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#had way more to say than i thought i did
bearimba · 3 months
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lyra and kris for the character bingo !!! I always love hearing your takes on these guys :]
Two of my favorites!! I could say so much about both of them but I'll try to keep any ranting to a reasonable level :)👍✨️
Lyra:
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I love Lyra but I feel like people don't tend to push her characterization very far. Like, I genuinely do enjoy all the happy-go-lucky bubbly extroverted depictions of her! they're always super cute! but sometimes they can feel a little... flat. Again, I have nothing against such interpretations, it's just that mine is just a lil different :)
In the ✨️bearimbaverse✨️ version of HGSS, Lyra is still an incredibly cheerful and plucky girl who is constantly finding herself and trouble and has the world's biggest bleeding heart. However, she's also very nonchalant---sometimes dangerously so. Such an easygoing nature usually presents itself as unrelenting optimism, but Lyra also struggles with a lack of self-preservation, difficulty empathizing with people as easily as she does with pokemon, and standing up for herself in personal matters. Then while trying to change that, she ends up overshooting into caring way too much about helping the people around her. A huge part of her character arc even after her pokemon journey ends is learning how be considerate of both others and herself in a healthy way!
Kris:
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Kris my beloveddd :) I really can't wait until I can actually start developing her backstory because even she's not super active in my version of HGSS, she's still a skilled trainer in her own right and gets to go on ber own super cool pokemon journey!!
By HGSS, Kris's biggest issue is herself. Or to be more specific, a lack of identity and dwindling self-motivation. Being the oldest in her friend group by a few years, she always feels at least a little obligated to watch after Lyra and Ethan, and they definitely keep her on her toes with all their shenanigans. She's also super passionate about her position as one of Elm's lab assistants and plans on taking over Elm's research once he retires. Unfortunately, she's not really left with a lot of time for herself. The last time she got to be fully independent was her pokemon journey nearly seven years ago, and even then, she ended it early because she got sick of traveling. She's truly a homebody at heart---she loves her family and friends, she loves the lab, and she loves New Bark Town as a whole. It's not until Lyra and Ethan leave on their own journeys and Elm has to put a hold on research to study weird cases of premature evolution around the region *cough Team Rocket cough* that Kris is able to truly explore what she wants to do. She fixes up her old bicycle and rediscovers her love for biking, she tries making her own clothing for once instead of just mending her old stuff, she's able to figure out what she likes when she doesn't have to take other people into consideration, etc etc. She even gets a chance to lead some research herself and realizes that evolution is a far wider field than Elm focuses on, and she wants to study it all. Like, literally everything she can get her hands on. She does eventually take over Elm's lab, and instead of limiting herself to his scope, she digs into a much wider range of subjects. She's still plenty busy, but now she's busy doing what she wants instead of what's expected of her (and she does make sure to leave some free time open to just relax and be herself :) ).
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theoldkyokodied · 1 year
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Uploading all my Tomgreg art at once from the past few week before season 4 hits, who knows in what kind of mental state i'm gonna be once it does :')
#tomgreg#succession#dont even talk to me i started watching this show when i had nothing to do at work and now i watch it with averiel my good friend averiel#and we are going to watch s4 together and i feel physically ill from bein so excited#so ya thats what ive been up to... anyway. i love these idiots they desever nothing but the worst (affectionate)#im also a tomshiv lover btw. im the one who yells 'THIS IS HOW TOMSHIV CAN STILL WIN' while they are actively losing on screen#thats the kind of person i am#dont look at me (lying on the floor)#okay i was not going to say stuff in the tags and let the art speak for itself but i NEED to point out details in the wine Painting..#i put a lot of work into that one. thinly veiled metaphors and symbolism yknow..#greg is gripping the stem of the wine glass with his full fist. tom and greg are dressed in the same outfit (sock garters included)#greg look appalled but he is not doing anything about the spill. tom is fondly pouring greg more and more wine. he is doing him a favor#i colored the red wine the same way i would color blood :) oh and tom is not really touching greg#only holding the chair in place. greg is making himself look smaller than he is like usual#oh and @ the person who said that it's the inverse of the tom and nate scene i love the way you think. i did not think of that before#but god. yeah. i actually thought about the scene change from when roman uhh.. christens his office in s1. the one with the coffee machine#i always go insane at that cut. this is not exactly the same since it's more.. about emotions but yknow.. it can be.. the same...
