#i cant make right decisions like this
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Any tips on sleeping that actually work?
#sleep#help#why doesnt it come back#awake at 3 4 5#from 11#i cant live like this#cant move forward#took benadryl#worked 1 night#woke up 5 last night benadryl#feel reallly weir#d#slow reaction time#bad for everything#need mind!!!!!#not zombi#e#i want to feel like a person#like yesterday when i woke up at 6:40#i need at least 7 hrs#6 ok#5... gets bad#i dont want to be on meds#desperate#too tired to go to dr#dr wants me on meds... vested interest..#i cant make right decisions like this#i dont eat sugar or caffeine after 1 pm#i used to sleep 8hrs fine before sleeping pills-- sleep got bad bc pain#pain again... been getting less
0 notes
Text
And some days, I just wish you wouldn't look at me at all.
#ffxiv#sketch#wol#meteor survivor#zenos yae galvus#adventurer zenos#oh no#its the consequences of his actions#everything is fine until the only man on the star you care about looks at you with the same contempt your father did#(Meteor's not doing it intentionally- its a reflex after he comes back for quite a bit)#and zenos is getting bodied because its been a while since... you know... him being able to really feel anything at all#and no- its not him regretting anything that had to do with varis- just him regretting the thought meteor could look at him like that#little does Meteor know he's emotionally bodying the man he's trying to be cordial with#its a little okay because in how I write adventurer zenos this serves as one of his main wake-up calls to make some changes#and realizing both the mistakes he's made with meteor and that meteor hating him in any way is actually -not at all- what he wants#but not okay on the end that every time meteor does this he has to watch zenos actively dissociate right in front of him#until zenos just kinda autopilots and walks away#the second time (or perhaps third) in the last 11 years that zenos has felt regret to any major capacity-#on meteor's end I just enjoy seeing the progression of the WoL through subtext#and why meteor is willing to even entertain the idea despite how much he hates zenos- his decisions and the path he's walked#is the realization that there is high chance that he could actually be a direct catalyst for zenos' growth#and the realization the wol has that they were the only one zenos has ever genuinely reached out to#besides- i just like the idea of having your equal other half fighting back to back with you- or being able to handle threats you cant#and i find their dynamic neat- of meteor not forgiving zenos but giving him his last chance- and growing to enjoy being around him#and zenos being able to work on moving past being the weapon or the monster- finding the connections he's longed for#and giving himself purpose to finally truly just live- for him to learn to experience and have the freedom to find what he enjoys#(and curiously him having estinien's brand of accidently helping people even in StB gives me ideas...)#but enough tag ranting- ill get to zenos' actual adventuring in another post lol
201 notes
·
View notes
Note
girl get up he is literally just a man. allah is telling you to leave him. rise above.
#my sister said the same thing i know ur right like i KNOW........ i'm not standing on business and its making it worse i guess idk#bro today was so bad i took 5 bathroom breaks at work to cry#and then i called him (i know bad decision) crying and said i want him back and he said he misses me like crazy but he cant#and then i sobbed on the subway home and this girl gave me a wad of tissues i hope that kindness returns to her TENFOLD#i'm going to stop contacting him i need to stop but oh my godggggggggddddddd my godddddddd MY GODDDDDDD
73 notes
·
View notes
Text
First time using a poll soo uhhhh which one of these thumbnails should I attempt to make into an animated background??
