#holy shit its a long post

[toxooz]

girl help i made Ollies cheekbones too snatched

COMIC UPDATE WILL B DONE BY NEXT TUESDAY 4SURE 🐦💥

[hecatialapis-lazuli]

i feel like I've talked about this before but I wish blazblue dipped more into the horror of the situation. Whether you wanna go cosmic or existential both kind of work, though I guess the theme is a bit more despair than horror? Those two feel like they marry together pretty well.

Like. Think of CS. You have Noel, becoming what she always was, something inhuman. Literally screaming and crying after having the truth of the world and the PFDs revealed to her. You have Ragna, also learning the truth, and that he has tried so, so many times and failed every single time. You have Terumi, relishing in the hopelessness that should cause, yet being just as stuck as everyone else, and painfully aware that if he wants out of this hell, he has to claw his way out.

Idk, I just think there's a lot of stuff in blazblue that lends really well to horror. There's already themes about loss of autonomy, just play a little more into that, emphasize the helplessness before the Master Unit, and then the satisfaction of finally being free.

Hell, the Master Unit/Origin still is sympathetic in this interpretation. She's suffering, she's not doing anything out of malice, she just wants to be a person. Not even the Origin is immune to the horror of being a thing, strung up to watch and desperately try for another ending this time. This time, it'll work.

[starryluminary]

I finally made a list of all the noco kiss edits I want to make by the end of the (initial) first six season run. Excluding the one I'm missing from WT, I ended up with:

Three kisses for Revenge of the Island

TEN kisses for All Stars

And five for Pahkitew Island.

37 kisses in total. Ignoring Ridonculous and the reboot (which rip/a/xel alone has to be MINIMUM 5. So that'll be fun.) Why do I sign myself up for this

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i've gotten several asks as to how i'm doing after the update, and uh.

well refer to This Image for your answer-

[skyphloxx]

ok so um. here is a scenario ive had in the drafts for literally over a month and forgot to post. maybe with a second part idk?

i've been thinking way too damn much about clegan and johns dog coded ass and his feelings around body markings. like, hickeys and bites and bruises etc. bear with me this post got really long lmfao.

fuckin. ok. so in a scenario where john and gale are fucking on the side pretty early on after their arrival at thorpe abbots.

everyone knows bucky is a slut, right? bucky can show up with hickeys and bites and red marks and nobody will question it. he might get jeers or crooked grins, they’ll laugh and say he must’ve slept with every girl on base and half the women in london by now, but it’s expected.

buck, though? everyone knows buck’s got a girl. and maybe he wouldn’t be the first guy to say as much and then fold after months of being away from home. but everybody who knows him knows that buck cleven isn’t like that. and anyway, it would be a little odd considering how consistently he turns down any woman who makes a pass.

you see where i'm going here right.

gale can bite the fuck out of john and leave him with bruises purpling from his neck all the way down to his thighs. when they’re alone together it’s the only time he gets to loosen that iron grip he has on himself, be anything less than carefully composed and controlled. outside gale is the fearless leader, who will sometimes joke and rib but has no vices, no faults. with john he is a hungry, wanting thing, all hands and mouth and teeth.

bucky loves it at first. being desired so much kinda drives him wild, knowing that gale wants him so bad, that there’s so much heat simmering under that cool surface. but there’s also something about the act of leaving marks on him that feels like gale’s staking a claim. that bucky allowing himself to be bitten is showing allegiance, or acquiescence, or maybe ownership. something of gale is left there, written across his skin, even if nobody else knows it. the marks say that gale can do what he wants with john’s body, that john is his. he’s painted his name across john’s neck and chest.

bucky doesn’t object to this feeling. like, at all. on its own, that part is amazing. the problem is he can’t do it back to gale. buck is so paranoid about being found out, and the communal living of the barracks adds extra complications. and john understands his fears, of course he does, he knows damn well what happens to men who get blue tickets, and he’ll respect anything that’ll help buck feel safer about what they’ve been doing. he’s pretty sure he’d do anything to keep buck coming back, he needs him that badly.

he fucking hates that he has to be so careful. he wants nothing more than to give it right back to buck, to bite the same kind of lurid purple bruises across his skin. he thinks all too often of how buck would react, his shiver at the scrape of john's teeth on sensitive skin and the low breathy noises he'd make. hates that he can't have that. but mostly he hates how he can't stake any claim over gale he way he feels that gale has over him. if buck can do what he wants with john's body, if his bites mean that john is his, then the inverse must also be true: bucky can't do the same, and gale is not his. he has no claim to stake.

which makes sense, really. as far as claims go, someone's already beat him to gale. that's the whole reason the no-markings rule was established.*

it ends up serving as a little reminder to bucky: that the arrangement he and gale have worked out to keep each other sane during all this? it's temporary. when the war ends buck will be going back to build a home and share a bed with someone, and that someone won't be john. he can't forget that however much gale seems to want him in the moment, he's committed elsewhere. john is a way for him to distract himself from everything else going on around them. he thinks sometimes gale does it as much to distract john as himself. taking pity on him or something. he knows buck still loves marge more than anything. he uses her letters like a lifeline, sniffs her perfume off the paper like it might send him back to her if he works hard enough at it.

someone with a better sense of self-preservation than bucky might try to break it off, disengage, try to soften the blow when it inevitably comes, but.

