#hrt working its magic

[twiggybeing]

Looked in the mirror and realized I had rockin hips how are you doing

[confused-alpaca]

i cant keep living w my parents its killing me. but. living on my own would also kill me

[waywardsalt]

very freeing to actually own up (to myself) abt post-ph being an au. now i can make a little list of the little ways it deviates from leading to st

[toomanywatchers]

Imma bout to ask this man for his secrets because how in the gosh darn diddly FUCK does he obtain this level of gains while also eating like a garbage monster that hates vegetables??

God really does have favorites and I ain’t one of them😔

appreciation post for ryans biceps

[professionalchaoticdumbass]

works for everything (testosterone, estrogen, progesterone, blockers, etc) & effectiveness is on par with existing methods. frequency is anywhere from daily to monthly

[filurig]

a guy ive had in mind for a whileee its a crime i havent actually made an oc of my faeries yet so this guy!! this guy is actually the faerie that provides folke with funky fantasy hrt. more on them (and a bit about faeries) under the cut...

krillimir, or as they're known to many non-faeries, (spider's web) glasswing, is a rather newly adult faerie, having emerged about 3 years ago from their pupae. a bit of a free spirit in comparison to other faeries, they hail from the Hemarikkit Till colony to the south of vätterunda, perhaps the largest colony in the area with its main structures occupying a sunlit forest grove. due to the size and relatively stable nature of the colony, there was not a lot of pressure/demand on newly emerged faeries to take up a specific role, and krillimir preferred to keep their options open and thus chose to identify as a generalist.

generalist faeries can kind of take on less specific work than other faerie genders usually do, and especially work which involves collaboration with other species, and curious about the world outside of the colony, krillimir applied to be a participant in the colony's medical program - basically all faerie colonies have a medical program which involves a collaboration with the area's local tomtar, who will provide them with illusory magic to maintain their settlements and keep them hidden/protected. in return, the faeries offer their faerie dust, which can be finely tuned to affect an organism's hormone levels (as well as some other biochemicals) - this of course can be used to treat certain conditions, or as a way to alleviate pain, etc.

gullmar, who is folke's "tomte uncle" in a way, ended up visiting the Hemarikkit Till colony in search of a faerie that could help with folke's Trans Gender Blues (aka: provide him with hrt, after gullmar realised that folke was trans) and the freshly emerged krillimir would be assigned to him. due to the nature of the assignment, krillimir would just be permanently assigned to gullmar and comes by the granholm residence once every few months to readjust folke's hormone levels to the proper ones when the T levels start to fall off. while gullmar can find the faerie a bit neurotic and too energetic, their relationship grows to become amicable - a part of gullmar probably feels a fatherly instinct towards them hehe.

some extra faerie stuff i thought about making this guy so ill include:

faeries do not have a directly "spoken" language like we do, and communicate mostly through pheromones, body gestures and sounds like squeaking, trilling and hissing. they can communicate with other species through their pheromones, but as they communicate with said species in the target's language, things like names are often just directly translated. "krillimir" means "spider's web glass wing". how do we have the "romanization" of their name then? Well through some convoluted shenanigans. basically - tomtar have an anda-powered ability to learn the language of other species. with enough exposure and socialisation they will just naturally begin to gain an understanding of that language, and their ability has led them to be able to learn faerie language, especially helped by it also existing in a written form. while faeries don't speak this written language, it is how they conceptualise more complex ideas internally (the internal voice so to speak) - with the tomte ability, they can somewhat approximate what the language would sound like if spoken - at least filtered through the tomte brain. its most definitely not 100% accurate to what it would sound like though but most faeries accept it as close enough. this probably makes no sense but erm it sorta makes sense to me. LOL. but it means that most species that haven't learn to read faerie will only hear the literal translation when a faerie introduces themself, and thus many call krillimir by glasswing for short.

krillimir is a "generalist", which is one of many faerie genders. i made a post about it a while back! they go by they/them but generally doesn't mind he/she either.

faerie clothing is generally made of a fabric woven together by silk produced by them themselves - this silk is mainly produced by broodtenders or generalists. they also have a special way of "tanning" leaves, ending up with them having leather-like properties, which is part of what krillimir's outfit is made out of there! very popular reccuring symbols in their fabric design are "eye" "mimicry" and sometimes patterns which mimic some other animal/creature.

[gor3sigil]

About being a freak, queer, trans etc.

In all the years I've spent going back and forth with my gender, being sure one day and unsure the next about how I wanted to present, if I wanted to be more fem or masc, if I wanted to be neither of them, there's one thing that I never wished: I never wished to be born cis.

There's something so magical in being trans. To me it's like a never ending childlike wonder of myself and others. I see my body as a white canvas I can do anything with and as a playground for me to explore and find secrets at every turn. It's shedding so many times that I had hundreds of silhouettes and I'm not even 30. It's seeing the most deepest and honest smiles when you hang out with your peers, and they're fully themselves and you are fully yourself even if it's just for one moment.

Being trans is being more naked than ever. My understanding of my own flesh at its core like I'm dissecting it once a year is so whole and complete. Noticing the patterns, the intricate map of my skin, how it grows and stretch with every change even well before HRT as I was practicing new poses and expressions and clothes.

I don't see myself as a flower, I see myself as a whole garden, with bees and critters everywhere, bursting with life in the warmth of the sun under a sky as blue as the cleanest seas.

Regarding the way others see me, mind you, I always was, and I mean ALWAYS, all my life, seen as a freak.

Try to picture this, even tnough you maybe can because this is the story of a whole bunch of us: growing up as a goth, queer and undiagnosed autistic girl, in a little shitty town, the last child of a family of disabled and neurodivergent folks that everyone saw as a family of, well, freaks. The teachers at school knew your brother who was bullied, and your sister who always caused troubles. They don’t know which of these paths you’re going to take but they sure as hell don’t like you. And the only other queer kids you know are a couple of girls who’d chugg down vodka before class in middle school because they were not accepted at home and bullied during recess.

My first queer relationship, also in middle school, was the typical “I loved her to the moon and back but she only wanted to experiment” and it tore down my soul. It took me years to recover from this. I think that, apart from my longest relationship to date, I never put that much of myself into someone I loved. But she was just goofing around and I mean, fair, we were kids, but man did it hurt. I resented her for years after. Now I just hope she’s happy and doing the job she always dreamed of doing.

Anyways, all that to say that I was used to being seen as an outcast. I hated that for years and tried and tried again and again to fit in. It doesn’t work. Because this in not the answer. Remember when I said that my family members were always all disabled ? My father espacially was physically disabled (and probably also autistic but undiagnosed), and he’s still to this day one of the most ableist person I’ve ever met. He knew his kids weren’t “normal”. He fought tooth and nails for us to fit in. Because that’s how he survived. But despite it all, it never worked. Because you can’t force your way into society’s standards.

I never felt more free than when I just gave up trying to. If I was going to be seen as weird anyways, might as well go all the way. Dress as I please, date who I wanted (another story for another time but it didn’t go as planned), enjoy the shit I enjoyed, unapologetically. And guess what ? It stopped the bullying. Because I gained confidence in myself and most of all, pride. I grew proud of being an outcast, so much so that people just started to be like “well, they’re like that anyways” and left me the fuck alone.

I’m rambling lmao but I think it’s important to be aware that nobody will live your life for you. Being your weird self, it’s so hard, butn so rewarding. More rewarding than anything. You’ll start making new relationships based on you TRUE self, you’ll go all the way for your passions, and trust me, you’ll be more free than anyone who bent themselves to fit in the mold and still need to painfully stretch their limbs everyday to keep the act on.

I know that sometimes it’s something you have to do to survive, and that’s perfectly okay. But don’t forget to keep your true self close and to let them out from time to time, okay ? Water down your inner garden. That’s the only way you will truly live.

[sciencetynan]

HRT cured my social anxiety

HRT is magic.

In less than a week, it cured my social anxiety. Like completely. Dysphoria was the cause of it. I had no idea.

This anxiety has ruined my life. Its why I've had no friends, and only one short relationship in my life.

This is real proof that I'm Trans. I had lingering doubts until now.

I have tried everything in my life to get rid of this anxiety. Nothing ever worked. I felt like I was cursed and blamed myself a lot.

The amount of relief I felt today was unreal. Its like having a buzzing noise in your ear 24/7 for 30+ years, and suddenly its gone. I just feel so at peace and happy right now.