#poll#delete later#sans#taking advantage of the poll feature because lord knows i cant make a decision to save my life#idk let me know if this is a thing i should do in future#im kinda liking 5 for the vibes but it feels more like ufsans??#i wanna animate something :3#i mean if you have any other suggestions lemme know too#i'm gonna be putting a lot of time into it so i want to get it right lolol#sketch#thumbnails#mine#queued#dont look too hard at the perspective please fhaksjfasf#ill fix it later i swear :')))
107 notes
·
View notes
Text
im gonna level w you, fellow medic mains. you are a lot worse at the game than you think
#not me though i fucking rock#jk i suck ass#but i mean this in a way where i know what its like#just heal ppl. pop an uber. etc.#its more abt decision making and choosing the right patient#and doing it right will win most games#but bc of this you will start thinking youre incredibly important and cant be replaced#and so the attitude of medic mains#myself included#becomes insufferable#“protect me all medpacks are mine impress me kill for me i wont uber you unless you are worthy”#meanwhile they leave anyone who isnt a heavy to die#i beg you play other classes find a main that isnt medic to get you into the action#preferably classes on the front line#itll make you a better medic if you know what the recieving end of the healing beam feels like#you will notice who the medics tend to heal over others#you will notice bad ubers and coward medics that give up on you and abandon you#you will notice their mistakes and itll affect you#its helped me get better#im slowly figuring out what to do for soldiers#tgeyre the hardest to pocket gor but its pure magic when it goes right#i main demoman and medics are allergic to me in the field man
55 notes
·
View notes
Text
Lace, possessed and speaking directly to Rook: You took everything from us, and you thought you won. But we're still here. We will endure. In spite of you.
Lucanis: 😌🙂↕️😌🙂↕️
Spite, from behind Lucanis' eye: 😂😈👹
Rook: 😐🫥😶🌫️
Solas, from behind Rooks eye: ✌️🙂😔
#im sorry but giving the elves white guilt was a very funny plot twist i didnt see coming pfpfppf#datv#solas#rook#lace harding#datv spoilers#solas: yn what u got me there#and then making the SOURCE of the guilt right there come with us but just enough that he cant upset anyone#but gets to hear the weight of every fuck ass decision he made lmao#yeahhhh bitch u go back to ur room and THINK about what uve doney!#GO TO UR ELUVIAN RRIGHT NOW BITCH#can we adtually keep solas post game...hes like a little ancient problematic tomagotchi#lucanis wants to keep spite well rook wants to keep solas#HES MINE I HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY TO MAKE SURE HE DOESNT WREAK HAVOC#works for both lucanis and rook#come get ur freak of a man hes doing things— no i set him loose#also works for both lucanis and spite and solas and rook lmao
22 notes
·
View notes
Note
if we're talking about weird ways the prequel movies handled raven and erik, i still can't really get over how they
- made a huge plot point of first class physical mutations
- erased erik's physical mutation (his white hair)
- made raven's opinion on her physical mutation that she doesn't wanna hide it
- then proceed to have her shapeshifted and hide it almost constantly
- then gave quicksilver and polaris their unnatural hair colors that they should have inherited from erik
it's just hilarious to me. i wanna see the talks that lead to these decisions.
i think At Most i can justify raven hiding her true form as a way to protect herself and/or because she's insecure: evidently a lot of people dont act kindly to blue scaled women (tho i did wish she showed her true form more while at the cia base with the other mutants) and it's fair to assume that even if she wants to be out and proud she has some apprehension about it because of Aforementioned safety/confidence issues
everything else tho yeah LOL whats all this then. wasnt in the budget i support- tho i stilllll so badly wish that they at least let erik's hair go white in apocalypse ..... that woulda been cool at least .....
