#god im a boring person lmao
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yeah, im gonna try to revive my Tumblr “career”, ‘cause i don’t think i wanna use Twitter anymore lololololol
#that’s what happens when one only follows like 10 people#one of which is an incel you met in your benkyō-aka phase#does anyone here know what a benkyō-aka is?#it’s most definitely a japanese thing#a manifestation of Japan’s university entrance exam culture#also obligatory FUCK ELON MUSK#… i still don’t know how to use this platform well#could it be because i don’t have any so-called hyperfixations#nor any fandoms im invested in and such?#god im a boring person lmao
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characters that make sense to be living in wayne manor without much if any explanation: bruce, alfred, damian, tim, cass
#so so often im reading fic n going like 'STEPH? are you insane'#bruce & alfred: yeah. self explanatory#dick: would but only under circumstances where he Has To for someone else's sake#jason: grown ass man who fights his foster dad every chance he gets#which could also be a description of dick during certain times but i digress#tim: he'd try very hard not to but i can technically imagine him ending up there without a mission related reason so he makes the cut#steph: she has a whole ass mom. disrespectful to her to pretend steph would rather live w bruce tbh#damian: yes but he'd complain about it. at least it has enough room for his personal petting zoo.#cass: enigma. she can do whatever idc enough to figure her out.#she bores me still ngl#the closest i ever got to caring about cass was when i was reading rumors about a scrapped catholic arc for her lol#duke: another where im pretty sure he ends up having relatives that he can go to and having him live w bruce instead feels odd#but also im a new earth bitch not a prime one so idk what his life is like#honorable mention: babs: are you insane. grown ass woman. only semi-recently has been deaged to hell and i do not respect that call from DC#unless she and bruce are married there is no reason for her to be there lmao#i say honorable mention bc that ones rare as hell. thank god.
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Just said "sheesh, Kenna, you're the smartest person I know" out loud while reading your tags on the FMA Truth and Ed's atheism post. Then I realized that Indiana probably doesn't care as much for this information as you might lolol
honestly i'd originally written a really annoying ramble about gods in fiction under that post and now i'm so glad i deleted it to write that much more succinct breakdown of my thoughts on the matter
#I have such a ramble I could go on in every single direction of this topic because this is the stuff i think long and hard about#but im not even sure which part of my tags impressed you lmao#i feel like im just constantly shouting 'theres nuance!' about an issue which has#in fact truly deeply caused a lot of pain and hurt in the world! so like of course people dont want to see the nuance!#and they dont need to! thats a thing for me to have fun thinking deeply about - if its a cause of strife dont even worry about it!#i am actively working on a story right now where the 'gods' are knowingly lying and manipulating the mortal population#but like. they can't not. because they're not 'gods' as is all-knowing all-powerful supposed-to-reward-the-good-punish-the-bad#i think because thats a kind of god referred to in stories that im disinterested in. its boring and also comes with so much baggage#im way more interested in 'gods' as in creators. and thats it. i made this planet but thats all i can do. i cant fix it#or i made this ocean. i cant stop you from drowning in it i can just make ocean#and i'd never thought of it in terms of the laws of physics but like YEAH ACTUALLY. gravity as a god. i pull things together#you NEED to fight it sometimes! it kills you and it keeps you alive and there's no morality to it!#im also interested in gods as like. alien consciousnesses. like if there was a guy out there and he gave you life but#if you looked at him he would blind you and if you touched him he'd vaporize you#like just take all the physics and reality of the sun and put it in a person-shape and give it a voice#like again theres no morality to the sun! but once we personify things like that we start putting morality and baggage on them!#anyway im rambling lmao i could go on for hours. i just loved the idea of Truth as god just like Gravity as god
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#i think this is just my irritability from my meds#so i’m putting my rant down in the tags#im going to delete this later but i just needed to get this out bc i’ve seen it quite a few times now#but if i see one more fuckin person say something along the lines of ‘stop drawing the iterators/slugcats in this way because it’s boring#or wrong or doesn’t match up with MY HEADCANON’#im gonna fucking lose it. if you want to see slugcats or iterators drawn how YOU like them. why don’t YOU draw them. or YOU pay other#artists you draw them for you?#the fact that some people are so god damn entitled to fanworks that passionate people are making FOR FREE#this isn’t about any of my followers or anything and i block people who say shit like that on sight but for real.#your interpretations of characters and designs are not the end all be all. i interpret sigs shape language as pointy! a lot of the fandom#sees her as square! you know what i DONT do? make posts about how artists should stop drawing him square#you know what i DO do? draw her pointy MYSELF!#i’ll delete this later bc it really doesn’t matter and it’s NOT directed at any of my followers or moots it’s just a general thing ive seen#you do realize that most of what we have to go off of are 10 pixel tall muppets right.#going crazy stupid with designs is FUN! im beginning to think some of y’all take this shit WAY too seriously lmao#anyways.
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Yeeeeah!
The main cat dads (plus dog dad) from A Man and His Cat
#desiree talks#desiree reads#we have two dilfs and two gilfs lmao#i’ve said before that ‘cute guys doing dumb/cute things’ is pretty uncommon#especially ones that arent idol or sports series#mainly slice of life/comedy#so it was nice that i finally decided to binge read this one#some on my personal list are romance but they focus enough on the main guys and their friendship that it doesn’t matter#like im not a huge fan of daily lives of high school boys bc i do not care about the girls#and they’re like 2ndary main characters like partway when i watched the anime#super light on romance would be onee danshi hajimemasu and a destructive god sits next to me#where one guy has a crush on a girl and he has several dumbass friends#then nijiiro days and koi ni mudaguchi where all guys have individual romances#personally I thought nijiiro days was pretty boring but i really like koi ni mudaguchi in comparison#i think the romances are cuter and i like how the main cast interacts with one another#i hope that it gets an update soon#i really want to buy a set of the phys jp copies one day
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found out yesterday that a friend of a friend who ive never really liked for various reasons but mostly because she thinks she's the only one who knows what good music is (which is like mostly classic rock and like "unknown" swedish bands and hates on hiphop and rap a lot as "objectively"bad" music) and looks down on and puts down people quite vocally and regularly like really condescendingly because of this is a huge taylor swift fan 💀
#like im surprised because its sooo not what she usually totes as gods gift to music but also lmao#NOT surprised#seeing how she grew up in a super affluent part of the city#like taylors music was like made for the type of girl she is even if she's 'super alternative'#apparently when my friend was like ummm what?? like super confused why she would like her music#she was like 'oooh but shes like this self made woman in the music biz her lyrics are soo good'#💀💀💀💀 neither true objectively but ok lol#tell me again how im boring because i like 'soulless popmusic' and how 'bad' hiphop and rap is again#personal#sorry lmaooo i just find it soo funny honestly#i dont even care that much about her i can usually ignore her but shes also become like a real shitty friend to my bff#ANYWAY
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theres this post that has a screencap of the journalist in an interview going "do you think when X manipulates people, it's his way of showing love?" and the actor (?) being interviewed goes what?? did i mishear you?? manipulation as showing love? what kinda fucked up home did you grow up in?? and like man i don't even go there and the question could have been just stupid/not that deep or whatever but wooow what a loser ass answer to a potentially interesting question. embarrassing
#shrimp thoughts#everyone in the notes is like lmao slammed! what a stupid journalist! and im here like wow. kinda cringe#soooo many things can be a sign of love. including violence and murder. but noooo love is pure love is sincere and altruistic#and manipulation is Bad Ugly and Toxic :( if it's not perfect and the way god intended it's not Love :(#boring. boooooooriiiiiiiiiing#one person in the tags was like 'this is how you know whether someone's a movie star or an actor because a movie star might have#nodded along to it. an actor actually put THOUGHT into it' lmfao. sure. as seen above the person put LOTS of thought into their answer
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"how to make your character more likable" "where do you rate likability when you think about characters" "top 20 likable characters" "likability is so important for books" "your characters absolutely must be likable or your book is a failure" "how to make unlikable characters in a likable way" i hate it here i hate it so much. i am going to rip out the throat of likability culture with my own teeth.
#it's coming to the point where i cant even handle the term 'likable'#no!!!! shut up!!!!!!#the fixation on character likability is genuinely such a bad trend for fiction#im sorry. but if you only care about whether your readership will like your characters youve lost in some way#make believable characters. make complex characters. make insane characters. make weird characters. make heartbreaking characters.#but my god stop thinking so much about if your characters are likable.#who! gives! a! shit!#the reality is some people will love or hate your character based on literally nothing than their own subjective opinion#there is no way to make a character likable to everyone. or even most people.#so just dont care about that! and we as readers really gotta stop making this the number one thing to care about in a character#i dont give a fuck if a character is likable or not. are they complex? are they a little weirdo i can rotate around in my mind for days?#do they have motivations and dreams and heartbreaks? do they feel like a real person?#all of those metrics matter 10000x more to me than if i personally like them or not.#there are perfectly unoffensive bland ass characters who exist to be likable and are boring in literally every other aspect#if you focus on likability you have to sand so many edges off of your characters#they cannot be mean or offensive or rude or harsh or weak or vulnerable or or or#bc! they have to be LIKABLE! which means they can only be strong powerful perfect lovable#wrote my own post bc i saw poll results about if characters needed to be likable and blacked out with rage lmao
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The heart wants toxic yuri and drunk calls and drunken confessions but the mind tells me to be a responsible adult living in the real world with a 9-5 😐
#why is this world so boring why can't i be an immortal witch who dies every night in the battlefield only to be cleaned up and resurrected#in secrecy from my gf who hates fighting but only to be found out to her horror and be cleaned and picked up by my gf every night#why can't healing magic exist in the form of girls kissing why can't i be puking flowers if im puking anyway#like healing and doing better is great but god is it boring lmao#i kinda miss how dramatic my first unofficial heartbreak was.. like that was bad for my health but very interesting for the plot#now instead i journal and play an instrument and don't talk to ppl abt how i feel and work a stable job and hang out with my friends#WHICH ARE NORMAL PEOPLE ACTIVITIES and i think it's good to be being a normal person rn but i haven't had a like. big dramatic cry yet.#i cried before the break up but i haven't really had a big sob or anything after it and part of me misses feeling the range of emotions#like i was angstier when i was 15 this experience has been so calm and muted it even surprises me i feel like i should feel more hurt abt it#alas i missed my best chance to like actually act heartbroken. like if i do anything now it's kinda gonna be more for the experience and bit#god it's the theatre kid in me lmao i just. i want to experience what it's like crying and calling drunk walking home in your friend's arms#but ig if ur w ur friends they wouldn't let u call ur ex? so ig walking home alone at night drunk and crying!#but that feels unsafe. so maybe just. drunk alone at home? but that also feels like a liability#what do u even say on the call? im drunk can u pick me up pls? 💀💀💀 i don't think that's gonna work.#ok god i need to stop thinking abt this lmao im gonna be tempted to do it for fun but aaa self control self control#think instead abt the independent project u have. and ur diagnostic score. and the fact that u already broke ur favorite shirt.#where do ppl get interesting lives. the older i get the more my life has settled down into some stable npc life which i do like. but still.#can't help but realize i live in a very different world than most ppl. my coworker constantly asks me how old i really am.
