#growth never stops

[inarafright]

Random thoughts vent. Maybe this will resonate with some 💕🦇

I think the hardest part of growing for me is really understanding the fact I have needs.. and then advocating for myself...

Like am I asking for too much? And I taking too much space or is asking for time invading your boundaries, your personal time.

And like how am I supposed to ask for help when I'm in crisis?? How do people do that? Lol 😂 ok I'm supposed to reach out to ask for help from friends but like who's appropriate to ask, and when is it becoming too much ...

What do you mean I'm supposed to trust certain people with sensitive vulnerable information??? Who are these people and what's ok to share without oversharring?????

Being hyper independent is hard when trying to listen to your therapist .... I want support, but like do I????

I'm a work in progress.. and I want to keep being better 💕🦇

[mymidwestheart]

[pezhead]

Can we please se the age gap turtles in the future? Like what would they look like in ten years

Here you go~

[seagreenstardust]

“When toxic behavior is portrayed as romantic, it’s problematic. When problematic behavior is portrayed as a character flaw for a character to work through, it’s good storytelling.”

Katsuki Bakugou, my friends.

His behavior was problematic but never once portrayed as romantic at the same time. Katsuki said and did awful abusive things, and he also chose to be better when he was given the chance. If you’re still hung up on chapter 1 Katsuki now then I don’t think you’ve been reading the same story I have.

I can’t speak for everyone, but I’m not shipping Izuku with an irredeemable abuser. I’m shipping him with his most important person. His narrative foil. His childhood friend who made awful mistakes and then made it right when he saw he was wrong. The person Izuku looks up to and strives to emulate, despite their past struggles.

Bakudeku is so good because of how flawed these boys are, and how hard they’ve worked to get over it, and how much they matter to each other after it all

[athina-blaine]

for my money, labru is head and shoulders above other ships involving them simply due to the unmatched yap potential, i imagine them feeding off each other's energy like they're slipstreaming in mario kart until they start going fast enough to break the sound barrier

[wildstar25]

MiqoMarch Day 01 - Introduction

Arsay is not one to boast, but still she would speak of her roles and titles with pride. She saw them as proof of her worth in the world. After a break from facing apocalyptic scenarios, Arsay has begun to learn that she should strive to view herself beyond her accolades.

[spacedlexi]

girlies post incoming!!! 💜🍊

the way these two had no idea what they were doing (clem raising aj. violet leading the school) yet now they support each other and as a team are trying to help each other figure it out together. theyre making it up as they go but they at least know they have each other to rely on for whatever happens next

clem never had all the answers but she was trying her best to not let that show. violet becomes someone clem knows she can rely on no matter what (standing up for her and aj and their place at the school, "when i heard you call for help i didnt even think"), and clem becomes someone violet can rely on in turn (using her experience to help violet lead and protect the school and helping her take care of all these kids). theyre each others ROCKS!!!!!!! THEYRE A TEAM!!!!!!!!!!

honestly one of the reasons letting vi get taken hurts so much is that no matter what she WAS the leader of ericson!! vi (the wallflower that she was) steps up as soon as aj is in trouble to protect him And clem, then continues to fall into that leadership position because its not like anyone else is trying to keep everyone together. and even though she has no idea what shes doing or going to do about the army coming to take them all away, shes still trying her best, and clem helps her figure it out as they begin to lead together as a TEAM!! neither of them would be where they are without the influence of the other (vi stepping up as leader, clem being allowed back in). and you can just..... let her be taken in spite of all that.......... no wonder she was so heartbroken in that cell how could she not be

but if you save her it just solidifies their building relationship. that theyll always have the others back no matter what. and vi solidifies this even further by shooting minnie to save clem. all the little reassuring smiles they give each other.. making sure the other is holding up ok in moments of stress... im gonna go cry now

[guardian-angle22]

Colson Baker (aka Machine Gun Kelly) | December 2021

[apoptoses]

🚨 what do you think is the best and worst thing Armand ever did?

Oh anon strap in, this is gonna get heavy.

Disclaimer: this is my personal read, my own meta, everyone else is entitled to their own takes etc etc

We're gonna start with the worst: everything he did with Louis in iwtv.

Let me explain.

