#i am going fucking bonkers i actually cant

[odetoastar]

im going insane about this actually

okay im sorry but just imagine being kageyama tobio. your parents are always working late, your sister quit volleyball years ago and now she's off being an adult and having a career, none of your teammates get why you care so much and the only guy who did, because he cared the same amount in the same way, graduated 2 years ago and also hated your guts. your peers have given you a cruel nickname just so they can reinforce how little they like or understand you, you dont have any friends, you have nothing but volleyball actually, your grandfather is dead and you are clinging to the promise he made you when you were a little kid because if you dont you might just go insane. you are so, so incredibly lonely.

and then, THEN, this scrawny 5 foot nothing kid stares you down outside the gymnasium bathrooms and promises to beat you, and he totally sucks at volleyball. like, he. is. terrible. but he can run, and he has good reflexes, he jumps so high he looks like he's flying, and most importantly he runs headfirst into a wall and then says 'we haven't lost yet' like its the most obvious thing in the world when his teammates ask him why he bothered. and you realise this kid is just like you, the same kind of fucked in the head you are. and youre furious, what the hell has this guy been doing for the past 3 years? your grandfather promised you that someone even better would come and find you are here he is, but you beat his team in less than an hour and you're pretty sure you'll never see him again, despite him promising to take you down, because never once in your life has anyone who was supposed to stick around actually do that. you're angry because you didn't have to be so painfully lonely all these years, you could've had someone who kept up with you, but he just wasn't there, because he sucks and you don't but he doesn't have to and that makes it so much worse than you just being a freak who was completely one of a kind.

and then you go back to your team, back to your last middle school tournament, and you play more games. only this time youre pissed. you know that there's someone else like you now, someone who will. not. stop until the ball has hit the floor and you don't get why your teammates won't just be better, try harder, move faster. and then they abandon you too. you thought you were alone before, but now you have absolutely nothing, not even volleyball. and you didn't get into the school your grandfather went to, and the coach you picked your back-up school for is in the hospital, and your plan for the next 3 years is to essentially bide your time until you get scouted into the v-league because you literally do not have anything left and you are doing everything your 15 years old and incredibly depressed self can because you refuse to let go of volleyball, no matter how lonely it makes you, no matter how much it hurts to cling on.

and then, AND THEN. that same scrawny dumbass from that 2-0 match in middle school is there and he still sucks and he's still the same kind of fucked in the head that you are and you won't give him one of your 'royal sets', not after what happened last time, you can't stop being lonely but you can at least try to not get abandoned again. and he says 'forget all that, i'll be here no matter what', and he spikes the damn set. he shuts his freaking eyes and he trusts you and you have just had the rug pulled out from underneath your damn feet because you understand, maybe better than anyone else, being ready to do whatever it takes to win but who the hell just fully puts their faith in someone else like that and maybe, just maybe, this kid was serious when he swore he'd get better and take you down.

he's invincible as long as youre there and so are you as long as you have him. you ask him if he's prepared to go all the way to the world stage to take you on, because you've never set your sights anywhere else, and he tells you he'll match you every step of the way. he picks up your crown, puts it right back on your head and proves to you that he refuses to leave you just like everyone else did, even at your worst. you tossed and he spiked and he said 'i'm here' and he is.

he is, and he never stops being here for you, chasing after you, making you chase after him, even when he's on the other damn side of the planet. and then 6 whole years after you first met him, first played him, first thought that maybe your grandfather would keep his promise to you, you get to play him again and you realise that he is your someone even better, always has been. actually, they all are. and you're not that lonely tyrant you used to be anymore, youre not that sad, abandoned kid hiding behind anger and obsession, you're doing the thing you love surrounded by people who love it in the same fucked in the head way that he and you do, and the man you love is there across the net from you, playing against you, and he's also there on the court next to you, playing with you, and either way he is here.

you got really, really good at volleyball, and somebody even better came and found you.

he's here.

[riacte]

so hey guys i finished dungeon meshi yesterday and i'm still thinking about it

[littlest-bugz]

Me, before going to the store: “Are we buying milk? We’re out.”

My dad: “nah, we dont have any money”

Me: “Its fine, I got it”

Meanwhile, my dad: *spending at least 70$ worth of guitar stuff he wont even use (because he plays guitar m ONCE A MONTH IF THAT).*

[puppmeo]

Have you ever been assumed to be romantically attracted to someone and even just the thought of that makes you want to throw up . Anybody

[dualitysdownfall]

im legally obligated to do a big dramatic sigh every time i remember that i have to get up early for school tomorrow

[bright-and-burning]

✨✨positivity chain! tag some of your favorite creators (artists, gif makers, writers, etc) and say what you love about them. Share with as many people as you’d like✨✨

oh man. doing this off the top of my head is so much pressure... any friends left off this list it is wildly unintentional and i am so sorry <3 this is gonna be super landoscar & co heavy. u kno how it is.

writers... well can i say everyone? truly. off the top of my head... @freeuselandonorris for the ability to get me interested in (or at least reading) Anything, @monacotrophywife for the funniest craziest concepts that spin out into deliciousness every single time, @vroombeams for the guaranteed gut punch no matter the length, im going to run out of unique ways to compliment my friends' porn i cant lie. @ocontraire who wrote THEEEE comfort fic of all time 2 me (little renaissance my fucking beloved),

