#guys it WE HAD to animate a scene where it looks Jotaro is about to kiss kakyoin!

[ang3lv0mit333]

I still will forever believe the animators for the sdc ova secretly wanted kakyoin and Jotaro together because wtf did they mean by this

[henrysglock]

[Lumax voice] Turn Around, Look At What You See! In Their Face...

(If you couldn't already tell: I have finally lost all my marbles.)

I'm sure this has occurred to other people by now, but if El's memories leading up to the 4.07 monologue are ripped directly from Brenner's (<- slayful Nat post, required viewing), and she runs in to see One killing Two...then doesn't it stand to reason that that is what Brenner saw when he ran into the Rainbow Room in 1979?

Now before anyone hops in to correct me: There's definitely a version of things where Brenner finds El alone in the rainbow room after the massacre. That's not in question. We all know that happened at some point.

(Regardless of the manner of death...no broken bones or gouged eyes...okay!)

However, as I'm sure we're all aware...these guys are different guys.

(This detail has been beaten into the ground but always bears repeating)

So, what is in question is what close-up Brenner saw when he ran into the Rainbow Room.

Those duplicate memories appear to belong to close-up Brenner:

i.e. not the Brenner who runs in and sees El at the start of 4.08. (This isn't to say that that Brenner doesn't have those memories or similar ones, but he's not the Brenner whose memories are being featured. Begone, thot.)

So, arguably, if El has close-up Brenner's memories...then she should be running in and seeing what he saw, no?

So what did he see? Someone just slightly shorter than him, who walked close enough to warrant a tight shot.

That POV (as has been discussed ad nauseam by many) is far too tall to be any version of El:

But it is about the right height for someone a few inches shorter than Brenner...something like:

So, tl;dr: I want to play a clip for you.

I love choreography and camera work. That's art right there.

However, that video doesn't include the subtitling that accompanies the visuals that link El finding One to Brenner finding El:

Now, it's difficult to compare anything after this point (though not impossible, can't keep a south Wisconsin boy down. I will be using them for comparisons later)...because of course that's when weird, random blood starts appearing:

Hence, the clock is visibly frozen after that point:

This smacks, to me, of the same kind of shit that happened with 004 when the kids were bullying El—Scenes that never actually happened in the real past being spliced into a tape that cuts off and then picks back up like no time had passed/nothing had been spliced in. It makes more sense if you read the post I linked, since the video in that post makes my point clearly.

< TANGENTIALLY RELATED >

The anime nerd in me is tempted to liken this whole deal ^ to JJBA/DIO's time-stopping stand "The World" in...that's right...Stardust Crusaders, wherein DIO pause time for everyone but himself, which I'm certain others have done as well.

Tbqh...I'm still here:

Specifically a reference to The World/DIO vs Star Platium/Jotaro, both of which are time-stopping stands...(Much to think about irt Jotaro/Star Platinum developing time-stopping powers later on in terms of El, sure, but also in terms of "Everything was hard for [One]...He walked in here, and it was like something had changed. He told me he had figured it out.").

[Distant screaming as I'm forcefully prevented from going on a "Stardust Spider-Stardust Crusaders-Dio Brando-Joestar Family-Dio's Bone-Green Baby-Green, Green Grass of Home" tangent in this post...and don't get me started on DIO's regen healing/vampirism from the ancient stone mask...don't get me started on King Crimson and Golden Experience Requiem either...]

Not to mention the DIO reference with One linking this scene to (you guessed it) Edward Munson:

Edward Creel proven once again, but this time it's via goddamn JJBA and Brenner fuckery. (And yes, yes, I know about DIO the band. This ain't about her. Things can have multiple meanings. It was a Choice to associate Henward with DIO and Eddie with DIO. I rest my case.)

< ANYWAY, TANGENTS ASIDE >

As I said earlier, close-up Brenner is shot at a distance baby El could never have achieved. She passes out on the far side of the room, entirely too far away to have been anywhere near close enough for a close-up of Brenner's face, height aside.

However, ignoring the blood fuckery and disappearing gate cracks:

Some-One else has enough energy left to walk towards the doors. All the way over, in fact. So while those close-up shots are 100% out of range for post-gate baby El, they're very much in-range for 3:46 PM One.

Tl;dr: It's entirely possible, if not likely (based on the choreography and camera-work in these scenes) that close-up/angry Brenner was addressing One rather than baby El.

[jotatetsuken]

I posted 2,515 times in 2022

That's 2,510 more posts than 2021!

889 posts created (35%)

1,626 posts reblogged (65%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@jotatetsuken

@mrskodzuken

@hyeque

@romiyaro

I tagged 2,301 of my posts in 2022

Only 9% of my posts had no tags

#musings of an extrovert - 575 posts

#talk to aisha - 448 posts

#shyna bonds with moots - 409 posts

#icymi from aisha ♥️ - 247 posts

#shyna selfrbs - 232 posts

#shyna recs - 155 posts

#shyna rants - 151 posts

#i got mail 🖋 - 111 posts

#aisha stop breaking the queue - 102 posts

#jotaro kujo - 98 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#and able to focus intently on your goals. you fight to overcome obstacles and you don't give up easily. you probably have a mean competitiv

I sent 1 gift in 2022

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

singing in the rain

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153 notes - Posted May 16, 2022

#4

Jotaro Kujo Valentine’s Drabble

Prompts: “I need just one date.” “You think you can woo me with just one date?” “Absolutely.”

Thank you so much @creativepromptsforwriting for these lovely prompts <;3 @creativepromptfills it’s okay to reblog ^_^

Features: Jotaro Kujo x Reader

Scenario: An AU where Joseph, Avdol, Polnareff, Kakyoin, and Jotaro meet the reader in Japan and complete different missions before setting off on their biggest mission in Egypt. Also, Jotaro, Kakyoin, and the reader are adults here (of Polnareff’s age)

Warning: Suggestive scenes (if you're a minor and/or uncomfortable, best to stay away, or block #shyna suggestives :D), mention of injury and loss of blood, Jotaro being a teeny bit of OOC, maybe?

A/N: Happy Valentine's Day, lovelies <3 I didn't realize that Jotaro's birthday had an official date according to some websites. Also, he being my current anime boyfriend has gotten me to dream about him in my subconscious. Gaah, I love this guy. Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day and Happy belated birthday, JoJo Baby <33

Number of words: 991 ( lol it was supposed to be a drabble, oh well idc it is a Drabble xD)

Taglist: @saltyvanilla @akaashi-todorki @pencilpoked-heart @tiddieluvr @quirrrky @fuwushiguro @kagejima @ofallthingswhythis

Let me know here if you want to join my tag list for future posts, and also, for suggestions (for AUs, characters as per the character rules) and feedback regarding my writing :D

Song: Harleys in Hawaii by Katy Perry

Joseph turns to Jotaro and me and asks, “Jotaro, (Y/N), what about you guys? How much money do you have with you?” Polnareff taunted us with a smirk, “Yeah, how much do you have? Kakyoin has 85 Singapore Dollars and I have 90.”Jotaro and I smirked back with him replying, “Ah, well, I still have 2000 Singapore Dollars.” I continued, saying, “and I have 3000 Singapore Dollars. So, guess who's going to have dinner in a fancy restaurant now?”

I glance at Jotaro, who nods and lightly chuckles along with me. Polnareff's eyes widen in shock. Avdol drags him along, saying, “Now, now, let them rest. They fought the most, after all.” We laughed as they were walking away, much to their chagrin, and as Jotaro looked in the other direction, Avdol gave a knowing smile and a thumbs up, reminding me as to why I needed to make the most of this.

When Jotaro and I first met through Avdol, our personalities were too opposite for us to understand each other. We'd argue for hours on end, even when we were forced to live as roommates. But, after our first mission together, when we went back to our hotel rooms, it's safe to say that Avdol and Joseph could hear a plethora of moans, groans, and grunts coming from our room.

What started as a way of relieving stress for us, became a means of expressing that we were getting addicted and accustomed to each other's touch, voices, and presence. It definitely seemed like a toxic way of bonding, but with us finding it difficult to get along initially, it definitely seemed like the best way out. However, on the last mission, before we set out to Singapore on our way to Egypt, a sword pierced through my stomach, causing me to lose a lot of blood. I remember before closing my eyes, that Jotaro was the first person to approach me and pick me up.

When I opened my eyes, I realized we were in the hospital, and the operation was successful and I was going to recover in a week. I was in the room with Jotaro beside me and holding my hand. “You’re awake,” he replies with a smile on his face and I noticed his eyes were baggy and the tears had dried off his cheeks. I smile at him and reply softly, “hi.” He approaches me, holds my head, and places a chaste kiss on my lips. When we pull away from the kiss, he tells me, “okay, Ms. (F/N) (L/N), as soon as you get out of the hospital, we’re going on a date okay?”

I was flabbergasted by his response and I said, “I didn’t know Mr. Jotaro Kujo can be open about his feelings. Since when did that happen?” He facepalms and replies, “Yare yare, since I thought I was going to lose you, woman. You scared me.” I chuckle, perch myself up with my elbows and I respond, “Okay then, mister. A date, you say?” He nods in agreement and smiles, “I just need one date.” I raise my eyebrow at him and ask him, “You think you can woo me with one date?” He brings his face closer to mine, kisses my forehead, and replies, “absolutely.”

As Jotaro looked in my direction, he cupped my cheek with one of his hands and asked, “Okay, so (F/N) where do you want to eat?” while caressing my cheek. As a tint of blush appears on my cheeks, I shrugged and replied, “well, there's this steak restaurant 10 minutes away. Want to walk there?” Jotaro smirked and replied, “I have a better idea,” and he pulls me to a corner of the street where there was a Harley Davidson CVO Road Glide in front of us. My mouth opens wide and my eyes widen as I turn to him and ask, “Jotaro, how, how did you get this? When did you get this?” He heaves a sigh and replies, “ah well, I asked the old man for some money,” his eyes looking down on the ground.

I put my arms around him, tilt my head to the left and ask him softly, “Jotaro, what did you tell Joseph?” He takes off his cap and ruffles his hair, replying,“ yare, yare, how does it matter? I told him that I wanted to...” his voice trailing into the air as he looks in another direction so as to hide the tint of blush that appeared on his cheeks, “take you out on a date.” My eyes widen as I look at him and tell him, “oh, it's funny because I was asking Avdol's advice on the same thing,” and I chuckle while slightly biting my bottom lip. Both of us look at each other and laugh. Then he put his cap back up and said, “so both of them are helping us. Do they know?”

I replied with another shrug, “I don’t know. But if that's the case, why don't we make the most of it? We could go to an aquarium, explore it, have a nice dinner at the steak restaurant, and go back to the room and watch a movie. It's Valentine's Day, after all.” Jotaro then clicks his tongue, responding, “The date was supposed to be my idea.” He then picks me up, gives me the helmet, puts me behind him, and sits on the Harley as he replies, “However, I’m glad that you’re alive and with me. That is something I wouldn’t trade for anything in this world.” As I put my helmet and put my arms around my waist, and place my chin on his shoulder, I say with a smile, “Happy Valentine’s Day, JoJo.” He then smiles as he starts the motorcycle, with the biggest smile I think I’ve ever seen, and softly replies, “Happy Valentine’s Day, baby.” I guess he did woo me before our first date began.

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161 notes - Posted February 14, 2022

#3

'tis the damn season

features: hajime iwaizumi x gn!reader (no pronouns used, written in 2nd person)

submission for: @woahsamu’s  “It's Always Been You” Collab  | song: ’tis the damn season - taylor swift | type of writing: oneshot | trope: slice of life, exes to lovers | wc: 2530

summary: when you come back to japan for the holiday season, while walking along the sidewalk enjoying the snow, a chance encounter with your ex reminds you how much you miss and still love him.

content warnings: partial haikyuu timeskip spoilers, suggestive themes, hurt/comfort, talks of the breakup, talks of commitment-phobia, the reader's being called baby, love

beta reading: @mxonigirimiya @portfolio-of-dreams @mrskenmakozume (ily all thank you so much <333) | networks: @hanayanetwork @tokyometronetwork

(taglist form / library account, turn on notifications to be updated) (taglist in next rb)

a/n: when i first chartered my list of fics i was going to write for tumblr, i had a fleeting idea for this song along with iwa, and when the collab came into existence, i knew what i had to do: bring the idea to fruition. taylor swift's one of my favs (y'all know this lol), so it's no surprise that my writing's based on one of her songs. plus, I thought of creating a moodboard instead of the usual banner. also, this is based on a two-year relationship i'd had with my ex in uni before i left for the states and he decided to stay in india and prepare for civil services exam. as always, likes, reblogs, and comments, especially reblogs are appreciated.

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176 notes - Posted June 23, 2022

#2

...That Wears the Crown ( A Royalty AU Collab)

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247 notes - Posted April 10, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Can I request for I want a baby prank with Guren Ichinose??? Ive been dreaming about that guy a lot recently <333

Awww sure thing Ro!!!! Guren's such a dreamy boy <3333 This gif and this website helped me channel my idea with this prompt for this scenario: Them huddled by the fireplace at night after making snow angels in the fresh snow. Oh and since it's been a while since I've watched Owari no Seraph, I'm sorry if this doesn't come out well. Oh and as a bonus, I thought of the song, Sweater Weather while writing this :D Anyway, let’s do thissss!

When we tell Guren Ichinose that we “want a baby”:

Warning: suggestive content <3, minors dni pleaseeee

Shyna's Seiyuu Birthday Celebration

He then brings his hand forward and introduces himself, “I am Guren Ichinose, the lieutenant Colonel of the Japanese Imperial Demon Army. I present to you two options: strive to live a normal life and risk being a target all over again,” then shrugs his shoulders and continue, “or you could join me and we could exterminate them together. You’ll be under my protection, I promise.” You bite your lower lip, pondering about the offer that was just presented to you. You weren’t someone that was into fighting, let alone slapping someone. But, in this cruel world that you were living in, you were needing to stand up for yourself. You then put your hand forward, accepting his offer. “I am (F/N) (L/N). I accept your offer, Lieutenant Guren,” you respond with a smile.

It’d been four years since the day that Guren kept you warm and safe from your vampiric partner, whom you'd run away from. You were working hard to join the Vampire Extermination Unit, but to no avail. It's not that you were weak. Oh, you certainly were not like the person Guren saw then. Lost, frail and having nowhere to go. You'd become stronger and smarter in your own right, being able to wield a sword faster than any of the initial candidates.

You were just too scared that you'd not be able to do your job well. Moreover, there was something that the Army didn't know: you'd begun a four year tryst with Guren. When you two weren't busy completing missions, both of you would find excuses to go to secluded places and immerse yourselves in each other.

From making out to lovemaking to doing it rough, you'd done it all. Every touch, every breath, every heartbeat. You'd made yourselves known to each other intimately.

You'd even decided to go on a couple of dates together, either by the vending machines or parks or by the fountains. His playful nature wasn't hidden from you, and he even had one of the best smiles in the entire regiment. He was also someone that valued teamwork and was strategic in his approach. It was official, you were becoming giddy over him.

But while you were slowly able to let your walls crumble down, Guren however, kept stuff to himself. While he was able to slowly reveal his past, you felt that he wasn't revealing enough. So, you came up with an idea.

You'd just come back from the hospital, where one of your friends had just given birth to a baby girl, where you'd warned your friend to run to a city that wasn't occupied by vampires yet, and promised her that you'd bring them back home safely. You'd then come outside your apartment to find Guren cladding thicker jackets on top of his uniform. He said, “Babe, let's go, it's cold outside,” with a big smile on his face. Taking you by your hand, he drags you outside into the snow, where both of you feel the chilly breeze hitting your face. Suddenly, you felt a ball of snow hitting your neck and you turn to see Guren throwing snowballs at you. You two have a good time together, chasing each other, frolicking in the snow, and making snow angels.

Later, you two come back to your apartment, take a huge blanket, sit on the couch and huddle by the fireplace. Snuggling up to him, you softly tell him with a smile, “Guren, I want a baby.”