[azulcrescent]

Hey Azul, hope you've been doing well!

I was wondering if you have any tips on beginning my transition? I'll be headed to college at summer's end next year, which is when my parents said it would be best to start my transition (which I agreed with, sorting that out with my highschool would not have been worth it this late in the game)

Halo. I'm trying my best to be okay.

As for tips on transitioning.... in terms of college advice, try to find a queer group at your college, I didn't do that when i was at college cuz i was in deep denial, but you seem to be past that stage so its good. Having a community can help immensely. I don't know how medical transition works where you live, but a general tip that i can give is to give it time. HRT takes a while to work its magic but it can REALLY work its magic. Another tip/advice is that depending on how progressive your college is, interacting with non queer people can be difficult depending on how you present yourself. There's a very awkward period in transitioning where you don't fully pass, or look like your preferred gender but you don't really look like your assigned gender at birth either. That part is VERY difficult to navigate, and honestly to save the hassle, i don't think staying stealth is a bad thing when it comes to non-queer people. If people ask, *generally* speaking, you can tell if someone is just curious or if they want to stir shit up. Trust your judgement. If someone is really curious and is respectful towards you it can be very helpful to walk them through your experience and yourself, (tho doing that again and again can be tedious, but can net you friends or just pleasant classmates). On the other hand, just act oblivious with people who want to start shit. Don't engage, and just avoid them. Oh yeah, another thing. I know its really hard, but try your best at voice training, if you want to blend in and pass. Its kinda OP cuz if you look androgynous and have a passing voice, you automatically register as your preferred gender. While I wish it wasn't the case, your voice not passing when your appearance does can be quite detrimental, so i would say voice training is very very important. (as for HOW to train it, there's a whole bunch of voice training discords nowadays, and TRANSVOICELESSONS on youtube has some good tutorials) Good luck with your journey!

[twiggybeing]

I think my skin is softer

I hope it is actually softer

Like where I shave isn't really, but other parts of my face feel a bit softer

[kallie-den]

Renewable Energy

Ziratha, an intrepid young succubus researcher, finds the ultimate solution to the looking Succubus Energy Crisis: a device that brainwashes its subjects back into nourishing, delicious, easily-flustered virgins - even rough, experienced, punk trans girls like Vivi

This was a delightful commission from GrillFan65, one of my patrons, and features a very, very fun TF ;)

If you enjoy my work and are looking for more, or you want to support me, I strongly encourage you to check out my Patreon! I write erotica full-time, which means I need your patronage to keep creating, and my Patrons also get benefits like early access to my stories, extra stories, and the ability to vote on what I write next! So, if that sounds good to you, head over and join the couple hundred patrons I already have :)

---

“Wow. This is a succubus’s lab?” The crust punk trans girl looked around Ziratha’s research laboratory and sniffed. “I would have expected more candles. Magic circles. Maybe a few jars of goat semen or something.”

Ziratha the succubus rolled her eyes as the punk laughed at her own bad joke. “That’s a stereotype. You’d think humans would know better now. We’ve been living amongst your kind for decades now, and-“

“And succubi are simply people just like us, living perfectly normal lives, except for the whole needing sex for subsistence thing,” the punk interrupted. “Yeah, yeah. I’ve heard the history lesson before.”

Ziratha had to suppress a groan. Alongside her PhD research, a full-time job in its own right, she worked part-time as an adjunct making minimum wage. She’d forgotten what a good night’s sleep felt like. Half her blood was coffee. She was way too tired for this.

Unfortunately for her, this punk girl - Vivi - was the best shot she was going to get at seeing her research reach fruition.

“Anyway,” Vivi piped up, “hurry up and tell me why I’m here already.”

“You’re here,” Ziratha replied tersely, “because I caught you breaking a window at the back of the lab. Probably looking for something to sell. And because if you help me out, I can delete the feed from the security camera. Got it?”

“A girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do,” Vivi shot back. “HRT ain’t free, you know?”

Ziratha sighed. In truth, she didn’t hold the attempted theft against her. It was simply that the succubus really, really needed just one single research subject. One was surely all it would take to get the funding board to sit up and pay attention.

“So, c’mon,” Vivi insisted. “What do you need me to do?”

Ziratha took a very, very deep breath. “OK, let me explain. Firstly, what do you know about the SEC?”

Vivi sniffed. “Sounds familiar.

“The Succubus Energy Crisis,” Ziratha told her patiently. “We succubi depend on energy harvested from our sexual partners. You clearly know that much. However, what you may not know is that sexual energy isn’t a sustainable resource.”

“How’s that?” Vivi seemed more interested in scoping out Ziratha’s messy lab than in the answer.

“The amount of energy a succubus harvests from her partner is inversely proportional to their sexual experience,” Ziratha went on. Reciting this was practically automatic. She’d been over it a hundred times in class. “The potency of sexual energy declines after, well, sex. Especially sex with succubi. The more we take, the less they have to give. Sex with ‘well-used’ partners yields negligible energy - and furthermore, might actually kill the human.”

“OK.” Vivi laughed offhandedly. “So what? There will always be more virgins, right?”

“That’s what people used to say about coal and oil,” Ziratha pointed out. “As it turns out, no. Thanks to a declining birth rate, an increasingly sexualized culture, and a constant expansion of liberal sexual mores into untapped parts of the world, reserves are depleting faster than they can naturally refill. Humanity’s store of sexual energy is trending towards zero. Starvation for succubuskind.”

“Right…” Vivi said skeptically, before shrugging. “I don’t see what that’s got to do with me.”

“I was getting to that,” Ziratha retorted. “I’m working on a solution, OK? See, traditional succubic magiscience holds that the depletion of sexual energy following virginity loss is a spiritual-metaphysical phenomenon. In other words, completely and totally irreversible. But that’s bullshit!”

Vivi looked up sharply at the sudden outburst of passion from the succubus.

“Those idiots in the academy just don’t want to let go of their precious little doctrines!” Ziratha fumed. “They’d rather sink billions into pipe dreams than admit the textbooks could be wrong.  I mean, the SuperCharm Collider? Seriously? It’s a joke! But once I get my funding, I’ll be the one who’s laughing!”

She let out a loud, rich cackle worthy of her demonic forebears.

“See, my research indicates that the source of this problem is purely neural-psychological,” Ziratha ranted. “In other words: if you can turn back the clock on someone’s mind, you can completely refill their sexual energy. It’s a perfect solution. Renewable energy for all, forever. But the Institutional Review Board won’t give me the damn funding for a proper set of clinical trials.”

“Hold up,” Vivi broke in. “Are you about to tell me that I’m your guinea pig? And… you want to turn me back into a virgin?”

Ziratha grinned, her eyes flashing behind her nerdy glasses. “Exactly! Behold my Transcranial Magical Stimulation Unit. Which I expect to be known more widely as: the revirginization helmet!”

Reaching over to her workbench, she picked up something that looked halfway between an old VR headset and a military-issue tin foil hat.

Vivi folded her arms over her battle vest. “There’s no way I’m wearing that.”

“It’s safe!” Ziratha insisted defensively. “I made sure of it. If it wasn’t, this would kill my entire career.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” Vivi replied, unconvinced. Then, she tilted her head to one side, and a crafty, dirty grin slowly spread across her face. “Hey. How about you and I go someplace comfortable and find a solution to a different kind of energy crisis?”

“Huh?” Ziratha blinked.

Vivi kept grinning and winked.

“Oh, I see.” Ziratha smiled wearily. “You want to have sex.”

Vivi giggled and nodded. “Don’t take this the wrong way,” the punk girl said, “but you look like you could do with a little top-off.”

Ziratha frowned. “Rude!”

In truth, though, she couldn’t be too offended. It had been a long time since Ziratha had fed properly, and it showed. Proper, nourishing partners weren’t easy to come by. Her deep red skin had taken on a slightly unhealthy pallor, her horns were nubs, and her tail was just a thin, dainty little thing. It was a far cry from the kind of overbearingly transhuman appearance succubi could have if they were permitted to glut themselves to their hearts’ content.

Admittedly, Ziratha wasn’t exactly playing to her own strengths. Instead of anything particularly alluring, she was dressed in the universal uniform of the overworked grad student: an old t-shirt, grey sweatpants and comfy sneakers, with a lab coat over top. Her hair was tied back in a hasty ponytail, her huge, round glasses made her look like exactly the nerd she was, and she hadn’t bothered with any makeup to hide the dark circles under her eyes.