the marks also remind him that he is gale's. has been. is. will be. for as long as gale will have him. bucky needs him in a way that he doesn't bother to deny to himself anymore. his chest feels heavy with it when they’re together. he knows they're on borrowed time, but that just means john's going to borrow as much of it as he can. avoiding leaving bruises or not using his teeth is nothing, really, he would do so much less (or so much more) if gale asked him, any number of humiliating, desperate things to keep gale wanting to touch him, fuck him. it's fucking pathetic, how much he needs that. john's own stupid hurt feelings are nothing, compared to how much he'd endure for it.

so of course he never brings this whole dilemma up to buck as something that bothers him. he would not dare risk throwing a wrench in their arrangement, which is perfectly functional as it is. they've made it this far via mostly unspoken agreements, mutual willingness to not talk about it more than they need to. john will not even entertain the possibility of breaking that or scaring gale off or somehow ruining what they have. he is already so well versed at suffering in silence, and really this trade off isn't bad. he used to fucking dream of this, the taste of gale's mouth or the feel of their skin pressed together. he can stand being reminded it's temporary. he can stand knowing he's pathetic.

(bucky is a lying liar to himself. he is full of resentment and frustration. he will pretend he's not full of resentment about this for as long as it's physically possible to. gale knows something is up with him but won't say anything too specific about it for the same reason john won't - they don't talk about it if they can avoid it. that's the whole point of unspoken agreements.)

*bucky has not considered that gale would be similarly paranoid even if he was not openly in a relationship and loyal to it (loyal in heavy air quotes lmfao) if not even worse, just because gale cleven is a high-strung freak underneath all the calm collected shit.

[salswisteria]

SPOILERS FOR MALEVOLENT 45

(malevolent bingo bonus as the end)

THIS WAS SUCH A CUTE EPISODE IM SCARED FOR 46 😭

The way Arthur and John are just commuting they're being sweet to each other, they're being nice, they're activity treating eachother with such care ITS SO WIRBKEBDLSBRE

The deep level of care you can hear in their voices as they talk to eachother with so much comfort. Opening up to eachother about themselves, while taking care to make sure that they don't hurt the other with some long dragged out misunderstanding like they used to do so often back in the day.

The level of progress that these two have made within themselves— as well as with eachother— is just so heartwarming to see. The fact that we now fully have confirmation that Arthur has absolutely wanted to kill himself because of what he did to Faroe, and Faroe's spirit being so darn happy that he doesn't feel that way anymore! Faroe has always been with him and she loves her papa just as much as Arthur loves her.

For John, one was that small moment where he said something about camp fires being so "human." to which he and Arthur respond with laugh and agreement. It's such a small but heartwarming moment where you can just hear the character development brimming out of John. I'm personally not able to put it into words but for those who get it, get it.

I'd love to keep expanding on this because even though this episode is so much more melancholy then how our usual malevolent episodes are like, it means so much for our main characters as a whole and as well as their relationship.

This episode shows us that John and Arthur are different now. Their relationship is different now. They are no longer the John and Arthur we knew for so long, and that's wonderful.

But I am unfortunately burnt out but still have work to do so I should save my energy TT

Now IF Harlan and the Patreons decide to ruin this for us— I will absolutely riot in more even kidding— BUT IN ALL HONESTLY....I don't think they will. BUT WHO KNOWS WITH THIS PODCAST ANYMORE.

(also I think the "M" guy was talking about Alexander the owl when he said "He's not what he seems.")

Malevolent bingo card after EP 45

Photo raw:

[hellyeahmfwitchcrafttime]

we;re so back

[qoldenskies]

i think a lot of people pretty openly acknowledge that leo is someone that self-aggrandizes and acts reckless in order to compensate for his insecurities, which is true and it's very clearly spelled out especially in the movie, but i don't really see people acknowledge the fact that donnie is the EXACT same way (outside of people who specifically like to write a lot of angst for him. leo is forever designated sadboy of the fandom). which is sad, because i think it's the most twin-like thing about them!!

it's a trait they share pretty openly. same flavor of daddy issues, although leo is always wanting to look down, to be the BEST at something, to be admired and respected and trusted, to be above other people, while donnie is always wanting to look up, the whole approval from a parental aged adult thing is the largest example but i also think about his desperation for CAMARADERIE in the purple jacket, and also like, lol the entirety of mind meld. he wants to be understood and acknowledged and praised and he practically begs for it with everything he does.

both of them desperately want to impress! but i kind of interpret it as leo trying to make a point to himself more than to other people, because he is so caught up in his own self-judgement. it's why he can act rude or try to step over the others (raph especially, although early on there is some mutual toxicity in that relationship) in order to prove that point.

but donnie has a lot more self-security because he knows what he does! he knows he's good at it, i don't think there's any denying that. but under real praise he gets starry-eyed or he softens. he makes a big point out of presenting new things because that's what he's looking for. and i think that makes him so averse to the potential of failure. it's why he'll shrug it off or outright deny it when its brought up to him. he sucks so bad at taking responsibility lmao.

i think mind meld in particular is a very telling episode, especially the beginning of it. he gets rash and upset when he feels like he's doing too much on his own. he feels ignored and disrespected for his efforts, and makes bad decisions as a result. and between that and donnie's gifts it's very very obvious he is projecting the fact that he equates his usefulness, his role, to his self-worth as a person. a lot of that crowing confidence is not real. he is MAJORLY overcompensating just like leo is. (and i would also like to point out the kind of things he makes shelldon RESPOND to in smart lair before he's reprogrammed, like leo's ribbing)

idk, i just feel like donnie wants to be seen and leo wants to be able to see himself, although there is some overlap there and the two problems can bleed into each other.