His eyes widen in surprise as he didn't expect in the wildest of dreams for you to blurt it out. You suddenly hear his pacing heartbeat, and the moment you look into his purple eyes, he strokes your cheeks with his cold hand, asking you with a voice that seemed as calm as ever, “Are you sure that you want a baby?” You respond by nodding in agreement. You started to observe Guren even more.

“I'll think about it, okay? It's just, it's just...” You tried to complete his sentence for him, by saying, “A lot to ask for?” when he replied, “No, it's just that I've been wanting this too...” Your eyes widen in shock, “Wait, what? I thought...” He puts a finger on your lips and reply, “You thought I didn't want a baby, right? Truth be told, I wanted us to wait it out until this apocalypse is done with, because I'm scared of losing you the way I lost my family.” Your breathing hitched in your throat, with realization slowly hitting you. He's right. The war isn't over, not yet away. You nervously chuckle, “Alright, alright, chill! I was just messing around!” However, Guren's focus didn't move away from yours as he picks you up, off the blanket, from the couch in a bridal fashion. You flail your arms and legs as you protest, “Guren, babe, no....” That is when he places you on the bed, gently, as he comes on top of you and whispers, “Your wish is my command, baby....”

Finally omg! This took me a while, but I hope you enjoy it Ro! :D:D:D

265 notes - Posted February 21, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[thirillia]

Things in the OVAs that make me go brrrr:

• The entire Justice fight (it was amazing)

• Enya using Justice for eternal hotness

• the very heartfelt Avpol hug

• the way Kakyoin’s earrings defy the laws of physics

• Jotaro’s and Kakyoin’s introduction fight

• Kakyoin in general

• the way Iggy is drawn

• Iggy’s shit-eating grin

• Polnareff’s earrings not being hearts but ‘half hearted attempts’ which just makes them look like broken apples

• Avdol and Polnareff communicating through gestures and it being transcribed into subtitles

• Avdol generally being such a badass with his flames. They really made his fire look extra great

• Polnareff just not having a fleshbud and just turning from evil to baby in a second

• Kakyoin going sth like “not this guy” when they meet Pol, implying that they met

• and entire episode being named after and dedicated to Kakyoin

• Them all crying in the last scene. Yes, even Jotaro

• Joseph wearing a bandage over his shirt?

• Star Platinums long, luscious hair

• Star Platinums voice breaking while Ora-ing

• Jotaro throwing a tower at Dio

• Dio’s voice that tries but doesn’t sound threatening OR charismatic and persuasive

• the Ora’s and Muda’s that are just... off and stop halfway through because “they can’t expect us to do this for 10 seconds straight right?”

• Star Platinum flashing ass while throwing Iggy

• Jotaro’s chain jingling when he moves

• More Spider-Man Kakyoin & Joseph

• Hamon being called “Wave-energy” or sth in the subtitles and it just... not being explained. Like, fuck those who haven’t read p1 & 2 right?

• Jotaro dreaming about Phantom Blood like a true shounen jump protagonist

• the colour palette desperately trying to turn it down with earthy tones

• Polnareff & Joseph being blonde for some reason. It’s amusing

• Silver Chariot with golden accents

• Hierophant Green rocking this colour palette

• the way the English pronunciation is slightly better but it’s just not as fulfilling as hearing a good ol’ “EMURALDO SPULASHO” and similar

• Attempts to make Dio less of a slut in design but still showing him in THAT pose every episode plus his tight leather tank top

• N’Doul mentioning the other gods of prosperity but they just skip over that, except for D’Arby, elder. Not D’Arby, younger though. We ain’t got no time for video games.

• Jotaro’s magenta tank top and matching hat

• Jotaro’s wavy hair

• Avdol dying in one episode and immediately returning in the next, because we are on a budget

• the Egypt arc being the first to air and them changing the art style when animating the other half

• managing to make Jotaro look even less like a 17 year old and more like approaching 40

• Suzi Q’s hair being even fluffier

• there is a shot where, two times in two different fonts, “Gay Lord” is written as a restaurant sign. And I know it’s a surname but I wheezed

• Jotaro’s MASSIVE neck. If Dio had actually gotten to attempt to sever this GINORMOUS TREE STUMP OF A NECK he wouldn’t have succeeded

• Edit: THEY ALSO TOSSED DIO BACK INTO THE OCEAN INSTEAD OF LETTING HIM DISSOLVE IN THE SUN. BECAUSE THAT WORKED OUT SO WELL LAST TIME ????

[duhragonball]

Battle Tendency Liveblog JJBA Ch.48-52

This is the “Joseph vs. Straizo” arc, so I’ll just lead off with one of my favorite moments from the entire JoJo franchise, when Joseph furiously declares war on Straizo with tears in his eyes.   In the anime, voice actor Tomokazu Sugita delivered this with such intensity that it actually overshadowed the machine gun.

None of the dubs or translations can do it justice, including this panel from the JoJo’s Colored Adventure scanlation project.   This is a faithful translation of Joseph’s line, as far as I can tell, except they always leave off the last part: “宣戦布告だぜ!!”  In romanji, that’s: “Sensen fukokuda ze!!”    And it means  “This is war!!”  

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Last time, we saw the Joestars treating their new friend Smokey Brown, to dinner at a fancy Italian restaurant.   Some mafia jerk caused trouble, Joseph whooped his ass, and then a second mafia guy apologized and shared a rumor he recently heard: Robert Speedwagon was found dead in a Mexican riverbed, apparently killed by a Tibetan monk.  

From there, we see that Joseph immediately realizes that this must have been Straizo, and Erina suspects that it must have something to do with the Stone Masks and the battle with Dio fifty years ago.   Smokey warns Joseph to consider the source, but Joseph is pretty sure it’s credible information, since mafia guys are all about money.   I’m not sure what that has to do with whether he’s telling the truth, though.   Either way, Joseph slugs the guy for just blurting out such terrible news in front of Granny Erina.  

Now, at this point, Joseph and Erina are making all these Phantom Blood references, and Smokey has no idea what they’re talking about.   And I think seeing this panel helped me understand Smokey’s role as a viewpoint character.  When the Part began, it seemed like Smokey was sort of the narrator for the thing, which works because he’s a good viewpoint character, and he seemed to be settling in as a sidekick like Speedwagon and Poco in Part 1.   But shortly after this he just vanishes from Battle Tendency altogether, and then he shows up at the end like it’s no big deal.   I never quite understood that, and I think this is the sort of thing that fuels the “Araki forgot” memes, but it actually makes a lot of sense.  

See, Smokey’s primary function is to be the viewpoint character, specifically for the readers who missed out on Phantom Blood.    BT is a direct continuation of the previous part, in a way that none of the other JoJo parts are.   Most of the main BT cast was deeply affected by what happened in Part 1.   A few of them lived through it, and the ones that didn’t have personal connections to it.    So they constantly talk about Stone Masks and Dio without really stopping to explain any of it.   Well, if you don’t know what they’re talking about, you can take heart in the fact that Smokey doesn’t know either.   So as long as he can keep up with the story, so can the uninitiated readers.  For now, all that matters is that he’s impressed by the Joestars’ great kindness, and he’s intrigued and disturbed by these hints of a tragic past in their family.  

And eventually, Smokey learns just what happened to the Joestar Family, or at least everything that the reader needs to know to follow Part 2.   But that doesn’t happen until near the end, which is why he shows up to hear the secrets revealed.   But for most of the story, he steps aside, because that’s mostly about Joseph dealing with events in the here and now, so Joseph can act as his own viewpoint character.  

But is Speedwagon truly dead?   The story flashes back to the previous night, after Straizo killed his own disciples and clobbered Speedwagon.   They’re in this temple where Speedwagon discovered more Stone Masks, like the one Dio used, but Speedwagon also discovered an immortal man petrified in a stone column.    Straizo was enlisted to destroy this “Pillar Man” with his Hamon power, but instead he wants to use one of the Stone Masks to turn himself into a vampire.  

Before he does this, he reads Speedy’s translations of the writing on the walls of the temple.    The ancient Aztec cultists who built it said that the Pillar Man was immortal and had many powers, but he was vulnerable to the sun, just like the vampires from Part 1.   But the writings warn that the Pillar Man created the Stone Masks because of this weakness, and one day, “when he befriends the sun, the world will be his.”  That doesn’t seem to follow, since the only thing the Stone Masks seem to be able to do is make new vampires, who are just as vulnerable to sunlight as the Pillar Man.   

Anyway, Straizo doesn’t seem to care.   He just doesn’t want to die of old age, and he’s become disillusioned with the Hamon power he has, so he’s turning heel and going full goth on us.   To avoid Dio’s mistakes, he plans to eliminate any witnesses, including Joseph and Erina.  Then he’ll go into hiding and figure out a long term plan, with the rest of the world unaware of his existence. 

You know, now that I write that out, I’m amazed by how similar that plan is to what Dio ends up doing in Part 3.   In Part 1, he set about turning a whole town into zombies, and planning to unleash them on the world without any real agenda.    But in Part 3 he eventually holed up in a swank mansion in Cairo and took great pains to stay hidden while he acquired more power.   Parts 5 and 8 carry that same idea even further, with villains who go to great lengths to cover up their very existence.   

At any rate, we only see Speedwagon pass out in this scene, so it’s unclear whether he actually dies or not.   Really, using Speedwagon in this way is a pretty smart play.   He’s an old man, and he was never going to survive another 50-year time-skip into the next part, so it’s safe to assume that Part 2 is his swan song.   But how will he die, and when?   It could be at the very start, or maybe somewhere in the middle.  

Anyway, Straizo just walks up to a cafe in New York to confront Joseph, and Joseph whips out a machine gun and shoots his ass.   This whole time, Straizo had assumed that the untrained grandson of Jonathan Joestar would be easy pickings, but Joseph’s a lot more skilled with Hamon than he expected, and he’s tricky too. 

As Joseph fires on Straizo, he recalls how worried Erina was about all this.   The story kind of glosses over it, but Joseph seems to have worked out Straizo’s entire plan.   I guess that’s not much of a stretch.   He and Speedwagon were together with a temple full of Stone Masks, and then Straizo turned on Speedwagon.    Why else would he do that, unless he used the Stone Mask to turn into a vampire like Dio did?   And once you arrive at that conclusion, it isn’t hard to figure out what Straizo’s next move would be.    And that’s how Joseph was so prepared for this.    After the shooting stops, Smokey freaks out about Joseph murdering a dude, but Joseph was expecting a vampire the whole time. 

I also like Joseph’s line in the flashback.   Erina isn’t worried for herself, but for Joseph, because it looks like he’s being pulled into this same tragic fate as the rest of the family.   But Joseph resolves to face this head on.    “If this is my fate, then I accept it.”  Pretty sure Will Zeppeli said the same thing when he discovered that he would die saving Jonathan.  

There’s similar “call-to-adventure” moments in the other parts.   Jonathan has his when he accepts Zeppeli’s offer to train him to battle Dio again.  Jotaro has his when he defeats and saves Kakyoin, then learns what’ll happen to his mother if he doesn’t go.   Josuke has his when Angelo shows up and he has to avenge his grandfather.   Giorno kind of always had a hankering to take on Passione, but I think things got serious once he had a choice between killing or sparing Bruno.  There could be no turning back from that point.  For Jolyne, it was the moment she had a clear path to escape the prison but decided to go back in because that was where her enemy was.    For Johnny, it was that one battle where he chose to crawl towards the danger to save Gyro instead of withdrawing to safety.   For Gappy... I’d have to study that a bit.   

But for Joseph Joestar, it’s this moment.  Erina never sent Joseph to learn the Ripple from the Hamon monastary, and she seems to have taken great pains to keep him out of trouble, but now trouble has come to them, and Joseph isn’t about to back down.   

So yeah, bullets don’t actually kill vampires, but Joseph was hoping to destroy his head with some of those shots, or at least slow Straizo down long enough to finish him off.   Instead Straizo reveals that he has the power to shoot high pressure fluid from his eyes, the same move Dio used to kill Jonathan at the end of Part 1.   He calls this “Space Ripper Stingy Eyes” which is either stupid or brilliant depending on your mood, I guess.   He used it to protect his head from the machine gun fire, and then he uses it again to shoot Joseph... except he hits Joseph’s reflection in a nearby mirror, and I guess he didn’t notice the real thing standing behind him.

What makes this fight so awesome is that these two are determined to kill each other, and they each have extremely simple moves to defeat one another, but they have all these tricks and schemes to protect themselves.   Joseph manages to hit Straizo with Hamon, but it does nothing... because Straizo was a Hamon master before turning into a vampire.   He can’t use the Ripple without destroying himself now, but he still knows how to defend against it.   For instance, he’s got this scarf woven from dead bugs, because it conducts Hamon energy far more effectively than his own body.    So it just absorbs Joseph’s attacks and disperses the energy harmlessly away.   

Does it really have to be made of dead bugs?   I feel like Tonpetti just told him that as a prank.   “No, really (snort!) the only thing that works is dead bugs.  (tee-hee!)   It smells awful but you have to wear it (ha!).”

But Joseph has his own tricks, like... putting a dozen grenades on his opponent’s back when he isn’t looking!  Seriously, there was zero opportunity for him to do this.    One moment he steps over Straizo’s body to see if he’s still alive, and the next moment he supposedly planted all these things on his scarf.   I get that he could pull a string connected to the pin without being noticed, but that’s the only part that makes sense about this.   It’s still awesome, though.   If Jonathan had access to explosives, Part 1 would have been a lot shorter.  

I really think this was the battle that set the tone for Stand Battles in later Parts.   Araki loves these off-panel tricks in combat, and they’re a lot easier to explain when all of your characters have magic super powers.   If Joseph had Hermit Purple in this fight, there’d be no problem at all.   He could just use Hermit Purple to snake through the ventilation shafts and hook up all the grenades.   In fact, it’s tempting to suggest that Joseph was unconsciously using Hermit Purple throughout Part 2, but I don’t want to get into that right now.

Anyway, explosions don’t stop vampires any more than machine gun fire.   Straizo’s body is in pieces, but the pieces just slither back together and regenerate.   Wait, wouldn’t his head have been vaporized in that blast?   Also, Straizo spends the rest of this battle in the nude, so we know that stupid scarf is out of the equation.   Why didn’t Joseph just go back in the cafe and finish Straizo off while he was still in pieces?

Again, it’s easy to say “lol Araki forgot”, but I think it’s a lot more sensible to suggest that Joseph forgot.   As clever as he is, he went in with the Ripple, a machine gun, and a dozen grenades, and Straizo had an answer to all three.   He doesn’t want to press the attack because he’s out of tricks.   All he’s got left is another Hamon attack, which means Straizo will see it coming.   Or he’s still worried about the scarf, and hasn’t realized that it’s gone now.    In any event, he’s running away, creating some distance before Straizo can make his next move.

Also, there’s a lot of bystanders gathering around, so it makes sense to take the fight elsewhere.   Some guy named “Bruty” tries to stop Joseph to impress his girlfriend, but that backfires spectacularly.  Was Bruty in the anime?  I feel like he wasn’t, but I don’t want to check. 

The one I do remember is this girl photographer.   Spider-Man hadn’t been invented yet, so in those days photographers just sort of wandered around with their camera, waiting for Spidey to debut.   This exploding vampire diner is the best she could do in 1938.  

I just really like this lady.   There’s a spark in her eye and I just assumed she would end up being Joseph’s love interest by the end of the story.    Well, we’ll get to that.  

Instead, she’s a hostage.  Joseph and Smokey run to the Brooklyn Bridge?   I guess?   It’s a bridge, I’m sure of that much.   Anyway, Straizo catches this lady and takes her with him to intercept them.   He threatens to kill her unless Joseph faces him again.   But Straizo offers to spare Joseph and never trouble him again if Joseph runs away.   This is because Straizo figures that if Joseph chickens out now, then he’ll never be a threat to Straizo in the future, no matter how powerful his Hamon abilities become. 

Joseph tries to call his bluff, but then Straizo rips out one of the girl’s teeth to prove he means business, and Joseph gets furious all over again.  I don’t think he was ever planning to abandon this fight, but he was probably hoping to get Straizo to give up his hostage at least.   Now he’s just pissed, and Straizo is impressed.  Joseph tries to act cool, but he just can’t hide his passionate feelings.    This is in stark contrast to Jotaro, who wagered his own soul in a poker game and bluffed his way to victory. 