Beneath it all, though, she still had a killer body. She was still a succubus, after all.

“What do you say?” Vivi proposed. She glanced pointedly at Ziratha’s chest. “Wanna turn those C-cups into something bigger?”

Ziratha was surprised Vivi knew so much about how energy levels affected succubi. “You’ve slept with my kind before?”

“Sure have.” Vivi’s smirk was infuriatingly cocky. “A few times. And don’t worry - they were never disappointed. I know just how to treat a girl - mortal or demon.”

Ziratha rolled her eyes at the lewd comments, but she was smiling too. This made Vivi the ideal test subject. It was what Ziratha had been hoping for when she’d first laid eyes on her. Vivi was tall, hot, and confident, and while Ziratha knew better than to judge a book by its cover, Vivi did look like someone with a certain amount of ‘experience’.

She was pure punk, top to bottom. Vivi was wearing a battle vest covered in patches and spikes over a simple, loose-fitting top, and beneath the belt she had on a pleated skirt, some torn stockings, and an impressive pair of boots. A lot of the skin she was showing was covered in ink, and both sides of her head were shaven, leaving her with a messy streak of hair that was dyed neon blue.

Ziratha would have been pretty shocked if Vivi had told her she was a virgin.

“As attractive an offer as that is, I’ll have to decline.” Ziratha didn’t bother to conceal her weary sarcasm. “You’re a guinea pig.”

Vivi rolled her eyes. “Fine. I guess I can think of worse things than getting my ‘sexual energy’ replenished - whatever that’s gonna feel like.”

“Great. Great!” Ziratha immediately started ushering Vivi deeper into her lab before the punk could change her mind. “Take a seat, please.”

She gestured towards a chair that looked like it had been ripped out of a hospital examination room, with all kinds of wires and machines hooked up to it. Vivi glanced at the chair dubiously, but still moved to sit down.

“What’s all this, huh?” she asked, settling.

“Just monitoring equipment,” Ziratha explained. “Taking your vitals, measuring neural readings. That kind of stuff.”

“Nerd stuff, got it.” Vivi winked. “OK. I’m ready, I guess.”

Ziratha could barely contain her excitement. This was it. Her breakthrough. Her triumph. But the succubus was too much of a scientist to count her chickens before they hatched. “Here. Put this on.”

She handed Vivi the helmet she’d spent hundreds of hours designing and building. The punk looked at the strange, ramshackle device even more dubiously than she had at the chair, but she did as she was told. Once the helmet was properly adjusted, the screen mounted to it hung in front of Vivi’s face, obscuring most of her vision.

Ziratha tapped a few keys on her laptop and the screen came to life. A few lights and indicators on the helmet started to glow and flash, and the whole apparatus began to hum as the large capacitors mounted to it started to charge.

“Hey, so, how long is this going to take, anyway?” Vivi asked. The punk sounded a little less brash and a little more uncertain now. “Is this, like, some kind of long-ass meditation thing? Because I have places to be.”

“No, don’t worry,” Ziratha answered. “It’s much quicker than that.”

The succubus tapped a few more keys, checked a few readouts, and then hammered the space bar.

There was a huge, bright flash, like an old camera going off.

Vivi went still and stiff for a moment, and then groaned faintly.

“What the fuck?” she complained. “What… was that it?”

“That was it,” Ziratha confirmed. Her tail was very straight, and her voice was thick with anticipation. “How do you feel?”

“My head is throbbing.” Vivi slipped the helmet off her head and blinked as her eyes readjusted. “You could have given me some real warning, you know. So, did it work?”

Ziratha glanced at her laptop screen. “According to the diagnostics, it should have worked.”

“How’s my, uh, energy?” Vivi asked, a faintly mocking smile on her face. “Any of your fancy instruments tell you that?”

Ziratha simply returned the smile. “Oh, I don’t need any instruments for that at all.”

The succubus reached out and took Vivi’s hand, and let her demonic sixth sense for energy tell her everything she needed to know. Her smile immediately became a wide grin. Oh yes, it had worked. Succubi could always tell when someone would make a good meal. It was no different from any other predator’s sense of smell, although physical contact made it far more precise. Right now, Vivi had the scent of a ripe, untouched virgin.

This was it. The breakthrough Ziratha had long searched for. Her invention was about to change the world.

Despite such heady thoughts, though, Ziratha wasn’t celebrating. Something else had caught her attention. There was something very strange about the way Vivi was reacting.

The punk girl was trying not to let it show, but she kept squirming and shifting in her seat. A distinct pink blush was showing in her cheeks, and Ziratha could feel Vivi’s palm starting to turn hot and sweaty as they held hands.

The succubus tilted her head. Now this was very, very interesting.

“Vivi,” Ziratha said. “How do you feel now?”

Vivi couldn’t seem to meet her gaze. “I-I’m fine,” she blurted out in reply. “It’s nothing.”

Ziratha wasn’t buying that for an instant. She had a succubus’s instincts. She could tell when someone was seriously flustered. Experimentally, Ziratha lent in closer and squeezed Vivi’s hand.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes! Jeez!” Vivi’s voice was a little too strained. Under Ziratha’s watchful gaze, she twitched tellingly. “You’re just being kind of l-lewd.”

Lewd? Just by holding her hand? “Fascinating…” Ziratha murmured.

The succubus pulled away, allowing Vivi to breathe a sigh of relief, and inspected some of her equipment readouts more carefully.

“It clearly worked,” she said, as much to herself as to her test subject. “But there’s signs of something else, too… hey, Vivi. Remind me: you’ve had sex, right?”

In contrast to her earlier, cocksure attitude, Vivi now looked like a deer in headlights at the question. “W-w-well, yeah! Of c-course!”

“So your memory hasn’t been affected, just…” Ziratha murmured, before turning back to Vivi and clapping her hands. “I think I know what’s happened!”

“What?” Vivi demanded. “I mean, uh, nothing. Obviously. But what?”

“Just as I was hoping, my revirginizer helmet completely returned you to a virgin state regarding your reserve of sexual energy,” Ziratha explained. “But I theorize that it also affected some of your closely-related inhibitions, skills, and arousal responses.”

Vivi blinked. “And what does that mean? English please.”

“Well, do you remember being a blushing, nervous, inexperienced teenager, years ago? Remember how much ‘steam’ you had to blow off on a daily basis? Remember how it made you feel when a girl so much as looked at you?”

Vivi nodded, and waited for Ziratha to say something else. But when Ziratha just glanced at her significantly, the punk girl turned as white as a sheet.

“N-no way,” Vivi protested. “You can’t be serious.”

“I’m afraid so.” Ziratha giggled. “It’s all connected, it seems. Congratulations. In just about every way that counts, you’re a virgin again.”

Vivi turned from white back to red upon hearing the v-word said out loud. She made to stand up. “I-I can’t believe you did this to me. I gotta get out of here.”

“Wait, wait,” Ziratha urged. She moved to Vivi’s side and calmed her with a simple hand on her arm. “I should really run a few more tests. Just to make sure.”

The succubus’s nostrils flared. She was shocked at how potent Vivi’s energy now felt. It was palpable, even when they weren’t touching. She could sense it in the air. Clearly, she had to investigate further. All in the name of science, of course.

Vivi was back to looking flustered, but she still threw a mutinous glare at Ziratha. “Y-you’re crazy! I can’t believe I even…”

Ziratha swiftly decided that if the betterment of succubuskind wasn’t a good enough reason for Vivi, she’d have to resort to other forms of persuasion. She bent down at the waist, putting her face close to the punk’s, and made her eyes very big and alluring.

“Please?” she whispered, in a voice that was suddenly soft and intimate. “Won’t you stay with me?”

Vivi looked like her body temperature had just shot up ten degrees, and Ziratha noticed that she couldn’t seem to meet her gaze properly. The succubus was sure she wouldn’t have fallen for that five minutes ago, but now she was a total sucker. “S-s-sure,” Vivi managed, in a strained voice.

“Wonderful.” Ziratha licked her lips. The distinctive virgin-scent Vivi was starting to give off was just delicious. “These readings - and reactions - are extraordinary. And I’ve done nothing more than hold your hand.”

Vivi whimpered plaintively.

“I can’t help but wonder,” the succubus murmured, “what kind of yields you might produce with slightly more purposeful stimulation.”

Vivi’s eyes registered alarm but, before she could protest, Ziratha slipped closer and planted a kiss on the punk girl’s cheek.

