#guys I’m so gay it’s a problem

[blueberrymango]

GUYS HE’S THE LOVE OF MY LIFE?!?

I MENTIONED AQUARIUMS ONCE AND HE DECIDED TO TAKE ME?!?

WE SEND PICS IF OUR CATS AND PETS BACK AND FOURTH?!?

HES FANTASTIC WITH CHILDREN!!?

HES RESPECTFULLY AND THANKS DOOR HOLDERS!!??

HE’S REALLY HOT AND PRETTY AND ADORABLE?!???

HE INVITED MY STUPID ASS TO A PROFESSIONAL ASS MINECRAFT SERVER?!??

HE GAVE ME BONES!!!!!!!

I’m deceased.

(Since I accidentally found his tumblr, and incidentally his deepest darkest secretes, I thought I’d go on a little romantic rant myself.)

(I’m seriously in a fanfic trope rn. Or a gay romance)

[deswhomst]

Can someone please just rant with me about the people who hate on Jegulus LMAO? And I don’t mean people who don’t ship them (it’s fine that’s your choice), I mean the ones who make posts about their hatred of the ship. And on top of that, why are they tagging their posts Jegulus? I literally don’t want to see it. Keep it to yourself.

Like—first of all, why do they act like it’s such a hot take or an unpopular opinion? I see one person daily say that Jegulus “doesn’t make sense” and they pretend like it’s such a new thing to say?? And why do they act like they’re victims when they’re the toxic ones?

I swear I see so many toxic Jily stans openly hating on Jegulus like it’s their birth right but I have literally never seen it the other way around. Like no I’ll be brave and ask the real question—what is so interesting about Jily? Why does liking that ship make you superior? And I’ll just say—even Harry wondered how Lily ended up with James so your arguments that “they probably hated each other” / “doesn’t make sense” literally applies to Jily as well. And this is not hate to Jily in any way, but rather to toxic stans who spread hate for no reason. You are not better than someone else based on your shipping preference, but you are worse when you act a certain way.

Also I love all you non-toxic Jily stans out there! <3 I promise this is not directed at you at all.

And don’t give me the reasoning that they created Harry. Frankly if your argument for a ship is their off-spring, it’s already weak.

[bludhavensbirdboy]

I 😭😭 miss 😭😭 the 😭😭 moustache 😭😭😭

[mishtershpock]

.

[britcision]

So this is pretty much what it looks like when I’m world building with the partner

————

Partner: so I want Evil Tony Stark to have this magic painting of a door that opens into a dark little room to keep my boy in when he’s naughty or inconvenient

Me: oh yes very good. And it’s not like the frame is the door, you open the painting of the door into another dimension

Partner: yeah he’s gotta be able to take it away with him so he can have it on command 😈

Me: okay so how I think this works is he paints the room inside it first to make the interdimensional space, and then paints the door closed over it, so he can paint whatever he wants in the room 🤔

Partner: oh yeah that’s cool, so he can put furniture or a happy little tree in 😋

Me, suddenly vibrating: okay but no he actually paints a Happy Little Tree and it’s just a tree in the corner of this completely dark room that just giggles softly all the time 🫠

Partner: …. And we tell the party as a joke the first time about this old cell the boy was in with a happy lil tree 😏

Me: and then we don’t say anything for like 2 years and then one of them gets put in the dark room and they just hear giggling 🤩

————

Or

————

Partner: okay so Evil Tony Stark mostly uses constructs and stuff for servants so we’ll put the Robotery in the basement for those 🤖

Me: okay, and when y’all go back to the abandoned mansion do you want there to be one left behind? 🙂

Partner: fuck yeah and the boy knows all of them he loves little creatures (and the house mimics) 🥰

Me: and since the boy was intentionally left behind, this is probably a construct that was doing something related to him so it’s probably reasonably aesthetic, yea? Like feeding him or dressing him up? 😇

(The boy was being kept as a pet by Evil Tony Stark because he glows for Fey Reasons and was pretty literally a living sculpture for 11 years and they did not exactly worry about the “living” part much)

Partner: yeah, if Evil Tony Stark is gonna see it around it’s gotta be aesthetic ✨