So Straizo tries again with the Space Ripper Stingy Eyes, but this time Joseph blocks it with two shot glasses charged with Hamon power, and then he lands the decisive blow.   But before Straizo dies, Joseph demands to know why Straizo dumped Speedwagon and the others in the river.   Not only does Joseph want to give him a proper burial, but he doesn’t understand why Straizo would have dumped them in the river, since that was how Joseph knew to expect him.  

Wait, I thought Straizo wanted Joseph to know he was coming.   Oh well.

Anyway, Straizo explains that he had to do it, because the Pillar Man was absorbing the blood from his victims.   Straizo was worried that the Pillar Man might awaken, so he put them in the river instead to be safe.    Nevertheless, he suspects that the Pillar Man will reawaken eventually anyway, and Straizo now realizes that it will be Joseph’s destiny to face him some day.    Then Straizo just uses the Ripple one last time, and self-destructs. 

It always seemed strange to me that Straizo saw the danger of the Pillar Man and just left things the way they were.   Maybe he planned to deal with him later, or maybe he just didn’t know or care about it until Joseph defeated him, and he felt a moral obligation to warn someone. 

I guess he could have destroyed the Pillar Man like Speedwagon wanted him to do in the first place, but it seems like Straizo didn’t realize that blood would wake him up until after he was already a vampire, and unable to use the Ripple.  For that matter, it remains to be seen if Hamon will work on Pillar Men.   

Anyway, what else is going on?   Oh, yeah, Europe is getting closer and closer to World War II.   The official start of the war is usually considered to be September 1, 1939, but Italy invaded Ethiopia in 1935, and Japan invaded China in 1937, and Germany annexed Austria and conquered Czechoslovakia in 1938, the year Battle Tendency is set.  So we’re in this weird time period where there’s Nazis in the story, and the British-American protagonist doesn’t care for them, but isn’t trying to kill them on sight.   I’ll be coming back to this topic later on. 

I think the main reason for including Nazi Germany in this story was to draw parallels between their goals and those of the fictional villains.    The Nazis believed themselves to be the “Master Race”, the most “evolved” people, and this made them worthy to rule the world.   Araki notes that they turned to all sorts of sci-fi/occult/fantasy stuff in their war.   Similarly, you have villains like Dio and Straizo turning to mysterious Stone Masks for spooky powers, and then you have the Pillar Man himself, who apparently sought the means to “befriend the sun” and rule over the world.    So the Nazis fit into this theme of trying to claim some sort of supremacy over other beings.  

But what’s their role in this story?   Well, the Germans have an “information base” in Mexico, run by a guy named Stroheim.   He makes pretty ladies shave him with a straight razor, and if he gets a nick he makes them lick the blood off, and then he threatens to cut off their tongues.   Also, he trained his dog to not eat treats until given permission. He’s a sick fuck, is my point. 

Wait, no, my point was that his staff discovered the bodies that Straizo dumped in the river, including Speedwagon, who’s still alive, somehow.      I guess Straizo was going to finish him off but he got in a hurry when he saw the Pillar Man absorbing the blood from the others.  Not sure how Speedwagon survived that ordeal, but Stroheim’s men have been taking care of him this whole time, and he was unconscious until recently, so it might have been touch-and-go for a while. 

            Back in New York, Joseph doesn’t know what this is all about, but he decides to go to Mexico himself to get to the bottom of it...

[jojo-fantasy-aus]

Fantasy au!

Josuke x F! reader- ch 4.

It takes two

MAJOR TW for handsy old men this time, I promise there won't be one in each chapter. I've made a system for those who are uncomfortable with these scenes or squeamish at blood.

(Very minor TW for claustrophobia at the end)

* is when you should stop reading.

** is when the handsy scene stops.

*** is when the squeamish scene stops.

The cold chill of the night started to bite into your clothes after sitting still for so long. This, frankly, sucked. In less than a few minutes you had found out that Josuke was an uncle, his nephew was older than everyone in your traveling party, and was working with the speedwagon foundation.

The foundation was so well-respected, devoted to making medical miracles for all lands. Protectors of endangered species, plant, and animal alike. Why in the world did they have a roadblock set up? The questionable men in their employment set aside, this baffled you to no end.

You had tried to ask Jotaro, the nephew, but he never actually talked to you directly in any way shape or form until he demanded that you stay outside the "base of operations" tent. Okuyasu and Josuke could waltz on in though, which pissed you off.

And so that is where you had been for the last several hours. Not wanting to wander off and run into the greasy man from earlier, you stayed as close to Josuke as you could-

You flinched.

You mean, you stayed as close to your traveling companions as you could. The two of them. Right.

-You had been slowly slipping in and out of consciousness, sat right outside of the tent's entrance on some old wooden crates as you waited for them to finish whatever business they had to discuss. Night had long since fallen, and the longer you had to wait the more anxious you became. The look in that man's eyes still lurking in the back of your brain. You shuddered. The quicker you could leave, the better. The sound of voices raising in the tent took your mind off of the memory, just for a moment however.

"Are you kidding? We're not leaving her." The agitated voice was Josuke's. Were they talking about you?

"She has no stand. She is weak. If you take her with you she will be killed." Lower and gruffer in tone, Jotaro's response was a bit harder to pick out. There that word was again. Stand. It was easy to tell that there was just so much about Josuke, Okuyasu, Jotaro, the foundation even! So much that you didn’t know. It was frustrating. When you were in the Princess' service it was so easy to learn everything about politics, about the inner lives of nobles and almost everyone in the kingdom- just by listening. But here, it was like you were just a dunce!

"If she goes home she will be killed. As long as she's with me I can keep that from happening I-" a breath. You assumed that Josuke was trying to collect himself. When he spoke again he was quieter, you had to lean closer to the tent to hear him.

"She knows the princess better than anyone else. I promise she will be of use but I'm not taking no as an answer."

"No is my final answer." They were talking about you. Your heart sank. They couldn't actually be thinking about leaving you here?! You knew it was dangerous when you agreed to accompany Josuke, you knew you might get hurt, you knew it would be difficult! But now, after you've come so far away from home, Jotaro expects you to just go back? Hell no!

You were so caught up in your own thoughts that you almost didn't see the shadow lurking in the corner of your vision.

Almost.*

You stood, ready to take off, but it was too late. The stench of tobacco and grime filled your nostrils as the greasy man from earlier grabbed you, covering your mouth with his good hand as his other arm snaked around your waist, restraining your arms. No one in the tent noticed as he dragged you far behind another set of cargo boxes. You struggled against his grip as best you could.

"Calm down. I'm not gonna hurt ya too much." He snickered, disgusting hot breath hitting your ear. It felt like acid. You tried to be louder, to make more noise through his hand, but he dug his nails into your cheek.

"Shh now, wouldn't want to have a little accident now would we?" Blood was rushing in your ears. Why did this always happen? It was always you who got into trouble, who always attracted creeps. And every time someone else had to come to your rescue! You were tired of being considered so… so weak. So defenseless. You started to get pissed at this guy. And a pissed gal's gonna do what a pissed gal's gonna do. You bit down on his hand. Hard.

He cried out in pain, retracting his hand immediately. His grip around your waist however, did not falter.

"JOSUKE-" Your shout was cut short as the man bluntly hit your nose with an open palm, leaving a stinging pain behind. You hadn't even thought before calling out for him, why had it become such a reflex? Blood dripped down your nose as his hand grabbed your throat this time.

"You wench! I'll-" Shouting made him hesitate for a moment. You didn't have time to figure out who's voice it was before the man threw you to the ground, by the time you looked back at him he was ready to run.

**

He didn't make it two feet before Josuke tackled him to the ground.

 

It was a bloody mess of fists quicker than you could've ever imagined. You stumbled to your feet when Okuyasu and Jotaro arrived at the scene. Okuyasu shouted words of encouragement, while Jotaro looked as pissed as he always does. It was like all the yelling had muffled as you spotted the blood dripping down onto your new dress. The red color was all you could think about. The blood, the bruise, the man's disgusting hands. Your own hands were shaking. When did that happen?

***

In the meantime, Jotaro had dragged Josuke off of the man. Okuyasu proceeding to yank him up and restrain him after Josuke had left him alone. Josuke only caught his breath for a moment before turning around, looking for you desperately.

You only looked up from your haze when you heard Josuke call your name. He looked completely out of sorts, bruises on his face, a stray sticking up out of his carefully styled hair. You flinched when he grappled you into a desperate, tight hug. The scent of dirt, blood, and the stupid, overly expensive cologne he always had on him- the scent of Josuke, comforted you. He was holding you safe again, he was there. You relaxed, returning the uncomfortable, chainmail embrace. He was holding you closer than anyone ever had before, and it was nice.

He pulled away and took each of your arms in his hands one by one, checking for bruises frantically. His worried face alone made your heart wrench. When he was satisfied that your arms were okay, his gaze shifted up to your face. Your eyes closed as his warm hands cupped your cheeks, his thumb running along your cheekbone before he let out a relieved sigh. Your stomach fluttered as he kissed your forehead lightly.

"Are you ok?" You weren't sure how to respond, but you didn't have time to.

"Josuke." Jotaro rumbled. He held you close for just a second too long, and only the residing heat of his warmth remained when he pulled away. Okuyasu and Jotaro had gathered around the two of you, and even though he had called Josuke's name, Jotaro looked dead at you for the first time. You tried not to wilt under his scrutiny.

"If you really want to help," He addressed you, "-you will be given a medical bag and expected to stay here as a nurse. Unless you choose to head back to the palace." Before you can detest, Josuke and Okuyasu do it for you. It might've been the overwhelming amount of emotions clouding your reasoning, but you started to get angry at the amount of times you had been interrupted.

It was hard to focus on everything they were saying. Words firing back and forth, Okuyasu starting to get just as defensive as Josuke did. You started to space out the more they continued on and on and on…

It was unnaturally strange when Josuke suddenly stiffened up, the fire in his eyes cooling into a steely rage.

"Fine." There was that spark of anger again. The same one from the first time you met him, but this time it had grown.

"Excuse me?!" You assert over the voices. "Josuke, you don't get to make that decision for me-"

"What the hell bro!-"

Despite your angered words and Okuyasu's frustrated confusion, Josuke grabbed a hold on your wrist and started to drag you towards the medical tent. You could feel Jotaro's eyes burn into the back of your head as you walked away.

"Let me go, Josuke!" You struggled against his grip, but he didn't budge. What the hell!? All that fluttery feeling in your chest, all the strange stomach flips, they all twisted into an anger you had never felt before. Who did he think he was!? You had to find Yukako with him and Okuyasu, he couldn't just ditch you like this!

"Josuke! Think about what you are doing bro, this is the exact opposite of everything we were gonna do!" Okuyasu complained behind you. You hoped that he would be Josuke's voice of reason right now, because he SURE AS HELL wasn't listening to you.

He led you through the flaps of the medical tent, and you started to struggle harder, to no avail. The confusion started to make the anger worse when he dragged you out the back and kept walking.

"Josuke? Oi!" Okuyasu's confusion was much less… explosive than yours was. Once Josuke led you to, what you assumed, was the supplies storage, his grip loosened dramatically. It felt good to rip your hand out of his grasp.

"Josuke, what the fuck!?" Josuke's face lifted in surprise, almost slipping out a laugh. Okuyasu was worse off. His laughter behind you just fueled the fire.

"What does it look like? I'm taking you with us." He muttered with a smile, searching through the boxes, and setting his eyes on an empty wooden barrel. He called Okuyasu over to help him open it, and the lid came off with a groan. Your mixed emotions just got a hell-of-a lot more complicated.

"I'm sorry." You said with a sarcastic tone."I'm having trouble figuring out what you mean. You just- and Jotaro-" Josuke finally turned around to look at you again, soft smile still on his face.

"I'm not above lying, I thought you knew that already. We're going to smuggle you out, now get in the barrel." Your jaw fell slack, face twisting in dread. What? There was absolutely no way you were going to be crammed inside of some dusty, old, disgusting-

"Josuke- pfft- I-I think I hear someone coming!" Okuyasu said in-between laughs. He was really still on the cussing thing, huh.

"Ok, times up for debate, we need to leave."

"I- what?! You're not-" He was. He picked you up swiftly, setting you feet first into the barrel despite your protests.

"No! Nono no no! Josuke-" The color had started to drain from your face. You couldn't be put in this- this thing! You already felt like the walls were closing in.

"Shh! Someone's gonna hear if you keep talking, I don't want to leave you here." Josuke took your hand in his once more, gently this time. The anger had disappeared, but panic surfaced instead.

"Josuke, I'm claustrophobic!" You hissed in a panicked whisper. He looked a little surprised, but his gentle face remained.

"You won't be in there for long, I promise. But I won't make you do this if you don't want to." You weighed the options. Stay here, go home, or help find your kidnapped best friend. The inner conflict hurt for a moment, until you decided that there was no decision to make. You had to find her. You stilled for a moment, carefully sitting down in the barrel, you fiddled with the necklace around your throat once more. Josuke gave you an understanding look.

"Keep your head down while we close the lid, ok?"

You closed your eyes. You had to remember who you were doing this for. It would all be over soon. Deep breaths, thats what you had to focus on.

It had to be over soon.

[cheemers-writing-archive]

If They Were in Smash: Jotaro

Yeah. You knew I had to start with him. Literally one of the most iconic anime characters, and the most recognizable from my favorite series.

Let’s get started, shall we?

Attacks

Jab: just a quick little punch

Three-hit jab: punch, punch again, and knee. No flurry attack.

Side tilt: long kick

Up tilt: fist swings upwards

Down tilt: Jotaro bends down and trips the opponent with his feet in whatever direction he’s facing

Side smash: Jotaro leans forward and punches. Another button press will have Star Platinum elongate the punch.

Up smash: Jotaro punches upward. Another button press will have Star Platinum elongate the punch.

Down smash: Jotaro does the splits and kicks opponents from both sides. Another button press will have Star Platinum elongate the kick from both sides.

Nair: Jotaro punches in front of him, Star Platinum punches behind

Fair: normal punch forward

Bair: stylish kick backward

Up air: stylish kick upward

Dair: Star Platinum punches downward

Neutral special: same as Jotaro’s jab, but with Star Platinum. Also, instead of a three-hit jab, Star does a flurry attack.

Side special: Star Platinum uses Star Finger, which covers about an eighth of Final Destination

Up special: Star Platinum blows air from his mouth really hard and sends Jotaro straight up. This move doesn’t hurt, but it can blow opponents downward if they aren’t standing on a platform. Inspired from Enya’s Justice fight, except instead of inhaling, Star is exhaling.

Down special: Star Platinum: The World. Works like Wario’s Waft, when fully charged time stops (including the music and timer if there is one) for two seconds (not canonically accurate, but Jotaro would be broken if you could stop time for 5 seconds). Anyone who is hit moves a bit then stops until the effect ends. All normal launch rates will continue after time resumes.

Forward throw: tosses the opponent’s body aside in front of Jotaro

Back throw: tosses the opponent’s body aside behind Jotaro

Up throw: throws the opponent’s body upward, and Star Platinum adds one last little punch

Down throw: slams the opponent’s body down, and Star Platinum adds one last little flurry of punches

Final smash: Jotaro’s final move against Dio. Star Platinum puts so much pressure on the opponent they explode (in a cartoonish, non-gory way. Gotta keep that age rating low, folks). Kills instantly if the opponent is over 100 percent.

Extra animations

Entrance: Jotaro punches through the ground, similar to the Wheel of Fortune fight

Idle animation 1: Jotaro adjusts his hat

Idle animation 2: Star Platinum appears and punches the air

Up taunt: Jotaro points to the sky, like in the DiU openings

Side taunt: Jotaro points to the side

Down taunt: Jotaro pulls his hat down and says his famous line, Yare Yare Daze

Victory poses

End music: the last five bars to Stand Proud (if you don’t know anything about music, it’s basically the final few notes before the end)

First pose: Jotaro looks up from the brim of his hat and says nothing.