(and i do think a big point of leo's arc in the movie is for him to genuinely stop being selfish. his insecurity gets in the way and he's thinking about himself when he acts, and that's what hurts people. all of them have the potential to be self-centered, but leo's behavior was putting people in danger, and he had to look past all of that because he has ALWAYS been a strong and capable person and a good leader, but he was afraid of it because he was setting the goalpost for himself too high, and it was RAPH'S thing. it all felt too daunting. he's never going to feel ready if he only thinks about himself. at a point it's just not about him. as dubious as his sacrifice at the end was, that was the point. get him some therapy for that blunder though)

and i think it has a lot of potential to make them clash in a really interesting way. donnie's like,,, got his THING!! leo is not CONFIDENT in his thing!! and he can't ever be better than donnie at his particular thing, so he LEAPS onto any chance to get one over on him, which clashes very badly with donnie's issues of easily feeling dejected or unappreciated. he's going to take that personally, and then leo is going to take donnie's bad interpretation of that behavior personally, because like... why doesn't donnie trust him? :((

anyways they are majorly twinning they are both dramatic unconfident bitches with self-worth issues and they both get louder and meaner when they feel hurt about something. its why i keep accidentally writing angst of the other when i try to write angst of one. ahaha lol oops

sorry ive had this blog for only a few hours i just needed to get my thoughts down mostly for myself. for writing purposes

[deoidesign]

HI I think I sent an ask a while back about having recently found TaTA and a) if it came off as trying to rush/guilt you. I am so sorry because that was NOT my intent, and b) I can hugely guarantee you have at least one person who will eat up any return, no matter when it happens, because I care about the guys so much 🥺 really looking forward to whatever comes next!!

Oh, I appreciate this a lot thank you!

Tbh it's a stress I would have regardless of anyone asking me about it, I'm probably the biggest one rushing and guilting myself on it. Which might contribute to some of the burnout I had...

My complaints are more about people who are demanding "more content daddy" or asking me if I'm dead or asking on every single post I make where it is... Wondering when it's coming back is completely reasonable, it's been a long time! but there's definitely a line haha

my editor also keeps randomly scheduling me and then saying "oh, btw you're scheduled to return in 3 weeks. Is that alright?" And I have to keep saying no, that's not alright??? And then dealing with that process...

I could write an essay about all the reasons it's not back yet, but that doesn't help me feel any less pressured, and it doesn't help you all get the rest of the comic any faster...

As of right now I'm scheduled to and trying to return october 21. No official announcement yet cause I have to do a lot of work in that time, but it's my official goal at least. When we get closer I'll be able to say for sure whether it's coming back on that date!

[fishyizm]

getting nuis and nesos from japan

from a guy that looks at listings as a hobby and owns a few nuis

--

this post is mostly about project sekai since i see alot about how people don't really know much about merch from japan and looking at this stuff is kinda my hobby lol

getting stuff from japan is pretty good since its wayy cheaper, especially right now since yen to usd is really low rn (unsure about other countries currency sorry) usually prsk stuff is scalped to the point where its better to get it from japan even with the proxy fee lmao (the price for wanting merch for something popular)

getting merch from japan is actually really easy through proxy services, which will order things for you in japan and then ship them to you in the country you reside. i use mercari (a secondhand market) through buyee but there are other proxy services too, you should probably do some digging to find out which ones best for shipping to your country and area. i like buyee but it only takes foreign paypals so that can be a downside

if you want to find merch for a specific character i reccomend looking up how the chracters name is spelled in kanji/however its spelled in game (the spellings are usually on the wiki in the character info panel, you can also get them in game but its easier to copy paste) you can look it up in english but you might get prices aimed at american audiences and machine translation is famously terrible with names. if youre looking for merch from a less popular thing then you can look up the thing's name but thingsll usually be listed under character names

once you have the name you can put ぬい (nui, plush) or ねそべり(nesoberi, those laying down ones.) there are probably other kinds but these are the ones i look into lol

if you want fast results you can go to the recommended tab in the top right but if you have the time i reccomend sorting by lowest price and digging through untill you find what you want, whichll probably give you the best price

for project sekai specifically if you want cheap plushes be a fan of leoni, momojan, or anhane lol popular character merch is anywhere from 1.5x to 3x more expensive than unpopular characters. even so itll be less expensive than english ebay lol. under the cut i have the usual pricing ive seen for prsk plushes but it all depends since mercari is basically japanese ebay, so this is only for old merch and crane game prizes. if you want more recent merch im sure theres people who buy lots and resell, i dont have any reccomendations for project sekai but i know @/enstarsgoods on twitter does this for enstars

(rant i did on this post's tags about nui pricing) [the chibi eye nuis r anywhere from 600¥ ($4) to 2000¥ ($14) depending on if its a guy/niigo or not (lmao) and nesos get up to 7000¥ ($45) (for guys) (i saw some of the girl ones listed around 4000¥ [$26]) and nesos arent listed (as) often. idk anything about the dot eye nuis and nuigarumis since i dont like how they look (lol)

keep in mind that these r resales so theyre a bit more expensive than if u just ordered one when they were in stock like nesos r originally only ¥2750 ($18) but r scalped to hell especially on english ebay]

on top of the price for the goods youll buy you also have to pay japan shipping (usually this is included but sometimes it isnt, it is on every listing if this is the case or not as well as the price) as well as a conversion fee per item which isnt much (i got away with 900¥ ($6) in total for 5 items) and shipping from japan to your country (for me it was ¥2300 [15] but i live in a very easy place to ship to so it may cost more for you) this is about the same as ebay shipping cost wise (for me at least)

--

i dont really know what people do with their project sekai nuis (except blend?? burn?? milk copypasta irl..) but with enstars people usually put cute clips in their hair and blush them which is super cute. people also make nui costumes that you can buy. you can search ぬい服 (nui clothes) and usually put the type of nui you have's origin/size (since they can be different demensions) people don't make them for project sekai nuis but im sure there are outfits available in that size/patterns around somewhere

[evalulu]

Jean/Scott/Warren!