@glasscushion and @strawberry-daiquiris who BOTH span the gamut of making my brain turn into sludge and also making me tear up abt being in love w ur best friend at christmas (what an odd venn diagram overlap), @foggieststars whose burning up fic i have (according to ao3 history) read 23 times (and who matches my freak like no other), @wanderingblindly for the sheer variety, @miamimaiden for the incredible aus,

@piastriachios for the bonkers-inducing markoscar, @chelemlem (dynamics that make u crazy fr). ok im cutting myself off. wait actually for some not-as-landoscar-centric writers i love: @leclercenjoyer (technically. Yet.), @userkritaaay (manifested jack's seat w the french-australian diplomacy project fic series and i am only half joking), @wormeo-and-juliette (funny and hot fic. queen of ensembles and large casts),

@landoisokay (whew. WHEWWWW. norrussell legend but also in general fic that leaves me dumbstruck), @wewentcarracing (lance expert and also prose expert), @alxalb (porn and awkward feelings alike that have had me face plant into my bed to recover). many many more that i am sure i am forgetting, i feel like im giving an oscars speech and theyre trying to play me off

artists!!

@dumbf1sketches (who i could not for the life of me remember the url of. tumblr should know who @.brid is), @udonli (drew me in w '''poorly''' drawn piastri on stats notes and now has me hooked for life, something so incredibly apt 2 me abt oscar drawn on grid paper), @roosterhouse (COMICS OF ALL TIME. theeee narrative artist to me like im beyond obsessed), @unknownaster (very warm art of my fave guys!!), @kichona-s (the lemon landoscar lives RENT FREEEEE the little x faces omg. cutest little guys on the planet).

for the more graphics-y artists, you cannot go wrong w @argentinagp (gifs also!!!!) and @alpinelogy <3 coolest posters on the internet honestly.

gif makers:

@insideparcferme (excellent compilation-y gifposts), @cuthechicane (always capturing moments i miss on broadcasts), @blueballsracing (variety act!), @oscarcito (always ready to provide oscar in 4k), more that i am for sure forgetting but these r people whose urls i remember seeing next to gifs in the last day!!

renaissance people:

@piastrisms gifs and fic both god tier!!! magical realism and tenderhorny pwp (occasionally w plot!) what more could u want from a writer. and @mecachrome THE triple threat of all time... art that feels like summer, gifs that feel like a cool + refreshing drink, fic that feels like the perfect sweet treat!!

i am so so sorry to whoever i have forgotten (or if ive forgotten you also make x but i only have you under y, my memory is full of holes), i am so lucky to know so many cool people but that makes it so much harder to list everyone off!!!!

[bookdragon-shenanigans]

Second Signet Analysis: Distance Wielding

Welcome to the first in a long series of posts where I do a round up of all of the "Violet Second Signet" theories in hopes to provide a (hopefully) complete list of all possible ideas so when Onyx Storm releases you won't be clowned because at least you can say, "Hey! I saw a theory post on this once!". 🤡🤡🤡

So since RY dropped the bomb that violet’s second signet has manifested in IF, my brain has been going BONKERS racking up possible signets. I’ve currently settled down on one theory that I guess could be correct. (Idk honestly) (or at least that’s what I’d write if I was in RY’s place)

VERY BIG DISCLAIMER: Although I try to stay neutral, some things in this post is my personal opinion. You do not need to agree with them and neither am I asking you to.

Anyways with that over, let’s start the analysis.

FOURTH WING/IRON FLAME SPOILERS AHEAD

Obviously the starting post had to be distance wielding because duh.

What is Distance Wielding?

As the name suggests, Distance Wielding lets a rider travel large amounts of distance within a short period of time (I'm going to guess it's just teleporting but with a fancier name?). As RY herself states-

“Are you a distance wielder?” I’ve only read about two riders in all of history who could cross hundreds of miles in a single step. -Rebecca Yarros, Chapter 55, Iron Flame

Now, it is to be mentioned that it was one of the only elements/signets that were actually name dropped during the second signet conversation.

There are many hints that Violet might be a distance wielder:

Violet is often described as extremely quick

There is one scene in Iron Flame which could either be a genius hint or bad editing:

I jolt upright in bed, reaching for my throat and gulping lungful after lungful of air, but there’s no cut, no ache, and when I turn the mage light on with lesser magic and a twist of my hand, I see there’s no blood, either. “Of course there isn’t,” I whisper aloud, the raw sound cutting through the silence of my bedroom as the first hints of sunlight lighten the sky to purple beyond my window. “It’s just a fucking nightmare.” There’s nothing that can touch me here, Xaden asleep beside me. [Xaden isn't supposed to be in Aretia if my timeline is correct.]

 Distance wielding is a signet that “Hasn’t been seen in centuries”. Do you know who also hasn’t been seen in centuries? ANDARNA.

