillows next to his friends, for the first time in his life actually being able to participate fully. They normally spend evenings hanging out in the middle of the room. James and Sirius always got high. They had since they had discovered Muggle weed last year. Peter had partaken on occasion, but usually insisted that he preferred a couple of beers over weed. Remus, on the other hand, remained sober all night, watching his friends fall into various states of inebriation, testing their limits, seeing new sides of themselves. 

This was his first time.

Remus smiled to himself, thinking about how much fun it is to participate, even if he didn’t know what being high felt like yet. 

“What’re you smiling about?”

Sirius’ voice was practically a purr in Remus’ ear, and he felt his heartbeat quicken. 

“M’not… Not really. Just… happy to be here with you lads....”

“Mmm, same, Moons. Happy to be here… Today’s a good day to be alive…”

“That’s a weird thing to say…” Remus rolled over and looked at Sirius. 

Was Sirius always that handsome? Did his eyes always sparkle silver in their conjured lights? Did his hair always look that soft and touchable? What would happen if Remus touched it? Was his skin always so pale, so milky while, Remus had to resist leaning over and tasting it. Remus edged his arm over slightly, comparing his own freckle-dusted arm to Sirius’. One was slender and perfect and tattooed and lovely. One was broken and scarred and ugly. 

It was no wonder Sirius never noticed Remus.

“Whatya thinkin’ ‘bout?”

Sirius’ voice distracted Remus from his thoughts. 

“Mm? What’d’ya mean?” 

I can see for miles and miles and miles and miles and miles…

The Who was playing in the background and Remus watched as Sirius’ head bobbed up and down to the music, a wide grin spread across his perfect cheeks. 

“I mean you’re thinkin’ of stuff. We all are… I am… That’s what makes things so cool when you’re high… You think of stuff…”

Remus blinked. What was Sirius even saying? What had he been doing? Was he thinking? He seemed to be thinking…

His brain felt like the needle was skipping across the record. Or that more than one record was playing at a time. Everything that was said out loud was one record in one player, and a vision of him talking to Sirius from a bird’s eye view was another record. And the way the music blended into his brain was another record. 

Was this what being high was?

“I’m thinking of the music… I guess. And… Mrs. Robinson…”

“Ha ha! That’s that one Hufflepuff chick, ya?”

“What? No… it’s… coo coo ca choo?” Remus closed his eyes. His mind was feeling a bit foggy. 

Put it in your pantry with your cupcakes…

“Oh! Yeah! Jesus holds a place for those who pray…”

“Hey hey hey!” James’ voice came from miles away. Or across the room. To Remus, it felt like both at once.

“Yeah,” Remus said with a grin, rolling over onto his left side to face Sirius. “Coo coo choo, Mrs. Robinson….”

“BOYS!” Peter hollered from the other side of the room. “Hot Blooded! This is my jam!”

Remus grinned, listening as the sound of guitar filled the room. He tapped along to the song, watching Sirius watch the ceiling.

“What are you thinking about, Pads?”

Sirius tilted his head towards Remus and gave a wink. 

“That I’m hot blooded,” he said, his tongue resting on his fang. 

“Pfftt… You’re just a horny mutt…” Remus teased. He felt an immediate pang of regret as Remus realized that Sirius was likely horny for a certain Ravenclaw boy. 

“Mmm, bet you are too. Not that you’d ever date anyone… But I bet you’re real bad, Moons… “

Remus rolled his eyes, trying to keep his heart from exploding from his chest with terror. Why was Sirius talking about how horny Remus was? That wasn’t something Sirius ever talked about. 

“You know how it is… not allowed. The whole… furry little problem…”

Oooh, I’m picking up good vibrations, oooh she’s giving me excitations…

“I’ve told you, just date one of us…”

Remus chuckled, trying not to show how much he wished he could. 

“Oh yeah, James would totally ditch Lily for me,” Remus teased, listening to the Beach Boys suddenly start the quiet part of Good VIbrations. 

“I didn’t say date James…”

“Oh, Sorry… Peter then… Yup. That seems like a great idea…”

Good good good good vibrations!!

“Are those really your only choices?”

Sirius was on his side at this point, facing Remus head-on, giving a sly grin. 

Normally, Remus would laugh this off as a joke and change the subject. Perhaps talk about the fact that Sirius had American Woman on his magical mixed-record. 

Today was different though. Today, Remus was feeling a little bolder. A little dizzier. A little more capable of looking at the situation differently.

Most days, from the very beginning of his life, Remus had been taught to be small, demure, less than other people. He knew not to make waves or say what was on his mind, because he was not to draw attention to himself. Today, for the first time in his entire life, Remus was starting to understand what it felt like to be a normal person. Someone who wasn’t a werewolf. Someone who didn’t grow up being told that they had to hide themselves because of societal pressures. Today, he could suddenly just say whatever he thought and felt and there was absolutely nothing keeping him from saying it. 

“I can’t very well date you, Padfoot. What would that poor Ravenclaw boy do without you in his life?”

“Who, Spencer? Nah, we were never an item. Just fooling around…”

“Fine then,” Remus said with finality, trying to shrug while on his side. Whoooo are you? Who who, who who? “I suppose you’re the only person in all of Hogwarts who I can date.” 

Sirius grinned his wicked grin, inching closer to Remus, his eyes positively smouldering. 

“I suppose so. Guess we’re to call it, then. We’re dating now…”

Whooo are you? Who who? Who who?

Aaaawww, who the fuck are you?

“Hear that Prongs,” Remus said, playing along with the joke. “Sirius and I are dating now.”

“Well it’s about goddamn time,” James yelled back.

Remus chuckled to himself, but when he opened his eyes, Sirius was there. In front of him, their noses almost touching… There was a moment…

Whoooo are you? Who who? Who who?

Remus inched closer, rubbing his nose to Sirius’, just playing along, just being silly, just keeping up with the game.

Sirius closed the gap.

Remus sank into the kiss, feeling Sirius’ lips against his own, Sirius’ tongue tasting like chocolate and pot, Sirius’ hands suddenly around his waist. 

Then Remus pulled away.

Who are you? Who who? Who who?

“Who the fuck are you?”

Sirius laughed, pulling himself slightly away from Remus.

“I just wanted to see how far you’d be willing to play along! I didn’t realize you’d actually let me kiss you!”

“Fuck…” Remus swore, starting to feel angry at Sirius. “Shit... I thought maybe…”

“Maybe what?”

“Nothing…”

“Maybe what, Remus?”

“Nothing, Sirius.” Sirius’ lips were against Remus’ again, but the werewolf knew better this time. He pulled away, his eyes narrowing. “Stop dicking around.”

“I’m not dicking around…” Sirius whispered, his voice dropping low and rumbly. Remus felt a chill down his spine as House of the Rising Sun played in the background.  

“Don’t kiss me if you don’t mean it,” Remus grumbled, before he had a chance to think about his words and and regret saying him, Sirius was kissing him again. Remus tasted his tongue and lips and the thrill of kissing someone he had wanted to kiss for as long as he could remember. Sirius pulled away, his eyes gleaming and ravenous. 

“I mean it,” he cooed. “I—”

Before he could continue, Remus was pressed into Sirius, taking advantage of his inebriated state and lack of over-thinking. 

“Get a room, you prats!” James called across the room. Remus didn’t care. He didn’t care about anything except the feeling of Sirius’ body against his own, Sirius’ hands around his hips, Sirius’ tongue in his mouth, Sirius’ teeth nipping his lower lip. Everything was Sirius.

Remus closed his eyes and lost himself in his Padfoot. He silently prayed that things could stay this easy forever, but deep inside, he knew that would be a dangerous path to head down...

[lucastheunlucky]

Who Made Who | Luke&Blanche

Time Frame: Current Who: Blanche & Luke Possible Triggers: Body horror Location: Strawford Park Summary: Luke has been seeing a ghost around him and Blanche offers to help work out where she might be buried. Going back to the mass grave where he was disposed of a few years ago, causes her to lash out. She finally shows her face, and the horrors of exactly who she is and who hurt her.  

