#having anxiety and adhd and autism is like:
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Having a shitty past is no excuse for being a horrible person, and Snape was a horrible person. Snape fans always try to turn him into a tragic hero, but there was nothing heroic about him when he was just an obsessive bigot who followed a group of genocidal maniacs
Well, I think I’ve said this a million times already and explained in exhausting detail why growing up in a particular environment—lacking social, emotional, economic, or essential support—and being subjected to violence during the most crucial years of cognitive development creates the perfect breeding ground for antisocial behavior. It also makes vulnerable or socially excluded youth prime targets for sectarian groups (whether religious, political, or otherwise) that prey on their situation, offering them promises of protection, safe spaces, surrogate parental figures, or social progress. These groups actively seek out kids with emotional voids caused by dysfunctional family dynamics, minimal to no financial resources, and a profound sense that the system has failed them at every turn. They offer these kids an alternative system—one that gives them a roof over their heads, a hot meal, a place to belong, and people who won’t marginalize them like the rest of society has—at the simple price of blindly following the group’s ideology. And they do it. Of course, they do. Because what other choice do they have? This group gave them life, a place in society, and restored their status as human beings.
But since I’ve spoken about this at length before and about how Severus’s life shaped his decisions, I feel like I’m starting to sound like a broken record. So, since I’m also reading a legal ruling I need to memorize by Friday, I’m going to indulge myself and dissertate as freely as I please—because hey, if you’re going to throw hate, I’m going to grant myself the privilege of replying however I want.
Here’s a question: why does it even matter? Seriously, what does it matter if he was a shitty person? Do you know that people go to space today thanks to the work of physicists and engineers who were literal SS members? That after WWII, all the top scientists, physicists, chemists, and engineers were granted amnesty and fast-tracked into citizenships so they could work on government projects? That people working within a stone’s throw of concentration camps are the pioneers behind some of the greatest technological advances of the 20th century? And you don’t care that the products you consume are derived from the work of collaborators with mass genocide, but you’re upset that people find a fictional character interesting? I don’t want to sound cynical, but honestly, it’s ridiculous to get so morally high and mighty about a character who doesn’t exist and who followed an extremist cult for, what? 3 or 4 years tops? and then canonically worked actively to take it down. If we put Severus in a real-world, wartime context, the guy would be a literal war hero with medals to his name. No exaggeration. If he survived, he’d be recruited with a fat paycheck to work in internal affairs for some major world power’s secret projects. That’s just how the world works.
And yeah, he was obsessive. But in an era where everyone suffers at least one anxiety episode a month, where the best-case scenario is that your panic attacks don’t spiral into chronic mental health issues—can we really judge him for that? Like, most of the people I see being ultra “snater” are folks who openly declare themselves neurodivergent, and one of the common denominators of all neurodivergence is obsessiveness. All of them. Whether it’s chronic anxiety, depression, OCD, ADHD, paranoid schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder or autism. Every single one has an obsessive component. So it’s kind of ironic—and even hypocritical—for people who are themselves pretty obsessive (because let’s face it, we’re all compulsively doomscrolling here to soothe our anxious compulsions with little dopamine hits) to judge this character’s obsessiveness as a negative trait. Maybe let’s take a good look in the mirror, too.
And let me just say, no court would convict Severus of collaborating with a terrorist group. Not a single one. Impossible. Especially since he literally collaborated against said group, so any judge would happily clear him—not after the war, but the moment he struck his deal with Dumbledore. Severus is what’s known as an informant. He worked from the inside, exposed himself to greater dangers than regular agents. Legally speaking, there have been cases where people guilty of heinous crimes—including crimes against humanity—were let off because they provided critical information. So imagine someone like Severus, who, as far as we know, didn’t even kill anyone during his time in the group, willingly spilling the beans and agreeing to work as a spy. He’d be celebrated as a hero of war. Hell, they’d probably buy him a mansion in Florida if he wanted one. That’s just how our system works, and honestly, this kind of moralist posturing is pretty cringy because you’re talking about a guy who literally saved half of magical society’s asses and without whom the kid destined to save the world would’ve died in his first year at school.
You can dislike him or think he’s a jerk, but he was damn good at his job. And compared to the people he’s often unfairly measured against (Sirius, James, Remus...), he actually did something. They didn’t. Absolutely nothing. Contribution: negative one.
#pro severus snape#severus snape#pro snape#severus snape defense#severus snape fandom#severus snape meta#severus snape analysis#snape#snapedom#harry potter meta#harry potter
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I just saw someone say that being expected to uphold the weight of a conversation and another person being a dry responder is transmisogyny.
Have these people heard of:
Autism
Anxiety
Depression
Avoidant Personality Disorder
Dependent Personality Disorder
Schizospec disorders that may cause dry communication styles
ADHD
Dissociative disorders when they impact communication
Depressive swings in bipolar
Social awkwardness from meeting someone via a dating app
Different communication styles
This can't be a complete list, but it's not transmisogyny. Hard to communicate with someone who doesn't put in work? Yes. But it's not transmisogyny. Apparently interpersonal relationship issues are somehow systemic. It's also pretty ableist to assume that's actually bigotry and not the more likely case of just someone else having a different kind of communication than you do and not being compatible. Just communicate with people and say "I do not like having to handle most of a conversation" please people. Good example of how tumblr likes to ignore ableism or use ableism as a gateway to claim other bigotry though.
extremely funny because I'm really self-conscious about how little I can give back in a conversation and feel like people are constantly noticing and upset by it but not telling me
must just be internalized transmisogyny
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Hello, this is Stanford pines
And Stanley!
We agreed that I would be writing the intro, Stanley
Come on, Poindexter! Let me have some fun.
Ugh, whatever. Regardless, this is a shared account between us made at the request of our great-niece Mabel. She said there was a lot of “Simps” on this platform (note to self, look up “Simp” meaning) and insisted we made an account. You may ask us questions, we will post every so often, we will not be on all the time, however. Thank you
-Stanford Pines
((OOC and DNI under cut))
((Hi! This is an RP account of Stanley and Stanford Pines! The mod is @gamzee-simp492, and he is in the EST time zone so the characters will be responding during those time zones. Anything OOC will be in this font and close off by double parentheses. This is also an AU, some lore of it will be posted as well as fun little QnAs))
((DNI: Comshippers (Proshippers are ok as long as you know the ship is toxic and don’t support what’s behind it I.e. p3d0s, z00s, etc), basic DNI stuff like queerphobes and racists and all that, people who are gonna hate on me for not having it be canon accurate, etc. idk what other DNI to add, may edit as I go))
((A few bits about the AU and my HCs!!