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Travis kelce is really riding this Taylor swift clout train for alllllll that she’s worth, huh? and y’all are supporting that….ok!
#personal#LMAO#the way he talks about Taylor swift as if she’s not there? it feels like that to me if that makes sense#like he knows what he’s doing and he knows he’s got so much support for it and it’s just gross like he just won’t stop talking about her 💀#I get the biggest ‘meathead guy’ vibes from him and it just makes me angry how much people are into this and it’s disgusting to me like lmao#im down for taylro to get her D but maybe for someone who won’t gloat about it like she’s a carnival prize 🤧 would be preferable#and maybe someone with some charisma or personality or something bc this man seems so boring to me but Taylor swift famously has awful taste#in men so I shouldn’t be surprised I just want this to be over with I’m so tired of seeing this man everything I know is against my will!!!#I thought the ratty situation was as worse as it would get but god I honestly prefer him bc he at least didn’t parade her around like TK 🤢#this is @ nobody on here shdjsjdjis I’m just so tired of waking up to him talking about her again on a fuckin podcast or twitter like gross
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Something something hubris fall of man anyway nearly tweeted a baity statement about ppl drawing cuteguy feminine and saying that's Bad is a bit homophobic (I can't be the only one who sees people saying 'hes buff and muscly stop drawing him cuuutteee' is a bit police-y of a) the harmless artistic expression of a fictional character and b) how men are allowed to present especially in a superhero context)
Glad I deleted it but my opinion stands ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I just think if you find ppl drawing cuteguy personally insulting. Maybe think about why a male superhero has to be expressed as masculine and muscular and why he can't be drawn as a feminine expression. Why is that necessary to you (especially because grian does not engage with that side of the fandom and realistically Does Not Care)
#catfish speaks#im so tired and bored at work i want to Start Something#but i know if i do it will be bad#anyway theres less chance people follow me here lmao#only person who really cares about this is like. 1 maybe 2 irl friends#and i can have solid interesting discussions about this with them in person#god im so tired the focus is Out the window today lord help me
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I feel sorta shitty. My hip is sorta out of place so it's tweaking, and mt back is aching a shitload. Ugh.
#diary#personal#i. sorta wonder if i exist. like i do. but when i spend so much time sorta kinda here. i dont really.#i. really dont like people lately. it sucks. i hate trying to talk. then getting talked over. its my fault.#ahhh. im so tired. i dont wanna do anything.#i need to do some laundry so i can like. do stuff. it sucks knowing i need to do it but i just cant#ive just spend the last two days infront of the tv doing nothing but reading n shit.#it feels like its been a week. just absolute monotony.#i wonder why ppl sometimes suddenly stop talking or start talking to me.#i mean. ive sorta gotten used to it by now. its why i dont have friends though.#the way i used to try to keep hold of ppl is just talk with them a bunch. and just. force myself into their lives.#never rly works. sorta feels like nothing i do does.#i dont wanna work. god. even though i am working i still feel utterly useless. and i am.#im really lonely yknow. but im also not. i just want the things i think i want. but dont actually.#yknow? everything i want is fake. its not real. im loved but im not. im tired but i just need to try harder.#ahh. im so fucking tired. god i wish i wouldnt wake up tomorrow. its just another fucking boring day.#im so bored yknow? whats the point really lmao. haah. why do i try lol.#i guess i dont though. so its my own fault. its just all so boring and tiring. i hate it here.
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na jaemin x catgirl!reader (M)
minors dni
summary: jaemin finds a stray catgirl and takes her under his wing.
warnings: hybrid au. lots of fluff :3, bratty!reader, dom!jaemin, big dick nana, loss of virginity, breeding, creampie, unprotected sex, mild squirting, kitty eating (lmao), fingering, fellatio, praise kink
word count: 6.0k
a/n: jaemin is the biggest cat person i know (besides me duh) so why wouldn’t i write a fic about him being down bad for his lil catgirl?
jesus fuck this was long and took forever 😪 sorry it's posted later than promised but at least it's longer than my last two fics combined! lmk if you want to see more of jaem and his catgirl bc im really liking this au
“fuck this shit man.” jaemin was so sick of his boring ass 9-5 office job. every single day he deals with incompetent coworkers (how did they even graduate high school), entitled clients, and a shitty boss that wanted to put all the work on him because he knew jaemin was a good employee.
jaemin took out a pack of newports and lit a cigarette, leaning his head back against the alleyway wall and sighing in frustration. the cold winter air bit at his nose but he didn’t care. this was his one time to really relax right after work. as he was taking a long drag, a rustle from the dark alley caught his attention.
he paused. “who’s there?” jaemin squinted his eyes against the pitch black darkness. this was a shady part of town and jaemin knew better than to be hiding out in the back alleyway of a sketchy convenience store but he also had a reputation to hold up. couldn’t have anyone from his work or person life finding out the social butterfly nana was a chainsmoker and hated his life.
against his better judgement, he put out the lit cigarette and moved closer to the rustling noise. turning his phone flashlight on, he didn’t know what he’d expect to see. maybe a raccoon or a stray dog.
he certainly didn’t expect to see the sweetest little thing hiding and shivering under a dirty cardboard box. there you were, hair matted, skin covered in grime, thin clothes in tatters, brown ears pressed flat against your head. and despite your disheveled appearance, jaemin thought you were just the cutest thing he’s ever seen. as his phone flash shined directly on you, you jumped in fright, body immediately tensing up in alarm. you bared your teeth at him and hissed, claws extended.
“woah hey i’m not gonna hurt you,” jaemin back away slowly, putting his hands up.
“fuck off,” you gritted at him, sharp teeth still showing.
“what are you doing out here like this? it’s freezing and you don’t have any clothes. where’s your owner?” jaemin crouched to the ground, trying to inch closer to you but you tucked yourself smaller into the corner.
“don’t have an owner. don’t need one. m perfectly fine by myself. now leave me alone, human,” you growled at him.
jaemin attempted to reach a hand out to you but you swatted at him and hissed, leaving a small gash on his hand.
“do you have a name, kitty?” jaemin asked softly.
you continued to glare at him. “leave me alone.”
jaemin knew it would be really difficult to get you to open up but he had such a soft spot for animals, especially strays. and he couldn’t just leave you alone looking like this in the winter cold.
“kitty, it’s way too cold out for you to be here without any proper clothes.” jaemin stated. “my name is na jaemin and i only want to help you, okay?”
your body was still tensed in suspension of this stranger but as he continued to get closer to you, you got a whiff of his scent. nose scrunched up cutely, you sniffed up at the air, needing more of that delicious scent. god he smelled so so good. despite the bitter cold of the winter air, the scent of this stranger left your body feeling warm and fuzzy inside, slowly melting your tough exterior. but he was still a stranger, one you had no idea the intentions of, and you didn’t want to take any risks.
“stop patronizing me and just leave me alone, stupid human.” the longer you were around him, the less alarmed your body felt, but you still kept your guard up around this delicious smelling stranger. and jaemin didn’t miss how your body language slowly got less tense the longer you were around him.
jaemin got up slowly, deep in thought. “i’ll be right back, kitty.”
he disappeared around the corner of the alley again, leaving you feeling slightly empty. stupid, you thought. he’s just a stranger. of course he’d leave like everyone else. you knew that rationally but your body was acting so weird around this stranger.
you continued to sit there, huddled beneath the cardboard and desperately seeking warm, when the stranger came back, this time with a steaming cup and a hotdog.
“here, baby,” jaemin cooed at you, handing you the cup of hot chocolate and hotdog. for some reason, your belly felt so warm at his calling you baby. “you must be so hungry.”
you eyed the food suspiciously. “why are you being so nice to me, human? you don’t even know me. you don’t even know my name.”
“doesn’t matter to me. nobody, hybrid or human or animal, deserves to be shivering in the winter cold like this,” jaemin stated with a serious look on his face.
you cautiously grabbed the food and drink from his hand before scarfing down the hotdog in record time and chugging the hot chocolate, some cutely dripping down your chin. your brown ears twitched in happiness. god jaemin thought you were just the cutest thing.
“y/n. it’s y/n,” you mumbled at him. “thank you for the food.”
“y/n, such a cute name for the cutest kitty,” jaemin smiled brightly.
he reached one hand out slowly to brush your hair out of your face. you just about jumped at the contact, but as he scratched that sweet spot behind your ears, your tail swished in happiness and you started to pur in delight. you closed your eyes in bliss and leaned slightly into the contact.
“good girl. such a sweet girl. i know you were so frightened, all alone in this winter cold. but nana’s got you now, m’kay?” jaemin cooed at you.
your body and brain were melting. his touch felt so so good, it’s been so long since you’ve been pet like this. and his smell, god you’ve never smelled anything so delicious before.
“y/n, i know we just met and i know you must so scared right now. but i can’t just leave you like this in the cold. please, let me just take you back to my apartment and you can stay there for a couple nights. i have an extra room so don’t worry about needing to sleep with me. i’ll give you a fresh set of clothes and feed you while you’re there. but i can’t just leave you here in good faith.” jaemin gave you a sincere look, practically pleading for you to come back with him.
your tail stop swishing and you scrunched your little nose in heavy thought. on one hand, you knew next to nothing about this man and he wanted you to stay at his place? but a warm bed and a fresh set of clothes and hot meals sounded so so good… and how much harm could this good smelling stranger even do to you… the rational part of your brain was telling you no, this stranger couldn’t be trusted. who knows what he’d do to you once you were in his territory? but your body was saying otherwise, he made you feel so good inside and he could take care of you even for just a few days.
you gave a long hard stare before replying. “okay. just for a little bit,” you whispered softly, still scared out of your mind.
jaemin used his beefy arms to support your weight as he helped you stand up on shaky legs. he wrapped his winter coat around your shivering body, cooing sweet reassuring words into your ear. his scent was absolutely intoxicating to you, leaving your mind fuzzy and full of him.
as soon as you stepped into his apartment, you were greeted with three balls of white fur bombarding your legs. one licked and nibbled on your toes, another purred and rubbed itself against your legs, and the other circled around your legs, tail swishing happily. you squealed at the sight, such cute kitties!
“ah ah lucy, luke, and luna, let’s not scare our guest, okay babies?” he spoke to them in such a gentle tone, it had your heart melting.
“n-no, s’okay, nana. i love kittens,” you reached down to pet them and give them chin rubs. all three kittens cuddled close to your body and let out loud purs. jaemin’s heart fluttered at your usage of his nickname.
“what are their names?” you asked.
“this one is lucy, this one is luke, and this one is luna. i got them a few months ago. i didn’t want to separate these three siblings so i just adopted all three. aren’t they just the sweetest things?”
you nodded, letting out purs alongside the kittens. you would never tell him this now but you also thought jaemin was so sweet.
he crouched down to pet the kitties alongside you. “they must really like you. they’re not usually this sweet and welcoming to guests. guess they recognize a kitten just as cute as them too.”
you pretended to not notice his last comment but your red face and happily swishing tail gave away your happiness.