Blanche pulled her yellow jeep into Strawford Park’s parking lot with a low sigh, sliding into the parking space. She was overly prepared, as per usual. Some might call her paranoid, and they’d be right, but she had seen far too much to not be. She had enough salt in her bag to kill a baby moose, as well a small iron rod, wards, taser, mace, and acid mace. Probably a bit of overkill, but if she was going to be ghost hunting - sorta - with Lucas, then it was better to be overly prepared than not at all. Swinging her backpack on her back, she locked her car and stuffed her keys into her back pocket, walking up to Strawford Park’s gates, immediately tensing. Cemeteries were always haunted, she could feel the spirits lingering inside, and she winced as she lingered outside, waiting for Lucas. She felt him before she saw him, feeling the presence of a ghost coming ath er from a different direction, and she looked up from staring at her shoes and waved. “Hey!” she called, “What’s up? How are you feeling? Any better?”

So Lucas had only one goal in mind with all this-- and it didn’t actually involve him. ‘Do not, under any fucking circumstance, have Blanche get hurt.’ There was nothing else that mattered to him, because answers could always be found in other ways, and there wasn’t a super rush. Even with this ghost-- well-- it wasn’t good, but Lucas could handle it. He waved at Blanche, her smaller stature, backpack, and youthful energy making Lucas concerned already for her safety. “Hey there, Blanche,” he gave a soft smile, and sighed a bit. “I’m feeling a bit sick, but I’m good though. You have some gear on you, stuff to help with ghosts?” He asked, pushing the gate open, and looking out at the gravesite with a thump in his throat. “It's just on the edge, back I think-- better to not walk the middle, yeah?”

“A bit sick?” Blanche’s brows knit together in concern almost immediately. This was why she had wanted to go alone. In theory, the hard part was done, Lucas already knew where the grave was. She walked with him through the gates, grimacing slightly as she nodded. “Yeah, good idea. I - sometimes I have a nasty habit of drawing spirits to me. Something about my aura or something,” Blanche said with a shrug, “So staying away from most of them would be most appreciated. But I do have stuff in my bag that’ll help,” she patted her backpack slightly. “Iron, salt, wards,  you know, the usual.” After a moment, she paused and looked at him, concerned once again. “Here, we can go slow, okay? Are you sure you’re up for this”

Lucas chuckled, trying to keep his tone calm and slightly teasing. “Blanche, I don’t know what the usual is for ghosts, so I’m going to have to take your word for it. I’m not the type to grab weapons.” He’d have to remember that though, any new information on supernaturals wasn’t the worst to have. So the ghosts were attracted to her in a bad way, this put a frown on his lips, glad he hadn’t let her come alone. “Listen, if this goes sideways, I want you to come with my brother next time. There’s never a need to have shit like this bother you so aggressively alone.” He almost let out an annoyed growl, but it stopped in his throat. At her pause he looked back. “Of course, I know this seems grim and I don’t feel the best, but what if it helps? If we both feel like we need to turn around-- we will. Want a code word? Something we can just shout and we run like our ma’am’s have a wooden spoon and we’re on our last warning?” 

“Oh, I am,” Blanche said automatically, with a shrug. “The type to grab weapons, I mean.” She thought back to when she and Winston went to look at the cursed chest on the beach, going to snap photos and kill Karknoids. The back seat of her old, shitty car had been full of bats, bricks, wasp spray, and anything else she could find. She was a bit more prepared now. “Salt and iron are usually good for ghosts, though. I have wards on me in case I have to ward anything off while I’m here. But I don’t think anything’s going to go sideways.” At least, she hoped not. She let out a low sigh as she rubbed the back of her neck. “Your brother?” She frowned, not sure she liked the idea of that. Blanche wasn’t even sure coming here with Lucas was a good idea for Lucas’ safety, she didn’t want something bad to happen to his brother too. “If he’s alright with that. Does he know about this?” They continued walking, Blanche letting out a low laugh. “A code word? Like we’re spies or something? Do you think we’ll need something like that instead of just saying, Zoinks Scoob, let’s get the hell outta here?”

“Yeah, he will know. I don’t keep anything from him anymore, and he’s in search and rescue, he will be able to help out if we can’t find her body,” Lucas easily said. For some reason, while they walked along the edge, steps careful, and both vigilant to their surroundings, he couldn’t help but think about Regan and how she had suggested having a picnic in a graveyard. He internally smiled at that. Weirdo. She was something special. As they moved, Lucas felt the hair on his arms rise up, and he cracked his neck as it grew stiff, the muscles feeling heavier along his shoulders and making his body groan a little against itself. “Yes, Zoinks, please say that,” he said quietly. He glanced at his phone at the rough map, but in reality, he kinda knew where it was now that he was here. His memory was broken up from the day he was put here, hazy like they were echoes of moments over what actually happened. “Shit,” he glanced down when a surprise of pain made his chest suddenly ache and a wave of dizziness hit him. 

Blanche hated graveyards, always had. Whenever her parents would drag her and her little brother to see their great grandparents when they were small. Blanche would scream her head off, even though she was supposed to be the older, more mature one. Her screaming would set her brother off and it would always end with their father snarling at them to stop causing a scene and to behave. After a few failed times, they stopped going. Except Blanche never did stop seeing ghosts. “I can keep my old cartoon references going, if you want. Yabbadabbadoo,” Blanche snorted to herself, shaking her head. The spirit’s presence coming off of Lucas became stronger all of a sudden, causing her to pause as gravel crunched under her sneakers. She turned to look at him. “Lucas?” Blanche asked. Spots of blood were appearing on his shirt. He was hurt? What? “Lucas! Your shirt! Your skin - What - what’s happening? Are you okay?!”

Luke didn’t want to blame the ghost, even if it wanted to hurt him. It wasn’t her fault she died. It was Gotch’s. A low sound vibrated in his chest in a growl. “Yeah--,” he said. “I just felt suddenly sideways, vertigo, tired.” As he finished speaking the familiar southern drawl carried through the graveyard and his heart stopped for two beats before it started into a fumbling race that sent a tremble to his fingertips. ‘Another person with you? So comfortable.’ Lucas refused to look towards where it came from because he knew he wasn’t in town. He’d not heal from losing an arm that fast. “I don’t know what’s happening.” 

“She’s what?” Blanche gaped at him. And then she saw her appear before her eyes and Blanche stumbled back eyes wide. This was no girl - well, it was a girl, but it wasn’t quite how it should have been. She was instantly reminded of Lauren Langley’s true form, with intestines spilling out of her body. This was different. The girl was half formed into a wolf, bones bent and broken at odd angles, strange animalistic features and tufts of fur stretched over her skin. The streaked on her face from the large bullet hole in her inhuman skull. Blanche stared in horror, shaking slightly as her stomach churned dangerously.  No, she had a job to do. She could be sick later. Come on. She could do this. She swung her bag off her shoulder. “Lucas?” Blanche said. “It’s okay. She’s here and she’s trying to stop you.” Blanche forced some semblance of calm into her voice. “Let him go!” Blanche commanded. “We’re trying to help you. Let him go.” 

Stop him. Why? ‘Wouldn’t you want to be free of this suffering?’ The disjointed voice carried through him, and Lucas staggered into a standstill when Blanche tried to speak calmly to something behind him. When he laid at night, his nightmares were mostly seeing his packmates taken away, cut up, beheaded, but also it was this shadow of a monster that lurked in the very furthest points of his vision and whispered to end it. It’s always been this way for him. He’s been terrorized too long by Gotch. His voice would always lurk. Luke starred forward, determined to keep the feeling from scaring him, though his body creaked gently in want to defend himself. “She wants me to stop,” he swallowed thickly, taking a few more steps. He blinked a few more times, refusing to believe what he was hearing, the words kept slipping by, but it ached all of him. “Fuck--” his pulse increased. “Blanche-- forward or back?” he asked. 

