#i can't identify with it i can use it i can't remember it without feeling pain

[puppyudderly-dreamy]

sometimes i wish i could feel the "get use out of it before it's gone" mentality i've seen some girls have abt bottom surgery cuz i feel like it'd make my time in waiting less uncomfortable and dysphoric but i always fall short whenever i try. idk i don't think there's some evil air of penis about my genitals or anything but i still can't conceive of them as mine, i didn't ask for this, it was forced on me in every sense to have my anatomy be this way and i find no joy in what i can do with it. and i don't wanna treat it like an other because that's just dumb and can lead to some bad thinking but i also don't think it's representative of me considering how unhappy it makes me being associated with it idk i just sometimes wish i could be the kinda girl that wants to fuck one last time or make a mold of it or smthn but i just can't cuz if i were to do that personally id be making memories of an aspect forced on me that made me nothing but unhappy and the only thing that has ever alleviated that feeling is thinking of the day it's changed getting closer. idk why im so insecure abt it i guess i just feel like my kind of bottom dysphoria is old fashioned or belies a thinking of internalized transmisogyny because ive never met another girl who feels the way i do

[444lotus]

how i manifested (+revised) my dream body ౨ৎ

This is my first post on my new account, though I am NOT new to the law and NOT new to loablr either. This post is specifically about how I manifested my dream body instantly with no technique besides knowing :)

PART ONE - the old story

In the old story, I was so fixated on my body and my weight all of the time, I was tracking my calories and weighing myself and my food obsessively and constantly gaining and losing weight. Back then, my beliefs were that 1) Excess food causes weight gain, 2) If I don't track my food and weigh myself, I will become too fat/skinny, and 3) There is something wrong with my body, and I need to diet/exercise to fix it.

Noticing these beliefs were key to changing the way I viewed food and my body, and therefore changing how I knew food to effect me and how I knew my body to be.

When I was overweight, I knew my body was too big, I knew I was eating too much, I knew excess calories made me gain weight. When I was underweight, I knew I had no appetite, I knew I was too bony, I knew that exercise makes you gain muscle which is why I had none, etc. I had to identify the limiting beliefs that made me know my body was a certain way.

PART TWO - writing the new story

Once I identified the beliefs that were holding me back and kept me from my goals ("I know I eat too much, even if I affirm I'm skinny, I'm still going to gain weight."), I could then change them. I wrote down a list of these beliefs, like I did above, and came up with reversals. For example;

"I overeat, so I will gain weight" -> "Calories aren't even real, so I can eat whatever I want and stay the same weight."

"I eat junk food, so I'll never be skinny" -> "I love how fast my metabolism is, I can eat junk all day and still stay so skinny." or "Junk food is just like other foods. Raspberries can't make me fat so neither can hamburgers."

"I don't exercise enough to be toned" -> "It's crazy how I'm naturally so toned and fit without trying."

The key for me was changing key beliefs that kept me dieting and exercising to lose weight, to sever the tie between calories consumed and weight, and hours exercising and muscles. These are limiting beliefs. We literally create our reality. Not ice cream, not soda and chips, none of that can overcome YOU as a divine creator. It sounds silly when you spell it out like that, doesn't it?

PART THREE - how i did it

Okay, now we understand that the secret is to change the rules of our own reality to allow us to know a higher truth (my higher truth? I am a skinny legend). So how do we put this into practice?

All you have to do is know. You set these rules, so you know they are true, reality is bound to them. You must know you are successful, know that reality is in the 4d, and feel truly satisfied in that realm. You can do this using whatever method you need to, but personally, I just knew deep within me that I was my ideal weight, and that nothing could change that, that is simply the reality, that is simply the way things are. I thought about old pictures I took of myself, and remembered how skinny I looked in them, I thought about the last time I saw my friends and how much littler they said I'd gotten, I thought about the last time I stood on the scale and how it read the exact weight I knew myself to be. And I just knew, deep within me, that was simply how things were.

And the last step, for me, was to feel truly joyful at this realization. To feel satisfied it came into fruition. Without seeking confirmation, because I already KNEW.

And what do you know? Pictures of myself in my phone from weeks ago, they were my ideal body. The girl I saw in the mirror when I stood up from my meditation? She had my ideal body. My clothes? XS and S, all of them. I had revised my ideal body all the way back to the day I bought them. And confirmed this by checking pictures I took in the dressing room.

I'm telling you right now it is possible if you know in your heart you've always had your desire. It's always been fulfilled within you. You make the rules because you are a divine creator. Nothing outside of you can change what you know to be true.

That's all for now ౨ৎ

[aptericia]

Not proud to be here.

--

Ok, here goes draft like 5 of this fucking post. I spent 4 hours tossing and turning in bed last night thinking about this, and then this morning I found a tumblr post that really helped me understand what I was trying to say.

The post talks about how aromantic "advocates" claim that "aros don't take up resources, so there's no reason not to include them!" And if that's actually what people believe, I think I can finally articulate why it is that I feel so alienated in queer spaces.

It's because aspecs in general aren't "welcomed" by much of the queer community. We're tolerated. We perhaps get the luxury of not being contradicted on our own identities, or not being specifically kicked out of LGBTQ-only spaces, but that's the whole point: what we get out of the queer "community" is people NOT doing things, not actually doing things FOR us. And that, frankly, is not enough. We deserve conversations about us. We deserve to have others consider our feelings, even when making lighthearted jokes. We deserve varied, respectful representation in media. We deserve the active deconstruction of amatonormativity in society. We deserve to have space made for us, rather than at most being told we should "go take up more space!" ourselves.

Of course, the reality is that my being aspec is a personal matter that does not inherently affect anyone else. But the same can be said for literally any queer identity. Your being gay doesn't say anything about me, so of course I shouldn't hurt you for it, but why should I help you either? Because your happiness and comfort are important. The same goes for aspecs.

And most of the time, I don't even need anyone to make space for or expend resources on me; I can live fine in everyday, non-queer-specific places without mentioning my identity at all. But it's the queer community that claims it will make that space for me, doesn't, and then acts defensive and morally pure if I call out the hypocrisy because "we're queer too, you can't erase our identities to advocate for yours!!!!"

Again, this post isn't about specifics. I have queer friends who are incredibly thoughtful and supportive about my identity, just as I have non-queer friends who are. I find more solidarity in aspec-only communities, as well as trans/genderqueer ones, although there are still many exceptions. This post is also not about amatonormative ideology, which is extremely common from queer and non-queer people alike. This post is about the reason I've felt so betrayed by the queer community.

--

On a personal note, I remember being so excited when I started identifying as aromantic (and later asexual). Fitting myself into labels has been a lifelong struggle for me; to this day I still can't confidently say if I'm White or PoC, neurotypical or neurodivergent, abled or disabled, cisgender or not cisgender. I continue to struggle making friends because I don't fall into social cliques. To discover that I officially, certainly, was LGBTQ+ lifted a huge weight off my shoulders. And now I'm just so sad to find that despite that, I'm still stuck in the middle. I didn't get rewarded with a community. I still feel alienated from both queer and non-queer people. I know it was silly to get my hopes up when there's such vast diversity in both groups, but it really was a disappointment. Going to my first Pride parade last year was really the moment where I realized this.

[talkbycolor]

mushroom oasis headcanons . . . ↷

A/N; im very sensitive about mychael too, oops

Pairing; "Mychael" x GN!Reader

CW; idk alien sex (jk) / this is actually cute, dont worry

Mychael as your boyfriend.

I just know that he likes to listen to ABBA with you and dance in the mornings when making breakfast or at night before going to sleep.

He purrs at bedtime, especially if you pet his hair.

You can caress his horns, they are softer than they look but also sensitive, be delicate

After a while of relationship, he could no longer avoid the growing guilt he felt and told you about the mushrooms in the forest and the brainwashing he did to you at the beginning.

Definitely identifies with Roar's "Christmas Kids" song.

Be thankful he doesn't have an internet connection or he'd make Deez Nuts cringe jokes.

He is the perfect person for fairycore, you have already begged him to do makeup together, even though he didn't need any of that.

He likes to feel safe, silly and childish with you, having learned to take care of himself since… well, always, it was a drain on the soul. what a relief to his heart to be able to be childish with you, like a break.

He still has certain self-esteem problems, his eyes always dilate when you say nice things about him (or when he's about to jump and attack ((kiss you)))

It's not like Mychael is an uncivilized being, but you've taken the time to teach him several things on dates you've had, things that perhaps he didn't know due to his isolation from society.

You're actually a little scared of what could happen if they discover Mychael's existence, so if you live together it will be in the forest.

Sometimes he is selfish and brainwashes you when he wants more kisses or just feels too needy to let you go out with your friends.

For him there is no such thing as breaking up, he will beg you for answers and ask countless times what the problem is or what you want him to change, as a last resort he would brainwash you so that you stay by his side, even if it's like a shell.

"They were 20 and decided to end their life just like this. They went up to the 21st floor and left without saying "goodbye." I wonder if when they were flying through the air they remembered… ..I once told him if you kill yourself I'm gonna kill myself too!" Basically Mychael not being able to continue with his life alone once he meets MC, if you leave, so does he.

The first time you had sex, bro, Mychael almost had to be chained up, he acted like a spoiled kid when he tried his new favorite candy.