Her reaction was as immediate as it was striking. Vivi let out a faint gasp and her back arched slightly, even though she was clearly trying as hard as possible not to show it. But even more striking was the intensified deer-in-headlights look in her eyes, like she was desperately struggling to figure out what this meant and what she should do about it, even as she was so devastatingly flustered she couldn’t even manage basic addition.

Ziratha’s nostrils flared again. This was amazing, and she was starting to become aware of just how long it had been since she’d had a real feeding.

“Wow,” she said teasingly, momentarily letting her instincts get the better of her. “Just from one little kiss, huh?”

Vivi whined indignantly. "I-it’s not… that’s… t-this is nothing!”

“Yeah?” Ziratha couldn’t resist a giggle. “It’s just so funny - you seemed so cocky before. So experienced.”

“I am experienced!” Vivi tried to insist. “I’ve f… um… fu… I mean, you know… I’ve had s-s-s-“

Ziratha’s grin just kept growing as she watched the previously fierce punk trail off, her blush growing steadily deeper as she struggled to bring herself to actually say it. The transformation was quite the sight to behold. She had to keep pushing Vivi further. She just had to. It was part of the experiment, somehow, she reasoned. The succubus took advantage of Vivi’s helpless spluttering to press closer still and put her lips right by her ear.

“Sex?” Ziratha breathed, pouring as much suggestion and seductive glee as she possibly could into that one, single word.

Vivi looked like she was about to explode.

“You see?” Ziratha drew back, smirking victoriously. “You’re not experienced. Not really. Not anymore. You can remember that you’ve had sex before - but that’s it. And you can barely even bring yourself to think about those memories, because you might get too worked up. Neither your mind nor your body knows how to handle it.” She giggled. “Typical virgin.”

“I-I’m not…!” For a moment she thought Vivi was about to start tearing up, but then the punk girl managed to rally herself. “Y-you’re just messing with me! That’s all! It’s your stupid little machine, making me all confused. T-that’s the only reason I can’t think straight right now. I’m not, um, w-worked up.”

“Yeah?” Ziratha challenged. “Then explain this for me, please.”

She reached down and rested her hand firmly on the big, unmistakable tent in Vivi’s skirt.

Immediately, Vivi went as white as a sheet. Clearly, until that moment, she hadn’t noticed the huge hard-on she was sporting. She attempted a protest, or perhaps an explanation, but all that came out was a few strangled, incoherent sounds.

“My, my.” Ziratha licked her lips again, without even realizing it. She was so very hungry. “You see? You’ve become so adorably excitable.”

Vivi whined as Ziratha started stroking her fingertips along the surface of her bulge. “Y-you can’t just… what the hell are you d-doing? This is harassment!”

“I’m a scientist, Vivi,” Ziratha chided, in a voice that made her sound anything but scientific. “After my experiment, it’s only natural for me to give you a nice, thorough examination.”

The punk girl let out another whimpered protest, seeming to sense Ziratha’s ulterior motive, but under the succubus’s ministrations that soon gave way to a weak, pitiful moan. The new virgin was like putty in Ziratha’s hands. The power, the energy, the scent - it was all intoxicating.

“In particular,” Ziratha decided, “I think it’s only proper that I get a reading on your, ah, endurance. I really think - I really do think - it could be very, very scientifically interesting.”

Science was increasingly slipping out of view. Ziratha’s gaze was set firmly on the huge tent in Vivi’s skirt, and it was getting harder and harder to think clearly. After a little teasing, that sweet, sweet virgin energy was coming off Vivi in waves. The laboratory was thick with its scent.

Vivi was still giving the succubus that achingly alluring deer-in-headlights look, but after a moment, her willpower started to wane. She nodded. Ziratha’s nostrils flared. That made sense too. What kind of virgin had the resolve to say ‘no’ to a succubus?

In exchange, Ziratha decided, maybe it was time to make good use of some of the inherent succubic talents she’d spent all of grad school neglecting.

Ziratha straightened up and, as Vivi watched, shrugged out of her heavy lab coat. As it fell to the ground, she reached up and removed her hair tie, shaking her head to make sure her hair cascaded down around her face. Vivi was all but hypnotized by the sight.

But that was only the beginning.

Next, Ziratha took her t-shirt by its hem and lifted it off over her head. She moved slowly, though, letting the helpless punk watching her savor the sight of her tummy and cleavage being revealed. The way she slipped out of her sweatpants was even more seductive. She made a dance of it, swinging her hips from side to side as she peeled them away from her body to expose her long, sculpted legs.

The striptease left Vivi with a little trail of drool escaping one corner of her mouth. She couldn’t seem to stop leering. Her eyes were shining like she couldn’t believe her luck, and the tent in her skirt was now marked with a growing spot of damp precum.

Underneath her clothes, Ziratha wasn’t wearing lingerie, merely a comfy sports bra and a matching pair of boxers. But that, she decided, was plenty to work with when it came to a virgin.

And from the look on Vivi’s face, she was right.

“Tell me,” Ziratha panted, “have you ever gotten a lap dance before?”

Vivi looked almost panicked as she shook her head.

“Great,” Ziratha purred. “Then I suppose this will be a genuine first.”

Effortlessly, the succubus eased her weight into the examination chair, and backed up inch by inch until her naturally huge, curvy ass was pressed right up against Vivi’s hard bulge.

Vivi squeaked like a mouse.

At this point, her every little noise and twitch was like a red rag to a bull. The newly-restored virgin’s scent was so thick in the air Ziratha could taste it. Her hunger was awakening instincts she’d never known she had. Moving to the sound of unheard music, she started grinding and gyrating like she’d been doing it all her life.

The effect the lap dance had on Vivi was nothing short of explosive.

The punk looked like every bit the virgin she now was. Her eyes were wide and practically bulging, and her mouth was contorted into a goofy, uneven shape halfway between an amazed grin and a look of desperate, anxious disbelief.

She looked like she was about to blow.

“C’mon,” Ziratha mocked, in a voice dripping with honey and brimstone. “You can do better than this, right, virgin?”

Her teasing elicited another strangled whimper that just made the succubus want to push Vivi further and further. She danced her way up the punk girl’s body and turned to face her, rolling her hips as she pushed her ass back out behind her to grind into her throbbing bulge.

“Be a good girl,” she teased. “Hold on a little longer for me.”

Vivi just nodded haplessly. Her eyes were scrunched up closed, and she was gripping the sides of the chair so tightly her knuckles had turned white. Ziratha could just imagine what was going on in her head. Baseball scores. Times tables. Whatever she needed to help not utterly humiliate herself.

“Let’s see if you can handle something a little more… direct.”

Ziratha arched her and straightened her tail, daring the virgin punk writhing beneath her to open her eyes and stare at her amazing tits. Then, she reached back and used her deft fingertips to unfasten Vivi’s skirt. Vivi let out a moan that was as much protest as eagerness, but it didn’t stop Ziratha from using the motion of her hips and thighs to slide the garment out of the way, and then pull aside her panties until her hard, leaking cock was completely exposed.

Zirath’s long, forked tongue lolled out of her mouth as she stared at it, dripping drool down onto Vivi.

She needed it.

“Good news, punk,” she breathed, shivering. “You’re about to get your cherry popped.”

“W-w-what?” Vivi exclaimed pitifully.

“It’s, uh, for the experiment,” Ziratha reasoned. She was frenzied as she tore off her bra and panties. “I need to sample, uh… and, well, get a reading on the volume of…” She rolled her eyes and licked her lips. “Actually, forget the science. I’m just hungry, and you’re ripe for the eating.”

“B-b-but!” the trans girl spluttered, as Ziratha positioned herself against her cock. “I-I don’t know if I’m ready yet!”

“Yeah?” Ziratha paused, bemused.

"I mean… uh…” A bashful look came over Vivi’s face. “It’s just… I maybe… I wanted it to be special. You know?”

“Oh my god.” Ziratha snorted a laugh, and grinned wickedly. “You are going to be just delicious.”

In a single motion, she dropped her hips and impaled herself on Vivi’s cock.

Immediately, Vivi’s voice shot up an octave, and she let out a girlish cry of absolute pleasure. Right after, Ziratha’s rich, gleeful moans joined the chorus. The succubus couldn’t believe how good the virgin’s cock felt. It wasn’t just the sensation. It was the sustenance. Merely being in Vivi’s presence for the last few minutes had made Ziratha fiercely hungry. Now, at last, that hunger was being sated.