Me: so you find this cute sweet little construct friend and then you go a little further into the room and just see hundreds of partially or fully deconstructed bodies of this exact little guy and most of them are just minorly different aesthetics because Evil Tony Stark just trashes them when he wants a new look

Also one is still just barely alive and that’s because it’s one of the ones with a person’s soul bound to it and they’ve just been cuddling in the dark for months since they were abandoned 🥰

————

This just happens in the winter okay I become Extremely Fucking Ominous for literally no reason and then it’s Horror Time

Most of our world building is him making cool and interesting places and characters and then me sneaking in sideways like “hey what if they’re also super fucked up 👀”

And to be fair he loves it and he always says yes please and helps me fuck them up more

Anyway we laid the groundwork for Lord Meldacio’s mansion today that the party are gonna get to in a couple weeks and I had so much fun this guy is the fucking bomb

[jammyshouse]

finally accepting i am a gay man rather than whatever i thought i was is explaining a lot about everything to the point it’s actually making me angry. like man. man i guess it was very fucking obvious to everyone except me huh

[exopelagic]

honk shoo.

[sunsoak]

Everyone’s all “nonbinary is included in every sexuality” until a nonbinary person who is on hormones prefers men who like men and women who like women and all of a sudden I’m being problematic and offensive to…….. well everyone I guess

[a-grey-mess]

do you, as a trans queer man, ever get like a serious crush on straight sports boys with biblical names who would call you a slur for a couple laughs and would hate crime you for fun but one time his friend ran into you on accident and he was making fun of his friend and was like “goddamn it connor get your shit together and apologize to him right now” and you know he wasn’t being serious but it gave you butterflies and now it’s been like a year and you still get butterflies when he talks but he doesn’t know your name even though you have exactly one class together and have never spoken beyond that one time but he comes into your english class to hang out with the teacher and you’ve made eye contact like three times so he’s clearly in love with you but also laughed when a guy handed you a razor blade and said “here, kill yourself with it faggot” so you don’t know how to feel about him also he has a mullet and pickup truck so clearly boyfriend material

[starved-vyka]

Slept at 6am woke up at 9am. Stayed up playing video games and watching Netflix. What the ever loving fuck is wrong with me.

[luumenss]

got likes to play funny little tricks on me (giving me a condition that makes strokes more likely and giving me a different condition where one my pupils is much bigger, a common sign of strokes)

[teratophool]

I am once again sexually frustrated and am about to lose my mind. /gen

[the-obnoxious-sibling]

(thinking about this post a bit)

“You weren’t asking me to move in with you,” Tommy said with a terrible, sad smile. “You were asking your boyfriend.”

Buck squinted, confused. “You… are my boyfriend?” That strained smile somehow became more terrible, and Buck realized he’d slipped up.  “Were. Were my boyfriend.”

Tommy sighed. “Quick pop quiz for you, then. Name three of your former boyfriend’s hobbies.”

Bucks brow furrowed deeper, but for the moment he decided to play along. “Uh, movies? Basketball. MMA, Muay Thai, stuff like that.”

Tommy nodded. “Full points. Now, basketball is not something I play at home, so that’s not relevant, and I can see exactly where my DVD collection would fit, no problem.  Muay Thai, though… where does my equipment go, here?  My mat and bag? And, hey, here’s a hobby you didn’t mention: tinkering with classic cars.  Where does my car lift go, Buck?  Because it sure can’t go in that parking space out front.”

Buck felt his face starting to go red, and dropped his eyes.  “You’ve made your point,” he mumbled.

“Have I?  And what is that, then?”

“That I wasn’t thinking about you, when I asked you to move in.”

“No, you weren’t,” Tommy agreed.  “The same way you weren’t thinking about me when you talked about this cool, confident, comfortable gay guy you admire.  I didn’t come out until after gay marriage was legalized, Buck.  There’s nothing impressive about how many people I hurt—myself included—by being unable to live with my truth.  And I don’t—I don’t have gay friends, you know?  I’m not in the community that way. I’m not an activist; I don’t even go to Pride.  That guy you were talking about—he does sound admirable.  He sounds great.” Tommy’s voice cracked.  “But he doesn’t sound like me.”