“y/n, let’s get you into the bath and some clean clothes, hm? i know you must be dying to get this grime off you,” jaemin gently whispered, still petting the three purring kitties on the floor alongside you.
you paused, ears twitching. “bath?”
“yeah, a bath,” jaemin replied, looking up at you to gauge how you felt. your nose was scrunched up cutely in disgust at the mere idea of a bath.
“don’t need one. can lick myself clean,” you grumbled, pouting slightly.
you stopped petting the kitties, who seemed very displeased at the lack of attention you were giving them, and finally took a look around his apartment. the unfamiliar environment made you slightly uneasy but somehow you knew you were going to be safe. everything just smelled so strongly of him, it made your head dizzy and belly warm.
“kitty, you need to take a bath. i’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable now but you will feel so much better after,” jaemin gently reassured you.
you shook your head, cheeks puffed and ears pinned back. “no. don’t want.”
jaemin sighed, rising to his feet. “c’mon baby. let me run a warm bath for you. i promise it will feel so good.”
he tried taking your hand but you hissed and swatted at him. “no. away.” you backed yourself into a corner.
jaemin gave you a defeated look before disappearing around a corner. you sat back down to cuddle and play with the kittens.
jaemin came back to see you playing with the kittens so happily. it seemed they really helped make you feel comfortable in this foreign environment and his cats liked you so much already.
“kitty, come with me,” he prodded at your arm.
you narrowed your eyes at him suspiciously. “where are you taking me?”
“you’ll see.” jaemin decided to take it upon himself to carry you in his arms bridal style. his strength had you flinging around like a ragdoll, making you very angry.
you started clawing and biting at his arms, kicking your legs and screaming wildly. “let me go! let me go! hey!”
he brought you into a steamy bathroom and sat you on the ledge of the bubbly bathtub. he used his strength to pin your hips in place as he kneeled and situated himself between your legs.
“baby, i know you don’t want to take a bath but you need to wash this dirt off yourself. just listen to nana, hm?” he stared deep into your eyes with a serious look on his face, causing you to shift around in unease.
you broke eye contact and looked away, pouting deeply. “fine. you’ve literally given me no choice anyway. i’ll get in the stupid bath.”
you practically ripped your tattered clothes off your body and jumped straight into the water, splashing water and bubbles every where. you thrashed around wildly in the water, slipping and sliding all over the place. god, how long ago was it since you’ve had a bath like this?
jaemin reached into the water and held you firmly upright, using his thumb to rub you reassuringly. “woah, kitty. be careful, it’s dangerous to be so careless in the water. you can hurt yourself.”
“too long since i’ve had a bath like this,” you moaned, slipping under the water til your nose was just sticking out.
jaemin rolled up his sleeves and started rinsing your hair, massaging circles of shampoo into your scalp. you purred contentedly, tail swishing and splashing in the water.
“such a good kitty, doing so good for nana,” he murmured lowly as he washed and rinsed your hair and body affectionately.
you stayed in the tub, splashing around happily, until the warm water began to run cold. jaemin allowed you to step out before drying your body with a fluffy white towel. he dressed you in a pair of his grey sweatpants and a fuzzy black hoodie that smelled oh so deliciously of him. you inhaled the neckline of the hoodie deeply, his smell making your limbs dizzy and head fuzzy.
“all better now, kitty?” he smiled teasingly at you.
you gave a sheepish smile back. “thank you, nana.”
“it’s getting late, baby. let me get you a little snack. stay here on the couch,” he gave you a small peck to your head and walked to the kitchen.
his kittens strutted up to you, meowing and begging to be held. you grabbed all three in your arms and snuggled them close to your chest, pressing kisses to their fluffy fur.
jaemin walked into the living room, holding a glass of warm milk and a plate of cookies, to see you with his babies. his heart fluttered at the sight, so freaking adorable.
“this is for you, y/n,” he walked over and handed you the milk and cookies.
you smiled appreciatively at him before furrowing your eyebrows cutely. “why are you being so kind to me? we just met a few hours ago.”
jaemin shrugged his shoulders and sat next to you, grabbing lucy into his lap and stroking her fur. “i’ve always been a cat person, as you can see.”
you munched on the cookies happily and let the kittens snuggle up to you. luke and lucy fell asleep on your lap, purring contentedly. you let out a soft yawn and fluttered your eyelids. jaemin chuckled. you were just so stinking cute.
“getting sleepy, baby? i’ll take you to the guess bedroom,” he grabbed your arm, sleepy kittens still in hand, before leading you to the room right across from his bedroom.
“can i sleep with the kittens tonight?” you whispered softly.
“of course, baby,” he replied.
before he could turn to walk back to his room, you grabbed his sleeve and gave a quick peck to his cheek before scurrying to hide underneath the covers. your face was hot and red.
so freaking cute, jaemin though to himself, grinning widely.
it was the middle of the night. you didn’t even know what time it was but you couldn’t fall asleep. your mind was running a million thoughts all at once. what were you going to do when jaemin eventually got tired of you freeloading and kicked you out? how were you supposed to live back on the street now that you know what kindness feels like? you liked jaemin so much you didn’t want to leave him.
before you could think it over, you slowly got out of bed and knocked on jaemin’s door. a sleepy jaemin with a raspy voice and half-lidded eyes opened the door.
“yes, baby?” his sleepy voice was so sexy to you.
you stared hard at the ground. “m sorry for waking you, nana. i couldn’t sleep. would it be okay if i slept in here? just for tonight. you smell so good and comforting i thought maybe-“
he stopped you, lifting your chin to look you deep in your eyes. “kitty, don’t be so nervous around me. of course you can sleep in my bed, c’mon.”
he beckoned you over and lifted the comforter up, allowing you to slip in under the covers. he tried to lay a respectable foot away from you but you started whining and pawing at his arms to come closer. he scooted an inch closer but you grabbed his arms and wrapped them around you, snuggling your face into his thick chest and purring happily. your ears twitched cutely and tickled his face. jaemin was shocked at your boldness but molded his body to yours and cuddled you tightly.
“much better,” you sighed happily. you inhaled deeply, his smell flooding your senses. he was so warm and so comfy, you were in heaven. who would've guessed you'd be in this position when you were just swatting and hissing at him earlier in the night?
you fell asleep quickly, letting out soft sighs as you snoozed away. but now jaemin couldn’t fall back asleep. how could he? he had the sweetest little catgirl snuggling so cutely in his arms. he felt so guilty for it but he could feel his erection growing. he cursed at himself. stop being such a horny fuck. she may be cute but she trusts you to not be a freak around her, he thought.
somehow, jaemin ended up falling asleep and he woke up to you staring up at his sleeping face. your wide doe eyes were so cute just watching him adorably, he could wake up like this every day.
“morning, nana,” you whispered softly. during the night, your legs got tangled with his as you rest your hands on his chest. you could feel how thick and built he was underneath the thin material of his shirt, making your rub your thighs together unintentionally.
“good morning, baby. did you sleep well?” his deep morning voice sent shivers down your spine. his half lidded eyes and sleepy smile made him look so sexy.
you gave him a toothy smile, ears twitching and tail slapping against the bed. “yes i did. best sleep in a long time.”
he gave you a deep kiss to the top of your head, inhaling against your scalp. now that you’ve had a bath, you smelled so sweet and soft and milky. “glad to hear that. let me make breakfast before i have to leave for work.”
he slowly got up from underneath the covers, making you whine and reach for his arms to cuddle you once more.
“baby, i need to make you breakfast. can’t have my sweet kitty starve, now can i? look lucy, luna, and luke are here and they look like they want cuddles too.” he gave you a wink as the three kittens jumped on the bed and walked over to you.
jaemin returned with a plate of fresh fruit, eggs, pancakes, and some bacon. your ears perked up and you sniffed the air excitedly.
jaemin chuckled at your excitement. “hungry are we, kitty?”
you nodded excitedly. “i love pancakes. it’s been so long since i’ve had them.”
you scarfed down the breakfast jaemin made for you. bits of egg gathered at the corner of your mouth and jaemin wiped them away for you.
shyly, you told him, “thank you. for the breakfast and for everything, nana. i’ve never been treated this kindly before.”
jaemin scooted closer to you and wrapped his arm around you, giving you a sweet peck on the cheek. “anything for my kitty.”
he checked his watch and jumped up suddenly. “shit! i’m gonna be late for work.” he rushed into his closet to grab clothes to change into.
you sat on the bed as he stripped to his underwear and put on black slacks and a white button-down. you blushed at the sight of his bare body, thinking he was so sexy but you’d die before telling him that.
rushing to put his shoes on, he gave you one final kiss on the cheek before heading out the door. “i’ll be back tonight for dinner, okay kitty? i’ll leave a 50 on the counter so you can buy whatever you want for yourself. see you this evening, baby.”
your heart sunk. you didn’t want him to leave you again. not when you just met. you knew he was going to come back home (he had to) but that didn’t fill the empty hole in your heart. your eyes welled up with a few tears before you wiped them away with your sleeve. jaemin has been so kind to you so it was time for you to stop looking like a bum and fix yourself up cutely for him.
later that evening, jaemin returned home to not just 3 kitties running up to him to give him some love but also you rushing up to give him a big bear hug. your little body crushing him with a tight squeeze as you nuzzled your face in his chest made his heart melt. he felt you purring against his chest as his arms wrapped around your body.
“missed me, huh kitty?” he teased.
you loosened your grip to look into his eyes. “yes i did,” you pouted seriously.
“i missed you too, baby. let me take these work clothes off so i can make dinner for you,” he replied, giving your head a sweet kiss and inhaling your milky scent.
you reluctantly let go as jaemin’s eyes widened at the sight. you were wearing the cutest little outfit he had no idea where you got it from. a short white mini skirt with a tight lacy pink crop top that showed off your plump tits that were practically spilling out of your shirt. you even had baby pink thigh highs with little bows on them.
“like it?” you smiled up at him, giving a little swirl. he caught sight of little white panties underneath your skirt.
jaemin was breathless. “where did you get this little outfit, baby?”
you smiled even wider. “used the money you left me to go shopping for this. i told the lady to help me find something to impress you and she showed me this.”
jaemin eyed your body hungrily, making you squirm and rub your thighs together. “so, nana? do you like it?”
jaemin gave you a tight hug, pressing his body against yours. you could feel his bulge against your pelvis, making your panties so wet. “i love it, baby. you’re so cute.”
your tail swished happily as you purred against him. “yayyy,” you said excitedly.
“baby, let me go make dinner for us, kay? just wait for me and we can cuddle after.” he hummed against your head.
for dinner, you sat in his lap on the couch, eating your steaming bowls of soup and happily cuddling with the three kitties. your little skirt rode up your thighs, causing your panties to peak out. you wiggled your ass around on jaemin’s lap, sighing contentedly as jaemin shifted around so you wouldn’t feel his hardening bulge.