#snap chats#quicksilver having his silver hair could be justified in-universe as him dyeing it or something#i dont know. i cant speak for the decisions made when making these movies vjALKVAKJV#like if we reaaaalllyy wanna talk bout weird things the movies did i think my weirdest bits would be charles' family#i dont know why they had it be implied charles and his mother werent on good terms when it was pretty much the opposite in comics#i mean there really was no reason why raven couldnt shift into kurt marco but whatever#then its kinda funny how cain is just. Not Really Relevant. his family ties to charles isnt really relevant if i remember right#tho on that note it couldve been funny/horrifying if cain had to grow up with raven AND charles#congratulations you have two mutant siblings to hate now. jesus cjerLKAERERJ#BUT yeah. my cope at least is that these movies are their own isolated universes so w/e the canon is then ill take it#i do wish we got white hair erik tho. ill mourn that forever i fear. also mystique's cool outfit i wish we got that but mOVING ON
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
why do i love the conflict more than anything else . the misery . the incompatibility that spreads like oil slick . wanting so desperately for resolution that never comes . hmmm
#its the allure of like . mismatch btwn right person / wrong time . maybe in personal development and such#or wrong person / right time and trying 2 make it work but the circumstances are set 2 separate you#i think the guilt ford harbors over his relationship w fidds is good and i think hes had a lot of reflection . 30 yrs at least#but i dont rly care for like a . HELPP SRY IM LIKE talking to myself#i dont rly care ‘if’ they got back tgether in the end#fanon wise or whagever obviouslyy . no avrually emma-may kicking fidds out over the xmas thing its over HELPPPP#i feel like i always hve to clarify bc then theres that one guy whos like ‘smth smth you cant read . ooc loser .’idgaf . not gaffing today#i think mcguckets decision to forgive him is rly sweet And i do like the recognition of .. the whole incident being a misstep on both their#parts ykwim ? like ford was an ass for sureee but also mcgucket + memory gun was his own autonomous detriment#but#no i cant read the other tags i was writing i forgot where i was at#anyways im so obsessed w like . this being such an imperfect event with imperfect equals#ford theory and fidds the mechanics . which brw im also obsessed w how That is revered in canon .#but yeah like imperfect event imperfect people who shared an incredible connecfion in my freaking mind#that was ultimately squandered to fords pride and fidds reticence#ugh like i love the rise and fall i love the strenght of their connection generally corroding over time#its just such a cool motivator for both themselves and like its a history they share together and post weirdmageddon get to finally think a#knowing now what they didnt have the tools to recognize then#idk.^__^ they r so crazy to me . playing w them like dolls in my head#fiddleford mcgucket#stanford pines#gravity falls#every time i think ab this wrt every challeneged dynamic i think ab mars in the discord#talking ab x and y charas epic divorce arc#and im not even saying this to discredit Good relationships in media#bc those have a wealth of fun and interesting concepts or dynamics to dive into#its just something ab like . poetry of anger bro . and how love and hate can feel so similar and be borne from the same place#how one can transform into the other and back again due to . idk whatevee the hell theyve got going on^#prev post got me wishing we had more meat to the fallout#or that it was extended in content or scope . i want 2 see how they dealt with losing the other and then
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
i want a melissa/shauna sex scene but melissa keeps switching to jackie like when nat kept switching to lottie in edible complex or like this scene from last night in soho
#first shauna is on top of melissa and then she pulls away and sees jackie under her asking ‘whats wrong shipman’#then she blinks hard and its back to melissa asking if shes okay but it like flashes like in severance woes hallow with helena and gemma#then its back to jackie and shauna gets way more into it and THEN it does that switching thing#and maybe it ends with shauna moaning jackies name and melissa realizes what is happening#god theres so much jackieshauna potential now i cant get over it#this show makes me question my decision to go into photography professionally instead of filmmaking#cuz i wanna write and direct this scene right now so bad#yellowjackets#jackieshauna
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
I watched Avengers: Age of Ultron (apart from I skipped some overly long action sequences) and I am not sure so can someone tell me whether or not Tony Stark was the baddy in that film? Because about halfway through I was sure he was but then it was maybe just an evil robot after all and I am confused because either this film was surprisingly subversive or it was about robots hitting each other.