There was never a dull moment in the lives of the X-Men.  Even though Warren wasn’t part of the active team anymore, he was one of the first five - Xavier’s first students and the first X-Men that existed.  It was hard not to feel like part of the X-Men still, to not consider himself part of the team, especially when he was frequently called on to help, whether that was with the X-Corp business, defending Krakoa, or just generally being a hero overall.  He really wasn’t supposed to be an active fighter, but it was what he was trained to do since being a teenager.  And besides, there was still an almost unbelievable amount of danger in the business world, cutthroat didn’t even do it justice.  He really enjoyed the simpler moments of just doing good and not being questioned at every turn, or having to watch his back for any hint of betrayal.  

He was thankfully a tough guy, though, able to withstand a decent amount of punishment while being lightning fast in the air.  Maneuverability was his practiced strength, and he was sure he was the best at flying with all of his training.  But even with all of his prowess and a healing factor to back him up, he still got hurt.  While things rarely ever let him rest properly, he could push through it.  He had to when Scott had called, and needed the aerial superiority that Warren had.  He had to push aside singed and missing feathers, but at least transitioning his wings to the sleek metal regrew them in an instant.  And now, he could focus on taking care of strange monsters from another dimension, a rift opened as the result of playing with powers far outside of mortal comprehension.  

Traveling through a Krakoan gate and flying fast to the north Californian coast, it didn’t take Warren long to rendezvous, already seeing Scott and Firestar waiting.  The young Mutant was proving to be a skilled X-Man So far.  

“So, what are we looking at?”

Scott, arms crossed, lets out a soft hum.

“One moment.”  

Warren tilts his head, moreso just wondering what they were waiting on until Magik's characteristic stepping disc appeared.

“Now,” Scott starts, “Rictor and Magik will prioritize closing the rift.  Firestar and Angel, you'll keep them engaged and limit their destruction.  Jean has located them traveling north. Don't let them get any farther.  Firestar, are you alright with staying in telepathic contact?”  

Simple enough; And Firestar gives a nod of confirmation at Scott's question.  Warren knew she wasn't the fondest of telepaths, or at least of Emma Frost.  Which was probably a story for another day.  And besides, he was keen to take off and get into the action.  

“As always, be careful.  We don't have much solid information on what these creatures are capable of, but they've so far been largely difficult to spot via visual contact.” 

Another brief response of confirmation was all Scott was looking for, and Warren knew that.  He kept himself alert, trying to spot anything that just didn't seem right.  Firestar, to her credit, was using her powers to fly and as a sort of detection if anything was disrupting the air unseen to the eye.  And if he were anyone else, he would've missed it; the glimmer of light that just didn't look right.  

“Firestar, there!”  Warren directs, and the heated blast hits something full force that lets out a horrible shriek.  Whatever camouflage it had faded, revealing a creature similar to a manta ray albeit without a stinging tail.  It was like its skin reflected the light, and newfound burns disrupted it.  These things definitely couldn't stick around.  There were probably more of them too, but Warren wanted to be careful with his flechettes.  While a few blades hit their mark on the injured creature and quickly work to paralyze it, that’s when he gets a good look at the underside of the creature revealing a large maw of colossal razor sharp teeth and tucked claws shaped like scythes.  And finding out how deadly those were was not on his agenda.  

He caught sight of another creature, and darted for the more open ocean off the coastline.  Keep them distracted; that was the goal.  While their course had turned back towards the rift, probably sensitive to whatever work Rictor and Magik were doing, this was the time to really let loose and not let a single of these monsters do anything more.  He turned to climb skyward, a few flechettes making sure that he drew the monster’s attention.  But as he climbed, he could see the way light reflected off the creature and how quickly it gained on him.  Maybe he couldn’t outspeed it, but he could outmaneuver it.  He moves into a loop, seeing the monster speed past him and try to turn around to dive on him.  But it just takes one powerful beat of wings to send more flechettes towards the now extended claws, while enough hit their mark, the feeling of those sharp claws scratching against his wings were not at all pleasant and forced a grunt of pain from him as they managed to cut him.  

But he’d heal just fine, and now he sped back towards the coastline to get sights on more of them.  

“Scott, how’re things there?”  

“Fine,” He says back, but Warren could tell that something was up.  And it wasn’t that much of a surprise to hear Jean’s voice in his head, with her maintaining the telepathic connection.

“Hurry back, more of those creatures are trying to stop Rictor and Magik.”  

No time to waste now; Warren pushes to his maximum speed to get back as quickly as he can.  Classic Scott, having a plan already that wouldn’t call for backup.  But he was already on the way, and already able to see the familiar blasts hitting some of the monsters.  And he was handling it perfectly, though Warren could see a creature coming in for a dive bomb.  Easy enough to intercept, he figured, as he climbed higher and focused on the beast.  

“Scott, incoming!”  