“thank you again, nana. i appreciate everything you’ve done for me,” you purred.
jaemin gave you a wink. “of course, my baby. you can stay with me for as long as you need. i’m not just gonna throw you out.”
you sat up excitedly, tail swishing, as you turned to face him. “really? you really mean it?”
jaemin nodded. “of course. stay with me as long as you need. my home is always open to you.”
you set your bowl down and gave him a tight hug. “yay yay yayy!! thank you, nana!”
you leaned back to look him in his eyes when you slowly looked down to stare at his lips. slowly, you inched forward and planted a sweet kiss on his lips, sucking and licking gently. jaemin was shocked at your boldness but reciprocated your kiss with a renewed fervor. you wrapped your arms around his neck and sat there on his lap as you made out with him intensely.
“fuck, baby,” he groaned against your lips, rubbing circles on your back and lightly bucking his hips against yours. you let out soft whimpers and moans.
you pulled away from him and rested your foregead against his to gaze deep into his eyes. you looked so fucking hot in that moment jaemin was about to lose it. puffy lips, wild hair, lidded eyes staring at him seductively, ears twitching so cutely. you stared at each other, air tingling with tension and need.
jaemin broke the silence. “baby, i don’t have work tomorrow. let’s go shopping and buy you some cute clothes to wear, kay?”
you nodded and sunk your face into his neck, sniffing at his sexy scent. “yes, i would like that a lot, nana.”
for the next few weeks, you would drive jaemin crazy. always prancing around wearing the cutest little outfits that would leave nothing to the imagination. snuggling and cuddling him so cutely whenever he had the tiniest bit of freetime to lounge around. sleeping in his bed and tangled up in his arms while rubbing yourself against his body. kissing him and making out with him at every possible moment but never going further than that. you were so so clingy with him, always whining and pouting when he had to go anywhere without you. and when he got back, you’d cling to him like a little koala. you were just his sweetest, cutest little kitten and he wanted to gobble you up.
“nana, don’t leave me. how long will you be gone this time?” you pouted and pawed at his chest, pressing your body against his.
“baby,” he sighed. “i need to go drop this off at the post office. i’ll be back in 20 minutes, okay? then i’ll give you your cuddles.”
you sniffled. “meanie.”
when he came back as promised, 19 minutes later, you ran and jumped up into his arms. “you came back, nana! missed you so much.” you pressed a sweet kiss against his lips.
“you’re so precious, kitty. my sweet kitty always so good to nana,” he hummed against your lips.
you pulled away. “nana, i have a problem.”
jaemin started to press soft kisses up and down your jawline. “hm?”
“i’ve been feeling weird lately. i don’t know how to explain it.”
he paused, eyebrows furrowed in concern. “what do you mean, baby?”
“everytime you touch me like that, i get all tingly.” you pointed to your privates. “i get all warm and hot down there. and my panties get a little wet. is there something wrong with me?”
jaemin’s jaw dropped in realization. oh. oh.
“oh, baby. uh,” he started, setting you down on the ground gently. “how do i explain this?”
you tilted your head expectantly at him.
“it means you need me.” he said simply.
you looked confused. “need you? of course i need you. you’re my nana and i’m your kitty.”
“no baby. it means you need me to touch you right there.”
you had a look of realization on your face. “oh.”
“baby, i can help you. i can make you feel really good. but only if you tell me, okay? i won’t do anything you don’t want.” he said slowly, gauging your reaction.
you had a sure look on your face. “nana, i trust you. please touch me.”
jaemin growled and smashed his lips against yours, gripping your ass with one hand and running his hand through your hair in another. you purred needily, rubbing your legs together and feeling that warmth between your legs again.
“baby, can i take this to the bedroom?” he sighed breathlessly against your lips.
you nodded excitedly and chased his lips with yours once more. he hoisted you up by your waist and wrapped your legs around his waist. you lightly grinded against his abdomen, causing him to groan and curse against your lips.
he threw you onto the bed, knocking you breathless, and climbed on top of you to kiss you deeply once more. you whined and bucked your hips up against him in need.
“need more, nana,” you whimpered.
“m getting there, baby,” he said as he started to take your skirt, top, bra, and finally panties off your body, never disconnecting his lips from yours.
he reached his hand down to lightly tease your leaking pussy. you felt so warm and hot down there, you needed more. “more! more!” you cried out.
he took one finger and lightly went around your sopping hole. “fuck, this pussy is so wet for me, huh? you have no idea how long i’ve wanted this. the perfect kitty.”
he plunged one finger in, which had you whining and bucking against his hand. as he pumped his finger in and out of your drooling cunt, he slowly added another finger, then another. he alternated between pumping your cunt and taking his fingers out to play with your clit.
you moaned and cried out. “fuck yes! yes, more, please oh god more!”
he planted a deep kiss on your lips. “my kitty is doing so good for me.”
suddenly, he ripped his hand from your cunt, which had you whining and pouting. then he crawled down to face your beautiful pussy. you were so wet and leaky, all for him. he groaned and shoved his face right into your cunt, tonguing at your hole before licking a strip up to your clit. you screamed and cried out, gripping at his hair and shoving his face further into your crying pussy. he started sucking and licking at your clit before shoving three of his fingers back into your hole, pumping up and hitting your G-spot. tears rolled down your face from all the pleasure.
you felt your core get tight. “nana! nana! feel funny down there… my pussy keeps leaking more!” you cried out.
he looked up from your cunt. he looked so fucking sexy, eyes lidded and face dripping with your arousal. “baby, don’t worry. just relax and feel good, kay?”
he dove back into fingering your dripping cunt and sucking and licking at your clit when you felt a wave of pleasure burst from your core. your cunt squirted out wetness as you screamed in pleasure.
“oh god! nanaaa!!” you sobbed, covering your face with your arm from the intense pleasure.
he grinned, licking his lips and fingers clean, and gently pulled your arm from your face. “let look at you, gorgeous. that felt good, right?”
you nodded vigorously. “nana, need more. felt so good.”
you pulled at his belt loop and started unbuckling his jeans. he let you pull his pants down as he took his shirt off, exposing his sexy toned body. you were drooling at the sight.
“nana, you are so sexy,” you whispered, staring directly at his chiseled abs.
he winked at you before finally pulling his boxers down and letting his rock hard cock spring free. your eyes got as wide as saucers. he was massive. so red and veiny, thick from base to tip, and a slight curve upwards. a bead of pearly white liquid gathered at the tip. his balls looked so big and heavy too. your mouth watered.
“wow,” you whispered to yourself.
jaemin smirked, giving himself a few pumps. “like it, baby?”
you nodded slowly. “i’ve never done this before. can i put it in my mouth?”
jaemin groaned. “fuck baby, you’re gonna be the death of me. so cute and so fucking hot.”
you leaned down and started licking the shaft, started at the base. you sucked his balls softly, letting the weight of them rest on your tongue as you moaned softly.
“just like that baby, fuck. sure you’ve never done this before?” he groaned and snaked his hands into gripping your hair.
you shook your head before licking his cock from base to tip. you gave his cock a small kiss and gulped. how were you going to fit this in your mouth. he was huge. slowly, you sucked on the tip before taking more and more into your mouth. you bobbed your head up and down on his cock as jaemin let out the sexiest groans. you let your tongue lick at the veins on the underside of his cock as you went faster and faster.
“oh, baby. fuck, you suck dick like a pro,” he moaned out. “you’re so gorgeous and perfect, you know that? i love you, my sweet kitty.”
all of sudden, you bottomed out on his cock, sticking it all in your mouth at once. you gave a few licks to his balls.
“oh fuck, fuck, fuck, m gonna cum,” jaemin cursed.
he ripped your head off his cock with a lewd pop. leaving you whining and chasing his cock for more. he threw you back against the bed and pinned you down, cock bouncing angrily against his stomach. you rubbed your legs together as your pussy leaked and drooled in need.
“as good as you suck dick, baby, i need to finish inside you,” he growled, giving you a deep kiss.
he reached into his nightstand to pull out a condom.
“what’s that?” you asked, furrowing your eyebrows and tilting your head.
he ripped the packet open and started rolling it on his cock. “it’s called a condom, baby. you put it on before having sex to prevent pregnancy.”
you shook your head slowly. “do you have to wear it? don’t want you to. wanna feel your cock in my pussy raw.”
jaemin paused. “you sure, baby?”
you nodded. “very sure.”
he groaned and cursed to himself. something about “fuck, she’s so sexy and she doesn’t even know it.” he ripped the condom off and threw it off the bed somewhere. then he climbed back on top of you and propped your legs up against his shoulders and lined his cock with your entrance. he gave himself a few punps and teased your soaking hole with the tip of his leaking cock. “ready, baby?”
you nodded vigorously and whined, bucking your hips up to meet his cock. he bottomed out inside you with one thrust, causing you to scream out.
“oh, nana! fuck!” you cried deliciously. your ears twitched so cutely it had jaemin wanting to pound you hard and fast immediately.
he paused his hips to let you against to his size. “are you okay, baby?”
you kissed him. “if you don’t move i might lose my mind.”
with that, he pounded your little pussy with his big cock hard and deep. you cried and screamed at the intense pleasure, claws scratching at his back. the lewd sounds of his balls slapping against your ass had you leaking all around. you squirmed and wriggled underneath him, causing him to use his strength to pin your hips to the mattress.
“fuck baby, you feel so good. real thing is much better than what i’ve imagined,” he growled against your neck.
“oh jaemin,” you called out.
his hips went faster and harder. “say it again. say my name, baby.”
“j-jaemin,” you cried. “jaemin jaemin jaemin! yes oh fuck yes!” in the deep mating press he had you in, you felt the tip of his cock kiss your cervix sweetly.
“oh baby, i love you so much. love my sweet kitty so much. so precious and so sweet to me.” he groaned into your neck.
you were losing your mind in pleasure. “oh jaemin, gonna cum again. more please more!!”
his hips rutted into you impossibly fast, god you were losing your mind. you felt your core tighten and burst with pleasure once again, waves of orgasm washing over your body. your pussy squirted all over his abdomen and spasmed around his cock. his hips continued to fuck you through your orgasm, leaving you feeling overstimulated with pleasure. fat tears rolled down your face as you sobbed and clawed at jaemin’s back.
“m gonna cum too baby,” he gave you a sweet kiss on your lips. “doing so good for me. so good for nana.”
with a final deep thrust, he bottomed out inside your pussy and let out hot white spurts of cum, so much that some dripped and leaked out even as he was still balls deep inside. he collapsed on top of you with a groan, inhaling your hair deeply. you laid there panting and covered in sweat.
“love you, kitty,” he whispered softly into your ear.
“love you too, nana.”
#nct dream smut#nct dream x reader#nct smut#nct x reader#nct dream#na jaemin x reader#jaemin x reader#na jaemin#jaemin smut#jaemin#nct#jaemin fluff
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en garde! 𖦹 CL16
PAIRINGS: charles leclerc x fencer!leclerc!reader , f1 grid x fencer!leclerc!reader
SUMMARY: charles had been asking you to teach him fencing, and you finally did.
REMINDERS: this is purely fiction, the way how the character is portrayed in my story does not reflect the person that is portraying my character in real life. always separate fiction from reality, and do not repost or copy my work in any way.
