#he actually turned his life around
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moodboard of shit i constantly quote which results in nobody ever knowing what the hell im talking about
#š¦: my posts#š¦: silly#multiple pictures#posts#lets play in the food processor together#the ipod brothers#ipod brothers#asking homless freaky questions#your mama so go to hell she is damned for eternity#weeb who just learned what japan did in ww2#gay aids torture chamber#he actually turned his life around#im going to jeff the kill you#we got the torture labyrinth tomorrow#we're emo!!!!!!#me and my friends would have killed et with hammers#this meal needs more epic bacon#brush my teeth to this#barry please kill my little sister#something really lgbt happened to me yesterday#webkinz#milk webkinz#webkinz milk#i piss so hard it rips
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in light of tedtrent becoming so real, im also jumping on the tedtrent epilogue š
there's just no way ted wouldn't keep in touch with the others (and have weekly zoom meetings just like in the christmas special) and I just love the thought of the whole team having reunions once in a while.
and going back to trent's arc in s3, the sunflowers conversation, "And your daughter?" "She's never been happier." I think it could go the same for ted.. we've never really properly saw how henry felt about his dad being in london, it's always other people that told ted his son misses him, who's to say henry would rather see his dad happy because that in turn would make him happy too? he was there to win the whole thing, right? I just know tedās story isnāt done yet when he still hasnāt learned to let others take care of him in return and who else to pair him with than the man who blew up his career because a man was nice to him (and also because they were so. so cruel for the fakeout tedbecca scenes for that finale) š„ŗ
I'm no writer so just pretend these are snapshots of a slow burn fic where ted visits london for their team reunion and slowly realizes that trent has a crush on him and they kiss about it š
#ted lasso#trent crimm#tedependent#ted lasso fanart#tedtrent#ted x trent#I HAVE SOOOOOO MUCH MORE THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS BTW its just that its 4am rn and i cannot type down my thoughts for the life of me </3#im just so not over that ending and how weird it felt for ted to end his story like that.. not like he can turn back to michelle since#dr. jacob is right there.. i want this man to feel loved and cared for and actually have a place he knows he can call home and that was#richmond for me.. to the family we were born with. and to the family we make along the way etc etc etc#ted lasso spoilers#<- FORGOT ABOUT THAT.#i can finally say i loved the ending for all the callbacks and stuff but I NEED THIS MAN TO BE HELDDDD!!!!! *everything explodes around me*#he even went back there WITHOUT BEARD :( his bestfriend for sooo long who was there for all their ups and downs. i dont like beard and jane#being together but the fact ted didnt even go to their wedding too like ...??! what is going onnnn#also graying lasso is just something so indulgent for me . hush#pn.art#JUST YKNOW!!! I HOPE YALL UNDERSTAND WHAT IM SAYING ITS REALLY REALLY LATE I PROBABLY SHOULDVE WAITED TILL LATER TO POST THIS BUT JAHJVAKDG#my memory is really bad too so i could also be misremembering scenes and im too eepy to check the scenes i had in mind so u_u#ALSO apologies that its taking me sooo long to draw things i recently joined a mc server and ive been playing it all day and night HFSJGFSH#im sooo scared of making these type of posts because i dont have the balls to make the wrong choices in other people's eyes but GRAAH!!!!!#<- i love tedtrent bUT WHAT IF PEOPLE THINK IM CRINGGGEEEE!!!!!#THATS ALL.... i have more drawings in mind that ill get around to later.. for now goodnight <3
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Okayokayokay last time talking about Sabaody Sanuso but--
He's so not normal at the thought of losing Usopp.
#'he's just frightened in general' to YOU to me he's thinking about usopp#well actually he does turn around and yell 'USOPP!' a second after so yeah he IS thinking about him#finding incredible how it is not 'let's all run away c'mon usopp AND brook AND the others'#it is specifically 'usoppusoppusopp' for sanji#that is the face of a man about to lose the love of his life#okay i am shutting up now i am so sorry#one piece#black leg sanji#sanuso#sabaody
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people act like tommy leaving the date is the worst crime to ever exist and forget that buck is a whole ass adult who can take care of himself
#yeah he's coming to terms with who he is / his identity etc etc#but tommy isn't responsible for that#he hardly knows buck#tommy has his own peace to protect and if he doesnt want to be involved with someone who doesn't understand their feelings yet then he is -#100% within his right to do that#it doesn't make him some awful human being#it makes him an emotionally mature adult who is looking after his own wellbeing and in turn looking after bucks#don't think people realise that tommy giving buck some space to breathe by leaving the date and EXPLAINING to buck why he is leaving#was actually the catalyst for buck speaking to maddie and eddie and thus beginning to work things out for himself#but alas#i forget that a large portion of āfansā don't know how to behave like adults#and have blinkers on when it comes to buck and what they want to see#it's giving uwu little bi baby buck needs to be babied#no babes he's an adult#yes it's rough coming out / figuring out your sexuality in later life of course#but he is also an adult and has a large support network around him#he's okay girls#911#bucktommy
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playing my game with my friend
#freedyn#<- my new tag for me playing halflife#that first barney. um. i accidentally killed.#I DIDNT MEAN TO. I FEEL SO BAD#HE WAS ALREADY HURT AND I TURNED AROUND TO SAY SOMETHING TO HIM AND MISCLICKED AND BEAT HIM TO DEATH#i fell out of my chair to my knees i felt so fucking bad. oh my god#i SHOULDVE LEFT HIM AT HIS LITTLE POST ohh my gpd. im gonna hurl.#the other barney was just an actual madman he took out all the vorts in office complex by himself unprompted it was kind of scary#he jjust ran past me and started shootin and was like :D did you see that shot!#trailing behind him like yeah babe i did that was so cool. are you feeling okay#HE WAS BEING SCARY he was so brave and charming but jesus christ#*i* didnt have to kill them but. woah#transmission#VIDEO GAMES ARE FUN#half life#barney calhoun
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The reason Kevin didn't jump on the opportunity to date Gwen is because he didn't think he was good enough for her.