He collided directly with the monster and turned to open it up to a direct blast from Scott.  It shrieks from the hit, and the claws fully extend to reveal the jagged teeth (for lack of a better term) on the inside of the limb.  It tries to grab hold of Warren’s wing, managing to tear a good chunk of the metal feathers to pieces.  He lets out a shout then, but he’s able to still recover and keep himself from crash landing.  

“Warren, are you okay?”  

Jean’s voice in his head was concerned, and he let out a breath to compose himself.  

“I’m fine, don’t worry.”  

He’d worry about it later, and besides - this was far from the worst he’s ever experienced.  He could still fly fine, and with Firestar reconvening back at the shoreline and helping with the monsters, it was a simple task to hold them off long enough for the rift to be closed.  The creatures went with it, vanishing with little more than a screech to signal their departure.  At least that was that, and Warren for once was glad to land.  

“You look a few pounds lighter, Angel,” Magik spoke up, and he couldn’t help rolling his eyes.  

“Veeery funny, Magik.  I’m fine.”  “You seem so, so I wasn’t asking that.  Time to head back home.”  

She opens a stepping disc once more, bringing them all back home to Krakoa.  Warren’s priority now was to find a spot where he could relax and worry about his wing.  Scott was sure to have to report to the Council how things went, and that would give Warren some free time.  Or at least, he was assuming, until he heard Jean’s voice in his mind again.  

“Warren, you’re hurt.”  

He knew that tone, that obvious worry when Warren’s first solution would be to isolate himself and handle it himself.  And he knew he really shouldn’t if he didn’t want one of the most powerful telepaths he knew to come looking.

“It’s not that bad, Jean, really.  The damage’ll heal when they transform back.”  

And that was true, they would.  It’d hurt like hell, but they’d be pristine white feathers again with hardly any indication that something happened.  He’d be exhausted, sure, but he didn’t have anywhere to be.  

“I know, but still.  You know we’ll worry.”  

He can’t help a soft laugh then.  She wouldn’t force him, he knew, but it was also painfully clear that she would much prefer if he spent his time resting in the Summers house on the blue side of the moon.  And while he adored the breeze he felt on Krakoa often while flying, the moon wasn’t so bad.  

“Alright, alright, I’m on my way.”  

He was definitely a bit amused.  He wasn’t that reckless young guy anymore, charging headlong into danger.  And he was tougher now, with a healing factor that helped him and his much stronger form that he had learned how to control.  But, in the same breath, it’d be nice to be able to relax with the people he had known the longest, and trusted wholeheartedly without hesitation.  It was an easy enough task to fly to the gate that would take him to the house, landing once he was right outside the gate and stepped through.  That was one thing that was always sort of interesting - suddenly being in a brand new place altogether.  But then again, all the times traveling through them at least made them feel more normal.  

The moment he was in the Summers home, he was aware of just how quiet it was.  The kids must be busy with something, Alex out somewhere, and Gabriel off to God knows where.  But he wasn’t going to worry about that at all, especially when he was keen to lay back and relax.  He sat down on the couch and let out a soft hum then, and it didn’t take long for Jean to meet him.  

“Warren, it’s always great to see you.”  

He gives a soft laugh then, waving to Jean as she steps around the couch.  “You too, always.  But I mean it, I’m fine!”  

Jean answers him by running a hand over the still metallic feathers, gentle and careful though it was very clear that she knew how to avoid being cut by the flechettes, and stopped right at the part where the feathers had been ripped off.  He took that memo clearly enough.  

“Okay, it will be fine.  Is this the part where you offer to keep me from feeling the pain of them shifting back?”  

“If you want, I’d like to help.”  

And he knew that Jean meant it wholeheartedly, but wouldn’t push it if that wasn’t something he was comfortable with.  He generally disliked anyone messing with his mind, but there were a select few he trusted.  So he lets out a soft breath, nodding.  “That’s fine, just dull it so it’s more bearable, maybe.”  

She nods at that, only dampening Warren’s ability to feel pain as he willed his wings to change form again.  Like this, it still hurt, and he could still feel the way the feathers rapidly regrew to fill in the empty space, but it wasn’t as bad as it once was; when his wings first became white feathers again.  He had to make sure to keep taking steady breaths, stay focused and composed.  Once they were back to their normal form, he leaned back against the cushions in relief. 

“Are you sure you feel okay, Warren?”

Jean asks, and he can't help a laugh.  

“Yeah, I feel alright, especially thanks to you.  I appreciate you, Jeannie.”  

 “That’s good to hear.”  Scott’s voice makes Warren jump, because hell, wasn’t giving a report on things more time consuming than that? “Sorry Warren,” Scott says as he comes around the back of the couch, standing off to the side.  “I just wanted to come and check on you myself.” Warren can’t help a laugh at that, shaking his head.  “I’m telling you both, I’m fine!  I’m not fragile!”  

But he knows why they worry so much, and it’s not as if it’s unwarranted.  With all the pain they’ve all had to endure over the years, it was natural to worry about each other.  Scott worried about others, sought to make sure they were okay and safe.  It was what the leader did, so his own tone wasn’t upset; it was more playful and lighthearted.  

“I know, but still.”  Was the unsurprising answer from Scott.  Even after all these years, some things didn’t change.  

“Is this going to lead into a question of staying to take some time off?”  He can’t help teasing, and while Scott shakes his head, Jean lets out a hum.  