“Let him go!” Blanche said firmly. She pulled the iron rod from her bag, though she knew the notes she had taken that it wasn’t going to be nearly as effective as she wanted it to be. Oh hell, what was she going to do now. “Lucas, listen to me. Can you hear me. Can you come forward to me?” Blanche asked. Panic was spreading in her body, but she desperately tried to make it go far away. Far, far away. There was a part of her that wished she told Rebecca or Nigel or anyone what exactly she’d be doing today. Mind racing, Blanche had to figure out what she wanted to do now. Go back? No, the longer this thing was attached to his soul meant bad news for Lucas. She didn’t want him to be tormented for that long, he didn’t deserve that. No one deserved that. Could she get the ghost to talk to her? “Look at me!” Blanche demanded. “No you, Lucas. You! The …. Girl. Hello? Can you hear me? Let him go this instant.” Blanche stepped closer to Lucas, almost ready to reach out and yank him towards her. “We want to help you find peace. Don’t you want that? Come on.”

Lucas had amber eyes on her, hair sprouted in places along the highest planes of his arms and knuckles, and he seemed heavier, almost denser as the muscles coiled in tension, but when he looked at her, it was him seeing her with a clear gaze. He refused to have this thing hurt this young woman. Luke could handle it, making him see his worst nightmares even if it made his heart thump at a dangerous pace that stirred him into a wanted shift. He’s been through worse-- he’s suffered so long-- this was nothing. Lucas was a beast with control, and he stepped forward, without restraint, nothing physically holding him back, not that a lot could against a werewolf’s strength. It was what was behind Blanche that made his stomach sour, making it so difficult to stop the paranoia.

‘I want to kill her.’ Gotch smiled and Luke almost shattered, “I can hear you, Velma,” he joked in hopes to not fall into that pitfall, pulling the first name from his pop culture list he could. Blanche’s pulse was high as well, and panic could be easily read and somehow, that was the reassurance he needed to know it was her. “Stay calm,” he took another step. “She has to do a lot to hurt me. I’ve already been to Hell.” The person behind Blanche was Gotch, missing his arm and holding a shotgun at her head. He exhaled and the side of the ghost surfaced just out of his vision near his cheek, her mangled face not the one he always saw but unable to speak from the damage. He took another step. “She hates someone. The one who killed her, it’s all she keeps saying. She keeps showing him to me.”   

Velma. Blanche let out a short laugh that sounded more like some type of high pitched tea kettle noise. “I’m as calm as I’m going to get,” Blanche replied. There was a whispering coming from the ghost that she couldn’t quite hear, and she wondered if it was because she was whispering lowly in Lucas’ ear and not to her. She didn’t want to talk to her - made sense, since Blanche actively wanted to get rid of her. But she also wanted her to find some semblance of peace. The girl would never be able to do that leeching off of people’s souls. She stared at Lucas, examining him closely for a moment. The more responsible part of her, whatever was left of that part, told her to turn back. To abandon this and come back by herself or with his brother. She met his eyes a moment. “She’s showing you things that aren’t real,” Blanche said carefully. After a moment, Blanche held out her hand to him. “Take my hand. We’ll go together, okay?”

“I have fallen for them before,” Lucas admitted, and he still couldn’t look Gotch in the eye, and a small part of him could hear Miles saying it would be extremely tough to face him in all fronts. He had to get better. When Blanche moved, and he took her hand, the illusion broke, the shotgun disappeared and the hallucination dissipated. Lucas stepped forward. His mind ached, like nails carving down his skull to believe it all. That it was real, and Lucas didn’t know if it was because he’d had nightmares for so long that he could navigate this, or because there was light before him-- Blanche’s bravery gave him pride, and appreciation. This was why you didn’t do things alone, right? He squeezed her hand to reassure her and the choice, the gravesite was close. They just had to go up a little more. Could he handle that though? Would he suddenly remember moving the dirt pressed on his face and trying to get out of the ground? 

“That’s okay,” Blanche said, quietly. She was relieved when he grabbed her hand. Gently, she lead him forward, her eyes still on the mangled form of the girl that was so desperately trying  to pull Lucas back. She didn’t understand why she was doing this - then again, Blanche supposed there was no need to know why, just that it was happening in the first place. Was that what her problem was? That she was so caught up in why things happened instead of just taking action and dealing with them as they came? Blanche didn’t know, but it caused a new round of anxiety in her. She clutched the iron rod in her free hand tighter as she pulled Lucas forward.

The weight on his soul seemed to pull and stretch. Like the ghost was tethered and bound to it and leaving his body behind like like a demented balloon. Suddenly something materialized near them and howled a broken, threatening sound. Lucas’ steps stopped, the very instinct to howl back came up without control, and he gritted his teeth as fangs crowded his mouth and his body shifted subtly, swallowing it down as his ribs creaked under his shirt. He turned around and it was Miles, with his face blown off, down to the bone, flesh hung off like a torn bed sheet, only his broken muzzle hung open to let the howl come through, and one eye illuminated and staring at him. ‘Late. Late. Late. This is what happens. Told you, I’d hurt them. I’d cut them. I’d kill him if you went to his side.’ Gotch’s voice whispered in his ear in familiar ways. Lucas stared at his brother, strong emotions a current in his chest, heavy in frustration and fear. His hand fell from hers, taking a step forward. “Don’t show me this--” 

Until he wouldn’t go anymore and she stopped too, squeezing his hand tightly. “Lucas?” She asked. She watched his inner turmoil, eyes going from between the girl and him. “Stop it! Leave him alone! Who are you?!” Blanche snapped. Shit. Lucas said a name, seeing some hallucination that she couldn’t see, turning and walking away, his hand falling from hers. Shit. Blanche rushed forward, practically running to cut Lucas off, holding her free hand up to stop him. “Lucas, look at me. It’s okay! It’s okay, it’s not real.” Blanche bit her like and then resigned herself. “Lucas, I need you to send me the map on your phone. So I know where to go, okay?” 

He closed his eyes so he wasn’t fooled. Did it mean she actually died here, and wasn’t disposed of? Did Gotch kill her so horribly? “Okay--” Luke opened his eyes, rings of gold in his brown, seeing Blanche. It was impossible not to feel this ghost’s presence now, and it was exhausting him fighting back. He pulled his phone out and quickly sent the map and plot location to her cell. “We have to go, it’s-- this is too dangerous now--” he said, wishing he could keep going but knew he didn’t want to put Blanche in any more danger. They got answers though. This wolf-- they deserved to rest. It was the least he could do. 

The ghost was wailing now. A deep, anguished howl erupted from her, and Blanche could feel it ringing in her ears. “Alright,” Blanche said softly, feeling her phone vibrate. She was overwhelmed now, over stimulated by the spirit and Lucas - it happened so often like that. It was easier to be around one instead of both, and Blanche spent the better part of her life wishing it was the live ones. But she could feel this spirit. This girl’s pain. More than that, she could feel just how desperate she was and feel just how close to breaking it was. A session or two with Rebecca hadn’t done much for her senses, other than her focuses on how different sorts of spirits felt, and if Blanche took a moment to breath, took a moment to look at the mangled body of the girl, she knew she didn’t have much time left. She reached for Lucas’ hand and pulled, this time back towards the graveyard gate. “Let’s go home,” she said. And then, she would come back later, without Lucas. So she could deal with this poor spirit herself.

[runningwolf62]

SURPRISE IT’S UPDATE TIME! It’s so bizarre being writing this at the same time Larry is because there’s like this weird overlap, we’re like ships passing in the night he’s finally caught up to my time and now is about to pass me.

Anyway, there’s some lovely art in here and a reference to a blog that actually exists, @ask-potoo-firestar. Art belongs to @lavendersongs, thank you for your amazing contribution to the Warrior Cats fandom and for giving me permission to include references to it in this fanfic.

Beep.

Larry curls up deeper under his blankets.

Beep.

He covers his head with his pillow.

Beep.

Fine, he’ll crawl out of his nest and see what had happened, maybe Nick was in trouble again, that Godot guy seemed to have a grudge against him for something.

u ok?