Andarna always says “I’ll be right where you need me” and if that isn’t suspicious then idk what is

My opinion (?):

I was thinking distance wielding for violet at one point too. But then this appeared:

(some parts of quote cut out because it’s irrelevant)

“What’s your signet?” Mom shouts, but I lack the strength to lift my head. “Hasn’t manifested,” Aaric answers in a panic. -Chapter 64, Iron Flame

Now, from a writer's point of view, why would RY mention this line if not for it to be relevant? Aaric has bonded a pretty powerful blue dragon and his signet hasn't manifested.

It adds up to Aaric’s personality too. He ran away from home and is still trying to get away from his father. He's spent the entirety of IF running away. So distance wielding is perfect for him seeing as it can let him travel extremely quick (aka amazing for fleeing)

Anyways, that is all for this one cause the brainstorm has become a brainfog and I cant legitimately think anything rn. Let me know if I missed anything (please 🥺🥺🥺) and other signet theories you have so I can make sure I didn't miss anything!

[deepseasmetro]

i can kinda understand this person going ":/ unfortunately you Will need opinions on shipping discourse when people harass you". most people who say "proship antiship discourse is silly, i am an adult with a job" often mean "analyzing how we relate to media is for silly children, i don't have to care about this"

but obviously the actual serious position is "why the hell are you exclusively looking at this issue through the lens of fandom shit?" and you are extremely cool for having it. this website's inability to step out of its bubble and reframe social topics in real world terms drives me bonkers.

yeah thank you. my whole point is that if we're talking about "what kinds of topics should art and media be portraying", "how do you mindfully and respectfully portray said difficult subjects", or - indeed - the topic of being people harassed (at minimum) over the porn they draw or write - using "antiship" and "proship" is so crazy immature and tells me you arent REALLY interested in discussing these subjects in like, a mature and nuanced way - because you're using terms that literally mean "you cant ship whatever you want" and "you can ship whatever you want"

i dont give a fuck abt fandom shit, i care abt discussing the general issue of sex-negative attitudes and actions, i care abt discussing complicated portrayals of sexual assault and abuse, etc etc... i Do Not Give A Fuck about your bakudeku fanfics and the people who talk abt teenagers being shitty online as being "in a cult"

[velvetvexations]

a lot of my frustrations about trans discourse right now lie in the fact that we've created these categories dependent on people's psychological understanding of their gender, which i dont see as unimportant, especially on an interpersonal level. but to me it's just rlly obvious gender identity is not a good predictor of how someone is going to be treated socially or politically. i think the political consequences of being a certain gender r not going to be automatically assigned to someone when they identify as that gender, but as they begin to become that gender not just psychologically, but socially and biologically too.

but it's become increasingly difficult to talk about. to some ppl if i think that men (who dont know im trans) sexually harassing me is misogynistic then im misgendering myself. that is fucking bonkers to me.

i am genuinely very concerned about how we r going to protect this community if we cant even get real about the material circumstances that threaten us in the first place.

thoughts?

It's like I was saying the other day, transradfems believe gender identity is as solid and real as TERFs believe gender based on sex to be, which is just as incorrect. If you're a trans man, damn the details, you're a man, and if you're a trans woman transphobes will hate you the same way they would any cis woman rather than the men they perceive us to be.

It's...actually kinna pathetic? It feels like getting misgendered at school and deciding they just hate you because they're so jealous of what a great woman you are, except it's thirty year olds who think voting is a sucker's bet.

[neeksnicoboytoy]

PPARTY ROCKERS IN THE HOUSE TONIGHT. bokuto shows up in the worst outfit you've ever seen but hes confident so really it doesnt matter (or does it) he claims he is bringing "The Drip" to the party. no one agrees with him except nishinoya which really is a bad sign when you think about him as a person. konoha threatens to burn his closet down when he's least expecting it and that man is SERIOUS. bokuto actually briefly feels a full body chill . EVERYTHING about he's wearing is neon and mismatched nishinoya fucks with it soooo hard hes actually kind of jealous!! i think bokuto would wear a snapback i'm sorry he cant dance either. but just like with his outfit he is so outrageously confident that it does not matter all that much (to him). at least SOMEONE'S representing the bad dancers on the floor am i right? ha ha. actually no take that man away this is hard to look at. tries to do the worm and fails miserably so he's probaly bruised all over the day after!! claims the bruises are battle scars even though they are bruises and not scars!! cmon now. he attempts the worm every party everyone is fed up with him. i feel like hinata WOULD be able to do the worm which really should not be the thing that gets you impressed about someone but bokuto LOVES it and he tries to get hinata to dance with him every chance he gets. he reaaally wants the aux but all his friends are not impressed with Pitbull and bokuto IS a crowd pleaser after all so he refrains.

akaashi trailing behind the crowd wearing something so normal you wouldnt look twice at it but it looks insane when you look at the scene -> neon lights confetti loud ass music etc etc. this man is in BUISNESS casual like he's about to attend a moderately dress code wise relaxed 9-5 office job. when you ask him about his choice of dress he just blinks and wanders off to talk about something pretentious like the musical arrangement in radiohead songs with daishou (who has managed to incorperate his "edge cutting" read edgy style in everything he's wearing so he's basically gone eboy. it looks horrific but kuroo thinks it's cool either way. not that he would admit that though) he's not entirely sure why he became friends with daishou seeing that he doesn't like daishou all that much but he supposes it is nice to talk shit with someone. bokuto thinks they match (they don't) and is very excited about this. akaashi is the weirdest fucker at the entire party besides maybe kageyama. he dances shockingly badly for someone that pretty but everyone loves him and knows he's kind of shy so they support him either way.