WARNINGS: smau mixed with narrations, inconsistent photos, typos, not proofread, cursing, no use of y/n on the narrations, poorly google translated italian, and all photos are taken from pinterest
FACE CLAIMS: all from pinterest
WORD COUNT: 4.5k
AUTHOR’S NOTE: it’s been a long time since i added a new fic to my leclerc!sister series, so here it is hehe sorry, i’ve yapped a LOT about fencing on the narration part, so pls forgive me 😭 i hope i didn’t bore you a lot with fencing stuff 😭 i’m also accepting request for this series (i’m running out on ideas lmao 🥲) but i hope that you’ll enjoy this one!
ynleclerc
liked by charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend, sofia_rossi, marcoromano.fencing, landonorris and 783,984 others
ynleclerc E' passato un po' di tempo, Italia 💘
view all 12,837 comments
charles_leclerc when are you coming home?
ynleclerc idk, why?
charles_leclerc are you serious right now ����
ynleclerc what…🧍🏻♀️
charles_leclerc check my messages for once 😐
username1 OH HOW I MISSED YOU 😭
username2 the y/n drought has finally ended!!!! 😭
username3 MOTHER IS BACK, MOTHER HAS POSTED 😭🎉
landonorris thank god you’re alive. i thought you’re already dead somewhere 😔💔
ynleclerc bro what 😭
landonorris anyways, when will you teach me how to fence for a new quadrant yt vid
ynleclerc you sure you’re up for it? don’t want you poking yourself with the foil
landonorris 😠😠😠😠
sofia_rossi CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!!
ynleclerc 🥰🥰🥰
username4 OUR FAV FENCING DUO IS GOING TO SEE EACH OTHER SOON??? OMG 😭❤️
francisca.cgomes you’re in italy and you didn’t even tell me? 😠
ynleclerc I FORGOT IM SORRY IM SORRY!! but hey, i’m italy 🥰 hangout soon?
francisca.cgomes of course!!! just text meeee!!
username5 SHE REMEMBERED HER PASSWORD 🥳
ynleclerc posted a story!
liked by charles_leclerc, sofia_rossi, yourbestfriend, francisca.cgomes, marcoromano.fencing and others
charles_leclerc when will you teach me fencing 😔
charles_leclerc can’t believe it’s so hard to schedule one with you 💔💔💔
charles_leclerc i need big brother privileges 💔
ynleclerc USHCJJSJD CHARLES 😭
ynleclerc i’ll be home by next week! (hopefully you’ll be home as well 🤥) damn, can’t believe our schedules never really align
charles_leclerc ❤️❤️❤️❤️
francisca.cgomes i’m free tomorrow!! how about we go out for brunch?
ynleclerc KIKAAAA!! yes yes, ofc! ❤️
francisca.cgomes YAY!!
username6 OUR FENCING DUO WILL BE REUNITED SOON 😭❤️
username7 oh we pray for times like this (you being active on ig 😔💔)
MONACO
The sound of clashing blades echoed through the halls of the Club d’Escrime, a backdrop to your training session with Marco, your Italian coach. Fully suited in your white fencing uniform, mask tucked under your arm, you watched the double doors open, revealing your brother, Charles and his videographer, Antoine. The latter already had his camera rolling, and Charles, in his usual casual style—jeans, a dark hoodie, and white sneakers, looking like he had just stepped off a magazine cover.
“Finally!” You said, walking towards them with a smile. “Thought you’d never make it.”
Charles chuckled, spreading his arms in mock exasperation. “Don’t start! You’re the one who’s always impossible to catch. What is it this week? Tokyo? Budapest?”
“Home, for once,” you replied with a laugh, gesturing around the salle. “But that’s rare, as you know.”
“The place is very stunning,” Charles said, as he marveled the interior of the salle. “So this is where gold medals are made?” He teased.
“Something like that,” you replied, your voice light with pride. “Though Marco here deserves half the credit.”
“Ah, Charles! Finalmente ci incontriamo,” Marco greeted, shaking Charles’ hand firmly. His thick Italian accent added a charm to his words. “Your sister talks about you a lot.”
“È un piacere finalmente conoscerti. Lei non parla mai di me quando vinco, però.” He joked, shooting a playful look your way.
“Not true, and you know it.” You rolled your eyes at the comment.
Marco laughed, patting Charles on the shoulder. “Well today, we’ll see if athletic talent runs in the family, sì?”
“Okay, so here we are at the Club d’Escrime in Monaco. This is where my sister trains—when she’s not winning Olympic gold, of course,” he said grinning at you and turning towards the camera.
“We’ve been planning this fencing lesson for many months now, but with her busy training schedule and my racing calendar, it’s been almost impossible to find a day that worked for both of us. So finally, today is the day!” Charles added.
“Did you mention how excited you’ve been?” You quipped, folding your arms.
Charles smirked. “I may have. But, let’s be honest, you’re probably more nervous than I am.”
“Nervous?” You scoffed. “Why would I be nervous? You’re the one holding a weapon for the first time.”
“Ah, but I’ve seen the movies,” he countered, mimicking a clumsy lunge. “How hard can it be?”
You laughed at his theatrics, shaking your head. “We’ll see how long that confidence lasts when Marco puts you through the warm-up.”
“Speaking of which,” Marco interjected, “shall we start soon? Time is short, and I want to see if he can last more than five minutes.”
“You’re in for a workout.” You teased and smiled.
Charles gave an exaggerated sigh but could not hide his amusement. “Great. I love being underestimated.”
“You’re about to learn that fencing isn't as easy as people make it look on TV.” You smiled at the camera.
“Or tiktok.” Charles quipped, earning a chuckle from Marco.
You gestured towards the piste. “Alright, let’s get you geared up. I don’t want to hear any excuses later.”
Once Charles was all suited up, he stepped onto the piste, fully suited in his borrowed fencing gear, and you couldn’t help but pause. There was something striking about the way the jacket, breeches, and long socks suited him. The silver sheen of the lamé, a metallic vest worn over the jacket for scoring, added an almost regal touch. You smirked as you took in the sight of your brother adjusting his gloves.
“Oh my god. I’ve never looked so good.” Charles said as he came out all suited up.
“Would you look at that,” you began, folding your arms. “Hate to admit it, but you look good. Maybe too good.”
Charles glanced up, clearly amused. “Oh? Surprised your brother cleans up well?”
“I’m just saying, if this racing thing doesn’t work out, you might have a future as a fencer. Imagine, Charles Leclerc, Olympic Champion.” You gave him an exaggerated once-over. “The gear suits you.”
“I mean, I do look the part.” He smiled, striking a mock fencing pose, which was more comedic than impressive.
“You do,” you admitted with a laugh. “But let’s see if you can move like a fencer before you start planning your second career.”
“Basta con i complimenti. Time for the warm-up! No excuses later when your legs start complaining.” Marco smiled.
Charles groaned playfully, shooting you a mock glare. “Leg day already gets me in the gym. Don’t let him overdo it.”
“Stop whining,” you teased, motioning for him to follow Marco. “You’ll thank him when you’re not limping tomorrow.”
“We begin easy,” he said, demonstrating a forward bend. “Touch your toes, Charles. Keep your legs straight.”
“Easy for you to say,” he muttered, glancing at Marco, who was effortlessly folding himself in half.
“Come on, Charlie. You can’t lose to a guy twenty years older than you.” You chuckled from the sidelines, standing near Antoine, who was filming the entire thing.
“Thanks for the encouragement,” Charles quipped, finally managing to graze his toes. “I see you’re enjoying this too much.”
“I am.” You admitted, voice light with laughter.
Next were lunges, which Charles did with ease, his form surprisingly precise. “Now these, I can handle. We do this in the gym all the time.”
“Good. Now arm extensions, long and controlled. Think of reaching for the target.” Charles mirrored Marco’s movements, extending his arms fluidly.
You couldn’t resist teasing, “not bad, Charles. Maybe you’re a natural after all.”
“Maybe I am,” he replied, smirking. “See? I’ve got this.”
“Next is jumping jacks,” Marco interrupted, clearly amused by your banter.
Charles transitioned smoothly into the exercise, his movements energetic and practiced. As he worked through the routine, Charles suddenly turned to you, his tone curious.
“Why don’t we ever train together? Seems like it could be fun.” Charles glanced at you.
“Because you’d complain the whole time.” You laughed, shaking your head.
“Hey, I don’t complain that much.” He argued, clearly offended.
You just laughed at him, waving a hand dismissively. “Fencing is my thing, Charlie. I need to focus when I’m training, it’s not all fun and games.”
“And today isn’t serious?” Charles raised a brow, pausing mid-jumping jack.
“Not really,” you admitted with a shrug. “Today’s more about proving to you that fencing isn’t as easy as it looks.”
“Good luck with that,” he said, clearly amused. “You forget who you’re talking to.”
“Charles,” Marco interjected, a mischievous glint in his eye, “your sister has a gold medal, she might surprise you.”
“I don’t doubt that,” he said sincerely, before his grin returned. “But I’m still confident I can keep up.”
“That’s the spirit!” You smiled.
”The floor is yours, campionessa.” Marco smiled as he stepped back, and gestured for you to take over.
“Alright,” you turned to Charles. “Let’s start with the basics. This is going to be your crash course in fencing, everything you need to know before you touch the blade.”
Antoine, still filming, zoomed in on Charles’ face as he nodded, looking serious. “I’m ready, let’s hear it.”
“Fencing is one of the oldest sports in the world. It dates back centuries, originally used in dueling and combat training, but over time, it became more of a sport.” You explained. “In fact, fencing has been part of the Olympics since the very first modern games in 1896.”
“1896?” Charles repeated, very intrigued. “So, it’s been around forever.”
“Pretty much,” you confirmed with a smile. “Since then, it’s evolved into three distinct disciplines—foil, sabre, and epee. Each had different rules, strategies, and weapons. That’s what makes fencing so fascinating, you’re not just swinging a sword around. It’s a mind game as much as a physical one, that’s why some call it physical chess.”
Charles tilted his head, clearly interested. “What’s the difference between the three?”
“Come on, let me show you guys.” You walked over to a nearby rack, where several swords were neatly displayed, each one gleaming under the salle’s lights.
“This is a foil.” You picked up a foil, you held it up for him and the viewers to see. “It is the lightest of the three weapons, weighing about 500 grams, and the one I use. Foil fencing focuses on precision and technique, the target area is only the torso, and points are scored with the tip of the blade.”
Charles reached out, and you handed him the foil. He tested the weight of the blade, lifting and lowering it.
“It’s lighter than I thought.” He admitted, giving it a small swing.
“Foils are meant for agility and speed,” you explained. You then picked up a sabre, slightly heavier with a distinct curved guard. “This is a sabre. It’s a bit heavier, and the rules are very different. In sabre, you can score with the edge of the blade, not just the tip, and target area is the upper body—above the waist, including arms and head.”
“Sounds aggressive,” Charles remarked, running his hand along the blade’s flat edge.
“Oh, it is,” you chuckled. “Sabre is all about speed and attack. It’s fast-paced, almost like a sprint compared to foil’s more calculated, chess-like style.”