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puppyeared · 2 years
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obsessive
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pondphuwin · 10 months
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bed friend, episode 3
middleman's love, episode 3
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edwinisms · 1 month
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it’s actually so wild to me that this fairly quirky YA type show gave both of its main characters deaths that can, in one way or another, solidly be considered hate crimes. they were both flat out murdered as a result of being A) gay and effeminate or B) brown (south asian, specifically) and you could argue whether or not those kids thought of it that way in the moment or whatever but the bottom line is that they would not have been in the situations that killed them if they weren’t of their respective minorities. like legitimately that is a ballsy choice for this kind of netflix show, let alone for the two Main Characters, and i respect it big time
#rambling#i think about this a lot#you could brush charles’ off as a hate crime by proxy since it was in response to him Stopping a hate crime#but that would be stupid. like you think what happened to him would’ve happened if he was white? doubtful#as a mixed person the way i see it is that in that moment- when he protected that pakistani kid- he went from being tolerated#by being/acting just white enough and with enough other jock traits to sort of fit in amongst them#to all at once proving to them that no- he is in fact The Other. he isn’t one of us he’s one of Them.#and as such what happened to him would’ve been a bonafide hate crime. even if they were to give an excuse like ‘he got in our way’ or ‘he#made a fool out of us’ or whatever else. even if those boys didn’t fully UNDERSTAND the racism in their own intentions/actions#it still would be. because that would not have happened to a white boy. period#anyway. genuinely fascinating choice they made with the way they presented his death- especially considering it was not#remotely similar in the comics. neither of them had the hate crime aspect going on really up til yockey’s narrative choices#so props to him. man’s got balls#dead boy detectives#charles rowland#edwin payne#edit: I will say that I don’t think the boys in edwin’s case technically murdered him nor would I call them murderers#because I can’t imagine a single one of them actually thought that ritual was gonna do anything more than make him piss himself#it was still hate-based bullying. like they still absolutely did what they did because he’s visibly effeminate and easily clickable#and all in all: gay. but when I say edwin was murdered I don’t really mean by those boys. I mean those boys dragged him into the situation#(kicking and screaming) that GOT him murdered by a demon. and he would not have been in that position if not for being gay.#I’ll say it again because last time I talked about this someone got real pissy in my inbox: I am not excusing the actions of the boys that#got him killed nor am I saying what they did wasn’t based in homophobia. i am just clarifying that they didn’t intend on killing anyone or#think whatsoever that someone getting killed was even a possibility (as opposed to charles’ killers who definitely had to have thought he#could be killed even if that might not have been the premeditated goal of every boy involved)#but the fact that edwin was ultimately intentionally killed by a demon counts as murder to me#someone killed him on purpose. that’s murder#the demon probably didn’t give a shit about this human teenager’s sexuality but regardless he ended up there for being gay.#so. just. a clarification
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humanmorph · 8 months
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i do still (occasionally) (also when keith mentions it) think about how noone really interacted with phrygian much outside of their humanoid shape much (room, place, objects etc), and when they did it usually went with a general sense of that being so strange / weird / kind of offputting. and of course part of it is that it's jokes from the cast & saying things like 'i don't want to party inside of you' are just kind of funny, i guess*, and on the other hand (watsonian) i can buy it from the characters who were raised with/under anti-branched propaganda, HOWEVER
Get over it!! Get over it!!!!! Skill‼️ Issue‼️
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i-really-like-phrogs · 5 months
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Re-design of my un-named Beetlejuice OC from back when I was thirteen
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Original Reference under the cut:
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#my art#beetlejuice#toonjuice#beetlejuice cartoon#beetlejuice fanart#beetlejuice movie#procreate#I don’t really make OC’s for fanwork anymore… but the ones I had when I was younger almost never got named 🥲#When I first made her I really really liked her- and her story was very self indulgent#Looking at it now is almost way too weird for me… (and honestly a little unintentionally homophobic???)#Basically she was one of the girls from Dante’s inferno… except she got kicked out because she only had attraction to girls#(This was BEFORE I suspected that I was a lesbian— mind you.)#Yeah but anyway she went to the Deetz/Maitland house looking for a place to stay but drove everybody crazy#She was super flamboyant- loved everything pink n fluffy- and was well meaning but did more harm than good trying to do nice things for the#She had this one sided crush on Delia??? Like musical Beej and Adam except less perverted and more flirty/sappy? I was an odd kid- okay? 🥲#Anyway… the old design didn’t really do much to show off her personality… so I ended up upheaving the whole thing#It was okay for what I knew at the time- but I know what I was trying to say then and now I have the knowledge to say it better#Also— the reason I gave her horns here is so silly.#When I was younger I was in a Christian school where I wasn’t allowed to draw witches-ghosts-demons-etc.#So even though I based her on the Dante girls… I refused to give her horns because I thought that was ‘too sinful’#I even remember having so much guilt while looking for references of the Dante workers#I couldn’t even look for more than five seconds!#Anyways… she really pushed the boundaries for me at the time and it’s fun to see how I’ve changed and grown since then.
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stottlemonk-moments · 3 months
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Stottlemonk Moments:
Monk s06ep16: "Mr. Monk Is on the Run: Part 2"
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morethanwonderful · 1 year
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Okay this topic has been haunting me for a while, because I feel like I have a wildly different perception of the Yin Tiger Tally's effects on Wei Wuxian than some other MDZS fans. Specifically, I've seen some takes that include the idea of the Yin Tiger Tally as some degree of corrupting force and/or supernatural drain on Wei Wuxian's mental health within the canon of the novel.
I really wonder if the different understandings stem from being influenced by which version of the story first sticks in your head. So! Indulge my curiosity:
Reblogs are helpful here, as I figure the answers from within my personal circle vs from the fandom as a whole will be pretty different :)
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evelynpr · 25 days
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For the character ask game can I pick toga :)
I'm gonna be very honest in these, and I might disappoint, but here it is-
My first impression - I started watching BNHA around 5 years ago? It's hard for me to remember what exactly was my first impression of Toga, but back then I really didn't care for her much. Honestly, I just found it quite problematic that the only main female villain in BNHA is an overly cute school girl who fits the "cute yandere" trop to a t when the rest of the male villains look a lot more serious and scary.
My impression now - Perfectly honest- I really only started paying attention to her because of Ochako. I was, and still am, a massive Ochako fan, and when I heard that she suddenly had a massive romantic and tragic battle and narrative with Toga after leaving the fandom for 3-4 years, I was immediately deadly curious. - Even with how much I resonate with her story and character, I generally have a big ick for blood as a whole (surprising for a very loud tgck fan I know). Right now, she's my poor desperate little baby who really really needs love and therapy (affectionate). I wish we got to see more of her regular girly side, like caring for the LOV especially Magne and Twice.
Favorite thing about that character - That her entire story is a mentally ill and queer narrative. Like I said earlier, I actually have a big ick for blood and the cutesy yandere trope. But the thing that gets me about Toga is that she is the most openly bisexual/pansexual character in the series, very clearly mentally struggling, and both thrives and suffers because of her choices and circumstances. - She's such a tragic and hopeful character that represents so many weird people like me that I can't help but be attached. She makes me want to embrace my more girly and selfish side, and screams at me that I should live my life how I want to. - I can't leave out Ochako from this part. Holy shit the themes and story about their relationship makes my heart both break and soar so bad it genuinely hurts. Save people by understanding them, helping them, listening to them. Show someone you can be selfish, that they deserve love, that she deserve a chance. It's so much it punches me to a million sobbing pieces.
