#here's to new beginnings

[viric-dreams]

It's not so easy to find work when you've spent your entire career... doing what exactly? Can you call the New Sequence project management? And it's not like you can exactly ask for a reference after how it all ended.

Maybe someone would be willing to hire an assistant. A stenographer, perhaps? Time to pick up some new skills. Practise shorthand by transcribing the poets at The Singing Mandrake. Until one day, one of your letters receives a reply. It's just a temporary position, working with a journalist. But it's something.

[rubyzoisite-fr]

Here are some trees as a thank you for putting up with me for over 10 years. I've changed so much as a person (for the better!) and I appreciate every step we've had along the way. I strive to be a more loving, helpful part of this FR community, not stuck in drama. Since the beginning of my art hiatus, I've grown a new appreciation for all the blooming artists on the site, and I want to support your guys' work more than I ever did before. I've let go of all the old negativity to make room for new, happy memories. I forgive everyone who's hurt me, as I also deeply apologize for being just as bad in my past. I love you all 🦋 Keep calm and dragon on.

🌳 Elderwood || Myrtle 🌳

[embersofvenus]

Happy Friday night, folks!!

I just did my last Friday night shift ☺️

[thesoulspulse]

Another Chapter Begins! In More Ways Than One!

This probably isn't that big a deal to anyone else but I FINALLY found my draft for chapter 16 of "Final Epitaph." I was honestly worried I'd never find it and have to start all over again so I'm glad I didn't give up on it. Now I can relax a bit knowing it'll be easy to resume working on when I'm ready! Turns out it was hidden in plain sight since I had it in a backup folder from last year, whoops. Speaking of which, to those who celebrate I wish you guys a Happy Holiday and a Happy New Year!

[blockednddeleted]

Start of Something New

Hi.

It's December 16th 2024. 3:39 AM. The world seems to be on some sort of cataclysmic downwards spiral, heading to some kind of disaster that will have us remembering these horrible moments we're living atm as the idyllic "before times." So, now seems like the perfect time to start something new, to take steps on my personal journey of growth and healing by putting myself out there. Or rather, further out into the digital world, a world I've been desperately terrified of since forever...in a time of international crises and turmoil — I have excellent timing.

But the "right" time was never going to happen. And as the years have ticked on and I've gotten older and older, I realized the only person that's been holding me back from the things I want in life is me. This is something I’ve been meaning to do for a long time, and I’m finally doing it! Taking this step of creating a dedicated tumblr to share my art, my thoughts, and a piece of myself in this space.

Now, don't go misunderstanding me here, I've been on tumblr for ages. But I've existed mostly as a kind of lurker for way longer than I would care to admit. Rather than, say, being an active participant. I kept meaning to do that and *this* for ages. Sometimes I would get really close but then panic and bail. I struggle a lot with fear around putting myself out there. Well, all the fear really. The fear of being seen, fear of not being seen, fear of making mistakes, and fear of losing control. Fear, fear, fear. Fear has had more control over my life than me for too long now and I'm sick and tired of it. It was unfortunate that I first encountered this site when I did. During the really awful days of tumblr, when it was really really toxic. It really helped the fear have a unbreakable titanium grip on me for decades.

Not that the internet has gotten less toxic since then, if anything it's gotten even more dangerous and hateful. Though the vibe on tumblr does seem to have become a lot more chill since then. I may be wrong about that, but I was here for the fountain chocolate parrot thing, so I'm pretty confident. The main thing that's led to *this* has just been exhaustion. The constant fear takes a toll, and constantly being terrified is fucking exhausting. and seeing how I've nearly died in complete silence a couple times now, I'm at the point now that I'm like, fuck it. If I keep waiting for this supposed "perfect" moment my anxious brain constantly says there is, at this rate, I'll be dead and gone before it ever happens.

So here's to saying fuck it, let's do this!

I intend to keep this blog as a place for me to share my art, thoughts, and writing — personal, fandom-related, my own work, or otherwise. I already have an instagram which I've been posting to every so often. I don't really get a lot of interaction over there. But that was kind of why I started with that account first, I liked that it felt like a literal ghost town. I have no idea what I'm doing in that space, so weirdly, it felt safer than others. But I'm ready to come back to my home turf now.

I hope some of what I do here will resonate with someone out there, but even if nothing I do here reaches anybody, I’ll be proud of myself for trying. For daring to exist.

If you’re reading this, thank you for being here.

Here’s to starting, even when it's scary — hell, even when it's downright terrifying.

To finish this post off, I've included a little doodle I did the day after the election. That was a dark day. But then I crossed paths with a dragonfly. It was a rare encounter so I took notice. I'm not a religious person by any stretch of the imagination, but I do care to notice little things like this, even if the skeptical grouch in my mind wants to huff and wheeze about it.

So, that night, when I was feeling sad and remembered seeing the dragonfly, I looked up what it's been thought to symbolize and needing to create something, anything, as a reminder that this darkness was only temporary, that life was still worth living, I drew this. I didn't have my drawing things or even a blank sheet of paper. Only a pad of lined paper and some crayola markers. Bud I'm so happy I still did. It may not be perfect, or particularly pretty or skilled, but it's mine. And that's all that counts.

[thepeacefulgarden]

[obsob]

days are getting warmer but i am always warm when im with you ! !