hinata has looked up cool teenage party outfit multiple times before going so he would look just right but in the end he figured he would just go for what's comfortable and ends up wearing sport shorts and a sweatshirt kageyama gave him. the important distinction between his athletic wear and bokuto's mess is that bokuto picked something athletic on purpose and hinata just doesn't have any other type of clothes someone help him please yachi is in constant disbelief and horror. he was so nervous that he almost puked before showing up but once he arrives at the party he realizes they are in Japan and thus no omnious solo red cup will be showing up like he assumed(guys there is no alchol involved dont WORRY they are MINORS) (besides tanaka i think. that guy is insane). after that he is in his ELEMENT and goes bonkers. he talks to everyone in the house and everyone not in the house and everyone likes him! fucks up the dancefloor. good for him. starts playing volleyball in the backyard with kageyama once he's had his fair share of the dance floor and promptly passes out in the midst of a set. kageyama would be very concerned but has at this point gained so much acceptance for the miracle that hinata is that he assumes hinata is Just like That so he sort of chills besides the stiff and unmoving body of his best friend for a while

other special mentions on this topic:

-oikawa is a really good dancer but everyone tells him he's bad to piss him off. he gets so mad at this that he trips

-iwaizumi shows up in a muscle tee and the party goes quiet for a bit. sexualities are reconsidered and self-discoveries are made. it's a really ugly and ratty shirt with godzilla on it but since the focus is not really on the shirt no one minds besides kentarou who is sort of torn between feeling betrayed and proud

-kageyama bonds with kenma. kenma is not willingly participating in this but kageyama doesn't really care. he's too busy getting his ass kicked n mario kart (plays as mario)

-tsukishima doesn't like parties but yamaguchi LOVES them and dresses up all cute for them. tsukki gets dragged along every time

-tendou absolutely fucking HATES!!!! popular music. he says it's too boring and also too mainstream to appeal to him so he starts bringing along his own speaker to parties . it always clashes horribly with the already playing, louder music and everyone BEGS him to turn it off but tendou is nothing if not persistent so he just turns the volume up. what a man. i respect the hustle

-ushiwaka, sakusa and kageyama passionately talk about volleyball together. akaashi joins in for a bit but then is lovingly (read: aggresively) pulled to the dancefloor by bokuto and the group gives up any kind of rescue mission once they've caught a glimpse of bokuto's biceps. sorry buddy you'll have to handle this by yourself i guess

-yaku starts doing pushups across the room to flirt with nishinoya. it works a bit too well because nishinoya sees it as a challenge and they end up doing pushups for a while. nishinoya loses btw

-i do think that they ^ kiss later

-suga and oikawa both dress cunty and real recognizes real so they exchange numbers. i do think oikawa would piss suga off to no end but for a while he (suga) manages to ignore that. once the party is over they never talk anyone

-tanaka gets a new haircut impulsively. he and nishinoya march out of the bathroom and all of sudden he's blonde. no one really knows what to do with it but tsukishima despises that they're both blond now. the other blondes are seriously impressed and accept him into their group

[delphientropy]

please read our DNI before interacting. thank you!

actually, i honestly wanted to talk about our innerworld and system functions in general for a while. so im gonna talk about my system experiences for once i guess

for as long as we realized we were a system (which must have been around a year or less now) we always doubted ourself because our system was just... weird. thats why i never talked about it. i was very afraid of being fakeclaimed.

we do split from stress and trauma, and some of us do have jobs, but oddly, so many of us dont have any jobs at all. it seems like i, the host, do almost everything and am the sole provider of the system, and if i went dormant, everything would probably just collapse.

our innerworld is SO fucking weird. we have no idea whwere our dormant alters go- or most alters, really, because not that many alters have any access or memory of any innerworld. the sections in the innerworld are categorized by source (oddly, source plays a huge part in our system functioning for whatever reason), and even then its all so fuzzy and messy and off.

it all looks like the incomplete worldbuilding of a kid. loopholes, unanswered questions, random splits and no roles, nothing is organized and everything is chaos- bad memory, basically only one alter is doing everything ever and hes fucking stressing out (and nothing we can do about it because he cant voluntarily leave), random islands in fucking space— what about the oxygen? it really just screams made up fantasy world some child made. like our entire system is run by some small imaginative kid whos obsession for fiction and fantasy and chaos and yet also control while being disorganized.

ive been told many times that our coping mechanism is to avoid. forget. distract. comfort. thats why we have a MILLION fictives. its like a machine in the back of our mind, always humming, always making more fragments that act like characters we know and find comfort in. nah they dont have a role theyre just. there. it doesn't make sense. theres no gatekeepers, rarely protectors, just fictives. fictives with no roles just fictives and fictives and more fictives. one day itll work. every problem will go away if we just make more fictives, the machine whispers. if we just have more comfort, all of it.