Mychael composes songs for MC, he will even try to get new instruments, new talents, anything to entertain his firefly and have them stay in the forest with him.

Is the kind of old-fashioned sculpted lover, don't doubt that you will look like a 60-year-old couple with 3 chickens and a dog, your wish is his command. If you can't go out to eat at an elegant restaurant, he will get a recipe book to prepare the best dishes and put candles on the table. If you don't have new clothes, he will knit what you like. If you don't like the color of the cabin, he will paint everything as many times as necessary.

Physically? Mychael will never hurt you, using guilt as manipulation is not to his liking either, he loves you too much so he will only wash your brain to have a perfect life by your side, don't worry, you are safe from the world and you will have healing caresses every night , even if it is not today, if it is not tomorrow, you will learn to need it on your own and stay at will.

Mychael is terrified of people, the opinion of the masses made him think of himself as a monster and he can't help but blurt out little comments mocking his own appearance. Being with you makes him forget what he is. Why was he surprised? Because you didn't look away.

His saliva is a little salty and something tells me that he produces goo when he is excited, trust me (delulu)

♡

[heich0e]

rintarou's sheets are scratchy.

they're new, and haven't yet gone through the wash enough times to properly soften. they haven't been slept on enough times to be fully broken in. you know he bought them because you always used to tease him about his old sheets: faded with some holes in them—a mismatched fitted sheet and top sheet in two different shades of blue, unbefitting of a grown man making grown man money.

so, he got new ones.

these new sheets are green, in the exact shade you like so much—the one you always point out when the two of you are walking in the park near your office on your lunch break. he sent you a picture of the package when he got them home, fishing for praise you refused to give him for doing the bare minimum. they're nice sheets, though. expensive, organic cotton with a high thread count.

but right now, they're scratchy.

and they're irritating you as you lay tangled up in them, the top sheet wrapped around your waist like a belt and twisted around one of your bare legs. you must have been tossing and turning a lot in your sleep, because when you properly rouse from your slumber to take inventory of your surroundings, the first thing you notice is that you're practically knotted into the stiff, new cotton.

you extract yourself from the blankets, stumbling a little towards the door in a fog, and make your way from rintarou's bedroom in the direction of the kitchen.

"oh," rintarou perks up once you appear around the corner, his eyes bright when they spot you. "you're up."

you shuffle around the kitchen counter towards him, your head heavy and pounding, your mouth dry. you feel nauseated, and without thinking, you slump against him with your forehead pressing into the valley between his shoulder blades. you're confused. you're hungover. but he's warm, and smells like laundry detergent. suddenly you feel a little less queasy.

"what's going on?" you grumble into his back. you peel yourself away from him, blinking slowly, and sweep your gaze around the room to get a better sense of things.

suna holds up a frying pan and a whisk. "i'm cooking!"

you blink again. "okay?"

it's not what you meant when you asked him your first question, but rintarou simply smiles. he has an almost puppy-like personality when he gets like this—you can almost picture ears atop his head and a tail wagging happily as he stares down at you.

"how'd i get here last night?"

rintarou freezes, but only for a moment. he quickly turns his back to you again to continue on whatever misguided culinary adventure he'd been attempting before you woke up. "you were pretty drunk."

"my seniors kept egging me on," you complain, rubbing your forehead as the hazy memory surfaces from the night before. it was a company dinner you couldn't get out of, and it had quickly spiralled out of hand. "i don't even remember leaving."

rintarou laughs a little. but he still won't look at you.

"suna."

he doesn't turn, whisking something you can't identify but that you're almost certain should not be whisked in a bowl in front of him on the counter.

"suna." you repeat yourself again.

suddenly, a wave of nausea overtakes you.

no.

no.

you pat yourself down in search of your phone, but the attempt is useless. you're dressed in one of rintarou's t-shirts and boxers, neither of which come equipped with any pockets, and your phone is nowhere to be found. you whip your head around in search of it, but don't spot it anywhere in the immediate vicinity.

"hey—" rintarou finally looks at you when he senses your alarm, and his tone mirrors your own panic. "don't—!"

you swipe his cellphone off the counter in front of him, using the passcode you'd managed to weasel out of him a few months ago to unlock the device and navigate to his call log. you take off running as you tap your way through the various screens on his phone, but he's quickly in pursuit of you—leaving whatever he'd had on the stove to burn like he world's saddest funeral pyre.

"stop, stop!" rintarou is faster than you are, and has longer legs, but even by the time he catches you, you've already found what you're looking for in his call history. he snakes an arm around your waist, pulling you down onto his sofa with him in the living room, and the two of you land in a tangle of limbs against the cushions, your breathing laboured.

"i didn't make this call, did i?" you ask meekly, pointing at a brief call in the late hours of the night prior that sits at the top of his call history. it's from your number, but you're confident you hadn't been the one to dial.

rintarou pouts a little bit, avoiding your eyes. after a moment he shakes his head. you groan, rolling over on the sofa underneath him and hiding your face in your hands.

"i wasn't even there long, i promise," rintarou says, his voice impossibly close because of the way the two of you are sprawled across the sofa. his breath is warm against the column of your throat when he speaks.

you refuse to look at him.

"i didn't even say anything embarassing."

you still don't budge.

"i made sure to thank your coworkers for calling me to come get you and everything."

your hangover has been overtaken by your own mortification, a horrible heat creeping up your face to accompany the taste of bile in your throat. you've been so, so careful not to let your relationship and your career overlap thus far. so cautious about introducing rintarou into parts of your life that would make it even harder to face if or when the time came that he wasn't around anymore.

"are you embarrassed of me?"

his question makes your chest ache. the way he says it twists the knife.

you lift your face from your hands and peek at him over your shoulder. he's so close that your noses almost brush.

"no." you mean it.

the anxiety in rintarou's gaze eases. he presses closer.

"you sure?"

you narrow your eyes at him. "depends. were you wearing that awful yellow track suit?"

rintarou laughs, all breath, and then dips down to kiss you softly. you want to complain that you haven't even brushed your teeth yet, or that you kind of feel like you might be sick, or that whatever he was trying to cook is on the brink of burning down the building. but you don't. you just let him rest on top of you. you let yourself enjoy it.

when he finally pulls away, rintarou has a somewhat sly smile on his face.

"what, rin?" you ask him gently.

"just wondering if now that i've met your coworkers you're going to let me come visit you at lunch, or if you're still gonna make me hide in the park."

"i like the park," you pout.

because the park is green, the colour you like so much. like rintarou's scratchy bedsheets. and his eyes.

"okay, okay," he laughs, pressing his forehead against yours. "i like the park, too."

[themostradicallyqueer]

Something weird I've noticed is that all the "bad" or "terrible" or "deranged" communities are the ones that have been the most kind.

When you're radqueer and join a radqueer server, their aren't any rules/messages that say "DNI if you like these fandoms, have these alters, have a disorder that makes you weirder than we'd personally feel comfortable with, have all these personal things that will never effect us or that we'll ever hear about but we're still mad about it anyways, blah blah blah", instead the only DNIs they have are the people who said all those mean, exclusionist things.

Those "good" communities claim to be accepting of everyone, including weirdos and freaks, but the second they are a weirdo or freak in a way they don't like they will immediately hate you without wanting to hear reason or explanations.

But all of those "bad" communities- I NEVER felt left out or like I was doing something wrong. When we as a system first looked into the radqueer community, we were expecting it to be as terrible as the antis said it to be, yknow, "child corn" and "🍇ists" and "g0r3 l0v3r$" and shit, but it was actually just relatively normal people/things. The only difference was that they didn't gaf about what you identified as and wanted everyone to feel safe. It's why we ended up joining. Sure, we've met people who DID watch CSAM or rape people or watch gore, but either it wasn't as bad as we thought it was, or it was. But there are bad people in every community, EVER. No exceptions.

I can not remember a time we've been fakeclaimed in the "bad" community. I can not remember a time we've been afraid to be ourselves in the "bad" community. I can not remember a time someone shamed us for what we liked or who we are in the "bad" community. I can not remember a time I was afraid that sharing my opinions would get me doxxed, banned, hated, or blackmailed in the "bad" community.

I can remember numerous times we've been fakeclaimed in the "good" community. I can remember numerous times we were afraid to be ourselves in the "good" community. I can remember numerous times we've been shamed and hated for what we liked or who we were in the "good" community. I can remember numerous times we've been afraid of getting doxxed, banned, hated, or blackmailed for sharing my opinions in the "good" community.

I've only ever experienced love and support in the radqueer community. I can't say the same for ANY other community that claims to be accepting or inclusive. So, I'm not so sure about the radqueer community being the "bad" community. Maybe antis are the bad. Maybe radqueers are the good.

-DD (DareDevil)

P.S. To any radqueers reading this, you are valid. Don't be afraid to be yourself. The only ones in the wrong are antis. Here, we support you.

[littlest-bugz]

The Collective You

[one system's brief advice about accepting the idea of the collective you]

One of the best pieces of system advice started from a tumblr post and was elaborated by my DID specialist. I can't find the original tumblr post that started it, so I'm making a little post of my own <3 Share the knowledge. and also hope that someone can link the original post lol.