• Stanley, Stanford, Mabel, and Dipper are all Autistic! Mabel and Stanley (Stan) are more bad with social rules rather than social cues and where Stanley is short-tempered, Mabel is easily upset. Dipper and Stanford (Ford) are bad with social cues, really smart, have special interests (ford - supernatural, Dipper - astronomy and the Unknown), and more anxious.
• Pronouns and identity HCs for the Pines family are as follows;
Stanley: Any; Cassgender (masc lenient), Bisexual.
Stanford: He/They; Demiboy, Unlabeled sexuality and romantic identity (can’t find the right label for himself), dates pretty much any gender/being.
Dipper: He/They/It; Transmasc w/ non-binary tendencies, Quioromantic (romance confuses him and he’s bad with it), Omnisexual (fem pref), Demisexual
Mabel: She/They/Glitter/Cat/any sparkly or cat-related xenopronouns; Xenohoarder (mostly cat related and glitter related, will make a list eventually), Pansexual.
A few extra hcs
Fiddleford: He/It; Libramale, Polysexual (very little attraction to women, mostly everything else).
Bill Cipher: He/They/It/literally anything but those are the ones he uses most; Pangenderless (Fluid between all gender while also simultaneously none of them), Unlabeled sexuality and romantic identity (he doesn’t want to be labeled)
Soos: He/Him; Cis male, Straight Ally
Melody: She/They; Female, Straight Queer (associates with the queer label, but is still straight)
A few ships!
Mabel X Pacifica
Dipper has no ship yet cause idk
FiddleStan
BillFord
Past FiddAuthor and a bit of past BillFiddlesFord (right before the portal incident)
Soos X Melody
And that’s it in terms of ships. But a few other HC of the au are as follows
• Full disability list minus the Pines having autism; Stan has anger issues, addiction issues (drinks and smokes a lot, not around the kids though), PTSD and a hint of schizophrenia from the memory gun. On the topic of the memory gun, Fidds! Fiddleford has PTSD, memory loss, schizophrenia from the memory gun, temporary memory relapses, ADHD, and fainting spells. Ford has PTSD but gets affected differently, addiction issues (caffeine. No, seriously, it’s an issue), mild somniphobia (fear of sleep) from past Bill issues, schizophrenia, su1c1d@l tendencies (canon), Hyperthymesia (super memory), social anxiety (mostly dealt with, still gets anxious sometimes and has panic attacks), and polydactyl (his sixth finger). Soos has Down syndrome, motor skill issues, sensory processing disorder, and dyslexia. Wendy (who won’t be mentioned much) has BPD, mild social anxiety, and ODD. Dipper has generalized anxiety disorder (canon, actually), mild depression, PTSD, OCD, SPD like soos, and a fear of failure. Mabel has ADHD, depression, fear of change, attachment issues, PTSD, and SPD. Bill has ASPD (antisocial personality disorder), anger issues, hallucinations, PTSD, depression, phobias (canon), insanity (canon), conduct disorder, autism, DID (will explain when asked), and a bit of SPD.
• Bill went through the theraprism in this RP AU (the au this rp comes from that I created) but is still very much mentally unstable. Has a bit of handyman au inspo where he does live and work at the shack but he isn’t stuck there. He is triangle but has a human form that he despises, his powers are limited no matter the form, and he’s prone to fainting spells if he uses too much power at once. Soos and Melody trust him cause they were the ones who found him, but the others are kinda weary still. Including Ford.
That’s all I can think of! Feel free to ask any questions, give me feedback, etc! Also please be respectful of the characters pronouns, don’t ask too NSFW questions (some are okay, but I will be the judge of what I will and will not have them respond to), and enjoy!
Signing off (=^ ◡ ^=) ))
#gravity falls#fiddlestan#billford#billfiddlesford#stanford pines#stanley pines#rp#new rp#gravity falls au#bill cipher#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddauthor
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[Image ID: A tweet thread that says "a common ocd fear is becoming a pedophile? uh what" replied to with "Yes it's one of the most common intrusive thoughts" the first user replies with "that's psychotic i have intrusive thoughts constantly and like 5 diagnosed mental illnesses and and never are my thoughts 'fuck kids'".
Another user shares this thread and adds "'that's psychotic' well, yeah, it's a mental illness."
Another user retweets this user and says "funny how people have very little sympathy for ocd, bpd, schizophrenia etc. when they're exposed to symptoms that they can't romanticize. There's nothing fun, pretty, or enjoyable about mental illness. We're not exactly having a good time." /End ID]
Maybe this is friendly fire but the "I have mental illness but I'm not like THAT" folks... I think they're really just "does not have this disorder but assumes they do because they're upset sometimes OR has something like low support needs autism or ADHD or mild depression and anxiety which still do have stigma around them but aren't exactly known as the 'wah scary murderer' disorder so they've never had to experience this for one day in their lives but pretend they could just to insert themselves in other disorder spaces and then push the people actually belonging to that space out"... if you know what I mean.
Also that person calling this "psychotic" PISSES ME OFF. That's not what that means. That's not what ANY of that means!
Not to mention, intrusive thoughts can't win! At least 90% of the time. Saying things like that can make OCD worse for people but really, you're not going to go out and become a murderer! You're not going to wake up one day and hurt your loved ones!
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So I know your autistic Wild (my beloved) has Brenda and Brenda the second for soft friends, does he have any other soft friends?
Do you have any autistic or other neruodivergent head canons for the other Links? (Even if it's just what kinds of things you think they might have for special interests)
OOOOOO wonderful questions!!!!! Authenticity Wild my beloved
He has SO MANY soft friends. I also imagine Flora has a lot too, especially ones with scented things inside- they help her feel grounded when she dissociates or is remembering things related to the Calamity. Their beds in their house (separate beds in the same room on the loft) and their couch are just filled with soft friends. None are as special as the Brenda’s, of course.