i guess it all ties into our kind of trauma and our other disorders which cause chaos and disarray. everything is unexplained. the random pain. dormancy. the entire innerworld itself. its seems complex and structured on the outside, and it sure is creative, but theres no structure. its a kid throwing multiple concepts together to make a really dumb world and a dumb story with it.

if i could make it organized and make it function, i would, but i can barely see it. i cant make up shit and suddenly our brain functions normally. i cant pretend like our innerworld doesnt have patches and holes and never answered questions. i cant trust anything and suddenly it all works. thats why i dont like a lot of the advice im given. "just trust that your alters wont fuck it up and youll switch more!" i do trust them. there are some i trust with my entire being. but i just cant switch. it wont let me leave. im that inner childs favorite character, favorite doll, that needs to be out of the toybox at all times.

im so scared to try and get diagnosed or just any kind of help. because im sure i sound absolutely bonkers when you read all of this. but its a frustratingly bad functioning system. and currently, the only option i have is to just stay in front and do everything. i initially thought i had PDID for this reason, actually. im like the ""main alter"" but i certainly dont have any control over our world. i dont know what to do. and with how therapists keep abandoning me, i wish i could just heal and figure it out by myself. but i cant.

[brilliantfantasticgeronimo]

legend of ruby sunday let's gooo

TWO SHADES OF RED

ruby is so overhwelmed bless her lol

hOWS YOUR UNCLE. YOU SEXY BITCH SDKLFJ HOW YOU THINK!!!!??

they are making unit too quirky for them not to become a spin off lol

15 WILL flirt with your staff kate and you WILL endure it

screaming the clip was just the first clip. whats gonna happen

"Even I got that" SDKJ THE META

IS THAT SIGNIFICANT"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ya'll are so self-conceited. millions of people are called susana. / i say this while vibrating at the rate of a neutrino star

"susan IS the name of my grandaughter" NOT WAS. IS !!!!

"we'll get him" is that a musk ref. rtd, musk is not a genius lol

"but what for" asking the tough questions

(also regeneration as a disguise…. what a good idea)

JUST DONT GO CHANGING YOURS OOK

"cant we just pipe in a bit of applause " the meta……..

mel pulling a 73!yards ruby

"we have another mystery woman" "ruby sundayyyyyyyyyyy" "you could've warned me" wtf i love tem. i love this. absolute bonkers vibes for a finale. (the horrors will start at any second)

ruby/rose flirting…….. ?? :eyes emoji:

doctor who wasMEANT to have a bunch of middle aged / old

women characters

stsly i love this energy "I love devina" amazing.

"you love to break the rules" she knows her uncle so well

WE CAN SHARPEN THE IMAGE. ENHANCE!!!

im enjoying how the fantasy / scifi plot mystery is tied to this very real personal thing for ruby.

ruby rose holding hands………………. im seeing.

"they never give me proper work" gee i wonder why rose!!! you think your mom wants you out there doing torchwood style suicide missions. cmon.

"he was a postman. she was a dinner lady" hmm

MEL IN HER LIL' ORANGE SCOOTER. OBSESSED!!!!!!!!

CARLA ON ACTION!!!!!!!!! GO GO GO

go get miss flood??????? A???????????

IM ALWAYS HIDING MYSELF AWAY

dont leave it to her oh my god. rip cherry.

(btw god bless. the hallway crack from the christmas special is still there lol)

ms flood nailing the old relative backhanded compliment

IT'S ABOUT TIME I CAUSE TROUBLE FOR MYSELF

HE WAITS NO MORE!!!!!!!!!!!

NOT QUITE. NOT YET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

im vibrating so much

oof this is so good. this is so TRUE. "you need roots of your own not a senile old man" updated to "i bring disaster"" aggg

15 is so healthy guys. so healthy

"what if you just said hello to her face?" i cant believe this is happening ya'll. russel really said "the five doctors was BULLSHIT. im gonna fix-it fix this shit" and went and did it. icon

ill have some of that <3 !!!! (lol thats right kate. he'll never trust u like them!!! deal with it)

a phoenix is just a bird until it burns… awesome. what the fuck does that mean

thats right stammer. you're barred from unit. motherfucker 15 is so rude. love him

MANCHESTER MOMENT

MASSIVE INFORMATION FROM THE VHS. I LOVE THIS ABSOLUTE NONESENSE.

ooo the music did a little thing. hold on to your butts babes we about to get DRAMA

unit has better toys. but are they competentent? LOL

clara and the leaf energy tbh (complimentary)

(oh is ruby susan's daughter therefore 15' daughter????) love the snow thing tbh . rtd was like im about to give dw fanartists an easy motif to add to their art for years. thanks king "time has tides and hollows and secrets"

(this transition effect………. very pertwee era intro….. :eyes emoji:) memory is time!!!!

"you cant move" omg impossible mission moment. fathers day moment. 15/ruby dont know how to step moment!!!!!!!!!!!

this is rtd's thought process lol "time … memory… ah shit.. MEMORY TIME MACHINE THERE WE GO"

damn carla and ruby got me here.