Once she recovered from the initial hit, Ziratha started moving her hips and bouncing greedily on the end of Vivi’s shaft. With each bounce, the punk girl underneath her thrashed madly in a clumsy, instinctive attempt to meet Ziratha thrust for thrust.

She mostly failed. But the attempt, at least, was adorable.

As she rode the sensitive, inexperienced punk, Ziratha started howling with glee. She’d never had the pleasure before, but it was true what they said - there was nothing like milking a virgin. Her body was humming with energy, and every time she buried Vivi’s cock to the hilt inside her pussy, the sensation got sweeter and sweeter. Something about the flavor of a virgin’s energy was utterly transcendent, and it was made all more nourishing by what it represented.

Ziratha’s complete and total victory.

Unsurprisingly, it wasn’t long before Vivi’s moans started to peak, signaling that she was at the edge. Clearly, despite her memories, the virgin had absolutely no stamina. Ziratha wasn’t going to complain. The orgasm was the sweetest part of the meal.

“Go ahead!” Ziratha urged. “Blow your load already. We both know you can’t hold back anymore.”

With a cry of absolute, mortified bliss, Vivi exploded inside her.

Ziratha’s moans peaked too when she felt Vivi’s virile, nourishing cum paint her insides. It was better than anything she’d ever felt before. The power, the pleasure, the feeding - all of it. Ziratha could already feel her body priming itself to swell and change with the infusion of fresh energy.

The ecstatic rush of it made her greedy. She wanted more. She wanted it all. Ziratha squeezed down on Vivi and started riding her harder and faster than ever. Every bounce, every thrust, coaxed more and more sweet, sweet cum from the virgin’s cock, until Vivi was whining in blissful agony as she came down from the high of orgasm. Eventually, Vivi’s eyes rolled back  into her head and simply passed out, her mind overwhelmed past its limits by sheer pleasure.

Ziratha kept riding her all the same. The succubus didn’t stop until she’d milked her for every last drop.

Eventually, though, once her hunger was sated, she slumped down next to the punk girl, giggling intermittently in giddy, light-headed glee. The succubus’s head was already filling with daydreams of fame and wealth when Vivi came to and pulled her into a hesitant, needy embrace.

“Hey, u-um,” Vivi whispered earnestly, in a voice that was anything but punk. “W-was it good for you too?”

“Huh?” Ziratha roused herself. There was something strange about the way Vivi sounded. No; about the way she felt. Ziratha had expected her to start returning to something closer to her normal behavior.

“I-I-I just, uh…” Vivi was once again turning bright red. “I-I thought it was really special. You know? Like, um, maybe we really have a connection.”

Ziratha seized Vivi’s hand again and, as Vivi stared at her hopefully, paid close attention to what she could sense from the punk girl. When the penny dropped, she started cackling.

“Oh my god!” she howled. “I can’t believe it. You’re still the same way. As fresh as ever.”

“What do you mean?” Vivi sounded defensive.

“I’m definitely going to need to hold you for some… oversight observation. Just to make sure.” Ziratha licked her lips suggestively. “But I can already tell. It’s like your brain can’t adapt anymore. Not just your energy levels. Your social skills. Your inhibitions. Your stamina. Everything.”

“What?” Vivi pressed anxiously.

“It’s the revirginization,” Ziratha pronounced. “All of it. It’s permanent.”

***

Mere weeks later, it was a very different Ziratha that stood upon the stage to make her big pitch to a room packed full of succubus leaders and investors. It wasn’t just the confidence - although she had that in spades, now that her Nobel prize was apparently all but assured. Her body had changed too. She stood taller. Grander. She exuded power and presence, and all of her body’s assets had gone from merely ‘hot’ to inhumanly mouth-watering. Her horns were a massive, knotted crown upon her head, and her tail was as deft as a whip and as thick as an anaconda.

All thanks to her favorite little meal.

Vivi was standing a little way behind her on the stage, and while physically she was unchanged, she seemed to have shrunk just as Ziratha had grown. She exuded a fragile, nebbish submissiveness despite all tattoos and piercings. She wore a choker collar bearing Ziratha’s name around her neck, and she was wearing a dress.

Ziratha liked her that way. And Vivi was no longer able to argue with the succubus.

“So, as you can see from our data, our early clinical trials have borne out the most promising of my invention’s results,” Ziratha was saying, as she rounded off her speech. “The regression to maiden status is, both psychologically and metaphysically speaking, permanent. The process isn’t damaging, but the subject’s mind naturally sheds its ability to develop new sexual skills or comfort zones, physical or social. Accordingly, their energy levels remain at peak capacity and potency - forever.”

Ziratha paused for a beat, letting the crowd of succubi sitting in front of her drink that in.

“In short,” she concluded, “they’re helpless perma-virgins. Isn’t that right, Vivi?”

Vivi blushed an incredibly deep red and looked down at the floor, but nodded.

“So!” Ziratha clapped her hands. “It’s safe to say that we’re ready to move into pre-production. Soon enough, each and every one of you could have one of my devices in your very own hands - assuming you’re willing to provide me with funding, of course. What do you say, ladies? A future of infinite, renewable energy awaits us!”

As expected, the auditorium was immediately filled with thunderous applause.

The age of the Succubus Energy Crisis was over.

The age of perma-virgin mortals and succubus dominance was about to begin.

---

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[glowinggator]

Yellow Diamonds

In which Leonardo really wants to help you do your weekly HRT.

Warnings for needles, but that's about it! Trans, gender-neutral reader!

Thick as honey, and just as sweet — perhaps not so much in taste, but in the feeling of it as the pale oil seeps into your body. The magic of becoming, of creation, all stored in a little glass bottle — and now, stored in you. It’s strange, how just a few drops of this suspension has given you the reigns back to your life. Given you back your mind, turned your body into something that isn’t just inhabited, but loved. It’s divine, it’s—

“So, when are you gonna let me take a stab at it?”

Leonardo sits on the floor, leaning against the rim of the bathtub with his legs crossed. You shoot your lover a look at his sudden interjection, although he doesn’t meet your gaze — instead, he remains lazer-focused on the small needle in your thigh as you slowly inject the liquid. He’s been by your side since day one, cracking jokes for the first few months to help with the adrenaline of putting a sharp object in your body, before settling into a habit of quiet, yet eager observation as your fear subsided into a calm routine. The novelty of your weekly injections wore off within a few months, sure, but the excitement never did — perhaps that’s why he still insists on sitting with you while you do your shot. But this? This is new. You roll the words around in your head for a moment, and despite the strangeness of the statement, he seems completely serious. It takes a lot not to laugh at the absurdity of the statement, but it sparks a wave of amusement nonetheless.

“And by it, you mean me, I assume?” You grin, “Should I be worried?”

This coaxes a laugh out of him, and his eyes bounce up to meet your own for a split second in mirth before returning back to your exposed thigh. “Come on,” he draws out, “Isn’t it romantic?”

“You think stabbing me with a needle is romantic? Maybe I should be worried.”

“You know, there’s plenty of people ready to disagree with you on that, for many a reason. If anything, I think my take on it is the most normal of them. Unless you want me to be a mad scientist, in which case, I think you might be color blind. And hearing blind. Deaf, that’s the word-” He rambles, finally meeting your eyes in full. It’s only then that you pull the needle from your thigh, loosely capping it before cleaning and dressing the small wound. He’s halfway through another half-baked — although you must admit, charming one-liner — when you silence him with a quick kiss to the lips. Pretty blue eyes soften, and lips upturn in adoration, still enamored you all these years later.

“You want to help?” You ask.

He nods, and at that, you take his hand in yours, placing it gently on your thigh before applying the faintest of pressure to his larger digits. He takes the hint, pressing against the spot where you had just withdrawn from, working the oil into the surrounding tissues. I love you, his movements say, I’m happy I get to be here with you for this. You drag your nails fondly across the top of his shell, and it’s sweet, and tender, and it almost makes you feel bad for wanting to ruin the sanctity of it…

“You’ve got another thing coming if you think I’m gonna let you stab me with those big ass hands of yours—”

“You know what? I take it back, you should be worried,” he laughs, launching up off of his position on the floor to wrap you in his arms. Strong arms wrap around you to pull you to your feet, then up in the air against your will, coaxing a shriek from your lips when he drags you away from your array of wrappers — and you feel at home. In your body, in his arms, in your house below the city streets — everything is as its meant to be.