#ben 10#gwevin#thinking about how kevin only reciprocated after they stopped the highbreed....... y'know. when he helped save the world#HIM. kevin levin. homeless addict who tried to kill people. HE helped two people who should never give him the time of day save the world#it's proof to him that he CAN turn himself around. he CAN be worthy of Gwen#this is also why he lashes out at her in s3. because he just started thinking he could turn his life around and then that mutation happens#he convinced himself that gwen was one foot out the door because he was never worthy of her to begin with#and if he pushes her away himself then somehow it'll hurt less when she inevitably leaves#but she never does. why doesn't she?#seeing kevin actually become a happy and confident person through uaf and into omniverse goes so hard šš
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okay so i'm actually waiting for my dad to watch arcane so i have to wait a couple days (also had to stop mid episode 4) and i see everyone hating on jayce including friends and you know what
(my theory is that he killed viktor (only reason everyone would hate him that much) and for the record he's one of my favorite character with vi and ekko)
I WILL SUPPORT HIM NO MATTER WHAT, HE PROBABLY HAD HIS REASONS AND EVEN IF IT'S TRUE AND IF THAT WILL MAKE ME CRY I DO THINK HE NEVER DID ANYTHING WITH VILE INTENTIONS OKAY HE IS A GOOD MAN
(also kinda suck that caitvi don't have any content but at least i can't be spoiled, a win is a win i guess)
#jayce thalis#i'm his biggest supporter and he's not even my favorite character lmao#but the more his life falls apart the hotter he gets too and i don't want to have a crush on him#caitvi#jayvik#i guess?#i did see some pics of viktor and sky lol#a new ship to feed into#skyvik#love this#at least she's not a woman in the fridge anymore?#(i do think the hexcore was using his guilt at the end of episode 3 but apparently there's more to that)#anyway#arcane#arcane season 2#this is a no-hate jayce thalis post guys#especially since i don't actually know what he did and i might turn around and be his biggest hater in some days who knows#(never)
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Srry I dont know if this is spoilers, but what would the Season 2 Finale be like in Canary Continuity? Would anything be super different?
its simultaneously both a spoiler and not, because there's some stuff about ninpo in CW that's spoilers so i cant go over it yet. NEEDLESS TO SAY they will already know about it (trying to phrase this in a way that doesnt give anything away), so im not sure how the emotional core would really be with raph, considering spoilers spoilers they dont rlly have to "unlock" it when theyre already so knowledgeable. all i can say with that. im pretty sure everything else would be closer to canon, albeit with a lot more intensity because everything's hardened them quite a bit (theyre still HORRENDOUSLY silly, its a rise classic, but when it comes to important battle there's less fucking around, and they watch out for each other a lot more, especially with donnie who's going to struggle on the field despise his insistence otherwise. i think the way they approach the shredder would be WILDLY different.)
HOWEVER
i think losing the old lair is going to be less traumatic and a lot more cathartic. i wouldnt kill off shelldon because ive been cruel enough, donnie would probably just have to rebuild him. theyd look at the rubble of their former home and finally breathe.
its scary to have to go through the rubble and salvage what they can. its the loss of a lot of childhood memories, and change is hard. but fuck, that place was a HELLHOLE of bad memories for all of them. i think they'd jump at the excuse to move, despite having to leave a lot behind and having to rebuild. unlike CU i think the process would be a little slower and everyone would be helping out to the best of their ability, and it would genuinely just be... healing. it's a group project. donnie didn't even realize before this point how much weight being in the old lair put on his chest until he felt the relief of it gone. they have a chance to rebuild, and while its still an adjustment, it's happier. being in the old environment is definitely a contributor to his anxiety NOW in cw, mind you.
i think what you should worry about is the movie. not something i'll ever be touching but think about how raph would react after the fact to beating up and choking leo while kraangified. that is all.