"my memory of this keeps changing"

rip chipzode probably

T.T rubes

what the actual fuclk

Close the window!!!!

when is that thing, inspector spacetime???????

it's the beast!! (carla dont name the undefined thing on the "everything becomes what you name it season" o h my gOD)

I AM IN HELL

im loving the coloring/lighting in this episode. everyone looks very sharp and nice

"i bring disaster" hehe

finally some good fucking [kate vs doctor antagonism]

15 frustrated because he finally has to come back from buying the cigarattes/ bread

"FINISHED? STOP GRIZZLING AND FIX IT". mel!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats

mel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love you mel!!!!!!!!!!!!

rtd said im gonna write a season that is SO self referential. thank u

for writting this show for the weirdos only. (We might run out of disney money tomorrow but TODAY we relish)

brigadier picture!!!

missing episodes restoration commentary? lol (if i was rtd i would have named harriet ms. bachel color)

"i'd remember a handsome chap like you" um. let's no go there!!! thanks

i told u doc u absolute anxious nerd. there's millions of susans!!! (not convinced this isnt anything yet)

the music is doing things

"being an ambulance?" mel u have always been in doccy who. catch up!!!

reverse the polarity of the VHS

(ALSO very 00's/90's "therre's something hiding in the music if u play it backwards Zeitgeist ("Blink"'s dvd easter egg realness))

donna this is all ebcause you had to go and spill that damn coffee. chodizee's blood is on YOUR hands

leave the tardis alone… "then they get wise, and they try to destroy it"

"thank you, and i love you, and good bye" aaaaaaaaa

our tecnology spreads lies and fraud!!! im gonna count that as aBINGO. taking my prize in cash beebs. thank!!!

"you do not question, you move" ummmmm

master? rogue? valeyyard? rassilon? omega? suttek? omega??? rani?? ???

harriet arbingers. rip.

A DREAM OF A WORLD WITH ORANGE SKIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lol love this. going over the theories

THE MARA MENTION!!! TEGAN NATIO N WE R I S E

suketh!!!!!! well there it is lol (damn wish i had rewatch Pyramids so i could be more excited about this dklfjsdklfjdskldfs) (also def saw ppl on reddit calling that "second anagram" ou t sdklfjsd)

"did you think i was family, doctor?" rude.

CONCLUSIONS!!!

tbh this had a looooot of good character moments but i think it was mostly a "putting the chessboard pieces in place" episode. still tho damn, those characters moments. highlighting carla/ruby giving me emotions, sutekh/doctor taunting, doctor/kate antagonism MY BELOVED, ruby/rose (best ship name?????), doctor/mel!!!!!!!!!!!!!! being everything!!!!, doctor finally dealing with the susan of it all!!!! (ilu for this rtd). doctor/ruby being super cute and queer before experiencing THE HORRORS, idk how i feel about the reveal since tbh i didnt care much for that serial sdlfkjsdfds but hey. anyway excited for next week. tv show reveal def coming for the second-act-reversal !!!!!/is a hopeless case ALSO enjoyed the filming of this as well (snow! vhs effect!!!) and this is def the most interesting UNIT has ever been lol

[miusato]

I was wondering, do you have a ranking for Kotone ships? I assume Shinjiham is number 1, but I'm curious since you mentioned you liked them all

HMMMM maybe? I mean like I pretty much like all kotone ships since I'm biased and I like her althoughhh honestly some ships I just see more on platonic side but I salute anyone that ships her with a rare pair (provided its just not something entirely weird or borderline illegal lol)

Anyway, here's pretty much my ranking and thoughts for each ships lol:

1) Shinjiham - First of all, god Atlus doesnt FUCK AROUND with his SL route and it's so out of their fucking mind for Atlus to not let the girlies write for the romances in other persona ever again cuz WHAT THE FUCK???? They really fucking cook with his and Ryoji's SL its fucking sweet yet so tragic I just cant fucking take it anymoreeee 😭😭😭 and it fucking hurts me that even when you ended up not dating him, you can clearly see just how in love he is with Kotone like fuck man it hurtss

I am just such a sucker for the broody bf x cheery gf trope but they had me in my tits when they laced it with angst it had me bawling by the end of it. I really appreciate how in femc's route we finally get to see his true character like god before P3R we really only know him as that mean looking guy with a tragic broody past and he tries to make things right before its too late but we dont also see him trying to be better other than tiny mentions of it so when he is gone we dont feel bad other but P3P hooo boyyy shits fucked me up I miss him I miss my wife and even when I get to save him, even when he finally gains the reason to survive and have meaning to live, when the person that gives him that reasoning is gone, it fucking hits me like a truck man and that truck decides to reverse and run me over again. Absolutely spectacular shipping 11/10 dont fucking do that ever again Atlus I have inherited hypertension from my dad

2) Akiham - This is actually my initial otp before I blasted and fried my brain with foolmoon content. I was actually surprised to see this side of Aki where instead of him looking like he gets thing under control and cool all the time, he is just so clueless socially and every rank of him had me go "Holy shit he's autistic he's just like me frrrrr" like I didnt expect him to have awful social cues like me hskskssksk I also love how really cute the entire rank is like this boy is 18 and never dated anyone yet he is so sweet and thoughtful I almost forgot he probably learned this from the seventeen magazine in his room lmfaoo I love them they're the most tamed yet cute pair but also bittersweet and sad thinking that he lost everyone that he loves even after he proclaimed he will protect her ugh im in painnn