[antiendovents]

// vent, medical ableism

tldr; my fucking DOCTOR is pro-endo and her source is a dumbass paper that proves nothing and now my healthcare is at risk!!

just had my appointment with my gender wellness doctor. she asked how i've been and i mentioned finding a 2nd therapist for specific stuff. she asked what and i said dissociative disorders. i wanted to be vague but she pressed me to talk about it and reluctantly i talked about having alters and answered her questions bc i struggle with saying no.

i told her i was ok with doing an adverse childhood experiences scale but that i had stuff i wanted to talk about (like my hrt not being at the pharmacy for months) she said "we'll get to it".

after the assessment she asked abt it causing distress and she was talking about how in the office they use the term "plural identities" i said that was fine but that its still a disorder. she was like "disorder is negative" and compared it to how it used to be called gender identity disorder (comparing the two as if she has any place to talk on it, being cis and a singlet) but its better to use "plural identities"

i was like "thats fine as long as its still seen as a disorder and caused by trauma" and she was like "no its not always caused by trauma" and i straight up said "do you have a source for that?" and she was like "google my husbands name" and i did and THEN she moved on to my actual issues with struggling to get hrt for months.

the whole time after i had to mask how i was feeling so i could get basic healthcare. after she hung up i burst into tears. its been like 10 min and im still crying and feel sick. ive had doctors say they dont know what DID/OSDD-1 is before. ive had them say DID is a personality disorder. ive never had anything like this before and i feel unsafe. the fucking endo community IS affecting healthcare. i dont feel like i can ever talk to a doctor about this stuff again. she completely talked over me and then moved on like it was nothing

btw this is the stupid study her husband worked on. read it and its not even PROVING ANY OF WHAT SHE SAID. its just "oh well some people THINK theyre plural and of course disordered people have to be miserable so if you like ur alters they must be magically there!" and was from the plural association. its fucking disgusting this is being used as fact when theres nothing but subjective opinion.

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S246874992300042X

i genuinely think im going to go to planned parenthood from now on. i cant work with her anymore. its been 2? maybe more years of working with her but im done. im sorry to ramble so much. im still having a breakdown over this.

-arachnid anon

im really sorry about that arachnid anon. That sucks and if you can we hope you manage to get a new doctor because she is clearly causing you distress. This really sucks, I feel like endos don't always realise how dangerous this stuff can be for actual systems. If doctors don't see it as a disorder then they won't treat it as such, meaning you won't get the help you need and you won't feel safe with her (as you said), which like,, isn't good. She's not a specialist meaning if anything she shouldn't really be saying stuff about DID/OSDD at all, because that's not her job or her place ((I understand you brought it up, but still. She should keep her opinions out of her damn job))

[gayhenrycreel]

amatonormativity can only be defeated if society learns that people can have different needs.

most people need sex. i need sex to stay mentally healthy, but not everyone is the same. i also need gluten, but some people get really sick from it. a lot of people need romantic love for emotional fulfillment, which i will never understand and find very strange, but thats okay, because people are different.

ableism is also tied into this. i need things to be explained very clearly, often multiple times, otherwise i dont understand. sometimes im literally unable to process sound enough to understand what people are saying. most people dont need basic sentences explained multiple times to understand, so i have a need that others dont have.

a lot of amatonormativity is similar to ableism. i theorize this is because society views both lack of attraction and disability as biological inferiorities that need "curing". this is why historical queerphobia is extremely ableist. electro conversion therapy is exactly the same thing one of my dead relatives suffered for being mentally ill (note that this form of... well, torture, literally cooks brain cells, eventually having similar effects as a lobotomy).

intersex people are often forced on hrt that makes them sick, because perisex society believes that "normalcy" is what people need.

ive heard of asexuals being forced on libido meds because asexuality is assumed to be a medical condition.

all of these are forms of conversion therapy (if your country has not banned igm, conversion therapy is still legal, sorry).

again with the inherent ableism, i used to have problems with anxiety induced meltdowns, and my psychiatrist assumed it was because of my already treated adhd. he forced me on ritalin, which i already had a record of it not working for me. my adhd meds that work were taken from me and i had to take whats basically mild meth. for 3 days straight, i had a panic attack. singular. it continued for days without stopping. as soon as this started happening my mum took me off ritaln, against that doctors orders. for a week i had no adhd meds, so i microdosed magic mushrooms and my anxiety (and adhd) caused no problems for that whole week.

all of these are medical assumptions, assumptions that a non existent problem needs curing. my adhd was fine. i was treated with a med that had worked since i was 5.

theres a huge similarity between gay men being forced on testosterone to try to make them more masculine, and me being forced on ritalin to treat a medical issue that didn't exist in an attempt to make me normal. (the problem i had was much more about my autism not being accommodated btw).

queerphobia and ableism have been intertwined since western society came up with eugenics.

i dont need to be fixed, i need to be loved instead of treated like a problem. people always think my autism is "worse" when they abuse me, and its just because i cant mask when im scared. it becomes a cycle of me being abused for not masking, and not masking because im scared. in the same way, things like psychosis are made infinitely worse by psych wards. can you imagine having a delusion that the government is hunting you and then actual cops throw you in a cell and drug you? thats reality for many psychotics! it happened to me, and everytime i became more convinced that i was being tracked.

queerness is treated how disabilities are treated, because to the medical system they are the same: disorders, and disorders are inferior.

in both cases people just need to be cared for. we may be totally different, but we have so many similarities in our experiences.

a society that sees us as the same will treat us the same.

[byuntrash101]

Fairy dust

reader x dom!baekhyun

smut | nsfw | mdni

soft dom!baek, soulmate!au, fantasy!au, marking, praising, handjob, nipple play, pet name (baby, angel), outdoor (whimsical forest), unprotected sex, cum inside, size kink (a lil bit), reader is petite i mean she's a fairy so it checks out, brief cockwarming, wholesome, you guys just love each other and you're so cute

requested | part of my 2023 prompts event

As a fairy you are about to commit the unthinkable, show your true self to a human. But Baekhyun is different. You only have to trust the Spirit of the Forest guiding you to him.

[❛ what if i hurt you? ❜ + ❛ you won’t hurt me. ❜]

TUMBLR IS BASED ON REBLOGS. PLEASE REBLOG MY WORK 🖤

a/n: welcome home baby <3

As a fairy you are about to commit the unthinkable, show your true self to a human. But Baekhyun is different. You only have to trust the Spirit of the Forest guiding you to him.

idea : fairy reader, human!baekhyun reader is petite and frail and baekhyun is scare to hrt her. soft dom.

You took a deep sigh as you tried to relax, feeling your heart beat flush against your ribs. But how could you? What you were about to do was crazy, completely crazy. 

Baekhyun was a human. 

Not ever in the history of your village has a human saw a fairy’s true form. Humans were vile, they were destroyers, they could not be trusted under any circumstances.

And yet you trusted him.

Baekhyun was much different from the other humans you had ever seen. You found him for the first time trying to get close to a wounded fox. At first you wrongly assumed he was toying with the poor animal. Somehow drawing joy out of the creature’s suffering.

Your first instinct was to flee but as a fairy you were the prime guardian of the forest so the little speck of light that you were, hid behind a thick tree trunk. Waiting for the bad man to finally grow tired of the helpless cries of the small fox to come to its rescue. With a touch of fairy dust its injured leg would be good as new.

But after a while you noticed how Baekhyun was actually trying to sooth the animal. Gently stroking its fiery fur with the back of his delicate hands, speaking in a quiet reassuring tone. Even if he thought there was not much he could do except be there for the poor little thing until its time had come.

You were absolutely astonished by this scene. It was the first time you saw a human venture this deep into your woods without being armed with one of these fire tubes that shoot metal balls. Baekhyun was kind hearted, patient. Just good.

At the same time you needed to act fast. The fox was bleeding out of its leg. And granted Baekhyun couldn’t do much apart from waiting with the poor animal. You, on the other hand, had the power to change the outcome of the creature's fate… So without a second thought and before it was too late you lept out of your hiding spot, flapping your wings as fast as you could. Getting just close enough swiftly blow some healing fairy dust into the creature's open wound and treat it. You flew away as fast as you came in, not even taking the time to watch the bloody wound close itself back helped by your magic. You wanted one thing: run to your village and be out of danger.