Least favorite thing - For the 3rd time now...not into blood. I don't like its taste, look, and the mere thought of bleeding genuinely grosses me out. - You probably think "How in the world are you attached to her then?" well its because I understand that Toga's "blood" is also a representation of her violent tendencies and love. I see it much more as a narrative device for her character and themes.
Favorite line/scene - Shocking, but I actually have not read the manga. I can't say what my favorite scene is just yet because I want to truly witness it animated, when the time comes. - If you want an answer well, from the anime so far, it probably is when she gets her quirk awakening in MVA, or when she confesses to Izuku in the final war (mostly because that scene is so damn hilarious, tragic, and important).
Favorite interaction that character has with another - ...I mean obviously it's Ochako lmao? Every interaction is a fight of ideals and love- which suddenly morphs into a way of challenging each other- then growing into understanding and loving each other. That is. Just insane. How the fuck did BNHA's writers come up with this.
A character that I wish that character would interact with more - For the sake of my Tgck Bkdk square, I really wished for her to have interacted with Bakugou at least once. Just see how one person's violence and power was praised, while the other was abandoned and shamed. How they both have a strong squishy-faced freak they're obsessed with, and also obsessed with them, even if they don't feel like they deserve it. - Oh and, definitely more LOV random shenanigans and bonding time. I wish I was able to get more into them ngl, but I never really felt that sadly. Man...
Another character from another fandom that reminds me of that character - UHHH??? I genuinely have no idea. I am drawing at a blank I am so sorry T__T This is the firsts time I have ever been interested in this kind of character??? Really sorry-
A headcanon about that character - This is kind dark so be warned - I got this idea from a fic and now I can't stop thinking about it. Toga always wanted her love to be reciprocated or understood by someone. Anyone. I feel that she was taken advantage of and abused by horrible people in her earlier days of running away...especially since she's a young teenage girl in a cute school uniform. I am so sorry...
A song that reminds of that character - I am working on a Togachako playlist! It's about both of their characters respectively and also their story and relationship, but here's the ones about Toga specifically! - Hayloft II (THIS ANIMATIC), The Red Means I Love You (obviously lol), Butcher Vanity, Hero (Charlie Puth, mostly tgck), Pink Pony Club (Chappell Roan, early Toga)
An unpopular opinion about that character - She's not the possessive type, and she's really very open to people she loves loving other people at the same time, polymarous kind. This is probably a pretty common hc already tho since she says this repeatedly? - Her most common form of love is a very impulsive/sexual/admiration/attracted kind. You could even relate this to hypersexuality (something I struggle with) where the moment you find something you're into on someone, you body and brain genuinely go kinda out of control. I project onto her my own inability to hold and control these kinds of feelings at times, but Toga is quite the manifestation of my fears.
Favorite picture - I love it when a character's mask peels off. Toga genuinely angry, upset, and just not smiling is so fascinating and beautiful to me in a "It's okay my dear, show all of you, stop hiding" (Ochako might disagree with me on this tho, since she loves her smile lmao-)
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zeb-z · 10 months
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“Red team was so selfish looking past the cursed team like that” listen man they were thinking about it often, and had evidence they were cursed too. They were convinced they were cursed too. Bad (with Pierre’s help I’ll be honest) singlehandedly destroyed any sort of civil relations and good faith between the two teams and this shot Blue in the foot when they tried to make the case about them being cursed last minute, about trying to rig it in the cursed teams favor.
There was never a cursed team in the first place, it was all a tactic to build paranoia and that feeling of betrayal and to get them to tear eachother a part. And it worked super well! At the end, neither would listen to the other about their evidence, not with an honest open ear, not with the willingness to think the other team could be cursed. It’s not a case of ‘Red just refused to listen because they wanted to win more than they cared’ they thought they were cursed too - if they were selfish, then so were Blue in the same way.