3) Theoham - I love how silly the entire route is! Its fun and relaxed and oh god what is up with everyone with white hair has autism in this game??? His lines are fucking bonkers it had me in tears and I cant even believe this man also manage to make me feel things about exposing one's hand after seeing it gloved for so long. Again Atlus please let the girlies cook again for the new persona i am begging you

4) Hamugis - idk if it was Atlus intention or not to make her pan but god I love this so much! Her entire route is her adjusting to being human and gaining human emotion gradually and I just really think its so beautiful when she said she doesnt even care if Kotone's a girl or a man she will still love her (Im sure she really meant it to be platonic and she pretty much mixed romantic and platonic but also that confession at the roof doesnt help at all I genuinely think she's in love with femc) and towards the end when she cried I can hear how human she is briefly like oh god I cant believe Atlus invented yuri

5) Yukaham - they're besties and she mentioned she wants a bf before okay whatever BUT I just refuse to believe she's into men honestly and she probably just wants a bf because thats what she believes girls should be (like obsessing over boys and such) and shes a girly girl so she should like boys, right?

Im not forcing anyone my HC at all so just ignore this if you want. Im writing this because the worm in my brain tells me to do it and i am also projecting myself here but like I just like the idea of Yukari feels conflicted about her sexuality because she's a girly girl and her liking girls doesnt fit the status as a girly girl but when she meets Kotone and she is feminine and likes girls stuff too but also a tomboy and doesnt really care much about the identity of being a girly girl and finds herself enamored towards her, she admits to her one day that she's having conflicted feelings about her and the other girls she finds oddly attracted to and Kotone's probably like "You should try to kiss me and see if you feel anything about it" and AKXHEIQPAUSQPAJQL oh god the thought of Yukari not knowing she's a lesbian and struggling to accept her identity as a lesbian is just so AAAAAAA i need more Yukaham content maybe I should draw them together

6) Mitsuham - I totally understand people's vision with Mitsuham. Actually at this point, you guys can see how Kotone brings impact to everyone in the team and towards the end of the game, everyone either finds a meaning to live or finally able to open up to each other but anyway shhh lets ignore the overall grim lore of this game and just focus on Mitsuru as a person instead. I really love the idea that Kotone introduce a lot of new things to Mitsuru since despite how rich and influential she can be, due to the responsibility and burden she has to hold at a very young age, she didnt get to experience what life is as a normal teenage girl so I just love the thought of Kotone teaches her what it feels to be a normal teenage girl like and gives her a glimpse of what it feels if she wasn't a Kirijo in the first place. Again, just a HC but like I think it would be so fun of Kotone and Mitsuru just sneaks out at night after she convinces her to forget her responsibility for a moment and loiters around town until it's the dark hour and Mitsu just freaks out because she was too distracted by having fun and being distracted by her duty and she was like I cant afford being normal, not in this world and not when she bears the name of Kirijo and oh god did I accidentally turn this into angst???? ANYWAYS yes I understand Mitsuham

7) Ryoham - Okay I have to admit, as much as bittersweet and tragic their whole relationship is (like the fuck as going on in Atlus' HQ when they wrote "Please touch me. Make sure I exist." Like ????) I'm just not into Ryoji much because of a personal reason but also like I love it when people draw them in an alternate universe where they meet again like I really believe in another life, they really do would fall for each other again ;w;

8) Juntone - Honestly I just see them as platonic but I saw this one Juntone shipper on twt before and I cant stop thinking of them whenever I have to think of this pair. Like okay shh imagine if Kotone isnt dead in the end but both of them still lost Chidori and Shinji, I know they both understands the pain but like if lets say they find confort in each other and down the line they do fall in love, I just think its really beautiful. Maybe not immediately but when years later theyre reunited and open up about their grief and still having a hard time to move on, I know they would clung on to each other just to feel absolutely alright because nobody can understand the circumstances they fall into.

Anyway, that's pretty much my ranking. I really do love and understand why people would love her with other pairing like I am all game but the ones I am pretty much very obsessed with is Shinjiham and Akiham while the others are more of an afterthought to me.

[shameboree]

i am actually going to whine about this publicly

my recent Poisoning Adventure was bc my psych NP (baseline can't be trusted) overdosed me on a new med I never shouldve been on and it caused pretty severe acute extrapyramidal effects (hella muscle spasms, uncontrollable jerking/movements, felt like i was in a fuckin dbz gravity chamber) and METABOLIC ENCEPHALOPATHY!! i couldnt control my body and even tho i knew who i was when it was where i was and why i was there i was also on a completely different realm of existence and it was like, Terrifying Actually!! so even tho im off that med and antidoted and not at risk anymore every time i have any kind of nerve tingling anywhere i start Freaking The Fuck Out. this shit was FOR REAL worse and more harrowing than literally any part of having cancer including the parts where i almost died. was more frightening than having meningitis bc at least i wasnt totally fuckin zooted outta my mind!! ur bitch needs Therapy. wowie!!