Second pose: Jotaro throws a piece of paper at the camera and says, “here’s your receipt.” The dramatic slowdown (when the screen shows the victor’s name) happens as the paper passes in front of the screen, and Jotaro just keeps walking away after the slowdown.

Third pose (which only happens if Jotaro won while over 100 percent on his last stock with any of his part 4 outfits): Jotaro looks at the ground, and says, “I’m glad I got to see your growth.” Right after the dramatic slowdown, Jotaro falls to the floor.

Stage: Cairo

The stage is one of the types that moves around and lands in different locations. It starts on the side of Dio’s castle at sunset. It moves to the clock tower after some very long traveling, where you can see Joseph, Kakyoin, and Dio flying through the air. After some time, a stage hazard will appear: Hierophant Green’s tripwires. If you land on one, you’ll be barraged with emeralds. The stage moves away before *major spoiler* happens, and lands after some time on the sidewalks of Cairo. No stage hazards in this part, but in the background you can see the scenery change slightly from time to time. While the stage is moving for a third time, it stops suddenly in the air, along with the music and timer, for five seconds. The players can still move. In those five seconds, some knives fly through the air, and can hit players. The final part of the stage is the bridge. On this part, the stage hazard is a huge road roller that slams on a random part of the stage after some time. Anyone who gets hit by it has an instant KO. However, you can see the shadow coming before it lands, so you can get out of the way. After that, it loops back to the beginning of the stage.

Palette swaps

Default colors (swap 1): Jotaro’s anime outfit in part 3

Swap 2: Jotaro’s manga outfit in part 3

Swap 3: Jotaro’s outfit in part 4

Swap 4: Jotaro’s outfit in part 6

Swap 5: Jotaro’s part 3 outfit, with Dio’s colors (yellow cap/hair, yellow overcoat, black shirt, yellow pants, green shoes)

Swap 6: Jotaro’s part 3 outfit, with Kakyoin’s colors (red cap/hair, green overcoat, green shirt, green pants, brown shoes)

Swap 7: Jotaro’s part 4 outfit, with Josuke’s colors (purple cap/hair, dark purple overcoat, yellow shirt, dark purple pants, brown shoes)

Swap 8: Jotaro’s part 6 outfit, with Jolyne’s colors (green hat/hair, light blue overcoat shirt pants and shoes)

Classic mode: Helping Hands

Theme: fighters that have helpers, and the helpers are not playable. Kind of replicating the idea of Stands.

First battle: Joker in Mementos

Second battle: Duck Hunt in Duck Hunt

Third battle: Pokémon Trainer in Pokémon Stadium (this is an exception to the rule because it’s really the trainer that tells the Pokémon what to do, similar to Stand users telling their Stand what to do)

Fourth battle: Banjo and Kazooie in Spiral Mountain

Fifth battle: Olimar in Distant Planet

Sixth battle: Rosalina and Luma in Mario Galaxy

Final boss: Master Hand and Crazy Hand (I know this is kind of a stretch, but you try naming another classic mode boss battle with two bosses on screen at the same time. Also, helping HANDS.)

Palutena’s guidance

Pit: Look at this guy! He probably thinks he’s so tough.

Palutena: Jotaro thinks he’s tough because he is tough. His looks do not deceive the eye.

Viridi: It’s a shame his friends call him Jojo. Really brings down his intimidation levels if you ask me.

Palutena: Jotaro has fought lots of strong enemies before. He fought against a vampire who could stop time… and won!

Viridi: He can also stop time himself. If you suddenly go flying without Jojo punching you, or you see him teleport, don’t be surprised.

Palutena: Well, he also has that Stand, Star Platinum. Unless you have a Stand, too, Pit, you won’t be able to see his, which means you’re wide open for any attacks.

Pit: Just say I’ve already lost the match, why don’t you?

Palutena: Just like every fighter in Smash, Jotaro is a formidable opponent, but not impossible to beat. You can do it if you try.

Pit: Right. Just gotta stay away from him at all costs. *pause* You don’t think Star Platinum has that big of a range, do you?

Viridi: Good luck, Pit. You’re gonna need it.

Reveal trailer

The trailer starts with Joker comboing Mario into oblivion in the actual game. After Mario is defeated, it cuts to a cutscene with Joker falling back to the ground. Morgana says, “Woohoo! Another one down! There’s nobody here who can combat against you, Joker!”

This next scene has the camera on the ground a ways away from Joker. He taunts when he gets back to the ground, saying, “Alright, who’s next?”

In front of the camera, a leg stomps to the ground. As the camera pans up around the new figure, he says, “So, I finally found you…” When the camera gets to Jotaro’s face, he finishes with, “...copycat.” He summons Star Platinum and the splash screen appears:

Jotaro stands up to fight!

After that is the moveset showcase. You already know Jotaro’s moves.

The extra scene after the Smash logo fades away is Jotaro meeting with Simon and Richter. “Vampire hunters?” he asks. The two Belmonts nod. Jotaro nods back and goes on his way.

Extra tidbits

Jotaro would have an option to play his Japanese voice or English voice in the English version of the game.

Like many of the godlike characters in this game, Jotaro teleports when dodging.

Star Platinum only holds one item in the entire gam, the baseball bat. Jotaro holds the rest.

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

Higurashi New 2 | Wandering Witch 2 | Moriarty 1 | Taiso Samurai 1 | Kamisama 1 | Munou na Nana 2 | Golden Kamuy 3 1 (25) | Yashahime 2

I’m trying a seasonal challenge this time...so that means I have to leave some Crunchyroll anime to the side. That’s why I’m putting in the tags now.

Higurashi New 2

Apparently, now this Higurashi is called “Gou”…I dunno what that means in the context of this series, but *Saitama face* OK.

Is this girl…Rika? Or this Hanyuu girl I heard of on ANN? Update: Wait a bit from that point. You’ll get your answer.

Do they ever examine why the girls in Higurashi are what they are? Rika seems to have something supernatural going on, but Rena…is just a psycho girl right now, so it’s hard to care.

LOL, I was wondering where this “nipah” Rika meme came from, but it is present in the dialogue.

I predicted that Gilligan cu-er, transition far too easily…

Why is that kid’s face so tanned (?) in comparison to the rest of him???

How did these girls get up the building so fast??? (LOL?)

Wow, the cicada noise was pretty loud there, so…props to the sound guys for making that sound stifling.

Can we really trust what Mion is saying about Tomitake…?

I thought we were going to see Watanagashi in ep 3, but…okay.

Satoko speaks rather formally. She says kochira de gozaimasuyo! instead of kocchi! or kochiradesuyo!.

Who’s that blonde lady? Someone from Umineko?

The bright colours really help to sell the ominous nature of this ED and anime. I don’t think I understand everything that’s happening in said ED, though…

Gonna pause it here because I heard you need to watch the OG and Rei to understand this, now that the new Higurashi is operating under its “proper” name.

Wandering Witch 2

…Elaina’s a bit full of herself still…

…what the heck was that instrument playing over the titlecard? Bagpipes…?

LOL, it’s the Attack on Titan world!

Did Elaina lose her hat when she fell? That must be a very stable hat indeed.

Ooh, particle effects! However…there’s CGI here, although it’s only kinda noticeable.

Have you never heard of money…?

Wait, witches get discounts???

It seems Saya comes from Japan.

LOL, this is basically Quidditch without a snitch!

I like mushrooms, so I don’t get why people kick up such a fuss about them.

Saya seems to act like this is yuri bait…*sigh*

Saya’s crying like her sister died…c’mon, it’s not that bad!

I’m hitting pause. If this is actually how the series is, then it’s primed for a drop, but I can’t help but keep it on for the spectacular visuals and the fact it’s basically anime Harry Potter.

Taiso Samurai 1

I keep swearing I’ll finish my old simulcasts…but then new ones pop up like daisies…(I guess it’s better than having no anime to finish, right?)

I just realised how pretty Jotaro’s eyes are…! The fact he just sort of splats and then doesn’t get up shows how weary he is, unlike Sakura from Moon Land, who would’ve probably gotten up and never tried doing gymnastics again if he were in the same position.

Just by glancing over the results when I google for this Montreal gold, it seems it was done by a Kouhei Uchimura, but I might be wrong on that front…oh wait, there are 3 golds, so it’s not necessarily just that one…

You can tell this is 2002 because of that flip phone.

Intai Zamurai…it’s constructed the same way as the anime’s title. Two characters and then “samurai”.

BB (Big Bird) on the side there is so goofy, he’s…kind of distracting. <- Note the official website refers to Big Bird as BB, hence my use of it.

I was wondering if Rei was the daughter or the wife…so it’s the former.

Kinugawa Ropeway…it rings a bell, somehow. Maybe the Boueibu crew went there as DVD/BD extras.

…does everyone know that a ryokan is like a mini hotel with a traditional set-up?

*snorts* LOL, Keanu (Reeves, obviously).

That montage was a bit worrying…maybe the CGI took out part of the budget? I was a bit worried when I could tell there was CGI in that one starting segment.

…LOL, wut. Agent Smith (from the Matrix)?

Yamakasi seems to be a parkour thing which has its own movie.

…I’m sort of wondering: was that ninja a woman? If Jotaro gets another wife…I dunno if I’ll like the anime as much. Things could become far too dramatic if he did. Update: You do find out later in this episode.

I think – from lip reading – the ninja used -de gozaimasu. I remember getting it drilled into me that people don’t use that these days, but in the time of ninja and samurai, they did.

…another anime set in Ikebukuro. I knew from the station, but…’bukuro must be a nice place if people are reppin’ it all of a sudden.

Was Tomoyo an actress…?

“Kinugawa, as in the river where ogres get mad?” – See, that’s the pun I made about Boueibu’s Atsushi years ago…

This Takizawa guy’s so expressive, LOL.

Gotta love a man in a suit, yes…

…they keep building up to this retirement, only for him to not retire??? Which is it?! (LOL) That declaration works better in Japanese because the -shimasen goes at the end of the sentence so the weird sentence structure in the English translation actually makes Jotaro look like he really messed up due to nervousness speaking in front of crowds. Update: He just sounds like he stopped in the middle of a sentence in Japanese, which he obviously did.

There’s no time travel for sure, but there are ninjas! Plus dudes in jumpsuits!...plus, of course, gymnastics! It could still work, but I keep swearing there’s something supernatural coming around the corner for this…Also, this “gymnast trying to retire” thing seems to be drawing me in because of my whole current lack of direction in basically everything, much like Rikuo of Sing Yesterday for Me.

Kamisama 1

Hmm…Kamisama ni Natta Hi…it doesn’t say the subject stating this became a god, so the pronoun could be “she” or “you” rather than “I”, which seems to be the current standard for it. Update: It says on the title card “I”, so it should have an I then…I guess(?)

There’s a fish on the logo.

…this girl, I already know her name is Hina. That’s the 2nd Odin this season (the first is in Sigdrifa…or however it’s spelt)…she’s gonna be annoying, isn’t she…?

What’s this about a date…?

There are two Izanamis this season, too. The second is Hifumi from HypMic.

Looks like there was an accident, according to one of the signs.

…This feels exactly like a visual novel. I’m surprised it’s an original.

I was wondering why “Key Ramen” (Kagi Ramen) sounded weird…then it hit me. Key! You motherf**kers!!! *shakes fist* You were hiding right under my nose all along!

Hey, Potato-kun! (I know his name is Youta, but…eh, aside from having a possible girlfriend candidate and being a Nice Guy, he’s still a Potato-kun.) Stop staring in disbelief and do something!

…Why Potato-kun, anyway? Is it because his name means “become god”???

…This Izanami is so emotionless…it’s hard to imagine her cheering, Youta was right on that front.

…that style in Hina’s background…I’m pretty sure I’ve seen it for Sailor Moon Crystal, but I’ve forgotten what the artist’s name is (the one that inspired that artstyle)…

I almost expected Hina to interrupt the confession, like Leo from Taiso Samurai.

I kinda just shrugged near the end of the episode and finished it just to see if the confession would be interrupted, so…big fat drop there. I must not like much Key beyond Angel Beats (and even then, it’s only okay because it’s the relic of a time gone by).

Moriarty 1

I’ve been picking up Sherlock-related things left and right ever since I was a fan of Detective Conan…not Sherlock, Elementary or that Robert Downey Jr. movie, but the stuff Conan Doyle had his hands in. (I’d also like to keep an eye out for that Miyazaki movie, but I don’t know if I can/should go out of my way for it.) Therefore, I was a pretty easy mark for a bishonen Moriarty.

Who’s this “El” guy anyway?

…That OP is basically Black Butler all over again. I admit I went, “Oh, stuff this” for a second when I saw Rasmus Faber’s name on credits – when I went to entire series for him, they always ended badly for me – but I couldn’t stop watching the episode (since I skipped forward to the actual episode due to background noise), so this might be the anime to change everything.

I’ll be real with you – aside from Japan, America and China (the former two of which I’ve gone to and the latter I’ve technically gone to Hong Kong, which I have stronger ties to anyway), I honestly don’t have anywhere on my bucket list. That said, anime (obviously, the London arc from DC was a big factor) and this one movie called What a Girl Wants have been pretty instrumental in making Great Britain…almost make the list of places I want to go to. Key word: almost.

…I want a dub. With accents like Princess Principal.

Also, I forgot Soma Saito was our Moriarty…LOL.

“…for Man of Standing” (sic).

Turn the other cheek, Mr. Tailor.

The eyes really tell you everything about a person in this anime.

Ooh, this has absolutely no holes in its logic. It’s a strong contender!

Yashahime 2

Holy s***, is that Kagome’s brother?(!) He kinda reminds me of Takagi from Detective Conan for some reason…

Come to think of it…writers like Takahashi don’t normally have androgynous leads like Towa, do they?

That was…not the best fight scene, man.

Ooh, naginata. I’ve read a bit about them, but I’ve never really seen one used in an anime before…not to my memory. Not even the naginata in Touken Ranbu (plural) can help with that.

…this Rainbow Pearl business reminds me of Sailor Moon’s…uh, whatever they’re called…Rainbow Crystals, that’s right.

There’s something oddly comfy about predicting the “it won’t be my crying face, it’s yours you’ll get!” line, as bad as that sign may be for predictability on the whole.

I’ve felt in the years leading up to now, the progressive nations are slowly causing the entire gender binary to unravel. The more I think about my own relationship with my concept of gender – I accept gender-neutral third-person pronouns because initially I wanted to be anonymous on the internet, but now I’m just generally fine with it, for instance – the more I can agree and yet also disagree because of the progress the LGBTIQ+ community has made in recent years.

Munou na Nana 2

Ah-hah! People were calling it that the enemies of humanity were actually the superpowered kids and this proves it.

Ah, I think this Shibusawa is Masuda. I was here for him, so here he is.

Nana just says konnichiwa, which is the most basic of Japanese greetings. I don’t think it was phrased as a question, so…why did the subbers go with that?

Nana keeps breaking her chopsticks by leaving a bit at the end.

Lemme guess…Shibusawa’s talent is actually reversing time, not stopping it.

Is…that Shibusawa Nana’s giving flowers to…?

Golden Kamuy 3 1 (25)

If this is episode 25, was this always planned as a split-cour with season 2? I wonder…

Lingonberries! Oh, lingonberries! They’re those berries Ikea puts into their jam, right? (I’ve never tasted a lingonberry, but…yeah. That’s how I know of them.)

The sign says “Hurep Honpo” (backwards, as some older Japanese/Chinese things do), so it really just says “hurep” (since “honpo” = main shop). Update: Hurep actually means “lingonberry” and not the berry wine like I thought it did here, so it says “hurep wine” after all.

Thank goodness for 2D bears! (LOL)

Ratel?...uh, honey badger! That’s what they’re called in English!

…uh, and then it turns out to be a wolverine. I don’t know my Mustelidae, it seems.

There’s nothing like someone throwing a wolverine to know this is Golden Kamuy…(as weird as that sounds.)

…what was that random line about boobs about…? (Maybe it was just said to be random…?)

…ohhhhhhhh. These yellow eyes work much better than the standard red eyes you see in Munou na Nana or Moriarty. They’re so sinister.