#I CANT STAND THE CONFUSION IN MY MIND#also i get why people wrote wanda/sylvie. they should go on a wholesome chick-flick revenge-quest together. and also they should kiss.#also i am now only *half* joking about thor being in love with mjolnir#it kept doing Christianity Bits which was quite awks.#not sure why it used the bit about building the church on a rock for some metal i mean wasn't jesus making a pun there? about peter?#i think Vision might be Jesus? or else he's Dr Manhattan who's done a first year philosophy course. could go either way on that tbh.#BUT TONY WAS THE BADDY RIGHT? WAS HE? WAS TONY THE BADDY OR NOT????#with the homocidal glitches in what he thinks is his winning personality?#and all the weapons he's made and is in fact still making but now he only sells them to The Good Guys?#except look how easily they fall out with each other and also don't a lot of innocent bystanders die in their overly long action scenes?#also i need to write fic about whether mjolnir does in fact obey some unknown code that can be cracked if you set your mind to it#she does like Robot Jesus so apparently we can rely on her to make the major decisions from now on#the ending's a bit ominous - apparently someone's collecting those TVA paperweights to do... something? Oh no! :O#yeah i watched the MCU in the wrong order shut up this was inevitable and Marvisney should just embrace that at this point#(i know 'Marvisney' will never catch on but that will not stop me using it)#the loki series ending is but the latest installment of “unlimited power with no oversight is fine as long as the Good people have it”#UNLESS TONY WAS ACTUALLY THE BADDY. WHICH AS I MENTIONED I AM NOT AT ALL CLEAR ON.#maybe what i mean is was tony stark the baddy *on purpose*?#i only picked this one to watch next because tumblr gifsets told me thor wears a nice coat in it#which he does! but only for a small fraction of the film :(#journey into the mcu#the avengers (the marvel ones not the other ones)
54 notes
·
View notes
Text
i read this one uu fic where ash knows tht spoke is spoke inthe mafia episode and its lkke him giving spoke a ceremony outfit and its kinda gay with all of the caressing and shit but idk if i like them that way Id prefer to see them in a toxic platonic way but the author might make them kiss if they make a sequel but ill pretend that its a cheek kiss instead if they do
#its a shame cuz its my fav fic so far#but if they do oh well I wont complain i wont be mean it might be kinda weird cuz spoke is 17 inthink Oh wow hes a year older tha me thats#crazy ngl not sure how to process that but#I really liked the fic because it was so good in making ash manipulative but also I dont have much to complain over#I wouldve said that spokes too dumbed down in the fic but hes stupid in uu#well not stupid I need to stop using that word so freely its moreso uhrr#He struggles with making decisions quickly and processing things and that causes people(ash) to take advantage of him#in ls hes the leader in uu he follows#really visible with him and mapicc 'Follow me me me!' 'Lets go go go!'#I do love the fic a lot I really want to see how the ceremony would play out#because ashalso fkrced spoke to drink aglass of milk and told him not to go invis and i assume theres gonna be multiple invis players#which would be reallyyyy interesting#Lkke the guy with the biggest mark on his head is getting a ceremony. something no other diamond player has got. this guy that everyone has#been told to kill on sight is rigth next to ash sorta like a right hand man situation but he doesn't have a say in anything it kinda plays#more into spoke being some sort of thropy but i dont want to objectify him in my mind cuz thats ickyyyyy#ash : I cant stop winning#!#I want to see ash make spoke come with him when hes taunting parrot loke inthe recent uu episode#I reallly loved that#I might become an uu ash fan but In our system we have a uu mapicc (named mape cuz we got 2 mapiccs) So When he finds out i like ash#hes gonna get mad but like I dont support his actions theyre clearly bad and flawed and evil like ls wemmbu but i csnt bring myself but to#like them#I say as I remember the evil alter forming sensation in my brain#We already got ls wemmbu Dont tell me were gonna get uu ash inhere too#Ohhh god this is gonna be so fucking bad#text
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
dude im watching hbg's plagiarism video and like. ohhhhh god
#i cant even like. its so ridiculous#i ignored the james somerton discourse (quote unquote) when it was relevant bc i never had time to look into it#i forget how sucky people can be about plagiarism. thats my one thought#i'll look a little more into it later since i do remember a couple decent points about the plagiarism video.#but right now i can just say harry makes a pretty good point about how redudant some plagiarizers' decisions can be#idk. im babbling this is my online journal nobody looks at
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
i always have wayy too many ideas in my head but one that i am certain would go hard is the jess and amy swap with jay and alex au
#LIKE PLEASEEE#I NEED ME A SCARY LITTLE BLONDE LADY#and since girl friendship is just. Different. it wouldnt be like jay and alex weird s2 moment#its still weird but amy would go for a more 'hehe we're friends right? :) u can trust me girl u WILL go to this scary ass place w me :))!'#jessica is like jay though and cant make her own decisions (when it comes to amy anyways) and trusts her much more than she should#masky sarah.... Yeah.#theres no fourth lady so brian can stay brian i guess#bahaha the idea that if it were amys movie shed still have picked him for the lead role is funny
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
most days I'm so chill with the fact I'm non-contact with my father, it was the best decision, I hate him, my life is so much more peaceful without him
then bam it's a random Tuesday at 8pm and I'm sobbing because I miss having a dad, like, excuse me what is this??