#ask#canary continuity#also cant say anything about the technodrome because the effects of it kind of vary depending on personal interpretation#up to you if you want that to be another fresh dose of trauma or not#also the leadership switch?? who knows how THAT'D go. i cant see leo putting his brothers on the line like he does in canon#idk might be more interesting to play around with him throwing around his OWN life even if hes a decent leader#make that a more intense and worrying trait of his. and its more what raph is getting after him for#instead of him being responsible for the little ones#because leo has learned the importance of taking responsibility in cc already#but i think its very possible he would overshoot and turn to a martyr complex Fast#raph would see himself in that and he'd find it extremely concerning#especially considering theyve already had a scare similar with donnie. several actually. thats the vaguest way i can phrase future events
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Both my parents actually suffer from HORRID emotional dysregulation and are prone to snapping and going into rages. My sister is the same way tbh. I am now realizing this is why they are constantly baffled by the question of whether or not I am mad at them.
I don't have external meltdowns.
I could. I don't let it happen.
I keep my rage on the inside and stay pretty quiet about it. It's just as strong as theirs [physically shaking nose bleed from high blood pressure kind of bad], but like as a kid I saw how terrifying it was to be around [dad breaking dishes, mom putting our lawn chairs into walls] and I just internalized that I wasn't going to wear that anger on the outside.
So my mother genuinely cannot tell if I am just being quiet or if I am silently hearing the dial-up noises of pure rage. This has lead her to both making strong and confident statements like "You are a pacifist who would never hurt a fly U.U" but also acting like I am secretly dangerous maybe... It's because she has never seen me snap.
She knows what her temper is like [throwing chairs through walls], she knows what my father's temper is like [pick up child and toss out door], and she can tell I am being tested, but she doesn't know what happens when I snap or where that breaking point is.
Her -perhaps unhinged- solution to this, my whole life, has been to do things that should obviously enrage me or shut me down completely, like ignoring important boundaries, repeatedly, punishing me for expressing emotions or needs at all, etc... And then to constantly ask me if I am angry with her when I get too quiet [right after near directly telling me to shut up].
It has occurred to me now, they have never once seen me lose my temper, so they literally just can't tell if I am angry at them. My sister is easy, my mother fights and screams with my sister constantly, my mother understands this. My mother doesn't have any grasp of feelings or boundaries that are not screamed at her [apparently, and I fear my sister is the same way]. Her and my sister are close despite constant fucking fighting because they understand each other.
They are trying to get me to engage the same way and it is not working. I realize now that this has been hard for them.
I was so successfully taught to suppress my emotions, by being punished for any outburst, that rage quiet looks the same as any other kind of quiet from the outside. To them anyway.
I did tell her. For the record. I used my words. I did tell her very calmly that my response to rage, in order to avoid doing the things that terrified me as a child, was to simply leave [the autistic urge to GTFO]. When a situation or person causes too much of the dial-up rage noise, I simply extract myself from that situation, up to and including never speaking to a person again. I explained this calmly. I explained it calmly 100 times and I explained that I explain myself calmly as my rage response 1-5 [also pretty much every other negative emotion tbh], and I told her that what came next was me simply opting out and fucking off. I told her this. I couldn't understand why she never took me seriously, or why she never fucking understood.
I couldn't understand what made her like this.
But it's the same problem I have with everyone else multiplied by a factor of 10.
If I am explaining myself calmly, they can't understand that it's actually serious or that I am actually upset. ESPECIALLY because they read me as "female" and women "aren't that rational" so if I am not screaming and crying about something, which I never do, people assume I can't be upset and it isn't serious.
And then after having my boundaries ignored too many times despite having calmly explained how and why it's a problem [shaking inside or not]... I leave. I leave and everyone gets upset like this is unexpected behaviour, even though I told them 50 times that is how I would respond if they kept doing *the thing.*
And for neurotypical people especially, they are expecting there to be a disconnect between what someone says they need or feel and what their actually boundaries and feelings are, and they expect the latter to be demonstrated with emotions. Telling them bluntly you do not function that way somehow never helps?
My mother isn't just looking for normal yelling or a few tears to know I am serious, whether or not I do those either [I don't], she's looking for an explosion to know there's a problem at all.
Fucked if I know how she proceeds through life this way in general or if this is just her expectation of her own kids???
And I couldn't get why my mother couldn't read my emotions and didn't seem to think I have any. It's because she's testing for the rage limit to see where my 'actual' limit is instead of taking my word for it. Never the fuck mind that she could simply *not* test at my boundaries instead of letting me have them. Separate issue.
I couldn't figure out what made her *like this*
She's expecting me to throw a giant meltdown violent tantrum at people when I have 'actually' had enough. Maybe she got away with those being like 5'4" in another time, but I am the size of the average man, I do not get to have giant screaming rages, whether or not people perceive me consciously as a woman, and least of all because a lot of people -at least unconsciously- read me as 'masculine' or at least always "they guy" of the situation compared to all other women and some men [bigger stronger and more rational, more able to just absorb the damage and let it go so the less rational screaming/crying one doesn't have to be dealt with]. Even if it was in me to be willing to terrify people [usually never], there are such limited instances where it wouldn't just blow back on me. Potentially very dangerously.
I am going to be the quiet calm one. You are going to have to let me use my words, bitch.
So she kept ignoring my boundaries until I had to cut her out of my life, and she probably doesn't understand and probably thinks it feels sudden -after 36 long years of bullshit- abrupt and unfair.
But I told her hundreds of times.
I probably should have just screamed at her.