Every time Red had tried to talk first early on, it was met with extreme violence - and with Bad consistently proving he’ll play dirty to win, they didn’t trust Blue enough to listen to them in the later game. Maybe they should have listened then. Maybe Blue have listened earlier. The game worked as intended to set them against eachother.
#link is to another post I made back when they were debating about the cursed teams in purgatory and why red couldn’t trust blue and blue#couldn’t believe red. they were both stuck#and bless Tubbo he tried. he did try. but he was just as convinced he was right as Phil at the end. it was about convincing one another#more than it was about coming together and piecing together the evidence. yknow what I mean? they all cared about it but because of tension#and they also could not trust blue. which sucks because that’s hardly Tubbo’s fault but yknow#I dunno. it’s not simple like that. it’s not a case of red blowing it off being selfish not caring. they also thought they were cursed#AGAIN I’ll say it again bad burning bridges fucked a lot of them over for when diplomacy had to win because there could not be benefit of#the doubt or good faith or any sort of trust#it’s not just cut and dry red wanted to win more or blue wanted to win more. it was complicated and had way more factors#red thought they were cursed too!! they had solid evidence for this too!!#and like. again it’s a case of both parties kinda suck purgatory sucked it was always going to be like that because the game worked as#intended#idk. blue should have listened to red early on. red should have listened to blue later on. they were never going to do that on either side#idk from Tina’s pov it’s understandable why she said what she said. but knowing the others pov and what actually went down that’s not what#happened at all yknow?#they’re all gonna be feeling the effects of ‘we killed and betrayed eachother for two weeks’ for a while to come#mcyt#qsmp#qsmp purgatory#z speaks
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😭😭
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dxxtruction · 3 months
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Another post on Armand's decisions because I need to just write down my incoherant thoughts.
I think Armand didn't care what happened with Claudia and Madeleine in the slightest, they could've ran off together or burned and he wouldn't care. Honestly, it seemed he'd been trying to get Louis to feel the same way. He always saw them as a doomed inevitability, but this can not be said the same with Louis.
Fact is there's a conflation of motivations that doesn't make a lot of sense if Armand had no intention or desire to ever save Louis. Yet maybe the point is Armand couldn't even make complete sense of his own motivations himself. He didn’t want anyone to die I don’t think, his allegiances were everywhere to the point he only really had himself. He couldn't tell Louis no, he couldn't tell the coven no either. Pulled in two directions up to the very end. He needed the coven appeased, the coven he never wanted but wouldn’t wish death upon, what he wanted was Louis, while the coven wanted him and his little family dead. Then it comes to it that he could have Louis, but at a cost that they go through with a trial. The trial he directed. So then it's about how Louis could die after a brief happiness or he could find a way to save him - through being close to the whole thing maybe. He's still directing the trial when it comes time. And to that point he may not have known what to do to save him, so just play into it. But I think he'd have still desired being a savior, cause Louis is what he really chose. He maybe legitimately just didn't know if he could be.
And, I don't think he could.
Him being powerful enough to prevent it all is an assumption we've just taken to heart because he has proven capable of a lot. I think Armand's aware of his power - he kept the coven at bay for as long as he can with it - but I think he's also aware of its limits. If thirteen bloodthirsty vampires all came after him, a lot like what had happened with Marius who was also incredibly powerful and ancient, I think he's in his mind that he couldn't take that on. Especially if he'd never desired killing anyone. It stands to also reason these limits are such that he probably couldn't have controlled the entire audience the way Lestat did. Maybe memory is being wacky and he tried as we saw, but it was Lestat who really succeeded, one upping him. Or maybe he'd just given up the hope for it and so it came as a complete surprise.