“And the last one?” Charles asked, pointing to the remaining weapon.
“This is the epee,” you said as you picked up the epee, handing it to him. “It’s the heaviest of the three, about 775 grams, and the target area is the entire body, head to toe. But in epee, there’s no right of way, whoever hits first, scores.”
Charles tested the epee in his grip, nodding thoughtfully. “So it’s more…straightforward?”
“In a way, yes,” you said, setting the sabre and foil back on the rack. “But it can also lead to longer matches since there’s no restriction on who can attack when, you need all the patience you can get when playing epee.”
The camera panned as you gestured for Charles to follow you back to the piste. “Now, let’s talk about the rules. In foil, which is what we’ll be learning today, the target area is just the torso. No arms, legs, and head. If you hit anywhere else, it doesn’t count.”
“Got it,” Charles said. “What about the scoring?”
“In foil, we use something called right of way. It means that the fencer who initiates the attack has priority. If the other fencer wants to score, they have to defend or parry first, and then counterattack.”
You picked up a foil and demonstrated, lunging forward in a quick, fluid motion. “For example, if I attack you like this, you can’t just hit me back. You’d need to block my blade first.”
“So, it’s not just about being faster, it’s about timing.” Charles frowned slightly, absorbing the information.
“Yup,” you said, impressed. “It’s about strategy and reading your opponent’s moves. Now, there are also some practical rules. The piste, the one we are standing on right now, is 14 meters long and 1.5 to 2 meters wide. If you step off, you lose ground or even a point, and you can’t use your off-hand to block, and obviously, no overly aggressive moves like charging into your opponent.”
Charles raised a brow. “No tackling allowed? Shame.”
“Not unless you want to get a penalty.” You laughed, shaking your head. “Lastly, to win a match, you have to reach a predetermined number of points, usually 15, or have the highest score by the end of the time limit.”
“Okay, I’ll give you a quick demonstration of how right of way works in a tournament.” You gestured for Marco to join you, and he grabbed another foil, stepping into position, as Antoine adjusted his camera as you stepped back onto the piste.
“Watch closely,” you instructed as you and Marco faced off. “Marco will attack, and I’ll defend and counter.”
Marco lunged forward with a smooth attack, and you parried, your blades clashing with a satisfying ring before you swiftly riposted, your blade landing lightly on his torso.
Turning to Charles, you explained. “Since I defended first and then countered, I get the point. Make sense?”
Charles nodded slowly, his brows furrowed in thought. “So, if I just swing wildly, it’s useless unless I have priority.”
“Yes,” you said smiling. “Fencing isn’t about brute force, it’s about control, precision, and strategy.”
“This all felt like a masterclass,” Charles chuckled. “This is very incredible stuff.”
Once Charles had a solid grasp of the basic rules and ths purpose of fencing, you decided it was time to get into the technical aspects.
“Alrighty,” you began, pacing in front of him, foil in hand. “Before you can start attacking, you need to learn how to defend yourself. So, let’s talk about parrying.”
“There are four primary parries in fencing, and each one is important for blocking and setting yourself up for a counterattack.” You added.
Charles nodded, gripping the foil in his hand as if ready to jump in. “Alright, I’m listening. Hit me with it.”
“Not literally,” you teased, pointing your foil at him briefly before continuing. “First is parry four. This is your standard parry, used to block attacks aimed at your torso. You bring the blade across your body like this.”
You demonstrated, twisting your wrist and angling your blade so that the imaginary opponent’s strike would be deflected away. Charles mimicked the movement, though his hand was stiff, and his blade angle slightly off.
You leaned in, using the tip of your foil to adjust his blade position. “Loosen your wrist a bit, it’s all about control, not brute strength. The goal is to guide their blade away, not smack it out of their hands.”
“Okay, okay. Got it.” Charles said, trying again. This time, his movement was smoother.
“Better,” you said, stepping back. “Next is parry six. The one is similar to parry four, but instead of protecting the inside of your body, it covers the outside. Like this.” You executed the parry with ease, your blade moving in a fluid arc.
Charles tried to copy the movement, his blade wobbling slightly as he adjusted his wrist.
“Close,” you said, stepping closer. “But watch your wrist, it needs to stay firm, or you’ll lose control of your blade.” You tapped the back of his hand with your foil, and he adjusted accordingly.
“Parry eight is for low attacks to the outside of your body.” You continued, moving on, and crouching slightly, angling your blade downward to demonstrate. “This one is a little tricky because it requires good reflexes. You’re aiming to protect your lower torso and legs.” Charles gave it a go, though his stance was a bit too wide.
“Too much space,” you said, tapping his knee lightly with your blade. “Keep your movements controlled. The smaller the motion, the quicker you can recover.”
“This is harder than it looks.” Charles exhaled, looking at the camera as he adjusted his stance.
“That’s fencing for you,” you said with a grin. “Last one, parry seven. This one is similar to parry eight, but it protects the inside of your body instead of the ourside.”
You demonstrated the motion, and Charles followed suit, this time managing a relatively smooth movement.
“Good,” you said, stepping back. “Now, key things to remember when parrying—keep your blade pointed at your opponent at all times. It’s not just about blocking, it’s about setting yourself up for a counterattack. As soon as you’ve parried, you need to riposte, counterattack, immediately. If you wait too long, you’ll lose your advantage.”
Marco stepped forward, foil in hand, and you turned to Charles. “I’ll show you how it’s done.”
You squared off with Marco, and as he lunged forward with a mock attack, you parried effortlessly, your blade gliding against his and redirecting it away. In the same motion, you extended your arm, blade tip landing lightly on Marco’s torso.
“See how quick that was?” You said, turning to Charles. “It’s a fluid motion—parry and riposte, all in one go. No wasted movements.”
Charles nodded, his brows furrowed in concentration. “Alright, let me try.”
You stepped aside, letting Marco face Charles. As Marco slowly lunged, Charles attempted a parry, though his movement was slightly delayed, and his riposte lacked precision.
“Not bad,” you said encouragingly. “But don’t overthink it. The more natural it feels, the faster you’ll be.”
“Okay, let’s talk about stance,” you said, planting your feet firmly on the piste. “Your stance is your foundation, if it’s wrong, everything else falls apart.”
You demonstrated, keeping your feet shoulder-width apart, one foot pointing forward and the other at a slight angle.
“Your dominant hand is the one holding the foil. The non-dominant hand stays behind you, raised slightly for balance. So, which hand are you using?” You asked.
“Right.” Charles said, switching the foil to his dominant hand.
“Good,” you said. “Now, copy my stance.”
Charles mirrored your position, though his back foot was slightly out of place.
“Close, but—” you tapoed his leg lightly with your foil. “Your back foot needs to be at an angle, like this. Don’t forget to bend your knees slightly. You need to stay low for balance and quick movement.”
“Not bad,” you said, nodding approvingly when Charles adjusted his stance. “Now let’s work on movement. When you’re in your stance, you need to be able to move forward, backward, and side-to-side quickly withou losing your balance.”
You demonstrated, gliding forward and backward with small, controlled steps. “Notice how my feet stay the same distance apart, no matter where I go. That keeps me balanced and ready to attack or defend.”
Charles followed your lead, though his movements were a bit stiff.
“Relax,” you said, smiling. “You’re not marching in the military. It’s more like a dance, fluid and controlled.” He tried again, this time loosening up slightly.
“Better,” you said. “Now let’s add a lunge, the lunge is your main attacking move. From your stance, you push off your back leg and extend your front leg forward, like this.” You demonstrated, your movement smooth and precise. Charles attempted the motion, but his lunge was too short.
“Bigger step,” you said, tapping his front leg with your foil. “You want fo cover as much ground as possjble without overextending.” After a few tries, he managed a decent lunge.
“Not bad,” you said, stepping back. “You’re getting there. Now, let’s put it all together—stance, movement, parries, and lunges. You ready?”
Charles grinned, gripping his foil. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”
“Alright,” you said, picking up the body cord, “before we start, we need to get you all hooked up.”
Charles tilted his head, examining the cord. “What’s that for?”
“This is a body cord,” you explained, stepping closer to attach it to his fencing jacket. “It connects your weapon to the scoring system. When you land a valid touch, the electrical circuit completes, and the scoreboard registers the point.”
“So no sneaky hits?” He joked, watching closely as you secured it to his back and guided it through the sleeves of his jacket to attach to the foil.
“Not unless you want the referee to see it light up,” you quipped, making sure everything was in place before handing him a fencing mask. “Here, put this on.”
“For this first round, we’re keeping it simple, call it a trial run,” you said, rolling your shoulders and flexing your foil. “Marco will referee and keep things light. Just focus on getting comfortable.”
“Got it. Don’t go easy on me, though.” Charles raised his foil slightly, his excitement evident in his stance.
You laughed. “Trut me, Charles, I won’t.”
Marco stepped onto the side of the piste, holding a referee’s clicked in one hand. “Alright, trial run. I’ll call the touches. En garde!”
You and Charles took your positions at opposite ends of the piste, foils raised in salite before dropping into the en garde stance.
“Prêt? Allez!” Marco called, signaling the start of the bout.
Charles moved hesitant at first, testing his footing as he advanced. You let him come forward, observing his movements.
“Don’t forget your stance,” you reminded him, stepping back slightly. “Stay balanced.”
He nodded, adjusting his feet, and made a tentative lunge. Charles’ foil grazed your blade, missing the target area entirely.
“Close,” you said, countering with a light touch to his torso. Marco raised his hand. “Touch!”
Charles shook his head, laughing. “Okay, that was fast. Was that even one second?”
“Welcome to fencing,” you said with a grin. “It’s all about timing. Relax, though you’re doing fine.”
As the trial run continued, Charles began finding his rhythm. He landed his first touch on your shoulder, earing a quick ‘touch!’ from Marco.
“How does it feel?” You asked, stepping back for a brief pause.
Charles grinned under his mask. “Not bad! Are you nervous yet?”
“Me? Nervous?” You teased. “Cute. Let’s see how you handle the next round round.”
The second round began, and Charles was much more deliberate in his movements. He used the parries you had taught him, successfully blocking two of your attacks and landing another touch on your shoulder.
“Not bad, Lord Perceval,” you said, nodding as you reset your stance. “You’re learning quickly.”
“Of course,” he replied, his voice light with mock arrogance. “I’m a Leclerc. We adapt fast.”
By the end of the round, Marco called for a pause. “Alright, let’s use the scoreboard for the next one.”
“See this?” Marco said, pointing to the display. “Every valid touch will light up here with a beep. First to fifteen points wins.”
Charles noticed the screen, which displayed yor names, complete with small Monaco flags next to them.
“Wait, you personalized it?” He asked, laughing. “Now I feel like I’m in the Olympics.”
“Of course,” you said with a grin. “Nothing but the best for my big brother.”
Charles chuckled, lifting his foil again. As you adjusted your own, you bent the blade slightly, an action that caught his attention.
“Why are you doing that?” He asked.
“It’s something all fencers do,” you explained, holding the blade up for him to see. “Foils are flexible, and bending them ensures they’re in good condition and won’t snap. It also helps make the touches more accurate and less painful.”