Why did it suddenly change to an interview style…? Weren’t we waiting for a fight? Update: Seems the answer is “padding”. Not that I mind, I think it was interesting actually. Do more of that if you can.

[cheemerthelizard]

Crusader of Life 2: Chapter 12

One thing you need to know is when Emily says Mr. Bear, she’s saying that in English. This takes place in Japan, but because I’m an English speaker, as are most of you (I assume), it makes more sense to use English words. However, because of the fact that Josuke, Okuyasu, and Koichi are hearing it as her saying it in Japanese, when they say it, it’s spelled Misuta Bea, which is how you pronounce the English name in Japanese.

School was taking forever today. His first babysitting job with Emily, and he had to sit down in a chair, learning about… whatever it was the teacher was talking about. Time seemed to tick by even slower. Maybe Jotaro was using Star Platinum’s The World, and he could feel the effects. Finally, he was at the last hour, no, the last minute, of school. He watched the clock’s second hand drop down, second by second, seemingly taunting his impatience. Then, once it passed the thirty second mark, it slowly climbed back up to the twelve.

Ten seconds left.

Now five.

Three…

Two…

One…

The bell rang, and Josuke was the first one out of the classroom. He ran down the hallway, and out of the courtyard.

“Hey, Josuke!” Okuyasu called. He ran to catch up with him, along with Koichi. “Wanna come to my house today?”

“Can’t, sorry,” Josuke answered him. “I have a babysitting job.”

“Babysitting?” Koichi asked. “You don’t seem like the type to do babysitting.”

“Well, this time, it’s for an extra special person,” Josuke explained. “I’m watching over Emily.”

“Really?” Okuyasu exclaimed.

“Yup,” Josuke beamed. “And I’m getting paid for it.”

“Well, maybe we could still hang out together,” Koichi said. “We could all go to Josuke’s house and help him babysit Emily.”

“Yeah, I like the sound of that!” Okuyasu agreed. “What do you say, Josuke?”

“Well, I like it,” he muttered, “but if Mr. Kakyoin or Mrs. Lily saw me walking down the streets with you guys, they might lower my pay, since I’m not doing all of the work myself. How about you come back after thirty minutes, so we can all hang out together with Emily?”

“You’re a genius, Josuke!” Koichi praised.

“Right! We’ll meet again in thirty minutes!” Okuyasu stated.

When Josuke finally reached his house, he saw a man waiting at the front door, with a little girl who shared the same cherry red hair as her father. There was no doubt who it was.

“Mr. Kakyoin!” Josuke shouted. He waved to him, and ran so he wouldn’t have to wait anymore.

“Josuke!” Kakyoin called. “Thank you so much for taking this job, it really means a lot.” He let go of Emily’s hand, and patted her on the back. “Now, don’t cause trouble for Josuke, alright? And just because we’re letting you use Walking on Sunshine again, don’t use it too much.”

“She’s allowed to use Sunshine again?” Josuke asked.

“Her fever is completely gone,” Kakyoin explained, “so there’s no reason to not use it.”

“Makes sense,” Josuke replied. “Well, I’ll take really good care of Emily, so you don’t have to worry about a thing.”

“Thank you, again, Josuke,” Kakyoin said. “Here’s a backpack full of some stuff in case you need it, like her favorite stuffed animal, extra underwear, all of that. Lily will come pick her up at six. I’ll see you around!” When he finished, he got back into the taxi, and waved goodbye as it drove off.

“So, Emily, welcome to my house,” Josuke smiled. “It’s not much, but I’m sure we’ll have fun here.”

Emily looked around, then back at Josuke.

“Not much of a talker, are you?” he chuckled. “That’s okay. Just tell me what you want to do, and we can do it together.”

Suddenly, his head felt like it was lighter than air. That’s when he noticed Emily pointing at it, Sunshine summoned. She moved her finger down, and Josuke faceplanted straight into the ground.

“Your hair is bouncy,” Emily giggled as she played with his pompadour. “I like it.”

“I think my nose is broken,” Josuke mumbled, softly enough to where Emily couldn’t hear him say it. He shifted over to his side, and checked it out. Luckily, he could still feel it, it just hurt really bad.

“Yo, Josuke!” Okuyasu opened the door, to find his friend lying on the floor, letting his hair be played with by Emily, obviously not enjoying it.

“Yasu!” Emily cheered.

“Hey, Okuyasu,” Josuke asked, “does my nose look weird?”

Okuyasu took a good, hard look at Josuke’s nose before responding, “Nope, it looks normal to me.”

“You’re letting Emily play with your hair?” Koichi, who suddenly appeared from behind the door, said in disbelief. “She must be really special.”

“It was more involuntary than it looks,” Josuke grumbled. “She used Walking on Sunshine and pulled my hair down to her level.”

“That makes a lot more sense,” Koichi nodded.

“Hey, if you’re having trouble entertaining her,” Okuyasu suggested, “then just turn on the tv. Kids love cartoons, and I’ll bet Emily is no different. Then we can just leave her to that and do something else together.”

“Okuyasu, you have more brains than you give yourself credit for.” Josuke patted his friend on the back. “Hey, Emily!”

The little girl turned her head.

“What do you wanna watch? I’ll turn on the tv for you.”

After turning on a kid-friendly program, Josuke went back to the living room with his friends.

“Man, babysitting is easy,” Okuyasu grinned. “We should do this for a living.”

“I don’t know, I think we should be more attentive,” Koichi said. “I mean, who knows what Emily could do when we’re not looking?”

“She’ll be fine,” Josuke replied, leaning back into the floor. “After all, she’s two. She has the attention span of a rat. It’s not like she could hurt herself watching tv or anything.”

Then, right on time, crying came from the kitchen. Koichi gave Josuke a look as he ran to see what was wrong. When he arrived at the scene, a shattered plate was on the floor, and Emily was bleeding in multiple places.

“I was hungry,” Emily explained, “and I was gonna get a plate, and it was too high, and so I used Sunshine, and I sneezed, and it fell on me.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Josuke consoled her. “Look, I’ll make the pain go away.” He summoned Crazy Diamond, and had it softly touch Emily’s cheek. Before she knew it, all the pain was gone, and the open wounds had closed. “See? There’s nothing to worry about.”

“What about the plate?” Emily sniffled.

“Crazy Diamond can take care of the plate, too, don’t worry,” Josuke smiled. He touched a part of the plate, and it slowly formed back together, as if nothing happened. “If you’re hungry, just tell me.”

Emily nodded her head.

“Now, how does an apple sound?” Josuke took an apple cutter from a drawer and an apple from the fridge, then sliced the apple into eight pieces and tossed one to Emily. The slice was just out of arm’s reach, so Sunshine caught it for her right before it touched the ground.

“Poor Emily,” Koichi smirked. “If only someone was watching over her.”

“Look, I already stopped her crying, she’s fine,” Josuke ruffled Emily’s hair. “You worry too much, Koichi.”

“Fix the plates again!” Emily cheered. Without either of the boys realizing it, she had knocked down the entire stack of plates in the cabinet, making a shattered mess on the floor.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” Josuke sighed. He bent down, touching the glass shards, looking at Emily as she watched in amazement. “Okay, no more breaking the plates on purpose, got it? Or anything, for that matter.”

“Okay,” Emily nodded.

“Well, now what?” Okuyasu asked. All three boys pondered over this question for a little while. That is, until Emily suddenly gasped.

“Where’s Mr. Bear?” she asked, lip pouting a little.

“Misuta Bea?” Josuke asked. “Who’s that?”

Emily started tearing up a bit. “I need Mr. Bear.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t even know what a Misuta Bea is,” Josuke apologized. “Do either of you know?” Koichi and Okuyasu both shook their heads.

“But I NEED Mr. Bear!” Emily shouted. A few objects started to float around her. Now Walking on Sunshine was getting mixed up in this.

“Koichi, can Echoes play a melody for her?” Josuke asked urgently. “The last thing we need is to be floating around here.”

“I can try,” Koichi answered. He hummed a small melody, and threw the words onto Emily with Echoes, making them stick onto her. However, instead of the melody ending and repeating itself, a barrage of the notes filled Emily’s ears, which was very unpleasant. Of course, this just made her scream even louder, and even more objects float.

“It didn’t work!” Koichi fretted. “What’ll we do now?”

“I don’t know!” Josuke exclaimed. “Okuyasu? Any ideas?”

“Don’t look at me!” Okuyasu shrugged his shoulders.

“Maybe there’s something in that backpack labeled Misuta Bea?” Koichi wondered. Meanwhile, Emily’s cries were getting louder, and now the entire living room was floating, including the three boys.

“I can’t find anything!” Josuke said frantically after he rummaged through the bag. “Nothing in here has the label Misuta Bea!”

“She’s getting louder!” Okuyasu yelled. “What do we do?!”

“Stop yelling, you’re making her more worked up!” Josuke yelled back.

“Both of you, calm down!” Koichi told them. “Surely Misuta Bea is a codeword for something in that backpack, just start giving her random things!”

Josuke did what Koichi said, pushing things over to Emily, hoping she’d stop crying.

“Look, it’s your own little toilet, is that what you’re crying about?” he asked. “Maybe you wet yourself already and you need some underwear? Look, it’s your little teddy bear, maybe that’ll stop your crying!”

As soon as Emily laid eyes on the bear, her tears came to a halt, and everything that was once floating landed hard on the ground, including some things that broke.

“Mr. Bear!” she cheered, walking over to it and hugging it.

“So, that was it?” Okuyasu said. “She just wanted her teddy bear?”

“Apparently so,” Josuke sighed. It would have been really cute seeing the little girl cuddling up next to the plush, if it weren’t for the mess she created. “I’ll fix the stuff around the house, you guys just make sure she doesn’t start crying again.”

***

“I’m sorry, ma’am, but there’s nothing we can do,” Lily told a now weeping mother. “As a fellow mom, I can only imagine how hard it is to hear that your child is going to die, but the arrow didn’t choose him. If there’s anything we can do to help you, don’t be afraid to ask.”

“My son… Hisashi…” the mother sobbed. “He barely even lived his life…”

“We’ll give you a choice, of course,” Lily said. “The Speedwagon Foundation can keep him alive for as long as possible before he passes, or you can let him go quickly. I know neither of these are easy choices, but-”

“I’ll let him go on his own accord,” the mother sighed. “There’s no use trying to prolong his life if he’s just going to be in pain.”

Lily nodded. “If you’d like, you can always call me, and if you need a shoulder to cry on, I’ll be here. I hope it helps you to know that the one who did this to your son is currently in jail.”

“That does help a little bit,” the mother replied, choking on her tears. “I hope he stays in jail for a long time.”

“Oh, don’t worry, he will,” Lily promised. “Again, I’m so very sorry about your son, and I wish there was something we could do.”

“You’ve done far more than enough by just being worried about him,” the mother, who's crying had subdued a little, sniffled. “Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome,” Lily answered. As she left the driveway that the woman’s house was on, she looked down at her watch. Already five thirty? It was time to pick Emily up. As she walked down to Josuke’s house, Lily let her thoughts wander.

That arrow was dangerous. It barely even scraped that little boy’s neck, yet he was stricken with a virus that even Josuke couldn’t fix. It was a good thing that Jotaro had a hold of it, or it might fall into the wrong hands. But what made some people worthy of a Stand while others were cursed with death because of it? It wasn’t fair. None of it was fair. But life isn’t fair. The only thing that Lily could do was help those who couldn’t help themselves, and she would continue doing that for as long as she could.

Here she was. The Higashikata residence. Even from inside, she could hear Emily’s happy screams, Josuke’s muffled laughs, and… Koichi and Okuyasu? Well, more than one sitter wouldn’t hurt.

Inside, Emily was trying to run away from Okuyasu, but he kept scraping away at the air behind her, teleporting her straight into his arms.

“Oh, I got you again!” he exclaimed as Emily squealed. “You can’t escape me!”

A sudden chime from the doorbell startled all four of them, heads snapping to the sound.

“Oh, it’s Mrs. Lily,” Josuke said as he peered through the doorhole. He looked over at a clock and nodded. “Yeah, I guess it’s time for Emily to go.”

“Awww, but we were having so much fun!” Okuyasu whined.

“I’ll be sitting for her tomorrow, there’s no need to be so sad,” Josuke chuckled. “Hey, Mrs. Lily,” he quickly changed his tone as he opened up the door.

“Sounds like Emily had fun,” Lily smiled.

“Mommy!” Emily cheered as she caught sight of her mother standing in the doorway.

“Hey, Emily,” Lily laughed. “Ready to go home?”

“No!” Emily instantly grabbed onto Okuyasu’s leg and pouted. “I wanna stay!”

“Oh, that’s a shame,” Lily prodded. “I guess Daddy and I will go have some ice cream by ourselves, then.”

“No, wait, I want ice cream!” Emily quickly let go of Okuyasu and ran to grab Lily’s hand.

“I thought you might,” Lily giggled. “Anyway, Josuke, you need your payment. How does 5,000 yen sound?”

Josuke’s eyes widened. “5,000 yen? That sounds great!”

“Great! Then I’ll just pay you up front… one, two, three, four, five thousand. There we go.” Lily handed the bills over to Josuke, who happily accepted.

“Oh, one more thing,” he interjected.

“Yes?”

“The teddy bear, Misuta Bea…”

“Oh! Mr. Bear! It’s English for Kuma-San,” Lily explained. “I lived in America all the way up until high school, so sometimes I’ll teach her some English words and phrases, and sometimes she’ll use them for naming her plushies.”

“Oh, that makes sense,” Josuke nodded.

“Thank you again for taking this job, it’s a huge help for us,” Lily said. “See you tomorrow!”

“Bye!” Josuke called as Lily walked Emily back to the hotel.

“She’s just the cutest thing,” Koichi grinned.

“Yeah, when she’s not making the whole house float just because she wants her teddy bear,” Josuke muttered. “Alright, I’m gonna get to work on my homework. You guys wanna help each other out?”

“You bet!” Okuyasu chimed.

“Of course!” Koichi added.

“Sweet! Well, let’s get to work, shall we?”

[aftermathdb]

DEATH BATTLE Review: Weiss vs. Misturu

Y’know, I had a gag planned when that required Weiss to be introduced after two other RWBY Characters that I don’t think I can do anymore since Weiss got introduced before them. Maybe I can do a deleted scenes thing later…

Two Ice Queens battle for the true reign over the ice castle!

Weiss′s Preview.

The world of Remnant is full of many things that make it famous. From the vicious creatures of Grimm, to the Huntsman and Huntresses that are sworn to fight them, and many many more. But in this world, you’d be hard pressed to find a person who has never heard of the Schnee family.

And like any famous family, these guys are like royalty. And their princess, is Weiss Schnee.

Like many children born to great families, Weiss’ home life wasn’t that fun. Her father had high expectations for her, and she was set to just run the place… Whenever that happens. But, in defiance to her father’s wishes, she got out and joined Beacon Academy, an illustrious school where everyone can learn how to fight monsters. And once she joined a team, she put the ‘W’ in team RWBY.

But Weiss can’t just get by with money. So like most Hunters (Which is what I’m going to be calling them so that I can save some space), Weiss got herself a weapon, which Boomstick nicknamed Merc-Nasty.

This rapier is nearly three feet in length, and, much like nearly every other weapon in the show, it doubles as a gun (insert “it’s also a gun” joke here)!

Myrtenaster comes equipped with a six-slot Dust chamber. And unlike the dust in our world, the Dust in this world is special. Similar to the materia from Final Fantasy or Crystals from Storm Hawks, these all come with their own stats and effects.

Weiss is a fan of combining water and wind to create Ice Dust

But, if you’re going to fight giant shadow monsters, criminals, and godzilla dragons, you’re  going to need way more than just a stick to fight them with.

Think of Semblances as “X-Men” powers. They’re all unique in their own ways. However, Weiss’ Semblance is a bit different. In the sense that instead of it being unique, it’s actually inherited through her family line. Kinda like the mark of the Joestar (Before you ask, no. No Jojo character is up next. I’m upset about it too).

Weiss’ Semblance lets her do all sorts of crazy stuff. From manipulating gravity, to time dilation, to manipulating dust.