Something that is very common for survivors of trauma that was more psychological in nature and required betraying oneself in order to stay safe is to enter the fawn response. Aka people pleasing. Someone who has learned that they have to pretend to be someone else in order to keep others around them happy and keep themselves safe doesn't just shake that when the threat has ended. They then go on to feel as if they must do that in all future relationships in order to be loved and cared for, and if this goes unchecked then it can manifest into some really damaging behavior.

Things like lying about personal beliefs in order to tell the desired companion what the traumatized person thinks they want to hear, trying to control outcomes of certain situations in order for things to happen that they think will keep the desired companion with them. Someone who is people pleasing ends up saying "Yes I love the thing that you love" to one person, while saying deep down (or to another person) "I actually hate this thing so much".

And while it's understandable why someone who is people pleasing believes they have to act that way, it leads to their companion feeling manipulated when they find out that all the things that were said and done to 'please' them were untrue or done simply to control the situation and keep them around.

(And if it gets really out of control, subconscious behavior can become conscious acts of manipulation)

So with Louis we meet an Armand who says that he cares nothing for god, that if he met a mortal who inspired a lust for life in him once again he would turn that mortal immediately, that he would have turned Madeline himself. As readers we find out this isn't true later, that Armand struggles with his faith, that Armand would rather suffer anything than turn someone else into a vampire. But if we look at his words from a perspective of someone in a fawn response, he's saying those things because he believes that's what Louis needs to hear in order to accept his love and love him back.

And in more overt ways he forces Louis' hand with Madeline by using his influence, because Armand has decided it would be 'good' for Louis to turn her, that this will help him accept the loss of Claudia and come be with him. It's an act of controlling the situation to try to control for Armand's desired outcome (Louis loves me and will leave Claudia behind for me) but he's doing it under the people pleasing lie of 'this is what Louis needs, this is what will make him happy' when really it's about what will make Armand happy and safe. In that act subconscious fawning has become conscious manipulation.

While Armand's emotional detachment and lack of reaction to the burning of the theater and death of Denis is in many ways related to his self-admitted inability to feel anything at that time, there's also an aspect of fawning there: in order to people please one cannot offer their real feelings for fear of upsetting the companion. So really it just leads this situation where Louis doesn't know how Armand really feels about anything. He never shows Louis a moment of hurt or anger or outage, which we readers know he is capable of, because in order to feel safe and continue to 'please' he cannot let himself feel anything at all except that which his companion feels.

And that's why their relationship crumbles, because Louis is right: they cannot offer each other real love because Louis is mired in grief and Armand is incapable of being fully honest. He can't cultivate a true sense of self and show Louis that self because he's too swept in fawning for him and 'pleasing' him. Even when he and Louis break up he doesn't show his hurt, doesn't articulate having felt neglected. He just walks away, holds it all in, and fawns away his own feelings.

So that's why I think the best thing he did was that moment of sincerity with Daniel right before he turned him: admitting that he felt like a coward, and that he loved Daniel far too much to let him die.

In his explorations with Daniel Armand stops pleasing and swings to far other end of the spectrum for a time: he is so utterly absorbed in exploring the world and figuring out who he is and how he fits in that at times he doesn't consider Daniel's feelings much at all. But by the end of things when the running begins, he doesn't chase Daniel until Daniel calls for him. He becomes honest about his feelings and desires, despite the layers of shame he's heaped upon them. He stops detaching and fawning and gets real.

Which in the end is the key to him re-uniting with Louis and building a healthier relationship, creating his own home, opening the door to future reconciliation with Marius and having Daniel move back in with him. Armand had to learn to be himself fearlessly so that he would have genuine love to give.