“Huh,” Charles said, mimicking the motion with his own foil. “Interesting.”
“Alright, this is it,” you said, lowering your mask. “First to fifteen.”
Marco raised his hand. “En garde! Prêt? Allez!”
The boug began, and Charles quickly demonstrated his growing confidence. He moved fluidly, landing a few clean touches on your torso and arm. You could see his competitiveness kicking in, and you responded with sharper attacks, forcing him to parry and riposte.
Halfway through, the score was tied at 7-7, and the beeping sound of the scoreboard filled the room with each touch.
“You’re doing great.” You said during a brief pause.
“Thanks,” Charles replied, panting slightly. “But I’m not letting you win.”
“Good,” you said, resetting your stance. “Because I’m not letting you win, either.”
The intensity ramped up in the final stretch. Charles managed to land three more touches, bringing his total to ten, but you quickly countered with a series of precise attacks, pushing your score to fifteen.
Marco raised his hand as the final beep sounded. “Touché! Match for her—15 to 10!”
“Lifting your mask, you grinned at Charles, who pulled off his own mask, shaking his head in disbelief.
“That was incredible,” he said, still catching his breath. “I actually thought I had you for a moment there.”
“Well fought, champ! Ten points is impressive for a first timer, you did really great.” You said, resting your foil on your shoulder. “But I told you, fencing isn’t easy as it looks.”
Charles laughed, running a hand through his sweaty hair. “Yeah, no kidding. I think I’ll stick to racing.”
Marco, who had been observing with a smile, stepped in. “You were actually good for a beginner. You’re a fast learner, Charles. I’ve work with a lot of first-timers, and not many can pick up that quickly.”
“That’s true,” you chimed in nodding. “You were way better than I expected. Usually, people take ages to figure out how to lunge properly or keep their stance balanced.”
Charles’ grin widened. “Well, what can I say? It’s in my blood to be competitive.”
Marco laughed, clapping Charles on the shoulder. “You should come by more often during her trainings. You’d make a good parry partner.”
“Oh stop feeding his ego,” you said, rolling your eyes playfully. “It’s already huge.”
Charles gave a mock bow. “Keep it coming, Marco. I’m soaking it all in.”
Marco just smiled as the camera zoomed in on you both as he continued. “Not, really, Charles. If you’re free diring off-season, you should consider it. You’d give her a good challenge, and it would keep her on her toes.”
“Hmm…” Charles leaned on his foil again, pretending to consider the offer. “Fencing during off-season. I might actually think about that.”
You laughed. “Sure, if you can handle beaten every time.”
“Bold words. But we’ll see.” Charles grinned. “So, what’s next for you? You’ve already won the Olympics. Where do you go from here?”
“Next up is the Fencing World Cup. It’s coming up in a few months, so I’m focused on preparing for that.” You smiled, feeling the excitement bubbling inside of you.
Charles nodded. “If people want fo follow your journey, where can they find you?”
“Everywhere.” You said with a laugh, then added, “but seriously, you guys can follow me on my social media. If you are curious about up coming tournaments, you can check out Team Monaco’s offical instagram. They post all of the updates there.”
Charles turned to the camera. “There you have it, guys.” He then faced you and Marco. “I just want to say thank you, for real. I know your schedules are crazy, and you took time to teach me something completely out of my comfort zone. I really had fun.”
“You’re welcome here anytime, Charles.” Marco smiled warmly. “You’re a natural. Who knows? Maybe one day, you’ll be on the piste at a tournament.”
Charles laughed, shaking his head. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, but I appreciate the vote of confidence.”
“You did great today,” you grinned, nudging him lightly with your elbow. “Who knows? Maybe we’ll see you fencing for Monaco one day.”
Charles smiled. “Only if you promise not to embarrass me in front of everyone.”
“No promises.” You teased.
Marco gestured toward the camera. “Alright, shall we wrap this up?”
You, Charles, and Marco all faced the lens. “Thanks for watching!” You said with a wave. “Remember, fencing is cooler than you think.”
“And harder than it looks!” Charles added. “Thank you both for taking the time to teach me, I had a blast today. It’s always fun learning new things.”
“Of course, Charlie!” You replied warmly. “We’ll be waiting for your next fencing session.”
“You’re always welcome, Charles.” Marco smiled. “Just don’t take too long to return, alright? We might have to recruit you into the team at this rate!”
All of you laughed as you said your goodbyes, and with that, the video came to a close, screen fading into black.
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yn.jpg just a regular day at the office (bonus: taught charles fencing, see slide 4! 😁)
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username8 never knew i needed to see charles in a fencing gear up until now 😮💨 THANK YOU MOTHER!
landonorris can’t believe you taught charles first, i thought i was gonna be the first one 😞💔
yn.jpg sorry, big brother privileges 😔✊🏻
charles_leclerc what she said! 😁❤️
landonorris i see that you have taken my advice
yn.jpg yes, and i owe it all to you sir 🫡
landonorris when will u be our quadrant athlete 😔🤲🏻
yn.jpg idk bro, what do they do? 🤨
yn.jpg just hit up my personal coach 😁
landonorris ME NEXT PLS
yn.jpg THERE ARE A LOT OF YOU WANTING ME TO TEACH YOU ALL FENCING 😭😭😭
lilymhe I ASKED HER FIRST! FALL IN LINE!!
landonorris IM HER BEST FRIEND
landonorris BESTIE PRIVILEGES
yourbestfriend EXCUSE ME????
landonorris EXCUSED
username9 WE FINALLY GOT A JPG ACCOUNT??? ACTIVE ERA IS UPON US?????
yn.jpg u guys really gotta thank lando for convincing me on making one bc apparently according to him, i always “ghost” you all 😞💔
username9 OHMGYGOSD I LOVE YOU 😭
username10 GAIUS 🥺🥺🥺🥺
username11 CHARLES WHAT ARE YOU DOING 😭😭😭
username12 petition for you to have a yt acc or tiktok or smth 😔😔😔😔
username13 and then what? we all ended up being ghosted 😔😔😔😔
username13 she barely posts on instagram, and now that she has a jpg account, i’ll take what i can get tl have some y/n content 😔😔😔💔💔💔
username12 omg u right 😭😭😭
username14 ok, scuderiaferrari, just hear me out this once…what if y/n teaches charlos fencing on a tiktok or yt vid? huh huh huh, wouldn’t that be a great idea, right? 😁
scuderiaferrari hmmm, i think you might be onto something 🤔🤔🤔
username15 i will sacrifice my first born for this to happen 🤲🏻
username16 we are BEGGING, on our knees
username17 charles leclerc in fencing gear, save me. charles leclerc in fencing gear, save me 🛐
#f1#formula 1#formula one#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc 16#cl16#charles leclerc x sister reader#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc x sister!reader#f1 grid x reader#charles leclerc smau#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc fic#charles leclerc fanfic#cl16 imagine#cl16 x reader#cl16 x you#cl16 smau#cl16 one shot#cl16 fic#cl16 x y/n
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𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 ____'𝐬 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐖𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞...
(A/N: Does not include Five)
𝑵𝒐. 1 , 𝑳𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 , 𝑺𝒑𝒂𝒄𝒆𝒃𝒐𝒚
girl next door trope
knew you ever since childhood
loves you to death
so soft with you
he's such a gentlemen
pulls out chairs for you and holds doors for you
butttttt you have to deal with his daddy issues
he always comes to you crying whenever something happens
a sweetheart with you though
he's very awkward at comforting you
he likes to cook for you
he's such a good chef ngl
he loves cuddling
he literally is always cuddling you
likes to be big spoon, don't get me wrong he needs comfort
but
the idea of being able to protect you by being big spoon is so validating to him
he's too big to be little spoon anyway
that is literally his one purpose
if he found you during the 60s or something and he had to leave you he'd never stop talking about you
"I miss (Y/N)..."
"(Y/N) would've liked this.."
"Luther, they're gone."
fml sobbing why did I write that
anyway his one purpose is to love and protect you
𝑵𝒐. 2 , 𝑫𝒊𝒆𝒈𝒐 , 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑲𝒓𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒏
very jealous
if he sees you with some guy who is flirting with you he will literally glare daggers into him
he will then proceed to walk over to you, sling an arm around your waist and pull you in for a kiss
he doesn't give a shit if anyone's watching
he talks shit about him siblings to you
"Luther thinks he's so much better than all of us-"
"Diego chill out."
oh my god when Viktor wrote that book
he
was
SEETHING
(no hate to viktor , viktor is baby)
the shit talk increased so much
he would not shut up about it
help diego would be such a simp for you
like I'm not joking
pure simp
in his eyes you are sweet innocent summer child who can do absolutely no wrong
stabbed someone?
pfft it was probably just an accident
he brings you to visit grace
omg it would be so cute
grace absolutely adores you
she always makes sly comments about how you and diego should get married
he goes redder than the colour red
he wouldn't tell anyone but he secretly loves the idea
he loves kissing your forehead
it's literally his favourite place
you and klaus are besties
he has to deal with you when klaus gets you drunk
"oh. my. god. im upside down."
"(Y/N), you're standing upright. we need to go home.
"... no"
he never gets drunk
fun squasher
he says his body's a temple
boring
youre his nurse
he always comes home injured and gets you to patch him up
he finds it hot
yes, he's bleeding out. yes, he finds you playing nurse to him hot.
priorities ig
he's so soft with you
would kill for you
he probably has
𝑵𝒐. 3 , 𝑨𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒐𝒏 , 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑹𝒖𝒎𝒐𝒖𝒓
(refuse to make her evil so s3 allison will not be mentioned)
definitely gets you an acting job in one of her films
she buys you the fanciest stuff
literally you two have the best closet
and you have your own personal stylist
bc why not
you do interviews with her all the time
fans absolutely adore you
there's so many paparazzi pictures of you two together and they eat it up
especially if they include you being doting to claire even though she's not biologically your kid
omg her fans would absolutely love that
so would allison though
if she saw you reading claire a story or smth
her heart would just melt
she might cry ngl
her two favourite ppl in the world just being adorable
you're the cool parent to claire
both of you go to fancy parties and are the hottest couple
"Allison! (Y/N)! How does it feel knowing you're America's favourite couple!"
you're so flattered
allisons just like: yeah ik lmao
she kisses you a lot in public
she knows damn well people are gonna get pictures of it but she loves it
you watch her films with her a lot
if its a particularly old one, you make fun of it with her
"oh my god allison. why do you look like that."