#good stay out of our yard' and he didn't seem to know what to say to that#but other than that I don't think anyone in my adult life has ever seen me turn aggressive at all to the point where people 100% like to#play games of testing my patience and my boundaries because they think my tolerance is infinite#but like I have autistic rage tantrums on both sides of my family and they are just happening inside my head#And somehow it took me until now to realize that being that way was actually -expected- of me by my parents and especially my mother#and that by keeping myself outwardly level headed to be considerate I actually took away whatever signals she can understand#to have empathy for how I must be feeling#I mean it's still all on her#but it makes so much sense of why she's fucking *like this*#And why my sister thinks I hate her just because -she- stopped texting -me-#but that fucking guy#Every time I was like#In my adult life I have screamed at someone ONE whole time and it was 1000% deserved#And I threw heavy objects around one whole other time and in my defense I didn't do it in front of the guy he just felt the ground shaking#heard the thuds and came back to the logs blocking his path because that fucker wouldn't stop parking in our yard after being asked#and then TOLD not to about 10 times because he was acting entitled to just park in our yard and was crushing my plants???#seriously I don't know what his deal was but he wouldn't stop telling me how much the ground shaking scared him like it was supposed#to get my pity like I think this guy took one look at the logs I had just tossed down and was suddenly afraid of this āwomanā he was#bullying in their own yard and so my ability to feel bad for scaring him had gone straight out the fucking window#I looked at him and said stop parking in our yard instead of your own you are killing my plants#he'd just fucking be like 'well the last people to live here let us D: :)ā and I'd be like āgood for them?ā āstopā#and he'd just keep doing it#I was having a week of insomnia and was finally having the best dream#the kind of sex dream you have like twice in your life#and this fucker had just gotten some noisy ass little bike with a spoiler on it#and starts it up right under my window at 3am from IN OUR FUCKING YARD#so I had a nice long anger nap and just after he got home from work and was sleeping in his house#I picked up these chunks of deadwood tree from the back#there was like 3-4 logs that used to be a WHOLEASS fucking oak tree Like these logs were not as heavy as they -looked- but they were still#this fucker deleted half the tags I wrote and I am not retyping that fuck you tumblr so fucking hard
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Has anyone talked about how each member of the Genius Society represents the over reliance on the belief of intelligence but not the act of intelligence?
#like they mostly take up resources and are pseudo-celebrities more than they do useful things#They act more as villains over consuming resources that could be put to better use#If anything more people should hate them#In universe not like as characters#but just like in real life - people don't notice how awful they actually are#I think at one point it's stated that Ruan Mei turned a desert planet into a lush jungle or something?#I cannot emphasize enough -- she fucked over that ecosystem. That was fucked up of her. She killed everything.#And people praised her for it! They don't care about science. They care about the prestige. She's famous. Nous chose *her*#Herta doesn't even do her own work. Nothing would get done if it wasn't for all of her assistants.#Screwllum is god-king of his own planet. I mean he also killed a god-king but you can't go around replacing one with yourself#Which is what makes Ratio so fun. He notices and calls them out.#but also in a way where it's hard to tell if there's jealousy involved or not.#And his version of intelligence is helpful. He gives back to his community. He cares about people first even if they annoy him.#The only Society members I respect are Stephen (baby); the one philanthropist (thin ice); the spider (awesome);#and the serial killer who kills other members who I strongly suspect to be Herta but that's another conversation entirely#Anyway I just think it's odd that they're an obvious analogy for how people think there is such as thing as āintelligenceā#that can be declared by some all-knowing all-seeing creature and everyone else is āworthlessā by comparison#to even be said as much by a character in the game#and the audience still thinks they're supposed to be smart.#Nous was created by an egotistical man who was himself first recognized by his own biased judging algorithm#The Genius Society isn't the epitome of intelligence they are Silicon Valley#like the parody is so fucking on point there are literal jokes in game if you pay attention
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Decennial
(2,396 words)
Evan and Gregory, now age twenty-two, celebrate the tenth anniversary of their meeting in the comfort of their shared apartment.
Its already the afternoon when Evan meets Gregory at the couch in their shared apartment, smartphone in hand. Gregory glances up from whatever he was watching on TV, quickly grabbing the remote to pause the channel.
He doesn't even have a chance to greet him before he notices Evan's face. Worry quickly creases his brows, and he moves to get off of the couch. "Evan? Hey, what's wron--"
Evan tries to convey that everything's fine with no words. Because it's true. He just can't muster any up right now. When Gregory seems to understand enough, that's when Evan thrusts his phone into Gregory's line of sight.
Gregory shifts on the couch, taking the phone and studying the screen to no avail. Hes pulled up the calendar on his phone, the date reading March 4th, 2045. Gregorys brows furrow, then, "Uh. I dont understand."
Evan would have rolled his eyes if he weren't so emotional right now. He scoffs, tapping the screen and mumbling "The date. Look at the date."
It only takes another moment for Gregory to understand. Evan can almost see the gears turning in his friends head in the moments before he gasps sharply. "Oh!"
Gregory doesn't look away immediately, just taking it in as if it surpises him. "Its ten years since we met today."