You also have to think about how beholden the laws are to the coven. Armand's been at the point where he kind of doesn't care for them, or at least he's become lenient and curious about the alternative when it comes to Louis, but the coven is founded on their principles or it wouldn't hold together. So, it's either to dissolve if Louis and Claudia, and Madeleine were to all show the laws can be broken without consequence. Or be mutiny, which is what did happen, and so if he doesn't let those happen then no one lives not even him. This is something that Armand has in mind when going through with it, I'm sure. Still plotting some way to save Louis, but he isn't powerful enough to sway the inevitable, so he figures he has to go along to at least save himself. If anything happens he wants to end up alive.
This may be the reason he needs the coven to keep existing, even though he hates it, it offers him something that's more written in stone, something guaranteed to last so long as consequences are had. It does pain him to do this but the coven was holding the keys to his very life over his head (Which I'd argue makes this whole thing a lack of a choice) and he'd rather stick to his life being miserable than die along with them. Much as Armand really wants love he'd feel safer in this 'forever' thing. I think he's being truthful when he says this.
I think it's truthful as well he was degraded with Santiago's take over, he wasn't secretly leading anything by the time the play was happening. 'The choice' was something Armand felt building he just didn't know when or how it would happen. Santiago being the one to come up with the plan in secret which included trapping Armand to join them or not seems to fit. 'we can kill you now or you can make yourself useful, your choice.' That could've happened at any moment but I think the night Madeleine is turned is probably when they confronted him. Santiago wanted control from Armand so he gets him where it hurts most, forcing a betrayal he wouldn't be able to refuse. Of course he could've tried to fight back, and he did say he could've, but of course there's just this large part of him who would love to be debased from leadership. It's sort of an easy choice to go along and keep going along, when it does debase him, he does get his love as he always wanted him for even just a short while, and ultimately he will live. I don't think he fought very hard. I don't think he found it in himself to.
I think he rides so hard on the he could not prevent it train because he never actually acted to know whether or not he really could've, adamantly believing at the time he couldn't. Coming only to regret it later that he hadn't done enough. He saw how actually easy it was to take the whole coven out when Louis did it, and knew from then on he probably could've done something. He'd rather say anything until it's true instead of be honest with what he really knows.
It may be true as well though that when this play was first conceived, and through rehearsal, he may have been of the shared opinion Claudia and Madeleine would be better out of the picture. Not for laws but selfish reasons. Which would be just another layer of sway over his choice, maybe even another reason why he took the role in it that he did. It was personal to him, he felt Claudia was a lot to blame for things turning out like this. So if he couldn't say no to it, at least he'll exact his little revenge for how Claudia had to go and ruin everything. But again I don't think he actually cared so long as neither of them were being disruptive to his life. Awful thing is he probably thought up till it was too late that they would be. If he really could've prevented anything it was to not let his own spite rule him so much, maybe then he would've prevented a whole lot more.
Now clearly none of this is justified, there was a heavy amount of coercion but I think Armand is very much to be held responsible for what went on in Paris, and his own actions to take part in this as closely as he had were deplorable. His inaction culpable. He's responsible for all the lies and manipulation that took place as a part of this too. And thereafter.
Anyway stay away from cults.
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sea-buns · 11 months
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Holy fuck, man. What a trip Fearne has been on, huh?
You tell her how grateful you are to have her in your life, you flatter her, you tell her you need her, that you have to do this together. You have her make a promise that has this woman, born of chaos and fey, agreeing through shaking hands and a trembling voice.
You make her deceive your friends; you make her follow where they cannot know; you make her help you into this contraption; you make her feed this thing into you despite the fact that you both have been warned extensively of the risks. You make her watch you crumble and splinter and shatter and fracture and burst and implode. You make her watch you die, over and over and over and over, for a minute in agonizing bullet time.
You make her do all these things, because when she tries to back out, when she tries to not be the one who let you do this—how could you do this—
you tell her, "YOU PROMISED."
Because if there's one thing you know, it's that the fey do not break a promise.