Only Nick texts like that.

haven’t seen u in few days

u alive?

Larry almost fires something back before thinking better of it, Nick had far too many people around him die to joke about that.

Yeah I’m fine, and you usually don’t see me for awhile.

yeah but u had a rough time

Larry hesitates before deciding to just call Nick. The phone rings a few times before Nick answers.

“Hey Larry,” he greets him, Larry can hear voices in the background, he thinks one is Maya, the other is young and high so probably Pearl.

“Hey Nick,” Larry runs a hand over his jaw, aw gross he’d ended up with that scraggly beard, he never looked good with that, he needed to go shave, “you in a crisis?”

“No?” Nick has the gall to sound offended, “I do not only call you during crisises!”

“Mmm might wanna check you phone bill there Nicky Boy,” Larry teases him, his voice is rough, he should haul himself out of bed and start putting himself back together.

“You want to talk about having a crisis you sound like you’ve been on a bender,” Nick fires back, Larry frowned and groused at him.

“Don’t be an ass Nick, I’ve been taking a week off, chilling and relaxing before I remake myself! You called while I’m still in the cocoon man!”

“That metaphor started strong but you took it somewhere very weird,” Nick replies, Larry laughs roughly.

“Alright, alright, you’re the one who texted me,” Larry points out, wrapping his blanket around him like a cloak to hide his shame from the world and stay warm from the chillier October day. He crossed to his laptop to open his resume, he’d need to update it and he might as well do that while chatting with Nick rather than sit around feeling shitty about it.

He chats with Nick, and Maya and Pearl when they demand a chance to chat with him. He interrogate Nick, or tries, but he doesn’t know what’s up with Godot either, other than he’s got one hell of a caffeine addiction, came out of nowhere and claims to be from hell.

Given half the stories Larry’s heard about Nick’s cases he’s tempted to believe it.

“Maybe you ought to have an exorcism performed,” he teases, he’s on speaker phone now and he’s sure they can hear him typing away as he adds his latest job to the long master list of jobs he’s held, “Maya, Pearl, can you do that?”

“I’d have to exorcise the entire Prosocution’s office!” Maya bemoans, Larry grins as she outlines everything she’d need to do to Nick.

“Maybe you should, it sounds like it has a few too many demons over there even before this guy,” Larry muses, saving his resume and opening Fanfiction.net. His stomach drops and his jokes trail off. There’s several messages from XxWolfDragonxX. Shit, he’d just dropped off the map after talking to the guy daily.

He immediately types a response, assuring the guy some stuff just came up, he got fired from work, etc. but he’s doing alright. He misses a question Nick asked him until he repeats his name.

“Larry.”

“Sorry, what?” He tosses the message to WolfDragon off, his friend is probably off work it’s well after six for him.

“I asked what were you typing?”

Larry glances at his messages and then at his minimized programs. “My resume.”

He refreshed FF.net and got a message from WolfDragon.

Man it’s fine, life happens! It’s just good to hear from you again. I’m sorry for all the shit that keeps happening to you.

Again I’m so sorry, and yeah, it’s just been that kind of year.

Do you have a discord? I have something to show you but I don’t think ff.net will send it.

Oh? Uh yeah actually, one second let me find my ID number.

It takes him longer than he should be tosses the information to Wolfdragon. After a moment he gets a friend request on Discord, from a XxWolfDrgonxX surprising absolutely no one. The avatar is a gray anime wolf with yellow eyes snarling, which also doesn’t surprise Larry though he wonders where it’s from.

However he’s still on the phone with Nick, so he accepts it and turns away from the computer, “so what are you all up to asides from calling me?” He hears Pearl giggle and Maya’s voice in the background, they’re moving away, “how are they Nick?”

“They’re good,” Nick sounds happy and Larry can’t help but hurt even as he’s happy for him.

“We’re probably going to do a few things today before they have to head back,” Nick’s chair creaks audibly, “do you have plans for Halloween?”

“Uh, not really?”

“Do you want to come over to the office and hand out candy with me?”

“People come to your office for candy?”

“Surprisingly yes,” Nick sounds equally baffled by this fact, “so, are you in?”

“Do you want me to bring anything?” Larry asks, glancing at his Discord occasionally, where he can see WolfDragon typing. “Beer, Soda, popcorn and terrible horror movies?”

“Popcorn and let’s go with lighthearted movies,” Nick suggests, and Larry wonders if Pearl will be there. He’ll bring soda then, just in case. That or Nick’s gotten to be more of a scaredy-cat since their last Halloween movie festival.

“Have you seen that one cartoon thing that everyone raves about?” Larry’s seen so much art for it for Inktober so he needs to actually sit down and watch the show obviously is what that means.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Okay, I’ll find it, it’s some kids show but everyone who’s seen it loved it,” Larry sends a quick message to WolfDragon while Nick talks.

You sure are dedicated to your brand.

It’s who I am

Furry.

WHAT IN GOD’S NAME IS THAT?!?

That’s Potoo Firestar you fool

I want to hate it but I’m laughing too hard, it’s amazing.

“Larry are you okay?” Nick asks, and Larry can’t answer, he’s wheezing at the damn Potoo Firestar, he cannot believe WolfDragon got his discord just to send him this, and that it’s somehow made him feel so much better.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine,” he wheezes, and clicks the link that WolfDragon sends him to this person’s blog, “just saw something funny.”

He hops off the phone with Nick promising to see him on Halloween and bring candy and popcorn and the cartoon he’s seen everyone drawing if he could just remember the name.

He spends the next hour teasing WolfDragon on Discord for his avatar and username, all the while scrolling through this blog, which WolfDragon has dubbed “the only pure Warrior Cats blog”.

It doesn’t take long for him to agree though he does have a few questions.

So I miss all the discourse but I also miss blogs like this?

Listen man, some people are still stuck in the can cats be gay discourse?

Seriously?

Yeah, like sure the Erins just made a mistake making some tortoiseshell cats toms. OR they made several trans icons.

I can’t believe Tigerstar was transphobic.

Firestar made the first call out post

“OP is literally a Transphobe and murderer but go off I guess.”

Scourge: *goes the fuck off *

Listen, he wear dog teeth on his collar he can do what he likes, I’m not gonna be the guy to try and stop him.

Oh you do know they made Scourge and Firestar half-brothers right?

THEY WHAT

Yeah they have the same Dad

Oh shit I’d heard that theory but I thought it was just a fan theory

Nah they confirmed it. Also Tallstar was super gay for him

Like canonly gay or the fandom has shipping goggles glued on

Like so canonly gay that the publisher calls them good friends

What?

One of the authors says Tallstar’s heart always belonged to his Jake, but the publishers say they’re just good friends

What’s better than this, guys being dudes.

You’d probably like Tallstar’s Revenge actually, there’s a lot of your fic in it

Seriously?

Yeah man, like leaving the Clans to discover yourself the themes of forgiveness and parents and family there’s a lot of good stuff in there

I guess I’ll have to read it then.

Yeah, that blog I linked you even did fanart of Jake and Tallstar

Oh my god.

Did you find it?

Not yet, but I’m looking.

FOUND IT!

THAT’S IT

Okay that is gay.

Much like my fic.

Now I gotta man.

He did just lose his job but Larry’s got some money saved from his last paycheck and the commissions. What the hell. He makes a note to buy Tallstar’s Revenge next time he’s at the book store, and gets up.

Thanks for this.

Of course!

Is this the best way to contact you, or should I howl out the window?

Haha

FF.net or Discord works I’ll probably review your fics on FF.net still but we can chat here

Larry grins and tells him he hopes he has a good evening. He needs to clean himself up and try and rejoin society.

He showers, shaves, and pulls himself together. He also draws Wolf as a Potoo and sends that back to WolfDragon which is obviously loved, if the fact he turns his avatar into it was any indication.

-

Larry spends Halloween crashing on Nick’s couch, Maya and Nick fighting over candy while he snags some and occasionally slips a piece or two to Pearl. The kid’s clever and smiles shyly at him every time he does so.