I think each culture throughout Hyrule would have a different kind of most common toy and most common stuffed toy. Once everyone figured out how much Wild loves soft friends, they always gifted him one when he helped out the town. Wild loves this so much. The first time it happened he cried from overwhelming emotions of happy and grateful and feeling loved and appreciated.
Other link stuff below :D
I definitely like to imagine all of the Links as neurodivergent. When I have them rotating in my head I like to give them different diagnoses to ✨spice things up✨ and get more diversity in there. Here are the ones I usually give to each Link:
Sky: autism, dyspraxia, dysgraphia, dyslexia
^there is a series I follow of Sky with epilepsy, and I also really love that headcanon
Time: autism, Tourette’s syndrome
Twilight: depression and anxiety disorders
Wind: Down syndrome
Alternatively for Wind: FASD
Wild: autism
Hyrule: ADHD, CPTSD
Four: synesthesia, OCD, sometimes DID
Legend: borderline personality disorder
Warriors: PTSD, anxiety disorder
When I have them as all autistic, here are what I imagine their special interests are:
Time: masks (as a child, not so much anymore), cows, had memorized every dad joke to ever exist
Sky: bugs and birds :). In Skyloft birds was mainly just Loftwings, but then when he discovered all the birds on the surface it became all birds. He single-handedly catalogues and describes all the surface birds.
Warriors: battle strategizing, sewing
Wind: sailing, pirates, also characters from a storybook his Grandma used to read to him and Ayrll every single night (at Wind's insistence)
Wild: cooking, horses, cataloguing plants in the sheikah slate
Legend: magical items, jewelry (jewelry with magical properties are the COOLEST SHIT)
Hyrule: biology/anatomy, and there's a series of books they once found in an abandoned town that they LOVE. Books are hard to come by in their era so those are their absolute most prized possession
Twilight: goats, wolves. He knows every. Single. Fact.
Four: clocks, tools. Four wants collect every tool in existence, and wants to know exactly what it does. Especially blacksmithing tools, bc Four also really likes blacksmithing
#thank you so much for this ask#I welcome distractions today specifically <3#linked universe#lu sky#lu legend#lu warriors#lu wild#lu time#lu hyrule#lu twilight#lu four#authenticity#autistic chain#autism#neurodiversity#there’s so many I don’t want to tag them all
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have to check out of this appartement at 10:00 am. it is now 9:25 and im trying to decide whether I should go for a run around the (completely unfamiliar) block bc i brought my running shoes but havent used them yet and it’s the only item left unchecked on my ‘list’ for this trip and that doesnt Work for me
#what will she do?#come back for the devestating results#having anxiety and adhd and autism is like:#i still need to check this off my list that was the plan it cannot NOT happen#(but i cant go outside)#(but there are still six other things you left for the last minute that you need to do before 10)
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I never knew this blog existed until now
So hello everyone! :D 👋
- ALT - FRESH: Wassup!
- IDK - I'd like to mention when there's no background/blank background they're not in an AU, but whenever there is a background they're in an AU
MAIN: @inkyu
Back | Start | Next
#Non Ask#Should I tag random background sanses?#IDK I feel like I should cause I found this cool looking sans called Cupid!Sans#Cupid's not an MC of ATDV btw I should mention that#In fact there are gonna be a lot of AU cameos in BG's#Well besides the Neurodivergent Time Trio (yes I call them that)#they have like 1 scene that affects Dream in the story and I have that planned out in my HEAD!!! (also the NTT is Anxiety#ADHD#& Autism)#anywhos TIME FOR TAGS!!!#cupid#cupid sans#fresh#fresh sans#swap#swap sans#ink#ink sans#error#error sans#dream#dream sans#oh man I hope I didn't miss any details#utau#undertale#undertale au#fanart#ask the druggieverse#atdv#druggieverse
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They are here
#tbh#btw#idk#autism creature#adhd creature#anxiety creature#trans artist#(also I gave BTW a sweater cuz I wanted to)#(and i headcanon them to have like... creeper body. 4 tiny legs with long torso)#meme
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writing a fic abt rick having an ed bcs why would i recover when i can just project all my issues onto fictional old men in cartoons and pretend everythings better now ‼️
tw eating disorder, minor self harm and vomit near the end
Morty stopped in the open doorway of the garage, watching Rick who was sat scribbling down some kind of invention idea, or equation, or whatever it was he did when Morty wasn't around, for all Morty knew he might well be writing fanfiction.
An involuntary smile pulled at his lips at the idea of his almost 70 year old genius grandfather spending his free time writing silly little stories at his work bench. What would he even write? Ball Fondlers fanfic? Maybe he wrote about his stoic bird friend, Rick had always been touchy with him and Rick wasn't touchy with anyone.
When Morty focused back on Rick he wasn't writing anymore, the slightly crumpled piece of paper shoved to the side as he fiddled with what looked like a small metal box with a bunch of brightly coloured wires poking out of the sides. A small spark shot out of one of the wires Rick was holding and he cursed loudly, shaking his hand.
"Fuck, Morty, are you just gonna– gonna stand there, or are you gonna pass me the fucking, uh– the thing."
Rick waved his hand in the general direction of the shelf nearest to Morty, but there were so many assorted trinkets on the shelves, Morty had no idea if Rick wanted a wrench, or a hammer, or one of his laser guns, maybe the box was like a new battery for them?
"W-what thing, Rick?"
"The thing, Morty! The fucking– the uh, destornillador."
"What? Rick, I don't know what that means. W-w-what is that?"
"Jeez, Morty, what are they teaching you at that crap school you love so much?" Rick scowled, tossing the box to the side and getting up to grab the screwdriver himself.
"I havent been to school in like a month, Rick!" Morty exclaimed. "And even then I only got to stay for like an hour before you were dragging me out again!"
"Whatever." Rick said with a burp, "School's dumb, Morty. I'll teach you Spanish myself. B-but, uh, not now."
He turned back to his box, done with the conversation, but Morty stayed hovering in the room, remembering what he had come for in the first place.
"Okay, um, w-w-well lunch is ready."
"I'm busy."
Morty sighed, having expected that answer already. "When's the last time you ate, Rick? Or slept? Or... showered?" Morty said, wrinkling his nose a little.
Rick ignored him, pulling at a blue wire.
"Rick!" Morty frowned.
"What, Morty? J-jesus christ, what the fuck do you want?"
"I want you to have lunch with the family."
"And I said no, so screw off."