Evan nods at that. A small smile stretching on his face when Gregory finally turns to look at him.
But he should know by now -really, it's been ten years after all- that Gregory knows him. Probably better than Evan himself.
"What's with that look?" Gregory questions, seemingly noticing how Evans smile doesnt quite reach his eyes. "You look sad."
Evan shakes his head immediately. "No-- that's not it." He replies, feeling a bit more fit to speak. "Its just..."
"Ten years?" Gregory prompts, and Evan nods. Gregory seems to get it. He sighs a bit, and Evan can tell hes not alone in reminiscing. "Jeez. Thats..."
"...A long time ago." "A big number." They say at the same time.
Evan joins Gregory on the couch, taking his phone back. Ten years. Ten years since he met Gregory. Ten years since Evan had been that little ball of anxiety. Ten years since the best thing that ever happened to him.
Nine years since their first holidays together. Eight years since they started high school. Four since they graduated. Three since they started college.
One year since they got their first apartment together.
Evan chuckles all of the sudden, loud as a jet engine in the seemingly silent room. "Do you remember what we always wanted to do as kids?"
Gregory only has to think for a moment. "You mean what we made a reality?"
"Yeah." Evan replies. "We got that apartment. Not exactly the college dorm we imagined, though."
"Psh. Are you kidding? Our apartment is way better than any dorm we could have gotten." Gregory scoffs. "We would have like. One room to our name, and we would have to share."
Its Evan's turn to scoff, this time. He smiles, the memories coming back easily. "You're acting like we didnt basically share your room when we were thirteen."
"You were always there." Gregory agrees, but Evan knows by now that Gregory doesn't mean it in a bad way. Never. That's one of the things that have changed since they met. Evan doesnt assume the worst first, and ask questions later anymore. "You got that right."
"Thank god we had Vanessa to tell us what to do." Evan says. "We would be lost without her."
Gregory snorts, shuffling on the couch. Evan glances over, and strangely, being here, in this moment, even though its nothing differnet from what he and Gregory do every day, reminds him so much of when he and Gregory would just hang out together on his bed. Drawing, watching videos, talking and laughing... all of it.
"Its a good thing she told us to get an apartment while we still could." Gregory says. "We would have burned down the entire dorm."
Evan giggles at the thought. It wouldn't be the first time he and Gregory would make a mess in the kitchen. He still remembers how scared he was as a fourteen year old, when he had burned some of the food meant for Vanessa's 'Welcome Home' dinner Gregory insisted they make. The Fazbears house had stunk of char and smoke for days afterwards.
He was terrified at the time. If he had ever done anything like that at his old house...
He shakes that thought away. He does that often. Thinking back to his time alone with his father and brother. His biological ones. It's been a challenge, shutting down his brain when it tries to recall the memories.
Its another thing that's changed. As a kid, he knew nothing about helping himself and his anxiety. He didnt want to. He never saw himself as worthy of deserving relief, and it was so subconscious, little Evan never even realized it.
Now, it couldn't be more different. Hes never been healthier.
Who knew all it took was a best friend for life?
He looks over at Gregory. Who's still recounting some of their old childhood memories. Evan doesnt talk to Michael anymore. The damage he caused is too much to ignore. Evan... Evan doesnt want to see him anymore. Despite Michaels wake up call, it had been all too late. The damage had been done.
Michael missed his chance. Evan had decided that a long time ago. Maybe he should have had his change if heart earlier if he didnt want Evan to find the brother he always wanted in someone else.
Because that's what Gregory is. Its nothing new, they were having these revelations when they were only teenagers. Probably even earlier for Evan. But Evan never stops thinking about how much Gregory truly is his family.
That suprise and shock of the kindness hed received from Gregory from little Evan ten years ago is hard to shake when all hed been taught his whole life is how to hate himself. How he deserved to be treated badly, because if he hadn't been the way he was, he could have made himself worthy. A respectable man. Tough. An immovable rock. Real men dont show their emotions, or even experience them. Real men can defend themselves. Real men start to toughen up at the ripe age of twelve.
Evan is twenty two, now. So is Gregory. This life they'd built for themselves, with such a bright future... little Evan never would have even dreamed of. Little Evan had thought there was nothing there for him. Little Evan had thought there was no light at the end of the tunnel. That he had been doomed from the start. That his nature nipped his figure at the bud before it could begin.
This life theyve built for themselves. When Evan had ran to the Fazbears as soon as he'd turned eighteen with only a bag of clothes, a binder full of drawings, and yellow bear to his name. When he'd shared the room that felt like his own as well growing up with Gregory. When they'd spent those few months together until getting into the same college and choosing an apartment.
This life theyve built for themselves. That Evan would have only seen as a fantasy when he was eleven.
Theyve changed so much. It always shocks Evan every time he sees an old photo, or really remembers what it had been like pre-Gregory. Evan is growing out his hair, now. Before, all hed ever had was a months overgrown generic slickback. But he gets to choose now. Like how he paints his nails. Gregory has never really cared about his appearance, but he saw a photo of his Dad as a college student and immediately went to go replicate the blue streaks in his hair when it was time for himself to go off to college.