They do settle down to watch the cartoon though Maya grumbles at points about how she wanted to watch the Steel Samurai Halloween Special.

They enjoy Over the Garden Wall though, even if it sends the girls diving to hide behind Nick at one point from the Beast. He lets Nick comfort, while he cleans up some of the trash into the popcorn bowl which he sets to the side, making sure it will not be grabbed by mistake by someone hurrying to give candy to trick-or-treaters.

He’s honestly astonished at the number that turn up at the office, until Nick says he thinks Mia used to hand the candy out, which makes sense. It’s tradition now. And Nick must’ve gotten paid because he’s got the good candy and he’s letting kids take handfuls.

He doesn’t touch that stuff only the bag Nick bought for them to share and the stuff he traded Pearl for because she didn’t like nuts in her candy. Said they got stuck in her teeth which Larry felt was a valid reason to not like them.

He tells himself that means they have protein as he pops a handful in his mouth. While Nick’s busy with some teens at the door and Maya’s tucking Pearl in on the couch he sends a message to WolfDragon.

Happy Halloween.

Technically it’s November, and I didn’t grow up in America

Spoilsport.

WHY ARE YOU AWAKE?

Work

Work can suck my dick, it’s what- oh

It’s six in the morning

You’re going to work

Yup

Listen, I don’t need your sass

It’s not sass I just woke up Writer boy

Don’t you sass Wolfman

Tell me you at least watched terrible werewolf movies in my honor

I did not.

Watched kids cartoons instead.

Warrior Cats Authors

There was an actual child in the room!

Ah what’s being introduced to fear at a young age?

Trauma I believe, and the kid’s had enough of that

You’re a good guy you know that, don’t let people tell you otherwise

“Texting a girlfriend?” Maya’s teasing voice made him jump, she wasn’t peering over his shoulder yet but she might’ve been. She might’ve seen the teasing and… no, she was looking at his face.

“Nah, just a friend,” he shoves his phone back into his pocket, she and Nick are both staring at him intensely now, he’s not sure why but they are.

He swears he sees Nick counting to three but he’s not sure why that happens either. He and Maya share a look, and Larry feels himself tense more.

He looks to Nick, whose eyes pierce him as he looks at Larry, “I thought you said you were taking a break from dating.”

“I am!” Larry insists, careful to keep his voice low, glancing to Pearl because however much they want to interrogate him he knows they’ll kill him if he wakes her.

Nick and Maya look confused again but it’s not his fault they can’t accept that he’s just friends with some people. He’s not even into guys anyway!

He shakes his head and grins at them, “glad to hear you think I have that much game though Nick.”

Maya smothers a laugh, while the edge flows out of Nick’s eyes and a smile takes its place, “you keep getting girls to date you somehow.”

“It’s that I have an artist’s soul,” Larry pulls himself up and rests his hand over his chest, grinning at the two of them.

“I went to art school too you know,” Nick points out, relaxing and smiling.

“And who taught you all those tricks for backgrounds?” Larry fires back, he’s always been the better artist for backgrounds and forms, Nick just had more practice with human anatomy. Nick huffs and shakes his head.

“I showed you how to draw men’s jawlines, ‘cause you only paid attention when the model was female-”

“Nick I’ve accepted my heterosexuality and horndog ways will be my downfall,” he fires back which obviously takes his friend by surprise, Maya too, “hey, I can have some self-awareness you know.” He glances over at Maya, “Nick, Edgey and I are allowed the common sense of one person but we have to share and Edgey came back and took it all from Nick.”

“Excuse me?” Nick looks so genuinely offended and Larry laughs, shoulders shaking.

“You took some back, TSA wouldn’t let him take it all with him.”

Maya’s grinning and apparently not taking sides as he and Nick begin to playfully jab at each other about who has more common sense, and it’s nice to be able to talk about Edgey again without Nick’s anger, to have him laugh as he talks and recounts stories from elementary school to Maya is worth the few bits of his dirty laundry that Nick airs.

They end up on the other couch, Maya curled up on Nick’s one side, Larry on the other; with jackets draped over themselves as make shift blankets.

“Larry?”

“Yeah Nick?”

“Who were you texting earlier,” Nick’s not judgmental now but he is obviously curious, maybe hoping that in his exhaustion Larry will let something slip.

And he does.

“He’s a guy I met online, we talk about like books and stuff. You wouldn’t understand, you nerdy lawyer.”

Nick laughs softly as Larry slumps against him, “that so?”

“It is,” Larry lays his head back against Nick’s shoulder, “very so.”

-

They wake up in various states of aching and trying to hide it, all of them trying to deny they’re getting old while Pearl buzzes around the office. Larry wonders briefly if she’s gotten into the Halloween candy for breakfast.

He checks his phone and there’s a few messages from WolfDragon.

You still there?

Don’t eat too much candy, aren’t you doing NaNoWriMo this year?

Larry only barely manages not to curse in front of Pearl as he realizes that he’s going to have to write his first 1667 words with one hell of a crick in his neck.

[jadienjaystoriesandart]

A Little Bit More About Myself

Hello!

So, sometimes I get asked questions when I might comment or reblog some things, but never in my inbox. So, I decided today to tell a bit more about myself and what I do.

Somethings on here might be a bit controversial, I’ll try to keep most my political beliefs out of the picture, as I do believe your political self should have no value in you as a person. Even though some people let it, but I will tell you were I lie on the spectrum.

So, first question: What is your Political Spectrum?

Answer: I’m a Moderate, I tend to lean a bit more to the idea that we should be equal though. I believe in rights for LGBTQA, (I think is the spelling for it, I feel like every time I see it another letter is added.), I believe in Pro-choice, and firmly am on the side that your shoulder treat others like decent human beings. However, I also believe that both sides can have their extremists, and both sides can be just as crazy as the other, I’ve seen them both use the same fallacy tactics in arguments, and both can be shitty people if they want to be. (This doesn’t mean I can’t fuck up either, I am human.)

2nd Question: What do you Identify as? (Both sexually and gender based?)

Answer: I tend to go by She/Her pronouns, since, by medical based ideas, I was ‘born’ a girl. However, I also tend to lean towards Non-Binary, they/them, as since I was young I tended to not care if I looked like a boy to other people, what can I say means clothing is WAY more comfortable some some women’s clothing. (Especially jeans) and long hair is a PAIN for me as I get headaches alot. Really I never cared if I was called Male or Female or They. By this point my friends call me all three, and I’m fine with this, it feels right. 

As for my sexuality, I am Biromantic, or in long terms, I am a Bisexual Asexual. Meaning I like both males and females, trans or not, in a romantic sense. I can’t really get behind sex as an action because the idea seems weird, disgusting, a all kinds of ‘ug’ to me. Does this mean I may never have sex? Most likely, but Ace people can still have sex so we’ll see.  I think tend to lean more to females though, as I’ve found when a guy asks me out I get VERY uncomfortable. I dislikes the idea of dating, and always get VERY BAD anxiety when asked out, and even when doing platonic cuddling. Yet I’m find when it’s with friends... so meh?

3rd Question: What is your spiritual belief?

Answer: Really I believe in many gods, I am on the, I guess one could call wiccan belief. In which I think I have two parental figures for gods, to explain it’s the idea that two or more gods take a ‘liking’ to you, and they are you main ones that help you in your spiritual journey.  I do cleansing and tarot card readings, as well as alchemy stones and pendulums. Scarily I’ve been pretty accurate on alot of things in my life uses these methods. So, it’s proof enough for me, but maybe not to others.  I also do believe in spirit animals, more on that next.

4th Question: Spirit Animals?

Answer: There is always this negative idea around belief in ‘spirit animals’ so I’ll elaborate.  No, I am not otherkin, which is the idea in the past you believe your were a fantasy or other creature/animal(at least that SEEMS to be the general idea, the definition I finds changes alot from person to person). Never once felt like I was something else, animal or such, in the past, but I do believe in past lives so whose to say what I was. (I mean, it doesn’t say anywhere in past lives or reincarnation that we WILL be human so...) Spirit animals to me are guides of your inner self, traits that manifest into beings that represent them. For instance one of mine is a Hawk, which means my inner self is very perceptive and careful, which yeah, I am. These guides typically are just reflections of your mind put into form when you meditate. At least, that’s how I see it.