#cant wait for her to fucking pissed for a very long time. shes really packing the entire human experience in a very short period of time.#critical role#cr spoilers#c3e77#fearne calloway#ashton greymoore#bells hells#just gonna get ahead of the um actually mfs and state that i am aware that its not confirmed that thats why ash brought up the promise#but boy howdy would it make for some great drama down the line huh?#edit: apparently i did not get ahead enough cuz ive had to turn off replies#since ppl were somehow interpreting this mini introspection piece as me infantilizing fearne??#anyway the first line is now changed to something a bit more neutral. after sleeping on it i do see how it was a bit aggressive at the top#other than that im not sure how else to reword without completely disregarding the core of the post#i might make more posts addressing this but im not sure yet. i wanna try to approach it in the best way possible.#but if it helps any the point of the post was not to say fearne had no agency. she had plenty of moments where she tilted one way or the#other. the POINT was to just shine some light on the emotional pressure she had been put under.#hasnt your friend ever asked you to keep a secret or promise that felt wrong or unsafe or made you anxious?#it has nothing to do with the amount of agency she had. ash wasnt holding a knife to her throat and forcing her to follow against her will#all i was trying to do was take this detail about his reminder of the promise that i thought was interesting and have some fun writing an#overview of the kinda stress she was under BEFORE theyd reached that scene. this entire ep was everyone discussing how grateful they were#for this family theyd made. and while im not saying ash was PURPOSELY emotionally manipulating fearne..#there is a level of unintentional manipulation when you pair the severity of his request with the convo theyd had 2 seconds prior#as well as the desperate need they all have to save each other NO MATTER WHAT.#ash was giving incredibly strong energy of a friend who peer pressures you into helping them do something that you know in your gut WILL#cause problems. hes a fucked up guy. theyre all fucked up guys. even if he didnt mean to “force” her into anything the pressure was THERE.#<- i feel like all of this overall gets my message across. i think maybe ill clean it up later into its own post.#im gonna try not to rush myself to get it done tho.#im under no obligation to explain myself. especially when ppl approach the misunderstanding by being rude af. but i do think it CAN#be clarified so id at least like to try to some degree
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seaweedstarshine · 3 months
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Thinking about the convolution of Eleventh Doctor's expressions of love for River Song in Season 7B. He does not trust Clara. He is utterly (wrongly) convinced that he and Clara are playing a grand manipulative game together. “What are you, eh?! A trick? A trap?!!”
So naturally, the last thing he should do in this game is to clue his opponent in on something that could be used to hurt him. Something like River, so painfully near the end of their time together, whose data ghost he can always see, who “it would hurt too much” to acknowledge. He can't let Clara know of the loss which constantly floods his senses; (“You are always here to me. And I always listen, and I can always see you,” he professes, once Clara has vanished into his timestream).
And yet. River fills his every moment (irregardless of any sneaking out for dates with increasingly-young Rivers while Clara is asleep like he did while the Ponds slept, which would explain his absence when the TARDIS is hiding Clara's bedroom). Even though it's not strategic, he can’t help but tell Clara about her. The best defense he can manage is to phrase it as if River isn’t as important to him as she is. Not only is avoiding her first name in his grief; he's also completely avoiding pronouns; which seems extreme given that he's still mentioning her as often as: “Oh yeah, of course he has! Professor Song! Sorry, it's just I never realized you were a woman.”
Leave out the emotion — leave out the details — don't show the cracks in the armor — play the part — win the game.
“Well, there's no point now. We're about to die. JUST TELL ME WHO YOU ARE.”