Evan almost laughs sometimes when he thinks about how much Gregory really is just an older version of who he was when he was twelve. He's different, like Evan is, but he's the same as well. A constant.
He knows hes the same, as well. Just with longer hair, bolder clothes, and the power of experimentation. Gregory has never been one to care much about his clothes, but to Evan, its everything. To be able to wear what he always wanted as a kid. To not be confined to whatever annual clothes his Father would buy him from the back to school section. Its freeing.
It's in that moment that he thinks back, really thinks back to his life pre-Gregory, and the contrast of the before and after.
It's all too much, in that moment. The memories and the sentiments and the nostalgia. In true Evan fashion, he cries about it.
Gregory has long since learned how to differentiate Evan's tears between his emotionality and a genuine issue. So when Evan begins wiping silent tears away, he just smiles one of those smiles he does, and pats him on the shoulder, pulling him in for a side hug.
Its digging a hole in Evan's chest, this feeling. It's not bad. But it's not exactly good either. It's some kind of a loss, but a hope as well. Remembering how much he loved back then. As much as he loves right now.
"I--" Evan stutters, sniffling. Gregory hands him one of the many boxes of tissues they always have on hand in their apartment. "It... It feels like we need to celebrate, somehow. I mean... ten years is big."
Evans mind floats to a cake. Or a two person party. Or a collaborated drawing. Evan's mind floats to many things. Many options. Ten years is big, right? Something that big needs a big party. Something big to commemorate it.
But Gregory just hums, and lays eyes on the thick shelf of DVDs they have tucked by the wall right by their TV. "How about a movie night?"
Evan's about to interrupt, say something about the milestone, but Gregory continues. "Do you remember all our favorites as a kid?"
Evan stops himself short, almost scoffing, because of couse he does. How could he not, when he and Gregory had stayed up so many times to watch them together, alongside stifled giggles and ice cream straight out of the carton? "Of course I do."
Gregory gets off the couch, crouching by the bookshelf and picking out a select few movies. Evan catches the titles on the packaging from all the way were hes sitting. Every single one of them is special to him.
Gregory deposits the movies on their coffee table, three DVDs spilling out onto the glass surface. "Then I can't think of a better way to spend the night."
Despite Evan's attempts, he cant either. Despite watching these movies almost regularly with Gregory even now, opening the casing feels different in this moment. It feels special. Evan feels like hes thirteen again.
Before starting their marathon, they make a huge bowl of popcorn, pouring caramel on it just how they liked it as kids. As they continue to now. Evan gets the carton of ice cream out of the fridge, handing Gregory his spoon and taking his own.
All they need is a throw blanket and they're ready. It's the exact setup they've done for years. Starting ten years ago today. This tradition has lasted this long, and it will outlive the milestone.
It feels so familiar, Evan cant stop thinking. His emotions are dialed up to eleven tonight. It only increases when the sky darkens outside their windows. He remembers coming home from school with Gregory and just. Immediately piling onto his bed with snacks and pillows and turning the lights off before they'd dive into another movie. Only going to bed when Freddy forced them to.
Because that's what it was. Thats what it still is. Home. All Evan feels right now is home.
They laugh at all the same parts. They cry as well. They cheer. They point out the same things. Nothing has changed.
Sure, ten years is big. But Evan can't think of a better way of spending the anniversary than continuing to do what hes loved to do with Gregory throughout the years. This doesnt mark the end of an era, or a big change. It marks how long hes had the gift of his brother. His family. His real family. The fifteenth mark will, as well. So will the twentieth.
All the tenth mark says is hes had ten years worth of joy and growth. and He'll continue to do just that.
After the third movie, Evan takes a quick look at his phone. The numbers 12:03 look back at him from his lockscreen, a picture of him and Gregory. The date has switched to the 5th.
"You're my brother." Evan says suddenly to Gregory at the beginning of the fourth movie. Gregory pauses in stuffing his face with popcorn to look over at Evan's earnest face. "You know that?"
Gregory chuckles wetly. It seems Evan isn't alone in the sentimentality tonight. "Only since we were preteens."
Gregory pulls him into that same side hug he always does. "You're my family." Gregory tells him sincerely. "You always will be, too. Hell would freeze over before our family would ever say you aren't one of theirs."
Evan chuckles, eyes misty, because he knows its true. He can imagine his family's reactions so vividly. "I know."
They only sink further into the hug after that, the movie continuing on. Theyve long since stopped with the thank yous. Not since they got it through Evan's thick skull that they arent doing him a favor. They just love him.
It's in that moment that Evan realizes that tomorrow is another day. And there are more after that and after that. Theres more milestones to reach, more years to spend with his brother and their family, and he cant wait to experience them.
But right now, he's content continuing a ten year long tradition as a mundane celebration for a non-mundane achievement.
It's not mundane to him at all, anyway. It means the world to him.