Unable to bear the silence, Buck fidgeted with his shirtsleeve and asked, “So… that’s why you broke up with me?  Because I didn’t know you well enough?”

Tommy looked away. “I broke up with you because that conversation made it very clear to me that you were falling for some better version of Tommy Kinard that you’d made up in your head.  And maybe I contributed to that. We never really discussed heavy topics much, not even our dating histories.” Buck chuckled a little at the reference, and for a split second Tommy smiled for real. It hurt to see, and hurt more to see it so briefly. “But I knew. Even if I pointed out that my things wouldn’t fit in your loft, and we had a little laugh about it and decided to look for a new place to move into together… living together would force you to see who I really am.  And you weren’t going to love that guy.”

Buck blinked back tears. “Y-you don’t know that.  I don’t know that.”

“I do, though.”  Tommy smiled thinly, his eyes wet.  “No one’s ever loved that guy.”

(eta: cont'd)

[that-nerd-who-writes-fanfiction]

I’m not usually one for miscommunication as a trope but hear me out:

Arthur thinks he and Merlin are together because Merlin says shit like “you’re my destiny” and “two sides of the same coin” fairly often.

He even looks fond or proud whenever he calls Arthur a prat, and pet names never suited them. He considered it once but it just felt weird. “Idiot.” Changed to “Idiot <3” when they finally got together and that suits them much better than Darling or Babe or whatever else.

And it’s not like he doesn’t say romantic stuff back, all: “you’re the bravest man I ever met.” Or “you’re the best friend I have and I couldn’t bare to lose you”

Meanwhile, Merlin pinpoints the same moment Arthur believed they started dating as when Arthur started acting more affectionate and Merlin’s crush got dialled up to 11.

Arthur doesn’t seem to mind, so he pushes his luck occasionally and will hug Arthur after a long day or will lean on him if they’re eating together on a hunting trip. Merlin absolutely cherishes these moments, but he’s secretly wishing they meant as much to Arthur as they do to him. (Spoiler alert: they do.)

So they must be together, Merlin just can’t be bothered with titles and with everything that happened, Agravane and Morgana betraying him, it would be ideal to wait for an announcement of their relationship.

He gifts Merlin clothes, new boots, will leave flowers in his chambers and asked for the cook to make more of Merlin’s favourites so he can steal food from Arthur’s plate because he claims it tastes better when it isn’t his food.

Arthur gave Merlin his mother’s sigil, for crying out loud. They’re obviously together.

And even better, (you can pry demi or ace Arthur from my cold dead hands) they don’t even need to be intimate beyond the occasional hug or soft gestures like Merlin brushing the hair from his face before Arthur goes to sleep at night and Arthur doing the same whenever they’re not in the castle and sleeping next to each other. He was worried at first, but Merlin never expected it, which Arthur just takes as: “And how stupid to worry? who knows him better than Merlin? Of course he would already know Arthur didn’t feel comfortable with that sort of stuff.”

Then one day, a delegation comes to Camelot and one of the foreign knights is flirting with Merlin. Arthur sees, and he doesn’t usually feel any need to act on his jealousy because he trusts Merlin, but this knight isn’t flirting in the way Gwaine does that’s just part of who he is, and Merlin looks uncomfortable. So he calls Merlin over to him, starts acting like a prat, and keeps Merlin “busy” all night by keeping his goblet full or usual servants duties.

Then later, Merlin thanks Arthur but says he doesn’t need to worry and he can handle himself. Arthur, finally relaxing after being ready to start a fight for the past three hours, pulls Merlin into a hug and kisses his forehead, because let the medieval gays be soft sometimes. He whispers something like, “I know you don’t like talking about it, and that you’ve said you don’t need a title, but you shouldn’t have to handle everything on your own.”

Merlin pulls back, looking shocked and confused. Then they actually have to talk about everything.

Merlin’s just fine with actually dating the guy he’s got a massive crush on and now he’s more willing to instigate hugs and affection. (Arthur just thought Merlin wasn’t going to push him to not make him uncomfortable but secretly wishes that he would instigate more) They end up sleeping in the same bed in Camelot too, because cuddles and softness, something Arthur wanted for a while but didn’t know how to ask for.