5th Question: Are you anything else you want to share?

Answer: Yes actually, I am a furry. Before you start, no, furry is not always a kink people have. Furry can be just the liking of dressing up as an antro animal. Which I happen to like cosplaying and I like animals with human likeness, I mean we all watched Disney so... I just like dressing up as one.  And for those that want to know, my Fursona is a hybrid, a Bluejay Wolf, her backstory is that she can’t fly as her feathers are woven with fur between them, making it hard for her to fly, she can glide for a short period of time. 

6th Question: What are some of your favorite fandoms?

Answer: That’s hard to say, I like cartoons alot, like Steven Universe, Gravity Falls, lots of late 90′s and early 2000′s ones. I like the comic series of The Arcana, and I also like Sander Sides. Lots of amines too, I am a bucket full of many fandoms and sometimes I tend to for a year just go crazy over one. Not sure why, just do.

7th Question: What do you do mostly on here?

Answer: Mostly I love writing more than drawing, though I can draw I tend to find my mind gets away with me. And where I suck as comic drawing, I find writing to be easier to get them out.  I always seem to be coming up with new ideas for AU’s, like I legit have a Sander Sides RWBY AU I’m thinking about, and another one that is already fleshed out. 

8th Question: You seem to bounce around or repeat yourself alot? Why?

Answer: Guys, I’m VERY forgetful, memory for me isn’t the best. I don’t mean to pester people, it’s not that I’m sending asks because I am annoyed or trying to be. It’s because I forget if I ever did send it to your or not.  I may have done something like this once before, but can’t remember at all. Friends think I have ADHD, the more I live, the more inclined I am to think so too.

9th Question: Are asks open?

Answer: Since starting up AU’s people like, I decided to finally open my ask box. So Yes, they are open. 

10th Question: Any OCs?

Answer: Actually yeah, lots. Jade is my avatar and she has a whole backstory with her. I also have Christopher, my go to guy for most things. Vanitas is my Minecraft OC, yes I be a KH fan what of it? There is also Jackie, my female OC who I use.  I may or may not have came up with my own ‘sides’ out of boredom one day. lol. Lots of OC’s, happy to talk about them if honest.

11th Question: Do you go to college or something?

Answer: Yes, and Covid thanks for killing me with online English and Biology. While my teachers have it put together what they want us to do, still doesn’t help when the deadlines are all over the place. I have a degree in Horticulture, if you have plant raising questions just ask. But I was getting a business degree before my teacher screwed me over after my grandfather died. And I also have a Art Education one that I could transfer with... Not sure yet, we’ll see. 

CLOSING NOTES?

I’m happy to answer anymore if you guys are curious, let me know if you want them private or not. But these is a bit more about myself. 

[upthenorthmountain]

Disneyland Paris Ride Reviews

Here they are! Reviews or all the rides and shows we experienced. So there’s a few missing that we didn’t do for various reasons, but we hit the majority of what was available to us I think!

DISNEYLAND PARK

 FANTASYLAND

 Sleeping Beauty’s Castle

At Disneyland Paris the castle is Sleeping Beauty’s Castle (Le Château de la Belle au Bois Dormant). There are steps up inside the castle and you can see stained glass windows and tableaux with the scenes from Sleeping Beauty, and also step out onto the balcony to see the view over Fantasyland. There is a dragon under the castle - if you walk up from Main Street and head round to the left of the castle, not over the bridge, you will see the sign for La Tanière du Dragon. There is also a shop inside the castle selling jewellery and crystal, and sometimes you can watch someone making glass roses.

The nighttime show, Illuminations, is mainly projected onto the front of the castle. It starts at park closing - currently 11pm - and it’s a good idea to take your place at least an hour before. There is a lot of projection, also fireworks and fountains, and as we left the park afterwards Mickey Mouse was standing on the balcony of the Main Street railway station waving and wishing everyone goodnight, which was a lovely touch.

 Royal Castle Stage

This is to the right of the castle, coming from Main Street, and there are currently two shows using it - Joyeux Anniversaire Disneyland Paris in the morning/lunchtime, and the Starlit Princess Waltz in the afternoon/evening. Both shows are mixed French and English. The first has a cast of different characters and they do a birthday song and one with sections for each of the lands in the park. The princess show features eight princesses, who dance, then their princes come on and they all dance together, because Disney knows how to give the people what they want. There are a few stone benches but you’ll need to get there fairly early to get one; otherwise you’ll end up sitting on the floor but Disneyland has the cleanest floors I’ve ever seen so whatever.

 Blanche-Neige et les Sept Nains (Snow White and the seven dwarves) 

This is a Snow White dark ride, which sounds lovely! But two years ago when I took a four year-old and a six year-old on it, by halfway through I was hugging them both and saying ‘I'm sorry, I'm sorry, just close your eyes, I'm sorry’ because they were fucking terrified. It opens with happy dwarves and woodland creatures, but then immediately heads into the dark woods, with scary trees lunging at you and the witch constantly appearing and a dungeon full of skeletons, one of which jumps right at you. Then a brief scene of Snow White and the Prince waving at you, then the ride is over and you have to stop everyone crying. You think I am exaggerating. I am not. What the hell were they playing at. Worse than the Phantom Manor because at least you expect that to be scary.

 Les Voyages de Pinocchio 

Now this is more the thing! A traditional dark ride, scenes from Pinocchio, jolly good stuff. Boys turning into donkeys, being eaten by a whale, just what you'd expect. Not that exciting but it is nice in a traditional sort of way

 Le Carrousel de Lancelot 

The first time we went to DLP as a family was in 2014, and we were only there one night and didn't have time to do everything. Several times we walked past this lovely carousel and I told the girls we'd do it later, but we never got round to it. When we returned in 2015 I said we'd go on the carousel first, marched straight into Fantasyland and it was surrounded by hoardings as it was being renovated. But this time! We went on it! First of all! And it was lovely. A lovely carousel with lots of horses that go up and down, as carousel horses should, I can’t stand it when you go on a carousel and your horse doesn’t even fucking move, but it’s okay because Disney understands me.

 Peter Pan’s Flight 

Another dark ride but you ride in a flying pirate ship, out of the nursery and over London to Neverland. Newly renovated and much more colourful and sparkly. Flying in a boat makes it that much more fun, until the ride breaks down, and everyone has to be evacuated, and you’re ten feet above Neverland and cast members have to help you down with ladders, and today it was warm so you wore a skirt, and your six-year-old was so very brave so you have to be brave too even though it is Surprisingly High. Walking back through the closed ride was awesome though and we rode the ride several other times without incident.

 Disneyland Railroad

Steam train that takes you round the park. We only went halfway on it on this trip, from Fantasyland through Discoveryland to Main Street, which is cool because you go through the top of It’s A Small World and you can wave at the boats; I think the other side through Frontierland has a Grand Canton tableau thing but I forget. The main problem is that if they only have one train on you can wait up to half an hour for it to come round again.

  Meet Mickey Mouse 

Here is where you can meet Mickey Mouse, all day, because why not. And they will take your picture. Does what it says on the tin. Can be quite a long queue but you’re inside and can watch cartoons on a big screen.

  Dumbo the Flying Elephant 

You sit in the elephant and there is a lever to make it go up and down. A bit of a slow loader so can build up quite a queue but I think an essential part of the Disney experience. Let the small child accompanying you believe that you get scared when it goes all the way up and it will vastly increase their enjoyment or maybe my daugher is just evil.

  Alice’s Curious Labyrinth 

Alice in Wonderland themed maze in two parts; the first is pretty much a walkthrough, with a few different paths and dead ends but it isn’t really possible to get lost; you run into the Caterpillar and the playing cards painting the roses red and can take a picture. After this section you can exit, or you can enter the Queen of Hearts maze, which is a proper maze, and has a castle in the middle that you can go up. A good arrangement as children are satisfied with the first section without having to risk spending time getting lost and frustrated. Only open during the middle of the day, I’m not sure why; when we were there it opened at 11am and closed at 5pm.