"Rick, come on, it would make mom so happy."
Rick glared at him, not bothering with an answer.
"...Wouldn't y-you do it for your original Beth if you could?" Morty tried.
Rick slammed the box on the table, causing the thin metallic shell to crack, sparks flying from it, the sudden noise making Morty jump.
"The fuck did you just say?" Rick snarled.
"S-s-sorry!" Morty squeaked. "I didn't m-mean– mean it in a bad way!"
"Get the fuck out." Rick said icily, eyes blazing.
Morty stumbled out of the room, shutting the door behind him to the sound of something crashing. Probably Rick throwing the damaged box across the room.
Morty winced. In his defense he was worried about Rick, and sometimes, depending on his mood, something like that would've gotten Rick to cave, clearly he wasn't feeling so sentimental today, more annoyed and angry.
"What was that about?"
Morty startled a little and turned to see Summer looking at her phone behind him.
"Just, y'know, Rick being... Rick."
"Mhm, pro tip, don't bring up his dead daughter to try and blackmail him into something he hates." Summer drawled. "You can only do that if he's already half convinced, or if he's feeling especially depressed sometimes.
"Summer! That's– that's messed up!"
She quirked an eyebrow. "Oh, yeah, so only you can manipulate grandpa Rick?" Summer scoffed. "God forbid women do anything." She said sarcastically and turned to walk away.
"Wait!" Morty fidgeted with his hands. "Can you... help me? To get him to have lunch w-with us? Please?"
"Yes, but not now. He's already upset so if we double down on trying to get him to eat he's only gonna clam up."
Morty nodded. "I know that– but how do you? You don't spend as much time with Rick as I do."
"Because he's like mom. Who do you think got her to stop drinking before parent-teacher conferences at school?"
"Wow. That's pretty fucked up that you had to do that, though, y'know, Summer."
"Yeah, well, we're the Smiths, Morty. Is anyone in this house not disordered?"
Morty winced at the blunt statement, Rick really was rubbing off on her. But it was kind of true.
"Guess it runs in the family." He muttered
"Guess it does."
---
Morty hadn't been planning on seeing Rick again until the next day. He knew that when Rick got upset he needed his space. Morty didn't quite get it because when he was upset all he wanted was for someone to hug him and tell him everything was going to be okay, but Rick wasn't like him he supposed.
If he was being honest it made him nervous to leave Rick alone in those bad headspaces he got into. Rick was volatile and unpredictable and a borderline danger to himself and often others. He'd walked in on a couple... compromising situations where Rick had had to explain away why he was passed out in his chair or why there was blood on his hands and his lab coat despite being the only person in the room.
Morty pretended to believe him when he said he had been doing a messy dissection experiment or that "This isn't blood, this is Balorkian dust I mixed with red Squanchenite fluid from Planet Squanch, Morty." But truthfully those moments haunted him.
However, he didn't want to invade Rick's space, so he let him be and tried to eat and sleep until Rick emerged like nothing had happened, even though Morty knew what habits of his went on behind those closed doors.
Of course Morty's patience had it's limits, like when two hours after he had left Rick in the garage, angry, there was the sound of something smashing, closely followed by an unmistakable sound that Morty had grown too familiar with since Rick had moved in. The sound of a body thudding to the ground.
He was up from the sofa in a flash, at the garage door before Summer could even put down her phone, flinging it open.
He felt like he couldn't breathe, but the only sight that greeted him was a smashed bottle and rick lying on the floor next to it, not looking any more dead than usual, looking up at Morty blearily, cracking a smile.
"Oh, hi Morty. H-hey buddy." He slurred, clearly drunk out of his mind.
"Jesus fucking christ, Rick." Morty said weakly.
"What happened?" Summer breathed, now standing at his side.
"He's just drunk." Morty muttered, wrinkling his nose at the overpowering smell that he hadn't registered before between his state of panic and shallow breathing.
Summer ventured into the garage, picking up an empty bottle and sniffing it. "God, grandpa Rick, what the hell are you drinking in here, fucking rubbing alcohol?"
"Sum-Sum! 'M just having some– some fun drinks. Fun drinks just a lil' bit. Besides I only ever drank rub-rubbin' alcohol once, n' it was– tasted like shit."
"What? I was being sarcastic, why would you drink that?"
"Because I was sad... was sad 'nd lonely after B-b-blood Ridge, couldn't find anythin' else. But 'm not s-sad now."
"What's Blood Ridge?" Summer frowned, "Actually it doesn't matter right now, you need to sober up."
"Get him some water," Morty interjected. "I'll clean up the glass. I also know where he keeps all his hangover serums and stuff, but he told me not to let you into any of his drug stashes."
"Fair enough." Summer shrugged, leaving to get Rick some much needed water.
While she was gone, Morty felt along the wall until he found the small hidden panel under Rick's desk. He fished out the light blue vial of fluid for hangovers, the red one he'd forced Rick to make that would sober him up and a green one that basically equivalated to getting your stomach pumped if you took it, just in case he'd taken more than just alcohol.
He shut the panel securely and placed the three coloured vials on Rick's work bench, grabbing a purple tube-like gadget from a shelf. He pressed a button on the back of it and typed in "Broken Glass" on a small hologram keyboard that emerged, then pressed that first button again. A blue ray shot out, scanning the garage, and the pieces of smashed bottle disappeared in a matter of seconds.
Morty looked over at Rick, who was still lying on the floor, but now he was tracing his fingers along a crack in the cold ground, his expression so solemn he almost looked sober.
"Rick?" Morty asked hesitantly.
"I miss her." He said flatly. "I miss her s-so much."
His words were still a little slurred but his tone had lost all the previous levity.
"I tried to save her, Morty, I t-t-tried, but I couldn't bring her back. And no one could ever replace her." A rough sob escaped his throat. Morty felt frozen. "I'm a crappy fuckin'– piece of shit father but I didn't want to be. I was gonna fuckin' give– give up everything for them, and I would've been happy. I would've been so happy as long as I had them, but he fuckin' took that from me! I nnever even got a chance."
Rick was crying, he was crying so hard that his tears stained the concrete dark grey and snot ran down his face sideways. He was shaking like a leaf and gasping for air.
Morty crouched down next to him, fists clenching and unclenching, unsure if he should hug Rick, or if that would make it worse. What else could he do?