Basically all the problems in the relationship that Arthur was worried about but kinda felt “it’s already more than I could hope for” so didn’t want to bring up get worked out naturally and Merlin, who was previously worried about his friendship getting ruined if they changed the dynamic too much, is shocked by how little actually changed now that they’re together. He just gets to hold Arthur’s hand, can be less subtle about stealing from his dinner, gets to relax and gets an Arthur that’s more clingy and soft now that Merlin knows he’s allowed to reciprocate affection.

They still tease each other, they’re still two idiots sharing a braincell that they occasionally give to Leon to babysit, they’re just more open about being in love now. (More open to each other, anyway. Literally everyone else in Camelot knew long before they did)

Bonus points if they’ve been talking about their relationship and having the important conversation with each other the entire time, just without actually talking about it. Merlin asking why Arthur suddenly changed how affectionate he is and Arthur saying he thought he was allowed. Merlin’s just like “cool, as long as you’re okay. I’m glad you’re feeling more comfortable and relaxed.” And glad there’s no love spells or anything sinister going on. Arthur says he doesn’t like Merlin flirting with Gwaine, even if he doesn’t mean it, and Merlin agrees to stop if it makes him uncomfortable. He doesn’t think too much into it, just thinks Arthur doesn’t like the casual flirting and believes that relationships are important so casual stuff isn’t super comfortable. Merlin is still friends with Gwaine, just makes less jokes about going home with or marrying him.

Like, they’re having entire conversations and maintaining a fully functional healthy relationship, they’re just fucking idiots at the same time.

[gregmarriage]

yeah yeah, romelukas should fuck, but also ‘roman roy’ and ‘fucking’ sounds like an oxymoron. that being said, i hope they do fuck nasty and i hope it doesn’t fix roman in any way, in fact, i hope it makes him worse.

[colorlessjay]

Oh my Jack, I’m obsessed with your BTTF AU.

I know it might not quite fit into your AU but I’ve been giggling to myself about the potential hilarious misunderstandings. My fav being s6 Dean attempts to put together all the little clues Cas has dropped about his husband but like comically wrong (plugged-all-the-numbers-into-the-right-formula-and-somehow-got-the-wrong-answer wrong)

Dean in the guest bedroom with sticky notes and red string: ok so he wears flannels and he has an Impala that looks suspiciously like baby and cas mentioned he had hair longer than mine and that he was a hunter and Sam and I knew him and they were friends for a while before anything romantic happened, and I’m clearly not hanging out with cas as much …

Dean (having a panic attack): son of a bitch I know who cas is married to!

Dean (mopey and despondent and slightly horrified the next day and definitely not with puffy eyes): Cas, I, I have to know, your husband, it’s not *gulp*

Cas (visibly worried he’s given too much away and s6 dean is still so repressed that the bi realization is throwing him into despair)

Dean whispering (trying not to vomit): Sam?

Cas (too stunned to hold back his reaction): *hysterical laughter* oh, no, dean! I’m not married to sam.

Dean (nearly passing out from relief): thank god!

Cas (under his breath): this is why my dean asked me to love him anyways when his past self asked an incredibly stupid question

Honestly I fucking love that so much, I think I have a way to shoe horn that into the AU

kinda like this:

It's been two days

It's been two days stuck in the future, and Dean feels frustration bubbling up in him as his brain tries to puzzle piece everything together

It doesn't help that Cas won't tell him shit

Best friend my ass!

Okay, maybe he's being a bit of an asshole saying that. Cas- This Cas has been nothing but a great host. He always has food in the fridge, he has extra clothes he lets Dean borrow, he doesn't get all up in Dean's personal space like his Castiel does

But at the same time, Cas keeps giving him these looks, like he knows something Dean doesn't

which sure, yeah, he knows a whole hell of a lotta things. It's the future. But Cas us smug about it. At least it feels like he's smug about it. It doesn't help that Cas is out of his holy tax accountant get up and dresses like a regular John. Least his taste in band shirts has improved thanks to his husband

Husband

yeah, that still causes a record scratch in Dean's brain every time he thinks about it

And he's got no problems with it! Love is love and all that. Who Cas wants to take home and put a ring on is his own business. It's not like Cas is a guy, he's an angel. A beam of holy light or whatever. So technically, he's not gay (Not that Dean would have a problem with that!). But it does make his husband some kind of monsterfucker

which is also totally fine. Cas is a catch. Good for both of them

So why doesn't Cas say who his husband is?