Baekhyun on the other hand didn’t miss the mysterious ball of light coming close to vanish the next second, frantically flickering away. Without hesitation he ran after it. He chased it, voice pleading to the light to halt. He ran as fast as he could but the light easily distanced him. Effortlessly wavering between the branches while Baekhyun was struggling to shimmy between the imposing centennial trees, his feet tripping  over their thick roots and slipping on the malleable and wet ground.

Before he could realize the light fluttered away and you were out of sight leaving his broken pleads behind you. 

But Baekhyun came back the next day and the day after that one and the day after that one. Days turned into weeks, into months but he never stopped coming to the sacred glade. He waited for you everyday until dusk. He knew he wasn't crazy, he knew you were real. Even when you stayed hidden somehow he felt your presence and talked to you hours on end never hearing your voice talking back to him. But he never let go of this hope.

One day you dared the unthinkable. You answered him. You spoke to him. Baekhyun had no words to express the happiness he felt. As time went by you grew close to one another. You spoke everyday and sometimes you didn’t even say anything Baekhyun was just content getting to stare at the comforting light. 

And this unexpected encounter blossomed into a friendship which, in time, also blossomed into something else…

“Hi y/n” his voice chirped from behind you. You jumped. And Baekhyun laughed. This clear laugh that you came to know and love. 

You flew all around his face scolding him not to creep up on you like this. Baekhyun flowed with his creased and amused eyes the frantic light around him. You were so cute he just couldn’t help it.

He held his palm flat in the air and you landed on it. The warm feeling of his hand brought comfort to your heart, briefly allowing yourself to think about something else than what you had in mind all day.

Baekhyun asked about your day, and talked about his. His chestnut brown hair shining under the delicate rays of the sun. But somehow there was an ounce of melancholy in his fading smile.

“Sometimes I wish I could be like you” he sighed, eyes hanging between nothingness.

“What do you mean?” you asked, tilting your head to the side, even though he couldn’t distinguish that.

“Just live here in the forest, far away from the world, far from the cold. Be a small ball of light like you” Baekhyun looked back at you with a sad half smile. 

“You know… I’m not a ball of light that is only the form I take to navigate and guard the forest. I'm not really this small.” you didn’t expect Baekhyun to look at you with such shock, he opened his mouth to speak but was immediately interrupted by an intense cough. While he was choking on air he brought his hands to his chest and you were forced to leave your comfortable seat on his palm. 

“What?” he started in a strangled voice “how come you never told me?”

“I don’t know I guess it never came up”

“So that means your village isn’t a bunch of cute miniature houses in a hollow tree hidden somewhere in the forest?” 

“Well… in a sense it is hidden in the forest, yes. But no it isn’t miniature” you chuckled. Which even if he couldn’t see he picked up on. And he started laughing along with you, this was healing you. Healing him. This felt natural. Like the Great Spirit of the Forest themselves put him in your path that faithfull day.

Silence fell between you. After a moment of hesitation you started again.

“Aren’t you going to ask?” you turned your face to him, even if he couldn’t see he still felt your nervous tone.

“Ask what?” he replied, closing his eyes peacefully as a ray of light was piercing through the canopy. 

“What I look like” 

“No” he answered without opening his eyes. “That’s not something I should ask. Maybe it's against your rules to show yourself, maybe you can’t outside the village, maybe you’re uncomfortable with it, and other reasons I can't name.”

Your eyes started to prickle with tears at his response. You could have never imagined a human being this respectful to another creature. But Baekhyun was like this, respectful, caring. He had so much love in his heart for Life. From the thick and ancient trees, to the ladybug navigating its ribbed bark, to the delicate flower blooming at its roots. Baekhyun had love for Nature.

“Besides, if you wanted to, you would have shown me” he added.

And you wanted to. This was right. You knew that in your heart. Now you just needed to trust the Spirit of the Forest guiding you.

Without another word you lifted yourself, opening your wings. Baekhyun whipped his head to your direction when he saw the little ball of light grow. You radiated a familiar warmth that soothed the atmosphere like a warm open foyer in the middle of december. The light grew bigger and brighter until someone he never saw but knew emerged from it. 

Your bare feet gently landed on the mossy floor as your iridescent purple dragonfly wings gently flapped behind you. Baekhyun was in aw, jaw hanging loose as he eyes you in disbelief. You were cladded in bright healthy green leaves that hugged your frame tightly and long flower petals formed a skirt on your hips. Your beautiful healthy hair cascading onto your bare shoulder and your mysterious and enticing purple eyes bashfully looking back at him. If Baekhyun was to die right now he would do so while being the happiest he ever was.

Just looking at you filled him with plenitude. He felt like he had ascended to heaven. Like he was looking right at the face of an angel gracing him with a coy smile.

“Y/n” he whispered. He opened his mouth to speak but you panicked. If he spoke you would know for sure what he thought of you, the real you and you didn’t want to know. You wanted to enjoy the uncertainty a little longer.

So you kissed him. Prompting yourself up your tippy toes to link his lips with yours, your small hand gently laying on his big chest. At first he tensed up, but then you felt him relax into you, his hands gently wrapped around your waist to bring you closer to his body. When you parted your heart was hammering against your rib and beating in your eardrums, instantly missing his warmth on your lips.

“You are stunning y/n” Baekhyun whispered with a fond smile while gently stroking your back.

“Thank you” you returned the smile. “You don't look bad either”

But you wanted more of him. You kissed him again but this time deeper. Your hands held him tighter and you pressed your small body against his big one, linking your hips. You licked at his lips wanting to taste him and he let you. You moaned into his mouth when his hands instinctively went south, floating on the small of your back going down even further.

When you parted from him and took a step back Baekhyun looked at you puzzled and confused.

“Baekhyun…” you started hesitantly. “I came here today for a very specific reason.” You started while he listened carefully. “I came here to be linked with you…”

“Of c-” but you cut him.

“If you say yes… your life will change forever. You’ll be stripped of your humanity and you’ll become a fairy like me.” Your heart was pounding in your throat, threatening to jump out your mouth at any time.

Baekhyun took both your petite hands in his big warm ones, gently wrapping them with care. When you lifted your eyes back to him his face was beaming, tears brimming at his eyes.

“There’s nothing I desire more than to be with you and be part of your world” he whispered in one single breath. It felt like the weight of the world was lifted off your shoulders.

“I love you y/n”

“I love you too” you replied simply returning his radiant smile as both your hearts sang in unison, binded by love long before this moment consecrated it.

“Now for the passing ritual…” you said, blushing at the idea of what was to come. You lightly tapped on three specific parts of your organic dress and slowly the leaves wrapping rounded your bust and the petals around your hips opened up. Baekhyun was in admiration, to him it was like seeing the most beautiful of flowers blooming after a long winter, piercing through the melting snow to let its beauty shine under the still timid sun. You were magnificent. 

Baekhyun drank in your most natural form, mouth agape as he had trouble wrapping his mind around what his eyes were perceiving. You were the most stunning being he ever laid eyes on, that he was already certain of but to see you completely undress for him, ready for him. Him only... It rocked his world beyond recognition.

You were a little shameful at the idea of exposing yourself but you didn’t cover, you wanted him to see you. With a flick of your wrist Baekhyun’s clothes evaporated into purple dust. And finally you could see him too.

Your eyes trailed down from his long slender neck to his collarbones to his toned abs and to his lower stomach. 

You unconsciously pressed your thighs together when you noticed how worked up Baekhyun had gotten. He was fully hard, his length sitting mighty and in charge right there for you to see just painfully waiting for more.

You took his wrists in between your fingers and placed his hand onto your waist while Baekhyun was petrified, only in his wildest dream he ever saw you like this. You leaned on to him, his big frame completely enveloping you.

“I want you Baekhyun” you whispered in his ear.

Right there something in Baekhyun snapped. He immediately latched his hot lips into the thin skin of your neck, sucking on it eagerly, leaving beautiful blue marks on the places he visited. He traveled down your chest until reaching one of your breasts. He played with your nipple in his mouth, hungrily sucking at it, flicking his tongue around it until it hardened.

You sighed and faintly moaned at his touch, cheeks becoming redder as his teasing went on then you felt his hand wrap around your wrist guiding your hand to his hot and hard member.

“Touch me” he ordered in a tone that was brand new to you. You never heard him go so low and be so demanding, his raw voice awakened something in you.

Your hands firmly gripped his base and when you pulled on his length and pushed back he growled in your ear, sending swarms of butterflies in your stomach.