"Oh– oh shit, Rick, I–"
"My little girl, my baby." Rick continued between sobs. "She meant everything to me. S-so yeah, I would be better f-for her if I could, but she's gone. There's no point."
Rick's sudden fit of violent sobs was calming down, replaced by a look that Morty could only describe as pure hoplessness and defeat washing over his features.
"'S no point in anything."
Shit, this was bad. Rick didn't admit defeat, and he certainly didn't talk so openly about his feelings like this.
"Aw jeez, Rick, come on don't– don't– don't say that. we killed Rick Prime, remember?" Morty said, wringing his hands anxiously.
"Yeah, I remember." Rick said, tone now devoid of emotion. "I remember killin' him with my bare hands, watchin' the life drain out of his eyes as his blood dripped down my fists. And I remember nothing changing. W-w-what d'ya do when you achieve your life long goal and nothin's better? It didn't bring them back, it didn't– didn't give me closure or give me a reason to live. I still can't sleep, petrified he's in the fucking house, comin' for my new family, that he'll kill all of you to teach me that t-that's what happens when I-I care about people."
Rick wiped his face with his lab coat sleeve, rubbing away the snot, drool and dried tears while Morty just kneeled next to him, frozen and unsure what to say.
"Rick..." he started but then Summer stepped through the doorway and Rick's demeanour instantly changed.
"Summerfest!" he called out and Morty watched, a little shocked, as Rick's whole face changed in the blink of an eye, going back to the cheerful, goofy expression he'd been wearing when he and Summer first came in. It didn't look artificial to Morty at all, even now that he knew it was. How could Rick just switch it on and off just like that?
"I brought water and coffee." Was all Summer said, placing two mugs on the workbench. "And a cereal bar."
The second statement sounded a little more unsure and Morty could've sworn he saw Rick's jaw clench for a second.
"Gimmie coffee." Rick said, making grabby hands, still lying on the floor.
"Water first." Summer replied, handing him the larger of the two mugs.
Rick pouted a little but as soon as the mug was in his hands he drank thirstily, finishing the whole thing in one go.
"You want more?" Summer asked, taking the mug, but he just shook his head quietly.
"Okay," Morty cleared his throat when his voice came out a little shaky. "drink this."
He handed Rick the red 'get sober' vial and Rick chugged it obediently, making a face. "Tastes like– like shit." He offered.
While he seemed a little calmer after the water and serum, his eyes were still unfocused and his voice sounded thick, like his tongue didn't fit in his mouth properly, hints of his accent were slipping through too.
"Did you- are you on drugs r-right now?" Morty asked, reaching for the green vial of serum.
"Maybe." Rick mumbled. His eyelids were starting to droop a little and he curled up more comfortably on the floor.
"Hey, Rick, don't go to sleep okay? What did you take?" Summer asked, crouching down next to him, shaking him a little. He groaned. "Come on, we just have to make sure you're not overdosing and then you can sleep. Maybe not on the floor."
"'M not overdosing." Rick grumbled.
"What did you take?"
"I dunno. Just some random alien drugs I found i-in my pocket." He said dismissively with a burp. "Actually one of 'em was probably adderall. Look at me bein' all responsible an-and takin' my meds n' shit."
He of course immediately showed his 'responsibilty' by gagging and then throwing up on the floor.
Morty winced, reaching for the purple device again while Summer tried to coax him into drinking the green liquid, frowning deeply.
Finally Rick gave in, sipping from the small vial, and almost instantly his eyes began to clear up a little bit.
"Why'd I make these work so well?" He groaned. Then, "My head is killing me, I want coffee."
Summer passed him the second mug and he gestured toward the hangover serum, which Morty promptly passed to him and Rick poured it in his coffee.
He gulped down half the coffee and sighed, wiping his mouth with his already rather dirty sleeve. "Fuck, that's better."
He downed the rest of it and placed the mug on the ground, getting to his feet shakily. He swayed and nearly fell, leaning onto the wall to steady himself as the dizzy spell passed, and then stretched, his back cracking loudly.
He took a few wobbly steps towards the door but Summer blocked the way.
"Fuck– fuck off Summer I gotta– I'm gonna go take a nap."
"Could you maybe eat something first?" She asked firmly, holding up the cereal bar.
"No."
Rick tried to sidestep her but she blocked the way again.
"Summer, don't fucking piss me off right now, I'm serious."
She stood her ground. "Just eat the cereal bar, grandpa Rick. Please."
"Summer, for fuck's sake, I said no!"
"Grandpa," She sighed, the arm holding the bar dropping defeatedly back down to her side. "Do you have an eating disorder?"
The garage was deathly quiet for a second.
"Wha-What?! I'm not a teenage girl in a f-f-f– goddamn netflix drama, Summer." Rick snarled. "What the fuck kinda question is that?"
He gestured wildly, taking another step forwards, which quickly seemed to be the wrong option as a sudden wave of dizziness hit him hard, making him almost loose his balance. He blindly tried to grab onto the back of his chair somewhere behind him, but missed and fell on his ass.
"Rick!" Morty and Summer both rushed to his side, Morty's eyes beginning to well up a little from all the stress of the day.
"I'm fine, don't– don't fucking touch me." He said, shaking Summer's hand off his shoulder, which caused another wave of nausea to hit.
"Please eat this." Summer said nervously, voice shaking as she pushed the cereal bar into his left hand, his right one gripping at his hair.
"Summer, I promise you if I eat that shit right now I'm gonna throw the fuck up."
"Please?" Morty pouted, eyes big and teary.
All it took was one look at him, and with only a brief moment of hesitation Rick snatched the cereal bar from Summer, muttering angrily under his breath.
Morty only caught "Me cago en la puta." and "Maldito cabrón." which he more or less understood, more familiar with swear words than any other words in the Spanish language.
Rick peeled away the wrapper slowly with unsteady hands and took a small bite.
Morty and Summer watched in silence, not wanting to discourage him by saying the wrong thing—which with Rick could be anything—as Rick uncomfortably ate the cereal bar.
"There you fucking go." He said weakly, Throwing the now empty wrapper at Summer, but missing as it was too light to travel more than a couple centimetres, landing somewhere by his feet.
"Thank you." Summer almost whispered.
They sat in silence for a while, Morty sniffling and rubbing at his eyes and Summer shuffling a bit closer to him for both of their comfort.