 Mad Hatter’s Tea Cups 

Another Disney classic and the canopy and lanterns are very pretty. You can turn the disc in the middle to make the cup spin faster, possibly while laughing maniacally….guys, I think my youngest daughter might be Slytherin

 Casey Jr - le Petit Train du Cirque (the little circus train)

 This is the circus train from Dumbo, and it shares space with the Fairy Tales boat ride; you can wave at the boats as you go round and see some of the scenes and the central castle. These two rides are set a little back from the rest of Fantasyland, behind Alice’s Labyrinth, and they close earlier for some reason (7pm while we were there, the rest of the park not closing until 11pm). This is a good little trainer rollercoaster and it plays the Casey Jr song all the way round, as it should.

 Le Pays des Contes de Fées (the land of fairy tales)

A boat ride past scenes from various fairy tales, some Disney (Beauty and the Beast, Tangled, Aladdin etc), some not (Peter and the Wolf, the Wizard of Oz etc). Nice and relaxing and plenty to look at. Not very exciting though and probably best for little ones.

 It’s a Small World

This is a goddamn classic and no Disney trip is complete without multiple rides, I am not even joking, I think we went on it four times on this trip? And a good time was had BY ALL (the good time is compulsory). This had been newly renovated and looks very shiny but WHY is the ceiling still just tiles? Why is it not painted black? There are even things that draw the eye upwards - kites in China, monkeys in Africa - and then it looks like an office building or something. Paint the ceiling! Black! It would be so easy!

 Princess Pavilion 

This is the place to meet a princess! It had changed a bit from our last visit - then, you queued up before it opened at ten and got a timed ticket to come back and see whichever princess was on duty. This time you just had to wait in the queue, but there was a sign saying which princess you would see, which was good because then we could decide whether to bother. If you have a Priority or Easy Access card you can go in the morning and get a timed ticket but they only have so many so best to go early. We saw Rapunzel one morning and my husband queued with our eldest daughter for two hours to see Aurora in the afternoon, which was 100% worth it because Aurora is her favourite and she hadn’t met her before and we have a photo of her face when she first saw her and I’m tearing up just thinking about it

 DISCOVERYLAND

 Buzz Lightyear Laser Blast 

This is a ride that is also a game! You have a laser gun and you have to shoot the targets with a Z on them to defeat Emperor Zurg. You get points for hitting the targets and it is possible to get very competitive. Every photo from this ride has me frowning in concentration. I always ride with a child and I always win. Because it’s a continuous loader, they have to stop it every now and again to help someone with reduced mobility, if this happens while you’re on the ride find the closest target and hit it over and over.

 Orbitron

Like the elephants but you ride in a rocket ship that goes up and down. I’m not good with heights and this seems to go very high and not be entirely stable? And you slide from side to side and I’m not super big on it. I’d rather ride the elephants again to be honest. It makes me uncomfortable and whenever I’m on it I just want to get off but other people love it so what do I know

 Videopolis Theatre 

This used to have an awesome Lion King show but now it is the Jedi Training Academy, which we didn’t do, but we did enjoy a performance from the Calidcott Musical Theatre Company while we were eating at the fast food restaurant that’s also in the building so that was nice.

 Star Tours: l’Aventure Continue 

This has all be redone and relaunched and it so much better! Not as rattly, 3D screens, and in theory you get a different ride each time (our first and second rides were different, the third was the beginning of the second with a different ending). It’s all in French which I suppose can’t be helped but did impact our enjoyment a bit. But very slick and I enjoyed it a lot.

 Starport 

We met Darth Vader! That was nice. He was a bit scary but we were brave.

 Hyperspace Mountain

Space Mountain but skinned as a Star Wars ride - I’m not sure if that’s permanent, as a lot of the Jules Verne-esque theming was still in place, but it was fun. The ride now has space battles, big screens with spaceships and lots of lasers and sound effects, pew pew pew. I think at the beginning it says you’re flying to Jakku? But my French isn’t good enough. We didn’t realise until the last day this was open in Extra Magic Hours or might have gone on it more, but did manage six rides between us which was pretty good (I rode with eldest daughter twice, and she rode with my husband twice, youngest daughter not being tall enough to join us).

 Autopia 

Little cars that you drive along the track; there is a steering wheel but you don’t have to steer properly if you’re lazy or six years old. Someone over 1.32m has to control the pedal. You have a little drive through the countryside then you spend ages queuing up to get back to the platform to disembark. Eldest can drive the car herself and loves it, youngest can’t reach the pedal but loves to steer or at least try to.

 ADVENTURELAND

 Pirates of the Caribbean 

Is still closed for refurbishment which is a BIG PILE OF POO. This is youngest’s favourite ride and we couldn’t do it. So it gets ZERO POINTS.

 Indiana Jones and the Temple of Peril 

Mine car rollercoaster, a bit rattly and jerky but good fun, has one 360 loop. Good theming, tucked away right at the back of Adventureland. I think for a few years they ran this backwards? But it’s forwards again now.

 La Passage Enchante d’Aladdin 

A walkthrough with scenes from Aladdin. This was closed on our last visit but this time we all enjoyed going up Aladdin’s Enchanted Passage.

  FRONTIERLAND

 Phantom Manor

This is the Haunted Mansion. A bit hard to follow the story if you don’t speak French, something about a bride? She keeps turning up, certainly. Another Disney classic and I know I shouldn’t keep complaining about the language barrier when I’m the one who willingly went to a foreign country but it does make it not as good as at the American parks, for me.

 Thunder Mesa Riverboat Landing

You can ride the riverboat round Big Thunder Mountain. Pretty slow and not enough seats and we didn’t bother on this trip. There are some tableaux along the side of the lake, mostly on the outside, so stand on that side of the boat if you want to see them.

 Big Thunder Mountain 

Mine cart rollercoaster, has been updated with new scenes including a dynamite blasting section, top stuff. The ride loads on the side of the lake and most of the track is on the island, so you immediately plunge into a pitch-black tunnel before surfacing to climb and go round and round, then back through a black tunnel full of bats to the platforms. Just the kind of thing I like and it’s got even better since our last visit.

  WALT DISNEY STUDIOS

 BACKLOT

 Rock’n’Roller Coaster starring Aerosmith

A rollercoaster in the dark, with loud music and flashing lights. Launch start. Very fast, don’t put your head against the headrest or it’ll get rattled to pieces, I like it but it’s very intense and the theming seems a little bit dated now.

 Moteurs...Action! Stunt Show Spectacular featuring Lightning McQueen

We saw this on our last trip but not this one. Quite long and didn’t seem to know if it wanted to be a stunt show, or a Cars show, or showing film special effects, but good if you like that sort of thing.

 PRODUCTION COURTYARD

 Studio Tram Tours: Behind the Magic

You ride in a tour tram thing and see some props from such blockbuster hits as Dinotopia, Reign of Fire and Pearl Harbour, none of which I’ve seen, has anybody? But there’s a bit where they show special effects with rain and fire and a flood which was quite cool. Sit towards the right of the car if you don’t want to get wet. But it was a hot day so we didn’t mind. Needed more to look at as some parts of the road were empty and that was a bit dull.

 Disney Junior Live on Stage! 

We saw this on our last two trips but not this one as our two are growing out of Disney Junior a bit, and the show badly needs updating. There are alternating French and English shows so check the times.

 TOON STUDIO

 Animagique Theatre

The current show here is Mickey and the Magician. We had to queue for about half an hour before the show but it was well worth it, it was a very good show with live singing, magic tricks, lots of songs and dancing. In general, Mickey speaks French and the other characters speak English, but the plot isn’t complicated and is mainly an excuse to show songs from different Disney films. The theatre is also air-conditioned and has comfortable padded seats which was almost worth the wait by itself.