When I was REALLY going through it™ with my first diagnosis w/ DID, and a lack of integration, all of my alters felt like separate individuals, some of us feeling as distanced as a coworker or a stranger altogether. We were just getting a grasp on internal communication between all of our subsystems, and it was rough. We felt so entirely differentiated that we were our own people trapped in one body. While I don't really care about what language you use, all alters in CDDs are a part of one person [there's only one body and brain]- the collective you.

So obvs, I'm scrolling tumblr like the chronically online doomscroller that I am, and I see this post that goes along the line of not knowing who you are, but knowing you are 'you', regardless of who you are [referring to alters]. And it said something like "we're all me enough to pick up our meds"- something like that. iirc it was a half light hearted, half advice post, but that was really good advice for me. I kind of internalized it after I processed it in therapy. It's actually why I have started to love parts language lately tbh.

After further processing this idea in therapy, Identity Confusion stopped mattering in the grand scheme of things. I focused less on worrying about who I was, and just focused on the fact that I'm me. Just like the post I saw- We are all me. The example of all being me enough to pick up my medications just applied, like, everywhere. Even when it came down to the smallest things- with coping with other symptoms too.

Oh? I don't like coffee right now? I guess I should switch to something else. [differentiated alters]

Oh? I have barely any drawing skills right now? Okay, really sucks but I can work on something else and come back to it later. [skill variance between alters]

Oh? I have to go to a doctor's appointment? I know I'll forget that- Gotta write a list, and put it up on the board so I remember. [day to day amnesia]

You know what happened? My dissociation got better! Not immediately or entirely, obviously, and my memory [re amnesia] still sucks, but that's part of the disorder- plus other disorders that I have. This idea of the collective you is something that I think is really beneficial to all CDD systems, especially during the mid to later stages of recovery.

I, admittedly, credit most of my healing to conversations I have had with my DID specialist. Especially since, without her, I wouldn't have been able to process this idea of the collective me further, but the conversation wouldn't have been started if I hadn't seen that post on tumblr. This was a budding concept with us due to the separation we had. It helped with integration. GRANTED... Not every alter got the memo, obviously, but It's something that I'm still working on. Of course, being me comes with the prerequisite that I am a person with DID, and that I am made up of multiple parts.

Now for the piece of advice I got from my therapist- Though it requires a certain level of knowledge of your own system, such as a list of alters and some identifying info [fav drinks, fav colors, those type of things]. Look at the list of your alters wherever it may be. Just whatever you use for logging your system members. Look for the commonalities between alters. There will be at least some commonalities.

For example; A good 45% of us like bunnies, 45% like cats, and 10% have a liking for other kinds of animals. Using this information, I can pretty much deduce that 1. the collective me loves animals and 2. the collective me likes cats and bunnies especially.

Another example; I looked through our simplyplural, which has a favorite color thing [in ours at least]. By looking through the list, I figured out 1. wow I like literally all colors- my fav color is rainbows and 2. I especially like pink and light blue.

More examples; the list.. THE LIST... I looked through it and saw that a good 90% of us like MONSTER ENERGY DRINKS- of varying flavors, but the common denominator was Ultra Strawberry Dreams, but all of us like [or tolerate] water as a preferred drink. From there I can come to the conclusion that I prefer water over anything else and that I have a problem with monster [being light hearted but I genuinely do].

I hope you get the idea I'm going for. I used this process for nearly every aspect of our collective identity, though some had to genuinely be voted on, such as our LGBTQIA+ labels [offline, we just call ourself queer, but that's.. aside the point LMAO].

Obviously, there are going to be outliers- Having DID comes with the fun [/s] aspect of alters being differentiated from each other in some capacity. Example for the monster energy one- We have a handful of alters that HATE energy drinks- even just fizzy drinks in general. There's one guy who will only drink Black Coffee and water- nothing else. He's the guy who is always hiding away our monsters in the way back of the fridge, but guess what!! He's me!! The part of me that doesn't want me to ruin my health over energy drinks. The part of me that knows I deserve better than my unhealthy habits.

Getting to know the collective you is just like learning about your system! It is not inherently different than figuring out what an alters dislikes or likes are. The idea of The Collective You shouldn't feel scary or anxiety inducing- if it is, you may want to confront those feelings with a therapist if you have access to one. Every CDD system is the collective [or, well, system] of one fragmented individual- That is a studied and objective fact. I wanted to give advice from one recovering system to another.

No, this will not work for everyone, every system is different, but I'm hoping this post finds the right audience in knowing that it's worth a shot to try this!

[aeternus-art]

"You are Not Your Body, Not Your Mind, Or Your Brain-

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Not your thoughts or feelings, you are not your DNA

You am the observer, You're a witness of life" -the song uses "I", but for the sake of the point i changed it to "you".

This post gets a little out in orbit, but i hope it's a fun ride nevertheless. We'll be addressing how nothing can stop you from shifting, how "shifting methods" can be looked at from a new perspective, addressing thoughts and limiting beliefs, and how you really *really* don't need to believe you'll shift in order to do so- as well as why that's the case.

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

｡𖦹°⭒. ˚ ｡. ˚ ☁︎

ׂ 𓈒 ⋆ ۪𓍊𓋼𓆏𓋼𓍊 𓈒 ⋆

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

When you come to understand that you need not identify with all the noise and goings on of your cr, it can become exceptionally easy to turn away from any limiting thoughts, and lightly embrace your dr self.

- ☁️You are neither your Cr self or your Dr self, and you are also both, depending on what you're looking at.

Your consciousness awareness is a flashlight, your 4d are the shadow puppets, and your 3d are the shadows. You make the shadow puppets, and you use your flashlight (that always stays on you) so create any image you could imagine. If you want a different shadow, make a different puppet and use it in front of that flashlight.

- ☁️You are the creator of your reality. The 3d you see around you is a reflection of that creation. Now, the directness of the reflection isn't always so direct, it goes off the state of being you *are*, not the one you want to be. Are you chillin at the idea of being able to wake up anywhere, or is this cr body trying to tell you that you can't or won't? Want to know how to prove it wrong?

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

If anti-shifters can shift, just by feeling like "i don't *think* it's real, but if it were it'd be easy", then there is nothing stopping you. If shifters can shift without even so much as setting an intention, there is nothing stopping you.

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

I'm going to talk light science for a sec, but it's just for the sake of visual representation. During the big bang (as i recall) everything that was once together and whole, essentially exploded and pieces scatted everywhere.

Now, if this is the case, I kind of like to think about it as one ginormous jawbreaker separating into millions and billions of little jawbreakers. Now here's the thing, allllll those jawbreakers, every last one, has a little piece of the core inside them. That, in this example, is like your conciousness- that connection to all your drs and manifestations exists.

Your subconscious mind's job is partially to keep you safe in the background- but remember- you are not your brain, so you are not, at your core, this subconscious. You are not the little doubts and frustrations that pop up. You don't need to listen to any doubts, or "am i doing this right" or "what if-" or "can i-"

- ☁️You have your own little piece of source inside you, that is connected to allllllll the other little pieces everywhere, because at one point, everything was one. (purely for the sake of examples of how "you are already your dr self" ) You are already directly connected to your dr self, you're just looking at the 3d aspects instead of the 4d. You can't change a reflection, without changing what is being reflected. Shift your awareness to change the reflection. (this goes for manifestion too)

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

For those familiar with harry potter, let's try another example. If you make a new friend, and you wanted to floo to their home, you would have to set up the connection in the floo network (if you weren't already connected). Once you set up this connection, it says unless one or both people close it.

- ☁️Connecting to your dr self is very similar. You contact the floo network (your conscious awareness) and you turn your attention to the desired place you would like to "unlock", like a fireplace, there was never a closed door, it just might not have been an activated path. You can stand in that fireplace all day, saying the name over and over and over, but unless you connect to the floo network, you're not going anywhere (not through that method at least)

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

☁️This "awareness" that I speak of is simply just your attention. You are the observer, and even after doing this for so many years, even I still occasionally forget that. The beauty is, you don't stop being "the observer" just because you stop being consciously aware. This is why it's important, imo, to sometimes just turn your attention away from unwanted states. You woke up here again? Okay, doesn't matter. Stop trying to change the shadows. Remember, you get what you are being, and shifts are instant.

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Now, side note, you don't need to walk around like you're in your dr all day. If you can't do that- that's fine! Just become neutral to it- it's just one reality in infinite others you get to explore. This isn't permanent. You are not stuck. If i say that and your mind tries to disagree, just let it do its thing. You know who you are at your core, what difference does one mind out of infinite ones make?

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

☁️Methods Are Not Hard and Fast Rules. Methods are Malleable☁️

I've used methods, and i've not used methods. My first shift was literally just me (unintentionally) crashing out due to not being able to shift, and eventually, after all the tears had fallen, the pent up emotions had been felt, my dr was rightfully shoved right off the pedastool, and because I had been embodying my dr self in weeks past, I had already built the shadow puppet. Once I finally stopped trying to *get* somewhere, I woke up in my Dr. I didn't need to add anything, I actually just needed to Let Go of my limiting beliefs- and not go back to them like an ex down bad lol. I broke up with "can't shift" or "won't shift" (or maybe it broke up with me lol)

*All of this to say, you don't need a method. I was already connected and in my dr in the 4d, but this was before I learned about all of that- it wasn't intentional. If I knew that all i needed to do was connect the floos, and just chill with knowing I can walk in and out of the 3d (as consciousness) I probably would've shifted sooner. But that's just me-*

- ☁️It's like walking on a trail with this stunning view at the end, and they have one of those poles in the middle to keep vehicles off. You, as just a person (just conscious awareness) can easily walk around it. Now, if you were in a car, you have to get out first. That doesn't mean that it's the wrong path, or you're not allowed to walk it. It just means that you might have to park the car. The car is just a vehicle- it won't be gone when you come back down from the hill. Your cr self doesn't stop existing, you just stop being *directly* aware of it in your dr.