Rick was sitting with his knees losely bent and his head braced in his hands, trying to overcome another hit of nausea.
He wouldn't exactly say he tried super hard to keep the cereal bar down, but it wasn't deliberate when he vomited it down the front of his shirt.
"Oh! Aw jeez..." Morty winced.
"I did warn you."
"In our defense, you had every reason to be lying to us."
"Fuck you, Summer." It sounded weak even to his own ears.
She sighed softly.
"Morty, get his shirt off. Do you have pijamas or do you sleep in jeans and a lab coat?"
"Jeans an-and a lab coat."
"...I was joking, but okay." Summer said, flipping the switch that opened Rick's garage closet and grabbing one of his sets of identical outfits.
Rick squirmed, making noises of complaint as Morty tried to take off his current shirt.
"Rick– stay still, you have vomit on your clothes."
"I'm not fucking two years old, Morty." He scowled. "I can change by myself."
Rick tried to sit up but wobbled and then slumped back against the wall, needing more time to recover. Morty reached for his shirt again and this time Rick let him pull it carefully up over his head without resisting. Morty took the new set of clothes from where Summer had left them on the floor next to him.
Summer wasn't looking but Morty still shielded Rick's body from sight with his own, pointedly not mentioning the raised scars and jagged, angry, red cuts littering his arms which he had already suspected would be there.
Rick shifted uncomfortably, seeming relieved when Morty didn't want to talk about it.
"Okay." Morty said, helping Rick pull on his clean lab coat too.
"I'm going to bed." Rick grumbled, not waiting for him to continue, just getting up slowly.
He felt weak and shaky and his brittle old bones weren't exactly helping out. Despite his thousands of cybernetic implants he was still human, much to his dismay, and he couldn't treat his body as badly as he did when he was 30. Not that that ever seemed to stop him, managing to still maintain the same shitty habits he'd had for years at the ripe age of 67.
He stumbled through the dining room, Morty and Summer trailing after him, not discouraged by the glare he sent their way.
As soon as he reached his room, he slumped onto his bed with a groan.
"R-rick?"
"Fuck off, Morty." He snapped into his pillow, a little muffled by it.
Morty hesitated, exchanging a glance with Summer, who shrugged.
"...Ookay, Rick. Uh, see– see you at dinner, today? maybe?'
"Don't count on it."
Summer frowned, Starting to say something, but Rick interrupted, "I'm gonna apply my room's Lock Protocols in ten seconds, so i-if you're still in here, I'm not letting you out until I'm done sleeping. A-a-and if you're standing in the doorway, you're gonna get fucking squashed in the doors."
"Whatever, Rick, fuck you too." Summer huffed, pulling Morty out of the doorway with her.
"Room, activate Sensory Protocol 2. And t-tell Summer to go fuck herself."
"Sensory Protocol 2 activated." Came the mechanical voice and a heavy metal door snapped shut. "Go fuck yourself, Summer."
Summer scoffed. "Dick." Followed by a sigh. "What are we gonna do?"
"I-I don't know." Morty admitted. "There's not much we can do if Rick won't accept help. And he won't."
"So what? We just give up on him?" Summer asked accusingly, putting her hands on her hips.
"No, Summer, J-jeez. I just– We're gonna have to get creative."
"Fuck."
---
thats it thats the end i didnt know how tf to end this but my goal wasnt to rewrite like the bible idfk it was just to put rick through shit and put completely unfair expectations on summer and mortys shoulders so that they could ALL suffer in this fic !! :3 also this is so mf long i sincerely apologise if u read all that
#i feel like all the few rnm fics ive written are set in the garage im sorry 😭#thats where rick mostly is when hes not out in other dimensions tho ig#also even tho my fics r all rick centric i cant not have my boy morty in them#i just love him too much#also obligatory birdrick mention in the start bcs theyve been on my mind#also in regards to is anyone in this house not disordered let my drop my smith sanchez family disorder hcs >:)#okayyy#so starting off strong with beth: an alcoholic like her father probably anxiety stemming from her abandonment issues and possibly depressio#next up my boy morty: anxiety also and most likely ptsd from all the shit hes experienced ik a lot of ppl hc him as autistic but i dont#possibly adhd dyslexia or dyscalculia tho or all of the above idk#oookay next up jerry: i really spend incredibly little time thinking about jerry so idk im open to hearing hcs abt him tho#wait back to beth: maybe also ocd or smth like that#okay now summer: my girl has a lot of substance abuse issues as we see and fomo but idk if anything else maybe social anxiety or smth#aaand its rick time: alcohol and drug abuse definitely ptsd for sure depression and autism possibly adhd or bpd or both#in this fic he has an ed also so that#paranoia too#and thats it i think#also going back to the topic ofautism tho#i just cannot see it with morty at all like he shows no symptoms?? i dont see them at least idk i could be wrong#i honestly see it more with beth or summer maybe#but idk#also i almost never put the accents when i write in spanish lol but i did so#vey professional of me ik#gotta let rick say cabron properly#alex says shit#rick and morty#rick sanchez#morty smith#summer smith#rick and morty fanfiction
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Me when looking for neurodivergent representation in fiction:
Also me when I come across "all neurodivergent people do X" posts/videos/etc.:
When I tell you, this shit is infuriating...
#neurodivergent#neurodiversity#my life#don't get me wrong I'm GLAD that there are better representations of autism and adhd than there used to be#but I HATE when I'm looking for representations of NOT JUST THOSE TWO TYPES#and that's ALL I GET IN RETURN#I want some fucking HSP rep!#I want some allistic hyperlexia rep! (though I doubt that's happening any time soon)#I want more dysgeographic rep! (it barely exists! I can think of one canon!character off the top of my head!)#I want well done CPTSD rep!#I want decent rep of neurotypes I don't even have and I want it all to be acknowledged as neurodivergent!#Hell- Green Lantern Jessica Cruz should be recommended as neurodivergent rep because of her anxiety!#but because of the obnoxious bs of people acting like 'neurodivergent = ONLY autism/adhd' she'll never come up!#it's infuriating!!!#uuuuugggggghhhhhhhh
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Say what it is in the tags if you're comfortable :)
#Neurodivergent#(Your own definition#you can choose whether you want to include anxiety/depression/PTSD etc.)#autism#adhd#bpd#audhd#Reposting this to have a 1 week time limit instead of 1 day for a bigger sample size#Last time we had like 2% neurotypical loll#polls#writers on tumblr#neurodiversity#neurodivergence#ptsd#depression#anxiety
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Is there a 300 page essay about Murderbot's armor (specifically the opaque helmet) as a not-so-subtle metaphor for masking in a clearly neurodivergent character already? Because I need it.