[spotlightstudios]

Wizard 101: Hey kid, you just got pulled into Wizard School, and it looks like you're ready to start. Go down that path and someone will teach you to fight. Oh shit, that's Malistare, uhhhh, *one minor battle later* Good job kid. Go and do some little quests and beat up some fairies, you're doing great! :)

Pirate 101: You're in jail. Pirates are breaking you out of jail! They're... asking about your trauma. You're a pirate, an orphan, the son of a whore and a scotsman, you were raised by another group of people, now you're pulling a jail break and helping other prisoners escape! A uhhh, a guy threatens to murder you. He's the one who locked you up. The pirate guy almost dies and you have to drive his ship??? *one stressful sail later* Hey kid, go beat up this guy who stole from me. I'm gonna cheat and scam you, btw, just so you know. :)

[strawberrystepmom]

tbh I can tell I am changing even though it hurts bc instead of indulging in terrible self destruction to hurt myself with I am actually taking the route of being gentle with myself and desiring gentleness and love instead of being ripped limb from limb in an effort to be cared about

[selunesfavouriteprincess]

I can’t even lie over time this pathetic little elf has grown on me and now I really like her as a character. she’s SUCH a loser. and someone said that she should’ve been recruitable instead of Halsin after uncovering the Shadow Druid plot and she could’ve had a redemption arc and now I can’t stop thinking about that alternate reality

[min-kit]

Thinking about Evan Buckley. The boy who was born as spare parts. Evan Buckley who tried soooo hard to get his parents attention to the point of self-harm. Evan Buckley who, as a child, got all of his attention from his sister, who was eventually pulled away by her abusive boyfriend, leaving him alone. Evan Buckley who upon realizing he doesn't know who he is tried every job he could to figure it out. Evan Buckley who acted out and flirted and had women on a string because he seeks attention because he's never had attention joining the 118 to be the hero. To have people look at him and be like wow, he's cool, only to find a group of people who become his family. Evan Buckley who slowly realizes he doesn't have to act out and flirt with every woman to get attention, he can just be himself. Evan Buckley, who upon meeting Eddie Diaz, was frightened that this family he has formed would replace him. That now that this cooler guy is in the group, he won't be needed. Evan Buckley who realized that's not true, that there's room for both of them, and now his family is even bigger. Evan Buckley who felt like he lost all of this when he was removed from his duties at the 118 due to his injuries, and was once again scared that they'd no longer have time for him, that he'd be back to how it was when he was vying for his parents' attention. Like how he had Maddie's attention when he was a child, but she left, now his found family is leaving him too. Evan Buckley who realized that's not true because this family isn't built on something so simple as being co-workers. This is his family for life. To Evan Buckley who, despite realizing these things, is stuck on the hamster wheel. Evan Buckley who doesn't understand why all of his relationships fail. Evan Buckley who doesn't know what it is he is doing wrong. Evan Buckley who, despite all the strides he has made in seven years, still doesn't feel whole. Evan Buckley who sees Tommy and thinks wow, that's a cool guy, which is what he wanted people to think when they saw him. Evan Buckley who, like he did so long ago, is vying for the attention of someone. Evan Buckley who sees this cool guy and his best friend so seamlessly hit it off and is once again left attentionless from two people he's craving attention from. Evan Buckley whose jealousy causes him to hurt his best friend and he feels horrible and what is it that he's doing exactly? Why does he want this attention so badly?

Evan Buckley who stands across from Tommy and admits aloud to him that he was jealous and he's wanted his attention and slowly... slowly the wheels are turning in his head. The light bulbs are coming on. His heart is beating. And that puzzle piece he's been missing for his entire life is being slotted into place.

Oh. He's bisexual. And he's never felt like enough because he never felt like a whole person. Because he tried so desperately to fill that whole with other people's attention and this is what's been missing. This is who he is. And now he can breathe. Now he can explore. Now he can be himself.

I'm thinking a lot about that Evan Buckley.

[sysig]

Finally made a Parapluesch OC, introducing Mama Oz ♥ (Patreon)

[huellitaa]

you're all insane 😭🫶🩷 now should we do something for this or leave it at me screaming ab it all day?? thoughts?? 🩷💕

[uncanny-tranny]

When you grow up, you might feel afraid that you would hate your older self if you met them. It's weird to imagine that you could be so different than who you are now.

I think it's freeing, though, to have grown so much that you would almost be unrecognizable. There are still glimmers of who I was in the mosaic of who I am today, but I have grown and developed in such a way that... I am not just me anymore. I think that's a big aspect of growing. You won't always be this way, and that realization can make it easier to embody everything you want to be because now you aren't chained to the idea that you can only be one way, that you are beholden to everything around you.