“Not if you don’t want to,” Scott starts, but Jean picks up.  “But it’d be nice to have some time with you.”  And Warren understands that sentiment.  They would generally have plenty of time to enjoy the peace and quiet, if all things went well, but taking moments now while they fought to keep themselves safe day in and day out was always a warmly welcomed respite.  And if there was anything that Warren appreciated, it was a comfortable night in with his loved ones.  

“Alright, I’ll stick around.  You’re lucky I love you both.”  He jokes, and Jean gives him a warm smile and tousles his hair just a bit as she stands.  “Love you too, Warren.”  And she even goes as far as pressing a kiss to his forehead before she walks off.  That leaves Warren just a bit dumbfounded, because that was new.  And when Warren looked over to Scott, he was sure the stoic leader had an amused smile on his face.  There was definitely a whole conversation that those two had that he missed out on entirely.  

“What did you two say?”

Scott just hums.  “Nothing.  You heard us, didn’t you?”

Warren rolls his eyes dramatically at that.  “Alright, you cheeky weasel.  You know what I meant.”  

Scott laughs then, only moving to follow after Jean with a wave to Warren.  Some sort of movie night or otherwise relaxed time seemed in order, reminding him when things were much simpler and they were just heroes doing all they can.  And truthfully, it was a welcome familiarity -  and Warren was just fine with that.  

[aibouart]

admittedly, i am afraid to talk about this, but have wanted to for a long while. i don't see a lot of people discuss this kind of thing, but i decided to do so for the me who was struggling and didn't know. also i have no idea where i am going with this and it's very late for me rn so here's a whole ass ramble on vent art. and also a bit more on how it's impacting how i view my art, now. i am terribly sorry if it's not very cohesive, my thoughts on it aren't yet cohesive either WOOPS

i wanted to talk a bit about how vent art really impacted my mental health, and how the idea that art needs some kind of meaning to have meaning really has been weighing on me lately (i know this is a concept i am assigning to my work and is not actually the norm/standard expectation of others consuming art. but it IS a sentiment i have seen enough that does impact me).

i want to specify, obviously i am not saying vent art is bad.

nor that doing vent pieces, or vent blogs, will ultimately result in what i went through for a number of years. rather, that this did happen to me, and there is a near impossible chance i am a unique case in any experience i will ever have. if you do vent art and it helps you, that's good! im not judging anyone for anything here. if your experience does not match my own, that's what it's like to be human~. i am not invalidating anyone on purpose by sharing my own experience. sorry for the insane disclaimer but it will eat me alive if i go to sleep thinking "what if they think x cuz i didn't say y and think im a terrible person"

---

i used to do vent art frequently (you won't find much on here as it was uploaded to a personal at the time). anytime i felt down or had a line of dialogue in my head making me feel bad in a way, i would draw for it. but the way i had interacted with it was really unhealthy. it became a terrible feedback loop where i'd feel bad, draw how i felt bad, look at the art, and ruminate even more on how i felt bad, until it spiralled so out of control i would lose touch with reality and get lost entirely in feeling like garbage.

i would just get so lost in the cycle with vent art that it would make my mental space worse and worse, and i would use the vent art as a negative confirmation bias. the words that hurt me i wrote down and anytime i looked again, they would hurt me again. but i would keep looking, and i would keep drawing.

i have always used art as an outlet, but for some reason the way vent art impacted me was unhealthy. it wasn't a good outlet. and it took me years to cut ties with it. i relied on vent art for a long time, but it took a lot of introspection and thinking to realise it wasn't the release i thought it was. and it was hard to let go, too.

i haven't touched the blog in a few months, now. i haven't done much vent art at all since then and genuinely, i've been doing SOOO much better. i no longer ruminate nearly as much as i had done so, i no longer get caught in a feedback loop that lasts for days to weeks. i still feel like garbage like people tend to do, but i don't put myself in a cycle over it anymore. i have gone back to it a few times in moments of desperation, but what used to be every week/every few weeks is now once a month maybe. and not to the extent at all (i would oftentimes post ~20 images in one night, before).

but i keep thinking about how, while the way i had done vent art was bad for my mental health, i keep feeling that just because i do sparkly cute and happy drawings, now, or drawings with no real meaning, that my art has nothing beyond face value... i do like a lot of my vent art. i think their compositions, or hidden messages and meanings, or colour use, was interesting.

but it wasn't worth the price for me.

so i am a bit caught in an in-between, here. my favourite form of art is the expression of love-you liked something so much, you dedicated time to draw it. and yet i cannot ascribe that to my own work very often. i think that man i wish i could make art with some kind of deeper meaning, that speaks to people, that's more than just pretty colours or shiny shading or a character everyone likes, or a character i like. but i just... don't know if it's for me.

ultimately, i could develop a healthy relationship with expressing and exploring negative emotions or experiences through art, but... do i want to? do i have to? do i need to? is it not enough to just draw something because... i like it..?

of course, the answer is yes, draw what you want, draw how you want, it's your art. but i am still trying to come to terms with that idea. i dont want to be seen as some shallow artist who just draws what's cute and pretty because they can and it's all they can think of, but like what if that's just what i like to draw??

in the end, that alone is good enough, drawing because you like to, because it's fun, because you like the thing you're dedicating time to creating for. it's just hard to grapple with after discarding a type of art that i felt was the only way i drew "for real".

anyways i am sorry this is soooo fucking long, and for all the clarifications (IM STILL NOT SAYING VENT ART BAD AND EVERYONE WILL DO WHAT I DID!! Dx) and the fact i had no real point here (probably)

anyways i will continue to draw what i want because i like to, as i have always been.