But most impressive of all, is the summons, which lets Weiss act like Yuna from FF X and bring out monsters she’s beaten to fight alongside her.  And the most powerful one of all, would be knight, the Arma Gigas… Which means “Giant Armor” in Latin.

But yeah. Weiss’ family is pretty dysfunctional, and kinda abusive at times. Her Colonel Sanders-looking dad up there cut her out of the family line, leaving her piece of shit brother as the sole heir to the company.

But if there are any physical weaknesses Weiss has, it would probably be her durability.

Aura is finite, and takes time to recharge. Sure, you’re basically invincible when you do have it, but when it’s out, you’re out.  And compared to Best Girl Yang (Fight me), Weiss’ durability isn’t that great. And since using her Semblance also burns aura, she’s more likely to run out sooner rather than later.

But Weiss is pretty tough. She once managed to survive a train crash. Judging by the size of the fragmentation, and applying the appropriate mathematics, the amount of force Weiss withstood comes out to be about…

Not good enough?- Then how about the time she knocked over a giant mech that was designed to fight giant leviathan grimm?

Judging by the size of her partner beside her, Weiss’ output of force should come around to about…

And it’s unlikely that Weiss is doing this using only dust. So, by using the water,  we can get an estimate as to how much energy is being used for this attack.

For those of you wondering, this translates to over 230 tons of TNT!

Forget Dust. Weiss could make a killing on giving people renewable power alone.

Weiss might not be the strongest of her team, but with her newfound family, she’s certainly proven that she is far more than just a name. And she’s out to prove that this life is hers.

Misturu′s Preview.

In the early 2000s, you’d be hard pressed to find anyone in Japan who hasn’t heard of the Kirjio group, a global conglomerate that was involved in nearly every aspect of daily life. .

And just like any other major company like this, they had a family. And this princess, was known as Mitsuru Kirijo

One day, Mitsuru’s Grandfather was experimenting with some sort of mental world called “The Mind Place.” Officially known as “The collective unconscious.” Because companies doing shady business deals is apparently something we should expect. When is news going to break out that Disney does have their founder’s head in a jar?

Anyways, the Mind Place connects every living being’s subconscious mind. Things known as “Shadows” lived there.

These things are basically demons. But if you want to see an inner demon, you find a person’s “Shadow Self.”

Surprise surprise, Grandpa Kirijo decided to try and get to the shadows for himself. But, as per usual, summoning demons never works out… Unless you play an Archfiend Deck in Yu-Gi-Oh, in which case, go nuts.

So, everything kinda went to shit because of it, and not only were the shadows released into the world to attack an unsuspecting populace, this tower thing here:

the Tartarus, arose. It’s basically the citadel between worlds. The earth was changed with a new “Dark Hour.” A period of time where everything freezes at Midnight.

Most people don’t really notice though. Time resumes as normal when it’s over, and almost nobody really notices.

Almost.

Some people can keep moving around in this time. Mitsuru is one of them. since she felt bad about her family’s company screwing everyone over, so she decided to fix it.

And while her rapier skills are certainly good, on account that she’s in the fencing club at her school, a small sword like that isn’t exactly enough to take down a bunch of evil shadows… Wait, hang on. Do both of these franchises have Heartless ripoffs?- Moving on, Mitsuru also has various abilities that she can use.

And on top of all of it, she even got a Stand Persona, named Penthesilea, which later grew into Artemisia.

With Artemisia by her side, Mitsuru has a lot of powerful ice spells that she can call upon in battle. So it’s basically a Stand except they don’t have that rule of “Only a Stand can defeat another Stand” thing going for them… Huh, note to self: Have Jotaro and Mitsuru get into an argument about terminology. Also unlike Stands, Personas can be defeated, but they’ll come back after a short time.

Similar to Stands, Personas also kinda reflect damage back to the user. But since it’s more linked to the personality rather than the soul or fighting spirit, it’s more mental stress if anything else.

Artemesia gives Mitsuru all sorts of awesome stuff. Like ice powers that could give Elsa a run for her money. It also grants Mitsuru enhanced strength, speed, and durability. In addition, it also makes her completely immune to the cold and ice-based attacks. I’d ask “Why the fur coat?” But, as we all know, Everyone needs a fur coat (And it’s a pretty nice coat). She can also sense her surroundings via analytical clairvoyance, which makes sneaking up on her pretty hard.

But, like all great heroes, nobody really does it on their own. Mitsuru created the S.E.E.S, or the “Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad.” A group of Persona users that were basically the Teen Titans, if they had Stands instead of superpowers. And, as an added bonus, it’s an after school club, so bonus extra credit!

And you might be thinking “How would one summon a Persona?” Well, since this franchise wasn’t done ripping off Jojo (I looked it up, Stands and the Stand Arrows were introduced about three years prior to Persona 1), they decided to uh… Use the Evoker… Which… Fair warning…

(I think I’ll take the Stand Arrow instead).

The idea behind the Evoker is that it evokes a strong traumatic experience to awaken a person’s Persona, similar to how Mitsuru’s first experience in summoning hers was also traumatic.

To add to the unsettling nature of this, you don’t just have it shot at you. You aim it at your face, and pull the trigger. DEFINITELY taking the Stand Arrow over that.

Anyways, with all that power, Mitsuru’s pulled off some ridiculous stuff.

Here’s an added bonus: One Persona user that could outrun a bullet fired from a Magnum. So it’s reasonable to say that Mitsuru could do this too.

If that last feat wasn’t impressive enough for you, Personas can move even faster. One of them reacted to and caught an arrow within milliseconds. And since Mitsuru defeated this user and Persona in a fight.

But if you’re looking for a durability feat, then look no further, because Mitsuru once survived an explosion.

This one to be exact.

This is easily the longest series of images I’ve had to upload in a row. And isn’t Boomstick a Poultry Scientist?- Why’d he say “I’m a scientist now.”?

Ahem, moving on. Artemisia also once helped out in icing these creepy puppet things:

Now, using the surrounding air and accounting for Nitrogen (As it makes up a good chunk of the air we breathe), we can get some calculations for this feat.

The energy output, after the calculations are done, comes to around…

Okay, forget Weiss supplying people with Power, Mitsuru’s where it’s at. Maybe she could slow down out polar ice caps from melting.

And after ending the Dark Hour and redeeming her family name, Mitsuru continued battling for people everywhere. One shadow at a time.

Not too shabby.

The Battle Itself.

Torrian and Kristina are here for animation, Weiss will be voiced by Kara Eberle and Mitsuru will be voiced by Corey Pettit, music (Winter Sonata) by Therewolf,  and audio by Chris Kokkinos.

So, we just jump right into the middle of the fight. No explanations, no story build-up, no nothing. It’s just like RWBY Volume 4! Ha ha! … Sorry, I, I just, I had to get that in there… God, that was a garbage volume.

So, with swordplay looking to be about even, both sides are basically going to be relying on their other skills for this bout. Y’know, a fencing tournament getting out of hand would have been an interesting story for this fight.

So, a bit of talking later, and the fight just picks up. And it occurs to me that they should have used this as the example fight for why the “FIGHT!” soundbite shouldn’t return. Like, c’mon guys.

Back on the fight, Weiss uses her ice powers to try to give Mitsuru the cold shoulder, but as we’re already aware, that’s not very effective.

And out comes Artemisia, which Weiss manages to parry some of the attacks, and opts to get the hell out of dodge after a quick burst of fire.

The Wasp up there is then sent to fight Mitsuru’s Persona while Weiss opts to fight Mitsuru directly.

But, let’s face it. The Rapier Wasp is a Bug Flying type. So Artemisia takes it down.

And with Weiss distracted, Mitsuru then gives her a kick to the face. That’s the face of someone who was wondering why she was just standing around when there was someone trying to kill you right in front of you.

But Weiss isn’t a fan of being kicked in the face, so she uses her gravity glyphs to make some distance.

And with that distance comes…

The Arma Gigas! Let’s be real, we wanted this fight so that we could see this knight fight Artemisia. After a couple of combos where neither side seems to make any headway, Artemisia then fires some frigid projectiles towards Weiss.

Her Knight, being a gentleman, takes the blow for her.

Weiss charges (with added assistance from her time dilation glyphs) and manages to actually stab Mitsuru.

Unfortunately for her, Mitsuru doesn’t go down that easily. And she uses Artemisia to knock them both down.

Finishing blow in 5…

4…

3…

2…

1…

Imperious Queen of Executions indeed.

Verdict + Explanation.

So, to Weiss’ credit, her versatility put up a decent fight. But she was pretty outclassed in other categories aside from speed thanks to time dilation.

But with Mitsuru’s analytical clairvoyance, that speed gap gets a lot smaller. To the point that Mitsuru’s the one that can outpace Weiss. Not that it matters, Artemisia outpaces Weiss a few times over.

Now sure, the time powers seem like an insta-win, right? Well, maybe that would give Weiss a win in some scenarios, but not all of them.

Since Weiss is extra reliant on Ice Dust, and her other Dusts are fairly lacking, Mitsuru didn’t really have to deal with fire at all. Especially since Weiss doesn’t have the best track record with fire (As we’ve seen from that fire geyser from before).

It also doesn’t help that the explosion from earlier is pretty up there in terms of destructive power. Power that isn’t really that low for anything Weiss had to really beat it out.

Using calculation provided by Boomstick (Yes, you read that right), the calculations can be made through the height of the bridge.

This puts the explosive yield to about.

And this is even accounting for the fact that the person setting it off wasn’t even planning on killing Mitsuru too.

Also, remember those big ice structures that each of them made?- Well, comparing them directly, Weiss’ energy output doesn’t come close. Even if one were to cut Mitsuru’s stat in half, on account that she had help for this feat, Weiss falls short. About a hundred times short to be exact.

At the end of the day, Mitsuru had the power, skill, and durability to take Weiss down. Sure Snow White there had versatility, but at the end of it all,

Overall impression.

I heard from a friend of mine (And I  read  it on the Persona Wiki) that Personas can’t really be seen by non-persona users. Whilst this doesn’t really make much of a difference since it was more exciting to see the Arma Gigas directly fighting Artemisia instead of having it flailing around while the Persona just chipped away at it, it would have been nice to have seen this acknowledged.

Also, I kinda had like… Ten jokes that I could have used for my own end quip, but I’ll just post that to my Deviantart account as a list.

Overall, the results are solid, the animation is good, and it feels well-made. Sure, Weiss’ death could have been a bit more brutal (I would have liked to have seen her shattering with the ice), but as far as underwhelming deaths go, this one wasn’t that bad.

6.9/10. It would have been higher, but we didn’t get a “Bites the Dust” reference for Boomstick’s end joke (The song, not the Stand).

Next Time…

MORTAL KOMBAT! DO do do do dodo doot do do doot do doot do do do!

By the Gods I have been wanting to use Johnny Cage for the story. And having another Nintendo rep is always a plus. This… Is gonna be fun!

Is there a fight that you want me to review? - Send an ask/request, and I’ll look into it!

Do you want to read my fanfic based around DEATH BATTLE itself? click here!

Thank you for reading, and I hope to see you next time for…

Falcon Punch vs. Nut Punch

[yanagihime]

Long Vento Aureo shitpost incoming

This is a result of me trying to think too hard on the background of the characters I cosplay, and coming up with too many headcanons as a result.

Plus, I have annoyed @auralime with this theory for too long and it’s time for someone else to suffer through this now I guess.

Anyway, the culprit for this little essay/study is, in this instance, no other than Giorno Giovanna from Vento Aureo. I will also mention some events and characters not shown in the anime yet, so this is the warning. Anime-onlys, avert your eyes now.

Actually, the previous paragraph may be somewhat incorrect, since in the course of this post I will try to make the following statement: Giorno’s legal name is still Haruno Shiobana; he never changed it.

It felt strange for me when, in Episode 1, it came as a surprise to Koichi (and by extent, Jotaro) that Haruno now went by Giorno, even though Jotaro had gotten plenty of information on him beforehand. If you look at a HQ image of the reverse of the photo Koichi has at the airport:

it reads  汐華 初流乃　(Shiobana Haruno), (then some kanji I can’t really make out but probably 住所/address), Via Bosco di Capodimante, 75/b 80131, Neapolis NA, ITALIA, Dormitorio della scuola media Neapolis, 304. The address is one of an actual middle school in Naples, too. I’m guessing 304 is a dorm room number. The scene in the anime shows that Jotaro also has plenty of recent-looking pictures of Giorno, still with black hair but already rocking the pink suit, as well as of his mother, step-father and school. This is a lot of information you have on a guy. Therefore, why would the fact that Haruno is now Giorno somehow slip past Jotaro&Co?

If Jotaro had gotten his information from some national register, it would have the documents on the name change. If he somehow got his hands on school records, there is no way Koichi would have been sent to search for Haruno, because the school wouldn’t have a student with that name. This seems to indicate that whatever was the source of information Jotaro found, it still listed the youth that had moved to Italy 11 years ago as Haruno Shiobana.

We are never told when Haruno apparently changed to Giorno. In the anime scenes, his stepfather initially calls him by his Japanese name, but by the time he appears to be in elementary school, both him and school bullies are calling him Giorno. However, ‘Giorno’ could just as well be a (not necessarily positive) childhood nickname, that ended up being used all the time, up to the point that Giorno himself is only introducing himself exclusively with that name. 

Haruno’s last name would probably not change simply because his mother is now married and has a different last name herself. Experts in 1990s Italian law are free to correct me, but usually a child’s last name will only change if they are officially adopted.There is no information on whether Mr. Giovanna actually adopted Haruno/Giorno. He did not seem like a particularly pleasant man, so it’s not unfeasible that official adoption papers were never filed. The anime makes no secret that school bullies gave Haruno a hard time for being half-Japanese, so he could have started using his step-father’s last name as a protective measure, even if it didn’t really work. It doesn’t look like he is particularly proud of his Japanese heritage. The airport security mention how Giorno doesn’t look Japanese at all, so apparently Padre’s genes proved to be dominant after all.

If ‘Giorno’ really is a nickname Haruno got as a child, there is no information where it came from. His family is not particularly affectionate towards him, so unless it initially was meant to be mocking, but Haruno failed to pick up on it. We are talking about the guy who thinks “Gang-Star” is a cool title, after all (GioGio I love you but please don’t pun).

There is another interesting little bit of information. Let’s say that Jotaro had an extraordinary moment of incompetence, so after somehow finding out that DIO had surviving girlfriends, making mental connections and deciding these relationships were probably rated NC-17, finding information on at least one of these lovers that had given birth... he then did not bother to check what the child’s name was? Okay, we can imagine that. Except, there was actually one more time when someone else failed to get correct information on Giorno.

In Man in the Mirror arc, Illuso pulls Fugo into the Mirror World and proceeds to read him a short summary of his wiki page

and then he gets to Giorno and goes “Nope, I’ve got nothing.” Apparently he’s even unsure of his last name. Now, Illuso is hinted to be the intel guy of La Squadra. Gathering information and ambushing the targets based on that is, quite literally, his job. We don’t know how long he had tracked the Bucci Gang, but it would still make sense if he at least knew some basic things about Giorno: age, the fact that he’s from Naples, is a middle schooler, anything? I know it’s 2001 and Google is still young, but there must have been other databases Illuso could check. (Alternate theory: Mirror World has no Internet. A truly horrible Stand power...) 

Unless he was searching for the wrong guy all along. It makes sense he found nothing about Giorno Giovanna if he should have been looking for Haruno Shiobana all along.

Long story short, the new Don of Naples has a really embarrassing school ID somewhere in his wallet.

Did anyone even bother reading all the way down? I’m surprised. If anyone feels like adding something, please do.

[maxsmusicmacrology]

Cliffhangers and Coffin Dances: Laughing in the Face of Death

Roundabout is a progressive rock track by the English rock band Yes. Released in 1971 for their album “Fragile”, and has since become one of their most popular and most recognized songs. It’s a lengthy track featuring poetic lyrics and long solo sections, but it’s most distinct feature may be it’s intro. Roundabout starts with an extended acoustic guitar riff consisting of incredibly sparse notes, before reaching a drop that completely switches the mood of a song. Give it a listen:

Hirohiko Araki, creator of the Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure series, cited Roundabout as one of his inspirations for the series, and when the manga finally received an anime adaptation in 2012 they used Roundabout as the ending theme for the first season. As episodes of the manga and the anime were serialized weekly, they relied fairly often on cliffhangers to keep the audience engaged, often ending at a tension point to keep people coming back for next week. At the end of most episodes, the anime would play a few seconds of the song before the drop, then it would freeze-frame on a “to be continued” screen before segueing into the end credits.