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊

Now, who are methods good for? Methods are excellent for anyone who just feels like they need a little more of a solid grasp on their dr and dr selves, people who get distracted easily, and really anyone who wants one. The important thing is just that you don't *need* one- I still use methods, not even really to help me shift, but because i think they're fun!

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

A note on states:

Rather than asking shifters "what made you shift", i implore you to try, "what does it feel like to be a shifter". For me, it's like knowing you have a fully stocked kitchen. I know that I could go and make amazing food anytime i want, but right now i'm not hungry. I satiated my thirst for my drs in my 4d imagination before ever actually interacting with them in the 3d. I shift, not only because it's fun and i enjoy it- but because that's just the result of this process- it's the law. Reality reflects out.

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

☁️*The Rational Mind*☁️

For those who are stuck on the "rational" side, I want to say that time, physical reality, and the workings of consciousness, aren't always very rational things- but there are plenty of irrational sounding things in the world- especially new things. You don't need to know how shifting works to shift. It doesn't have to feel "rational" to shift. You can fly on a plane with no idea how it works (a hundred ton tube of metal miles in the air??). I think what i'm trying to say, is that if it doesn't seem rational, you may just have to adjust your framework and your perspective.

- The perspective of a pilot might seem more rational when looking at all those buttons, as opposed to someone who's never seen a plane, ya know? Rational is subjective. I think it's rational that I currently have 5 drs that i live my life in. To me, it's perfectly rational that I can manifest anything i want. To me, it's perfectly rational that the 3d is an outwards expression of our internal states- it's just the drama being performed from the script I wrote. That's normal to me- but it wasn't always. The state was always there for me to inhabit and put on, but i actually had to inhabit it and put it on, ya know? It's simple, not necessarily easy for all

The more time you allow yourself to observe your desired outcome, off of the pedastool, seeing it as just an additional reality, 1. the closer you get to feel your dr to you because you're not paying attention to conflicting evidence, and 2. the sooner you shift

- ☁️Remember, reality comes from you, it doesn't happen to you.

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

☁️*Thoughts*☁️

It does not matter if you have one realities thoughts in another reality. It doesn't matter if you're thinking about your cr (events, sounds, emotions) in your dr, because you are still shifting you at your core. You're still going to have this realities memories (unless you scripted them out), so why wouldn't you be allowed to think about it? And even if you did script them out, reacting to blaring red alarm bells whenever it happens probably isn't helping.

- ☁️You're expanding your awareness, not necessarily moving it like "only allowed to be cr" and "only connected to dr right now".

- That's why a lot of shifters say it doesn't feel like anything- because it doesn't. My ratio of dr to cr thoughts when i shift can be as close as 99% cr and 1% dr- not that it even matters because again, you are not your mind, or your thoughts, or this body- you are the awareness of them.

- Don't get too caught up in your Crs 3d, it's more malleable than you think, but you can only mold it as much as you let yourself. There can be an overlap in thoughts/feelings while you're shifting, that's perfectly normal. I have overlaps while i'm literally in my dr- it's okay I promise. You can still shift if you're not solely thinking about your dr all the time.

☁️ "you cant shift" is meaningless to a shifter, so make it normal to feel meaningless to you. YOU know you can shift, so what does it matter? Let it go- treat it like someone just trying to pick a fight with you- it's not worth your time. walk away, and let it go. pick up your dr self in imagination instead :)

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

☁️Some last little notes: ☁️

If you're at the end of your method or attempt, and you know know what to do next, but you can't fall asleep, I would focus on one thing- surrender. Trust that you have made the puppet, you shined your light on it- and now the shadow has no choice but to appear.

Remember, "The time it takes your assumption to become fact, your desire to be fulfilled, is directly proportionate to the naturalness of your feeling of already being what you want to be - of already having what you desire."

You are fully capable of giving it to yourself now. You already have unlimited access to the bottomless well of creative power inside you. Just look beyond the physical, that's where the magic happens.

You don't need to know when you'll shift- and i'll make another post about this in depth cause I have some analogies rattling around in this brain.

Detatch from the outcome. By putting your attention or your dr self, you are eliminating the (illusionary but still "real") physical gap between you and your dr self.

For those of you with vastly different dr selves (compared to cr), I invite you to focus on more mundane tasks. How does it feel to walk in that body? How does it feel to breathe? How does it feel to sit down? To stand up?

☁️***If the goal is to normalize the feeling of having your desire (like a kid the day after christmas) so that your 3d projects that you have your desire, then all you have to do, outside of all the rigmarole, is just- have it. Walk around entertaining the idea you can literally go anywhere, anytime. It doesn't matter if you can't see it right way- your job isn't to *see* your dr self, your job is to normalize being your dr self- the version of you that's successfully shifted. ***☁️

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

I'll try not to go down this last rabbit hole too deep- but time is not linear. If you assume the state of the wish fufilled- you have it Now. All there is, is the now, and the illusion of past and future. Like, Harry Potter saying "well I knew I could do it this time... Because I had already done it." - You are pure consciousness at your core, all of the time, ever-connected to everything else.

You don't need to know how or when your desire will come. If you are normalizing your dr and getting familiar with fulfilling your wishes (not to *get* something, but just to experience) you are already doing everything right. You don't need to "wait" for some desire like a package at the door, you just need to realize it's already in your hands. It always has been, and it always will be :)

When you have a desire, treat it like a pothole- Fill in the *lack* with your wonderful human imagination :) If you carry this habit throughout all of your realities, it helps with more than just shifting.

Hope yall have a good day, and best of luck to you!! 33

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

edit: I don't know if i addressed this directly enough: Once you feel as though your dr and dr self is as normal as *you* are (in the 4d, again you at your core, not thoughts- thoughts just reflect the state too) then you're good!! no, seriously, that's it. you've fulfilled the wish- and as long as you just keep it like that, it will have no choice but to express itself in the 3d. it. will. have. no. choice. you did it, you're good. let yourself just be good.

you don't try to get something you already have- when you don't feel as though you need to "get" it or "chase" it, you have it. does that make sense? if having something in the 3d, means you have it in the 4d, then by following that logic and adding in ☁️"as above, so below, as within, so without" ☁️ as the framework, we can easily reverse the equation. 4d first- 3d follows. You won't be fulfilled because you have that thing- you have that thing because you've fulfilled the state of having it and/or you let go of the state of lack. Drop the lack from the desire, and what do you have? the desire! badda bing badda boom ( *it's a worldwide when i step in the room* )

[graychrissy]

🐼YOU ARE VOID + 2 void method🐼

Hello everyone I have decide to make a challenge since many people has been DMing me,first of I'm not a coach I just tell them what I did and I'm surprise it work for most of them,so I will tell yall what to do with some more tips that could help.

Ok,so most of you have read this many times " you are void" you guys might have also affirm "I am void", that means you ARE VOID.

Imagine as though this life is a videogame,and the character is the body and the mind and they're both trying to convince you that you can't enter void,will you listen to this imaginary character? Of course not. So whenever a thought or feeling arise when trying to enter void let it pass,just how you watch the clouds pass,just how strangers pass by you. And remember you are the void,whose playing videogame and think is one of the character.

Ok let's start.

So these are two ways,that actually will work. Both method includes Wim Hof pink breath method. (Credit to @voidprincessblog )

I. So for the first method you have to follow the exact wim hof breath method but when pink noises start playing start observing the thought and without judging them pass,think of thoughts as someone else's,think as if you're trapped in someone else's body. So all the thoughts and symptoms is experienced by this someone (your body and mind),do not identify as your body,keep going keep observing those thoughts, don't try to look for thought cuz they pop up on there own,you just gotta observe them,and slowly your mind will become silent,even observe the symptoms. And just like that my friends you'll be in the void.

★In brief.

★Use the wim hof breath method.

★ when the pink boise start observe your thoughts and symptoms.

★ once you can't hear or don't get anymore thought boom welcome to the void.

II. Second method this just include the wim hof's breathing technique without pink noises instead we're gonna use subliminals,if you have read voidprincess's post she mentioned with screenshots people have lucid dream with this breathing technique.

★ Use this 3 subliminal I recommend as someone who rarely get results from subliminal I recommend this 3.

You can use it in two way way use them before doing the breathing technique or listen overnight after the breathing technique then set intention to get lucid while dreaming.

[dandylovesturtles]

havin' all these Splinter and Leo thoughts. augh.

this is partly the fault of @/turtleblogatlast's post about Leo just wanting to make Splinter proud.

post-movie

...

Seven days post-invasion, and Leo is feeling (relatively) pretty good. Sure, he's still on a truly ridiculous amount of painkillers and he can't walk two steps without collapsing, but he's able to stay awake and talk to his family and considering where he thought he would be right about now, well... that's everything.