Besides, he can't imagine a world where his family doesn't throw a suprise party for him when he and Gregory visit them tomorrow.
ao3 link
#after writing so much about how gregory affects evan in the present i wanted to do something different.#especially since this is the 10th work in the series!#so this fic takes place in the future. in my little universe gregory and evan continue to live together for a very very long time.#i imagine after so long of in their heads adopting evan#and also gregory and evans mutual feelings of being family and eachothers siblings they would just.#not beat around the bush any longer. i think everyone knew in their minds#but when evan hightailed it to the fazbears when he turned 18 they all actually sat down and were like#okay so we agree that evan is ours now.#anyway their lives continue to be good and they have eachother and experience life with one another.#they feel emotional in this fic over it being a decade since they met but there are no hard feelings over their current life.#just reminiscing over their childhoods :) especially since its so special to evan specifically as a turning point in his life#he feels more intensely over it#i wanted to write somethinf different with them and here we are#i make myself emotional over my own incredibly specific au#pandas writes#flashlight duo#flashlight duo modern au#flashlight duo oneshots#gregory and evan#this is classified as the future with them being kids as the present in the universe btw#oneshot#nostalgia#the fazbears#fnaf gregory#evan afton#au
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like why did they change where Vegeta was when Cell announced the cell games in the anime
why did they make this vegeta starting shit with yamcha instead of chillin in the lab with his family? why did they take Bulma out of the lab? Why'd they say she was Out while Dr Brief was repairing 16? Why did they change Bulma working on advanced robotics to running in late with her baby?
it's the same scene except: - Bulma's actively at work being a scientist - Vegeta's not being rude to her (or anyone else!) - Vegeta waits for Trunks instead of leaving the room - Cell interrupted the airwaves, which means Trunks and Vegeta were just hanging out with Bulma and Dr B while they were working
Those are all Great Character Details!! That the anime rails against!!
#these cowards afraid of showing Vegeta actively choosing to be around his wife and child even when he's Bad#Because Goku who is Good never ever even once makes that choice onscreen outside of filler#and then they justify that choice by making Chi-Chi seem horrid and unreasonable for (checks notes) Not Wanting Her Child to Die#anyway I am once again being bitter about anime vs manga klasjdklasd#I can't believe I let the anime convince me I hated Goku man Goku's SUCH a good and ridiculous character in the manga#the anime just SUCKS at letting him be who he's always been#and has to reframe and recontextualize and reword everything he does so that it seems like he's Actually Quite Mature and Thoughtful nO#THAT's VEGETA YOU COWARDS#also the fact that bulma said she wouldn't live with him at the beginning of this arc to him casually hanging out with her and trunks#after cell beat his ass and humbled him is REALLY GOOD SUBTEXT for their shared relationship having improved without showing it#it's great subtext for all three of them and toei just went 'nah' and decided to make it a whole group shot so ...? Master Roshi could sit#and explain how ??? Tournaments Work??? Just so Cell could log on and also explain how tournaments work?? God it's been so long#since I've watched the anime and now when I do it just makes me mad aklsdjskja the manga is SOOOOO much better#there are some spots where the pacing is more ideal in the anime like goku turning ssj for the first time but like man. everything else is.#like why are you making Goku snarky with Vegeta dude his clapbacks are SO much funnier when they're just Tactless Honesty#like Vegeta's not insulted by Snark bitch he grew up in the Freeza force that man was raised by THE bitchiest drag queens#Vegeta's insulted by someone saying something deeply and insultingly True to his face as if it's the fucking weather#Goku in the anime is like 'a battle of wits hoho' but Goku's purity is part of the joke he's not snippy he's just got no social etiquette#He's just honest! He's not trying to be insulting. That's what MAKES it insulting! That's the WHOLE GAG of why Vegeta can't stand him#Goku is always just telling the truth and it's always the rudest shit Vegeta's ever heard in his life#'it's a sunny day! i'm way stronger than you! see you out there bud!' 10000% Genuinely Friendly. Golden Retriever-Ass Pure.#Infuriating. Hilarious.#anyway I looked at anime clips to make sure I remembered things right and that was a mistake#as someone who has a soft spot for it and grew up on it -- compared to the manga it's bad and it's always been bad#and toriyama was right to be disinterested in watching it jesus christ they BUTCHERED his work#anyway this has been another shot of haterade with sketches thank you for scrolling my rambletags askljdask#dbtag#i just truly can't get over how they make Vegeta call her 'woman' in the anime and he literally only ever calls her Bulma in the manga#except for on namek when he refers to her as 'the/that woman' because she is a complete stranger#why is he calling her woman like he's a 1940s american husband and not an extraterrestrial from a deeply advanced society toei
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I think my brain should ruminate on the important characters but for some odd reason I'm staring at an unimportant side character and nodding in interest to myself. š