#I mean we KNOW that the doctor immediately started pouring his hearts out to Clara as soon as NotD ended <3#Clara tells the war doctor “he's always talking about the day he did it” okay so he's always talking about it starting after the prev ep#eleventh doctor#river song#clara oswald#words by seaweed#yeah I know the implication in Name of the Doctor is that eleven is two-timing them / worried abt Clara being jealous. which. eh. maybe.#but I like this better. also both things can be true if we want them to be#eleven is in SUCH a bad way in Season 7B too he needs to be held#“I thought it would hurt too much and I was right” ever think about how Clara was there for in the deepest moments of his grief?#whether his sad victorian cloud… on the Last Day… or on the day he was finally able to say Rivers name. he thought it would hurt too much#Tia made a really insightful post recently about how eleven can’t speak rivers name when she's gone and like. god. yeah.#it also made me think about. who would he even talk to River about? if he could? after years on a cloud drowning in her present nonpresence#ever think how if HoRS had happened before Hell Bent he never could've dealt with it and coulda broke the universe for River instead#Series 9 was a continuation/escelation of eleven's (and next twelve's) “he hates endings” - endings for Amy and Rory. for River. for Clara.#he hit rock bottom. and then Clara saved him#“You said memories become stories when we forget them. Maybe some of them become Songs.”#thank you Clara <3#one episode later:#“When the wind stands fair and the night is perfect when you least expect it but always when you need it the most- there is a Song.”#bc this is NOT to undervalue the Doctor's love for Clara he has a Duty of Care she's more Breakable than him (also than river!)#but it can it really be a coincidence? bc he is talking abt river in the second one. unless Moffat is obsessed with Song imagery? I MEAN
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storywestistrash · 4 days
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i am actually so tired of the way westerners treat eastern europeans
#fair warning for. a very very long ramble and rant in the tags. apologies#westerner or russian. no other option#westerner because the only thought they ever have is 'but they had universal housing so if you oppose ussr you oppose that'#(which is stupid becuse you can believe in that WITHOUT WANTING LIKE 6 COUNTRIES TO BE FORCED TO BE RULED OVER BY RUSSIA)#(SORRY FOR WANTING TO LIVE IN MY COUNTRY WITH MY HISTORY AND MY CULTURE AND NOT RUSSIA!!) (poland was a sattelite state but GOD)#or russian because they have a victim complex and are convinced that they deserve to rule over the entire damn world#'well you had universal housing so you had it easy' right yeah. okay. forget about like. everything else that happened#to eastern europeans during that time#forget about the things that are STILL issues all these years later not only in poland but like the more eastern countries too#its not about. the fact that the houses 'didnt have 3 bedrooms and a jacuzzi' in them. you DUMB SACK OF SHIT#god sorry. sorry. i also know so very little but like god damn i fucking live here. i didnt sit thru all that modern history#for some dumbfuck to say that 'ohhh only rich and american middle class people are happy the ussr was dissolved'#'oooh the dissolving of the ussr was illegal and the countries within it actually liked being there'#im just so fucking tired man i need to. i need to start killing people#and this is all not to mention that theyll say this stupid shit and then deny eastern europeans the things they actually did that were good#FUCK french people for trying to claim maria skłodowska. fuck americans for trying to claim the witcher as their own fantasy world#fuck the way the west is allowed to claim and destroy eastern european culture without any consequence because we dont matter enough#vaguely related but ill throw this in here since anyone finding it is unlikely and im scared of having this opinion#i think one underappreciated aspect of DE (which might be underappreciated because its not actually there and im stupid)#is that its pro-communist while still also giving some criticism to how it was handled and acknowledging that its still not perfect#which makes the writers much better communists than any self-proclaimed one ive ever met in my life who just worships the idea#perhaps its because the writers of the game were not white upper middle-class americans living in the suburbs. among other things#idk de is a game for people far smarter than me and i only played it once and im sure anyone who played it well can clock me as a bad perso#horrible horrible person even which is why im scared of mentioning it. but its an interesting thing. to me#the main thing is that im just not. im not far left enough i suppose. i agree communism in theory is a great idea. as far as i know it#(which isnt very far)#but chances of implementing it correctly in a way that doesnt take away from peoples happiness in other areas is. low. very low#i wrote a short essay about how utopias are inherently contradictory ideas once it wasnt very deep or good but like#you cant have universal happiness without restricting certain freedoms. and when those freedoms are resticted not everyone#will be happy. and then theyre unhappy they will have to be somehow removed or ignored
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