So yeah, he's feeling pretty good. He just finished his lunch of soup and a protein shake, warm and a little drowsy while he listens to April talk about some of the more ridiculous conspiracy theories that have started spreading on the surface. Donnie's tinkering with one of his smaller inventions while he listens, Mikey is nestled in Raph's lap, and everything is calm and cozy in their makeshift medbay.

And then his dad walks in and says, "I would like to talk to Blue, please. Alone."

And suddenly Leo doesn't feel so good anymore.

"Aha, wait," he says quickly, reaching out and grabbing April's sleeve just before she rises from her chair. "Whatever it is, you can say it in front of everyone, right?"

Splinter shakes his head. "This is a conversation I think it is best we have in private." He makes a shooing motion at the others, and April pulls her sleeve from Leo's fingers with a helpless shrug.

"See ya in a few, Leo," she says, then walks out. The others look from Splinter, to him, then back to Splinter, and one by one they each get up and shuffle out, too, with their own hasty farewells.

Traitors, every single one of them.

The door closes, and Leo finds himself alone with Splinter for the first time since coming back from Staten Island. Or at least, the first time he can remember. He was pretty out of it the first few days; most of what he remembers is muddled and confused. And embarrassing. He cried a lot more than he'd care to admit.

Splinter hops into chair April was sitting in and pulls it closer; he has to stay standing to be anywhere near eye level with Leo. He wishes he could read Splinter's face, but his expression is giving nothing away. Sometimes it's easy to forget he spent a not-insignificant part of his life as an actor, until something like this happens.

Leo decides to speak before he can. Head him off at the pass, or something.

"If you're going to yell at me, just remember my eardrums are already damaged."

Which is true - turns out being 1, too close to an exploding alien spaceship and 2, getting punched in the head repeatedly by an alien very mad about said exploding spaceship is bad for the ears, even when you don't have outer ears like a human. So super loud noises are a bad idea right now, and thus Leo cannot be yelled at. Flawless logic; maybe he can keep using that every time he gets in trouble.

For the first time, his dad's expression shifts, just a little. A deeper frown, a heavier set to his brow.

"You think I came in here to yell at you?"

Leo feels his stomach twist. Does he have to spell it out? "I mean, didn't you? That's usually what kicking everyone else out is leading up to."

"I see..." Splinter is still unreadable, looking a little too intensely at Leo. "And what do you think I want to yell at you about?"

He really does want it spelled out. Leo suddenly realizes that there won't be any yelling because this is his punishment: to admit everything he's done, to speak all his sins for his dad's ears. Lay it all out in his own tongue and show that he understands, really and truly, the depths of his screwups.

Oh, he understands. He understands it so well he may choke on the words.

"...For losing the key," he says finally, and it stings on its way out. He hasn't talked about it since it happened; every time he tries to say anything to the others, they shush him, saying, "It's okay, Leo, everything is fine now."

It's not okay, and everything isn't fine, and this is when he finally hears about it.

Finally, an identifiable emotion on Splinter's face: horror, dawning clear and present. And Leo doesn't understand that, because doesn't Splinter know he lost the key? He was there for that conversation, wasn't he? Leo's memories of that day have grown a little hazy between the drugs and the recovery and the fact that thinking about it for too long makes him go fuzzy around the edges, but he's pretty sure he remembers Splinter being there. He flicked popcorn at Leo's head. He probably should have done more than that; maybe then Leo wouldn't have made such a mess of things.

Splinter doesn't say anything right away, just stares at Leo with that horrified expression, and the silence is so scary that Leo starts filling it without even thinking.

"I was kidding about the whole... not yelling at me thing. I know I deserve it. I mean, I was fooling around, doing what you and Raph told me not to do, and I doomed the whole world doing it! Some leader I am, right? And I know I'm not exactly your favorite son to begin with, and that's fair, because I keep letting you down, but this is definitely my worst screwup to date, and you yell at me when I don't close the fridge door all the way or throw balls around the TV room so why wouldn't you yell at me for destroying the planet, right...?"

His voice peters out at the end, too hoarse to continue. That's the most words he's strung together over the last week, and for the first time he's glad for his injuries, for stopping him from spewing any more embarrassing word vomit just to fill the air.

Splinter is still looking at him with that same horrified expression. If anything, he just looks more upset, which means that Leo at least accomplished his goal.

Leo's waiting for the yelling to start, but when Splinter finally says something, it's, "You think I have a favorite son?" throwing Leo for a loop once again.

"Uh, yeah?" he says, because that's all there is to say. He's always assumed it's Donnie - the "funny one", the one who fixes Splinter's TV when it's broken, and the only one of them likely to get a real job and move out of the house. But even if it's not Donnie, it's gotta be Mikey, or Raph. His brothers are amazing and talented, and all Leo has ever been good at is winning the Lair Games.

Splinter closes his eyes a moment, and when he opens them his face moves back to a more neutral expression. "I do not have a favorite son," he says, firm and serious. "I love all of you just the same."

Leo thinks that can't be true - if it is, he feels bad for the other guys. But he doesn't think he can just say that, so he says, "Yeah, Dad, of course," instead.

Splinter looks a bit crestfallen. "You don't believe me?" he asks, and shoot. Leo has no idea how to respond to that.

"...I know you love us," is what he says. And that's true, it is! He just doesn't know how his dad could like him as much as the others.

Splinter's expression turns sad. He reaches out and lays a furry hand on Leo's arm, careful of his bandages and all the many wires he's hooked to. "You think you doomed the world?"

"I lost the key," Leo repeats. "It was all my fault. It's why I had to..." His voice fumbles over the words, and he revises. "It's why it had to be me."

Splinter's mouth twists. He climbs out of the chair and onto the mattress, careful not to jostle Leo as he settles down on his knees.

"Blue," he says softly, gently palming Leo's face this time. "None of this was your fault."

Leo's stomach twists again. He thought he was being punished, but somehow this is worse.

"Yes it was," he argues. "I lost the key," for the third time, "and... and I ignored the order to retreat, and got Raph captured, and and and, I ignored the guys and tried to force our way into Metro Tower, and it was me who told Donnie to try to fly that stupid ship, and because of me Mikey had to-"

"Leonardo," says Splinter, sharp, and Leo goes silent. His dad looks devastated, but he keeps his hand on Leo's cheek, brushing with his thumb, and for the first time Leo realizes his skin is wet. Splinter sighs heavily, his entire frame seeming to droop with the weight of it.

"Leonardo," he repeats, softly this time. "You did not doom the world."

"But-"

A furry finger on his lip quiets him.

"You did not doom the world," Splinter repeats, once again firm and serious. "You did not take the theft of the key seriously, because you did not know what it was, the threat it represented. But it was the Foot Clan who chose to use that key, fully knowing what evil it would unleash. That is not on you, my son. The responsibility falls squarely on them."

Leo doesn't know how much he can believe that - isn't it their job to stop the Foot Clan? But Splinter looks so sure as he says it, and his hand is still tender on Leo's cheek, and for the first time a little bit of doubt seeps into Leo's heart, telling him that maybe, just maybe, this wasn't all his fault after all.

But still...

"Even if that's true," he says, with heavy emphasis on the if, "everything I did after that-"

"You are young," his dad interrupts. "You are inexperienced. You are learning. And the amount of growth you showed us all, even over just that one day... You shined as brightly as I know you can."

Again, Leo's stomach does a twist - but it's a happier one, this time. Splinter's voice is sincere, leaving no room for doubt, and Leo can almost, almost believe that this is true, that his dad has believed in him from the very beginning. Has seen something in him, whatever it was that led him to make Leo the leader, that lead to him putting trust in Leo.

He just wishes he felt like he'd done more to earn it.

"You did not doom the world," says his dad again. "You saved it. But, it never should have been like that to begin with. You should never have been facing down such a fierce foe so young, especially as alone as you boys were. And you-"

His voice becomes choked up, and Leo's heart lurches.

"You... sacrificed yourself to save us all. I... I am your father, and I... could not protect you."

He's crying. His dad is crying, and Leo feels panic, reaching out to try and stop this.

"Dad-"

"No." Splinter holds up a hand, giving his head a hard shake. "All I ever wanted for you boys was to save you from the sacrifices asked of our family. And yet I could not - and for that, you paid dearly. You almost paid the ultimate price, and we almost lost you forever."

A thick knot forms in Leo's throat, and he can barely get out, "I'm okay, Dad, I'm here."

"Yes you are." Splinter squeezes his shoulder desperately. "You are here. You are safe. But that doesn't change that it should not have been you to begin with."

Leo watches in dawning horror as Splinter steps back, then kneels over on the mattress.

"This is why I came in here, Blue. Not to yell at you. To apologize."

He presses his forehead against the sheets.

"I am so sorry that I could not protect you."

He's crying. So is Leo, openly now. He reaches out for his dad, fumbling for his shoulders and urging him to straighten up.

"No, Dad... This wasn't your fault!"

"But-"

"No! It was just... it was just a really, really shitty thing that happened, okay? It was the Foot Clan, and the Krang, but it wasn't- it wasn't..."

Splinter raises his face and looks at him, and suddenly the words he's been trying to get Leo to believe for the last several minutes barrel into him and Leo crumbles.

"...I didn't have to do it," he says.

"No." Splinter gets up, coming closer. "You had nothing to atone for. You did it because you are brave, and you are kind, but this was never yours to fix."