#Yeah sorry guys#brain decided tonight is a Think About Fresh kinda night <3#new age specifically ofc#TAG LORE DUMP SURPRISE-#So Fresh is the middle brother. is he *actually* related to Geno and Error? shockingly yes! they're blood! but while Geno and Error got#magic relating their magic to the world around them. Fresh relies on the world around him to sustain his magic. His soul is weak and#has been since childhood. One day he went missing out in the woods and Geno had to go searching for him. only to find that there was... some#*thing* on his soul. in this AU the parasite acts to keep Fresh alive. Fresh is its host and in turn it siphons magic out of nature (and#on occassion threats to him). The Parasite is a sort of nature spirit (a much younger brand of entity like the Tree of Feelings) and it#Chose Fresh. so. Fresh can go out and āspeak' with Beasts of magical origins. he just understands them. they're drawn to him. and he befrien#ds the ones he can and slays the ones he can't. Dangers to his bros are no-goes.#He stays out so often tracking beasts because he relies on moving. by staying in one place he devours life like a plague.#Geno and Error had such powerful magic they were unbothered. but if Fresh stood too close to a person with low magic for a few minutes too#long? he could kill them from exposure alone. so he avoided traditional school. and towns. and guests. like a cryptid#chasing Error put a lot of people at risk but he cared for Error more than anything.#and yeah. Fresh has a couple friendly beasts that will homing-beacon to him if he reaches for their magic but he prefers to be alone when he#is able.#he's just so silly and goofy#new age au#OH! he also has a bird he uses to send messages between his family
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I caved and made them real. Obverse me losing more and more motivation to draw as I made each of these back to back lol
#keese draws#oc art#oc#pmd#pokemon#pokemon mystery dungeon#pmd oc#these guys are inspired by my usual pokerogue team#oh also imagine a question mark after every he/him I have the trans woman beam pointed at all of them#these are just initial concepts for the actual characters themselves now that Iāve developed the world a lil bit#but yeah these 4 were childhood friends who wanted to be in an exploration team together but had to split up for years#tart and quart both had to move away and cart ended up leaving his hometown to try and become a real adventure a few months later#cart and bart remained in contact for a few years before cart got caught up in some crime circles#he was incredibly trusting when he was younger so he got taken advantage of and ended up digging himself a deeper hole in an attempt to be#manipulative back and eventually he got scared enough that he tried to reach out to a guild and acted as a spy for them in turn for them#eventually helping to clear his name and allowing him membership#there were parts of the deal that were unfair and kind of shady but he was desperate enough to pretend he didnāt notice#after he joined he started immediately putting out listings for new team members and he fully planned on being super picky#but when two of his childhood friends applied he was over the moon about it#and immediately accepted both of them#now quart also applied because he had recently ran away from his old life and was desperate to have a new one#and he missed his old friends deeply so when he saw one of them actually managed to start building the team they all wanted to make he was#quick to apply even if he was rusty as hell on normal non contest combat#cart didnāt recognize him at first and mostly only let him have a trial run because he thought it was funny that an eevee of all things was#applying for a high level exploration team and he fully planned on telling quart off immediately afterwards#this ofc made quart very upset and angry but he didnāt try to clairify who he was because he just assumed that time had made cart into an#asshole which isnāt wrong per say but quart didnāt realize cart didnāt recognize him#it was a rough trial expedition but cart found himself actually quite impressed with quartās slight of paw skills and his impressive biting#speed so he decided to give quart a real chance instead of a mocking one#eventually quart laughs for the first time around him and that makes cart realize who he is and that makes him feel horrible
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A Klingon and a half Vulcan discuss childhood dreams. [Patreon | Commissions]
#Ehergha#S'veyk#beas ocs#klingon oc#vulcan oc#star trek ocs#comix page#S'veyk and Ehergha are traveling to Ehergha's family's home so they can all meet her for the first time#and Ehergha mentioned that the caves might be confusing and S'veyk said that actually she used to play in caves all the time as a kid -#Vulcan has a lot of them. Ehergha didn't know that! That's how this conversation starts#S'veyk & her sister didn't have a good start to life but then Sek fostered & adopted them and things turned around!#Ehergha doesn't like hearing about it bc it makes him SO upset to hear how she was treated but also wants to hear about it bc means learnin#more about her...basically he doesn't want her to misunderstand his anger (she understands perfectly~)#S'veyk smiles usually only when people aren't looking so she doesn't get comments about it. Typically doesn't emote though (feels no desire#but Ehergha....<3 she likes him so he makes her smile every so often.#//implied abuse#bea art tag#the family meeting goes well btw! Ehergha gets embarrassed to death bc his family is like /FINALLY/ WE GET TO MEET YOU!!!#AFTER ALL THE LETTERS AND RAMBLING CALLS!!!
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"NoƩ" being the name of the biblical savior of all life.
"Vanitas" meaning vanity, futility, something that is ultimately meaningless and doesn't last. I am unwell.
#there is also this interesting thing going on where their dynamic clearly represents the conflict between selfishness and selflessness#but vanitas ends up being the successful savior despite doing it for his own benefit#while noƩ fails to save the people he actually cares about time and time again#I'm very curious about how they're gonna handle the theme of salvation and what it really means#I think it's implied that killing vanitas would be an act of salvation for him#when his formula gets rewritten to the point he's no longer himself#but chloe d'apchier's storyline seems to kind of contradict the notion that death is the answer and a perfect escape#and with how vanitas views himself as a lost cause already... wouldn't it be nice if they kind of turned it around#like no. you don't get to die. you need to life and that's harder#because I think showing a character who doesn't see a future for themselves and has given up on hope#be forced to confront the fact that that's not the case at all. that there is in fact hope for them#would be more interesting that simply proving them right#<<me delusional about a character that's clearly doomed by the narrative#vnc#the case study of vanitas#moje
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