anyway ive been struggling w orthostatic hypotension for a hot minute (largely dehydration imo) so i got that rush u get when ur bp tanks and just started cryin like a little bitch babby on account of the Fears. Despite being super tired I am afraid to sleep bc the first bout of extrapyramidal symptoms woke my ass from DEAD SLUMBER

I used to love NPs but nowadays NP schools are clownhouse jokester diploma mills and due to scope creep ushered forth by the capitalist disneyfication of healthcare theyre allowed to practice WAY THE FUCK completely outta bounds. it isnt safe!! chikadee was makin nonstop bonkers med choices for me including putting me on the vers of a medication not even meant to to treat what we were trying to treat and also the correct version had limited success in.. the pediatric population?? babe what?? had to get my pcp involved on that one.

i had issues w nps before on account of all the probs w education and safety (theyre not even required to have 5 minutes of bedside experience outside of clinicals which ultimately are glorified techwork and useless in terms of Actual Nursing Practice (i do think having clinical experience IS Essential and beneficial tho)) but this trash ass dumbshit idiot gave me FRESH TRAUMAS i did NOT need so i have gone from a nonenthusiast to a full on hater. listen we did not go to med school we went to nursing school we should stay in our fucking lane. christ alive!!!!!

i cant fuckin believe this single experience was more traumatizing than actual months of chemotherapy

ALSO I GOT DENIED MEDICAL LEAVE?? WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THAT!!!!!!

[arshem]

i am going bonkers about the fucking facial animations in bg3. i cannot .believe how good they are. it's like aaAAH it's like. what!!!! i'm actually watching people's faces while they talk instead of just reading the subtitles and glancing at them every now and then because theyre actually doing things with their faces!!!! theyre emoting and communicating!!! im going wild i cant stand it. and the way!!! the WAY that astarion looks at you sometimes vs other times (being vague bc no spoilers <3) im like????? aaaaaaaAAAAAA,,

[intertexts-moving]

YOUR TAAAAGS YOUR TAGS YOUR TAGS YOUR TAGS. ok. off is kind of hit or miss for most people because its so weird and vague and i am extremely biased bc its one of my favorite thinfs ever BUT. i am going 2 say i think u will love it actually. its got soooo many fairytaleisms. its got tragedy. its got extremely morally grey characters. theres no good guys or bad guys. ITS GOT WEIRD LITTLE GHOSTS !!!!!! look at these bitches i used 2 doodle the off spectres in my notebooks like constantly they feel like home 2 me

the art style is so unsettling and creepy. its got sketchy lines and weird freak of nature characters. i am going to be EXTREMELY selfish here in saying that i think u will very much enjoy the art style and also i want 2 see how u would draw some of the characters bc ur style is very monochrome and messy (<< i mean this in a beloved sense i love your linework so much) and i think it fits the vibe so perfectly. on a completely unrelated note are you still taking commissions.

ITS GOT ONE OF THE ALL TIME BEST OSTS EVER BTW. i still have the main battle theme (which is called pepper steak btw. best name for a song ever) as my ringtone on my phone. my video game ost rank goes 1.portal 2 2. off 3. undertale 4. minecraft. the off ost holds higher regard in my brain than undertale. shaking your shoulders it fits the vibe of the game soooo perfectly.

i will not get into the story too much here bc i already talked about some vague spoilery stuff in that post and i dont want to tell u too much more in case u do play the game urself BUT. ohhh my god. i could talk about the story for hours. u can ask aster after we finished the game we sat on call for like 2 hours while i walked her through my personal take on the ending and then she gave me her thoughts on the ending and EVEN THOUGH WE PLAYED THE GAME TOGETHER AT THE SAME TIME (i streamed it for her) WE HAD DIFFERENT OPINIONS ON THE END. ITS SOOOOO FUCKING GOOD its one of those things where like. its so open ended that nobody ever gets into fights about what the "right ending" is because. well. there isnt one UGH i love that shit.

also zacharie is here. he is such a beloved character to me hes been one of my biggest huge comfort characters since like. 2015. i love him. hes like sans undertale for people in 2008. he was the original sans undertale. i think they would be best friends

oh also despite the fact that the setting is very much like. weird abstract, sort of fantasy sort of industrial, the main character is a fucking baseball player. hes so out of place its so funny

^ official art btw. to give u a taste of mortis ghost's art style. its so silly and weird i love it so much

OK THAT WAS MY OFF PROPAGANDA SORRY FOR INVADING UR INBOX I LOVE YOU also ive been in a huge off mood for like 3 days now and have not been able to talk about it so im EXPLODING now

OHHHHGHGHGHGHHH. MACKERELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL MAC U CAN'T DO THIS TO ME..... ohhhh my god. ok. ok yeah im pinky promising u right now i WILL play it. like. SOON. it looks so good hooly shit. game that i can TELL will rearrange my brain. also it looks SO nice... i like the art style so much. mac u are GETTING me here u KNOW what u are doing. u cant just go ros theres an unsettling morally gray tragic game with an incredible ost and weird art and NOT expect me to go fucking bonkers.