Leo sucks in one harsh breath, then another, and then he's sobbing harder than he ever has in his life, and his dad hugs him tight, his arms warm and his fur soft where Leo buries his face in his shoulder.

All the feelings he's pushed aside - the ones he didn't think he had the right to feel, because he'd had to do it, he had to make up for his mistakes - bubble over, gripping him with grief and despair but also relief, that he's still here to cry and be hugged by his dad.

"I was so scared."

"I know."

"I thought I wouldn't see you guys again."

"I know. We thought we had lost you, too."

"I just... I didn't know what else to do... I couldn't let him... I couldn't..."

"Shhh, it's alright. It's over now. We're all safe."

Leo hugs his dad back, as tightly as he can with his injuries, and sobs and sobs until he's all out of tears. And all along, his dad tells him he is safe, he is good, and he is loved.

Later, Leo feels even better than he had before.

[doberbutts]

hello! I'm the one that sent you that ask a week or so ago. Sorry I didn't check to see if you'd answered for a while because I was just so upset and had to take a second. I will say I scrolled through a bunch of helpful posts you reblogged before I even found the ask again that helped a LOT.

Two things I thought you might want to know is that it wasn't speculation that you'd blocked the weirdo blog that sent me your way: they literally have "proudly blocked by doberbutts" in their bio which was why i felt safe coming to you lmao. Second is I guess my struggle with this issue was an overall struggle with how bad wider misogyny has gotten in general and how muddied it's gotten with the "male loneliness crisis" and like, centering men's issues under patriarchy and just how insanely upset it's been making me. Seeing cis MRAs identify with trans men freaked me out because like, yeah it's important to talk about how (cis) men suffer under patriarchy but it's just so rare for me to find men do that without devolving into misogyny, and I start to feel so helpless because I know validating these issues matter but women are being literally dehumanized openly. I do play oppression olympics with this specific issue and just of COURSE women suffer more under patriarchy, but the same men who demand space to air how they suffer won't acknowledge that truth. (sorry for soapboxing; some of them do! It's just...things are so bad for women rn lol it's really hard to have compassion when it feels like none is being given to me).

So the more I see this issue the more I think people are being affected by larger misogyny like I am, but are doing the typical thing that happens where you lash out at a group you can "reach." Policing and harassing trans men's behaviours is way easier than cis men. I've also been seeing some parallels between this discourse and the "gay men vs lesbian women" discourse. It's not really a one-to-one but the discussion of the role of misogyny re homophobia towards gay men who still have male privilege but, come on, if they have feminine affectation it's Different and the back and forth that used to happen when gay men and lesbian women did oppression olympics, it just feels similar.

idk as i type this I hope I don't come across disingenuous or like, my Too Casual Overly Respectful tone is trying to subtly incept you. I worry my vibes are too "women first" but I just can't help it misogyny really is ruining my life 😭. Anyways I'm very grateful for your perspective and your blog. I feel more settled and equipped to push back against anti transmasculine behaviour with rhetoric that can actually challenge people

To respond to each point in turn:

1: Again I still don't really know who that is, though I am somewhat bemused by the idea that someone I clearly don't really remember is still so obsessed with me that they're proud I've blocked them. For the record, my block list is as follows: people who send anonymous hate, people who continue to harass me after I've told them to stop, people I catch with posts containing inexcusable bigotry, obvious trolls, self-identified zoophiles and MAPs, and people who repeatedly send me fundraisers after I have already said I only share fundraisers from people I know and trust. Being on my block list is, um, not really good company, so it's kind of funny to me that someone is proud to be there. Yeah I'm sure they'll fit right in with the neo-nazis and dogfuckers and cyber bullies. Oh and I guess my ex but I only blocked them after they started harassing me about our failed relationship years later. Enjoy block hell I suppose.

2: I'm not really here to play who has it worse, not because I don't recognize the wider understanding of privilege vs oppression but because I think it is a self-defeating thread of thought because you will always find a "more oppressed" example, and I think that people should be allowed to talk about their hurts regardless of their status of "more oppressed" vs "less oppressed". Talking about the ways society has hurt them is not what makes MRAs dangerous. What makes them dangerous is who they blame, how they go about fixing their problem, and the solutions to their problems they come up with.

To be quite frank, the majority of MRAs are men who have experienced some form of social rejection or isolation. Most have been sold some patriarchal lie about how by being men they inherently deserve good sex with hot women on demand, a wife at home to keep barefoot and pregnant, a high paying job where they are respected and valued regardless of the effort they themselves put into it, and all the luxuries that lifestyle can afford. This is a fantasy, you and I both know it. And when these men realize the hard reality that we live in an age of extreme social isolation, that in order to have a partner you need to actually have more personality than a used dishrag and with only half the mess at max, that good sex is about give and take and not just yourself, that these high paying jobs are few and far between with most takers being born into some level of wealth rather than any merit they themselves have earned... they lash out.

It does not at all help things to understand that many of these MRAs are themselves marginalized in some way, but their framework not only doesn't let them see it but also advocates a harsh rejection of anyone who is self-aware enough to realize it. A lot of these guys are undiagnosed, have trauma, and are just as affected by the systems of racism, classism, homo- and trans-phobia, xenophobia, sexism, and ableism as the rest of us.

Quite frankly, I'd rather these dudes see a group of (trans) men fighting for our place in society by joining hands with other activists with more feminist, black-friendly, disabled-friendly, gay- and trans-friendly in an attempt to lift everyone out of the pit rather than continuing to fight over scraps... than to see them continue to blame women and Jews and then go shoot up a school or a mall about it. One of these helps. The other just kills people and excuses rape. There's a lot of value in deradicalizing people by offering them a path to resolving their pain that is perhaps less destructive and more constructive.

This is also why the constant comparison to MRAs annoys me. MRAs kill people in senseless acts of terror and despair because they're upset that they're not having the sex fantasy the patriarchy sold them. Trans men talking about our oppression- regardless of the word we use to express it- are mostly talking amongst ourselves about suicide and rape statistics and sharing ways to get hormones and surgery despite unwilling doctors and insurance companies. We're talking about how our social groups rejected us the moment we came out, or how people use us being men against us in ways that was not happening before we came out or passed. These are not at all equivalent conversations.

3: Again I ask you- I see people using both cis and trans feminist frameworks to hurt other people. Where is your concern for that? I am equally concerned about TERFs as I am about MRAs, as they have driven multiple transgender people and our allies to suicide and even have committed acts of violence against people irl as a result of their ideology. Most TERFs will also be the first ones to tell you that they have been hurt, deeply, by men and that they also are frequently undiagnosed or untreated, traumatized, and affected by the same systems of oppression. Does their existence and their determination to latch onto every feminist conversation including those of people who are staunchly against them then poison all feminism to you? If not, then why make that distinction for trans men and MRAs?

I am black. I am Indigenous. I am transgender. I am gay. I am disabled. I am poor. I suffer. People hurt me. I see every day how bad things are. Do you think I cannot see it, or that my ignorance is the reason for my request for compassion? Perhaps consider that it is rather my knowledge and my lived experience that fuel my call for compassion, instead. I never said it would be easy. But I do think it would make a better world.

4: I do actually agree that it is very similar to the gay man vs lesbian conversation and have said for a while that it's the same queer infighting discussion we've already hashed out for the last 50 or so years, but the target groups just swapped out. It's just butchphobia, it's just biphobia, it's just aphobia, it's just panphobia, it's just nbphobia- it's the same fucking shit over and over and over again. It was shit infighting before and it's shit infighting now. Privilege is a conversation that depends so heavily on context, and the way it has been bastardized by the internet's poor understanding of political frameworks developed by women of color and their allies into cute soundbites and phrases rather than a deep, nuanced knowledge will never fail to annoy me.

Do gay men have privilege over lesbians? As a class, sure, they would have male privilege. But what do we mean by male privilege? The privilege to not worry about being assaulted on the street? To walk home late at night unbothered? To marry who they want, to have the romantic partner they desire, to feel safe within a domestic partnership? You and I both know that doesn't quite match up to the lived experience of gay men worldwide or even here in the "gay paradise" US. How does this interact with other marginalizations? Does a black gay man have privilege over a white lesbian? What happens if he's a drag queen dressed up for an event and she's a butch that passes for cis male? Does that change retroactively if this "gay man" figures out she's actually a transbian 5 years later, and the lesbian is a TERF? I'm not saying this breaks the framework of male privilege- I am saying that sometimes the theory doesn't match the reality, and a nuanced and intersectional understanding is required when talking on an individual scope rather than class politics.

Additionally- as a side note- it is also incredibly annoying to watch people act like privilege = oppressor = dangerous, and oppressed = victim = safe. Privilege, and whether or not you have any, is not a moral indicator nor is it an indicator of the safety of the person you're interacting with. I have privilege over people who cannot walk, because I can. I am not objectively or systemically oppressing people who cannot walk by the use of my legs in my day-to-day life. Oppression is action- if I vote for policies and politicians that removes ramps and safety regulations and provisions to assist wheelchair users? Now I am oppressing people who cannot walk. If I block or move or interfere with the disability aids, if I mock people or assault or harm them, if I dump them out of their mobility aids or break them, that is oppression. The act of climbing the 3 stairs on my front porch to get into my house is a privilege, but the oppression stems from the people who built my house to even have stairs on both exits.