“You’re so good” he sighed as you picked up the pace. “Keep going” he ordered again with the sultry voice that was making your mind blank.

You kept going until he stopped you. Eyes half lidded, breath short and sweat pearling on his forehead.

“I need you right now” he said before taking you in his arms and lifting you like you didn’t weigh anything, laying you onto a boulder, upholstered with soft, cushiony moss.

He gathered your wetness at your entrance and you whined when you left his tip rubbing you in all the right places. But then he stopped. You looked back at him to find doubt swimming in his warm brown orbs.

“What if I hurt you?”

“You won’t hurt me.” you assured. “Please Baekhyun” you said in one short breath. Even if he wanted to, he could never say no to you.

And hurt you he did not. Quite the opposite. As he pushed himself inside you, you felt the delicious stretch of your walls to accommodate him. The way he was perfectly filling you up felt divine and you couldn't help but to let a moan roll off your lips and into the deserted glade of the forest.

“Baby you feel so good around me like this” Baekhyun said in a guttural groan, trying his hardest not to burst at the heavenly tightness. He leaned his broad shoulders over you to shower you with kisses. “Can I move now baby?”

“Yes” you replied promptly, your ankles unconsciously wrapped around Baekhyun and pushing him deeper into you. He smirked.

“You’re cute when you’re so eager for me like that” he chuckled but the grin quickly turned to another expression when he pulled his hips back, letting them snap back against yours, perfectly fitting each other.

“Yesss” you cried out as Baekhyun went faster in and out of you. “Please this is so good” you said, biting on your lower lip, forgetting about your surroundings only focusing on the tingling and hot pleasure Baekhyun was providing you.

“Baby you’re so good for me” Baekhyun whispered, hands gripping tighter around your waist, pushing deeper with every thrust. One of his hands left your side to go play with your drenched bundles of nerves. The burning pleasure made you arch your back further into the moss, hard nipples hitting the chilly open air.

“Please don’t stop” you begged as your tiny body rocked underneath him, your stunning breast moving at the same rhythm of Baekhyun’s hips rolling deep into you. Bliss was turning your mind completely blank, you couldn’t think of anything, you could only see him, hear him, feel him.

“I’m about to-” Baekhyun grunted, digging his long fingers into your side. Warm brown orbs deeply rooted into your purple ones.

“Please cum inside me” you asked, eyes full of need for him.

And he gladly obliged. He delivered thick ropes of cum deep inside of you right where you wanted and it was the last straw for you. You came under him, bundle of nerves violently twitching under his expert touch and walls aggressively gripping him trying to suck his essence as deep as possible. White pleasure taking over you, making your bare toes curl and your wings frantically flap behind you.

Your fairy dust completely enveloped the both of you as Baekhyun’s thrusts became sloppy, slowing down until he came to a stop.

Baekhyun didn't want to move, he stayed right there taking his arms around you leaning over to kiss you.

“You were amazing” he sighed. You hummed in response, still unable to think of whole sentences after descending from cloud nine.

You rubbed small soothing circles into his back when you noticed two small bumps under his skin. 

“Your wings” you faintly gasped. “They’re growing”

a/n: this was so wholesome. it's a little less heavy on the smut but it felt right. i really let my imagination run free with this one and i hope you liked it dont hesitate to tell me in my asks or comment. feedback is always appreciated. im so happy our sunshine is back from the military. welcome home baekhyunie <3

[robins-warudo]

Lamia HRT Prelude - Memories I

She collapsed.

I remember very little concretely of this time.  The only thing clear is that she collapsed.  Worked the field, stood up, legs gave out.  My wife screamed.  Overreacting, she thought at the moment.  My wife helped me.. No, her.. back up and brought her inside to rest.

My wife berated her, which the tall-man took as light-hearted at first, but slowly it descended into an argument.  For someone of her former standing, the elven valedictorian of our magic school, my wife had been talking of black magic a lot lately, but.. they trusted each other. 

After one rant and before the next tirade, the tall-man changes her tune and smiles.  She touches the tip of one of my wife’s ears, then trails that finger down until her palm can caress her cheek, then says her piece.  She knows her lover wouldn’t do any sort of black magic without say.  This was simply yet another conversation where the tall-man tries to assuage my wife’s fears of her growing old first, that it was natural, that it was a life well spent already and she looked forward to however much was left.  The latest such conversation of many.  Surely, nothing would-

I hack blood out of a throat that feels too wide, past teeth that feel too numerous and too sharp, shake copious amounts of it off of my arms, off my head, off my..  Something else.  Not legs.  I felt something else.

I opened my eyes. Despite having only torchlight, my vision was clearer than it had been in years, and my wife stood in front of me.  Much smaller than I remembered.  Sweating buckets and short of breath, telltale signs of using much magic, alongside her pupils changing back to normal from strange keyhole shapes.  I reach out to her and flinch before I make it.  The dark arms in my periphery weren’t merely bloodstained and dripping - black diamond scales lined the back of my hand, going all the way down my arm.  I see green band patterning - familiar, the tall-man’s memory says, her hometown’s local snakes having similar - and it’s her revulsion that drives me to look back at my wife instead of this body.

Black claws and green hands softly caress my wife’s face, my middle finger first reaching for the tip of her ear like always, though now I need not trace the ear for my palm to reach her cheek. The gesture calms her from an incoming panic, telling her that her love is still here, despite having just realized what awful act her fear has driven her into.  Words pass between us, but I recall few.  What I do know is this - this was the point of no return.  Even if we deluded ourselves into thinking we could still live civilian lives, as long as I stayed out of view.

The dungeon became our home.

And I remember the day we broke fon-

“Robin!” a familiar voice startles me out of our shared daydream.  I look out and see myself eating.  I go to look at my human hand but my eyes are not under my control - ah, right. I’m not fronting.  Clarity, my near-lifelong headmate, just spoke to me aloud in the silence of the car.

“Robin, I know your memories are a lot sometimes - especially as we make our way to this Hyper City to make your dream real - but you’re dominating the train of thought with it again. It’s not even the memory itself, it’s that you’re clearly wallowing in it feeling bad.”

‘R-Right,’ I stammer, assigning my voice an avatar in headspace - in my meekness, rather than my ideal body, I’m identical to our shared physical body, a round brown-haired mess of a trans girl, scratching the back of my head.  ‘Sorry, everyone.’

A murmur of “Alrights” and similar feelings, from awake and dormant headmates respectively, washes over me.  A soft breeze of rose petals rushes to my side and a pale hand touches my shoulder comfortingly.

‘You still wanna do this?’ its owner asks - a somewhat older Ruby Rose, one of my fictive headmates - second only to Clarity in making sure I’m comfortable pushing forward with this if I so desire.  ‘This always has been your choice.’

‘Yeah,’ I answer, both her and Clarity’s no doubt similar sentiments. ‘We wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t.  I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t questioning myself, though.’ I admit, shrinking back from Ruby’s touch sheepishly.

“Remember how scared you were of starting your social transition to womanhood?” Clarity follows up between final bites. “Or when you first realized you weren’t human?  Or how about when you finally realized you weren’t alone in this thick skull after years of me pounding on it?  All in that order?” she swallows.  “Point is, you’re still scared of change. And while that needs to be addressed, it’s worked well so far as a barometer of what is and isn’t real.  You’re on the right track, and you know it, and I know it.”

She projects an avatar into headspace to lean forward in front of me, the near-clone of the body my avatar imitates, but with further feminine features and much silkier, better cared-for hair.  “One last time.  You want this.” Practically spoken as a statement rather than a question, but I answer.

‘Yes!  I want to do this!’

“To do what?”

‘I want to be a lamia!  I want to be me!’

Clarity and her avatar smile, and the latter pats my head before it dissipates.  “Good girl.” A hug from Ruby follows, and she zooms back into her room upstairs in another cloud of petals before Clarity resumes the drive, and subsequently our playlist.  Voracity is next on shuffle, ironically, the song that makes me remember what came next.  Clarity goes to skip it, but I ask her not to.  

I think of what’s coming once we get to this magical city I’ve heard so much about, based on all the stories of others becoming their true nonhuman selves.  Despite the memories playing before me, I smile, and Clarity smiles with me.

I’ll face this head-on.  With everyone’s help.

Although as we approach and pass under the fabled archway, the familiar pit of hesitation forms in my stomach, thinking of those same memories.

If this is reality, if I can become capable of even a modicum of what I did then.. am I something worth becoming?