[transtalesofdoom]

Name Change Episode IV: A New Law

So as of today, Germany's got a new law on the books! It'll take effect in November of this year. The so called "Selbstbestimmungsgesetz" (literally "self-determination law") will allow trans people to change their legal names and gender much, much more easily.

Here's a "quick" summary of my understanding:

There is a 3 month waiting period between your request for a name/gender change and the change actually taking effect. (As such, you may already file your request in August to have it kick in simultaneously with the new law.)

Requests must be accompanied by a statement that you understand what you are doing and what consequences this will have.

Kids have to be in agreement with their parents to file a request. If they disagree, a court will decide whether the request can be granted or not.

Adults cannot change their name and gender again for a year. Children are exempt from this waiting period.

If you revert to a previous gender, you must also revert to the names you had at this point. (ie, if I were to detransition, I would return to my birth name. I would not be allowed to choose a new female name.)

You may request new versions of all sorts of official documents to have them updated with your new name and gender, obviously at your own cost. The old versions will remain on file where applicable.

Being nonbinary does not exclude you from laws using gendered language (ie "no man or woman shall commit arson" would still apply if you are legally neither)

Revealing or uncovering a person's former gender without their permission is punishable by fine (although you can probably only take legal steps if this was done with intent to harm you).

If you are legally nonbinary, you may request a gendered passport under a few restrictions (This is necessary if you are travelling to countries where only binary identities are acknowledged and/or you might fear prosecution)

The law only covers the legal, bureaucratic aspect of a name and gender change. It does not settle any medical or social aspects. As such, there's quite a few... "shortcomings":

Trans people, or generally gender-nonconforming people, can be barred from gendered spaces at the owner's discretion. (They may or may not have legal options to fight back, but at that point the discrimination already happened)

There is no clear stance on sports. Both inclusion and exclusion seem allowed. (Again, that's not what the law is for, but codifying that exclusion may be allowed is still yucky.)

In case of crisis or war, changes will still be granted, but ignored in regard to the draft etc. Trans women requesting a change during or less than two months before a war would therefore be considered male and drafted.

Overall, it's about five steps forward and one step back, and that's a lot more than we usually get. We can also consider ourselves very lucky that the final version of the law does not include the paragraph in which any name/gender changes were automatically transmitted to law enforcement. You can imagine how that would go.

If I may drop my long form serious tone for a moment:

AAAAAAAAHAKJD OH MY GOD IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED I CAN CHANGE MY NAME THIS YEAR ALREADY HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD HJBSAKJDSADVADAS

Thank you.

[616nightcrawler]

its soooo awesome how i get to read tags like this every other day bc my most popular post made its way into beatles rpf tumblr and they don't have the brain and foresight to understand that i (OP) don't think their headcanons about which beatle is fucking which is funny and quirky and in fact i think its pretty fucking gross

[starheirxero]

I'M BACK- I WAS GONE FOR A HOT SECOND, BUT YOU AINT GONNA GET RID OF ME THAT EASILY-

Not gonna lie, I was waiting for shit to hit the fan, until I was gonna go on a rant- This maaay not have been the best idea-

THERE'S SO MUCH GOING ON NOW- I AM EMOTIONAL ABOUT IT- I AM IN LOVE, I AM IN SHAMBLES- I WANT THIS SHOW TO RIP MY HEART OUT AND STOMP ON IT-

God, I am so intrigued to see where this is going! The character arcs get better day by day!

First of all, there's Eclipse- He keeps dissappearing for rather long periods of time, and anytime he comes back, he is just a little bit different. A little more docile, a little more half-hearted in his rudeness. A little more compassionate to help.

He's changing, becoming better, while still being Eclipse. All because he was shown a little kindness. All because there is someone who won't give up on him. Someone, who's love and care is unconditional, who looks beyond the surface, beyond snarky remarks and insults.

And God, Earth's words. It doesn't matter who he is, or will be. It doesn't matter, if he chooses to be Eclipse, or decides to rip this part of him apart and leave it behind. It doesn't matter, which name he will use, or what he'll look like. Because she sees him. He is the one who helped her, and who she bonded to. He's the one she cares for. There could be a day, where he decides, that he's not Eclipse. There could be a day, where he chooses a different name. She will have his back, because he's still the person she befriended.

The metaphors, the love. My heart….

But theres also the parallel to Moon. Because Eclipse is everything bad to Moon. The uncaring villain. Yet now they are changing roles. Eclipse is starting to care, and he is helping, in his own cryptic way. Meanwhile, Moon is slowly loosing it, becoming even more hostile and aggressive compared to old Moon.

Moon's descent is so tragic.

Moon is the big brother, the family's protector.

His love for his family is part of his system's very core.

When he beat Eclipse, he swore to protect them with his life.

His family is his purpose. The machine inside of him, begging for a task, has found purpose in keeping harm away, in keeping them safe and sound.

He is constantly focusing on making sure they're fine, obsessing over it, worrying beyond belief.

And now Solar is dead. His brother, a part of his family, is gone.

Moon failed his purpose. He failed in protecting his loved one. And he's driving himself insane over it, trying desperately to reverse it.

He hallucinates, afraid of loosing the rest of them.

He keeps belittling himself, comparing himself to old Moon.

Because he failed. But he will not fail again. He will bring Solar back, even if it's the last thing he does.

And he keeps his family oblivious. They cannot know, they don't need to. They'd try to stop him, and Moon cant allow it. Plus, ignorance is bliss. He will bring their brother back. In the meantime, he just needs to keep his siblings safe and sound, out of harm's way.