5: lastly to end a very long post, I don't actually think there's any harm in centering yourself when discussing things that objectively affect you, as long as you remember to include others who are affected and let them have their floor to also center themselves when they need to speak up. I am a black trans man. My politics are pretty centered on black feminism. I don't think that is objectively a bad thing. I prefer to let the demographics with similar problems speak for themselves- I would rather my trans fem friends get the mic when they open their mouths, my lesbian friends, my Jewish friends, my latino and asian and arab friends. I don't think there's anything wrong with them centering their own problems and outlooks, as long as they recognize that there's shared space to be had with others who feel similar hurts. I think it's pretty normal to center yourself. I think the difficult thing is knowing when to relinquish the megaphone to someone who's been dying to use it, while you yourself still have so much to say.

[gor3sigil]

Little things about being transmasc and/or a trans man:

As trans men and/or transmasc, we always are told to "do better" than cis men, and at the same time to conform to the patriarchal model of masculinity (white, able bodied, strong, thin, necer show emotions etc) to be seen as men/masc.

But you have to understand that some trans men don't want to perform that type of masculinity or CAN'T altogether.

Furthermore, our sexual orientations are often weaponized against us. If we love men, we're called slurs or in more feminist spaces. we're told that we're just women with extra steps, and if we love women, we're asked why we can't just be lesbians or told that we are doing patriarchy all over again. And if you dare to identify gay, you're told that no gay men like p*ssies, and if you dare to identify as a lesbian, you can't because no lesbians like men. And that is without considering the very broad sexuality/romantic spectrum, where your transness is basically a weapon too (aromantic ? Yeah, figure, you're trans and confused. Bi ? Yeah, figure, you're trans and can't decide. Asexual ? Yeah, figure, you're trans or WORSE you're afab and traumatized and so on and so forth).

Gender nonconforming trans men/transmascs are relentlessly called trenders within the community or asked why they even bother to transition. In the outside world, we are often read as a threat and assaulted because of it. But if you are gender conforming, you'll have smirky cis women tell you how you just fantasised about being a Big Strong Man and are just matrixed by patriarchy or too traumatized to live as a woman.

Want to transition medically ? Oh, but T is a BAD hormone that does BAD thing like make you gain WEIGHT and gives you ACNE and makes you GROSS. On the weight topic I could write a book about the horrible fatphobia within the community because I kid you not, I have been a girl teen with EDs who hung out in pr* an* forums and I've seen some shit in transmascs groups and passing tips that have a real resemblance to what I saw back then. Same for transmascs/trans men fitness groups.

Don't want to transition medically ? Lol theyfab. Like so much a woman. Very lady like with a bonus of bringing the movement down.

When it comes to inside the community, we can't talk about specific issues without being shushed, intersex transmascs, and trans men face a LOT of hardships and are insulted. I remember a friend of mine who is an intersex trans man receiving death threats and got told to [redacted] himself when he talked about his experiences as an intersex trans man BY TRANS PEOPLE.

Bipoc trans men and transmascs are always confronted to the white standards of passing coupled with the rampant racism within and outside of the community.

And one thing I can not not bring up: I think a lot of people forget that we can't mourn our dead. Why ? Because these past years, transmascs and trans men have been forgotten from TDOR lists. I remember seeing Twitter threads from trans men adding them because we don't even KNOW when someone has died or they are deemed as women and the death is treated like a feminicide. And it has been a constant.

We can basically never please no matter what we do.

That's my 2 cents on the transandrophobia because I feel like it needs to be said. If you still think that trans men and transmasc individuals don't face specific issues, think again.

[bloomzone]

GLOW UP DIARY #4 : THE IMPORTANCE OF BOUNDARIES

"when u laugh,u think more positively"

-Park sunghoon (enhypen)

© bloomzone

#4 BOUNDARIES

💬:Boundaries are limits we set for ourselves. Everyone's boundaries are different, and they are based on what is personally important to us. They can be set in several aspects of life, such as work, relationships, family, and in conflict it can be physical or emotional limits and help to determine a person's comfort level, needs, and preferences. Essentially, boundaries dictate how we want/ allow ourselves to be treated, and how we treat others. Healthy boundaries allow for accountability, respect, and open communication.

Drawing the Line: Understanding and Setting Healthy Boundaries

﹙ 💌 ﹚ If you grew up in a home where no boundaries were set or where people violated your boundaries, setting and maintaining boundaries may be difficult. It is okay if it is hard. Setting clear boundaries is not selfish, it sets the tone for healthy relationships and is an important part of one's own well being. If you ever notice you feel resentful or drained by a person/place/situation, it may be time to look at the boundaries. Remember, boundaries are not threats or ultimatums. Sometimes it is hard for other's to respect our boundaries, but this is not a reflection of you.

Healthy boundaries look like...

• valuing your own opinion

• respecting limits set by you/ others

• not compromising own values for someone else

• sharing information appropriately

• effectively communicating needs/wants

• accepting "no" from others

• being able to say "no"

• being able to identify when a boundary has been broken

TYPE OF BOUNDARIES

Physical Boundaries: These relate to personal space, physical touch, and privacy. Examples include not wanting to be hugged or feeling uncomfortable being touched without permission. "I need personal space and don't appreciate being touched without consent."

Emotional Boundaries: These separate your emotions and responsibilities from others. Examples include not allowing yourself to be blamed for someone else's issues or not taking on other people's problems. "I'm not comfortable discussing my personal feelings right now."

Mental Boundaries: These protect your beliefs, opinions, and identity from being violated. Examples include not arguing about your values or not allowing others to belittle your thoughts and ideas. "I respect your opinion, but I disagree and prefer not to discuss this further."

(there is a lot of types but I focused on these 3)

How to set boundaries

Setting boundaries may take time and practice. Don't get down on yourself if it feels hard.

1. Identify what behaviors from others is acceptable for you, and what might cause discomfort

2. Clearly communicate your boundaries with others. Learn to say no and be assertive.

3. Decide what to do if someone breaks your boundaries. This may mean a tough discussion, taking time away, or ending a relationship.

4. Get clear on your values, needs, and limits. Reflect on what's most important to you and where you need to draw lines.

5. Start small if it's hard at first. Practice with something minor before bigger issues.

6. Use "I" statements to explain your boundary without blaming, like "I'm not comfortable with..."

7. Be direct, firm, and respectful when stating your boundary. Don't over-explain or get defensive.

8. You can't control others' reactions, but you can control how you respond. Calmly reinforce the boundary if needed.

9. Be consistent in upholding your boundaries. If you allow them to be crossed, they won't be taken seriously.

ıllı ⠀ : ⠀ Remember setting and maintaining boundaries is not about controlling others but about creating a space where respectful and healthy interactions can thrive. ❛ ⠀ ♡ ⠀ !!

© bloomzone

[loveless-arobee]

If you, when you ask for advise on how to write AroAllo characters, use wording that implies you believe non-romantic sexual relationships are "strange" or would make a character appear "selfish" or "less human" or anything like that, or if you say that non-romantic sexual relationships will be read as the participants "using each others bodies" without caring for one another, even if you specify that you don't actually believe that and this is what readers would think, you do have some aro-phobic and amatonormative sentiments you need to get rid off first.

Because sure, some, perhaps even a lot, of your potential readers will make those assumptions. But there's quite literally nothing you can do about other people's aro-phobia and internalized amatonormativity (especially not to the level necessary, and in a fiction book).

But as the author, you do have to ask yourself if your representation should be for the actually aromantic people who'll read your book for the representation of them, or for alloromantic people who'll need every little detail spoon-fed and then still throw a tantrum because they can't relate to an aromantic character [no, not every alloro is like this. I get that you're one off the good ones. Now continue.]

The best way to make a non-romantic sexual relationship read as natural and normal is to just write it that way. Don't dwell on it longer than you would on other types of relationships! Don't make it seem like it's something weird or abnormal that needs to be discussed over fifty pages before the plot can continue. You don't have to do anything overly complicated and make your aromantic character jump through hoops to be understood; you can just have a character refer to their sexual partner as such, or call their relationship a sexual relationship (or "fuckbuddies" and similar terms if your characters are more crude), have them call themselves aromantic, and if it fits your plot you could have a conversation between the partners in a sexual relationship to define their relationship and feelings for one another just as you would for characters in any other type of relationship, and that's it. That's all you have to do. Congrats. You wrote an allosexual aromantic character in a sexual relationship.

Of course, there can be and often is a lot more to AlloAro representation, but a lot of you all are absolutely over-complicating the issue and making it much harder on yourself to create something. Especially if it's a side-character, it's absolutely alright to keep it simple! I promise you, as long as you treat your aromantic character normally and don't other them, and listen to aromantic people when they talk about their experiences and how they want to be represented, there really isn't much you can do so horribly wrong that we'll hunt you for sport or whatever horror-imaginations you have when you think about writing the "wrong" type of aromantic character.

Yes, a bunch of alloromantic readers won't like whatever you write about aromanticism. They'll say it feels "forced" and "unnatural", but that is on them. Because a lot of people simply believe aromantic people to be "unnatural", and there is nothing you can do to change their mind. No representation will be "good enough" to make everyone stop being aro-phobic.

Don't write your aromantic representation with aro-phobes in mind. Write it for your aromantic readers. They will thank you.