(Roundabout was no longer playing at this point in the anime, but you get the idea)

It took a few years, but soon enough the internet realized “hey, this is a joke we can drive into the ground!” A new video meme known as “the Roundabout meme” or “the to be continued meme” began circulating in 2016, finding especially strong success on vine. The guidelines for the meme are simple: the video opens with a few seconds of what appear to be ordinary video, with the acoustic opening playing over it. There’s no rule as to how long this section has to be, but it generally wasn’t longer than a few seconds to stop the viewer from getting bored, and due to length restrictions on Vine it tended to only be 3-4 seconds. Then, something terrible has to happen right as the drop hits. It can be anything from something falling over to footage of an international catastrophe, but we never actually see it happen- the video freeze-frames and we hang on a “to be continued” screen as the drop starts to play. Below is a brief compilation to illustrate the meme.

CONTENT WARNING: the video contains footage of people (and 1 animal) that may have preceded serious injury. While no actual harm is shown, the video may be stressful or distressing to watch.

So, why Roundabout? Part of it is because of the popularity of Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure and how meme-able everything in the franchise is, but the Roundabout meme was enjoyed and eventually created by people who had never even heard of the series. Besides, plenty of other shows have “to be continued” moments and theme songs that could be incorporated into a similar meme. I believe it’s the structure of Roundabout that lead to its memetic evolution.

The opening to Roundabout is, for lack of a better term, boring. I don’t mean that in the “ugh, I’m going to skip this part” sense, because it’s boring-ness is an important contrast to the rest of the song (and the riff’s incorporation later on is wonderful), but it’s an acoustic guitar not doing anything special accompanied by a few trippy noises. It’s perfectly unassuming and a perfect match for the first half of the meme, which is a scene of ordinary life where nothing special happens.

And then the drop comes. Roundabout doesn’t ease you into it, one moment you’re listening to a slow guitar and the next you hear actual chords and a bangin bassline. It’s the perfect accompaniment to a meme about sudden catastrophe. Everything’s fine, and then suddenly it’s high-octane chaos.

What, then, could replace Roundabout? Meme formats get tired, but the ideas they wish to express are always there. People eventually got tired of using Roundabout for their memes, but no one wanted to stop making light of sudden injury or catastrophe. So Roundabout went the same way as any tired old meme: it picked up a new skin.

In Ghana, there’s a tradition where after someone’s passing, their family can hire pallbearers to dance while carrying the departed’s coffin. While this may seem macabre to those of us raised in the west, in Ghana it’s viewed as a way to celebrate the person’s life. As you can see in the video linked below, the dances are quite impressive and fun to watch. 

The song playing over the video is Astronomia by Tony Igy and Vicetone, and this is Roundabout’s spiritual successor. This new format, known as “the coffin dance meme”, ominously rose to popularity in March of this year. While Roundabout, in my opinion, is a more fun format, the coffin dance is easier to make and much funnier on first viewing. The rules are simple: include a clip of something dangerous about to happen to someone, then before we see any consequence, cut away to the dancing pallbearers carrying a coffin while Astronomia plays. The implication being, of course, that the person featured in the meme is in the coffin.

Roundabout and the coffin dance do vary in one significant way, though. Roundabout is at least tangentially empathetic- even if the meme is made to make light of a potential tragedy, the song matches the mood of the scene, recognizes the chaos that may be unfolding behind the “to be continued” filter. Astronomia, meanwhile, sees the tragedy and laughs at it. The dancing pallbearers may be there to celebrate life in Ghana, but this is a distinctly western meme. We live in the culture that gave us Fortnite, where players dance over their enemies’ corpses, and our preconceptions tell us that people dancing with a coffin are making fun of whoever’s inside.

(for those of you who were worried, apparently he had a parachute)

So why Astronomia? At first glance, it seems like the answer might just be “because that’s the song the first guy put in the video”. The rhythm is just right, and it looks like the dancers are in time with the song when synced up properly. But just like with Roundabout, there’s plenty of other songs that would’ve fit just as well. Astronomia has a unique sound profile, making a very clear electronic feel without that sound being overbearing. That leads to dissonance that fits the meme really well- in the western world, EDM is just as out of place at a funeral as dancing pallbearers.

More importantly, though, I think it’s the mood of Astronomia that really cemented it as the successor to Roundabout. It’s an upbeat song, but there’s a faint hint of sadness clinging to it, like water clings to leaves after a storm. Both memes are products of their respective times- in 2016, change was sudden and unexpected. Out of nowhere, the entire world was in upheaval and no one knew what to do about it. Four years later, we’re all jaded and over it. Tragedy and misfortune are expected at this point, the only thing we can do now is make a mockery out of it and find our happiness where we can.

Links used:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LuGAWR2eRyQ - Roundabout by Yes

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/977/284/b6e.jpg - Angry Jotaro

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HsiNzg6-_MY - Roundabout meme compilation

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/363/817/9e7.jpg - scooby doo meme

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9V78UbdzWI - “official” dancing pallbearers + Astronomia video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W0QeptEf49k - Coffin dance skiing meme (debated to be origin of coffin dance)

[skullvis]

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure: Diamond is Unbreakable Live Action Movie Spoilers/Review!

Hello! I’m living in Japan right now, and was lucky enough to see the new live action Jojo movie!! I’m gonna talk about the stuff they changed and the stuff they added to the movie, as well as some very big spoilers so please be sure that youre okay with spoilers before reading this! If you want to wait until the movie is available subbed or dubbed that’s fine! This is just for anyone who really wants to know about the movie right now and doesn’t want to wait! There are some pretty big differences, but it’s your choice if you want to wait or learn about them now! 

I will also give my general impression and a little review at the end. 

First off I want to say that I thought all the actors did an excellent job. I can’t imagine the pressure of portraying such iconic characters, but I felt like everyone did a spot on job. In particular, Yusuke Iseya, Jotaro’s actor did fantastic. He let himself show more emotion than I was used to seeing with Jotaro’s character, but it really worked, and he was still able to pull off Jotaro’s “seriousness”. 

Second, I want to say is that it is an adaptation. I don’t think anyone was expecting every little thing to be the same as the manga, but I do want to make it clear that a lot of stuff was cut, and that the movie only covers up to chapter 18 of DiU. I am sorry if something you liked from the manga got cut or altered, but please remember that they couldn’t even get everything in the anime which had 39 episodes. The movie had a lot of heart and even though things were changed a lot was kept true to the manga’s plot and the characters! 

Important side note--There is NO animal cruelty in this movie. Angelo doesn’t attack the man with the dog, so if you were worried about that it’s okay! You won’t have to see any animal violence. 

Things Changed: 

--The movie apparently takes place in present day, and the characters use Cell Phones. 

--Angelo is still at large instead of in prison at the start of the movie. He’s escaping from a crime scene when Keicho shoots him with the arrow, as opposed to being in jail. 

--Koichi and Josuke are now 2nd years, and Koichi is a transfer student. He and his family just moved to Morioh. 

--The scene with the turtle doesn’t happen. Instead Koichi is stopped by punks in an alley way, and that’s where Josuke fights them. 

--Koichi and Josuke have met before the alley scene, but Josuke doesn’t remember Koichi initially. Koichi doesn’t meet Jotaro until later. 

--Yukako and Koichi have a few scenes together early on. Yukako gives Koichi her english homework and tells him she’ll help him study. There’s a ton, and she pressures him to do all of it. Koichi is made uneasy by her from the start. 

--The scene where Josuke saves the girl at the convenience store happens before Josuke meets Jotaro. 

--Tomoko doesn’t get to punch a guy into his car :c 

--A lot more time is spent on Josuke grieving his grandpa right after he dies. Even Jotaro is pretty choked up by it. The actors did a really good job in that scene. Josuke cries :c

--Jotaro freezes time during the fight with Angelo

--The fight with Angelo and Angelo’s being turned into a rock is almost entirely the same as the manga/the closest they could get. The fight scenes were done wonderfully. 

--We actually see Josuke and Tomoko go to Ryohei’s funeral. Koichi also goes, as do many of the other kids from Josuke’s high school apparently. I can only guess this is cause Ryohei was a well known police officer. 

--Josuke sees Keicho watching the funeral and chases after him, leading him to the Nijimura’s house. Koichi follows Josuke after seeing him leave, and that’s how they both get there. 

--Dio is not mentioned in the film at all (if he was, I missed it)

--The fight between the Nijimura’s and Josuke and Koichi is done beautifully and with a lot of detail to make it as close to the source as possible. The only differences were that Echoes hatched during the fight with Keicho and that (THIS IS A MAJOR MAJOR SPOILER THAT WILL EFFECT THE SECOND MOVIE AS WELL SO BEFORE YOU READ PLEASE BE SURE THAT YOU WANT TO KNOW THIS!!!)

--Red Hot Chili Pepper is not the stand that kills Keicho. Sheer Heart Attack is. (sorry Akira Otoishi fans) I personally think this was a really smart move on their part, as DiU is fucking long as hell. It’s clear that they’re trying to move the story along to get as much of the main plot in as they can. While I also have to admit that I am sad we aren’t gonna get to see every minor character and plot line, I also understand why they did and think it was a great choice. My opinion may change later but for now I think it was the best decision. 

--After that, there is a final scene of Okuyasu, Josuke, and Koichi being friends and going to school, with all three of them saying “Yo” to the Angelo rock. There is a stinger that shows Kira’s house, and shows that he now has the arrow. 

Things that were added:

--Angelo meets with Keicho and they have a meal together? Angelo threatens Keicho with his stand and Keicho whips out Bad Company and puts that nonsense to bed. 

--Jotaro calls Joseph and talks to him in English. I can’t remember if this was ever specified in the manga or not, that they spoke English, but I guess he can speak English! Also major props to Yusuke again, because I could understand everything he said fairly easily without subtitles. It was clear he put in the practice and had pretty good pronunciation. c: 

--There’s a scene where Yukako stops Koichi on the way to school, and asks him if he notices anything different about her. The first thing he guesses is her hair, but eventually she tells him it’s her nails. She asks him to compliment her nails, and as Koichi is about to (mostly out of fear) he suddenly gets teleported a few feet away from where he was standing. Okuyasu is then shown to be standing nearby. I don’t know if this was a reference to him being jealous of Koichi getting confessed to in the manga, but either way it was pretty funny. 

--Josuke asks Tomoko why she never got married, to which she replies that she’s never been able to fall for guys. She says there was only one man she ever loved and it was Josuke’s father. I may be off on this next part (my Japanese is iffy sometimes) but then she says that Josuke is a lot like his father/ reminds her a lot of his father. Josuke laughs a bit and then says that he thinks he takes more after Ryohei (and her? I’m not sure) 

References to other parts of the series:

--Near the beginning of the movie, Koichi straightens his “Pink Dark Boy” comics on his shelf, and also hangs a “Pink Dark Boy” poster on his wall. 

--Tomoko mentions that she went to a cute new Italian cafe called “Trattoria Trussardi” and says that she and Josuke should go together sometime. 

That’s all I can think of for right now! 

As for my thoughts on the movie, I loved it! I don’t think it’s a perfect movie, but it’s clear a lot of effort went into it to make it as close to the original material as possible while still being it’s own thing. The Stands all looked really good in opinion, especially The Hand and Echoes. The only one that was a little iffy occasionally was Star Platinum, who was a little uncanny at times because of his more human features. Crazy Diamond also looked really good. 

Again, I thought it was great. Maybe the pacing was a bit off at some points, but altogether I thought it was a great adaptation and I really really hope that they’re able to make Chapter 2. I’ve heard that the movie isn’t doing too well in the Japanese box office which is unfortunate...Hopefully things will pick up soon with the Sendai Jojo fest starting on Saturday! 

So finally, TLDR: The movie is great, the stands looked good, things had to be changed but it was for the best, and actors and actresses all did a fantastic job <3

[jotatetsuken]

Jotaro Kujo Valentine’s Drabble

Prompts: “I need just one date.” “You think you can woo me with just one date?” “Absolutely.”

Thank you so much @creativepromptsforwriting for these lovely prompts <3 @creativepromptfills it’s okay to reblog ^_^

Features: Jotaro Kujo x Reader

Scenario: An AU where Joseph, Avdol, Polnareff, Kakyoin, and Jotaro meet the reader in Japan and complete different missions before setting off on their biggest mission in Egypt. Also, Jotaro, Kakyoin, and the reader are adults here (of Polnareff’s age)

Warning: Suggestive scenes (if you're a minor and/or uncomfortable, best to stay away, or block #shyna suggestives :D), mention of injury and loss of blood, Jotaro being a teeny bit of OOC, maybe?

A/N: Happy Valentine's Day, lovelies <3 I didn't realize that Jotaro's birthday had an official date according to some websites. Also, he being my current anime boyfriend has gotten me to dream about him in my subconscious. Gaah, I love this guy. Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day and Happy belated birthday, JoJo Baby <33

Number of words: 991 ( lol it was supposed to be a drabble, oh well idc it is a Drabble xD)

Taglist: @saltyvanilla @akaashi-todorki @pencilpoked-heart @tiddieluvr @quirrrky @fuwushiguro @kagejima @ofallthingswhythis

Let me know here if you want to join my tag list for future posts, and also, for suggestions (for AUs, characters as per the character rules) and feedback regarding my writing :D

Song: Harleys in Hawaii by Katy Perry

Joseph turns to Jotaro and me and asks, “Jotaro, (Y/N), what about you guys? How much money do you have with you?” Polnareff taunted us with a smirk, “Yeah, how much do you have? Kakyoin has 85 Singapore Dollars and I have 90.”Jotaro and I smirked back with him replying, “Ah, well, I still have 2000 Singapore Dollars.” I continued, saying, “and I have 3000 Singapore Dollars. So, guess who's going to have dinner in a fancy restaurant now?”

I glance at Jotaro, who nods and lightly chuckles along with me. Polnareff's eyes widen in shock. Avdol drags him along, saying, “Now, now, let them rest. They fought the most, after all.” We laughed as they were walking away, much to their chagrin, and as Jotaro looked in the other direction, Avdol gave a knowing smile and a thumbs up, reminding me as to why I needed to make the most of this.

When Jotaro and I first met through Avdol, our personalities were too opposite for us to understand each other. We'd argue for hours on end, even when we were forced to live as roommates. But, after our first mission together, when we went back to our hotel rooms, it's safe to say that Avdol and Joseph could hear a plethora of moans, groans, and grunts coming from our room.

What started as a way of relieving stress for us, became a means of expressing that we were getting addicted and accustomed to each other's touch, voices, and presence. It definitely seemed like a toxic way of bonding, but with us finding it difficult to get along initially, it definitely seemed like the best way out. However, on the last mission, before we set out to Singapore on our way to Egypt, a sword pierced through my stomach, causing me to lose a lot of blood. I remember before closing my eyes, that Jotaro was the first person to approach me and pick me up.

When I opened my eyes, I realized we were in the hospital, and the operation was successful and I was going to recover in a week. I was in the room with Jotaro beside me and holding my hand. “You’re awake,” he replies with a smile on his face and I noticed his eyes were baggy and the tears had dried off his cheeks. I smile at him and reply softly, “hi.” He approaches me, holds my head, and places a chaste kiss on my lips. When we pull away from the kiss, he tells me, “okay, Ms. (F/N) (L/N), as soon as you get out of the hospital, we’re going on a date okay?”

I was flabbergasted by his response and I said, “I didn’t know Mr. Jotaro Kujo can be open about his feelings. Since when did that happen?” He facepalms and replies, “Yare yare, since I thought I was going to lose you, woman. You scared me.” I chuckle, perch myself up with my elbows and I respond, “Okay then, mister. A date, you say?” He nods in agreement and smiles, “I just need one date.” I raise my eyebrow at him and ask him, “You think you can woo me with one date?” He brings his face closer to mine, kisses my forehead, and replies, “absolutely.”