#im ping ponging between its all his fault he made all those decisions to maybe he was doing what he thought was right#i barely ever had a dad so i dont know what im crying for pff#if he died tomorrow I'm not sure I'd go to his funereal I don't want him at my wedding#but sometimes I want him to just hold me and read me narnia like he did when I was 9#my parents were terrible but its cause they didnt know what they were doing but i dont know how to make peace with that#would it have killed them to be nice to me?#this is very simplified but yk#gonna go read some draco scorpius centred fanfics now to make me cry more cant wait!!#i hate him i hate him i HATE HIM I HATE HIM#but i didnt always and i dont want to but there are things you just cant take back#anywayz thats enough trauma dumping on main lmfao#if anyone has any father child centred fanfictions do let me know and give them to me plz thanks#daddy issues#are screaming#scorpius malfoy#and god do i hate his new wife#this is way too many tags im sorry to anyone whos made it down here lmfao
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
the way theyre so out of sync with each in where they are in the relationship (stede is 100% in but ed is hurt and overwhelmed, whereas when they first kissed ed was 100% in but stede was overwhelmed) but they're so weirdly in sync in their view of themself (ed desperately wants to be someone different to improve his view of himself but doesnt know what that is and stede is trying so hard to be different, to be his idealised view of himself - a pirate - even if that doesnt suit him) and when they move too fast theyre liable to just run away (stede to mary, ed to a fishing boat) they keep coming back to each other theyre always circling each other they absolutely love each other but theyre both so bad at dealing with it
#im very intrigued to see what'll change next episode to make them come back together again#ed knew he would be overwhelmed if they fucked but put his feelings to the side because stede was hurting. it wasnt the right decision for#either of them but they're. they're so whim prone when emotions run high they're liable to do anything. ough i cant wait to see how they#like. settle their emotions enough to get together and stay together.#but i know we'll have to waut until f UCKING S3. godamnit#ofmd spoilers
23 notes
·
View notes
Note
Thinking you shouldn't have to pay for Watcher content is you being entitled, actually.
did i ever say i shouldn’t have to pay for it? no, i said it’s disappointing that i would now have to after years of it being free. it would be easier to take if they were completely changing and upgrading their shows or established that the stream wouldn’t just have their current shows and maybe discontinued ones, that it would be different from their youtube channel and worth the sudden charge, but it’s hard not to feel like they’re throwing their audience under the bus
#from what weve seen the shows will still have the same number of episodes so we arent even getting more of the same content#just nebulous ‘better’ content which could mean anything and also nothing when the shows have gradually started to feel overproduced#it is my and anyone elses right to be disappointed by this#and its a personal choice#if you think its worth the money or if youre in a place where you can afford another service then thats wonderful and i hope you enjoy it#but that doesnt make it any less tone deaf to say we as a company need more money when people cant afford to eat#plenty of creators have successfully crowdfunded their own shows without putting all of it behind a paywall#critical role immediately comes to mind#they have literal thousands of hours of content for free and when it came time to ask for money people showed up for them#the answer didnt have to be put everything on a streaming service when there were plenty of other options#its also just a bad business decision but i dont have the expertise to talk about that#tldr people are allowed to feel however they want about this#also acting like its somehow more ‘authentic’ to get money from your audience#instead of advertisers and sponsors who can actually afford it is sus as hell im just saying#mailbox#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#watcher#shane madej#ryan bergara#steven lim
17 notes
·
View notes