But he's also hurting them. Sun is worried. He knows his twin better than anyone, and knows something is wrong.

And Earth, oh Earth… She's now doubting not just herself, but others as well.

Moon is affecting his loved ones without realizing it.

And of course, there's Bloodmoon. Bloodmoon, who apologized to his brother, for not saving him. Bloodmoon, who ripped a bomb from his head, not caring about the pain.

Bloodmoon, who now has to refer to himself as "I" instead of "we".

He is so lost without his brother. He depended on him, always being guided. And now he's alone, and lost.

All he can think about now is revenge, even going to Ruin for help…

THEY MAKE ME SO I'LL, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM/silly-

-Stardust

I KNOWWWW THE SHOWS HAVE JUST BEEN BACK-TO-BACK PUTTING OUT VIDEOS TO BLAST ME ACROSS THE ROOM ITS SO HSKABDKSND,D

ECLIPSE'S WHOLE DEAL YESYESYES!!!! Oh my stars everything with him has been soso exciting to me I can't EVENNN!!! AND WITH EARTH AUGHHH DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED I'M SO EMOTIONAL ABOUT THEIR DYNAMICCC 😭 EXACTLY AS YOU PUT IT. The metaphors the love... the themes the messages!!!! EXPLODES.

AND THE PARALLELS WITH MOON OMS THAT DIDN'T EVEN OCCUR TO ME. THEY'RE SWITCHING ROLES..... I'm almost positive you can tie that to like, What Made Them act the way they are too yk. Smth about how loss(of identity, of a family member) makes them bitter and angry and cruel but even just the slightest bit of care and love(from a brother, from an unlikely friend) can switch things up...

OR SOMETHING I'm saying I See Your Vision and I'm so. AUGH. Everything with him lately has been so many layers of devastating :( This family is in got dayum SHAMBLES right now!! 😭

AND BLOODMOON I KNOWWWW I KNOW I HE'S BEEN BREAKING MY HEART LATELY. Watching him correct his "we" to "i" genuinely had me on the FLOOR. AND YEAH NOW HE'S ALSO HELLBENT BY HIS OWN GRIEF AND HE'S BACK WITH RUIN AND I'M AUAAHAGGAFGGGFRRRAAAA EXPLODES FOR 1 MILLION YEARS

[i-am-an-arson-enthusiast]

Here at i-am-an-arson-enthusiast, we i am dedicated to bringing you top quality content such as but not limited to: gay things, random thoughts, and even live arson that you don't even have to tune into!!

hi this is my intro post :D

Hiiii!!

here, have some basic info about me :3

name: anything goes pretty much but please use multiple names :] HOWEVER not neptune as that is reserved for @marcysbear :3c

OBLIGITORY QUEER SECTION!! i say that like i dont actively want this here. anyway! the labels i use are queer, bi, lesbian, gay, genderfluid, trans, gnc, non binary, genderqueer and arospec. arospec as in i am largely aromantic and use that as an umbrella term, however i am capable romantic attraction/ am flexible with such labels bc its all bullshit anyway.

i have audhd! i get hyperfixation and sometimes talk abt that if i so wish and my special interests are space and generally queer shit. also pls use tone tags i will think u hate me im too anxious for my own good sometimes

i am dogshit at spelling so. ignore the typos and misspellings!!

if u send me chain asks dont expect me to keep the chain going, ill answer it and say thanks but i wont actually do the thing

BOUNDIES!! GENUINE, ACTUAL BOUNDRIES!

-pls don’t send dono asks i don’t got money bc im a minor

-dont think if i have a take like "i dont like taylor swift" i am personally attacking you. you can like whatever the fuck u want idc everyone is entitled to their own opinoins. i just dont like her as a person

-DONT call me the reserved names if you arent that one person

-try to refrain from calling ppl (including me) baby/babe/bae around me it makes me want to die sometimes and i dont want to constantly be a romance repulsed little shit around u guys (this means dont use those names for anyone if i am in the conversation i cant control past that) (it also isnt a problem here i dont think ive ever seen it here its really just discord tbh)

-dont ask for my discord unless were friends or close in some way and dont get offended if i say no

-u can call me a faggot or dyke or tranny as long as you are the slur you are using

-if you have my discord and were moots you can call me a slut and a whore all u want idm :3 (bc i am a slut and a whore.) (really really sorry if you didnt want to read that btw /gen)

OH TAGS UH

i try to consistanly use them but sometimes i dont. sorry.

woah i’m using queue - i’m actually queuing a post for once instead of spam reblogging (which i mostly do sorry not sorry)

woah a real text post - me positing an actual text post for once but it’s becoming more common

cool ass art - art that i reblog (it’s all cool)

arson does half way decent art sometimes - my art. art i made. yea

moots feel free to ask for tags <3

i will keep adding more as i remember them and make them so yea :D also i try to tag for things but i often dont add tw or cw because. idk. just havent ever done that. if you need me too you can tell me in any form and ill try my gaddamn hardest to add them. feel free to *kindly* remind me if i forgot. (as in no verbal abuse ya know. if ur scared ur probably fine)

~~~~

i think. thats it. if u follow me and u didnt like this post dw im gonna screen u anyway <3

thank you for reading all of that i know it’s long. your cool so here’s a cookie 🍪 also here have this

~~~~~ blinky time ~~~~~

credit to @jeweledviolets @v-4-l-0-n and @theprideful :)