As Jotaro looked in my direction, he cupped my cheek with one of his hands and asked, “Okay, so (F/N) where do you want to eat?” while caressing my cheek. As a tint of blush appears on my cheeks, I shrugged and replied, “well, there's this steak restaurant 10 minutes away. Want to walk there?” Jotaro smirked and replied, “I have a better idea,” and he pulls me to a corner of the street where there was a Harley Davidson CVO Road Glide in front of us. My mouth opens wide and my eyes widen as I turn to him and ask, “Jotaro, how, how did you get this? When did you get this?” He heaves a sigh and replies, “ah well, I asked the old man for some money,” his eyes looking down on the ground.

I put my arms around him, tilt my head to the left and ask him softly, “Jotaro, what did you tell Joseph?” He takes off his cap and ruffles his hair, replying,“ yare, yare, how does it matter? I told him that I wanted to...” his voice trailing into the air as he looks in another direction so as to hide the tint of blush that appeared on his cheeks, “take you out on a date.” My eyes widen as I look at him and tell him, “oh, it's funny because I was asking Avdol's advice on the same thing,” and I chuckle while slightly biting my bottom lip. Both of us look at each other and laugh. Then he put his cap back up and said, “so both of them are helping us. Do they know?”

I replied with another shrug, “I don’t know. But if that's the case, why don't we make the most of it? We could go to an aquarium, explore it, have a nice dinner at the steak restaurant, and go back to the room and watch a movie. It's Valentine's Day, after all.” Jotaro then clicks his tongue, responding, “The date was supposed to be my idea.” He then picks me up, gives me the helmet, puts me behind him, and sits on the Harley as he replies, “However, I’m glad that you’re alive and with me. That is something I wouldn’t trade for anything in this world.” As I put my helmet and put my arms around my waist, and place my chin on his shoulder, I say with a smile, “Happy Valentine’s Day, JoJo.” He then smiles as he starts the motorcycle, with the biggest smile I think I’ve ever seen, and softly replies, “Happy Valentine’s Day, baby.” I guess he did woo me before our first date began.

© Shyna 2022

[sarazanmai]

Thoughts on the “Sailor Moon Crystal” English dub. Season two episode one.

she’s gonna pop a cap in her ass

“ah its just a toy...you scared the hell out of me!” I like how genuinely upset he sounds

like in the 90s version (and I did watch the Viz dub of that episode) he came off more annoyed, but I prefer this

Moon Pride is still here.....okay

I don’t hate Moon Pride, I just thought they were using a different song

the reason I’m fine with the 90s anime recycling Moonlight Densetsu is because that song is iconic

in the place of Beryl and the Shitennou we have the Black Moon clan though and Chibi-Usa and Sailor Pluto (!!!) replaced Queen Serenity, which makes sense

seeing Prince Demande has already left my vagina desert wasteland

I have plenty of time to dig into why he always bothered me, but for now I will admit that he made for an appropriate villain given how feminist the series is

he’s basically Naoko’s way of warning you about obsessive and entitled men much like Gaston from Beauty and the Beast

so Demande is played by Matthew Mercer, he’s played by Jotaro Kujo

Saphir looks hot

he’s voiced by Lyon Smith who doesn’t have much to his name, but hopefully he builds himself a good career

WISEMAN WHAT HAPPENED!?

okay so the weird vocal distortion from the Dic dub is gone, that’s good, but....what the hell?

he’s played by Steve Kramer, an actor with credits in Power Rangers and many other shows

he was the Third Hokage from Naruto and frankly that voice would work here, but he made Wiseman sound like a charming old man which...maybe could work as he’s a manipulator but its weird

I don’t wanna blame Kramer for this since I know he has talent (look at his filmography, its massive) maybe this was what the line director wanted like doing this more subtly evil thing but right now its just strange

Rubeus is voiced by Steve Cannon (sometimes credited as Steve Staley) who was Toshiro Hitsugaya in Bleach and Neji in Naruto

also I can’t help but wonder if Rubeus’s design (and Hawk’s Eye’s) influenced Togashi when he created Hisoka, I mean....yeah

holy shit this scene is a who’s who of the villain voices

Petz is voiced by an actress named Jessica Gee who plays Mylene in Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir (I don’t watch it, but it seems worth mentioning)

Koan (who was always my favorite of the sisters) is voiced by Eden Riegel who was on All My Children and The Young and the Restless

I like her voice

I see Steve is just as overly proper sounding as he was when he played Neji

chee-bee Usagi

I know that’s likely the accurate way of saying it, but it sounds kinda weird hearing it in English

this is a stupid ass nitpick, but I wish she was saying Mama instead of Mommy

“I think I just had a vision” yeah in this version you have a lot of those, but don’t worry none of them will inspire you to break up with Usagi because you somehow came to the conclusion that would keep her safe (fuck. that. arc.)

“well we were at the park and she kinda just fell out of the sky” I snorted

“what a precious little thing” no...she’s not...

so I don’t hate Chibi-Usa like I did as a kid, I get why she acts the way she does, its just she still has these moments that annoy me though I will admit manga Chibi-Usa is marginally less annoying than the 90s anime version

Luna-P is such a deus ex machina and I don’t even care

“a secret love child perhaps?” you’re getting warmer

I don’t know if the reveal with her was a genuine surprise to people back in the day (after DBZ I’m not sure why that would be), but when I got into Sailor Moon I went in a very weird inconsistent order so in a way I always knew

where does Luna get the pens and stuff? fuck if I know

Asanuma looks like what would happen if Haruka and Jadeite had a baby

“you know him from school?” its funny because this question implies she never considered Mamoru having friends (he kinda doesn’t...)

Asanuma is so gay for Mamoru that they actually call attention to it

meanwhile we get our first look at Rei’s school where EVERYONE is gay for her

like remember the side story where Minako visited her school and a girl was giving Rei cookies she baked for her? that was adorable

Rei’s attempt to regain her poised image after acting like Usagi has always been cute

if I were to cosplay as a Sailor Moon villain I’d be Koan

“you can’t come along pipsqueak” damn

I’m happy they kept that brief moment of Luna and Luna-P

something I will give the 90s anime is that they used the Ayakashi Sisters more and redeemed them

and I never understood why Rei, a Shinto priestess, went to a Catholic school

transformation filler time!

overall I will admit I like how the 90s anime handled this arc, in terms of all of them I think its the one they did the best

“they just went from holy to creepy”

Koan looks so cute

I feel like this battle is kinda rushed though

I always liked the Moon Rod, glad they colored it this way (because the coloring they did on the Moon Stick and Holy Grail still bugs me)

“well done Sailor Moon!” the way he says this is hilarious, I can’t even describe it

I don’t watch YOI, but with his haircut Demande looks like that cute blond guy from it (only ya know a scumbag)

nyoom

closing is the same

tune in next time where Chibi-Usa wonders if her mom can save her mom and explores her unrecognized hangups towards her father

[duhragonball]

Dragon Ball Z 201

Last episode, Gohan started attending high school in Satan City, but Satan City is riddled with crime, and Gohan’s afraid if he beats up too many criminals with his super powers, it’ll make his social life awkward.   I really don’t understand why he’s so worried.    Everyone thinks Mr. Satan has super powers, and he seems to do all right.  

Anyway, he goes to Capsule Corp. to consult Bulma on the problem, and she mulls it over while smoking a cigarette.    This is one of those little details that you don’t really think about much, but it’s something that you just don’t see in modern anime.    I’m pretty sure Bulma’s only smoking here as a callback to her father, Dr. Brief, who often smoked and had a similar hairstyle back in the day.    I mean, he still does, it’s not like he died or anything.   My point is that you never see Bulma smoking in the 2010′s, even though those episodes and movies are set only a few years after this one. 

I’m pretty sure that’s because Japanese television adopted stricter rules between 1993 and 2010.  Did this scene make it into Dragon Ball Kai?   I bet it didn’t.   The only recent example of a smoking anime character is Jotaro Kujo from JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure, and they obscured it with shadow every time he lit up.   Then again, Lisa Lisa smoked in full view, so maybe it’s just because Jotaro was a minor?    Nonetheless, I feel like smoking has been heavily de-emphasized in media throughout my lifetime.   It used to be commonplace, and now it seems like creators will avoid smoking altogether.    I don’t know if it’s because they just don’t want to use it, or if there’s external pressure to avoid it.    It’s a good thing, either way.     I remember watching an “I Love Lucy” episode once where the four main characters all just sort of stopped talking so they could light up and get their cigarettes started, like that was a perfectly acceptable use of airtime.  

Bulma’s solution is to make Gohan a disguise that he can change into at the push of a button.    Gohan is amazed that such a thing is even possible, but she says she can knock it out in two hours.  

While she works on that, Gohan goes to hang out with Trunks.   Not the one from the future, but the baby we last saw in Episode 193.

Trunks just started training with Vegeta, who feels he’s old enough to learn from him.  So naturally he puts in an appearance and chastises Gohan for losing his edge in peacetime.   

This episode was a big deal to me when I first watched it in 2001.   By then, I was invested enough in DBZ that I couldn’t wait for Cartoon Network to air the post-Cell Games stuff, so I started buying the tapes.   I think this episode would have been on the third one I got, and it serves as our first look at the cast seven years after the Cell Games.   Until now, all we’ve seen are Chi-Chi, Gohan, and Mr. Satan.   

Also, I was genuinely fascinated to see what Vegeta would say or do in a scene like this.    He and Gohan never interacted much in the first place, and he was a huge dick during most of that time, and the last time we saw Vegeta, he seemed to be at a crossroads.    He declared that he’d never fight again, but what would he do instead?  In this episode, we finally get a semblance of an answer.    He’s been living here, with Bulma, training the whole time, and now he’s planning to train Trunks.    As far as Gohan is concerned, he seems to regard him with a certain degree of respect, warning him that he can’t afford to get flabby.   

Later, Bulma finishes Gohan’s super-suit, which includes gloves and boots from Vegeta’s wardrobe. 

Gohan’s thrilled with it, but Trunks isn’t.   Earlier, he asked if Bulma could make him a costume, but now he’s taking it back.   

On his way home, Gohan passes through Satan City again and decides to give the outfit a test run when he spots a reckless driver.     Look, if I had a muscle-car that was bright yellow and the number 69 on it, I’d drive like a madman too.    This is why I’m not cut out to be a judge.   

The guys ask Gohan who he is, since his ridiculous outfit doesn’t tell them anything, and he pauses to consider what his superhero name should be.   At last he settles on “The Great Saiyaman,” and he does this elaborate pose to emphasize it.    

Hearing this, the two men laugh hysterically, until Gohan gets upset and stomps the roadhard enough to break the pavement.    They quickly apologize and promise to drive safely.  Score one for justice.    

Gohan returns home and Chi-Chi hates his outfit.    Is it really that much different from what anyone else in this show has worn so far?   I mean, Chi-Chi used to wear a cape and a helmet herself.    Does she just think Gohan’s suit doesn’t show enough bare skin?

But Goten loves the Great Saiyaman outfit, so that’s something.    Wait, who?

As Gohan flies to school the next day, the narrator fills us in.    Basically Goku got Chi-Chi pregnant right before he went off to fight Cell, so nine months later she gave birth to this kid and named him Goten.    Of course, if you’re only watching the anime, you would have already seen the boy by now, because he’s all over the new opening credits.  

With his new costume, Gohan can just fly to school under his own power, land on the roof, and  change back to his normal outfit with the touch of a button on his watch.   He says this will save him from having to use Kinto’un to make his commute, but why was he ever using it in the first place?  It’s not like he could let people see that either, right?   Or did Gohan think Kinto’un wouldn’t be that big a deal?

In class, a couple of students are already talking about the new superhero, although they get his name wrong.   I guess “Tireman” does sound a lot like “Saiyaman” if you pronounce it “SIGH-a-man”, like they do in Japanese.    I don’t know why the dub changed it from “SIGH-an” to “SAY-an,” but whatever.   

Anyway, Gohan angrily corrects them on the proper name, and then he has to make up some story to explain how he would know this.    The story here is that Gohan’s so wrapped up in playing a superhero that he keeps forgetting why he wanted the secret identity in the first place.    What does he care if people get the name wrong?     As long as they’re not calling him “Son Gohan”, it works.  

Later, Videl gets a call on her wristwatch, because everyone has a magic watch, apparently.     There’s a hostage situation on a tour bus, so she has to excuse herself from class to go deal with it.   

Gohan doesn’t understand, so Sharpner explains that Videl assists the authorities in crises like these.    She’s basically following in the footsteps of her father, Mr. Satan, and Sharpner assures Gohan that she’s about as strong as her dad is, so she’s more than capable of handling these situations.  

But Gohan doesn’t buy that, because the last time he saw Mr. Satan, he got beat by Cell in one hit.   Okay, yeah, but Perfect Cell is a long way from a gang of busjackers, you know.   I’m not sure Gohan fully appreciates that distinction, though the irony still shines through.   It seemed harmless at the time to allow Mr. Satan to take credit for defeating Cell.   Gohan clearly never waned the accolade.   He’s worried about people finding out he foiled that bank robbery in the last episode.  But Mr. Satan’s faux heroism has now inspired Videl to try to become an actual hero, and she might not be as lucky as her father.   

So Gohan excuses himself to go to the restroom and decides to back up Videl as Great Saiyaman........ except he doesn’t know where the bus terminal is.   

Meanwhile, at the bus terminal... HAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT IS WITH THIS GUY?    Why is he covering his entire face with his bandit mask?    How does he see what he’s doing?    What’s with the chicken hat?   This is insane, and it’s great.  

The bus they’ve taken over is full of old people, who seem unconcerned about being used as hostages.    I think the deal here is that these guys just got done robbing a bank, then fled to this bus when the cops came after them, and now they’re hoping to use the bus to escape.   

I feel like this is some sort of anime trope, with senior citizen tourists being completely unworried about what’s going on around them.    I’m mostly thinking of that episode of Hellsing Ultmate where Alucard and Father Anderson were about to throw down in a museum until Seras led a tour group between them to defuse the situation.    

Anyway, this lackadaisical attitude irritates the crooks, but they still pose for a photo when asked.   

Then Videl arrives in the air vehicle she uses for these situations.  

So basically, Videl doesn’t have super powers OR a costume, and she just flies into a situation and starts whooping ass whenever she gets a call on her watch.  What exactly is she doing that the cops couldn’t have done?    I mean, at least they had guns.   

So Videl jumps on the bus and crashes through the wndow and starts opening up a can of whoop-ass on these guys.    She’s basically Batman without the suit, which is pretty awesome.   

Then one of the old people takes a photo of her, and she blushes.    Awwww. 

Unfortunately, Videl was so busy kicking butt that she failed to notice no one was driving the bus as it rolled off a cliff.     But Gohan’s here in time to catch it, and everything’s okay.   

And I guess this puts Videl’s character into perspective.    A lot of critics point out that she never really got any development as a fighter.   When she appears in video games, they usually have Gohan or Great Saiyaman show up to help her as part of her finishing move.   I think a lot of fans, especially female ones, wanted to see Videl train until she got strong enough to hang with the Z-Fighters, and it just never happened.  

But, I mean, this is her second appearance, and the debut of the idea of Videl as a crimefighting heroine, and she’s already gotten in over her head.    She’s not nearly as goofy as Mr. Satan, but she’s more like him than the audience might care to admit.    As impressive as she was on that bus, she nearly got herself killed.

Gohan introduces himself as the Great Saiyaman and she’s as put off by his costume and poses as everyone else so far.    Then Gohan addresses her by name and flies off.   

Videl’s all like “How does he know my name?”    But doesn’t everyone in town know Videl?    The people on the bus recognized her.   The crooks recognized her, which was why they opened fire as soon as she landed on the bus.   Why wouldn’t a new superhero know her?  

So Gohan’s pretty pleased with himself, and the narrator assures us that Gohan’s secret won’t be exposed, right?     Right?    You’re shaking your head, why is that?