[thesargasmicgoddess]

Cheers to 2025!🎉🥂

Thanks for spending another year with me ❤️! Wishing everyone a lovely, happy, and healthy 2025!😘

Xo-Sg

[tricoufamily]

more ancient ocs i got bored and made as sims. they were doing every tired annoying romantasy trope years ahead of the curb smh i could have been making booktok bucks

[gothpossums]

got nothing but my sweat and blood to reverse engineer the god

[keferon]

Just want to say, love your mimick au. I only found it like, an hour ago and I've devoured everything in the tag and I'm planning to do the same to the spellbound and monster hunter aus.

That said, in one of the mimick fanfics, Orion tells Prowl to leave him alone and to find a hobby, but a comic that (presumably) happens after this conversation when Orion meets Jazz, Orion seems to be back to working with Prowl. I thought the whole "leave me alone" order would go on infinitely because Orion didn't seem to have his goal locked down and he also never specified when to come back. So how did they return to working together? Did Orion find Prowl post-meltdown, or was it Prowl who just set an arbitrary amount of time before going back to Orion and going "so, how do you feel about defying god?" I just find Orion and Prowl's relationship so interesting in this au, simply because of how Orion doesn't seem to apply his morals about freedom and coexistence to Prowl despite the fact he's the one who points out that Prowl didn't include himself in his calculations, but at the same time, if he doesn't recognize Prowl's autonomy and only sees him as a tool (chatGPT style), he would have to accept that he's the one responsible for Prowl's actions because he's the one using him. But also also, Prowl encourages him to not take responsibility for all the immoral actions (like killing monsters to keep the Council's favor), which I think Orion does take up, but that would indirectly be accepting Prowl as a individual capable of making his own decisions, you know? It also the fact that Orion and Prowl both have different (and somewhat incompatible) ways of communicating. I was thinking when Orion asked Prowl to what he'd do to make the most amount of mechs happy, Prowl understood it literally: the majority of the population are non-monsters, so statistically, he'd focus on making non-monsters happy. But Orion doesn't want to make most mechs happy; he wants a diverse and equitable society, and that doesn't necessarily lead to happiness, especially in transition phases. Even in the academy, monsters are learning to compromise to live in a non-monster society; compromises are about restriction, which often aren't a source of happiness. But Orion equates that vision to happiness, and probably gets a bad impression of Prowl given "free reign" from his answer. It's great, it's so juicy.

And contrasts so well with how Prowl and Jazz interact and communicate with each other. Like how Prowl makes an attempt to learn hand language for Jazz in the same way he attempts to comfort Orion post-Shockwave demonification. But unlike Orion who has "Prowl is not alive" at the core of their dynamic, Jazz doesn't know and sees Prowl's attempt to learn as a genuine attempt to understand/communicate. You can argue that Prowl is just "programmed" to try and get more information and it's just efficient to ensure Jazz doesn't get carpal tunnel while working together, but you can also argue that we're all programmed to do that as well; small talk or bids for attention are behaviors/actions to build connection through information exchange that we are trained to do from formative years and general society. Which is to say, even if Prowl learns and tries to accommodate Jazz for mission purposes, it doesn't negate the fact that he is investing effort into communicating and building the foundation for a meaningful connection in the same way other people do. It's great, I'm having a blast with the whole AU.

Orion despite being afraid to continue his mission still has responsibilities in his Order so him and Prowl. Yeah hahah they just keep working together but purely on their usual legal tasks. I didn’t talk about the whole situation enough yet but basically Prowl never informed Orion about his new quest of suing God. Primarily because he knows that Orion definitely will try to stop him.

It’s kind of like. “What isn’t forbidden can automatically be considered allowed” mentality.

Also MY GOD YES. My favourite part of this au is reading asks like yours:0 Prowl exists in that thin line between being and not being a person capable of his own choices. Orion exists on the thin line between considering him being one of those options. He can’t see Prowl as a “real mech” because he knows for a fact it’s not true. But then seeing him as a tool means accepting that all questionable things he does are Orion’s responsibility.

At the end of the day Prowl is a metaphorical piece of fabric Orion uses to clean his consciousness. In his eyes Prowl isn’t alive enough to be fully blamed for all the bad things he does but he is also alive just enough for Orion to say “it was your fault. Not mine.”

Jazz doesn’t have that dilemma. Uh. Yet haha he will discover the truth eventually of course~. He thinks Prowl is obviously a real mech because in his world magic isn’t alive. It can create an illusion of a mech, sure, this is what all usual golems are, but it’s not smart or believable enough. It’s like one of those tests where all people think they can tell if they’re talking to an AI chat bot because “duh I would obviously know” and then fail to distinguish AI from a real person. Jazz is perceptive but he doesn’t know what to look for. All he knows is that Prowl is somehow doesn’t love anyone but seems to care about of things that aren’t people.

Also it’s a bit unrelated but I find it soooo interesting playing with the usual concepts of magic and technology. Because usually magic is perceived as something more “coming from your heart” and “connected with emotions” while technology tends to be more “soulless” and “emotionless”. And then we have the entire world of robots who think they are alive and magic isn’t :)

[glitchedcosmos]

The colour blue reminds me of you

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

A fierce duel commences!

[fiona-fififi]

I actually think it's very funny that Buck brought Tommy back to Eddie's house to fuck him. Like, talk about projecting your misplaced feelings.

[nadiuu]

@mattmelloweek 2024 - Day 3: New beginnings

[soothedcerberus]

Hiii I finally finished this Spyro comic... and predictably, its just another silly fluffy thing. 💜