The way Murderbot is unvoluntarily without its opaque armor in All System Red in front of the crew (i.e. unmasking) and appears surprised at its own strong facial expressions and other people's reaction to it? The vulnerability that comes with that and how Murderbot spends pretty much the rest of the book wearing or actively missing its armor which keeps it safe from the mortifying ordeal of being known (yet sometimes other characters suggest it might help for it to not opacify the helmet in order for others to see it as a person and to trust it (and in the end idk if it would have achieved the rewards of being loved by its humans and have had its needs met if it hadn't unmasked in this relatively safe environment sometimes)).
Also there's the whole avoiding-looking-directly-at-people-and-using-drones-instead thing which Murderbot usually hides using the opaque helmet, but whenever it doesn't have that people notice it and many react negatively/confused. I think that's a whole neurodivergent-applicable situation in and of itself? Like damn
And then Mensah encourages Murderbot not to wear armor on Preservation station since it would not need it there, Murderbot is hesitant but ends up not wearing any (like 4 books later when we finally get to that bridge) (going for the comfortable clothes it chose for itself instead, with very strong feelings about the whole being able to make choices thing that I cannot go into further at this point because I would absolutely end up BITING SOMETHING OR SOMEONE).
And I'm not going to advocate for unmasking all the time in any setting because hell no, sometimes it absolutely sucks and people are irritated by Murderbot's now visible quirks and are afraid of what they don't know, but many GET TO KNOW Murderbot better and because there are other people that make sure Murderbot is safe and respected and are willing to get people fired for it if they disrespect it (Pin-Lee my beloved) Murderbot can experiment with this situation without being exiled to some abonded part of a planet and other people are forced to spend enough time around ot to learn to respect it and even like it. I just....... It must be so scary and Murderbot is handling so much at once and in this essay I will
PS sorry this is a disorganized mess but so am I and I have so many Thoughts and even more Emotions and so little patience.
#murderbot#the murderbot diaries#all systems red#murderbot diaries#𓄿#i sincerely hope this post isn't insensitive because i feel like the autism vibes are strong with murderbot and i am not diagnosed with tha#but i have adhd and a fun mix of anxiety and depression#and i've been deepdiving into autism research to help get one of my closest friends diagnosed (not possible at the moment)#and i relate so strongly in many ways and i dont know if its just that adhd and autism can overlap heavily#or my personal cocktail of adhd anxiety depression etc#or if i am on the spectrum somewhere myself#in any case i feel very strong solidarity and i hope i am not overstepping#but the main point here is the masking and that is DEFINITELY something ive been struggling with a lot recently#hence the strong emotions lol#i dont like to unmask. it sucks. but it can be so worth it.#and i am practicing and learning and trying my best#i feel like this fun sideblog for my scifi hyperfixations is quickly turning into a mess of therapy ramblings for myself#maybe thats because i love these books particularly BECAUSE i relate so strongly to these characters#in ways that are not NormalTM. and surprising for me#and ways that really help me figure out who i am and why dealing sith other people is so difficult for me#welp nevermind#all hail murderbot i guess
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me as a kid: i have all these problems
every adult around me: you're not old enough to know what's wrong with you, you're fine
me as an adult: i still have all these problems
my doctors after i finally got the opportunity to choose them myself: oh my fucking god why have you never gotten help for all these problems. you should have seen me 10 years ago
#problems i have finally gotten help for that i was told i was not old enough to know about:#AMPS (was told it was anxiety and then when i kept coming back they said it was fibro Quite Literally just to get me to shut up)#(like the doc i just saw literally said 'they diagnose fibromyalgia here when they dont know what the problem is but dont feel like testing)#multiple food allergies (was also told the stomach pain and vomiting was anxiety)#seborrheic dermatitis (i was told 'youre just stressed thats why you have a rash')#(which- if im so stressed my skin is literally dying MAYBE I STILL NEED HELP?????????)#autism and adhd (my father knew! but refused to get me assessed bc if i dont have a diagnosis theres no problem right :)#anxiety disorder (oh so when I'm in pain i DO have anxiety but when i say i have anxiety I'm overreacting okay)#dyscalculia and possibly dyslexia ('you just need to try harder' I've asked for a tutor five times)#some of my doctors don't actually believe me about some of these problems BECAUSE i have no records from when i was a kid#they're like 'it just popped up at 18? seems suspicious......' like I WASN'T ALLOWED TO GO TO THE DOCTOR'S UNTIL THEN#there's definitely more but I'm still mad abt it#i might not be in a wheelchair Almost All The Time if i had gotten help BEFORE i lost half the feeling in my legs#i KNEW the fibro was a BS diagnosis#i tried to get assessed for autism at 16 and was told i have schizotypal personality disorder instead with literally zero testing#like my psych just refused to allow me to get tested for autism she was like 'no you have spd i Just Know'#same psych that said there was zero way i had anything like DID because my symptoms didn't present Exactly like the Only other#patient at the clinic with DID. i want to note that that was a 14 year old boy still being actively abused#and i was a 20 year old who was in a safe environment and had distanced myself from my abusers and stressors
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I saw this on instagram and literally thought
“tech v. me”
#like I’m smart I guess but not a savant#like can’t the payoff of the tism be a little better#instead i have a delicious little ADHD autism anxiety depression cocktail#mmm yummy#star wars#the bad batch#tbb#tech tbb#autism#actually autistic#actually adhd
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My gift for the @technoblade-gift-exchange !! i was assigned to @simplepotatofarmer who asked for dsmp rivals duo. i hope you like it Loyal!
rambling about headcanons, designs, and my process and stuff under the readmore, because i wanna talk about it but dont want the post to be super long !!
i had originally planned to not have a background and then at the last second i decided to speedrun drawing one in a few hours so um. quality difference but its fine. also unrelated but im pretty sure everything about how i draw animals and anthros makes it very obvious i used to be in the warrior cats fandom lol. anyway onto the designs!!
