#has been this way my whole life btw

[alcego]

reasons i listen to podcast/audiobook while falling asleep: i am Unconscious before the 15min sleep timer ends

reasons i do not rawdog sleepytime: i can and will toss and turn and stare at a ceiling all night. i have tried all of the methods. i have counted my breaths up to ten thousand, forcing them to be still, and not once did i fall asleep during. get distracted and start over several times, because my brain refuses to settle?? yes. forced myself to stay stock still to encourage my limbs to grow heavy and sleep to come? yes, to no avail

but with podcast: eepy eppy nighttime hours

[canonkiller]

do you consider your self made?

[doveywovy]

06 not realizing they’re injured

unhealthy coping mechanisms/healed wrong/"it's not my blood"

------

After the last of his little brothers dies, Tobirama learns to always sense Hashirama's chakra. It's a drain on his own resources, if a trickle of one- but he starts when he's nine years old, and a trickle is a dangerous amount.

He does it anyways, and his abilities adjust around it. The relief of always knowing where Hashirama is has a massive impact on his ability to actually sleep at night. When he's twelve, he pushes himself so he can track Toka's chakra as well. Learning to divide his attention- between his brother, his cousin, and whatever task is at hand- is not easy. He gets migraines, makes mistakes. In the end he manages, and from there it's only natural to expand.

He can't manage all the Senju, but he can keep an eye out for the children. For the one civilian who reminds him of his mother, for his brother and his cousin.

And eventually, for Izuna.

That's from a different kind of paranoia. If he knows where Izuna is, it halves the threat he presents. He might not be able to keep an eye on all the Senju, but at least he knows where one of the greatest threats against them always is. He keeps a closer watch on Izuna's chakra than he does anyone but Hashirama's.

(It's easy to follow. It's distinct from the Senju, burning hot and crackling with energy, less like a fire and more like a lightning bolt. If he turns his full attention to it, which he rarely if ever does, it sends a shivering zap through his own system like static shock leaping between fingertips.)

Perhaps it was a mistake. Lumping Izuna in with his loved ones. Or perhaps the mistake was relying on the sensation of the man's chakra in the winter months, a warm fire banked compared to his own frigid nature. Perhaps allowing himself to cling to anyone's chakra at all, even Hashirama's, was the real mistake.

Regardless- he snaps into action when he wakes up to the sensation of someone's chakra sputtering out, using the Hiraishin to travel the distance- three jumps more than he's ever done before, a strain on his body that distracts him as much as the frantic feeling of chakra flaring and struggling as it's tamped back down that drives him on.

He saves Izuna. It's only after he's done it that he realizes his mistake, and by then it's too late.

[starflungwaddledee]

it's the day before my birthday, and my girlfriend surprised me with an outing to a local bird aviary/botanic gardens in the mountains!!!

this was an absolute delight for me, known bird enjoyer, and i got to have many cute and phenomenal birds perched on my head (which i loved and plushie magolor 'tolerated', on account of it being my birthday). i even got to see a nicobar pigeon, which i had never seen in person before!

they also surprised me with an early birthday present to use at the incredible mountain-top picnic spread my gf planned (😭😭) of this extraordinarily cute kirby themed liquid-glitter cup!!

and of course, in true starflung fashion i injured myself twice

once, not three minutes into the outing when my umbrella (which i only require because i'm allergic to both the sun and sunscreen) bit me, and my gf had to run to reception to get me a bandaid. later, when i just totally fkn stacked it on some loose gravel on a slope and i got the umbrella back by slamming it into the ground, along with my knees and one palm. but not the other palm, which was holding plushie magolor, who touched neither gravel nor dirt and never will while i still breathe!

[raiiny-bay]

kiddos!

(used this old render as a ref)

[cheekblush]

really starting to believe that psychic who claimed i’m cursed

[primordial0riginator]

Me, the only Ares and Nyx shipper on planet earth: 😏

[theyarebothgunshot]

.

[robinmage]

no kind of relationship will ever be as impactful as the slightly toxic slightly homoromantic hyperdependent bestfriendship you had with someone when you were like 12

[estrellazzz]

Dissociation is so protective. I do love it at times. Whatever seemed to be bothering me in the month of October or hell, even 3 days ago? It all seems like a foot note now.... drugs help speed up the mind-scrubbing process too.

[bluestjayy]

Maybe I'm just cursed 🤪

[phagodyke]

weekend melancholy is starting to kick in >~<

[tamagotchikgs]

last night i was poking around in my mouth as u do and i reached back where i had always felt this hard thing w my tongue for awhile now but was like ah maybe it's just like. my gums being inflamed in the back or smthn BUT,, no i poked that thing with my fingernail n it is a tooth that is a whole ass wisdom tooth

[astrxealis]

good morning my personality for the day is that i'm uncontrollably sobbing on the inside about ff9 and ff10

[bugmistake]

ive gotta. get it together a little bit i think. holy shit i really did not mean for the tags to get THAT long

[m00ngbin]

Sometimes I think of Chicken Little from the movie Chicken Little and cry bc he's just a kid and he's all alone and his dad is ashamed of him and he lost his mother and he gets bullied and harassed bc he's small and kind of strange and he's the only person in the world that knows that the sky is falling and when he tries to tell people they don't believe him