"IT WAS THE STYLE."
she then proceeds to also make fun of it
you, her and claire go on lots of fancy days out
you may as well considering you're RICH
luther gets a bit jealous sometimes
you help her with her therapy
you comforted her when she custody of claire
you also fought alongside her to get her back
as soon as you do you're happier than ever
you are literally just the cutest family ahdhahfhaj
but then she loses you again when she goes to the 60's
she made it her life's purpose to get back to 2019 with the love of her life and claire
as soon as she accepts that it could take years upon years to reunite with you and claire she finds ray
she knew you'd be happy
but she also knew
she'd never truly move on
omg help I'm gonna start sobbing why do I do this to myself
𝑵𝒐. 4 , 𝑲𝒍𝒂𝒖𝒔 , 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑺𝒆́𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆
you help get him off of drugs
ben adores you
he likes that you're there to help klaus
and that you don't ever drop to his level and just do drugs with him
he also likes how you never shit talk him when klaus starts ranting about how annoying he is
klaus is a huge fan of PDA
he is obsessed with the idea of holding your hands
he is constantly touching you in one way or the other
whether it be holding your hand
or simply having a hand on your leg
it matters to him
and that's why you love it
sweet baby boi has so much love to give
he likes being little spoon
he just loves being in your arms
it helps with his nightmares
diego also approves of you
you've saved him from having to go out and look for klaus in the middle of the night in fear he's high or smth
klaus rants to you every so often
quite often you have to help him through panic attacks
he loves you sm
like he is so lovesick
if anyone were to ever ask about you
oh boy
he gets this lovesick look in his eyes
and then starts rambling about how enamored he is with you and how great you are
it's adorable
he's very clingy but in the best way possible
he matches outfits with you
never a dull moment with you two
often it's you trying to solve whatever problem klaus has somehow managed to conjure up
and klaus just being a devious little shit
but it doesn't matter cause you love him
sometimes he questions why you love him
it makes you cry whenever he asks
"(Y/N/N)..."
you hum in response
"why do you love me...?"
sobbing and you start listing all the reasons
and then he's sobbing
and then you're both sobbing
but anyway
he loves dancing with you
he doesn't care what song
it could be some crappy pop song that's somehow in the top hits
or some classical music that's centuries old
he really doesn't care
he likes spinning you around
he loves seeing how happy it makes you
klaus asks you the most random stuff at 3am
"... (Y/N"
"yeah"
"lawyers hope you get sued, doctors hope you get sick, cops hope you're criminal, mechanics hope you have car trouble, but only a thief wishes prosperity for you."
"... go to bed"
"never"
you poor thing
you never get any sleep because of how chatty he is at night
he hates being away from you
if he isn't near you he will start whining to ben
𝑵𝒐. 6 , 𝑩𝒆𝒏 , 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑯𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒐𝒓
omg it took him ages to admit his crush on you
he's been crushing on you since you were like 12
when did he admit it?
when he was 18.
he likes reading to you
he loves seeing you get all relaxed at the sound of his voice
it makes him fall even more in love with you
he likes PDA but not that much
just a simple touch is enough for him
this boy blushes so easily
you'll brush his hand and he'll turn so pink
sometimes you'll just be sitting there doing nothing of note
and he'll be staring at you in adoration
he's in absolute awe of you
thinks you're the most adorable thing ever
much like diego
thinks you can do no wrong
you're his sweet, precious girl
he knows everything about you off by heart
from your favourite colour
to your mums favourite song
you thinks it's endearing
he loves holding your hand
playing with your hair is one of his favourite things to do
don't get me wrong he likes when you do it to him
but he much prefers when he does it to you
he finds it really relaxing
he's usually pretty closed off about his childhood but he trusts you
sometimes when something that triggers a bad memory happens he goes to you to rant
he doesn't know what he'd do without you
you're literally his life
omg
when you kiss his nose
he just melts
it's the most adorable thing
he's so good at cheering you up
no matter if its something minor or major
he's always amazing at getting you back to your usual self
he loves taking you on cute little dates
he reads you poetry he wrote
omg he deffo writes a piece of poetry about how much he loves you
omg help this is so cute
overall he's a simp
and it suits him
𝑵𝒐. 7 , 𝑽𝒊𝒌𝒕𝒐𝒓 , 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑾𝒉𝒊𝒕𝒆 𝑽𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒏
viktors a sweetheart
he gives you private violin shows
he also rehearses in front of you to see what you think
he tries to get you to critique him
if you don't play violin, you probably just say its all perfect
if you do, you probably give him little tips on areas to work on
you go on little dates to watch the sunset
he has to be little spoon
he just needs some comfort
just needs to be wrapped in your arms and feel safe
poor guy has been through so much
sometimes he gets mad memories of the incident with allison and you have to calm him down
he wouldn't get jealous
he'd just get rlly insecure :(
if he saw someone flirting with you he'd just get a bit sad
he would think the worst and think that you would want to leave him for them :(((
poor bby
opens up to you about how bad his childhood was
sometimes he regrets writing the book
you have to reassure him that it's okay and they don't hate him for it
sure, they did, but not anymore
klaus thinks you two are adorable together
you've got quite a few polaroids of the two of you together
he has them on those little string lights above your bed
he keeps at least one in his pocket at all times
he does that thing where you check if you still have something valuable and it's so cute for some reason
and when he checks and its still there it puts this small little smile on his face
omg it's just shfjsjfjsjf
you take care of him when he's sick
he hates it bc he feels bad that you have to take care of him
but deep down he loves it and will treasure those memories forever
but he'd do the exact same thing if you were sick
whenever you buy him something he always feels bad if he didn't get you something
"Vik it's okay! you didn't have to get me anything,"
"NO ITS NOT I NEED TO GO GET YOU SOMETHING RIGHT NOW."
it's absolutely adorable
Taglist: @book-place
#tua#the umbrella academy#umbrella academy#tua x reader#the umbrella academy x reader#umbrella academy x reader#luther hargreeves#luther hargreeves x reader#diego hargreeves#diego hargreeves x reader#allison hargreeves#allison hargreeves x reader#klaus hargreeves#klaus hargreeves x reader#five hargreeves#five hargreeves x reader#ben hargreeves#ben hargreeves x reader#viktor hargreeves#viktor hargreeves x reader#ur fav inactive writer
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OKAY BUT I HAVE MORE IDEA FOR BLUNT READER CUZ I LOVE THAT AU SO MUCHANDMDJFKSLDKF
So you know how french people's insult are always outta pocket (from a person who's first language is french I can tell you that no other language compares in insult -apart for African languages)
Like,, some "bad" insult here would be : bitch, fuck off, whore,..
Which we can all agree is boring...
BUT THEN IN FRENCH!!!
We be getting creative with it
Eg.
"mange tes mort" wich translates to "eat your dead (relatives)"
"vas te fair enculer" means "go get yourself pegged in the ass"
(yes, we have a specific word for being fucked in the ass 💀)
AND THOSE WOULD BE THE COMMON ONES AS WELL
English could never compare ✨
BUT ANYWAYS
how would the characters react if reader was from france/ belgium/ canada(or any other french speaking country) and started cursing people out like they eould do in their home countrie !?!?
The eay their face would drop
We would make a couple of people cry
AND GOD(us haha) FORBID A KID OVER-HEAR US AND STARTS REPEATING US
Trying to un-teach them would be hell *cries*
Your thoughts?
Love yaaaa~
ABSOLUTE TOP TIER ORAH MY BELOVED!!
Nobody has any idea how much I HATE ENGLISH both for its rules/pronounciation BS/etc. But also, most importantly, THERES LIKE NO GOOD CUSS WORDS- OR LIKE CUSS PHRASES??
I HAD TO PUT THIS GIF BC THAT WAS LITERALLY ME WHEN I HAD THE REALIZATION TO LOOK UP OTHER LANGUAGE CUSS WORDS AND I WAS JUST BLOWN AWAY BY HOW GOOD THEY WERE- HOW CREATIVE- 😫😭🥲 ENGLISH WHY R U SO SHITY IN EVERY POSSIBLE LANGUAGE SITUATION-
like idk we got "eat shit and die / fuck off / go fuck yourself" ???? Like- thats pathetic 😟.
I love hearing someone just cuss smbody out their native language/non-english, it’s so badass and cool to see
Anyway u already know i love non-native english speakers from the bottom of my heart✨️
GOD I FUCKING LOVE BLUNT LANGUAGE AU ITS LIKE ONE OF TOP FAV AS U CAN PROBABLY GUESS I COULD WRITE A LITERAL FANFIC ENTIRELY OFF THIS SIMPLE PREMISE 💖💓💗💞❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
omg so i HAVE SPECIFICALLY HEARD ABT FRENCH BEING RLLY CREATIVEEE
and i researched french cusswords/phrases,,,
😭 BRO IM CRYING
“bête comme ses pieds!” IM ROLLING ON THE FLOOR-
(trans: you’re as stupid AS YOUR FEEEEEETT)
idk what’s funnier, you translating urself in real time and saying all these phrases to ppl,
OR just scaring the ever-loving shit out of every teyvat citizen within a mile radius bc oh wow- you look pissed, so yeah somebody’s about to lose all their self-esteem for the rest of their life bc ur insults are known to be extra cutting bc ur so blunt-
OH CREATOR ABOVE (…oh creator, present??)- you changed to your holy language FOR THIS???
everybody just giving the npc the most bombastic side-eye for pushing you to do this,
or even just you stubbing ur toe/ate food when it was too hot
or my favorite, getting onto ppl like Wanderer when they do smth silly lmao
STOP I HAD A FOUL THOUGHT OF GETTING ONTO Ei AND WANDERER (like ei for not keeping him/at least giving him to someone else to raise, then all the shit he did as Scaramouche lol)
AND THIS CUSSWORD COMES OUT UNDER UR BREATH OR SMTH- DOES THIS FIT BC THIS KILLS ME:
“Putain de salope…” (whore of whore, I LIED IT MEANS FUCKING BITCH LMAO😭)
JUST GETTING THE MOM AND THE SON IN ONE FULL BREATH CRYINGGGG
STOPPP wanderer using it against other ppl ever since u used it lol
oh no stop dont bring the kids into thisss 😭😭
Klee would deffo be the first one to pick up ur words and use them, omg she just uses them as catchphrases like when throwing her bombs 💀
“Mange tes mort!” JUST WITH A SMILE ON HER FACE AS SHE THROWS HER HUGE SKILL BOMB INTO A FISH POND
Venti would definitely make sure the winds “pass along phrases of the sacred All-God language!”
which just means anyone who UNDERSTANDS YOU JUST GETS GENTLY CREATIVELY CUSSED OUT BY THE WIND IM SOBBINGGG
☆
i hope u guys are having a great summer! its basically too hot to go outside where I am, not unless ur going straight into the water or smth
which hey, ill be doing that this weekend, floating down the river about an hour away from my house with friends! :]
which,,, if anyone sees this, U GOTTA HELP ME THINK OF A 1000 FOLLOWERS MILESTONE THING TO DO IDK WHAT TO DO BUT I WANNA CELEBRATE IT BC I NEVER THOUGHT THATD HAPPEN!! lmk what u think in the comments if u read this!
☆
Safe Travels 0rah,
💀♒
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi
#srry i take so long to answer smth so simple#i actually have a surprising amount of asks!#i was thinkin abt it the other day like#damn should i reopen mail box#then i was like#not really bc i still got a lot of stuff to answer!#so now ITS CRAZZYYY to see my first posts/asks and see me trying to get ppl to send asks!#anyway i gotta make a 1000 followers thing bc i love u guys#sagau#genshin sagau#genshin impact sagau#sagau x reader#genshin imagines#genshin isekai#gender neutral reader#self aware genshin#genshin impact au#genshin x reader
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