Also, always remember that all aros are different, and you can't possibly represent everyone in just one or a few characters, and you shouldn't be (and aren't) expected to. Know where your characters fall on the spectrum and how their aromanticism affects them, and write that, don't try to make them something all aromantics can "identify" with. That will only cause no aromantic person to be able to relate to them.

Other than that, really just write! Of course ask questions if you have them, but please stop using aro-phobic phrases such as above to ask them.

[formerlycookierunauprompts]

Yo, is me, I was one of the anons with this prompt

“Idea, reader cookie wakes up from a nightmare and runs into pure vanilla and tells him what happened to them, he reassures them that they’ll be fine, and offering them to stay in his room for the night…little do they know, for that is not pure vanilla…”

Uh-if ya wanna do it that’s cool

I'm pretty sure the last time you sent this the ask bx was closed but Sure! I'm happy to do it now.

Set in the Warden!Reader Timeline btw, plus Warden Reader Lore. Under the cut because it's pretty long.

Requested Prompts #46 - 💔💓

You are the Warden of the Great Seal, created by the Witches to keep the sealed Beasts in check. Nothing more, nothing less. You patrol the realm of the seal tirelessly, perhaps day in day out. But you never knew what time it was there, nor how much time had passed. You just know that it's long judging by Eternal Sugar's complaints. After all, you are the Warden of the Seal. Nothing more, nothing less. It was the purpose the Witches made you for, right? You are the Warden of the Seal. Nothing more, nothing less. " But there HAS to be something more, right?" A voice nags at you, interrupting your patrol. You cannot identify its source, its likely just one of the Beasts messing with you again. You're almost like a chew toy to them. You can't even begin to recount the amount of times you've been torn apart, you tend to keep your distance from Burning Spice and Eternal Sugar. But it's fine, they are contained. You're doing a good job. They can't escape, they won't escape. You can't escape, you won't ever escape. You are the Warden of the Seal, nothing more, nothing less. You aren't meant to be anyone else. But what if you are? You are the Warden of the Seal. Nothing more, nothing less. Who were you before you were the warden? You are the Warden of the Seal. Nothing more, nothing less. Can you hear that breaking sound? You are the Warden of the Seal. Nothing more, nothing less. Can you smell that scent? You are the Warden of the Seal, keeping the Seal closed is your job. Can you taste that fresh air? You are the Warden of the Seal. Can you see the empty prisons? You may just suck at your job. Can you feel that you're alive?

----

You awake with a sharp gasp, grabbing your spear from next to where you were laying down. A bed, your mind supplies you with. More specifically, it's a bed in the... uh, where are you again? Come to think of it, there isn't supposed to be any beds inside the seal. So then where are you? And what happened? " Miss Warden?" You hear a voice, you quickly point your weapon at the source and- Oh, it's just Pure Vanilla Cookie. You slowly lowered your spear. " My apologies, but it seemed like you were having a nightmare. Are you alright?" " I- I'm fine. It was just a dream after all." You deflect, and you swear that for just a moment you can see Pure Vanilla Cookie's eye twitch. You remembered where you are now, this was the Faerie Kingdom. It was the home of the Silver Tree, otherwise known as the seal, and you'd left the seal to chase after Shadow Milk Cookie since he'd escaped(momentarily, you remind yourself). The main problem, was that White Lily Cookie had re-sealed Shadow Milk into the seal without you. So naturally, you were on edge. " Are you sure?" Pure Vanilla questioned you. " You did look quite disturbed, Little Warden. If there's anything troubling you, then don't be afraid to tell us." He then offered with a kind smile, it was nice of him to do so in fact. Except, there was just one thing that had made you skeptical. Sure, it was something nice but... " ... 'Little Warden'? You muttered aloud, just enough for Pure Vanilla to hear you. Wasn't Pure Vanilla at least a head shorter than you? So then why would he... Actually, wait. Pure Vanilla hadn't gone through a growth-spurt, right? Because he was simply too tall- Wait. Your formerly appreciative expression falters into a neutral grimace, you could smell the ash from the flames of chaos outside. You could see the cracks in his disguise, in fact, you could even see the maze you'd been trapped in with your new allies sitting on the drawers as if it were an innocent snow-globe, the maze also seemed to be contained in said snow-globe. You point your spear at him again, now knowing who he truly is. " Shadow Milk Cookie." You said sternly. " Drop that disguise you're wearing, I know it's you." The beast wearing Pure Vanilla's dough smirked, a grin far too wide present on his face. " Well well well well well! I didn't think you'd figure me out so soon~!" Shadow Milk's voice came through, he'd completely dropped any pretense that he could have been Pure Vanilla in the slightest way. The beast then dropped to the floor with a splat, melding back into the shadows. It isn't too long before you can feel him curl around you, back in his true shape, resting his head and hands upon your shoulders. You staggered in his grasp with a gasp, your spear dropping out of your hands as you lost your footing. " How'd you guess it was me? My silly lilttle Warden?~ Come on, I'm just crumbling to know!" He chirped, holding your weapon just out of reach. " You..." You almost growled, not willing to entertain the twisted entertainer before you. " What have you done to my allies? Why am I here? Did you give me that dream?" You calmly(or maybe coldly?) questioned him, you know that you shouldn't give in to his tomfoolery. " Oh no no no no no my dear, dreamland isn't my domain, that would be Eternal Sugar's." Shadow Milk chirped, so then... Had all the beast's gotten out? You couldn't help but feel a pang of dread settle in. " As for why you're here, well, you refused to stay put in my silly little maze of deceit! You ended up getting out so... I decided to bring you here!" " And 'here' would be...?" You asked, tilting your head back to look at him.

" The Spire of Deceit and Truth!" He hummed. " Oh, and if you're planning on escaping then don't even try to! Each floor of the spire is it's own maze of deceit, it's almost impossible to get out!" He says, as if you can't just jump off the balcony. He detaches from you, letting you fall back onto your surprisingly comfortable bed. It's only now that you realize just how large everything's gotten, your reminder that you were just a crumb compared to the beasts. The shadows collect and grow in mass, eventually all forming together to make Shadow Milk's towering form. " Well, I have to go now! All of Earthbread is waiting for my next performance! So just stay put here, you cute little thing~!" He chirped, all before disappearing in a flash of blue light. And now that you're given a moment longer to think, you come to a realization. You failed at your job, if all the other beasts got out then... the seal would have to be broken, heck, maybe even destroyed. And now, you're probably the only one who even has a chance of wrangling them all back up. Hopefully the seal can be repaired... If it's not entirely destroyed.

----

And there we go! finally got this out. I got too busy playing side order for splatoon three but now I am back on the grind! Mostly. (It's five AM as of posting this, don't worry I did in fact sleep.)

But anyways yeah! reader angst! yippee! This takes place in a more sort of 'things are going bad but we may or may not get a bad ending?' timeline for the Warden!Reader AU. Aka where all the beasts get out and Warden!Reader gets trapped in the maze for a while before figuring out she's in Shadow Milk's stupid fucking maze.

But however will the little warden defeat the five great beasts? Well, that's for you to figure out. I'm just the prompt guy(girl).

[deception-united]

Hello! Hope this ask finds you well 😄

Do you have a guide on how to incorporate dialogue into a story? I'm quite confused in this aspect, like, do I end every dialogue in a comma? (excluding questions and exclamations)

Also just writing things like, "he said, she cried, they snickered, John retorted, Jane whined" becomes tiring after a little while.

I've seen some authors just write dialogue without specifying who said it and the reader relies on context clues to decipher it.

All the rules on writing dialogue is perplexing and any guidance you have on this is much appreciated 🙏

Thank you!

Hi, thanks for asking and so sorry for the late reply! Seamlessly incorporating dialogue into your story is an essential aspect of storytelling that can really bring your characters to life.

Let's start with punctuation. Generally, you would use a comma to separate the dialogue tag from the spoken words; however, this isn't a strict rule. You can also use periods or other punctuation marks depending on the structure of your sentence. For example:

"Hello," he said. "Hello." He smiled. "But," he insisted, "I never actually saw her." "But—" He paused. "Never mind."

Regarding your concern about repetitive dialogue tags, you're absolutely right. Using "he said," "she cried," etc., repeatedly can become tiresome. It's good to mix it up and use a variety of dialogue tags, or even omit them altogether when it's clear who is speaking.

Using context clues to identify the speaker is a great technique. It adds a layer of engagement for the reader and can make the dialogue feel more natural. Here's an example:

"I can't believe you did that." The anger in her voice was palpable.

In this case, we don't need a dialogue tag because the context clues ("the anger in her voice") indicate who is speaking.

Here are a few more tips to help you navigate writing dialogue:

Use action beats. Instead of using dialogue tags, you can describe the actions of the characters to indicate who is speaking. For example:

John slammed his fist on the table. "I won't stand for this!" Sarah wiped away a tear. "Please don't leave me."

Vary your dialogue tags. Instead of always using "said," try using different verbs that convey how the character is speaking, such as whispered, shouted, muttered, etc.

Omit dialogue tags when possible. If it's clear who is speaking based on the context—for instance, when two characters are talking back and forth—you can omit dialogue tags altogether.

Read dialogue aloud. This can help you identify any awkward phrasing or unnatural-sounding dialogue.

Remember: writing dialogue, like any skill, will undoubtedly improve with practice and research. Don't be afraid to experiment and find what works best for your story. Happy writing!

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