the gold on techno is scars from the totem at the execution, which i think is a pretty common thing for techno designs. he isnt supposed to be a piglin, but rather similar species of anthropomorphic pig. also his mane and tail fluff are naturally brown but he dyes them pink ^_^ so cool !! um. i maaayyy have forgotten the crown until i was way too far into the piece to add it. haha. oops. pretend its missing because. uuh. hes in a casual outfit. "but he still has the cape" yeah its comfy. "but dream has a mask thats not casual" dream is dream he does Not relax fully ever. see entirely intentional i would never make a mistake.
dream is an original shapeshifter species i came up with because i couldnt decide what i wanted him to be. i havent decided on a name for the species yet but i plan to make almost every solid-color or nearly solid color mcyt into this species. theyre mostly involuntary/unconscious shapeshifters. so like they change slowly over weeks or months to adapt to their surroundings, with little conscious control. basically i wanted him to be like five different things so i shoved them together lol, rabbit ears but in a pattern that looks like an axolotl, a cool tail, TOE BEANS tho you cant see them. this was actually the first time ive ever had a dream design im happy with so thats really nice.
i um. i made full use of my time lol, i spent a bit over a week on the lineart, another week on the coloring, and maybe a week and a half on rendering. unless i suddenly became shit at math(which is possible) that adds up to roughly the amount of time i had to work on it. im really proud of myself actually since i usually take a while to do art, and i wasnt sure i would be able to make something id be happy with in this amount of time. but i did! woah!! this was my first time participating in a fandom gift exchange and it was so fun, and also helped motivate me to draw more instead of getting distracted like i usually do (classic adhd moment) lol. anyway super cool!!
Loyal if u decided to read all this for some reason then again i really hope u like it!! u are so cool and i really love ur rivals duo opinions and creations so i hope u like this! i know theres been shit happening lately, i hope ur doing ok!!
#technoblade#dreamwastaken#rivals duo#dream smp#dreblr#technogiftexchange#<- thats the tag right?#also wow i think i said too many words. i dont think anyone else rambled that much about their gift. um. in my defense the only thing more#powerful than my written language learning disorder is my adhd and autism. so. yeah. lots of words.#aaaaaa i feel like how i wrote everything is so awkward. i am just a creature imitating others i have no idea how to interact with people..#hmmm. posting now before anxiety gets the better of me!#edit: wait fuck i forgot my art tag. how do i ALWAYS forget my art tag.#chara makes things
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There are four main types of Batfam fans in regard to how people interpret Bruce Wayne as a dad (/Joking. This is mostly satire and should not be taken seriously):
Fans that think Bruce is emotionally constipated and isn't the best at being a parent but still tries (Differs per person). Don't necessarily think he's absuive but thinks he can be toxic or have unhealthy expectations for the Robins. Can smell the Oldest Daughter Syndrome coming from Dick and have Family Line (By Conan Gray) as their top song on their Dick inspired playlist and Daddy Issues (By The Neighbourhood) for Jason.
Fans that choose to believe Bruce goes to therapy in their own canon. Love B:WFA. Thinks the comic can be cheesy at times and so find a balance between B:WFA Bruce and Please Go To Therapy BruceTM as their middle ground. He struggles. They advocate that Bruce is not a bad parent, he just has bad writers that seem to forget Bruce wouldn't hurt kids, especially not his own. Love the humane moments and scenes he has in BTAS and the early JL cartoons. He may not be perfect but he's not literally abusive. Whores for Bruce being able to admit when he is wrong and for Jason and Bruce reconciling. I recommend Grow As We Go by Ben Platt for this one.
A mix between the first two. Was fine-ish when Dick was younger. Didn't help him in the healthiest way but eh. Still emotionally constipated but that happened more so after Dick left and Jason died. Started getting better when Tim came back but was still closed off. Should probably go to therapy with the kids so they can drag his ass about all the things he's done that have actually affected them negatively. Understands his mistakes and is also able to admit when he's wrong, eventually. It's not easy but he starts to do better and learns to be more emotionally available. Still has to get chewed out by Alfred sometimes but definitely better than he used to be and it shows. Reconciliation is slow and gradual but progress is made for everyone involved.
The one's I personally avoid for my own sanity and wellbeing:
Think Bruce is a complete bastard and abuser. Want him to choke. Hate any and all interpretations of him. Some of which will refuse to understand how anyone could have a different interpretation. Will point out comics where, in all fairness, he is a dick but forget that characterisation can significantly differ from one series to the next, as comic characters are constantly passed around to different writers and have been for decades. Not to mention movies, shows, etc.
#Bruce Wayne#Batman#Batfam#Batdad#I'm not tagging everyone in the Batfam I can't be assed#Sorry there's like 500#Bruce has a child for every mental disorder he has#Dick is his ADHD. Jason is his C-PTSD. Tim is his Anxiety. Cass is his OCD. Damian is his Autism.#Like bro the therapist is RIGHT there#You have the money just GO#I am a mix of 2 and 3 tbh but more so 2 because he is my comfort fictional father figure. I already have a shit dad irl#I'm not dealing with it in my favourite media too#Type 4 fans scare me I lowkey see so many people like that and I'm like. If the block button wasn't free. I'd be in debt by now#I get that you saw Tom Kings work. So did I. I hate that fuck. But I personally prefer the scene of him in JL with Ace on the swings#Or the one with him playing with shape block toys with a baby whilst Supes and WW handle the questioning#Or when he hugs literally any of his kids#Or the one of him and Jason watching a movie and eating popcorn when Jason's ill. And they have the picture of them posing#Or when he cried in Flashpoint over the letter his dad left him because the little boy in him needed that#Plus any time Bruce and Clark interact as Best Friends. The Golden Age comics where they were basically Dick's gay dads 💀#But yeah. I could make a poll from this tbh.#This is a generalisation on purpose genuinely do not take it seriously#If I see ANY disclosure. It's delete and block on sight#Bruh I'm still recovering from the notes of my Fallout 4 John Hancock in a Drag Race outfit crossover post#I know it sounds like I'm being paranoid but that's because I am. You have not seen the things I have seen in my notes#You do not know of the wars I have fought of over ghoul dicks and high heels#I have seen things I can never burn from my vision. Read things I will never have the mercy of forgetting#Over silly little shitposts. Lmao. Anyway. Here. Have some food.
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