Is he scared Dean would judge him? Well fuck him for that! Dean's not a homophobe! And Cas is his best friend! He'd be supportive of him and his monsterfucker husband! Rainbow streamers with Cthulhu and all!

Unless Cas is more worried about Dean's reaction to who he's married to...

which is dumb. From what little Cas told him about Mr. Mystery (Cas refuses to tell him his last name), he wears a shit ton of plaid flannels, he cooks a lot with Cas, likes to read (a guess he got from the 'shared library' Cas showed him), is pretty handy around the house, has long stupid hair and loves his dog Miracle...

Holy shit

Dean was on his feet before he even knew what he was doing. He practically kicks down the guest room door and runs around the house looking for that damn Angel/half angel/not angel

He finds Cas in the backyard with Miracle, playing fetch on the wide stretch of land he owns

Cas looks all too comfortable in his loose, light washed jeans and Metallica shirt, his hair wind swept, probably from running around with Miracle while Dean took a nap.

Cas spots Dean approaching and waves at him with a smile, only to drop both as he sees Dean's determined march

Dean can't blame him. He has no idea what he looks like right not but he knows what he feels

like he's gonna explode

"Dean-" Cas starts but never gets to finish as Dean grabs the future version of his best friend by his shoulders and holds him still, grounding himself as he speaks

"Did you marry Sam?"

The question hung in the nice summer air for around two, three beats. Miracle even pausing where she sat with a stick in her mouth, her little head tilted to the side

Cas' usual stoic face breaks into surprise and Dean holds his breath

Only for Cas, Angel of the Lord, to burst out into an explosive laughter that rocks Dean's entire being

Suddenly Dean has no idea how to react, because Cas is... he's got the biggest, gummiest, most hysterical laugh he's ever seen. It completely transforms his face that Dean is questioning if he's still taking nap, and this was all just some weird dream where he thinks Cas is almost...

cute

Get it together, Winchester!

By the time Dean shakes away his shock, Cas is already on the ground, on his back, clutching his sides as he laughs into the sky like Dean just told the joke of the century

"Hey!" Dean snaps, his face feeling warm for reasons he doesn't have time to think about. "Answer the damn question!"

"No! Hahaha!" Cas says in between laughs, Miracle coming to his side to paw and bark at her owner

"Why the fuck not???"

"No I mean-" Cas takes a deep breath and wheezes, coughing into his fist as he tries to get himself together

Dean grumbles impatiently, popping a squat just to poke at Cas' arm to get him to answer

Eventually Cas' laughter does die down and Dean finds himself staring at just the biggest, smuggest grin he's ever seen on Cas

"I mean no, I did not marry Sam. And I believe he his reaction to you saying that would be much funnier than you asking me" Cas, for the love of God, giggles.

And it shouldn't be cute. Cas is an old man and he's giggling and Dean shouldn't feel... whatever the fuck it is he's feeling right now that's not frustration

But oddly enough he's not frustrated at all

he's relived

Is it because Sam's not gay or because Cas didn't go barking up his brother?

Why does that matter? It shouldn't. Stop thinking about it

"Dean" Cas starts, his laughing having died off and his smile softer as he stares up at Dean "Why do you ask?"

There's... there's a tone to Cas' question that Dean doesn't like. So, he does the one thing he's good at

He pushes himself up and shakes back into himself

"Well you weren't telling me jack, so I thought I'd throw in wild guesses and hope I predict something" A cool lie slip out but even he can tell Cas doesn't buy it

Damn it. Those eyes always seemed to see through him

Cas doesn't call him on his bullshit, but he knows. Dean knows he knows and it bothers him further

"Yes well. Perhaps if you keep guessing, the truth will come out eventually"

"yeah... eventually"

------------

Anyways. Drabble done. Doot doot