 Cars Quatre Roues Rallye

Similar to the Teacups, but you’re sat in a Car and they move round each other in a figure-of-eight and you keep thinking you’re going to collide but not quite doing it. In theory each car seats four but my husband and I are average-sized and only just fit side-by-side in the back row of the car. Good fun though and doesn’t make you as dizzy as the teacups, not me anyway.

 Crush’s Coaster 

This is AWESOME and probably my favourite from this trip. The rollercoaster car is shaped like a turtle shell, with two seats facing forward and two back, but once you get into the rollercoaster section it spins so you’re facing forward, backward, this way and that way. Starting off forwards you see more of the shark, starting off backwards you see the jellyfish better, but it doesn’t matter once you get past the first few scenes and into the East Australian Current, which is a dark rollercoaster section with spinning lights and occasional turtles. Smooth except for when it rights you at the end which can be a bit jarring. Top stuff.

 Les Tapis Volants - Flying Carpets Over Agrabah 

The thing about this ride, which is like the elephants again but with flying carpets, is that it should clearly be in Adventureland in the main park, which has a big area themed for Aladdin, but I’d guess there isn’t room for it, so it’s in the Studios park, with the genie there and supposed to be directing a film? It doesn’t make a lot of sense. The ride itself is good though, smooth and quite fast. Nice breeze on a hot day.

 Art of Disney Animation 

This building currently has an area where you can meet Belle - don’t believe the times in the programme, she was here all day, with a long queue (again, if you have a Priority/Easy Access card you can get a timed ticket but get there early as they only have so many). There is also an exhibition of Disney concept art and, my favourite part, an area with little desks shaped like the bottom half of Mickey Mouse and a cast member who teaches you to draw a Disney character. We all drew Stitch. The drawing bit was a nice change of pace and also I got to show off a bit and the cast member said my picture was very good, she really did, no honestly

 Ratatouille: L’Aventure Totalement Toquée de Remy

This was my favourite ride on our last trip and it is still my second-favourite (Crush’s Coaster, which we didn’t ride last time, has just pipped it). You wear 3d glasses and ride in a little rat and it is all very slick and immersive. Half in English and half in French but not much dialogue so it’s easy to follow.

  TOY STORY PLAYLAND

 Toy Soldiers Parachute Drop

You sit under a parachute which goes up, then drops, four times over I think. I didn’t ride this one but I was informed that it is higher than it looks and you have a great view; it feels secure as it drops; and that it is very good.

 Slinky Dog Zigzag Spin

My husband won’t ride this one as it gives him a headache but my head, which can be delicate, doesn’t mind it. The dog goes round and round and a bit up and down. Quite bumpety and you get pushed to the side of the car.

[lorettalivingston6911]

White House Correspondents Dinner 2018: Michelle Wolf Draws Praise, Criticism For Speech — Including SCATHING Blows To Sarah Huckabee Sanders

people always ask me if I've been getting Botox

Michelle Wolf made all the headlines after last night's White House Correspondents Dinner in D.C., as her set touched on everything in Washington with humor and a few biting comments... and reaction from across the spectrum is now accusing her of going too far!

The 19-minute speech focused on Donald Trump and his administration, including PR flack Sarah Huckabee Sanders, and as you can see in her full remarks (above), Wolf did NOT hold back in going after Sanders, sitting just a few seats away at the table.

Related: Melania Trump Is 'Really Fun' But 'Can't Go Outside'

There was plenty of Twitter reaction to the whole thing, too -- we'll get to that in just a second (below) -- but first, ch-ch-check out two other video highlights from last night's WHCD, first starting with our cartoon president:

Ha!!!

Related: Trump Makes Flub In Speech Because He's 'Exhausted'!

And followed up with Trump's reaction to the whole thing, during his rally in Michigan last night (below):

Hmmm...

Why, again, does a sitting President need to do rallies for his base in the middle of his administration when he should be, you know, governing?

Wait, don't tell us. We know the answer.

Related: John Legend Tries To School Kanye On Trump

Anyways, Twitter wasn't short on reacting to the showdown between Wolf and Sanders. Here are all the highlights (below):

A lot of people are whining "what if a man made fun of a woman’s makeup" in relation to Michelle Wolf and it’s like, my dudes, you guys elected that man — Mike Drucker (@MikeDrucker) April 29, 2018

The most offensive line in Michelle Wolf’s routine was "Flint still doesn’t have clean water;" if something else she said bothers you more than that then maybe we shouldn’t trust your judgment about anything. — ana marie cox (@anamariecox) April 29, 2018

It's funny how the same people who condemned Michelle Wolf as a part of the Hollywood "coastal elite" celebrity culture at the #WHCD last night were quick to embrace celebrity rapper Kanye West Kardashian last week when he spoke up for B-list Hollywood celebrity Donald Trump. — Keith Boykin (@keithboykin) April 29, 2018

The more I think about it, the more impressed I am that Michelle Wolf did such a harsh act WITHOUT insulting any woman's looks. She aimed straight at the white female enforcers & never once suggested that anyone was a bimbo or a dog—like the man they work for surely would have. — Emily Nussbaum (@emilynussbaum) April 29, 2018

Every tweet I see from journalists coming to the defense of Sarah Huckabee Sanders makes more and more adamant that the only way to fix what's broken is by replacing the entire press corps with Michelle Wolf — Ashley Feinberg (@ashleyfeinberg) April 29, 2018

If conservatives really thought Michelle Wolf insulted women and mocked their appearance, they would have elected her president — Jessica Valenti (@JessicaValenti) April 29, 2018

Barack Obama managed to laugh at exceptionally painful birtherism at WHCD- a grievous lie fueled by the man Sarah Huckabee Sanders defends every day.

But people think Michelle Wolf was too brutal just because Sanders didn't laugh.

It's no wonder we are in such trouble. — Sarah Reese Jones (@PoliticusSarah) April 29, 2018

I genuinely believe Michelle Wolf was hacked last night and did not say those things about Sarah Sanders at #WHCD — Jack Posobiec (@JackPosobiec) April 29, 2018

Michelle Wolf did great. If it had been me, there wouldn't even have been jokes - just me pointing at each of them and saying, "Go fuck yourself." — Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack) April 29, 2018

There were two speeches last night:

Michelle Wolf - "Sarah Huckabee Sanders tells lies"

Trump- "Mexico is World War Z and I will shut the country down if Congress doesn’t pay for my wall"

Press Coverage - MICHELLE WOLF IS A MONSTER — Robin Thede (@robinthede) April 29, 2018

Let me make sure I got this right...

Michelle Wolf roasted Sarah Huckabee Sanders on a platform where roasting is expected and she is getting criticism...

Minutes earlier Donald Trump threatened a Senator in front of thousands and gets no criticism...

This is sad. — Tony Posnanski (@tonyposnanski) April 29, 2018

Sarah Huckabee Sanders isn't a fucking victim.

She chose to work for Trump, as spokesperson for the most powerful political office in the world.

She chose to shamelessly lie everyday to the American people in service to Trump.

Glad we had this talk, @maggieNYT. — Pé Resists (@4everNeverTrump) April 29, 2018

Nobody gives Sarah Huckabee Sanders credit for dealing w/that apostate press room every day while the other Sister Wives get to rest at home in the compound. — John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) April 29, 2018

Shameful! Sarah Huckabee Sanders went to the WHCD to be gently ribbed about constantly lying to the American people to defend this awful administration, not roundly mocked! — Patrick Monahan (@pattymo) April 29, 2018

The worst part of Michelle Wolf’s garbage performance last night wasn’t her nasty riff on Huckabee Sanders. It was that dumpster fire abortion joke. But few were as offended by her literally celebrating baby killing as they were by her knocking eye shadow. — Ben Shapiro (@benshapiro) April 29, 2018

Sarah Huckabee Sanders is a bad person, and should be reminded that others think she’s a bad person. — audible gasp (@morninggloria) April 29, 2018

Inneresting!!

What do U think, Perezcious readers?!

Let us know in the comments (below)!!!

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